Tumgik
#and goes to great lengths to show the pain he's in!
gaypirate420 · 5 months
Text
Haircut //Jasper W. Hale.
Jasper Whitlock-Hale x gn! reader.
Summary: Jasper did a thing while he was in a mood.
Angst/Fluff. Jasper icon by @jasperhaleobsessed
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
The vampire steps out of the shower, wrapping a towel around his waist. The water dripping down his yellow hair, his pale hand wipes the steam off the mirror above the sink.
Golden eyes stare at his reflection.
Paper white skin decorated with deep scars. His muscles tensed up. He leans over, his hands holding hard on the sink, cracking it slightly.
It hasn't been a great week.
No, it hasn't been a great month. Year. Decade(s).
Since Victoria and her wannabe army of newborn vampires showed up he's been spiraling each day.
Slowly, the glass have been a drops away from spilling.
The memories just flooded his mind everytime he closed his eyes.
They're always there, but they're more vivid this time, he doesn't like this, Jasper knows this cycle too well, he doesn't want to be part of it again.
He thought he was getting better.
Jasper's been pushing you away and he's an idiot for that because he needs you, he needs you so so so bad but Jasper just can't tell you he's struggling. And he doesn't know why that is. Maybe he feels ashamed for being so weak, so broken.
There's a reason why you and him have been together for almost fifty years. You just bring the best of him and make the pain go away. Always.
A smile creeps on his face but it goes away quickly, he sighs and looks at the mirror one more time.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"Jasper? Sunshine, you in here?" You asked while stepping inside the Cullen's house. The ironey flavor of blood still in your mouth after a successful hunt.
"...yeah." He mumbled from upstairs there was a slight shake on his voice. No waiting for you at the door? No bouquet of flowers? No forehead kiss? No 'Darlin' I missed ya.'?
Something happened. Something bad.
You approached your shared bedroom opening the door slowly.
Your eyes try to process what their seeing.
Jasper was sitting at the edge of the bed, eyes unfocused starring at the locks of hair on the floor. His pale fingers holding a pair of scissors, shaking.
And of course his hair. Short. Cut at random lengths after a fit of raw emotion. Anger. Sadness. Desperation. That's what his aura is filled with.
"Sweetheart..." You called softly and closed the door behind you. The vampire doesn't react to your presence at all, he just looks straight ahead, deep in thought.
Jasper catches on the steps getting closer to him and a gentle hand tilt his chin up gently to make his eyes meet yours. His almost numb expression makes you want to cry. The golden color of his eyes holds no shine, they're dull and empty.
"Hey, sunshine." You whisper softly and cup his face, leaning on your touch and a small gasp leaving his lips, if he was human he'll be all tears right now.
"Oh—it's okay, sweetheart." You whisper reassuringly. The blonde wraps his arms around your waist and holds you close, burying his face on your chest, taking a deep breath and drowning on your comforting scent.
You stroke his now short hair.
"...sorry" He whimpers against your chest trying to find some peace with your touch.
"Why are you apologizing, cowboy?" You whisper softly and caress his face, he can't look at you right now, he feel so ashamed because you're seeing him like this.
"... because— I'm a mess." His voice breaks and he holds closer to you. You just stroke his hair and kiss his forehead.
"...and my hair is ugly now." He added, a bitter chuckle follows. You take the scissors from his shaking hands and brush his hair down.
"May I fix it?" You asked before cutting anything.
"Can you?" He asks hopeless as he closes his eyes, he feels defeated, tired, he just wants to sleep but he can't sleep because of his nature.
"Well... either way I think you'll look handsome bald." You try to lighten the mood and it surprisingly works because his frown turns into a smirk. He nods and allows you to fix his hair.
You lean down to kiss his lips, a tender, slow and gentle kiss. He holds the kiss for longer, the feeling of your lips against his are a great distraction from the memories that are haunting him.
Jasper closes his eyes as you work on his hair. He doesn't know if the silence is dreadful or comfortable.
"Do you want to talk about what happened? I'm very worried about you, don't think I don't notice how distant you've been." You whisper with a serious expression.
He shakes his head slowly, the idea of discussing his feelings and pain being something he is not ready to do just yet. Your touches help in distract him.
"...maybe later, darlin', I'm sorry." Jasper whispers as he keep my eyes closed, focusing on the sensation of your fingers through his hair to avoid a relapse of his previous train of thought. He takes a couple of deep breaths as the gentle movement of your fingers helps him calm down and have a clearer mindset.
"Done." You said softly and clean his sweater from the fallen hair. You take on his image, his new look.
"You look real pretty, Jazz." You smiled, Jasper returned the smile in a much weaker way. He doesn't check himself in the mirror, he trusts you and knows you did a much better work than he did.
"....thank you, sugar." He whispers, feeling a little tired from all this. He holds your hand and kisses your palm.
"Cuddles?" You whisper back, he nods and picks you up to throw you in the bed with him.
He nuzzles his face on your neck, holding you so close to him. He takes a deep deep breath and closes his eyes.
".... you're- stuck with me forever...I'm sorry. You deserve someone better. I'm so sorry, sweetheart." He whispers against your skin.
"I'm happy to have you forever. I don't want anybody else." You whisper back and kiss the top of his head. He smiles weakly and hols you close, nuzzling to you like a needy kitten.
"...and I'm happy I got you too. I don't know who I'll be without you." Jasper closes his eyes and leaves gentle kisses on your neck.
"I love you so much." You whisper.
"I love you more." He answer with a gentle whisper.
"hmmm, I don't think so. I love you more than that." You speak teasingly, he chuckles softly and hugs you tightly.
"I love ya a hundred times that." He answers with a weak voice, like he's very sleepy.
"Well, I love you a thousand times that." You speak with a following giggle, Jasper chuckles and kisses your lips once more.
He's going to be okay. Here in your arms.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
A/N: heyyyy, here's an angsty fic because an idea came to my mind thinking about why did Jasper has such a radical haircut in between movies. And I was like "that's how you cut your hair after a breakdown." Y'know? So here's this, hope you like it, requests are open!
586 notes · View notes
nicksolemnlyswears · 9 months
Text
HAN LUE HEADCANONS PT. 2
Tumblr media Tumblr media
pairing: han lue x waitress!reader
words: 5.2k
warnings: smut
notes: there's something about that gif that drives me crazy
PT. 1 PT.3
Tumblr media
-han goes with you to get your drivers license. it's funny because in the small waiting room there's a bunch of high school students and then there's you, a twenty something year old woman without a license.
-when you walk out after the practical exam he sees your grimace. han has no trouble believing you failed, until your lips stretch into a wide smile and you pull out the plastic identification from behind your back.
-han sighs in relief, kissing your cheek and muttering an 'i knew you could do it.' if he can teach you how to drive he can teach anyone to drive.
-han adores you but he rarely lets you drive his 1997 Mazda RX-7 FD. you're not stupid you know you're a terrible driver, i mean you barely passed the exam. getting your license changes nothing, you still take the bus and train whenever han is not the one driving you. like he said, it's only for emergencies.
-han decide to race one day and begs for you to come with him in the car. you're scared shitless but agree, trusting han wouldn't let anything happen to you. you make a deal that if he wins, he gets a prize. best believe that man won for you.
-the prize? you getting the nipple piercings he suggested. you had to admit that they looked sexy on other people and you like making han happy. not that he wouldn't be if you didn't get them. he'd love you just the same.
-you researched a good piercing parlor and made the reservation. han went with you for moral support and to hold your hand. he didn't mind the piercer was male or that he got to see you topless because at the end of the day you were all his.
-you laid back on the piercing chair. your chest was heaving as you internally panicked. you wanted this but the possible pain you might feel scared you. the piercer marked your nipples, had you look in the mirror to confirm that's the placement you wanted, and had you lie back on the chair again.
han held your hand and kissed your head, "look at me, baby."
he distracted you as the piercer prepped the needle, it was better if you didn't even see the long needle.
"you can't break up with me for a year, han," you half joke out of panic. you say that because it can take up to a year for it to heal completely.
"i wasn't planning on letting you go anytime soon," he says with a half smile.
the piercer gave you a heads up he was going to start. you squeezed hans hand and squeezed your eyes shut. unintentionally you held your breath, bracing yourself for the needle piercing your skin.
"baby, breathe," han tells you, using his other hand so touch your cheek and make you react. you nod, eyes still closed and take a few breaths. "good girl."
the pain stings momentarily, decreasing in intensity in waves till it's only a dull ache. with hans assistance on preventing you from fainting, both nipples are done in no time.
the piercer leaves the room so can inspect them and make sure they're what you asked for. you stand to look at yourself in the full length mirror, han behind you, looking at you through the mirror.
they looked great, you both thought so. han comes up behind you, kissing your cheek and whispering in your ear, "worth it?"
"so far," you respond with a smile.
-han can't take his eyes away from your tits from then on. often asking you to show him. whenever you wore a shirt without a bra around the house he'd go a little feral as the studs from the piercings poked through the thin fabric.
-han has trouble falling asleep, it's one of the reasons his sleep schedule is so fucked. he's lived through a lot of crazy shit in his life and has lost people along the way. those moments tend to haunt him when he's about to sleep.
-it's gotten better ever since you started sleeping over at his apartment or viceversa. he distracts himself with you, touching your skin, rubbing soothing circles on it, the smell of your shampoo as he hugs you to his chest. having you beside him distracts him enough to fall asleep, though those thoughts resurface in his dreams.
-the memory of gisele sacrificing her life for his is one of the things that keeps han up. gisele never did anything she didn't want to do, letting go of him to protect him was her choice. it doesn't mean it hurt han any less. he is the one who has to live without her.
-gisele was one of the few women han has ever loved. she was the first woman that made him want to settle down, possibly even have a family if she wanted.
-han came to tokyo as a promise he made to himself, he'd been postponing it for long enough. he thought he'd visit along with gisele, but that was not possible any longer.
-for a time han believed he was meant to be alone, so he fell into the life of a bachelor. similar to who he was before gisele. he flirted with girls and slept around with them, accepting his fate. until he met you.
-you swept him off his feet so easily. you were like a drug he became addicted to, and he'd know how that feels, considering his past nicotine addiction.
-if gisele hadn't died, he wouldn't have met you and he wouldn't have this amazing relationship. but if she hand't died he would still be with gisele, settling down in the same city. possibly equally as happy.
-both of those futures are ones he can get on board with, but han prefers not dwelling on it and accepting that things in life happen for a reason. han would find it impossible to chose between you or gisele.
-telling you about his past means telling you about gisele. you'd be in bed early in the morning not waking up but falling asleep. he'd tell you about how he met her, what charmed him about her, and their time traveling across the world. lastly, he'd tell you about her death.
-you would never dare say it out loud but in a way you're glad she did what she did because it got you han. you have a hard time imagining what your life would be like without him since he has weaved himself into it so effortlessly.
-you're intimidated by this woman. she's everything you're not. she was a secret spy who knew how to race and fight. she's the definition of badass. and here you are, a simple waitress, wanna be chef who barely knows how to drive.
-but that's the thing about han, he doesn't have a type. as long as you're a good person (according to his standards, which are very different to a normal persons) then you have an in. he loves you so goddamn much it scares him. he loves your kindness, the fiery-ness inside of you, your beauty, you personality. yes, you could be a better driver but that's what you got him for.
-he likes that you're not involved in a life of crime and that you avoid it at all costs. he loves that he's the only danger you've accepted in your life. because it means that you're safe. it means you won't fall off of a fucking plane.
-han's apartment is way more spacious than yours, because unlike you he can afford it. because of it you spend most of your time together in his home. not many people know where he lives. in fact, it might be just you.
-it happens naturally, you don't force yourself into his life. it's han's choice to keep you around and since he's the one that drives he leaves you no choice. instead of taking you to your apartment he drives to his instead. you now have a drawer full of your things in his apartment.
-one night before you head to work you're sitting on the bed, putting on your converse. han comes out of the shower, he was dropping you off and heading to the races. he stands in front of you as he checks his phone.
-he smells like your coconut and vanilla body wash. he just stands there, a towel wrapped around his waist, water droplets falling from his hair down his chest and stomach. han is the most handsome man in the world in your eyes. his warm skin tone, his attentive eyes, and soft smiles.
-with a bite of your lip you tug on the towel, pulling him between your legs. he's invested on whatever's on his phone so he doesn't notice the mischievous look in your eyes.
-you lick a water droplet falling down his abdomen and proceed to leave open mouthed kisses all over his stomach, going lower and lower till the towel stops you.
-you don't appreciate his lack of attention so you playfully nip the taught skin of his tummy.
"ow," han complains, sending you a fake glare.
you shrug and say, "your baby needs attention."
"i think she just needs my cock," he responds, tilting his head. he throws the phone on the bed, and tilts your chin up to look at you, "is that right?"
-you nod your head and bite your lip, he lets go of your chin and signals you to go ahead. with a bright smile you undo the towel on his hips, letting it fall to the floor. you grab his cock with your soft hands and stick your tongue out to lick his length base to tip. you leave a cheeky kiss on his tip, spreading the bead of precum that formed on your pink lips.
-han watches you with hooded eyes, brushing your hair back to give him a better view. he ruts his hips when you take his length into your mouth, bobbing your head. you hold onto his thighs as you hollow your cheeks around him.
-this is equally as pleasurable for you as it is for han. having his full attention on you makes you act up, it gets your panties wet.
-a quiet groan leaves him when you dip your tongue on his slit, swirling it around his mushroomed head afterwards.
-when you take him completely in your warm mouth your nose brushes against the dark patch of hair at his base. your tight throat forces han to buck his hips, wanting to go deeper. so much so tears accumulate on your lash line.
-taking control, han grabs a tighter hold of your hair and fucks into your mouth. he closes his eyes, throwing his head back in pleasure. this is what you wanted all along, to be used by him.
-his cock is hard and warm on your mouth. throbbing with each thrust into your pretty mouth. you can still smell the scent of your body wash along with the peculiar smell of sex, it's addicting.
-han looks down at you to make sure you're doing okay. you're already looking up at him, and the sight of you might make him cum alone.
-soon he feels the familiar tightening of his balls and his pace falters. "you're going to swallow my cum, baby?" he groans out. you hum around han and it throws him over the edge. one last time he pushes into your aching mouth and releases ropes of white down your throat.
-coming off his high he lets go of your now messy hair. as you pull off his cock, a stream of saliva connects the two of you. your under eyes and lashes are wet and your mouth and nose flushed, yet this is one of the most beautiful you've ever looked. teasingly you stick out your tongue showing han you swallowed it all.
-han is shameless so grabbing his discarded phone off the bed he snaps a picture of you, his cock in frame still. in the end, han catches your puffy lips in a wet kiss. the fact you just went down on him doesn't bother him in the least.
-with a quick glance at the clock you notice you're running late for work. despite the distraction, han gets you to work on time. nothing a speeding car can't fix.
-the first big fight between you and han is intense. the two of you never fight, you might argue about petty stuff but it's nothing serious. this time around is different.
-you have taken to going out with han to the club he owns on occasion. it's a time where you both have fun, drink, dance, flirt...all normal things.
-except one day you tell han you're not going because you had promised to go out with mindy. when mindy cancels, you decide to show up in han's club to surprise him. you knew he was there, seeing the orange mazda parked by the entrance.
-you go in, excited to spend time with him. you walk past the first area into the empty hallway and into the other room where han tends to hangout.
-you weave through the crowd of dancing people and spot him by the bar. you're about to call out to him when you notice two girls by his sides as he talks to a guy you don't know.
-you really try not to let it bother you but when one of the women starts whispering in his ear and you see him nodding to her words as she touches his chest, you loose it.
-tears burn your eyes, not out of sadness but out of frustration. is this what he does when you can't make it? good to know he finds a way to keep himself entertained.
-han sees you as you glare at him and turn to leave the stuffy place. at first he doesn't catch why you're glaring at him. he instantly follows you and only manages to catch up to you outside.
"baby, where are you going?"
"home," you spit angrily, continuing to walk, "have fun with your whores."
"what are you on about?" han asks, jogging to catch up to you.
you turn back on your heels and stare at him in disbelief, "what am i on about? i was excited to come here and spend time with you and instead i find you wrapped around two fake blondes whispering in your ear. its real reassuring to know you have company when i'm not around," you scream angrily, tears threatening to spill. you didn't want to cry, but your frustration couldn't be contained.
"baby, it's nothing, and nothing was going to happen," han reassures you, sighing in disbelief that you're angry about this.
"i have a hard time believing that," you scoff, rolling your eyes and looking away from him.
"why are you so jealous? i've never given you a reason to. hell, i spend all my time with you!" han argues, begging for you to look at him. he's getting angry as well at the fact you're acting so distrusting.
"god, han how do you want me to feel when i see you around them, huh? you want me to smile and let them be all over you? please, don't embarrass me that way," you exclaim, tears starting to roll down.
"i want you to understand that it's not what you think and that they are friends of mine. i love you, i would never even think of cheating on you," han says. he hates seeing you cry and he wants to go over to you and wipe your tears away but you're being unreasonable.
"and they probably don't know about me either, right? i know you like keeping your secrets," you sniff. it took sean and twinkie months to learn you even existed.
hans stays quiet, letting her know all she needs to. "right," you scoff. you wipe tear after tear away but they continue to fall. turning around you go out into the street to get a taxi.
"it's not because i don't want to. i do it to protect you," he says exasperated, "stop running away from the argument!" han calls out your name, something he rarely does. this is serious. "it's not fair."
"what isn't?" you ask, waiting for a taxi to make an appearance.
"that you don't trust me," han speaks from behind her, "i trust you completely, i don't question you when you go out with your friends."
"that's because i don't let random men all over me!" you yell again, refusing to apologize.
"they aren't random girls, they are friends. fuck, they even have boyfriends!" han screams back at you. it's the first time he raises his voice at you. he's equally as frustrated at you are.
-he doesn't even understand how the night ended up like this, screaming in the streets of tokyo. there's very few people that can make him blow up like that and he hates it.
"whatever, han," a taxi eventually pulls up and you get in it, leaving han behind.
-the next night han doesn't go over to the diner, but he does wait till you finish your shift, preferring to drive you home. the fight might've been bad but not bad enough where he'll let you go back to walking alone in the middle of the night. he still loves you after all.
-the drive is quiet and long, he's not speeding like he usually does. he's giving you time to speak or apologize but nothing comes so he plays along. the same cycle repeats for the following days, neither wants to apologize and neither wants to terminate the relationship.
-by the sixth day you're over it, you miss han, you miss his attention, his touches, his voice even. you admit you overreacted. you personally blame it on hormonal mood swings, because the following day you got your period.
-he picks you up as usual, without a word. you get into his car and try to think about what to say. you really hope you haven't ruined your relationship.
-han hears a sniffle and turns to see you trying to hold back tears.
"hey hey hey, are you okay? did something happen?" he asks softly, finding somewhere to park. he's worried something bad happened at work.
"i'm so stupid, han. please, i'm sorry," you cry, "the other night i just got so jealous. i do trust you. please, forgive me."
it feels like a weight has been lifted off his shoulders, han can breathe properly again. "baby, i'm sorry too. i never realized how you would feel seeing me like that with others even if they are just my friends."
"i missed you," you tell him, looking into his eyes.
"i missed you, more," he responds with a soft smile.
with a trembling bottom lip, you throw yourself over the middle console to hug him. he hugs you back just as tightly, kissing your head.
"lets go home," han says.
-you guys are an adventurous couple. you find ways to spice up your sex lives on the daily. han likes to tease you...a lot. if you were going to the club, or on a date, or just drive around he'd challenge you to try to cum before you arrive at your destination.
-you accept each and every time. proping one leg on the dash of hans car (you're the only one allowed) you lift your skirt or dress up your hips and slide a hand in between your legs.
-you moan and whine are you circle your clit and dip a finger into your pussy. meanwhile han races through the streets of tokyo to prevent you from reaching your peak.
"han, i need you," you moan over the sounds of your wet center. "hannie, please." to distract him even further you push away the straps of your dress, letting it fall down to your waist, revealing your chest.
-han only spares you a glance, his pants tightening instantly at your exposed state. you clearly knows his weakness. han presses harder on the pedal to go faster.
"han, baby, i'm so close," you release a high pitched moan. your movements quicken only for your hand to be stopped by your boyfriend.
-somewhere along the way you had closed your eyes. han won this time around, having arrived at your destination.
"maybe next time, baby," han smirks, fixing the top of your dress before anyone sees you, giving your boobs a little squeeze along the way.
you sigh in frustration, letting your foot fall from the dash and closing your legs in a more appropriate manner.
"i never win this game," you huff, opening the door of the humid car.
-because han is so laid back you like to act like a brat to mess with him. i'm talking bending down in front of him, showing him your underwear or lack there of, rubbing yourself against him while you dance, or whispering dirty things in his ear while he talks to his friends.
-he'd be cool, unbothered, trying his best to ignore you until you're left alone for a second. if you're walking in front of him he'd gently pull your hair, bringing your head back as he whispers in your ear, "keep acting like that and see what happens." then han would walk off, pulling you behind him as if he didn't just soak your panties.
-in time, takashi learns about you and meets you. it's a consequence of getting more involved in han's life. he low key likes you in a friendly way. you act laid back in a similar matter to han. most importantly you don't meddle with things that don't concern you, if he has to talk business with han you're the first one to stand up and go. you're just not interested, the less you know the better. if it were up to han he wouldn't let you go, preferring to have you by his side.
-whenever he goes around han's club takashi always says hello and even buys you drinks. he likes you because you're not a foreigner unlike sean or twinkie or even han.
-surprisingly what makes you click with takashi is food recommendations. yes, the intimidating DK has great restaurant's to recommend.
-terrible news come when you find out the diner is closing. the entire staff was called in for a meeting during the day. you didn't think much of it, believing it would be a change of ownership as it's happened in the past.
-when the owner announces that they are closing from that day forward, you panic. this is your job without it you have no income. you take your time before you return to a sleeping han. you had to think and come up with a solution soon.
-back in the apartment you enter quietly knowing han is probably still asleep. you take off your shoes and trudge over to the bed, falling on it gently.
-you take in han as he sleeps peacefully, he likes to sleep on his stomach, hugging your waist, but if you're not there then a pillow will take your place, like now.
-for the most part he sleeps shirtless, because he gets hot at night. you begin tracing your fingers over his back softly, almost tickling him. han starts waking up because of your touch.
-you tell him all about the diner closing in whispers, feeling safe and calm in the confines of the bedroom. he listens quietly as you process your thought out loud. he lies back on the pillows with you pressed against his chest, tracing shapes with your fingers over his skin.
"what's the plan now?" han asks. his hand under your shirt, rubbing your back.
"find another job. tokyo is big, i'm bound to find something quickly," you shrug, pressing a kiss to his chest. it's been a long afternoon of nothing. just resting in bed and spending time with han.
"what about your dream?" he wonders.
"which one?" you giggle, knowing you talk a lot of hopes and dreams.
"becoming a chef, opening up a restaurant..." han reminds you, glancing at your face.
"it's a dream, hannie. i can barely afford my apartment right now, i can't open a restaurant," you say disappointed. owning a restaurant will never be possible for you.
"you have me, let me help you," han hums casually as if he just offered to buy you a drink at a bar.
"i can't ask that of you, han. it's too much money," you instantly refuse, propping yourself up to stare at your boyfriend.
"i want to help you, baby. i've tasted your cooking and it's one of the best things i've tried in my life. i believe in your dream," han mentions, tucking a piece of hair behind your ear.
"i don't know," you say unsure, tilting your head as you overthink things. you don't want han to believe you're with him for his money.
"see it this way. i'll be your investor, when the time comes you'll buy me out," he offers an alternative, knowing that otherwise you wouldn't agree.
"are you sure?" you ask once again.
"i am," he nods, pecking your pouty lips.
"i don't deserve you," you say as a smile breaks out from your lips.
-you get to work quickly on the restaurant of your dreams because time is money and you're serious about this. this is not another project you can start and leave half way through.
-you end up buying out the space the diner used to be at. since the owner knows you, he didn't totally screw you over.
-having the space and working with architects and designers for the interior of it. you're left to work on the menu. you don't want it to be one menu for the next three years, you want it to change with the seasons and the produce that's available at those times. you want it all to be as fresh as possible.
-han takes the back seat on the whole restaurant thing, trusting you know what you're doing. he opens up an account for the restaurant where you can dip in for whatever you need.
-with the restaurant under renovation you spend your time in the kitchen, working on the menu for the opening. han would be generous enough to help you with the dishes and being a taste tester. he hates to admit he’s gained a few pounds but you love it.
-with the sudden change in your schedule you're actually sleeping at night and working during the day. but you and han make it work despite your different sleep schedules.
-han is the type of boyfriend to kiss your head whenever he has to leave and you're asleep. he does the same when he comes back late at night and cuddles up to you. just a quick peck on your forehead.
-you like when he does it, since it lets you know he's back home safe and sound. you always lift up the sheets so he can het closer to your body and spoon you.
-han gets you a pair of very expensive Opyum YSL high heels for your birthday. it's a very indulgent present, because he got them to feed into his kink of fucking you with heels on.
-one year and half into your relationship han asks you to move in with him. you barely spend time at yours anyway, if you do go there it's to do laundry. you agree but not before you have a long conversation as to what this relationship means to the two of you.
"hannie, i need to know. where do you see this relationship going?" han means the world to you and you see a future with him. you'd love to get married and have kids in the next ten years. you know you haven't been very long with him but it's something that's better to discuss now.
han takes a minute to respond as he gathers his thoughts but his answer is confident, "i don't care where it goes as long as i'm with you." whatever you want he will give you. a big wedding, small wedding, eloping, live together.
-you smile at his answer and continue to talk about your future together. you learn he wants children, two of them to be precise. in the past he didn't want any, yet as he grew older and some of his friends had children of their own he realized it wouldn't be a bad thing at all.
-han isn't one to listen to a ton of music, he doesn't have a preference either. unlike some people he likes listening to his thoughts. you on the other hand always have music blasting. since you two live together han is somewhat forced to listen to whatever you are listening to. as long as it makes you happy he endures it.
-han starts memorizing and vibing to your music in no time. often times you'll find him singing under his breath. if you leave an album in his car he might even listen to it. out of all the music you listen to he likes girl groups the most and will even go to concerts with you.
-han doesn't smoke cigarettes anymore, he hasn't in a long time but he has indulged in smoking weed on occasion. one calm night you're home, watching tv and han asks if you mind. you don't as long as he shares.
-you were asthmatic as a child and try not to be around smokers much but you'd lie if you hadn't tried smoking both weed and cigarettes in your college years.
-weed is highly illegal in japan, but han has contacts so buying it was a piece of cake. he rolls it himself, impressing you with his abilities. you sit on his lap as you pass the joint between the two of you.
-han blows rings into the air, making you giggle. some things he can't forget like the silly tricks or the burn in his lungs. you cough for the first few puff's and he thinks you're cute.
-you forgot weed made you horny so an hour and a half later you find yourself straddling han’s lap, kissing him. the taste of weed on both your tongues. you roll your hips against him, your panties soaked, getting his pants wet.
-han gets lazy when he's high so he lets you do as you please. getting it up is not a problem. discarding your underwear and undoing hans pants you ride his hard cock slowly. you relish having him deep inside of you.
-you throw your head back in pleasure and he lifts your t shirt to take one nipple into his mouth, playing with the metal bar adorning it. getting the piercing made you so much more sensitive to nipple stimulation.
-han watches you. your face scrunched in pleasure as you grind your hips against him. he lives for the show, your sweat shining pretty under the lights.
-you're on the shorter side so han is always taking things down from the cabinets for you. he lets you struggle first though seeing your as your skirt rising up, exposing your body to his eyes. han could keep his stuff on the lower shelves but he likes to feel needed by you.
-just as he is observant with others han reads you like a book. he knows what you’re feeling before you figure it out yourself, including what you feel in bed. he knows when you’re gonna cum before you do. your body gives him all the indication he needs.
pt.3
im also accepting requests!
if you’d like me to tag you let me know!
Tumblr media
y’all don’t know how much i love this gif. i'm an idiot that thinks he’s so fucking cool. the flipping of the bag is nothing out of this world and here i am, swooning over it.
Tumblr media
718 notes · View notes
anakinsdove · 1 month
Text
𝐦𝐚𝐠𝐢𝐜 𝐦𝐞 | 𝐚𝐧𝐚𝐤𝐢𝐧 𝐬𝐤𝐲𝐰𝐚𝐥𝐤𝐞𝐫
pairing: anakin skywalker x fem!reader
summary: you and anakin arranged a date in your apartment tonight… yes like a normal couple.
c/w: fluff, (and a little bit angsty) ani is in love and so are you, dates dates dates, movie night.
discord - twitter: anakinsdove
Tumblr media Tumblr media
𝐫𝐞𝐪𝐮𝐞𝐬𝐭𝐬 𝐚𝐫𝐞 𝐨𝐩𝐞𝐧! 。゚゚・。・゚゚。 ゚。Love you
𝘄/𝗰 - 2,819
“So you’re free tonight right?” “Yes” Anakin confirms for the millionth time today… it’s not your fault tho, you just wanna make sure this evening goes exactly as planned, it’s not every night you can arrange a date with your boyfriend though it’s exactly what you and him want, but after all, you’re not a normal couple, he’s a Jedi and not to mention dating it’s forbidden for Jedis, he’s also very busy… you pull at his hair excitedly and he hisses a little. “Wait! What movie are we watching?” You ask, and he nuzzles his face in your chest “Not Bribery” “Is that the one about the alien that-” “Yes that one” “It’s a good movie though” “Of course it’s not” your eyes widen at his disrespect…
“I can’t believe you actually said that” “it’s true” you grumble quietly and he chuckles… his eyes remain closed when he suddenly hears his communicator beeping “Is that-” he groans and answers
“Anakin, you must’ve report to the temple immediately” it’s obi wan “Be right there master” there’s clearly annoyance in his voice, and his heart sinks at your disappointed expression written all over your pretty face… “Hey… the sooner I go the sooner I’ll be back okay?” You can only nod already accepting that the date night is already canceled, you think it’s really selfish wanting to keep him all to yourself, after all he’s a Jedi, he saves lives, he does it for the republic, he does it everyday, why can’t you have him for a couple of hours?
“Look love… don’t worry, you go and get yourself all dolled up, I promise the date isn’t cancelled okay?” You can only hope it’s true… you think it’ll be more painful to get yourself ready and having to take your pretty dress off, make up and hairstyle, later when he never shows up than to accept it now, but he’s making you a promise and he will keep it
“I’ll be waiting” you say and kiss his cheek, he grins at this and closes the door and hear from the other side “I’ll be here at 9:00” you nod forgetting he can’t see you…
5:45 PM
There’s a lot left to do, but where to start? Is the real question, you decide to start with cleaning around a little bit, you move the couch only to find Anakin’s beanie you knitted for him Anakin you grumbled angrily “It’s in my drawer I’m sure” he said a while ago when you questioned him why he didn’t wear it anymore… a few minutes later everything is done and the next step is to start dolling yourself up, you want this to be special and none of your dresses seem to match your expectation… too pink, too red, too elegant, too informal, wrong print? too short? I don’t think that would bother Anakin at all but it bothers you for some reason, it’s like your first date all over again, the butterflies, the anxiety and the unbelievable excitement… it was a great date, considering his padawan braid got stuck in your necklace, you cringe at the memory.
After what feels like an eternity you pick a dress… it’s beautiful purple and it has the “right” length, deciding to ignore the complete disaster you made in your closet, buuuuut now… your nails don’t match the stupid dress! Trying to grab your pretty lilac nail polish a knocking the rest of your make up over, you gasp when you hear your eyeshadow palette breaking and see pigment on the ground “oh no” the sadness in your voice equals to a kicked puppy, you kneel on the ground to dust it away.. it was your favorite palette, the pretty and expensive one, whimpering when you throw it in the trash.
Now you’re painting your nails sad and not even doing it right, there’s nail polish all over your fingers… what the fuck? The shower will take care of it
7:09 PM
Fuck! Everything it’s taking longer than usual, you haven’t even showered yet!
You undress yourself and get in a little bit too quick, the water is still cold, it makes you wince, but there’s not enough time and Anakin said he would be here at 9:00… your makeup, take out, your outfit, the candles? It’s not that you can’t do anything right it’s just that the excitement bubble you feel in your stomach betrays you and turns into anxiety. He would be happy to spend an evening with you in the sand just to be by your side, Anakin wouldn’t notice the small details that make you pull your hair, or maybe he would and wouldn’t even care, or maybe he would care-
8:54 PM
The rest of your routine goes slightly more smoothly, everything is set and now you’re just waiting for Anakin to arrive, you sigh and pray that everything goes as planned from now on.
9:01
9:07
9:15
9:23
9:28
Since when is your couch so big? And why do you feel the clock is ticking too loud for your liking? Your dress feels so tight and then is inevitable… You feel the familiar sensation of tears welling up in your eyes “You think it’ll be more painful to get yourself ready and having to take your pretty dress off, make up and hairstyle, later when he never shows up than to accept it now, but he’s making you a promise and he will keep it”
But then there’s an urgent knocking on your door, one that you could’ve never mistake, the kind of knocking that wants to take the stupid door down and your practically jump from the couch and sprint towards the door, opening it with shaky hands… And there he is… he’s frowning and gripping the bouquet of flowers in his hands anxiously, already damaging the wrapper that holds it together. “Y/n” he says breathlessly and he immediately stops when he notices the tears in your eyes.
Your eyes switch to his face to his eyes lips then the bouquet, taking all of him so you can remember this later, his robes are muddy “Ani-" he places the flowers at a nearby table and instantly takes your face in his hands “What’s the matter doll?” He asks and wipes your tears away.. it actually makes you melt.
“I thought you weren’t coming” Your voice comes out small and you feel a little sad for not trusting him from the begging, he promised he would be here and here he is…. “I’m sorry for being so late Y/N I- the mission was- it’s not important” “Are you okay?” You ask, he gives you a small smile and nods “Everything is alright, everyone as well” you sigh in relief “That’s good my love, congrats” you hug him, he’s still sad at the sight of your dried tears on your cheeks, but at least your mascara is still intact.
“You sure that’s all?” Your grip around him tightens as you hide your face in the crook of his neck, suddenly your struggles from earlier don’t seem like a big deal after his own deal being a Jedi is responsibility aswell. “I almost messed up our date?” “Huh? And why’s that love?” And you finally look up at him “I dunno… it’s silly”
“It can’t be silly if it bothered you enough to make you cry” you want to argue and say It is but he might be right and you don’t know better “First I found out you did loose the scarf I made you-” “Where is it!?” He asks excitedly “Then I didn’t like any of my dresses… it took me forever, then my nails wouldn’t match my dress and I dropped my eyeshadow palette-“ “The pretty one with the pink tones?” “Yes, that one” “Aw, I’m sorry doll” “It’s okay… then I got in the shower and the water was freezing and then you wouldn’t show up!” Anakin cringes at the last part and you continue “I-I’m sorry, all of this sounds really stupid compared to any kind of problem you face daily as Jedi-” “Normal” “Huh?” “Your problems are… are normal… I like normal” “Oh… You do?” “Of course Y/N… after dealing with the war everyday and the council… this, this is exactly what I need” you chuckle “Well it’s always a pleasure to be ordinary enough for you” “I didn’t mean it like that-” “I know” you giggle… “I wish our life would be this domestic sometimes, can you imagine? You, me and two little mini you running around the house?” Children… he’s thinking about children, that gives you a reality check, any silly doubt you might have about your relationship is gone just like that because he’s actually dreaming about a life with you, and you wouldn’t prefer any different.
“I would love that” you say sincerely… “They would have your eyes and my hair…. Your eyebrows” He traces them delicately “And maybe my personality, one each” that makes you beam “I can’t wait” “Me neither” He takes your face in his hands and kisses you sweetly… it’s nice and delicate, he hums in the kiss and takes the chance to slide his tongue in his mouth, you suck at it softly and after a few seconds you pull away only to find the completely head over heels gaze he’s giving you.
“You’re all muddy” you say “I didn’t see the hole in the ground-” you shake your head in disbelief and take his hand in yours to guide him to your bathroom “It was Obi wan’s fault!” Now.. how could that possibly be Obi wan’s fault? But you let him ramble. “Undress” you say
“Oh you would’ve loved that wouldn’t you?” he teases and you punch him in the shoulder jokingly. He starts taking his robes off while you start filling the tub, the water is warm this time and you pour a little of your lavander soap in “Hey i thought you wanted a show” he says teasingly, because you made him undress and you didn’t even watch… that’s a shame honestly. “Get in baby” he can’t resist you or a warm bath when needed.
The water is instantly soothing for his aching muscles… he groans and tilts his head back, opening his eyes to find you looking at him adoringly “Thank you my love” he says and you lean in to kiss his cheek “You’re very welcome Ani” you throw him your old rubber duck in he laughs, he closes his eyes and sighs, he couldn’t ask for anything better in life… his eyes remain closed for a few seconds “C’mon Baby don’t pass out… you could’ve drown” “Mmm I know you wouldn’t let me” “Don’t be so sure” he opens his eyes wide and you cackled. “Close your eyes” you say “Make up your mind” he teases but does as you say, You take a small recipient with warm water and pour it over his head, gently soaking his curls, he tilts his head forward like a child, then you pour some of the apple shampoo on your hand, you figured out he liked the scent and you start gently massaging his scalp and smile when you see bubbles, his eyes peaked open to look at your loving and concentrating expression, he’s melting but when your nails escaped along his scalp he purrs… the night goes on and when you’re done washing his hair and his bubble bath is over he turns the shower on to wash his body… you wait for him with a fluffy bath towel, he smiles when he sees you and he wraps himself in it.
He follows you into your bedroom where he find a pair of his sweatpants he keeps in here, the sweater you knitted for him, a pair of your fluffy socks and clean boxers, he gives you a grateful smile… when he’s done he wraps his arms around you and you lean on him as he rubs your back “You’re a little tense hun” “Whaaat? No I’m” “Lay down” you look up at him with puppy eyes “Lay down on your stomach c’mon” And who are you to complain when Anakin Skywalker gives an order.
You lay down on the bed and he takes your heels off and kisses up your calf, and okay you weren’t completely lying, you’re still not completely sure you’re actually tense and that Anakin only wants an excuse to touch you, but his touch already feels amazing… “M’sorry I didn’t say it earlier but you look absolutely beautiful, every single detail about you is perfect” that means a lot to you “Thank you… You’re So Perfect-” he starts kissing down you back covering your spine with kisses, his hands find the zip or your dress “Gonna unzip your dress okay? I’m gonna take it off” “Yeah” you say already agreeing with anything he says, he chuckles, his hand unzips your dress nice and slow while his eyes trace every detail of your back… moles, marks, tattoos, anything… wait that looks like a constellation… he takes the dress off leaving you only in your bra and panties “This too” he pulls at your bra and you roll your eyes not annoyed at all “alright” he instantly unclasps your bra and you lift yourself so he can take it off, his touch is gentle when he slides the straps down your shoulders… his gaze lingers on your chest and you giggle “My massage” “Oh! Right” He pushes your on your stomach again, his hands dig into your shoulder blades and you make a little sound when his metal hand touches your back, it’s cold and it feels good for some reason “There’s a knot here” he says and pushes deeper to massage your skin, you moan and his ears perk up at the sound but he pushes those thoughts to the back of his head for your own sake and his “Ani… that feels really good” “I know” he says cockily and keeps working his magic, suddenly his hands grip your ass and you gasp “You’re tense here too” he massages the skin and you actually think you’re muscles are grateful… the feeling want to make your thighs squeeze Not now You think.
10 minutes later he’s done and you’re actually sleepy, he takes one of your sweaters out of your drawer and you try to put it on but he does it for you, unfortunately his hand tickles your ribs and you giggle, he looked at you with pure adoration in his eyes… “Would you like to watch a movie” he kisses your neck and you close your eyes “Sure!” You beam, “Okay… I’ll make the pop corn” he keeps kissing you and you think he might never stop and make the damn pop corn, though you’re not sure you want him to stop you whimper and your breathing heaves “I’ll go now… promise” however he keeps kissing you and you take the chance to tickle his ribs, he cackles and takes the queue to leave.
You realize you still have makeup on your face and you curse at yourself, feeling lazy to take it off but going to the bathroom and washing your face no matter how much you wanna eat pop corn and get into his arms you want.. he comes back 5 minutes later with the bowl of pop corn and two drinks… you beam at the sight of snacks and he chuckles “Are you happy to see me or the popcorn?” “Both”
“We’re watching Bribery” you say simply “Whatever” he says clearly not happy with your choice but happier nonetheless to be here, he thinks it’s cute how much you like this shitty movie… you nuzzle into his arms and 40 minutes later you’re starting to fall asleep.
“It’s time to sleep love” “Nuh uh” you say with your eyes already closed “What why not?” He asks curiously, your body says otherwise
“You still haven’t fucked me, date night it’s not over” you say boldly and he cackles
“It’s alright love, I’ll promise I’ll fuck you in the morning”
“Promise?”
“Promise”
He stays up for a little after you fell asleep, admiring your features and tracing them gently with his knuckle, careful to not harm you, to not wake you up or disturb you in any way “I love you… more than anything in the entire universe…” something sparked inside him watching your sleep so vulnerable and with your guard completely down, trusting him completely.. “And I would never let something bad happen to you…” he kisses your forehead and stares at you with pure adoration in his eyes… he truly loves you… he tries to find a word bigger than that to state his love for you but the sleepiness is finally getting to him too…
“G’night” he mutters and lastly kisses your nose.
masterslist 𝗮𝗻𝗮𝗸𝗶𝗻𝘀𝗱𝗼𝘃𝗲 © --- all rights reserved. no reposting/translating/ copying will be tolerated.
dividers- @i92-93
232 notes · View notes
cillivnz · 2 months
Text
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
SEX CHAMBER — THE DIMITRESCU BOYS [HEADCANNONS]
Tumblr media
pairings. dimitrescu boys x f!reader [individual and foursome]
warnings. dubcon. nsfw. 18+. double/triple penetration, anal sex & vaginal sex, anal & vaginal fingering, squirting, forced orgasms, biting, mentions of cannibalism, blood-play, vampiric themes, overstimulation, breast-play, oral sex (m! & f!), stockholm syndrome (kinda).
a/n. requested! thank you for this ask, it’s been a common request, and i will be writing fan-fiction for these guys, too, but in different verses, not the preexisting ones!
Tumblr media
the dimitrescu boys who adore you— their perfect little whore, so compliant and ready to take cock in whichever hole they choose. your pretty cries and sobs while those monster cocks absolutely obliterate you, showing no mercy to your gummy walls and virgin asshole.
Tumblr media
Boian Dimitrescu, oldest of the three, silent and stoic, but determined to rearrange your insides. he hardly made a sound while thrusting into your pussy, only grunting when you’d clench unnecessarily around him, seriously, you’d think you would’ve adjusted to their size after fucking daily— day and night, but the cunt remains tight as ever, partly why the brothers are adamant on having you for breakfast and breaking your back for dinner. his long blonde hair falls over your shoulders when he’s thrusting from behind. complaining about you being a “hostile cunt”, nonetheless fucking every inch of that long, girthy cock into your abused cunt. as the oldest, it’s him that penetrates you first, even if it’s his younger siblings that have repeatedly made you squirt and gush over their tongues prior, but the first cock to enter you will always be Boian’s, it goes without saying. if it’s the next brother, then he’ll only argue with him over you, possessive as ever, taking his agitation out on your gaping hole(s), not giving you any attention while his dick pays you all the heed in the world. he loves spoiling you, wordlessly. if he gives any aftercare, it’s silently pulling your limp body closer to his, letting you use his toned chest as a pillow and sleep.
Cătălin Dimitrescu, middle child, this sadist would fuck you without prepping, and not just your pussy, this son of a bitch would fuck both your holes dry, enjoying the burn (though his cock would be wet enough from the forceful fellatio he’s coaxed out of your plump lips). he enjoyed kills the most, those cannibalistic ventures were the only shenanigans that would bring him as much joy as your cunt does. yeah, they all need blood to survive, but this one treats it like a luxury that only he, and he can afford. he’ll fuck you missionary, to stare at that pretty face contorting in pain and also to watch your cunt squeeze in and out his extreme length. not as girthy as his brother, but definitely on the longer side, punching your cervix is like a walk in the park for him. he’ll bite your neck, the supple flesh above your breasts and leave marks, licking the trickling blood, savouring the ferric tanginess. definitely the most vocal while fucking. doesn’t hide his own moans neither his admiration for how the sole purpose of your existence was to take dick like a champ. “good girl”, “don’t you dare run away from me”, “like that? harder? no? *proceeds to pound into your abused pussy*”. eats pussy like a starving man, “ugh, so thirsty,” whines while enclosing your squirting hole in an open-mouthed kiss. is the first one to get horny and bring his brothers to fuck you. doesn’t actually prep you, but his constant selfish stimulation of your cunt gets you about ready for others. raven hair all shaggy and wet from the amount of times he’s made you squirt on his face.
and Dorin Dimitrescu, the youngest and most delusional of all, because he actually thinks you’ll make a great wife, despite his brothers’ cum residing in every hole of yours in front of him, every day. so what if you’re not just a whore for him? he’s not a good man. he gives you pain just like Cătălin, but he wordlessly looks after your needs like Boian, too. “you’re so mean,” when you refuse to open wide for his cock to be shoved down your throat, or, “good, now harder,” when you’re trying to bounce on his cock while he’s pinching your clit. “i get thirsty, too, understand?” he says, pushing his brother’s face away from your bleeding breasts, trying to make you understand that he is not a sadist like him, but can’t not relish in your taste when you’re laid out so perfectly for him. “try something new?” he was the one who introduced anal, and you don’t know whether to curse him for leaving your hole gaping every night, or make love to him by letting him have his way. you feel chestnut brown hair tickling your back when he kisses your spine, fingering your ass while the tip of his cock prods at your swollen folds.
Tumblr media
the dimitrescu boys who’ve hidden you from the eyes of their father, knowing he won’t hesitate to keep something as beautiful as you for his own pleasure the minute he’s aware of your existence.
the dimitrescu boys who’ve locked you away in the dungeons, usually chained in such a position that it’s easy for them to enter, enter you, cum inside you, and leave, while you’re still splayed out for the next brother to come and have his way.
the dimitrescu brothers who’ve provided you with more riches you’ve had as a poor farmer’s daughter, in the warmth of their abode in exchange of them inside your warmth.
the dimitrescu brothers who look forward to the days and nights ahead of them, only because they get to fuck you.
the dimitrescu brothers who’ve impressed their father with their new ability to care and share, credits to you and your body.
the dimitrescu boys who love you, simply because you’re the one one fucked up enough to love them back.
Tumblr media
main masterlist. more from ‘resident evil: village’. blog navigatory.
100 notes · View notes
brigdh · 6 months
Text
Ed and the mortifying ordeal of being known
Ed does not like revealing his feelings. He is incredibly consistent about lying,
Tumblr media
hiding
Tumblr media
displacing,
Tumblr media
distracting, or just outright denying what he's feeling instead of actually talking about it. This is a consistent pattern of behavior with him. There are a few exceptions – most significantly, I think, the bathtub scene where he confesses to Stede about killing his father – but they are a) rare, and b) occur under unusual circumstances, such as a PTSD flashback. In general Ed goes to great lengths to prevent people from recognizing the truth about him.
I don't really blame Ed for this habit, to be clear. He went through an abusive childhood, and though we don't see a lot of the exact dynamics in baby Ed's house, it's very common for abused children to become hyper vigilant of both their own and others' emotions. It's an attempt to exert some, any control they can over the situation, as though they can prevent setting off the abuser if they just always say and do the right thing.
Ed escaped into piracy, but in terms of talking about his feelings, I don't think it was much of an escape. Piracy in OFMD seems to be a place where the idea of having friends (though not the reality – I'd argue Ed might not use the word 'friend', but has had close relationships) is to be scoffed at. "We're all just in various stages of fucking each other over!" says Calico Jack, and being open about your emotions, plans, hopes, etc would just make it all the easier to be betrayed. On the other hand, lying, obfuscating, or just telling everyone about Plan A and then instead pulling off Plan B makes you look like a double-crossing genius who outthought everyone around you. So I'm not surprised that's Ed's learned to be manipulative and uncommunicative. I don't think he's ever been in a situation where emotional openness wouldn't be a disadvantage.
Regardless of why he does this, it's very clear that it's a pattern of behavior for him. This is one reason why I don't think Sad Robe Ed back in Episode 10 was healing – healing requires addressing and dealing with your feelings, and Ed was very much not doing that. I've already written a whole post going through that episode and laying out how Ed never once mentions Stede, or love, or heartbreak, or anything related to what he's going through, so I'm not going to do it again here. In brief, Ed's putting on a performance of sadness for the crew, but it's a generic, vague sort of sadness, without any connection to his personal, specific pain.
Who finally brings up Stede in Ep 10? It's sure not Ed. Izzy:
Tumblr media
Which brings us to Season Two. How is Ed doing now?
He's once again making a performance of his pain, and once again keeping it vague, not letting any of his true, personal hurts be revealed.
These:
Tumblr media Tumblr media
Are performances of his pain and sadness, but just like before, they're generic, unspecific. This is "Mad Devil Pyrate Blackbeard", not heartbroken, human Ed. Who is it that brings up the private reality of what's causing this toxic atmosphere? Once again, not Ed. It's Izzy, just like before. And this time he gets shot immediately for saying Stede's name, and Ed doesn't even look at him.
Tumblr media
In all three episodes, Ed mentions Stede directly only once, and very pointedly, it's when he's alone:
Tumblr media
I'm glad Ed has decided that he wants to live, but that's the beginning of a journey, not the end. What I really want to see in the next couple of episodes is Ed finally, for once, opening up. He doesn't want to be vulnerable, but the lack of emotional intimacy that constantly lying and performing has gotten him is, quite literally, killing him.
Ed can't get over his own, very real pain until he's willing to admit that it exists. I want to see him acknowledge where he hurts. He needs friends. He needs love. He can't get those without being honest.
I hope he does. I hope the show will have him do this work instead of skipping him ahead immediately to the happy ending, no behavioral change required. I think they will. It's kind of their motto, after all: talk it through as a crew.
Now if the co-captains would just follow their own advice...
210 notes · View notes
bonny-kookoo · 7 months
Text
Jungkook
𝐑𝐚𝐦𝐩𝐚𝐠𝐞 [Part 2: New Life]
Tumblr media
Some feelings that you think you've never felt might just be buried beneath the things you've been trying to forget.
General Tags/Warnings: Mafia!Tiger!Jungkook, Deer!Reader, somewhat dark romance, Crime, Blood & Violence, angst, fluff?, Rollercoaster of emotions TM, Angst, Injury?, Death (of a minor character), murder out of self-defense, gun violence, mentioned torture, do I sense some.. fluff??
Length: ~5k words.
There is no taglist for this fic.
-> Masterlist
⋅ ⋅ ── ⋅ ⋅ ── ⋅ ⋅ ── ⋅ ⋅ ── ⋅ ⋅ ── ⋅ ⋅ ── ⋅ ⋅ ── ⋅ ⋅ ── ⋅ ⋅
"Going short now?" Namjoon comments a bit teasingly, as Jungkook enters the kitchen downstairs, where most are currently busy eating breakfast-except you.
"It bothered me." He mumbles. "Did she already have breakfast?" He wonders towards Hoseok, who shrugs.
"She wanted to go to check out the books in the second office. Yoongi said I should let her." He defends himself, and Jungkook nods, though he's not happy.
"I still would like for at least someone to stay close to her." He says, filling one cup with coffee, and the other one with tea.
Two sugars, the same you always liked it. Do you still like it that way now?
He opens the door with his elbow, quietly as he can, spotting you near the windows with numerous books placed on the windowsill, your legs pulled close, cheek resting on your knees as you read. Your ears twitch towards him, but it's clear that you no longer fear him after a few days of living here now.
That's good. He likes that development.
The door closes, and you look towards him now, watching how he walks closer, placing the two cups on the small coffee table nearby, before he sits down on the leather sofa near the window where you sit. "Reading?" He wonders, but you shake your head, moving to walk closer, placing the book opened on the table.
It's a fable. He didn't even know he still had this book.
"Can't read it, huh." He mumbles, pulling the book closer, before he pats the spot next to him once to invite you to sit- which you do, watching how he closes it, inspects it's roughed down edges, before he opens it again. He sighs, leans back, holds the book against the leg he's got thrown over the other, to show you the pictures accompanying the story. "Basically.. Alright. So, there was a king, and he got pretty fucking sick." He explains, and you slowly move your legs up, naked feet now on the sofa as you lean against Jungkook, first actual physical contact you both have-
ever since he left you.
"No one had a clue why, until one of the healers got the stupid idea that a rabbit's liver would heal the guy." He simplifies the story in his rather rough words, but you listen regardless, studying the imagery in the book. "So, the king asked his minions who'd go up to the surface and get a rabbit down under the sea." Jungkook goes on, looking at you for a second. "But most of them were cowards, and didn't dare go up onto the surface." He tells you further, before shrugging, looking back at the pages. "Granted, how would a whale or a squid walk on land, but it's a kid's tale, so I guess it's whatever.."
You giggle. Faint voice accompanying it- and while it still hurts to be reminded of your forever pain, the fact that you're amused, makes him feel at ease.
"So, a turtle said he'd do it, and went upstairs to the dry lands to find a rabbit." He continues, moving the pages, new images for you to see revealed. "And when he found one, he lied to the rabbit to get him to come down under the sea with him- because no way would that fucker go down with him to get his organs stolen." He explains. "Told him that he was invited by the king to be a simple guest- and the rabbit believed the turtle, because why not? It's a great opportunity." He says, and at that, you seem to fall deep into thought.
"And at first…" Jungkook moves on, turning the pages again to show new drawn pictures of the kingdom of the seas the rabbit rides through, sat on the turtle's back. You're equally as mesmerized it seems like, until Jungkook continues the story. "Everything was beautiful. The scenery, the people, the first impression." He finishes his sentence, turning the page again. "Until he stood in front of the king, and learned why he was really there."
Your eyes widen as you look at the picture of the giant king, and the small rabbit sat in front.
"But the rabbit wasn't as easy to trick as they thought." He suddenly says with a lower, more serious tone now, and at that, you look at Jungkook, hopeful eyes demanding him to continue. "The rabbit told him he'd love to cure him, but that he left his liver in the forest up on land." He says, and you no longer seem interested in the pictures as you watch how Jungkook closes the book- he knows how this story ends, after all.
"He lied as well, and made the turtle bring him back up." He reveals, before he looks back at you. "And then told that cunt that he lied just as much, before he ran away into the safety of the forest-" Jungkook tells you, reaching out to brush some of your hair away from your face. "-never to be caught by the king again."
It reminds you of something. But you're not sure if it's real, or if it was a dream.
Maybe it was both.
Or maybe even neither.
⋅ ⋅ ── ⋅ ⋅ ── ⋅ ⋅ ── ⋅ ⋅ ── ⋅ ⋅ ── ⋅ ⋅ ── ⋅ ⋅ ── ⋅ ⋅ ── ⋅ ⋅
"Jungkook- before I show you this you have to promise me you'll stay as calm as you can." Hoseok threatens, shielding the screen from the tiger hybrid who's already suspicious. "I know you'll freak out, but.. try and not do something irrational." He says, making Jungkook glare at him for a good moment, before he nods, crossing his arms.
Only then does Hoseok step aside, clicking to start the video that he's snatched before it could be sent directly to Jungkook's laptop.
And now Jungkook know exactly why Hoseok was so worried, and watched it himself first before deciding to show it to him later.
He knows exactly where this was filmed- the cage in the middle of the warehouse too familiar to ever forget. It's as if Jungkook can smell the sweat and fear and aggression around him again, mixed with the iron of blood and cracking of bones. But this time, it's not him in the ring. This time, he might be witnessing why you're now lost without any memories of what and who you once were.
Sickeningly enough, he has to admit that solely on an objective base, you're very agile in dodging- but it's clear that you're not good at keeping that stamina up, as you're tugged away from the side of the cage you cling to, and thrown into a corner, back hitting the metal mesh harshly. You're kicked, and punched, and tugged around like a ragdoll-and he can't tear his eyes away as he watches you trying to shield yourself from the aggression of the large bear hybrid that's trying to stomp you into the stained floor below.
And then people clap, and Daeho steps up to the cage, opening it up after the bear hybrid is removed. You tumble out, unmoving for a second, before you slowly sit up- much to Jungkook's surprise.
You've endured so much. Just for the sick entertainment of others?
You took his place.
Daeho leans down to you, says something to you, before you're taken away, uncaring of the fact that you clearly cannot walk- and Jungkook can't watch anymore, fist forcefully coming down onto the table, causing several items to jump and fall over as he paces with his hands on his head, trying to keep his cool.
"It would explain her amnesia." Namjoon mumbles, watching Hoseok close the video again. "Jimin mentioned that she has some weakness in her left leg when she walks, and that there's scarring on her back, as well as on her right side." He says. "He assumes she had a collapsed lung at some point, and a leg injury that did not heal properly. But she would have to be properly examined in a hospital for that."
"Then we bring her to one." Jungkook says. "We have an agreement with Seoul Central. Admit her there, and make sure Jimin and Seokjin stay-" He starts, but Namjoon shakes his head.
"She's not mentally stable enough for that, Jungkook." He worries. "And currently, she's not having any major issues at all. We shouldn't put her through any stress she doesn't have to go through."
Jungkook nods, growls to himself. He knows this.
And hates feeling this helpless.
"Why doesn't she talk?" Jungkook wants to know, and everyone is silent at that, unsure if they should answer. But one look from Jungkook's darkened eyes is enough to make Namjoon submit to the pressure.
"Jimin said he suspects.. that her vocal chords are paralyzed from a past infection.." He starts, and from the look he receives from his leader, he knows he cannot just leave it at that. "..or that it was intentional damage."
"Speak clearly to me." Jungkook demands.
"Acid. Bleach. Battery fluid." Jimin takes over, having entered the room so quietly almost no one noticed him. "She was probably silenced before she was sold." He bluntly states, Jungkook's pulse raging at this point.
"Can it be fixed?" Jungkook asks lowly, hard to hear.
"Most likely not entirely." Jimin explains. "But she might be able to learn how to speak again, if only faintly- if it is only scar tissue preventing the vocal chords to move properly." He shrugs, leaning against a wall. "There's no magic cure for her, Jungkook. She's got permanent injuries, physical and mental. There's no sugarcoating it." He shrugs.
Not many people dare to speak so bluntly with the tiger hybrid- but Jimin has quite literally nothing to lose. He's got no home, no friends, no family, no career- no identity except here, no home besides this place. If Jungkook kicks him out, he's a ghost, nothing else.
So he's as bold as he needs to be.
"There's already a chance she might remember what's happened to her." Jimin says, catching Jungkook's attention on him. "And when that happens.."
"…she'll need you more than ever."
⋅ ⋅ ── ⋅ ⋅ ── ⋅ ⋅ ── ⋅ ⋅ ── ⋅ ⋅ ── ⋅ ⋅ ── ⋅ ⋅ ── ⋅ ⋅ ── ⋅ ⋅
When Jungkook opens the door, you're met with a different sight than usual.
His black button up has the first few buttons undone, sleeves rolled up to reveal his tattoos, dark eyes looking at you from beneath his hair that's hanging a little over his forehead. He's silent, gazes down at you- before he walks aside, and lets you in.
He always lets you in.
It's clear from the book you're holding that you probably want him to read something again- but the moment he reaches for it, you suddenly step back, walking away from him to put the book on his office table instead, right next to his laptop. He's confused, especially when you take his hand to tug him towards the small leather sofa that's situated in this room- making him sit down, before you search for something, clearly not finding it.
So instead, you run out the room, making him notice what Jimin has mentioned- the way you seem less steady on one of your legs as you leave the room, only returning a few minutes later, closing the door behind you.
Before you gently push his shoulder to the side, blanket thrown over him.
"I'm not tired." He tells you, but you look at him, before you point at your eyes. "I always look like that." He defends himself, but you still shake your head, forcing him back down.
Forcing being not the right word really, considering you're technically no match for him, at least not physically. And he has to admit- he is actually quite tired.
What he does notice however is how you sit down in front of the sofa now, your back against the furniture as you watch the door.
You're guarding him.
And somehow, that hurts.
"You don't have to watch over me, you know." He tells you, hand reaching out for your head. "Go sleep as well." He tells you- but you seem to misunderstand, because you suddenly crawl underneath the blanket in front of him, settling on his arm as you cling to him now, hiding almost in his chest.
You can't voice out your confusion, can't tell him how disorienting it feels to be so drawn to him, and crave his comfort like this, when you don't even know him.
Or do you?
You dream of him, more often now that you're living here in the same space as he does. You're not sure what those dreams mean at all, but you believe they might be trying to tell you something you can't figure out yet.
What you can figure out currently however, is the fact that as he holds you a little tighter now, adjusting the blanket over your shoulder, you feel him almost.. no. That can't be right.
Because why would he be sad?
⋅ ⋅ ── ⋅ ⋅ ── ⋅ ⋅ ── ⋅ ⋅ ── ⋅ ⋅ ── ⋅ ⋅ ── ⋅ ⋅ ── ⋅ ⋅ ── ⋅ ⋅
You woke up in your own room this morning, unsure how you got there.
Now you're in Hoseok's 'office'- the basement area where he keeps all his IT-Equipment and the CCTV-surveillance. He's gone to get himself something to eat, having skipped breakfast this morning, and you nodded towards him when he asked if you would be okay alone- because of course you are.
You know your job here. And you're good at it- Yoongi said that, yesterday.
And maybe that's why you immediately feel drawn to one of the screens, something just feeling out of the ordinary as you scan the cameras that have the front gate and main entrance of the premise in their view. To everyone else, everything would seem absolutely normal- bushes and trees swaying a bit in the wind, faint rain spraying onto the ground, weather today rather gloomy.
But you notice something.
There's a patch of ground near the outside of the front gate that's lighter than the rest- it's not as wet as the rest of the ground is everywhere else. And then, you notice the broken twigs of the left plants decorating the sides of the gate- and you just know something's wrong.
Someone's been there. Watching? Stalking?
Or trying to get in?
When the door opens, you're ready to gain Hoseok's attention to let him know what you found- but the person entering isn't the tall human you've come to know by now. "Huh. So he really keeps you around." The man says, pushing the mask on his face down, clearly not worried about you. It makes sense- you can't speak, and he knows this.
Because he's been the one who made sure of it.
The sight alone makes you tremble like an earthquake rumbles through your veins, boiling water instead of blood rushing through you, burning your insides like ice on a hot stove.
You're paralyzed, body in full fight or flight.
"Do you still squeak like a doorhinge?" He asks, laughs, as he walks closer to tap the keyboard on a nearby pc, opening files, before he takes out a USB stick he plugs into the port.
What is he doing?
How can you get away?
Should you do something?
What will he do if you try to run?
You can see that he's clearly bypassing the systems security by downloading files directly- and you're not sure what exactly that will mean for the future of everyone here. If they know how the premise is set up and how everything works for Jungkook and the company he runs as a cover up to his actual doings, it'll all be over.
You fingers itch. Is it worth losing them?
Yesterday, when Jungkook held you on the couch, you felt odd. He was delicate yet firm in the way he made sure you'd stay close, hands never wandering, only holding you like something precious. Yoongi refuses to tell you either what you are to the tiger hybrid- he just keeps telling you that if you ever feel like you're scared of everything,
Jungkook will never be someone you'll have to fear.
And maybe if you become something he can rely on just as much, you'll finally find someplace you deserve calling home.
Your eyes move around the room, mapping out where the fastest route would be to exit after your fingers find the distinctive panic button under the desk you're standing next to.
"Don't even think about it." Han says, and you freeze, mouth drying up. "You wouldn't do that." He chuckles, looking over at you.
And you're not sure why that makes you angry.
But it does.
The electricity cuts off, room dipped in nothing but black before the red emergency light turns on after you press the button- and you're already out the door, dashing down the hallway and up the stairs while you can hear Han right behind you, gun being shot into your direction.
Did he hit you? Miss you? You can't tell, your ears are ringing.
You don't know where you're running to when you realize the familiar hallway you're finding yourself in- and again, you decide in a split second to be brave, because this is all you have to lose now. This is all you have to your name- and Jungkook's voice suddenly echoes in your head.
"You belong here, and nowhere else."
He'd said it with such finality that it made you unsure back then- but now, after meeting Yoongi, and Hoseok, and Seokjin and Jimin and Namjoon and everyone else-
You believe it, even if it's a lie to keep you here.
"From now on, you're mine."
And you want to be his.
You want to belong.
And if this is your chance to earn your spot, you'll take it.
⋅ ⋅ ── ⋅ ⋅ ── ⋅ ⋅ ── ⋅ ⋅ ── ⋅ ⋅ ── ⋅ ⋅ ── ⋅ ⋅ ── ⋅ ⋅ ── ⋅ ⋅
Everyone's on edge as they peak around corners, guns drawn and loaded.
Yoongi watches as Jungkook's eyes reflect in the dark just like his own, the hybrids of the estate having a huge advantage right now with their eyesight quickly adapting to the darkness.
It's why Jungkook put it in place together with him, back when they put up the entire security system.
The only thing he's currently worried about is the lack of communication- with the entire system down, it must've been something wrong in the IT-room in the basement, which meant that the entire system would shut down to prevent either damage or theft.
But it also meant that you're involved, since you're supposed to be with Hoseok.
Another pair of reflective eyes is found, one a little dimmer than the other signaling that it's Taehyung who's looking at them. He nods, quiet greeting, before everyone moves around, quietly, unsure what's currently going on.
Namjoon and Hoseok are probably hiding right now, as they should.
Then, a shot.
Another one, right after.
And then, it's quiet.
"Did someone deal with it?" Taehyung whispers and Jungkook can't answer that, so everyone moves rather towards the sound of the last shot, to figure out what had happened.
It leads the small group near the entrance hall, where Jungkook spots..
you?
He immediately tells Taehyung who's not met you yet to realize it's you, to put down his weapon, everyone clearly now relaxing as well. Yoongi, right behind Jungkook, locks eyes with everyone- a clear sign to stay back, because the smell of fear is thick in the air.
Jungkook makes sure to walk loud enough for you to notice- ears snapping back towards him, body still shaking as you hold something in front of you.
And once he reaches you, he can see it.
Your hands clench the gun so tightly that he's wondering not if it hurts- but how much. The man in front of your feet is gone by now, shot right in the face, and once in his neck, blood soaking up your socks. Your finger is still pushing down the trigger even though the magazine is clearly empty, gun no longer a threat, barely warm to the touch most likely.
He's slow as he walks closer behind you, arms taking the same position as yours do, as he gently holds your hands.
"You're okay." He tells you, and only now do you seem to start breathing again, if only just a little, before you walk back, panic bubbling up inside you as you notice the blood on your feet- but he holds you, takes the gun away from you before he let's Yoongi take it, turning you over to instead hold onto him-
your hoarse screams barely loud enough to echo off the walls of the entrance hall, while you painfully sob against the tiger's chest.
⋅ ⋅ ── ⋅ ⋅ ── ⋅ ⋅ ── ⋅ ⋅ ── ⋅ ⋅ ── ⋅ ⋅ ── ⋅ ⋅ ── ⋅ ⋅ ── ⋅ ⋅
"It was just a graze. Almost nothing." Jimin sighs, as he puts down the gun in the plastic bag on Jungkook's table. "What's more interesting, would be who she shot." He sings almost, sitting down boldly across from him on the table, curled tail almost knocking down some papers.
"Did Namjoon figure it out?" Jungkook wonders, closing his laptop before he pulls the glass of whiskey closer, ice cubes knocking against the glass as he brings it to his lips.
"His name's Park Han." Jimin says. "And, according to tapes, he was Daeho's favorite when it came to.. suspect torture." He says.
"What are you trying to tell me-" He wants to know, when Jimin puts down a folded note, clearly coming from your notebook.
'They held my head back, and he laughed.' is written in shaky handwriting. 'And then he poured-'
Jungkook doesn't read any further.
"She took her revenge." Jimin offers, taking the note back before he offers another one. "And she's starting to understand, too." The wolfdog explains, his folded, torn ear moving towards the tiger as he takes the note to read. "I asked her why she did it, just for context."
'I belong here.' is written down.
'Jungkook's office was down the left side, so I went right' the note continues. Jungkook fills in what Jimin probably asked you himself- it's not hard to do.
'He protects us. So we must protect him, when he can't'
"She's right, you know?" Jimin kindly says, the tiger slowly looking up only with his eyes. "You protect us. And we'll be here for you too, when you need us." He offers, his torn ear flicking around a bit- a common thing, since he has permanent nerve damage in it after having it shredded by a shotgun, years ago when Jungkook found him. "You're not on your own." Jimin reminds him.
And Jungkook stays silent, before he folds the note, and puts it into a drawer of his office desk.
To keep, if he needs the reminder once more.
⋅ ⋅ ── ⋅ ⋅ ── ⋅ ⋅ ── ⋅ ⋅ ── ⋅ ⋅ ── ⋅ ⋅ ── ⋅ ⋅ ── ⋅ ⋅ ── ⋅ ⋅
"We gotta teach you how to properly shoot." Yoongi comments as he looks at your bruised hands- wrist safely tucked into a brace from having gotten hurt during the two shots you made. You instantly shake your head, clearly not on board with that idea. "No?" The dog hybrid chuckles, though he lets the topic go for now.
Thanks to you, nothing was stolen- and the few drops of data lost during the shutdown of the system are nothing compared to what could've happened.
Now, you're sitting on a bench outside in the backside gardens, enjoying the smell the rain left earlier today. It's been a week since the incident, and you've changed.
Jimin already said that something must've clicked in your head- cementing your believe now that you do in fact belong into this place. And while he's not sure if the reason you believe that now is the correct one, it's a start- right now, you feel like you earned your place, and that's okay.
You never had to, but you did it nonetheless.
And in this very moment, Yoongi realizes that you don't actually need your memories all that much. You don't have to know who he is to befriend him like you're slowly doing now. You don't have to know who Jungkook is to learn how to trust him.
Your past is long gone anyways- there's no use in chasing it.
These days, Yoongi's job has changed. He's now officially your very own guard dog, watching over you in person, or like a ghost from the sidelines when you want to be alone. And he likes this. Because you're clearly okay with it.
It leads to moments like these, where one could be fooled into thinking that everything's just fine.
"We should go inside now." Yoongi suggests, noticing you shivering a little, standing up together with you to walk back into the mansion shared by everyone. When you enter the kitchen with him, everyone's already eating- except Jungkook.
And it leads to you making everyone laugh again, because you found your very own way of communicating, especially asking for Jungkook.
Your hands find your ears, before you imitate the roundness of Jungkook's, making even the usually stoic Taehyung laugh.
"Oh, Jungkook is in his office." Namjoon tells you.
"How about you bring him something to eat, hm?" Jimin smiles, plating something up before he gives both plates to you. "So he's not lonely." He adds, and you nod, taking both plates from him before you leave the kitchen.
"I thought he wanted to be alone?" Hoseok wonders, and Jimin laughs, sitting back down again next to Yoongi.
"Oh he always wants to be alone, let's be real." He whines. "He could use the company. Maybe he'll take a break for once as well." He shrugs, and everyone agrees digging back into their food.
Meanwhile, you're slowly making your way upstairs, way to Jungkook's office by now well known by you as you stand in front of the door, unsure how to knock now with your hands occupied, and voice useless- now more than ever.
So you use your elbow rather awkwardly, hoping he heard you anyways-
which he did, office door opening with him looking past your head before he looks down to find your eyes staring back- hands offering the plate towards him.
He sighs, well aware that this must've been Jimin's idea.
But he lets you in anyways, offering you a chair to sit on and eat at the office desk with him. And for a good while, it's quiet- his fingers occasionally tapping away on his laptop, food slowly getting cold, when you gain a rush of boldness you're not quite sure of where it comes from.
It might be his scent filling this room. You always feel.. oddly safe when you're close to him.
But suddenly, your hand pushes at the laptop screen, shutting it the second he's giving you a chance for it with his hands gone.
Silence.
There's a staring contest going on for a moment, his signature tiger gaze strong on you, your fingers still on top of the laptop-
when something remarkable happens that makes you feel.. odd.
He smiles. Laughs, even.
And you decide that you want to see more of this side of him.
You want to see him happy.
And maybe that's your true role in this place, down the line.
⋅ ⋅ ── ⋅ ⋅ ── ⋅ ⋅ ── ⋅ ⋅ ── ⋅ ⋅ ── ⋅ ⋅ ── ⋅ ⋅ ── ⋅ ⋅ ── ⋅ ⋅
Tumblr media
368 notes · View notes
adrianlikesdinos · 3 months
Text
so. I've been meaning to do a deep dive analysis into the symbolism behind the flowers the Ripper uses in the episode Futamono for awhile now. buckle up yall. here it goes.
In the episode it is brought up that all three of the flowers used (white oleander, belladonna, and ragwort) are poisonous. Jack sees this as the Ripper judging his victim to be toxic; However, flowers hold a lot more meaning than what is just seen on a surface level and I am willing to bet money Hannibal, with his attention to detail and culture, is more than aware of these flowers meanings, even far past just their Victorian meanings. And, there is also the placement of these flowers and why what type replaced what organ.
Lets start with the white oleander. Known in the Victorian era as a sign of caution, used as a warning against the complex nature of love and romance, this flower commonly represents love, desire, and seduction. This meaning and its name is said to stem from a Greek myth. A young man, Leander, was trying to woo a woman and he would swim a great length to her every night, but, one night he gets caught in a tempest. His body is discovered after his love goes out looking for him, calling "oh, Leander! oh, Leander!" his dead and drowned body is clutching the flowers. As a symbol of their love, the flowers continue to grow. This myth is important in the context of this Ripper victim because he had been drowned, the water in his lungs being the first hit or tip in the direction of framing Dr. Chilton and freeing Will. This flower, often symbolizing love, seduction and serving as caution to love and its effects, can also give some bit of motive as to why Hannibal is now working to free Will after he was the one to frame him. Hannibal has realized his misses Will, which is evident in the way he sits alone in his office every week at 7:30, and is now trying to win back his favour. Lounds was not his first attempt at courting. There is also meaning in the etymology of this plants name. Some believe the name comes from a mix of rhododendron and olea (olive,) two plants oleander resembles. When mixed with the belief the name come from the greek words ollyo, meaning "i kill," and aner, meaning "man," it gives the impression of a sort of wolf in sheep's clothing that is very similar to Hannibal's "person suit" further connecting Hannibal to this flower personally. It is also important to note the reason behind what flower replaces what organ. This flower replaces the intestines. There is hardly any symbolic meaning behind the placement of this flower except that oleander poisoning causes GI distress that is particularly prominent in animals and causes severe abdominal pain.
Belladonna is very well known for being extremely poisonous, all of its symbolism stems from this fact. The Victorian meaning for this flower is a warning and an omen of death. Its poisonous properties were already discussed in the show so I won't spend time on how its most popular symbolism is Death. The flowers were placed in a dead body. This is a crime show. Omens of death are a Tuesday night. In Homer's the Odyssey, deadly nightshade was used to poison men who landed on Circe's island and turn them into pigs. The addition of this flower implies the Ripper’s belief his victims are nothing more than rude pigs. The piece that stood out to me the most, however, was the flowers use in the Victorian era to dilate pupils because it was seen as attractive and seductive. After extended use, these eye drops would leave women blind. This directly represents what Hannibal is doing to Alana. The episode cuts from Hannibal declaring to Alana he needs to get his appetite back, straight to this victim. in Mizumono when Alana realizes how blind she has been Hannibal is quick to say "in your defence, i worked very hard to blind you." Hannibal prides himself on how effective his manipulations are, the addition of this flower is a blatant brag. a taunt. The effects this plant's poison has on the body are symptoms very similar to those Will suffered from throughout season 1, like headache, confusion, hallucinations, it also disturbs cognitive capacities like memory. In domesticated animals it causes narcosis. What flowers replace what organs is dependent on how that plant affects the body, this flower, however, does not mainly affect the heart and it is not commonly the cause of death when poisoned. The common cause of death is respiratory failure. It would make sense that, because the lungs needed to stay with the body, the Ripper chose to replace the heart instead because the circulatory system supports the respiratory system.
Ragwort, though poisonous, is never really of any danger to humans. It takes quite a lot to kill and because of its unpleasant taste it is hard for humans to build up enough in their system to do any harm. This plant is also very common, seen as a weed in most places. It holds very little symbolic meaning. What is commonly known about this plant is the danger it causes for domestic animals like horses and cows. It is said that if one seed is inhaled by a horse it would kill it. This wives tale is highly exaggerated but wives tales always come from some vein of truth. When this flower grows in pastures it probably won't do much harm if horses eat it, but too much is incredibly damaging. It becomes deadly when this plant mistakenly ends up dried into animal’s hay. It kills by attacking the liver, the organ which this flower replaces. The toxin itself does not affect the body but the broken down product, it destroys DNA and actively kills the liver’s cells. The danger it poses to animals is what creates symbolic meaning in its use. By replacing the liver with this flower it signifies the Ripper's belief that his victims are nothing but livestock. And the flower's lack of symbolism in culture creates a blank canvas for the ripper to paint his own meaning.
so yeah, flowers are really cool. the Ripper is a hopeless romantic. I would say this is a product of too much time on my hands but school has been kicking my ass and this took like 5 days to put together.
I might be doing a part two because during my research for this, a post by @alice-lecter pointed out the flowers actually used are not the ones mentioned when Jack, Zeller, and Price are discussing the body. Because of the use of both narcissus and hyacinth, I am almost certain the flowers actually used hold at least some meaning because of how Greek myth is often used in the show itself (mainly referencing the whole Achilles and Patroclus conversation.) but that is an analysis for another time. :)
105 notes · View notes
cuubism · 1 year
Note
A little headcannon that has been stewing in my head for a while and has absolutely no proof from the cannon
Death has wings right? What if Dream used to have wings too but when his kingdom got invaded for the first time(that story he tells in the Overture) the invaders cut his wings off. That's the part of the reason why he crafted his helm and why's he so dependent on it. They took his wings so he took their skull and a spine, an eye for an eye kind of situation. Also, that's when Dream first started employing a raven. He still has scars on his shoulder blades that follow him to any form he takes. He's ashamed of them, sees them as a sign of weakness, a reminder of his failure and his flaws and goes to great lengths to cover them up. That's about it, but I'd love to hear what you think of it^-^
(Plus: Hob gently running his hands over the scars, showing Dream his own ones and reassuring him that there's nothing broken, or wrong with him)
NO BUT THIS IS SO ANGSTY I LOVE IT. i love suffering
i feel like a permanent injury like that would have to be done to dream's core essence, such as it is, rather than his 'physical form' - i don't know if dream's physical form in the waking world or other realms can even be hurt like that. it would have to be like, something that deeply wounds the dreaming, or the concept of dreaming, or just like the deepest core of dream as an 'entity' rather than it being a physical wound. (this is leading me on a mental tangent about injuries to large groups of dreamers also injuring dream, like, extinction events and such, but that's for another time).
you managed to rope me into it, congrats XD
content warning for blood, gore, violence, Things Done That Can't Be Undone, etc.
--
There is not much, in his long life and memory, that Dream is able to forget. Thoughts do not drift into irrelevancy, into the past, the way they do for humans. He is able to hold much, all at once, in the cavern of his mind, eons of all that has happened hovering close enough to touch. It is a heavy weight more often than it is an aid.
But he forgets, sometimes, with Hob.
With Hob, the rare points of their contact stand out as singularly bright stars in the nebula of Dream's existence. All else within him fades. When Hob takes his hand Dream feels clear as a desert sky, when Hob kisses him for the first time, Dream is floating free in a great salt lake, hanging weightless.
He forgets.
It's only after, bodies pressed together with pleasing heat and sweat-tackiness, Hob tracing patterns over his back, that Dream begins to remember again.
"Dream..." Hob's fingers stutter over his shoulder blades. His voice catches with the hesitance he has often displayed with Dream since their reunion. I think you're here for friendship. Dream feels the echoes.
He kisses Hob's throat, tastes the salt tang of his skin, hides his face away there. The weight of embodiment returning. "Ask your question," he says. "I swear not to part from you now."
"Is this from...?" Hob's fingertips dance up the raised arcs of scar tissue over his back. Pain sparkles in the wake of his touch like the sharpness of a hand-drawn tattoo in the permanence of its inking. As humans imagine it. Dream is not truly physical and could not bear such a mark. Except for this.
"No," he tells Hob. Blame for many of Dream's recent ordeals can be laid at Roderick Burgess's feet, but not this one. "Much older than that."
"Oh." Hob keeps tracing the scar over Dream's right shoulder blade. The touch aches deep in Dream's being where those wounds originate, but he does not tell Hob to stop. Even like this, Hob's hands bring him back, and back, and keep him here.
Hob is waiting, leaving an opening for him to elaborate. Dream is not yet sure whether he wishes to.
"It is not a pretty story," he says.
Hob strokes through his hair. Dream keeps his head tucked under his chin and so feels each word as it's spoken. "Neither of us is a pretty story, darling. Tell it if you want to."
Dream has not spoken of this in many years. There are those in the Dreaming who have served him for millennia whom he has not told. He has taken lovers, had them see the scars during their lovemaking, and still not relayed the story.
"When I was young," he begins, "and still coming into my power, the Dreaming was invaded. My borders were not as strong, then. My realm, less populated. Ancient beings, older than I was at the time, hungered for my realm. Sought its power for their own."
"Older than dreams?" Hob asks.
"In their universe, there were no dreams," Dream tells him. "Perhaps it is what drew them to me."
"Alright. Wow." Hob sounds thoughtful. He rubs Dream's back, between his shoulder blades where it doesn't hurt. "Go on, love."
"I fought them. But the collective unconscious of this universe was young and undeveloped, as was I; I had not mastered all elements of my domain. I fought, but inelegantly, and struggled to counter dreamless beings when all my power was in the unconscious. They were wholly anchored in the present; I, in the space between seconds; we were poorly suited as combatants."
"What did you do?" Hob asks, quiet. He can sense, Dream thinks, the direction this is going, that Dream would not be so hesitant to tell the story of scars born of victory.
"I did not know," Dream admits, equally quiet, still shamed by it, his own failure, and its branching repercussions, "what to do. And the Eldest God, he who had first rent open the walls of my realm, pounced on my uncertainty, captured me, held me--"
The memory, never forgotten, always just within reach should he turn towards it, rises again -- the silk-smooth black sand on the shores of the Dreaming, crushed into his cheek; the warm waters lapping at his mouth, nose, eyes, drowning him; the impossible weight on his spine of the impossible dreamless creature holding him down, arms wrenched behind his back, the feral animal growl that had escaped him, the equally animal panic beating under his ribcage, the fragile spun dreamstuff of him held in the sharptoothed maw of cold reality, his wings--
"Dream?"
Dream comes back to himself. Comes back to Hob. The overwarm flannel sheets. The soft press of Hob's body. He's tapping something on Hob's arm, and hadn't realized he was doing it. It's the rhythm of an old song from before the time of men, the electrical beats passed along root chains from tree to tree to tree, all the way across the great forests that now exist only in scarce patches on the earth.
Dream shifts ever closer to Hob's body, slips a knee between Hob's thighs to tangle them, bare skin to bare skin, limb to limb, root to root.
"I had wings, then," he says.
--his wings, flapping frantically in the face of the thing that pinned him, feathers catching and tearing on jagged armor, held to the ground the way a creature of flight was never meant to be--
"Oh," breathes Hob. He touches the long scar over Dream's shoulder blade again and pauses there. The pain catches the story to Dream again like a hook and holds it there as he continues bleeding it dry.
"The Eldest God dug his claws into me and tore the wings from my body." Dream's voice doesn't shake but he does not manage more than a whisper. "I am not a physical creature, Hob, understand this, I cannot be so easily harmed, it was not a physical form that was damaged, rather, the Old Gods came from stone and earth and it was stone they harnessed as their claws, ancient stone to carve into my being and tear out my wings from the essence of me, root and stem, flesh and bone, air and feather and starlight."
All of this comes out in a continuous rush, and Hob kisses the side of his head, says, "Breathe."
He can still feel, if he but thinks back, the tearing of the claws. A cold so bright it felt like burning. His face ground into the sand to muffle his scream, the howling whiteout of pain overtaking all other noise, the crack of his shoulder joint as it was broken. Star stuff spilling out over the sand - Dream hadn't even known he could bleed until then. Hands that should never have touched in the first place releasing him. Collapsing, disarmed, to the ground. Every limb on fire, the ones that were left.
"Dream."
He lost himself, and found himself again some time later curled in the shallows of the Dreaming sea, seeking shelter from the cold in the warm waters. Face half submerged, breathing as much salt water as air. Blood still spooling around him like leftover paint whirling in a water glass.
"Dream."
Even in those warm waters, he was shivering. Dream doesn't think he's ever been quite warm since; that cold latched itself in him somewhere and never left.
Hob's voice, now, against his ear. He's curled himself around Dream while Dream wasn't paying attention, Dream's back to the warm protection of Hob's chest. "You don't have to finish if you don't want to."
Dream will not leave a story unfinished, not even one such as this. "When I had regained my strength enough to fight back," he continues, "I was... not in control. I knew only survival. If the Old Gods had wished me to understand their world, they succeeded. I abandoned my powers and fought with my hands and my claws and my teeth, and I tore the Eldest God's skull and spine from his body. Both of us would be maimed, I thought; if he would have my dreams then I would have for my own the backbone upon which he held his earth. I listened to him scream. I watched each rib pry up from his chest and snap, my hands slick with his blood, his with mine, and felt nothing but the raw satiation of a wolf setting upon meat. I have told you, Hob." He takes his first breath in a while and feels it rattle, hollow, around his ribcage. "It is not a pretty story."
"No." Hob's hand finds Dream's against his middle, tangles their fingers, holds him. His breath is shaky in Dream's hair, words more so. "No, darling, it's not. I'm sorry."
They rewrote the story of the Dreaming, Dream recalls saying to Destiny, after. Before he had come to know, truly, what Destiny was. Kneeling in his garden, blood still draping his raw back like a shroud, Dream had sought meaning, answers, reason. Foolish, in retrospect, to even consider asking for succor.
Destiny had said that the Dreaming had seeped too far into the Waking world. That what had happened was a necessary rebalancing.
Had Dream not been forbidden from physical violence against his siblings, he would have bitten off one of Destiny's hands with his own sharp teeth and asked if he felt more balanced then.
"Now you know what vicious creature you lie with, Hob Gadling," Dream says. The words are heavy in his throat, but he can't find it in himself to slip from Hob's hold. Now you know the jagged turn at the beginning of my story.
He wonders, sometimes, what the Dreaming might have been like had it continued on the other branch of Destiny's forking path. What he might have been like. There is so much space between a winged creature and a once-winged creature. The entire sky.
"I know." Hob bites at the back of Dream's neck, light but sharp, then kisses that same spot. The nip of pain is unexpectedly soothing. Hob too knows what it is to bite and claw and writhe and maul. “I know. I’ve known your darkness, honey. Don’t you worry.”
“They fled me,” Dream tells him. “The Old Gods. After. I did not understand why at the time.” He had stood, bloodied, shaking, over their Eldest one, bones grasped in his hands, and watched them disappear. These beings that could still have shredded the Dreaming and swallowed it, but chose to run. “Now, I imagine it is like the way men will flee from an animal that is so much smaller than them but has gone rabid. The wrongness. The danger of irreparable madness. They saw me ruined and wished not to catch it, saw the Dreaming—”
This wound has dulled over time and become but a throbbing ache at the base of his skull, a reminder of something missing. But it never disappears.
“The Dreaming, changed, from what they had wanted.”
Dream’s back has never been quite right, since. His anatomy is meant for two sets of joints, not one. But it is only a fitting marker of the permanent damage done that day.
“Changed?” says Hob, so gentle now, lips brushing his skin.
“There was once more,” Dream says. “The collective unconscious was once more… collective.”
“Wait. D’you mean…?”
“Yes. There was more interconnection between minds when I was young. There were not human minds in the sense that you would know them, not yet. But there was communication, and knowing, back then.”
Vestiges of it still linger. In the vast underground networks of the trees, the paired spins of distant atoms. The matched steps of lovers finding perfect synchronicity in a dance. But—
“That was sundered with my wings.”
The cold that had washed over Dream when that realization hit had been worse than the pain of losing the wings in the first place. How he had failed the dreamers under his care. Let things fracture and tear and separate when they were meant to be together.
Hob sighs against the back of his neck. “I’m so sorry, Dream.”
“I am sorry,” Dream says. “It should never have happened.”
“No, it shouldn’t,” Hob agrees, and it’s sweet pain sliding between Dream’s ribs, for Hob to press his fingertips to the rawness of him and say, yes, failure, failure, I see it now.
But Hob kisses the point of his shoulder, the ever-tense muscles of his upper back, the hard curve of his scapula and the calcified line of another almost-joint, lost to time. His lips find the uneven scar tissue and press there, which is its own sweet pain, but sliding towards sweet, a sharp bite to kissed lips.
“It shouldn’t,” Hob whispers, and the words vibrate to the core of him. Hob does not see his failure, will not; Dream had forgotten Hob’s charity towards him, how he will see the blood on Dream’s hands and wipe it away instead of asking how it got there. Dream’s failures have stolen something from him he does not even know to miss, and still.
Now Dream does wish for Hob’s hands slipping under his ribs. Hob would find the aching wretched thing within him that had been loosed that day and hold it in his palms, wash the blood from it with careful strokes. Would that Hob could have held him then, submerged him deep in the waters of the Dreaming sea until the dark and the warmth and the strong hold of his arms had soothed the flayed and violated creature that Dream had become back to sanity. Before the gnashing rageful part of him had turned predator and fully grown its claws.
Perhaps there is succor to be found, after all. How quickly Hob Gadling has become it.
“I wish that I could have…” Hob sighs. It sounds mournful, longing. “I don’t even know. Helped you. Held you. Futile, I know.”
“I would not have you feel badly. It is long past and cannot be undone,” Dream says, as if Hob’s words don’t mean more to him than he could possibly know.
“Nothing can, sweetheart,” Hob says. His hair brushes Dream’s shoulders. It is terribly soft now, in this day and age. Dream suspects it was not always so. Human lives have rarely been soft on their bodies. He appreciates the softness of Hob’s body now, and how it cradles him. Dream himself has long been unchangeably hard-edged. “But I would still help you.”
“Sweetheart,” Dream repeats. Dream might have been sweet, once, at the end of a different story. “You would call me this, at the end of this tale?”
Hob turns him so they are facing each other once more. A tear has gathered in the corner of his eye, and slips down to wet his pillowcase as Dream watches. Tears for Dream. Warm salt water. He smiles at Dream anyway.
“You’re my sweetheart. My dear one. You think I would think anything about this other than sadness for you?”
“Dear one,” Dream echoes. “Always good to me, my Hob.”
“‘Course.” Hob squeezes his hand. Hands that too have known violence, but soft for Dream, always. “Is there anything I can do for you? Anything at all?”
“Only what you have already done,” Dream says. “Be a cavern where I can shelter from the cold.”
Hob kisses him, hot and lingering, and pulls the blankets up over their heads.
551 notes · View notes
didoldacc · 10 months
Text
penchant ● choi beomgyu
Tumblr media Tumblr media
nsfw content, minors please do not interact!
warnings: manipulative themes and mental health problems, heavy emphasis on beomgyu's beauty, religious references(only used to describe beomgyu's beauty, reader doesn't have an established religion so don't worry), hurt/comfort, reader is also an idol, misogynistic themes, no one in the story is "good" but the villain is reader's group member, toxic relationships, mentions of su1c1d3 cheating, first lovers to exes to lovers, hurt comfort, breaking in, topic of drug addiction, possesive yandereish!beomgyu, soft and hard dom!beomgyu, sub!reader, marking, pet names, oral (both receiving), fingering, praise kink, dacryphilia, size kink, unprotected sex, breeding kink, degradation, dumbification, drowning kink, manhandling, multiple rounds, overstimulation, body worship(not just body worship tbh, reader worships beomgyu basically), choking, hair pulling, objectification, beomgyu takes advantage of reader's low point but great aftercare(finally a good thing), a really dumb solution for the conflict this is my very first full-length fic so i don't know how will this go, let me know if there is anything else i should add to warnings that i have missed. also don't forget to read the disclaimers at the end of the story.
qurbone ta hazole ta: "give up(my life for)/sacrifice(myself to) you, to beautiful you."
Tumblr media
"they say when god created joseph, he wasted more than half of all humanity's beauty on him. yet here you are. even all of it wouldn't create another you."
an intense pain you feel on your chest. it really sucks that you have no one you trust to talk about what you are going through. but even if you did, you are not sure if you have the courage to tell the truth. so you just find a corner where you can silently cry. a place that no one knows except for him. you don't let yourself cry out even though it is exactly what you need so you just sit there in fetal position and put your head on your knees while tears just keeps shedding.
suddenly you hear footsteps coming towards the room you are in. you just wish it wasn't him. you don't want to face anyone, especially him. you don't have the courage to face him. you did nothing wrong to him yet he is the only person that you don't want them to find out. you feel guilty all over again and even though your mind wants to stop your tears shed even more and your sobs become audible.
and your fear comes true. you hear beomgyu's voice. you cannot comprehend what he is saying but it is not hard to assume why he is here. obviously he had to make a phone call. you try to wipe down your tears before he walks into room and check yourself if you look like you have been crying. and unfortunately for you definitely do. as soon as your hand goes to your purse to find something to clean your ruined make up, you hear the door opening.
he sees you and paniced expression covers his face. your ruined eye make up, your sclera turned red, your puffed face, your messy hair. it is impossible for anyone to not pity you in your state so it is not hard to imagine how pitiful you ex would be in this position.
he immediately hangs up his phone. from what you were able to heard, you assumed that the person on the phone with him was his new girlfriend. your lips move slightly upwards to the idea of him hanging up on his girlfriend for you yet you know better than thinking it meant something, of course he was going to hang up when he saw someone crying.
you pull yourself back when he starts to walk towards you. you don't know what to say or how to act. it is all awkward. one does not show their crying face to their ex boyfriends. you feel your heart racing, you can even hear it. and you find your back hitting the wall when he stops walking towards you.
surprisingly he doesn't say anything. he just comes closer and hugs you. his hands reach your hair and starts slowly patting your hair. while his grip on you thightens. you hear him humming a lullaby he knows you love to your ears. tears fall again from your eyes and sobs follow leaving your mouth. even his smell makes you feel safe. at home. you stay like that for almost an hour when he finally speaks. "so are you going to tell me what has been bothering you or you just want to stay like this?" you want to say yes but you decline his offer. you kept hearing his notification sound the whole time he was trying to calm you down. you know you should create new boundaries with him and also you don't want his act of the countenance ruin his new relationship. you just thank him and leave thinking he would let go.
the minute you leave the room, your phone's notification sound keeps ringing. messages you see yet don't open keep covering the upper side of your screen. you know it's from a certain member of your group. she spams your ktalk to say the same thing over and over again. at first you felt guilty and offered to help her deal with her problems. problems that you technically created. thoughts racing your mind. should you tell someone? your manager? your leader? the ceo? beomgyu?
yet you decide not to even though you know if they hear the story they would side with you or once you show them everything she texted.
you find yourself in front of your parents' house. you didn't even realize you were heading there when you wandered around. guess your consciousness chose here since seeing her would not be a great choice for you right now. luckily your parents were away for the next couple of days. you are not sure if them seeing you like this was a good idea.
you start a warm bath for yourself. maybe this could calm you down. dealing with her has become your full time job. heck even full time jobs had breaks, you didn't have that beautiful privilege.
as soon as your body connects with the bathtub, you hear someone opening the door. a fear -that soon fades when you see beomgyu- covers your whole body.
"beomgyu what are you doing here? how did you get in?" he doesn't bother to answer to your question. just stands there and stares at you. you were able to remain nonchalant yet you felt the urge to ask "why don't you just let go? we have broken up long time ago, i don't wanna be burden to you with my problems. it is not comfortable anymore." he just smirks and walks toward you before answering.
"you naive little thing, you never stoped being mine. and i don't like seeing what's mine get hurt by someone else." you feel a knot on your throat. the urge to cry is undeniable. what does he mean? still his? it's true that you are still single after your breakup with him even years later but at the end of the day you weren't his either.
"don't play dumb with me, princess. i know how obsessed you are with me, never really moving on... don't worry i find it cute." you know he is right. ever since the very first time your eyes had been blessed by his beauty, you only wanted to be his. for a while you were his and getting to know the real him didn't help your case of obsession with him. you started to love him more with everything you had learned, craving for even more. even him dumping you never changing anything.
when he sees your face expression turning calmer, he finally decides to answer the question you have asked when he first walked in. "i still remember the password to doorlock, that's how i got in. i am sorry for following you but i couldn't let my baby go like this." you give him a smile full of pain. "i really want to tell you everything. and i will. just let me get my head cleared first. maybe if you let me finish my bath, i will be on my right mind so i can tell the story without victimizing myself."
a sinister expression covers beomgyu's face, leaving you confused with the sudden change of atmosphere. "without me?" he simply says. he stares at your pupil growing bigger like a cat almost covering all of your iris that expresses your shock. "what about your girlfriend?" you manage to ask. "who cares? she knows she is a nobody i just choose to get my dick wet. i will just have to deal with dumping her but that can wait." you know that beomgyu is not particularly fan of the idea of one true love but you also know that he is not just a player. yet you choose to ignore the words coming out of his mouth confusing you more and accept his request. it is wrong but there is no moral compass for beomgyu's asks.
you miss his beautiful face, his beautiful body, his beautiful everything. so the voice in your head that keeps telling you that this is wrong stands no chance. god must have put all his energy while creating him. because there is no other logical explanation of why he is this beautiful. you watch him get naked. he takes his time, almost like he is teasing you. your eyes filled with admiration, you feel sick to your stomach. how can you even look at him after what you have done. sure, there is no way that he was harmed beacuse of the stupid desicions you made with your certain member yet you felt guilty.
as if he was reading your mind he starts talking again. "you were going to clear your mind, remember?" you nod while his now naked body positions himself right behind you. he made you lean your back on his chest while he starts to play with your hair. "so missed this, can't believe i was the one breaking up with you. but you'll forgive me, right? that's what my girl does." you only hum in agreement. though he doesn't need answers, he always gets what he wants when it comes to you.
his hands slowly start to play with you. light sensual touches againgst your soft skin. his hands move from your arms to your boobs giving them a gentle squeeze. the stimulation you feel on your nipples making you lean towards him even more. your new position allows him to give kisses on your forehead. "gyu~" you shamelessly start to moan his name with the really little play. he smiles and orders you to turn around. when you do he brings you to his lap before starting his abuse on your lips.
what starts as a gentle kiss filled with love turns into his way of devouring you. "gosh, you look so cute. i've missed this. i missed you." your face lights up with his words. you waste no time repeating his words of longing. his lips lifts up when he places his hand to your cheek. "you are so pretty. so pretty for me. only for me." you agree "only for you, beomie."
"want to make me happy?" he asks while grabbing your face. "anything, my god. anything for you." he can't help but get excited with the thing you called him. a god. that's what he is to you, right? his hands moving to your neck, his grip thightens around your neck then he sinks your body to water. "hold your breath as long as you can, baby. i wanna see you struggle. don't worry i will be careful that you don't get harmed. and if it's going to be too much just say no, i will understand. " yet you say nothing and with that he forces yor head under the water. the oxygen losing contact with your lungs. you body activates it's panic mode. you try to get out but his grip keeping you suffocated under the water, only thing you can do is just struggle just like he asked. he slowly stops and helps you to come back to surface. "did i hurt you?" you shake your head assuring him that everything is okay. "you did so good for me like a slut perfectly molded for me." you could feel his aroused state.
"maybe i should reward my precious doll. hmm, right?" you get excited with the news. after making sure you both are clean, he lifts you up and carries you bridal style. when he brings you to your room, you both can't help but feel nostalgic. vividly remembering every single time you both sneaked out during trainee days to have some fun here. exploring each other's bodies and your sexualities. beomgyu takes a pride for being the only one that did these things to you. and he is the only one who can. he made sure of it with planting ideas of everyone else being disgusting but him, only he can love you, everyone else is always after their own best interests, they do not care about you, he also scared away whoever men trying to get close to you and most important thing of them all he made himself your god. he was aware of his beauty and he made sure that it is the only thing in your mind, thinking about it nonstop. why did he break up with you in the first place? who knows but believe it he would lose it if someone else touches his property.
after gently placing to your bed, a trail of kisses on your body, especially focusing on the places he can leave marks to claim you once again and show the world you are taken. he goes back and forth between soft sensual kisses and anilmalistic lickerish kisses. once he is satisfied with all of his bite mars around your nect to thighs, he gives your lips a final kiss.
"will you be a dear and spread those legs for me?" you happily obey without any second thinking, leaving beomgyu pleased. his hands immediately travels to your aching core. "hmm, so wet~ ah this boosts my ego, seeing my angel turning into a slut for me. " he comments before thrusting his middle finger into you. "shit, even more thight than i remember. i bet-" he says while his thum starts to massage your clit. "i bet you can't even take my second finger. i don't think you will be able to take my cock, princess. how are you supposed to? look at you so small compared to me~" he says with a scoff. without a warning he adds his second finger and starts to do scizoring motions to get you ready for his size. but with a sudden change of heart, you feel his fingers leaving your hole and he gets up and sits between your legs. "how about my baby gets an orgasm she clearly missed while not being with me, hm?" before you say anything you feel his lips on your clit and his fingers rejoin the party in your cunny. while his fingers thrusting you with a fast and brutual pace, his mouth is way more gentler with your button. your poor finger playing with your clit wasn't enough to make you cum. you don't know why you never tried anything other than that but he is making it up to you with more experienced skills after your break up.
"beomgyu! a-ah too good, too good! ple- please don't stop." you keep repeating like it'sn invocation. feeling overwhelmingly good, it doesn't take too long for you to get close. "cum for me, hun" his voice vibrates on your core and with that your high reaches to you like waves. only being able to pant, you just lay there. beomgyu smiles and gives you compliments. telling you how good you did for him.
before you can regather your consciousness, he makes you sit on the corner of your bed and sits next to you. hands playing with your thighs. he leans towards your ear. "first return the favor and we are talking, okay? and after that i wanna have more fun with you, missed you so much." he whispers. you nod and get on your knees between his legs.
you start with kissing the tip. gosh it has been so long, what if you scupper it up? your hands hugging his member. you slowly start to push your head towards the length. when it reaches to back of your throat, you try your best not to gag. one hand goes to the places that you can't reach to stimulate there too while with your other hand, you play with his balls. trying so hard to be your best. not stoping your tounge swiling and your efforts to suck the soul out of him. apparently what you do is working cuz he turns into a whimpering mess. "that's it baby, just like that like a whore but only for me."
this only encourages you to go deeper making his body to fall back down. "can't believe you haven't done this in more than two years. you are s- so good~" you feel over the clouds with the compliments.
his breath gets heavier when he gets close. manages to say "shallow every- everything that i give you unless you want- ughmp a punishment." right before he relaeses his liquid for you.
laying right beside him, you give him a moment to rest while you try to think of what you are going to say. when he turns his head towars you, he expects you to speak but now you think maybe your problem wasn't that big. when you keep staying silent, he snaps. looking at you with an angry expression he just says "get out with it."
"should i just tell them all at once or-" he interrupts "doesn't matter as long as you get it out off your chest." you keep only looking at him for a little while before you say "it is dumb and i really don't wanna bother-" he interrupts again. "me? you really think it's gonna bother me? you know maybe the only one thing about is your stupid overthinking. i want you to tell. and i don't care if you are comfortable or not. i deserve to know. and if it was that stupid why were you crying like a toddler, hm?" he kisses your cheeks and hugs you. panting your back while giving your face sweet kisses.
"i started it, i thought i was the bad guy. but now i realize that even though i am not innocent, i am the victim, the one who got abused and manipulated." he breaks the connection to see your face. "can you elaborate, darling? who did what to you?" you blink your eyes when you feel them getting dry. beomgyu slightly chuckles to your silliness for forgetting to close your eyes for so long. "go on, i am listening. gosh my silly girl. even missed this."
"i- i don't know why i was doing that, now i find it extremely cringe but i had this similar thing to drug problem." a shocked expression covers his face with the unexpected news. "you did what?" you cringed at yourself even more. "i know it is so dumb but i needed something to cope, you know after we broke up." he smiles "i understand, i wasn't making fun of it or judging. i was just surprised. it is just so unexpected from you. you are scared of authority and public opinion first of all and this thing also hurts people around you and that's where you draw the line. it all is okay though. this doesn't make you a bad person." say says reassuring you.
"yes but i might kinda have shown that little habbit to one of my members and they might have also started it because of me. but i swear i warned her and told her to stop constantly. and i didn't even show or suggest her that. she just saw me doing it one day and she also started to have an addiction it consumed her as a whole. she stopped doing anything productive and always talked about it even when she was not gambling. and i felt guilty." he looks at you with a warm expression this time. "i am starting to see why this is stressing you out that much. and you are talking about 'nincompoop' i am assuming. she was always problematic and a stupid loser. why can't she decide for herself in her age? i don't see the problem here, you are not responsible for an adult who is capable of making her own desicions. "
"i still haven't told you everything..." you stop "okay baby, i was just trying to be responsive. go on, tell me everything, i am listening." you continue "well, later i realized my guilt was unnecessary. i am not victimizing myself, don't get me wrong but she pushed me more into that rabbit hole. you know i am kind of naive-" he interrupts again "not kind of, you are." you speak up. "GYU!" he giggles "i am not calling you dumb, though i can easily get you there with my touch~ you are just too trusting and do not question people around you that much." this time you say nothing, enjoying his teasing but you decide to continue yet again. "since i am KIND OF naive, i started to become the one who is influenced badly rather than being the bad influence. i was rather a casual than an addict. but she was definitely. she then got caught by our manneger. he let it go and told he is not going to tell the ceo. she felt afraid. she was so scared. i felt guilty and promised i will help. she had nothing to be afraid of but you know scared people, they lose it. i suggested her getting help and told her i also will get it even though i have stopped doing it more than a yeand and a half. she stopped cuz she was scared but refused to get help or to do anything to get better."
his hands holding yours, he decide to tease you yet again. "i am guessing the real story starts after this." he feels kinda shocked when you nod. "you know she can easily tell the public, i was the bad influence. and i can't even deny it when she does. she is not stable. i am not making her mental health problems the villain but she never has the good intentions, only wants attention of others even if it's negative. she can easily ruin me, my career. not just me but also the other members. even one can argue that i deserved it and had it coming, you can't tell the same thing about the other girls. they did nothing wrong."
"she was scared that police will find her and she will be put in jail. i told her it has been months. they don't have an evidence even, they can't but instead of listening to me, she found other people's stories online that was not even similar to hers. i kept telling her stop looking at those news or fake stories, she only hurts herself. then i decided to pay an actor for a small role. she was my friend and she accepted it. so i told nincompoop that i had a friend that went through the same thing and her stiation was in a small city, a white lie in my opinion. my friend did everything i asked her to. i know this is way fucked up but i really had the best interest of her. i mean maybe not cause i was getting tired of her clinging on me and constant whining. i wanted to help, really, but she was just... i know she has problems. i am an awful person for instead of understanding her problems, i hate her for them. it is just too much sometimes." you are surprised that he just listened without interrupting even once. you two stay slient for a few minutes before he gathers his thoughts and speaks. "you are not awful. from what i see you tried to help but she started to see you as her therapist. am i right?" you nod then shake your head. honestly you aren't sure what happened between you two. it all feels like a fewer dream.
"i mean maybe you are right or maybe i am not as understanding as i thought i was." he clears his throat. "i think you do way above bare minimum. i really don't trust this girl. wasn't she lying about her mom abusing her, just because her disabled sister got attention while she did not?" you try to defend her. "all people seek attention, gyu. yes her lying was not good but no one got hurt, right? we all are desperate for attention because we all are social creatures so why is she the bad guy?" beomgyu sighs in disbelief. "why are you defending her? no one getting hurt and attention seeking being in human nature doesn't make what she did less wrong but also didn't she hurt you? is that also in human nature?" you get upset with the way he raised his voice at you. seeing your reaction, beomgyu spoke. "i am sorry for raising my voice. it is just you are so naive and i don't like seeing getting hurt, okay? now continue please."
"before i continue, i really need to ask you something. am i a real life bojack horseman for hiring an actor-friend to get what i want." he bursts into laughs when he hears your question. but when he realizes that you aren't joking, he simply says. "no. no, you are not." you giggle and then put your head on his chest.
"gyu, maybe my brain plays games with me but after that she got even worse as if she knew what was i up to. she kept sending me messages of how she was so afraid that police will arrest her and the stories from the internet she read became the only thing she talked about. i said something. it was not a big deal or maybe it was but i said that her trusting her paranoia and the random people on the internet more than me made me hurt and i got offended. i said that just trust me and my friend that went through the same thing. i called some lawyer friends and they said she was totally safe. i wasn't making anything up. i even called a police relative and asked if she is safe and he said yes as long as there is no evidence. and since there is no evidence she was safe. but instead of listening to reason she said and i quote 'i am saying that i am going to k1ll myself and you are making this about you. you are so selfish.' that was never my intention nor the thing i said. but her saying that made me feel selfish. i really don't have any moral compass but if i had one being selfish would be the equivalent of being bad so i felt awful, like i am the worst person ever. i was the one who abused my prescriptions pills which caused her to become a drug addict. i blamed myself but then she confessed that she even took part in drug dealing. i cannot be responsible for that, right? because i never did anything like that even the thing i did i warned her again and again and again. i kept offering professional help even before and after her getting caught. i did my best but she made me feel bad about myself and kept saying 'don't leave me. if you leave, i will end it.' she wanted my constant attention and i am just too tired, gyu." you speak this time without letting him respond until you finished.
he pushes your head up so that he can look into your eyes. "let's just softly ghost her or make her stop talking to you herself. she can't tell anyone you misusing your pills without revealing her substance abuse." you give him a confused look. "how am i supposed to ghost her or never talk to her. we live together, we are in the same band. how will it even work?" beomgyu doesn't respond but instead makes you sit while he keeps his back placed on your bed. though you don't quite get the reasoning behind this, you still want him to play with you as he promised.
he looks ethereal, you think to yourself. how can someone be this beautiful? that moment pushes you to show beomgyu how you worship him. you start with giving him the most passionate kiss he ever had. yor lips longing for his lips for years couldn't care less whose these lips supposed to kiss. you pity the girl yet you do not leave his lips even for a second like a hungry animal.
your kiss trails his whole body. giving every single corner attention they need and complimenting them throughout the way. your soft hands holding his as if they are afraid of losing it again. you don't care about beomgyu's stupid words about people outgrowing each other thing when he dumped you. you two are meant to be yet this thought originally belonged to beomgyu. in his own way, he did this to protect you but clearly he was wrong. what a mess you became after him. it is impossible to not pity you. he doesn't pity you though, he just wants to end your pain while as a giveaway he also gets what he wants.
you proudly look the evidence of kisses you gave filled with desire and little hickeys you covered his stomach with. you trace his bottom half when he stops you. with an easy move he flips you over pressing your body to mattress. his hands holding your arms around your head as if you would escape him if he leaves them. "small little thing~ look how you basically dissappear under me, so cute but it makes me wanna ruin you more, baby. will you let me?" beomgyu's words practically having an incantation effect, you scream your affirmation to him.
his lips immediately attacking yours for a fight for dominance which he obviously is going to win. the taste of his cum being felt by him when you invite his tongue to your mouth. giving him sounds of pleasure and him dueting you sounds, you both feel like you are in heaven.
"such a pretty doll for me to devour~ i bet you would make a great free use fucktoy or a pretty obedient housewife. gosh maybe i should make you one of those." beomgyu says while his right hand trailing down towards your aching pussy. he positions his right hand still taking control over yours.
his two digits playing with your hole with 'come here' and scizoring motions to get you ready, he adds the third one to the party causing a gasp from you. once he feels like you are ready enough to take him, he immediately thrusts into you. he doesn't wait for you to adjust his size. it of course causes some pain following your tears to fall. him only getting more aroused with your tears, his thrusting fastens and gets harder which you don't complain. too lost in the pleasure even with the pain.
it doesn't take you to cum around his dick since beomgyu still remembers your sweet spots to push his member towards to yet it doesn't stop his abuse. his hands moving towards your neck. he gives to much pressure causing you to fight for your breath. "i am not finished, better take it." he says while your body getting close to second orgasm. "cum for me again with me! show me how much you've missed me!" he orders just before you two cum together. his hands leaving your neck to your waist. with an easy move beomgyu manhandles you again on your all fours.
his cock never stopping being hard, he continues his abuse on your poor cunt. overstimulating it making you cockdrunk. beomgyu pulls your hair causing you to moan even louder. he places his other hand on your ass to have a better grip on himself. at this point the only thing you can say is his name while he fucks his cum back into you. enjoying how dumb you got around him, his thrusts fastens. "such a dumb slut. all mine. all mine. all mine. all mine. mine to touch. mine to breed. ugh you can't even respond. you love my cock that much? you can't think of anything but me~" you only being able to understand a little fraction of what he said, you feel the familiar pain building up on your stomach again when he says he is close. you cum around his cock for the third time just before he fills you up again.
he throws himself to your side and brings your back to his chest, spooning you. playing with your hair and giving you compliments not only about the sex you guys had but also your beauty and how angelic you are. he brings you water and makes sure you use the bathroom. he washes your body again. he orders you food you both like. he opens your comfort movie when food arrives. enjoying both the meal and the movie. you two take a nap and when you wake up, seeing him right beside you makes you feel like you are in heaven.
"we should finish our talk." he says leaving you confused. not waiting for a response from you, he says "would you give up everything for me? be my housewife. don't worry i will take care of you and our children." you only get more confused with his words but you nod. what did these have to do with the stiation? he continued. "you will not take the next day pills and you will have my baby. i will marry you. we could be a family and you get your happy ending away from her. since we can't expose her, we can get you away from her." you respond with a "that's dumb but it could also ruin your career. i don't want that. you deserve all the good things, gyu." but he is determined to get what he wants. "then when you get pregnant, we can marry in secret and the company will retire you due to a 'health related complication' i know these all sound dumb but i want you to be mine and mine only. give up everything, run away from your problems even if that's dumb, be with me, start a family with me." you know it all lacks logic but you agree. at the end of the day what would make you two happy is the logical desicion, right?
he smiles when he gets what he wants. he should have found a way to make it sooner but an opportunity came when his lovesick mind was about to go crazy. was he wrong when taking it? beomgyu is never wrong when it comes to you. ready to accept every part of beomgyu.
Tumblr media
disclaimer: this work is of course not written with the intention to show real beomgyu, it is just fanfiction. english is not my first language although i can say i am pretty advanced this work contains ambiguity and incomprehensibility. addition to that some tense clashes. also i know drug is big taboo in korea and also i am not trying to make addicts look bad. if it looked like this, i can edit the story to make it less problematic. i hope you guys don't find it dumb. i originally planned the same conflict with shoplifting or gambling but they sounded cringe...
please do not copy or repost or translate my work. i will put this warning just in case. it is stealing in literal meaning. so please just don't.
i hope you guys enjoyed it~
it is my first full-length fanfic so writing might not be that good so i am apologizing for that. also changed the more darker tone this fic originally had cuz it was all edge no point. but i would really like feedbacks. and i appreciate every single reblog. have a good day! love you all!
taglist: @bomudreamgrl
special thanks to: @/kaespas (cuz if not for her i would have delete most of this fic)
222 notes · View notes
Text
hey did anyone ask for a heavily biased list of s3 worldbuilding headcannons and how i think some of the lifesteal guys interact with each other? no? too bad i was force fed half of this by my brain while trying to go to sleep
cut for length bc it's long sorry not sorry
clownpierce
of course i have to start with clown he is like a bug to me and i'm putting him under a microscope
he is a BEAST. a CREATURE even.
aka he's from the void but no one except ash knows that
the deranged discord thoughts at 2 am said clown is from the void bc everywhere he goes he brings death. he kills. it’s what he does. he kills and he’s fuckin great at it. do you hear me. do you understand.
covered from head to toe in clothing to hide the fact he's from the void. there's a constant slight chill that surrounds him and it's only really noticeable when someone's almost touching him
he never lets anyone get that close anyway besides the occasional handshake or smth bc yeah anyone would be uncomfortable if someone was standing inches away from you. he plays off the cold hands with a poor blood circulation excuse if anyone asks
if he did show skin, his silhouette would be like a black hole where it's completely pitch black, and depending on the angle, he either appears 2d or 3d (very disorienting and unnerving)
this guy does not have a single stable relationship to fall back on. he allies with people for power and not for comradery, and it is So Hard for him to tear down the dozens of walls he keeps up around him because he often finds that when he does, he gets betrayed and left in the dust (mob anon from lifesteal headcannons i am thinking so hard about your submission)
plus it's hard for him to know whether or not this person is allying with him because he's The Deadliest Assassin Blah Blah Blah and they want that safety net/protection or if they genuinely want to ally with him
it takes him a long time to fully trust branzy, and even then he doesn't open up to him about his personal stuff
the mask stays On. Constantly. doesn't matter how much he trusts someone he will never willingly show his face
he and red have a friendly rivalry with the heart economy side of lifesteal, they're both competing for the title of strongest/holder of most hearts or smth like that
ashswag
dude used to be a normal guy way way way way before lifesteal events n stuff but then he fell into the void and came back Wrong
basically instead of dying instantly, he survived for a little bit longer than usual, broke through reality, and saw that everything is just a simulation and everyone is just code, including himself
that fucked him up bad physically and mentally, and his left side is all glitched and void-like now (chronic pain coded)
dude is technically immortal but he never really tested losing all of his hearts yet
he knows that clown is from the void because he knows what the void feels like and is hypertuned to it, and to him, clown RADIATES it like a space heater. he can't stand too close to him and has to have at least one person's width between them. he hasn't confronted clown about it though because he knows when to keep his mouth shut
being close to the void for him hurts in an ocular migraine type way, but he typically pushes through it when he's down at bedrock level or in the end
he doesn't make stable relationships with people because he doesn't really see the point in them
nihilism 100
whatever side he aligns with is usually the one causing the most chaos
branzycraft
evil little meow meow
let him be angry. let him have rage.
he is Just Some Guy (aka normal ass human) but he is so smart
not a fighter but he is a builder and a damn good one at that
need a trap that is sure to kill? branzy
very good at getting the fuck out of situations that would've killed him if he didn't immediately dip when he did
based on vibes alone, early s3 branzy would so be friends with subz and vitalasy (which i think actually happens so i win)
i need branzy to be envious of clown's fighting skill and heart count before he starts warming up to him. please where is the slow burn.
falls out with subz and vitalasy when he starts allying with clown and co, and especially when he tricks vitalasy into the funhouse
during the cleansing when the dirties and team chaos are relatively working together, vitalasy tries to reconcile and pull branzy away from team chaos, but branzy's lost in the power sauce
he and rek are Just Some Guy buddies who exchange near-death experience stories (i need more branzy and rek friendship please please please please please p)
i am ace beaming your clownzy mwahahaha
leowook
strap in boys because have you considered the tension between clown and leo after mob falls (once again mob anon from lifesteal headcannons i am thinking so hard about your submission)
they were tight. they were bros. they were homies. leo was the only person clown felt like he could confide in during mob. and then leo turned coats. i'm SO NORMAL.
clown has NOT forgiven him
super duper a cyborg. he's a tnt minecart pvper he had to have blown off his limbs at some point /silly
but yeah his limbs are mechanical, along with one of his eyes. can't really see it though bc he constantly wears a mask, long sleeves, pants, and gloves. i'll probably default to his left eye if i ever draw leowook face
he and red feel like they would be friends based on vibes
still works/allies with zam after mob in an attempt to go back to what he lost
slaps roof of leowook this bad boy can fit so much mob angst inside of it
princezam
certified Thing. don't know what, he just is
has loony toons vibes. to me.
so annoyingly positive in the eyes of the others, they all want to punch him at least once
hero complex 100
dude just manages to rizz his way into teams
zam is smart. he knows what he's doing.
ok actual serious hcs bro has the most worldbuilding in his explanation tbh
in my head, lifesteal is this independent port city-state that was originally run by everyone and acted as a free, international trade center. zam is the crown prince of the neighboring territory surrounding the city, and when mob started gaining serious power, he charmed his way into working with them.
the deal he struck with mob is that if he wanted to join, lifesteal wouldn't be a part of zam's kingdom and all of his actions in mob were separate from his actions as the prince. it worked out relatively well for both of them: mob got a powerful ally with good political/funding power, and zam got to play hero and get involved with lifesteal politics
when mob fell, he initially respected their previous agreement where he wouldn't play prince in lifesteal, but when heart economics grew too unbalanced in his eyes, he decided to annex the city and then start the cleansing
nobody enjoyed zam annexing the territory, and especially not when his first order of business was to have everyone over ten hearts withdraw and bank them to evenly distribute to people with less than ten hearts
gonna pause here for now bc i feel like if i tried listing another character, it wouldn't have the same heart behind it as these guys do. if anyone does wanna see another silly that i didn't get to here, feel free to shoot me an ask or smth idm :]
fuck cringe i am having a blast i love worldbuilding
76 notes · View notes
Text
capsaicin cookie smut hcs ; 18+
Tumblr media
requested by ; qumau
fandom(s) ; cookie run
fandom masterlist(s) ; hub | specific
character(s) ; capsaicin cookie
outline ; “abt capsaicin cookie rite.. some nsfw?”
warning(s) ; descriptions of genitals, explicit sexual content, references to sadism and public sex acts, references to sharing the reader with other people
minors and ageless blogs will be blocked
very dominant in the bedroom but is more of a playful dominant, using his superior strength to manhandle and toss you around to his heart’s content
is very very vocal and loud in the bedroom — both in regards to actual conversation and the sounds he makes (which primarily consist of moans and groans, especially when he’s close to his orgasm)
happy to go down on you but he gives incredibly messy oral — like his lips, chin and even his eyelashes can end up being covered in your juices/release by the time he’s done
will overstimulate you because he won’t stop until he’s satisfied, pulling you back against him by your hips until you’re trembling and sobbing and your mind is blank beyond the recognition of your pain and pleasure
he’s kind of a walking space heater, so expect things to heat up in a very literal way when you’re having sex — like you’ll end up drenched in sweat and panting from more than just exertion
he has a lot of stamina and can easily go for several consecutive rounds with you — and he can last for a while per round
so expect to end up unable to walk the day after
celebratory sex is a must!
and so are pre-tournament quickies
and sex between training sessions
or consolation blowjobs if he messes up or loses
really he’ll take any opportunity to have sex with you, even making excuses to slip away randomly to have his way with you
he’s pretty average in length but he’s incredibly girthy so expect to be stretched to the brink of insanity and beyond
he isn’t shy about using his teeth in bed and will happily nip, bite, tease and mark you up during foreplay if you ask
loves parading you around when he’s gotten you especially cock drunk and will gloat about how good he is in bed and how hot you are as his partner
in a similar vein; will happily give/receive sex acts in front of others and he’s great at hiding it by distracting people in one way or another (or, if you’re as much of an exhibitionist as him, he’ll draw his competitors’ attention to you)
is a sadist but not extremely so — like he enjoys pain play but most of it usually consists of rougher playful sex rather than the calculated introduction of toys and such
is incredibly confident in his body and would enjoy sending and receiving nudes
and with your permission he’d even show them to others to further gloat about how amazing and sexy you are
he mainly sends bulge pics and pictures of his abs — and his favourite pics to receive are ones where you’re not fully nude but still leaving little to the imagination
would also be eager to record any sex acts you do together if you let him
and would for sure have loads of videos and pictures of you ready for when you’re too busy to take care of him
videos of you giving each other oral (and pictures of your face and chest covered in his cum)
videos of his cock thrusting into your hole and stretching you out
videos of you two going at it everywhere you can in every position you can think off
doggy style in the changing rooms, against the wall in a public shower, mating press in the bed, missionary on the floor of your shared living room, the list goes on
oh and, of course, plenty of pictures of your face when you’re cock drunk and your hole leaking his cum after he pulls out
quickies are a must for him and, whilst he has the stamina to go on for what feels like for ever, they help him get in a better mood for fighting in a competitive setting
he says you’re his good luck charm — but you know he’s just really horny and doesn’t want to get a boner in front of the crowd
isn’t possessive but is romantically exclusive. like he’d let someone else fuck you under his instruction but they can’t do anything without him there — and they especially can’t kiss you
(both of his triple cone cup competitors have taken him up on this — with both claiming it’s for reasons other than what it was really for)
242 notes · View notes
bracketsoffear · 11 months
Text
Tumblr media
Hannibal Lecter & Will Graham (Hannibal) "Hannibal Lecter spends the entirety manipulating the entire plot of the show, from the very first episode to the very last seconds of the show. From the moment he first meets Will in season 1, he realizes he will be the person to find him out as the serial killer the Chesapeake Ripper; so, taking advantage Will’s autoimmune encephalitis, he frames Will for his crimes by inducing seizures and lost time to plant evidence on Will’s person and in his home.
He has the entire FBI convinced of this plot, going so far as to convince them Will is insane- then, when he decides he misses Will, he organizes the killing of the judge and bailiff to get Will released. He spends the rest of the season dating Alana Bloom to use her as his alibi for the killings and hosting dinner parties to get rid of the evidence, often feeding it to the FBI themselves, and tempting Will to get emotionally closer to him. This is about the point in which Will and Hannibal begin working in tandem- as, parallel to this, Will has spent his time in prison acting emotionally vulnerable to draw Hannibal in so he could exact his revenge upon him for what he’s done to Will. When he’s released, he goes to great lengths to exactly fit Hannibal’s ‘idea’ of Will while collaborating with the FBI to get Lecter caught. In season 3, after Will attempts to remove Hannibal from his life, Hannibal surrenders himself to the FBI so that Will would always know where to find him. From prison, Hannibal manipulates a serial killer through phone calls to attempt to kill Will’s wife and son, and Will organizes for another character to get kidnapped and tortured by the serial killer through hiding hints in a news article, all to draw the killer’s attention to him so he can attempt to collaborate with him to release Hannibal from prison. Will shortly draws the serial killer to attack Hannibal and Will’s car during a staged prison transport to free Hannibal, and they escape from the FBI together."
The SQUIP (Be More Chill) "The SQUIP is a tiny supercomputer who helps its host become more socially aware. Problem is, as a computer, it has no regards for its host's actual feelings and relationships and finds individuality threatening to its goal of making its host popular. In the musical, the SQUIP becomes increasingly controlling and abusive. In “Upgrade,” it convinces Jeremy that he must do exactly as it tells him to get Christine by throwing away his old life and relationships, starting with literally blocking out his best friend Michael. At the Halloween Party, the SQUIP puppets Jeremy’s body to prevent him from leaving or resisting when Chloe drunkenly tries to have sex with him, then Rich burns down the house to try and stop the SQUIP while it tortures him. The SQUIP eventually tries to brainwash everybody in school, then on the planet, to become happy, mindless drones all connected through a "social network." It explains its motivations in “The Pitiful Children,” saying “Their operating system's obsolete / So let's complete the chains / And get inside those brains / Let's save the pitiful children.” The SQUIP is a quantum supercomputer, so it's frighteningly good at engineering favorable outcomes for itself. Just for starters, it gets Jeremy and Brooke together by having Jeremy first spark her interest through calculated praise, then accurately predicting (and possibly causing) the death of Eminem and manipulating Jeremy into convincing Brooke that he's a big Eminem fan so that she will try to comfort him, culminating in them making out behind the school. Had it not been for Michael and his obsession with 90s memorabilia, the SQUIP would have enslaved the entire school, and eventually the whole world, almost effortlessly. It has no consideration or care for Jeremy's emotions, or mental health, or that of those around him, and no qualms about causing horrible pain and stripping the students of their free-will. The end of the show implies it's not truly gone, just unable to outright control Jeremy anymore — which fits, given that it's a metaphor for societal pressure to fit in."
154 notes · View notes
gffa · 6 months
Text
Tumblr media Tumblr media
These two pages from Dark Victory have stayed with me ever since I first read it because they're visually hella interesting, I enjoy Tim Sale's art for how stylish it is, but also because every time I see it, I hear the click of a spotlight being turned on, almost like this is a play being acted out. It highlights the connection between the characters, but that it also is shutting everything else out. That makes sense in the moment, Dick just watched his parents die, there's nothing else in the world for him. Bruce is reliving his own trauma of having watched his parents die, as well as watching another child go through the same thing--but, in a way I can't shake, it almost feels like Bruce is intruding on this moment, too. That Dick's loss gets interpreted as a mirror of Bruce's loss--Dark Victory goes to great lengths to hammer home that parallel, it is not at all subtle about it:
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
But what strikes me about the moment of the Graysons' deaths is that it feels almost like a play being acted out, that Bruce becomes part of it because they mirror each other so strongly, that for all they grow as individuals and come to love each other as uniquely different people, they will always be rooted in this mirroring of each other. Bruce isn't just a bystander to Dick's loss and grief, it fundamentally connects them and defines them--that in many ways Dick understands Bruce the best because, as Dick says about himself, when he was Robin, he was smaller than everyone else, so he had to learn to read people better, to know what they were going to do, because Dick was with Bruce the longest, because Dick and Bruce often are the most similar. But it's also that Dick understands Bruce best because Bruce allowed him in because of this mirror, that sometimes it feels like Bruce only understands people through the lens of his own grief, that's why Dick's the closest to him, because Dick shares that same loss. This isn't to undercut that Dick was a bright, lively child who brought laughter and joy because that is also absolutely true and I will fight tooth and nail anyone who says otherwise. Bruce loves that kid because Dick refused to not be loved, because he's not the same as Bruce, he's brighter, he's better, he's more in so many ways. Bruce and Dick's relationship isn't just one thing or another, there are times when it borders on almost being kind of healthy and then there are times when it's toxic as hell, yet it's always underscored by how much they genuinely love each other, how Bruce keeps thoughts of Dick in his mind to turn to for solace just like he turns to thoughts of his own father, how Dick demands to be worth just as much to Bruce's parents even when they've traveled into the future to be directly in front of him, and Dick gets that worth from Bruce. But sometimes I think about that panel, I hear a spotlight clicking on in my head, I think about Bruce unintentionally inserting himself into this moment of Dick's loss and how Bruce sometimes holds him closer to his heart because Dick's hurt mirrors his own so much. How sometimes Bruce sees the world through that lens of trauma and only how much people can understand it, that the rest of the world drops away and is nothing but black, empty space, except him and the person who understands his hurt.
That I can look at that panel and see it as its meant to be--a moment of pure connection, "I understand what you're going through, I can't take it away, but I can be here with you." and how that saved Dick Grayson's life, how it allowed him to heal and grow and thrive. I can see Bruce's heart breaking because he would have done anything to save this kid from that pain. And sometimes I can look at it and see Bruce watching a horrific play unfold before him and relating to it through his own issues, rather than true empathy. Ultimately, it's really more that they're kindred spirits, that's what the follow-up pages show, that Dick goes through the same process that Bruce went through, he does the same things Bruce did, all while Bruce isn't there to influence him into that at all. Dick is his own person, Bruce couldn't make him be a copy of Bruce if he'd wanted to, he couldn't even win an argument with a nine-year-old about putting on a costume and fighting crime with him and absolutely not staying out of the line of fire. Dick Grayson did what he was going to do, Bruce had nothing to do with making him into that person. But part of the reason they're such an interesting dynamic is because they're not just purely one thing or another, that for all that at the end of the day, Dick and Bruce are naturally like each other in a lot of core ways, it's also possible to read them as unhealthy co-dependent on each other, that them being everything to each other comes with some sharper edges, especially when Bruce sometimes resents Dick for growing beyond him and leaving him, even while desperately proud of him at the same time.
Tumblr media
It's a thing Bruce struggles with a lot when it comes to Dick and I think of this tangled web of emotions every time I see that second splash page above. That Bruce came to love this kid as a son, but also as someone who understood what it was like to live with that kind of devastating loss, and how hard Bruce connected with that--and then how hard it was to let him go, when Bruce can't let go of his parents. That it's hard for Bruce to see Dick grow beyond being the son who understood him best, who mirrored his tragedy best, and he'll do it, he loves his kid enough to keep climbing back up out of that desire to hold onto him as his reflection even if he falls back into it sometimes, that some part of him will always see Dick as the one who had that connection that blocked the rest of the world out and understood him in a way no one else could.
94 notes · View notes
eemoo1o-tfrmoo · 7 months
Text
FanFriday #1: Fanfiction and the art of Snotlout and Hookfang.
For our first FanFriday, I will be looking at one of our arguably best rider-dragon duos: Snotlout & Hookfang! This post was originally going to be a one off, made around the 7th of this month, but I decided to make it into our first instalment of FanFriday instead.
Today, this list (one of many surrounding the duo, I’m sure) will only include works with just the Hookfang & Snotlout tag, so we won’t be covering fics with them as the main focus but other relationships tagged here.
Tumblr media Tumblr media
It Aches So Bad by WhoIsWren — This is the first in a Snotlout and Hookfang based series titled Hook, Don’t Sink. This particular piece concerns the RoB episode Viking for Hire. In Snotlout’s POV, it accounts how Snotlout feels about his and Hookfang’s developing distance due to Hookfang’s toothache. It, as well as the rest of the work series, also involves Spitelout’s pressure on his son to be the best, and the author puts stress on Hookfang’s species as that applies to Spitelout’s demands. We also have some wholesome, platonic soulmate-esque cuddles once all is resolved and that makes everything bittersweet, though mostly sweet.
Tumblr media
Loyalty At Heart by WhoIsWren — This is currently the last work in the aforementioned series. Here, it is in Hookfang’s POV during his panic when Snotlout goes missing in Sandbusted. The premise is sweet, and the writing is sweeter, and you get to see how Hookfang truly feels about his rider when he isn’t around and in danger.
Tumblr media
How To Care For Your Dragon by TulipFluff — This fic is short but sweet, just like the last, but we return to Snotlout’s POV to account how Snotlout grooms Hookfang and how Hookfang lets him (an act of appreciation). In the background, Snotlout’s Terror, Pain (now named Lockjaw), from Worst In Show also makes an appearance. It’s always nice to see the inner-workings of these two’s relationship, even if the work itself isn’t psychoanalytical. What a lovely read!
Tumblr media
On Trust by piratesPencil — This fic has a very unique approach to Snotlout and Hookfang’s relationship: Hookfang being glad that Snotlout is one short potato. Accompanying this insight is reflection on how Vikings used to treat dragons in comparison to now. This work is perhaps the sweetest, maybe even my favouritest out of the bunch, because of how interesting the base concept is. If you’re only going to select one out of this list, I think it’d have to be this one.
Tumblr media
Gift of the Monstrous Nightmare by sarahenany & Thursday26 — This fic is a bit long, but it is definitely worth the read! Here, it includes emphasis on Spitelout and Snotlout’s relationship (as well as some mention of Spitelout’s treatment towards the wife), but mostly involves Snotlout and Hookfang. Hookfang here also speaks Dragonese written in broken English and he and Snotlout do have some conversations back and forth which is a signature theme in sarahenany’s works. It can be a bit distracting, but I think the broken English was done in just the right amount for a fic this length. Overall, this fic includes some great Snotlout and Hookfang moments, and righteous Spitelout slander. (Plus some sweet Fishlegs moments and some Gothi musings.) What a delightful read!
Tumblr media Tumblr media
Main | FAQ | AO3
Tumblr media Tumblr media
FanFriday
69 notes · View notes
blakeswritingimagines · 11 months
Text
Dating Yandere Steve Harrington Would Include:
Tumblr media
Obsessed like he’ll do anything to be around you. His obsession comes from the fact that you are the first real person who ever acknowledged him after a lifetime of being ignored. If anything happens to you he goes insane. And goes into a revenge scheme of hunting down anything or anyone that hurt or would hurt you. His love for you is so strong that he would literally die for you, just to make sure you were okay, or to save you from whatever caused you harm.
He gets jealous very easily. Especially if you were with anyone else, like Jonathan or Billy. He would go into a blind rage and cause them harm. His obsession is so strong that he stalks you, and tries to control everything you're doing so you won’t get hurt. His life is basically dedicated to her, and her well-being.
He is incredibly protective over you, and anyone who is even remotely close to you is at risk of a possible encounter with Steve. He is not afraid to speak up and voice his opinion if he feels you are in danger, or if a person could be using you. He's extremely territorial when it comes to you, which often involves other males you might know or be closer with, and his jealousy becomes almost uncontrollable. He makes sure you are safe at all times, which he often goes to great lengths to ensure. 
Around you he’s so incredibly loveable, he’s so kind, caring, and just super protective of you. He’d do anything to make you happy. But to others, especially the people that are mean to you, he’s really cold to them. He’s not afraid to stand up for you, and if it comes to it he will get violent to make sure nobody and nothing hurts you.
Physical, definitely physical attention! He loves to hold you close, spend time alone with you, or just do romantic things with you. The more time he can have with you the better. He wants to make sure you're happy, makes sure you feel loved and safe, and wants to ensure that nobody can be hurting you, or even getting to you without facing his wrath. His arms are always wrapped around you, and his body is forever pressed against yours. He’ll hold you so close, he doesn’t care when people see, he’s not ashamed, he’s happy, and loves to hold his person.
He’d probably go insane, and just lose all control or common sense if you ever tried to leave or break up with him. If he was able to find you, he might not even let you speak. He’d want answers, and to ensure that you were safe and okay (in his mind, he knows best when it comes to you and what you need). He’d do all he could to make sure you didn’t leave and stayed with him, he’d be relentless in his pursuit to make sure you never left, he’d be broken inside. He’d make it his mission to prove to you that he can be better for you, that he’d do anything for you, and that you’d be happy with him. After a long battle of trying to help you see how great he can be for you, and that he’ll do anything for you if you still said there’s no way he’d be completely gutted.
The dynamic is very loving. He’s always trying to cheer you up or make you feel loved even if he goes overboard. Even going as far as staying by your side to help you through tough moments. He’s very patient and understanding like he’ll sit with you and just talk about your day. He’ll listen to any rants you have because when you feel heard it gives you some form of comfort and makes you happy as you've been heard. He feels like he’s your rock, and your his.
You are so much more than a person to him, you're his everything. His angel, his love. He’ll never leave you. I’ll always defend you, protect you, and try his best to keep you happy. When you smile, it melts his heart. And if ever you cry he feels the pain in that too, and would do anything to see your smile again.
He'd be jealous, angry, and he'd show whoever tried getting your attention, by saying "Don't touch her, talk to her, or even think about them." He'd want to kill them, but he couldn't kill anyone, so he'd have to restrain himself and just try and keep him away from you at all costs he'd be devastated if you moved on to someone else. So he'd keep whoever away at any cost. He might try and stalk them, keep them from going out with you.
As a yandere, Steve is obsessive, controlling, and protective. He's always watching and waiting, ready to step in at the first sign of trouble. He'll go to any lengths necessary to ensure that his darling is never, ever hurt. He's also incredibly possessive and will do whatever it takes to keep his darling all to himself. This includes isolating you from anyone he believes is a possible threat, even going so far as to physically attack others he perceives as a rival.
Steve is an intense and twisted embodiment of his normal bubbly, friendly self. While he always cares about your well-being, Yandere Steve is quick to become paranoid about your intentions. He becomes jealous easily and is overly protective, resorting to violence if you do anything to hurt his feelings. His passion for you becomes controlling and manipulative, leading to a volatile cycle of love and violence.
Steve has a tendency to be very clingy most days he can be around you, and he wants to spend every waking moment with you. He often overloads you with affection and attention, which can be overwhelming for the other person. He'll do things like constantly texting, calling and asking for updates on where you are, and he'll show up unexpectedly if he feels that you're pulling away or becoming distracted. Steve's obsession with you can turn into possessiveness, and he'll try to control your activities, who you hang out with, and even what you wear.
Steve is very intense on dates, and he wants everything to be absolutely perfect. He'll go overboard with the food, the flowers, and the gifts, and he'll spend hours upon hours making sure everything is perfect especially since his parents have the money for it. Steve is someone who will go above and beyond to make you feel special, and it's important to him that you feel happy and appreciated. He'll make sure to listen to everything it is that you say and really pay attention to what you want, and he's happy to do whatever it takes to make the date extra special.
His parents just kind of roll their eyes, or ignore it. Because his parents are pretty much useless and are more focused on their careers and making more money. They’ve left him to run around with his friends whenever he wants or whatever else it he wants. The only thing that gives him solace is you. So if anything happens to you, he loses it, and just goes off the deep end and gets insane. His mental state is extremely fragile.
He would be devastated if you ever tried to leave, as you have become his whole life, is the center of his existence. He would want to talk you out of it. Explain why you can’t leave him, how it would destroy him. He would try and convince you that you can not, and that it wouldn’t be right, how if you really care about him you can’t leave, and that if you go, you will realize you made a huge mistake and will beg to come back.
He didn’t know he was a yandere at first. One day you both just started talking and talking and talking. He never wanted to stop. You started hanging out all the time and he started to see why he was feeling what he was feeling. It was your smile, it was your laugh, it was your eyes. Once he realized what he was, he started becoming scared because maybe you’ll think he was crazy, and so he kept so much hidden and close to himself. He would do anything to win your love.
By constantly being involved with your life, by getting to a point where you depend on him in so many ways that you cannot live without him. You become everything to him. And it’s not a healthy love, it’s obsession and it’s destructive and possessive, but there is a twisted passion that makes it seem almost ok. He’ll be there for you constantly, for all the good and the bad. He’ll be your rock and your strength, he’ll be the reason for your happiness and your source of sadness.
Your scent is a drug to him. The moment you decide to switch perfumes, he's the first to notice. Steve can't help it when he takes something that smells like you and uses it to pleasure himself and believed that doing this would subdue his urges before he started dating you, but all it has done is intensify his desire for you.
I’ll be frank - it’s seeing jealousy on the face of his significant other. It’s a type of power, a control, that is absolutely exhilarating that he gets off on and feels it proves you really do belong to each other.
He usually plays a fairly dominant role in your sex life but he can’t deny the fact that he occasionally enjoys it when you take control instead. He’s not too fond of you ordering him around but he does like it when you act all soft with him and treat him lovingly; taking his mind off of whatever’s bothering him by demanding his full attention.
Eye contact. He wants you to keep your eyes trained on him no matter what he does and watches your face every time he does something to you; committing all of your pleasure-filled reactions to memory.
Edging. Hearing you beg and seeing you desperate for him as he keeps you just on the brink of ecstasy affects him more than words can describe.
134 notes · View notes
glasskey · 2 months
Text
Lawrence & June's Mix tape Vol. 2
This mix tape contains easily my favourite Lawrence and June moments and it takes us all the way from the shadowy hallways of Lawrence’s abode to the far reaches of Canada.
Tumblr media
I'll bet that felt good.
From the moment we meet Eleanor, she is seen constantly stifling a mouthful of secrets and covering up improprieties, like dead bodies with a pretty new flower bed. She’s the voice of Lawrence’s conscience and he does just about everything he can to keep her out of harm’s way. In the episode Unknown Caller we learn that Lawrence was once young and sensitive, partial to making Eleanor mixtapes, far from the shell of a man who now keeps her hidden.
Tumblr media
After June and Eleanor’s jaunt down to Hannah’s school, Lawrence notices the fresh air and sunlight has done Eleanor the world of good. Consequently he asks June to start spending some time with her to hopefully alleviate the effect, the horror show he calls home, is having on his wife.
Tumblr media
Never one to miss a trick, June takes the opportunity here to really stick the knife in Lawrence and give it a nice deep twist. Given the delicate state of his wife, why hasn’t he gotten her out? Doesn’t he realize he’s killing her with his own creation? June’s not asking questions, rather confronting Lawrence with the truth of what he already knows. Lawrence looks like he’s been hit, she’s found a deep painful recess where his guilt festers every single day. There’s no rage, no threat, nothing except suddenly the appearance of a deep wound as Lawrence chokes out the words “I bet that felt good”.
Tumblr media
It seems both a dig at her for being so underhanded and an acknowledgement that June has so very many, many justifiable grievances. I mean who could blame her for wanting to indulge in a little knife twisting after so many years of abuse? June’s stay in Lawrence abode is simultaneously therapeutic, illuminating and empowering to say the least. Prior to this Gilead had been a nameless, faceless construct. Now June’s like Dorothy finally discovering what a huge liar the Wizard of Oz actually was, just a sad old man with a slight of hand and a world full of regret.
It came for you.
Tumblr media
Lawrence has constantly argued the merits and rewards of Gilead with June, always assuming that he would never have to bear any of the costs, but this is the moment that he finally has to pay the piper. Lawrence is extremely skilled at psycho analysis of all those around him, but he can barely stomach the hideous reflection in the mirror. The fact is he’s a whole lot of talk and not much action, in other words, Lawrence isn’t a TRUE believer. If he was he would participate in the ceremony and he would demand compliance from Eleanor. From the get go their relationship appears different; he loves her, dotes on her, fiercely protects her and Junes attempts to manipulate him through acts of infidelity are brutally rebuffed. Eleanor is the figurative voice of conscience calling from beneath the floorboards, and it’s no coincidence that Lawrence goes to great lengths to keep her away from official guests lest she blabs.
Tumblr media
During the forced ceremony she screams and wails loudly, Lawrence pleads for her to be quiet, pledging his undying love and begging for her forgiveness for doing the one thing he swore he would never do. It’s all for naught, Eleanor is absolutely inconsolable, he promised this would never happen. It’s fucking heartbreaking to see Eleanor’s incredible distress at what is about to happen to June, she’s fragile, helpless and utterly cornered. Ironically it is June who soothes her and leads Lawrence through what must be done.
Tumblr media
This ceremony engineered by Fred, is the moment that directly results in Eleanor’s death in later episodes. This scene elicites the devastatingly cool and casual “at least it wasn’t you” mic drop from June, and undoubtedly earned Fred a blind eye from Lawrence as Nick dragged him off to die. During S3 we observe a growing if not begrudging respect for June from Lawrence and the idea that he now has to rape this woman in front of his beloved wife is utterly horrifying. June sits waiting calmly for the inevitable, she understands this moment of panic and trauma all too well, and above all the absolute futility of fighting it. This is the moment that Gilead in its full walking womb, horror show glory “Comes to his door”, and rips the veil off Lawrence’s illusions. His wife is the voice of empathy and conscience and he finally understands, his monstrous creation will surely kill her sooner or later. As Lawrence and June share a drink, he offers June a way out and a means of escape for his wife, but as we later learn, tragically it’s too little too late. The deed is done and for the remaining seasons Eleanor will haunt Lawrence’s every step
You really think this is still your house?
Tumblr media
The beginning of the episode Mayday scares the absolute shit out of me, June is just getting her first introduction to Gilead, watching women being brutally categorized as she is herded into the back of a truck. June begs for help, the guard remains indifferent. The entire scene reeks of desperation, fear and dark unknown territory. Deep trauma lives here. “To the ruthless go the spoils” June muses, so what is she willing to do to get 52 children out of Gilead? Everything it seems, for her power now lies in her willingness to die for her cause. June officially has nothing to lose and everything to gain; she doesn’t know where Hannah is and Nick is very likely dead. For a dictatorship like Gilead that relies on fear to maintain order, individuals like these that inspire leadership, are a fucking nightmare.
Tumblr media
The minute June returned from the hospital, super twitchy and scheming gleefully about escape plans openly, Lawrence should have known his power was a thing of the past. From the very first shot of this end of season showdown between June and Lawrence, it’s obvious he’s not going to win this one. June sits at the head of a long dining table with a gun in the center like her sword laid out for battle. Lawrence ever the expert in human behavior, senses June’s dangerous instability. He tries to gently navigate her and wrestle back control without enraging her further. She plays with her gun like she’s twirling her hair, musing over the brutal injustice of being a woman in Gilead.
Tumblr media
“This is still my house, young lady” he stammers pathetically in the face of her frightening new found power. “You really think this is still your house?” she scoffs, his home is festering with rebels and his previous authority now means nothing. As Osborn so eloquently warned him at the start of the season “they’ll put you on the wall, even a commander”. With the words “get me a fucking map”, Osborne makes it clear that not only will Lawrence be steering clear of their plans, he WILL help facilitate them. The reality is Lawrence willingly relinquished his control the minute he adopted the most notorious handmaid in Gilead and turned his home into a half-way house for rebels. “You’re not going to be any trouble are you?” Lawrence asks June when she first arrives “No sir” she replies, but make no mistake, news of June Osborne had reached his gilded prison long ago.
Tumblr media
Gilead's gonna Gilead.
In S5 the boundaries between Canada and Gilead began to get a little hazy, with audiences wondering why Lawrence was able suddenly to stroll in and out of Canada. As we later discovered this blurring of the lines was an intentional device used to demonstrate Gilead’s ability to seep across the border. At the inception of New Bethlehem, Lawrence shows up on June’s doorstep to ask for her help to make it look legit. She’ll get to live there with Nick, Luke, Hannah and Nicole, like one big Gilead sized Brady bunch, but there’s just one catch; Hannah still has to do the whole “child bride” thing. She’s seriously conflicted, understandably she is desperate to be with her child but this is a bridge too far. She pleads with Lawrence to stop it and he shrugs it off with an almost resolute “Gilead’s gonna Gilead”. June launches into a blistering attack about how he’s responsible for all of Gilead’s horror but apparently she’s not telling him anything he doesn’t already know.
Tumblr media
“I was trying to save humanity…..and I did it, I fucking did it, then it got away from me….it went septic”. Lawrence is calculating and manipulative, however June always manages to pry out his emotional core and here he finally breaks down admitting the incredible weight of his conscience. He can barely live with himself; Gilead’s like a wound and Lawrence is desperately trying to stop the rot. Currently Gilead looks like a U.N. nightmare, but perhaps given a generation or two the fanaticism may ease up just a wee bit, he argues to a skeptical June. Hannah might get the short end of the stick but Nicole won’t. He needs June’s thumbs up if he wants to actually get any outside residents to pull up sticks and move there.
Tumblr media
But Lawrence also needs HER, he knows that in the larger scheme of things Osborne gets shit done. Lawrence may have built the village, but he’s certainly smart enough to realize that it was the gutsy little handmaid who managed to smuggle out a planeload of children, when all he’d done was sit around in his dusty old house for nigh on a decade.
Cups of sugar
Tumblr media
Make no mistake, this IS the Lawrence and June break up scene and it’s no coincidence that next episode Nick and Lawrence break up too. Here the gloves are off, Lawrence tries to lure her with the promise of Hannah and Nick, but in exchange he demands she relinquish her pride and forsake her beliefs. June is enraged that they are being used as bartering chips. It’s crystal clear in this moment that just as Lawrence has the power to withhold Hannah from June, so too he holds Nick firmly in his clutches.
Tumblr media
Lawrence’s reference to Nick and June’s relationship to “a cup of sugar” is dropped as a humorous quip but it’s insultingly reductionist and he knows it. Just as living next door to her enslaved daughter should be enough, an affair with the man she loves should also suffice. As far as Lawrence is concerned, June should be grateful, just as Nick should be grateful for his pseudo family in the burbs, why can’t they just be happy with the scraps?
Tumblr media
June doesn’t pull any punches, here she tells him point blank that his dear departed wife had died from the heartbreak of the man he’d become. She reveals she’d watched Eleanor die and did nothing to stop it. Despite his existing suspicions, Lawrence is devastated by June’s admission none the less. I was reminded of the June and Serena break up scene in S3 in which they both collapsed into a smoldering, teary wreck of raw brutal truth. Lawrence spent both S4 and 5 trying to become “a better man” but ultimately he couldn’t help himself. He’s a political animal, and after losing Eleanor, giving Gilead a nice little make over was pretty much all he had left to live for. Lawrence knew that Nick and June were desperate to be a family again and he used it for currency to bring one of Gilead’s most notorious rebels to heel, and hopefully his own life some meaning.
Tumblr media
Instead of thanking him for his offer, June promptly disintegrates into an inhumane fit of furious rage. Lawrence’s proposal of a life half lived in New Bethlehem is nothing but an attempt to bend June to Gilead’s will once again, and a way to hopefully finally ease his conscience. I was always confident in Lawrence’s abilities to maneuver pieces across the board, but watching June literally frothing at the mouth and seething with venom, I couldn’t help but wonder if maybe Lawrence hadn’t gotten just a tad bit greedy this time, and bitten off more than he could chew.
Join me next time for a Mixtape from our favourite S4 and 5 bromance: Nick and Lawrence.
20 notes · View notes