#and has for decades

[melonsap]

Important rules/tips I've learned as an adult that helped with anxiety

If people are mad at you, it's their responsibility to tell you, not your responsibility to guess

If they're mad at you in secret anyways, they're the ones in the wrong, not you

If people don't like what you're doing, it's their responsibility to tell you

If they say it's fine when it's really not, they're the ones in the wrong, not you

People are allowed to be wrong about you

If they are wrong about you, wait for them to bring it up, because if you try to, you will inevitably overcorrect

Some people are committed to misunderstanding you. You will not win arguments against them. Yes, even if you explain your point of view. They do not care. Drop it

The worst thing that will happen from a first-time offense is being told not to do it again. Maybe with a replacement if you broke something

You can improve relationships and gauge willingness to talk to you by giving compliments. It's like a daily log-in bonus and nobody thinks twice about it

Most things are better after you sleep on them

Most things are better after you have a meal

Most things are better after you shower

Your brain makes up consequences that are irrational. If the worst DOES come to pass and someone acts like they do in your head, they are overreacting, and you are entitled to say "what the fuck"

If your chest hurts after you feel like you've made a social error, that's called rejection-sensitive dysphoria. It means your anxiety is so bad that it's causing you physical pain, which is a good indicator that you're overreacting. Tense yourself, hold it for 20 seconds, let it go, then find a distraction

If you're suddenly angry at someone after you feel like you made a social error, that's also rejection-sensitive dysphoria. You are going to feel annoyed about it for awhile, but being genuinely pissed off is your anxiety trying to find something to blame to take the responsibility off your shoulders, and getting scared because it can't justify itself. Deep breaths, ask yourself how much you ACTUALLY want to be angry at that person, then find a distraction

"Sour grapes" is more healthy for you than stewing. Deciding you don't like someone who's perpetually annoyed with you, won't talk to you, etc. makes letting go of anxiety over them easier

If people don't like you, they will find reasons to be annoyed with you when they otherwise wouldn't. If people do like you, they will find reasons NOT to be annoyed with you when they otherwise would. People do not ping-pong between the two

You DO have to make a conscious choice not to think about something. If you're having trouble circling back to it, say out loud that you're done thinking about it and why. Then find a distraction

When you're upset, part of you is going to want to make false bids for attention (suddenly texting differently, heavy sighs, etc. but when someone asks you about it, you tell them it's nothing). Do not listen to it. You gain nothing from it except more misery

People like to help people they care about. It makes them feel good about themselves

If you think you're insufferable for needing help, see above. Yes, really. They get a serotonin kick from it

If you think you're insufferable for mannerisms you have, you either have to consciously choose not to do them, or accept that they're part of the package that comes with you. Being apologetic about existing does nothing except make you more miserable

If you do things you don't like when you feel meh about it, it makes it easier to do them when you hate it

If you avoid things you don't like when you feel meh about it, it reinforces and magnifies how bad it feels when you hate it

Seriously. Read those last two points again. If you can make yourself make a phone call when you've got nothing to lose, you will slowly lose that panic you get when you have to make a phone call you haven't prepared for. You do have to CONSCIOUSLY take that step

Hobbies that make you care for something get rid of that nagging feeling that you're not doing enough. Go grow some rosemary

If you don't engage with your hobbies regularly, you will feel miserable, and anxiety will spike

Hobbies are things that give you a bit of happiness. They do not have to be organized or named to do that. Go be creative in something. Play with coins. Make up lists. Start a new WIP

No one cares what you look like

If people point out things they don't like about how you look unprompted, they are being rude. You are entitled to say "what the fuck"

People who like you will find you pretty to some degree. Minor things about your appearance go completely unnoticed. Literally, scars and dots and blemishes do not register to someone who likes your company

You looking at yourself in the mirror is 10x more closely than anyone is going to look at you

If you're anxious about your body type, and you're creatively inclined, make/write an oc with that same shape. Give them nice things and make other characters love them. Put them on adventures. You'll start to see yourself in the mirror more kindly

You care about wording and perfect lines/colors way more than anyone who views your work ever will

Sometimes when you're upset, you're going to feel like not eating. Do not do that. Not eating makes you more miserable

Same with things you normally enjoy. Denying yourself helps no one. You are punishing yourself for being sad. Stop it

Both of these will take conscious decision to break the habit of. Make yourself do it anyways, and it will slowly get easier

And again, to reiterate: If someone is mad at you, it is THEIR responsibility to tell you, not your responsibility to guess

#anxiety #long post #i have been an adult for the better part of a decade and it has gotten SO much easier as i internalized these #swearing tw

[sayaberry]

being completely and utterly normal about the bombshell that just dropped

#HOW THE FUCK DOES HE KEEP GETTING AWAY WITH IT #anyway for those who don't know; toby fox managed to get an interview with yume nikki creator who is literally infamous not doing them #and not only interviews. kikiyama has been nearly if not totally completely radio silent FOR NEARLY 2 DECADES since yume nikki came out #toby fox wielding his immense power for good and i respect it. i also respect kikiyama's denny's order #yume nikki #undertale #deltarune

[kopawz]

mario has to be informed on who chris pratt is, and is disappointed

#mario #super mario #like mario would try and be nice like *ohhhh i bet he is just starting out! we all start out that'sa ok!* #and luigi tells him that *mario. he has just been like this for two decades along with being a terrible person* #and mario does the game over sound effect and loses a life

[catmask]

with that said there are characters that a fat maybe not canonically but they are spiritually. to me. they may not be drawn that way but i know whats true. ive seen it like a sort of prophet

#serizawa. send post #he did NOT live his life as a shut in for almost a whole decade to be drawn SKINNY! not by me at least #also like so many characters over the age of 30. no more fit moms and dads GIVE them that divorce body fat NOW! #*strikes you down with the force of god* #but honestly alternative for serizawa that ive always liked is that he gains weight when he starts working for reigen #because he can now go out and eat new foods :D he has actually gained an appetite because he's moving around more #and isnt just eating like instant ramen or whatever his mom brings him #see how easy it is you can just believe it with your heart. you just have to find the ways to make true waht u know #scratchpost #txt

[wombywoo]

retired 🩶

#call of duty #cod #simon ghost riley #john soap mactavish #soapghost #my art #listen this took me like two weeks so y'all better appreciate 🤌 #johnny is the super active DIY father of the family #simon has made his way through all of the miss marple mysteries and has now set his sights on naval fiction #also growing his fringe out to hide the early onset baldness #johnny has gorgeous hair but we knew that #the dogs are called roger and wee albert--guess which is which #yes they all sleep in the same bed~ #I guess I just need to see these two old and cranky and alive for whatever reason... #let them both burn in hell after a few good decades learning how to live beyond just surviving #god they probably make a banger pot roast....

[bluegiragi]

mr riley.

early access + nsfw on patreon

#simon has a lot of reasons for his endless well of self-hatred #but the first seeds were definitely planted by him looking a lot like his shitty dad. #in this au his dad is still alive #but they haven't talked in decades. and wont ever again #also ppl who are paying attention will notice that this flashback is when ghost got the scar over his eyebrow #simon ghost riley #manuel roba #monster 141 au #giragi art

[puppetmaster13u]

Prompt 271

“Grandmother is visiting,” Damian suddenly said with no warning and with his usual not-quite demanding tone. 

“Who?” Tim wasn’t the only one to startle, seeing as Bruce had practically froze, a downturn to his lips in a silent show of confusion. 

Damian scowled. “Are you deaf Drake? Grandmother is coming to Gotham to, quote, make sure I am being properly cared for.” None of them had known that Ras was with anyone actually. At least Tim was pretty sure that would have been in the files. 

“Oh?” Dick didn’t quite crouch to Damian’s height but it was a near thing. “She-” “He,” Damian corrected, interrupting him. They all exchanged a glance before Dick continued. 

“Is he coming to the Manor or…” 

Damian scoffed again, a tiny bit of a flush against his face. “No, Grandmother will most likely be staying with Akhi-”

Now wait one moment-

“YOU HAVE ANOTHER BROTHER?!” 

#DCxDP #DPxDC #Prompts #Deadly Decisions #Danny & Ras are the homoerotic rivals that no one knows if they’re flirting or attempting a murder #It’s actually both they’re just also both Immortal #Danny to Jason: You can become a crime lord if you finish college- you’ve said you wanted to get a degree this is ur chance #Dusan (nodding): Mother has made all of us finish at least our basic education nephew #Why yes this does mean that RH has just made the heads in a duffel bag debut & the bats have no clue it’s Jason #Normally Danny wanders the universe but RAS (affectionately derogatory) HOW DARE U TRY TO HIDE THE GRANDCHILDREN #Morally Gray Danny #He’s well over 300 and that has an affect lol #Also has some fun fae vibes thx to his ghost half & human half finally balancing out #Let Jason & Damian be brothers #Tiny Damian: Akhi look I found a frog :> #Jason (newly not brain damaged & has no clue who this small child is): …. That’s great #Tiny Damian: *GASP* Akhi you can talk now :D #Fuck it- all the Al Ghuls deserve fangs from ecto contamination #Is Danny actually Dusan & Talia’s mother? No one knows and no one wants to ask the probably immortal fae being okay #Danny brought Damian a ghost hound puppy & Jason an original signed Pride & Prejudice book #How come Bruce wasn’t aware of Danyal? Talia forgot to inform him that the mother she was speaking of is in fact still alive #He disappears for a decade sometimes longer she was using past terms how was he supposed to know

[ionomycin]

it's you, after all

#artists on tumblr #rainweaver #i never draw these two but they've been living in my brain for over a decade #the lady is called Lacuna #and her variably human bf is called Mirha #she's a certified monster smoocher #when and where and how will i find the time to make this webcomic finally #rainweaver has been marinading in my head since i was 16 #i'm almost 30 #how does one make a webcomic in this economy

[keekry]

mizu sketches :)

#they’re like #the stealth champion of all the kendo competitions out there #and taigen is furious about it #has been trying to get mizu to join the kendo club for Forever #has resorted to just tagging along to mizu’s comps and yelling angrily and supportively from the stands #he’s generously not participating himself to let them win of course #one day they’ll have the showdown of the decade and then it’ll all be over #just wait #blue eyed samurai #fanart #blue eye samurai

[starbuck]

reading and watching “classic” books and films is such an interesting experience because, before you get into them, when you only know them by name and maybe the vaguest plot outline, they’re intimidating and stuffy and up on a pedestal, but then you finally take the leap and check them out and realize that almost every story that’s achieved such a legendary level of popularity did so because something in its emotional core reached out and grabbed a lot of people by the throat and you are NOT immune.

#not that anyone but me probably needs to hear this but… #it’s OKAY to have Big Feelings about popular things #they’re popular for a reason - it makes sense to have a big reaction #but yeah - i should really know by now but i’m STILL floored every time i read or watch a classic and it Gets Me #like. this story has been Getting people for decades or centuries or MILLENNIA and yet STILL i’m surprised #‘i didn’t think the story would Get me’ says man about story that’s Gotten everyone who’s ever heard it

[peanutseagle]

The part 2 of damian asking anya 's hand was so cute, thanks for taking my request

If u accept requests could u plz draw Loid secretly spying on Anya on her date with Damian seeing if he is a good bf or not

#i swear i wasnt planning on making this emotional #djdhdhd #loidy still sees her as his silly lil peanut girl who hates studying and wants a silenced pistol #over a decade has passed since then??? who cares???? #loid forger #anya forger #damian desmond #damianya #spy x family #i've been having a very yucky art block. and im still not quite over it but im tryingggg #please bear with me other 2 requests #my art

[blackbatcass]

the first thing every dick grayson writer has to keep in mind is that he is defined by his kindness. second thing is that he’s an asshole. third thing is that he’s so, so angry. fourth thing is that he loves donna hinckley stacy troy more than life itself.

#dick grayson #batman #batfam #dc #donna troy #wonder twins #some writers lately (PAST DECADE) haven’t kept these things in mind. and it. SHOWS. #like. i do believe that if you write a dick grayson story and it’s a version where #he DOESNT love and trust donna troy more than anyone in the universe. it’s fundamentally out of character. you feel? #sorry reading who is donna troy issue has made me emotional #he loves her!! SO much!!!!! he would do anything for her!!!!!!

[piosplayhouse]

"Oh dear," the unicorn thought. "I must've really mucked up the story beyond compare! The Red Bull Luo Binghe is protecting the last unicorn scum?! Unconscionable! He should have driven me off the cliff by now!!"

#dont ask why binghe gets to be a human but sqq has to be a unicorn #maybe hes prince lir in this au actually wait omg that would be good #half human half red bull sxy was freakay #the unicorn turning human to disguise herself is obviously sqqs plant body allegory #binghe sniffing around the castle: where is shizun i can still smell him? suspiciously sqq shaped human: gulp #binghe's tragic backstory in this au i guess is that he meets shen qingqiunicorn as a kid and sqq can sense that hes half fae and so #takes him semi under his wing but is like a prick about it until binghes seal breaks and they find out that hes a red bull fae #and shen jiu stabs him into the ocean something something abyss he comes back gets adopted by haggard kills every unicorn by throwing them #into the ocean as well before picking off shen jiunicorn last. and then sy fucks it all up #it's been like a decade since i read the book sorry #svsss #scumbag self saving system #scum villain's self saving system #bingqiu #shen qingqiu #sqq #lbh #luo binghe #my art #svsss last unicorn au

[the-kipsabian]

saw a take so fucking rancid on twitter i almost deleted the entire app from my phone jesus fucking christ

first of all ao3 is an archive site. this is like going to the library and saying "oh i dont like this" on every piece of media you find that you dislike and thinking they should be stamped with some sort of a marker just cause you didnt like it

you can always click back and leave. fic writers owe you nothing to explain themselves and their creations. if they have mistagged or miscategorized fics, then i understand, however there are report tools for that instead of yelling at the artist tbh

im not saying free works arent necessarily above criticism. but this is just. fucking wild. its common courtesy to just enjoy stuff (or fucking leave if you dont, the back button is free) and if the artist specifically asks for critiques, then give one - constructive that is, shitting all over someones work is not proper criticism, mind you

i just find it fucking wild people are treating art and archive sites as social media these days like this and everything needs to be policed and ~catered to the algorithm~ like. no. ao3 doesnt have an algorithm. you should be able to fucking tell what you like and what you dont like and steer away from that kind of content and let people fucking be with their art. they dont owe you anything (except trigger warnings i'd argue, but i know some people disagree with that as well for some reason), and imagine how much more energy you'd have if you only engaged with things you liked and spent time looking at instead of going to places where you dont enjoy yourself. let alone spending time telling other people you dont enjoy what they enjoy. what a fucking life

#like what the fuck #where is the common courtesy of fandoms these days im just fucking asking. its ridiculous #the back button is free. shutting your fucking mouth is free. constructive criticism when people ask for it is nice but only then #these are fucking basic level fandom engagement things #am i old or are people just this fucking awful now that these guidelines dont exist anymore #im just. ough #sorry i had to get this out. idk as someone who has never left unsolicited advice for anyone and never gotten it back it just #it fucking grinds me that people are like this now. like fucking wow #ive been here for almost two decades soon and i still know how to behave. yall better fucking learn #im gonna go back to video game sorry i really needed to yell for a hot fucking second #if you choose to reblog this dont fucking clown on it okay. god #night is an absolute mess on main

[vinelark]

i don’t remember if i ever shared this here, but a while ago i posted a little twitter thread about bats and gas station snacks and some very talented podficcers made a podfic of it! 🎧

[podfic] Jersey Vigilantes Don't Pump Gas by isweedan & reena_jenkins

original thread (text under the cut):

nested tweet reading: ever since i learned gotham is supposed to be in new jersey i can’t get this concept out of my head: [a badly drawn bumper sticker that says “jersey vigilantes don’t pump gas”] / quote tweet reading: the batmobile can’t just slip in and out of a gas station unnoticed. an employee HAS to go fill up the tank. meanwhile the tired night shift cashier knows the various robin eras because they come in to buy different snacks as time goes on.

one night while the manager is out filling *the literal batmobile* the cashier blinks and comes face to face with a child in a leotard and green boots, buying a pack of twizzlers. “thanks!” the first robin calls, somehow vaulting over two rows of shelves on his way out the door.

years later, after a stretch of quiet weeks, a new, curly-haired robin comes in and grabs a bag of flamin hot pepper puffs. the cashier doesn’t even think robin 2 actually likes them, but he looks really satisfied with himself every time he drops them on the counter.

(even after the second robin abruptly stops coming in, the cashier keeps slipping flamin hot pepper puffs onto their order list. no one else ever buys them, but it just—feels like the thing to do, somehow.)

a stretch of months without a robin, oddly tense. then the third robin appears, even smaller than the first two. he slips inside and buys a cup of black coffee and drains it in one go right at the coffee station, nervously eyeing the door like he’s afraid he’ll be caught.

the fourth robin, when she shows up, makes a beeline for the protein bars. finally, the cashier thinks, someone remotely sensible for this line of work. (though maybe not sensible enough—or maybe TOO sensible—because small caffeine robin is back a few months later.)

the fifth robin, when he first appears, approaches the counter. “you will direct me to the best snacks new jersey has to offer,” he tells the cashier.

“uh,” the cashier says. “i like sour patch kids, myself.”

robin 5 nods. “i will take a bag of sour patch children.”

(one night, not much later, red hood strolls through the door. the cashier has lived in gotham for over a decade now; they barely blink, even when nightwing bounds in after him.

“oh, shit, flamin hot pepper puffs,” red hood says. “i haven’t had these in ages.”

“aw, come on,” nightwing says, already holding a pack of twizzlers. “no one else can stand those.”

“why do you think i got them in the first place, dickhead?” red hood says. “to fend off new jersey’s number one snack thief.” and he buys buys every bag in stock.)

#feat. my own terrible art drawn in the notes app of a decade-old ipad #the joke being that you can’t pump your own gas in new jersey #which i’m sure has been joked about plenty before #anyway the podfic is a delight and every once in a while i remember about it and re-listen for a giggle #batfam #my fic #OBVIOUSLY BRUCE HAS HIS OWN GAS PUMP IN THE CAVE #or the batmobile runs on solar (because it’s sustainable and discreet NOT because superman thinks that’s cool) #but: imagine.

[mayasaura]

Marcille and Falin's relationship is so. Like to start out this ten year old child and this thirty-seven year old research grad were one another's first ever friend, right? They're adorable, there's mutual respect, they change and enrich eachother's lives, Marcille revises her whole approach to her life goals due to Falin's influence, ect.

Fast forward a decade, and Falin grows up. Falin leaves, for four whole years, and Marcille follows her to the end of the earth as soon as she's asked. She'll risk her life, die repeatedly, eat monsters and slime, invoke ancient and forbidden magic to save her.

But acknowledging Falin as an adult who has grown and changed with the passage of time? That's scary. That's too scary.

#akshdhd marcille is stuggling so hard with falin being physically a little older than her now #from that moment in the bath to existential dread that she only has a few more decades with Falin in her life #dungeon meshi #dunmeshi spoilers #possibly #I read the whole manga in one night and don't remember when we learn what #falin touden #marcille donato