I just told mom about some bits of Danny Phantom lore and it basically went like this:
Me: So, this kid goes into his mad scientists parents' portal, activates it, sorta dies and instantly resurrects as a half ghost.
Mom, terrified: Poor mother.
Me: Nah, his parents didn't actually notice, they're kinda negligent, too invested into their work.
Mom, more terrified: Poor children.
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there is such a trauma to daughterhood. it comes from the lack of agency - not only from being born as a woman but existing in the world as a child. an oppression on top of an oppression. people make jokes about girls with daddy issues but nothing compares to the kind of trauma you recieve from having a complicated relationship with your mother. people talk about it so often. and it's one thing to have a mother who hates you which is always awful, but often it feels worse to have a mother who doesn't. to have a mother who is simply exhausted by the fact you were born. a mother who doesn't hate you, but loves her men more. a mother who maybe wanted to be a mom, once, and then came to realize what a thankless job it was. and she didn't want to hate you, but it was hard to love you and even harder to like you. a mother who doesn't hate you exactly, but never outgrows her desire to be attractive and beautiful and makes you her enemy in that way. or a mother who has nothing more to her than being a mother and clings to coddling you in a way thats suffocating. so many daughters develop deep empathy for the mothers because they were women, daughters, girls once. everyone deals with it differently. but at the end of it, you still need a mother and that is the most horrible and wretched part of all. the trauma of being alive, of being a woman, and of having a mother but still needing one. such a uniquely miserable feeling
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sylvia plath, todd anderson and virginia woolf (aka ACTUAL tortured poets) watching taylor “im breaking up with my boyfriend for his intense depression and blaming it on him, im dating a racist who enjoys watching woc being brutalized and harasses young woc artists, i sent my fans out on a hate train to attack a young woc actress for a line she had to say as part of her job to show how mentally ill her character was, im dating a maga supporter, i refuse to say anything about a current genocide despite being the most influential person in the world right now, i am a billionaire, i fly 13 minute flights and have the highest carbon emission of any celebrity, i am a known white feminist who only speaks about issues when it affects me and has constantly let my fans get away with extreme racism and even encouraged it by associating myself with known racists” swift call herself a tortured poet (her writing sounds like a bunch of thesaurus words slapped over gabba hanna and rupi kaur-esque poetry that was created purely as a trinket for an edgy pinterest board)
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i know the hunger games isnt about romance i know it isnt a love story but. theres just something so beautiful in the way peeta is the personification of what it means to heal and he /is/ the dandelion and the bread and the hope that things can be better even if they wont be fixed. even if the nightmares dont stop he will still hold her. wake her up and tell her shes alive. shes safe. and when its over and done and theres no more saving or protecting or trying their absolute hardest to die if it means keeping the other alive, the horrors dont stop. but katniss will still find that comfort in peetas arms.
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god the scene in season one where jonathan comes home to joyce and lonnie on the couch drinking together is harrowing. it makes me want to cry just thinking about it, your brother is dead, your mom is horrible mental state and is now also introducing your abusive father back into your house. what a fucking nightmare.
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Rhysand to Ember: “Are you calling me a monster, Ember Quinlan?”
Me Reading About It:
I have to appreciate his small instances of self-reflection. It goes nowhere of course, but it’s still a miracle to see.
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