#and i can't even imagine the fear people must experience. so so so fucked up.

[foolondahill17]

I have a lot of thoughts and feelings, @urne-buriall, and they're all your fault. Today's segment let off at the same point where my initial read-through stopped before I had to wait for chapter updates. I'm struck with the same feeling of heartache for Dean and frustration for the way both Kate and Sam reacted to his situation.

1. I'm trying to respond to Kate sympathetically. John is a man she's known for some time and the father of her child. She wants to think the best of him. In the 90s there wasn't as much public information about people in domestic abuse situations, especially not a young man like Dean (and this is still true for a lot of male victims). But I can't help but view Kate through the lens of someone in this day and age.

If someone tells you they are being abused (let alone an eighteen-year-old kid) you never - never - go to the alleged abuser to ask if it's true. The amount of danger she put Dean in after he just disclosed this secret to her, especially when he'd been trying to keep her son safe? I'm stunned she could make that kind of decision.

Although my frustration toward Kate is understandable, I think my anger is misplaced - that should only be directed toward John. John is the danger here, not Kate. In fact, Kate is another potential victim, perhaps, if Dean had never said anything. She's in a difficult situation, too - an unwed, single mother trying to build a better life for her son. It's understandable she's blinded by John's charisma.

I also can't imagine the guilt Kate must experience after this moment: she has to learn about Dean pressing charges against John, eventually, and - she's a smart lady - she'll now not only have irrefutable proof of John's actions but also guess that John must have blown up at Dean after her phone call. Her horror and shame over that decision will likely haunt her for the rest of her life. It's a sign of Dean's tremendous compassion that he forgives her (if he ever even blames her in the first place; I imagine it would take a couple years for him to even register he was upset about her actions, let alone voice them). I hope they're able to have a conversation about it someday.

2. My frustration toward Sam is a little milder. After all, Sam is a child. He can't be expected to react with the same level of knowledge and maturity. But I'm still yelling at him through the screen when he confronts John about leaving. Again, I can't help but think of the danger that creates for Dean. What if Sam had directly confronted John about hurting Dean? How would John have reacted? What if John had lashed out at Sam, and Dean had gotten in the middle?

Again, if someone comes to you with the fact they're being abused (and Dean didn't even tell Sam, in this case; Sam discovered it, himself) do. not. confront. the. abuser. But Sam is young and understandably selfish, impulsive, and self-riteous in the way teenagers are. What's more, Sam is also a victim of abuse, just not physically like Dean (which I tried to portray in my prequel). Sam's also had a neglectful and volatile father. He's seen how John treats Dean, and this has left scars and fears aplenty for Sam. He's also experiencing a trauma response, here, except his is to lash out rather than make himself smaller.

I can't help but see how both these events leave Dean. Of the only two people who know the secret of John's abuse, one immediately betrays that trust to his abuser, and one immediately leaves him to face the abuse by himself. It's a mark of Dean's tremendous strength that he ever tells anyone again about what John's done to him - a further testimony to his courage that he presses charges.

Yes, some of that choice to tell his story is taken out of his hands when John hurts him badly enough that the evidence is impossible to hide, but it's still Dean who ultimately decides to come forward. And it's a marvel that he finds that determination when he's been let down so badly by others before. I'm so fucking proud of him for his decisions in the next few segments: choosing to trust Missouri, Cas, Bobby, Ellen, and eventually Jody. I can imagine Dean faltering through his statement to Jody, "I know it's hard to believe -" and I like to think Jody, with calm and compassion, would immediately tell him, "I believe you."

I posted about it before, and, although I want nothing more than Cas to be there immediately to support Dean in this moment, I'm glad that his absence narratively gives Dean the space to grow as a character. In a way, Dean needed to reach this moment of despair (for the story; I'm not extending this to real-life abuse victims) in order to discover that he still has the capacity to trust the people around him. He needed to realize that he's not alone in this. All he needs to do is ask for help; he will be given it in spades.

#spirit of the west #spirit of the west daily #abuse mention

[godsfavoritescientist]

Y'know, if Ford was getting his back blown out in the mindscape all the time for years, then there must have been a point where he felt so comfortable and loved and safe around Bill that he ended up hugging Bill tightly afterwards and sobbing for an inordinate amount of time while he spilled his guts to Bill about how much this relationship means to him. I don't have the energy to write a whole fic about this right now, but imagine him sobbing to Bill about how he's never felt this seen before, about how he's never felt like someone intimately knows and loves everything about him before, and thanking Bill for being the first person to ever make him feel this way and the first person to ever make him feel safe enough to fully be himself around him. Imagine Bill just kinda standing there awkwardly while being hugged at first, feeling wayyyy out of his depth and very ready for this moment to be over, but the longer Ford goes into detail about how impossible it's been for him to fully open up to anyone before, and how grateful he is that Bill has shown him what it's like to be fully loved and understood for the first time, the more feelings rise up inside Bill that he's been in denial about for a long time.

Things like Genuinely Caring About This Human, things like Being Touched By How Much The Human Loves Him. Even things like... jealousy? Bill tells himself that can't possibly be right. But there is still something unsettling about hearing Ford go on and on about how great it is to be completely open with someone and get to completely be himself with no fear of being rejected. There is still a voice in the back of Bill's mind that wants to respond with 'wow, must be nice! I bet that's a wonderful experience! Sure must be fucking nice to be able to do that, huh!'. Ford thinks he is getting to experience it for the first time, but Bill is too far down the road of lying until it doesn't sound like lying anymore for him to ever feel what Ford is describing so intimately to him. He knows it so acutely that it hurts. The way Ford talks about it makes Bill almost want to be able to be completely honest with Ford. It makes him almost want to give up his plans in exchange for the joys of being fully known by someone who loves him so much.

But he can't. So, after Ford talks about his experiences with not being able to be himself around other people, Bill shares only a tiny sliver of the truth about himself. In response to Ford's so sweetly asked question about if Bill thinks they'll spend an eternity together, Bill answers: "No. You are mortal, for one thing, and there is very little that can be done about that. What we have is not going to last very long, and I hope I can come to terms with that when the time comes that I lose you. Unless you come out of left field and do something that surprises me. We'll see."

Ford gives him a sympathetic look, buying into the misleading way Bill phrased it to sound like an immortality problem, rather than one of a clash of moralities. Ford tells Bill that he'll do his damnedest to surprise Bill. Ford tells Bill with a smile that he's full of surprises.

Bill smiles back at Ford. It's a sweet thought, but he doesn't believe it. Instead, he has to grapple with a newly-acknowledged ache in his chest. An ache that makes him almost dread the inevitable moment that Ford discovers Bill's real plans for the portal.

#godsficideas #long post #bill angst #prebetrayal #idk!!!! the idea of bill opening up to ford is so interesting #I dont even know how he could do that but I can imagine a scenario where he comes very close to it at least! #godsdrabbles #gods drabbles

[w1cked-w1tch]

I'm glad people are liking my captains vs espada post! I put a lot of thought into it and it's not even everything I wanted to write lol let's let my autism dissect Mayuri some more, shall we?

Ashisogi Jizo being a baby I think has more to do with Mayuri's obsession with creating life. I have yet to decide if I think it being a Jizo has any real significance or not. Theres a ton of Buddhist symbols where zanpakuto are concerned and thus far its been hard to parse out what's there because it's relevant to the character and what's there because Kubo thought it was neat. I fully plan on looking more into it at some point though, maybe there will be another essay about that in the future.

Ashisogi Jizo, and more specifically Konjiki Ashisogi Jizo, plays HEAVILY into the aposematism aspect of his character design. Mayuri very much wants to broadcast "don't fuck with me, I'm poisonous and I'll fuck you up" which is..... interesting. Why poisonous instead of venomous, and how do we know? Aposematism occurs in both kinds of animals right? Well, think about it. Konjiki Ashisogi Jizo is a giant caterpillar thing, right? There ARE venomous caterpillars, but they're spiky or hairy. Ashisogi Jizo is not. Mayuri does make HIMSELF look this way, but why hasn't he made Ashisogi Jizo spiky or hairy? We know that he can. Both the sealed form AND his shikai have been made to look somewhat spiky. We know he can alter the appearance of a zanpakuto spirit. So why doesn't he do it?

If you don't want to dig too deep into it, you could just say "he just wants to be the poison/venom bug man cuz he's a weirdo" which..... true..... BUT! There are a couple things that don't quite fit here. Mayuri Kurotsuchi is underweight. He's 5'8 and 119 lbs (174 cm and 54kg). Dudes real thin. Look at how big he makes himself look with this clothing.

Now, this could feed into the aposematic shtick. Lots of animals who use aposematism use displays that make themselves look bigger than they are. Except...... they only do it when they think they're being actively threatened. Who in their right mind would make themselves a threat to Mayuri Fucking Kurotsuchi inside the seireitei? Nobody is threatening his position or his safety. No this is a perceived threat to his more intimate, squishy parts. His emotions.

His attitude feeds into this. Yeah, crazy mad scientist guy, thinks he's the best in the whole wide world. That trope doesn't require the shitty ass attitude though. During the battle with Szayelaporro, when he's looking at Nemu after Szayelaporro uses Gabriel and emerges from her its drawn out. He stares at her for a while, it felt like an eternity the first time I watched it. And he looks...... upset. Sad. It's barely perceptible, you could easily miss it and I thought I was imagining things until we see him staring again later in the fight with a completely blank expression.

Mayuri is softer than he lets on. Softer than he wants ANYONE to see, and he uses his appearance and his venomous attitude to keep people at bay. To keep people from seeing his soft white underbelly. His vulnerability. I'm certain he has a lot of fun with his appearance, it's a cool concept and I can't imagine how much fun it must be playing around with it. But there's a reason nobody but Nemu ever sees him without it. I have a similar experience with makeup and shitty attitude. My appearance in public is a physical representation of the wall I've built. My makeup is a physical mask. My facial expressions are a deterant. My shitty attitude usually takes care of anyone brave enough to still approach me. I love makeup, I love fashion, and I have a lot of fun putting together the version of me other people see.

So, from my perspective, Mayuri's appearance is absolutely a representation of his weirdness and his scientific mind but it's also a representation of his fear. This is why I think Mayuri is poisonous, rather than venomous. All of the offensive posturing is a bluff meant to scare you away. The venom he wants you to believe he has doesn't exist. Poison certainly has built up in his system, like a monarch caterpillar, so if you "eat" him you will feel the effects, but he's nowhere near as dangerous as he'd like you to believe. I think some subconscious part of his brain wants somebody to figure it out and thats why he hasnt modified Konjiki Ashisogi Jizo to look venomous.

Maybe I'm just projecting though who knows🤷‍♀️ what I DO know is that I'd let him do all kinds of weird, nasty things to me. For science of course.

#mayuri kurotsuchi

[physicsfox7]

I actually think I want to talk to people. When I'm having problems, when my brain is being a dick. I actually do want to talk about it, but it feels like everyone around me is handling it, they're taking their bad situation and making it work, so why am I failing?

Part of it stems from my parents never really expressing interest in me. They did, but when it came to my mental state, it was more: "You have to go to school, you have to go to work, you have to do this. You can't just avoid everything, it will still be there tomorrow." I was encouraged to address my issues head on, because they would always be there looming.

So why bother talking about it? You've got your own shit to deal with, telling you about my problems is just going to add to it. Which leads to part two.

In my best moments, my happiest moments, my most positive; I still feel like a burden. I whine too much, I need to get over it and pull myself up by my own bootstraps. No one has time to baby sit me, I am my own responsibility. So when I am feeling low, beaten. When I am feeling how broken my soul is, how in the world could I face anyone? How can I lean on someone and add to their misery?

Not that I haven't. It warmed my heart when I was having a bad day and someone reached out, she let me lean on her. And I actually did, and it helped. But I can't do that every day because then people will leave. And I need to lean almost every day noe.

Sadly, I speak from experience. It's happened before. People letting me join in out of obligation, not because they wanted me there. People, who claim to be friends, who said to my face that I whine too much, that I'm too needy, too much of a burden.

And part three: I'm new at this. I thought for years I was so in touch with my feelings, because I would feel it in the moment and then it would pass. But the only thing that I ever let myself feel was anger. Imagine my surprise when I realized I don't cry, I don't feel sad, I don't let myself have bad days. I ignore it, push it down. So feeling shitty enough to make me want to do nothing more than crawl back into bed is new. Hating myself so much because of the way I react to a situation.

I know anger, I know embarrassment and fear. What I dont know is depression, sadness, that deep feeling of hopelessness that comes with it. I find myself asking if I know happiness, peace, joy. Or is what I associate with those words is a pale imitation of itself?

My inexperience in feeling these things is embarrassing. I'm going through things most people deal with in high school. So I'm hesitant to go to the people who care about me and say: "I'm feeling x, because of y." Because it feels so fucking high school to say it to myself, how will it look to other people?

I want to talk about it, but its so hard for me to get past the feeling of being burdensome and opening myself up to being that vulnerable. And Jesus what if I word vomit and say something I am trying not to talk about? Because everyone has something they can't say. So if I can't say one thing, why not not say another thing? Why not hold all of it back? It feels like I'm betraying someone's trust when I don't tell them the whole truth.

It's impossible to reconcile this garbled mix of mess, so unfortunately this is very much a ramble. And it must be even more confusing and convoluted from an outsiders perspective. But this is what you do on Tumblr, ramble. And maybe someone somewhere will be able to put into 5 words what takes me 500. Or they'll understand, and be able to communicate something. Or nothing will come of this because this is just so fucking much to put on anyone. And that's okay, because at least I got it down on paper, so to speak.

#mental health #long rambling fox post #i still dont know what to put in the tags #it doesnt help that im always tired #my mom told me yesterday i need to talk to a doctor #because i am depressed and even she can tell #this has been so much

[blackjackkent]

Stopped in camp and chatted with everyone while sorting inventory; a few people wanted to talk about the shapeshifter and everyone else just wanted to talk about Halsin and how hot he is. XD

"So Bhaal's Chosen is a doppelganger. I should not be surprised - they have ever been among his favorite servants. Orin is testing you; either she thinks herself a predator, playing with her food... or she fears what you might do. Good."

Hector had a nature check to recall things about doppelgangers but his memory fails him in this particular instance. So instead he just says, "You seem to have experience with doppelgangers."

"Aye - this all begins to ring a little too familiar for my liking. The last time I fought doppelgangers, the Bhaalspawn Sarevok was using them to subvert the city government. Aid his rise to power. But Orin is more predator than politician, I think. She simply wants to make us feel hunted. Isolated. 'Tell the lordling that Orin is watching.' It seems Gortash and Orin have had a little falling out. We should leverage that."

Makes sense - and tracks with how Hector was already interpreting the situation.

And yay earlier game throwback! This is a throwback all the way to BG1 - the doppelgangers in the city and in Candlekeep. A particularly traumatizing experience for Caden but I can't imagine Jaheira looks back on it with any fondness either, even though they won.

-----

"Fucking shapeshifter. She'll try to break our best asset - our trust. Fortunately, she's no match for our second-best asset: me."

Hell yeah. Hector gives her big lovey eyes, obviously. Though secretly I suspect he is worried that his love and trust for her is going to end up used against him at some point in Orin's plans.

-----

"It's not enough we have a gallery of villains to look out for, but now we could be infiltrated by a shapechanger? I can't even tell if any of you are acting strange because you've been replaced or because THIS GROUP IS FULL OF WEIRDOS!!!!!!"

LMAO. Hector gave Astarion this very startled face and I don't blame him; Astarion was REALLY worked up about this. XD He's also not wrong; this group is full of weirdos.

-----

"That foul shapeshifter Orin is like a scavenger beast - probing us for waeknesses. Do not let her shake your resolve."

Hector's resolve has been shaken from the moment he started this mess but he will do his best. <3

-----

"It's about time Halsin actually stepped up and joined us properly. He's certainly been taking up space at camp for long enough."

That seems unnecessarily rude, Shadowheart. :P

-----

"A savvy move, recruiting Halsin to our cause. While I'm adept at most forms of Weave manipulation, druidic magic is not my area of expertise. He will make for a most useful option to have in reserve."

This is somewhat funny because we also have Jaheira, and must be REALLY funny if you are playing a druid yourself. We have no shortage of druidic options.

-----

"Ah - Halsin is such a delight. Woe to the cultist who tangles with that thick hunk of an elf."

XD Please go shoot your shot, Wyll. Hector is breaking both your hearts at this point so maybe you can bond over that.

-----

"Halsin's proved himself a fine ally already. He'll be useful in battle, if those tree-trunk arms are an indication."

[snickers] Very nice arms indeed, Lae'zel, I agree. Unfortunately I think he's another one who will probably try to talk philosophy with you if you try to blow off steam with him.

#bjk plays baldur's gate 3 #hector carlisle #this camp is getting crowded #also i really wish helmets would stay toggled off when i take someone out of the party >.<

[onstoryladders]

so thought about getting into byler or rather stranger things latley but i remember your post about byler having strong gramblack vibes and i am still haunted by the disaster that was gramblack (my beloved). and honestly i dont know if i could turn off the shipping goggles when i know they are shipped by others when i start the show. so from a scale of like toddblack to gramblack what kinda mess is byler?

Oh, this is a nice one. I don't know how but anons on this blog ALWAYS manage to read my mind and ask exactly what I want to be asked 😂 I've wanted to talk about Byler and Gramblack for eons, you have no idea gdubdgsy so here we go!

Alright, I'm gonna preface this by saying that Gramblack is truly the ONLY thing in my past experiences that still manages to give me some doubts about Byler. If it wasn't for that, then I wouldn't have anything to fear, because every single detail in Stranger Things points to Byler, and even though many people joke about Byler ending up like Johnlock or Klance or whatever other Ship That Never Was™, those have absolutely nothing in common with Will and Mike, starting with the fact that Byler is already half canon, since Will is canonically in love with Mike.

Gramblack was just-- terrible writing, but it was also malicious (because the writers wanted to skew our perception of Gram and Black's relationship so they could “surprise” us with that shitty twist) and concerned characters that weren't as important to the story as the main ones (I don't care what anyone says, the writers cared about SeanWhite the most lol which is such a shame because between the three pairings they were the least interesting to me, but I digress).

In Byler's case, we have an established love triangle between three characters that are very central to the narrative. The Duffers said Will is gonna have an important role in season 5, and we're gonna see the resolution of his coming of age arc – which is not just about him being gay in general, but also about his feelings for Mike.

Now, I can't see the future, so I don't know what will happen in season 5. Maybe the Duffers will catch a bad case of Selective Bad Writing™ and start fucking up the Byler storyline out of nowhere, what do I know. What I do know is that everything points to Byler endgame, and many arcs and characters are gonna suffer if they decide to take a step back from a path that THEY chose – because there was absolutely no need to show how IN LOVE Will is with Mike if that storyline has to end up in rejection.

And since the other couples in the show are well written, I don't see why the writers should suddenly decide to make Mileven endgame when... well, I mean, there must be a reason if no one can stand them, even in the GA 🙄

What I'm trying to say is that what makes Byler similar to Gramblack is that both pairings are what the story NEEDS in order to work. In both cases, if you mess up the couple, you mess up everything else too, because the relationship is so strongly intertwined with the narrative that it's a crime not to see that.

In Gramblack's case, that's what happened, but as I said: it was malicious, and all the hints about Gram being in love with Black were put there for a reason. We weren't imagining things. We weren't delusional. The Not Me writers consciously decided to EXPLOIT our expectations to gain an emotional reaction from a twist that didn't work.

I don't think the Stranger Things writers are gonna do the same thing. The backlash would be a nightmare, and they seem to care about their characters enough not to fuck up on purpose.

Why build up a romantic connection for four season and make it end up in rejection? If Will was a girl or El was a boy we wouldn't be here rn 😭

#byler #gramblack #anyway anon i understand you #i have yet to watch vol 2

[preciousrootlm]

To the person I love.

Those last days showed me the hard reality of things. Being without you, not being able to talk to you and having to push through and take care of myself anyway. Sleep doesn't happen anymore as I imagine is the same for you. I made so many mistakes and hurt you in so many different ways and I didn't want to see it and there's no excuse for that. I ended up selfish and uncaring, and a bit too much too sometimes, wanting attention too much, distracting too much which needs to be worked on and there's nothing more shocking than having to live with strangers for a few days and seeing the reality of my behaviour. I miss you all the time and wish I could talk to you but know it would only hurt you more right now as I can't promise anything you would believe and I understand it. I don't think we're incompatible because of all the things we shared and all the ways we understand each other, I think I let my pain and my past take over me and made it all about me when you were there too, having your own emotions, your own hurts, your own happy moments that you probably felt couldn't be shared because of my lack of attention/caring which makes me self centered in the end. I am not the person I wish to be, I don't like this version of myself right now. What am I going to do about it ? Seek help to strangers, doctors, therapists. Talking to people I don't know to have other point of view until I finally am the way I want to be. It won't take a few days as I struggle to get back up and it has only been a few days and it will take a lot of efforts. I think of all the ways you must be struggling, seeing everything that reminds you of us, all the plans that can't be done and all the hopes that I destroyed. I will always love you but right now I'm not good for you. I only wish to be able to be in your life once I am the person I am currently working on to be. I lacked communication, honesty about feelings, honesty about what I would wish to experience or try in life. I hid behind my fears instead of seeking adventures, I left my abusive environment but haven't managed to shake off my protective shell completely to not be afraid and act when it is needed. I wish I would never have had to say goodbye to you, not knowing when I'll hear from you again. I think of texting you when I wake up cold in the middle of the night but also in any moment we used to be together for, the hardest part is knowing I can't because I don't want to hurt you anymore. I regret all the bad decisions I have made, I will never regret all the good moments we had together and you will always be in my heart no matter the journey I'm on. You are my first love and no one will be able to take this place into my heart, even if you can't see me again it won't change that fact. I did so many shit that we both are aware of and I am going to do my best to fix those mistakes. I will always love you and I don't know if you'll ever see this post at this point. I love you so much and I also fucked up so much that right now I don't deserve you, you are one of the kindest, loving and most caring person I've ever had the pleasure to meet and have in my life.

I love you, no takes back, Kit

#i fucked it all up #me talking #heartbreak

[jaythelay]

Fuck words, or "cuss words" are basically some fragile loser saying "you can't speak to me unless you speak to me the way I desire"

and to that I say, your limited experiences will lead you to ignorance and thus fear. People speak a variety of ways, accents, verbiage, and more. Stuff comes naturally when talking because it's how people operate, grew up, adapted and changed, nature vs nurture n such, to demand them to change is to deny their freedom to be themselves as their default relaxed self. Solely, to serve your selfish self-interests, self-image and ego.

At some point you should recognize that your own way of speaking isn't particular to another's, but to then expect them to demand you speak to them a certain way, is genuinely so intellectually lacking it becomes impossible to understand where to begin with your stupid fucking ass.

Actually, I do, you don't expect anyone to demand you change the way you talk to them, you expect to demand "others" to talk a certain way towards you. You expect the Entire Human Race to change how they operate, how they talk, for you. Your cringe ass.

And you're simply not important enough in their life to expect let alone ever selfishly demand they change for you. I'm sorry but you're just an overwhelmingly fragile narcissist who looks down on other's for not being you or reaching a standard very few find reason to bother with. It's a low bar, and it's a bar no one respectable bothers with because it's beneath them.

If I were to continue my elaboration, it would be to say that denying parts of language not because of it's inherent value but because of how you chose to perceive it, is a bias, one that serves nothing but to feed your fear to continue your ignorance.

I don't demand you to say fuck, I ask of you to adapt and improve yourself to an environment that isn't so sheltered and incapable of growth, one that doesn't inherently say you're better than others despite your utter lack of human experience. At some point you must recognize you're pushing away much of the human element for a petty squabble on a human invention.

I respect the dude who refuses to use G in any of his words. Because in that, I see someone who doesn't want censorship, but simply believes it to be a critically bad letter. Not because they think it should be censored, but simply because their own reasoning led them to dislike the letter, it's usage, and it's look. They'd prefer it gone yes, but they don't expect me to stop using it, or censor it on TV. They don't hate it because people use it, they don't hate it because they think people are dumb for using it. They just hate it for itself, not for a dumb squabble of a bias.

This entire post is to go all the way back to hearing the GOD DAMN TV BEEPING IN THE OTHER FUCKING ROOM. I DON'T KNOW WHAT THEY'RE SAYING, BUT THE ONLY SOUND THAT REACHES ME IS THAT GOD FUCKING DAMNED BEEP. WHO'S IT FOR? NO REALLY. WHO'S IT FOR?

The idea of it protecting children is long gone in the internet era where we hear what Florida and Texas are doing, where republicans are discussing bringing god damn Child Slavery and Rape back, when schools are warzones with active training in what to do when shot, why the fuck, do we Beep/censor, Anything, on TV. Fuck's sake. The only idiots that pushed for it are the most sheltered egotistical losers on the planet who can't handle the MOST BASIC ASPECT OF HUMAN EXPRESSION.

Imagine if walking a certain way was so offensive we censored it on TV. That's exactly where we're at, there's no excuse, no reason, we just do it because losers are fragile. Can't even make a trauma based argument, it's Words. Cmon.

#Fuck words #cuss words #censorship #curse words #feel gross writing that #like writing propaganda meant for no one

[vermillioncrown]

the idea of completing the body swap circle by giving z!mxy wwx’s body is so funny. imagine everyone that knew wwx pre-death having mental whiplash and having to recalibrate because that shady expression/dead fish stare does not belong there??? where is the trademarked cheeky smile??? (jwy is really gonna go through it…maybe lqr too because he CANNOT with the associated memories)

Bonus: they don’t tell anyone that it’s zyx in wwx body so everyone assumes that everyone is in their proper bodies. wwx tries to convince zyx to pretend to be him just to mess with people

yes

yesss

exactly what i'm going for there

first off, gotta stop everyone from coming after z!mxy's life (again) (he didn't ask for this, he was sleeping and ready to fade away and now wwx and lwj stuck him here and ... ooo . he's taller. this is nice. weather's great)

any body that z!mxy comes back in will be cursed to the extreme, let alone in wwx's original body. lqr was about to bring the entirety of gusu lan's exorcism prowess upon z!mxy, if not for that uncanny serious expression and genuinely, sincerely thankful bow "elder, thank you for giving this undeserving mo xuanyu shelter. this one will not trouble you any longer" he's not going to stay if unwelcome.

and then seeing the 🥺 face from wwx in mxy's body (lqr: there's two of them i can't think straight) and the 🥺 emotion from his nephew's soul, lqr resolves to just... never look in the direction of wwx's body.

"... get him in here. we're closing the wards for the night." damn it all.

bc z!mxy has more emotional competency than a toddler (sometimes he disproves himself okay but generally higher eq than the other two), he does not put himself in the way of jiang-zongzhu if he doesn't have to. bc if he ever shows himself, it's either letting jc think that z!mxy is a bodysnatcher (which will piss jc off) or letting him know that wwx defied the natural order... again. for someone else (which will also piss him off)

he's not getting within a li of jc until wwx talks to him. and then lwj also talks to him. and then z!mxy might feel comfortable walking in yunmeng territory.

bonus:

it will work. wwx can't play z!mxy convincingly, but z!mxy can play wwx.

comes w the hobbies/experiences from previous life (theater. dance. playing pranks. cosplaying. being professional. to name a few) and then a second life pretending to be someone else.

... i don't think there are many people left that know both wwx and z!mxy to trick. perhaps the first night, both of them can't stay conscious and lwj fears the ritual didn't stick. it's highly plausible they switched back to their original bodies, yeah?

lwj isn't completely fooled, but there's a slight sense of unease when z!mxy in wwx's body latches onto him. he's saying the right words, earnestly leaning into him, eyes so full of feeling and depth of connection, it must be wei ying -

and then wwx in mxy's body tries acting polite and the whole game is up.

the best part of the prank is when z!mxy in wwx's body drops the ruse. the immediate transition from (￣y▽￣)╭ -> (ㆆ_ㆆ) is like watching a serial killer.

oh, they can try to trick lxc (w z!mxy's cooperation, the main story won't devastate lxc to such an extreme). that's probably the only person they can trick to some degree. if and only if lwj isn't present for lxc to read.

oh, jin ling would be fun to trick. it's not about knowing how wwx was like in his first life - but if wwx can play z!mxy well enough. ("i have so many fucked up uncles...")

z!mxy trying to go through his day, letting wwx mimic him (z!mxy thinks it's a waste of effort)

"there's nothing distinct to rely on - i'm too boring for that," z!mxy explains

"subtle." wwx trying to pour tea for the nth time, almost with the same posture "the pattern is subtle."

"you can't even do the expression right."

"isn't it just being relaxed?"

"senior i am far from relaxed at any given moment."

#inquiry #Anonymous #zyx au's #mdzyx #z!mo xuanyu #if not the wwx complete body swap #i pictured them growing z!mxy a body that has to keep developing #as in they get to have a chibi z!mxy for a few days for fun and profit #lqr's like 'i can't kick him out - he's a child giving me those child eyes' #a few days later 'i should have kicked him out before he turned into an evil looking adult!'

[maxirueee]

AU Alberu's POV as the experimented Beru

Alberu: Cale?

Cale: ...nggh..yes?

Cale rubs his eyes as he tried to open them slowly only to see his lover looking right at him with a nervous expression.

Alberu: I suddenly had a bad dream.

Cale: It's literally 3am in the morning.

Alberu: mm..yea- well *fidgeting*

Cale: Spit it out. What was your bad dream about Beru?

Alberu: DON'T CALL ME THAT ANYMORE- PLEASE just please I'm begging you...

Cale was in deep shock that his lover raised his voice at him just because of what? He called him by his nickname?

Cale: Didn't you tell me multiple times that I should stop calling you 'hyung' when we finally got together?

Alberu: I-its not that.. I just-

Cale: Tell me what's wrong Beru.

Alberu: THAT'S the PROBLEM.

Cale: Which is??

Alberu: That nickname, in my dream I was suddenly trapped in a flat boxed screen, I couldn't move but all I could do was smile. Smiling while looking towards the horizon which seemed endless. White. Blank.

ALberu: After a few minutes I suddenly heard voices. At first, there were a lot of compliments about how radiant I loo-

Cale: Are you even sure that's a bad dream?

Alberu: Yeah it is a bad dream!

Cale: Aren't you just totally flaunting how good-looking you are? You're srsly waking me up in the middle of the night because of this? I'm going back to slee-

Alberu: I SWEAR THAT'S NOT IT!

Cale looks back at Alberu who had a look of desperation. Cale couldn't distinguish if what he's seen rolling down the face of his beloved was sweat or tears. Maybe both. Well, he might as well comfort his lover since that was his job. Alberu: I heard giggles, squeals, people were shrieking with how I finally appeared. They kept saying that I looked so dazzling, how I sparkled. They were even speaking the same annoying lines that you tell me every time with your glib tongue.

Cale: Whatever do you mean oh shining sun of the Roan Empi-

Alberu: My point exactly *glaring at Cale*

Cale: Alright go on.

Alberu: It went on for days, I couldn't tell how long I was trapped in that frame-like screen window, all of a sudden I reverted back to my dark elf form.

Cale continues to stare at him, already feeling bored as he watched Alberu continue ranting his struggle of a mere dream. Although he found it amusing as he heard him say the next lines.

Alberu: But it didn't stop there, my hair color suddenly changed to a blood-red color just like yours Cale. I was the spitting image of you. And the voices agreed on how we really are sworn brothers if we just switched hair colors.

Cale: Hoh...

'There must be something more to this if it actually made the emperor of the Roan Kingdom have buckets of sweat rolling down his pretty face.'

Alberu: It was until I heard somebody say, 'How about a Pink Haired Beru?'

Cale: Huh?

Alberu: My hair color immediately changed to pink, then sky blue, then green, then orange, then red again. I didn't know when it'd stop but I couldn't even budge. Even when I wanted to so bad.

Alberu looked dead straight in Cale's eyes, with both his hands firmly holding his partner's shoulders, but ironically he was shaking. Alberu Crossman was shaking in fear. For what reason? Is this another one of the Sun God's pranks to his lover? Perhaps it was the God of Death again? He continues to ponder at the annoying thought that maybe divine beings were messing around his precious people again but stopped as Alberu continued speaking his worries.

Alberu: I thought it was okay since it was just a hair color change..then a woman's voice asked with great anticipation, "HOW ABOUT A BALD AND A MOHAWKBERU?"

Alberu: I continued to smile, even when my luscious golden blonde hair was instantly gone and I was suddenly bald. BALD! I saw numerous hearts floating in front of me and I could hear the mockery and laughter of beings I could not even see. Yet I continued to smile.

Cale was speechless.

Alberu: For some reason, I could read the words floating in front of me. "EVERYBODY GIVE IT UP FOR THE ROAN KINGDOM'S FAVORITE SHINING SUN- BALDBERU" is what it said. More hearts appeared at a scary rate and I couldn't even shout or move. I was terrified.

Alberu glared at the person in front of him like a mad man. Cale just shut up and listened to whatever he said, Alberu really looked mental.

Alberu: The woman from a while ago spoke again, I swear her voice was scary beyond belief. She added "Okay everybody hold up- Now imagine DELINQUENT HAIRCUT AlBERU"

Alberu: My hair suddenly grew back twice as much and it was styled into this weird looking hairdo...

Cale continued to have his stoic face which made Alberu feel relieved. Little does he know Cale was on the verge of laughing his ass off-

ALberu: I suddenly heard "JOSUBERU I CAN'T WITH THIS FANDOM- YA'LL REALLY DID IT U PUNKS" again from that mortifying woman since earlier, apparently it was done by a group of people claiming to be my fans?! BUT THE MONSTROSITY THEY'VE- no that wasn't even half of it

Cale: 'There's actually more?! PFFFFFT' I see, continue then. The prince saw his darling sweetheart Cale shaking as if he was sympathizing with what he was going through. At that very moment, he felt touched by his lover's empathy towards himself.

Alberu: The horrors didn't end just there as I was still waiting for the whole nightmare to be over, they were begging for a 'Voldeberu' which I don't even understand, at that point, I SUDDENLY LOST MY NOSE!!

I WAS BALD AGAIN AND MY NOSE DISAPPEARED YET I WAS STILL SMILING. I HAVE NEVER FELT SO MUCH FEAR IN MY LIFE.

Alberu: Somebody then proposed a 'Clowberu' AND MY FACE SUDDENLY BECAME A CLOWN WEARING MAKEUP. The hardships I had to take while staying still like a fucking mannequin. BUT IT STILL DIDNT STOP THERE.

Cale almost broke into laughter as he wanted to continue listening to his lover's amusing dream! If he laughs now Alberu might as well punch him in the face.

Alberu: I wanted to cry, I pleaded with the Sun God in my head that I want this to stop but I didn't get what I wanted. Instead, a chatbox suddenly appeared, I almost pissed my pants reading at the schemes of those so-called 'fans' had for me.

Cale: Oho.. what did you s-see then? 'Pfft'

Alberu: "LET'S MAKE HIS SKIN GREEN WITH ONLY ONE EYE, MIKE WAZOWSKIEBERU" "We need a butt, BUTTBERU" "I still didn't get my mohawhkberu!" "TWIN TAILESBERU" "AFROBERU!" "MONKBERU!" "SANGWOOBERU" "COWBERU" "UCHIHABERU" "I SAY NUNBERU! NUNBERU SUPREMACY RISE!!!!!!"

I DON'T EVEN WANT TO KNOW WHAT THE FUCK IS THAT MIKE WAZOWSKI BERU! BUT THEY WANT MY HEAD TO BE A COW?! HOW COULD THEY TO THE EMPEROR OF THE RO-

Cale couldn't handle it anymore he bursts out laughing, almost in tears.

Cale: BUHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAH!!! If only I was there to see it all! I ca- I CANT! MIKE WAZOW- WAZOWSKI HAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAH AND AFRO?! HAHAHAHAHAHA

Alberu: How could you be laughing at my pain?!

Cale: Oh dear emperor of mine, isn't it fine that you have such 'entertaining fans' of yours?

Alberu: Entertaining can't even describe those lots... They all praised me for how I was the rising sun of the Roan Kingdom as they humiliated my every being. To the point where they even planned on turning me into 'LIGHTBULBERU'. A FUCKING LIGHTBULB BECAUSE THEY WANT ME TO SHINE LITERALLY. A WALKING FLASHLIGHT KING. ME. ALBERU CROSSMAN.

Cale: PFFT HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

Alberu: Haaaahh... You don't understand because you were never in my position. Those fans were a bunch of lunatics I say, LUNATICS!

What Alberu doesn't know is that we, the fandom won't just stop there...

Alberu felt shivers down his spine as he recalled the very vivid and realistic experience he had inside his dream.

Cale: I am so telling this to Tasha, my esteemed and very much adored Beru <3

Alberu: JUST CALL ME HYUNG PLEASE!!

The trauma seemed to have sunken deep into his mind that every time Cale calls him by that nickname, he subconsciously touches his hair and nose in order to reassure himself that it's still there.

I'm tagging these superb beings for making the thread LEGENDARY: @cale-alberu @chunnicalesimp @thescarletguard @trashduchesshenituse-reblogs @farmercale @just-a-sleepy-person @annerisk @pile-of-sticks @trash-duchess-henituse @icyteaa

#tcf #trash of the count's family #tcf crack #incorrect tcf quotes #alberu crossman #cale henituse #CALEBERU #First Fanfic but it's crack #CRACK CRACK CRACKITY CRACK #Tasha mentioned #Sun God #God of Death #Lunatic Fandom #this is why I love this fandom

[miss-smutty]

Forbidden - Chapter 2

Summary- Jess couldn't stop thinking about the guy she'd met in the coffee shop, he was drop dead gorgeous, mature and everything she's always wanted but how would she find him again when she didn't even know his name?

Word count- 3.1K

Pairing- Prof!Chris Hemsworth x OC

Warnings- Swearing, slight smut talk

18+ only!

Disclaimer: This is an entire work of fiction/AU and has no affiliation to real life what so ever! This is a fictional story about fictional characters who happen to share names and faces with some real people.

Posted: 13th August 2021

Taglist:- @innerpaperexpertcloud @pandaxnienke @chickensarentcheap @jjpogueprincess @longlostinanotherworld @mostly-marvel-musings @darklydeliciousdesires @monet-belle

Chapter 1

The only thing was, he didn't know I was only twenty and I had no way of finding him again.

If fate did bring us back together, would he mind that I was still a student? That I couldn't even drink when we went on dates? 

Who am I kidding? Of course he would mind, he could get any woman he wanted, why would he want me?

"Morning, you feeling any better?" Ellie was awake before me as usual, she spent hours getting ready in the morning and was now sat at her desk finishing her make up.

"I suppose, can't beat myself up forever can I?" I was more the get up and go kind of girl, I could never understand why she'd take hours getting ready just to go to class but I suppose you never know who you're going to bump into.

"No you can not. Not when there's literally thousands of guys here to take your pick of." 

"Psh!" I finally pull myself out of bed after thinking about the thought of possibly bumping into my hunk again I changed my mind about making myself a little more presentable.

"What d'ya mean psh?" Ellie turns to look at you, her mascara wand in her hand and only one eye made up, she looked ridiculous. How could you take her seriously looking like that? 

"I mean I'm not interested in these childish boys anymore El, I want a man." 

"Fuck me, you spoke to the guy for two minutes and already you're acting like you've lost the love of your life." Wow, that hurt a little.

"I didn't say I was talking about him although it would be nice. I just meant I'm sick of playing all these childish games and never knowing where I stand. Don't you get sick of being the one who always falls deeper? Getting messed about and then being the one who's left hurt?" I joined her at the desk, putting on a little mascara and eyeliner. "I want a man who knows what he wants and treats me better. Don't you?"

"Well shit, when you put it like that I can't argue with you. It would be nice, hey I wonder if Mr Aussie has a brother?" She waggles her eyebrows at me, making me laugh. "I gotta go babe, what class you got?" 

"My first Comms class this morning." I did not sound excited at the prospect because I really wasn't. I'd put it off in freshman and sophomore years but thought I better get it over and done with before my senior year.

"Oh really? I didn't know you'd taken that class. I heard a load of seniors talking the other day and apparently the Professor is drop dead gorgeous. I was thinking about taking it up too just to see what all the fuss was about." 

"Well that should make the class a lot more interesting, maybe it isn't going to be as bad as I thought."

"See, every cloud and all that. See you tonight, fancy the bar?" She shouts over her shoulder as she walks towards the door.

"Sounds good, see you later."

I looked over my outfit I'd already chosen for the day, just some jeans and a plain t-shirt and realised it wouldn't do. Not when there's the prospect of a hot Professor to impress. My wardrobe desperately needed an update, especially now I was focused on finding myself a man and not one of these easily pleased college boys, that were happy with anything as long as I showed a bit of leg and tits. I settled with some tight black jeans with a black, lace-rimmed, cami body suit and a cute little cream, cropped blazer to finish it off. It made me feel confident when I checked myself out in the mirror and if I do say so myself I looked smoking hot. I checked the time on my phone, realising I was going to be late I quickly ran the curling tongs through the ends of my long blonde hair before grabbing my bag and rushing out of the door.

In the hopes of catching the eye of this new professor I'd completely forgotten about the hottie from the coffee shop, which was probably a good thing, it's not like I'm ever going to see him again. I kind of wished I would though, especially when I was looking and feeling this great but hey, on to bigger and better prospects.

I thought that being late would mean I'd be stuck with a lame choice of desk in class but luckily the back row was practically empty and I could hide in the corner of the lecture theatre. I laughed to myself when I realised that practically all the girls were occupying the front desks, obviously they'd heard the rumours too.

I pushed my hair behind my ears and fumbled in my bag for my pen and notepad, when I glanced to the door and caught the eyes of a student I hadn't seen before. I couldn't deny how attractive he was, with his bright blue eyes and floppy hair, oh and that smile. Wow! He smiled brightly at me as he made his way to the back of the class, his eyes glinting, shining like diamonds as he ignored the whispers from the girls at the front. The whole row of desks were free so when he chose the desk right next to me, my stomach fluttered.

I kept my eyes on my notepad, doodling on the front cover so as to avoid that eye contact with him again. I could see a cheeky glint in his eyes and I'd learnt from experience what that meant, trouble. I wasn't ready to get myself back into a situation like that again.

My eyes shot to the front as I heard the room erupt into wolf whistles, the girls at the front giggling and whispering to each other, I rolled my eyes at them, how embarrassing. 

Then I realised what all the fuss was about and my heart almost stopped beating, thudding against my chest at an alarming rate. How is this even possible? How the fuck could he be a professor? Surely he's not old enough. Oh fuck.

I sank lower in my chair, willing the ground to just swallow me up or maybe if I got low enough I would escape his notice. No such luck, his eyes scanned the class and when they fell on mine, his face lit up with anger? No not anger. A hunger. His eyes scanned my body, falling over my hair and down to my cleavage. I felt hot under his gaze, was I blushing? Sweating? Oh god, I've never wished for class to be over so much in my life.

My professor was the guy I'd been shamelessly flirting with in the coffee shop. I don't understand how this could be real, I know I wanted to bump into him again but this is such a cruel twist of fate. I'd never even suspected him to be a professor, he was so damn thick and muscly. The clothes he wore were so stylish and he looked way too young to be a professor. He must be so embarrassed that he'd been flirting with a student, I definitely was embarrassed that I'd been flirting with a professor.

I was so panicked, I didn't have a clue what to do in this situation. Squirming in my seat, trying to look anywhere but at the Professor but I could feel his eyes on me as he prepared for the class to start. People were still whispering amongst themselves and I risked a glance in his direction, that made me bite on to my lip to stop myself from screeching. His eyes were still on me, subtly glancing up from the pile of paper he'd just taken out of his bag, his eyebrows furrowed as he studied me. He certainly didn't look embarrassed infact he looked downright feral and the thought of it made my pussy clench, so much so I had to cross my legs under the table.

"I guess you're obsessed with this new Professor too, huh?" The guy next to me leant across his desk to whisper and fuck me if I wasn't imagining it but he was Australian too. Like have we just suddenly had a huge delivery of hot Australian guys arrive at the University? This was just downright unfair, how was I meant to cope?

"No, what makes you say that?" Why did I ask that question? Like it wasn't obvious how much I was sweating and squirming in my seat. Luckily he didn't have time to answer when my eyes were drawn back to the professor as he stood at the front of the class with his hands casually in his pockets and cleared his throat to get our attention.

If I wasn't mistaken, now he looked angry, the muscles in his neck more prominent as he glared between me and the guy next to me.

Was he angry that my attention had been taken away from him and was on another guy? Or because we were talking when we should've been paying attention?

"Now I've got your attention, we're going to use our first session to get to know each other a little better. You'll be doing quite a lot of speeches so it's best if you feel comfortable with one another. I'll start by introducing myself." That sexy accent makes me sweat even more, nevermind the fact that his eyes keep finding their way back to me. "So, I'm Professor Hemsworth and I'm originally from Melbourne in Australia." His eyes meet mine again, a knowing look in them.

"G'day mate." Some idiot from the back shouted, making everyone laugh and I couldn't help but join in a little. Professor Hemsworth smiled at the joke, his eyes creasing in the corners and his smile growing wider when he looked to me and saw me giggling.

"Yeah, very original. Alright, alight, settle down now." His voice is so commanding and authoritive, it's such a turn on. "So, I haven't been here for very long and I'm still getting used to how different things are here. The weather for one." He earned a couple of laughs from people. I couldn't keep my eyes off of him, he was so mesmerizing. The way his face animated as he spoke, his eyebrows raising and lips curling.

"I was going to ask you all to go easy on me but that's not going to happen is it?" He got a couple of head shakes and sympathetic looks from the girls. "No, I thought not. Well now it's my turn to torture you. I'll start alphabetically, stand up and tell everyone something about yourself." I swallowed back my fear, this is the reason I'd put off this class until now and as if it wasn't hard enough talking in front of a whole class I now had to do it in front of Professor Hemsworth too.

"Claire Abbott." Fuck. He'd started, at least my name would be one of the last ones.

"Hi I'm Claire." The tall blonde at the front stood up, twirling her hair around her finger and giggling like a child. I rolled my eyes at her and caught the Professor smirk in my direction. "I erm… I don't know what to say?" She looks up at the Professor questioningly.

"Just anything about yourself that we might find interesting, the first thing that comes to mind." He replied.

"Well I own four horses and I'm the cheer captain." I rolled my eyes again, scoffing quietly and Professor Hemsworth had to hold in a laugh as he looked in my direction.

"Talk about predictable." The guy next to me leaned over to whisper to me again.

"Totally." I laughed back at him and when I looked back at the Professor he was glaring straight at us again, his face set sternly.

"You two at the back, we'll wait for you shall we?" Professor Hemsworth said sternly, everyone turned around to look at us but I barely noticed, I was too focused on the way his stern voice made my cunt flutter when he called me out.

I didn't speak for the rest of the class, although I had the urge to, just to hear the way his voice sounded when he was angry. I couldn't concentrate on what the other students were saying, too focused on watching the way the Professor's face changed everytime he looked my way, which was pretty often, to my suprise.

"Jake Hudson." In my peripheral, I saw the guy next to me stand and when he did, Professor Hemsworth's eyes narrowed.

"Hi I'm Jake." He pushed his hands in to his pockets cooly, glancing at me as he did. "I'm also from Australia." He looked at the professor slyly, a smirk forming on his lips, laughing at the other students shouting G'day mate. "I was forced to move here but I'm glad I did because I've just met the most beautiful girl I've ever seen." The class burst into rounds of whistles and cheers as Jake sat down, smiling at me cockily. I could feel my cheeks blushing, I was flattered, he was absolutely gorgeous but hadn't I sworn of boys my own age?

Professor Hemsworth looked even more angry now as he loosened his tie a little, that black tie that draws my view down, like a arrow pointing straight to his cock. I tried to keep my eyes down on my desk, doodling in my notebook so I could avoid that hungry gaze, anxiously waiting for my turn. What the hell was I going to say?

"Jessica Watson." Shit. I stood slowly, trying to give myself more time to think, I couldn't stand everyone's eyes being on me especially the Professors and Jakes.

"Hey, I'm Jessica." I smiled nervously, tucking my hair behind my ear. "These last couple of days have been pretty eventful for me." I looked away from the chalk board so I could search Professor Hemsworth's face. "I'm living the life of a romance novels heroine and I'm excited to see what the next couple of days bring." I sat down keeping the gaze of the professor, I'd forgotten I was in a room full of people until I heard the ooh's and ahh's and my cheeks turned scarlet. The Professor's eyes glowed with heat as he watched me sit down before shaking his head and turning back to the class. Jake also caught my eye as I sat back at my desk, my cheeks still burning, he smiled at me, the kind of smile that crinkles your eyes. I felt kind of bad that he probably thought I was talking about him when in fact I was talking about our professor.

"I hope we all feel a bit more comfortable with each other now, some of you shared some pretty revealing things." He looked at me again. "Some of you, not so much." He raised his eyebrows at a group of guys. "I'll have a schedule for you all next time I see you, anybody that has any questions can see me after class, everyone else is free to leave." His eyes scanned me as he turned around to sit at his desk, I watched a couple of girls approach him predictably.

"Are you going to the party at our frat this weekend?" I had to reluctantly pull my eyes away from the Professor while Jake spoke, so he was a Alpha Kappa, not surprising really.

"Yeah, I think so. My roommate mentioned it."

"Oh good, I'll see you there then. Jessica." He smiled, standing from his seat.

"Jess." I corrected him. I hated being called Jessica, it was so formal.

"Well Jess, I'll see you around." He winked at me as he pulled his backpack on to his shoulder.

There were still a couple of girls taking up the Professor's attention and I wasn't sure yet whether I wanted to sneak past or wait to speak to him. I thought about it for a minute my fingertips drumming against my desk when the girls left and he was alone. As soon as the door closed, his gaze was on me and I could hear the silence in the room like a ringing in my ears. We stayed like that for a couple of seconds, staring at each other, no one saying a word until her cleared his throat. I blinked a couple of times, realising how stupid I must look before getting up from my seat and packing my things away.

"Did you need to talk Miss Watson?" I could hear amusement in his voice as he sat back on his desk casually, his arms folded across his chest.

"I erm…" I walked towards him, my legs feeling like jelly all of sudden and trying not to fall down the stairs. "I wanted to apologise, I had no idea you were a Professor." I said as I reached the bottom of the stairs, I didn't know what to do with myself but I was nervous about getting closer to him. He made the atmosphere feel tense, like if I was to reach out and touch him I would burn my fingers so I stood awkwardly at the bottom of the steps.

"There's no need to apologise Miss Watson, I also had no idea you were a student but I was hoping to bump into you again. Funny how things work out isn't it?" He cocked his eyebrow at me, still looking amused as he watched me squirm. When he said he'd been hoping to bump into me again it made me feel more confident, like I wasn't imagining the way he'd been looking at me for the last hour.

"I think fate can be rather cruel Professor Hemsworth." I smiled at him as I finally closed the distance between us, watching his eyes flare with hunger when I called him Professor.

"Oh really? Why is that Miss Watson?" His eyes narrowed, his Adams apple bobbing in his throat as I got close enough to touch him, I didn't though. I didn't dare break that boundary, not yet.

I smiled at him through my lashes, biting on to my lip. "I was hoping to bump into you again too, only now the thought of what could've happened will have to remain a fantasy." Wow! I was not expecting that, did I sound like a slut? Shit. I looked back up at him and caught him gulp, that hunger in his eyes shining, his pupils blown with lust, he loosened his tie even more and I caught a glimpse of his smooth chest and chickened out. The tension was way too much and I was about to do something I was going to regret, I could live with being a huge tease instead.

"I better get to my next class, we can't have anyone thinking I'm your favourite now can we?" I smiled to myself when I noticed the muscles in his jaw tense as he ground his teeth together. Turning to leave I looked back over my shoulder and his eyes were glued to my hips, watching them sway as I walked and I realised I had him exactly where I wanted him but was it worth the risk?

#smut #chris hemsworth #chris hemsworth fanfic #chris hemsworth smut #chris hemsworth x reader #chris hemsworth x you #chris hemsworth x oc #chris Hemsworth x ofc #chris Hemsworth series #thor series #thor smut #thor x you #chris Hemsworth #chris hemsworth fic #chris hems x you #chris hems x oc

[penname-artist]

Dusty & Ripslinger, not meant to be a ship but you can view it like that if you feel so moved XP

Rated G, very angsty-fluffy

World of Cars (whaaaat, they're NOT people??)

-

Rip was sure he would reach sleep soon, his body beginning to relax and shut down as he switched rhythms...

That is, until a small voice came out from his side.

"Rip...?"

The green and black Mustang groaned. 'Now what...', he thought. Shifting on his wheels, he turned to look towards the familiar airplane,

"What, Dusty? Did you have another nightm-" his mockery stopped cold in their tracks at Dusty's face, pale with palpable fear. He looked like he'd just had a near-death experience.

"Are you...okay?"

Dusty sniffled, trembling like a leaf. "...no..."

Ripslinger sighed, looking away. Yeah, like he knew what to do. The twins would get nightmares sometimes and demand to sleep with him, but for one thing their nightmares didn't actually scare them, they just made excuses, and for two...he knew them, at least. He was always around them. He didn't feel like he knew Dusty all that well. They'd only fixed their bridge what, two months ago now? The crop duster was still a foreign concept to the Mustang.

Skipper was practically on the other side of town. Dottie was almost equal distance. Rip had no idea where the fuck Chug and whatsitsname, Scratchy, lived. And to be honest...he didn't have the heart to push Dusty away. Not after what he'd done to him before. This was a new beginning, and a fragile one at that. He couldn't afford to make such a careless mistake.

He lifted his wing for the younger male. "Well, c'mon, quit standing there."

Dusty hesitated, dipping low to the ground as he sneaked under Rip's wing. The P-51 could only imagine why. How many folks go from nearly being drowned by someone to confiding in them for comfort? No one with an ounce of self-preservation in them, that was for sure.

He didn't deserve the second chance. It was all some freak turn of events anyways, what was he even doing, thinking he could turn around and make it up to the air tractor for near-murder, for everything he'd said and did-

Dusty snuggled under his frame, releasing a sigh as the tremors in his body started to ebb away. He was a lot warmer than Rip expected, especially against his back and down his flanks.

"Do you...want to talk about it?" Rip ventured, hyperaware of the awkward silence between them.

"...not really." Dusty said, "it's just the...same old junk it always is."

"I can't say I know what the junk is. But I could guess..."

"Its not about you." Dusty said. Rip glanced down at him,

"What...else would it be??"

Dusty's lip tightened. He fumbled his tire into the ground, focusing on the soft breaths through their exhausts slowly grazing over his paint.

"...I told you about the firefighting thing, yes?"

"At some point, yeah."

"And that there was a big park fire? Like, bigger than its ever been?"

Ripslinger looked away, "Ssssomething like that? Maybe?"

"Okay, well, um...I was...I had been trying to contain it in one area with the chief. But I was messed up, I did some stupid shit, and...he got hurt, because of me. I just can't put it down. I know it's fine now, I know he doesn't blame me for it, but...it doesn't change the fact that it still happened..."

Dusty's voice grew shakey, "I just...don't know how to handle it, how am I supposed to forgive myself for being the reason someone else got hurt..."

"I can't imagine how that must feel. Oh, wait." Ripslinger said. Dusty scoffed,

"Well you don't have to be an ass about it, I can just go-"

"No no," Rip corrected, "I get it. I really do. Ah, fuck it...you think I don't feel bad about 2013?"

"I...honestly never thought you would..." Dusty said.

"Uh, yeah," Rip continued, "and it's been eating me alive for I don't know how fucking long now. I didn't expect I'd ever get the chance to fix that. I don't deserve to get another chance. I don't even know what compelled you to let me."

"Don't say that, of course you deserve another chance." Dusty said, "because I know you've changed. You don't have to beat your..self up, about...something in the past aughhh, it's the same-..."

"Tch, and you didn't believe me when I said I understood."

Dusty smiled, faintly. "Yeah. I guess it's a good thing you're here. Skip's been kind of saying the same thing, "don't worry about it" and "don't blame yourself", and I do believe him, I just...I could never do it. I never understood how."

He tilted up to look at Rip, their bodies touching a little more firmly,

"How did you manage to overcome the guilt?"

The corner of Rip's mouth pulled, "I...haven't. Yet. Not fully. But...I know that it's in the past. And it's not right now. And I just have to...I don't know. Remember that. I'm not the same bastard. You're not the same bastard. I'm a whole new shade of bastard."

Dusty gave the meekest little chuckle, "I like the new bastard though. He's pretty cool."

Rip rolled his eyes, "don't make me regret letting you sleep over here."

"Yeah yeah, keep your bad guy image." Dusty said. He yawned, stretching himself out before settling back down into the mat.

"Thanks for sticking around. I'm glad to have someone that understands..."

Ripslinger watched the orange and white planes eyes slip closed.

"Yeah," he said, "I'm glad for that, too."

#disney planes #disneyplanes #planes fire and rescue #disney planes 2 #dusty crophopper #ripslinger

[vivithefolle]

Hey there! Can you tell me what's your opinion about Giny in HBP because I really hated what JKR did to her character. Until GOF she was a caring sister that understands alot about Rons sensitivities and then she turns into a person that completely ignores her brother feelings. Her attitude toward him at HBP is aggressive and disrespectful from the beginning. She wants to prove that she is not a child but she is acting like one in many occasions, she tripped Ron in front of the entire family because he wanted a kiss from Fleur and then she virgin shamed him in front of Harry when he called her out for snogging Dean which it wasn't cool but still damn you can't just throw salt to your brothers wounds like that. There was no remorse for the mess she created from that. Generally she showed 0 sympathy for Ron and just never took him seriously through the entire book. He is her brother, she defently loves him but she just did her best not to show him and the poor guy seemed he couldn't give her the cold shoulder not even for a day, he was just worried for his little sister. Anyway maybe all this is in my head but after reading HBP again I just felt angry and sad. Take care!

English is not my first language I hope there are not to many mistakes up there😔

Don’t worry, your English is great!

I am also salty at the way Ginny treated Ron in HBP, I find it... just, really annoying how HBP is basically the giant “let’s all shit on Ron” parade. Even Harry wasn’t spared - yes, he does the awesome Felix Felicis fake-out that proves just how much he believes in Ron, he’s got times where he tries to bolster Ron’s spirits and confidence and is generally much more concerned about Ron’s feelings than he was in Book 5, but... well, he still saw Ron as being unreasonable when Ron was angry about Hermione’s canary attack... like kinda fuck you Harry?

But yeah Ginny in HBP was generally... ugh.

I’m gonna copy-paste a bit of my Quora answer about that:

My own explanation for the deterioration of Ron and Ginny’s relationship is that Tom Riddle planted the seeds for it.

He pretended to be Ginny’s friend at first, and of course Ginny would complain or gush about her family to her new friend. Things like “Percy keeps babying me but I’m not a child anymore!” or “Ron and I have always teamed up against Fred and George!” or “Ron is friends with Harry Potter, can you imagine?”, and Tom would catch on quickly and realize that to keep Ginny talking about Harry, he first has to bring up Ron more, then subtly present Harry as the more interesting thing to talk about.

In other words, Tom Riddle would have acted like a typical Harmonian (full offense xoxo).

“Oh, he told you he was too busy doing homework? That’s not very nice. I know the Hogwarts curriculum is heavy, but one should always take time for family. Think of how Harry Potter must feel, not having a family of his own. Your brother seems quite ungrateful to me, not knowing to appreciate what he has. But I suppose I wouldn’t know, seeing as I was an orphan myself…”

And little by little, Tom Riddle sowed those into Ginny’s psyche, and just because Tom died doesn’t mean that his influence on Ginny was gone.

Tom Riddle’s possession of Ginny would also leave traces on Ron - he’d feel horribly guilty for not paying enough attention to her, for not having known, for not realizing it sooner. So when Ginny starts dating boys, Ron is actively remembering what happened with Tom Riddle - he’s immediately on edge. Given that Ginny dates guys that are all older than her, Ron is probably even more worried.

And it all culminates with HBP, where Ginny acts a lot more spiteful to Ron for seemingly no reason at all - because he’s the last one of her brothers at Hogwarts. Fred and George are gone and won’t interfere with Ginny’s love life anymore - and we can suppose they did, because George says “size is no indication of power - look at Ginny”, as if he was speaking from experience - so Ron is the one last “threat” to deal with. Ginny doesn’t consider Ron a threat, far from it, but she seeks to emancipate herself. As the one last Weasley brother at Hogwarts, Ron is inherently in a position of authority when it comes to Ginny. And Ginny, like any rebellious teen trying to find themselves, wants to break free from authority figures.

It’s a conflict from both sides - Ginny isn’t the only one to blame, though I despise it when people try to pin it on “Ron being a misogynist”. Ron feared for his little sister’s safety, because he remembers all too well what happened the last time she trusted a boy older than her… and being a teenage boy and not having the maturity of a fully-grown adult, he can’t express that in the best way.

#vivi answers #ask #ginny weasley #ron weasley #ron weasley defense squad #ron weasley defence squad #half-blood prince #tom riddle #lord voldemort

[seeds-and-sins]

F**kin’ Diabolical (Chapter 6)

Master List

Pairing: Homelander / Original Female Character, Billy Butcher / Original Female Character

Rating: M (Strong language, sexual themes)

Decription: Carly Danvers is a reporter/radio show host/annoying little piece of- For reasons unknown to Vought, she decided to start a one man investigation on Vought’s operation. Her efforts had been quite successful so far, so much so that Stillwell would have done anything to see the young girl dead. Turns out Stillwell didn’t have to do anything at all, while one piece of evidence against Vought causes Danvers to fly too close to the sun. And Homelander flies after her.

Chapter Summary; Homelander agrees to take Carly to her apartment, then someone knocks at her door.

 The flight to her apartment complex was absolute hell, just like the rest of her day had been so far. If Homelander hadn't been there to catch her every time she came plummeting down to earth, she would have killed a lot of people, she was sure of it. Not to mention, the feeling of being 20,000 feet, or higher, in the sky was not easy to get used to. She hated roller coasters and airplanes and zip lining, and just about everything that had to do with heights, so when Homelander urged her to go higher she felt like her heart stopped. It was beautiful, a fantastic view of the city. However, she was certainly not used to flying in the sky, or being bulletproof, or having lasers shoot out of her eyes, so she couldn’t really enjoy that view. Homelander had to keep reminding her that if she really did fall, "You won't feel a thing", which only made reality progressively worse for her. 

    When they finally arrived she had ended up clutching to him like he was her last breath, begging him to sink the landing so she wouldn't blow clear through several stories in her descent. She knew how amusing this was for him, she could see it in his eyes every time she would looked to him for help. He was the worst person she could seek guidance from, but in these desperate times, he was the only person she could seek guidance from. He had been manhandling her, dragging her around, criticizing her for not being able to catch on so quick. This must had been some sort of dream for him.

   Then, of course, there was the name: Lady Liberty. It was catchy and classy, but who the fuck would come up with a name on the fly like that?! No. He had been ready, waiting, ever so patient, and he said it like she was already a supe, like the name was burned into her flesh at birth. She imagined herself flying beside him, wearing his colors, flashing his abilities, what a sickening thought to think that would get him off? She used to laud the man, then she found out he was just some lab experiment, like all the other supers, and now she was too. What even was this? What was she doing? Where was she? Oh yeah, she was in her apartment. She didn’t even realize because it didn't feel the same, she didn't feel like herself. 

   When she entered, Homelander in tow, she went straight for the alcohol. She scurried around the bar counter, grabbed a scotch glass and poured some whiskey for herself. Homelander watched silently as she downed the whole glass in one gulp, then she tipped her head forward, wincing her lips and poured another. He then continued to stalk around, probing the entire apartment, although she knew he had seen it before. Despite it being speculation, she figured he had stalked her, or watched her in the past. The fact that he knew where she lived and that he knew where her clothes were was suspicious enough. With everything going on, she didn't really have much time to sort out her feelings on the matter. She downed another full glass, gulp after gulp. The burn of the whiskey melted into her, and she fucking needed it. 

"That won't work. Trust me." She caught her breath, hand clutching as gently at the bottle of whiskey as she could. 

"What won't?"

"You can't get-"

"Don't say it, Homelander. Don't you fucking say it." He shrugged, then continued to walk around the perimeter of her apartment, a full on inspection. "Can you not fucking act like you haven't seen this place before?" She left the whiskey and empty glass, turned off now by the fact that she wouldn't feel its effects no matter how hard she tried. 

"I did," He paused in stride, eyes focused out the window spanning the wall, where a balcony hung. "To retrieve your clothes, remember?" 

"Oh, don't play innocent, it doesn't suit you." Homelander snorted, almost nervously, then faced her again with a smile. 

"Carly, I don't have any idea what you are talking about." Her bare and dirty feet padded against the wood as she started towards the hall that lead to her bedroom.

"Sure you don't." She remarked sarcastically, zooming past him.

"Where are you going?"

"To take a shower. Go watch TV, or something." Carly did have a moment over by the bar, where she had to reel herself back into reality, yet again. Homelander was in her home and she had superpowers, it doesn't get more fucked than that. Even more so, Homelander had been spying on her for who knows how long, and he was in her living room, and she had superpowers. She needed a shower so bad. She needed to just wash all of this shit away, physically and emotionally. Homelander watched her disappear down the hall, she could feel his eyes piercing through her.

    She entered her room, closing the door behind her, as if that would stop the great Homelander. She rested her head back against the door, careful not to put all of her weight on it in fear of it breaking behind her. She closed her eyes, tried to settle in to this feeling that had been coursing through her since she woke up. She grabbed the hem of her shirt and pulled it over her head, tossing it into the hamper that stood not so far off by the door, leading into the bathroom. She then discarded the sweatpants, leaving her in nothing but her underwear. She turned to face the long side oval mirror on her nightstand, eyes softening at her damaged state. She looked like Carly, but she didn't feel like Carly. 

   She twisted her waist, above her hip sat a clear scar that trailed from around the curve of her side, up towards her rib cage, where it stopped. It was still there, so she must still be Carly. She watched her hand, mesmerized as it rose up to her cheek, fingers peddling against the flesh. The same flesh that can withstand anything that came its way, but it still felt soft, like Carly. The fingers slid up and over through her hair, where her lips parted and she could feel the oily strands between her fingers. She felt the tears blossom in her eyes, where oddly enough she still feel the heat in them from the heat vision. How can someone be a human one day, ever so vulnerable, then be an indestructible hero the next? She placed her hands on her waist now, taut beneath her fingers and she stared at her reflection again. She couldn't even look, the pose didn't make her feel any better or greater. It made her feel like a stranger. 

   In the reflection she saw her acoustic guitar, the solid black giving her some solace in these trying times. She stepped over to it, almost subconsciously, and picked up the neck. She settled herself down onto the edge of the bed, propping the guitar on her lap. Perhaps a somber tune would ease her mind, but before strumming at the strings her attention locked on something else. She caught sight of the wall beside her bed, it couldn't have gone unnoticed, it was a masterpiece of her own design. The sight of a thousand sticky notes and strung up pictures that she had painted, sketches that she had drawn. She mindlessly placed her guitar down beside her on the bed and stood, feet taking her to a single sketch that she had made so long ago. It was of Homelander.

   At the time she criticized herself; the nose was too crooked, or the eyes just weren't all too great, but no, the sketch was the perfect image of him. She remembered the pencil taking over her that day, and she didn't really know what drove her to sit down and crank out his image. Of all the things she had drawn, Homelander was certainly the most elaborated sketch. The way she traced his jawline, the crisps of his hair, the subtle tiredness in his eyes, did he-they even feel exhaustion? She didn't feel exhausted right now, was that another post-compound quality? 

    She closed her eyes, and honed into the silence, giving herself a moment to enjoy this peace while it lasted. Then something happened all too soon, she found herself unprepared for it. She could hear voices, the honking of cars, the breathing, the heartbeats, the wind, it was like in the hospital that morning. Her eyes fluttered open, and her expression turned fierce. She couldn't even enjoy silence, not without hearing everybody else. She huffed out her agitation, then stormed towards the small bathroom, where maybe the water could do her some good. 

   It was a thin bathroom, and very cluttered, cluttered with an array of hair products, makeup, perfumes, and lotions. There was no bath tub, much to her distaste when she originally got the apartment. The thin brick that separated the floor and the shower tile was all that kept water from leaking everywhere. The curtain was an off blue, that matched the navy bath mat she had put down. She finally removed her underwear, tossing it into the hamper with her other clothes. She didn't waste any time, finding herself under the rusty shower faucet and turning the lever over. She made the water as hot as possible, knowing that too hot was no problem for her now, and also that she needed that steam and that warm embrace. 

   She sat under the water, feeling it trickle down over her, her blonde strands soaking and sticking to her skin. She enjoyed the stream as it caressed her back massaged her, allowed herself to be engulfed in its blissful touch. She moaned out her approval and settled her forearms against the wall above her, resting her forehead on them. This felt nice, after a second of relaxing under the water she was already feeling calm. She controlled her breathing, trying to find that meditative state that would allow her to just... Not think. Even when there was so much to think about, so much coursing through her mind. And Allen? She had tried not to think about him, about how he died. She wished he hadn't, she wished none of this would have happened, she should have listened to his warnings. What soared through her mind regarding last night made her feel disgusted in herself. She had done some horrific things and she was sure the things she couldn't remember were probably worse. 

Knock! Knock! Knock!

Where was that coming from?! What was that?!

Knock! Kno- 

THE DOOR!

   Carly felt her breath catch, she jumped out of the shower, part of the tile cracking under her as she went. She snatched her bathrobe of the hanger on the door, the door ripped off its hinges from the force. 

“Fuck me.” She ground out, but kept moving anyways. Her toes left puddles of water after her as she threw on the silk white fabric. She jogged into the living room, Homelander was calmly sitting on the couch, arm splayed out over its rest, the news on full blast. 

"Who the fuck is this guy?" Homelander asked plainly and she ignored him as she tied her robe and answered the door, cracking it and peaking her head out. 

"Billy?" She breathed out, fighting the urge to swing the door open and hug him. His eyes furrowed in confusion at the sight of her, wet hair, flushed cheeks, a bath robe?

"Carly, what the bloody fuck?! I thought you were in the hospital?" She shot her eyes over her shoulder at Homelander, who was glaring at her, unsure of her next move, but she went anyways. She exited her apartment, closing the door behind her. Billy staring at her with this crazed, flustered look in his eyes. She was fine, intact, critical condition, his ass?!

"Billy, this is a bad time." She stated, and his expression turned more into concern. He stepped closer and she stepped back, she was so afraid of touching him. One wrong move and she could kill him, with no control over her powers, this was a bad idea. Billy's expression hardened and he flung his hands up in the air.

"Carls, are you okay?! What happened?!" She noticed the flowers, and a part of her wanted to just hug him, hug him so bad. She needed a good hug, from someone, anyone. Billy would probably give the best hugs. He was such a burly guy and during their talks in the elevator she could smell the scent of him: a mix between cigarettes and cheap cologne.

"Are those for me?" She crooned, he had forgotten about the flowers, still shocked that she was even standing before him. He held the flowers up with a snort, perhaps to lighten his own frustration over the situation. 

"Yeah, I went to the hospital to go find ya' and you were fuckin' gone..." She opened her mouth to respond, but he kept going, gesturing to her front door. "Then I come 'ere, and hear your TV on, thought some bloody shitfaced rocker had taken up your apartment."

"Oh, yeah..." She was at a loss for words, how do you explain to someone that you are dangerous? That you are a supe now? Especially after making a show against superheroes. 

"And then, I heard that Homelander came to see ya'?!" He said, his tone filled with disbelief. "I go to your room and it was absolutely trashed! I thought you were dead!"

"Billy, I-"

"What? It's alright, you can tell me. I am here for ya'." His lips quirked up slightly, despite his frustration, she looked under extreme distress. She needed someone to comfort her, not berate her. He'd never seen her so torn apart, and it really did hurt him to see her like this. This was far worse than going to visit a burn victim, much like he had originally expected, she was far worse than that.

"Billy..." Her voice shaky, and her lip wobbled as if she was about to cry. He stepped close again, she didn't move, he placed a hand on her shoulder.

"Carly, I have never seen you like this before. You have to talk to me?"

"It's okay, I-I am fine." She held her hand out for the flowers, he hesitantly handed them to her, then gave her some distance. Still reeling in confusion and concern, he watched her usher herself through the door.

"Hey?" He said, she paused in the doorway, unable to meet his stare. "I just want ya' to know, I am..." He cleared his throat. "Always here for ya, alright? Us ugly faces got to stick together." She smiled sadly and nodded her head. 

"I will remember that. Thank you...” She gulped, “For everything." He gave her a curt nod as she disappeared behind the door. She held the flowers in her hand, staring at the wood blankly. She exhaled a trembling breath, and then slowly turned to Homelander. He was standing, hard glare on his face, arms crossed, about to reprimand her. 

“Now what the fuc-” She dropped the flowers and rushed towards him, her arms snaking around his sides and his hands flew up in surprise. He could feel all of her against, the thin material of the bath robe shielded nothing as her form sculpted so perfectly with his own. He had to admit. He had been watching her earlier, every step, every movement, threw him in a daze. She was perfect. He knew she would be. He could feel her body’s closeness start to have an effect on him and he was worried she would notice. "C-Carly..." He protested in a hushed whispered, she pressed her body into him even further, hugging him as hard as she could. He would have gasped if it hadn’t been for him biting his lip and clutching his gloves so firmly. His own arms soon wrapped around her, returning the embrace, although awkwardly. 

She just needed a hug, and Homelander was the only person she could give one too.

#homelander x ofc #billy butcher x ofc #homelander #billy butcher #vought #the seven #the boys #madelyn stillwell

[boxesblr]

Itse me, shy!

Holy FUCK, I thought the last chapter was intense but this one, whoo boy! The things youve dropped are awesome omg! (Sorry anyone who reads this who hasn't checked out the newest chapter of NQM, massive spoilers ahead!)

Them being immortals makes so much sense! Of course they can be revived, they can't die! And I dont know why but it also makes sense that Ze has never seen Chilled die before. Does that mean they don't die of age either? Will they just keep ageing?

It must be terrifying to wake up, knowing you have to be dead but being alive, I am so glad all of them found each other and support each other. Heck yeah to Steven squared and Chilled!

I love that Chilled and Ze have been friends for so long, Chilled thinks he's immortal and he tells Ze pretty much immediately. Like, the mugging happened in college and the party did too, so I assume it was pretty quick after. And Ze too, just boom. It's about the trust, man.

I also enjoy the portrayal of Chilleds touchiness, physical closeness between friends always has me SO weak. Them just casually both going to Zes? Finally, some good fucking food.

And Aphex' joy upon seeing Ze happy (which is so wholesome still btw) makes even more sense if you put in context how long he's known Ze and how close all three must have gotten in a "Us against the world" way. Aphex is a true friend, the realest of bros.

Each one's motivations are so incredibly human, I think Toasts story is moving and it must have been awful to lie all the time, I am glad he can now live his truth (almost said he can now live freely but uh... Not really lmao)

Shubble and Platy just being so wholesome is 😭😭 i love them so much!

I see, Cheesy is baby boy baby and must be protected. Wouldn't he see that his fear is unjustified, considering the others died way more often than him and they always come back?

Walking into a bear trap must hurt so much, I am surprised Ze didn't scream tbh

I adore the way you introduced Dumbdog, genius. I am so impressed, I didn't expect this at all! The presentation, the cut off, the suspense? P e r f e c t i o n

So Dumbdog was the mystery person you wanted to introduce, good to know! It's nine people we know of then, plus however many people are trying to keep them there. It has to be at least two (unknown gender tho) because they did say we!

Did Tays worst nightmare come true and they are experiments? Would that mean that the wolf attacks are planned? It would be hilarious if they aren't ngl, like jesus Ze still runs into them for no reason lmao

Dumbdog isn't part of their group it seems like, but where did he come from? Who is he? What role is he? Can he even have a role?

So many questions have opened up! I don't need sleep, I need answers xD

Lastly, I just wanna mention how I think it's so funny how Ze constantly gets found and rescued, modern princess peach right here, now go support your Mario!

Hope you're having an awesome day!

Hey Shy! Thank you once again for reading and asking, it always makes me happy to see an ask from you! I’m glad you liked that chapter <3

This chapter was so much fun to write even if it stressed me out a little because of making sure I get across the logic and backstories well :D For aging, I would imagine its greatly reduced as they seem to regenerate at an accelerated speed rather than being impervious to damage, so for aging I think it would make the most sense that physically aging would be caveated by the idea that any sort of degeneration of their body wouldn’t be (as) drastic like it would for anyone else. But beyond that I’m only mortal and can only imagine how terrifying it must be!

I love writing friendships with casual intimacy and trust, it feels all cosy. And like in games, even when Ze and Chilled suspect and betray eachother, it never lasts too long! I’m glad you enjoy how I’ve portrayed them and Aphex too, obviously I’ve taken their online personalities into the characters in the story and I feel like what makes so much of their characters are the dynamics they have with eachother. I think having the backstory for them adds some more sadness and angst and happiness too at the earlier chapter with their adventure? 

Trying to think about the character’s motivations and individual fears was nice because I think most people would have common thoughts about being immortal but different specifics would really stick with different people based on their personalities and experiences! I think for Cheesy the idea is that maybe he’ll get complacent, or that he’s been granted something that might one day be ripped from him, as no one really knows how or why they can come back to life. People generally change a lot more when they’re younger (adolesence), and Cheesy being the closest to that experience must’ve seen his peers changing more than he did, and it’s a reminder of how quick mortality can be maybe

Numbness and body adrenaline maybe helped Ze in the not-screaming department but yes, he’s definitely in a lot of pain aaaa

Thank you so much!! <3 I love dumbdog and thought that it made a lot of sense for him to be a hybrid given his online persona! He’s also a comfy streamer so maybe I had some bias in wanting to include him haha

The people trying to keep them here is definitely more than one, which is like the base game (more than blackout DLC which i miss a lot) but I’m glad you noticed the ‘we’!! I think that Tay’s personal fears about being experimented on also give her a lot more reason to be paranoid and reckless, not justifying what she did in the last chapter but! 

Dumbdog is very much a mystery and I look forward to answering those questions about him, I hope you enjoy where I go with it!! Thank you so much for engaging with it because I do have a fear that the direction I take the story won’t be where people want it to go, but I’m having fun doing it still :D

Ze’s a strong independent damsel in distress who does need a man :’)

Please get some sleep (even though I’m not replying straight away and you probably already did) and I hope you have a good day!!

#Not Quite Myself

[gendryaweeklyupdates]

All Updated Gendrya work this week (08-Mar-20 to 14-Mar-20)

Note: all dates are in dd-mm-yy

Redemption by LME ( 16/? as of 08-3-20)

Imagining Arya and Gendry's reunion when the Game of Thrones is finally over. This story is focused on the voyage of 'Arya the Adventurer' on her ship Nymeria, after she asks, "What is west of Westeros?".

Rating:M

Even the Darkest Night will end. by @lianria (12/? as of 08-3-20)

Arya reaches out to old allies for help, and the pack begins to reform. Pack doesn't always mean just wolves anymore.

Rating:M

Runaway With Me - Part 2 by @the-end-is-kigh (14/14 as of 08-3-20) (multiple updates this week)

Arya Stark was not happy when her family was forced to move to King's Landing due to her father's promotion. But at the same time, it allowed her to escape her problems back home, allowed her to meet a cousin she'd never known, get a job doing what she loves and there's the issue of a certain mechanic.

Maybe the move would be worth it?

But the problems from back home follow her, her only hope is to keep running, until she can't run any more.

This is the reaction mostly to the letters Arya and Gendry send back home.

Rating:T

One for the road by @obsessivewriter (9/9 as of 8-3-20)

As a survivor, Arya always knew she was living on borrowed time, five years in remission she had done almost everything on her bucket list until her time ran up.

That time is up now and there is only one thing she never got to experience: falling in love.

Gendry will do anything for his best friend, and really how hard could it be to fall for someone you already love?

Rating:E

The Ghost of the Red Keep by TheDameintheRaininMaine (4/? as of 8-3-20)

Lysa never sent her letter. Bran was never pushed. Five Starks make the journey to King's Landing.

And one day beneath the Red Keep, Arya hears a voice she decides must be a ghost.

Rating:T

Evading Capture by @katlyn1948 (9/? as of 8-3-20)

Arya evades the brotherhood, but fails and Gendry can't seem to keep his eyes of their captive.

Rating:M

A Thunder In Our Hearts by hungerwolves (2/? as of 9-3-20)

In which Arya has to marry lord Gendry Baratheon, the legitimized bastard son of the King in the South, to avoid war between the 6 Kingdoms and the North.

Unrated

Heavy Lies The Crown by OneMoreNight1996 (7/? as of 13-3-20) (multiple updates this week)

When the truth of the Baratheon children is revealed, King Robert orders the execution of Cersei and Jamie Lannister and exiles the children to Casterly Rock. This leaves him without an heir so he is quickly forced to legitimize a bastard blacksmith brought to him by Ned Stark and, in the eye of the King, his heir is in need of a bride.

Rating:E

The Last Time by @yanak324 (14/? as of 9-3-20)

After a decade away, Arya returns home. Encountering the boy she left behind is not in her plans.

At least she’s always known the Gods have a funny sense of humor.

Rating:E

True Love's Kiss by @prettyyvacant321 (2/? as of 9-3-20)

Gendrya Sleeping Beauty AU with a few twists!

Based off the January (oops I'm late but what's new) prompt from @days-of-gendrya on Tumblr.

Rating:M

Head of the River by @everyl1ttleth1ng (13/? as of 14-3-20) (multiple updates this week)

Gendry Waters, multiple Pan Westeros Games gold medal winning rower, has been the highly successful and well-loved Director of Rowing at the exclusive Riverlands Grammar School for six years now. Ser Davos Seaworth has very recently retired as school principal and been replaced by the much younger multiple gold medal winning fencer from the North, Dr Arya Stark.

One morning Gendry finds himself approached by his new boss. She wants him to teach her how to row.

(In which Gendry is still rowing AND Gendry and Arya spend time in a boat together.)

Rating:T

Gym Daze by @dragongoddess13 (5/5 as of 14-3-20) (multiple updates this week)

For years they worked out together. In high school he drove them to the gym every afternoon after school or after extracurriculars. In college, they went first thing in the morning before classes and after graduation, when they both moved down to King’s Landing, they found a new gym and a new schedule. 

Or how Gendry and Arya learn to use their frequent trips to the gym in ways that were a whole new kind of satisfying.

Rating:E

I Wanna Be Yours by @sneetchstar (15/? as of 12-3-20) (multiple updates this week)

Gendrya one-shot collection.

Rating:E

When Winter Comes by OneMoreNight1996 (2/? as of 11-3-20) (multiple updates this week)

Winter sets in after the Long Night is over leaving everyone stuck in Winterfell and unable to go south. This causes some tension within the group as secrets are revealed and promises are made.

Rating:E

The odd girl who smelled the rain by @blue-nebulae (5/6 as of 12-3-20)

Gendry noticed her the very first week of the semester.

Something about her caught his eye, he didn’t know exactly what it was, perhaps the fact that she was a very pretty short girl or the fact that she was carrying a bright yellow umbrella, and using it almost like a cane, on a perfect summery day and that was odd.

Rating:T

More Than Words by @keepitmovinshawty (6/? as of 12-3-20)

Arry and Steffon first meet on the beaches of Braavos while escaping their responsibilities. Both ignorant of their true identities, it comes as a surprise when they meet again on a more formal scale and try to handle a relationship while the world watches.

Rating:M

Bad Pick-up lines Work Best by JoPoGirlsKickAss (17/? as of 12-3-20)

Gendry's life is suddenly sprinkled with bad pick up lines--at first he ignores them, then he realizes they might all be from the same person and that person might just be the death of him.

In which Arya flirts hard and Gendry is stuck between a rock and a hard place.

[Slow(ish) burn until chapter 15]

Rating:T

The Lost Prince by @psychvamp25 (37/40 as of 12-3-20)

The first Baratheon prince died in his crib, this is known.

Arya Stark comes to King's Landing when her father becomes Hand of King and her sister is set to marry the Crown Prince, Joffrey. Arya journeys to the street of steal and meets a handsome young blacksmith. Little does she know, that her relationship with this blacksmith could change the future of the Seven Kingdoms.

Rating:T

A Dance of Shadows by Faiseuse_d_Histoires (29/50 as of 13-3-20) (significant Gendrya with Jonerys)

It’s been one year since the death of Daenerys Targaryen, called by some "the mad queen", and the North and the Six Kingdoms try to rebuild all that was lost. Jon Snow had disappeared beyond the Wall, his wolf last seen near Hardhome. Queen Sansa "the Wise" is facing unrest in the nearby villages, which leads her to make questionable choices in the eyes of her people. In the South, king Bran the Broken fell seemingly ill and fear for his life makes people uneasy about the succession.

As once again instability risks to break the kingdoms, a hero reappears, with the name of a long-feared enemy, and an old song is beginning to be sung once again, with fire and ice meeting for one last dance.

Not mentioned, but coming: Some news from the iron islands and Dorne, trouble coming from Essos… oh, and some resurrection, perhaps.

Rating:M

The Prince That Didn't Come by @igitnothin (61/63 as of 13-3-20)

On an normal winter day, Hot Pie happily delivered two meat pies and a jug of ale to a waiting table.

There was no interruption from his ordinary work. No happy reunion, no thrilling tales, and no missing Stark girls to steal his food and change the world. There was nothing but another group of hungry mouths to feed.

Or Arya Stark does not visit the Crossroads Inn, and the world of ice and fire is changed forever.

Unrated

then we take berlin by @evax3 (14/20 as of 13-3-20) (equally Theon/Robb)

After Petyr Baelish tragically suffocated on a gigot before he was able to poison Jon Arryn, Westeros fought in united strength against the White Walkers and built up a diplomatic relationship with Queen Daenerys in Meereen after the victory.

So, the land was at peace, the winter was over and 2 years later Theon, Robb and Arya sat together in Winterfell, bored to fucking death.

Fortunately, distraction seemed within reach, as Theon discovered a book in Maester Luwin’s library, maybe solving their problem. Promising the opportunity to travel back in time and experience one of the big battles again, they’d fought in the past.

But mixing the ingredients, something went wrong and instead of arriving back on the field of the second Battle of the Dawn, they found themselves in Berlin of the 21st century, still wearing their thick furs and understanding not a single word.

Putting their hopes in a certain dark-haired goldsmith from California, who kindly takes them in, they tried their best to somehow find their way back home and find a lot more in the process.

Rating:M

Prompts by @psychvamp25 (9/? as of 14-3-20) (multiple updates this week)

A collection of any of the prompts I get. Will be standalone little ficlets.

Rating:G

Through the storms by @nikelaos87 (3/? as of 14-3-20)

The sequel of "An empty shell"

«I won't marry you»

«You can't»

Rating:M

You Feel Like Moonlight On My Skin by @randifrnz (3/5 as of 14-3-20)

After six months in the capital, it is time the future King and Queen of Westeros continue the envoy through the kingdoms of the lands to know and build relationships with their people. Throughout their journey, the crown prince and princess grow even closer and grow up as well. Arya navigates what it means to be a woman grown and what it means to want.

Rating:E

Masterlink for the week: here

#gendrya #gendryaweekly #gendrya weekly #gendrya fanfiction #arya stark x gendry waters #arya x gendry #gendryafics