#and i don't want to have to worry about whether my tone in an email containing 1 item of information is rude

[coffeeadict61]

Humans Are Weird: Auditory Processing Disorder

Report # 306

Topic: Auditory Processing Disorder

APD: disorder of the auditory (hearing) system that causes a disruption in the way that an individual's brain understands what they are hearing.

Four days ago I was doing my monthly meeting with the electrical department, receiving updates on our monthly usage, needed parts, and checking up on general morale. (The transcript of that meeting is already turned in.) After the meeting we had refreshments and I discovered Lucy (previously mentioned in report #286) pouting in a corner. I inquired what was bothering her. She said, "The ship's head medic just diagnosed me with APD but he wasn't trained to treat it." I asked for further information on the condition. She listed several of her personal symptoms. "It means I don't always catch what people say. It feels like my brain doesn't want to listen. In one ear and out the other making me look stupid to however I talk to. It's connected to my misophonia, and the fact I was born really premature."

I was unsure how to comfort her so I made no effort. This seemed to work for Lucy kept speaking.

"And what's worse is there's nothing I can do! We don't have a speech therapist aboard or even any research materials! Its starting to affect my work performance. On top of decoding, hypersensitivity, and prosodic problems, I have integration issues which mean its really hard for me to focus on what people are saying when I'm doing something. Which freaking sucks when you're part of a team!" I had no clue what she was really talking about but gave her a hug (human gesture of enveloping one in your arms as a sign of comfort or safety), and she apologized for "venting" to me.

She then spoke on how her crew mates just thought she was "slow" or wasn't good at her job. They questioned if she was capable because she would follow directions incorrectly and she was worried she'd be replaced with someone "less problematic". I tried to assure her that I would help anyway I could on her behalf. Never again will I doubt a human's sincerity.

After some of my own personal research I have made a list of the different types and their definitions for your education on the subject:

Hypersensitivity – Hypersensitivity to sound is often diagnosed as misophonia or hyperacusis. Misophonia is when people have adverse physical reactions to sounds, such as becoming nauseated by the sound of chewing or slurping. Hyperacusis, on the other hand, is characterized by a sensitivity to sounds. For some, this means that white noise can be deafening, even causing physical pain.

Decoding – Decoding difficulties involve a lack of figuring out words that are spoken. They hear the sounds, but their brains do not process them as words.

Integration – Integration applies to those who struggle to do multiple things while listening. Such multi-tasking may be writing notes and listening, or having conversations while typing an email.

Prosodic – Prosodic refers to people who have trouble with tone, inflection, and implied meaning. A question and exclamation are processed identically in their brains. Their speech is also often monotone.

Organizational – Finally, organizational, or output, is often characterized by not recalling information in a specific order or having difficulty with noisy situations.

Honestly, Humans are so diverse and unpredictable. To think that different "problems" or " abnormalities " within their mind or body can lead to even more similar issues astounds me. They are so intricate in a way my species has never been. Despite the struggles that their disorders, and conditions being, I think it's strangely beautiful. Maybe that's just me, but I have a new appreciation for them.

I am requesting the presence of a speech therapist, whether physically or digitally, to be readily available to our crew. We must also add APD onto our medics research requirements. It is not an overly complicated subject to be fluent in. I also request that Lucy's diagnoses be added to her list of wrongful termination along with her gender, age, and race. No one should feel their position is at risk because of a disorder or disability. I also request that a written copy of daily instruction be printed for her if necessary. She is one of our best electricians and I mean to keep her employed here as long as she wants.

Human Observer #5743

#humans are weird #humans are space orcs #APD #auditory processing disorder #its an educational one folks #Lucy #Human Observer #Human observer5743 #Lucy is back #space #science fiction #sci fi #aliens #hope you like this one guys

[bodycountgame]

Hi! I'm new! I just start playing the demo and... I know this is a lot of work and you're not force to do this but, could you add a tone indicator? I have seen this in others IF that I read. I would like to know when an answer is flirting, lighthearted, serious and all that. I'm autistic and english is not my native language (sorry if there are mistakes in this ask) so it's difficult for me to understand some dialogues 😞

And If this is already an option where do I activate it? (I'm playing on mobile)

hi anon! i've thought before about adding a tone indicator and i'm not sure it would work for a couple of reasons.

the first is that the tone of the dialogue options you select in body count varies depending on MC's personality - what one MC says grumpily another MC might smile through, etc etc. i hope that when you play through with different MCs even the same options can sort of feel distinct for that reason.

secondly, i know that some IFs structure their dialogue responses around specific tones (i.e. a friendly one, a flirty one, a sarcastic one, a grumpy one) and can provide tone indicators fairly simply on that basis. body count isn't really structured like that and each dialogue option could arguably be a multitude of different things depending on where the conversation continues to go (e.g. what starts as a sort of aggy conversation can often turn flirty, so i feel like labelling it as negative might be misleading when future flirts are locked behind it?)

i also struggle with whether to label the MC's intention or the character's response to dialogue - just because MC is trying to be nice doesn't always mean it will be well received, and i worry that readers any classification might be more misleading than helpful on that basis when (i.e. if i say an option is a friendly because mc is trying to be friendly, and then the character they're talking to rebuffs them horribly because they don't like that, and the reader is like nell what the hell you said this would be a nice chat???)

all this to say in a very wordy way that i don't know how i would make a tone indicator work. however, i am totally open to continuing a conversation about it. are there specific options that you struggle with more than others? are there specific choices that are particularly unclear? are there specific choices that are more clear and styles of choice that i should use more going forward? tumblr anon may not be the best place to chat through it, so if you ever want to give more detailed feedback semi-anonymously then there's always email ([email protected]) or discord if you have me there.

i also feel like i should point out that there is a back button in the game, and if you are usually okay but one option isn't quite what you thought it would be or you want to see some others, then that's something that can be used to revisit the previous scene and make your choice again.

#technical stuff

[wolffapex]

chapter two — advices

on the most important weekend of his life so far, toto wolff had only person to give him advices: niki lauda.

→ words counting: 2,6k → warnings: none

ABU DHABI, LAST RACE OF THE YEAR

His decision to go to Abu Dhabi days before the official start of the last race weekend of the year had been totally unexpected. He hadn't even thought about that idea, it just came out of his mouth when Scarlett told him that she would travel and spend six months in Australia.

Hearing his wife say that she wasn't ready to take the step forward that he dreamed of so much, had disappointed him because he had given up some things in his life in favor of his relationship with the blonde, so he hoped that she could do that also.

By him.

He loved Scarlett with all his heart but he couldn't imagine the childless future she seemed to want. In reality, he could even imagine himself in that scenario, but all he saw was an unhappy and frustrated Toto Wolff and a happy wife with her own professional career.

The first day in Abu Dhabi, he spent the entirety inside the suite Hanna had selected for him, thinking about his marriage, wondering if it wasn't time for him to think more about his own happiness instead of only wanting Scarlett’s to be happy.

Perhaps, it was time for him to be a little selfish...

But at the same time, he reminded himself of how lonely life was before his wife and being single would only make him grow old far from his desire still.

On the second day in the United Arab Emirates, he decided to focus on his job. The day started with interviews to talk about the end of the season and the possibility of the team's title, participating in other meetings about next year’s car.

When, finally, the first day to go to the paddock arrived, the Austrian was more excited than usual after so many days lost amidst the confusion of his own thoughts about what he would do with his life once he was back at home.

His phone had rung a few times. The device had messages, missed calls and even emails from Scarlett but he didn’t even look at it because he needed to think about what to do.

He couldn't blame Scarlett for not being ready, for wanting a career, but he couldn't give up feeling complete either. He was in a corner at the moment and only one thing would help him out of that situation, maybe clear his mind.

That thing was alcohol.

— Whiskey at ten in the morning? — the voice made him jump as he filled the glass with the woody liquid, pouring a little over the tray the glass was on top of, cursing low in his native language.

— Die Scheiße!

— I understand that, Wolff. — Lauda muttered amusedly, closing the room door behind him before walking towards one of the armchairs.

— Of course, you understand. — he shrugged, not caring much about the comment and raised the glass to her mouth to finish the double content he had poured at once, feeling the alcohol burn her throat.

— I'm going to repeat the question because I want an answer. — Niki muttered, tapping his fingers on armrest. — Whiskey at ten in the morning?

— Trouble, Niki. — he sighed, returning the glass to the tray as he debated whether or not to add another double shot, before repeating. — Trouble.

— Are things difficult between Lewis and Nico again?

The question confirmed for Wolff that he should fill another dose because that was another problem that only alcohol would be able to clear his mind to solve it, which made Lauda irritated.

— Could you stop drinking your face and answer me?! — he mellowed, in his Niki Lauda way, in an irritated tone. — Arschloch!

— I have problems in my marriage, Lauda. — he told, finally, turning his body to face the other. — It's nothing to do with Mercedes, don't worry.

— What's the matter, Wolff? — he crossed his arms, settling himself on the armchair, rolling his eyes when he saw the man drink another glass of whiskey. — Stop drinking!

— The only chance I'm going to get through my thoughts is to get drunk. — he muttered in response, shrugging. — Since when did you become a love counselor or therapist?

— Since when you get drunk at ten in the morning.

— Fair. — Toto laughed, raising his glass and shrugging. — But I don't think you're the best adviser...

— I may not be the best, but I'm what you have now and I'm on my second marriage. — Niki shrugged. – Tell me what’s going on, Wolff!

— Scarlett has been selected to participate in research of a new class of insects in Australia for the next six months.

— I'm still amazed at how she manages to like these crap... — he said, laughing weakly. — The problem is that she will be away from you for a while?

— The problem is that she made it clear that she doesn't want to have children.

— And you want? — a weak laugh escaped the Austrian's lips as he left the glass on the tray once more, turning his body to face his colleague.

— It's what I dream. — the smile that appeared on his lips when he answered, together with the twinkle in his eyes, made the older Austrian understand the problem perfectly, shaking his head slowly.

— Children are a gift but they can be a pain sometimes. — he laughed. — I have four, at different ages, to be able to speak with propriety on the subject.

— Put yourself on my shoes, Niki.

— In what sense?

— What would you do if Marlene or Birgit didn't want to have children and that was your biggest dream?

Niki stopped to think for a moment because both his first wife, Marlene, and the current one, Birgit, shared with him the desire to have a family and he had fulfilled it with Mathias, Lukas, Max and Mia. Which had never made him think about what he’d do if they didn't have the same desire as his, but there was one piece of advice that he knew could be enough for his colleague.

— I don't know exactly what I would do in this situation, but what I can tell you, Toto, is that I wouldn't deny myself the chance to be happy.

Toto blinked a few times as the phrase seemed to repeat itself in his head because it resembled what he was going through his mind but, at the same time, it made his heart ache because he loved Scarlett and he didn't know if he would be happy enough away from his dream — or, even, if he would find a woman who shared the future he wanted.

— Good morning, Toto. Good morning, Niki. — he woke up from his own thoughts when he found Bradley standing inside the room with a slight smile on his face. — Jim Ratcliffe arrived with his family.

— Who is that? — Niki questioned, turning the attention of the head of the team to the advisor, hearing a weak laugh from the newcomer to the room due to his curiosity.

— He is the owner of Ineos. — Toto replied, sighing and running one hand through his hair, trying to clear his mind because he needed to focus on his work, after all, it was the most important weekend of the year. — We’re flattering over him to get a bigger endorsement deal.

— The flattery is to bring you to Abu Dhabi?

— The guy is crazy about Formula 1.

— I hope you can get him to extend the sponsorship. — Niki murmured, getting up from the armchair and turning to Lord. — By the way, Bradley, congratulations! I hear that she is a beautiful girl!

— Thank you, Niki! — the Englishman smiled, looking for his phone inside of his pocket so he could show his daughter's first records, happily talking about the first moments with her, making the Austrian remember the moment of his children's birth.

On the other hand, Toto could feel his heart tightening with that topic and he wanted to sigh because it seemed that everyone around him achieved the goal he wanted so much, but which seemed so far from his life.

Upon seeing the photo Bradley showed of a baby with her face still swollen, asleep and with a pink cap on her head, he smiled so widely that his cheeks hurt and his eyes watered as the aide talked about the feeling of being a father, with Niki commenting as well.

Lauda was a tough business man but Toto knew he was incredibly passionate about his children and always moved when talking about them, especially the youngest, Max and Mia. It was as if the twins had a superpower that made the former pilot extremely vulnerable to all the emotions he always liked to hide.

— She's beautiful, Bradley. — he commented after long minutes in silence, trying to hide the feeling of envy present in his body, and saw the wide smile on the other's face, returning to staring at the photo for a few more seconds before locking the cell phone screen to put the device away.

— She certainly took after his mother. — Niki joked. — I'll talk to Lewis before the session.

— Let me get my cell phone. — the Austrian warned, running towards the table itself to be get his device. — Did you talk with Jim?

— No. — he shook his head. — Hanna told me he'd arrived with his family and she directed him to hospitality so they could get comfortable there.

— We could call Nico to talk to them too... — the boss muttered, putting the Black Berry in his pants pocket and following the assistant out of the room. – Giving them some autographed team items would be nice too.

— I’ve talked to Daniele from marketing and she will help us with this part. — the Englishman smiled because that question was already resolved.

As he dealt practically every weekend with different guests in the hospitality team, he already had a good idea of how to please them and everything was always very well underway before people actually arrived for the weekend.

Toto just nodded because he trusted Mercedes' head of communications faithfully. Bradley was extremely competent and knew exactly what he was doing, especially when it came to welcoming important guests to the team.

All he, as head of the team, needed to do was use his good conversation, be cordial and welcoming to finish the achievement that the trip, all access badges and gifts were already going to start. So, he would have on his desk, probably long before the weekend was over, an extensive sponsorship deal, just the way he wanted it and good enough for Mercedes.

Double win.

The Austrian greeted the employees who were on the first floor of hospitality, nodding and smiling at everyone, putting a smile on his face when he saw Jim Ratcliffe sitting at one of the Mercedes cafeteria tables with a woman who appeared to be the same age as his, who Toto thought was Pilar, his wife, and a younger man sitting opposite the woman, his attention focused on his phone, presumably the couple's son.

— Jim! — the Austrian said in a louder tone to be able to attract the attention of the guests, opening his arm enough to be able to show a certain excitement for welcoming him there. — It is a pleasure to welcome you here!

The Englishman smiled, greeted the team principal with a quick hug, as if they were old friends, noticing that his wife and son had also risen from their seats.

— Toto, it's good to see you again. — he smiled. — Let me introduce myself... This is my wife, Pilar, and our son, Samuel.

— It is a pleasure to meet you, Pilar and Samuel. — he smiled, stretching out his hand so he could greet the woman first, followed by the youngest who looked extremely excited.

— We appreciate the invitation, Toto. — Pilar smiled delicately, placing a hand on her son's shoulder. — Especially those two big fans.

— Jim told me, when he was in Brackley, about his passion for Formula 1… I thought there would be nothing better than to invite you to watch here, where the magic happens.

— Really, I think it doesn't get any better than this. — Samuel murmured, smiling weakly. — It’s the final race and you will be world champions.

— Which makes the whole experience amazing. — Jim muttered, making the Austrian nod his head, even though he was trying to dribble the nervousness and anxiety he was feeling for that weekend.

He wanted to try to focus only on his work, believing that the team still needed to get a lot right in order to be considered the champion. After all, although the title was right, he wasn't a fan of celebrating earlier. He celebrated when things happened — and he knew how to celebrate.

— Too bad Angel missed her flight. — Pilar murmured, shaking her head, attracting the Austrian's attention, making him remember that Jim had said he had two children and that the woman, despite not understanding how pilots submitted to the sport, liked it. to watch it.

— You know very well that Angel can't be counted on for appointments. — Sam murmured, shrugging his shoulders, and Wolff pursed his lips, keeping an eye on the conversation. — Especially when there is a party the day before.

— She’s not coming? — he wanted to know, curious, and saw the older shake his head.

— She will take a flight this afternoon to be able to be here tomorrow. — he replied, smiling. — We are going to extend our stay in Abu Dhabi for a few more days.

— That’s good. —he smiled. — We’re having a party after the race.

— This will make my sister support the team more than ever. — Samuel murmured, making his parents and Toto laugh.

For the Austrian, it seemed that Angel was a young woman without commitment to things, since it was clear that she had missed her flight because of a party the night before, but for the family, perhaps because they were more used to her, that didn't seem to be a problem.

Wolff took the opportunity to glance at the watch on his wrist, noticing that it was approaching time for the session to begin, and turned to look for Bradley, motioning for him to approach.

— As it is almost time for the qualifying session, Bradley will accompany you to the garage so that you can watch our work. — he smiled, placing a hand on the aide's shoulder. — Or, if you prefer, you can stay in our hospitality too, which is more is comfortable.

— I'd rather stay. — Pilar smiled weakly. — You can go to the garage, but I'll watch from here.

— Hanna can accompany you to hospitality. — Bradley smiled, calling Toto's assistant so that he could do that function for the guest, accompanying her so that she felt comfortable enough.

— Jim, shall we talk after the session?

— Of course, Toto!

He smiled before biding goodbye to the two so he could head to the team's garage through hospitality while Bradley would lead them the other way.

The qualifying marked the official start of the weekend for Toto. It was the moment when the clock started ticking in earnest and what could help set the race the next day.

It was the start of the most important weekend of his life so far, and he would love to leave Abu Dhabi on Monday as world champions. There was a lot at stake and, at that moment, his mind, body and soul were only focused on the Mercedes AMG Petronas F1 Team.

It was only the Mercedes that mattered.

#toto wolff #toto wolff x oc #formula one x oc #formula one fanfic #toto wolff fic #wd #formula one

[batmansymbol]

I am currently open for freelance editing projects :)

Hey y’all! If anyone needs an editor, I have bandwidth right now and have opened back up for editing work. I’m down for anything, “anything” defined here as:

Developmental edits. This includes some manuscript comments, but largely focuses on a comprehensive edit letter comprising notes on plot, character, style, voice, and theme.

Line edits. Feeling good about the bones of your story, but worried that you’re bogged down by inefficient language, indistinct dialogue, or the odd wandering character arc? The line edit may be for you.

Copyedits. Grammar, usage, spelling, etc. Every nit picked. Fair warning: I don’t use a style guide, because I find that imposing e.g. the Chicago Manual of Style on fiction messes with things like “voice” and “fun.” My emphasis will fall on clarity, and on tone: does it feel right?

Query letter edits. Pitches are hell, but weirdly, I love them. Rate: $35 flat fee for a query, $50 for a synopsis. $10 for each revision pass thereafter (I will, of course, not charge you if my response to a revision is “This slaps!”).

Essay, article, or cover letter proofing. For ethical reasons I won’t review academic material, and for national security reasons I won't review classified CIA documents :( Rate: $15 flat fee, plus 2¢/word.

I don't do authenticity editing on its own, because it makes me feel weird. That said, if you happen to have a protagonist who’s bi or pan or Chinese-American or multiracial and you’re like, “Oh no, have I messed this up horribly,” feel free to request that I take a look from that angle. Same for characters with depression, anxiety, or relatively mild ADHD.

Also: I have no reading triggers or content aversions. I'm fine with any kind of material, disturbing, upsetting, or very very sexy though it may be.

My rates for fiction editing vary based on project length and status. With something under 10k words, I feel relatively comfortable ballparking around 2¢/word for developmental/line and 1.5¢/word for copyediting, but beyond that, I’d want to test-edit a sample. Occasionally I’ll swap to an hourly rate thereafter, because what if you send over the next Hunger Games, and I tear through it in three hours, but at 2¢/word it’s supposed to cost $1,600? Ridiculous. I hate editing rates.

You can message me here on tumblr or email me directly at [email protected] if you’d like to hire me. If you have a question, don't be shy about reaching out to ask. I am not a salesperson and will never try to hard-sell you.

If you know anybody looking for an editor, please do pass them this post! On this hellsite I know I am just another weirdo, but in real life, I have the qualifications to provide writers with high-quality editing backed up by years of experience in the publishing industry. Per The Official Bio:

Let’s take your fiction to the next level!

I'm the author of four novels: Alone Out Here, published by Disney-Hyperion; and Seven Ways We Lie, Noteworthy, and Final Draft, published by Abrams Books. My books have been published on four continents, optioned for film and TV, given seven starred reviews from critics, and named to Best-of-the-Year lists by Kirkus Reviews, Booklist, and the New York Public Library. Besides editing my own fiction, I've also done editorial work for authors whose books are published at Scholastic, HarperCollins, Penguin Random House, and more.

As an editor, I dive in with an underlying enthusiasm for every project. I'm not interested in trying to alter others' work to my tastes, but in recognizing what story a writer wants to tell and helping them reach that destination, whether with a developmental edit or a final polish. I'm happy to edit works of any length and genre, though my specialty is in fiction, and particularly in children's and YA fiction.

Reblogs would be greatly, greatly appreciated! xo

Riley

#editing #the post is back and more comprehensive now! #maybe i should. idk. set up a page on my website for this or something #writing

[compo67]

Based on one of the options on the fic writer meme...I wonder...what kind of comments do you NOT like to receive? I ask because I'm always paranoid that the comments I leave are either annoying or not good enough. The more I love a fic the less I know what to say sometimes, and sometimes I ramble too much and I worry the author is rolling their eyes when they read it, or judging me for taking so long to get to the point. I want my fave authors to like me, but I'm such a dork!

Hellooo anon!

Right off the bat--you're not a dork! Trust me, by leaving a comment your author automatically likes you, whether that comment is a word or an essay. We live for the feedback, we want to know what y'all think, and we crave that AO3 email notification.

I'm always super appreciative of constructive feedback and nudges. Like I'll never forget this one user who nudged me in the direction of active voice. Am I perfect at it? No, but I'm definitely much better than I used to be. I also love long comments where folks point out specific lines they liked or will remember.

The comments I don't like to receive are ones negative in tone or backhanded compliments. Thankfully, they don't happen much. I also don't care for people telling me they can't read a fic before they've even given it a chance. Why tell me this?? Just move on. If you don't want to read it, don't tell the author that. (This is super different than someone telling me midway through a fic that they can't continue. I still thank them for letting me know that they tried.)

So. To me, there's no such thing as rambling. I would never roll my eyes and I doubt any other author would when we get those wonderful AO3 notifications. Ultimately, you do you. Wanna write me an essay about how much you enjoyed something? Go for it and have my eternal gratitude! Wanna write "awesome!" and that's it? My friend, you have still made my day. :D

What I wanna ask though, is do you like when the author replies back? I try to answer all the comments I can, even if it's with a simple "Thank you!" But I'm never sure that's necessary or wanted? What do you think, anon? Do you have a preference for authors replying to comments? I'm curious to know.

Thank you for this ask, anon. Go out there and be not afraid--all your favorite authors love you for the time you took out of your day to read our work and go the extra mile to tell us you enjoyed it. <3

-Cal

#cal answers #long post

[mashkaroom]

literally why is apparently the entirety of the MRI scheduling dept at beth israel run by one woman who is evidently only available for half an hour in the early morning? why do you not just have a portal? why are you throwing shade at ME for the fact that it’s taking a long time to schedule an MRI? “please schedule asap and adjust your schedule, it’s very difficult to schedule an MRI” yeah lmao, i fucking noticed. it’s because you guys do it by having aforementioned one lady call at an undisclosed time. i am not always available to come to the phone! what is this assumption!

#i had already had one scheduled but there was a change in plans and i couldn't do it that day #it took like 2 fucking weeks because this lady calls only at like 8 in the morning during which time i am asleep #i genuinely don't understand why they can't have a portal to schedule this. why does it have to be difficult to schedule #also i feel like they are lowkey being mean about this. i'm not upset it's just annoying as fuck #the doctor is a personal friend of my aunt's and very good in his field and saw me on very short notice so i am grateful for that #but he's also. honestly very annoying. #he was not able to reach me at the first call and so texted my aunt to tell her to tell me to check my voicemail #boy just email me! #this whole system is not only a hassle for the patients and has major accessibility issues #it also seems like it creates way more work for the employees #portal would be best but email would already be easier #or at least have there be a choice #i was honestly ready to give up on this bc the problem in question had dissipated and the schedule process is just. so much #but we have money left in the fsa that will expire soon so #better now than next year probably? #also email etiquette for doctors is so fucking stressful #this really is a part of medicine that should be fully automated #i don't want to have to feel like an asshole for rescheduling bc it has to go through an individual person #and i don't want to have to worry about whether my tone in an email containing 1 item of information is rude #fucking abolish email ettiquette #i keep being hugely frustrated by the most pointless things #like at least in high school the things that i was annoyed about i was also righteously angry about #i guess i would rather these things be low-stakes but also #i handle annoyance so poorly #and there's nothing i can do about any of this bc it's fully pointless and arbitrary #no man or machine to rail against just. a bunch of pointless habits and customs which grate on me #i will drink some calming tea. everything that is annoying to me now will be resolved soon. nothing is long-term. #i will roll my boulder up the hill and imagine myself happy #who needs therapy when you have Talking about albert camus's the myth of sysiphus in tumblr tags

[izabelleae]

What you can do to improve communication?

Did you ever feel misunderstood? Has anyone ever looked at you and nodded their heads, but in reality understood nothing you said? Even worse, don't look you in the eye.They look at their phones or other devices instead of their eyes. I don't know about you, but this situation has already gotten to where I am stopping and breathing deeply. Having experienced it myself, I completely understand how you feel. Until I learned how to communicate effectively, I was in the middle of a conversation and my friends asked me to stop. They did not laugh at my jokes, and in the end, no one really cared what I had to say. I kept quiet until I learned to listen to others, but I didn't stop there since I am here today to share with you the best strategies for communicating better. If you recognize yourself in this situation or one that is not specified but similar, you have come to the right place. You should keep reading this blog because it's the perfect one for you.

What is the point of knowing how to communicate well?

Even if you know the different reasons well, it is still beneficial to discuss them briefly.

Every individual's life revolves around communication. Is there someone you'd like to share your emotions with? Interested in someone and want him or her to know about your feelings? How about telling a friend you like them? See! It is impossible to use any of these options if you lack the knowledge. Communication whether it is oral, such as talking, laughing, writing, or even the tone, posture, must be well mastered to convey messages effectively, to make people understand, to make people feel, to make them react. A convincing message is essential if you hope to convince anyone, land a job, get funding or sell something. That is why it is such an important factor in your success.

You can find out more by clicking here

We will now get to the point without delay

Listening

Even before we begin to talk about listening, I want to say how important it is to know your audience and your objective. Prior to any writing, you need to ask yourself these 2 fundamental questions. Any text you write will depend on your answers to them, so make sure to ask them before getting started.

To have effective communication, you need to learn to listen first. In other words, you need to pay attention to what he or she is saying. Above all, don't think about your answer before you've listened to your partner.

I recently learned a technique in an online business communication course at Edex. Additionally, I think I have learned quite a bit from this course as it has been helpful to me in regards to communication, especially now that I can share my knowledge with others so they can be able to help and also encourage them to take the course.

Active listening can be remembered using this technique.

SOLER

It stands for.

Squarely face your audience.

Maintain an open posture--

no folding your arms here.

Lean toward the speaker.

Keep eye contact.

and Relax.

Ensure clarity

Being clear when we communicate eliminates the need to ask you to resume all the time if there is a misunderstanding. If you want the story told without reiteration, this is crucial. Communication is not only about us, so we must take steps to improve this aspect of it

Using body language

Personally, I would never be interested in someone who keeps their eyes glued to their cell phone or elsewhere, and I am sure you feel the same way. It is for this reason that body language is so important. Communicate openly. Look the person in the eye and open your arms, shake your head a little to show that you understand, and ask questions to show that you care about them.

Energy

You should be energetic with what you say or do to interact with your partner so that he or she feels connected, stays connected, and is interested in certain instances, since this does not work in every situation. And last but not least

Confidence

Nobody will trust you or believe what you say if you aren't confident in yourself. You must earn your audience's trust to make an impact

NB: If you want results, you need to act

The list isn't complete, but don't worry, I mention it on my page from time to time. It's now up to you to put these techniques into action in any situation. Thanks for allowing me to share my knowledge with you. I look forward to seeing you soon for another topic on...

Take care of yourself!

Izabelle Joassaint

Hello, I am Izabelle. My personal leadership is to help people become the best version of themselves. I enjoy writing articles in order to help others, and I do so from the heart. What I even more appreciate is the fact that you read my articles, as well as your membership in this wonderful and inspiring community. Apart from that, I enjoy reading and cultivating myself because I believe that success comes down to the daily actions we take! Feel free to contact me via this email at any time

#@motivationsforlife #writing prompt #quoteoftheday #positivity #positivemindset #positiveattitude #blogger #do it yourself

[artificialqueens]

Gimme Love, 8/9 (Miz Cracker/Blair St Clair) - Grinder

AN: Oof! After this part, we have one more chapter. Things start to look a little bit better for Brie in this part of the story. Not completely, but she's getting there. Enjoy!

TW for this chapter: mental health mentions

2020

A week later, still no change on the Ed Sheeran thing. Launch day was just around the corner, and my nerves were wrecked. And Jujubee still hadn't spoken a word to me.

It was only morning time, and I hadn't even been awake for 5 minutes. Already so many things were playing in my mind.

I still hadn't reinstalled Messenger. So I had no idea whether Blair had replied or not. I really wanted to just forget about her already, but it was slow. I probably should have applied for counselling sessions with HR. I hired a lady a few years prior named Dela, and apparently, she was brilliant.

But therapy could wait until after the launch.

I had seen Jujubee at work a few more times, either making eye contact and looking away just as quick or trying to say hello at least. She'd just brush by.

I tried texting her but never received a reply. As much as she had pissed me off, I missed her. A lot.

"Hey, this is Jujubee. Leave a message."

Beep.

"Hey, Juju, it's me." I paused, struggling to figure out where to go from there, "Look, I...I know things are bad between you and me. But I...I don't want to lose you."

I couldn't think of what else to say.

'Please, talk to me?'

'You mean a lot to me.'

My silence was going on too long. "I...hope to see you at the prelaunch party...OK. Bye"

I hung up, burying my face in my pillow, feeling very pathetic. And because I was impatient, I thought to try reinstalling Messenger and try there.

Or was that too much? And did I really want to risk seeing a reply from a certain someone?

...Fuck it, I was doing it. I'd just ignore her. Yeah, I'd do that.

Blair: Wow. I didn't think…

I never clicked a message quicker. I sat up with my back against the headboard, eyes already reading the message.

Blair: Wow. I didn't think you'd actually reply! For sure, girl, we need to hang out! I'm in New York for two weeks anyway. Perfect timing, right? Give me a call as soon as you get this. TTYL.

"Oh my God." I let the phone slip into my lap. How was this real? How the fuck hadn't she found that message creepy? Were things starting to look up? I couldn't just leave her on read. It was sent last week, meaning she was still in New York.

Good. This was good.

But still, why didn't she address the confession to my feelings? Why was she avoiding the subject?

Sorry, you have to hear my innermost thoughts, all these questions. It just goes to show the whirlwind my head was experiencing.

Make a move, Brie.

My thumb hovered over the phone icon in the upper right corner. Do I just...do it?

Yes.

I clicked the button. It rang for a few seconds, the nerves telling me to just give up.

"Hello?"

Why the fuck do the people on the other end always say 'hello' like they didn't see who is calling them?

Why was I even thinking that?? Focus, Brie.

"Hi," I said.

"Wow, I didn't think you'd call." She sounded surprised.

"I'm sorry I keep doing this," I said too quickly. "Anyway, yes. Let's hang out."

There was a moment of silence, and I realised how panicked I sounded.

"Brianna, are you OK?" I heard the concern.

"What? Yeah! Of course, I am." I cleared my throat, "Just a bit...stressed out. Trying to...deal with this launch thingie and...deal with Ed Sheeran, I don't know," I laughed nervously before almost slapping some sense into myself, "I'm not majorly stressed out, though. I can still hang out."

She laughed. And fuck I realised just how much I missed it.

"You always made me laugh. You wanna grab a coffee?"

"Yeah, sure."

"Great! When are you free? I would say today, but I'm stuck with this thingie…" She replied.

And a thought hit me. "Actually... there's gonna be a party for my thing. It's for that project I told you about...back on Prom night, I don't know if you remember."

"Of course I do, Brie. I've been following all the media coverage. It's pretty awesome."

"You have been?" I sounded a little too excited and then reminded myself to not sound too desperate, "I mean, that's pretty cool. But yeah, there's a party the night before the launch. I could add you to the list."

"Yeah, of course! I'd love to come."

"Fantastic. I'll send you the details."

"Well, I'll leave you to it then."

"Thanks."

"I can't wait."

"Me too."

"Bye, Brianna."

"Bye, Blair."

She did the awkward half-spoken "bye, bye, bye," and hung up.

I threw my phone down onto my duvet and puffed out a breath of air.

"Yes!" I punched the air, "Yes. Fucking yes."

Shit was definitely looking up.

I found myself loading up my emails. "Dear Ed Sheeran, I appreciate your enthusiasm about participating in our project. However, after some thinking, we would love for you to perform at the event instead. This is strictly for your safety and the safety of everyone else. Sorry for the inconvenience. Kindest regards, Brianna Caldwell and team."

Sent. Easier than I thought.

No matter what the reply would be, I felt strong. Two problems down in less than ten minutes.

All that was left was Jujubee and Mom.

Fuck...the Mom problem.

It wasn't that I didn't love her. I adored the woman with all my heart. But I was still afraid of that recurring conversation, the memories of how I was a problem child. And if it wasn't that, it was my Grandpa.

Funny how those were always the recurring topics, things I didn't want to address. And now, on top of things, we were going to have to talk about Piggie's health.

I sent her money for his medical bills, so maybe things were different for him.

But still, the other topics of conversation I just wish we could avoid…If only there was something else to talk about...

Wait.

I stared at my phone and instantly became very still.

There was one subject that had gone unaddressed for so long - too long. Oh, God.

Half an hour later, I was in the kitchen, shaky hands pouring a cup of coffee. I couldn't call Mom immediately. I needed to will myself, build up my willpower.

After two cups, I found Mom's name in my phone book, hesitated to hit call but forced myself.

I breathed deeply, taking a seat at the breakfast counter and put the phone to my ear.

Ring...Ring...Ring...Ring…

She answered but was silent.

"Mom?" I spoke.

"Hey, honey." She sounded deflated.

"Did you get the money?" That was all I could think of to start with.

"Yeah. It's actually really helped. He's already showing improvement." She paused. "Thanks, baby."

It was painful how thankful she sounded, yet so miserable.

"Mom, I'm gonna come see you," I confirmed.

"Really?"

"Yeah." I smiled upon hearing how she lightened up. "I'm sorry about last week. My phone just...cut off, I guess."

I heard a sniff before she spoke again, "It's OK. When are you coming around?"

"Well, I got the launch this week, so maybe not now. How about 2 weeks?"

"Yeah, that's perfect. I have a job interview to prepare for anyway. I applied to this new boutique that opened in town. My interview is next week."

"That's great!" I was actually excited for her. Things weren't just looking up for me, it seemed. "I'm really happy for you."

"Yeah, me too. I'm not even nervous. Just ready to start working again. Anyway, how about you?"

"Actually, Mom…" I paused, squeezing my hand into a tight fist.

"What's wrong, Brianna?" She lowered her tone.

How did she know? I didn't even sound sad. Mothers intuition? Because I always thought that was bullshit. Like, if I was a Mom, I'd be the worst in picking up on things.

"You there?" Mom asked.

"Yeah, I just…" I licked my lips and swallowed. "Mom. Why was I adopted?" I sighed. "Why did they give me up, Mom?"

She was silent for a moment. I could practically feel how she turned cold. "It's time, isn't it?"

I nodded, not that she would see, "Yeah. I...I need to know."

"OK...How about we talk about that when you come here?" She asked.

"No. I...wanna know. I need to know." My voice cracked. "Or I won't be able to move on."

She's silent again…just for a moment. And I felt like I crossed a line.

But she spoke. I hadn't crossed any line.

"OK...Brianna? I just want you to know that I love you, and I always will. No matter what, I'll never stop loving you." Her own voice was cracking now. "When you came into my life, I never realised I could be so happy, how I felt when I met you. You were this...little light that brightened the dark...a reminder that life wasn't so bad. And I promised I'd give you the best life. I'd be the best parent you'd ever have." She paused again. And I knew she was crying. "Brie, it wasn't that your parents didn't want you. I'm sure they knew that they would have been the luckiest parents in the world." She was crying. "Brie. They...they went for a drive one night. And it was raining really bad. And they…"

She was silent. But I nodded slowly, my eyes just staring at the counter, glassy with tears. "I-I understand."

"I'm sorry, baby." She whimpered. "I should have told you this years ago. I...I didn't know it would affect you for this long. I'm such an idiot."

I held my forehead in my hand. "No. No, Mom. You're not. You had no idea." I sniffed.

"I know. I know. But I just...I...How do you tell a child something like that?"

"Don't worry about that, you idiot. I know now." One of the tears finally slid down my cheek. "I love you, Mom."

"I love you too, Brianna."

I smiled, wiping the tear away. And then a quiet laugh escaped. "OK, I can't lie. I don't wanna leave you like this right now. Let's talk some shit or something."

She laughed in return. "God, you and your potty mouth."

#rpdr fanfiction #s10 #as5 #miz cracker #jujubee #blair st clair #blair x cracker #coming of age #hurt/comfort #lesbian au #high school au #angst #gimme love #grinder #tw mental health mentions

[konpithepuppy]

[TRANSLATION: POTATO 05.2021]

7 MEN SAMURAI SOLO INTERVIEW

Scans not mine

Neither an English nor a Japanese native speaker

Feel free to correct me, thanks

LOVE AT FIRST SIGHT

A gravure of 6 people who gives off a wonderful aura that seems like will make you fall in love the moment your eyes meet. In the interview, the members's value towards "love at first sight" is highlighted. (The interview was done at the middle of March.)

Questions:

Q1. Does love at first sight exist?

Q2. What specific first impression of a girl has a good impression on you?

Q3. What is the item that you fell in love at first sight and bought it?

Konno Taiki

A1. It is relatively possible (LOL).

But, not just based on the appearance, I may also be attracted to her inner side. I think I will find her cute when I try talking to her and will find out that she is an honest and airheaded girl. Basically, since I want for the move to come from me (T/N: lit. push myself harder), so on the contrary, I don't like to be told, "I fell in love with you at first sight." Without suddenly asking her contact address, I want to do things step by step (LOL). And then, when I also think that it is okay on her side (T/N: lit. she's good), I want to confess to her finally.

A2. Since I like someone who is an airhead, I can recognize if the person is an airhead or not on the first meeting. Since there is something that impresses only me (LOL). Being too much of an airhead is a problem but I like someone who is an airhead to an extent that I can tease. When she said something wrong, I want to pester her saying, "Can you try saying it again?" (LOL).

A3. I like a lot the black bomber jacket that I bought last year. I like the color black, and I came to like simple styles too. I first saw it in the internet but I am the type who buys things that I have seen in actual so I went to see it at the actual store and bought it there.

Recent Happening

I want to go and buy spring clothes but I refrain from going out too much so I can't go and buy...An email from the brand that I like came saying, "Our new collection is out" and I desperately want those (LOL). I buy sweater and parka every year but this year I am greatly troubled [whether to go out and buy or not]!

Nakamura Reia

A1. It totally exists! Since the personality shows on the face, if I like the face then I will like the personality too I think. I think the type of person I will like depends on the situation I am in at that moment. Like, I think a person who seems kind when I am tired is nice, and I will be attracted to a person who looks like I can have fun with when I am in high-spirit. But, on the contrary, I might get turned off at the person who falls in love at me at first sight.

Since I am putting a fake face in front of a person who I am meeting for the first time (LOL). It is not the first impression but I feel really being liked when the person responses back to me as an answer to my approach.

A2. More than being fixed with clothes that are in trend, I like better a person who shows "I like this!" with her clothes and small accessories. I want her to be a nerd of something. We will be excited together if we have the same hobby, and if we have different hobbies, I want her to teach me her hobby. For example, I am an indoor type but if she likes fishing, I want for us to try doing it together.

A3. A black setup with a dragon embroidery on it. It is very stern (LOL), but the material is very soft and it feels good wearing it, and I don't have to think of a coordinate so it is easy to wear. I often wear it to the filming site of 「Gekikaradou」.

Recent Happening

I bought a Pachira and started to raise it. Honestly, I wanted an animal but plants are cute too! I usually place it at the entranceway. But I sometimes bring it next to the window so it well get some sunlight.

Yabana Rei

A1.There is. It's just that I am shy of strangers so it takes time for me to make some move. I will consult for roughly a year (LOL).Or perhaps I should say, as long as there's no proof that I can make a move, it may take forever for me to make a move. If it will strangely destroy our relationship then it is better to just stay as friends. Even if a girl falls in love with me at first sight and approached me, I am thickheaded so I will probably not be able to notice it. I will not know if I will not be clearly told, "I like you."

A2. A person who can behave. For example, I like someone who stays silent in a quiet establishment, or someone who can read the room. Also, I think I will be happy with someone who has the same hobby as mine. Like we happen to like the same genre in music. My tension will rise the most with a person who likes cars.

A3. I don't think I am the type who buys impulsively at things that I fall in love at first sight. Even though I falll in love at first sight at something, I'm the type who will think properly about it. The black bass with a drawing of a bird that I bring on stage until now is a bass that I found by chance in an instrument shop. Even though there are other choices, after thinking too much about it, I thought, "The appearance of this one is cool after all," and I went to buy it the next day.

Recent Happening

3 more days and my sticker as a new car driver will be removed! Among the members, Taiko, Konpi (Konno), and Rinne-kun rode already but Taiko and Konpi are substantially banned from riding [my car]. Since they went on a rampage inside the car. They misunderstood a person's car with a jet coaster (LOL).

Motodaka Katsuki

A1. I don't fall in love at first sight but I think 1st impression is important to an extent. I think I will gradually like the person, who I thought is nice during our first meeting, while getting to know her. I am bad at dealing with someone who falls in love with me for the first time! But I am worried that that person will fall in love with another person (LOL). But if that person asked me, "Should we grab for a delicious meal?" I might be lured with food...(LOL). Moreover, I will be like "I know a shop with a delicious taco rice" and it seems like if I was told about something I am a maniac of, I will definitely talk about it.

A2. I am interested with the lips. With natural color, it has a sense of cleanliness, and lips that are not dry is nice. Things like lipsticks with loud colors, I don't like that much those that are shiny. A color that is close to a bare lips has a good impression in me. Wanting to kiss those lips without thinking, lips like that.

A3. I fell in love at a flounder in a fresh fish market and I bought it. Since its body is big, I was thinking that I could fillet it into 5 fillets. I filleted it into 5 fillets immediately at home, and I broiled some in the burner and I also made sushi.

Recent Happening

Abe (Ryohei)-kun gave me a parka from a brand I thought was good before. Before the filming of 「Q-sama!!」, he casually gave it to me saying, "Oh, which reminds me, here." I was really happy but it is super valuable that I can't wear it (LOL).

Sugeta Rinne

A1. I often think, "This person is cute" (LOL). But, I definitely do not tell it out loud! Finally, when I liked her inner side, I might be the type who will advance to being a boyfriend from being a friend. Even if how cute the person is, I don't like those who use words like 「w」

「草」 「sore na」 in mails (LOL). (T/N: w = laugh (LOL), 草 = literally, it means grass but people in the internet use it like "w" which means "laugh (LOL)" because "w" looks like a grass) Conversely, I will be a happy if a person falls in love with me at first sight, but I will completely doubt and ask, "Really?" If I am invited as a friend and gets confessed to, then my suspicions may loosen.

A2. A person who has silky hair, light makeup, and without colored contact lens. To exert a great amount of effort to be pretty is wonderful, but I think I like it better when it is not overly done. I like a neat and tidy person who looks good in white tops and denim pants!

A3. Before, I often fell in love at first sight with clothes, but I have a lot of failed purchases from buying clothes without trying them on. Like, when I bought a black long tee with a lion print on it, it turned out to be a dress for ladies (LOL). What I am currently aiming at is a sneaker with orange print on a white background. Since I haven't tried it on, I plan to buy it after I tried wearing it.

Recent Happening

Since I don't move extremely in the stage play「Hidamari no Ki」, my muscles toned down. My belly is protruding because of gastroptosis, so I was asked "Are you full?" during the dressing of Hakama (LOL). I must go back to training.

Sasaki Taiko

A1. There is. Isn't love in this world is approximately like that? I think there's not much of those who advance from friends to lovers. But since I want to know things about the other party, I want for us to exchange messages for around a month. And then, I want to meet the parents. Since it seems like we can properly date if I know the parents.

A2. A girl with pretty legs. I maybe looking at the legs more than the face. I like those girls who take care of their legs. But that doesn't mean I like girls to wear mini skirt, I am on the pants side. Lately, I think I came to like those pants like flare pants where it is tight in the thigh area.

A3. A large quantity of water from a large supermarket. 500mL of water came in a set of 40 bottles and it was very cheap. Also, I impulsively bought toilet paper. I bought so many that everything can't fit in the house so I gave some to my high school friend (LOL). Since I got my driver's license, I can now go in the supermarket alone and I go there around once a week lately. It feels like, "I've become an adult~." My next aim is the big potato chips!

Recent Happening

In the "Taiko Challenge" in ISLAND TV, when I uploaded a video of putting candy into a carbonated drink, I was surprised that the official account of the candy tweeted about it. Moreover, it is in English. Isn't that amazing? A CM may come after that...it will be my advance to the world. I might really do it! (LOL)

[chris-evans-indian-fanfic]

Across Seven Seas

Chapter 12

Description: This fanfiction series is set in the year 2022, after the horrid COVID-19 has finally come to an end. In this fanfiction, Chris Evans holidays with his family in India and meets Meera Shankar. The story explores their rollercoaster journey and raises a question, whether two people, from two contrasting backgrounds and cultures, can build their future together?

Series Masterlist

Chapter 13

Main Masterlist

This series is Chris Evans x OFC with Chris Evans' family and friends having recurring appearances. Please find below a lot of Original Characters-

Meera Shankar - The female lead

Meera's Mother

Poppy - Meera's maternal grandmother

Rohan - Meera's elder brother who is 6 years older than her.

Ankur - Concierge of the Hotel Maple-Fawn in Mussoorie

Warning: Curse words, beginning of rape, alcohol consumption, angst

This is a work of fiction. The names of the hotels and companies have been changed to avoid copyright issues. Meera Shankar and her family is based on the author and her kin. No offense is intended.

I don’t consent to have any of my work published or featured on any third party app, website or translated. If you are seeing this fanfiction anywhere but tumblr, it has been reposted without my permission. In that case, please do share the link and let me know.

...

Chapter 12

Meera rang the doorbell of the Evans suite. Situated on the top floor of the hotel, the passage way to the suite was lined with ornate arches, marble statues and impeccable sophisticated lighting. The entire decor screamed opulence in capital letters. It also made her feel uncomfortably out of place.

Scott opened the door and let her in. He welcomed her to take a seat in the living room of the suite, along with Lisa, Chris, Shanna and Carly. "Did all of you see the news?" Meera asked as she took a seat, wincing a little. "Yeah we did. We just wanted to ask a few questions. Thank you for coming up here even though you are exhausted. It means a lot," said Scott. 

Meera brushed him off, "It's okay. I will try my best to put your mind at ease." She looked around at their silent faces. They looked a little nervous and Meera soon realised why. She was sitting in her usual position, legs wide apart, back slightly bent, forearms resting on her knees with her palms meeting in the middle. While she felt comfortable in this position, her Mother had always reminded her that women sat with their legs closed and not like mobsters planning to threaten people.

"Umm... Yeah so… I mean…" Scott struggled, clearly hesitant.

Meera chuckled under her breath, "Why don't I start with the obvious questions. You can ask me later on if I miss out on anything." Scott nodded.

"So first of all, why did I not take any credit for the fight? Simple. I wanted to protect my family, especially my brother. He works with a cruise ship in the US and," she sighed, "stuff like this will make it harder for him to renew his visa."

Meera looked at Chris, "You gave your honest statement to the police officer. It was I who translated it and signed the false statement. So… So please be assured, you will not get into any legal trouble." She removed her phone from her bomber jacket, "I have a voice recording of your original statement. I can give it to you right now if you want. So that just in case, in the future, if this matter ever comes to light, you will have proof to back you up."

The 5 looked considerably relieved now. Scott gave her his email ID where she could send the recording. Once she did, she deleted the sent email and his email ID from her contact list in front of them.

"Now for the next question, how and when did I manage to plan all this? I spoke with Inspector Rima when she came to arrest those 3 gentlemen. I explained to her that since you were US citizens, you were planning to file a complaint with your embassy and would see to it that this matter received international coverage. She understood that her police force would be insulted and she would definitely get suspended. So," Meera sighed again, only this time pain visibly flashed across her face, "she agreed to take the credit and include you guys in the report as just tourists."

"From whatever little I know, there were 26 members in the gang and all of them have been caught. So you guys are all safe. Plus, the hotel is…," she groaned a little with pain, "is providing us with increased security. Nobody can enter our respective floors without avoiding the hotel guards. So yes, you can stay here for the remainder of your trip," she ended.

She looked around at them with a small smile, "Any questions?"

"I do," said Shanna slowly, "Why did you not use your knife to fight those guys? I mean they had knives too right? You were lucky only your sweater was torn."

Meera nodded, "I was incredibly lucky today. The fight could have gone sideways very fast. I didn't use the knife because…" she paused again, running fingers on her forehead, "Aah... because it would have further complicated the crime scene. See you can easily explain punches and kicks as self-defence to the police, but when a knife or any other weapon gets involved, it comes close to the murder-territory. I figured if… if I could distract them with my laughter and insults, I could take them on one-by-one." 

She looked at Chris again. He was still wearing her sweater and cap, "That reminds me, can I please have my sweater and skull cap back?"

Chris became tongue-tied. He could feel everyone's attention on him now. Quick! Say something smart! He kept looking at Meera. He knew her body must be paining, but he saw a greater pain in her eyes. Her pink lips were slightly quivering, as if she could cry in an instant. Her eyelids were heavy with sleep. He knew she needed rest, yet here she was, reassuring his family. He wanted to hold her, hug her tight and tell her everything would be okay. But would she let him? He should have protected her today, and instead, he was a coward. Would she ever forgive him for that?

"Umm Mr Evans?" Tell her why can't you return her belongings. SPEAK YOU FUCKING MEATBALL!! His breaths started coming in rapid successions as his eyes grew wider. You are a fucking 41-year-old man, TALK!!! But the more he thought about talking, the more he shut himself. 

"Oh God baby no it's okay," said Lisa, lightly rubbing his hands while Shanna and Carly started fanning him with the newspapers. "Hey do you want to sing the Little Mermaid song?" Scott suggested, kneeling in front of his brother. 

Meera got up, headed to the refrigerator and brought the ice cube tray in front of Chris. "Pop one in your mouth," she suggested in a commanding tone. Chris looked at her, a little confused but still panicking.

"What are you talking abo…" Before Scott could finish his sentence, she said, "Trust me. Pop one ice cube into your brother's mouth."

Raising his eyebrows and shaking his head in disbelief, Scott still did as she instructed. 

The confusion on Chris' face grew, then the cold hit him. "AFHASGHAHAGHHFA," he said with his mouth open, his panic attack now forgotten. He looked at Meera, dancing a little on his feet with the cold ice cube in his mouth. She just nodded, "Yes you can go and spit it out now."

She placed the ice tray back in the refrigerator. 

When Chris came back, she asked him, "Feeling better?" He nodded, managing to say "Thanks" quietly.

"Umm why… and how?" a stunned Carly managed to ask her.

She addressed them, "There are 3 reasons why putting an ice cube in your mouth works while having a panic attack. One," she raised a finger, and immediately winced in pain, "...the idea acts as a distraction. Two, the cold shocks your system and confuses it. And three, I figured... you might not be drinking enough water, which would have caused your mouth to produce more… ummm…," Meera shook her head as if thinking, "more saliva, which would calm you down."

She stood while they took a seat. "Mr Evans," she spoke gently, "I am sorry I caused you to have a panic attack. When I asked for my stuff, I didn't mean immediately right now. You can return it tomorrow," she closed her eyes and gripped the chair as she felt a little dizzy, "I didn't mean for you to shed your clothes in front of me if that's what you thought."

"Oh no no," Chris finally found his voice, "I didn't... I didn't think that. Please take a seat, you are clearly injured. Have you seen a doctor yet?" 

Meera smiled again, "No I haven't. I don't need to. I will be fine. I will take your leave now." 

As she was leaving, the family thanked her once again. Lisa asked her, "Are you sure you want your sweater back? It's been torn quite horribly." 

"Yes," Meera looked even more exhausted now, if that were possible. "I… I come from a family of… of…" she shook her head and again placed a few fingers on her forehead. "Ummm you know those people who… who do repair work… but of clothes… and they sew new clothes as well? What is the word? What are they called? I am sorry I am having a hard time translating things into English now."

"No don't be sorry. Did you mean a tailor?" 

"Yes! Yes a tailor. I come from a family of women tailors. Yes tailors. Thank you. I will stitch it back together," Meera bid goodbye to them, thinking about her bathtub and soft bed longingly.

…

Back in Meera's room, her phone chimed again. Vikranth: 20 missed calls flashed across the screen.

…

Meera collapsed on her bed. She closed her eyes, the pain in her arms and legs increasing with each second. She groaned as her mobile buzzed. Can't I have a minute of peace? Slowly reaching out for the phone, she saw it was Rohan. 

"Are you okay?" he asked on the call.

"Yes. Will order room service and go to sleep."

"What's your room number? Ma is freaking out here," Rohan sounded concerned, "Look she is worried. Don't do this to her."

"If I give her my room number then she will come down here. She will not give me an iota of space or freedom. Tell her I am in the hotel and I am safe. Explain to her all the security measures the hotel is taking. Even after that, if it doesn't help her paranoia then I cannot do anything about it. No, Rohan, YOU please understand," she interrupted her brother, "I am in pain right now. My hands and legs hurt like crazy and I cannot take any medicine. Right now, I just need my space and time to heal. I am in the hotel so she has nothing to worry about. If she still chooses to worry then I cannot help it. Good night," Meera disconnected the call.

…

2am

Meera was back on the road. 6 big, strong men headed towards her as she ran. She knew she couldn't fight all 6 at once. She tried to run fast but couldn't. Her foot got stuck in the uneven road and she fell face-first. She felt multiple hands on her, ripping her clothes apart. Rough hands turned her around, and she saw her rapists as they started devouring her body in front of her family.

She woke up trembling with shock. Her mouth was open in a silent scream as her body was covered with sweat. She felt breathless. It took her a solid minute to realise she was safe in her room. It was just a nightmare, it was just a nightmare, she tried to calm herself down. Switching on the lights, she headed towards the refrigerator, and popped an ice cube in her mouth. She was on her 3rd ice cube when she finally stopped trembling. 

Reaching for her phone, she decided to watch anything to divert her mind. That's when she noticed the multiple missed calls and messages. She clicked on the notifications and saw her Mother's messages first.

I gave you my life and this is how you repay me?

I have done everything for you! Cared for you, cleaned, cooked, drove you around, was with you every step of the way and you left me all alone? No mother deserves this.

You should be ashamed of what you have done. 

No parent should have a daughter like you. 

Look at how your brother is supporting us in these times of crisis. And you did nothing. You didn't even ask Vikranth for help because of your ego.

You don't deserve to have anybody in your life.

I am extremely disappointed in you.

Wow, Meera thought as she held her head in her hands. She tried to cry, but maybe her body was still in shock, because no tears came to her eyes. 

Nodding her head, she hugged herself and kept repeating, Okay, okay we will get through this. We are okay. We just need to freak out and cry right now. Okay, okay. Freak out and cry. We need to leave this room now. Okay.

…

Chris couldn't sleep. It was all just too much for him to process. The light snores of his brother filled the room. They had all decided to sleep in the suite after the day's events. He couldn't even think straight, let alone sleep. Deciding he needed a drink, he quietly crept out of his bed, taking the room key with him.

He headed towards the hotel's 24x7 bar, hoping to find it deserted. As soon as he entered, he saw the bar was empty, except for one chair in the corner. He couldn't see the person except for a corner of their shawl hanging from the side of the large armchair. The person was playing soft music on their phone. Chris approached the bartender, noticing the shocked and… almost repulsive look on his face as the bartender kept looking at the person in the corner. 3 bottles of different soft drinks were open in front of him but he only focused on the person, his mouth slightly open.

"Ahem," Chris slightly coughed, drawing the attention of the bartender towards him. As Chris asked for a whisky on the rocks, he swore he heard the bartender murmur "Thank God." 

He turned to look at the figure in the corner. While he still couldn't see them, he saw their reflection in the floor-to-ceiling glass window. He saw Meera.

He glanced at his drink on the counter debating whether to approach her or not. He couldn't afford to have another panic attack in front of her. He had to be strong. He took two large gulps of the strong whisky, immediately regretting his action. As he coughed and sputtered, he asked for a refill. 

He felt his throat and chest burn, somewhat fuelling his courage. Taking his drink, he approached her. 

As Chris neared Meera, he heard the melodious song more clearly. Even though it was in Hindi, he understood the sad tune. He saw her tear-stained cheeks and stopped. There wasn't another chair besides her where he could sit and comfort her.

Maybe she needs to feel the pain. I should just leave her alone. She might not like me interrupting her… Chris thought, but he couldn't help himself. Taking another step towards her, he gingerly asked, "Meera?"

She turned her head to look at him. Squinting her eyes, she was still unable to see the person. Putting on her glasses, she spoke through tears, "Mr Evans?" her red eyes registering slight surprise. 

"Do you want to talk about it? What can I do to help you?" 

Meera wiped her nose with a tissue, "Please leave me alone Mr Evans. I just want to be alone," she begged. 

Chris nodded, but still stood in his spot. He looked around and decided to bring another comfortable armchair near Meera's.

He dragged it and placed it right besides the sidetable where her phone and glasses were kept. 

Meera looked at him in disbelief, "Mr Evans I just want to be left alone. So please! Leave!" she said, her voice breaking.

He looked at her, feeling his own emotions overwhelming, "I am not asking you to talk to me. Just think of me as another guest in this bar. I will not interfere in any way. I promise you I will stay quiet. But if you think I will leave you alone, after everything that you have done for us, for me, after what you have gone through, then you are wrong Meera. I will not leave you."

"Why do you not understand," Meera broke down further, "I need to cry, I need to feel this. This is going to get ugly. You will feel uncomfortable! Please just leave."

Chris considered her for a moment, then nodded and left. He soon returned with a stack of paper napkins and placed them on the table besides her phone and glasses. "This should get you through the next hour," he said. 

She looked at him, helpless, then sunk her head in her hands, crying further. Chris settled back in his chair, his body angled towards her. He wished she would let him comfort her, but somewhere, he also understood the importance of going through this alone. God only knows how many nights he had cried himself to sleep, refusing help from his own family, all because he wanted to stay alone.

Slowly, her sobs lessened. She used the new tissue and wiped her face, discarding it in the nearby bin. As she reached for the phone, Chris placed his hand on her mobile before her. "Don't change the song." "But you don't understand the lyrics," she said, her voice still broken. "No, but I like it. Let it play on loop," Chris said kindly. She nodded and took a sip of her drink. It looked a lot like neat whisky. Chris wondered, Why was the bartender repulsed? Was it because she was crying? That asshole.

After a few more sips, she said in a quiet voice, "Our Night." 

"Hmm?" 

"Our Night. The name of the song is Our Night. It is about how our night is a friend of the moon, but after a long time, she has come alone. She is darkness." Meera took another deep breath, "In the song, the singer wants to switch off all the lights and talk to the darkness. She understands that the darkness is hurtful. It is crazy even, but it is still hers. She just wants to be alone with the darkness."

Meera looked ahead and started crying again. Chris just looked at her, his own eyes brimming with tears now. He knew something had happened after she had left their suite. She didn't look like the type of person who broke down easily. He would give anything to find out who or what had upset her. 

He looked at her reflection in the window, his own tears trickling down his cheeks. Finally, he allowed his emotions to take over. 

That night, the stars in the moonless sky smiled down at them, as two people, from two different walks of life, cried together over what had happened, completely unaware of what the future had in store for them.

(This is the song if you want to listen ⬇️)

#chris evans #chris evans fanfic #chris evans fanfiction #chrisevans #chris evans family #chris evans x india #chris evans fandom #india #chris evans x ofc #chris evans x poc!reader #chris evans x plus size reader #chris evans x oc #chris evans x original female character #chris evans imagines #chris evans imagine #scott evans

[gleekto]

Why do you have to be rude to every ask that you think is silly? Yes some asks are super silly and uncalled for, but people actually adore your blog and sometimes they just wanna hear what you think. But then you'd go and be all rude to them for no reason whatsoever. It just doesn't make sense espically that your points are always perfect but they don't really need all the rudeness.

I was deciding whether to answer this but I decided I will…and I would like to say from the outset that my tone here is genuine and not sassy or sarcastic or anything else.

So, anon, one thing I have learned from blogging on this platform for 9 years (sheesh but true) and from email generally - one of the hardest things to convey correctly to everyone in written communication is tone. I may mean something as funny, you may see it as rude, another follower may see it as righteous, another follower may see it as exasperated…And it’s all the same thing.

I am imagining the 2 asks from today that you may have seen as rude were 1. the Amber one, and 2. the tinhat real estate one (tell me if I’m wrong)…While I can actually be quite irritated with anons sometimes (see any haters and any tinhat nonsense in my inbox), neither of these was even remotely that.

1. The Amber one - Where I say that ‘there is no eyeroll emoji big enough for anyone who thinks Amber is talking about Darren’ - That comment is about TINHATS (as in, I did not think that the asker thought Amber was talking about Darren, I was responding to the idea (BAFFLING and NONSENSE - you see, I have no patience for that cuckoo bananas stuff) that anyone could think Amber would do that…BUT if you read that answer as ‘I am giving you, the asker, an eyeroll emoji’ - Then it’s rude. So hopefully my asker understood!

2. The real estate one - I do assume this asker meant well and the truth is I am legitimately freaked out and appalled by tinhats getting detailed info on Darren’s real estate documents (like really who cares if they are moving and sold their house and renting now or have a trustee or whatever they’re on about - we all know this is just SO invasive and whatever ridiculous meaning they want to put on it is just their usual fantasy-making) - My genuine reaction was NO! I am not looking at that! Do not want! I worry about people getting so wrapped up in details of tinhat nonsense that they forget to take a step back and remember 1. what is real, and 2. that we should be respectful and loving fans. So I apologize to that anon if I sounded harsh - I was quite shocked. It wasn’t personal, more like appalled. 

But again, tone is hard to read. That will always be the case.

#gleekto asks

[literaticat]

I can’t tell if I’m getting red flags or just being too sensitive. An agent who requested my ms is coming across as rude and grumpy. They keep asking me to paste some info into an email which I’ve done but they don’t seem to see. Now they have problems downloading the ms which no one else has and write back I’m having problems downloading “whatever you sent me” which seems a rude way to put it rather than calling it a file. Should I back out now or proceed with caution? I’ve been polite back.

I mean -- email might not be good at conveying tone. Or they might be bad at email. Or their computer or email program might not play nicely with yours. Or they might just be a rude and grumpy person. Or they might be having a bad day. Or any, or all, of the above.

If you are really annoyed, and you don't think you like this person, of course you are under no obligation to send them any work. But I would not take them saying "whatever you sent me" rather than "your exquisite manuscript in an electronic file" as a red flag or an insult. After all, from their perspective, IT IS an un-openable and therefore unknowable thing you sent them.

No doubt if they are frustrated, it is with their computer that isn't behaving, not YOU personally.

So. Either cross them off your list, or else continue being polite, send them the ms, and see what happens. You will only need to worry about it if they love the book and want to offer after all, so I wouldn't concern myself about whether you get along like peas in a pod just yet.

[korikafez]

What she said: I'm still not entirely sure that this is what I want. I'm scared that I'll regret this for the rest of my life. I'm resisting the urge to call you, reactivate my facebook, tell you I'm sorry, that I love you and that I don't want this. But somehow I find it necessary to stop myself from doing that. I find it necessary to end the relationship.

I feel like I rely on you too much for my happiness, and that it has made me expect too much from you, and hold grudges against you when those expectations haven't been met. I've spent these past years waiting for you to make my days pleasant and my body pleased, but I've never even thought about doing those things for myself. I haven't once gone to a place on my own and through my own means. I've yet to make the effort of satisfying my own sexual needs. Although I know you've expressed before that you do not feel I'm a burden on you, and that you do not mind taking me to places or tending to my desires, it has put pressure on the way I feel about and treat you.

I need to split from you because I need to make sure that I can be my own person. I need to know that I can take care of myself alone.

I'm not saying that the relationship has impeded me from growing. On the contrary, it has helped me mature in many ways. But by ending it, I'm forcing myself to not depend on you any longer. I'm obliged to move beyond my comfort zone. I'm unsure of whether it'll actually help, but I consider it to be worth the try.

I don't want to ask you for time. We've talked about not wanting blurry lines before. It's not fair to make you put your life on hold. If in the mean time either of us discovers that we're better off without eachother, then I hope we'll both be wise enough to respect that and move on. As for me, I'm not looking for a better person, or any person at all. I only want to spend some time on my own. I'm terrified at the thought of not being with anyone, but I think that fear is my major motivation at the moment.

I need to discern what it is I want and require, once and for all. I can't keep forcing you to guess for me.

I have and always will have great appreciation for you and everything you've done. You've gone beyond your interests to care for me in every way. You're an excellent man, and I will never forget the kindness with which you've treated me. I don't know whether it'd be possible to reattempt a life together in the future. I do know, however, that I will always hold a special place for you in my life. You're my ally, and you've proven that I can always trust you, and so I will. I can only hope I've at least gained some of your trust, as well.

I hope that this does not affect the trip to Cali in any way. I would understand if you do not wish to see me from here on, but please know that I would like to have you there with me. I do not want either of us to miss that opportunity. If you're worried about the fact that we'll be sharing a room and bed, you can let me know, but I personally do not mind it. You're still my friend.

Please let me know, when you can, that you have received this email. I will accept any kind of reply. I will not judge you, or get angry with you. I'm at peace with you right now, and can only hope that you're not angry with me either.

As I said before, my phone number will always be the same. So will my emails and home adresses. You can write to me or call me at any time.

I will miss you.

what hapoened: She cheated, didnt admit it. i knew. acted like I didjt.

what Isaid: Dear you,

I'm not opposed to meeting tomorrow to talk, in whatever the tone. However if its a meeting to make the breakup more formal, I am obliged to respectfully decline the invitation given that I understood clearly the first time, that I don't see the point in reiterating the breakup just for formality and that I have had a very difficult week.

I don't want you to get me the wrong way, I'm not trying to get at you, I'm trying to cope with my current situation the best that I can. Again, I don't oppose meeting altogether tomorrow, provided you know what you're going to say. I am not looking forward to periods of silence, ambiguity or fear of expression. My disposition is not a spiteful one and my ears are open.

Given my considerations, you let me know if you want to meet me, when and how.

If you're concerned, I am available today after 9 pm and before 10, given confirmation before 8 pm.

[lefthanded-sans]

Heya! You're a linguist, right? Any advice for someone who would love to get into English linguistics with a burning passion, but don't see that as being possible owing to the fact that they're a foreigner/not a native speaker and are afraid they might not get any work because of it other than translation (and I'm guessing the pay isn't that great anyway)? Or just, what's it like being a linguist?

Heyaaaa! Great to chat with you again! Sorry for being so slow responding to you, and I hope this answer helps!

I’ll go through all of these questions, because why not? I want to help as much as I can, and I’m always willing to help and talk more. I’ll also be backtracking and talking some basics of what it means to be a linguist, just so that other people who read this can follow along with the discussion. 

What it’s like being a linguist!

Unlike what many people might suspect, linguistics isn’t a field about speaking a ton of languages. While many linguists speak more than one tongue fluently, that’s because we love language, not because that’s the heart of our profession. Linguistics is the scientific study of language, and it covers everything from how we anatomically pronounce words, to the physical acoustic properties of language, to how words and sentences are structured, to how we humans socially respond to language, and more. It means there are a ton of subfields in linguistics, and that linguistics can often get interdisciplinary.

My primary subfield all throughout my undergraduate and graduate work was phonetics, which is the study of language at its smallest sound units. I studied the acoustic properties of sounds, how the vocal tract biologically was made up and moved to create these sounds, the acoustic makeup of all the tiny sound units in a language (often represented as letters in languages) - aka phonemes, how the presence of one sound unit can alter how another is pronounced, things like phrasal tone where your voice pitch varies throughout a sentence, and more.

While I love phonetics, the truth is that the high majority of my career work hasn’t been in phonetics. Almost all of my work has been in the semantic-syntactic interface - where the meaning of sentences interacts with how sentences are structured. In a given day of work, I’ll receive hoards of written sentences online from a computer database. My overseers will tell me how they want me to analyze and organize the data, usually through some sort of annotation scheme where I make notes on top of the sentences. I analyze how meaning is embedded through the structure of the sentences according to that annotation scheme, then send the data back to be processed by computers. That’s because most of my work has to do with machine learning. For computers to get better at understanding sentences, we feed data with annotations to them to help them understand how to parse sentences. Then, they can make future better “comprehension” choices on their own with new sentences they receive. This has a variety of applications, including improving online search functions or making virtual assistants like Siri and Amazon Echo understand you better.

There is a somewhat fair though not unending amount of work to be found in this area, if you know where to look.

Now, I’m going to be transparent about the financial situation and work stability situation of my jobs. That way, you can decide whether or not it’s something you want to gamble yourself. And it is a little gamble because I’m not living a full-time, steady, long-term job. Currently, I work as a contract consultant, annotator, and adjudicator. Sometimes clients will hire me to look at their data for one month, three months, or in the luckiest cases, a year. This means I am constantly looking for new work, I don’t have any health, etc. benefits because I’m part-time (this is of course an issue for my country, not internationally), and I often am doing one to four contracts simulntaneously. There’s also something to be said that, even when I’m hired for a position, data comes in SPURTS - sometimes there are weeks where I’m twiddling my thumbs doing nothing, and other weeks where I am overloaded with tight deadlines and have to work around the clock. 

In all of my positions, I’m working temporarily with clients in part-time temporary jobs. It’s remote work where I can choose the hours of the day I work, chill in my pajamas at home, all sorts of great stuff. I communicate with my coworkers or superiors almost entirely through email and online chat, with the RARE Skype call or face-to-face meeting.I tend to get my contracts through a company called Appen or by connecting with old peers from my university days (I still work for my university’s cognitive science research department, in fact). I started doing annotations part-time when I was an undergraduate sophomore in 2012 and was paid about $11 an hour. Now, I make about $18-20 per hour for my contract positions. Specifically, I have slowly bargained up my pay from about $12 to $20 in the last year. So I’m getting increasingly paid higher with each new gig. I don’t know how much higher I can increasingly climb, but it’s not bad pay when I get enough hours (and hours is where it’s hardest to win).

Other linguists will have different types of jobs than me. There is a ton of work - and good stable work! - in the computational linguistics field if you’re interesting in programming and working with the computer side of studying language. That’s the safest gamble. Other linguists will contact indigenous people groups to study endangered languages, and spend their days either out in the field recording speech with tape recorders, or studying the language closely in their office. Others will get their TOEFL certificates and teach English to non-native speakers. Lots of different things that might come up. Again, if you know where to look, and if you’re creative enough to know how to apply your degree to different things.

You’re right that translation is one of the areas you see the most job openings for. Depending on all the languages you know, it’ll be easier or harder to break into. I’ve never looked into translation. I doubt I’d get hired, first of all; I live in a an area which has a high percentage of bilingual Spanish speakers, so everyone’s going to hire the people who speak both Spanish and English fluently and natively (as versus me, who grew up in a monolingual household and started to learn Spanish at thirteen years old). Lots of translation jobs even specify that they want you to be a NATIVE speaker of the language you’re translating, which means that someone like me who came from a monolingual household is 100% out of luck. The other reason why I don’t do translation is because, while there are some translation jobs that pay okay, lots of them don’t, and lots of them in my country/state aren’t full-time. I’ve seen a number of translation positions that pay you by the number of words or pages you translate, and the pay isn’t that pretty when you add it up. 

That’s not true for all translation jobs, though, especially if you happen to speak high demand but less commonly spoken languages for your region (in my area, something like Arabic or Bangladeshi could get you a pretty penny). ASL (American Sign Language) translator jobs in my country are always nice gigs. And people who speak English as a second language and something else “uncommon” as their first language have a pretty good shot of being hired for something.

But I know translation isn’t what you’re interested in. Which is fair.

Now, as far as breaking into English linguistics as a non-native speaker, you’re right that you’ll probably run into obstacles, but they’re not imposssssssible to get around. Especially if your verbal speech is anything like the writing you do for English, you’re almost certainly FINE. This following discussion is more specifically for the academic community of linguistics, but what I would do whenever I wanted to study a language I didn’t speak… was get an academic partner who did. And in many types of studies you do, depending on your linguistics subfield, you won’t even need to worry about that. Honestly the biggest challenge isn’t whether English is your first language or not, because linguists get their fingers over any language whenever and wherever they can… the biggest challenge is that English has been very thoroughly studied academically in linguistics compared to many other languages. VERY thoroughly studied. Whereas I had an easier time finding unstudied topics in languages like Khmer, I’d be harder pressed to find easy research areas in languages like Mandarin or Spanish. Buuuuuuuuut there are still many, many Unknowns I have come across in English linguistics - for instance, lots and lots and lots that needs to be done in the sociolinguistic arena. Most of my doctorate peers wrote their second year papers on English. Granted, that was a sample size of five people, but nevertheless. There are still things to be said about the language academically, if you know where and how to look.

Whether or not this’ll be a big hindrance to you depends on more choices than “I want to study English linguistics.” It reaaaaaally depends what subfield you want to get into, whether you go into graduate school, whether you want to enter lingusitics academia or something else, and where you live and how accessible/fluent English is to your overall populace. In some fields more than others, you may find barriers. So be careful, but don’t rule out opportunities completely. I’ll point out I’ve seen native speakers of Arabic, Russian, Spanish, Japanese, Polish, and Mandarin professionally study English… so it’s certainly something that’s not uncommon or impossible!

#linguistics #non-UT #long post #blabbing Haddock #ask #ask me #itsrainingsomewhereelse

[blessedarethebinarybreakers]

Hi! i'm Alicia, 23 n bi, i'm a non denominational evangelical, and strugling a bit with my sexuality and need some advice :/ The thing is that i decided to not persue a relationship with a woman, only with men, but i also don't date at all, it´s kind of hard for me because of a previous abusive boyfriend, the church i go it's very accepting but they tell u u must persue a straight relationship or chose celibacy. The thing is im cool with that, i consider myself mainly in love with God but 1/3

i have my 9 year best friend, she (cis/straight i think so) have never had any problem with me being bi, she has always supported me and she is also a christian, we are ver deeply connected with God and the church. She jokes a lot about us being wives, or being engaged (she also doesn’t date much) she is very affectionate, holds my hand sometimes and stays hugged to me while we walk or things like that. The thing is some people are starting to suspect we r a couple n i’m kinda scared 2/3

i’m not out to the leaders or pastors, because there is some part that is still conservative, only some friends know about me. She has been very close lately, more than usual, and i don’t know if i’m getting mixed signals, i’m not that affectionate because of me being bi The other night we went dancing and it was all very… gay, people stared at us n im kinda confused and worried about how this can affect her life, her parents r very strict, just like my mom, n idk, i feel scared n confused 3/3

Hey there, sorry for the delay. You’re in a hard situation, and I really feel for you.

You need to have a frank discussion with your friend about this. Pick a time when you can be alone and don’t have anywhere to be so you have plenty of time to talk. If you’re too nervous to talk about it in person, texting or emailing works too (though maybe make sure she knows you want the written conversation to be in private).

Let her know that her jokes about you being wives/engaged and the physical affection make you nervous when done in front of others. You have a right to choose if and when you come out to people, and I’m sure it’s painful to have people be “suspicious” in such a negative way. You are well within your rights to ask your friend to tone it down.

I also think you should ask her what’s going on -- whether her jokes and physical affection and all are her ways of hinting that she likes you. If the answer is no, at least then you know! If the answer is yes, you’ll need to have a conversation about where you both want to go from there. Do you like her too, or would you prefer for her feelings not to “go” anywhere? Would you want the relationship to be secret, or to navigate how to come out to family and church together? Are you both on firm footing in regards to knowing that God affirms LGBT relationships? and so on. 

Best of luck to you, and I’m praying things turn out okay for you! I think you’ll feel better after a conversation with your friend, whether or not her answers are what you’re hoping or expecting them to be. A lot is weighing on your mind, and it’s not going to get better unless you communicate with her.

If anyone else has thoughts or advice, please share! 

#loveisamountain #queerly christian asks #if you didn't want this published let me know and i'll delete it! #i saved it as a draft so then it wouldn't let me answer it privately #friendship tag #homophobia mention #biphobia mention

[topicprinter]

"It's never ever going to be anything near plain sailing... it's more like clinging onto the wheel, putting every ounce of strength you have into staying on course, whilst 40ft waves crash into the boat."So many articles are written about the cultural phenomena known as the ‘start-up’ most of which talk about employees and management brainstorming over games of ping pong, working on bean bags, and having spontaneous Nerf fights throughout the day.I’m going to cut out the bullshit and provide you all with a brutally honest article about how running a startup really is.People I meet, often ask what I do, and when they hear the words “I run a start-up” exit my mouth, immediately they give remarks such as... 'Oh cool, like Google?' (A company whose name is now a part of the Oxford Dictionary is no longer allowed to be considered a startup!) 'WOW! That must be so much fun!' and 'I bet you have really cool offices!' – Half the time they don’t even ask what my start-up even does - They are too busy envisaging a rose tinted world of colourful furniture, short days and quirky decor.As frustrating as these misconceptions are - you can't really blame the reader. I think the fault lies with the business people who want to seem 'cool' or 'quirky' at the cost of sacrificing the reality of building a new business.The Real '#Startuplife'I read a quote from the founder of Pandora once, which I felt aptly described running a startup in 7 words: "A constant seesaw of worry and euphoria." Now don't get me wrong, I love having my own company, it is incredibly rewarding... But I feel like the whole '#Startuplife' trend needs a more realistic and honest representation within the media. By never talking about the weeks spent without sleep, the constant fear of failure, and the relationships and connections you sacrifice in order to even get a hint of success... we are portraying an image of business that is simply untrue.Being someone who is now on their third startup I can honestly tell you that... Running a young company is never ever going to be plain sailing... it's more like clinging onto the wheel, putting every ounce of strength you have into staying on course whilst 40ft waves crash into the boat. We constantly hear about the VC backed startups that have just closed another $100 million round of funding... Whilst impressive and certainly an important milestone for said company... it just isn't a reality that the majority of startups will ever have.Picture this okay... A CEO sat on an exercise ball at their desk, money rolling in, VC's ringing non-stop, staff playing table tennis whilst the dulcet tones of an indie band play in the background, the sunlight reflecting off of the exposed brick walls. Now throw that mental image in the trash and re-imagine a sweaty, sleep deprived CEO in their office, on a Saturday, in the dark... eyes bloodshot from reading emails, whilst their staff are at home asleep in bed.As an entrepreneur, your biggest (and harshest) critic is you... It's your baby at the end of the day, meaning its main well-being lies with YOU - and when you realise that, the whole thing becomes incredibly daunting... You are used to working under someone who calls the shots, and soon the initial "Great I'm my own boss!" thing turns into "This isn't working, I need to ask my boss... ah, shit."If you are lucky enough (depending on how you see it) to gain investment, both the stress and pressure increase even more... As it is no longer just yourself you need to satisfy... Sure, a $100 million investment gets you the sweet office, as many staff members as you wish, the nice car, the fancy watch... but it doesn't alleviate the anxiety and the fear of failure... in fact, it heightens it... as now you have a $100 million that has been given to you in TRUST... Not to mention that word travels fast in the world of startups and business.. so A LOT of eyes are going to be on you, to see how far that $100 million gets you/your company.Your days and nights will blend into one, you won't be able to sleep... your mind filled with stress, the only thing stopping your head from hitting that keyboard is the gallon of coffee you have just finished. Weekends will start to mean nothing to you, and the very notion of 'switching off' is laughable... You will constantly have the questions "Is this even worth it?" and "Why did I leave my job for this?" running through your brain as you pound down yet another 'cup o'joe'... Sounds glamorous right?It's about one thingAt the risk of sounding cliché, the greatest entrepreneurs all have one thing in common: PASSION. Nothing else will get you through hell like passion... If you don't have love for the company you want to create, then you will die VERY quickly. Your desire for money or fame will not get you anywhere (in the long term at least)... If you listen to or read up on all of the noteworthy entrepreneurs of modern society... their ideas did not spring from a desire to be worth $50 billion, instead, they came from their passion to create, and push forward in their respective fields.The problems with going into business with the mindset of becoming 'rich' are that.... 1 - you will put profit over innovation, sacrificing your companies longevity. 2 - As soon as you make any money one of two things will happen... either you will lose all drive whatsoever, or you will throw quality out of the window and replicate your product until it becomes stagnant and dies. 3 - You will be known as nothing other than a paper chaser, and you will have no real impact on the business world.You can do itIf you can push through the sleep deprivation, the anxiety, the fear and the emotional torment... It will get better, that much I can promise you. It will never be easy though, as soon as you surpass one challenge, another is waiting in line... but I think, in some twisted way... that is half the fun of it. There is nothing more satisfying than overcoming an obstacle, and seeing both you and your team grow... however cliché it sounds, I can promise that if you keep fighting, and keep that passion burning then you will succeed... If you don't do it the first time... that's okay. Failure is life's biggest educational tool, trust me I have made many mistakes in my time, but I have always found a way to use them to better myself... no matter how hard they had kicked my arse.Remember what I said earlier about being in the boat? "It's never ever going to be anything near plain sailing... it's more like clinging onto the wheel, putting every ounce of strength you have into staying on course, whilst 40ft waves crash into the boat." Well if you keep hanging on, pushing the right direction, the storm will pass and the water will clear... It won't always be flat... but remember you survived those 40ft waves.Thanks for reading!Thanks for taking the time to check out the article! If you have any thoughts or questions don't hesitate to get in touch! - I'd love to hear your stories about starting your businesses - whether you are a seasoned veteran or are new to the game, meet me in the comments below and we can chat! If you want to read the original article (and see other blog posts) you can check it out on Linkedin

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