#and i have a third one planned out

[theonewhowails]

rotating this fucked up cat in my head like a rotisserie chicken

#my art #cotl #cotl narinder #i was ruminating on the robes that the followers wear in game #and i thought it was interesting that high loyalty followers have a third eye stitched onto their hoods #because like on narinder this eye would go right where his actual third eye is #so are the robes made in the image of the red crown? or of him? #well even if the eye was a reference to the appearance of the one who waits. the followers prob think its the crown's eye #something to be said about how there is no imagery of the one who waits in the cult supposedly made to worship him #like babygirl i dont think thats great planning for ensuring this cult remains devoted to you. look whats happened now #ANYWAYS the robes are a little bit of his getup from the veil and a little bit high loyalty follower robes #and also a little bit inversion of the lamb's fleece #the bell is also a ref to lamby's get up ofc #but also its to stop narinder from scaring the shit out of followers. its not working

[captainhysunstuff]

22 more images (with some saucy shenanigans and immature "seduction" tactics towards the end) below the cut:

Ryuk makes his grand return and is brought up to speed with Light and L's immoral union. The date seems pretty successful~.

Next (not yet)

Previous

First

Master List

Transcript

#drawn by me #my fanart #my fancomic #Death Note #The Chain #lawlight #Light Yagami #L #Ryuk #smooch #saucy shenanigans #suggestive dialogue #Ryuk third-wheeling~ #L meets Light's quirky-deadly roommate #henh not much to say about this one. basically a continuation of the previous entry despite the absurd update gap. #I've lost the ability to keep anything brief anymore~ #L seems a bit out of character with his willingness to go with the plan huh? And don't you think he'd have gotten used to Light's teasing b #now? Maybe it hits a little different knowing for a fact that it's coming from Kira's mouth directed towards him of all people~ #Also the picture where Ryuk is saying he'll scram when things get heated is probably my favorite drawing of him that I've done! #he was so intimidating to draw especially over and over in comic form. such a far cry from my usual human style #but like all things I gradually became more and more comfortable drawing him. I'm very happy about that! :) #I have a dumb idea/headcanon concerning the nerds' first copulation attempt~. #if I decide to include it here I will definitely try to age restrict it even though it won't necessarily be graphic. #don't wanna get in trouble lol #I have more trouble drawing spicy scenes than I do with shinigami subjects XD #tw: food issues #they both eat the sketchy 'apple' to prove they're not cowards... despite it not being the smartest idea in the world. >_>

[necessarymeanstoanend]

do you know what a knave is?; an unprincipled man, rogue.

nigel’s

white void of doom and sketch

details

#aaaand here’s alex #why the FUCK is eddie so hard to draw?!?! #you guys are just going to have to excuse the fact that it really doesn’t look much like him #this turned out a little bit better than i expected but it did indeed take three different references to get the desired result #4 hours and 23 minutes #somebody get these hoes better haircuts #the original plan was to have him looking upwards more dramatically but we’re gonna start small when it comes to alex #this is only like my third time drawing eddie ​but now i want to draw alex again and the voices won’t let me sleep #this one looks very odd. there’s a ​couple of obvious things i can see now that i would change if i could do this over again but eh. #i’ll worry about that later #ANIMAL SYMBOLISM #i used the same skeleton design for the background with this one as well #like minds #murderous intent #like minds 2006 #alex forbes #art #fanart #drawing #digital art #alex forbes fanart #artist of tumblr #eddie redmayne #like minds fanart #i think now it’s time for me to draw them together but what should they be doing??

[ash-and-starlight]

.

#alright re: last reblog #first of all zuko is a massive bitch and i love him so much #second u know he was just like there is One person in the world that katara wants to murder more than me so let’s do that #so she can let it out And spare my ass <3 #tHIRD ppl it’s not really surprising that zuzu is pro murder like #boy was supposed to inherit an imperialist empire and keep up an imperialist war #idk if ozai was the only one able to get the throne without going to battle once but iroh and lu ten were generals. led armies. #zuko was Fully prepared to take on that role too (see: the fateful war meeting) #he’s been raised with the yeah murder is a thing that you’ll have to do mindset #like he’s not a killer but he Would do it if the circumstances called for it #(sokka parallel btw) #does it make sense? #also like #he fully says that if he wasn’t such a firm believer in destiny he Could and Would have killed ozai on the day of the black sun #he says it to his face #this would be a fun au actually lmao like. the gaang bursting into the room and there’s just zuko there #next to ozai’s lightning fried corpse #like hello 🧍🏻‍♂️👋🏼 zuko here 😬🔥 #and has to convince everyone he’s good and friendly now this is not an evil plan 🫶🏼 #last thing but this reminds me #WHERE is that post that was like #sokka finds out zuko could have ended the war the day of the black sun but didn’t and just throttles him #<333 #if you read all this ty i’m sorry i’m kissing u #send post

[gibbearish]

ive seen ppl saying smth in the wider plagiarism discussion to the tune of "don't worry anxious people, it's impossible to accidentally plagiarize!" and i feel like that lacks a lot of nuance that anxious brains like mine latch on to to just dismiss the possibility outright, as well as a lack of life experiences fueling it.

it is possible to "accidentally plagiarize" in that you can read something, forget about it, then a while later have your brain spit the ideas back out without telling where it got them. so of course you just assume they're yours and share them as such, because That's Where Most Of The Thoughts In Your Head Come From! and it both is and isn't plagiarism, you weren't /intending/ to pass someone's else's work off as your own, i'd even say in a way you were just as much a victim of misinformation as your audience. but you very much so did still resuse the work of someone else, even if you don't remember it.

but in my experience, this kind of thing also happens to a lot of people. you tell a friend a joke then wake up in a cold sweat two days later realizing the reason they didnt laugh was because they'd told you that joke a month ago. you reply to a friend's text and after sending you realized you ended it with the same exact phrase as theirs. you're writing edgy poetry and write a line you really like only to see it in a text post two days later saying youve already liked the post. like, it happens. so if it DOES happens and you're just honest and explain, people will understand. something like "oh shit im sorry, i totally have read that, i mustve forgotten and only remembered bits and pieces and just thought they were mine. thank you for letting me know and for the source" works wonders.

people know you can forget things. people won't automatically doubt your apology just because all true plagiarists say it was accidental. HOPEFULLY people can understand the nuance between a genuine remorseful explanation, and a thief who hoped no one would find out scrambling for excuses for why they did it. and those who can't, that's a them problem, not a you problem, you've taken responsibility for your actions as much as you can. they think the answer is simple, that the only thing stopping you from saying "yes i did it on purpose, i knew the whole time and deliberately copied them" is shame/inability to admit to your actions. but sometimes things AREN'T that simple, so imo ppl who are shitty to you for not following the script they made up for you in their head should be ignored

#youre allowed to make up scripts for people in fact good luck stopping yourself since thats kinda just part of how conversation works #is you try to predict how your audience will react to a certain statement #and my therapist actually encouraged me to practice run stuff i wanna talk about in sessions because That Makes It Easier To Talk About #like who cares if it's rehearsed‚ it's still the truth‚ yknow? #however that only applies to the things /you/ want to say. you are the only one aware of this script and the only one who agreed to it in #the first place which is why you plan contingencies into the script #is because you only have control over one character and can only take guesses at what the others might say #if you guess wrong and they do something different that doesnt mean /theyre/ not following the script #it means /your/ copy was a misprint and you filled in the blanks wrong. so do what good actors do and improvise. you'll get back on script #eventually. or not‚ if your guesses devolved into wildly speculative fanfiction‚ but frankly you knew going into it that #most of your script was guesswork so you should be prepared to have to make some things up on the fly #or see again: prepare contingencies #if your guesswork on your copy of the script turns out to be wrong‚ wouldnt it be sooo handy to have a second copy which follows this #version of events much better? #and if not that one‚ maybe this third? how about this fourth? etc etc etc #but really just. when guessing at what others will say. know that you are guessing and dont hold it against /them/ if youre wrong #sorry ik that wasnt super related to the post itself im just also passionate abt that #plagiarism #james somerton

[prussianmemes]

you should kill yourself if you spend 12 minutes sorting around your notes on your desk, making sure they look messy but also the prettiest ones are on top, posing your textbook open and having the most "academia" looking web page or lecture slides on your laptop screen before taking a picture and posting it on your social media story while quietly scrolling through songs to put with it.

#every time exam season comes around #people do this religiously #i hate it profusely it's so incredibly vain and pointless #you're like the people who go to the library for an epic study day and set up your big environment #only to sit on your phone for 5 hours #have the humility to be honest about your study habits and what works and what doesn't #i feel like its a form of cognitive dissonance this type of stuff and a form of lying to themselves #which is the one person you should always be brutally honest to #txt #i plan ahead and give myself so much extra time because i know my time efficiency is dogshit and i compensate for that #i try to avoid talking to other people about studying and i try to insulate myself when i am #of course for med school it's impossible not to talk about it as your classmates will bring it up in every third conversation #which opens the pandora's box of listening to other people talk about it which is atrocious as all people ever take away from it is #'oh my god everyone is doing so much more i'm so behind' #which isn't true everyone is in their own variation of hell just slightly different #i try to block it out completely when i can #med students have this annoying tendency to group themselves into these circles of self feeding despair and nervousness #i mean all of med insta is full of dogshit memes like this of the same 'le epic med stress' memes #kill yourselves you people are self fulfilling prophecies #josef lada ice these fools #to chce klid #as the man said #a taky trošku sebevědomí #and also not listening or giving a fuck what anyone else is doing #každý ma svůj systém a svůj styl #and have a life outside of this as well

[studentofetherium]

i have another OC piece out, this one a VesalBlood story focused on two new OCs of mine! very excited to finally get to show Kryce and Theresta off

#content warning suicide stuff in the second chapter #vesalblood #my writing #i have a third chapter planned for these two #but it's taken longer to write than i expected #so i'm just going to put these two chapters out and do the third one later

[oveliagirlhaditright]

Things that sillily make me happy: the fact that in the official Buffy chess set they released, Buffy and Angel are queen and king chess pieces.

And, I mean, it just makes sense that they would do this, of course. As it looks like this set was based on early season two, as Spike and Drusilla are the king and queen pieces for black.

But Buffy and Angel being king and queen pieces works so well, since they're paired together, of course. And equal to each other... and a battle couple. And more than anything, this is great because the queen's the most powerful piece on the board and Buffy's the most powerful character in the series, of course. And her being more powerful than Angel just tracks. Because she canonically is. And this makes me think of the many times where she saved him and he was the damsel.

Anyway...

#buffy the vampire slayer #bangel #i was looking at this set on ebay again. in thinking about christmas gifts for people #also i found out that there are three buffy board games. four if you you want to count that the unmatched buffy set that doesn't fully coun #but meh #i had thought there were three when i was browsing lately but now i know for sure. there's also an ats one. so if you want to count that #and not see angel as its own thing there are actually four #still bummed. though. that the ats expansion of the one buffy game got canceled on account of covid:( it sounded so cool #i'm also not counting the buffy chess set as a game: i'm meaning board games here. if you want to count the buffy chess set then #there's even more #basically (not counting the chess set) it looks like there was this one buffy game and then that game did a spinoff angel game #then after that (i think) there was a legendary version of buffy (legendary is a game series oc) #then after that there was a new buffy game that got an expansion set and then was going to have one more expansion set in the form of ats #but covid sadly ruined that plan:( #and then there's a game called 'unmatched' and there's a set you can get of that that adds buffy characters to the game. but the game itsel #isn't a buffy game #though don't quote me on this... (because i have not played the game) if you only have the buffy unmatched set perhaps it would just be a #buffy game. but it's not set out to be a buffy game or anything like that #i do know two people who have played the buffy unmatched set and really enjoyed it #me myself i've played the third buffy game i listed here (the one with one expansion and was supposed to have an angel one) and it was fun:

[fictionadventurer]

I have three stories that I would like to write at least some part of before the deadline for the Inklings Challenge.

I am scrolling tumblr and obsessively looking up book recommendations online.

I see some problems here.

#adventures in the inklings challenge #i am having a scatterbrained week #so very tired yet unable to sleep #mind going off in a million different directions #unable to focus because i have an event at 7 pm #i keep trying to do inklings housekeeping and then forgetting what i was supposed to do #i would like a refund on this brain #at least the obsessive book rec scrolling could be useful for at least one of the ideas #so far the plan is: finish the short story that's been my main focus for the challenge #by just starting at the beginning and writing instead of trying to finesse old material into the new outline #try to write at least one scene that's more of a prequel to the other main idea #and if by some magic i have time left (where??? i don't think you understand the concept of linear time sweetheart) #scribble out a version of the third idea #oh wait there's a fourth one! #that's one's very scribbly though #that one could realistically be written in saturday spare moments #i guess the hope with idea 3 would more accurately be a hope to *start* so it's an unfinished story to write after the deadline #rather than trying to sneak in a new story under the inklings umbrella under false pretenses

[dailykillermoth]

the Official winner of the Ultimate D-List Villain Tournament™ is...

KILLER MOTH !!! 🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉

#first. no we are not biased on killermoth.com no one saw this coming i swear. #second. this man has never won anything in his entire life let him have this. #AND THIRD. i SWEAR i did not plan this but him winning on april fools is some sorta cruel fate.. #d list tournament #ty for sticking this one out yall it was fun even if it May have been predictable gfjfdhf #firefly vs polka dot man will forever be iconic to me #im gonna shut up in these tags now & just make a follow up post in a bit ok byee #btw sorry this is late i just woke up 👍

[kindnotestoself]

HEARTBROKEN

#I'm the bad guy because I want to postpone Christmas at my in laws because one of them tested positive for covid #and I don't want to postpone physical therapy at my cancer hospital again #it's been a month I NEED that therapy #we had plans to meet with so many friends #and I said if we do go #we are staying separate house #not talking to family for risk of them having it #and we cant see any of our friends #Hubby is not happy with that at all #Grr babe I have no immune system #the patients at the cancer hospital have no immune system #one of our friends is hanging out with me between flights #another has small children #the third has been ill and disabled since childhood #and I;m the bad guy for putting my foot down' #I can;t cry anymore because of damage from all my brain surguries #but I'm sobbing #I feel so bad #enforcing my boundaries hurts sometimes #kn2s talks #covid

[akkivee]

fr tho how much of rei’s exposition was the truth if he’s still willing to let ichiro believe his mom is dead 😞

#this is vee speaking #this was my other win btw lol that nayuta was taken out by the old government lol #and that chuuoku inherited rei’s leverage 😔 #but rei’s still playing the bad guy here lol i’m just not quite following why #he said the world he’s envisioning is still a wip tho so i would assume whatever role rei is still taking is one to prop up ichiro???? #it’s just a very convoluted plot to get ichiro back to their old home to not tell him about his mom #but to tell him about the true hypnosis mic #hhhhhhhhhh like maybe on the same vein as a mysterious third factor rei’s warning ichiro of THAT thing’s existence #in order to get ichiro on the path to stop it #i fully believe rei wants to change the world i just don’t think i believe him saying his ideal was mass brainwashing #that was otome’s plan lol not his #but rei keeps!!!!!! trying to bring ichiro to his side!!!!!!!! in all the wrong ways!!!!!!!! #is he really that bad with his son now lmao????????? or is there a reason he keeps coming at ichiro with a clashing ideal and knowing it??? #‘well it’s my duty as a father to face my rebellious son head on’ to parallel shakku facing off against kuukou to set him back on track???? #like a test to see where ichiro’s at????????? i still have questions rei lmao

[wildberryjams]

Hello ♡ It's been a while!

It's been over a year I think? I haven't kept track tbqh

I'm not really back, because I want to be noncommittal as possible (since I have a tendency to disappear when my motivation to write does)

But this is me saying that I'm finally working on under the rose again! ♡

I'd all but abandoned it months ago, but yesterday I had a burst of energy and managed to write a couple hundred words. Tonight, the total is 1300. It's not much, but it's a start!

I don't talk about my personal life for many reasons, but this year has been one of the most difficult I've ever experienced. The last thing on my mind has been Will and Azul, as much as I wish they'd kept occupying every inch of it like they used to.

That spark is coming back, I think! ♡ (More in the tags since this is getting long)

#I have lots of plans for this story since what I have published is barely one third of the entire thing #It works in three acts if I'm remembering my outline correctly. I'm still re-familiarizing myself with it #But yes I do intend on trying to get part 2 of ch. 9 out in the coming weeks! #I also wanted to continue the Ruby x Bobby x Stef love triangle in a band au setting but I'm seeing that the app is gone? #I cannot even begin to describe how upset I am that S1-3 are all gone before I was able to replay properly #Not to do a sharp turn but it's been a very taxing year mentally and I want to start the new year off by trying to work on a resolution #Which is finishing a fic! I don't know if I'll finish it in 2024 but I'm determined to write as much as I'm able #Anyway I will still be a fandom recluse but I'm excited to catch up on all the writing I've missed ♡ #Posting this and going promptly to sleep ♡ (Insomnia is a huge part of UTR's conception LOL)

[stars-inthe-sky]

UGH.

#went on my first real work trip in FOUR YEARS yesterday. had one meeting. #woke up this morning and was getting ready for a day of stuff with another one tomorrow #only to find out that one of the only five other people in the wednesday meeting just tested positive for covid #and another had found out she'd been separately exposed as well #so today turned into doing all my meetings on zoom and rearranging travel plans #and now instead of a professional thing i'd been really looking forward to and then a fun weekend add-on with the fam #i'm flying home late tonight to isolate in our third-floor guest room while boyfriend parents etc. #at least we got credit for his and bébé's last-minute flight cancellations #and we decided to leave the dog with the sitter that had already been arranged to just have one less thing on the collective plate for now #but UGH #and what's extra infuriating is that i am probably fine. i got boosted just a few weeks ago and wasn't like hugging anyone or whatever. #but you just don't know and when there's an actual case it's reason to be actually careful #and i'm just so exhausted and bummed about a lot of things already and had so been looking forward to this whole trip #best laid plans #as they say #anyway cross your fingers for me and the battery of rapid tests i'll be taking this weekend #and in addition to staying negative i'm also very concerned about whether anyone will be comfortable will me at thanksgiving #so that's a whole other thing #UGHHHHHHH #fucking #coronavirus

[johanthefriskiestofbits]

oooooo please tell me (who knows nothing on the subject) about orv swap au

hehehe. hehehehehehe. hehehehehehehhehehehhheheheh <- guy who is so normal

the premise of orv swap au (name has yet to be finalized) is this: what if kdj and yjh swapped narrative positions (reader <-> character) but very little else? what if a video game player enters a time loop to save his favorite character from dying over and over again and also to end the apocalypse?

admittedly it's not super fleshed out yet (a lot of the changes this premise would introduce are still not hammered out yet) but here are some points under the cut (novel spoilers ahead!)

orv swap au starts with pro gamer yjh who feels :/ abt his job, but hey, it pays the bills. despite (or maybe because of) his relative popularity as a pro gamer and networking with the agency/sponsors/people to impress, he's kind of isolated in a way that's detrimental, a facade of someone he's not whenever he's on camera

something to play around with is the idea of agency? maybe this yjh doesn't feel like he has any and has his hands tied between the lifestyle and being under public scrutiny and not having enough of a support system to leave everything behind. maybe he doesn't know what else he would even do. maybe he's aimless and drifting with nothing to hold on to.

his favorite video game is what i've been thinking of as World's Hardest To Play Indie Game (not based on difficulty but just on the experience of consuming it) a boring, exposition heavy, player-hostile, poorly designed, slightly buggy mess of a barely-playable game: twsa, a game that was not finished upon release and experiences with sporadic updates every now and then.

the ending tree to this game is so convoluted its insane. also theres no save states so if you die (very likely) u restart babeyyy.

twsa (video game) does have multiple endings, all of which happen when kdj, your main character, dies. some are farther into the apocolypse than others, some paths require meta knowledge of future events or character actions or items or whatever. the "true ending" is either analogous to the original 1863: kdj makes it to the end at the cost of everyone he loves, or hsy's modified 1863: kdj makes himself enemy of the scenario to secure a way out for the kimcom remnants.

there's branches on the choices tree where everyone dies and everything sucks and is bad forever and theres choices to make where kdj gets to make a family and they don't really get to settle down but they can get pretty close to it among the ruins of the apocalypse. through all his testing, yjh finds that these endings are nice but peter out - to get to the end of the apocalypse yjh has to claw his way there inch by painful inch, through betrayal and sacrifice, and he still cant fully get past it

i originally wanted to finagle a yoohankim 3 way swap but i couldn't figure it out. swap aus are a lot easier to work with when they're even numbers, at least to me, so this au features a ysa who is a video game company employee by day and by night she really has become god this time (and also a terrible indie dev). and this is how jungdoksang can still win !!!!

also yjh's coworker from Real Life hsy :) i haven't decided if she's like an employee for the same agency, or if she's someone else in the gaming circles that yjh interacts with sometimes (in my heart theyre in like some sort of discord server together), or something like that but she's around. whatever she does she is twitter cancelled for something. to me.

the only other character swaps are lsk and yma. yma is yjh's estranged sister (in broad strokes there's a vague bad parent situation going on here) (they used to be close until they drifted apart and slowly started hating each other [there is an abyss between them that neither of them can bridge]) (he feels that she betrayed him and threw him under the bus so he left [maybe he gets kicked out]) (she feels that he abandoned her to whatever situation they have going on [he didn't even try to take her with him]) and he has to find her when the apocalypse starts. yjh older sibling to yma gives us a whole different little dynamic to explore from kdj ysk (there's different levels of responsibility and guilt and blame when you're talking siblings that are soooooo interesting to me. sorry that i see any set of siblings and immediately try to figure out how to make them worse)

lsk is kdj's mom who appeared into existence at some point with kdj and they were both just adults. that's weird isn't it. oh well. i guess she can become a transcendent later too for funsies

everyone else stays in the same configuration of Real Person vs Character to me this is a very important aspect

this point has no precedent with the swap, nothing particular that would change to cause this, but it would be so funny if lgy was a little gamer boy who is an avid yjh hater. hates that guy. shows up to competitions to boo him. tunes into yjh's silent no-mic speedrunning streams to mald in chat but yjh +mods don't ban him bc its kinda funny.

anyways the apocalypse starts when yjh and his coworker/fellow gamer hsy are on a train to twitchcon and lgy is also there (also headed to twitchcon) and he brings bugs because he likes them but also to sabotage yjh specifically. its just funny if this happened. you understand

instead of having reader-related skills and abilities, yjh's skills are video game player based! he gets flavor text insight on people, location, and items, things like that. notably, he has the ability to reset, to bring himself back to the beginning of the apocalypse

orv swap proper follows yjh as the Player of the Game (Consumer of the Narrative) who lives hundred of lifetimes in this ruined-world-become-reality "replaying" [read: time looping through] the game to reshape it to save his fave character from self implosion (kdj with no dissociation is very prone to dying. all the time.). to revisit the idea of playing with yjh and the idea of agency, of creation, the only way to get past the apocalypse is to go off the beaten path, to choose options that weren't even there in the game. when in space, at his darkest point, yjh becomes a writer. in this story, at his darkest point, he has to become a creator too

please do not ask me how the epilogues go i dont know how the epilogues go (i don't want to throw yjh back into a train for milennia after he Just went through a thousand resets so i'm sending kdj for that but i havent fully planned how or why)

anyways, hope that helps!!! :)

#orv au #orvswap #i think i will main tag this. just the one tag tho. poorly planned au be upon ye. #orv #orv spoilers #<- for blacklists! #i only realized after creating this au that this is just how p//mmm goes except its videogame themed and hater lgy is there lol #anyways wheres that post that says time loops are about tragedy and theyre about saying i will make this right #and secret third thing time loops are about love #also each individual dynamic for the creater-player-character triangle in this is so interesting to me to explore like #you have the new kdj-yjh one (mostly similar tbh. was the crux of the au after all) which is a fun space to play in #but then you have a brand new kdj-ysa one to work with which is !!!! a writer and her character. a creator and her creation #and then you have ysa-yjh as the creator and her audience of 1!!!!!!! where is yjh that he needs to be saved? how does ysa answer that call #to love to the point of creation.... to tear the world asunder..... to create the worlds most unplayable rpg....... #lets meet again in another life. ysa reaches out toward yjh but cant reach him before she wakes up. cant quite tell him its not his fault #and Dont Even get me Started on yoo sister dynamics ill go insane #because theyre siblings but for a while (and def at the beginning of the story) it hurts to be around each other (its a betrayal #its a pang in your chest its a you were supposed to protect me and you were supposed to love me and i dont even know you anymore) #but also the swap means the 4th wall eats yma and leaves yjh begging for her back ('dont you hate her?' 'shes my little sister' #which is neither agreement nor denial but also both at once) #its ya boi #tango mango #anyways thanks for the ask im very normal about the ask

[just-spacetrash]

💔

#waaahhh feeling BAD again..... #like few months ago my friend asked if i had new years free and i ASSUMED that meant we were like planning smth together????? #and today she mentions in a GROUP CHAT that shes spendingnnew years with her bf #and like. ok. fine. good for them i guess #but i just rly wished she woulda told me like before #and it happened while i was at a Christmas party toooo.... now im sad and just not drunk enough #feeling lonely #i rly thought i had like things going up things looking good finally friends and shit #and like obviously i know her bf is the most important person to her thats how it works #but likee feels bad yk #cause apparently to her this wasnt even that big of a deal cos she didnt bother mentioning it yo be before #and i have no one #my other friends invited us both (thats how i found out) but theyre a couple too so i dont wanns go third wheeling their new years yk #i just #u think its going so well #and suddenly i just feel like ughhhh #this is cringe even writing i might delete this tomorrow when im sober and awake #but like. everyones got someone and ive been trying to click with someone for 20 fucking years #and still #:((((((((( #and like it feels bad not being anyones most important person #and like i know so many ppl are in this situation im not trying to be like wahhh my suffering is unique but like it just feels bad #very bad esp when ur tired as fuck and alone and shit #:((((( #my post #everything SUCKS!!!!!!!!!