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#and is sometimes shoved into water idk i need my fictional men as sad and pitiful as possible or else im not attracted to them anymore
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Every time somebody writes Eddie doing something super cool and sexy I have have headcanon two goblin-esque habits for him to keep it even
#eddie munson x reader#hes despicable and im in love with him and hes not sexy unless he has the energy of a weird loser who does weird off putting stuff#and is sometimes shoved into water idk i need my fictional men as sad and pitiful as possible or else im not attracted to them anymore#u say hes like a super kinky dom that gets ass all the time?#i say he hasnt washed his hair in 2 weeks and wears all those layers bc he gets cold very easily and shivers a lot#idk if anybody else is listening to taz ethersea but theres this lil guy called urchin#and he speaks in a high pitched voice and one of the first things he says is im a nasty lil freak just a wild little guy#the other day i was trying to find a thru line of like when the wretched little man becomes truly my beloved wretched little man#and i think its when they get soaked in water against their will#like a baptism of sorts#to really become the kind of character i will think about for several years#just sopping wet in their clothes on the rest of the adventure while they are touching wet denim#which is always bad#anyway#i feel like i always need to end these by saying that this is 100% genuine and said with love but i feel like if u read this far u know#i just have very specific and very bad taste in dudes#ive been rewatching some formative media lately and hoo boy every fuckin one theres like a soaking wet miserable boy#that i was fucking obsessed with#and every time im like oh yeah thats gotta be the origin#and then i see an earlier one and its that one#who was the original horrrible boy that made me this way?#wait#fuck#fuck wait i do know who it is and now i need to go lay down#fucking annakin skywalker#he and padme were my first ship my first queer crush simultaneously#and aparently absolutely instilled the deep love of sad boy cool girl within me#thats the name my friend gave it and she said it so succinctly that i needed a minute bc thats it#cool girl is also a slug woman in her own ways but shes always confident about it at least#anyway thanks ive had this blog for a week and now u know the entire history of my taste in men thanks for coming to my seminar
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