#and ive still got so many issues to sort out and boxes to tick off but like !!!!!! wtf look at me go

[phoneybeatlemania]

Is Paul a controlling/ domineering husband?

Hiya anon! This is a……complicated question, but I’ll do my best at answering it. 

In my opinion—which I know a lot of people would disagree with—I don’t think Paul is a controlling or domineering husband. Or at least, not to the degree that others seem to think he is. 

I think a lot of this opinion comes from misgivings about his marriage to Linda: that she was ‘a great mother!’ and ‘a great cook!’ and joined Wings so that her husband could continue his career (meanwhile she had to give up her own). 

And on paper, I see why this rubs of as misogynistic to people (I mean, its literally ticking the Good At Popping Out Babies, Belongs In The Kitchen and What?? Women Don’t Want Careers! stereotype boxes)—but in actual practice, I think we undervalue the amount of autonomy Linda had in this relationship. 

When Ive seen people discuss Paul and Lindas marriage, I think they generally overstate their roles as Husband and Wife. While I’m sure a lot of their marriage did pertain to whats considered Normal Gender Roles (i.e. the husbands works, the wife raises the kids), to me it seems that they both still maintained their share of independence in this marriage.

Like a lot of their behaviours don’t rub off as that odd to me—for example, that Linda became less sociable following her marriage to Paul and the birth of Mary, I don’t find to be particularly alarming. I mean, most parents will just became less sociable, because you have more responsibilities now. I also think that its entirely possible that perhaps the two of them just wanted to settle down a bit; they were both hitting their thirties, and while I’m not saying that’s ancient or anything (lol), I think it would be pretty normal for them to want to take a step back from the nightlife and the parties. To me, things like them moving to a pretty rural area in Scotland, just suggests that they wanted to relax a little (I mean, it had been a pretty weird decade for the both of them). Paul even sort of touches on this in his first interview following Lindas death:

…we both played the field quite widely. The good thing is when we got married, we told each other. That was a big decision. I thought, “Should I just kind of not say anything, and she not say anything?” But, we thought, “No. We are going to really have a relationship here. We’ve got to clear this up.” I said, “I’ve got to tell you all this stuff. I hope you really can handle this.” It was good, because she told me all of her stuff. We really did tell all of the stuff. We were painfully open about it. But it got it out the way. And it’s like, “Now we can maybe have a marriage. Maybe we now don’t need to be unfaithful.” And that was the case, which is beautiful. But I think that it was that we got it out the way. So many people marry young, and wonder what it’s like the rest of their life. So they’ve almost got to have affairs just to see what it’s like. Luckily we got all of that out of the way before we got married, which I think was another great blessing. (x)

At the same time though, Paul didn’t only recognise her as “a good mother” either. If you look at the way he speaks about Linda in interviews, I think its clear he placed a lot of value on other aspects to her, including her work as a photographer and her personality: 

“She became known as ‘Paul’s wife’, instead of the focus being on her photography. But, as time went on, people started to realise that she was the real thing. So, yeah, she eventually did get the correct reputation, but at first it was just blown out of the water by the headline-grabbing marriage.”

—Paul McCartney in interview w/ Alexis Petridis, The Guardian, 2019 (x)

He also doesn’t seem to take any issue with any of his partners Doing Their Own Thing, because he doesn’t appear to just see them as a commodity. Linda still continued her own career as a photographer, as well as in later years her animal rights activism and vegetarian cooking. Heather Mills had her own charity campaigns; and Nancy Shevell continued (perhaps continues, though Im not sure, she might have retired by now?) a career business. 

On that note, one could argue that if Paul was as obsessed with having a partner who will Abide By His Every Rule, it would be incredibly odd for him to continuously pursue relationships with women who are extremely independent. [Courtesy of @royaltyisshe64 for pointing that out to me btw, and apologies Hannah if I’m stealing any of your ideas here—its for a cause I think you’ll appreciate though lol!]. 

I also think with Linda joining Wings, while it was Pauls idea, I doubt it was something she was effectively forced to do. Maybe joining a band wasn’t her number one priority at the time, but it seems to be something she genuinely enjoyed given that she’d long had an interest in music. And I think as well, people seem to just neglect the argument that a relationship requires effort from both sides. It was never going to be the case that Everyone got Everything they wanted when it came to their careers—but I think they found a way to work well alongside each other, that allowed them both to continue pursuing their own passions and work as a team.

Even with Jane, although I’m well-aware Paul took issue with her working and don’t want to dismiss that as a problem, I still think there’s a bit more nuance to this. I don’t think the issue he took with Jane pursuing her own career was really that She’s A Woman, She Can’t Be Independent!, I think it was more that he wanted to settle down and have a family, and for him to do that, having The Wife take the backseat in terms of work would have been the social norm for the time. Which obviously, I don’t agree with the prospect of, and she gets a massive Good For Her from me for saying “fuck that!” and doing what she wanted anyway. But my point here is that, I don’t feel that Jane having her own career was the real issue for Paul. Also, while I think he wanted The Family Life, he never broke up with her because she wasn’t ready to take that next step. If he was that bothered about her not being willing to settle down immediately, Id imagine one of them would have broken the relationship off sooner. 

Now, none of this to say Paul McCartney has always been a fantastic husband, his Only Crime Was Being A Feminist, and there were absolutely no hardships involved in any of his marriages because everything was beyond perfect. There were obstacles Paul and Linda had to overcome during their marriage, and Paul has his own set of problems, that Im sure had (and maybe still have) some sort of presence in his relationships. 

But at the same time, I just don’t think its productive to argue that he was overly-controlling to his wives, or that anyone whose ever been in a relationship with him has been miserable the whole time. It just doesn’t ring true to me, and I think it completely underestimates the autonomy of all these women. 

To me it seems that when it comes to Pauls issues as a partner, its more to do with his own emotional-needs, especially if you consider that around the start of his relationships with both Linda Eastman and Heather Mills he was kind of…spiralling, to put it lightly. And while this doesn’t make for him being the perfect partner, I don’t see much evidence that suggests this translates to him being particularly controlling or domineering either.  

So essentially: yes I do think there were/are elements to Pauls relationships with women which are sexist, but I don’t think this is something that goes beyond what is pretty normalised socialisation of the sexes. Most people, especially from older generations, are going to have grown up in a home where the mother did the majority of cooking and cleaning, and the father did very little of it. And to clarify, just because this is normal doesn’t make it right either—I mean it would be great if housework was split evenly between partners. But it’s just not something that Im going to find particularly weird either. 

But on the other hand, I don’t think Paul is as bothered about having his partners following All The Normal Conventions Of Marriage. To me, its always just seemed that Paul likes the idea of having a family—but given his choice in partners (all people who had their own careers and interests), I doubt its essential for him (or even something he wants) that he has a wife whose dependant and prepared to conform to ‘the role’ of being a housewife. If he was, you’d think he’d be drawn to a very different type of personality.

#anyway *CITATION: Hannah my bff 😎* #but yeah. look. there's More that could be said about Pauls relationships with women #and I'm not trying to argue here that every choice he's ever made has been Perfect and Completely Reasonable lol #I just.......disagree with a lot of people when they argue he's Totally Controlling towards his wives #because I just don't see a lot that suggests he is? #or that like He Wants Them To Just Be Baby Making Machines #yeah. I just don't see it guys #so yeah my opinion on this #say what you will #paul and linda #pauls psyche #paul mccartney #asks #anon

[tragedyuri]

i still have some pretty bad days but this year alone i got to start going to therapy, finally get the switch that ive put off getting for years, AND my mom finally let me have cats so yea i can feel pretty awful sometimes but teen me would be so happy that i got to tick off all those boxes :,)

#brie speaks #still insane to me that at 14 i was like okay i'll go to therapy and get help when i can fund it myself and that's exactly what happened #but back then i put it off solely bc i didnt want people to know that i needed help #and ive still got so many issues to sort out and boxes to tick off but like !!!!!! wtf look at me go??? #im literally crying rn bc of how much ive grown even in just like the last two years #and im so grateful to be here!!! #idk this is so cheesy and sappy but fuck it when do i feel good about myself yknow

[normal-thoughts-official]

Ok so Camille’s an asshole on that we can all agree, but I’m really tired of people in the fandom acting like she’s just your typical annoying ex and she makes poor uwu Alec feel insecure cause fuck that. Camille was 100% abusive and manipulative but I also think she was sexually abusive too I mean seeing what she did to Simon and kissing Magnus without his consent even though he was clearly uncomfortable, consent doesn’t really seem to be an issue for her-

I feel like she definitely manipulated his fear of loneliness and not being good enough, to suit her needs. Like Magnus isn’t in the mood for sex or it’s especially triggering on a certain day, either way he’s not up for it but Camille makes him do it anyway. She threatens to leave or go find someone else who can fulfill her needs or take care of her when Magnus won’t, ‘I mean does he even love her when he won’t do this one simple thing for her?’ 

So he just lets her do what she wants, even if he’s having a full blown panic attack Camille doesn’t care or she’ll just leave insulting him saying she can’t deal with this right now and leaving Magnus with no idea when or if she’ll be back. So the next time she asks he hesitates less or initiates it more even when he’s not in the mood so she won’t leave and yeah I have a lot of emotions relating to this. and now I’m thinking about how it’ll affect his future relationships, not even talking about Alec but other people - I have this headcanon where when he got away from Camille and is healing, him ragnor and Catarina live together in ragnors cottage or somewhere away from people for awhile so Magnus can slowly heal and focus on himself and unlearn Camille’s abuse with the help of his family 

But despite what this fandom says Magnus has always been a helper and a selfless person to the point of self destruction. He’s unable to prioritise his own health and he wouldn’t be able to slow down and feel the full force of the abuse he experienced cause he feels like he’ll fall apart if he does and ‘no one wants a pathetic crybaby who breaks down when someone moves their hand too fast in his direction it wasn’t even that bad he’s just exaggerating like he always does this is why Camille doesn’t love him back’ (the ‘’ parts were meant to be strikethrough to signify Magnus’ inner thoughts but that doesn’t work on asks)

And he’s scared to get in another relationship cause he doesn’t think he’d be able to speak up for himself if they turned violent or controlling, he’s scared that if they did he’d just let them so he closes himself off from people puts these walls around him and a bright smile on his face that doesn’t let anyone think there’s anything wrong. And theres so much pain going on in the world ‘they have it much worse than him anyway’ and Magnus tries to help the best he can as he always does and he’s always there for people to lean on without any reciprocation and he’s so emotionally and physically tired and he’s not sure how much longer he can take it, almost considers going back to blackfairs bridge ‘really he’d be doing the world a favour’ but theres too many bad memories and he promised his family he would try so he holds on and then he finds Raphael and that obviously doesn’t fix everything but- I was going to continue this but it’s two am in my country and honesty it’s too long already😅 sorry for the rant it’s just a lot of emotions. Im so tired of the ‘Camille’s an annoying ex who keeps getting in the way of my favourite gay ship😠’ metas and needed to let out some feelings before I explode from my hate for Camille

UGH ANON HOW DOES IT FEEL TO BE NOT ONLY A GENIUS BUT ALSO MY NEW BEST FRIEND, AN INTELLECTUAL, AND COMPLETELY RIGHT. YOU ARE SO CORRECT!!! idk if uve read my other post that i posted while i was waiting for you but we no longer have the same hat we are SHARING the hat!! i can't believe i got this ask right after i had just made that long ass rant and was in so much need to talk about this like ugh are you my guardian angel. i love you more than anyone else ive ever met

ok ok ok coherent thoughts ok i can do this. first of all THE SALT how does it feel to have vision and coherency. ppl writing camille as just an annoying ex or a bad ex or even as like "oh they both made mistakes and it ended up terrible" drives me UP THE WALL. camille was explicitly abusive, so much so that magnus CANONICALLY WAS UNABLE TO ALLOW PEOPLE TO GET CLOSE TO HIM FOR ALMOST A CENTURY. and she was shown to be abusive, both in the physical sense as you have reminded us so brilliantly and in the sense that her whole "choose me" speech? like she doesn't have to literally say the words "no one but me would ever love you" for that to be exactly what she's saying. she's obviously playing with his insecurities and putting him down while presenting her as his savior, it's CLASSIC ABUSE. she was written as such a perfect to-the-book abuser that it honestly shocks me like they did that really all they ticked all the boxes. the way she immediately launched to talk about alec's mortality too, the way she was obviously trying to make them fight and draw them apart - it wasn't a jealousy thing, it is just that she's abusive and she wants him isolated so she can toy with him and manipulate him 

EVEN SALTIER WHEN THEY MAKE IT ABOUT ALEC BEING INSECURE LIKE. especially because canonically he literally watched camille kiss magnus and didn't care, which was sexy of him because i was dreading some jealousy drama or something but instead he was just like. obviously she did it to hurt you. i only care in the sense that she's a fucking bitch. we stan! 

as for how she treated him! oof i think the same thing with the same words dioajdsaoij it always circled back to "why can't you do this for me?" in and outside of sex - i mentioned that in a conversation in the comments of my other post but i think that with camille the sexual abuse was really just an extension of the regular abuse, so they bleed together and are not really separable in that sense. at every turn, he had to prove his worth, and she used his fear of loneliness both in the sense that she amplified it and made it seem like the only way to not be lonely was to be with her, and that she gave him just enough for him not to feel desperately lonely so she could string him along. not to mention, they both always go back to how magnus supposedly "owes" her, and yes, it's because of the bridge, of course, but there's also that underlying tone of "because she put up with him and gave him affection when no one else would". even when what she did was nowhere close to real affection. so it's both the bridge and the after. she could have saved him and left, but she stayed. that's why he feels he owes her, and she will absolutely use it

AND UR SO RIGHT ABOUT MAGNUS BEING UNABLE TO PRIORITIZE HIS OWN HEALTH UGH UGH UGH UGH like he has no choice for a while because she left him fucking broken and seeing the way she treats him and the amount of shit he puts up with i can only imagine how far she had to go for him to reach a breaking point and leave her for real. but as soon as he could pretend to have himself together he just threw himself out there. and i believe that he felt guilty for having catarina and ragnor take care of him when he abandoned them because of camille - obviously that's not what happened, she manipulated him into staying away from them, made his life hell whenever he wanted to hang out with them until he no longer had the energy to put up a fight to keep in contact with the people he loves, but it's what he feels that happened, and most likely what camille herself eventually started to tell him happened once they had been pulled away enough. ("you're gonna leave me? and go back to who? your little friends who tried to pit you against me from day one? they're just gonna say 'i told you so', magnus. and why would they take you back when you left them before? when was the last time you even saw them? you chose this, you chose me, and now you're gonna come back to them and expect them to welcome you with open arms? you selfish little prick")

AND RAPHAEL!!! raphael was so important, honestly, we say that magnus didn't let anyone into his heart but obviously raphael was the exception and EXTREMELY important for his healing. it's a complicated relationship because he's sort of a father figure for rapha, and as such, he doesn't allow himself to be completely vulnerable around him, because that's not "his role". but! he was the first person whom magnus let in. and they obviously know each other deeply ("i hate to see you like this" even though magnus looked completely put together to the outside eye) and are plenty affectionate ("sweet boy", the hugs, the way rapha talked about magnus with so much love and awe in his eyes and voice) and trusting (the way raphael went to magnus' loft, not his own damn clan, when he was tortured...). i know this fandom likes to pretend that they pretend to hate each other but NO THEY DON'T they are openly caring and loving with each other fucking fight me on this

anyway, my point is that raphael was the first person he allowed himself to trust, and of course, part of that is simply because raphael was vulnerable and in need and like you said he can't just stay still when he sees someone struggling. but to care for raphael eventually had to mean to open up to him and when he welcomed raphael in, he gained a new member to his family. raphael is his kid. that's no small thing. their bond goes deep and it's extremely important because again, after camille magnus wouldn't allow people to get close to his heart, because he was scared of how they could use that against him. raphael was his first, and the only reason magnus was able to open himself up for romantic love again (which was an extra step, not because romantic love is more important or deeper, but because it's specifically the kind of love that camille used against him, and thus it makes him even more scared) was because he had already been relearning trust and platonic love with rapha

rapha did him good!!! there's a reason he calls him "sweet boy" okay. and rapha cares about him and he NOTICES WHEN HE'S IN A BAD SHAPE EVEN THROUGH ALL OF MAGNUS' WALLS and he specifically didn't want magnus involved with the camille drama even when it had obviously gotten out of hand because he wanted to keep him safe and away from her!!! i want to be shot in the face!!! they love each other so much! fuck!

and also that implies that raphael knows about camille which means he might be the first person who met magnus post-camille and heard the story, which means that he might be (and probably is) the first person who was never involved that magnus opened up about this to. if that ain't some powerful and important shit i don't know what is. because part of abuse is that you can't talk about it - there's this sense of shame and guilt both from staying and from not staying more, especially because magnus canonically still feels like he owes her... aaaaa

this answer is all over the place im sorry but my point is you are correct, camille is a textbook abuser not just a shitty ex, she fucked up his head and made him unable to open up for a long time, and the first person that helped him break those walls was raphael and they LOVE EACH OTHER VERY MUCH AND DEEPLY thank you for your attention

#magnus bane #shadowhunters #sh #meta #magnus bane meta #camille belcourt is an abuser #long post #ask #anonymous #camille's trash party #brotp: i'll do whatever it takes to protect them

[belovedrival]

“It’s Jonas.”

It’s been almost six months but I did say I would talk about my experience, so here goes...

(It’s really long, I started this draft when Jonas was three months old)

I was told that I would be induced on March 10, a Wednesday. My due date was the 17th but baby had been measuring large for months so my doctor just wanted to go ahead with it. I agreed. We’d made it to 39 weeks and that was good. Plus, I felt huge and just...done with being pregnant. 

I worked (from home) on the 10th. It felt sort of surreal, knowing that we’d be at the hospital at 5 pm that evening, but I knew I needed to work to keep my mind off what was coming. For a while, at least. 

We’d started packing the hospital bags for weeks before. I’d left my suitcase open next to the bed and I’d throw things in there whenever I’d do laundry or think of something else I wanted to take. I sort of knew then that I was majorly overpacking (and in hindsight it’s laughable how much stuff I never wore/used) but at least we were prepared, right?

Yeah, about that...

Mister drove to the hospital. Since I was being induced, it wasn’t any frenetic, movie scene type, panicked dad experience. We just put our things in the car and drove there. On the way we talked about how strange it was, knowing that when we came home (God willing), there would be a baby in the car seat. Of course at that time we still didn’t know if our baby was a girl or boy.

(Mister told me later that he was almost certain baby was a boy. He said he’d heard too many nurses/medical personnel ‘slip’ while we were having ultrasounds and whatnot.)

People can choose to find out or not, but it puts a whole other dimension on the experience when you don’t know in advance. Just my two cents.

As we turned into the hospital parking lot, Mister told me to open the glove box. “There’s something for you in there,” he said. I opened it, trying to swallow the bowling ball that had lodged itself in my throat.

“Oh!” I said. “What I always wanted - an owner’s manual!”

When I’m nervous, I often joke.

There was a small white box next to the owner’s manual. In it was a necklace with an aquamarine pendant; one of the birthstones for March. Of course I cried.

We took an obligatory selfie before going inside the hospital. After getting checked in, we went to our room. I remember thinking that we’d only be in that room probably a day, and that 24 hours later, we’d be upstairs post delivery.

Ha. Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha!!!!

I was given a drug to start labor (not pitocin). I’ve always hated needles and so getting an IV was not part of my top 100,000 Things I Love to Do List. Thankfully, the nurse who put it in was really good, so I barely felt anything. 

The one major memory of this whole experience (other than Jonas, of course) was how good the nurses were. I am forever grateful to them. 

Other than the IV and monitors, Mister having to sleep on the sofa, and me laying on a hospital bed, we could almost trick ourselves into imagining we were staying at some sort of hotel. Almost. For a few hours, anyway.

Wednesday night into Thursday morning was okay. I was feeling persistent pain. It wasn’t terrible, just uncomfortable, and I knew that it was part of the process. I didn’t sleep great but I was able to get some rest.

Around six o’clock there was a shift change, and my nurse for the day came in. Liz had a kind of cheerleader vibe about her, very positive, and in some other circumstances I might’ve found her annoying. But I liked her.

My doctor came in a little after seven and broke my water. That experience was...weird. I mean, it was a new experience for me, so it’s hard to describe. Uh, water is wet, so it was wet? Honestly, the thing I remember the most is that there was some meconium after Doc broke my water, which worried me a little. Baby was doing fine and no one seemed super worried, so I set it aside. I DID think it meant I was guaranteed to have the baby that day. How wrong I was, and not for the first time...

They gave me pitocin after my water was broken. So my contractions increased. It felt more like strong period cramps to me. I should say at this point that I have a high pain tolerance. I don’t know what the same level of contractions would feel like to someone else. Sometimes I was only mildly aware that I was having them. 

Probably one of the most annoying things about my entire experience Wednesday/Thursday/into Friday was not being allowed to eat anything. I had ice chips, and water, and Liz managed to get me some Jello. This was actually something of an issue, because I had gestational diabetes, so at first nobody wanted to give me anything except for sugar-free Jello. I did have some of that, but as the day wore on and there wasn’t much progress, Liz talked to somebody and got me some regular Jello. I would’ve preferred something else, but Jello was what I was allowed, so Jello I got.

I...don’t really like Jello. Seriously, like if it’s the only thing, I’ll eat it, but...yeah.

The hours ticked by. Progress was slow. At first I looked forward to Liz and the other nurses coming in and checking me, but by late afternoon, it was clear that things were slooooooow. The best part of Thursday was sometime in the afternoon Liz suggested bouncing on the ball. I was really happy to get out of bed and bounce for a while. After doing that, I decided it was time for the epidural.

I’d decided beforehand I wanted an epidural. As I said, I absolutely hate needles, but I also didn’t want my body to be so stressed that labor couldn’t progress. In the back of my mind, I also thought that if the situation changed, and a c-section became necessary, the epidural would already be in place. 

After the epidural was put in, I started shaking on the edge of the bed, tears rolling down my face. Liz was still holding on to me, and Mister was there, and they both asked what was wrong. I couldn’t speak for a minute. It felt a little like I was five years old, still terrified of that darn needle, and all the tension I’d suppressed had to get out somehow.

“It’s okay,” Liz said, giving me a hug. Sometimes that’s all that’s needed. I was sorry to see her go when her shift ended. She said she was working again on Saturday and that she’d stop by to see us after the baby was born, to see what we were having. (She did stop by.)

This was a constant refrain from most of the nurses: upon first coming into the room, and looking at the white board that had my information and seeing next to “Baby” was written “Surprise!!” we inevitably got the question, “You don’t know what you’re having? That’s awesome!” 

Getting the epidural made the pain diminish, but it also made things more complicated for me because I couldn’t move. Overnight, a tag team of nurses turned me one way and the other, and checked me. 

(I should also mention that all of the staff at the hospital had already been vaccinated, and they all wore masks into the rooms. We did not have to wear masks in the room, but if we went outside it, they were required.)

By Thursday night, both Mister and I were feeling rather discouraged. All day Thursday we’d been told that baby would come “by the afternoon”, then “by the evening”, and then late Thursday, “by Friday morning”. Bear in mind that I’d been on an IV/ induced since roughly six pm on Wednesday. 

Maybe this sounds laughable to people who’ve had 72 hour long labors, but I’d been mentally prepared for around 24 hours of labor. My twin sister had been induced with her first, and her labor had gone about that long. Around midnight on Thursday I was feeling pretty discouraged. Mister wasn’t angry but he said (when we were alone) that he felt like the staff had been overly optimistic. I just don’t think either of us had thought about the implications of me being induced without any sign of active labor. In hindsight, I was glad it was done then, but...yeah. Not being mentally prepared for that long of a labor was hard. I felt bad for everyone who was waiting on updates; it felt like literally nothing happened for about thirty hours. Like I think was dilated to five by Friday morning. And effaced? Practically nothing. My cervix wasn’t getting thinner at all.

Early Friday morning, a new nurse started her shift. My first impressions of Diana were...well, I thought, “she’s definitely not as friendly as Liz.” She was more brusque. As I hadn’t slept much Thursday night, and having been in the same situation for over a day, I didn’t care nearly as much about making friends. By that point I was tired - physically, mentally, emotionally.

But Diana was awesome. She got me turned onto my hands and knees, and had me start doing some vigorous exercises, to really move labor along. I was fine with doing whatever she said because I was REALLY ready to be done. So it felt a little like my cross country days in high school, at the finish of a difficult race. I was tired, I wasn’t sure how much I could do physically, but we had a GOAL and dammit, we were going to do everything to get there!

By late morning, even after the exercises, I was still dilated at a five. Hardly effaced at all. After checking me again, Diana left the room. The option of a c-section had been discussed, especially since it was over 24 hours since my water had been broken.

“I think I’m done,” I said to Mister. Even though I’d never really been 100% ‘I want a natural birth experience’, it felt a little like giving up. I started crying again. “I just don’t think this [natural labor] is going to work. I’m done.”

“If you’re done, that’s it,” Mister said. “Tell Diana you want a c-section.”

I have to say something here about Mister. Even though he kept saying he didn’t know what he was doing or how he should support me, he was AWESOME. He supported every decision, and listened to me talk about the different options. For as hard as labor was for me, I think he had a different hard time. All he could do was literally sit there and watch me go through pain and doubt and fear, and comfort me as best he could. He was a great comfort.

(This is why even if thoughtful partners don’t think they’re doing a good job at supporting laboring moms, they most likely are. Their presence is invaluable. For anyone who doesn’t have a supportive partner with them, or an absent one, my profound condolences.)

When Diana came back in, I told her I wanted a c-section. This was around 11 o’clock Friday morning, March 12th. “I agree,” she said right away, patting me on the shoulder. “You’ve done everything you possibly can to get this baby delivered naturally. I trust mom’s instincts on this.”

Her support meant so much. Really, when a veteran nurse says they trust your instinct, how can you not feel better about your decision?

She left to contact my doctor and several other people, and Mister let people know what was going on. At that point I was more relieved that soon it would be over. I wanted to see our baby.

Mister said later that he learned that hospitals have two speeds: 1) we’re in no rush; and 2) something is going to happen NOW. While my c-section wasn’t an emergency, once the decision was made, things did happen fast. Diana brought the anesthesiologist into the room so he could numb me up. As I already had the epidural, this didn’t take very long. After a few minutes of letting the medication work, Bryce asked if I could feel my toes.

“No,” I said. It was weird. I knew I shouldn’t feel them, but I couldn’t help saying, “I’m trying to wiggle them!”

“No, no, it’s good you can’t feel them,” both Bryce and Mister said. I was wheeled out of the labor room a few minutes after that (I was not sorry to leave it) and taken to the OR. Mister went with someone else to take our stuff to the recovery room.

I’ve been in operating rooms before. They aren’t places that make me want to stay there. Bright lights, metal everywhere, many thoughts of what could go wrong...although I will say that all the staff in the OR made me feel confident. I was glad to see my doctor. 

I felt better once I was in the OR (the only time in my life I’ve ever felt that way) but it felt like a long time until Mister arrived in there. He’d gone with a member of staff as they took all our stuff to a recovery room, then been taken to the OR. Once he was in place, everything started.

Doctor M had asked me before Mister arrived if he wanted to ‘announce’ was the baby was. I told her that he most likely would, but to ask him. She did, and he said yes, he’d love to do that.

There was a blue sheet in front of me so I really couldn’t see anything that went on - which was PERFECTLY FINE with me.

Obviously, I was flat on my back, and everything below my chest was numb. The doctor and others asked me at various times if I felt anything, and I didn’t (other than tugging and pulling). At one point, I suddenly smelled the unmistakable scent of something burning. “What is that? That burning smell?” I asked, glancing above me (really, behind me) at Bryce, who stood there.

“I’ll tell you later,” he said.

Which immediately told me I didn’t want to know what it was. 

Yeah, it was me burning, while the medical staff cauterized me, keeping me from bleeding to death.

(The fact that cesarean sections are major surgery, and regularly happen every day in the United States, is, frankly, a miracle. Everyone hears about the horror stories when something goes wrong, but considering the number of women who go through them without incident, we as a society completely take them for granted.)

As the tugging and pulling continued, and Doctor M said things like, “there’s the head”, the sense of anticipation increased. I’ve never felt anything like it before. Both Mister and I knew any moment we would meet our baby, and after waiting 39 weeks (and eight years before that), it was almost unbearable.

Doctor M said, “Here’s the baby!”

I heard a slight cry, and I looked up at Mister, who sat on my right, holding my hand. He looked down at me and said, “It’s Jonas.”

Even thinking about that moment now brings tears to my eyes. In knowing Mister almost eleven years, I’ve only seen him cry maybe five times. Including this year, on March 12th. We both were bawling, and laughing at the same time, as Jonas VERY loudly screamed his disapproval at being evicted from his warm, cozy space. At one point, Mister, laughing as he cried said, “One of the ---s (our last name) needs to stop crying in here!”

He has a rather husky cry, Jonas does. I loved his cry from the moment I first heard it (though I don’t actually like to hear him cry, if that makes any sense).

As I was sewn up, Mister moved his chair over to where our baby was, under a heat lamp. Then he brought Jonas over to me. My first thought was, he’s HUGE. My second thought was, he was the most beautiful baby I’d ever seen.

He weighed nine pounds, five ounces at birth, and had a fifteen inch head circumference. After I heard that, I knew a natural birth was never going to happen. He was born on Friday the 12th of March, at 1:14 pm. The digital clock on the wall said 13:14, which I thought was cool. And it made it a bit easier to remember the time :)

He had lots of dark hair, which I loved. My sister’s had bald babies, so it was nice to have a different-looking kid. Over the last few months, his hair almost entirely disappeared due to cradle cap, and is coming back in...blond. Genetics!

I can say now that it’s past, that I was more afraid during pregnancy than I could admit to anyone, even Mister. I have always been a worrier, and finally being pregnant after so many years, and being high risk due to my age (and my shunt, and the gestational diabetes...) I was in almost constant worry of something going wrong. First of miscarriage (no one needed to tell me of the statistics regarding older mothers), then of stillbirth, like the cord getting wrapped around baby’s neck, and death happening before delivery could happen. I have heard of at least two different stories of that happening to pregnant women in the ninth month - friends of friends of mine - and the fear of that, or something else equally catastrophic happening was, at times, almost crippling. I would’ve preferred to have never been pregnant at all rather than suffer a miscarriage or stillbirth. 

Perhaps it sounds childish, but mentally I didn’t think I was strong enough to have the dream of motherhood dashed, when every day of pregnancy brought that dream closer. I was (and still am) too much of a realist to ignore the statistics; I couldn’t pretend I was 22 and have a blissfully ignorant uneventful pregnancy. To this day, even after giving birth to a healthy baby, one of the biggest things that will set me off is the assumption that way too many people have. “We’re planning on getting pregnant soon.” “Just have kids, you’ll understand.” “I can take you out and make one just like you.” [a redneck phrase I’ve heard being said to a misbehaving child]

Not many of us can “plan” on getting pregnant exactly when we want to - or even within a year’s time. Not all of us can “just have kids” - they’re not like going to the store and getting a gallon of milk. (I recognize the privilege of living in a society where going to the store and expecting fresh milk can also sound arrogant to those who don’t live in one.) ‘Take out’ a kid (even said in jest), and ‘make another one’? I MIGHT have another child in the next couple years. More likely, I won’t. Not all of us can just get pregnant at the drop of a hat. (That’s assuming the one wanting to get pregnant even has a male partner or sperm donor at the ready...some never find that person to have a child with. And adoption can be a great thing, but not everyone is cut out for it. Shaming infertile and childless people for not wanting to adopt is disgusting.)

I was open with my OB-GYN about my fears during pregnancy and she referred me to several resources, and monitored me for PPD. My best friend’s son died in March 2020, a year before Jonas was born (though Billy had severe disabilities which made his death a certain thing), and my sister had had a stillborn son in August 2019 (my nephew Christian). So Jonas being born healthy was a huge relief for me. I can’t really describe the relief, except to say that as much physical weight I gained during pregnancy, letting go of the weight of the worry was felt even more deeply than losing the pounds since his birth (and I’ve haven’t lost all of that).

I will probably always worry about *something*, when it comes to Jonas. He gave me a scare earlier this week, rolling off the couch before I could catch him. He’s fine...and the incident scared me more than it scared him. But every day since he was born is a reminder of the gift he is, and I hope I never lose sight of that, even on the frustrating days (and there have been those over the last almost six months, and there will be more to come).

If you ever wanted children, and are fortunate enough to have them, cherish them. Be grateful for them, even when they drive you up the wall. Even when you only want three minutes’ peace, and they won’t give it to you. Love them anyway. I try to.  

#this was heavier than i thought it would be #don't get me wrong #i had a good experience overall #nurses are awesome #nurses #hospital #birth #birthday #march 12 #jonas #2021 #life #real life #family #me and mister #mister #he's great #pregnancy #parenthood

[gdelgiproducer]

DOTV AU: An Exercise in Alternate History (Part VIII)

Parts I, II, III, IV, V, VI, and VII offer more detailed context. (To briefly sum up why these posts are happening: alt history – as in sci fi, not “alternative facts” – buff, one day got the idea that DOTV could have turned out hella different if Jim Steinman looked for a star lead in other places, decided to reason out how that might work.) This is still getting a good response, so I’m gonna keep the train rolling.

Parts of the AU timeline established so far:

Instead of stopping at recording two songs from Whistle Down the Wind on a greatest hits compilation, Meat Loaf wound up taking more of an interest in Steinman’s new theater work than he did in our timeline, and through a series of circumstances found himself volunteering to play Krolock in the impending DOTV when Jim poured out his woes to him about needing to find some sort of star to attract investors. At a loss for any better ideas, Jim accepted Meat’s impulsive proposal, but not without resistance from his manager, David Sonenberg, who proposed Michael Crawford as an alternate candidate. Through quick thinking on Meat’s part, and inspiration on Jim’s, Crawford left the room accepting an entirely different role than he walked in hoping to get, leaving Krolock still open for Meat.

There was a brief speed bump, when Meat disliked Jim’s English script for the show, but after meeting with the original German author Michael Kunze and convincing Jim to compromise, things were on the road to being back on track… at least until 9/11 occurred.

Following a brief hiatus, everyone involved met to re-assess their options. The current game-plan was to put the new script on paper, schmooze with potential investors or producers, and put together a new creative team. Preferably not all at the same time, but with the crunch on, they’d do whatever needed to be done.

Schmoozing went well, but everybody that Meat, Jim, and the crew wanted to be involved was tentative. The conclusion reached was that they needed to show them there was a working show, which resulted in a concert of selections from the score paid for by none other than Courtney Love (!) that received some in-depth press coverage.

Now we join our heroes as new wrinkles emerge in the path to Broadway.

A week after the concert of selections from Dance of the Vampires (and after Michael Riedel noting that Meat Loaf has yet to sign on the dotted line for the show), a brief story appears in Rolling Stone’s Random Notes section: “Rocker Meat Loaf announced this week that he has terminated the management services of Allen Kovac and is currently seeking new representation. Kovac, who is in the process of leaving Left Bank Management to form his own firm, issued the following statement which is believed to be a comment on the heavyset singer’s departure, though he is not mentioned by name: ‘I don’t tell artists what they want to hear, I tell them what I know to be true. When I first sign an artist I let them know that I’m not their friend. Too many artists don’t measure their manager on their performance; they measure them on how many times they’ve been invited to their house. That’s not my style. If an artist is going to be successful, you need to tell them how to run their business -- not ask them how to run their business. Does it work? Look it up: no artist has ever done better after leaving my company.’” Requests from the Vampires team to speak to Meat about what’s up are met with total radio silence.

Meanwhile, the business side of Vampires continues to shore up. Jim Steinman receives delighted reports from his manager, David Sonenberg, that Jerry Weintraub and the Weisslers are ready to commit, bumping the total number of producers thus far up to nine. “How’s it looking now?” Jim queries. “Well, remember we’re trying to raise 15 million,” says David. “I don’t mean to be pessimistic, but it will be an uphill battle.” “What else is new in the theater?” Steinman grumbles in response. “On the bright side, we can now tighten the list of how many producers we need to seven.”

The representatives from Concerts West, based in L.A., get back to them within the week. Reports Sonenberg to all parties by e-mail: “They’re interested, but only if it tours. Live touring events are what they do, and the theatrical market is something they haven’t explored; they’d be more comfortable with a national tour than a Broadway run, it’s more similar to what they do at a nuts-and-bolts level.” A decision is ultimately reached by quorum to make Concerts West’s involvement in a national tour contingent on investing in the Broadway run first, and the counter-offer is duly sent their way.

As the business side shores up, the creative side is beginning to percolate as well. Meetings are had with John Rando, the Urinetown director who attended the concert and spoke very enthusiastically about the show in Riedel’s column. He’s very excited about the chance to work on the show, both to work with David Ives again (having done numerous shows at Encores! together, he feels working with David will be really special and help focus the play) and especially to work with Meat. “I’d get to hear him sing every day,” Rando enthuses. “That’s a blessing. Can you imagine that? Every single day of your life you get to hear that voice.” He also ticks the right boxes when it comes to the commercial appeal of the piece and how it meshes with his vision for the show: “It’s such a different reality. It’s silly and fun and kind of glamorous, too. These vampires sort of pull you in and you find you’re turned on by them, too! It’s a wonderful, Gothic playground.” When asked for suggestions for a choreographer, and more specifically if they should ask his choreographer on Urinetown, John Carrafa, to be a part of the show, Rando is mildly hesitant but mostly enthusiastic. Jim is admittedly happiest when it comes to Rando’s assessment of how much creative control he should be allowed to have: “Look, Jim, what are you worried about? It’s your baby! You’ve been working on it forever! The quality, the tone, the ideas, the music... this play is all you! You’d be very much a part of it.”

More progress is made when a new set designer is engaged: David Gallo. Jim immediately likes him instinctively, when, upon meeting him for the first time, Gallo stops the interview process dead. “I have two things to tell you before we continue. Number one: I’m probably the only set designer in America who still subscribes to Heavy Metal Magazine. Number two: I bought Bat Out of Hell because I saw the album cover artwork and decided I had to have it before I even heard the music.” This is no idle compliment, considering the album cover was conceived by Steinman and executed by Richard Corben... and a sequence very similar to the events depicted on the cover forms the shape of one of Vampires’ opening scenes. His sample sketches of the sets are surprisingly atmospheric as well.

The more things shape up on the creative end, however, the more everyone on the business side of the table nervously eyes the chair where Meat Loaf should be. Since his firing of Kovac, who was more a hindrance than a help so is not really missed, he hasn’t said word one to anybody. Irving Azoff, widely proclaimed the biggest agent in the world, who attended the concert and may be interested in the show, is sending them queries about who is managing Meat now, hinting that he has his eye on Meat as a client. But nobody knows what’s going on with him. When he is finally able to get him on the phone, Jim pleads with Meat to see him, one on one if need be. Meat agrees.

The scene: Le Bar Bat, in Hell’s Kitchen on West 57th. Only 9 years prior, Steinman had conducted an interview for Bat Out of Hell II at this very establishment, celebrating his and Meat Loaf’s long-awaited reunion. Plastic bats still hang from the ceiling, and the bar is still sparsely attended. A deafening fusion group still plays a seemingly endless set. Steinman greets them, as per tradition, with a cheery “fuck off!” as they finish a tune. Meat sits alone in a booth, awaiting Jim’s arrival. He rummages through his CBS Records holdall, his shoulder juddering as if it were a pneumatic drill. His graying hair could do with a shampoo. Finally, he finds what he is seeking: a couple of throat lozenges, which he pops. “Jimmy, I don’t think I can do the show.” Immediately Jim’s heart is in his throat: “WHAT?!?” “What we’re about to do is insane! Lunatic. Totally insane. We’re just gonna go out there in front of everybody with our pants down!” Jim, searching for a way to respond, can only come out with “Think of it as a character-building experience! It’ll be amazing!”

“Have you read what your fans are saying about this on the Internet? They’re saying you should be sticking aside all the old, fat guys named after a dinner dish! ‘Get rid of Meat Loaf.’ They don’t want to see me do this!” “Now, Meat, come on. You know better than to buy into their bullshit. If I believed what I read on the Internet about anything I should do, I’d never get anything done. You’re going to be glad that you stuck with it.” “Well... we need to go out of town first. New York is the hardest when it comes to people being critical. We’re gonna be judged. A lot.” “Meat, you know we can’t afford to do that. Besides, every musical that you’ve done on Broadway has opened cold in New York. I like having the preview audience be the New York audience. There’s no BS -- they’re right there telling you what you need to fix. It’s great.”

Meat heaves a sigh: “Jimmy, I’ll be honest with you; I’m more tired now than I was when Amanda was two months old!” “Meat, listen to me. We have a lot of time. We’re gonna work very hard and very slowly. I know you’re not good at dealing with change, but you really have to stay focused and believe in the project.” “But Jimmy, it’s huge! It’s got to be one of the biggest shows on Broadway right now without even opening yet. And there’s still so much to work out.”

“What happened to Allen?” “He never believed in the show. You saw what happened when he kept the door open for Night of the Proms. After the concert, I called him to ask why he wasn’t there, and he said to me, ‘Y’know, an album and a tour are still possibilities, so why not do that instead? At least you know that will sell.’ We got into it pretty hard, and he called our show garbage. He said I did better off away from you, and that if I did this album and the tour, I could retire, or I could come back afterwards if you wanted to talk Bat III, but he was adamant that I was not doing this show. It became pretty clear to me that it was going to come down to either you or him.” Jim, touched, perhaps even a little misty-eyed: “And you chose me?” “As if I had a choice! Jim, you’re my brother. I love you... more than you’ll ever know.” 

A beat of silence, awkward, emotional, and then... “Irving Azoff liked the concert.” “Yeah?” “He keeps calling us. I think he wants to sign you, and he wants to do the show too. Wouldn’t it be nice to have a manager who was on the same page?” “...will it get him to produce if I sign with him?” “I dunno. Maybe?” “I’ll give him a call. What else is going on?” Jim proceeds to update him on everything going on with the show, culminating in the reminder that they have a meeting with John Carrafa coming up to decide his suitability to the choreographic duties. “Can I count on you to be there?” “Jim, I’m signing the contract for a year, manager or no manager.  If we’re fortunate enough to run, that’s how long I’ll be here. And then I’ll be in a nursing home, no doubt!” For the first time all night, both men laugh. A rosy future may well be in sight.

TO BE CONTINUED!

[letsimportanttreecollection-blog]

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I know it all depends, but I'm talking on average, I live in the Manchester area and I've heard it depends on your area aswell?""

Do I HAVE to pay for insurance if im not driving but have a license?

My mom is trying to tell me and my brother (who is 19 and I will be 18 in about a month which is when i will get my license) that we cant get a license unless we have money to buy insurance. I think its really f***ed up for a student who got a license and doesnt drive any vehicle has to pay for insurance. She says that once i get my license, the insurance company will force her to put me on her plan so i can be insured. I think its a load of sh*t. I have never heard of anyone being forced to have insurance when they dont drive. When i say dont drive i mean, when i get my license, i wont be driving until I get my own car. Please dont respond to my situation and how i should deal with it, just tell me if thats even possible for the insurance to do that.""

What will happen if my wife gets pregnant and we dont' have health insurance?

They can't refuse prenatal care can they? Would we have $40,000 in medical bills? What would happen? We aren't poor, we just have horrible insurance through both of our workplaces.""

If a health insurance company can't deny my pre-existing condition...?

Why should I buy insurance at all?

What is the best car insurance company out there today?

I'm gonna get a car soon and I'm having difficulty picking an exact car insurance company to insure my car so I just wanted to read others opinion on what car insurance they think is the best.....if availabe tell me the pros & cons....

How can I get the best quote for a car insurance in the UK?

I have just bought a car, but I haven't driven since I moved to London, 5 years ago. I am doing a research on-line to get the best quote, but they all seem to be a bit pricey. Does anybody know a telephone number in the UK where a person (rather than a machine!) can find the best deal? I am tired of websites such as moneysupermarket, as you end up having to contact companies individually... Any help would be greatly appreciated as I would like to bring the car home today!! Many thanks in advance!!""

What is the cheapest auto insurance for young drivers?

With your experiences with auto insurance, whats been the cheapest you've had or knew someone had. I'm 20 with a 2001 Mazda Protege LX 2.0L in NYS""

What is the cheapest auto insurance in general/in NM?

I feel like i'm paying too much for auto insurance (i have aaa) what other insurnce cold I get that will be the cheapest, I don't drive my car all that much, I just want the cheapses rather than nothing.""

How much does insurance cost for?

Hi! I'm a 16 year old male that lives in Kentucky, and i'm getting a truck soon, it would be my first vehicle. Its going to be a mid 90s or late 80s truck. I'm wanting to know how much insurance would cost on average? Any help would be greatly appreciated.""

How much would i pay for car insurance? Estimate?

I know that it depends on a lot of factors but can you estimate how much i would pay for car insurance on a monthly basis - I am 18 years old - will be driving either a 1999 or 2000 model - will be attending college after the summer - clear background - this will be my first car - I live in a very wired and exotic place called MARYLAND

Looking for a online site to get cheap car insurance quote from all carriers at once?

Looking for a online site to get cheap car insurance quote from all carriers at once?

Which is the best Home Loan insurance?

Hi, i have taken Home loan of Rs. 10 Lac from HDFC. and want to protect my loan through insurance. can any body tell me that , which is the best home loan insurance plan or policy. HDFC recommend to me its own HDFC ERGO for home loan. is it best for me or any ohter option to chosse me. Please advice. LK Sharma""

How much will my insurance and maintenance costs be affected by what type of car I get?

I'm about to be 18 and am planning on getting my first car soon. I've been driving for almost 3 years in my parents' cars but need my own for heading off to college and such. I don't know what type of car I want to get, but it's gotta be cheap, old and used, preferably up to $6,000-7,500 at the absolute max. The problem is that I've been really into cars for most of my life and would rather have something a little nicer to start, I mean within the same price range but for example a Mustang, Mitsubishi 3000GT, BMW 3- or 5-Series, etc., rather than the usual Civic or Camry (not that I'd mind one of them either). The problem is that I'm worried the insurance will be way more expensive. The latest quote my dad got was a few weeks ago and it was quite a bit lower than I expected, only like $560/yr., but that was with their old '93 Taurus GL. Will having a sports car or more high-end car affect it really dramatically or will it not make that big a difference as long as my driving record stays good? Also, how much more does it cost to maintain and repair a car like a used BMW than it does just a normal car like an Accord? I've always heard that European cars in particular can be temperamental and finicky if not maintained properly, so I'm just worried that I won't have the money and know-how to have and keep a car like that as my first car.""

What is full coverage auto insurance?

What counts as full coverage auto insurance in California? Thanks!

""Car accident, insurance rate?""

ive been driving 2 years, no tickets, no accidents....so tonight i got in an accident, rear ended a car....my fault,,,how much will my insurance go up? i have Allstate.""

What's the cheapest motorcycle insurance for a 17 year old owning a motorcycle and holding a Motorcycle L....?

Learner's permit and no DL in viriginia? Serious answers only please. I want to be the only person on the insurance.

Livingston Manor New York Cheap car insurance quotes zip 12758

Livingston Manor New York Cheap car insurance quotes zip 12758

Is it possible to get Mexican insurance (not tourist) for US plated car ?

I have a US plated car (calif plates) not currently registered in the US, Not currently insured in the US. I am in mexico on FM2. Car has been here for over 4 yrs with temp permit. Is it possible to get insurance in mexico? For tourist policy I have been told car must have current US registration and insurance, For mexican policy I have been told need to have mex plates. Anyone with US plates been able to get Mexican insurance (not tourist) for their currenlty unregistered un insured US vehicle in mexico? If so what is your insurance company. Thanks""

Has anyone ever had short term car insurance ?

how much is it ? i work alot in the summer so i only need a car for a month please help am new to this.

Is it Ok to buy insurance for me and let other people buy the car?

It is cheap to buy me insurance, so I am just wondering if I can buy the insurance and let other people to drive the car.""

What is the positive & negetive aspect of Term insurance?

Why insurance agent do not show interest towards term insurance. Why they insist on ULIP only.

Can I buy triple a auto insurance with a permit? California?

So due to curtain circumstances, I need to get my own auto insurance, the catch is that I only have a permit. what I wanted to know is if a major insurance company, like triple a, would cover me, if so would it cost more than a newly licensed person, and if not does anyone know a minor insurance company that would.""

Are Honda's usually expensive on insurance?

Also what are some good looking cars that arn't to bad with insurance (I know that it all depends but still) oh and we have geico, thanks!""

Why are insurance companies such bastards?

I could never figure out why people screw their insurance companies when they can. Well now I know. They are a bunch of ethic-less, principle-less bastards. So go for it, screw them when you can for all you can. You can be assured they will do it to you first wether you are honest or not.""

How much is the insurance for a '01 pontiac firebird?

i wanted t know how much the insurance is for a teen on a '01 firebird?

Car insurance for a 19 year old?

Ok about a few Weeks ago I was involved in a wreak, I had no license and was not under my parents insurance. Luckily i didn't go to jail cause I was rear ended. Now I'm attempting to get A drivers license after SO long I've been begging for one, The only thing that's held me back from getting one was my parents because they said i would be tagged on into the insurance, and that I had to go under another address. Now after the wreak they said I cant get one, because once the insurance finds out im driving, they'll automatically add me on, is this true? I want to get back on the road and walking is pretty bad knowing i have a car ive been paying for the [ast two years for. BTW I live in Texas and under state farm.""

What is the cheapest way to get car insurance?

i passed my driving test yesterday and am looking at buying my first car but no matter what car i go fo i always get quoted around 3500 but i just cant afford that. does anyone know of any companies that specialise in young or new drivers insurance? and i would prefer less than 2000 lol xx

Will my car insurance rates go up?

A year ago, I got into an accident that was my fault. My insurance rates went up. Recently they dropped but at school, I was pulling out of a parking space and I ran into another girl's car. Will my insurance rates go up if she put in a claim? If so, how much. Any thoughts? What should I do?""

How much is car insurance on a Nissan 350z?

How much is car insurance on a Nissan 350z?

Insurance same day proof?

i was pulled over on he 1-9-2008 the same day i received the insurance went to court thought it was done i recevied a paper from the bmv in ohio asked for my insurance sent it to them 2 weeks later was sent another letter insurance same day proof for my insurance company faxed that to them they faxed it back should i had insurance 1-9-2008-6-9-2008(changed insurance companies)my insurance company signed it i sent it to the bmv that apparently was not good now they on the paper which never asked for the time exactly and make and model of car shouldn't they just except what the insurance company sighned and gave them

""Can any one say best insurance site,which dealing with better travel insurance policies of different companies?

I want to know benefits of insurance policies of different companies before buy travel insurance policy

What is the least expensive color of car to insure?

I know red is the most expensive. I've heard that white is the least from one person and green is the least from another.

How much will my auto insurance cost?

Ok...so I'm looking at an old 73' Bug to possibly buy for college and all. Cost- of the car at least- is not a problem, as its $100, and I have $100. (Yes, it does have issues and looks horrible, but hey it runs and drives). So...that brings up insurance. There is NO way I can get in on my mom's insurance- she won't let me get a car so the only way is if I do all myself, and I'm 18 now and going to college in a few weeks, so a=Im looking at my options. I know as a male teenage driver its going to be high, but what is high? How much will good grades and all that help? Just, what would you recommend and how much could it end up costing? Thanks...""

Is Progressive Auto Insurance a good company?

I have several insurance quotes from State Farm and Allstate, and Progressive beats the price by almost half. But, when something looks to good to be true, it probably is. Is this good insurance? Are they good with claims?""

Do I need to declare to my insurance company If I change my alloy wheels.?

It currently has the factory 16 alloy wheels on but 2 of them are buckled. I don't want to buy new ones the same as this seems to be a common problem with ford fiesta alloys so was thinking of replacing them with the same size alloys of a different brand. Do I have to declare this to my insurance company?

What is the average insurance cost for a 2012 Chevy Cruze?

I will be turning 21 in June. No tickets or accidents on my record. What would the average monthly payment be for insurance?

How much would car Insurance be for a 16 year old girl?

I live in Michigan. Thank you :)

Nj motorcycle insurance?

im 23, male, have a pretty good car driving record (if that helps), but my credit isnt that good. how much (ball park) would it be in nj for motorcycle insurance. im planning on purchasing a bike in the next 8 months and wanna know how much i should expect to pay for insurance. i will get a quote, i just wanna know from you guys a rough estimate. thanks""

What do I need before I get car insurance besides license?

I have my license, and a car that I bought that is in my dad's name. He wants to transfer ownership to my name, inspection expired in 2007 (I haven't driven for about a year). First, do I need to have a car in my name to get insurance, or can I just get ins. with the car in my dad's name then transfer the title later? (with no ins. changes) 2nd, to get insurance do I need to pass inspection, or can I just get ins. first?""

How old dose a car/vehicle need to be for lower insurance?

I am 17 and i have been saving money for a brand new car and i started looking for one and i found the one i want and so i decided to get a quote on the insurance for it and the quote as around 350 and the car payment quote was 200 i thought that this is a little ridicules myself and i cant afford insurance that high... So i was just wondering how old a vehicle needs to be before the insurance is way lower than what it would be if it was brand new!

I need to find a good Car no older then lets say 1999! Thats good on Gas and low Insurance! Low Price $5000 <!

Hi my name is James. I am a college student and I am looking for a used car to get me through college and maybe Further! I am hoping to spend under $5000 Dollars. I need it to be able to have a lower insurance rate then lets say a sports car. I also need something thats has a very good fuel efficacy! I am a tall guy but can fit into any thing! So if any of you know of a car that looks almost good has good gas millage and is not too expensive on car insurance let me know! ASAP!!!!!! Oh and this car not one I want to buy online or privately. It is one I want to buy from a car dealer ship this is just to help me lock down my search!

Non-credit based car insurance?

i saw a commercial on tv about a car insurance company that bases your premium on your driving record, not your credit score. but i cant remember the name. anyone know? thanks!""

Livingston Manor New York Cheap car insurance quotes zip 12758

Livingston Manor New York Cheap car insurance quotes zip 12758

Can anybody Reccomend a good online insurance company for a Cagiva Mito 125?

I have been looking around for a low insurance rate for my Cagiva Mito 125 Motorbike, does any Mito owners know of a good insurer for that bike and how much did you pay?""

Do I buy car insurance before buying a car from a private party?

I'm buying a car this weekend from a private seller (we are just waiting for the duplicate title to come in the mail; she lost the original). Money won't be exchanged until ...show more

Where can i find cheap auto insurance?

I am 18, almost 19""

I just got a speeding ticket how much will insurance go up?

Im 18 i was speeding to get to school, 50 in 35... The ticket was worth 50 dollars, i pay 1200 a year for insurance and i was wondering how much it goes up, and my insurance company is farris insurance in Hickory NC, and my sister works there.""

What bike would be cheapest on insurance?

scooter?street+trail?chopper?crotchrocket? or anything?which bike out of all bikes street legal and able to achieve 50mph is the cheapest insurance wise

Do you think which is better for a 1984 corvette classic car insurance or regular car insurance?

I am planning on getting a 1984 corvette but the insurance for it is a little too high.i just found out about classic car insurance but i really don't know much about it.but for classic car insurance,am i limited to a certain number of things like how far i can drive my car,when i can drive,etc?will the insurance actually be less or more for classic car insurance?and what is the best classic car insurance company i should go with?""

How much would a Ford Puma cost to insure?

I'm 16, taking driving lessons soon after my birthday, and I'd love to get a Puma, I know insurance is a lot... But I thought that as it's a small, 2 door car, the price might drop a bit, if maybe the price is going to be quite high (Above average for a new driver) then please suggest some other cars that are cheap to insure :) But I would really like one of these x) Also considering fuel consumption and economy :) One of these - http://www.autotrader.co.uk/classified/advert/201228478314260/usedcars/postcode/bn72ph?logcode=kp :) Thanks very much""

Can I sue someone with auto insurance?

I live in Las Vegas and I was involved in a car accident in November. There were 6 cars involved and this process is being UNUSUALLY long. It is impossible to get in contact with one of the claimants so we can not settle for our car damages. Can I sue the individuals that were held respoinsible for the auto accident?

Can I get insurance myself at 17?

I'm 16 right now and I have been diagnosed with major depressive. My mom lost her insurance in May last year and I haven't been to a doctor since. My symptoms are getting worse and I attempted suicide a couple months ago (refused to see a doctor afterwards because I didn't want social services to get involved). I have a family history with depression and mood disorders and my condition is only getting worse. I tried to get insurance all summer and fall last year, but I couldn't qualify for medi cal (I live in california) because of my age supposedly and my old doctor refused to sign off on minors consent. I'm wondering if things will be different by the time I turn 17? Will I be more likely to be accepted by then? Is there anything else I can do that won't get my mom arrested and me put into the foster care system? I feel like the social workers have a gun pointed to my back right now.. if I say much more about my problems to them they'll take me, and my little brother. Also CPS is not an option I want nothing to do with them or foster care. I would rather continue on and die in my condition than go to the foster home in my area, I've met kids stuck in that system and continuing on without medical care seems better than living in that hell hole. And I certainly wouldn't wish that on my little brother.""

Is Medicaid consider as A health insurance?

Hello, I live in Texas and am going to college. My mom wants me to get health insurance stuffs fill out for college, so I have to pay less(? not sure if this is true). The website told me to to file my health insurance so they can take some of the health bill off the insurance.""

I reasonly got layied off need my wife is haven a baby need to know about insurance?

i got layied off from my job im a union worker in nyc and i have to work a certin amout of hours to keep my heath insurance going . my term ends in june my baby is do in july there for i will not be covered when the baby is do . does any one know what i can do for covrage i have aetna ? is there anyway i can extend my insurance ?

How does rbs insurance differentiate itself from it's competitors?

Hi, I'm filling out an internship form, and I'm stuck on this question.. Please help me! Thank you""

Minor car accident without insurance?

I caused a scratch. But I don't have insurance by that time. What am I supposed to do? Go to beg the old lady stop claim insurance company but solve that privately? But she already reported to insurance company. Can she withdraw the claim so we can solve privately? Any other choice?

How much will my car insurance go up?

I recently had an accident and my car was totaled, it was my fault, i did have full coverage so they did pay for my car and the other person, can someone give me an idea like a percentage or something that will help me determine how much more i will be paying, i am currently paying $95/month.""

Need Insurance?

I am buying a new car and have to get insurance. Any suggestions on good and cheap companies?

How many people lack health insurance?

If you lack health insurance, why? If you cannot afford it, what could people around you do to help you out?""

How much would car insurance cost for me?

Im seventeen. And female. The car is a black 94 Jetta standard (if that has anything to do with it) Im just confused about insurance. People are saying it would be very expensive but I turn 18 in a month should I wait until then? Also people say insurance is cheaper for girls. Is this true? And what insurance company is cheapest?

""How can i get insurance if my car cost 20,000?""

How can i get insurance if my car cost 20,000?""

Is a Pontiac Grand Am considered a sports car?

Want to know if it'll be a higher insurance cost..... Thanks. :3

What types of insurance are required in Minnesota?

I have a permit test in about an hour and I forgot what kinds of insurance are required in the state of Minnesota? There are 2 of them I think it's liability and no fault? Help please?

What is the cheapest auto insurance for 16 year old boy?

Thanks in advance

Whats the difference between insurance and bonded insurance on roofs?

i started my construction business and im looking for some good insurance, and im not too sure whats the difference between a regular construction business insurance and bonded insurance? any suggestions?""

Insurance Rates?

I'm a 17 year old male and I just got my 1st speeding ticket today and it was a 6 point ticket how much do you think my insurance rate will go up by

Do i need insurance to sell motobikes?

I am selling mini moto's and quad bikes online, do i need liability insurance to sell these?""

Do I need to pay for insurance when I have my temps in Ohio?

My mom has insurance on her car, but I wanted to know do I have to pay for separate insurance for me?""

Livingston Manor New York Cheap car insurance quotes zip 12758

Livingston Manor New York Cheap car insurance quotes zip 12758

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