#and jiang cheng is socially awkward and has a hard time talking to his dad

[winepresswrath]

Unpopular take, but I dont actually think that JFM preferred Wei Wuxian to Jiang Cheng. I think he was harder on Jiang Cheng BECAUSE he saw him as his true son, and that he needed to put him in a good place to be a leader after him, complicated by the fact that he and MY have very different parenting styles. Wei Wuxian started of as a traumatized toddler, and turned into a favorite disciple who he was willing to let misbehave a bit. All this got escalated bc he cant communicate shit

I’m sure he did love Jiang Cheng, but I also do think he just likes Wei Wuxian better. It happens, even with good parents. Sometimes you just have a kid you connect with really well on a personal level and would be close to even if you met them outside of a family context, and also a kid who that is not true of. You’ve just got to either hide it or thread the needle and make sure all your kids feel secure and loved even if you’re better friends with one of them. I think the sect heir stuff makes it worse, because it means that he does have to be harder on Jiang Cheng, and also because it means there’s another not-fun thing (training his heir) getting in the way of them having an actually enjoyable relationship, but the actual problem is that for whatever reason Jiang Fengmian kind of emotionally absented himself from their relationship. It was probably more about Madame Yu and his feelings about her and their marriage and how she expressed her feelings about his relationship with their son than it was about Jiang Cheng as a person, but at the end of the day if you don’t show up for your kid that’s going to impact your closeness. On top of everything else I think he just doesn’t know Jiang Cheng very well. And their whole deal makes Jiang Cheng all sad and rejected and miserable about what’s so wrong with him that his dad doesn’t like him, which makes him even less fun to be around, and the cycle continues.

#jiang cheng #jiang fengmian #and he has nannies! #almost certainly! #not to mention a daughter he sticks with all the actual parenting anyway #his problem is that jiang cheng is moody and cranky #it happens! you don't always get sunshine gremlin or actual angel #grumpy but dutiful and loving is not that big a deal dude #and he has a thing that many parents with difficult kids do not #in that his kid adores him and really actively wants a relationship with him #ugh you know that scene from the book where wwx is like 'oh man i should have let you punch zixuan because then uncle jiang would have #stayed home' #and then is like #oops shouldn't have said that cause it's true #just... OUCH #or the bit where they're at dinner and the narrator pauses to be like #and jiang cheng is socially awkward and has a hard time talking to his dad #while wei wuxian does not! #and it's just! #he's honestly not that bad as a kid at all! being cranky and socially awkward is not the same thing as being bad or unloveable and it fucks #me up how much he clearly does not know that