Tumgik
#and lord i hope we get new music
zreamy · 9 months
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spf 23
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pairing: park sunghoon x fem!reader
summary: for as long as you can remember, your summers have been much the same, largely spent in your hometown, relaxing by the local pool. when you get back home this summer, things seem like they'll go the same way, until you get to the pool that is — when did the lifeguard get so hot?
genres: smut, fluff, people that kinda know each other to lovers, summer au, lifeguard au..
warnings: minors dni, MENTIONS OF UNIVERSITY DURING SUMMER, sunghoon in water, sunghoon on ice, sunghoon
word count: 31,818 .. even more sorry than last time.
playlist: kiss nct dojaejung, obvious ariana grande, safety net ariana grande
author's note: lmk ur thoughts (positive / negative / sunghoon) i'd love to hear. to beta bestie @asahicore u da best MUSIC DJ EMMAAA. i hope u have a good time reading, lord knows this has been a long time coming.. ok enjoy <;333
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It’s the hottest day of the last summer of your life. 
The sun’s rays coat your skin in a film of sticky sweat and sunscreen. Crisp white clouds hang in the sky, drifting overhead. Yunjin complains about the temperature as if you and Chaewon aren’t outside with her.
If you strain your ears over yelling children and raucous laughter, you can just about hear a Top 40 playlist looping Cupid and Dua Lipa songs through age-weakened speakers. What holds your attention the most, though, is the blond by the pool. He leans back on his hands with pretty fingers spread out behind him. He’s been lifeguarding at the public pool for more summers than you care to count but he’d never looked like this while he did it. 
Park Sunghoon seems relaxed as he sits on the pool’s edge, kicking his legs in the water and scanning the space. Presumably watching out for kids drowning, or diving, or.. whatever it is lifeguards get up to at work. His voice is deep as he (half-heartedly) yells at a group of kids with water guns to stop running. When did he get so buff?
He’s always been attractive. Always. But this is outrageous. The bleached hair. The toned arms. The sliver of skin you can see peeking out from under his cropped vest. It’s almost too much to take yet you can’t bring yourself to look away. Given the way he turns his head when you catch his gaze — with flushed cheeks and upturned lips — you assume his glow-up has been purely external. 
“Can you believe this might be the last summer we spend here together? Like, this time next year we’ll be graduates.” Yunjin’s sudden statement makes you wish she’d go back to talking about the weather. 
Chaewon’s jaw drops. “Whoa.”
“Is it bad that I’m looking forward to fall?” Yunjin asks. “No offence, YN.” 
This isn’t the first time she’s shared such a sentiment. Last summer and the one before, she’d said something similar before clarifying. She’s excited about her new classes, not about you going back to your apartment a few towns over.
You’re only looking forward to your shared two-bed and Minjeong’s dinners. It pains you to have to thank university for anything, but thank university for giving you something to miss over the holidays. 
“None taken, YJ, but break just started last week.” 
“Our last finals were five weeks ago.”
“Well, you know break doesn’t really start until our girl gets back.” Chaewon leans up in her seat to grin at you. She raises her cup, the tiny puddle of melted slushy shaking a little. “Here’s to the best summer ever!” 
Needing all the affirmation you can get, you entertain her, raising your own cup so the three of you can toast properly. 
“Cheers!”
The next few hours do nothing to affirm your belief in the effectiveness of toasting. Recently hot Sunghoon hasn’t taken his shirt off yet and you’re not sure how many more times you can beg your friends to stay for another half hour in hopes something will happen that causes him to tear the thing off. At this point you’d settle for a simple conversation or even the word hey.
“I’m begging, like, actually, let’s go.” Yunjin groans, sitting up.
“Just let me pee first,” you grumble, attempting to buy more time as you stand up from your lounge chair, packing up your towel and the magazine you never bothered to look at. 
On your walk to the restroom, you see him leaning in the doorframe of the changing rooms with his toned arms crossed over his chest. Perfect. There’s a smile on your face as you approach him and unexpectedly he speaks before you do. 
"He—" He clears his throat, thick brows coming together as he places a big hand on his chest. "Hey."
You let out a breathy laugh. “You okay?” 
He straightens up his posture and nods his head, blond hair shifting over his forehead from the movement. 
The sounds of the public pool fill the silence stretching over you, though it’s not enough to distract you from the way his eyes trail over your body, landing on your chest as his tongue darts out to wet his lips. 
“I’m Sunghoon,” he eventually introduces, extending a hand for you to shake. 
A smile stretches across your lips when you do, noticing how much bigger his hand is than yours when his fingers wrap around it and cover the whole thing. “I know,” you nod.
“You,” Sunghoon pauses, tilting his head to the side as if considering your words. “Know?” His brows quirk up. 
You hum in response. “We had Spanish together. You sat with.. that kid,” Your hands come up to gesture around your chin and neck. “With the jaw, Jay, was it?” 
He looks at something over your shoulder for a bit while you worry that he didn’t take Spanish and you’ve got the wrong guy, but a laugh rises out of him instead. “Yeah,” he grins. “Jay.” Nods his head.
Despite stuttering his way through the conversation, Sunghoon makes you laugh as he tells you about how he didn’t realise he’d have to swim on the job and almost drowned trying to save a kid in the deep end. He seems more confident after seeing that his story was well received though he still fidgets with his hands, and can’t hold eye contact for more than a second at a time, always looking away and clearing his throat. 
The story was a bit of a ramble, and it might be the most words you’ve ever heard him say all at once before falling quiet, though his pretty lips open and close a few times as if he’s stuck on what to say. “How-” He’s cut off by the sound of someone yelling his name. 
In the pool, a cute (and very tall) kid waving his arms above his head yelling: Quickly! Quickly! makes you laugh, and the way Sunghoon rolls his eyes makes it clear he knows him.
Much to your dismay, the yelling doesn’t stop and you realise you’ll have to make your exit. “I’ll let you get going, but, uh, say hi to Jay for me, okay?” you say, grinning at the way he nods his head, mumbling yeah, of course before you turn around to leave.
Sunghoon’s still standing in the spot you left him in, hands crossed over his chest as he eyes you. Head snapping in the other direction when you look back over your shoulder to call out a: Later, Hoonie, with a wave of your fingers.
Chaewon watches you over her sunglasses with a smirk on her face as you approach. “Who is that?”
You crinkle your nose. “Park Sunghoon.”
At the sound of his name, Yunjin gasps, abruptly sitting up in her chair. “The figure skater?”
“The what?”
At home, you type his name into the search bar and find that the shy boy you’d only met properly some hours ago is something of a celebrity in the skating world. 
You watch YouTube videos of his short programs and feel a swell of pride with each jump he lands. The tiny Sunghoon on the screen carries an air of confidence as he glides across the ice — nothing like the Sunghoon you’d met at the pool today. And definitely nothing like the quiet Sunghoon who’d sit in the back of your 9th grade Spanish class conjugating verbs as his friends got into trouble for talking over the teacher. 
It’s not hard to trip down a rabbit hole, and suddenly every video with his name in the title has a little red bar under the thumbnail as a mark of your affection. It doesn’t take long for you to find Instagram user smartblond, and the blue follow button on his page greets you with the option to follow back, which leaves you feeling a little bad as the pad of your thumb falls onto it unthinkingly. 
Sunghoon’s feed leaves much to be desired. A modest 1 post he’d made 4 years prior, a square photo of himself and Lee Heeseung with bros as the caption. The only comment is from Heeseung who wrote ma boiiii. The tagged photos however tell a different story. 
Thankfully.  
You spend longer than you’d like to admit scrolling through these pictures, grinning and ignoring the way your stomach flips at the sight of the seemingly outgoing boy captured in the pictures posted by his closest friends with wide smiles and middle fingers while trying not to hit like on any of them. Even though you do like them. A lot. Except for the one of him and Bae Sumin at the pool with pretty smiles on their faces, and their arms around each other that she posted 15 weeks ago with the caption lifesaver. A smile spreads on your lips when you see Sumin’s (way more populated) page and the post she made yesterday to celebrate two years with her boyfriend. 
Distraction only reaches you in the form of an alert from your university’s portal app. The words you’ve got new correspondence in your inbox wipe the smile from your face in an instant. While chewing at your lip, you click on the notification and wait for the email to load. 
A pit forms in your stomach while reading four paragraphs offering advice for people who’ve failed their final exams. At the end is a link that you click with squinted eyes. A countdown appears and there are 8 days, 12 hours, 2 minutes and 17 seconds until results are out.
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During your next trip to the pool, you hear Sunghoon before you see him and his voice comes out in a cute whine when he speaks. “Why do you guys only wanna hang out here when I'm working?” 
Looking over your sunglasses, you see him running a hand through his hair, looking up from the water at a group of boys you recognise from both high school and his tagged photos, including the very tall kid who’d cut your conversation short the other day. With a wide grin on his face, he slings a towel over his shoulder and calls out something about the concession stand before running for the changing rooms and ignoring Sunghoon’s cries to stop. 
His back flexes deliciously as he wades around the mostly empty pool, chatting to his friends, and in all of your staring you notice Jay’s eyes on you, looking back to Sunghoon after a while and nodding his head not so subtly in your direction.
You look at Yunjin in the lounge chair next to you, who stares at the remnants of your blue raspberry slushy with disgust on her face, finishing off her cherry-flavoured one. “I said thanks when you came back with them, it’s abnormal to want this much recognition over a £1 purchase,” you say defensively, sighing and thanking her again anyways. 
“You should thank Sunghoon’s giant friend,” she says, nodding in his direction. “He came over to me in the line, asked how I knew you, and gave me change when I told him Chaewon introduced us.” 
“Huh,” you say, taking a refreshing sip, the last, before putting your cup down between your chairs. 
“I don’t understand what you see in that insane flavour.” She leans over to put her now empty cup next to yours. “It’s.. unnatural,” she says, shuddering dramatically. 
“It’s the only flavour I like,” you say simply, watching in your peripheral as your new favourite lifeguard (not that you have an old favourite) climbs over the edge of the pool.
The sight of Sunghoon’s lean figure coming out of the pool only makes you regret ever wanting to see him with his shirt off. Water slips from every part of his body in droplets, running from his broad shoulders down his veiny forearms before falling from his pretty fingers onto the ground. This must be the fittest-looking person you’ve ever seen, and Kazuha can do push-ups (one) with you and Chaewon on her back. 
With his wet hair stuck to his forehead, he laughs at something one of his friends said and it’s only when he looks over at you that you’re able to tear your eyes away. 
You miss the sight as soon as it’s gone. 
“That’s absurd,” Yunjin says after a moment. You have no idea what she’s talking about. “Can I open the Skittles?”
You’d forgotten about those. “Go ahead.” 
While rummaging through your bag, Yunjin tells you quietly that Sunghoon’s coming though you barely have a chance to look at him before his shadow casts over the two of you, stark and vivid. With his arms crossed over his chest, Sunghoon towers over you. His red shorts cling onto his hips, so low you can see every inch of muscle definition spanning his stomach where little beads of water stare you dead in the eye. By the time you manage to look up at his face, he has a huge grin stretched over his pretty lips. “Hey, stalker,” he says.
Though his smile falters when you crease your brows, pulling your sunglasses down your nose. “Stalker?” 
“You, uh,” he pauses to sniff, less sure of himself than earlier. “I saw that you followed me on Instagram last night.” 
“You did? And no DM?” 
No DM, he repeats under his breath, visibly confused, and the—“Ohhhh, you wanted to talk to me?” 
“Yeah, that’s why I followed you.”
“Right.” A nod. “And no DM?” Sunghoon seems to like the way you laugh, uncrossing his arms, and puffing his chest out. “So what did you wanna talk about that just couldn’t wait until you saw me again?” 
“I wanted to catch up.”
A sceptical look crosses his face. “Really? Anything specific you wanted to talk about?” 
“Not really. I just think you’re interesting.”
“Me? Interesting?” The mixture of amusement and surprise on his face makes you laugh. 
“Yes, you, interesting.” A saccharine smile spreads across your lips as you swing your legs over the side of your chair. Sunghoon apologises when your ankle grazes his calf. “Very interesting.” 
Sitting like this, your face is so close to his hips you can see the loose thread at the top of his shorts. He seems to notice, taking a step back. Down the bridge of his nose, he watches you through squinted eyes, furrowing his brow and letting a beat pass. “How so?” 
“There’s a lot of reasons, but, for one, you’re the only figure skater I know.”
So quickly you barely see it, Sunghoon’s lips curl into a frown before he presses them together, nodding. “How’s summer treating you?” He changes the subject. 
You let him. “Pretty good,” you say, bringing a hand up to the tied strap of your swimsuit to pull it to the side. “And I’m tanning pretty well, right, Sunghoon?” 
A massive cloud glides across the sky, casting a welcome shadow over the scorching sun. The transition is gradual but relief is immediate and even Sunghoon sighs. You push your sunglasses up to rest in your hair, taken aback, like always, by how bright it actually is outside. Even with the sun covered up, your eyes sting a little without the tint making you squint up at Sunghoon who watches you with an amused smile. 
“Is there something on my face?” you ask. 
“No, nothing like that.” He shakes his head. “It’s just.. nice catching up with you.”
“Yeah. It is.” You return his smile, liking the way his widens. “So, how’s summer trea—” You’re cut off by the same kid as yesterday, yelling “Sunghoooooooooon!” At the top of his lungs. 
“What were you saying?” 
“Uh,” you start, distracted by the kid pointing at Sunghoon, who waves frantically when he realises he’s caught your eye. “You, uh,” you pause, using a finger to point over to the pool. “I think your friend might need you.” 
He turns to look over his shoulder, the sun shining directly on the side of his face when he does, highlighting the pretty mole on his nose that you’ve somehow never noticed. Sunghoon shakes his head and freezing water splashes onto your stomach, making you flinch. A non-committal sound comes out of his mouth as he shrugs, facing you once again. “It’s just Riki.”
Just Riki doesn’t let up. Instead, he enlists the help of a cute cat-eyed boy, clambering onto his shoulders and balancing precariously as he yells and yells at the top of his lungs. 
“Okay, yeah, I gotta,” Sunghoon sighs, using his thumb to motion towards the pool as he walks backwards away from you. He points a long index finger at you before turning around. “I’m coming back,” he says. 
With a huge splash, Riki falls from his friend’s shoulders unceremoniously, his form disappearing for a moment, replaced by a mess of bubbles and long frantic limbs until he resurfaces. 
“I’m not here to play, I’m here to work!” Sunghoon calls out, walking right off the coping and into the water, swimming towards his friends anyway. 
He doesn’t come back. 
That night you stay at Chaewon’s, rifling through old teen magazines and taking quizzes to determine who your ‘celeb bezzie’ is. Answering mostly C’s, the two of you squeal at the prospect of a friendship with Lindsay Lohan. 
Jaehyun’s complaining when you reach the pool and you figure Yunjin and Kazuha must be nearby. Your hunch is correct when you round the corner by the water slide and see the two of them splashing each other in the small pool. He’s standing with his hands on his hips and yelling something about the literal sign that says they can’t be in there right now. The sign is a bright red fold-out thing, saying in bold white letters that the pool is closed for swimming lessons starting at 1:30 p.m. 
“It’s 1:20, you can’t be in here,” Jaehyun groans, raking a hand through his hair. “I know you guys think because we’re friends you can do what you want but the other lifeguards kicked me from the group chat and Sunghoon said it’s all your fault.” 
The mention of Sunghoon makes your ears perk up, and you decide to insert yourself. “What did they do wrong?” 
Jaehyun practically jumps at the sound of your voice next to him and Yunjin calls out for you to get in! “Don’t you dare,” Jaehyun mutters, cutting his eyes. “Whatever it is was bad enough for Mark, Yeri, and Chaeyoung to decide I’m not worthy of LIFESAVERS 2.0 swimming guy emoji, ring float emoji.” 
“If you got kicked because of them, I don’t see why Sunghoon gets to stay.” You tilt your head, stepping back a little when you feel a splash hitting your feet. “His one million-man friend group takes up half of the big pool every day, competing for who can laugh the loudest, and these two are pretty much doing the same thing.” 
“Yes, but Sunghoon’s friends aren’t breaking the rules.” 
“I saw Riki take an ice cream cone from a kid yesterday.”
“That’s not against the rules,” Jaehyun sighs. “And Chaeyoung thinks Sunghoon’s cute, so.” 
“She does?” you ask too quickly. 
“What do you care?” Jaehyun spares you a glance, arching his brow. He seems to undergo some kind of revelation, gasping a little and nodding his head. “So that’s why you guys are here all the time! You totally like that loser.” 
“Sunghoon’s not a loser, he’s hot.”
“Interesting thing to dispute.” 
You roll your eyes. “Do I need to worry about Chaeyoung?” you ask quietly.
“If you’re trying to hook up with Sunghoon I wouldn’t worry about her.”
You hate his response; hate that instead of really answering you, he’s just left you with even more questions. 
And you hate Chaeyoung for falling into your line of sight just as you mention her. 
She leaves the locker room, laughing about something with Yeri, and making you wonder what exactly she wants with Sunghoon. And why she suddenly feels like your competitor.
“And if I’m not?” 
Jaehyun cackles at your suggestion. “You? Not trying to hook up?” 
You can’t come up with a reason for why his words make your chest ache so you shove him with your elbow before jumping into the water with the girls. The sound of Jaehyun groaning and begging you guys to get out of the pool only dissolves the ache and puts a smile on your face.
Yunjin and Kazuha gang up on you for taking so long to join them but the water feels so cool against your skin you can’t help but enjoy it. 
The sound of what you think is Sunghoon’s voice makes you freeze in your spot. “I can’t keep defending you, man,” he sighs. 
At the sound of a whistle blowing, you raise your hands to cover your ears and all three of you whip your heads in its direction. Sunghoon stands next to Jaehyun with a whistle in his mouth, coughing around the metal when he sees you. He smiles, dropping it to rest against his chest. “Oh, hey.” 
“Hi,” you greet, swimming over to the edge of the pool and resting your arms on it, letting your chin find a home against them. Looking up, you see Jaehyun rolling his eyes before walking off in the opposite direction and Sunghoon stares down at you with a smile on his face.
“How are you?” he asks, fidgeting with the whistle like a charm on a necklace. 
“I’m good, how are you?” 
“Good, me too. Uh-your friends,” he pauses, clearing his throat. “I’m teaching lessons here, in five minutes, so I was wondering if you guys could maybe hang out in the main pool or by the slides instead?” he asks. It seems like he’s asking. “Only if you want.” 
“What if we’re here for lessons?” 
“Oh, I’m sorry, you guys must be the six-year-olds I’m teaching this afternoon, my bad for assuming.” 
You can’t tell if he was trying to be funny or if that was just something he said for the sake of saying it, but it makes you smile anyway. “You don’t do lessons for grown-ups?”
Sunghoon shakes his head. “I teach 6 to 12-year-olds, but Mark teaches adult classes on Saturday mornings if you’re interested.”
You nod, lifting yourself out of the pool, dripping water on the concrete. You’re close enough to Sunghoon to clearly see his jaw tensing, and the way his gaze shamelessly falls to your chest for more than a few seconds. 
“What if I’m interested in a one-on-one lesson?” 
Close enough to see the goosebumps that rise on his skin. He licks his lips, holding your gaze. “I guess we could work something out,” he says, clearing his throat when you rest a hand on his wrist, though he doesn’t look away from you. 
It seems like it’s just the two of you and the sun beating against your skin. And his pulse racing against your fingers. 
An excited wail grounds you, brings you back to the pool. “Sunghoonie! Sunghoonie!” You hear over his shoulder, as a tiny girl with pigtails and a huge grin comes rushing over to you. “Look, I got new goggles, look at my new goggles!” 
You take a step back and Sunghoon gasps, holding her Hello Kitty goggles in his hands, inspecting them carefully while crouching down to her level. In his absence, you see more, equally excited, kids plodding along, babbling to each other, followed by parents with small character backpacks slung over their shoulders. 
Sunghoon chats animatedly with her, nodding and gasping and saying really? at all the right times, in a way that summons butterflies. She giggles and holds her belly laughing when he holds her baby sized goggles over his head, asking if he can try them on, and you need to leave before you burst into tears at how sweet he’s being.
Yunjin and Kazuha beam at you when you look over at them, winking dramatically and giving you silent rounds of applause. Your cheeks burn at the sight, mumbling at them to come on, before turning around to walk away. 
“Hey, YN!” Sunghoon calls out, stopping you in your tracks. He’s standing with his arms crossed over his chest, and a small smile on his lips. “See you later, yeah?” 
“Yeah.” You nod. 
The girls have caught up to you by now, Yunjin’s eyebrows waggling suggestively as she links her fingers with yours. “Oh, he is so into you,” Kazuha whispers, wrapping a dripping arm around your shoulders. “Chaewon was right, summer really doesn’t start until you get back.”
In the main pool, you play around with the girls until you’re tired from swimming and the heat, and if it wasn’t for what Sunghoon said, you would have gone home already. You lay back in a lounge chair and close your eyes behind your sunglasses. You could probably fall asleep out here, feeling an odd comfort in the blood-curdling screams and mix of music playing from tiny bluetooth speakers all over the place. 
About five minutes later, you use your fingers to pick out a few pieces of Oreo from Yunjin’s ice cream, deciding they’ll be compensation for having to deal with the sticky dessert trickling down the cone and onto your fingers. Though in this heat, it doesn’t bother you so much.
On your trip back to your seat, you see Heeseung and Sunghoon by the locker room entrance. Standing in the shade, the two of them talk while Sunghoon lets a chunky pair of sunglasses rest on the back of his head, a sight that makes you clench your fist so hard the cone crunches under your fingers. You watch Heeseung’s face split into a grin while he throws his head back laughing, though Sunghoon presses his lips together in a straight line, clearly unimpressed. 
Yunjin jogs over to you, thanking you for the cone and complaining about how stingy Jungwoo’s being with the Oreo pieces these days but taking an appreciative lick anyway, letting her head fall back and a long hum of satisfaction buzz against her lips. “Just go over there and talk to him,” she says after a while. 
“Wow, YJ, thank you. I hadn’t thought of that.” 
She flips you off before walking away.
You don’t mean to catch his eye but he smiles when he sees you, waving when you wave. Heeseung waves too. If Sunghoon had been standing on his own you’d have no problem approaching him, but something about interrupting their conversation puts you off. Heeseung nods at you and calls out your name, inviting you to interrupt them. 
“It’s funny, we were just talking about you,” Heeseung says. You’re not sure how he wants you to respond to that, but Sunghoon looks at him with wide eyes, using his elbow to nudge his oversharing friend. “All good things, of course,” he adds on, raking a hand through his hair. 
“Who could have anything bad to say about you?” Sunghoon asks. 
Out of genuine concern, you ask if they’re okay, which only makes the two of them burst out laughing. Awkward laughter in the form of robotic ha ha has and forced applause. You’re not sure what to make of this, looking back and forth between them with a crease along your brow. High school was probably the last time you talked to Lee Heeseung, but besides the piercings and muscle definition he doesn’t seem to have changed much. 
“How have you been? How’s college?” Heeseung asks after wiping his left eye with the back of his hand. 
“I’ve been good. I saw you graduated last week, congrats!” 
He looks delighted at the mention of his own studies, missing the fact that you’re trying to avoid talking about yours. “Thank you!” he says, beaming. “Do you know what classes you’re taking this year?”
“No.” You shake your head. “You studied music, right?” 
An impossibly brighter grin spreads across his lips, eyes shining with genuine happiness as he nods. “Yeah, I majored in production actually. Best thing I ever did.”
For a while, Heeseung talks about his course though most of it goes over your head as jealousy burns in your stomach. The last three years have gone well enough for you to know that you’re more than just good at your major, so why, like him, can’t you enjoy it too? Right now, you want nothing more than for stupid Heeseung to shut up about his stupid career choices. 
Sunghoon interrupts the conversation, seeming to notice your mild irritation. “Hey, are you okay?” he asks, resting a hand on your shoulder.
He doesn’t seem convinced when you nod your head belatedly, clearing your throat. You do your best to focus on the burn of his hand on your skin and not your jealousy. 
Sunghoon looks over at Heeseung, giving him a look that the older boy takes as an invitation to leave, smiling at the both of you before waving goodbye. 
“What’s the matter?” His voice is much softer now that you’re alone, so comforting that you’re tempted to fall into his chest and tell him everything that’s ever upset you.
“What makes you think something’s the matter?”
“You were staring at Heeseung like you wanted to wipe the stupid smile off his face with a bullet.”  
“Actually, I think he has quite a nice smile,” you admit.
“Yeah,” Sunghoon agrees. “But it’s a little annoying, right? Like how everything just seems to go so well for him no matter what. Perfect guy with a perfect major, it’s a little hard not to be jealous of him when he talks like that.” 
“You don’t like what you study?” 
“It’s not my major I’m struggling with.” He lets out a dry laugh. “What about you?” 
A deep sigh rolls out of you, pulling your shoulders down. “I’m good at it so why stop, you know?” 
“Plenty of people stop things they’re good at.” The response comes quicker than you expect, in a defensive tone that makes you want to slice open his brain and take a look inside. “Sorry, I just mean if something isn’t making you happy, then it’s okay to stop. Right?” 
It doesn’t feel like he’s talking about you. “Right,” you affirm anyway. “It’s just that I only have a year left so the way I see it, I should just deal with it, graduate, and worry next summer instead. Uni sorta freaks me out is all,” you explain, shrugging in a way that you hope looks nonchalant. “I don’t like my course, and I don’t like talking about it, so let’s not talk about it.”
Sunghoon nods. “No talking about uni, got it,” he says, holding an imaginary pen and making a note of your words in the palm of his hand, with a tiny smile on his face that makes your stomach twist. “So, what do you like talking about?”
“Literally anything else.” 
“Look at us, so much in common.” There’s a hesitant look on his face, like he’s questioning his word choice but he smiles when you do, letting out a breathy laugh at the sound of a chuckle slipping out of you. 
“Hey, Sunghoon?” you ask after a beat, tilting your head and continuing when he hums. “Do you work here every day?” 
He shakes his head. “Just Monday through Thursday.”
“So, if I wanna see you, I could just come to the pool on those days?” 
“Yeah.” Even in the shade, it’s hard to miss the way his cheeks flush pink, and he scratches at the back of his neck while stifling a smile. “Exactly.” 
“And if it’s Friday or the weekend, and I wanna see you, I could just text you?” 
“Yeah, I think I’d like that.” That same smile curves on his lips, gentle, happy. 
You think you’d like that too. 
Sunghoon puts his number in your phone and you send a text so he has yours too.
The sun doesn’t set until late that night, and you spend the better part of the evening in the garden with your mum, catching the last moments of the sun’s rays from a blanket in the grass. The sound of her fingers against the keyboard is like a perfect mechanical OST for the summer romance you’re halfway through. Though knowing that the countdown in your email is set to strike zero in a matter of hours makes it difficult to concentrate on what’s going on in the made up beach town you’re reading about.
After a late dinner, you click the link to watch the countdown hit zero before refreshing the page. The stark white background of the login page stings your eyes in your dark room as you wait for the results page to load with a held breath. All three of your course titles are marked with MP for merit pass. A weight falls from your shoulders only to be replaced with another. 
The family group chat doesn’t seem to share your distress. Your dad hearts the message and sends a gif of Michael Scott clapping, your mum texts back that she’s so proud of her baby, and your older brother says KNEW U COULD DO IT! You throw your phone across the room, hiding your face in your pillow to muffle a scream. 
That night, you dream of graduation. Of crossing the stage and seeing the culmination of four long years on a flimsy piece of paper. The ceremony ends and behind closed eyes, you watch yourself sign your life away to a 9-to-5 in a field you hate, the same your brother had done. Drenched in a cold sweat, the nightmare jolts you awake. 
You spend all day in your room for fear of running into your mother and having to discuss your future.
The day after that, the familiar smell of coffee hits your nose as you walk by a cafe you used to frequent in high school, drowning yourself in hot chocolate in the winter and in sweet frozen lemonades in the summertime. If it wasn’t for your plans of seeing Chaewon you might’ve picked something up for nostalgia’s sake. 
Right when you think about her, she calls you. “Bring me a coffee,” Chaewon says. 
“What?” 
“Can you get me some coffee?” 
Looking over your shoulder, you fully expect to see Chaewon standing behind you or perched in one of the bushes across the street with a pair of binoculars. Her voice rings down the phone at you, at a volume you’re sure you would be able to hear if she was watching you from somewhere. “Hello?” 
“Yes, I’ll do it,” you say, ignoring the chill that runs down your spine and hanging up.
A bell rings above your head when you open the door, the cafe greeting you warmly like it always has. You admire its familiar green walls and the organic curves of its interior, from the sweeping archways to the round tables and chairs. Back then, you must have sat in each of them. 
You think you’re going crazy when you hear Sunghoon saying thanks, and you know you’re going crazy when you actually see him leaving the counter with his fingers wrapped around a vibrant orange iced drink. He doesn’t see you, focusing on the phone in his hand and the straw in his mouth, Adam’s apple bobbing in his throat with each sip. Sunghoon turns his back to you, walking towards a table in the far corner, his head moving to the beat of whatever song he’s listening to. He sits in the seat facing away from you, and you stare for so long that the barista has to say excuse me to get your attention. 
After apologising, you order Chaewon’s latte, giving her name over to the barista when she asks and waiting off to the side while she makes it. The whole time, you watch Sunghoon, willing him to look over at you. It doesn’t work.
Not in the way you’d been expecting, at least. Your phone vibrates against your palm.
sh: hey yn! are you doing anything nice today?
You grin at the back of his head. 
yn: seeing chaewon later :) hbu
sh: oh cool i hope you guys have fun!
sh: working later.. closing shift :/ 
When it’s ready, you collect Chaewon’s drink and approach Sunghoon’s table. He’s staring at his phone screen, where you see your conversation over his shoulder — even though it’s been five minutes since he texted you — and have to bite back a smile.
“Hey, you.” The words come out like you intended, light, pleased. 
Sunghoon jumps in his seat anyway, slamming his phone face down on the table and looking up at you. “YN,” he breathes. “Hey.” He wipes his palms on his pants. “What are you doing here?” 
“Same as you, I guess,” you grin, raising the cup in your hand. “Can I sit?” 
“Of course.” A beat passes while you take your seat and Sunghoon’s eyes don’t leave you once. 
It’s been a while since you last had a vanilla latte but it’s just as sweet as you remember when you try it, the ice doing a good job at keeping you cool. You tilt your head at the boy in front of you, checking the date on your phone. “It’s Friday today.” 
“Yeah…” Sunghoon squints at you, nodding his head slowly. “Oh, it’s Friday,” he says, seeming to figure out what you were getting at despite the lack of context. “There’s a girl I normally coach on Mondays at the rink, Hyein, but she couldn’t make it this week so we moved her session to this afternoon. To be clear though, I don’t normally work on Fridays. At the rink or otherwise.”
You nod, taking another sip of Chaewon’s coffee and angling the cup so he can’t see her name written on the side of it. 
“So, if you wanted to see me, on a Friday, or over the weekend, you could still text me about that.” 
Smiling, you nod. “Good to know. Do you work Monday to Thursday at the rink as well?” you ask, curiosity getting the better of you.
Sunlight spills through the tiled windows, warming your skin through the glass. Over his shoulder, the bell by the door rings incessantly and under the sun’s rays, flecks of amber glow in his eyes that crinkle at the corners, a dimple peeking at you as he shakes his head.
“I have my own training at 6 on Tuesdays, Wednesdays, and Thursdays, and then I teach kids classes on Monday and Tuesday nights, and I see Hyein on Monday mornings.”
“6 a.m.?”
“No, our sessions start at 10.”
“I mean your training, you start at 6 in the morning?” 
“Oh.” He nods. “Yeah,” he says, shrugging. 
“Fuck, that’s so early, I could never.” 
“I mean, that was just my training block during school. 6 to 7:45, so I’d go to the rink, back home to shower, and go to school when I could.” A beat passes before he speaks again, using his straw to stir his drink. “But that was mainly during, like, off-season. If I had competitions coming up then I’d spend entire days at the rink, or dance class, in the gym, so I missed a lot of school.” 
You nod. “I remember.” 
Sunghoon’s eyes flash with something, as his brows knit together for barely a second. He smiles. “Anyway, I did try later sessions when I started college but I was so used to my early sessions that I’d still wake up at 5 a.m. even though my classes didn’t start until the afternoon.” 
There’s a sparkle in his eyes when you ask about Hyein, and excitement in his voice while he tells you all about her. About how much potential she has, even though she doesn’t seem to realise it; about how much better she’s gotten in the year since they met and how similar she is to him at her age.
After a very slow walk with Sunghoon, you reach Chaewon’s place. It doesn’t hit you that you’re empty-handed until she opens the door and frowns at you, asking where you’ve been and what happened to her coffee.
It starts to feel like you’re running out of friends to take to the pool when, a few days later, the entire girls chat is too busy to come along, and Lee Jeno from an engineering lecture you took two years ago sits in the chair next to you, lazily flipping through an old copy of Dazed Magazine. Even if only as a last resort, Jeno makes good company seeing as you like the funny Tiktoks he shows you and the way he sneaks vodka into your slushy behind your towel. 
For a while, you pretend not to care about Sunghoon’s absence in hopes he’ll spawn from the pool’s deep end. Surprisingly, he does not. And just like that, an ugly pattern is formed: you go to the pool, wait all day for Sunghoon, and eventually, stumble back home in a daze from alcohol or sunstroke. 
It takes four and a half more, uneventful, Sunghoonless visits to the pool to leave you trying not to tear your hair out at Chaewon’s dining table. 
Kazuha serves as a good distraction though, making you quiz her on the details of Kim Yeri’s driving licence so she can come out to the club with you guys. Between the two girls looking nothing alike and Kazuha thinking a March birthday makes her a Sagittarius, you’re not hopeful. 
When she goes to the toilet, you check your phone just to be sure Sunghoon hasn’t texted in the twelve minutes since you last checked. And like before, the only messages you find are from Yeonjun asking if you’re “tryna slide” later. You aren’t, and haven’t been for the last two weeks he’d been asking. Completely unrelated to a certain blond lifeguard, of course. You sigh, thinking of Sunghoon again and why he hasn’t texted yet.
There’s nothing stopping you from sending the first text (today) — except for the fact that you’d been texting back and forth until you accidentally aired him at the start of the week. Unless you’re trying to hook up, you never send the first message. And as much as you would like to hook up with Sunghoon, there’s something about him that’s too endearing to only experience in the quiet of a backseat at 3 a.m., or in your room when no one’s home.
Four shots and a lot of egging on seem to be all you need to make your way to Sunghoon’s DMs. You let Chaewon and Kazuha debate over what your opening message should be, and with shaky thumbs, you type out something simple. Much to your friend’s (and your own) disappointment, you eventually settle on hey handsome. 
sh: hiiiiiiiiiii
For a while, you watch as Sunghoon types and stops and types and stops before his message comes through. 
sh: pretty
You can’t help the giggle that comes out, clearing your throat when Chaewon raises a brow at you. The two of you hold eye contact for a beat before erupting into a fit of laughter. 
you: i haven’t seen you at the pool in a while and i was wondering if you’re ok..
sh: yn.. have you been at my workplac e waiitng for me to show up again ???
you: are you ok.
sh: i think it’s cute that you did that, my friends tol d me they saw you there every day this week
you: why are your friends reporting my whereabouts to you..
sh: i asked them to, also im good i just took some days off
sh: back monday am i gonna see u then?
you: or we could just see each other on one of your off days?
On the left side of the screen, you watch animated ellipses dance above the keyboard before halting, though no message comes to replace them and it doesn’t take you long to figure out that the message hasn’t come through because your phone is frozen. 
Right?
You let out a laugh at your stupidity while Chaewon looks at you like you’re insane, turning off your phone and letting it sit for a bit before turning it back on. Wasting no time, you go straight to Instagram and pull up the DM thread where the word seen sits underneath your last message, laughing at you. 
Perplexed by what seems like your first rejection ever, you’re not quite sure how to move on so you send a text to the group chat (mainly for Yunjin, the only one who isn’t present). Yunjin replies with a message suggesting Sunghoon’s phone died. In the chair opposite, Chaewon suggests maybe he died. Jaehyun brings you more shots to cope with your heartache and you clutch your stomach laughing when he squirts lime juice into his eye.
Because your friends don’t respect you, you end up in the middle seat when the Uber arrives; sandwiched between Chaewon and Kazuha, drinking as much vodka as you can stomach from the younger girl’s flask while she mutters March 5th, Taurus over and over again. 
All that hard work was done in vain, though; when you reach the club Kazuha insists on being the first to go up in line, and tears start streaming when the bouncer asks what part of Seoul she was born in. Yeri’s ID gets confiscated and the four of you pile into another Uber and head to your backup plan, which you only learn about when the car pulls up.
Living in another city for uni means you’ve never partied with Sunghoon’s friends before — beyond walking by each other in a club — and some combination of excitement and alcohol makes your stomach heat up as you think about seeing him again.
Nishimura Riki’s family home is a giant structure that takes up more room than what’s probably necessary. There’s a massive fountain in the middle of the driveway shooting a stream, out of the mouth of what you think is a lion, into its main bed of water. The grand front door has banners criss-crossed over it saying HAPPY BIRTHDAY KIM SUNOO! Before you reach it, the door swings open and Jay’s jaw is even sharper than you remember when you see him so close. He grins at you and your friends, whooping obnoxiously at the sight of Jaehyun, dapping him up before waving awkwardly at you, Chaewon and Kazuha. You watch him lean over to Jaehyun and ask if that chick’s okay, while not so subtly pointing at the youngest of you all. 
When you look at her, black streaks of mascara tear through her blush like a knife though she wears a bright smile as she eyes Jay like a predator. You nudge her in the ribs and make a mental note to find a bathroom to help her fix her makeup. She frowns when you take her hand and enter the house, leaving Chaewon with Jaehyun and Jay, the three of which chat easily with one another.
Upstairs in the main bathroom, you kneel on the floor between Kazuha’s legs, gently running a makeup wipe over her face while she sits on the lid of the toilet babbling about Jay. “He’s the one,” she says determinedly. “I mean, he was worried about me.. he barely knows me and he was asking if I was okay. Like, how did he know I’d been upset?” You wonder if Kazuha has seen her face in the last half hour. Or if she knows why you insisted on taking her makeup off. 
“Right,” you nod, knowing it’s easier to agree with a drunk Kazuha than face an argument.
“It’s a feeling. Like, sometimes you just have to look through the eyes of your soul, and everything will work out.”
It’s amazing to you that she can say the things she says without laughing. But there’s a finality in her tone that makes you hope she’s right. 
With Kazuha all cleaned up, you’re able to focus on how crammed the house actually is. There are people in every room of the house, sitting on the porch, in the backyard. People are everywhere and you’re not sure you’ll ever manage to reunite with your friends. In favour of getting to know Jay, Kazuha presses a kiss to your cheek and runs off in the opposite direction. You head for the kitchen knowing that Chaewon will most likely be in there somewhere, batting her lashes at a tall graduate in hopes to score a free smoke. 
People are grinding and hanging off one another in the hall and the living room, making out by the stairs, and in what looks like the only empty spot in the kitchen Sunghoon leans against the counter, taking generous gulps from something in a red cup. Judging by his smart trousers and pretty black cardigan, Sunghoon has also developed a personal style in the time since you’ve last been home. A dent forms in Sunghoon’s cheek when he sees you, a sweet crinkle in his eyes as he says hi! 
You can’t figure out whether you should hug him or not but he looks so sweet with his wide smile and flushed cheeks that your arms widen of their own accord. His embrace is gentle, wrapping you up in a mixture of toned arms, soft cotton, liquor, and something light, floral, you think. 
“Can I fix you something to drink?” Sunghoon asks quietly, you only just hear him before he lets you go. “I didn’t think you’d be here tonight,” he says, reaching over the counter to grab a cup for you. 
“Yeah, I didn’t either.” 
“I was your backup plan?” 
“Oh, come on.” You nudge his shoulder with your hand as he screws the cap back on a bottle of lemonade. “I wouldn’t use those words. If I’d known about the party you would’ve been the plan.” 
“I thought you wouldn’t use those words.”
“You’re using those words,” you say, grinning when he laughs. 
You both go back and forth on it for a while, as Sunghoon tries to find Malibu in the mess of bottles cluttering the countertop. A wide grin spreads across his face when he does and you watch him fill the empty space in your cup before handing it to you. 
The first sip is syrupy sweet on your tongue, forcing an appreciative hum out of you. “So good,” you say through a dreamy sigh, shaking your head before taking another gulp. 
From his nose, he lets out a breathy laugh, his lips quirking up at the corners as he watches you. “It’s good to know my bartending classes are paying off.” 
“Have you ever considered a recipe book?” you ask, putting the cup down next to your phone, looking up at Sunghoon who seems to seriously consider this for a while before nodding. 
Almost experimentally, he rests his hand on your hip. “I’m sorry about earlier,” he tells you, holding you a little closer when he sees that you’re okay with it. 
You tilt your head at him, pretending not to remember the way he’d left you on read. “What happened earlier?” 
“On.. iMessage,” he starts, trailing off at the end though he continues when you nod. “I’m not good at talking to pretty girls.”
Despite not fully believing him, there’s a sincerity in his voice that makes your stomach flutter. “Lucky for you, I’m very good at talking to pretty boys.” 
You can’t tell if he’s flustered or drunk, but his cheeks redden after you speak. 
“Pretty boys, me?” 
“Who else?” 
Sunghoon’s laugh comes out in ha ha ha’s, and if you couldn’t see the way his eyes crinkled up you might have thought he was faking it.
For a moment, his gaze flickers between your eyes and mouth, his tongue darts out to wet his lips, and he speaks. “I don’t want you thinking I’m not interested or anything.” His voice is low, almost too quiet for the cramped space where Me and Your Mama bounces off the walls and rowdy kids constantly bump into you. 
With his hand still burning through your dress, he nudges you, turning you both around to take your place. Your ass rests against the edge of the countertop and the drunk students bump into him instead. “I’m just.. still figuring out how to stop being so shy all the time,” he says, using his thumb to lift the fallen strap of your dress.
You’re having a tough time believing him. If this is what being so shy looks like for Sunghoon, you’re terrified to see him being confident. 
The heat of his lingering hand against your bare shoulder only leaves you drawing a blank. Part of you feels silly for saying that you’re very good at talking to pretty boys. You’re way out of your depth right now.
“But you,” he trails off, looking between your eyes and lips again. His hand starts to tremble against your waist. “You make it so hard.” 
“I do?” you ask dumbly, at a complete loss for words, trying not to read too much into his word choice. Why, anyone could say that word, hard, and not mean anything by it, it’s a word after all. An adjective, you think. 
Get out of your head. 
“Mm,” Sunghoon nods solemnly. “You have no idea.”
Three people nudge past you, each one shoving into him harder than the last; he looks thankful when you suggest going outside. His fingers brush against yours before he pulls them away, turning around to head for the garden immediately. 
The smell of smoke spikes through the fresh air, strong enough to make your head swim as Sunghoon closes the back door behind you. “Wow,” you whisper, looking around. It’s like stepping into a whole new party, with slow R&B pumping out into the summer heat. The garden spills out way beyond what your eyes can see, glowing with twinkling fairy lights and excited chatter.
“I know, right.” 
There’s a two step staircase in the centre that you follow Sunghoon up, mumbling an apology to the couple whose makeout sesh you had to break up to do so. Both of your footsteps crunch against the stone path that splits the grass, and — at Sunghoon’s request — you tell him everything that led you to this party tonight. Leaving out all of the overthinking that went into the text you eventually sent him of course.
“Wait, how old is Kazuha?” 
“21, she’s just waiting on her new ID coming in the mail.” 
“What happened to her old one?” 
“I think she’s like.. 13 or something in her old photo, and we didn’t get in last week either ‘cause the bouncer didn’t think it was her,” you pause. “Or she just looked too young in the photo. I’m not sure.”
You can hear Sunghoon humming along to the SZA song that’s playing, tilting his head at your words. His brows knit together for a beat, and he has to grab you by the forearm to keep you from tripping over your own feet. Sunghoon’s eyes meet yours, as he maintains his grip on you. “Thanks,” you say through a breath, trying to focus on anything other than his touch. 
“Let’s sit, yeah?” 
Sunghoon rests his arm around your shoulders when you nod, keeping you upright as you walk slowly towards the back of the garden. “I don’t know where you guys go out, but one time, we put Riki in a dress and gave him Hwang Yeji’s ID.”
“And then stayed home?” The mental image makes you cackle, getting funnier with each second you dwell on it, but your breath catches in your throat when you look up at him, shaking his head as best as he can while laughing. The way his head falls back, showing off the column of his neck and angle of his jaw forces you to screw your eyes shut to stop the thoughts of kissing him there. 
“And then took him to the club with us and got him to buy our first round.”
With each thing he shares about that night, it grows more and more unbelievable, leaving your jaw on the floor as he leads you around a timber shed (that houses a hot tub) to a big swingy chair thing. “I’ll find the photos in a sec,” he smiles. “Let me hold your cup while you sit.” 
The spot provides about as much privacy as you figure a packed house party could afford. Not that you need privacy to be endeared by Sunghoon or anything. You take him up on his offer, sitting down and watching as he ignores the phone ringing in his pocket, handing you back your drink. Even though you’re not thrilled about the interruption, you tell him he should at least check who it is. 
“Jungwon?” He flinches, yanking the phone away from his ear. Jungwon’s voice is so loud you can hear him despite the distance. “Yeah I got it, I’m at the swing outside.” The call ends there and Sunghoon still doesn’t sit down and neither of you speaks. 
Blinking fairy lights are strung neatly around the swing’s frame. Only a few of the bulbs are working, but together they produce enough light for you to see the sun-bleached blue of the cushion you’re sitting on, and the way Sunghoon’s looking straight at you. You smile. He doesn’t budge. Instead, he worries his bottom lip with his teeth for a while, completely spaced out, until a broad-shouldered child arrives. 
Sunghoon daps him up and your brows raise when he pulls a short, flat bottle of vodka from his back pocket to give to Jungwon. “How much do I owe you?” he asks, taking the bottle. 
“For the drink or for the lifelong tab you and Riki have been racking up?” 
Chuckling, Jungwon shakes his head and points his thumb at Sunghoon. “Don’t you just love that sense of humour?”
The two boys share a look, and Jungwon nods in understanding. He affectionately pats Sunghoon’s bicep, face lighting up in awe. “Wow!” he gasps, turning to glance at you. “Have you felt the muscles on this guy? I wanna be just like him when I grow up.” With wide eyes, he nudges Sunghoon in your direction. 
Despite his apparent indifference towards Jungwon’s attempts at hyping him up, Sunghoon comes closer to you, letting you feel his arm anyway. He flexes his bicep — all firm, sculpted muscle through his soft cardigan — under your fingers in a way that spreads fire in your stomach. Unintentionally, you catch his gaze and your breath gets stuck in your throat. A quiet laugh slips from his lips as he puts his arm down. 
It’s hard not to think about what Jungwon had said about growing up, and even harder not to study him to figure out his age. His outfit is similar to Sunghoon’s; loose pants and a knitted cardigan which does nothing to help you make an estimate. Not being able to buy his own booze tells you that he’s not your age, his wide eyes and round cheeks only make him seem like a child, but his height and broad shoulders throw you off.
“How old are you?” you ask, giving in to your curiosity. 
“21,” he says, too quickly. “.. in two years.” 
He lingers for a bit to hype Sunghoon up some more; not so subtly bringing up his great qualities, like his considerate nature and unwavering dedication. Though Sunghoon’s “never ending” patience wears out and he asks him to leave. With a nod, Jungwon waves goodbye before sprinting back towards the house. Sunghoon laughs watching his friend and sinks into the seat next to you, his thigh pressing against yours for a beat before he closes his legs and rests his arms over the back of the chair.
“Wow,” you grin, leaning into his side. “Figure skating legend Park Sunghoon buys alcohol for kids.” 
He shrugs. “I’m not a legend.” 
You raise a brow, a smirk playing at your lips. “That’s the part you’re disputing?”
“Well, the other part is true,” he says, chuckling though unable to hide the flash of discomfort in his eyes. “If you consider a 19-year-old a kid.” 
“You’re way too humble.”
“Anyone could be good with the right coach, and I have, like, the most supportive parents ever so they help me a lot.”  
“Well, yeah, probably, but even then, your parents aren’t the ones skating, you are,” you point out. 
Sunghoon deflates, sighing heavily. “Can we talk about something else?” He takes a sip from his cup in a silent plea for you to drop it. When his eyes meet yours, his lips press into a flat smile and the soft lighting brings out the dimple in his cheek. 
You nod, using your hand to push his hair away from his forehead. The flat smile spreads across his face as you play with his light hair, that’s somehow silky smooth under your fingers despite the bleach. It’s a little messy when you move your hand, sitting over his thick brows in a way that, when paired with his boyish grin, makes him look younger. 
A dull thump startles both of you as a couple jog away from the shed with linked hands and no regard for you or Sunghoon. Neither of you bother trying to hide your amusement when you meet each other’s eyes, laughing hard enough to make the swing sway. 
“I’m sorry,” you say after calming down — maybe too late. 
He shakes his head. “You don’t have to be.”
The smile on his face is soft, sincere, but does nothing for the guilt you feel over stressing him out — your lips tug into a frown.
“Hey,” Sunghoon whispers and his forehead is warm against yours when he nudges you, grinning at the way you giggle when he pulls away. “I’m not upset or anything.” he pauses. “I don’t think I’m upset or anything, I’m just tired, you know. I spend a lot of time talking about skating during the day and there’s, like, a million and one other things I’d rather talk about right now.”
His honesty assuages your guilt and piques your curiosity. “Yeah?” you ask, arching a brow. Sunghoon nods. “Other things like..” 
He hesitates, caught off by the suggestiveness in your tone, by the way your hand grazes his knee before resting low on his thigh. A gulp echoes in his throat. “Uh, like..” His voice trails off. 
There’s a flutter in your chest as a smile tugs at your lips. “Why don’t we start with those pictures of Riki at the club?” 
“Riki at the club,” he repeats, nodding his head. “I can do that.” 
Sunghoon’s arm falls around your shoulders when you nestle into him, close enough now that his scent hits you effortlessly. A tiny square in his camera roll expands under his thumb, showing you Riki in a tight black halter dress with his hair grown out and styled in neat curls. There’s a boxy grin spread across his lips while he holds Yeji’s ID next to his face. In the next picture, he crouches between Shin Ryujin and Lee Chaeryeong while the three of them make kissy faces for the camera. “And then he had two shots of Fireball and passed out in a booth so we had to carry him home.” 
A laugh bubbles in your throat at the sight of Riki hunched over in a booth with his head on the table, and tears start to spill when you watch the video of Heeseung stumbling down the street, accidentally letting Riki slip off his back and onto the concrete. 
Out of nowhere, Sunghoon’s eyes practically bulge out of his head; an expression you’ve only seen on Kazuha whenever she suspects she left her flat iron on at home. Dread settles in your stomach as you brace yourself for what he might say next. “Just give me a minute,” he says, his words holding an urgency that only fuels your nerves. “I need to text someone.” 
Sunghoon thinking about talking to someone else while you’re trying to get to know him isn’t your favourite thing. In fact, it feels worse than what you imagine might happen if Kazuha actually does leave her flat iron on one day — because it shuts off automatically after 15 minutes.
You try hiding your disappointment but you can feel your lips drooping at the corners as he angles his phone away from you, deep in thought about this message he so urgently has to send. Whatever, you think. Couldn’t care less.
At long last, he finishes typing and pulls air through his teeth before putting his phone back in his pocket, drumming his nails against the seat until your phone goes off in your lap. In a fit of Kazuha-inspired absurdity, you want Sunghoon to feel bad about his lack of manners, so you ignore the notification despite your burning curiosity.
“Aren’t you gonna get that?” he asks, his gaze fixed on you expectantly. 
You shake your head. “It can wait.” 
A frown creases Sunghoon’s brow and you hate it; checking your phone immediately to find two texts from the boy sitting next to you.
sh: hey yn! sorry i took so long
sh: if it’s not too late do u wNt to go on a date with me next saturday?
After six days of exchanging Spotify links with Sunghoon over text, Saturday rolls around, and the doorbell chimes earlier than you’d been expecting it to. You call out that you’ll get the door, grab your bag and bolt down the stairs. With a hand on the door handle, you catch your breath, an act that seems pointless when you see Sunghoon through the glass. The door creaks open and his neck snaps in your direction, jaw falling to the floor. 
He waves. 
Your greeting is followed only by silence, your Hey, Sunghoon, dissipating into the sticky summer heat as he chews on his cheek, letting his eyes scan your body over and over. If he didn’t look so nervous you might have offered to pose for a picture. “How are you?” you ask, locking the door behind you and double-checking that you did lock it before tossing your keys into your purse. 
“You’re so pretty,” he sighs, pushing his hand through his hair. “And I love your dress,” he adds. “Very pretty.”
“Yeah?”
Sunghoon nods and suddenly, your group FaceTime call with Chaewon, Minjeong, and Yunjin feels like two hours well spent. 
While you tried on every summer outfit in your wardrobe for them to judge, Minjeong gave enthusiastic reactions to Sunghoon’s tagged photos, or, rather, to Mark in Sunghoon’s tagged photos but even she was struck by the outfit you settled on. The pretty floral dress that sits at the middle of your thighs that Sunghoon can’t seem to look away from. Hopefully, you’ll remember to thank them appropriately. 
You follow him to his car where he opens the passenger door for you. Struck by the fact that this is the first time anyone’s done that for you, and the sound of his hand rattling against the metal, you sit down, beaming up at him as he closes the door. Sunghoon’s car is neat, and tidy, and smells pleasantly of the new car scent Little Tree that hangs, completely still, from his rearview mirror. Through the clean windscreen, you watch him walk around the front of the car with pursed lips. 
“You like ice cream, right?” he asks when he sits down, looking over at you nervously. 
“Who doesn’t like ice cream?” 
Sunghoon takes you to a little old diner themed ice cream spot with checkerboard floors and a handful of plush vinyl booths. Some of the walls have cursive LED signs that you can’t quite make out and a great big jukebox in the back corner plays What Makes You Beautiful. 
It doesn’t surprise you that Sunghoon is quiet when it’s just you guys, but you can tell that he’s trying his best. He listens attentively to everything you have to say, nodding his head and asking thoughtful questions at all the right times; he makes you laugh more than you ever have. He practically lights up when you bring up his friends. 
“Your friends are so cute,” you say with a smile, thinking of the change Riki had given Yunjin to buy those slushys the other day. 
“If you knew my friends you wouldn’t think that,” Sunghoon says, a fond smile that goes against his words spreading on his face at the mention of them. “Except Jake,” he corrects. “Jake is so cute, yes.” 
“I don’t think I know which one he is,” you admit. “I know Heeseung, I know Jay, Jungwon, and Riki..” you trail off, looking up at him and the smudge of ice cream on his lower lip.
“Jake is the cute one,” he frowns. “You’ll know him when I show you.” Sunghoon takes his phone from his pocket, scrolling for a while. “I’m sorry, I can’t find a normal photo of all seven of us.” 
“Just show me whatever,” you say, looking up at him and the smudge of ice cream on his bottom lip.
Without thinking, you reach over the table, using your thumb to wipe it away. Sunghoon’s cheeks immediately flush with pink and he gulps watching you suck the ice cream from the pad of your finger.
“Thanks,” he mumbles, shy, while turning his phone towards you to show the most absurdly staged photograph you think you’ve ever seen. “So, uh, Jake is.. he’s the one holding Heeseung up by his hair, and Sunoo’s posing in front of Jay.” Sunghoon hands you his phone when he’s done talking.
You use the opportunity to examine the picture. 
Jake (so cute) really does hold Heeseung up by his hair, and Sunoo (also so cute) shows the camera his pretty side profile and a thumbs up. Some other things stick out to you in the photo, a laugh making its way out of you as you notice that Jungwon isn’t there but Jay holds up a printed picture of him in his right hand. Riki sits between Jay and Jake, wearing a concerned expression about something going on off-camera. Sunghoon is in the back, holding what looks like a yoga pose on the back of the couch they’re sitting on. 
Happily, you let Sunghoon tell you more about his friends until the sun starts to set and the backs of your thighs stick to the vinyl seat. Not quite ready to say goodbye, you ask Sunghoon if you can go on a walk together. He seems into the idea, nodding his head and smiling down at you. 
Walking aimlessly, the two of you maintain a neutral silence (not uncomfortable, not particularly comfortable either, just quiet), and pretend not to notice the way the backs of your hands touch, each bump longer than the last though amounting to nothing. 
It’s not until comforted by the smell of chemically treated water that you realise how close to the pool you are. You follow Sunghoon around a corner and see the locked gates, wondering if he’d brought you this way on purpose or just out of habit. 
“Wish it was open,” you say off-handedly, not really meaning anything by it. Like telling the person you sit beside on the first day of class that you’re so tired even though you had the best night of sleep in your life. 
Sunghoon isn’t beside you when you look over at him, he’s a few paces behind you, standing by the gates. A mischievous smile spreads on his lips as he holds his keys in his hand, dangling them. “It could be.” 
“Are we allowed to do this?” you ask nervously, watching Sunghoon twist his key in the lock. 
“Allowed to?” he repeats, tilting his head as though the concept is foreign to him. “No, I don’t think so.” A satisfying click sounds as the lock comes undone and Sunghoon pushes the gate open with a huge grin on his face as he gestures for you to go inside first. “After you.” 
He follows you in, shutting the gate behind him and holding out a hand for you to take; you lock your fingers with his and decide that you never want to let go. Not even after a thin layer of sweat forms between your palms. 
The space seems so large when it’s empty like this, with the parasols closed and the lack of screaming children. Streetlights cover the area in a dim orange haze, turning it into a fuzzy dreamscape. The pool itself seems so small when you see it covered up, nothing like the ocean-wide abyss you remember it being when you were young, racing with Chaewon, or pretending like you were only playing around when you tried to drown Jaehyun. 
“Do you wanna get in?” Sunghoon asks, his soft voice interrupting your thoughts. 
You don’t hesitate to nod. 
One night a week, the pool stays open until after dark, but you’ve never been. So when the mechanised pool cover whirs open after Sunghoon flips the switch, you’re shocked by the lights that illuminate the still water. It makes sense that the pool would have some form of lighting for safety, but you hadn’t expected the yellowing fixtures set in the tiled walls to shine so beautifully.
“Come on,” he says, taking you by the hand again, approaching the water. 
A part of you wants to protest when he lets go, but the words catch in your throat as he pulls his shirt over his head. Having spent the better part of most summers poolside, the sight of shirtless Sunghoon isn’t a new one though you find yourself breathless all the same. It’s different tonight but he doesn’t seem to notice. 
Worried you’ll break the spell, you can’t bring yourself to speak. Worried you’ll open your mouth and the moment might slip out from under you. These worries, however, are no match for Sunghoon’s slim waist which leaves your mouth forming an O at the sight. 
“Wow,” you whisper, awestruck. 
Sunghoon laughs, nervously, running a hand through his hair and using the other to hold his shirt over his stomach. “Don’t do that,” he says under his breath. He drops the shirt. The rest of his clothes follow, quickly leaving him in only his tight-fitting black boxer briefs that you struggle to look away from. 
An odd feeling starts to creep in, causing a fire in your belly — obviously from the sweet cider you had earlier, nothing at all to do with Sunghoon. Or his sculpted torso. Or his face, with his soft smile, and sparkling eyes. No one’s ever looked at you like this before.
“What are you thinking about?” 
Those shoulders. Those lips. Kissing those lips. You gulp. “Nothing.” 
Even though he doesn’t look like he believes you, he doesn’t press you on it. Instead, he smiles. Sunghoon turns his back to you, walking towards the pool’s edge to dip a pointed toe into the water. You like the way he hums, nodding his head as if it’s just to his liking. 
“Feels good?”
“Perfect,” he grins, stepping into the pool. 
A splash makes the water ripple around him — you’ve never noticed it’s so clear, you can see everything. From the mosaic-like blue tiles on the pool floor and walls to the way Sunghoon’s hair moves around his head. It’s a dazzling blue, shifting brilliantly through the whole spectrum under light from the moon, the pool, and the lampposts. 
Considering the way you’re sweating in the sticky heat, the water even looks refreshing, so you’re not sure why you don’t move to pull your dress off; or why you can’t shake your nerves. Sunghoon’s seen you in skin-tight dresses, and skimpy bikinis, so you’re not sure why the thought of him seeing you in your underwear is spooking you so much. It could be your lack of a bra. But even then, Sunghoon isn’t going to be the first person to see your bare breasts.
Interrupting your thoughts, he bobs to the surface with closed eyes and straight lips; his dimple shows. Pushing hair from his forehead, he asks if you’re going to join him though he seems to sense your apprehension, shaking his head. “You don’t have to take anything off,” he tells you gently. “Except maybe your shoes and socks.” 
You nod, stepping out of your shoes and pulling your socks off almost robotically. 
“It’s okay,” he smiles, comforting, reassuring, as he swims up to the edge of the pool and extends his wet hand to you. “I got you.”
You tell yourself to get out of your head, looking into Sunghoon’s sparkling eyes and feeling at ease from the way he looks up at you like you’re God’s gift. When you reach for the bottom of your dress, he gulps, his arm falling limply against the coping. You turn away from him to pull the light fabric over your head, letting it fall in a heap next to your shoes, and Sunghoon’s looking in the other direction when you turn back around. Even with the ‘privacy’ he’s afforded you by looking away, you can’t help but use your arms to cover your chest as you make your way over to the pool, sitting down on the edge and slipping into the water. 
It is refreshing. The water is the perfect temperature as it envelops you, soothes you.
Just more than an arm’s length away, Sunghoon’s form is broad. His shoulders are so wide and his back so toned that your head starts to swim. His skin, sunkissed, glowing, is dotted with pretty moles that you’ve never noticed before but can’t look away from — suddenly feeling as though you could point to each one with your eyes closed. 
With an odd half step, you reach him, letting your arms fall around his waist and pressing your chest to his back. You don’t know why you do that.
He draws a sharp breath. “Hi,” he whispers after a beat. 
“Hi.” 
A quiet falls between you until Sunghoon mumbles, over there, while pointing towards the deep end of the pool. You swim poorly behind him and he only stops when you call out his name. Sunghoon breaks out into laughter when he sees you. For him, who’s well into the deep end, the, now still, water might tease his chin if disrupted. For you, almost 2 metres behind, the water tickles your nose even when you stand on your tiptoes.
“Whoa,” he whispers. 
You tilt your head back to speak. “What?” 
“You’re just..” He pauses to gulp. “So short.”  
Offended, you scoff. “I’m the tallest out of all my friends,” you say defensively. And untruthfully — hoping he’s never seen you standing next to Yunjin.
“Are you friends with the Lakers?”
You drift away from him, laughing as well, until the water just about reaches your armpits. He follows you. As more of his body breaches the surface, water slips from his chest, droplets and streaks glowing under the white light of the moon, completely breathtaking.
“I was so nervous about today,” he says, pushing some water towards you, his lighthearted tone gone. 
“Oh?” You pause, continuing when he nods, and push water back in his direction. “How do you feel now?” 
Sunghoon’s pouty lips jerk up the corners, playful, boyish. A soft laugh slips from the space between his teeth. “I’m absolutely terrified.” His honesty draws you to him, and has you actually drifting closer in the water.
“What’s scaring you?” 
His breath seems to catch in his throat. He tilts his head while eyeing you. “Are you asking because you really don’t know?” If you’d still been splashing each other you doubt you’d have heard him talking over the water.
“Does it matter?”
Sunghoon seems to consider this for a moment, to consider you. Despite sitting just high enough to cover your breasts, the water doesn’t do very much to conceal them and his eyes get stuck on your chest for more than a little while. He clears his throat, looking back up at your face. He doesn’t answer. Instead, he raises his hands and smacks the surface of the water between you with open palms. A big splash hits you in the face. 
It’s on, you think, doing the same thing to him with all the force you can muster and laugh at the yelp he lets out. Something of a splash fight ensues, both of you doing everything you can to create a bigger mess of water to attack the other with. 
The rain starts so subtly that you don’t even notice it at first. You’re both too busy laughing and trying to splash the other harder to think about anything else. Only when you stop to catch your breath, to rest your aching arms, do you catch the faint ripples skating across the pool’s surface. Sunghoon doesn’t relent, taking the opportunity to gain the upper hand. And the rain gets heavy fast.
“Sunghoon, it’s raining, stop!” you call out, turning your face away from him. His raucous laughter makes your stomach flutter as you grab his wrist. “Come on, we’re gonna get wet, we have to go!” 
When you look back over at him, his smile is so wide, so sweet that you almost feel faint. Sunghoon doesn’t stop laughing, the sound is so contagious you can’t help but join in. His arms fall around your waist like it’s the most natural thing in the world to do while he cackles in front of you, you let your hands rest on his firm triceps. 
Large droplets start hitting your lashes, clinging to them, obscuring your vision, so you bring a hand up to act like an awning above your eyes. He calls you so cute under his breath though his laughter doesn’t seem like it’s going to stop anytime soon. 
“Hoon, come on. What’s so funny?”
The rain is cold against your shoulders but the boy in front of you doesn’t seem to share your concerns about the sudden downpour. You lock eyes with him, and his laughter seems to get caught in his throat. He’s still smiling but seems nervous, as though he’s only now become aware that he’s holding you so close that your naked chest is pressed against his. 
Sunghoon clears his throat. His smile returns, as a breathy laugh makes its way from his nose. He lets his face come down towards yours, slow, cautious, and too desperate to wait, you meet his lips halfway; they’re every bit as soft as you’d imagined. 
As if relieved, Sunghoon’s shoulders sag and his body seems to melt into your own. Desperation, hunger hits you from all angles, lighting up your insides and leaving your skin burning under his touch. Unthinkingly, you link your arms around his neck to pull him impossibly close, almost whimpering when his tongue grazes yours.
Sunghoon tastes light and sugary, like the perfect combination of artificial strawberry and sweet coffee as his tongue moves against yours. From your mouth into his slips a dreamy sigh, while he holds onto you gently, like you’re the most delicate thing in the world; like he’s the most delicate thing. Why haven’t you been kissed like this before? So slowly, so softly, as if he means it. As if he’s kissing you for no reason other than simply wanting to kiss you. 
Only when he pulls away to catch his breath do you regain your senses and notice how much heavier the rain has become. But your brain short circuits at the sight of him. His breathing is ragged, his chest rises and falls against yours. Water darkened hair clings to his forehead, letting beads slip from its ends to his cheekbone before slipping down the column of his neck.
Shelter is the only word you manage to say and all you can do is hope that he’s able to work out the rest. Like something from the purest depths of your imagination, Sunghoon’s kiss-bitten lips stretch into a wide smile. A giggle, the softest thing you’ve ever come across, slips from his mouth while his fingers squeeze at your hips. 
“YN,” he says, breathless. “We’re in the pool.”
Dripping water onto the concrete under your feet, you and Sunghoon walk at snail’s pace from his car to your front door, with your linked hands swinging between your bodies. 
The porch light diffuses dramatically over Sunghoon’s features, and somehow, even under the stark lighting, he’s still beautiful. His wet hair drips water onto his shoulders, darkening his shirt in abstract splashes around the neckline. A grin splits across his lips when he locks eyes with you, his face scrunching up and his shoulders racking up and down as he laughs to himself. 
It’s impossible not to join in. “What’s so funny?” 
He only shrugs in response, struggling to keep a straight face. “I’m just.. happy,” he says eventually, a tinge of uncertainty hanging from his words. 
With shaking hands, Sunghoon grabs you by the waist and holds you close, leaning down to kiss you. As your lips move with his, the only thing you can think about is how badly you want to feel this moment forever. To feel the tremble in sweet Sunghoon’s hands as he holds onto you gently, to feel his soft hair under your fingertips, and his hard chest pressed against your body. To feel his lips curving into a smile, his forehead resting on yours as his breath fans your lips. “Are you happy too?” he asks. 
You think you’ll die if you ever forget the way it feels to like Park Sunghoon.
“Yes. Very.” 
Through the peephole in your front door, you watch as Sunghoon stands outside, bringing a hand to his cheek, fingers grazing the spot where you’re certain your lip gloss lingers. You suppress a giggle with your hand and run up the stairs to your room where you bury your face in your pillow to muffle a squeal. You can’t remember the last time you felt so giddy over something that was happening in your own life rather than something sweet you’d read in a book or heard about from a friend.
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With Chaewon’s hand in yours, and butterflies in your stomach, you make your way to the community pool for the first time in about a week. Like always, you find Sunghoon’s friends wreaking havoc in the water until.. something happens. By the time it occurs, you’ve been laying poolside for about an hour, trying to convince your best friend that you liking a guy isn’t going to do anything to your friendship. 
“You’re not supposed to like that guy,” Chaewon whines like a child, playing with the frayed hem of her shorts. “You’re only supposed to like me!” A sigh passes from her lips as she uses her arm to shield her eyes from the sun. “And Yunjin!” she adds after too long. 
“What about the rest of our friends?” 
“And Kazuha, and Minjeong, and Jaehyun, an—” 
“Jaehyun’s a guy.” 
She seems a little thrown off by your interruption, pursing her lips before speaking. “Well, yeah, but.. he’s one of our guys. A Chaewon-approved guy.” 
Suddenly, the noise level reduces by at least half and you can’t help but feel alarmed, whipping your head in the direction of the pool. A quick scan tells you that nothing bad has happened, allowing you to release a breath you didn’t know you were holding. In the corner of your eye, you see Sunghoon’s friends huddled together and quickly realise that the space has only gotten so quiet because they’re chatting at a normal volume. Huh, you think, it almost sounds like the speakers are quite good. Heeseung and Jay get out of the water, sitting up on the pool’s edge while the other four boys all stand in place, all six of them fix their eyes on something in front of them but you don’t care enough to investigate further. 
You look back at Chaewon as a pout settles on your lips. “Why can’t Chaewon approve of my guy?”
“When you say that Sunghoon is your guy, do you mean it in the same way that Yeonjun is your guy?” she asks, her tone scathing but her face concerned. “Or, the way that Asahi is your guy, or, even Yoshi?” 
“No. This is different. Sunghoon is different.” 
You know how trite and naive you must sound, but he is different. You’d never dated a guy who’d pick you up right at your front door; Yeonjun and Yoshi typically sent DMs to let you know they’d parked out front, and Asahi did nothing but honk the car horn because he found it funny. Though to call what you were doing with those guys ‘dating’ would be a huge overstatement. There was Renjun from first year who was nice enough but never wanted to hang out, and Donghyuck who made you laugh but never complimented you. 
Chaewon crinkles her nose, reaching out to hold your hand, giving it a reassuring squeeze. “I really hope you’re right.”
And now there’s Sunghoon. Sunghoon who tells you that he can’t wait to see you again; who always tells you how pretty you look; who blushes when you hold his hand, who touches his cheek when you kiss it. You can’t imagine him doing anything bad to anyone. Sunghoon is different, and you hope you can be different this time too. In all the time you spend thinking, your guy shows up with a shy smile on his face with both of his hands behind his back. 
It’s your first time seeing him in person since your date and the sun glows against his skin, his wet hair tickling his thick brows as he stands at the foot of your chairs, watching Chaewon nervously. “Hi, Chaewon,” he says after a while.
“Hello!” She grins, seeming so bright and happy that you find it hard to reconcile this Chaewon with the one who’d been clutching her chest and sliding down the walls over the fact you have a crush on the boy she’s now being so pleasant to. 
“I got this,” Sunghoon says, bringing his hand from behind his back to reveal a strawberry-flavoured slushy. “For you.” He adds on, holding the drink out to your friend. While Chaewon gushes about how much she likes the mix of berries that make up her favourite flavour, Sunghoon hums and nods along while making his way to the other side of your chair. He wears a wider, more confident smile on his face while he stands over you. 
“Hi, gorgeous,” he says quietly, bringing his other hand out to give you the blue raspberry slushy he’s been holding. With his foot, Sunghoon drags a spare lounger from behind him next to yours before moving out of the way and using his hands to push it some more, making the armrest touch yours. “Hey,” he smiles, taking a seat. 
You take a grateful sip of your drink, surprised at how much better it tastes coming from him. “Thank you, Hoon.” You can’t stop yourself from leaning over to press a kiss to his cheek, liking the way your stomach flutters when his hand flies up to touch the spot you’d kissed.
“I like when you do that.” 
“This?” you ask, kissing him again. Through squinted eyes, you notice a dusting of pink over his cheeks and take such a big sip of your slushy that every single part of your body goes numb and your head starts to hurt. Sunghoon only laughs, watching you. It’s quiet between you for a bit until you come to. “I’m not complaining, really, but don’t you have.. lives to guard?” 
“I’m on break,” he says. “Do you want me to go?” His brows raise dramatically as the corners of his lips sink to the floor, a glint of something playful in his sparkling eyes. 
You shake your head, face alighting with a grin when you remember something. “So can I see the skating videos you promised you’d show me?” 
All playfulness is gone. “Did I.. promise?” 
“Yes!” You don’t like the way he arches his brow at you. “Two nights ago.. before you fell asleep on the phone.” 
He scoffs at you, playfully. “If I remember correctly, you fell asleep on the phone,” Sunghoon says, tone accusatory. “And you snore.” Sunghoon lets his cheek lie flat against the chair, grinning. He’s beautiful. And correct.
“Skating videos,” you repeat. Sunghoon rolls his eyes at you, grinning brilliantly when you laugh. “I’m serious,” you frown. 
“You’re cute,” he says quietly, like it’s a correction. “I’ve been meaning to ask you something.” Sunghoon pauses but takes your nod as a sign to continue. “I have a thing, next Tuesday, and I was wondering if you’d want to come and see me skate in person?” His voice tips up at the end of the question.
Excitement bubbles up inside you, causing you to sit up straight in your seat, turning your body to face him. “You want me to come?” 
He nods eagerly. 
“I’ll be there.” 
The tips of Sunghoon’s ears redden as he smiles at you, his eyes scanning your face. You can’t resist kissing him, and he doesn’t try to stop you, meeting your lips halfway. It’s sweet as sugar and goes on until his friends start to cheer loudly and Sunghoon pulls away, shy. But he looks like he wants to kiss you again. You grab him by the cord of the whistle around his neck and pull him back towards you. Relief floods you when your lips reunite.
“I’m gonna text you later with the details, time and shit,” he mumbles against your lips before getting up to go. 
As he retreats, he looks over his shoulder a few times, waving at you and smiling widely while he does. Until he bumps into a small child who practically topples over; Sunghoon manages to catch them in the nick of time and his neck flushes pink. 
It doesn’t make sense to you how he could be so cute. 
Chaewon watches you as she sips her slushy with an appreciative smile, letting out a long ahh of refreshment before putting the cup down. “Chaewon approved.” 
It seems like your mother’s been back from work for a while when you get home. A stretchy white headband holds her hair out of her face while she stands over a pot on the stove, looking comfy in some sweatpants.
Happy to see you, she pulls you into a hug, pressing a kiss to your cheek. “Hi, honey,” she grins. 
She turns down your offer to help and insists on you setting the table instead, which you do happily, taking a seat when you’re done. Through her phone, she plays the music she listened to while you were growing up and sitting there, watching your mum cook while dripping chlorinated water from your hair to the kitchen floor, makes you feel a bit like a child. Like it’s 2008 and you’ve come home from a day at the pool with Chaewon, who would sit across from you at the dinner table, all blunt fringe and missing teeth, talking about this brand new thing called cheesecake, while your mother made dinner for the three of you with a towel wrapped on her head, drying her wet hair. 
As your mum fills your plate, she tells you about her day at work. Her boss was unreasonable, like always, and her office bestie took off on maternity leave. Again. She asks you about your day and pretends like she doesn’t notice the way you smile when you talk about the pool. 
You don’t wait to tell her about Sunghoon. 
“Is that who you went out with last week?” 
You cough around a grain of rice; you don’t remember mentioning him. “How do you know?” 
A smile takes over her face. “Because I watched him stand around the driveway for five minutes before he rang the bell.” You can’t help the way you laugh, it sounds like him to a tee. “What’s he like?” 
You tilt your head for a minute, thinking. “I still feel like we’re getting to know each other, you know?” Understanding, she nods her head. So, naturally, you talk for the better part of 10 minutes about Sunghoon until your food gets cold and your cheeks hurt from smiling. 
In preparation for Sunghoon’s skating showcase, you read up on the sport and audience etiquette, and stay up late the night before making a pretty banner for him. Sleepiness plagues you when you wake up that afternoon but at least you’re happy with the way the sign came out. 
While doing your makeup, you start to second guess your outfit choice. It was nice when you picked it last week, and it was nice when you put it on an hour ago and then back on twenty minutes ago. So, out of options, you stand in front of the mirror for the umpteenth time, sending Sunghoon a picture of your flowy off-white dress and asking if it’s okay. 
Sunghoon, dramatic as ever, responds with a selfie, all pretty smile and red hearts drawn over his eyes. You almost want to drop dead at the sight of him. And then another message comes through, no words, just emojis. At least 40 silly little yellow faces fill the text box. Some are crying, some have heart eyes, some have starry eyes, and some are drooling. There seems to be no apparent order, and you see sprinkles of white hearts in between them. 
sh: you look so beautiful you’re so beautiful baby
Baby, he’d said. Simple, pixelated, enough to make your heart flip in your chest. 
sh: can i come over 
sh: just to loo k at you or smth 
you: please 
You want to kiss him. 
sh: ok omw .. lying i dont have time :((( 
sh: also i fucked up my hair last night don’t laugh when you see me. 
you: no promises .. 
There’s a short queue at the reception desk when you arrive at the rink. The lobby is full of excited parents and bored teens, all eager with anticipation for the start (and end) of the summer showcase. Sunghoon had been relatively vague about the event until you called him last night, with a list of questions about it. With one question about it. The two of you chatted and laughed for hours until you got an answer. 
When he’s not spending the day at the pool, Sunghoon volunteers to teach kids classes at the rink he grew up in. Every year, the teaching cycle runs from April to July, at which point the rink holds the summer showcase, for parents and family members to attend and see what they’ve been funding for the past four months. 
“We don’t normally let parents sit in on classes because it’s distracting for the kids,” he explained through a yawn. “And it’s the whole reason I started skating in the first place.” Sunghoon paused. You hadn’t been expecting him to stop speaking but you rubbed your eyes and mumbled oh, really? as you used a pencil to sketch out the outline of your bubble letters. “You know, at first I thought you fell asleep, but I didn’t hear you snoring so I got a little worried,” he said, nervous. 
“I’m still here.” 
He fell quiet for a beat, speaking nervously. “Just let me know if I’m boring you, yeah?” 
“I could listen to you talk forever,” you admitted. “I’m having fun learning more about you.” 
Sunghoon’s light laughter made you bite back a giggle. “You make me feel good about myself,” he said quietly before continuing, giving you no time to respond. “But, yeah, I used to play hockey because I didn’t know how to talk to anyone except my parents and my one-year-old little sister, but my only friend on the hockey team invited me to go and watch him at the showcase one year and it was just.. the greatest thing I’d ever seen.” 
You encouraged Sunghoon to go on, still reeling from his quiet confession, and loving the grin in his voice while he spoke about skating and the way he laughed through some stories from work. Like how on a quiet day at the pool when he’d been messing around with Heeseung, Jake, and Riki in the water, some random guy approached them. 
“And this is so crazy too because we were just, like, fucking around, and the guy goes, “My grandmother can swim faster than you,” like he yelled it and stomped away.” 
Worried about waking your sleeping parents, you covered your mouth while laughing, mainly from the offence you can hear in Sunghoon’s voice over something that happened in October. “What did you guys do after that?” 
“I was on shift so I clocked out and went home.” 
The back of the program has a picture of Sunghoon and some of the other skating coaches, but it’s hard to pay attention to them or the signup sheet at the bottom when you see the wide smile on his face; you love the photo, it’s your favourite. He looks so happy, so radiant. If the scrunch of his nose and eyes is anything to go by, he must have been laughing when the picture was taken. This detail only makes you love it even more. 
In the corner of your eye, Jake leans against a wall, scrolling through his phone with a sheet of paper tucked under his arm. Seeing as he’s now (technically) your friend-in-law, you decide to approach him. Through the crowd of attendees waiting to be seated, he spots you as well, rushing over with the widest smile you’ve ever seen on anyone. You could count his teeth. 
Jake takes you by surprise, hugging you. “Hey! Hoon’s so happy that you’re here,” he says, somehow smiling even wider. “I’m so happy that you’re here, I finally have company!” 
When the double doors to the rink open up, you follow Jake to what he describes as the best seats in the house. “I always sit up here, so our boy knows to look over,” he says with a smile, his eyes never leaving you. “In case you were worried about that. It’s kinda far, and there’s lights, so you might have to wave a little harder than normal but, he’ll see you.” 
You nod, smiling too. “Got it.” Jake doesn’t look away. “Are you okay?” you ask him. More out of concern for your own well-being than anything else; you’ve heard of people murdering their best friend’s crushes before. 
He chews on his lip, tilting his head. All traces of his welcoming smile have faded, replaced with a more solemn expression as he looks over your shoulder for a beat. “Sunghoon’s my best friend,” he starts, and it’s hard not to picture yourself tumbling to your death down the slowly populating rows in front of you. They seem steeper now than before. “And he’s.. well.. you know him. It’s just that, he really likes you, you know? And I’m not saying this to be rude but I know about Yeonjun.. and—” Jake stops short, shooting you an apologetic look. “Anyway, I know that for some people, for you, for me, even, seeing more than one person at a time isn’t a big deal, but Hoon’s not like that.” 
You wait for him to continue. He doesn’t. 
A voice booms through the tannoy, telling everyone to take their seats as the show will be starting soon. 
Unsure what to say, you look out at the ice while Jake’s words sink in. It might have been easier to come up with something if he’d been any less kind about it. Spoken to you in a harsher tone. You hate the idea of Sunghoon knowing about the others, even if they were before him. Hate the idea of Jake having a similar conversation with him; telling Sunghoon that he’s not trying to be rude but..
“Sunghoon’s..” you pause, nervous. “He’s the best, and I can’t imagine seeing anyone else,” you admit. 
Jake beams, trusting you, and nods his head. “He’s gonna love your banner,” he grins. “And that.. angry looking plushy you brought.” 
The lights cut and all of the chatter hushes in an instant. Slowly, they fade back on, as a classical piece begins. Jake bounces his leg so hard you can feel the bench rattle under you, he’s practically glowing with giddiness. He’s like a little puppy, a golden retriever with light hair to match. 
After a short while, a boy skates out onto the ice, tall, graceful, an—Riki? He reaches the middle of the rink and introduces himself, enthusiastically reading a script from a few cue cards and looking right up into the stands to wear you and Jake sit. Beside you, Jake cheers, raising his banner, and you crane your neck to read it (LUCKY STRAWBERRIKI), and on the ice, Riki hides his face with his hand, quickly looking at his feet before continuing with his intro. 
You count eight tiny kids skating towards Riki, followed by Jungwon, and a line of other older skaters, Sunghoon is the last to appear, and your stomach churns with pride. All of them are dressed casually; you like Sunghoon’s straight-cut jeans and open button-up. 
As Jake predicted, Sunghoon (and Jungwon, and Riki) look up in your general direction, and next to you, Jake struggles to hold all three posters up at once so you help him, yelling along excitedly. It’s hard to tell from so far away but it feels like Sunghoon is staring straight at you like you’re the only two people at the rink. You feel like standing, like standing and singing HOOOOOOOOOOOON at the top of your lungs. For a moment you wonder if he’d shout back, telling you that right now he can hardly breathe. As if reading your mind, his mouth tugs up at the corners, slightly, before spreading into an ear-to-ear grin that makes your cheeks burn. 
The entire show passes by in an adorable whirlwind, as you and Jake applaud and encourage all of the performers, gushing with one another over how cute the baby skaters (including Jungwon and Riki) are. It’s beautiful and exciting, and you’re so happy you came. 
But time seems to stop when Sunghoon returns. Jake cheers loudly for him when he skates out; you can’t bring yourself to do the same. 
He comes to a stop in the middle of the rink, looking right up at the two of you. Jake waves his poster and raises yours too, seeming to notice the way you’re stuck to the spot. Sunghoon smiles, and somehow, he’s even more beautiful than you remembered. 
Graceful, elegant, Sunghoon glides on the ice when the music starts, immediately skating into a jump — you watch with held breath. He spins once, his arms tucked neatly by his sides, his hair fanning out around his head. Another spin, beautiful, clean. In the seats around you, people are cheering, you can hear them clear as day but the only person you see is Sunghoon who’s turning into his third rotation; the last. He sticks the landing, and an eternity has passed by as you let a sigh of relief slip out. 
Each jump is more gorgeous than the last, though seems to go on forever — you’re nervous as if it’s you on the ice. 
Chewing on the inside of your cheek, you watch as he skates beautifully, executing smooth spins and controlled turns. You don’t think you could look away from him if you tried — this must be what people mean when they say someone was born for something. Even in the casual setting, he looks like a professional, just as stable and fluid as he was in the videos you’d watched. 
The music fades out, his performance is done, and you find yourself thankful for the fact that no one’s sitting behind you as you stand up. Jake does the same. Both of you hold your banners up for him to see, cheering louder than anyone else. Sunghoon raises a hand to wave at you. You wave back excitedly, getting a little flustered by the girl sitting a few rows ahead of you who turns around, smiling dreamily at Jake and rolling her eyes at you.
After bowing politely, Sunghoon looks back up at you, and you can’t help but blow him a kiss, only feeling silly about it when Jake nudges you with a goofy smile. You watch as Sunghoon raises his right hand for a beat, shifting a little on his skates before reaching out ahead of him, catching the flying kiss. 
Butterflies run rampant in your stomach when he holds his hand, and your kiss, over his heart.
As the show ends, you chat with Jake for a bit, gushing over the performances together as the audience clears out, and you trudge slowly down the stairs and back into the lobby. It’s nice chatting with him, seeing the way his face lights up as he talks so excitedly and passionately about his friends. 
You understand why Sunghoon likes him so much.
Sunghoon shows up at the other end of the lobby space, a vision in purple-tinted hair. You have to tell yourself to keep your feet planted on the spot for fear of literally running into his arms. He doesn’t seem to share the same sentiment, thank God, jogging through the lobby, dipping and dodging people as best and as fast as he can to reach you. 
He hugs you. Holds you tight. “I’m so glad you’re here,” he says, quietly, only for you. 
In your chest, your heart seems to grow tiny fists that throw a million punches a minute. Your brain scrambles for the words to say but you can’t come up with anything, hoping that the tightness of your arms around him lets him know that you’re glad to be here. 
He lets go of you, beaming, and moves to dap up Jake, asking his friend if he’s aware that he’s taking Jungwon and Riki go-karting tonight. 
“I’m doing what?” 
“Yeah, they wanted me to take them but I’m busy.” 
“Busy doing what?” Jake asks conspiratorially, arching a brow. He glances sideways at you, and can’t hold back his laughter. 
Sunghoon sets his jaw, punching Jake in the stomach. “Grow up,” he mutters, stifling a laugh of his own. 
You laugh too, partially at what Jake said, mostly at the way he keels over, clutching his stomach, a long groan passing from his lips. Sunghoon’s brows raise when you hand him the banner. “Look what I made for you.” 
“I saw you holding it earlier, baby, I love it,” he says, beaming at you as he reads over it again. “You did such a good job. Can I take it home?” His eyes sparkle when he looks up at you. Your heart cinches in your chest. 
“Of course.”
Next to you, Jake holds out the banner he made. “Do you wanna take mine home?” 
Sunghoon doesn’t even spare him a glance. “Recycle it,” he says. 
Jake tilts his head, confused. A loud huh comes out as he raises his brows. “I make a banner for you every single year and every single time you turn your nose up at it. But here comes a pretty girl and all of a sudden you love banners. Really, Sunghoon? You love it?” He pauses to let out a laugh, incredulous, seeming not to care about the few people that have turned over in your direction. “I can’t stand you.” Jake’s voice is whiny and hard to take seriously.
“I don’t love banners, I love this banner,” Sunghoon corrects, using his hand to shove Jake’s shoulder before holding the banner up over his chest. 
Amused, you watch the two boys bicker for a bit before Jake cuts Sunghoon off mid-sentence, raising his hands, muttering the word whatever.
Sunghoon seems sceptical of Badtz-Maru when you hand him over. He holds the plushy in his hand, eyeing it suspiciously before wrapping his arm around your shoulders. “He’s cute, baby, really, but why’d you pick the world’s unhappiest penguin?”
“He reminded me of you.” Sunghoon’s jaw drops, brows knitting together as he tilts his head, all while Jake struggles to stifle a laugh. “Because he’s from Gorgeoustown,” you add, your heart singing when Sunghoon kisses the top of your head, and you can’t resist letting your arms wrap around his waist. 
Compliments flow out of you like water from a fountain when Jungwon and Riki join your little group outside. Jungwon, with deep dimples and flushed cheeks, shyly mumbles variations of thank you, and I appreciate that while shifting from one foot to the other. Riki glows with pride, standing up straighter, and asking you what else you liked about his performance. 
The sun feels nice on your arms as you watch the two play a very intense, high-stakes game of rock, paper, scissors for the front seat of Jake’s car. They’re playing best of five and getting ready to begin the third, and possibly final round. Riki has two wins under his belt, it’s not looking good for Jungwon whose breathing has become heavy. He’s taken off his hoodie and is stretching his arms in preparation. 
You start a countdown from three and laugh so hard your stomach starts to hurt when Jungwon throws a losing rock against Riki’s paper, the oldest boy falling to his knees on the pavement and holding his head in his hands. Riki jumps higher than he had on the ice, embracing Jake in a tight hug, overjoyed by the victory while Jungwon groans. 
“Let’s hang out,” Sunghoon says as you walk to his car. 
Squeezing his hand, you nod and try not to melt on the concrete when he opens the car door for you. “What do you normally do after skating?” 
Sunghoon seems to think about your question for a while, tilting his head to the side as a fond smile pulls at the corners of his lips. “My parents would always take me out for dessert after competitions, or the next day if it was too late.” 
“Well, what do you think, Hoon? Is it too late for dessert?” 
Giddy in a way you’ve never seen him, he shakes his head in response. And in his car, he hums along to the radio, gingerly resting his hand on your bare knee. 
Sunghoon takes you to a dessert spot by Chaewon’s house, a fairly popular family-owned establishment that serves her favourite cheesecake. You sink into your seat over the table from him, in a slightly stiff booth with a tall back that makes it seem like it’s just you two and a coffee shop chatter Youtube video playing on a loop. 
“What are you having, baby?” he asks, drumming his fingers against the laminated menu. 
Knowing that Chaewon is coming over later, you let your eyes fall to the ice cream selection, reading the names of all 27 flavours and still settling on the only flavour you ever order here. “Cookie dough,” you say, reaching across the table to point at it on his menu. 
“And?” 
“And nothing.” 
His brows furrow. “You’re only getting ice cream?” 
“I mean, it’ll probably come in a cup, with a spoon,” you say, liking the way Sunghoon laughs at your stupid comment. “Chaewon’s staying over tonight so I don’t wanna fill up too much before dinner. I’ll order some cheesecake to take away when we’re done though, it’s her favourite,” you explain. 
He nods his head. “We can share my tiramisu.” 
It’s only after a conversation with Jake later on that you realise how big of a deal this is.
The two of you only manage to stop chatting and laughing when a girl with a cute bow in her hair and a smile on her face comes to ask if you’re ready to order. Across from you, Sunghoon orders a slice of tiramisu and a 3-scoop cup of coffee-flavoured ice cream. He runs a big hand through his hair and clears his throat, cheeks covered in pink as he asks if it would be okay for us to get a milkshake, to share, so, like, one milkshake, but then with two straws? Her eyes flick between the two of you and she grins, nodding her head but Sunghoon doesn’t go on. 
“A strawberry milkshake, please,” you say, watching the waitress take note of it before saying she’ll be right back. 
More than anyone you’ve ever met, Sunghoon loves tiramisu; he adores it. He lets you take the first spoon, and it’s delicious so you don’t have to fake your reaction when you try it. Sunghoon lights up with childlike excitement as he tries the second spoonful, his eyes widening as he hums around the dessert, shaking his head a little out of genuine enjoyment. 
Surprisingly, he’s able to tell you about the origins of the word (stems from the Italian tira mi su or pick me up), and shares a fond memory of the first time he tried it — he was 9 years old and choked on the cocoa powder on top.  
Sunghoon takes the first sip from the tall glass that sits between you both, you gulp at the sight of his lips wrapping around the straw and need to try it too. Your noses bump a little when you lean in, and, with sweet strawberry coating your tongue, you can’t help but giggle.
As you’d been expecting, your cookie dough ice cream is delicious and after a while, you use your tiny plastic spoon to scrape the sides of your cup and ignore the way Sunghoon laughs at you. Even when he’s mocking you, he still makes your stomach flutter.
“I can get you more if you want,” he offers with a wide smile. 
You shake your head. Sunghoon frowns, watching you collect the last pitiful scrapings before eating them. “You were so pretty today,” you tell him around the spoon.
“Did you think I was ugly before?” 
“Extremely.” His face scrunches up with laughter, showing off his dimple and his fangs. “You must have practised forever,” you add, distracted.
Sunghoon shrugs, reaching his hand across the table to play with your fingers. “In a way I did but not really,” he says vaguely, using his nail to draw a circle in the palm of your hand. “I don’t plan anything for the showcase, it’s just meant for fun, you know? I just go out and do what feels right on the day — so, I guess I’ve been practising for the last 13 years.” 
Completely awestruck, you utter a quiet “wow” and giggle when he pinches your hand. 
“What’re you and Chaewon gonna do later?” he asks, changing the subject.
You let him. At the mention of your best friend, a smile teases at your lips and Sunghoon matches it, beaming sweetly at you, looking forward to what you have to say. “I’m gonna cut her hair.” 
“Really?” Your heart thuds at the genuine interest in his tone. “Do you always cut it for her?”
“No,” you pout. “I’ve never cut anyone’s hair.”
“Not even your own?” Sunghoon laughs when you shake your head. “Wow, she must really trust you.”
It’s your turn to shrug. “We’re best friends.”
“She’s lucky.” 
A chuckle slips out of you and you scrunch your nose. “Me too.” 
When he sees the waitress approaching, Sunghoon stacks your dishes to help out, handing them over to her with a soft smile. “Would we be able to get two slices of cheesecake?” he asks. “To go?”
“Sure, what flavour?”
“Vanilla, please.” 
Eunchae, as you read from her nametag, makes a face, pulling air through her teeth. “The vanilla’s gonna be about an hour wait.” 
Sunghoon pales, looking at you. “That’s alright,” you say, smiling. 
“Is there anything else I can get for you?”
Sunghoon shakes his head, asking only for the bill. The two of you go back and forth on it and you practically beg him to let you pay. You put up a good fight, only backing down because he renders you speechless, shaking his head and saying: I’m not gonna take my girl on a date then make her pay. 
His girl hides her face with her hands, flustered. 
He laughs. 
A beat passes before he stands up, holding a hand out and asking you to go with him to the photo booth. With a smile, you slip your hand into his, allowing him to tug you towards it. Behind the curtain, he wraps his arm around your waist, leaning forward to pay. The two of you agree that you’ll take a set for him to keep and one for you. On the screen, a countdown starts from 4, and you almost feel under pressure. 
Posing for the first picture is a little awkward; you watch as Sunghoon puffs out his cheeks, poking one, and suppress your smile to copy. The second isn’t much better; you both grin and hold up peace signs. As you pose for the third, you can feel Sunghoon’s eyes burning holes in the side of your face, can see him on the screen, staring as you look at yourself ahead but can’t bring yourself to look at him. 
The countdown reaches 2 and he holds you closer. His lips touch your cheek when the screen says 1 and you grin when the picture is taken. Sunghoon’s gaze is soft when you look at him. His hand touches your cheek, heavy on your skin, as he leans in to kiss you. You’ve never been kissed in a photo booth before and your heart beats in the back of your throat when the screen flashes, taking the last photo. 
He sticks his head out of the curtain to collect the 4-cut and cringes a little. “God, we look so stiff in the first two,” he complains. 
“I love them,” you say, taking the photo set from his hand. “They’re perfect.” You mean it. The visible awkwardness that you can feel through the frame is endearing to you, and you like the gradual transition into comfort as the photos progress. 
He looks at you with disbelieving eyes and pays for the next set. 
When you reach your table again, Sunghoon slides into the booth next to you, letting his arm rest over your shoulders, and he’s just as sweet as the tiramisu you tasted on his lips. 
With full bellies and two slices of cheesecake packaged in a pretty yellow box, you head back to his car, where he clips his photo set to the sun visor. You can’t help but lean over the centre console to kiss him again. When you pull away from him, you swear his eyes dart to the backseat, but the moment goes by as quickly as it happens so you must have been imagining things. He drives you home with the radio playing lowly, and his fingers locked with yours. 
On your doorstep, Sunghoon kisses you goodbye, biting at your bottom lip and grabbing your ass. He’s never kissed you like this before. You don’t think you were making things up earlier. “I really like your dress,” he tells you quietly, his lips brushing yours. 
Suddenly nervous, you mumble a thank you. 
“I like everything you wear, but this dress?” Sunghoon pulls away from you, just enough to rake his eyes down your body before holding you close. “You’re beautiful,” he whispers, holding your cheek in his palm before kissing you again.  
A few hours later, Chaewon stands on a towel in the bathroom, between you and the mirror while your right hand shakes over a pair of scissors. “Are you sure about this?”
She nods her head. “It doesn’t need to be neat, it just needs to be short,” she assures you, smiling at your reflection in the mirror. Despite only just passing her shoulders, Chaewon’s hair is the longest you think you’ve ever seen it. “I wanted to grow it out, like Kazuha’s, but I hate the way it feels on my skin.” Freshly washed, her hair is just beyond damp and darkening her pink t-shirt. 
You gulp, nervous. “How about you sit down?” 
She nods, saying it’s a good call. 
Chaewon sits on a towel in your bedroom, between you and your full-length mirror while your right hand shakes over a pair of scissors. Before you grab them, you move her hair over her shoulders just so she can tell you once more to give her a chin-length bob. 
She does. You nod. 
Releasing a deep breath you make the first cut, and the sound of the blades slicing through her hair leaves goosebumps forming on your arms. Wet and slightly clumped together, the remaining hair falls from your hold and smacks her ear. You hold your breath as she runs her fingers through it. 
“It’s even!” 
“I only cut one part, Wonie.”
“Yeah, but you did good!” Her eyes meet yours in the mirror and she grins. “Keep going, keep going!” 
The other three sections generate similar reactions, and you keep having to tell her to sit still while you try to trim her hair. 
Chaewon claps her hands when you finish, running her fingers through her “new” bob. “I love it!” she squeals, beaming at your reflection. “It’s perfect.” She turns around on the spot to fling her arms at you, appreciative, wrapping you up in her familiar, soft scent. 
The two of you sit on the couch, as Gossip Girl plays on the TV. For the duration of an entire episode, Chaewon turns her head gently from left to right, her short hair fanning out around her, with a light smile on her face as she does so. You only manage to look away from her when you remember the cheesecake, getting up from your seat abruptly, and excusing yourself. 
As you enter the kitchen, you check your phone, grinning at the sight of a few texts from Sunghoon. You open the fridge as you unlock your phone, clicking on the notification as you take the box of dessert out. Giggles fall out of you at the first message: a cute bed selfie, with his plushy tucked under his arm. 
sh: no way
sh: he smells like you :o
sh: are we seeing each other tmrw? 
sh: (say yes) 
It doesn’t make sense to you that Sunghoon is as cute as he is — you have to put the cheesecake down to relax. 
you: noooooooooo ur so cute
you: i gave him some perfume :o and i’m w wonie tn and tmrw but another time
you: talk later hoonie! 
The sight of the box in your hand makes Chaewon spring out of her seat, covering her mouth with her hands as she does a cute happy dance, prompting you to set the cake down on the coffee table to join her. Tired out, you slump back onto the couch after a while, smiling when she hands over your plate before sitting next to you. 
With a fond smile, you pull your knees to your chest, watching as Chaewon says: You know you love me, xoxo, Gossip Girl, in perfect sync with Kristen Bell. She grins to herself before taking a forkful of cheesecake to her mouth, moaning around the utensil. 
You’ve never known anyone to like dessert as much as her, and a grin forms on its own as you remember the way Sunghoon had done almost the same thing with tiramisu only hours earlier. Being an avid hater of tiramisu, you wonder how Chaewon might react if you told her, before focusing on your slice and the gorgeous face of Leighton Meester. 
The two of you must sit through four episodes, before you sleepily lean into her, telling her she can finish off your piece of cake that she’s been eyeing hungrily since she finished hers approximately 15 Gossip Girl blasts ago. She watches you from the counter while you wash the dishes, thanking you again for the cake. 
Later that night — when she thinks you’re asleep — Chaewon presses a soft kiss to your cheek. “I’ve never had a friend like you before,” she whispers, turning over in bed and grabbing your hand. You don’t know what to do when you hear her sniffling next to you. 
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Salt air and sun cream skate around you — the only things you can smell over the oil soaked chips you share with Chaewon at the beach. Heavy trainers weigh down each corner of the fitted bed sheet underneath you and Chaewon as you watch the wind push clouds through the too-blue sky. Drunk on cider, she laughs to herself, pointing above you. “That one kinda looks like Sunghoon’s friend, right?”
“Which one?” you ask, moving your head to see exactly what she’s pointing at. You’re not sure if you’re asking which friend or which cloud. 
“That one, like Jay.”
Laughter hits you immediately. She’s absolutely right. A triangular mass in the sky leaves you both cackling and rolling around. 
Same as the sand through your fingers, three weeks slip by. You and Sunghoon take more pictures in photo booths and struggle to stop kissing each other. He clasps your necklaces, and puts sunscreen on your back; you hug him from behind and take naps in the park with your head on his chest. Sunghoon makes daisy chains to sit in your hair, and puffy paper stars to fill a jar in your desk. You take his little sister for ice cream and braid her hair when she asks you. 
Tonight however, completely spent from a day of shopping with your mum and Chaewon, the three of you sat on the couch, all eating your bodyweight in cheesecake and crying over the ending of How To Lose a Guy in 10 Days.  
After you’ve all recovered, your mum watches from the car as you hug Chaewon on her doorstep and you fall asleep in the passenger seat on the ride home. No longer small enough to be carried up to your room, you drag your feet to the bed where you fall asleep as soon as your body hits the mattress. But a phone call from Kazuha disrupts your slumber. 
“Are you going to the pool tomorrow?” she asks, sounding alarmingly awake for 4:57 a.m. 
“Tomorrow, today, or tomorrow, tomorrow?” 
“Like,” she pauses, you can picture her running a hand through her hair as she thinks. “In a few hours, I guess.” 
You hum down the phone. 
“We can go together!” The smile in her voice is audible. “Oh, Jay likes YJ. Did I tell you? And fuck, Lee Heeseung is so annoying.” 
“No, he’s not,” you say defensively, slightly rattled by the fact that she woke you up in the middle of the night to shit on your boy’s best friend.
Kazuha scoffs. “Sure.” The line falls quiet for a beat. “He’s not actually annoying, I was just trying to announce that I have a crush on him.” Of course she was. 
“Heeseung seems like a great guy and I’m really happy for you, but let’s talk at the pool, okay?” 
“Talk at the pool!” she chirps, cutting the phone. 
You don’t manage to get back to sleep. 
At the pool, Kazuha says you’re beautiful when you pull your t-shirt over your head and cuts you off before you get to thank her, going on a tangent about how badly she wants to nap but doesn’t want to tan unevenly. Or sleep for too long that her face gets puffy. You take your mission seriously, using your phone to set timers and waking her up each time it goes off despite the way she grumbles at you. 
Riki runs over to tell you to watch him before running away and flipping into the water. Your praise doesn’t seem to get old, but the flips don’t either, each one just as clean and impressive as the ones before. 
Kazuha’s on her 4th rotation when you find yourself wandering over to the concession stand, in the mood for something sweet after being tempted by the scent of baking dough wafting over the pool. But as you get further and further ahead in line, you eventually decide you only want a lollipop, and there are only two people in front of you when you realise you left your phone in your chair and won’t be able to pay.
As if sent from heaven, someone taps you on the shoulder, but you’re met with no one when you look to your left; Sunghoon’s laugh is adorable on the other side of you, contagious when he bumps your hip with his. 
“Hi, baby,” you say, looking up at him. He has a white towel on his head, covering his forehead and tucked behind his ears. “Is there a reason you have this on?” you ask him, touching the damp fabric that sits on his shoulders.  
“What, I’m not allowed to dry my hair?” 
“I’m not allowed to be curious?” 
Sunghoon gently flicks your forehead and you pretend it hurts. 
Like Hannah Montana, he hooks his fingers under the front of the towel, pulling the “wig” off to reveal his luscious (and soaking wet) locks of dark hair. A gasp falls from your lips as your hand flies up to cover your mouth. Having essentially grown up with Sunghoon, or rather, grown up adjacent to Sunghoon, him having black hair isn’t anything new. But it’s definitely something you’re fond of. Fond of him and the way his dark hair only brings out his features, matching his thick brows and the hard lines of his face. 
“Do you like it?” he asks. 
You love it. “What are you gonna do if I don’t?” you ask, pushing some of his hair from his forehead. 
“Buzzcut.” 
With a worried look on his face, he lets you use both hands to cover his hair and imagine it. “Are you laughing because I’m so devastatingly gorgeous with black hair or because I’m about to buzz my head?” Laughter bubbles in your chest, as his hair flops back over his forehead. “Wait, baby, no.” A deep pout settles on his lips. “You actually don’t like it?” 
“I love it, you know I love it.” 
Sunghoon lets you compliment him until you reach the front of the line when he talks with the person on shift. He uses his phone to pay for what you want, and seeing your smiling face on his lock screen makes your cheeks burn while you hide your face in his back, arms locked limply around his waist. 
The two of you only leave the stand when the line behind you builds up, standing in the shade next to it. He watches you unwrap the candy and raises a brow when you hold it out to him. “First lick?”
He shakes his head. 
“Come on, Hoonie,” you tease, letting your hand rest on his arm, liking the way it tenses under your touch. “I know you want a taste.” 
His eyes drop to your chest for a split second, his tongue darting out to wet his lips as he lifts his gaze. “You have no idea,” he mumbles before opening his mouth a little, leaning down towards you. His lips are slightly parted and very tempting as they wrap around the lollipop. 
“Good?”
Sunghoon’s eyes lock with yours as he sucks on the candy. “Very,” he says, the word coming out kind of garbled around it before letting you take it back. You watch him chew on his lip, humming to himself at the lingering taste of your lolly. 
The cola flavour hits your tongue immediately and you like the way Sunghoon gulps as he watches you, struggling to maintain the eye contact you’d had a moment earlier. You don’t take nearly as long as he did, pulling the lolly from your lips with a satisfying pop before smiling up at him, sickly sweet. “Very good indeed,” you echo him, letting the candy rest between your lips before you turn to walk away. Sunghoon follows, thankfully. Heading back over to where you’d been sitting, you find Kazuha’s chair empty. 
A shriek over your shoulder locates her like a pin on a map. 
In the pool, you see her sitting on Heeseung’s shoulders cackling as she pushes Sunoo over so hard that Jay, whose shoulders he’s sitting on, falls too. Gleefully, she leans back, falling into the water only to resurface and find her way into Heeseung’s arms. You stop walking when she tilts her head up to kiss him. Oh? Sunghoon walks right into your back. The kiss is short, not much more than a peck really, she pulls away with a grin on her face, swimming to the edge of the pool and Heeseung’s ears turn red as he watches her. 
Against your own, Sunghoon’s skin is warm, slick almost from what you think is a combination of pool water, sweat, and sunscreen. You hate yourself for liking it. His hardening dick presses against you, and your heart swells — some frenzied mix of feeling flattered, and horniness, you assume. A flame burns in your stomach, hot, blue. Neither of you moves for a while, long enough for Kazuha to walk over to your seats and scrunch her hair with a t-shirt. 
Sunghoon exhales shakily when you lean into him, resting the back of your head on his chest and holding the lollipop by the stick. “You okay?” you ask, voice nothing more than a whisper. 
His head dips, breath fanning your neck as he kisses your shoulder. “I’m sorry,” he mumbles against your skin before standing up straight. He wraps his arms around your shoulders, holding you close. “Do you wanna come over tomorrow?” he asks, words coming out as one. “My family’s on vacation.” His cock twitches against you when he says it. 
“They are?” 
“Mm, they leave tomorrow morning.”
A breathy laugh comes from your nose as you step away from his body, turning around to look at him. Not so subtly, he takes the towel from his shoulder and holds it in his hand, covering himself. A proper laugh falls from your lips, your head tipping back a bit. 
“What if I wanna come today?” you ask, raising a brow. “Tonight even?” 
“Tonight? I can call you if you wanna come tonight.” 
You have a feeling that the two of you are talking about entirely different things.
“Pick me up?” 
“Always.” 
Sunghoon’s bedroom is exceptionally neat. Everything on his desk (his PC set up and a notebook) is placed precisely, and there’s nothing on the floor except for his furniture and a giant 8-ball rug. His off-white walls are completely bare, save for three posters above his desk; your favourite is a handmade (you think) white poster that reads There’s No Planet B in slightly messy block capitals, which sits between blown up pictures of Childish Gambino, and SZA. Underneath the perfectly aligned posters, stuck right above his monitor are the words: Figure skating prince, Park Sunghoon! You’re the best! with a bright red lipstick kiss in the corner; your heart does a triple axel at the sight. 
He stands in the middle of his open doorway like he has been for the past two minutes, watching you admire the medals that sit in a display case on a floating shelf. In 2015 he took home a gold medal from the Lombardia Trophy, and another from the Asian Open Trophy. The two silver medals beside them tell you that he continued to do well at the Asian Open Trophy in the two years that followed.
Along with the Sunghoon you saw today, tiny Sunghoon skates through your mind, so impressive and so young. The quiet boy who often missed class. Who’d fall asleep with his face in a textbook during the classes he did attend. Who you’d let borrow your notes after days of absence, and who wordlessly thanked you with a carton of banana milk each time. How didn’t you know about all of this?  Beyond awestruck by his accomplishments, you look over your shoulder to ask him about it. 
Sunghoon only shrugs. “I was okay.”
“You were okay?” You can’t help but scoff at him. “I’ve seen the videos, Sunghoon. I’ve seen you in person, you’re.. amazing.” The word feels like an understatement. “I don’t know very much about skating but you’re breathtaking.”
“Thank you,” he says, looking at his feet. 
“Have you thought about the Olympics?” you ask seriously. You get ready to apologise when you watch him purse his lips to the side, making you worry you’ve touched a nerve—But Sunghoon speaks before you have the chance. 
“I used to train with the Olympic team but it was too much pressure for me, and I much prefer coaching nowadays, it’s, like, the perfect way for me to feel all the joy of skating and absolutely none of the stress.” The fond smile on his face makes you think he means it.
It almost feels wrong to sit on his neatly made bed but you take a seat on its edge anyway, desperate for one of you to at least look comfortable in this situation. BaMa sits between his pillows and you can’t help but smile at the penguin who stares back at you, unimpressed. Sunghoon stays in place. From where you’re sitting, it’d be difficult to miss the way his eyes widen, stuck on you as he chews on his bottom lip. “Are you okay?” you ask him after a while, starting to feel awkward under his stare. 
For a split second, Sunghoon presses his lips into a straight line that shows his dimple before shrugging. “I’ve never brought a girl to my room before. I don’t know what we’re supposed to do,” he says, fixing his gaze on the wall behind you. 
“The only thing we’re supposed to do is whatever you want. Whatever you’re comfortable with.”
Sunghoon looks at you, thinking. “We should kiss,” he blurts out. 
“That’s what you want?”
“Badly.” But he doesn’t move. 
You wait it out a little, counting thirty whole seconds with no sign of movement from him. “How’re you gonna kiss me from over there?” 
A gorgeous grin takes over his face. Sunghoon closes the door behind him, crossing the room in a few paces to sit beside you. With some hesitation he pats his lap, struggling to meet your eyes while he does so. Your insides feel like a shaken bottle of Coke when you straddle him, and you can hear him exhale shakily at the way your dress hitches up, showing off your bare thighs. Sunghoon’s thighs are firm underneath you, his pants soft against your skin. It’s no use trying not to think about riding his thigh or riding him. But try as you might, your efforts don’t stand a chance against the feeling of him hardening under you.
His lips catch yours in a gentle kiss. You can feel the way he smiles, feel a giggle, light, airy, passing from his mouth into yours. It’s hard not to smile too. His fists clench behind you, bunching up the fabric of your dress in his palms desperately. Hard and thick, his cock presses against your core. You moan and Sunghoon all but freezes, his hands releasing your dress.  
Barely a second passes before he grabs you again, leaning back against the bed without breaking the kiss for anything, until you need to catch your breath and you pull away, sitting back in his lap with your hands resting on his toned stomach. You instinctively grind down on him when his cock twitches under you.
From your seat you can see the way his eyes widen when you do, see his Adam’s apple bob in his throat when he gulps. Or maybe the gulp came first; it’s hard to say. Either way, you don’t think you care. He sighs, relieved when you rock your hips against his for a second time. 
Sunghoon looks like sin the third time you do it, groaning and sitting up on his elbows, looking at you through lidded eyes, sighing through pouty lips. “I’m not ready to have sex yet.” 
You freeze in place. “That’s okay.” 
“I’m sorry.” 
“Don’t apologise, there’s nothing to be sorry for. I’m ready when you are.” 
“I just feel bad that you came all the way over here for nothing.”
Looking down at Sunghoon with all of the uncertainty on his face makes your stomach twist. You wish he knew how much you like being with him; like spending time with him. Wish he knew how nice it was to spend the day sitting by the pool and just getting to look at him. How nice it was to eat fruit in the park with him. To talk about nothing on the phone before bed. You rest a hand on his cheek, melting when his fingers wrap around your wrist and his thumb strokes the back of your hand. “Hoon, I’m not here because I wanna have sex with you, I’m here because I like you.” This thing you’ve felt for weeks, lived with and nurtured seems so foreign now that you’ve put it into words. 
The smile on his sweet face almost has you saying it again, and again, if for no other reason than seeing the way his fangs peek out at you, or how his eyes crinkle up into crescents, or hearing how he laughs, breathy, happy.  Sunghoon moves his head to kiss your palm. “I like you,” he says into your skin, mumbling like it’s a secret. “And I like being with you.”  
Even though Sunghoon saying he likes you feels a bit like a toddler telling you they can’t read, the statement shocks you. You knew he liked you, there wasn’t a shadow of a doubt this entire time, but hearing the words, feeling the shape of them against your palm makes his feelings for you seem tangible; so vivid; so thick. Like moisturiser sinking into your pores. 
He moves his head a little so your hand cups his cheek again. He smiles, soft, shy, Sunghoon. “You do.. eventually want that though, right?” The way his brows knit together when he asks is so cute that you can’t help but laugh a little. “Like, to have sex with me,” he adds. 
“Yes, when you’re ready.” 
“I’m ready to do.. other things,” he says, voice dwindling into a shy whisper. 
Curiosity piqued, you arch a brow. “Yeah?” Sunghoon nods. You press on. “Other things like..” 
A beat passes, and Sunghoon doesn’t speak. 
Instead, he opts to pull you down close to his chest, turning the two of you over. My God. His thin silver chain slips out of his shirt, swinging over your face just a bit, his light hair tickles your skin. You think you’d be happy if you died like this. With his bottom lip pinned between his teeth, his eyes scan your face, locking on your parted lips. His fingernail traces shapes on your hip, you immediately notice how blunt it is now compared to yesterday at the pool and can’t help but smile. Sunghoon moves his hand, his fingertips ghosting over your skin until he reaches the top of your panties. 
“Is this okay?” he asks. 
You nod, smiling, eager. You think you might die like this. 
His finger is long and thick, rubbing devastatingly slow circles on your clit through your underwear. Sunghoon puts a little pressure on it, just enough to please you yet still leave you wanting more. He slips a finger into your hole, pressing a kiss to your lips and catching your gasp in his mouth. 
“What got you so wet, baby?” 
There’s something about hearing these words from Sunghoon that makes them sound new, makes them sound fresh; alluring. Makes you want to cum on the spot when you answer. “You did.” Quickly, you learn that the way his lips quirk up into a smile also makes you want to cum on the spot.
You try to focus on the feeling of his tongue on yours, on the loud, wet sound of your lips smacking together, on anything other than how much better one of his fingers feels than two of yours. How much better he fills you up. How quickly he finds your spot and presses on it. A surge of pleasure licks down your spine, causing you to yelp. Kissing becomes hard fast, but if the way he moves his head to your suck lightly at your neck is anything to go by, he doesn’t mind.
He bites and he nips and he kisses the tender skin to soothe you, all while pushing a second finger into you. Time stops at the stretch and you arch your back towards the ceiling. He passes a breathy laugh; calls you cute. Your thighs press together around his hand. 
Leaning up from your skin, he makes a scissor motion with his fingers to work you open, studying the way your eyes screw shut, liking the way you gasp. His head dips back down beside yours, hair tickling your face. You can feel his lips graze your skin, breath fanning your ear. 
“I can’t stop imagining how you might taste,” Sunghoon whispers. “You gonna let me find out?” 
Your dress is bunched up around your waist, and if it wasn’t for all the material, you might have been able to see the trail of spit and love bites that Sunghoon had left on your stomach. You’ll have no choice but to wear one-pieces and full-length shirts for at least a week. There’s a smile on his face as he looks up at you from between your thighs. 
Sunghoon kisses the dark spot on your panties, holding the wet fabric between his lips, tasting you. A quiet moan slips from him, and your body jolts involuntarily, a chill inching up your spine. His fingers hook on the sides of your underwear and he looks up at you, smiling when you nod your head, pulling them down when you lift your hips. With all that material out of the way, he can finally see your pussy, and the word fuck comes tumbling from his lips before he groans. “So pretty, you’re so pretty, YN.”
He buries his face between your thighs to press light kisses to your clit, pecking it sweetly. Your body buzzes from the contact. “Shit,” you sigh at the feeling of him licking a strip from your dripping hole back up to your clit. 
“My God,” he whispers, licking his lips. He presses his tongue against you, lapping up your wetness and humming appreciatively. Sunghoon’s eyes flutter shut when he holds your swollen clit between his lips, sucking on it, licking at it, slowly, passionately, the way he kisses your mouth. His movements make you jolt and he chuckles against you, a delicious vibration running along your cunt.
Unable to fully express how you feel, you settle with saying so good through a whine. A match strikes a flame in your stomach when Sunghoon moves his head down a little, letting his tongue tease your hole, his nose bumps your clit and he moans into you when you clench around the tip of his tongue. You can’t help but grip his hair to hold him in place, hoping he’ll never stop.
Shamelessly, you hump his pretty face as your orgasm quickly approaches, reminding you how long it’s been since you were last eaten out — not that anyone has ever come close to making you feel this good.  
His lips focus on your clit again as he presses a thick finger into your hole, curling it up towards your belly button a few times before adding another. Immediately, your toes curl up, everything flashes white behind your eyelids while your orgasm rips through you and Sunghoon moans when you finish. You’re thankful for the way he slows down, letting your cum slip out onto his lips and chin for a beat before sucking and licking your slit to clean you up, holding you down as you squirm against his sheets from the sensitivity. 
Looking just as spent as you feel, he leans back on his heels. His eyes are blown wide, his chest heaving, and his lips are swollen, glistening in your arousal that’s spread all over the lower part of his face. Spellbound and unblinking, he stares straight ahead at your cunt. 
“Hoon,” you say, breathless, leaning up on your elbows. 
“Yeah, baby?” He doesn’t look away when he speaks. The trance seems to break at your lack of a response and he seems to want to cuddle just as much as you do if the way he scrambles off the floor and crawls over the bed to you is anything to go by.
Save for Sunghoon’s coaching sessions, the two of you are practically joined at the hip for the entire weekend. In the mornings and before bed, you brush your teeth together and don’t even separate to shower, stuffing yourselves in the cubicle to make out and lather shampoo in each other's hair or soap on each other's backs. 
It’s this excess time together that makes waking up to nothing but a note in Sunghoon’s absence so disturbing. His handwriting stirs something in you, the short and sweet: miss you already, please come visit me at work :) 
None of the girls want to go with you, so you find yourself trying on different swimsuits and figuring out what you’ll do at the pool on your own. With four magazines you’ve already read, a book, and your laptop just in case, you make your way there, enjoying the sun on your skin as you walk. 
“Hi!” A chirpy voice makes you flinch when you reach the pool. Sunoo’s whole face is curved into a grin when you look at him. “I’m Sunoo!” he says, extending a hand for you to shake. His grip is firm, not matching his smile at all. “Do you wanna hang out with us?” 
Equal parts excited and scared to say no, you nod. Dumping your bag in a locker, you meet Sunoo out by the changing rooms’ entrance, and he smiles when he sees you. You follow him over to the smaller pool where the rest of the boys are, Sunghoon included, and introduces you. 
The boys look around at one another, wondering if Sunoo knows that all of them have already met you. He doesn’t pay it any mind, jumping in and joining them. They all continue bothering each other while you sit on the edge, dipping your legs into the water. 
Sunghoon, who’s been grinning at you since you arrived, swims over to you and stands in the space between your legs. Cool droplets hit your thighs when he lifts his arms up to wrap around your waist in an embrace that might leave others wondering how many years it’s been since you last saw each other. After promising Jungwon that you won’t make fun of his armbands, you card your fingers through Sunghoon’s wet hair, giggling to yourself when he presses a kiss to your stomach. 
“Aren’t you supposed to be working?” 
“Well, yes,” he says, looking up at you with a pout on his lips. “I’m just on duty at this pool today. Are you unhappy to be spending time with me?” 
“A little.”
Sunghoon pulls you into the water with him. “Even as a joke I don’t like that you said that.” There’s a crease in his brow that you want to kiss away but he’s already calling the boys over when you have the idea. Before you know it, all seven of them are splashing you with so much vigour that you don’t even bother fighting back. Even Riki who’s taken a liking to you shows no mercy.
As much fun as you had, you can’t help but feel a little drained when Sunghoon takes you home at the end of the day. You end up spending the week with him and his friends, and Riki seems crushed when you politely decline his invitation to poker night on Friday but his spirits lift when you say you’ll treat him to ice cream if he wins. On Saturday afternoon when you get out of the shower, you spend the better part of an hour wrapped in your towel texting Sunghoon, grinning at the messages he sent you while you were catching up on the girls’ group chat. 
sh: riki didn’t win anything last night so don’t let him lie to you, ok baby?
sh: plus im kinda mad at him ngl ..
sh: i wanna see u today
sh: only you
sh: need it :( 
sh: if i find out you’re making plans w riki rn i’ll kill him 
sh: babyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy
sh: i miss you can i take you out 
you: why are you beefing a kid ur 500 
sh: you’re older than me ???
you: yes and ur my baby bubu bear 
sh: .. 
sh: picnic baby
sh: ? 
you: yes when
sh: rn.. 
you: uhm..
you: let me go get ready i miss u so bad
Your picnic quickly turns into an evening nap session for Sunghoon who, full on pizza and cider, lays down on his stomach with closed eyes and his cheek on his forearms. Meanwhile, you slowly sip cider from a sun-warmed bottle and pick off bits of pepperoni to eat, knowing Sunghoon will be annoyed about it later. The setting sun shifts the sky through warm oranges and purples, casting its hues over the park and Sunghoon’s sleeping form. 
“Quit watching me,” he mumbles, blinking his eyes open and yawning as he sits back up. Soft hair is all flat on the side he’d been lying on and his lips rest in a pout that, when combined with his eyes resting in a permanent squint, makes him look confused.
You watch with a grin on your face as he sits back on his hands, crossing his legs. “I have something for you, actually.” 
“For me?” you ask, shocked, your brows raise, and butterflies go crazy in your stomach. The thought of Sunghoon seeing something and thinking of you drives you crazy; you’re in way deeper than you could ever have anticipated. 
You hear the bikes whizzing past you, zipping down the cycle path over to your left, you can see the people walking dogs, pushing strollers, jogging, walking. But it still feels like you’re the only people here. The only two people left in the world, sitting on Sunghoon’s blanket in the middle of this park you’ve come to frequent. 
“For you. Do you see anyone else here?” Sunghoon chuckles, though you can see his nervousness peeking through the joy on his face. “Well, kinda for us I guess, to put it properly. You know what? No, it’s dumb. Forget I spoke.” He covers his face with his hands, embarrassed. 
“Something for us?” Even though it’s not a new development, the thought of you both being an us, in any capacity, still makes you giddy, and the butterflies in your stomach are bordering on feral. “Baby, come on. If it’s from you it’s not dumb. I promise I’ll love it.” You nudge his knee gently.
“You promise?” 
“Promise.” Your pinky finds his, linking together for a little while longer than you’d expected. 
“There’s some stuff I have to say first though, is that okay?” he asks, continuing when you nod. “I know you don’t like talking about it, but we should probably have some kind of conversation about what’s going to happen when you go back to uni, you know?” 
The thought of leaving unsettles you; of leaving him, but you’re desperate not to show it. “Yeah,” you say, aiming for calm but hitting upset instead.
Sunghoon chews on his lip before he speaks again. “And you’re happy, right? Like, with me?” 
You nod. Of course, you want to say but the words get caught in your head, how could I not be?
“Good.” Sunghoon smiles. “Because I like you, so much, and I hate the idea of you going back and telling all your friends about the totally awesome, smokin’ hot, mega babe you hooked up with over the summer.” He continues when you nod. “So I’ve been thinking it might be nice if, when your uni friends ask about your summer, and you feel comfortable talking about me, that you tell them about me as your boyfriend.” The uncertainty in his tone doesn’t match the widening grin on his face while speaking, and the word boyfriend comes out as nothing more than a whisper but you hear it clear as day. 
Head spinning, you meet his eyes, a hopeful glint behind them as he watches you. “Do you mean my totally awesome, smokin’ hot, mega babe boyfriend?” 
“It wouldn’t upset me if you said that.” 
“I’ll keep that in mind.”
“Hold that thought,” he blurts out, opening his backpack. 
Drawing a deep breath, Sunghoon pulls out a pink box with your name written neatly on it before placing it in your lap and asking you to open it. He chews on his lip while he watches. 
WILL YOU BE MY GIRL ? is written on little chocolates that span three rows. The word girl is followed by six empty slots that you can only assume held the word friend. Between the shy look on Sunghoon’s face, and the gesture as a whole your heart leaps jaggedly in your chest. “Will you be my girl?” you read, unable to keep from grinning like a fool.
“I picked them up yesterday before the guys came over, and Riki..” he pauses to sigh, bringing a hand up to scratch the back of his neck. “He ate part of them. I think he shared them with Jungwon actually — not that it matters. Anyway, the store’s closed on Sundays so I wasn’t able to replace them or anything, and I didn’t wanna wait any longer to ask,” Sunghoon says in a partial ramble. 
You look down at the pretty pink box in your hands and giggle to yourself. His friends are cute, you think. “I mean, they could’ve eaten the girl part.”
Sunghoon nods his head, grinning. “At least the sentiment still stands.” He eats a raspberry before looking up at you expectantly. “So, will you be my girl?”
With a smile spread on your face, you nod. “Yes, Hoon, I’ll be your girl,” you say, hoping he knows you’ve always been his girl. 
You cuddle in the grass with your boyfriend until the sun goes down, giddy from cider and the joys of summer romance when he walks you to your door. The two of you stand under the light at the doorstep, grinning competitively at one another. Reluctantly, Sunghoon bids you goodnight with a kiss and — just like after your first date — he stands there beaming brightly long after you’ve gone inside. 
A few nights later the two of you have your first sleepover as a couple and Sunghoon seems to take the idea in stride, showing up at your door with an overnight bag stuffed with his skincare, actual pyjamas, and snacks. Plus a bottle of wine he brought for his first meeting with your parents, despite having already had an awkward meeting with your mum at 3 a.m. in the hallway two weeks ago.
With his face glowing under the lamp on your desk, Sunghoon makes a show of bringing up the time he’d talked at length about his friends and says he thinks it only fair that you talk about yours. Your college friends. A blush coats his cheeks when you tell him he doesn’t need an excuse or justification to ask you things he’s curious about. 
This results in him sitting cross-legged on the bed in front of you, asking you silly things like what kind of Youtube videos you like to watch (his ears burn red when you say Park Sunghoon skating compilations), and more serious — to him — things like what your first impression of him was (he covers his face when you say I thought you were the cutest boy I’d ever seen, and it upset me that you missed so much school). 
“Do you think we would’ve dated if I was in school more?” 
“We are dating.” 
“I mean back then.”
“When we were five?” 
Sunghoon nods. 
“Even if we did date back then, we’d have broken up by lunchtime.” 
His jaw drops. “But it’s us,” he says like it’s the simplest thing ever. It takes a while to console your pouting boyfriend but when he moves on he gets back to asking about your friends. 
“They’re like.. the only reason I don’t completely regret picking my major.” The words come out before you can help them. You rarely talk with Sunghoon, or anyone, about your major, never mentioning much more than what results you got or the classes you’re taking if someone asks. 
So it doesn’t surprise you that he sees this as an opportunity to ask you about it. “Why do you hate it so much?” 
“It just makes me unhappy.” You feel your lips sagging at the corners when you finish speaking. “And the thought of working in that field forever, or, at all, makes me feel physically sick.” 
“What are you gonna do after graduation?” 
A tightness occupies your chest. You think about your brother, on the other end of the country, favouring texts over calls so no one has to hear the sadness in his voice when asked about work. You think about the future, all the unknowns awaiting you once you leave the familiarity of the education system. “I don’t.. I don’t know.” You hate how small your voice sounds when you say it.
You don’t even realise that you’re crying until Sunghoon mumbles hey, no, baby, it’s okay, and cups your cheeks with his hands, using his thumbs to wipe your tears. “I’m sorry,” he mumbles. “I’m on your side, okay? You know that. I’m not trying to upset you, baby, just trying to understand. To help.” Wrapping his arms around you, he pulls you into him, letting you cry into his shirt. “If I’m going about it the wrong way you can tell me, I never want to make you cry.” 
For a while the two of you sit in silence while Sunghoon rubs your back and kisses the top of your head, only speaking when you’ve stopped sniffling. “How about you finish telling me about the girls? Minjeong, Jimin, Aeri, and Yizhuo, right?”
You don’t even remember telling him their names, besides maybe mentioning missing Minjeong. “You remember their names.” It’s not a question, not really. When you pull away from him, looking up, your heart snags in your chest at the sight. Of lovely Sunghoon and his small smile, the Kuromi headband holding his hair back. You want to cry again. 
“I remember everything you tell me.” 
Everything about him is lovely, from his soft cheeks to the Piplup pyjama pants he’s wearing and the way he’s looking at you with literal heart eyes. 
Knowing that Sunghoon has his last competition coming up, you savour every second with him. Barely sleeping that night trying to prepare for the lonely nights to come, memorising the feeling of his arms and the steady beat of his heart against your ear. 
His training schedule is rigorous and he’s had to stop his shifts at the pool to accommodate it, committing his days to skating and his nights to you when he can. Though he’s always so tired by the time he gets to your house that he can only sleepily sit through dinner with your parents and falls asleep almost as soon as his head hits the pillow. 
Like most nights you spend apart, Sunghoon’s face fills your screen, talking about what he did that day that kept him from you. Today’s activity was back-to-back coaching sessions, then going to the movies with the boys, and, now, tired out from pretending to be patient, his eyelids are shut for most of the conversation. He looks so warm and cosy under his duvet that you wish you were there with him, or that he was here with you.
“I can come over if you want me to,” he says, and from the way he sits up, you can tell he means it. 
You hadn’t meant for those thoughts to be verbalised.
Looking to your left, at the space in your bed, you don’t trust yourself to be alone with him. Not here. You do want to see him though. Almost desperately. For the good of you both, you shake your head. “Let’s go for a drive?” 
Sunghoon smiles and your stomach turns. “Give me 25 minutes.” He cuts the phone. 
Sitting in the darkness of his car is way worse than having him in your bed. Having started on your knee, his big hand now rests on your thigh, barely an inch away from where your shorts start. A cold sweat breaks out on your skin. Leaning your head against the window, you let your eyes fall shut while Sunghoon sings SZA quietly. Eventually, the car comes to a stop.
“We’re here.” 
It’s too dark out to see anything properly until Sunghoon opens your door for you. “The park,” you say, looking around at the now familiar street. “Wouldn’t be my first choice for a murder.”  
“If you think about it, it’s sorta perfect. Who would hear you screaming for help at 2 a.m. on a Wednesday?”
Sunghoon pulls his backpack and a fleecy blanket from the backseat, and, with a ridiculous grin, you watch him put the blanket down in the grass, not too far from where he’d parked the car. You leave your sandals to the side and sit down next to him. 
“The store was closed, so we’ll have to deal,” he explains, taking out some fruit and two bottles of water. 
You shake your head. “It’s perfect.” 
Sunghoon lets you feed him strawberries, humming appreciatively around your fingers. You take a few sips of water before shifting on the blanket, turning around in the space between Sunghoon’s open legs and leaning back on his chest. He hums the same SZA song from his car and you can’t help but close your eyes. 
You tip your chin to kiss him, accidentally letting your hand rest on his lap. 
Ever since that day in his room, things between you have found a way to turn sexual after a while. Not that either of you seems to mind. Though you will admit that sometimes it is nice to just sit with Sunghoon and watch the sun come up over the hills by his house. Or to watch Mighty Ducks on your laptop with your head on his shoulder. 
Tonight doesn’t seem like one of those “sometimes”, but you really can’t find it in you to complain or want to change anything when he slips his hand down the front of your shorts. More focused on the way your lips feel on his, Sunghoon lazily runs his finger through your slick for a beat before pushing into you and smiling to himself as you gasp against the kiss. 
You pull away from him, shifting around a little, trying to angle yourself so you can see what you’re doing when you tug his waistband out of the way. The sight of Sunghoon’s cock, of his pretty tip coated in precum that dribbles from his slit down his shaft never gets old. If anything, it only turns you on more and more each time. You stroke him slowly, occasionally letting a finger tease the spot below his head, just the way he likes it.
“Oh, my G—” Sunghoon cuts himself off with a groan, pressing his lips to yours again.
The breeze tickles your arms, keeping you cool despite the way your skin burns under his touch. He’s close to cumming, you can tell in the way his cock twitches in your hold.
“I want you,” he mumbles against your lips. 
“You have me.” Sunghoon lifts his head away from yours after you speak, looking down his nose at you. It seems like he’s searching your face for something as he pushes a third finger into your hole. Something clicks in your head, understanding. “Fuck me,” you say, barely short of begging.
His hips buck up into your still hand. “I don’t have a condom.” 
“You’re joking.” 
“No,” he sighs, shaking his head solemnly. “I wish.” A frown teases at your lips. “Why didn’t you bring one?”
You arch a brow. “Why would I bring a condom when we’re waiting to have sex?” 
“Because I don’t wanna wait anymore.” 
“Ok,” you nod, trying to think as he separates his fingers. “Well, this is.. this is me finding that out, right now.”
Sunghoon’s never put a fourth finger in you before; it’s a tight fit. Your head falls back and you give up your poor attempt at continuing to jerk him off. “I don’t care if you don’t. About condoms.” 
“Oh, you’re on the pill?” 
“I ran out two weeks ago, I thought.. you’d give me—” A moan cuts you off. Sunghoon chuckles. “I thought you’d give me notice or something.” 
“Notice?” he asks, voice high, incredulous. A beat passes. “I don’t care,” he says eventually. “I need you.” 
You nod your head, relieved. Whining a little when Sunghoon pulls his hand out of you, and whining a lot when he sucks on each of his fingers, one at a time. “I’ll get Plan B in the morning,” you say, scrambling to your knees, facing him. 
“We’ll go together.” A soft smile spreads across his lips as he holds you by the waist. “And I’ll ask Jake to pray for us.”
Hungrily, you watch as he pulls his white t-shirt over his head. There’s a flash of something in his eyes. Sunghoon has a firm grip on your shorts, barely a second away from yanking them off when he stops, leaning away. “I’ve never..” he trails off, struggling to hold eye contact. “I’ve had sex just not.. outside,” he whispers, his lips pouting through his words.
Despite your desperation, you can’t help but feel like maybe this shouldn’t be the moment you two have sex for the first time. You almost can’t believe yourself, having Sunghoon here, hot, sweaty, with his kiss-plumped lips, and lidded eyes; his groans, and his sighs; his wandering hands and hard cock pressed against you, yet thinking that maybe you should wait a little longer. 
“We don’t have to do this now.” 
“I do.”
“Okay,” you whisper, relieved, pressing your lips onto his. You shiver in Sunghoon’s hold, cold and chasing his kiss when he pulls away, shuddering at the feeling of his fingertip grazing your collarbone. 
“You’re cold, baby.” 
You shake your head. “I’m not.” As soon as the words leave your mouth, your body betrays you and your teeth chatter. 
Sunghoon frowns at you, playing with some of your hair beside your ear. “You have goosebumps, and your teeth are clattering. I’ll take you home, come on,” he says, letting go of you. 
“I have goosebumps because I’m horny, and I want you to fuck me,” you admit, feeling your need for him in every part of your body. “And I don’t want you to be nice about it either, I’m already your girlfriend.” 
You watch him gulp. Sunghoon’s eyes scan your face. He leans into your touch when you let your palm cup his cheek, his skin is burning hot, if it was any lighter outside you might have been able to see the pink on his face. He wraps his thick fingers around your wrist, letting his thumb stroke the back of your hand, and his pretty eyes find yours. 
“I want to, so bad, but you’re freezing.” He kisses your palm. “How about I take you home and fuck you there, hmm? I won’t be nice, I promise.” 
Oh, God, you think, clenching around nothing. 
Dazed, you almost agree until something clicks. “Take this off,” you say, practically begging as you tug at his knitted hoodie. His brows knit together. “Let me wear it.” Without hesitation, Sunghoon pulls the jumper over his head and slips it over you. “Please, Hoon,” you all but beg, as you put your arms through it. 
The two of you are close enough that you can see his pupils dilating as his eyes trail over your body. “I like my clothes on you.” Is the only thing he says before kissing you again.
Sunghoon’s hands are all over you, eventually settling on the top of your shorts, as he does his best to tug them off. You raise your hips to help him out before settling back into his lap, whining at the feeling of him under you, touching your pussy for the first time. He throbs against you when you grind down on him.
It all seems so real now. He’s so big; so hard, that you start to worry. Suddenly you remember the ache in your jaw every time you suck him off and how much of him is left over, even when his head inches its way down your throat.
Flustered, you start to stall a little, rocking back and forth on his length, coating him in your wetness. You take him in your hand after a while, jerking him a little to spread his precum and your slick all over him. He doesn’t seem to notice that you’re whiling up time, and if he does, then he doesn’t seem to care, simply moaning when you lift yourself off of him to stroke your clit with his tip and tease your slit. 
Sunghoon’s teeth worry his bottom lip as you try to take him, his head falling forward, eyes trained on the spot between your bodies where you connect. His hold on your waist is so firm you can practically feel bruises forming under his fingertips and the sting of his cock pushing into you makes you draw a breath. “Just take your time, yeah?” he mumbles. “No rush.” 
No rush? you think, he must be crazy. You don’t think you can wait any longer, trying hard to sink down on him despite the pain of the stretch. You like it, that sting, the heat, you don’t want to go without it ever again. You must be crazy. Fuck, and Sunghoon are the only things you can bring yourself to say.
“I know, baby. I’m sorry,” he tells you. “It’s okay,” he says, though he doesn’t look like he’s doing any better than you are. 
Sunghoon’s head falls forward once you’ve taken all of him, his teeth sinking into the skin at the base of your neck as he lets out a broken whine. Everything feels a little too much to bear. It’s so hot, when did it get so hot? With the last few crumbs of your brain power, you tell yourself to take the hoodie off, but you feel like you can’t move. 
He fits so well, fills you up just right. 
With a shaky breath, he lifts his head to look up at you. “So beautiful.” Sunghoon pushes some of your hair from your face. “Good girl,” he coos, using his thumb to wipe tears you hadn’t even realised were there. “You’re doing such a good job, baby. Taking me so good.”
Sunghoon asks if you’re okay. It sounds like Sunghoon asks if you’re okay.
Your fist balls around the fabric of his cotton shirt. “Warm,” you whisper. “Too warm.” He loosens his grip around your waist, moving his hands to your hips to pull the hoodie off of you. You lean back a little to let him take it off and feel as if you’re being split open, the angle only pushing him deeper. 
With the hoodie off, the cool summer breeze makes you feel a lot better; makes taking him a lot more manageable. So you move. His pretty face scrunches with pleasure, as a long, heady groan comes from his throat. “You feel so good. So tight.” There’s something in his voice that you don’t recognise, desperation, need. Sweat beads along his hairline, the flush in his cheeks so prominent you can see it despite the dark. 
You want to see him like this all the time. Need to.
His hips buck up towards you, seeming to catch you both off guard if the way you gasp simultaneously is anything to go by. He wraps his arm around your waist, his trembling hand beating against your skin, and lets his other hand rest on the blanket behind him, leaning back on it. 
“You’re so good at this,” you sigh. “How are you so good at this?” You practically clamp your mouth shut, not letting yourself say any more lest you propose to him, or worse, expose your breeding kink.
Sunghoon only gives you a languid smile before kissing you. 
It’s more than a little hard to focus on coordinating the movement of your lips and tongue when he’s fucking you the way he is; lifting you off of him so only his tip stays inside, then thrusting all the way back in, deep and slow, trying to feel every single part of you and doing a good job hitting that spot that has you seeing stars. So the kiss is messy and loud, an exchange of spit and moans but you’re way too turned on to care. 
Before long, he uses his hand to pull down the front of your vest, attaching his wet mouth to your nipple instead and your brain short circuits. He moans into your skin when you clench around him, his body stuttering under you.
“Baby, I don’t..” Sunghoon sighs, lifting his head from your chest to look at you. He’s the picture of desire, of lust, with his messy hair and parted lips, the sweat slipping from his brow bone. “I don’t think I’m gonna last much longer,” he admits, thick brows pulled into a furrow.
At this rate, you don’t think you will either. His words only make you dizzy, they spur you on as desperation sets in; to see him cum, to feel it. Like always, his sounds are just as pretty as the rest of him, his grunts and his groans, and the ragged breaths that catch in his throat. And you quiver in his lap at the feeling of a knot forming in your stomach, immediately unravelling when his finger catches your clit again. 
Your head falls back. “I’m—” Is the only thing you can say.
“I know, baby, don’t hold back. I wanna see you make a mess.” 
His words send you over the edge, forcing your orgasm out of you while Sunghoon moans and fucks you through it. So good, baby, he mumbles over and over, stuttering through the words when you cum, though you barely hear him over the sound of his cock squelching up into you. 
A shaky breath and the word fuck tumbles from his lips. 
Sunghoon’s thighs tense and his stomach does the same. Shuddering under you, he cums hard, filling you up completely. You’ve never had a guy cum inside before, let alone been fucked without a condom, so you weren’t sure what to expect. But nothing could have prepared you for this. 
Heat courses through you everywhere, and you’ve never been so warm in your life. You can feel every last drop of his hot cum spilling into you, can feel it leaking out around him, slicking up your thighs. Shaking in Sunghoon’s lap, you’re full in the best way, eyes rolling back as your mind goes completely blank. 
Both of you try to catch your breath as he holds onto you tightly, his arms hugging around your waist. You’re having a hard time calming down with him still inside, but you don’t think you could move if you tried, and it seems as though he feels the same, only being able to bring his head away from your chest. With heaving shoulders and a dazed look in his eyes, he smiles up at you, sweet, contagious. Drunk on him, a laugh starts to bubble in your throat, forcing its way out. Sunghoon laughs too, and breathy chuckles slip from you both, happy, delighted. 
He reaches for some napkins, cleaning up what he can with you still in his lap before reaching for his hoodie. You watch as he folds it up a couple of times before putting it down near the blanket’s edge, shifting over a bit to hold you in his arms and lay you down, the hoodie under your head like a pillow. 
You think he must be an angel. 
Gently, he separates your legs to clean you up properly before pulling his boxers and shorts back up. You watch as he looks around the space for something, returning to your feet to help you put your underwear and shorts back on, sniffling a little and making his way to lie down on the grass beside you. Sunghoon reaches over your body and uses the remaining blanket behind you to cover you up. 
Sleepily, you rest your head on his chest, feeling his heart race against your cheek. “You’re so big, Hoon,” you whisper, mind still reeling. 
A beat passes. “Ok, baby, thank you,” he says a little awkwardly, you can feel his chest stutter as he chuckles and you can’t help but smile.
The stars above you beam brightly and you don’t think you’ve ever seen so many at once, peeking through the few dark clouds that drag lazily through the sky.
“You did so well tonight, YN,” Sunghoon tells you after a while. “You always do so well.” Your heart beats in your throat as he kisses the top of your head.
“Really?” 
“Mm,” he hums.
Curious, you look up at him. “What did I do well?” 
“Should I fill out a performance review?” 
“I just wanna know what you’re gonna tell your friends later.” Your heart rate picks up when Sunghoon laughs, sweet, contagious. “I’m serious.”
Into the air above, he huffs a long, dramatic sigh. “You really wanna know?”
“Desperately.”
He leans up on his elbow, looking down at you. Butterflies flutter in your stomach, already nervous about what Sunghoon might say. It’s as if he’s the only person in the world, the only one that makes a difference. You can’t help but feel special under his gaze, grateful that you’re the one who gets his attention. His hand is big on the side of your face, his thumb grazes your cheek. 
Sunghoon opens his mouth but closes it before speaking, then brilliant, bright, he smiles. “I think I’m gonna tell them I’m in love with you.” Your breath hitches in your throat. “And, ask Jake to pray for us.” 
And, ask Jake to pray for us, you repeat as if bound by a spell and he nods his head. Overwhelmed, you hide your face in his shirt. “I love you.” 
Back at your place, Sunghoon does a good job of living up to what he’d promised you earlier. Leaving you to wake up that morning in his t-shirt, with your head on his chest and a dull ache between your thighs — though not before, for the first time since primary school, you (and Sunghoon) kneeled by the side of the bed to perform the sign of the cross. He’d stumbled his way through a prayer first and you followed, watching as he sent a text to Jake before eventually drifting off to sleep, tired and sore.
The duvet is bunched at the bottom of the bed, leaving your bare thighs victim to the light breeze rolling through your room. Sunghoon’s mouth is slightly ajar and he snores sweetly. Even in his sleep, his stomach is tight and his soft penis rests cute and limp against his thigh in a way that leaves you stifling a giggle. You want to kiss it. 
Regrettably, you don’t.
“Stop looking at me,” he mumbles, half-heartedly lifting his arm to cover your eyes, though, with his still shut, it ends up resting on your neck.
“I’m not.” 
Sunghoon pries open one of his eyes, catching you. He follows your gaze down his body, groaning when he realises what you’re looking at. “You’re worse than I thought,” he says, sitting up to pull your duvet back over himself, resting over his waist. “I’m never sleeping naked next to you again.” 
You open your mouth to quiz him but he covers your lips with his hand. “Or anyone else, relax.” 
“Good boy,” you mumble, the words muffled against his palm. 
“Ew,” he whispers when you lick his hand, wiping it on your t-shirt before pushing some of your hair away from your face. “How are you feeling, baby?” His voice is soft when he asks, eyes scanning your face for even the slightest sign of discomfort.
“I’m kinda sore, but I’m good.” 
“You are?” There’s pride in his voice when he asks, eyes lighting up for a beat before pressing his lips together, trying to hide a smile. His broad shoulders betray him, trembling with silent laughter. Fuck off, you mumble, just as amused as him. 
Sunghoon clears his throat. “I’m sorry, baby,” he whispers. “I’ll be gentle next time, promise.” 
Next time. The simple words and all of their hopefulness leave your mind reeling. Laying next to Sunghoon, you grin at the thought of all of your next times with him. Through the seasons of the year; through autumn; through winter, spring, and back to summer again. 
“What’s on your mind?” he asks through a yawn. 
You love him. “I love you.” 
You’re expecting him to kiss you when he starts to lean in, but he pulls you tight against his chest instead. He smells faintly like sweat when he hugs you. Like sweat, and sunblock, and peonies. Like kisses during sunset, and late-night swims. Like the happiest you’ve been in a long, long while. 
“I love you, more.”
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© zreamy (2023), all rights reserved. do not repost, translate, or plagiarise my work. do let my know your thoughts !
permanent taglist: @asahicore
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radxianixe · 2 years
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did one-week-ago me really think my ryan seaman obsession was gonna wear off in less than a week it's been going full force for 2 months now and it doesn't feel like it's dying any time soon argdhdjdhdj
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kitten4sannie · 2 months
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ᴇᴠᴇʀʏᴛʜɪɴɢ ᴀᴛ ꜱᴛᴀᴋᴇ
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ᴏᴍᴇɢᴀᴠᴇʀꜱᴇ/ᴏʀɢᴀꜱᴍ ᴅᴇɴɪᴀʟ ➠ ꜱᴇᴏɴɢʜᴡᴀ
pairing: vampire lord! seonghwa x human! reader (fem) feat. a two second cameo from vampire! san
genre: abo, kinda historical (think guilded era vibe but vampires and humans coexisting kinda), smut
summary: you decide to play with your master’s feelings during the annual masquerade ball held between vampires and occasionally their human counterparts.
w.c: 2.5k
warnings: alcohol usage, mentions of blood, general vampirism/hierarchies, dom! seonghwa, bratty! reader fucks around and finds out, dirty talk, ownership kink, exhibitionism/voyeurism, praise/degradation, possessiveness, pet names/name calling, manhandling, blood drinking, groping, rough blowjob, spit mentions, fingering, orgasm denial, facial, cum eating, unprotected sex, breeding kink, creampie, l bombs
a/n: im obsessed with the idea of criminally insane cunty vampires so i sat hunched over like a damn shrimp and typed up a storm tyvm. also !!! this fic is dedicated to my dear friend orion @pluvialorion ilysmmmm ughh i hope you enjoy >< <33
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ᴘʀᴇᴠ | ꜰꜰꜰ ᴍᴀꜱᴛᴇʀʟɪꜱᴛ | ɴᴇxᴛ
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“Those two are always up to something, I swear. It’s so  troublesome,” one old age vampire muttered, complaining about you and your vampire Master to the person standing besides her outside of the ballroom circle. She adjusted her masquerade mask, put off by the sight of you downing a glass full of expensive wine. “Why the council ever decided to allow humans to attend our annual blood balls is beyond me.” 
“They always cause a scene,” the other old age vampire agreed, turning his head to watch as you whimsically made your way across the dance floor in your heavy laced dress, taking the hand of any vampire that wanted to dance with you, while your Master watched from the side with growing annoyance. “It’s unsightly.” 
“Yes, it’s completely inappropriate, the way they act like they’re the main characters inside some overdone fictional novel,” she scoffed, the vampiress getting herself worked up over nothing, her fingers clenching around her own wine glass filled with a blood blend. 
“You hit the nail on the head,” the man nodded, one hand on his hip, the other tilting his wine glass back to drink down its bloody contents, watching you trade one dance partner for another, surprised that you were letting a new age vampire get so handsy with you. “Oh, here we go.” 
Seonghwa reached up to brush at his flowy raven hair in a frustrated manner, his furrowed brows and scrunched-up face not doing much to dispel your current goal in pissing off your Master in hopes that he would chase you across the castle grounds and fuck you into oblivion. “You’re asking for it, little lamb…” he mumbled to himself, the bright red hue in his eyes growing brighter by the second. 
“I didn’t realize you were interested in me, Miss Y/N. Care to forget about your sour, old age counterpart over there and spend the night with me?” the charming, feline-like vampire you were using whispered into your ear, holding your body impossibly close to his as you both slowly rotated together in timed circles according to the flow of the orchestra music that was playing throughout the large ballroom. 
“Oh, Mr. Choi, try not to puff out your chest just yet,” you murmured back with faux pity, clasping your fingers around his cheeks, feeling his fingers inch closer and closer to your ass, able to feel the fiery gaze of your lover from afar. “You’re simply a puppet for my amusement.”
The vampire scoffed, still finding it inside himself to twirl you around and bring you back into his arms, his fingers clasping around your waist a little tighter than before, clearly irritated. “That’s quite rude of you, human. You could’ve lied.” 
“Does it matter? I’m not trying to impress you,” you huffed, eyeing Seonghwa out of the corner of your vision, noticing the way he clutched the edge of the aged mahogany table being used to showcase various blood-filled desserts. Just as the vampire was about to speak up, you shook your head, silencing him. “Just hurry up and grab my ass, will you? And grab it hard. I want Seonghwa to–Oh!”
The peeved vampire did indeed get a handful, his fingers sinking deep into your squishy flesh through your dress, leaning over your shoulder to make eye contact with Seonghwa, who was fuming, still having the gall to stick his tongue out at him. 
An intoxicating mix of anger and arousal coursed through Seonghwa to the point that it all spilled out of him at once, resulting in a short, aggressive shout, the other patrons looking over their own shoulders to see what was going on. Sadly, they weren’t very surprised to watch him lift up the side of the heavy dessert table and toss it across the room with a frightening amount of ease, narrowly missing the heads of the orchestra members. 
You let go of San who quickly scampered away, not wanting to feel the vampire lord’s intense wrath. You, however, took pride in seeing the way your lover was seething, how he pierced you with his dark crimson eyes and delightfully suffocating pheromones alone, his white, elongated fangs already on display for you, knowing he wished he could just sink them directly into the most delicate parts of your body. 
“Why are you so angry, my love?” you called out to him with faux naivety, giving him a pout, motioning to the mess that had spilled onto the sheer marble floor. “You ruined all those lovely desserts.” 
“And almost took the head off of a violin player, but I digress,” the older vampire from before murmured to her friend, the both of them chortling softly to themselves. 
“Oh, you know what you’ve done, darling,” Seonghwa tsked from across the room, taking slow, deliberate steps in your direction, his high-heeled shoes clacking lightly against the pristine floor, most of the other patrons stepping out of his way. “I have a question for you. Do you know what happens to pretty things that disobey their Masters?” 
You brought your hand up to lift off your masquerade mask just in time for Seonghwa to stand directly in front of you, his lean, elegant frame towering over yours. “I’m unaware of the answer, dearest. Do pray tell.” Your face twisted into something that could only be described as smug. Seonghwa wanted to wipe that expression off your face and turn it into something more worthwhile — flushed, contorted with a lovely mix of pain and pleasure, and painted in his cum.
“They get punished, my sweet. So, I suggest you hike up that lovely dress I bought you and get to running.” 
࿏࿏࿏
There was something so exhilarating about having the love of your life chase after you, knocking over furniture and pushing other vampires out of the way just to get his hands on you. You would look back occasionally, catching glimpses of the hazy blood-lust in Seonghwa’s eyes, resulting in a fresh wave of slick between your thighs. 
Somewhere along the line, you had ended up in the castle garden, your bare feet hitting the soft grass, having lost your heels during your chaotic trek there. Panting softly, your breath hitting the cold night air, you realized you were surrounded by chipping marble statues of vampires of the past, a maze of blood-red roses covered in thorns surrounding a sleek stone gazebo, and thousands of constellations sitting in the dark sky above you. 
“Caught you, little lamb…” you heard in a deep, gravelly voice, shivers making their way up your spine. Seonghwa took slow steps near you, finding it amusing how you trapped yourself in a corner, his entire being pulsing with sexually-charged aggression. “But you wanted this, didn’t you? You want me to have my way with you, don’t you, sweetheart?”  
Rather than replying verbally, you simply held up the front of your dress, showing off your plump, slicked-up cunt for his viewing pleasure, your lips twisted up into a perverted smile, lust practically emanating from your form. “What do you think, my love? Does my wet cunt give you any hints?” 
Before you knew it, Seonghwa had you pinned to the side of the gazebo, one hand on your shoulder to keep you still with his immense strength and the other underneath your hiked-up skirt, fucking you deep with two agile fingers, not concerned with the occasional passerby, some of them slowing down to witness the titillating sight of a vampire lord punishing his human counterpart.
“I can feel you squeezing around my fingers, sweet. Is my poor little lamb already falling apart for me?” he asked with faux pity against your neck, sucking your soft flesh into his mouth to leave a mark, piercing them lightly with his fangs. “Is it because anyone can come by and see the way I have my hand up your skirt and hear the pretty little moans that you’re making for your darling?”
“N-ooo, it’s because it’s you, Seonghwa,” you sighed out softly, a familiar heaviness filling your core until your legs went wobbly, moaning from the feeling of Seonghwa gulping down just enough of your life source to make you pleasantly dizzy, his fingers still slipping in and out of your leaking cunt.
“Mm, it’s a pity though. I wish San knew just how quick I can make your pretty cunt leak all these juices onto me,” he purred against your soft skin, slurping your arousal from his fingers before cupping his palm onto your hot cunt, lightly moving it over your clit, knowing he was pleasuring you just enough to make you squirm, but aware that your much-needed orgasm had faded away due to his control.
He brought his still dripping fingers up to your mouth, pleased that you obediently sucked your own slick off of them, his gaze flitting between your lips and love-struck eyes. “He’ll never see you like this. See the way you need me in every possible way I can have you…”
“It’s only for you to see, my love,” you replied lovingly, pressing your lips onto his, drawing Seonghwa into you like a moth to a blazing flame.
You shared a series of frenzied, heated kisses that consisted too much of tongue, teeth, and fangs, your hand slipping into Seonghwa’s loosened satin trousers to swiftly jerk him off, his abundant pre-cum squishing in between your closed fingers, your quick, unrelenting grip causing him to wobble a bit, the thick edges of his heeled shoes sinking further into the grass below. “Feels so good, doesn’t it, Hwa? You’re so hard for me, throbbing, leaking so much…”
“Fuck–I need you, darling, need you bare for me, need your pretty mouth around my cock,”Seonghwa groaned out onto your lips, nipping at it enough to get a small taste of iron on his own crimson stained ones. Without a word, he tore your dress from your body, pearls falling from your broken necklace and landing around your feet. You gasped. He clasped his hands around your corseted waist, bringing your face near your neck, his lips just barely touching your skin. “On your knees, my love.” 
You melted to the floor, reaching up to hold onto his hips, watching his cock spring out once his pants past his v-line, eventually holding it in front of your drooling mouth. You studied him, your eyes traveling up his shiny, curved length to his pronounced pink head, sticking your tongue out to catch a drop of his pre-cum on your tongue. “It’s so pretty, Hwa…”
“I know it is, sweetheart. Now, open up,” he exhaled softly, slipping his slender fingers into your soft hair to clutch the sides of your head, plugging your mouth up with his thick cock. 
Seonghwa fucked your face so quickly, so sloppily, so desperately, he reached his end in a matter of minutes, bringing you down onto his cock until your nose pressed into his pelvis, feeling your throat contracting around him. “Fuck, you drive me mad, darling…I’m already about to cum….”
It was when he was able to smell the endless slick that dripped out of your needy cunt, that Seonghwa pulled out, rubbing his cockhead across your lips and smearing his pre-cum across your face, ruining the perfect state of your makeup. “You look so pretty, my love, but I know how to make you look even more divine for me…”
“Enlighten me, my dear,” you sighed lovingly, licking the warm saltiness from your lips.
“Watch closely. This is all for you, darling…” Seonghwa gazed down at you with his crimson, hooded eyes, his chest rising and lowering with shallow breaths, using his closed hand to milk his flushed cock, seemingly endless splashes of cum landing onto your face. “Mm, what do you think San would think of you now, little lamb? Think of your lovely face painted with my cum?” 
“He’d think I was a mess,” you mused, licking the bitter milkiness from your swollen lips, opening your mouth to take one last spurt of cum onto your tongue when Seonghwa moaned wantonly, his fingers squeezing near the pinkish tip. “He’d know I’m yours.” 
“My mess, my beautiful darling. Of course he’d know you’re mine. All mine,” Seonghwa sighed dreamily, lowering himself to his knees to pull you in for a deep kiss, your tongues and lips meeting with fervent need. 
“You think he’d enjoy watching you fuck me into ecstasy?” you asked in between heavy breaths and kisses, hooking your thighs around his bare waist, slipping your hands onto the bare skin of his chest past his loose blouse, your fingers grazing his nipples. 
“I’d take off his head, before I’d let him watch the way your cunt stretches open for me,” Seonghwa groaned, groping down your body, rubbing two fingers against your slippery folds, his fangs returning to your neck, this time indulging his instincts and slipping inside you, resulting in soft throes of pleasure from the both of you. “Speaking of, your little cunt needs my cock, doesn’t it? Is that why you’re so wet?” 
“Yes, please, I can’t stand being empty any longer, my love,” you whined to him, your squelching cunt already beginning to clench around his thrusting fingers, wishing his cock was filling you up instead. 
“You won’t be able to cum with just my fingers, will you, darling? Because your lovely body is only accustomed to my cock, isn’t it? Made for it, hm?” Seonghwa continued to tease you with his words, curling his digits inside you, resulting in increasingly heavy moans from his one and only, encouraging him to fuck you faster with them. “Fuck, you’re clenching so hard around me, darling. You’re so good for me…”
“Oh–my god, so close…” 
“Yeah? You want to spill your cum all over me, Y/N? Make a mess of me?” Seonghwa encouraged breathily, his forehead pressed to yours, pressing his lips against yours in between moans. 
“Y–esss…” 
Just as you were about to cum, you were suddenly filled with a devastatingly empty feeling, realizing he had pulled his fingers out and brought them to his mouth, sucking your vast amounts of slick off of them. “N-no, please, Seonghwa, I want to cum…!”
“You’ll have to cum on my cock, sweetheart. Now, be good and take it,” he replied softly, his voice devoid of pity, the ridged edge of his cock hooking onto your clit and making you jolt, before he slipped inside you inch by inch, sending you back into a pleasurable fog. “I’ll breed you until you’re full for me.” 
“So full, I’m so full, darling.” You hooked your arms around his neck, holding him impossibly close, his lips already attached to your neck again, shuddering against him as he drank down your life-source, his cock offering your cunt a delicious stretch each time he pounded into you. “So good, Hwa, it feels so good…” 
“Because we were made for each other, my love, our souls always intertwined, forever, you’ll always be mine,” Seonghwa reminded you in between pants and soft moans, his raven hair already plastered to his forehead with sweat, love and admiration seeping its way through his lust-struck gaze, kneading his hands into your thighs, your warm, sopping-wet cunt enveloping his cock so tightly, he couldn’t keep himself from unloading wave after wave of his hot cum inside you, so deeply it reached your womb. “Fuck, you’re milking my cock, darling, just take it all, take it all for me…”
You couldn’t say anything, only letting out a near soundless whine, clutching the back of Seonghwa’s head, never breaking eye contact as you experienced what could only be described as pure bliss, your bodies and hearts melting together. “I love you, Seonghwa, so much,” you finally got out, your voice barely above a whisper. 
“I love you too, Y/N, more than you’ll ever know,” he replied just as softly, barely caressing your face, like he was afraid you would shatter into a thousand pieces and fall away from his grasp. Seonghwa was completely flushed, his long raven hair now a mess, sticking to his sweaty face, his plush lips a deep red. “Now do you see what you do to me, darling?”
You nuzzled into him, your heart beating against his quiet one, the cool night breeze gracing your warm, joined skin, knowing you wouldn’t have it any other way. “I think I have an idea.”
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thisonehere · 5 months
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The webs we weave
You are the weaver, once a mere mortal(???) who centuries ago challenged Liu Kang to a weaving competition. The loser had to grant a request from the winner. Spoiler alert: you won. Your request: Immortality and eternal youth and beauty. The usual. Nowadays you are known across the realms for your work... among other things.
Shang Tsung, Kung Lao, Johnny Cage, Bi-Han, Kuai Liang, Kitana, Mileena, & Liu Kang
A/N: Serious intros mixed with flirting and just the right amount of almost-smut. Be sure to send any other ideas you might have.
Shang Tsung
Y/n: Does my skill flatter you, sorcerer?
Shang Tsung: It amuses, maybe I'll let you live after all.
Shang Tsung: I must say, now that I see your work in person. It's quite... mediocre.
Y/n: Mediocre? MEDIOCRE?
Shang Tsung: That Liu Kang lost to you speaks volumes.
Y/n: I can say the same about you losing to him.
Y/n: You're... you're very charming for a villain.
Shang Tsung: Do I make you weak in the knees, Y/n?
Shang Tsung: That silk coat you made me had acidic venom in the fibers!
Y/n: *grins* Oops.
Y/n: The silk sheets have been crafted as you requested.
Shang Tsung: Excellent, now I just need you on them to make it complete.
Kung Lao
Kung Lao: I need a new costume, something that matches my greatness.
Y/n: Of course, I think I have some leftover pieces of scrap from Raiden.
Kung Lao: You know what, I like you.
Y/n: *rolls eyes* Wow, thank you so much. Your validating me makes me feel so special.
Y/n: What would you like me to make you?
Kung Lao: A nice, big, soft cover. We'll need it for our honeymoon.
Kung Lao: Why do you have so many spiders?
Y/n: I like having company as I spin my threads.
Y/n: Keep you and your hat out of my workshop!
Kung Lao: Oh come on, all I did was accidentally cut some of the work that took you years to complete.
Kung Lao: You should come with me to Madam Bo's.
Y/n: NO. My tab with her is big enough.
Johnny Cage
Johnny: If I knew spiders could be so hot, I'd still smash them all day.
Y/n: I'll never forgive you for killing Gunter!
Johnny: I've got this sweet idea for a new look.
Y/n: Of course, but I'll need your measurements... I need you to get naked, Johnny.
Johnny: Just so you know, I'm cool with doing nudity.
Y/n: Johnny, I'm a weaver, not a sculptor.
Johnny: You got to become my costume designer, we'd kill it on the red carpet.
Y/n: That would be a dream, Johnny!
Johnny: Y/n..that's such a beautiful name. It almost makes me want to sing.
Y/n: Please don't, your musical flopped for a reason.
Johnny: I don't think Christina will ever come back.
Y/n: Remember Johnny, I'll be here for you...With open arms, open legs, and an open mouth.
Bi-Han
Y/n: I'll make nothing for you!
Bi-Han: Good, I want you, not your talents.
Bi-Han: You are living proof of Liu Kang's incompetence.
Y/n: Says the man who lost to two farmers.
Bi-Han: I was holding back against Raiden and Kung Lao.
Y/n: Oh, Bi-Han, you don't need to lie to impress me.
Bi-Han: I'll freeze your little insects and leave you defenseless.
Y/n: A. They're Arachnida, B. Pick up a book, and C. Some of us like the cold.
Y/n: Your bed must be so cold.
Bi-Han: Come lay in it with me and find out.
Bi-Han: Let me guess, you think your love can "fix me"?
Y/n: Who said I wanted to fix you?
Kuai Liang
Kuai Liang: Your growing relationship with Bi-Han is concerning.
Y/n: Oh Kuai, don't tell me you're getting jealous.
Y/n: Come to me, Scorpion. I burn for you.
Kuai Liang: You've been spending too much time with Johnny.
Y/n: Perhaps you and I coul-
Kuai Liang: I'm sorry, but I'm spoken for.
Kuai Liang: Harumi loved the tapestry.
Y/n: Only the best for her.
Y/n: Are sure?
Kuai Liang: The feeling I had for you are gone now.
Kuai Liang: What have you been planning?
Y/n: Just a little present for your wedding, specifically for the honeymoon.
Kitana
Kitana: Can I hope to have your loyalty in my ongoing battle with Shao?
Y/n: I guess we both shall see.
Kitana: You beat Lord Liu Kang!?
Y/n: Of course, when it comes to combat he is my superior, but no man can best me in my craft.
Kitana: I must say, the stories about you do not do your talents or your beauty justice.
Y/n: What exactly do those stories say?
Kitana: Have you ever considered silk worms rather than spiders?
Y/n: *blech* Never, they're gross, slow, and squishy, and worse, they're all gossips.
Y/n: I already have the train ready, just needs some more embroidery.
Titan Kitana: Train? Are you making me a wedding dress?
Y/n: You and Liu Kang are so cute together.
Titan Kitana: I thank you for being so approving, but our relationship is really none of your business.
Mileena
Y/n: Why do you stare, Empress?
Mileena: I don't know, something about all those bugs around you seems...familiar...
Mileena: Your ascension to the plain of the immortals is most admirable.
Y/n: Perhaps there are some things I may be able to teach you Empress.
Mileena: Are you making wedding attire for Titan Kitana and Lord Liu Kang?
Y/n: Of course, but don't be jealous, I already have something special for you and Tanya.
Mileena: Perhaps you may stay a bit longer, teach me some of your trade.
Y/n: Of course, Empress.
Mileena: *Bloodlusted* I will rip your tongue out from through your cheek!
Y/n: Ooohhhh, cheeky.
Mileena: When I am done with you I will burn all your work to ashes for what you did!
Y/n: No, please! Mercy, MERCY!!!
Liu Kang
Y/n: You knew I'd win?
Liu Kang: I can recognize talent when I see it.
Y/n: Why did you accept my challenge even though you knew you'd lose?
Liu Kang: I was hoping for a chance to be near you.
Y/n: Who is this D'vorrah? Geras said I reminded him of her.
Liu Kang: Nothing should concern you.
Liu Kang: Please, I ask you, keep your distance from raiden.
Y/n: Why? Worried that I'll tempt your little champion?
Liu Kang: You made me a wedding dress?
Y/n: Of course, I see you as much more of a dress-wearing type of man rather than a boring old tuxedo.
Liu Kang: Be careful, Y/n, your hubris can lead to your downfall.
Y/n: What is wrong with showing a little pride in my work?
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halcyonfawn · 4 months
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the meaning behind "face the raven" theme in "wild blue yonder" and more
a continuation of this post. i need to talk about this otherwise i'll explode.
some people have also said that this theme is playing in "last christmas" and "hell bent" (thank you for pointing that out, i'm going to die) which makes it all even worse (better). therefore, this post is, more or less, destined to turn into capaldi's era brainrot. but not all of it, i promise.
you've been warned.
first of all, allow me to refresh your memory. let's look into the context of the scenes where we heard this music theme before.
"last christmas"
according to series 8 official soundtrack, this theme is a part of "every christmas is last christmas" and is heard quite clearly two times. they're both important scenes for the doctor and clara.
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too late.
a moment full of regrets and nostalgia. the doctor thinking he's lost clara again, wishing he would have come back sooner. clara reminicing her life without the doctor in it.
"so no one matched up to danny, eh?" "there was one other man, but that would never have worked out." "why not?" "he was impossible."
it is (heavily) implied that "one other man" is the doctor. does the doctor himself realise that she's talking about him? open for interpretation. but what this small exchange truly does is showing a game of saying something without actually saying it.
"can you really see no difference in me?" "clara oswald, you will never look any different to me."
yet another way of dancing around words. there's something special and touching about this last line. it is sort of a confession of unconditional love. but the word itself - love - is never spoken out loud.
then again, twelfth might be face blind.
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second chances.
now, this scene is a complete opposite of the one mentioned above. it's full of hope, anticipation, happiness. a beginning of a new arc. he is given a second chance and he takes it. the doctor asks clara to run away with him once again. and she says "yes" without hesitation, takes his hand, kisses him on the cheek.
conclusion? these two scenes are focused entirely on the doctor and clara's relationship. it is there to show their strong connection, how much they mean to one another. utter devastation at the thought of their time ending and the absolute joy of reuniting after being separated. a chance at a happy ending. which also makes the music that plays on the background their theme.
"face the raven"
"every christmas is last christmas" is now turned into "face the raven" and is asocciated with clara's death. it also makes the previous name even more heartwrenching since last christmas was literally clara and doctor's last hurrah. we can hear this piece of music appear in two scenes as well.
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clara's monologue about facing the raven.
"if danny pink can do it so can i. die right. die like i mean it, face the raven. maybe this is what i wanted. maybe this is it. maybe this is why i kept running. maybe this is why i kept taking all those stupid risks, kept pushing it."
she's accepting her fate and aknowleges her recklesness all the way throught the season 9. it was meant to be. there wasn't enough space for two doctors in the tardis.
"i let you get reckless" "why? why shouldn't i be reckless? you're reckless all the bloody time! why can't i be like you?" "clara, there's nothing special about me. i'm nothing but less breakable than you. i should've taken care of you."
this scene is also about how a human life can be so very short compared to the time lord's and how easily it can end. it's fragile. and it's the doctor's curse: bearing the pain of losing his loved ones.
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clara meeting her fate.
as she approaches the raven, ever so brave, the doctor watches her. he hears clara scream, then witness her collapsing onto the ground. it is extremely painful, but this is, i repeat, the doctor's curse: watching his companions leave. there's no use in running away from that pain, it haunts him every step of the way.
"hell bent"
next time, "face the raven" theme can be heard during the memory wipe sequence. there is no name given for the background music in this particular moment, but it's quite obvious it represents loss and... letting go?
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the doctor is about to make clara forget their time together (does that ring a bell, anyone?).
it is worth pointing out that the music becomes the loudest at the exact moment the doctor says:
"look how far i went for fear of losing you. this has to stop. one of us has to go."
it is the culmination of their relationship. companions that push each other to extremes. together they might destroy the whole universe in order to keep each other safe. there's no other way but to separate. they've formed such a strong connection than one is ought to forget the other.
even though at first the doctor is determined to wipe clara's memories, he then admits she is right: it is unfair to take away all that wonderful time they had from her. so he gives her a choice. or, more like, an offer to play a russian roulette. it's either you or me. i'm not going to press that button. we will do this together.
to summarise: all of these moments featured a strong connection between clara and the doctor. it also tells us a story about how hard it is to lose someone you care about deeply, especially for the doctor.
how is it all connected to the doctor and donna?
memory wipe
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the doctor has to make donna and clara forget about him in order to keep them safe. expect that he doesn't give donna a choice, wiping her memory almost instantly, without saying a proper goodbye to her. obviously, he didn't have enough time to think of a better way to solve the problem since donna wouldn't have lasted long. however, it is still a decision he regrets making.
from "the star beast":
"i'm so glad you're back, donna. it killed me, it killed me, it killed me."
if we take a look at clara's situation, it's a bit different. i've already mentioned it above: at first, the doctor wants to do the same thing to clara that he did to donna. make her forget. expect, this time he is confronted for doing so (even threatened, at some point).
"these have been the best years of my life and they're mine."
i think this line triggers something in the doctor. because this is when he realises that this is not the right thing to do. not exactly. he'd already done it once and he regretted it. so this time, he offers a slightly different solution. someone still has to forget, but they'll press that button together. it's a mutual choice.
now, i know it's not entirely related to the dialogue in "wild blue yonder", but i think it's worth mentioning that donna and clara's stories are somewhat similar. i'm sure it's been said before, but it's still important.
donna's story was incomplete because she wasn't given a choice. now, that she remembers, 14th doctor makes sure their time together is worth-while. a second chance just like in "last christams".
too alike
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another similarity between these two stories is that clara and donna are not entirely humans. not anymore.
donna's half timelord. even though her head is still not big enough to fit all the doctor's memories, she still has a part of the doctor in her.
clara's frozen in time, that makes her practically immortal. she risks her life, she reverses the polarity of the neuroblock, she gets her own tardis, she's even reffered to as "clara who" at the end of "hell bent". she has become the doctor in a sense.
but there can only be one doctor. so where's the story heading to at this point, i wonder? but we'll come back to this question later.
"but what really happened?"
before i say anything, it is obvious that the doctor's silence before and after he says "a lot" is him reminicing all that'd happened to him during the 11th, 12th and 13th reincarnations. all of the loss and pain he went through.
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but why "face the raven" theme of all things? it could be a general theme of grief/nostalgia/painful memories, nothing else implied.
but please let me be delusional for a bit longer!
just as that scene in "hell bent" brought the doctor back to the moment he made donna forget him, could it be that bringing back his best friend's memories in a whole universe that "he absolutely loves", also reminded him of another important person in his life with similar story? just like "hell bent" mirrored "the journey's end", "wild blue younder" gave us a reference to "hell bent".
this is where we get back to the question about the current story direction.
foreshadowing?
donna's story is not over. and there are a lot of possibilities how it can end.
say, there is a connection to clara's story here, i wonder if that's where the plot's heading. in one of the trailers, the doctor does say "i'm not sure if i can save you this time" to donna. and it worries me. then again, maybe they're just tricking us into thinking something bad will happen (oh the drama).
i'd say it's unlikely donna's going to die because that would be absolutely devastating after just bringing her back. at the very least, the ending wouldn't be completely "happily ever after". perhaps, sacrifices will be made in order to prevent something truly horrible from happening.
why did this face come back?
in "the girl who died" twelfth doctor finally realises why he got his face. it is a call-back to "the fires of pompei" (don't even get me started on its being the episode with 10th and donna).
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the message the doctor was giving to himself turned out to be:
"i'm the doctor and i save people!"
but what is 14th trying to tell himself?
i think it's about donna and more.
he's fixing his mistake of erasing her memories and depriving her of the right to remember amazing things that'd happened to her.
it's a reminder to actually tell people how much they mean to him. as we can see, 14th's more open with his feelings and constantly shows signs of affection towards his loved ones, even breaking the "never say i love you" rule.
it's about being honest and open with people because they deserve to hear it from him and he deserves to hear it back. because "things happen and then it's too late".
again, take 12th doctor, for instance. he constantly represses his feelings. but in my humble opinion, the reason why he's changed by season 10 was clara. she pulled him out of the dark place. and even though her death almost threw him back to that state again, he is still a better man by season 10.
but there were things left unsaid. love and care were always there but it was never said out loud. kind of the same thing happened with 13th.
i strongly believe that donna is that person for 14th. they're best friends who love each other deeply. and after the doctor lost her and got a second chance to fix everything, he does, he's being affectione. he's finally open with his feelings.
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conslusion: why did you make us read all fo this?
to answer the question in the title: it's all tied with how memories are important and priceless, fixing past mistakes, moving on and learning to treasure every moment with people you care about like it's your last.
it can also be a foreshadowing for something terrible, but i choose to hope for the better.
─── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ──
aaaand that is the end of my doctor who rant. thank you for getting this far, if you did!
my feelings about all of this can be described with this one meme:
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imagine-that-100 · 2 months
Text
Will We Talk? | Part 4 |
Description of Part 1: Alex Turner x Reader | Being Katie Cook’s best friend means you see a lot of a certain band, so it’s too bad that the lead singer can’t seem to stand being in your presence. You’re all too aware that you get chatty when you’re anxious, and despite being around each other for a decade, Alex still makes your heart race (and not in a good way). But then he asks a question you never expected to hear, and it changes everything: “Do I make you nervous?”
Word Count: 18.2k
A/N: It's finally here oh my lord. Once again so sorry my writing takes so long these days but I'm so excited about this chapter. Thank you for the suggestions I got after I dropped the teaser, really appreciate all the help and it got my mind back into writing mode again. After this there's only one part left, but its going to be fun so don't fret. Really hope you enjoy this part, please let me know what you think. Thank you so so much for reading. Enjoy x
| My Masterlist | 
| Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 |
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The run up to Christmas was fun. Fucking Alex every other day of the week had been a surprisingly needed stress relief that a month ago you would have never foreseen. Usually the run up to Christmas had you stressed for no reason in particular but this year with your stresses finally being relieved every other night it was so much better than other Christmas breaks you’ve had in a long time. 
Alex had certainly been making the most of your arrangement. It was him texting or calling you asking, “Are you free tonight?” Which may as well be directly translated to ‘Do you want to fuck me tonight?’. Every single time you said yes, not depriving yourself of such simple pleasures and it led to you having a very relaxed holiday season. 
And now Christmas is over and done with, you were excited for tonight’s New Year’s party. So much so that you couldn’t sit at home and just wait to get ready, you ended up texting Katie and asking her if you could help her set up and thankfully she said yes. 
For the past hour you’ve been listening to music and hearing the Cook's Christmas stories of Forest getting all excited when he opened each present. She showed you a couple of videos before Jamie took the little man out for the afternoon while you both got the house ready for tonight. 
Your catch ups are the best and you adore your best friend so much. The gossiping and the giggling never ceases and you’re forever finding new things to talk about, it’s a miracle you’ve not discovered everything there is to know about each other after a decade of being best friends. 
But it turns out there are some things you are yet to discover. Like a certain holiday that was being planned. 
“You’re coming on the impromptu trip away with us, right?” Katie asks, a little out of the blue as if she’s just remembering as she unpeels the Happy New Year banners from each other and handing one to you. 
“Depends, when?” You tell her, knowing the dates of this trip will be the deal breaker if you can go, “I’m back in work on the ninth, remember?”
You’ve joined the Cooks on impromptu trips away before, both with their family and their friends. You’re always invited, which you find thoughtful of Katie and knowing that these trips tend to be very random, you’d started saving money for such events so you didn’t find yourself missing out. The only time you denied yourself was when the trips clashed with work which you hope isn’t the case this time. 
“Oh, we come back on the seventh.” Katie grins, very pleased with what you’ve just said, “You’re coming.” 
“Yeah,” You find yourself giggling at her, knowing she probably wouldn’t take no for an answer anyway. You continue putting up the party decorations as you tell her, “Just let me know how much it is and I’ll scramble it together.”
“Oh no, Alex is paying for us all,” She tells you, as she seems to be having a hard time stretching the balloons out to start blowing them up, “You just need spending money.” 
You immediately frown hearing that, bluetacking the banner on the wall and turning towards your best friend to ask, “What?”
“Alex is paying.” She tells you, “It’s for his birthday. Has he not told you about it yet?”
“No, he’s not mentioned it.” You tell her. 
You figure it’s best to neglect mentioning how the singer only talks to ask how you are before he ends up saying the filthiest things into your ear as he fucks you senseless. Holidays and other things normal friends would talk about are not on the cards. 
He comes over. You fuck. He leaves. Interaction complete. 
“Oh well, he probably expected me to ask you.” Katie shrugs, not thinking much of it, “But yeah don’t worry about the money, he’s paying.”
You’ll see about that, you think as you continue helping your best friend decorate, putting the singer out of your head for the time being. 
~*~*~*~
I need to speak to you 
You text the singer as you’re walking home from Katie’s. You thought about just leaving it but you know if you keep what you're feeling bottled in it will just make you go back into your shell when you’re around him, and that’s the last thing either of you want. 
Thankfully those thoughts don’t have enough time to fester because about 2 minutes later Alex texts you back. 
Christ
Am I in trouble? x
His response makes you roll your eyes as you can practically hear him asking you. You know for a fact he will have snorted when he got the message through and when he typed that one back to you. So you keep him in limbo for a bit. 
You’re not funny 
Phone me when you’re free. 
Thankfully you’re not waiting for ages for the call. Your phone starts ringing as you turn the corner and head down your road. It’s a little embarrassing how excited you are to get back in your house for a bit and just relax until the party later. 
After greeting him, Alex gets straight to the point, “What’s up Y/N?”
“About this holiday,” You start, “Katie told me she wants me to come and I want to know how you feel about that before I start to spiral.”
You can already sense the panic in your chest as you feel like you’re at a bit of a stalemate. You don’t want to let Katie down but you’re also definitely not going to go if Alex wants a break from you. You don’t want to intrude on his holiday. Especially one that’s for his birthday. 
“Don’t spiral.” Alex begs, and you swear he’s also outside as you can almost hear the way he takes a drag of a cigarette before he says, “The last thing we need is you spiralling and questioning everything again.”
You can picture the smile tugging at his lips as he says that. So much so that him finding your panic amusing means that you silently want to scorn him. 
“I’m well aware of that.” You say a little bit too bluntly, so you attempt to soften the blow when you follow up with a rhetorical, “Why do you think I asked you to call me?”
Alex definitely mutes a laugh, covering it by him pretending to clear his throat. To make sure he doesn’t get himself into trouble he distracts you by asking, “What’s panicking you now?”
“The holiday.” You take a deep breath before you start to vent your worries, “Apparently it’s for your birthday, I don’t know if you want me there with what’s going on with us. The fact that you’re apparently paying... I don’t want you paying for me if I come.”
“I did tell Katie to invite you if she wanted to.” Alex reveals. 
“That’s not the point. Do you want me there?” You ask him directly, “I don’t want to intrude on a holiday that’s for your birthday.”
Alex takes a second to answer that, not because it’s a difficult answer but mostly because he wants to know, “If we weren’t sleeping together would you come?”
You think about it for a second and realise that you probably would, but not without speaking to him and asking Katie at least 30 times if you were actually welcome. Not to mention trying not to interact with him much when you were out there. And you certainly would not be allowing him to pay for you. 
“I still would have double checked with you first, or got Katie to. But that doesn’t matter, it’s different now,” You start talking about your reality again, “The dynamic has changed.”
“Y/N, we were friends anyway,” Alex sighs and you’re glad he can’t see the way your face contorted in disagreement. “The only thing that’s different this time is that we’ve seen each other naked.” 
You almost scoff. 
You’ve done a lot more than see me naked, sir. 
Feeling flustered at the memories of him fucking you flooding back to your mind, you just get back to the point, “So, do you want me there or not?”
And you listen to his response as you unlock your front door and get into your house. Feeling the absence of the chill from outside makes the singers answer all the more bearable. 
“I just want you to do whatever you want to. You can come and have a holiday. I don’t expect anything from you if that’s what you’re worried about.” Alex says sincerely, before adding, “And I am paying.”
“I don’t want you to pay Alex,” You whine like a child not getting their own way. But you add honestly, “It makes me uncomfortable.”
And it’s not even just because you’re fucking him, although that is your main concern. It’s the fact that you’ve barely known him properly before now (and you still wouldn’t say you were all that close in any way but physically), you can’t in your right mind let him spend thousands on a skiing holiday for you.  
“Y/N, I didn’t invite you to make you feel uncomfortable.” The singer sighs, feeling like you should know this already. 
He’s not ever excluded you from something before and he’s certainly not about to start doing so now. And he’s not letting you pay for yourself when everyone else who is coming is paid for already. Christ, he doesn’t really know why this is even a conversation when everything has already been sorted and paid for in advance. 
You feel like you’re whining when you again admit, “I know that’s not the intention but I still feel it Alex.”  
“Well, it’s up to you.” Alex shrugs, hoping to convey how much he’s unbothered by the fact he’s paying for a holiday, but he doesn’t want to pressure you. “You’re very welcome to come and I’m paying for everyone, not just you.”
“But-“ You start but then stop yourself. 
Alex immediately questions, “But what?”
He would rather know what’s going on in your head rather than be left guessing. He needs to know how best to reassure you otherwise you both will just regress. And he doesn’t think that wanting for your honesty is too much to ask.
You can’t bring yourself to say it. So you just leave him with silence. 
But that silence speaks volumes. 
“You worried that if I pay for you to come I’m expecting you to shag me?” A few beats of silence pass and as you don’t dismiss him entirely, he already knows it to be true. His question is entirely rhetorical, “That’s it, isn’t it?”
You can’t even confirm it for him. It’s embarrassing to admit, but that is a worry of yours. 
“Y/N.” Alex sighs, knowing he’s right because of your silence. “I don’t expect anything from you, you know that right? You can come away with us and we don’t have to do anything.”
“It’s not compulsory, even when we’re home. Y/N/N, you’re Katie’s best friend, you’ve been around for ten years.” He backs up his point some more, “You came on the last holiday we went on, this is going to be no different to that. My birthday just happens to fall on a day whilst we’re there.” 
“You didn’t pay for me last time Al.” You argue in a slight huff, already feeling like you’re fighting a losing battle. 
“Hey, listen to me.” Alex persists, “I’m paying for everyone to come, not just you, and I’m not expecting a huge orgy all week.” 
You can help the laugh that escapes your lips at that. It’s a full giggle that the singer can’t help but grin at as he takes another drag of his cigarette. 
“There’s that laugh.” He hums, enjoying the sound even more purely because it’s him that’s caused it. 
Only after your laughter subsides, do you ask, a lot calmer now, “Are you sure you want me there?” 
“Yes, sweet.” Alex assures you. And just to convince you some more, he adds, “I need someone to entertain Mrs Cook when I pull Jamie away for a pint anyway. Think you fit the brief.” 
“Ah yeah, I think I could do that for you.” You chuckle a little, but then you’re serious in a soft tone, “I still feel bad that you’re paying though Alex. Skiing holidays are a lot of money.”
“I have a lot of money that I’ll never need.” The singer tells you, and you try not to think about the way anxiety in your chest dissipates when he says, “I’d rather treat my friends to a week away.”
You're his friend. Something so simple shouldn’t make your heart swell. Especially when the other night he tongue fucked you until you came, twice. 
“Well I’m buying you food and drinks whilst we’re away then.” You counter, finally readying yourself to admit defeat. 
“We’re going all inclusive but thanks.” You can almost hear Alex’s smirk. 
You sigh, dropping down onto your settee and leaning back to try and get comfy, “Well I’m assuming we won’t be staying in the hotel for your birthday. They’ll be pubs and cafes I’m sure.” 
He counters, “I’ll take a drink at the airport before we go.” 
“Okay deal.” You accept but know you’ll find ways to do more than just that, “Thank you Alex. You really don’t have to do this.”
“Well I want to.” Alex smiles, and his tone is full of amusement as he says, “And I can’t have you spiralling.”
You hum in a silent laugh at that and let your eyes close as you take a deep breath. You’re about to tell him that it’s just how you are but you’re okay now you’ve spoken about it. But he takes your attention again. 
“You know that this goes both ways right, Y/N/N?” You’re about to ask him what he’s on about until he continues, “If I text you asking to come over, you can say no and I’m not going to be offended by it. I understand that it’s not going to happen every time.” 
He’s talking about fucking you. And trying to make you feel more at ease about your situationship. 
Alex finishes off by saying, “I just ask on the off chance that you’re up for it.”
“I am always up for it.” Are the words that slip from your lips, and when you realise what you’ve said, your eyes shoot open. 
Oh my god woman, you sound so needy. Backtrack now. Now!
You sit up as you begin to pathetically backtrack, “Well. I mean, I- when you say you are, I, I- usually am too.”
“Good to know you’re always up for me, sweet,” You can hear Alex's smirk then, but thankfully he doesn’t tease you more for it he just carries on to say, “It seems like I’m texting you all the time asking to come over but you can text me. You’re allowed to get horny too.” 
You try and fail not to flush at hearing him say that. Especially when you can feel the ghost of his touch as you’re sitting on the settee he had you ride him on a week ago. 
“Alex, you’re over twice a week, if not more... It’s not like I’m without relief for long.” To drive the point home you say, “It’s not a ten month wait again.”
In your little meetings you’d discussed when you’d both last been with someone else. Yours was a guy you were seeing at the beginning of the year who turned out to just not do it for you after you dated him for a few months. 
Alex’s last fling was another rebound of his after the French girl he cheated on Taylor with. Turns out Alex hadn’t been with anyone in the last 5 months which did surprise you a little. But who are you to presume he’d just become a slag after his break up? 
“Still. We started this for a reason.” Alex drives the point home, wanting you to fully understand, “You can say no and you can call me whenever you want too.” 
You nod even though he can’t see you, “I know.”
“Maybe this holiday can just be the friends you’re so persistent we’re not.” 
You frown, confused, “What?”
“Your rule, ‘no sex while we’re away’.” Alex smirks, but he’s sincere when he says, “To make you feel more comfortable. 
“I don’t wanna seem like a prude Alex I just don’t…” You fail to continue your sentence, Wanna seem like a prostitute. 
“I think of all people, I’m not the one who’s going to think of you as a prude, sweet.” The singer can't help but tease, finding himself funny. 
You take a deep breath, trying not to let your amusement or embarrassment show, “So where are we going?”
“The Alps.” The singer tells you almost smugly, “Where else?”
You decide that you may as well ask him for the details if he’s sorting everything out, “When do we go?”
“Early morning of the second, we need to be at the airport for like four.” He tells you after a moment of thought. 
You hum, finally letting the excitement for a holiday bubble in your stomach, “Okay.”
Alex is smiling already hearing you finally sound at ease about the holiday, but he can’t help but push his luck a little more, “You free tonight, sweet?”
“No and neither are you,” You almost laugh, the amusement clear in your voice, “We’ve got Katie’s New Year’s party.”
Alex is grinning as he comes back with, “I mean at like three in the morning.”
“You’re a horny fuck.” You can’t help but tell him as you shake your head. 
You’re entirely unable to stop your face from flushing, making you very grateful he can’t see you. All you hope is he’s picturing you with a completely unbothered yet 
“You’re the one that just said you’re always up for me.” Alex counters and you have to bite your tongue. 
Idiot Y/N. 
“See you later Alex.” You immediately dismiss him, not wanting his teasing right now. 
Alex laughs loudly, “See you later sweet.”
~*~*~*~ January 2nd 2019 ~*~*~*~
The Alps are absolutely mesmerising and you could stare at the snow covered mountains for days. The trip was certainly worth every single ounce of effort and you know you’ll be eternally grateful to Alex for him bringing you all here. 
You’re sure when you first got here you looked like a child in a toyshop. The views are absolutely stunning and you know for a fact that your jaw was agape as you took in the breathtaking scenery around you. 
So much so that Alex turned you towards him at one point and pushed your jaw back up and quietly teased, “Don’t let anyone else see those pretty lips parted like that, don’t want people getting ideas.”
Needless to say, you flushed hearing that and Alex wasn’t subtle about the way he let his smirk take over his face. And then he left you hanging, sauntering off to join Miles, Nick, and Jamie walking just in front of you, leaving you to catch up with Katie, Kristen, and Flo who all joined you for the holiday. 
Alex leaving you like this hadn’t been the only time since you’d woken up early today though. He’d been a tease since he picked you up to take you to the airport, asking if you’d recovered from the previous nights activities where he all but folded you into a pretzel and fucked you until you came on his cock. 
That wasn’t the beginning or end of your antics after the party, he’d teased you at Katie’s party, getting you in the mood and ready for him when he pulled you to a quieter bit of the party and pushed you against the wall to kiss you, taking away any sense but him. And he did it every time to leave you wanting more only for him to pull away and leave you to your own devices for a while. 
So you were desperate when it got to 3am and he was practically pulling you down the road so you could get back to your house. And he certainly did show you a good time until you practically passed out from the exhaustion. 
You woke up late the next morning to a glass of water and some painkillers on your bedside table along with a note that read, Hope you’re not too sore sweet x
It wasn’t hard to guess he probably felt a hint of guilt how far you’d both gone the night before. In the heat of the moment he said somethings about him wanting you to remember him, the feel of him inside you, over the week that you were both away. 
He kept making you regret the no sex on holiday rule. Alex kept saying how you'd be begging him to take you when you got back home, how you’d not be able to walk properly by the time he’d finished with you after a week of not touching him the way he knows your filthy mind craves him.
You're ashamed to admit that your thoughts about him are sometimes so dirty they belong down the gutter. He’d certainly made a good job of having you long for him. 
You try not to admit to yourself that you crave him. That when he decided that he was the one that was going to be sitting next to you on the plane and not Flo, you were happy. Not because you had any issue with Flo, no she was such an amazing friend to you, but because it was Alex. And he wanted to sit beside you. 
The little shit that he was though teased you the whole journey. You were still tired so when you sighed and closed your eyes once you’d relaxed after the take off, Alex whispered into your ear, “Did I work you too hard sweet?”
“Don’t flatter yourself.” You say as you feel yourself flush knowing he was to do with your fatigue. 
You slept in a little on New Year’s Day after you’d taken the painkillers he’d left out for you, but then your day was spent packing for this trip, figuring out what you’d need and calling Katie to double checking on if you’d need going out clothes and doing a checklist of the skiing things you actually own. 
By the time you went to bed it was 11pm and that was far later than you should have been going to sleep because you had to be up at 3am to get ready. So it was do to Alex fucking you hard and long enough on New Years and the fact you had so little sleep last night that you were tired on the plane. 
Next, he’s disturbing your attempt at sleep by him putting his hand on your thigh and leisurely trailing his hand up and down, mixed with him occasionally squeezing. He keeps an eye on your reaction to him, you going stiff for a few seconds and him taking great pleasure in saying, “I’ve done worse than putting my hand on your thigh, sweet.”
“Not in public or daylight.” You huff and try to get yourself comfy enough to get sleepy. 
Looking out of the window just has you mesmerised so after a few minutes you just end up looking around the plane. It's just you and Alex sitting beside each other and for some reason you’re not all that close to your friends. 
Katie, Kirsten, and Flo are all on one row, about 4 seats ahead of you, and Miles, Jamie, and Nick are on the row behind them. You’ve got no idea why you’re so far away from them with the gap of strangers in front of you, but you guess things could be worse. You could be sitting alone or worse, you could be at home feeling like you’re missing out. 
There’s a stranger beside Alex so you’re glad you took the window seat and the views of sun rising through the clouds were amazing. You genuinely wish you weren’t as tired as you were so you could appreciate them fully. 
Instead you’re feeling uncomfortable and whichever way you lean your head isn’t helping you relax. If it's against the wall of the plane you can feel the vibrations, just leaning back does nothing to help and if you do fall asleep like that you’re not risking possibly snoring because your jaw is hanging open, and if you let your head fall forward that’s not good for your posture, not to mention painful. 
Maybe it’s you wriggling in your seat that gives you away, considering his hand is still on your thigh, but Alex seems to pick up on your discomfort easily. 
“You can lean on me to go to sleep, you know?” Alex tells you with a smile, nodding down to his shoulder just beside you. 
“What,” You hold back your sigh but let him know that you’re not all that impressed with his offer after his previous antics, “So you can just try to wake me up even more?” 
“Come on sweet.” Alex chuckles, rubbing your thigh again before squeezing it. “Not my fault you’re not finding it relaxing.”
Pretending that him gripping your thigh didn’t give you flashbacks to the other night, you keep your voice quiet as you raise your eyebrows accusingly, “Because you’re trying to be a tease.”
“And it’s working.” Alex smirks, clearly knowing whatever your tells are by now, he gestures to the back of the plane, “Wanna go to the bathroom?” 
Its a mixture of shock and being entirely unimpressed that has you asking, “Are you kidding?”
“Absolutely not.” Alex grins, holding his chuckle as he asks, “We’re not on holiday yet, technically. We could go again if you're not feeling satisfied enough before we land?” 
You don’t dignify him with an answer, you just shake your head and look away from the tease. While the thought of him fucking you and you having to be quiet because others are around seems like quite the thrill, the mere thought of doing so in a public aeroplane has you wanting gag. 
“What?” Alex fakes his hurt, nonchalantly following up with, “I know you can get horny just after you’ve woken up.”
Your head whips back to him, narrowing your eyes as you scold, “You’re being loud.” 
He wasn’t. His voice was just above a whisper. But the mere fact you were on a plane with the possibility of anyone around you eavesdropping has you getting all embarrassed and flustered in an instant.
“Sorry,” Alex barely holds back his grin. “I’ll be subtle about it when I take you in the bathroom.”
Instead of scowling, you lean your head back on the seat, close your eyes, and take a deep breath so you don’t end up smacking him. Taking a few seconds to calm your anxiousness down and try not to let his joking get you too embarrassed when you know he isn’t trying to be malicious, you just stay like that silently. 
But Alex disturbs your peace, “You don’t have to think about it so intently Y/N/N, we can just do it.”
“No.” You look at him again, and say even quietly to try and further your point, “Not to mention everyone would see.”
Alex can’t help but take that though as you just don’t want to right now. In such a public setting. That’s not you saying that you’d never be ready to join the mile high club.
“Oh okay, remind me to take you on a private jet.” Alex squeezes your thigh again, before winking, “They mind their business on those.” 
You’re lost for words for a brief moment. Taking in exactly what that means, and you end up half frowning. 
“Way to persuade me.” You scoff, “Telling me you’re already in the mile high club.” 
Sarcasm is thick in your voice as you say, “Such a turn on.”
The singer can’t help but smirk though, “Don’t be jealous now, sweet.” 
After that, Alex seems to give you a break from his endless torment. He takes his hand from your thigh as he reaches down to his bag by his feet and takes out the word search book he bought himself in WHSmiths at the airport. Finally you feel like you can relax and sleep for the remainder of the 2 hour flight. 
Or you hoped so anyway, but it seems the vibrations of the plane's wall just wanted you conscious. So it was with a huff you leant back against the headrest once more. 
“Just,” Alex sighs and he picks his hand up to cup the side of your face to gently push your head on his shoulder. 
Instant comfort was an understatement compared to the wall and the seat. But you still felt weird about it. 
You tell him with a sigh, “I don’t want to annoy you.”
“You don’t annoy me at all, Y/N/N.” He dismisses immediately, paying you no more attention after saying, “Go to sleep.”
And so you did. You got a good hour’s sleep and you think it was only when the plane started to make a steady descent that your body woke you up as a result of the decrease in altitude. But you woke up gently and slowly, and you realised you were still on Alex’s shoulder long before you opened your eyes. 
You found yourself not wanting to move. The woody scent of his aftershave leaves you in a little trance all the time and you never want to bring yourself out of it. So you just blinked your eyes open slowly and told your body not to even twitch to give away that you were awake. 
And Alex didn’t notice because you now see he’s entirely too engrossed in his book. Charlotte Bronte’s Jane Eyre.
A true classic, you can’t help but tiredly smile as you see he’s about to get to one of your favourite bits of the book. You following pretty easily for a few pages because he’s holding the book open practically as far as it can go (you’re so tired you can find it in yourself to shudder at the fact the book will definitely have a cracked spine) in one hand, and you only noticed when he turned the pages that his other had gone back to gently resting on your thigh.
Everything is good for about 5 minutes, but then the singer started reading too fast for you at one of your favourite bits, so you end up having to say a quiet, “Go back,” 
“What?” You feel Alex turn his head towards you a little, his jaw gently nudging your head but you don’t make a single effort to move.
“Hadn’t finished the page,” You tell him and Alex can’t help but smile as he turns the page back for you.  
His only indication that you’re ready to move on is the slight nod of your head and Alex even angles the book towards your direction a little more so you can both read. He smiles at the way you haven’t attempted to move from his shoulder at all, seemingly quite comfy. 
You both continue reading together for the next few pages until the same thing happens again where Alex turns the page too soon. This time you whine a little as you whisper, “Too fast.”
“Not had you complain about my speed before.” Alex can’t help but tease when the opportunity is right there for the taking, but all it earns him is a poke in his side which makes him jump and he just about peers down at you seeing you smiling victoriously.
After this you fall into a rhythm of you nodding slightly when you're ready for him to turn the page. It doesn’t bother Alex at all, no it's the opposite, he finds you endearing that you’re both enjoying his book and reading it at the same time. 
The both of you become entirely engrossed in Jane Eyre’s world that you barely even acknowledge that the plane is just about ready to land. It’s only when the air hostess’ voice fills the plane as they announce over the tannoy that you’d be landing shortly, does Alex close the book. 
At the same time you reluctantly pick your head up from his shoulder, Alex offers as he taps the book, “Can borrow it after me if you want?” 
“I’ve already read it, I just love that part you’re on.” You hum, smiling at him in earnest, “Thank you though.”
And both of you know you’re not just saying thank you for that offer, but thank you for allowing you to fall asleep on him. 
The transfer to the resort even had you in awe. But when you got to the hotel and you entered your room, you were blown away by your view. 
The white mountains are stunning and you were so glad you brought your camera. This was something you definitely didn’t want to ever forget. 
The air felt like ice on your skin as you took your pictures, the bitter cold making you want to jump into the private hot tub you have on your balcony. 
You restrain yourself, saving that for later, you opt for a hot shower to settle you after that flight and you end up falling asleep in the warmest queen sized bed. 
You all meet downstairs a few hours later where you get some food and decide that you’re going to all get ready to hit the slopes, you all opting for the red runs for today. They were so much fun and with you skiing, you just find yourself in awe of Flo on her snowboard flying past you all. 
It’s a fun few hours, with you all stopping half way down the slope at one of the cafes on the mountain where you all have a hot coffee, and the lads follow it up with a beer. The lads head off before the rest of you, wanting to be speed demons and race down the rest of the way which you’re all fine with. 
You know Flo will inevitably end up beating them down anyway. Which she of course did. 
Before you set off though, you girls decide that after dinner you’re all going to have a little hot tub party. So that’s how you’re now sinking in the hot tub on your balcony, Katie already in after beating you to being the first. 
You just laugh at her rushing in there to beat you, as you take off your hotel dressing gown to reveal your dark green bikini. Katie says she loves the colour of yours as you glance back around at her and tell her you adore her maroon one. 
But it’s when you step into the tub that Katie gasps, loud enough for you to pause as you stand in the pool of bubbling water. 
“What are they?” Katie points to your thighs with wide eyes. 
Your bruised beyond belief thighs. Dark, almost purple bruises that litter the tops of your thighs which were left by the mouth of the singer next door. 
“Y/N!” Katie yells, her jaw dropped as she looks at the assault on your skin, “What the fuck?” 
“Katie, stop looking at me.” You get all flustered and embarrassed so you're about to sit down, but your best friend grabs your hips to stop you so she can look at the dark marks for longer. 
“Oh my fucking god.” She shakes her head, too shocked by the sheer amount of them. “It’s hard not to when you have those on your thighs Y/N!”
“Please stop, can we just pretend you didn’t see them.” You pry yourself out of her grip and finally immerse yourself into the hot water, loving the chill dissipating from your body. 
“No, I want the gossip.” Katie grabs her glass of prosecco you’d poured her and left on the side of the tub along with yours and the other girls that were meant to be coming shortly. “How’s it been going between you two?” 
“Fine.” You nod with a coy smile as you reach for your glass. 
Your best friend shakes her head, “I’m not settling with fine.” 
“It’s good.” You take a long sip of your drink, knowing you’ll need it if you’re having this conversation, “I guess he keeps me on my toes.”
“In what way?” She prys. 
You think about how to word your feelings for a second. The sound of the jets humming in the cold air fills the brief silence until you end on, “I’m still not used to having a booty call or being one. I still get a text off him and it throws me... He still makes me nervous.”
“That’s good though.” Katie hums and nods, “He’d be boring if he didn’t make you nervous.”
“Yeah, I guess.” You nod in agreement. 
But your best friend enquires, “He’s not making you nervous in general now, right? Just when he comes on to you?”
“No, it's a lot better.” You explain honestly, sinking into the water a little more. “But I’m still not at ease if that makes any sense. I still find him difficult to read.”
“That just comes with time.” Katie nods, understanding you entirely, “When you start spending more time with him, you’ll figure it out.”
“Well that doesn’t really happen,” You mumble a little but seeing as she heard you and noting that sparkle in her eye for the gossip, you explain, “He sort of just shows up and we fuck and then he leaves.”
Katie frowns a little at that though, “Thought he took you out?”
“That was just until I felt more comfortable around him. We’ve not carried that on.” You almost cringe when you say, “We’re just shagging now.”
“And how’s that going?” Your best friend smirks, “The bruises seem like a good sign.”
You sigh, “Yeahhh.” taking another sip of your drink. 
“What was that sigh for?” She calls you out. 
You try to pass it off immediately, “Nothing.”
But she’s not having any of it, “S’not nothing, come on.”
“He was just a tease on the plane but he’s doing it on purpose.” Your cheeks heat up a bit as you tell her. 
“Getting you ready for later.” She grins and gives you some teasing suggestive eyes herself. 
You gently shake your head, “I don’t think so.”
“Oh?” Katie raises her eyebrows, “What does that mean?”
Oh fuck. 
“Don’t make me explain Katie.” You pout. 
She pushes you, “Come onnnn.”
You just sigh in defeat and say, “We’re not doing that right now.”
“Excuse me?” Your best friend is now even more confused. 
“You heard me Kate.” You sigh, closing your eyes not wanting to explain yet another of your stupid thoughts to her. 
For clarity’s sake she has to ask, “Weren’t you with him twice last week?”
“We shagged on Boxing Day and then the 28th and New Years.” You tell her. 
And it occurs to you that you’ve probably not been this active on a regular basis since you were in your late teens. Either you or Alex clearly has the sex drive of a teenager and with the state of your thighs, you think it’s more likely Alex. 
Glancing at the bruises again you can almost feel the ghost of his mouth there. You fall into the daze of remembering the way his lips attacked the tops of your thighs as he fingered you to edge you, not letting you finish until you were begging to have his tongue instead.  
He toyed with you, saying his mouth was already on you, sucking your thighs that bit more before biting them making you whine. But you were desperate to have him eat you out. Have his tongue tease and flick your clit in the way he knows makes you lose your mind. 
And he wouldn’t give in. Not until you were on the edge for the third time, right on the verge of getting bratty with him and making the right decision he compensated by eating you out until you came twice on his tongue. And the way he fucked you afterwards, god, you wish-
“And he’s not touched you since?” Katie’s question shocks you back to reality. 
You blink a few times, and shake your head, “No.” 
She smirks, almost trying to hide it behind her glass, “I bet you’re losing your mind.”
“I feel like it.” You hum, nodding. 
Katie asks, fully ready to big you up to go and knock on his door after your girls prosecco party, “Don’t you want him to touch you?”
“I want nothing more at the minute.” You tell her honestly, “But we’re not doing it until after the holiday.”
She frowns, completely confused, “Why?”
Surely on holiday is on of the best places to fuck? Why wouldn’t you be doing that? Katie can’t help but think. 
“Because he knew I felt uncomfortable about him paying for me to come and I was worried he’d expect something from me.”
“Y/N.” Her face falls and then she gently scorns you, “He’s not like that.”
“I know he isn’t Katie. But you know how my mind works. It worries me.” You shrug, not really being able to help it. 
“Well I thi-“ Katie starts but is interrupted by Florence appearing at the door of your balcony. 
“Hey,” You grin, very thankful for the conversation being cut short. 
Hopefully never to be brought up again. 
“Flo,” Katie smiles and waves her over, “Come in.”
The gorgeous woman walks out and hangs her dressing gown up before running to the tub to escape the chilly air. After commenting on how much both you and Katie like her black, glittery bikini, the artist asks you both, “What were we talking about?”
You try to think of something quickly to change the subject entirely but your best friend gets in there first and grins, “Just how Y/N/N is sleeping with Alex now and she’s seeing if she can go the holiday without.”
You might drown yourself in this hot tub. Can you get any more embarrassed today? 
Flo’s smile is huge as her head whips around to you in shock. You can tell she’s happy for you, presumably for Alex too, but she shocks you when she tells you, “Don’t deny yourself the pleasure.”
You’re so beyond confused by that statement until Katie’s eyes go wide as she gasps, “Fuck, I always forget about you two.”
You blink a few times as you hear her tell Katie that it’s understandable she’d forget because it was before her and Jamie got together. But you’re still in shock, you have to get the clarification, “You and Alex?”
You hope it doesn't sound like you’re annoyed because you’re not, no one even Alex has to tell you anything about this and clearly Flo just found out about yours and her ex’s rendezvous. You’re just confused, clearly Katie forgot but you’ve not even heard any jokes about it or any mention of it before now. 
“Yeah, a long time ago.” Flo nods and is quick to explain as she grabs her glass of prosecco. “Lost our virginities to each other back in college, but started seeing him years later.”
She continues to explain with a roll of her eyes, “But the idiot was seeing me at the same time as Alexa back on their Favourite Worst Nightmare tour so I held my tongue for about a week until I blew up and called him out in front of all the lads…” She adds quickly, “It got ugly.”
It makes your chest go tight. He did that to one of his best friends years ago, and he did to his girlfriend of three years last year. 
You're sincere when you say, “I’m so sorry.”
You feel almost embarrassed to be sleeping with him now. Especially when you’d consider Flo a friend of yours, even before this trip, when you spoke to her about her artwork that she creates at various parties you’ve both attended. She’d always been lovely to you and made you feel entirely at ease. 
And now you’re sleeping with her ex. You need the ground to open up and swallow you whole. 
“Don’t be, it worked out well in the end.” It seems that the artist can’t keep the smile off her face as she finishes her story, “I went to Manchester and Matty and my cousin, Adam, got me through it. And when the time was right and I was healed, Matty asked me out and now we’ve been together for a decade.” Her grin is huge as she proudly tells you, “Married for three and a half years.”
It’s impossible to not be happy for her, her love for her husband shining through so brightly. But you can’t help but ask her, “Why are you still friends with him? Alex, I mean.” 
You can’t imagine anyone betraying your trust that much and being close friends with them years later. 
“Oh, it took a long while and a lot of grovelling on his part. But after two years of barely speaking to him, and with how happy I was with Matty, I forgave Al and now we get on like nothing ever happened.” Flo explains, “I see the other lads too often to let it continue for a lifetime of awkwardness.”
She’s a better person than you. You could never. 
You think out loud. “The lads didn’t know he was two timing you?” 
“No,” She shakes her head, taking a sip of her drink before saying, “They were as shocked as me when Alexa showed up. Only Miles knew, and covered for him.” 
You shake your head, seeing Miles in a completely different light now. But you guess if you’re judging Alex by how he’s only been with you, you have to do the same with Miles. 
“You’re too good. I would never forgive either of them for that.” Katie gives her two cents on the situation. 
“I’ve been told that a lot. By Alex himself too... But despite last year's shit show, he has changed.” Flo assures you, but then smirks, “So enjoy him, queen.”
You sink into the water a bit more, entirely awkward about the way both women are smirking at you. 
“Don’t be embarrassed. He’s good.” Flo giggles, “God only knows that if I didn’t call him out to everyone I would have a hard time choosing between him and Matty.” 
You’re glad she’s such a lovely person and she eases you entirely. 
“Good job you’re married then.” You joke, which makes Katie also spit out her drink laughing and Flo giggles before clinking her prosecco glass with yours. 
“You should see her thighs.” Your best friend laughs. 
You shoot her the dirtiest look, “Katie!”
~*~*~*~ 
Thankfully by the time Kristen arrived the subject of you and Alex had long since been dropped. 
Flo saw your thighs and she told you about how she thinks the man will never truly grow up because he left lots of love bites on her boobs when they lost their virginities, and mercifully after that, the subject moved away and the four of you are now just chilling and listening to your a playlist that’s blaring through your phone. 
You were all giggling at nothing in particular when you got startled by two men at the balcony door. Alex and Jamie come outside in their trunks and Jamie is the one to scoff, “You all thought you could have a party without us.”
Jamie practically jumps in and sits himself down between Flo and Katie, but your attention is drawn to Alex who sinks in beside you and you half find yourself wanting to scurry over to Katie. 
He looks too good. Last time you’d seen him shirtless you were drunk and your memory hazy, but he looks so fucking good and his toned abdomen and his trunks low enough for you to clearly see that V line down to- Stop. 
Stop. 
Thankfully Alex doesn’t seem to notice the way you get a little bit more tense with him beside you. Instead he immediately asks Flo, “How’s Matty, angel?” 
“Yeah he’s good, thanks Shakespeare.” Flo smiles, and despite not understanding her nickname for him, you happily listen in to distract yourself. 
Maybe it’s to do with the Macbeth reference in If You Were There, Beware? You can’t help but wonder. Maybe you’ll ask her later. 
The singer can’t help but ask curiously, “Why didn’t he join us again?” 
“Tour rehearsals.” The artist informs him, “His UK tour starts on the ninth.”
“Fair enough,” Alex nods, clearly completely understanding the situation Flo’s husband finds himself in. “I’m glad we aren’t back on the road till late Feb now.” 
“Bet you are.” Flo smiles at him but when he tunes into Jamie’s conversation, her eyes flick to you and she smirks. 
You sink even further into the water. 
Despite Alex now being beside you, you try not to let your nervous energy take over.  No, instead you carry on as normal and have some of the funniest conversations with the people around you. You’re only thrown off when you realise that an old Arctic Monkeys song comes on through your phone and your eyes go wide when Jamie sighs, “I haven’t heard this song in so long.” 
Immediately, you tense hearing the guitar and drums at the start of Bigger Boys and Stolen Sweethearts. Fuck, this is why you don’t normally have your music on around Katie, so you don’t have this awkward interaction.
“Sorry, I didn’t realise it was in this playlist.” You say, immediately turning to reach for your phone.
Liar. You feel Alex’s eyes screaming at you, as he looks amused at the fact you like his music, as if he already didn’t know. 
“Keep it on.” Jamie tells you, and you hesitate for a split second feeling Alex’s eyes on you until his friend continues to say, “Complete nostalgia of playing it at yours Al.” 
“Yeah, it’s a gooden.” Alex smiles.
“Who was this one even about Al?” Flo asks, entirely amused, thankfully stealing the singer's attention away from you so he doesn’t see you starting to fidget, really not wanting the song to stay on.
Your knee is twitching, your foot tapping on the floor of the jacuzzi like you can’t sit still at all. Thankfully the water and the bubbles will be enough to stop you from being noticed though.
“Just that girl I fancied back in Year 11.” Alex explains, “She was in your English lessons, I think she was called-“
If you were to tell the story again, you wouldn’t have been able to name the girl at all. Just that Alex really liked her in school and never got the courage to ask her out and then some guy who was in the year above them in school ended up going out with her. 
The conversation moved on and easily past that and your awkwardness about the man you’re sleeping with catching you having his song on your playlist eases off. But then, about 10 minutes later, it happens again. 
“Fuck my life,” You whisper immediately reaching to grab your phone this time. 
Because this is so much worse. 
It’s not just that Piledriver Waltz has started to play. It’s even more embarrassing that it's the Submarine soundtrack version of the song, it’s just Alex. Not even Arctic Monkeys.  
“Didn’t know you enjoyed my music this much, sweet.” Alex can’t help but once again tease you. Finding your reactions too entertaining not to. 
The panic in your eyes when the first Monkey's song came on, but the way you swore under your breath at this one just made him want to burst out laughing. You look absolutely mortified, and clearly not wanting to get any extra teasing from himself or your friends which you were likely expecting.
But Alex isn’t one to disappoint. So of course he teased you. 
You can’t help but narrow your eyes at him, “In the nicest possible way, fuck off.” Before you quickly look for a playlist that is safe and doesn’t have any of his songs on there. 
“It’s all good Y/N.” Alex smirks, “It’s good to know I’m doing something right.”
His hand comes to rest on your thigh to stop your leg from tapping. You swallow, stopping your movements and taking a deep breath to not let it get to you that the others could see his hand on your thigh. Although you’d rather them see his hand there than the bruises he’s left. 
Thankfully the bubbles disguise it from everyone else and no one comments, but just as you ask, “What album do you want to listen to?” Miles and Nick turn up at your door with more alcohol in their hands and everyone beckons them in. 
Which is an issue for you because the hot tub is probably only meant to have 4 people in it at the most and now there’s 8 of you. So you’re unsure why it’s you and Kirsten that have drawn the short straws, but you’ve both been pulled into the laps of who you’re sleeping with. But one second you were seated closely beside Alex, and now you’re sitting on his lap, your arm having to go over his shoulder so you don't slip off as you lean into him a little. 
Kirsten and Nick, you understand, they are married. Flo not sitting in Miles’ lap, you again understand because they aren’t together. What you don’t understand is why Katie isn’t on her husband's lap when they are married and have a child. But you, who has been sleeping with this man for less than a month, has been pulled onto his lap to make more room for everyone. 
All of a sudden you feel like you’re holding your breath and can’t relax. After being submerged in the warm water for so long, most of your top half being exposed to the crisp air makes you chilly and your thighs feel far too close to the surface of the water so you feel your hands in your lap to try and disguise the bruises. 
Thankfully one of Alex’s arms comes to rest across your thighs too and he holds your thighs again. And you can’t help slipping back into that little daydream of yours. 
Of the way he pried your thighs open, as if you weren’t already willing and dripping for him. As if you weren’t begging him to eat you out anyway. And when he finally gave into your demands his fingers only dug into your skin more, holding you open entirely at his mercy. 
And when he worked you up and up until he had your back arching and his name caught in your throat as you pulled harshly on his hair. He kept going, eating up everything you had to give him until you were writhing beneath him entirely overstimulated. 
After he blissfully tortured you like that, he kissed his way up your body until you could taste yourself on his tongue. And that only lead to him fucking you till you could barely move. His cock made you see stars when he hooked his arms under your legs and moved them closer to your chest. 
The pleasure he drove into you over and over was blinding, you saw white when you came. The only thing you can remember is the way Alex groaned into your ear when you clenched around him and the way he moaned when you tugged on his sweaty hair. And the way he bit your shoulder when he got his release not a minute later. 
Not to mention the way he flipped you over when you both caught your breaths and he fu-
“I can feel you.” Alex's whisper startles you out of your memory and your eyes snap to the man you were daydreaming about. 
You all but jump off his lap, your heart racing ten to the dozen feeling like you’ve been caught red handed. But you keep calm, not letting your cheeks heat up to give you away. 
“Feel what?” You ask him, the shock slowly disappearing from your face. 
“Your pulse,” Alex tells you in a low voice, his grip on you tightening, “On my thigh.”
And it dawns on you what he means. You’re fucking throbbing, completely aching at the thought of him. And he can fucking feel you. 
Fuck offfffffff. Men can actually feel that?!
No. No. No. 
“Don’t know what you’re talking about.” You play dumb, having to because you don’t think you’ll be able to look at him again if not. 
Not that you can right now, you just look at Flo and start listening to her, Miles, and Kirsten’s conversation. Meanwhile praying to every god that there is that you calm the fuck down and you stop being horny immediately. 
“Course you don’t, sweet.” Alex kisses your shoulder and his lips linger on your skin as he smirks, “Just like you can’t feel me.”
You’re about to ask him what he means until he shifts you against him more and you can feel his erection pressed against your thigh. He’s hard. Really hard. You have to hold in the sound you want to make. 
Why the fuck did you want this ‘no fucking’ shit. You can’t stop thinking about him. The way you want to kiss him. The way you want him in your mouth. The way you want him to fill you up and fuck you like it’s the last time you’re ever going to be able to. 
You don’t even realise what you’re doing until Alex grunts in your ear, “I’d stop wriggling unless you want me to fuck you in front of these lot.”
Your thighs press against each other and you pray Alex didn’t feel that too. Despite him definitely noticing, Alex didn’t say anything, didn’t tease you any more and you just about managed to have a conversation with Flo about how she’s joining her husband on his tour and how she’s going to stay in Sheffield for a while after to see her best friend. 
But it’s not long after that, the alcohol runs dry and everyone notices the time. Nick and Kirsten are the first to leave, followed by Katie and Jamie, and when you don’t move from Alex’s lap (because he won’t let you, his hands clutching you tightly after you tried to move when the first couple left. Clearly doesn’t think the bubbles will  hide his hard on) Flo and Miles are the last to get out. 
Miles gives you both a cheeky smile and he helps the artist out of the tub and hands her the dressing gown. Both of them say bye to you and Alex but Florence gives you a teasing look as she leaves, seeming to scream at the both of you, have funnn. 
Your jaw locks and you very subtly shake your head at her, trying your absolute best to keep the smile off your face and show your strength. And you’d say you do well, you shout an unbothered bye to the direction they went and only when you hear your bedroom door thud shut does Alex’s hold on you go slack. 
And finally you release the breath you were holding and grab the side of the tub to stand up, needing off this man's lap before you do something you’ll regret. Abandoning your empty prosecco glass you just get yourself stood up when the singer stops you. 
“Where are you going?” Alex gently grabs your wrist and pulls you back to him, the water sloshing as you fall back towards him. 
“Alex,” You sigh as he moves you so you’re straddling him, but before you can even protest his mouth finds yours. 
His kiss takes your breath away, and he doesn’t give you time to think. He just wants you to feel. 
Alex attacks you with long kisses, three of them that have you forgetting that you were even trying to get away. It’s as if something ignites in you both, the mere connection of your lips has your skin erupting in goosebumps, and they aren’t from the contrast with the hot water and the cold air. 
But you seem to get some perspective and much to Alex’s disappointment, you pull back from the kiss. But he doesn’t let you go far at all, his hand on the back of your neck keeps you close enough your foreheads are resting against each others. 
“It’s just a kiss.” Whispers the man who’s got your heart racing, his hand pulling your neck that bit closer hoping you’ll kiss him again. 
“It’s never just a kiss with you,” You breathlessly reply, gently shaking your head, your nose rubbing against his. 
When he pulls you back for another kiss you can’t deny yourself the simple pleasure. Because it is never just a kiss. 
And it isn’t, because you’re not sure what this one is laced with, but you’re addicted. You don’t want to stop for a single second, especially not when he grabs your hips with both hands and pulls you against him properly. 
Your back arches, your chest against his now and he can feel your peaked nipples through your bikini top. He can’t help but groan, he’s been wanting to feel them against him in some capacity since he saw them through your bikini top when he lifted you onto his lap and you got cold and his head filled with filth about you. 
About how he wanted to pinch them between his fingers so you’d make that noise he loves. About how he couldn’t stop thinking about his head being back between your thighs when he spotted the bruises he’d left there. About how he wanted nothing more than to tease you in front of his friends, to see how far he could push you out of your comfort zone. And after he could feel you throbbing on his thigh he wanted nothing more than to make you cum over and over again. 
This kiss turns hard and hungry and it takes you enough by surprise that if you were standing you’d have stumbled back with the force of it. As you’re on his lap though, you can’t escape and you don’t for a second want to. Alex’s hands move your hips so you start grinding on him and both of you moan at the friction. 
You hope that the rumble of the jets hides them from anyone other than the two of you, and you pray to every god that Katie and Jamie haven’t decided to go into their hot tub as they are the room beside yours. Despite the wooden panelling hiding the balconies completely from potential neighbours, you need to keep quiet. But it’s so difficult when he’s making you feel so good. 
The more you grind against him, the more you can feel your stomach tighten with need. The way Alex is dragging you against his cock just makes you worse, your clit finally getting the friction it’s been aching for.  
Minutes pass of your whining, gasping, and mewling as he encourages you, taking handfuls of your arse to pull you towards him as he bucks his hips up into yours. His moans motivate you more, your hips now erratic in search for relief as he kisses you. 
Alex licks into your mouth like he can’t get enough of the way you taste. His groans spur you on, and his hand moving up to the middle of your waist has you arching into his chest again, and he can’t help but move his hips in time with yours, loving the little whines that escape your pretty lips. 
But he needs to hear more, so when you tug on his hair, and he bucks up into you, he bites your bottom lip when you moan so he can muffle it with his own lips. He smirks when he pulls away and he grabs your face, his thumb and index finger pressing your cheeks together as he grinds you against him again, his fingers digging into your hip ensuring it. 
The moan you let out for him then, you can’t suppress, and by the way Alex’s eyes seem to sparkle with delight shows you just how satisfied the sound makes him. Like it was intent all along to have you be loud for him.
“Do I feel good, sweet?” His voice a low whisper that has your throat bobbing.  
The singer kisses his way up your jaw before biting your earlobe, and he clearly wants an answer, “Well?” His hand falling from your cheeks to your neck and the slightest pressure has your head in pieces. 
“Mmm.” You hum in agreement pulling back enough to grab his jaw and bring his lips back up to yours. 
You refuse to let him mark your neck up again, no matter how good his lips feel on your throat. And at this point you know he’d do it just to get the both of you caught to see if you could withstand your friends teasing. 
This between you carries on for longer than it should. But that pull, that spark, between you, now ignited neither of you can get enough. 
“You like knowing you get me this hard, just from seeing the bruises I left on your thighs?” Alex rasps, as he kisses slowly down your neck. 
At this point, you think you’d do just about anything to have his lips on you or on your skin somehow. It’s addicting. So much so that you don’t remember the silly rule that you agreed upon, especially when Alex moves his hand  
“From seeing these,” Alex hums against your neck as his thumbs circling both your nipples through your bikini. “I can still feel them on my chest from the other night.”
His lips trail down your neck and the top of your chest and he kisses over your skin and his hands grab at you that bit tighter as he says, “I want my mouth all over you, sweet.”
His thumbs hook into your bikini top and he pulls both cups to the side, leaving you bare for him. His lips are on your breast in a second and the other he kneads in his calloused hand. 
Your head falls back, a moan falling freely from your lips as you grind yourself onto his cock as he sucks your nipple. Needing as much friction as you can get because you could easily finish like this if he carried on. But god, you want him inside you instead. 
Picking your head up, your fingers tug in his hair encouraging him as his right hand now grabs your arse again making you move on him. Fuck, you could cum just from this, easily if he carries on. 
He swaps to your other tit, lapping at it and savouring the sweetness of your skin and he can’t help but moan when you rut against him again. God, he just wants to have you like this forever, just free of inhibitions and completely giving into your desire. 
“Well, sweet? You like knowing what you do to me?” He teases, but he takes it a step further and he reaches between you and he presses circles onto your clit through your clothes, “That I like feeling this greedy thing throbbing on my lap for me?”
The sound you let out is guttural and completely obscene. To mute it you harshly pull his hair so you can press your lips against his to quieten yourself. But fuck knows if he even helps. 
His sweet torture continues and you feel the tension forming in your lower stomach, flames scorching your limbs, all caused by the man who’s name falls from your lips in desparate pleas, “Alex.”
His kiss is hot and heavy like a man starved, like he could never get enough of you. His hands claiming you is something promise you’ll never deny yourself the pleasure of again, those magic fucking fingers have you seeing stars. Each swipe of them against your clothed clit pushes you closer towards that delightful edge. 
“I- Al, oh.” Fuck. You’re going to finish, this is it and it’s going to shatter you entirely. 
His warm hands on you, the feeling of his chest rising and falling against your own, his body heat making your nipples perk from the stimulation. And his fucking cock that you’re aching to have inside you, he’s so hard all you can think about is reaching down and moving your costume to the side so you can line him up and fill you to the br-
So consumed with your thoughts and your erratic hips chasing the orgasm you're on the verge of having you miss the singer mumble against your lips, “Okay, that’s enough.”  
You only register when Alex’s hand now holds your hip to stop you from moving and you hear him say, “Stop, sweet.”
“No,” You helplessly whine, entirely cockdrunk at this point, wanting him too badly and you kiss him deeply again. 
But Alex only entertains the kiss for another second, before he pulls away and to stop your lips from following his again, he holds your jaw, “If you keep kissing me, we’re not going to make it another minute.”
You’re so breathless you barely understand what he means. But as you take a minute to get some oxygen back into your system you realise what you’ve done and god you want to lock yourself up and throw away the key. 
“I’m sorry.” You swallow, looking away from his gaze. 
“Don’t apologise.” Alex shakes his head, and you note he’s just as out of breath as you. And he gently readjusts your bikini so it’s covering your modesty again as he says, “We agreed on your rule, sweet, don’t wanna break it on day one now, do we?”
It’s his smirk that he gives you as he says the end of that which makes you say, “You’re a bully.”
Because he’s got you all hot and bothered, only to completely edge you and use ‘your rule’ as an excuse to leave you right on the brink. God you could absolutely throttle him. But knowing Alex, he’d enjoy it, so you keep your hands to yourself. 
The singer just laughs, “You love it.” And he taps your arse under the water to prompt you to stand up so he can too. 
Jesus Christ it’s only now that you realise how perishing the cold is, you practically jump out of the tub and run for your dressing gown before heading to the door. And you’re kind enough to hold the door open for Alex as he wraps his towel around his shoulders. 
It’s only now that you gulp seeing just how little the swim shorts disguise his erection. Standing at attention is an understatement, and there’s a little spark of pride that scorches your blood knowing you’ve caused that. 
You don’t let your eyes linger, but you know from the smug smirk on his face as he walks through the door that he’s caught you looking. And the prick opens his mouth, probably to bully you once more but you beat him to it as you close and lock the balcony door. 
“You don’t care about the rule, why’d you stop when I was clearly enjoying myself?” You ask as you follow him to the door to your room. 
“Because you were dead set about not wanting to before we came.” Alex tells you sincerely, and you can’t help your heart from warming that little bit as he looks you in the eye and says, “I don’t want you regretting anything between us.” 
Swallowing down the smile you want to plaster all over your face, you tell him, “I don’t regret what just happened, for the record.”
“Good.” Alex smiles, walking the last few steps to your door. And the singer is about to open it before he pauses, turns back and tells you, “Oh, and don’t get yourself off.” 
Immediately you frown a little. It’s a miracle your words don’t come out as a scoff, “Don’t think you have that authority.” 
The smirk that comes to those pretty swollen lips and the way his eyes darken is something that needs capturing in a museum. Fucking hell it’s definitely banked away in a certain area of your mind. 
“I could just fuck you now if you’re going to do that.” Alex raises his eyebrows, and you can tell he’so putting the offer out there. 
But after him saying it’s only day one, you’re definitely not giving in now. A week without fucking him. You can do it. You just can’t fucking slip up again. How embarrassing of you to have given in to your temptations only mere hours after your holiday began. 
Alex seems to understand your thoughts entirely so he quickly saves himself from a scolding,  “Think of it as being edged instead, don’t touch yourself. It’ll make next week more fun.”
Your still fucking throbbing for him, aching isn’t even the right word for the need for relief you’re feeling. It looks like your bullet won’t be being used while you’re away after all. But if you’re showing restraint, you certainly won’t be the only one. 
You nod, the corner of your lips tugging up a little seeing Alex smile down at you and as he reaches from the door handle to let himself out, you surprise him by saying, “Don’t touch yourself either then.” 
He looks at you again, his eyes entirely full of surprise that you’ve given him an order. But he’ll do it for you. He won’t be a double standard, so he agrees.  
Although when he opens the door and takes a step out, and you tell him, “Go get a cold shower.” He loves your brattiness.  
“Could share one of those?” Alex offers as he takes a step back towards you, his eyes bright and full of mischief as he smirks down at you. 
All you can think is, And end up having a repeat of the first time you were in the shower with him? No chance. 
“See you tomorrow, Alex.” You smile, placing a hand on his bare chest and pushing him towards the door perpendicular to yours. 
Alex chuckles, blowing you a teasing kiss, “Goodnight, sweet.”
~*~*~*~ January 4th 2019 ~*~*~*~
To say that the next couple of days were positively torturous would be a massive understatement. The cold shower you had after Alex left your room that first night didn’t do much to calm you down, the ache between your thighs didn’t disappear until well into the night of you tossing and turning in bed. 
At one point you were ready to march into his room and tell him how unfair it is to leave you on edge like that, and that it was unfair because you’d be so pent up that you’d have a miserable holiday. But then you’d realise you’d see the singer's smug smirk and he’d say something along the lines of, ‘You’re so greedy that you come begging me to get you off, is that it? You can’t go even a few hours without me, can you not? You poor sweet thing.’ 
So you chose to stay warm in bed, following his direction of not getting yourself off and you eventually fall asleep. You swear though that if he got himself off and didn’t stick through this with you, you’d be absolutely fuming. 
And you can’t help but be pleased when Alex eventually joins you all for breakfast the next morning, and he made a thunderstorm look appealing. ‘In a mood’ would be an understatement. The singer looked like he hadn’t slept a wink, he hadn't even bothered with his hair, it was still dishevelled, and his glum, tired face had a smile tugging on your lips.
Good. You like knowing you’re not the only one who felt absolutely tortured.    
You had to hide your smirk by taking a drink of your orange juice, sipping it through the straw as your eyes linger on the singer who looks like he could commit a murder if his breakfast was served wrong. Clearly though, you’re not being as slick as you thought you were hiding your amusement by taking a drink because when Alex’s eyes lock with yours he sees the knowing in them. 
Instead of shying away from him though, you stare straight into his eyes and let your smirk show when you pull your drink out. You even raise your eyebrows at him entirely enthralled that he looks so much worse than you this morning. Looks like it’ll be cold showers for him for the foreseeable future.  
Alex couldn’t help but find you equally as amusing that morning at breakfast. The smile stayed on your face for the entirety of your meal and he could tell that seeing him so affected by the lack of your company had somehow boosted your confidence. So, pent up he may be, but he’d suffer in silence for as long as he needed to see that smug look on your face once more.  
Alex made sure his teasing continued throughout that day and the next. His flirting and lingering looks had you more on edge than usual thanks to the fact you felt entirely touch-starved, but you couldn’t deny that he had your heart racing. 
On the slopes he would sometimes wait for you if he wasn’t racing the boys or Flo down the mountain, to make sure you got down alright and there would be flirting when you’d stopped at the cafe’s that were half way down the slope. And he had you buy him the promised drinks that made you come on this holiday in the first place so you were happy keeping your end of that bargain. 
He really made you smile today when you had a bit of a fall on the slope. He watched you fall but he stopped right beside you and made sure you were okay before getting you back to your feet and he went down the slope as by your side as he could get. And when you both reached the bottom, he played into checking you over, being cheeky and saying he’d have to get the layers off you to make a complete and thorough check. Something which of course you rolled your eyes at but you couldn’t keep the smile from your face. 
When you walked out of your room each night dressed to go for dinner he told you how gorgeous you looked in your dress when he saw you, whether that be him stepping out of his room at the same time coincidentally or when you walked down with Katie and he was waiting for you with the other lads. Tonight was the latter and the way he looked you up and down made you feel all tingly inside.
And this evening at dinner he sat beside you and when you were waiting between courses, Alex rested his hand on your thigh, and it wasn’t at all to try and rile you, he seemed to just want to be affectionate. And Flo is right, why would you deny yourself that pleasure. 
You know you’re nowhere near a relationship, or possibly even heading into that direction. But this fun you’re having with him, it doesn’t mean you can’t take comfort from the small meaningful gestures that you’ve found that you’ve missed since your last relationship. 
So yes, you’ve adored the flirting, and matched his energy entirely by giving him back as much as good as you’ve got which grants you access to that cheeky smirk you’re starting to love being the cause of. You pretend like your heart doesn’t do something stupid when he’s affectionate and you’ll continue to act like you aren’t dying for him to touch you and kiss you and fuck you until you’re back home. 
And all of this is the reason why right now, you’re absolutely seething at yourself. Why you’re now at this bar, side-eyeing the man who’s had you at whit's end for the past few days wanting god to do you a favour and stop what you’re seeing. 
You hate it, you absolutely hate it. Seeing Alex’s hand on her hip, the way he smiles at her as she’s talking, and the way he’s making this random girl laugh. 
It’s been at least 15 minutes now since he went up to the bar to get himself another drink and left your group at the few standing tables in the corner which you’d all claimed. And when you looked over after 5 minutes of him disappearing, you saw him at the bar talking away with possibly the most gorgeous woman you’d ever seen. 
Intimidated isn’t even the word you could use to compare yourself to the stunning woman. She’s just everything you’re not. Clearly she's confident to speak to a stranger normally and not at 100 miles per hour because she’s nervous. She’s absolutely gorgeous with the complete opposite hair colour and style to yours, and her dress accentuates all of her features perfectly, leaving little to everyone’s imagination but she’s so gorgeous and fearlessly self assured, there’s no way you could possibly compete with a woman like her. 
Your chest sinks because it’s so easy for you to realise just how jealous of this woman you are. Not just because she holds Alex’s attention and you want that back for yourself, you’re just hit with that intimidatingly jealous feeling you’ve not experienced for such a long time. And it’s such a dirty feeling, you really judge yourself for it. 
Because you’re well aware you’re not in a relationship with the singer. Yes you’re fucking each other but he could easily call that off at any point, especially on holiday when you’ve established you’re not sleeping with each other and that will make your self esteem plummet and not to be dramatic but you’ll more than likely never put yourself out there again, and you think that is valid enough if that’s how this night ended.   
To make it worse, the ladies you’re with, your close friends can clearly see that you’re slipping into a foul mood. A few times you’ve been asked what’s wrong, and you’d have to tune back into conversations and plaster a fake smile on your face because you’ve got so stupidly in your head about all of this. 
It was only when Katie followed your gaze to the bar did she realise what was making you slip into a bad mood. On the down low, when Kirsten and Flo were having their own conversation, Katie said, “Y/N/N?” 
“Hmm?” You hum, tearing your eyes away from a laughing Alex and the stunning woman.  
You look at your best friend as she seriously asks, “What are you waiting for?” 
Immediately, you’re confused, “What?” 
Katie can’t help but laugh to herself a little as you’re being so blatantly obvious to her. And she can’t lie, she secretly loves seeing you jealous, because she’s never witnessed it before. And the mere fact you’re being silently possessive over Alex is all the more amusing to her. 
“Just go and get him.” She encourages you, seeing that you’re holding your glass of wine that little bit too tight.  
She understands that you’re probably that bit more jealous too because you are bordering on being a little bit drunk. Your tolerance is slightly better than hers and she knows that you’ve drank near enough the same amount so she’s very aware how your thoughts are probably being manipulated by the alcohol. 
“No, if he wants to play he can,” You tell her and put on a brave face, turning away from him now in an attempt to not shoot daggers at him with your eyes, “He just won’t be getting me again afterwards.”
And you mean it. You won’t get caught up in that STD mess waiting to happen. Condoms or not. It’s a no from you. 
You drink with the girls a bit more then, the other lads make you laugh too but after a few minutes you become all too aware again that there’s a missing piece. And it’s like a wound to the chest when you see he’s still there talking to that woman and they seem to be standing that little bit closer, smiles still on both of their faces. 
Something about it hurts, and not due to the fact he’s being flirted with. It mostly gets to you because he’s being so kind to someone he’s just met and you only got that side of him after a ten years and only when you called him out for his behaviour. It makes your heart sink a little, you just don’t know why he wasn’t ever this friendly toward you when you were first introduced, yet he can be so kind, smiley, and flirty to a complete stranger. 
Up until 6 months ago, Alex would barely hold a conversation with you and something about that always hurt. The effort you’d make only for it to go unreciprocated when he probably knew how much it took for you to not be socially awkward around him. It’s a blow to your chest and to your ego. 
And to make it worst, he’s flirting with this girl as if you haven’t been fucking each other for a month and he didn’t almost fuck you in the hot tub the other night. As if the bruises he left on your thighs aren’t still very prominent and he didn’t edge you, leaving you craving every little bit of him for the last two days. And now he’s flirting with someone that isn’t you. 
And you can’t even blame the woman for flirting with him. He looks impeccable this evening. He’s in a black suit with a black shirt and he looks incredible. Like you’d do just about anything for him to pull you aside in this darkened bar and for him to whisper filthy promises in your ear before his lips find yours and he takes your breath away all over again. 
But you’re not so lucky. And your mood worsens when you see the bartender come back with two drinks in his hands and he places them in front of the pair. But it’s when Alex gets his card out and seemingly pays for both does your heart drop. 
Has he just fucking bought her a drink?
You blink a few times and force yourself to look away. The feeling that’s settled in your stomach not being one that you want to ever be feeling. Jealousy is such an ugly emotion and you wish it wasn’t running through your veins right now so you try and breath through it, letting the thoughts pass you by as quickly as they come.  
The people that know you best though, can see you’ve sort of checked out from the conversations surrounding you, and you’re staring out of the window at the snow that’s beginning to gently fall. Your best friend knows it’s not the same zoned out as you were awestruck when you first arrived on this holiday though, it’s due to you being in your head because of the man at the bar. 
And it seems Katie isn’t the only one, because Flo asks Mrs Cook quietly, “Should I go tell him?”
Katie notes that she nods over towards the bar, but your best friend immediately shakes her head.  
“No,” She tells her, “Let him dig his own grave.”
Because after everything last year, she wants Alex to prove himself worthy of having her best friend. She knows you deserve something good, and despite being 99% sure that Alex is just being polite to a fan at the bar, she wants him to prove that he wouldn’t ruin this good thing that you both have going for the sake of another woman who could pass as a model.  
So Katie distracts you, getting another glass of wine down you is easy to do and she has you giggling with her and Flo again. 
While you adore your friends for their distraction tactics, Alex and the stunning woman linger in your mind, and you feel like you need a second to quieten those intrusive thoughts. So you head to the toilet in hopes to clear your head but when you hold the sink and look at your reflection the clarity that hits you is that you’re drunk and probably (most definitely) overreacting, and you just find yourself wanting to close your eyes. 
So that’s why when you make your way back to your friends, who Alex is still not with, you decide your night is done. 
“Guys, I’m going to head back.” You tell all of them, “The wine has gone to my head and I’m so tired after today.”
Each and every one of their faces fall and they all start a little bit of a commotion, shaking their heads and shout over each other drunkenly pleading with you not to go. But it’s a singer who is the one that complains the loudest. 
“Noooo come on, Y/N/N.” Miles throws an arm around your shoulder, pulling you into him as he says, “Party with us.”
You smile at him but there’s no way you’ll be giving in. You need your bed. And to get away from Alex and the stunning woman taking all of his attention at the bar. 
“Miles, you saw the fall I had earlier today,” You almost wince at the memory, “I’m knackered and just wanna get in bed so I’m good again tomorrow.”
“I’ll walk you back.” Jamie offers but immediately you shake your head, having none of it. 
“No, you’re having a great time, stay out. Have fun.” You smile, giving him a look to say ‘do not put on your coat’ as you put on your own. 
You’ll be perfectly fine getting back by yourself, everywhere is lit well enough to make the 5 minute walk back feel safe. And you could certainly use the time to clear your head. 
So you just smirk, wrapping your coat around you and downing the last of your white wine. And you grin, “I'll see you all hungover for breakfast in the morning.”
They all laugh at your little joke, knowing it’ll more than likely come to fruition, before they pull you into hugs goodbye. Flo, you realise, gives the best hugs out in the group, and she holds you tightly as she whispers in your ear, “Are you sure?”
You don’t hesitate to nod, “Positive.” 
She pouts a little as you pull away from the hug but you give her a kiss on the cheek and tell her to have another drink for you which makes her giggle and she promises she will. And then the only person left over here you have to hug is your very drunk best friend, and Katie all but smothers you with her bear hug. 
God you adore your best friend so much. Or you do until she easily reads between the lines and questions your actions. 
“This isn’t to do with Alex, is it?” She asks, pouting like she’s both angry and upset, “Because you can’t let him spoil your fun.”
You hate that she knows you so well, but wanting to go back to your hotel room is only marginally to do with Alex at this point. You know if you drank anymore tonight you’d be worse for wear tomorrow and you don’t want to ruin this precious holiday by staying in your room wanting to throw up. 
“No, I'm just tired.” You lie, trying not to even think about the fact that Alex not really giving you any attention and flirting with another girl was what triggered your bad mood in the first place. You tell her, “I just wanna get some sleep.”
“Okay queen.” Katie nods before she pulls back and she looks into your eyes to seriously tell you, “Text me as soon as you get back to the hotel, okay?”
“I will.” You promise her and after she gives you another hug, you turn to leave. 
You avoid looking anywhere near the bar even though you have to pass it to leave, but you’re quick and you leave out of the side doors and make it down the stairs fairly quickly. The automatic doors expose you to the cold air quickly and you’re so thankful you chose your long, navy dress this evening, even if you were regretting the slit in it that comes up to just above your knee when the wind hits you.  
Thankfully, your ‘going out coat’ is a long one, coming down to just past your knees, and would retain most of your body heat, so as you walk towards the doors you start to slowly button it up. But your buttons aren’t cooperating, they won't go through the bloody buttonhole. Clearly nothing wants to go right for you this evening.
And you end up not paying attention to where you’re going as you walk out of the bar, you don’t realise that the smoking areas out front has gotten busier so you end up turning to head back to your hotel and you bump into someone at quite a little bit of force. Immediately, you end up almost slipping too, not realising that the ground has become slippy too thanks to the fresh snow landing and melting. But before you fall arse over tit, you're saved by your own victim. The poor man you bumped into.  
“Oh god, I’m so sorry.” You say as you grab onto his tattooed arm that stabled you. 
And it’s only when you’re sure you’re steady on your feet do you look at the exquisite man. A gasp almost leaves your mouth at just how attractive he is. The strong jawline, the short black hair, the sun kissed skin, and possibly the most stunning eyes you’ve ever seen in your entire life. They are such a gorgeous shade of blue they almost look purple, and God, you half wish you could stare into them all night.  
“No worries,” The man holding your arm says, and once he’s satisfied you can stand properly again, his eyes drop to take you in. 
It makes you feel like your heart is in your throat for the two seconds he checks you out, but under the stare of those gorgeous eyes, it feels like it lasts an age. You can’t help watching as a small smirk forms on his lips, clearly pleased with what he sees and when his eyes meet yours again, you feel like your knees could fall from under you again if he wasn’t still holding you up. He’s dream worthy.
His fingers move down your wrist and he gently comes to squeeze your hand as he smirks but endearingly says, “Careful darling.” 
Immediately, the pet name makes you flush, and under his gaze you feel like you’re vibrating somehow, and you realise just how badly you need to get yourself back to your hotel. So to not make a fool out of yourself again, you cut the situation short.
“Thank you.” You give him a gracious smile and a small nod of your head before turning towards your hotel and safely begin to rush off. 
In your peripherals, you see the two other men that the stunning man was accompanied by and you’re glad you didn’t interact with them too, because they look just as attractive as their friend. You’d surely crumble under their gazes and start awkwardly chatting their ears off so you’re pleased to get away from both them and that bar. 
At least this gives your drunk mind a quick distraction from wondering what Alex and that girl are currently up to. You try not to think about how cosy they might have got or if either of them have made a move. No, you’d rather think about your embarrassing encounter with a model worthy guy who then checked you out and you said thank you to him. 
Thank you? God, you’re so fucking stupid for saying thank you Y/N/N, that doesn’t even make sense. Thank you for me bumping into you and being so kind about it? What was the thank you for? Silly bitch. 
God you really need to get to sleep. Your brain is absolutely spinning. 
Instead you find yourself focussing on the crunch of snow under your boots, how you can see your breath in front of you. And the gentle light coming from the lampposts illuminates the snow that’s slowly falling from the sky and you can’t help but think that it’s so beautiful despite it being so cold. 
Finally you manage to do up the buttons of your coat and your hands are stuffed in your pockets as you carry on walking. But it’s only a few seconds later, you hear your name being shouted behind you. You think you’re hearing things so you don’t stop walking, but then you hear someone running behind you and a gentle call of, “Sweet.” As he begins to slow down. 
Alex is out of breath by the time he’s beside you, and a gentle hand on your arm stops you from walking. A mixture of emotions runs through you in that moment, happy that he’s not with that girl anymore is certainly one of them, but annoyance at him for him even flirting with someone else hits you all over again. 
And it just makes your mood worse, because you absolutely despise being jealous. You hate it. You hate the tightness in your chest and you hate the way you start to second guess everything. And you don’t think you should be second guessing if you’re good enough.  
But you keep all of that to yourself, not wanting to annoy Alex or appear jealous or be overbearing. You’re just drunk and you need to get over yourself. 
“Sweet.” Alex says a little out of breath, “What’s wrong?”
“Absolutely nothing.” You say more flatly than you meant to and turn to carry on walking to the hotel. 
You’d scorn yourself for it, but you’re glad Alex doesn’t pick up on your tone. He just follows after you, falling into step as he asks, “Why are you leaving so early?”
“It’s almost one Alex,” You tell him, “I’m tired.”
You’re certainly not telling him that he’s a part of the reason you’re leaving. Even if he has finally given someone else the time of day for a brief minute tonight.  
Trying not to focus on the mixed emotions cursing through you, you end up telling the singer, “You don’t have to walk me back, go back to the bar.”
“And let you walk back on your own at one in the morning?” Alex frowns down at you,  “I don’t think so.”
You shake your head slightly at that, knowing he’s just doing that because of the story you told him about how you don’t like to walk alone at night. But you don’t want him here solely because of that. “I don’t need your pity.”
“There’s no pity, I’m just not a dickhead, sweet.” Alex’s smile then turns into a smirk as he throws his arm around your shoulders and he pulls you against him, “Now let me keep you warm.”
Your chest feels lighter somehow at his actions, and it makes you feel all gooey and smiley inside. But your brain is telling you to keep a hard exterior after what you witnessed tonight, so you try and brush him off, “Al, I’m fine.”
But the singer is having none of it. He just holds you tighter teases, “You’re moody.” 
“I’m tired.” You correct him, even though you’re lying through your teeth. 
“With your little rule, I thought you would have been reserving more energy.” Alex smirks, not being able to pass on the opportunity to torture you that little bit more. 
You don’t mute your scoff at that, and decide that silence is what he deserves after that comment and him flirting with someone else all evening. And it hits you all over again how up until a few months ago you’d only get silence and sneers from him, but that woman at the bar instantly got smiles and flirting. It makes you want to push his arm off your shoulder and you fall silent again. 
It’s confusing. Wanting to scold him but then also lean into him and accept the joy the simple pleasure of him hugging you brings you. And you’re feeling it all at once. You don’t understand it and don’t really know how to process it. 
Sleep. You need sleep. 
With his free hand, Alex digs into his coat pocket and pulls out his gloves, noticing you’re shivering, “Here take these.” 
“Thank you.” You accept them quietly and graciously and don’t waste much time putting them on, even if they are too big for you. 
Alex smiles once you have them on, and he squeezes your shoulder that bit tighter as he grins, “They suit you.” 
“Bit big, but I'll take it.” You shrug a little, and give him a bit of a smile so you don’t look like a colossal bitch. It was a kind gesture after all. 
Alex grins back down, his eyes bright as he says with a knowing look, “Well, you know what they say about big hands, sweet.”
Holding your own smile back, you fake a roll of your eyes and look away from him, “You’re not funny.”
“What?” Alex asks, faking innocence but smirking, “Just big gloves, nothing untoward.” 
You share an amused look then, both looking into each other's eyes and knowing for certain that was not what he was meaning. In those few seconds though, you can’t help but notice how gorgeous he looks, with the snow falling down around him, a few flakes having found home in his hair and he just looks so pretty and happy. 
You always want to look at him and see that cheeky smile looking back down at you. It makes you feel all warm inside.  
But then that crude sense of humour has to go and ruin the moment. 
“Anyway,” He smirks, “You already know how big I am. I don't think I need to remind you just yet.”
The way your cheeks heat up immediately is almost as embarrassing as the way your gaze snaps away from his. You just try to act nonchalant about it, shaking your head, “Way to lower the tone.”
“I think it was your dirty mind that lowered the tone, sweet.” Alex laughs and he has you giggling along with him. 
It doesn’t take long to get back to the hotel, and you walk in a comfortable silence with your head finally not filled with everything to do with the bar. You just enjoy having his attention back, and that he keeps pulling you back into him, and rubbing the top of your arm in an effort to keep you warm. 
You expect the singer to walk you into the lobby and bid you goodnight there before he heads back out to your other friends. But he surprises you, stepping into the lift with you and even when you’re going up to your floor he keeps his arm around you like he doesn’t want to let you go.  
“Thank you for walking me back, you really didn’t have to.” You tell him after he walks you to your door and you get your keycard out of your pocket. 
Only when you look at him again does he tell you, “Stop thanking me for being a decent human being.”
You smile at him for a second there, and it is a truly grateful one. Despite everything tonight, you really are thankful he came back with you. If not for your safety, but then at least for your peace of mind about what he was up to when you left. Your chest fills with the hatred of the jealousy you’re feeling once more. 
But it’s like the man looking at you can somehow read your emotions. Because he once again flips them on their head when he takes you in again and sees how gorgeous you look in that navy dress and the way it hugs you. 
He seems a little breathless as he says, “You really do look incredible tonight by the way.” 
You look down at yourself, really not thinking you looked anything more than presentable tonight. But two men have checked you out this evening and seemed pleased with what they saw, and you know Alex well enough now to know that he doesn’t just say these things, he actually means them. 
“I- Thank you.” You stumble for a second, but gladly take the compliment. 
As you turn to open your door, Alex takes a step towards his, which makes you frown. He’s going to bed?
“You can go back out, you know?” You say before he even takes another step. 
You don’t really understand why he’d be going to his room when he could go back out and have a good time with either your friends or the stunning woman he was chatting to. Surely he didn’t just leave because you did?
Alex shrugs, and takes a step back towards you, “Don’t want to.”
“Why?” You can’t help but question, “Looked like you were having a good time.”
“Not that good, I wasn’t spending it with you.” Alex shamelessly flirts as he comes to stand right beside you again, hoping to see you get all flustered. 
He adores being the cause of it, and he even likes when you run your mouth back at him and flirt with him too. It makes him happier than he should admit to himself at this point in your little arrangement. But you shock him completely and don’t do either of those things.
No, instead Alex watches as you tense slightly and you become ridged. The smile falling from your face entirely. 
“You knew where I was.” You shrug, not knowing what more you could have done. It’s not like you could go up to him and demand his attention, or steal him away and he figures out why and he teases you for it.  
You just turn back towards your door and mumble under your breath as you put the card in, “Besides, it seems that you found her quite interesting.” 
This has Alex smirking, possibly the biggest he ever has. Not that you can see that smirk as you’re still fumbling about with your keycard and putting it in the door the wrong way. So it gives him a little time to compose himself enough that you won’t hate him when he gets you to look at him again. 
You’re jealous. Hence the mood, short replies, and the pout that was just seeping onto your face… It all makes perfect sense now. 
Alex tones his smirk down into a slight grin before he get your attention again, “Sweet?” 
“What?” You ask, just about managing to open your door before you turn back to him. 
And it’s only when you do, you see the way he’s looking at you. His amusement is clear to see, but he doesn’t say anything. He just takes a step close to you, and before you really know it his lips are on yours and he gently eases you backwards until your back is against the heavy door you’ve not opened more than an inch. 
It’s a sweet kiss, full of longing and care and words you’ve both yet to say. And the way he gently holds your waist, pulling you against him now, his arm running inside your coat and around your back so he can press you fully against him as his lips move in sync with yours. His hand on your jaw moves that bit higher, so his thumb can caress your cheek and you think this might be the sweetest kiss you’ve ever shared.
It’s gentle and full of emotion, even when his tongue finds home with yours. It makes the both of you hot despite both of your lips softly moving together. Something about it runs deeper, like he’s trying to tell you something without explicitly coming out with it. 
His hold on your waist gets that bit tighter which has you melting into him. Unable to stop yourself, you also let out a tiny hum of bliss against his lips and you hold his coat in your fist that bit tighter. This is what you’ve been after all night. This is what you’ve been craving. Him and every last bit of him. 
Even when the kiss comes to its natural end, you wish it wasn’t finished. And you’re glad that it doesn’t seem to be. But the man who makes your heart skip a beat says something you really aren’t expecting. 
“I’m only interested in sleeping with you.” Alex tells you, before he leaves you with one last breathless kiss. 
~*~*~*~*~*~
A/N: What did you think?!?!? NRIACC bestiesssss!! How was it seeing Wheels again?! She's my multiverse I had to hahaha! But how bloody cute are Sweet and Alex, god I adore them so so much. Until next time besties x
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hellcat8908 · 5 months
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rhys x reader who act like enemies in the nightcourt and banger and argue all the time infron of their parents but are secretly mated. Reader is the daughter of the high lords most trusted advisor, so they were tutored together and raised together. They act like they don’t love eachother bc love is shown as weakness in the nc and they would get separated/ she would he sent of to marry someone else. The second the high lord dies and rhys becomes HL he can finally stop the act and everyone are confused but they can’t say anything bc he’s the HL now. Even cassian mor and azriel thought they didn’t like eachother.
My Enemy Rhysand x Reader
You had grown up with Rhys in the Court of Nighmares. You originally hadn't liked each other at all, but once you were older, that quickly changed. You knew your relationship had to remain a secret. You both continued the facade that you couldn't stand each other. You always bickered and badgered each other in front of everyone.
You had always hated hiding your relationship with Rhys. You knew it was for the best, but you still hated that you weren't able to be who you were with him. You cherished the stolen kisses and moments where you were just a couple in love. Rhys kept promising you that once he became high lord, things would change. You promised him to be patient and wait because he was worth it.
Unfortunately, you weren't sure you could stall your father's plans much longer. A marriage had been arranged between you and another court members son. You had broken the news to Rhys shortly before he left for Windhaven. "I will do everything I can to fix this." Rhys told you, giving you hope that he would find a way. Even though you weren't sure how he'd do it.
You patiently waited for Rhys, while your father was quickly running out of patience with you and your stalling. Finally, he had enough and decided you'd be married in three days, no excuses. At the news, you had locked yourself in your bedroom and pleaded with the cauldron to let Rhys put a stop to this.
Over the next two days, you were fitted with a simple wedding gown as the other arrangements were made. After all the delays, your father didn't want to put a lot of time or funding into your wedding. You had refused to be seen by anyone and had refused to eat. Every night, you looked at the stars and wished for Rhys to come home.
Your nerves were getting the best of you as you stood in your wedding dress. You were about to walk down the aisle to marry the wrong man. The music started, and the doors opened, revealing everyone and standing at the altar was your groom to be. You forcefully willed yourself to walk down the aisle towards the wrong future.
You make it down the aisle before the priestess starts the ceremony. The whole time, your mind is screaming how wrong this is. It comes time for the vows, and you listen as your groom says his, then the priestess looks to you expectantly. Your mouth opens, but you can't find the will to say the words. Your father gives you a threatening look. You start fumbling over the words.
You jump as the doors slam open, revealing Rhys and his inner circle. You can't help the smile that spreads as you watch him walking down the aisle towards you. "Sorry I'm late, but this wedding is officially finished, and the marriage is off." He announces. "Just who do you think you are?" You're dad shouts as he storms over. "I am the new High Lord, and y/n is to be my High Lady." He declares like it's the most natural thing.
Your father stares in shock at Rhys' declaration. "Shall we, Darling?" He asks as he holds out his elbow for you to take. "We shall." You say with a genuine smile as he escorts you out, followed by the inner circle. "Where are we going?" You ask as he leads you out of the chapel. "Home." He says, winnowing you to the house of wind.
Once you're inside, you can't help but wrap your arms around him and kiss him. "I always thought they hated each other." Mor says. "So did we." Cassian responds. "Clearly, it was all an act. It was a very convincing act." Azriel says. "Sorry we hid our relationship from you." You tell them. "We couldn't risk anyone finding out about us until the time was right." Rhys adds.
"We understood why you did it." Mor says. "I would've done the same thing if I were you." She adds. "So does that mean you're not going to badger each other anymore? Because y/n was great at putting you in your place." Cassian says with a smile. "Careful Cass, she might start putting you in your place." Azriel teases. "Finally! Another girl, now I'm not stuck with the three of you." Mor says.
Rhys wraps an arm around you and gives you a tour of the house. The rest of the day is spent getting to know the rest of the inner circle and relaxing. After dinner, you excuse yourself and step outside for a few minutes. "Are you alright?" Rhys asks as he stands beside you. You lean against him, causing him to tuck you under his arm.
"I can't believe we're finally free." You tell him as your eyes water. "I told you this day would come." He says teasingly, "I'm sorry you had to wait this long for it." He says. "You're always worth the wait, Love." You reply. He kisses you, pulling you into him as his fingers tangle in your hair. You kiss him back without fear of getting caught or having to make it quick, and you savor the first real kiss between the two of you. "Welcome home, Darling." Rhys says once you break the kiss. "There's nowhere else I'd rather be." You tell him.
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misc-obeyme · 6 months
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SFW prompt #9 with Lucifer? (If it isn't taken that is)
Hello!
It was not taken, so you're good! Ahh Lucifer! I used to be so obsessed with him, then I hated his guts, and now I love him again, but I just want him to chill out and take a break for once. I tend to have this thing with characters that work a lot where I want them to just... stop. And relax. And Lucifer is one of those lol.
Anyway, thank you for participating!
1,000 Followers Event!
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GN!MC x Lucifer with prompt "You know me so well."
Warnings: none!
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It had been a week of chaos. You watched as Lucifer tried to handle every problem that was thrown his way. And you couldn't deny that he did a good job of dealing with everything while still maintaining his usual composure. And yet you could tell how tired he was, too. You knew him well enough to see it in the lines by his eyes, the way he sometimes sighed quietly when he thought no one could hear him.
In the evenings, you always found him in his office. He didn't have any time to be anywhere else, slumped over piles of paperwork that only ever seemed to grow larger.
And so you decided to take it upon yourself to give Lucifer a night of relaxation.
The first thing you did was go to the Demon Lord's Castle to consult with Diavolo and Barbatos about getting a nice bottle of Demonus. They were immediately on board, giving you several bottles, all of which were of the finest quality and hand picked from Diavolo's own stores. Barbatos also gave you some of Lucifer's favorite foods.
After this, you went to Solomon because you knew he had obtained a rare cursed record recently. The only thing he asked for in exchange was that you put in a good word for him with Lucifer, a suggestion that making a pact with him would be beneficial to them both.
You set everything up in the music room. You had the Demonus and the food on the table, two full glasses beside a silver platter. You already put the record on the gramophone, but you hadn't started playing it yet.
Then you sat down, smoothed out your clothes, and pulled out your D.D.D. You sent Lucifer a text asking him to meet you in the music room. You tried to make it sound like it was a problem, like something had gone wrong and you needed his help right away.
Lucifer responded saying he would be with you shortly.
You waited. You fiddled with your fingers a little bit as you did. You knew that Lucifer had a lot to do, but he really needed to take a break after this hectic week. You were hoping that he would come here and relax with you at least for a little while.
When he finally showed up, Lucifer came into the room with his usual stoic expression, his eyebrows drawn as though he was prepared to deal with another mess.
"All right, MC," he said. "I'm here. What is-"
He cut off when he finally saw you, sitting there on the sofa next to the Demonus and food.
You stood up and moved closer to him. "I know you've had to put out a lot of fires this week," you said. "And you've been staying up all night to finish paperwork again. So I wanted you to come here and take a break with me. I have some special rare Demonus, a selection of foods including your favorite poison apples, and I found a new cursed record that we can listen to. I checked and it's safe for a human like me to hear it."
Lucifer stared at you for several moments before he finally smiled. It wasn't a smirk, either, but a genuine smile and you watched as his entire body seemed to relax. He came over to you, putting a hand on your cheek.
Lucifer chuckled. "You know me so well."
You smiled back at him, pleased with the way he seemed to be ready to join you, the way he was looking at you so fondly, as if this was the best gift he ever could have received.
You gestured for him to sit down on the sofa while you started the record. The room was filled with the soft sounds of classical music played by violins as you sat beside him. You picked up the glasses of Demonus and handed one over to him.
"Shall we make a toast?" Lucifer asked.
You raised your glass. "To a night off!"
Lucifer laughed softly, leaned forward, and said quietly, "To us."
Then he clinked his glass against yours and took a sip, his eyes never leaving yours.
You blushed, but sipped at your own glass. Even though Demonus had no effect on you, it still tasted good and this particular vintage had been one of Diavolo's finest.
Lucifer clearly appreciated it, picking up the bottle to read the label. "How did you get a Demonus of this quality?"
You shrugged. "I had some help. I'm not the only one who would like you to take a break more often."
Lucifer put the bottle back down. He had a knowing expression on his face, but nobody needed to say Diavolo's name.
Lucifer moved closer to you, putting an arm around your shoulders and pulling you close to him. You could feel his body moving gently with his breath. You heard the soft shh of fabric as he lifted his arm to sip from his glass, a soft sound that you were close enough to hear even with the melancholic strains of violins that filled the room.
After some time, Lucifer put down his empty glass. You set yours beside his, also empty. The record wasn't finished yet, but you knew he might leave anyway. No doubt he still had plenty of work to do, even if you only wanted him to stay here beside you.
"This has been a very pleasant evening, MC," Lucifer said, turning you slightly so you were looking at him. "I truly appreciate the lengths you have gone to. But you must know that all I need is you."
You blushed and looked away from his intense gaze, his ruby eyes almost aflame with a desire you couldn't face. "I know. But I wanted to do something extra for you. You deserve it after everything you've been through this past week."
Lucifer's arm tightened around you, his other arm coming up to wrap around your waist, pulling you closer to him in a way that forced you to look at him again. The minute you did, he was kissing you, his touch soft yet firm. You responded by returning his embrace, one hand resting on his chest, feeling the rhythm of his heart as it sped up significantly.
The music from the gramophone swelled, the violins increasing in volume and fervor at that exact moment, as if somehow the composer had known that it would be the soundtrack to this intimate moment between you. It filled you with a heady dizziness that you never got from drinking Demonus.
Lucifer pulled away for a moment, pressing his forehead to yours, the vulnerability in his eyes unlike anything you had ever seen from him before. "How have you come to mean so much to me? I can hardly control myself when I'm with you."
You drew in a breath. "You've spent so much time looking after everyone else, Lucifer. You just needed someone to look after you for once."
Lucifer shut his eyes, as if the truth of your words had sunk into his soul, a reality he hadn't been prepared to acknowledge. Then he kissed you again, pulling you in even more, like he needed to feel you as much as possible. You never thought of Lucifer as being afraid, but in that moment you thought perhaps he was scared to let you go.
You wrapped your arms around his neck, your own embrace just as needy. What had begun as a simple kiss deepened, your mouth falling open for him, your body moving against him.
Lucifer was rarely so open with you, but tonight you had seen in him how much he needed you. How much he cherished you. How he wanted to keep you by his side and never let you go. As you shared that passionate kiss, you could feel it burning through you, a spark that ignited your skin with his touch.
And in the background, the violins sang.
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1,000 Followers Event | masterlist | Thank you for reading!
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Text
Committed to Hell
Yandere Male Demon x Gender Neutral Reader (CW: Noncon, drugging, religious themes/imagery, reader dies but the story takes place in their afterlife, murder, blood, cock sucking, stalking, abduction, general yandere themes, dacryphilia)   Word Count: 2.8k (Wow, okay, so this is a very special post, it is in celebration and thanks for getting me to 2.5k followers, and it is also for Halloween. I have been working on this ALL day. This post has a story with a new demon lord OC, AND, for the first time ever, and there is an audio component of the yandere OC speaking to YOU! I had to upload the audio in a separate post which can be found nowhere because I deleted it. I hope you all enjoy this food, your Halloween Feast, thank you all so much for following me. Please excuse any mistakes as this was not beta read.) (The music in the background of the audio is Horror Drone 1, music by audionautix.com. The voice of Ledlam, the demon, was provided by me, artwork by @solariahalsey​ in exchange for writing. Edit: Art was removed due to being NSFW and I didn’t want to get in trouble and audio was removed because it was cringe and only got 100 likes.)
 One late night you had come home from work and exited your car to step into the chilly air. Two hooded figures leapt from the shadows, putting a rag of what could only be chloroform over your face before quickly taking your keys, stuffing you into your own car, and driving away.  When you woke from your forcefully induced slumber you struggled to recollect the proceedings of the following night, all you knew was that you had been on your way home and now you were on some kind of stone slab in a large room. The walls were adorned with complex runes and sigils that had been painted with something red and suspicious, the room was dimly illuminated by torches along the walls, and an ominous chanting could be heard coming from an adjoining room.  Your limbs were bound with rope and tied to four posts on the cold hard stone block you were trapped on. You thrashed and tried to yell, but your mouth was gagged and your muffled screams of terror only served to let your captors know you were awake.  They stopped their chanting, their unholy prayer to a significant demonic deity, and suddenly a set of heavy wooden doors burst open and a few dozen cultists filed in silently and sat in pews laid out before the stone altar.  One cultist, who you assumed was their leader as he was dressed in more intricate robes, stood before the altar and looked down upon you before turning to face his flock.  “Fellow worshipers of Ledlam, Shepherd of the Shadows, we assemble here today in the house of worship to fulfill the will of our lord.” The cult leader turned back to you, now holding a ceremonial athame. Your eyes fixated on it and tears rolled down your face as you redoubled your yells and struggles. “We now commit this lucky chosen soul to the service of Ledlam.”  And in one smooth motion he had cut your throat, your blood pooling into grooves carved into the altar, dark magic sizzled and popped as the cultist chanted and the arcane symbols were filled with your blood.  Your life quickly drained away.  Now you were in hell, through no fault of your own, in the home of Demon Lord Ledlam. Unbeknownst to you, Ledlam had been watching you for nearly a year. He had used his powers to peer into the mortal realm and find someone suitable to his tastes, that someone had been you.  From the moment he first laid his eyes upon you he knew that, on this very Halloween, you would be sent to him. It was the only date that the veils between Earth, Heaven, and Hell all thinned a bit and those using the right magic rituals and using significant power could bend the rules a bit.  And so it was that upon your death your soul had been funneled here by the ritual of his followers and by the gravity of his abilities. Otherwise you would have either walked the veil before reincarnation or you would have ascended into Heaven.  Now you were confused and in an old style castle. Hell was a lot like feudal Earth had been, society was just often more violent. There were many different territories in Hell and Ledlam was the demon lord who ruled over the largest piece.  You could see from the windows outside that you were no longer on Earth, the sky was an angry crimson red, crashes of thunder echoed periodically as flashes of black lightning danced across the tumultuous sky.  Understandably you were shaking. Anyone would be scared in Hell, but your soul, your very essence, was not for such a place as this. Under normal circumstances only an impure soul would be here. The effect was that you felt much more uncomfortable here than others would, a creeping sense of unease that permeated every pore of your being.  Ledlam, however, was beyond excited. He was putting the finishing touches on a feast in honor of you being here with him. He had all favorite foods, well, as close as he could get to your favorite foods with the type of flora and fauna that were available in Hell, he had his horns polished to make a good impression on you, and he even had the dining hall décor changed to match your favorite colors.  You could hear the stomp of his footsteps approach the room you were in as his great hoofed feet hit the hard surface of the floor. Not knowing what it was you ducked behind a chair in a desperate bid to hide from whatever monster could possibly call this place home.  What you saw turned your stomach, a beast straight out of a nightmare. A colossal demon, well over 7 feet tall, opened the door and stepped into the room. He had sharp shiny horns protruding from his head of black and red hair, his legs were covered in thick white fur and his feet were mighty hooves, his body was all muscle, and his nails sharp and black. An upside down cross was tattooed on the back of his hand and a spaded tail could be seen moving behind him.  The demon was naked except for a bird skull necklace and a loincloth, which was mostly useless, as his large cock and balls swung quite visibly and pendulously below it.  His four yellow eyes glowed in the darkness of the poorly lit room, scanning for any sign of your presence and finding you almost instantly.  “(Y/N)! There you are, come on, your food will get cold!” He spoke with a deep booming voice, one that echoed unnaturally. Ledlam approached you and grabbed your arm, completely apathetic to your resistance and only silently enjoying your terror.  He dragged you into the dining hall and set you down at a small table opposite of him with a large plate of food between you two, evidently for you both to share. You just looked down at your lap silently and awkwardly. Your demon captor just stared at you with unblinking eyes as he smirked at your fear. It was so delicious.  You flinched at that wicked voice when he spoke again.  “How rude of me, in my excitement I forgot to introduce myself, I am Ledlam, lord of this territory.” He reached across the table, put his hand under your chin, and lifted your head up, your eyes threatening to cry just from the pure fear you were experiencing from him and your situation as a whole.  “You need to look at me when we are having a conversation, okay (Y/N)” At this you nodded obediently, too scared to speak, but your acknowledgement seemed to please him as you forced yourself to look at his frightening visage.  Ledlam reveled in your fear, he couldn’t help it, he did not meet too many human souls up in his castle and the few times he ventured out the souls were long since hardened and immune to the simple sight of a demon scaring them, even a frightening one with his violent reputation.  Your fear was just so cute and pure. He could not help but enjoy it.  “Leaving your Earth body behind takes a lot of energy, you need to eat, my little human. You cannot really die in Hell, but you can still suffer.” As he finished speaking he held something to your lips that looked similar to a dish you had enjoyed while living. A little mini quiche.  You managed to speak in a small trembling voice, “N-no that’s okay I’m n-”  “I was NOT asking. Open your mouth!”  Not daring to disobey him, you blushed as you opened your mouth and took a bite of mini quiche that he fed to you. You chewed slowly and took a nibble of food from the plate intermittently to keep Ledlam appeased.  “Such a perfect little human, that is why I had you brought here, you will be a wonderful mate!” Ledlam could not wait to hold you and kiss you and make you writhe in pure pleasure, he had been alone for untold millennia. None of the demons born of hell nor the humans sentenced here were what he sought. He wanted you. A sweet, kind, pure being. Unspoiled by the ravages of Hell, who he would protect and keep safe.  Though you could not speak after hearing what he wanted you here for, your surprise covered your face.  “Don’t worry, I know you are scared, my angel, but I will keep you safe.” At these words you started sobbing. You wanted to be home, safe and curled up in your bed. Instead you had been killed and had your soul dragged into hell. It wasn’t fair.  As much as Ledlam loved seeing your face streaked with tears he did not want you to be too upset.  The demon lord left his seat and tried to pick you up, but for the first time since you wound up in Hell you found the will to run. You ducked under his arms and ran straight out of the dining hall, running frantically, luckily the way out was pretty direct and you wasted no time rushing out the door.    It appeared there were no guards or anyone else around and you rushed towards the forest surrounding Ledlam’s castle. Just as the sky was like an angry wound flashing with dark lightning so too was the forest completely alien. Flora with purple, red, and black foliage, strange animal noises, and grass and soil that just somehow seemed… off…  But you could hear Ledlam shouting for you so you proceeded into the cover of the trees anyway.  It was not a fun experience for you, some of the bushes lashed at you leaving wounds on your legs, you were getting bitten by any number of horrible insects, and just to make matters absolutely as bad as possible it began to rain. Blood. It was raining blood.  To say you were miserable would have been a grave understatement. At least the blood rains dispersed all the insects. You trudged through the forest, trying to put as much distance between Ledlam and yourself as you possibly could.  It felt like you had been running for hours, your entire body ached, and this rain was making your skin itch. You found a little cave at the base of a cliff and decided to take shelter until the weather was a bit more favorable.  But it was only minutes before you heard the booming voice of your pursuer nearby.  “I KNOW you are close (Y/N), did you REALLY think that you could escape from me? This is my kingdom, my playground.” The demonic voice was slowly getting louder, you hid a bit deeper in the cave behind a boulder. “Are you in heeeere my little angel?”  “I can smell your wonderful scent even through the blood rain darling~” Now you could hear his hooves against the ground, drawing ever nearer. “I love a good hunt every now and then too little dove, but my patience is wearing oh so very thin. Wouldn’t you rather get out of this scary cave and go back home to bounce on my cock?”  Suddenly you saw four glowing eyes peering at you in the darkness.  “Ah, there you are darling... mmm… I was going to wait until I got you nice and comfy back at home before mating, but seeing you covered in all this warm blood… mmm… it is really doing something to me. I really don’t think I have any choice other than to take you right here~”  You did not know how he could see you so well, but you backed up until your back was against the rough wall of the cave. As he stepped towards you he uttered some kind of spell that illuminated the cave in a soft light for your benefit, you could now see that his uncut cock was fully erect bobbing excitedly with each step that he took.  For what felt like the hundredth time today warm tears began streaming down your cheeks. Ledlam smirked, you just looked so irresistible like that. He continued his approach and stopped when his precum leaking dick was just in front of your lips. His intent was obvious.  “Pl-please… I don’t want t-”  “Suck. If you don’t get it nice and lubed up then what we do next will hurt quite a bit my little angel~” This wasn’t true, he did not and would not actually harm his sweetie, and his cock made enough natural lube so he did not need your saliva. But ingesting his precum would actually help to relax and arouse you and he relished the fear his threat got from you.  Your lip quivered before you reluctantly opened your lips and he slid just a little more than the tip of his prick into your wet mouth. You stroked his dick as you sloppily sucked on it. His skin was extremely warm and his precum was strangely heady. Ledlam knew it would take a minute or so before his precum changed your demeanor any, so he had a bit of time to enjoy your clumsy nervous sucking.  The demon ran his fingers through your blood drenched hair gently as you continued your task. Such rains were exceedingly rare, to have been drenched by one before completing his unholy union with you was surely a sign it was meant to be.  You licked up and down the shaft, trying to get as much spit on his massive tool as possible, he caressed your face gingerly, careful not to hurt you with his sharp nails as he used his thumb to wipe away your gorgeous tears.  The drug-like effect of his fluid was starting to become apparent. You slowly stopped crying and your muscles relaxed considerably, relieving all the tension that had been stressing your soul since your death. You found yourself more into pleasuring him as you gradually became more aroused.  Nervous sucking and a desire to lube him up to ease future pain were replaced by eager licking and a need to swallow more of his precum.  “Mmm, so good and obedient for me (Y/N), but I think we are ready to do something else little angel.” You looked up at him with a flushed face, desperation and confusion obvious on your face, all your previous fear completely melted away.  Ledlam peeled off your wet clothing, easily slicing through it with his sharp nails. He leaned you over against a large stone and then kneeled behind you, his rough hands exploring your legs and thighs. Unable to stretch you with his fingers with his large nails he instead opted to use his tongue. It slid into you effortlessly. You moaned in desperate pleasure as he moaned at the taste of you.  His serpent-like tongue thoroughly massaged and stretched your entrance, he licked, stretched, and kissed it until you started sobbing again, but this time in needy agony, yearning for more than just his tongue and mouth.  “Shhh, I’ll take care of it darling.” Your demon lover turned you around. You draped your arms over his broad shoulders, dizzy with a need that you didn’t understand. Strong calloused hands gripped your waist. Ledlam pulled you into his lap and allowed you to nuzzle your head into his neck as he slowly lowered you and the tip of his cock teased your hole, smearing thick precum into it, before he finally sat you down on it.  You moaned, literally drunk with pleasure. Ledlam took you to the base, moving you up and down on him, your stomach bulging from the enormity of his shaft each time you were forced back down, though there was no trace of pain or even discomfort.  Seeing you utterly fucked out of your mind as he bounced you in his lap was even better than seeing your eyes wet and full of tears. You leaned against him, nuzzling lovingly against his chest, as he started plunging into you just a bit faster, his weighty nuts smacking your ass with each sinful thrust.  Pleasure mounted in both of you until it could be held back no longer and you both came at the same moment, as he filled you up with potent demonic seed the ritual was complete and your soul was irreversibly bound to his.  If there was any doubt as to who owned you it was certainly gone now. You were Ledlam’s angel from now and into the fathomless depths of eternity.  You were too exhausted from the sex to stand, and too drunk off his cum to think, so Ledlam pressed a kiss to your lips before picking you up and carrying you all the way home.
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lilspacewolfie · 2 months
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would it be possible to do a cardinal copia x reader first date but the day of the date copia ends up forgetting due to a stressful day, and expects them to be mad but ends up telling copia its ok and ends with them cuddling copia and making sure he gets a good night sleep.
Thank you for being my first request! I really hope you have as much fun reading this as I did writing it! <3
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Content: 1.6k words, gn!reader, very little description to keep it as gender-neutral as possible, soft copia, failed date, sweet ending, just all around very soft and fluffy, no beta we die like nihil!
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The little Italian place in town is quaint and surprisingly busy given its midweek. It’s a small hole in the wall, cramped but lively, with beautifully arched windows and candles dotting each table that give off a warm, intimate ambience. 
Arranging a date with Copia had proven to be tougher than expected with both of your busy schedules. But when you managed to figure out the time, Copia had insisted on this place.  
You arrived early—about thirty minutes to be exact, not wanting to be late for your first date. You’ve gotten all dressed up and probably spent a little more on a new outfit than is warranted for a first date, but you want to make a good impression. 
There’s faint music playing above you, slow and swaying. You try not to think about how long you’ve been sitting there, growing increasingly more awkward as the minutes tick by. When you finally do give in and pull out your phone to check the time, you can’t help but feel a bit troubled. It’s close to seven. Anxiety rolls through you like a storm cloud and you swallow, debating on sending him a message. You had agreed to meet at six so you could eat, and then have enough time to take a casual stroll to the Ministry together. You had hoped to enjoy the spring air, but now that's starting to feel like a dream that sadly won't come true. 
You slip your phone back into your pocket and lean on a fist, drumming your fingers anxiously atop the red and white check tablecloth. It’s probably nothing, he’s a busy man, after all. Maybe he just got held up with some last-minute things. So then why hasn’t he texted? 
Copia is the last man you would expect to stand anyone up without reason, and you know he would alert you if he was running late. He’s sweet and thoughtful—you’ve been with him for long enough to gather that he’s one to commit a bit of self-flagellation when he thinks he’s messed up. 
Around you, couples cosy up and laugh, sip wine together and indulge in the restaurant's luscious food that smells divine. Your jealous stomach growls and you swallow thickly when the waitress approaches you for the second time that evening. You can see on her face that she’s hesitant to ask if you’re ready to order, and there’s something akin to pity in her eyes. Not that you need it. 
You’re staring at the rose in the little red vase on the table when she asks: “Are you ready to order?” 
Maybe he isn’t coming. Maybe he forgot? No, no, that's a stupid thought. Even Copia would tell you that himself. You’re a priority to him. 
An idea hits you. 
“Actually,” you say, turning over your laminated menu, “I think I am.”
She smiles, pulling out a little flip book and a pen. 
The Ministry is quiet when you make it back, carrying hot, precious cargo in a white paper bag. Your footfalls echo on the marble floor as you traverse the old halls, passing preserved paintings, stone statues of your Dark Lord and stained glass windows that bathe the halls in colour even at night. 
You know where Copia’s office is located, near Imperators just down the hall, and so you make your way over. When you get there the hallway is darkened, but you see exactly what you expected. His door is closed and there’s a thin slither of light spilling from beneath onto the oak flooring. So, he has been held up. 
When you knock, loud enough to be heard but receive no response, worry sits heavy in your chest. You knock again and wait, but still, there’s no response. Your gaze falls to the brass doorknob which you grasp and turn, the door creaking a bit when it’s open. 
Inside is warm, the light from the beautiful Tiffany-styled lamp bathing the room in a cosy orange. His desk is at the far end in front of a massive arched window and there’s a stack of papers on his desk. When you do finally see him, you’re suddenly not vexed or hurt anymore. In fact, you have to bite your lip to keep from giggling. 
Copia is snoring softly, slumped over his old desk with his pen still balanced in hand. He looks so peaceful that you don’t want to wake him, but you know his back and shoulders won’t be thanking him tomorrow if you don’t. 
Carefully you close the door, tiptoe over to the front of his desk and set the paper takeaway bag on the chair. When you round to his side and get a good look at him, you bite your lip again and something uncoils in your chest. The black paint around his eyes is a bit smudged and his handsome face is picturesque, the wrinkles across his forehead softened by the light. 
You touch his arm first, squeezing and rubbing his bicep through his red cassock. You rest your other hand on his wild, mousy brown hair that's sticking up and stroke it down gently. 
“Copia?” You whisper, shaking him a bit. 
He stirs, inhaling and stiffening before his mismatched eyes blink open. He’s awake in an instant, flustered and a bit out of it, and you step back to let him get his bearings. 
“Amore?” He blinks at you a few times, forcing himself to sit up in his leather desk chair. He glances at the clock above the door, then at you, then back at your clothes and his shoulders slump. You watch the horror and recognition play across his face.  
“Oh, cazzo,” he swears quietly, scrubbing a hand over his face, as he looks back up at you with big, glossy eyes. “Amore, perdonami, ti prego… I… Sister wanted me to finish some last minute things and I must’ve fallen asleep and—merda…” he says, anguished. 
“Copia, shh, it’s okay,” you soothe, taking his face in your hands and stroking your thumbs across the hair of his sideburns. He leans into your hold, wide-eyed. You shake your head, smiling and he deflates, pressing one of his leather-clad hands to yours on his face. 
“But you got all dressed up and—“
“It’s okay,” you say again and you think he might actually start crying, but you’re not about to let him catch the self-flagellation train tonight. 
“I’m so sorry, amore,” he whispers again, sadly. 
“Don’t apologise,” you chide gently, “you’re tired. It’s okay. I figured something was wrong when you didn’t show. Don’t be sorry, I know Imperator has been hard on you lately.”
He winces a bit, but you lean in and kiss him tenderly, soothing his hurt like balm on a stinging wound. He relents, stroking his thumb over your knuckles, and when you pull away he sighs. You know he’ll feel awful about this for a while, but at least you might be able to help him feel less bad. 
“I brought takeout,” you flick your eyes to the paper bag, pulling back. Copia follows, taking one of your hands and you help pull him to his feet. 
He groans, and winces again, muttering a few choice swears that make you giggle. When he looks you up and down with a new form of clarity that isn’t veiled by torment, his expression relaxes. 
“Sei bellissima, amore mio.”
You lean in and press your mouth to his, brief and chaste and Copia hums, wrapping you up in his arms for a proper hug.
You take dinner back to his room, letting the relaxed atmosphere carry you both into its sweet lull. 
You borrow one of Copia’s shirts and his many tracksuit bottoms to change into while he freshens up and scrubs the paint from his face. When you’re both done, you pop Bram Stroker’s Dracula on low in the background. You lounge together on his bed, munching on the takeout pasta and drinking the wine Copia had intended to give you at the restaurant. Every time he attempts to apologise for missing your date, you silence him with another sweet kiss that tastes of wine and creamy pasta sauce, watching him blush sweetly. 
By the time you’re both finished, bellies full and thoroughly warmed from the wine, you’re both too exhausted and comfortable to move. 
Copia’s flush to your side curled around you with his head on your shoulder while you play with his soft hair. You press the occasional kiss to his temple, smelling his zesty shower cream and the heady wine on his breath. You watch, quietly amused, as he tries to focus on the movie, blinking hard and forcing his eyes to stay open. You love it when he’s like this, vulnerable and sleep-warm. You don’t need a fancy restaurant. This is perfect.
“Sleep if you want,” you tell him, trailing your fingers lazily up and down his bicep. 
“Are you sure?” He mutters guiltily, lifting his eyes to yours. There's still small flecks of black around his eyes that never seem to leave. He looks adorable and exhausted. You gently wipe away the smudge of black on the tip of his freckled nose.
“Of course,” you smile at him. “You had a long day, Satan knows you need it.” 
Copia turns his face and kisses the skin of your collarbone, adjusting again before he settles. You tug the blanket that’s haphazardly thrown over you both further up his body and make sure he’s tucked in.
He’s asleep in mere moments, body growing heavy against your side, and the sound of his slow, laboured breaths mixes with the buzz of the movie as it slowly plays out.
masterlist ⛧ Ao3
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generallysapphic · 1 year
Text
how you start dating shuriri headcanons (+18)
fluff and a little smut!
i’m so utterly obsessed with these two and the possibilities of a romantic relationship with them so you know i had to write it; hope you enjoy! the +18 section is marked off with its own warnings
dividers by @firefly-graphics
reader is a shy, nerdy, black femme college junior who lives in chicago
inspired by chicago by michael jackson
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riri spots you first, maybe she’s visiting home and there you go looking fine as fuck and she just has to say something
y’all get to flirting and you’re really feeling her but you can’t help but wonder why she looks so familiar.. you scrap it off and get her number so y’all can keep it contact
flash forward maybe two weeks and the fucking Queen of Wakanda decides to do a tour of the new building she provided for your school and oh lord does she look great but there she is!
riri is right beside her, holding her hand laughing and joking and now you get it
the girl you met was the queen’s girlfriend!
immediately you try to text riri and tell her you’re not looking for that type of relationship, that you’re not gonna break them up and riri needs to get her shit together and leave you alone until she does so
you get left on read and can’t help but feel bad, maybe you were too harsh? whatever it doesn’t matter you’re not a home wrecker of any kind so you leave it alone
that night you’re in your dorm just listening to music and there’s a knock, because of course there is and it’s none over than
shuri oh shit
you’re immediately stammering, already apologizing “i swear to god i had no clue yall was together like for real i knew i knew her but like not like that but oh my god, if you’re mad at me or anything just like make it quick and please just feed my cat back at home” you try to get it all out before she laughs
she’s laughing that gorgeous, bubbly laugh. you’re pleading for your life and she’s laughing
“you think i’m going to kill you because you’re flirting with my girlfriend? really?”
holy shit her accent is crazy sexy because of course it is up close but you try to stay grounded in your thoughts “umm yes?”
she smiles slyly at you “you’re very beautiful i can understand why she was”
your eyes widen and now you’re really confused because what the fuck? now shes flirting with you? after finding out you might’ve been the cause of any tension at home?
“uh i umm thank you i appreciate it uhh” “it’s okay, love, riri didn’t do anything wrong nor is anyone upset with you, alright?”
the confusion is apparent on your face, “so uhh what… what now?” you ask because you really don’t fucking know
shuri smiles again , “well her invite still stands if you wish to date her, of course,” WHAT?? “but you don’t have to, obviously. however if you’re interested in me i’m open as well,”
Literally what the fuck is happening right now
“but — but you guys are—“
“together? yes we are. and we both like you, y/n”
maybe you’ve fainted and gone to heaven, maybe you passed out and this is your final dream
the queen stands in your speechlessness “hey it’s alright if you’re not interested—“
you yell to cut her of “No!! No i’m very interested! i just — i jst wasn’t expecting it is all! i mean you both .. liking me oh my god” it’s really embarrassing how much heat you can feel is on your face
shuri raises any eyebrow, “what’s not to like? i feel offended, you judging my taste?” she smirks at you and you’re giggling
“no, no my queen i would never, i’m sorry” she smiles gently, “yeah, good. so, what do you say?”
it’s literally no other answer; “yes, i’d love to go out with you both”
it’s uphill from there; shuri takes you back to the fanciest hotel you’ve literally ever been in because when the fuck chicago get fancy hotels? and riri is waiting for you both at the door
“damn finally, i was starting to think you were fucking her with me, shit” she jokes and shuri laughs but you feel heat rise to your face and your lower end but you brush it off
“i told you i’d be back, we just talked, right, y/n?”
god your name sounds heavenly on her tongue, “yeah we just talked. and im sorry riri for just assuming you was gonna cheat on the queen of wakanda or anything, i was just..”
“confused, yeah i get it, no worries.” she looks you up and down, “so, you walking in here like you said yes so i can only assume..?”
you giggle and nod your head “yes yes i said yes,” and she fists bump and looks and shuri and smiles who says “now let’s talk”
y’all talk for about three hours that (thank god you ain’t got class tomorrow) and you ask a bunch of questions, most they were expecting
“so you literally told her about me the second you got home? damn i know i’m fine but that’s actually crazy” “okay yeah yeah, no need to get all big headed i was just excited and i knew shuri would like you too, next question!” and shuri mostly laughs
you plan your first date with both of them and then your first date with each of them separately while theyre still in chicago
the group date takes place at a fancy ass restaurant you have literally never heard of, and shuri buys your outfit while riri pays for dinner
(you quickly realize that they’re the spoiling type)
it was a lovely evening that ended in cheek kisses for and from the both of them
riri’s date comes first, as she did ask you out first initially and her home town is chicago so she wants to show you some stuff you didn’t even know about
y’all go to her favorite hideout burger joint that’s placed between two walls and a bank and she introduces you to the most unhealthy burger you’ve ever eaten in your entire life. you tell her about your move to chicago and how much you want to travel but still have grounds at home. you tell her about your classes and your major and she listens to you so intensely that you try to shy up at some parts.
you split a milkshake and then walk around her favorite mall talking and kissing softly as you get to know her after the date she suggests you guys “smoke off the rest of the day” and pulls a joint from god knows where
y’all go back to the hotel to get high while shuri is still out doing tours and walkabouts
you’ve smoked maybe once or twice for real for real so most of the night is you choking and riri laughing at you and handing water and then choking herself but all in all the two of you are giggling and talking
shuri comes back later that night and sighs before making you both go to bed and stop smoking. riri kisses your “huge ass forehead” (her words) goodnight and you sleep there in your date outfit.
shuri’s date happens three days later, two days before they have to leave. she takes you to an art museum one so huge that you’re sure most of was just fake paintings they made to fill in the space
y’all work around talk about your career goals and your life up until this point and a little of what you told riri the previous date. much like riri shuri is staring into you and listening like your preaching gospel and you get shy again before she encourages you some more
you eat at a seafood place that shuri booked all out just for you and the date so you guys could have some privacy “i don’t like people in my business” she states when you see the empty restaurant “the world nearly crumbled to pieces when it was revealed riri and i were together, and i can not doubt they would harass you as well.”
she’s too thoughtful you think and it makes you blush, “yeah that makes sense”
you talk some more before the night is over and she escorts you back to the hotel.
even though you know you’re rushing, the wine in your veins makes you bold and once youre back with both of them at the hotel, you blurt out “so how are we supposed to have sex?”
and it’s so embarrassing because you did not mean for that to sound the way it did, riri is laughing her ass off and shuri is staring at you incredulously
and you start rambling again “no wait , oh my god why did i say that? um i meant like, fuck, you know like y’all been together so y’all know each other but like me i don’t really get out out yknow? like i had like one girl i was messing with for real but she was just as inexperienced as i was so..”
riri is still dying on the floor and shuri chuckles before calming you down with her hands on your arms, rubbing up and down “calm down, alright? we can talk about that, right now if you want, but don’t stress out, understood?”
ahh she likes to be dominant. okay that’s cool “yeah yeah, i get it, totally” you mumble out
riri sighs wiping the tears from her eyes as she gets up from the floor, hoodie wrinkled and shorts barely visible, “oh my god that was funny as fuck holy shit,”
“before we talk about anything let’s get undressed, hmm?” you look at shuri with wide eyes and riri laughs again and shuri sighs. “no y/n we’re not doing anything tonight, stay with me”
right right yeah okay “shit right okay”
once you’re in your pajamas (one of shuris hoodies and some loose pants) y’all sit in a circle and riri cuts on some music just to ease some tension
(+18 section below!!!)
praise kink, bullying kink, talk of dom/sub relationships, use of pet names, dom!shuri, switch!riri, switch!reader, talk of sex, no actual sex (i’ll write some soon!)
riri starts, just as bold as she was when she came up to you that fateful day, “so what do you like? or do you want us to go first?”
you shy up again, “umm no you guys can go first”
and she smirks “well i’m a switch just to get it out of the way. i don’t mind bottoming i just don’t do it often, i really only did for shuri for real”
oh shit just right into it, huh?
“and i don’t bottom at all” shuri pipes in, staring directly into your eyes, “i suppose that’s dominant, right? but i’m not opposed to certain touches”
fuck fuck fuck , you sit cross cross to hide your arousal “um i guess i’m a switch, but i like bottoming more i think”
“yeah you look like it” riri says looking at her purse and you blush, did you really? before you respond riri gets up and sparks another blunt (because of course she does) and continues, “that’s really another reason i came up to you because you look like you listen well, and like it’s really obvious you got something going on with being told what to do, right?”
“i— i mean i guess,” shuri chimes in again “don’t you?”
her eye contact is dangerous and something makes you feel like you have to answer her “yes. yes i do.
they both smirk, “got it,” riri says confidently
oh fuck you just completely outed yourself huh?
“what ..” you clear your throat “what else do you guys like?”
“obedience” shuri says while riri says “brat”
you look between them, “okay which means..?”
shuri starts, her accent cutting the air like butter, “i need you to listen to me, that’s really it. whatever i say goes according to your limits and of course we’ll have a safe word but i don’t fuck around with what’s mine,”
jesus fucking christ . you look at riri who starts “i like brats. bold as fuck i like knocking you down a peg. that’s why im a switch because if you can tell me what to do i’ll listen, but if not then, well” she shrugs and smokes a bit
“and you, love?” shuri asks and you’re looking at her with wide eyes, “what do you want from us?”
you think for a bit and try to settle the pulsing you feel downstairs. “umm i like when i get told what to do, so like both of what you guys said. i like being ..” you sigh before you admit it “like umm lightly bullied? if that makes sense and i like when i’m on top, like physically.”
you add in “and i like to listen. so i get praised. so like . a praise kink. yeah”
you end it there before you feel like your face will melt and it’s quiet until shuri laughs and says “i can work with that”
you perk up, “yeah?”
she smiles back “yeah. you riri?”
riri, now high as fuck, nods along “yeah i’m good, just horny as hell though” she says it so causally and you laugh at her boldness
“yes that was bound to happen, but it’s been a long day and we need to pack tomorrow. y/n are you spending the night?”
riri gets up to get water and you look and shuri and nod, “yeah, yeah i can stay”
she smiles back “good. bed then, yeah?” there she is again making demands
you blindly follow, “okay,”
(+18 plus section over!)
the next morning is full of being kissed and packing; they’re both very grateful for you opening up last night and you can tell they mean it when they say ‘thank you’ when you do anything
though their trip is coming to an end, they make plans to be back and see you in two weeks once your finals are over and you can visit wakanda for an extended time
you’re given your very own pair of kimiyo beads before they head off with the dora milaje right behind them
shuri lifts your chin and kisses you goodbye “goodbye love,” she says it in xhosa and you absolutely melt and say bye back
riri hugs you tightly and kisses all over your face until she stops on your mouth and nearly knocks you over “bye baby, we’ll be back okay?”
you’re giggling still a little dizzy “hehe bye riri,”
you wave to them both before the ship doors close and it begins to hover slightly
while waving your kimoyo beads go off and it’s a text from riri “please back up girl this shit is about to take off fr ;)” and your eyes widen and you back away as far as possible, still waving
once the ship is out of your eyesight you sigh and ask the griot in your beads to set an alarm for 15 days and 3 hours
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Anndddd finished i hope you guys enjoyed and sorry for any spelling or grammar mistakes!
send in any requests!
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blue-sadie · 8 months
Note
So i've seen this edit about quaritch and spider with that song "oh i love it and hate it at the same time, you and i drinking posion from the same vine" and just image it; reader who has an avatar and neteyam as her mate and she told everybody that her mom was na'vi and her dad was an avatar. When lo'ak and neteyam went to save spider they see reader in her human form and she thinks neteyam is dissapointed in her. Her avatar dies and she has to live with neteyam in her human form. The reader thinks he hates her or smtg. I thank you very much if you could write my ideea or just react <3
Sorry this might not be exactly what you wanted but I hope you like it 😁
Our Love Is Pure
Neteyam x Human Reader
Summary: sometimes our thoughts get the best of us causing us either failure or fortune
Warning: music = lyrics, reader death (kind of)
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3rd person pov
Neteyam watched the horizon hoping and praying to see Norman's helicopter but every time he does his heart just breaks all over again.
Telling myself I won't go there Oh, but I know that I won't care
You saved him, you pushed him out the way and took the bullet, the bullet that would've killed him but it killed you instead.
He held your avatar as it died he pleaded and begged for eywa to give you another chance you deserved it while he didn't he should have protected you he should have taken it not you.
With each day passing no news or sight of you, his heart arches more and more he struggles to look after himself but what he didn't know it was the same for you.
Tryna wash away all the blood I've spilt This lust is a burden that we both share Two sinners can't atone from a lone prayer Souls tied, intertwined by our pride and guilt There's darkness in the distance
It took norm days just to get you to speak but with each word becomes more shakey, what is supposed to happen between the two of you.
You never really hung out with him in your human form mostly because of safety reasons would he still want to be with you.
Those thoughts were clouding your head most of the day you would spend in your room staring at the way norman says your eyes get duller by the day, your skin has become paler and your body thinner because of the lack of food and water.
From the way that I've been livin' But I know I can't resist it Oh, I love it and I hate it at the same time You and I drink the poison from the same vine
Norman didn't know what to do he didn't know if contacting neteyam would help or just make it worse but what pushed him over the edge is when you came stumbling into the kitchen bearly holding yourself up.
You collapsed and he caught you before you hit the floor you blacked out, that was his breaking point they put you onto one of the med beds attaching an iv to your arm and made sure you were stable.
And once they knew you were safe he contacted jake to let him know about the situation and jake could almost say the same was happening there.
Oh, I love it and I hate it at the same time Hidin' all of our sins from the daylight From the daylight, runnin' from the daylight From the daylight, runnin' from the daylight Oh, I love it and I hate it at the same time
When jake finally told neteyam what happened with you neteyam finally expressed emotion other then sadness and finally did something other then stare out into the open sea.
He tried to get on his ikran but his father and mother tried to stop him and reason with him to stay.
He finally burst and let his emotions out shocking his parents screaming at them that he needs and too see you and how he would be dead without you
Tellin' myself it's the last time Can you spare any mercy that you might find If I'm down on my knees again? Deep down, way down, Lord, I try Try to follow your light, but it's night time Please, don't leave me in the end
He yelled about all the times you were there for him and now he's gonna be there for you, his parents let him go because either he was going back.
The ride was long and terrible his lack of food and sleep was making his ikran nervous and almost crash afew times.
He finally felt relieved when he saw his home land in the distance and he spoke to himself praying that you would hear him, I'm coming baby hold on.
There's darkness in the distance I'm beggin' for forgiveness (ooh) But I know I might resist it, oh Oh, I love it and I hate it at the same time You and I drink the poison from the same vine
He dodged the floating rocks and ignored as some ikran riders tried to talk to him as they flew past he didn't care all he cared about was you.
When he landed he could tell something was off when norman came running at him and telling him you need him.
He didn't even let norman finish and dashed into the lab his eyes widening as he saw the many scientists crowed around you.
Oh, I love it and I hate it at the same time Hidin' all of our sins from the daylight From the daylight, runnin' from the daylight From the daylight, runnin' from the daylight Oh, I love it and I hate it at the same time Oh, I love it and I hate it at the same time You and I drink the poison from the same vine
His heart clench and his body began to sway with dizziness he already lost you once and he wasn't gonna lose you again.
He crouched at the head of you bed looking down at your face you and your avatar were almost identical.
He slowly and softly caressed your small face with his fingers as he spoke to you as tears streamed down his face, baby please don't do this to me I can't lose you again.
Oh, I love it and I hate it at the same time Hidin' all of our sins from the daylight From the daylight, runnin' from the daylight From the daylight, runnin' from the daylight Oh, I love it and I hate it at the same time
He sat there even after the other scientists left he sat there staring at you his hand clenching yours He was to scared to let go.
To scared to lose you, it only took 2 hours before you woke you your face twisted in confusion as you felt someone holding your hand.
It took you a couple minutes to open your eyes but when they did they filled with tears, neteyam tried to hug you but all you did was push him away.
He felt rejected and hurt in till he heard you speak "why are you here" you sniffled he felt confused.
"W-what do you mean baby" he murmured trying to think of reasons you would rejected him.
"Neteyam my avatar is dead" your voice was strained and raspy "what does that have to do with anything" he asked sitting beside your bed.
You didn't know if was joking or just trying to fool you "n-nete i-" "do you think I'd just leave you because your avatar is dead".
It was like he could read my mind, I looked away from him ashamed "yn I fell for you, your beautiful personality not your body" he murmured caressing my face and bringing it to look at his.
"I fell for your clumsiness, your idiotic ideas that always get us into trouble I fell for you" his words drew a quiet giggle from you making him smile.
"I feel for your mind and heart"
Tag.List
@greekgods15
@sweetirilly
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pastel-peach-writes · 8 months
Note
CAITVI X YOU IN A BAND PLEASE OH MY LORD !!?? BONUS IF UR SINGING EITHER A LOVE SONG OR A SPICY ONE N THEY R JUST LOOKING AT EACHOTHER N THEN U ?!!!
Comin' up!
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Hot Rocker | CaitVi x Reader
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╰┈➤ PLOT: Caitlyn and Vi have a partner in a band and holy crap, they can't get enough of them.
╰┈➤ WARNINGS: Suggestive Themes, Lowkey The Dirtiest Thing I've Written As A PG-13 Writer, Musician/Singer Reader(separately and together), Mentions Of Overly Touchy Groupies
⍣ ೋ Enjoy!⍣ ೋ
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– First off, Caitlyn and Vi absolutely love that you're in a band.
– They can't keep their eyes off of you every time you perform.
– They love how the lights compliment your complexion, and how your hair/body moves as you play and/or sing. Not to mention the cool ass outfits
– Vi loves you with multiple rings, ripped pants, and wild hair. Maybe even an open button-down. Basically, she loves the rocker masc look on you. She says its badass
– Caitlyn loves that look too, obviously. But she mainly loves the look on your face rather than the outfits.
– Yes, she's into fashion and loves what you wear, but when your face softens as you play a romantic ballad or how your face scrunched as you concentrate on your instrument
– speaking of instruments, if you play any handheld string instrument or the piano, Vi will never stop asking you what those hands do.
– it made your face heat up the first few times, but the later times, vi received eye-rolls, smiles, and sometimes a wink.
– even if you play the fucking drums, Vi would always ask because you often twirl the sticks between your fingers.
– If you're not much of a player, but more of a singer, Vi would ask why aren't you that vocal when she goes down on you.
– WELP.
– vocal or not during spicy times, she would always comment on it and Caitlyn will always flick her ear.
– okay, before we get into you singing a spicy song on them or furthermore on how they act while you perform, let's talk about them and your groupies.
– It's not like they don't love them! They do and they're your fans.
– If you like them, they love them
– but some of the groupies don't understand boundaries and/or talk about you in a certain way they don't like.
– it's not gross. it's the normal, "omg they're so hot!" "did you see how they acted during the finale? ohhh my god, I'm on my knees" "they could run me over with a bus and not only will i apologize for getting in the way, I'd say thank you.
– Okay, that last line makes Vi chuckle as she overhears it. Caitlyn is more concerned, but you say similar lines to her and Vi, so it's not like it was foreign behavior to her.
– anyways!
– they don't like when your groupies get handsy or visibly make you uncomfortable when you're all backstage.
– some of your fans/groupies are so wrapped up in your stardom, they forget you're human.
– God, don't let your bodyguards fail at their job.
– Vi is the first one screaming that the show's over, the guards aren't doing their fucking job, and some of your fans need to learn some respect.
– Caitltyn immediately apologizes for Vi's profanity, but not for her actions of shutting things down. She glares at the guards and some of the problematic fans while ushering everyone out
– she also looks at the kind fans apologetically and hopes they get home safe.
– OKAY FINALLY. SHOWTIME (literally)
– you don't sing or play your spicy songs until near the end of the concert.
– the mood is calmer, the fans are fully engrossed in the music. and the lighting is a perfect purple/red.
– usually, the spicy songs are covers, but the moment you show up performing a BRAND NEW UNRELEASED song about the two of them? ohhh god
– first off, cait and vi are blushing. it's intense and they're so flustered but since they're in the front row and surrounded by people, they have to keep it cool.
– the moment you mention the contrast of calloused and soft hands, they glance at each other like "is this fucking play about us?!"
– yeah, babes. it is.
– if you're a singer, you look at them as you sing. you don't stare at them all the time. (you can't let the fans know this song is explicitly ab them even though they have a good hunch)
– you're holding onto the mic stand, swaying your hips to the music with your eyes closed. but then when you talk about their kisses and maybe even how they act during the act, you look at them with a little smirk
– vi smirks back, but its very faint. she's thinking, "oh this little fucker. you're not going to get away with this"
– meanwhile, Caitlyn is freaking.
– she's not really open w her "adult" life like that and even though the details are vague and you're not saying her name, she can't help but get embarrassed
– now people know her dirtiest and deepest fantasies! (aka pretty lingerie and whispers smh. you'll be okay cait)
– if you're not much of a singer, but a music player, you watch them the entire time you play.
– you added some lyrics to the song, so when the line you wrote about them comes up, you make eye contact. A sneaky smile spreads across your face and your tongue pokes at your cheek
– if the song is more upbeat, think Chase Atlantic, you headbang to some of the music.
– if the song is slower, lana del ray type shit, you sway your music and chew on your lip
– whatever you do, Caitlyn and Vi love it
– they're weak at the knees, resisting the urge to jump on stage and kiss you until your lips turn purple
– god, they think you're such a tease but they love it.
– after the show Vi walks up to you like, "well, that was some song"
– and you're "innocently" like "oh, what song? can you remind me?"
– even Caitlyn's a little smug with a tensed jaw and her tongue running along her upper teeth. she crosses her arms, Vi mimics the stance, and she tilts her head to the side. in a low, sultry whisper she goes "you know what song."
– WHEWWWWW
– butterflies, shivers, ETC. EVERYTHING YOU COULD FEEL YOU'RE FEELING
– later that night at the hotel is interesting, but I'll leave that to your imagination.
WC: 1,000
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koostarcandy · 1 year
Text
nonsense, it's l-o-v-e!
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summary: "she's a, oh my god, she's like a taylor swift song!"
pairing: student!jungkook x student!fem!reader
genre: fluff, mentions of smut, koo is a music major here hence the banner :)
wc: 1.8k
a/n: there was an anonie who wanted a song fic based on into you so i combined that and my new playlist i've been obsessed with! also im abit obsessed with writing a whipped male lead ;)) oktyilybye <3
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"are you out of your mind? it's not nausea, you fool, it's called being in love."
"love? like l-o-v-e love or what you and taehyungie hyung do everyday?"
jimin has half a mind to punch the innocent doe-eyed face infront of him, who's slightly trembling because of a text he got a few moments back. and left it on read.
"you idiot, reply to her quickly or she's gonna think you fainted again!"
jungkook scrambles for his phone, tossing aside the controller to goodness knows where. "i will see you, no, i will pick you up and we will go for boba together tomorrow. with a heart, duh." he says what he types out loud, a habit he developed along with your blossoming relationship. either his namjoon hyung would be there to correct his grammar which he would've made a ton of mistakes in his eagerness to reply to you or he would be batshit scared if he sent something which may or may not upset you, very slightly. hence why jimin is there, who is nursing his empty can of beer, wishing he had something stronger, because he doesn't remember signing up for this clownery, just for dance club.
"jungkookie?" jimin calls him sweetly, a fond expression growing on his face when he looks at his best friend's lovesick smile.
"yes, hyung? is it my hair again? i didn't put too much serum this time, right?" jungkook has registered that tone of voice in his head under the category of "uh-oh. something isn't right."
"when you and your, uh, lover move in, do you expect me to do the same with you both?"
"why are you moving? did the landlord raise the rent here too? do you want me to knock some sense into him? people are acting crazy now, don't they know broke college students actually exist?"
"no, kookie," jimin giggles, "you always need one of us around when you're doing anything remotely concerning her. like what we were talking about before, maybe you should tell her, no? save yourself the heartbreak and whatnot."
jungkook's thighs which were shaking in excitement slowly cease. he's way too familiar with that concept, always hoping and praying and wishing that isn't the case with you. he likes you too much that he can't imagine his future without you. somewhere, in his rose-tinted dreams and in a perfect house, you're growing old with him, laughing at something silly he said. in the 2 years he's known you, he was lucky enough for you to like him back, getting giddy again when he remembers you asking him on a date quietly in the middle of class, fingers intertwined with his tightly when he whispered an excited "yes!", not caring if he garnered a few concerned and judgemental looks.
"don't think about it too much, little one," jimin pats his head and pecs, throwing the can into the bin. "go home and worry about the outfit you're wearing tomorrow 'cause lord knows you've pulled all-nighters for that one."
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"you look so pretty right now, i'm actually jealous, koo."
jungkook thinks you're more beautiful and more pretty but he's too tired to argue now. the golden rays are hitting the both of you just right, golden hour living upto it's name. your warm skin against his cold one raises goosebumps, wondering if you can hear his heartbeat from the close proximity. you shift from your position on his chest to propping yourself up on your elbows, the duvet slipping from your bare shoulders.
"your hand goes down any further and i'm yeeting you out of this bed, my love." you threaten jungkook half-heartedly, referring to the wandering hand on the small of your back, inching towards your hip chain.
"you couldn't get one more out of me even if you tried your very best, darling." he says, leaning his head back on the new pillow you bought with an infatuated smile, throwing a tattooed hand over his eyes.
"is that a challenge, jeon?" you tease, fingers playing with the thing string of sliver around his neck, matching pendants with your bracelet. you let the magnetic pendants do it's job, looking at the pretty heart stuck together with a solicitous gaze. "looks adorable, doesn't it?" you praise his choice, reluctantly pulling away to place an indulgent kiss on his sternum.
you had all but jumped on him when he had come early to pick you up, in your favourite jacket and his ripped jeans, kissing him all over his face, claiming you missed his cute dumbass. that compliment ensued scattered clothes on the floor, needy lips trying to convey so many emotions fervently.
you're now tracing impatient shapes on his chest, your quickly shifting mood and pouty lips hinting that you're hungry. it's currently 2.45 pm on a sunday, but honestly, who cares? jungkook has the love of his life wrapped around him and is practically on cloud 9. he could literally-
"did you just say love of your life?"
jungkook shoots up, suddenly sitting up and looking at your blinking face, rubbing your eyes for some reason.
"what did you say?"
"i thought you were sleep talking again but it seems like it wasn't," you mumble, looking away from him. this is it, this is where the sky comes falling, pigs are flying, hell is freezing and-
"you're so annoying, i wanted to tell you that first!"
you're close to tears, frustrated for some reason. he takes in your messy hair and swollen lips, courtesy of him of course. you're glaring at him, like he just stuck his tongue out at you and he told you that he finished the last of the raspberry cheesecake in your fridge. "oh thank god," jungkook lets out a sigh of relief, strong arms pulling you to his lap and kissing your lips repeatedly. he's acting like he's come back from war, holding you so close and so tight.
"what? why would you say that? is this some big set up so you can finally ask me to move in with you so you can quote, unquote save money and electricity?" you ask, eyebrows furrowed cutely that he can't help but place the sweetest of kisses on your forehead, smoothing the creased lines.
"let's save money and electricity, i've had enough of you complaining of inflation along with jiminie hyung."
"you're just ditching your hyungie, my precious roommate, just like that?"
ah, so that's why jimin asked. so much for him being concerned about his love life. "we'll think about the technicalities later," jungkook says cheekily, chasing your lips and holding your face between his large hands.
"that's cool and all but can i get off you now? koo junior seems to want attention now."
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"you know, some of us are very painfully single here," yoongi comments, staring at jungkook over his simple lunch of kimbap and iced americano. "so, the lyrics sound good?" jungkook smiles, stealing a bite of veggie kimbap.
"you're whipped, man, you've written these lyrics in record time. the last time this happened you were crying on our shoulders, telling us you love us all so, so, so, so-"
"okay, i think the point has come across, hyung." jungkook shudders at the thought, vividly recollecting the time he got drunk with his friends for the first time, dragging them all to their shared studio so he could showcase his latest assignment.
"you must really like her alot, huh?" yoongi comments off-handedly, secretly trying out a theory that taehyung had put out. one mention of you had jungkook's irises turn into pink hearts, his hands quickly taking his phone to show pictures of your latest date.
"i'm sure like is a understatement at this point, hyung," the said whipped man says sagely, like he's preaching to an attentive crowd of 100.
"oh god, here we go-"
an elmo-like laugh resonates in the small spaced studio, jungkook anyway going on a joyful rant about you. it can be seen in his lyrics, the way his eyes light up like you're his most precious person (and you are, no doubt), how he sincerely writes love poems for you and how he loves seeing your face light up when it shows randomly in one of your notebooks, happily tucking it away in a file you've saved especially for his letters.
"its like I can finally relate to those poems namjoon hyung reads to us sometimes you know?"
"mhmm.."
"and every one of iu's love songs is suddenly right and the universe finally makes sense and-"
"uh huh?"
"she's like a, oh my god, she's like a taylor swift song!"
"wow."
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"whatcha upto, handsome? too busy to spare some time for your hungry roommate?"
jungkook glances at the time from the digital clock, glaring 12.30 am. he stretches and breaks his finger knuckles, legs moving towards you on a mind of it's own. you're wearing one of his many oversized shirts, a white one this time, big but it seems to fit you just right.
"why are you still up, baby?" he asks, arms around you immediately. "i'm hungry, koo," you say again, "was waiting for you so we can order some snacks and watch hotel del luna again," you mumble against his chest, your hands rubbing his tense back. "let's go then," he grabs his phone and throws you over his shoulder effortlessly, nonchalantly saying it's been awhile since you've had spicy tteokbokki and bingsu. you stumble when he puts you down, unfazed when you're voicing out that you both can't eat spicy food at night anymore, as if the last time that happened wasn't scarring enough.
you kiss his cheek, reminding him to save his work and that you'll get everything ready in a jiffy. jungkook all but zooms to the bedroom, already eager to get back to you. he chuckles at the title on his screen, knowing that "nonsense, it's l-o-v-e!" is going to be the best birthday gift you've ever gotten.
he finds you sipping away on a cranberry breezer, can of chilled beer waiting for him. your eyes are enraptured by jang manwol and her beauty, instinctively leaning on him when he's settled next to you.
it's like a satisfying puzzle, feeling all the pieces click easy when he's with you. in your shared abode, huddled up and in your own cosy bubble, away from the world. hands easily finding their way around your bodies. synchronized laughing at a clever comment passed by the male lead. jungkook feels like this is one of those moments he would write about in a song later or write in one of your weekly love letters. you're the definition of right person at the right time, knowing that if you both were in a rundown apartment or in one of the biggest bungalows ever, you'll still love him the same.
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pt time: @armys-dna ; @junsai-tree ; @soobhyun ; @shatzkrinslinzki ; @astronaut-jin-moon ; @cherishoshi ; @fragmentof-indifference
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999 notes · View notes
imyourrjoy · 10 months
Text
Hop,Hop,Hop
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Summary: Flirting with Draco was not the best idea, especially when you're dating Bellatrix Lestrage.
Warnings : DOM/SUB , bratty reader, eating out , dildos, mean bella, striping, overstimulation, kinda age gap (let me know if anything was forgotten)
Word count : I'm not sure
Pariring : Bellatrix Lestrange x Afab!reader
A/n : My old account got taken down, but this is one of my favorite fics I've ever written ,so please enjoy. Feedback is always welcome, but keep in mind I am dyslexic.
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The death eater meetings where alway long and boring but Bella insisted i sit in on them with her it was a rule almost, this meeting was proticulary unfun all it was a stuttering Peter Pettigrew trying to explain the plain for the next attack only when Draco walked in did I get a rather fun idea. I was only a few years older than Draco, and he always had a fancy for me, even in Hogwarts. Seeing as the seat next to me was empty, he sat down.`Sorry, I was late, " he spoke. Peter just continued. I felt Bella, who was on the opposite side of me, putting in her hand on my knee. I looked over at Draco with playful eyes as I thought of what my plan was going to be. "Bellatrix the da-rk lord has a m-m-message for you , if y-you would follow me" Peter stuttering had become music to my ears before Bella left she placed a kiss on my cheek and whispered "I see those playful eyes,don't be bad while I'm gone baby". 
My gosh, I was so bad the whole time Bella was gone. I was flirting a storm with Malfoy. "You know your eyes are so blue it's stunning," I spoke dumbly, caressing his cheeks with my palm ,draco blushed. That's when I say bella enter back into the 
room i quickly left Draco running over to her, I gave her a hug but she held me for a moment "I see you didn't listen draco looks like a tomato,and you are in for a treat tonight" she spoke placing a kiss on my cheek.
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Night time couldn't come sooner. My attipation was so high I didn't like punishments but I loved how much attention Bella would give me.she walked into the bedroom finally i got up to greet her but she grabbed my hair."Oh no, bunny, no touching," she chuckled, pushing me to the ground. She let go of my hair and walked into the closet.once she came back out, she held a scary sight, a big dildo bigger than the other we have. It must be new. And no lube in sight my head was spinning, staring at the big purple dildo as my mouth watered."Aw baby, do you like your present?" She laughed again. I nodded to her amusement. She put the dildo down on the ground, and it was sticking to the hard cold floor."Now, now bunny, you are wearing far too many clothes." she came up to me and started ripping off my clothing. I gasped at the feeling of her ripping my dress clean off, leaving me in my bra and panties. "Oo, looks like I'm the overdressed one now." Bella looked at me as she slowly and teasingly took off her clothes, leaving her the sexiest lingerie I've ever seen. I gasped, seeing how the lingerie hugged her figure, making sure to show off her bosoms. I wanted to touch but remembered her words to me."Now, if you do as I say, you will be in for an almost bearable night. If not, well, let's hope that doesn't happen," she continued as he walked behind me. I felt my bra slip off of me down my arms to the floor, I felt her palms slowly move closer towards my boobs as she placed kisses along my shoulder as I whimpered into her touch. As she slowly caressed my boobs."Now bunny, I want you to lie down while I sit on your face, alright, my little baby." I was so eager. I just nodded, but she stopped my nodding by grabbing my chin. "I need words." Those words washed over me as i looked in her eyes "yes mommy".
I lay on the bed as Bella slowly made her way up towards me, leaving small kisses as she made her way to my boobs leaving small love bites before stealing my face. One part of the lingerie that I liked was that it was crochless as soon as she lowered herself on me, I licked a long strip against her fold she tasted like heaven. The more I licked and moved, the more sounds started escaping her mouth. I moved my tongue as fast as I could, wanting to see what else she would sound like "my little girl is so good" she said as I started sucking softly on her clit. She started shaking on top of me signaling that she was close I sucked as hard as I could only breathing when licking. I felt her release on to my tongue as she let out a loud moan I made sure to such up as much of her juices as I could. I could feel my chin it had her juices all over I didn't care.she soon got off of me and swiped the juices away kissing my lips softly "I hate to punish you but after what you pulled with draco even your amazing mouth can't help you" she said with remorse as she walked towards the dildo.
"Don't just lay there bunny, come on after all bunnies bounce," she let out a chuckle as she sat on a chair placed near the dildo. I slowly walked towards her, still intimidated by the size still."Bunny, come close," bella patted her lap, I sat down on her thigh as she kissed my collar as small sounds escaped my mouth. "Now bunny take off those lovely panty's and hop,hop,hop," she signaled towards the dildo. I took off my panties as she watched me. I was intimidated, but I was excited as well. I started to straddle the dildo I was wet enough to ease the tip in, but Bella was good at punishment in that way.the way of pain and pleasure. I moved it in and out, trying to stretch out more and make the toy wetter.``do you need help then" Bella asked not satisfied with my slow movements,she walked over to me put her hand on my hips making me sink onto the dildo farther.tears started falling softly as well as whimpers as I tried to adjust.she made me go down to the base I felt the dildo hit my cervix making me cry out."That wasn't that hard, was it?" she mocked. I started to move pain slowly started fading though the stretch was something to get used to the pleaser was new.the toy hit all the right spots, and the spots only bella made me feel."m-mommy,``I moaned out loudly."Yes baby," she responded, grabbing my hair so I could look back at her."it's so much,"I whinied incoherently. I cpuntinied bouncing  on the didldo as Bella placed rough kisses on my lips. She put her hands on my hips and started moving me faster. I moaned at the contact, feeling my high approach,"mo-omy I'm cl-ose." I whimpered into our kiss. Bella licked her lips and started moving me faster as my moans got louder. My orgasum was aproting fast as Bella moved my hips faster, not slowly down at all. I yelled out "mommy" as I felt my high wash over me, I clenched around the toy as bellas movements didn't stop the overstimulation washing over me. "I didn't say you could stop," she said, pulling my hair.
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After my third orgasum, I was a puddle before her. The sounds were uncontrollable; anyone who passed by our door may have thought a minder was taking place." One more baby, then where done?" I bella softly kissed my cheek, and I bounced up and down.it wasn't long before the familiar feeling came back. I sped up chasing one last high. Once it hit, I let out a loud whine.bella kissed me as she told me I was a good girl and what felt like a million times.
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Me and Bella sat in the warm bath as she held me close, placing gentle kisses to my face."Now, don't ever talk to malfoy, or your legs won't just wobble," she warned. "Yes, mommy," I replied as I let my head rest against her shoulder, slowly drifting to sleep.
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Go get some holy water and have an amazing day. I love you 🫶🏻🫶🏻
~Joy
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britcision · 11 months
Text
OKAY FRIENDOS
This chapter fucking fought me, not least because I wasn’t actually sure what exactly Danny wanted out of meeting Waylon… and then I realised that was because Danny wasn’t sure either
I did consider just letting this one run long and posting in two parts when all was said and done, but this was where I’d have had to break the chapter in two for Tumblr anyway, and it’s actually a really good place to end… so one more chapter for Waylon!
And then tumblr mobile decided not to let me fucking paste the chapter in, and I am fucking DYING with the laggy piece of shit that is the mobile website. I crave death. Let me join the boys.
First Chapter and AO3:
Previous Chapter:
——————
A Good Excuse To Be A Bad Influence 
Jason wasn’t exactly expecting to roll up to Danny’s dorm to thumping stripper music, and yet as he turned off the bike… that was definitely what was happening. 
Flicking the visor up, he soon caught sight of the cause, a visibly frazzled Danny hurrying over. His pocket seemed to be having an independent party that Danny himself was not invited to. 
“I have sinned against the almighty Tucker and am being punished for my crimes with an endless loop,” he explained flatly without being asked. 
Jason snorted, reaching back to unhook the new helmet from the back of the bike and hand it out. 
“Oh? And what did you do to upset his highness?” He teased, a smile tugging across his lips in spite of himself. 
In spite of the certain knowledge that Tim would absolutely be latching onto this form of punishment the second he found out. 
He’d not really felt like smiling since he got in last night, yet the second he saw Danny his anger eased. 
Didn’t hurt that the pit was practically vibrating in smug satisfaction, clearly appeased that he also wouldn’t let them be kept apart. But there was still an open happiness all Jason’s own in watching his new friend suffer. 
Danny sighed, pulling out a heavily wrapped sock-sausage that eventually contained his phone, and scrolled to show Jason some messages. 
Jason scanned through them quickly, because the music was fucking loud entirely unmuffled, then passed the phone back to be reburied. 
“You knew what you were doing,” he told Danny entirely unsympathetically, and Danny snickered. 
“Sometimes he needs to be told when he’s being a dramatic bitch. So were you there for the whole,” he waved a hand vaguely, the other stuffing his phone back into his pocket. 
Which meant Jason had to think about the cave again. And the phone call he’d gotten an hour after ignoring Bruce’s summons. 
:::
Jason was actually on his way to bed on time for once in his life, the early end to patrol and lack of crime lord duties giving him a chance to get a full five hours sleep. 
He should have known he wouldn’t get lucky two nights in a row; Constantine wasn’t around to distract Bruce anymore. 
He’d contemplated not answering. Contemplated trying not to shoot Bruce in half an hour if the fucker showed up at his window. 
The pit growled. 
It was the worst thing he’d ever heard. The worst thing he’d ever felt. And he did feel it, vibrating in his very bones. 
It sent shivers creeping up and down his spine, muscles tensing as if to run away from something inside him. 
He answered the call, hoping it wouldn’t show in his voice. 
“What.” Flat, unfriendly. Not encouraging conversation. 
“You didn’t come to the cave.” B’s voice was equally flat, but in his case it sounded like a condemnation. An accusation. 
Jason gritted his teeth. 
“I have shit to do in the morning. Make it quick,” he snapped, giving his bed a glare it definitely didn’t deserve. 
His pillows had never done anything to hurt him. 
There was a momentary pause before B audibly decided not to push it. 
Good. 
Jason was in a mood to bite. 
“We have intel on the Infinite Realms. I’ve sent the report. You need to stay away from Danny Fenton, for your health,” B said, still cold, still clinical. 
Like he didn’t care. Like what Jason wanted didn’t matter. 
Jason’s grip tightened and the phone case cracked. 
“Yeah, no. Fuck off.” He spat the words, adding “get new phone” to his list of chores for the morning. 
He’d been doing so well with this one. Of course B had to ruin it. 
At least the old man didn’t seem surprised by his reaction. 
“Jason. It… he. His abilities may affect your condition,” he said slowly, sounding tired. Old. 
The pit snarled, sensing weakness, and Jason kinda wished he was still lost in its rage. Back when he was, it was easy just to hate those moments. 
B showing signs of humanity fucking hurt. 
“He is. He’s making it better,” he shot back, brooking no argument. 
“We don’t know that, Jason. Please, just… just for a few days. Until we can talk to the League, understand what he’s doing to you.” 
Was. 
Was that Bruce begging? 
It froze something small and soft in Jason’s chest, stuck him in place. And did nothing to stop the flood of icy rage from filling him up. 
Filling his chest, crushing his lungs, making it hard to breathe. Because of course, anyone and everyone else’s judgement was worth more to the man than Jason’s. 
Begging Jason to listen to him, when he would never, ever, fucking ever listen to Jason. When it didn’t fucking matter if Jason begged. 
“And why the fuck would the League know better than a doctor from the Realms?” He finally snapped, ignoring the way his throat tightened. 
There was a long silence. 
“A doctor?” Bruce asked softly, his voice still so flat and emotionless that only his kids could have read the confusion. Jason rolled his eyes. 
“Danny brought me to a doctor. I’m gonna be fine,” he ground out reluctantly, part of him resenting Bruce’s constant insistence on knowing everything. 
But… well. If it got the guy off his fucking back. 
There was a long silence, one that Jason was fully aware B was likely spending working this new information into his latest paranoid fantasy. 
Jason seriously considered just hanging up and going to bed. He was about to do it when Bruce spoke again. 
“Would this doctor be willing to speak to the League?” And there it was again, Batman voice, clinical and distant and always, always fucking suspicious. 
Jason rolled his eyes harder. With emphasis. Willing to be interrogated by first the Justice League and then separately also goddamn Batman. 
Actually, now that he thought about it, he was pretty sure B wouldn’t get anywhere with Frostbite. Frostbite took his work seriously and was, yeah, king of a full realm of yetis. 
None of Bruce’s pointed silences, menacing looming, or vague growls would bug the guy who got Danny through Fucked Up Ghost Puberty. 
(And would probably be helping Jason through his own Fucked Up Ghost Puberty… joy of joys.) 
It might actually be fun to see him try. If just being here wouldn’t put Frostbite in danger, because hell fucking no that wasn’t happening. The guy may not be his king but Jason would still die first.
But of course, in all his paranoid bullshit about the Realms influencing Gotham, B had somehow conveniently missed what America was doing to the Realms. 
Like Jason hadn’t even done the full write up. 
“Not while the fucking League are required to hand him right to the US government for torture and experimentation. Which, by the way, did you read my report on the Anti Ecto Acts?” Jason asked sarcastically, doing his very worst fake concern. 
And again he was met with silence. Fuck, maybe Bruce hadn’t read it. Jason had dropped it in the day before all this gala bullshit had started, and it had been a busy two days since. 
Maybe B deadass hadn’t put the pieces together.  Might as well hammer it home for him. 
“You know, the one that says you, me, Cass, and Damian are all non-sentient because we’ve been exposed to the pits?” Jason added, eyes narrowing. 
Which wasn’t technically true, since it was the resulting liminality and ability to process ectoplasm that made them count, but Bruce didn’t need to know that yet. 
Finally he spoke again, voice gruff and clipped. 
“I’m looking into it. But for now, Jason, please-” he said again, the cover of Batman beginning to slip. 
But Jason was done. No fucking chance Bruce was giving him orders when he hadn’t even bothered asking for Jason’s opinion. 
He wanted to spout off about dangers of the Infinite Realms after talking to some wet paper bag of a man who hawked his soul like it was a pokemon card. Hard pass. 
And even after hearing that Jason knew what was going on a damn sight better than Bruce did, he still wanted to push him around? 
Fuck that. 
“Sorry B, legally non-sentient, guess I can’t be blamed for my actions,” he drawled, then turned his phone off and dropped into bed. 
He had a lot of shit to do before picking Danny up in the morning. 
:::
Jason shook his head, partially to clear it but also in answer to Danny’s question. 
“Hell no. Tim told me he was being a paranoid old fuck again so I went to bed,” he growled, a little surprised by the sudden rush of anger the memory brought. 
It must have been strong enough that Danny noticed it, because he could feel Danny’s worry too. 
He sucked in a sharp breath, pushing the anger back down. He still hadn’t turned his phone back on. 
Actually it might still be beside the bed in his apartment. It didn’t really matter. 
Danny took the new helmet from him, leaning up against Jason’s side in a soft wave of comfort-sorry-amused. 
Amused? 
Before he could ask, Danny had turned the helmet over to look at the visor. 
“So I’m guessing, from what we talked about in the car, what Tucker told me, and what you’re not telling me, that Bruce thinks you should be far, far away from me?” He asked innocently. 
The pit fucking growled again, raising the hair all along Jason’s neck, and Danny trilled soothingly to it. 
Even knowing what to expect, the sudden and complete lack of rage still made Jason shiver. 
“Thanks,” he said before Danny could apologise. 
For managing Jason’s unstable emotions for him when Jason couldn’t. Although… 
If they actually were the pit’s all along, that’d explain why it had been so hard to push through. It was weird that the idea was actually starting to feel comforting. 
Danny gave him a slightly relieved grin, nudging back. 
“Yeah, well, not like you recently bound your entire soul and afterlife into keeping me safe. Not like either of us know what the fuck that’s gonna mean,” he said, all flippant and glib, and… 
Yeah, he’d almost have a point, except Jason had put himself on the chopping block to keep others safe since he was thirteen years old. 
He shook his head, chuckling softly. 
“Oh, I didn’t get on with the old man long, long before you came into the picture,” he assured Danny with a dry smile, rolling his eyes. 
Danny snickered, spinning the helmet and looking “innocently” up to the sky. Whatever the fuck came out of his mouth next, Jason was ready for it to be a doozy. 
“Yeah, well… if I’m the bad influence boyfriend your dad wants you to stay away from…” and that sentence alone almost made Jason choke, without even the kicker, “can I drive your motorcycle?” 
At least it stopped Jason from coughing. He shot Danny a sudden suspicious glare. 
“Do you even know how to drive a motorcycle?” He asked with a full awareness of what the answer would be. 
Danny shrugged, giving Jason his best “innocent” smile. 
“Definitely motorcycle adjacent?” He offered sweetly. Jason shook his head firmly. 
“Nope.” 
“Oh come on!” Danny pouted, tossing both hands into the air, his new helmet held tight despite the dramatic gesture. 
Jason shook his head again, in case Danny had missed the point. 
“Nnnnnnnope,” he drew the word out, popping the p, and Danny rolled his eyes at him. 
“It’s not like a crash would kill either of us anyway,” he huffed, and while he may have that kind of confidence in his ghost powers, Jason’s core hadn’t formed yet. 
He wasn’t about to fucking risk it. 
“That doesn’t mean it’ll be a fun experience. They’re called “donor-cycles” for a reason,” he told Danny archly, definitely not moving from astride his girl while this was “up for debate”. 
Glanced back to find Danny staring at him, clearly holding back a snicker. 
“That sounds waaay more like something the Disapproving Dad Who Doesn’t Like His Son’s Hot New Motorcycle Boyfriend would say,” he pointed out, rising on tiptoe to rest his chin on Jason’s shoulder. 
Jason licked him. Mostly on the cheek. 
It was a stupid impulse, the kind he usually didn’t even get with anyone but Dick, and he might have regretted it immediately if it hadn’t fucking worked. 
Danny jumped back, cheeks flushing, and while Jason was pretty sure his own had pinked up, well, behind him Danny couldn’t see that. 
But he pulled on his helmet just to be doubly sure. 
“Yeah, well, protecting your ass includes not letting you kill us both in a fiery wreck. Or maim us,” he added before Danny could voice the protest Jason could clearly taste. 
Silence from behind him, and then Danny sighed and pulled his helmet on, climbing aboard behind Jason again. Who decided to throw him a bone. 
“I’ll teach you how to drive it first,” he promised, and Danny cheered loudly, thrusting both fists into the air as they pulled out. 
Neither really noticed that Danny’s background music had changed to Radar Love. 
** 
When they’d finally dragged themselves to bed, Tim had offered to let Tucker use one of the manor’s nearly infinite guest rooms. 
They’d picked one out and everything, changed into pyjamas (Tucker borrowed an old pair of Dick’s), and sat on the bed in Tim’s old room talking about technology until they both fell asleep. 
Probably around 8am. 
Tucker hadn’t had a proper slumber party since leaving Amity Park, but he was kinda getting used to waking up tucked next to a still-sleeping Wayne adoptee when his phone buzzed around 10am. 
Foul treachery from Danny. As usual. 
Tucker barely woke up, hand crawling from the pile to rest against the PDA, and that was all he needed. His awareness slipped from the device to his phone, always linked. 
From his phone to Danny’s. Into Danny’s music app, where he picked a suitable vengeance even as he slipped back into sleep. 
Watched Danny through the phone as if it were a dream, easily filtering out the sounds of his own music as Danny flailed around, trying to turn the music off, trying to turn the music down, failing on all counts, and flailing his way out of the dorm. 
Down to meet Jason, his phone now buried in six layers of socks that did nothing to stop the music from being heard, or Tucker from watching. 
Tucker cranked the volume a little more anyway. The thought had to count for something. 
If Danny wanted to call him petty, well, Tucker Foley could redefine “petty” all on his own. 
Providing his friends with a semi-mocking soundtrack really was the least of his abilities; he was literally doing it in his sleep. 
**
Honestly, driving in Gotham wasn’t even all that exciting from Danny’s perspective. After being tossed around the GAV despite the seatbelts, a couple of cranky fellow drivers just didn’t register. 
If they hadn’t been going through the city, maybe going highway speeds it might have been different, but he’d kind of worked out how loud he had to be to be heard. 
By Jason snickering when he screamed at pedestrians. 
If they didn’t want to be screamed at they shouldn’t be trying to loom menacingly. 
Of course, that just meant now was the perfect time for him to use his new power for evil. Danny flipped his visor up, straining as high as he could to yell to Jason. 
“SO, THAT CONSTANTINE GUY?”
There was a sudden click in his ear and he jumped as Jason’s voice came through, quiet and definitely amused. 
“There’s a radio in your helmet, Danny.” 
Oh. 
News to fucking him, he was pretty sure that wasn’t standard in motorcycle helmets, but not from any lived experience. Johnny 13’s dead experiences were a little out of date. 
Poking around the sides of his helmet, Danny soon found a button. 
“Sweet. Looks like you finally forgot to mention something,” he teased, and heard Jason snort loud and clear. 
Didn’t have to hold the button to talk then. Good times. He’d get Tucker to take a look on the way home after he ecto infused it. For now he flipped the visor back down. 
“Looks like,” Jason agreed dryly, swerving them around a cluster of traffic. 
He wasn’t exactly sticking to the letter of the law, they were definitely half again over the speed limit, but they hadn’t gone on a sidewalk so it was nothing to a Fenton. There was even an empty slot in the lane he merged into. 
“So what about Constantine,” he prompted, and while it broke Danny out of his musings, it also reminded him of the exact thing he’d planned to do to make the trip more interesting. 
“Oh, I own his soul. Like, a dozen times over,” Danny chirped perkily, grip tightening just before Jason had to slam on the breaks to keep from hitting the car beside them. 
They sped off again before the sudden swerve caused comment, and passed a block or two in silence. Then Jason sighed. 
“Of fucking course you do that for everything and not just Mariokart.” He mostly sounded resigned, so Danny allowed himself a snicker. 
“What, it’s not like we’re gonna die. You’re even still on the road,” he dismissed easily, waving a hand to show just how unconcerned he was. 
Did not expect Jason to huff, reach back and grab his hand, and pull it back around himself. 
“I’m reconsidering teaching you to drive,” he told Danny flatly, and Danny pouted but took the hint and held on. 
“Oh come on, you can’t say that, you haven’t even seen me try!” Danny protested. 
Jason made an unimpressed noise. 
“Your town’s weather includes reports of if your parents will be on the road.” 
Which, by the way, was totally unfair of him, since he’d never have known that if Danny hadn’t told him. Or Tucker hadn’t told Tim. 
Same difference. 
“My parents, not me,” Danny argued anyway, shrugging, “and it wasn’t their driving that killed me.” 
This time he was close enough, snugged tight to Jason’s back, that he felt the guy’s whole body shiver with a loud and rumbling growl. The same growl he’d heard and soothed earlier. 
Something had really riled up Jason’s pit ghost. 
Danny hummed another quick soothing trill, stroking his aura gently across Jason and his extra passenger. 
Sort of trying to do it unobtrusively; he would actually really prefer that they didn’t fully crash. It kinda worked, in that Jason managed to unlock suddenly solid muscles enough for them to make the next turn. 
“Sorry,” Danny said quickly, kind of to both of them, “guess Pitty doesn’t like the death jokes today.” 
They passed another few buildings in silence, and Danny had definitely noticed by now that they weren’t heading for the manor. Didn’t matter so long as Jason knew where they were going. 
Danny waited him out, long enough that he almost wanted to make another joke and lighten the mood. Again though, Jason broke it first. 
“Pitty.” He did not sound impressed. But he didn’t feel mad. More what the fuck just came outta your mouth. 
Danny gave him a quick squeeze, and almost felt the pit purr. 
It was kinda getting stronger the longer they hung out. Technically that probably meant that both cores were making progress. 
“Well, technically you probably get to name it, but until you come up with something I’m calling it Pitty,” Danny explained, and rather felt that Jason should be grateful. 
Unlike the rest of his family, Jason had seen the full list of how Jack Fenton named things. Danny preferred to think he took after his aunt. 
He coulda called it the Fenton Pit Friend or something. Really, it wasn’t hard to think of anything worse. 
From his aura, Jason now seemed to be intentionally ignoring him. 
Stewing in indignation-disbelief-confused-confused-confused. Well, that was his call. 
Anyway. 
“Back to Constantine though, I wasn’t kidding. I do actually own his soul,” Danny said casually, since they’d gotten distracted from his previous attempt to make the drive more interesting. 
For a moment he wasn’t sure if Jason would rise to the bait this time either, and then another sigh came over the radio. 
“Y’know, somehow, that’s the least surprising thing you’ve said. Man sells his soul so much everyone seems to have a chunk,” Jason grumbled, and Danny snickered. 
“Oh, pretty much. He’s the Caterpie of human souls. He never made a deal with me directly though,” he added quickly, without being fully sure why. 
He was pretty sure Jason wouldn’t jump straight to “Danny is a soul trader”, but honestly he’d gotten used to getting ahead of wilder trains of thought. 
“Oh? How’d you get twelve then?” Jason shot back, clearly warming back up to things. 
Mission accomplished. Danny grinned. 
“Well, previous Ghost King was in nappy time for a couple thousand years, but he had this whole thing about collecting souls to add to his army of thralls, so basically anyone could sign their soul over for a chunk of power. Real charmer,” Danny snorted, rolling his eyes. 
It was so far from the worst thing Pariah Dark had ever done, but so far it was definitely the longest lingering annoyance. 
“I got the impression,” Jason agreed in pretty much the same tone, prompting Danny to continue. 
Which. Yeah. Was more fun than thinking about the mountain of thrall contracts still awaiting their owner’s deaths, which the Observants were still fussing over. 
Nobody wanted more thralls, souls wiped clean of everything that made them, well, souls. Just unliving batteries. Even ghosts found them creepy. 
On the other hand, there was nothing the Observants loved more than rules. And the rules said a signed contract had to be honoured. 
Really they shoulda expected Danny to ask who the fuck signed for Pariah, since he was (again) in nappy time prison. He hoped nobody else died while they sorted that out. 
“Danny?” 
Ah. Yup, he did it again. Danny shook his head and sighed, kinda missing the wind in his hair. It kept him more present than the enclosed space of the helmet. 
“Sorry. So, John Constantine, clever bitch, wrote himself a contract that signed his soul over to the Ghost King, not Pariah Dark. Got through whatever screening was in place no problem, and now he’s my problem.” 
A problem that Clockwork had presented Danny with on his fucking birthday no less. 
That had been part one of the soul screening process; who was stuck with Pariah by name, and ho boy that was a depressingly long list… and still growing, though it had slowed recently. 
News of Pariah losing his crown was slow to spread, and frankly Danny himself could be doing more to help that, except. Well. 
Not taking the damn crown himself until he had to. Not wanting to give the creeps of the world anything to call him. 
There were a lot of good reasons, okay? And Clockwork had specially singled out Constantine’s contract and delivered it to Danny himself as a birthday present. 
“Well, that explains one,” Jason agreed with a snicker, pulling to a stop in front of the police station, “but what about the other eleven times?” 
Danny snorted a laugh, sliding off the bike and stretching. As much fun as hugging Jason at high speeds was, he didn’t like being still for too long. 
“Tax season,” he explained cheerfully, pulling off the helmet and looking around, “I guess we’re meeting Harley here?” 
Snickering to himself, Jason pulled off his own helmet and tucked it into the storage on the back of his bike. Danny passed it over, noting that Jason had also had to get a second little pod for the other helmet. 
He wasn’t gonna ask. Maybe they were in storage? 
“Yeah, we’re meeting Harley here. Better not to swing by the manor for a while,” Jason added, his expression souring. 
Which did make Danny feel a little bad actually. He didn’t want to cause trouble for Jason with his family… 
But before he could say anything Jason ruffled his hair roughly, shaking his head. 
“It’s not your fault, Danny. This kinda shit happens every other week, Bruce gets on his bullshit and I steer clear. He’ll calm the fuck down eventually and remember to mind his own business,” he explained dryly, nodding towards the doors. 
Danny hesitated before moving to follow. It felt true, he could feel Jason’s sincere-exhausted-familiar-still over it clear as day, it just. 
“I’m still sorry I wound him up though,” Danny finally decided, heading after Jason up and in. Jason who rolled his eyes and held the door open. 
“Danny. He winds himself up. You could be a literal angel and he would not fucking care. You couldn’t unwind him even if you miraculously found the key. We’ve all tried,” Jason said with a sigh, though at least the anger seemed to have burned off into just… 
Tired. 
Jason just felt tired. 
Probably cuz he was off fucking around with Cass last night, but Danny wasn’t about to call him out on it. 
Not when they’d just walked into the police station (ew) and the wild sight of Harley Quinn, hair in pigtails and dressed in her signature red and black, sat on the duty officer’s desk with a bat. Filing her nails. 
Total silence filled the room, broken only by the swing of the doors opening as Danny and Jason stepped through. 
The whole room was watching her in a kind of terrified awe, like she was a particularly dangerous bomb waiting to go off. Danny’d swear they weren’t even breathing. 
She looked up as the door opened, grinning broadly at the sight of them and waving in a large, exuberant gesture. 
“Oh, there’s my boys! Hey boys!” She called in obvious delight, and half the room flinched. 
Didn’t seem to matter that she hadn’t even been in Gotham for ages, let alone being her former roguish self. She had the kind of presence that left a lasting impression. 
No wonder Danny liked her. She coulda fit right in with his ghost friends. 
Maybe she’d come join them for fight club. 
** 
Pulling himself slowly from sleep just a little past noon, Bruce had to admit he was feeling better. The headache had dulled to a low throb but he felt clearer. 
More aware of himself, and after a glass of water, more like he could take on the day. 
It was far from his first concussion and he was well used to navigating the symptoms over the next few days. So long as he didn’t get any serious memory loss he wasn’t going to worry about it. 
He had far more serious things to worry about, but even they seemed more manageable after almost nine hours of sleep. 
Honestly… he wasn’t surprised that Jason hadn’t come to the cave. Hadn’t agreed to stay away from Danny when asked.  
It had felt like a reasonable request at the time, like the bare minimum of common sense. But they didn’t have that kind of relationship anymore. 
Jason didn’t trust him. Didn’t trust Bruce’s judgement, in how to deal with criminals or anything else. 
Jason hadn’t been the boy who’d looked to Bruce with such trust, such wonder and awe, even before he’d died. 
Sometimes Bruce wondered where he’d gone wrong. 
But there was no use dwelling on the past. Bruce would like to re earn Jason’s trust some day, but he wouldn’t ignore their present relationship. 
Jason wouldn’t trust that Danny was a danger to him without proof, so Bruce would find that proof, if it existed. Hopefully before Jason’s condition became proof itself. 
The first and most obvious step would be to consult the Justice League Dark at today’s meeting, and then make arrangements for this doctor from the Infinite Realms. 
He’d have to look into those laws Jason mentioned ahead of the meeting. Perhaps bring them up to Constantine, see how it might affect matters with the Infinite Realms. 
A bitter part of him mused that he wouldn’t be surprised if the magician was completely unaware of most international laws, let alone the ones of the various lands he travelled, but still. 
The man had been so adamant that the Infinite Realms were completely beyond their ability to handle. That they should cut and run at any cost. 
Bruce could hardly imagine he’d be pleased that the US had apparently declared its inhabitants the targets of its newest genocide. 
Of course, changing the laws and having them struck down would take time, but Bruce still hoped that the act of beginning might be enough. 
Enough for him to visit Jason’s doctor in the Realms or some other neutral ground, since the doctor couldn’t come here. 
Jason had said that he would be fine, not that he was already fine. Bruce wouldn’t have believed him if he had, not really; Jason hadn’t been fine since he’d been dunked in those damn pits. 
Their poison had stuck with him far longer than anyone Bruce had ever heard of. 
Hells, Bruce had had his own dunking. He could just barely remember the rage that had forced itself down his throat, into his lungs as he was brutally thrust back into the land of the living. 
He had controlled it, had mastered it quickly, and now it was nothing more than a faint scrap of memory. Even that was still enough to grant his deepest sympathy to Jason’s struggles. 
If the rage had never left him… 
But no, he decided, going through his morning routine like he was still the young playboy Brucie who never showed his face before 3pm. 
There was no point in indulging those thoughts either. He had mastered the pit’s fury, and it released him. For whatever reason, Jason hadn’t. 
And now they all had to deal with the consequences. 
Still, Bruce let himself hope for the future instead. 
If his children were right, if Jason was right… if Danny or this mysterious doctor from the Infinite Realms could help him with the pit rage… 
He might one day see that little boy again. The boy who looked at Bruce like he’d hung the stars, who could fly because Robin made him magic. 
There was nothing in this world or any other that Bruce wouldn’t give to see Jason whole again. To see him happy. 
The United States government were going to learn (again) what it meant to come between the Batman and the safety of his sons. 
The Justice League’s meeting would be in another four hours. He had plenty of time to do some research and amend their presentation. 
So long as Jason was right. 
And speaking of Jason… there was just one other thing he’d like to do this morning. Heaving a sigh while he had the privacy of his room, Bruce pulled up his phone again. 
He didn’t quite indulge himself as far as making a face as he punched in Constantine’s number, because concussed or not he was an adult. And he was going to need the man’s help. 
Surely Jason wouldn’t object to a single check in with a trusted practitioner? 
As the phone rang, Bruce once again cursed the circumstances that kept Zatanna off world. He was about 75% sure that Jason actually liked her. 
But maybe the extent to which Constantine annoyed Bruce would also cheer him up. 
The call went through, and Bruce snapped his wandering attention back. Maybe he’d take the rest of the day off after the meeting. Heal up a little more. 
Alfred would be proud. 
“Constantine. A moment of your time before the meeting?” It even sounded like a question, not a command. Sleep really had done him a world of good. 
**
Part of Jason wished he could say he was surprised that Harley had taken GCPD HQ hostage just by showing up, but he honestly wasn’t. 
Part of him wished he didn’t think that was exactly her intention, but… he didn’t particularly like lying to himself. Harley was fun. 
And got results, even if she also tended not to end lives. He could respect that. 
And promised not to rat him out to Danny, even if she made no promises about Waylon, who definitely also knew both his identities. 
That… Jason wasn’t really surprised by that either. They’d never talked about it, but Waylon had definitely known he was the second Robin for some time. 
A few of the rogues did, or at least assumed as much from the way the Batman would either obsessively chase or obsessively avoid him in mask. 
Jason personally preferred and egged on the side that thought Red Hood was Batman’s evil twin brother. Or clone. Mostly because Bruce hated them. 
Knowing civilian identities was a step beyond that Bruce would certainly never admit that more than one or two knew, but Jason had (slightly) less issues. 
It was kinda an open secret among the rogues who’d been around since the glory days; Bruce Wayne is Batman. As Danny so rightly said of Dick, the butts matched. 
(Jason was considering adding more padding to the body armour in his pants, if only to change the silhouette, because that was a fucked yet accurate identifier apparently.) 
Most of the rogues didn’t fucking care, Joker and Two Face especially, but it was something that no one talked about. 
And that they all specifically agreed to keep from Riddler for as long as possible. 
(It was his punishment for being obnoxious at trivia nights in Arkham; no one bothered to suggest banning him or asking him to behave.) 
For rogues like the Gotham City Sirens? Hadn’t been a secret since Bruce took off the mask for Selina. 
Killer Croc probably wasn’t technically one of the sirens yet (and wouldn’t that be fun?) but he hung out with Harley, and despite his size he wasn’t stupid. 
The only thing Jason was a little worried about was Waylon mentioning his current alter ego in front of Danny, but honestly the fact that they were at a police station would probably keep his lips closed. 
All vigilantes were illegal. 
Red Hood was illegal and a serial killer. 
And probably couldn’t get the silent and terrified reverence Harley currently held over the station even if he walked in with a rocket launcher. 
She beamed at them, hopping down off the desk with her bat over her shoulder. A little closer, Jason noted that this bat was also bedazzled, but in a different pattern from the one she’d had last night. 
Or the same bat, redone, but he wasn’t putting money on it. 
She hopped down off her desk and skipped across the room towards them, and Jason wished for half a second that he could command half as much menace doing something so… well, innocent. 
But no, he just put heads in a bag, that wasn’t scary apparently. Fucking Gotham. 
He obediently bent down for Harley to kiss his cheek, not wanting to be yanked around in the cop shop (even as a civilian), and still managed to be surprised when Danny also accepted a cheek kiss and then returned it. 
Harley squealed in delight and ruffled his hair, then pinched both Danny’s cheeks. 
“Awww, ain’t you all cute and cosmopolitan! So, shall we go see my big green bestie!” She declared happily, releasing Danny and turning back to lead the way out of the room. 
Didn’t go for the keys. Didn’t address the question to anyone who should have been leading them down. Just got going, the way Harley always did. 
No one moved to stop them. 
** 
Surprising precisely no one, Harley absolutely knew the way down to the cells at the GCPD. Not from a lotta personal experience, o’ course. 
Nah, Harley usually went from crime scene to Arkham back in the day, but she’d known people and busted people out of holding before. 
It had taken a couple real big favours to get Waylon kept here instead of shipped back to Arkham, but that was what favours were for. No one liked having a Harley-debt over their heads. 
And Brucie’s word was gonna get Waylon released on her recognizance, once she scooped some shivering copper out from under their desk. 
He’d have to actually behave this time though. No big bat-centric events, nothin’ above ground. 
Honestly… she might ask him ta head home. Being in Gotham wasn’t good for either of them. Too many old patterns and bad habits, and Waylon had been doin’ a real good job keeping his nose clean. 
If he wanted ta head back to Coney, they could get ‘im a ride. And if he didn’t, well, she’d have someone to watch the new show with.
Her two baby birds were following her like good little ducklings too, absolutely adorable. Although… she paused for a second, cocking her head. 
“Is there a reason we’ve got theme music?” She asked with a delighted giggle as the song clicked. 
It was a little muffled, but Styx’s Renegade? Ballsy choice for a trip to the cop shop. 
The question seemed to surprise both boys though, and then Danny sighed, reaching back to pat a weirdly bulging pocket. 
“Yeah, I upset my techno-god bestie this morning. Apparently my punishment is a soundtrack of my life,” he said dryly. 
Jason paused, a slight frown on his face as he listened too. 
“Wait, it changed? I thought you were on a loop?” He asked, and that was an interesting development. 
Danny just shrugged. 
“Yeah, he’s probably keeping an eye on us and changing it up when he thinks it’s funny. I think I know this song,” he added with a slight frown, brows furrowing as he listened. 
Jason listened a moment longer, then snickered and shook his head. 
“Tuck’s got good taste in music,” he said simply, and yeah, Harley remembered Tucker from dinner. Another lil cutie, all tucked up with Timmy in their own little world half the time. 
Damn good at Mariokart and Spiderheck too. 
Danny snorted and flipped Jason off. 
“Suck up.” 
And immediately the music changed, flipping straight to Pink’s Slut Like You, suddenly louder… although that mighta also been the song. 
Danny groaned as his pocket loudly declared that he was not a slut, and Jason laughed at him entirely unapologetically. 
“And that’s why I’m not the one with the soundtrack,” he declared smugly and Danny sighed, raising both hands in unequivocal surrender. 
“Yes, yes, I’m a bad and naughty boy and I’m getting my just punishment. Can we just get going?” He asked almost rhetorically. 
The music changed again, sultry twanging of a guitar before Lil Nas X began to sing Montero. It took Harley a moment longer to place it than the boys, both of whom now looked confused. 
“I can’t tell if he’s encouraging you or not,” Jason said finally, and Danny sighed. 
“Well I’ve pole danced into Hell before, so I’m taking it as a compliment either way,” he decided with a shrug, trying to shove what looked like an overstuffed sock deeper into his pocket. “I swear the volume shouldn’t get this loud.” 
“Joys of a touchy tech friend,” Harley opined with a snicker, glancing around to see if there were cameras Tucker could be watching from. She blew both she found a kiss, then spun to continue their quest. 
And realized that neither of the boys had followed her, both now watching her warily. 
“What?” She asked, frowning and turning to see if she’d stepped in something. Nope, just clean floors. 
“Danny’s sin was calling Tucker overdramatic,” Jason explained, and oh. Yeah, that explained the looks. 
Harley waved a hand cheerfully, deliberately brushing it off. 
“An’ now he’s givin’ ya life a soundtrack, so I dunno that he disagrees,” she said lightly, skipping back towards the stairs, “c’mon!” 
And when no new burst of music began to switch out Lil Nas, the boys got to following again, Danny grumbling about unfairness. 
Harley liked Danny. He had a refreshing lack of fucks to give, a good sense of humour, and he doted on Jason, who fucking deserved it. 
They’d be so good together, and Harley was gonna have the time of her life watchin’ them work that out. 
Which, now that she thought of it… 
“Hey, by th’ way, ya said ya didn’t wanna meet at the manor?” She prodded, turning to walk backwards down the steps to the cells, frowning at Jason, “what’d Brucie do now?” 
And watched the ease in Jason’s face freeze, muscles tightening, and Harley sighed. Yeah, a trip back to the manor was definitely in order. 
“Just his usual bullshit,” Jason grumbled, running a hand through his already wild helmet hair. Danny snickered beside him and gave her a broad grin. 
“Jason’s officially banned from hanging out with me,” he explained far too smugly, since there wasn’t a chance Jason would have listened to any Bruce-ban. 
But, he was beside the tall and handsome stud he had a crush on, so Harley wasn’t gonna argue. She grinned back at him, just as her foot nearly slipped on a step. 
Before the fall could fully start, she pushed off harder with the other foot, dodging both startled hands grabbing for her, and turned the fall into a backflip down the rest of the stairs. 
Taking gymnastics as a kid really should be a prerequisite for villainy. Especially with the Robins flipping around all over the place. 
She landed almost perfectly, stepping onto her back foot and then raising both arms and giving the boys a little bow. Then she sighed, resting her bat over her shoulder and mock pouting, tapping the side of her jaw. 
“I guess I’m just gonna have ta go back and give ‘im a lil percussive maintenance… bet he hasn’t been restin’ right since he got that concussion either. Maybe I’ll call Selina ta keep ‘im in bed for a week,” she mused. Jason mock puked. 
“I thought you wanted him to rest,” Danny snickered, earning himself a glare from his one true love. A consequence that did not phase him in the least. 
Harley laughed and waved a hand lightly, skipping ahead to get the door into the hall that held the actual cells while they descended the rest of the stairs. 
“Oh, she’s a big girl, Selina can do the work,” she teased, laughing louder when Jason groaned like his soul was being sucked out. 
There was a cop still sat behind the desk just inside the door, an older man whose stocky frame had started softening with age. 
He didn’t quite jump out of his seat as she entered, but dark eyes widened and ruddy skin paled when he saw her. Which, yeah, she had that effect on people. 
“Why are you here?” He demanded, voice only shaking a little. 
Harley gave him a sceptical once over. 
Not someone she’d run into personally, though probably on the force when she’d been active. Off the streets now, probably not far from retirement and trying to make it all the way there. 
Not a lotta Gotham cops did these days, in spite of the rampant corruption. Being in the Penguin’s pocket did sweet fuck all to protect ya when Scarecrow was having a hissy fit. 
This old bugger had probably joined back in the bad ol’ days when they could just ignore mob crimes, hassle the homeless, and look the other way if a situation got violent. 
These days between Gordon, the bats, and the increasingly dramatic rogues (among which she still counted herself even if Batsy didn’t, she had a reputation to uphold)? 
Lookin’ the other way wasn’t the protection it used ta be, and bein’ conveniently “late” to a crime scene didn’t help much either. 
This guy? Probably folded like cheap laundry at the first sign of trouble, but he’d stayed in place. That’d make her job easier anyway. 
Smiling sweetly at him, Harley strolled forwards and propped her bat on the floor, both hands on the handle as she leaned forward over it. 
“Pickin’ up a friend,” she told him sweetly, nodding to the line of cells down the hall, “Uber for Mr Waylon Jones?” 
The guy (Officer Perkins, said the name tag, but he’d not really proved himself memorable yet) swallowed visibly, hands shaking but still visible above the desk. 
Not going for a weapon. Not surprising. 
No one who’d seen a gun pulled on Harley before tended to try it themselves. Just like the Robins, she was a tough target. You had to be real sure. 
“Do you have the appropriate paperwork?” He rasped, a Gothamite accent still prominent despite the quiver. 
Harley raised an eyebrow, letting her smile go deadly sweet. 
“Would ya stop me if I didn’t?” She cooed, rocking forwards on her toes and grinning when his chair slammed back almost two feet. 
The shaking had progressed to a full body shiver, sweat dripping down a blotchy brow as he slammed a ring of keys on the edge of the desk, as close as he was willing to get. 
Harley scooped them up and straightened, tipping him a wink as she sauntered past. 
“Thanks bud! But yeah, I do actually have the paperwork, Judge Thompson’s gonna fax it all along this afternoon,” she told him brightly, twirling the ring of keys around one finger as she skipped back towards the cells. 
The judge’d fax it after she had another lil chat with Brucie. They’d cut things short last night, apparently too short for even their actual chat to finish sinking in. 
Gotta fix that. 
And remember to mention Waylon. 
And maybe see if he had any info on her own little issue. Though she might hit Barbara up for that first, bring some treats down library way. 
It was gonna be a busy day for ol’ Harley, but at least she got to spend time with the kids first. 
“Was that really necessary?” Jason asked with a raised eyebrow, following her down the hall with barely a glance at their shaking audience. 
“Necessary?” Harley asked sweetly, glancing into the first couple cells and skipping on. “No. Fun, yes!” 
“See this is why I like her,” Danny decided with a sage nod, and Harley shot him a wink, “she knows how to have a good time.” 
“I know how to have a good time,” Jason said immediately, and holy shit that was just sooooooo cute she nearly dropped the keys to go pinch his little cheeks again. 
Just all pouty and defensive and they weren’t even talkin’ about him! It was too much, Harley couldn’t stand it! 
“Yeah, and I like you too,” Danny replied in what he probably thought was a cool way, but no, that was just fucking adorable too. 
Too. 
Cute. 
Harley was gonna die. 
And maybe get herself a cool glowy transformation sequence apparently, which would be kinda cool. She’d always kinda wanted a magical girl moment. 
She could be their fairy-ghost-mother! 
And, to be fair ta Waylon, she had definitely gotten side tracked again. Almost forgot who she was here for. 
But really, it did not mean he had to make a grab for her when she almost walked right past his cell! She coulda done him an injury! 
He released her arm before the bat came down though, chuckling in that growly way of his and raising both hands. 
“Hey. Didn’t want you goin’ right past,” he said innocently, and Harley sighed fondly and reached her bat through the bars to bonk him gently on the head. 
“Hush you, I’m not that distractible,” she scolded him, completely ignoring any disbelieving noises from her two little love birds, “an’ anyway, you gotta be nice to me. I’m bustin’ yer ass out.” 
She jangled the keys at Waylon instead, then began swiping through them for the right one. 
The big guy obediently stepped back to let her look, his attention shifting past her to Danny and Jason. 
“An’ you brought company,” he growled, a wry grin on his face. She had to wonder if he’d noticed how dang adorable they were already at the gala. 
She’d missed soooo much! But he’d catch her up, because that’s what besties did. And cuz she’d kick all the kittens out of his room if he didn’t. 
Jason shrugged, coming up behind her to lean on the bars. 
“I had a passing interest in why you wanted to use me as bait for Two Face. We’re not exactly close,” he explained, the edited down version for their legal listeners in. 
“Ya got balls for a rich kid,” Waylon chuckled just as Harley found the key. One quick victory fist pump and she got to work on the lock. 
Really, there was a reason modern stations had one key ta open all the cells. Or electric locks. What if there was a fire? 
But then, it was Gotham. They’d happily let all their perps burn. An’ probably keep usin’ it as an excuse why they all needed a fat budget increase. 
“Victory! An’ he’s my adorable lil nephew, Croccy, so you’re gonna play nice,” she warned Waylon sternly, swinging the door open and wagging a finger at him sternly. 
Again, for the benefit of their audience, but also because she enjoyed putting on a little panto. A bit o’ show. 
(She’d have to remember to tell him Danny wasn’t in on the whole Hood secret though. She’d slip it in somewhere.) 
Waylon grunted in amusement and stepped through the door, stretching to his full height and breadth in the hallway. And stopping. 
“Who’s playin’ music?” He asked, head cocked as he tried to trace the muffled sound. 
Honestly, Harley’d kinda forgot it was playing until he said it. 
Danny sighed again, at his most put upon, and raised a hand. 
“I have offended the technogod and am being punished by soundtrack,” he explained in a tone so dry it desiccated. And didn’t exactly help. 
Harley patted the now-more-confused Croc on the elbow. 
“He’s upset one of his lil nerd friends by callin’ him dramatic, so his friend hacked ‘is phone to make it play music,” she explained much more helpfully for sure. 
Again, Jason and Danny took slight steps away from her. 
Again, nothing continued to happen. 
Harley’s smile grew more smug. 
“An’ apparently said friend still can’t get inta mine,” she declared brightly, shooting another glance up at the security camera and tapping her pocket. 
Waylon grunted again, clearly not needing to ask further because her explanation was perfect, and gave Danny a nod of recognition. 
“An’ is that why you’re here? Mood music?” He asked, heading off down the hall back towards the doors. Which, yeah, they had places to be. 
Danny brightened right away, grinning up at Waylon and moving to let the big guy pass. 
“Unless you want a rematch? I haven’t been tossed around like that in a while and I could use the exercise,” he snarked, and yeah, this was why Harley liked him. 
Waylon clearly did too, snickering and clapping a massive hand on Danny’s head on his way by. 
“Mouth like that’s gonna get yer killed one day, kid,” he grumbled, ignoring the still cowering cop as they made for the stairs. 
And Danny, bless him, angel of timing, just laughed and followed along, shooting Jason a wicked grin. 
“Oh, it’s way too late for that,” he said light as air, making Jason let out a snort of laughter. 
Waylon glanced down to Harley again, fully aware he’d missed something. She gave him another pat on the elbow. 
“Jason an’ Danny met at Dead Kids Anonymous. Kid’s got himself a ghost transformation an’ everything,” she explained simply, which didn’t have to be completely true to get the point across. 
It made Waylon snicker again, even as Danny cackled along behind them. 
“Now THAT is what we’re telling everyone else. We might as well have,” he rasped between laughter. 
His pocket music seemed to have changed to Thriller. Appropriate. 
Jason rolled his eyes, but he was still grinning. 
Harley didn’t think she’d seen him smile this much the entire time he was alive again. It was nice; most of the times she’d seen him as Robin they’d been fightin’, but he’d always been havin’ so much fun. 
At least he looked like he had. Poor kid deserved to smile a whole lot more too. 
Waylon was taking the news of Danny’s lack of mortality pretty well, giving the kid a thoughtful look. They’d made their way mostly out of the station now, their little bubble of terrified silence moving with them. 
That’d get old one day, but until then Harley was gonna take advantage. 
“Maybe we’ll have another tussle then,” he agreed with a low chuckle, holding the door for the others to leave through. Real southern gent. “Good t’know I won’t break ya.” 
Danny bounced through the door as chipper as Harley herself, giving him a beaming smile. 
“Hell yeah, we’ll find somewhere nice and out of the way. Oh, we had some questions too though,” he added almost as an afterthought, giving Jason a sheepish look that again: too cute. 
Maybe that was how he’d really died. Too cute to live. Though she’d let him make that joke himself. 
Jason didn’t seem bothered, though he did look a little more tense. Not sure where they’d be taking this, more’n likely. 
“Once we get somewhere private,” Waylon agreed, glancing between Jason and Harley himself. 
That probably meant it was on her to pick a destination then. Well, Harley had a place in mind that (while not technically private) wouldn’t involve onlookers. 
“Yeah, I know a spot! I’ll send ya the address, Jayjay, an’ we’ll meet ya there. Don’t think we’ll get four on that bike,” she teased, pulling out her phone. 
She knew the perfect spot, and it’d give her a chance to loop Waylon in. All good news. 
Jason held up a hand quickly.
“Not got mine on me. Text Danny,” he called, and Harley waved her phone over her head in acknowledgement. It might give Tucker a way to jump into her phone, she wouldn’t know.
Tech wasn’t her shtick. Just a good thing they’d all exchanged numbers the night before.
** 
It was a weird feeling to have his body shaken while his consciousness was so far from it. 
Feeling his face pull into a frown not quite mirroring what he felt it should be. Tucker could never have explained precisely what part of him entered his devices; just that it was him. 
Quintessential, pure essence of Too Fine. Everything he was without the meat he was born in. 
But then he did have to slot back into that meat, and trying to do that without matching positions always left him feeling weirdly off kilter the next day. Like he’d put on a shirt but the shoulders were skewed too short. 
So despite not being conscious of a face on his extended form, Tucker tried to form it into a frown anyway, sliding back under his own skin like a teen sneaking back through a window after curfew. 
Hadn’t those been heady days? 
Eyes slowly opening, it took Tucker a moment to remember how to focus them. That they weren’t cameras. But then Tim Drake-Wayne came into focus, and the frown changed to a grin even before he fully “woke up”. 
“Morning,” he mumbled, rolling and stretching, getting used to the feeling of a body again. It was a little weirder each time, which he might have worried about if he didn’t see himself as an extension of his PDA anyway. 
“You were singing in your sleep,” Tim told him without preamble, returning the smile. 
Tucker hesitated for a moment, suddenly embarrassed. If… well. If he’d been singing along, that… 
Look he’d picked songs that’d embarrass Danny, he wasn’t gonna give a fuck about it. The only actual question was, did he tell Tim? 
Who else would ever understand better just what it meant to interact with tech the way he could? Could get excited with him about how cool it was? 
He wasn’t fucking gushing to Technus. No way. Tuck was easily the one winning that ongoing hackathon, but it was the principle of the thing. 
To the zone with it. Tim knew about Amity Park, he knew about the ghosts and the liminal tech. And while they hadn’t exactly discussed liminal people, it’d come up. 
Tim could have a sneak preview. As a treat. 
Decision made, Tucker gave the younger man another broad smile because yeah, bragging about your super powers to a very cool and impressive person? That felt good. 
Tim might be a vigilante too, but Tucker was pretty sure Jason was the only souped up Robin. Most of the bats were famously power free. 
“Oh, yeah. I was bullying Danny,” he explained with a light chuckle, glancing up to find his beloved PDA, Ida. She was half under a blanket now, so he tugged her back out. 
Tim chuckled softly, leaning back and stretching himself. 
“Good dream?” He asked and Tucker snickered, stroking gently across the screen. 
“Danny wishes it was a dream.” Tucker paused, frowning a little at the confusion on Tim’s face. “So you remember we kinda talked about the whole liminal thing?” 
That seemed to jog Tim’s memory, confusion fading into an analytical frown that Tucker was already becoming familiar with. That good ol’ geek face. 
“The humans with budding ghost powers,” he agreed, and Tucker had to wonder if maybe he just hadn’t put the right pieces together yet. 
He hadn’t exactly said that most of Amity Park were liminal, but it was a little hard to remember he had to. Like, they lived on a portal to Hell. 
Maybe he shoulda. 
Well, at least it was a cool way to introduce it to him. 
Tucker pulled Ida into his lap, flipped her over, and tapped the plain plastic backing to demonstrate. 
“Mine’s a low level technopathy at the moment,” he explained as the PDA hummed and then began playing… well, still Montero, so he flicked it again and changed it immediately to Country Roads. 
Tim was watching him with a kind of hungry fascination, and Tucker turned the music off with a thought, then passed her to Tim so he could check for secret touchpads. 
“It’s not something I can do with anything,” he explained with a modest shrug, grinning with pride as Tim immediately got to scanning the casing. 
All simple plastic, not even biometrics; what would be the point? Even touching the PDA was pretty much a formality at this point. She was a part of him. 
“Technopathy? So you can control it with your mind? Why not with anything?” Tim asked eagerly, hands stroking over the plastic, eyes darting between it and Tucker. 
Like he wasn’t sure which was more interesting, Tuck or tech, and Tucker absolutely took that as a compliment. 
“It has to be a device I’ve really gotten into. Like, down to the source code, or something I’ve cracked before a couple times, and then I can just feel how all of it works.”
Tucker wiggled his fingers demonstratively and the PDA beeped to life under Tim’s hands, making the other man gasp. And yeah, totally envy in those cute blue eyes he turned all balefully on Tucker. 
“How many of the functions can you use? Anything the PDA can do, or…” Tim trailed off, clearly thinking of everything he’d already seen the PDA do. 
The real question would have been what couldn’t Ida do. And honestly? Yeah, Tucker remembered the trial phase. 
He gave another shrug. 
“Technically? Yeah, anything she can do, but I still prefer hacking the old fashioned way. Most of the network stuff too, cuz I’m only really “in” the PDA. Or Danny or Sam’s phones.” 
Tucker hesitated, wondering how best to really explain the difference. Danny had never been any good at it, Tucker’d had no idea what he was talking about from the video game thing right up until he’d been sucked in himself. 
Which… was probably gonna be a next-hangout adventure for Tim and the bats. And Oracle, if he could swing it. 
For now he gave up, giving Tim a hopeless grin. 
“Honestly it’s something you’ve really gotta feel for yourself. Danny’s great at the transition from real world to code, but he always just punches things, y’know? Turns out knowing how code is actually supposed to work doesn’t translate well to being part of it,” he added with a sigh. 
Because frankly? It was bullshit unfair. Tucker could code an entire other galaxy around Danny with his eyes closed, but put them in the same metaphysical layer as a firewall and Danny could just. 
Punch it. 
Which, theme for the week, was also not how firewalls fucking worked. At some point Tuck figured he’d either gain a new level of understanding through liminality, or give up and ask Technus a couple questions. 
Technus was currently Tucker’s subject instead of Danny’s anyway. They’d made a bet. 
Which meant Technus shoulda told him about their shenanigans in time, which was probably what Tucker would hold over his head for the whole firewall thing. 
It was so nice when things just worked themselves out. 
Tim looked a little disappointed, but mostly still intrigued. Tucker could see his fingers just itching for his own tablet to take notes. 
“Do you think that’ll change?” He asked, blurting it out like he couldn’t hold back now that Tucker stopped talking, “I mean, if you become more liminal? Or just practice your abilities more?” 
And see, this was what Tucker loved about Tim Drake-Wayne. They were on the same wavelength. He grinned back. 
“Probably. But I mean, it’s kinda cheating too. For now I kinda like that I have to do things the way I always used to first, before any ghostly powers kick in. It’s more me, y’know?” And like hell he’d let anyone think his code skills were just some meta ability. 
He’d worked damn hard for those skills, and he was damn good. One of the best, and he was also good enough to know he still wasn’t actually top of the charts. 
That was the Oracle, although knowing they still hadn’t cracked his servers felt really good. 
Tim was all but vibrating, clearly full of questions, but they were both interrupted by a loud growl from Tucker’s stomach. Immediately echoed by Tim’s, so at least he wasn’t alone. 
The two shared sheepish grins, and then Tucker stretched. 
“So, breakfast and then Twenty Questions?” He offered cheerfully, and Tim nodded at once, thrusting the PDA back and rolling off the frankly massive bed. 
“We can start while we eat, everyone else has probably gone out by now,” he said over one shoulder, stripping out of his clothes from the previous night and hurrying for his closet. 
Ah hell, Tucker had only brought the one change of clothes… which Alfred had laundered yesterday after the snowball fight. Which would mean they were. 
In a place. 
Probably in the manor. 
Maybe in the room they’d talked about setting up? 
He looked to Tim, and only then noticed that his tech idol was shucking off his boxers in exchange for new ones, entirely unselfconscious. 
Tucker frowned back down at his current borrowed shirt instead, waiting til he at least heard both feet on the floor before looking over again. Tim might not care, but in case he did, Tucker could be a gentleman. 
And then he could ask the important question. 
“Speaking of Alfred… my clothes?” He asked hopefully, and yeah, the way Tim’s mouth dropped open and his brain visibly blue screened? 
Just like Danny. They were gonna get along great. 
** 
Of all the top secret, private places in Gotham to go and have a villainous chat… Danny never would have expected a milkshake bar. But like he’d said last night, that was kinda what made it perfect. 
Who’d expect to find Harley Quinn and Killer Croc, properly Waylon, sat in a pastel pink corner booth in the back of the bar? 
Honestly, none of the staff seemed surprised. But they might not have been to see all the bats walk in; it was Gotham. Rogues happened. If no one pulled a weapon, don’t be the reason that changes. 
It made him feel right at home, really. Just like Amity Park. 
And they made a damn good milkshake. Danny took another deep slurp of his, cookie butter and cheesecake was definitely a combo he’d been sleeping on. 
If pressed, he couldn’t really explain what he’d wanted out of this meeting. 
Something in what Harley had said last night had struck home in a way he hadn’t expected, but with Waylon in front of him now… well, for one thing he seemed a lot more like just some guy who happened to be green. 
And who was just adorably happy with his cotton candy milkshake, complete with little umbrella. 
At the gala, he’d been big and menacing and monstrous, all things Danny was very used to and meant “friend” more often than they meant anything else. He’d still take a rematch, but he just… 
Well, that was just it, wasn’t it? 
Waylon really wasn’t all that monstrous, if you looked the faintest scratch past sharpened teeth and scales. He was polite to the servers, a happy straight-man to Harley’s jokes, and he could have teased Jason more for Danny’s tastes but it was definitely effective. 
Jason was much more at ease here with two rogues than he’d been any time his adoptive dad was around. That… well, Danny knew full well he didn’t know much about Jason’s life. 
It felt like he’d learned a whole lot more just today already, though again, it’d be hard to explain exactly what. 
The conversation had been light, easy, and full of banter so far, and Danny really wasn’t sure how to segue from that to “so you were called a monster all your life”. 
Because while for the most part Danny now only had to deal with the GIW calling him a monster (and they’d been quiet for years now, still rebuilding after the whole “bomb the ghost zone” bs)… the things his parents had called him still hurt. 
The things people thought he was, ghosts and living alike, he just… he didn’t know what to do with it. These days he could mostly ignore it, and unlike Waylon he could even pass for living. 
(Never for a ghost though. He’d never be able to stop any ghost from seeing him and knowing immediately, instinctively, that he was other.) 
In some ways it felt like meeting Vlad all over again, but without the crushing disappointment. Well, what it might have been to learn there was another halfa if he hadn’t preceded it by being a massive creep. 
It was… complicated. And all tangled up in his feelings around Jason, because Jason actually was like him and really did get it, or would soon. 
And Jason clearly liked Waylon, for all he grimaced and bitched about the deadpan teasing. Waylon had a lot of interesting stories about Jason’s cape days, most of which Jason hurried to try to interrupt. 
Harley had more, and they’d sat at opposite ends of the table before the boys had arrived, almost certainly so Jason couldn’t shush them both at once. 
If he clapped a hand over Harley’s mouth, Waylon would either take up the tale or start one of his own, and vice versa. There was just no way Jason could win. 
It reminded Danny of his own rogues, though maybe more Fright Knight than Ember or Johnny. The ones he got along with, but more respectfully than just his friends. 
Kinda like watching Harley with the rest of the bat-brood. 
Danny was very nobly doing his best not to enjoy it too much; within a week or two it’d be his turn roughhousing with his rogues, and he was hoping Jason would return the favour. 
There was no way he could get any kind of ghost fight club going without his usual players, and those were the ones with all the most embarrassing stories of his early days. 
Johnny and Kitty especially had blackmail material for days, so as much as Danny was loving the lil baby Robin stories (carefully never actually mentioning the name, since no one was masked)… no, his feeling was kinda more impending doom. It’d be his turn soon. 
And Ancients help them if Harley and Waylon met Johnny and Kitty… nope, not thinking about that. Suppressing a shudder, Danny deliberately tuned back in to Waylon’s story about the time he’d kidnapped Bruce Wayne. 
At least Jason was having fun with this one. 
Of course, it couldn’t have the obvious ending; whether or not Waylon had known at the time that he had Batman, you couldn’t mention the punch line out in public. It’d be rude. 
He left the story at the Robin beat down instead, declaring that the big Bat himself hadn’t even bothered to show up. Didn’t quite go full stage wink, but it was pretty much the next best thing. 
Danny laughed along with the table and Jason shook his head, settling back into his seat with a low huff. 
“Fun as this is, we did have some questions,” he said, voice just a little lower than before. 
Danny was a little surprised he’d bring it up in such a public space. Right up until Harley glanced around, nodded, and settled back into her seat. 
“Clear too. Any o’ the gawkers ‘ve been seen out,” she agreed with a slight nod. 
Danny startled, looking around himself. The milkshake bar was… about half as full as it had been when they arrived. His confusion must have been obvious, because Waylon snickered. 
“It ain’t the Iceberg Lounge, kid, but this is one of Dr Freeze’s more self sustaining operations. Can’t all be heisting diamonds,” he added with a slight shrug. 
Not noticeably less confused, Danny turned to Jason instead. Jason chuckled softly, shaking his head and giving Danny a grin that was almost proud. 
“Shit, you’ve lived in Gotham a year and it’s a fucking miracle how little you know. Iceberg Lounge is the Penguin’s upscale club. This place is run by the guy we talked about last night, freeze rays and diamond heists,” he explained quickly. 
Harley snickered, draping her arms over the back of their booth. 
“An’ if some o’ his ol’ Arkham buddies come in ta chat, his people know ta clear out anyone tryin’ to listen in too hard,” she added, nodding to one of the servers. 
Well. 
That tracked. 
Danny had also definitely thoroughly demolished his “keeping away from rogues” spree, which kinda sucked. But then, since he’d basically gone from one extreme to the other? 
Maybe that’d be fun to tell his classmates about too. It definitely tracked more with Danny’s understanding of his own luck. A whole year, no trouble? More like no chance. 
Also meant this had to be a safe place to talk, apparently. What was it about rogues that made them so eager to get on with each other but nobody else? 
Well, Danny got on with most of his now. But still. 
Jason leaned forward, arms folded on the table. 
“So what’s going on with Two Face, Waylon?” He asked quietly, still apparently aware of eavesdroppers. 
Waylon glanced around the bar, then shrugged, settling back against the booth. 
“Hard to say, with ‘im. Coulda been a coin flip, coulda been somethin’ else, but he wasn’t just gunnin’ for the gala. Somethin’ about you specifically put a bug in his ass, kid,” he added with a frown, nodding towards Jason. 
Something in Danny tensed, not liking the idea of anyone targeting Jason. Of course, it must have happened before… when he was Robin. 
And he’d died. 
Danny hadn’t even noticed he was clenching his fists until Jason nudged his foot under the table. 
Safe-worry-you okay? Jason’s aura was getting clearer, and Danny did his best to smile back. Sometimes his Obsession still snuck up on him. 
Forcing himself to relax, he grabbed his milkshake instead. It felt warm, which was odd until he realised his hands were icy cold. 
Not quite literally, but closer than he’d come in a while. 
Neither of the rogues seemed to have notice, Harley playing with her milkshake while she frowned at Waylon. 
“An’ you decided the best thing ta do was hit the gala first?” She asked dryly, her tone neatly conveying just what she thought of that idea. 
Waylon shrugged. 
“Not like I coulda swung an invite to get in nicely. Sounded like he had somethin’ real nasty planned, kid,” he added, shaking his head and leaning back in his seat. 
Jason frowned, giving Danny another soft kick on the ankle as he leaned forward. Unnecessarily, for sure, Danny totally had his shit under control now. 
“But no one said anything about why? I don’t think I’ve even met him,” Jason asked and yeah, that probably meant as Jason. Maybe even post Robin. 
Waylon shrugged again. 
“It’s fuckin’ Two Face. Maybe he ran outta matching targets and figured two lives had ta count?” He offered, though it looked like it was still bugging him too. 
Harley huffed and shook her head, blonde ponytails bouncing. 
“I’ll keep an ear out too.  There’s a couple people who’ll prefer talkin’ ta me over you, sugar,” she teased Waylon as he grunted, a tinkling laugh falling from her lips. 
Waylon snorted, but a reluctant smile curled his lips. 
“More likely to spill to ya,” he agreed in a low grumble, poking his straw around a mostly empty milkshake. 
Harley nodded brightly, clapping her hands. 
“Exactly! ‘Specially if they don’t want any of their own special lil secrets told,” she agreed with a truly wicked smile. Then she paused, a slight frown curling her brow. 
It was still a little weird to be able to see the moments where her brain revved up. Danny had to assume it was having been raised by Jazz; it was clearly easy for people to get lost in the bubbly exterior. 
Fingers drumming on the table now, something had clearly jogged her memory. 
“Might be somethin’ ta do with Black Mask too,” she said more quietly, gaze unusually serious as she caught Jason’s eyes, “he’s been quieter ‘n I like lately. Keepin’ ‘imself out of trouble.” 
Danny might just ask if Jason could get him a rolodex of the Gotham villains to match the server Danny had provided for the Zone. 
It did not help that they all had their own wild code names. He was used to dealing with people who had a lot of personality, sure, and theatrics. But ghosts usually just had the one name. 
Except apparently for Frighty, or Halloween as Danny would have to start calling him now. It’d take some getting used to. 
Jason noticed his desperately pleading puppy eyes and sighed. 
“Look, I’ll give you the rundown on everyone tonight. Black Mask is a whole ass problem. Crime boss for the False Face Society, really likes skinning peoples’ faces. Red Hood kicked him out of Crime Alley a couple years ago, he firmed his grip on the rest of Gotham, and him being quiet is never fucking good.” 
And as if that didn’t sound bad enough… 
“An’ he really doesn’t like Jason,” Waylon growled, shoulders tightening and straining his shirt. 
Something in Danny tensed again, and he forced himself to take a long, deep breath. Closed his eyes and took another. 
This was why he’d avoided the whole subject. Until now. 
He could taste Jason’s concern like a tang in the air as he spoke up. 
“There’s fuck all he can do while I’m in the Alley though. Unless something’s really changed he can’t challenge Red Hood,” he explained quietly, leaning in until their shoulders brushed. 
Harley heaved a dramatic sigh, raising a hand and waving to one of the servers. 
“Yeah, yeah, you jus’ take care of yaself, kid. Roman’s a pain in the ass an’ if ya let him kill ya again he’ll be intolerable,” she grumbled, the tone at odds with the cheery smile she gave the first server to glance over. “Another round!” 
“Anything different?” The server, a young man with shaggy blond hair asked. 
Danny considered it, since the menu was both extensive and interesting, but really? It’d complicate things, and he didn’t want to think about something else. 
Just the idea of some asshole gangster trying to kill Jason was bad enough. But he sucked in another deep breath and reminded himself that this was pretty much all speculative. 
Black Mask was quiet, not actively threatening, and Gotham had an army of vigilantes to keep an eye on him even before Harley and Waylon got involved. An army of vigilantes who all seemed to like Jason. 
Jason wasn’t worried. Danny wasn’t gonna go all protective mama bear on the guy just because rogues existed. 
The one thing he’d always promised himself was that even with a Protection Obsession, he was never gonna be as bad as Jazz at her clingiest. 
He loved his sister, she meant well, but he’d hated her constant fussing. Danny had actually died sure, but he’d come right back and she hadn’t noticed for months. 
Jason didn’t have a scratch on him. Or any reason to put up with a clingy almost-stranger, Danny reminded himself as he accepted his new milkshake, hiding a smile behind the glass. 
Hell, if Jason being Fright Knight meant he’d sense if Danny was in danger, maybe that could work both ways. That’d be worth asking Frostbite about, and they had to see him for Jason’s core checkup soon. 
Having survived one Clockwork encounter without a lecture, Danny wasn’t pushing his luck. 
And if it turned out that it wouldn’t be that easy… well, there were other ways Danny could know if Jason was hurt, and unless they had a way to change dimensions? No Gotham rogue could take Jason anywhere that Danny couldn’t find him. 
The feel of another halfa was still faint for now, barely noticeable unless Jason was in the same room, but it was already stronger. 
Or Danny was more used to looking for him. More used to the feel of his energy, the boiling rage of the pit tangled up in everything else that was Jason. 
Kinda a lot still angry, but tempered. Mixed in with that wonderful sense of humour, dry sarcasm and death jokes, and determination. 
Danny was pretty sure he could find Jason pretty much anywhere on Earth right now if he had to. And it would only get easier. 
With the question of Harvey Dent settled as much as it would be (and if a flip of a coin was all he needed, maybe as much as it could be), the conversation turned lighter. 
Harley and Waylon stayed off the topic of rogues, probably to minimise the need to keep filling Danny in. They also mostly avoided embarrassing baby Jason stories though. 
No, instead they filled Danny and Jason in on what they’d been up to down on Coney Island. 
Danny had never expected to enjoy another circus story again, let alone an actual freakshow, but somehow? Hearing Harley tell it, he almost wanted to drop by. 
Not see the damn show. Nope. Hard pass. 
But hanging out with the performers, Harley’s tenants? That sounded like fun. They were just ordinary people, if a bit to the left. 
Roller derby sounded great, even if Danny wouldn’t play it with humans. In the Ghost Zone though? They could probably make a rink. And baseball bats. 
Waylon’s stories were way more domestic too; there was just something about a 7’ crocodile man telling you about his efforts to finally hold the skittish little grey kitten upstairs. 
It was just… well. Like hanging out with Kitty and Johnny, or Wulf. Maybe the only people who could understand what it was like to be a vigilante were the rogues who fit the other half of the mold. 
They all lived lives skewed away from the normal, didn’t fit in. The more they talked and shared stories, the more Danny settled. Relaxed. 
Which was when the last piece finally fell into place. He knew what he wanted to ask Waylon now. 
** 
Still on edge from the night before, Constantine wasn’t exactly thrilled to bits to be hearing from the Big Bat again so soon. 
Honestly, why couldn’t he have a nice, normal emergency? Just the world ending, some arch demon jumping for the throne of Hell, a wayward amateur magician or cursed artefact? 
Why did it always have to be Amity fuckin’ Park? 
Still, after they’d given the whole League the rundown, John was planning on washing his hands of the whole affair. They’d be up to date, they’d have his recommendation (leave well enough alone), and whatever they did after that? 
That could be Zatanna’s problem. Or Shazam’s. Which didn’t really matter. 
So of course there was just one more thing that Batman wanted from him first. 
“A health check on yer revenant?” He asked skeptically, arms folded as he scowled at an annoyingly refreshed and rejuvenated looking Batman. 
Who just nodded patiently like he hadn’t said anything crazy. 
“Nothing strenuous. Just a check in, and then we move on to the meeting,” he agreed blandly, watching John from behind the cut outs. 
Constantine pinched the bridge of his nose and drew in a heavy breath. Let it out. Decided not to think about all of the things that could go wrong tangling with a fuckin’ revenant. 
Bats was still here, hale and healthy, so the kid was clearly used to extreme provocation. How bad could John’s company be? 
Way, way worse the little honest part of him supplied, but… 
Well. The worst of it all was, no matter how damn annoying the man was, how fucking insistent on poking into shit that’d get ‘em all killed? 
Constantine liked him. 
Just a bit. The tiniest, littlest bit, that he firmly ground under his heel at every opportunity, and especially when that poking was getting close to end-of-the-world levels. 
It was the only reason the League had his number at all, because John Constantine sure as shit was not a hero. He liked the world not ending, yeah, but he coulda had Zatanna call him for those. 
He just. Had maybe the very smallest soft spot for how earnest the Big Three all were, deep down. Wonder Woman especially, there was a lady who’d been in the game longer than John himself, and yet it never fuckin’ touched her. 
They still looked at the world, at an old shit like John Constantine, and saw something worth saving. 
So even when he was tired, stressed, and wondering just how deep he should dare to probe to check the Bat’s explorations in Amity Park hadn’t garnered the wrong kind of attentions… 
He huffed another reluctant sigh. It did not help knowing that even if he refused, the Bat would just argue him down until John gave in, or the meeting started. 
It was three hours before the meeting was due to start. 
Constantine would rather jump straight through the damn Fenton portal. 
“Fine,” he growled, hands stuffed deep into the pockets of his trench coat. If the revenant got cranky, he could always hide behind the big Bat. 
The bastard didn’t even bother thanking him, just nodded like he’d expected John to agree all along, and made for the exit. 
Were they fuckin’ going out in full costume? In the middle of the day? 
Well heavens forbid Bruce Goddamn Wayne do anything subtly. 
** 
Tim’s afternoon was going great. Thanks to Tucker, he’d had a full and hearty brunch, which made Alfred happy. 
Tim wasn’t much of a gourmet himself, probably as a result of having to survive on what he could find in the house between his parents’ visits. So long as it went down his throat and kept him alive, he was happy. 
He knew Alfred’s cooking was great, it always tasted fantastic, he just… didn’t get excited about food. 
Tucker though? Tucker gushed enthusiastically over every bite, moaning loudly as he dug into pancakes, sausages, bacon, and even black pudding. 
He enjoyed his food almost as much as Wally, and Tim found himself savouring his own a little more as he watched. Usually he’d swallow half of it whole, just to get back to work. 
But he didn’t have a new case today. Sure, there was still work to do on Amity Park (and rewriting all of the Justice League reporting protocols, ugh). 
But he had Tucker here to help, and really, today could be about getting to know the guy. He’d more than learned his lesson from the last few days. 
It turned out that food tasted a whole lot better if he actually stopped to chew it. 
They’d talked while they ate too, Tucker often with his mouth full like he just couldn’t stop and wait to swallow. 
It was kinda adorable. 
Tim had shared some stories about the missions he’d been on with Young Justice, Tucker had told him more about Technus. There may have been a secret side trip to Amity Park in the works so Tim could meet him. 
And introduce Cassie to Pandora. 
There may also have been a secret side trip to the Ghost Zone being planned too. That one was gonna have to be extra-double-top-secret though, since Constantine put a bug in B’s ass about the Infinite Realms. 
But honestly, how bad could it be if three completely untrained teenagers could just hop in and out on a whim? 
Sure, there were risks. Some of the bigger, scarier ghosts that Tucker told him about. And just the air of the realms itself, which wasn’t great for humans in the long term. 
That, Tim was a little less sure about. Tucker could say it’d never done him any harm all he liked, but he was kinda half dead now. Dead enough for super powers. 
Not that Tim wanted super powers. It’s not like he’d ever needed them to keep up with his super friends. He didn’t need them, not even to interface his brain with his computer… 
Nope. 
But that was also how they got around to how Tucker would be getting home, because Tim finally twigged. 
“Wait… when you say Danny flew you here, you didn’t actually mean what you said about the plane, did you?” He asked cautiously when they’d migrated back to the bat cave (with a plate of cookies and juice. Alfred was totally taking advantage of a chance to feed Tim). 
Tucker grinned sheepishly and shrugged. 
“Well, I didn’t know Danny was gonna just go off like that right away. But yeah, he just came and grabbed me and we flew through the Ghost Zone.” 
He seemed to think Tim might be upset with him, but honestly? This was great news. They might be able to wrangle a little extra time. 
“So… needing to go home today was because of Danny?” He asked hopefully. 
Tucker caught on at once, like the genius he was, tracking Tim’s grin and beginning to smile in return. 
“Well, technically I do also have classes on Monday, but so long as I’m back tonight I can fake it if you have another way to get me home, like… say, a bat plane?” He asked innocently, head cocked to one side. 
Tim snatched up his phone, sending a quick text. Of course, there was always the chance Connor wouldn’t answer. Or that he’d be busy. Or that he’d have school. 
As if he wouldn’t have dropped pretty much anything when Tim called him. God Tim loved his boyfriend. 
“I was actually thinking of something a little more discrete than the bat plane… especially since you have some experience being carried.” 
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