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#and now ... i cry

today i was like “i’m gonna wake up early and go to the grocery store first thing so i can get stuff to make cookies”

and now it is 11 i have been up for 3 hours i have not gone to the grocery store but i have written two more romtober ficlets so i only have two more left to write and y’all i am BLESSED ON THIS DAY

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You ever do something, get excited because it’s going not too bad and then have the slow rolling and crushing realisation that it’s not going well at all and you’re going to fail because you can’t just do things like everyone else and you have no idea what the fuck you’re going to do with your life and even though no one says anything, you know they’re all judging you for still living at home and doing basically nothing because you have no social life or friends to hang out with so, to them, all you do is sit at home doing nothing because that’s actually what you do because you can’t get yourself to actually do things and then you end up with nights like tonight where you have little over 24 hours to complete this character rig and do a full, 30 second 3d animation with sound and rendered while having no idea how to actually use the program properly or animate and the rig still isn’t working but because that’s not enough you also need to find and/or take four more “street photography” photos and finish the journal where you talk about your inspiration and technical shit because just liking taking photos isn’t enough for these people but you’ve already spent over four hours just sitting at the computer achieving basically nothing all the while time slowly drips away and any self-confidence or belief you had is just draining away? 

Because that. 

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okie okie okie noW i know what i want for my birthday

it’s not much either🥺

okay here it is — for any of my anime husbandos to talk to me, but they’re the discord botS


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hmm okay so in my tftbl au where tim is there i’m like. imagining a scenario where vasquez’s face was actually eaten and rhys comes back with half the face and the scanner isn’t taking it because it’s just. half a face. and everyone starts arguing because the plan is completely ruined now

and tim is off in the corner w that jackedup mask from the presequel that warbles his voice and big ol goggles so he’s unrecognizable and when it’s like super obvious they can’t come up with a plan he’s just like…god dammit…….i can get you guys up there

and they’re like how the hell is some random merc gonna get us on helios without a disguise??? and he pulls all his shit off and is like cause i’m handsome jack

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