#and now it’s so much worse

[ao3-crack]

(x)

#archive of our own #ao3 stuff #ao3 quotes #archive of our own quotes #fanfic #fanfic quotes #funny #ao3 #ao3 tags #this isn’t a fix-it fic #this is the opposite of a fix-it #this is a break-it #i make it so much worse #bro star kid is so fucking good #I watched npmd and now I’m rewatching the whole hatchet field universe #and I forgot how fucking good they are

[eyes-of-nine]

pls assume i'm thinking about this moment 24/7 all week every week

#ahsjgdh i love the young xianle quartet sm they're almost barely not traumatized...kinda #they're very silly especially in retrospect #aaa i do also really want to draw young xie lian and mu qing but the idea of rendering that much gold detailing sounds like hell ywy #i'll do it but christ alive #my art #fanart #tgcf #tgcf fanart #tgcf spoilers #technically #also i haven't read past book 3 for now ywy #tian guan ci fu #heaven official's blessing #feng xin #hua cheng #...he gets one tag bc i'm not keeping track of all the aliases #every time i draw hc his hair gets worse and worse #my man has not seen a hairbrush in the past 800 or so years of his existence

[the-merry-otter]

Ok so I’ve fallen down a rabbit hole of researching period food & recipes, and,,,,

"one fifteenth century recipe contains the word "Chickens" four times-with four different spellings, of which the first is "Schyconys.""

excuse me medieval people but what the fuck

#I come onto this website and make jokes about medieval spelling #and then I see an actual period spelling and it’s so much worse than anything I could possibly dream up #medieval reenactment #medieval #medievalcore #history #i’ll be on my merry way now

[inkskinned]

you were raised in comparison.

it wasn't always obvious (well. except for the times that it was), but you internalized it young. you had to eat what you didn't like, other people are going hungry, and you should be grateful. you had to suck it up and walk on the twisted ankle, it wasn't broken, you were just being a baby. you were never actually suffering, people obviously had it worse than you did.

you had a roof over your head - imagine! with the way you behaved, with how you talked back to your parents? you're lucky they didn't kick you out on your ass. they had friends who had to deal with that. hell, you have friends who had to deal with that. and how dare you imply your father isn't there for you - just because he doesn't ever actually talk to you and just because he's completely emotionally checked out of your life doesn't mean you're not fucking lucky. think about your cousins, who don't even get to speak to their dad. so what if yours has a mean streak; is aggressive and rude. at least you have a father to be rude to you.

you really think you're hurting? you were raised in a home! you had access to clean water! you never so much as came close to experiencing a real problem. sure, okay. you have this "mental illness" thing, but teenagers are always depressed, right. it's a phase, you'll move on with your life.

what do you mean you feel burnt out at work. what do you mean you mean you never "formed healthy coping mechanisms?" we raised you better than that. you were supposed to just shoulder through things. to hold yourself to high expectations. "burning out" is for people with real jobs and real stress. burnout is for people who have sick kids and people who have high-paying jobs and people who are actually experiencing something difficult. recently you almost cried because you couldn't find your fucking car keys. you just have lost your sense of gratitude, and honestly, we're kind of hurt. we tell you we love you, isn't that enough? if you want us to stick around, you need to be better about proving it. you need to shut up about how your mental health is ruined.

it could be worse! what if you were actually experiencing executive dysfunction. if you were really actually sick, would you even be able to look at things on the internet about it? you just spend too much time on webMD. you just like to freak yourself out and feel like you belong to something. you just like playing the victim. this is always how you have been - you've always been so fucking dramatic. you have no idea how good you have it - you're too fucking sensitive.

you were like, maybe too good of a kid. unwilling to make a real fuss. and the whole time - the little points, the little validations - they went unnoticed. it isn't that you were looking for love, specifically - more like you'd just wanted any one person to actually listen. that was all you'd really need. you just needed to be witnessed. it wasn't that you couldn't withstand the burden, but you did want to know that anyone was watching. these days, you are so accustomed to the idea of comparison - you don't even think you belong in your own communities. someone always fits better than you do. you're always the outlier. they made these places safe, and then you go in, and you are just not... quite the same way that would actually-fit.

you watch the little white ocean of your numbness lap at your ankles. the tide has been coming in for a while, you need to do something about it. what you want to do is take a nap. what you want to do is develop some kind of time machine - it's not like you want your life to stop, not completely, but it would really nice if you could just get everything to freeze, just for a little while, just until you're finished resting. but at least you're not the worst you've been. at least you have anything. you're so fucking lucky. do you have any concept of the amount of global suffering?

a little ant dies at the side of your kitchen sink. you look at its strange chitinous body and think - if you could just somehow convince yourself it is enough, it will finally be enough and you can be happy. no changes will have to be made. you just need to remember what you could lose. what is still precious to you.

you can't stop staring at the ant. you could be an ant instead of a person, that is how lucky you are. it's just - you didn't know the name of the ant, did you. it's just - ants spend their whole life working, and never complain. never pull the car over to weep.

it's just - when it died, it curled up into a tight little ball.

something kind of uncomfortable: you do that when you sleep.

#writeblr #warm up #my dad was actively doing bad shit to us and we STILL were told we were lucky . and to a point i do think im lucky #i just think also there's somethin to be said about like. how about we stop using comparison to dismiss ppls individual struggles #yes there are people who have no perspective. for the reference tho having perspective actually made me really unwilling to get help #for what was a serious and debilitating mental health issue. bc i thought i didnt DESERVE IT #and i would rather have 600 ppl who aren't THAT bad get help and get heard and get seen #than make any 1 kid. do the math that i did: look at the world that is dying and the people who are hurting and say #''oh. okay. others have it worse. they are probably better people than i am. i am being unreasonable. i cannot ask for help #i am not good. i am taking too much space. i am not worth saving.'' #bc our WHOLE lives we are taught a scarcity mindset - that you can 'steal' from someone. so that instead of changing a system that doesn't #actually offer fair support to everyone #we put the impetus on the individual to just... demand less. #and here's something - there are probably ppl who think i DIDNT deserve to get help #bc i DID have it better than other people #and something about that is ... so sickening. bc i think all of us in some way at some point WILL need help. #we were supposed to make communities. we were supposed to offer our hands. we were supposed to raise the barn #instead we said: it could be worse. now handle it yourself

[isjasz]

[Day 170]

Lethal company stream doodlessjhshsss that was so fun to watch YIPPEE

#dddaily4sherin #grian #goodtimeswithscar #skizzleman #impulsesv #isdoodles #gigs #GIGSSSSSSS I MISS GIGS SM I HAVENT CAUGHT THEIR STREAMS IN SO LONG #lethal company actually looks so much more fun now its SO COOL #also weeping angels my worse nightmare fr #this stream just had so many good moments i love it sm BHSAHDHAHAD

[ipostmysimpingstuffanonymously]

They both lost their team and their teacher....

#in my head yuji is the only one who understands #both of them deserve a hug #idk what it is about younger people taking care of adults that hurts so much #shoko deserves to have a breakdown moment lets be honest the shit she went through #jokes on me i know exactly how shoko feels and how you just dont want to move #not only her team but also her underclassmates #and now that megs is gone #omg #and nanami who meant alot to both of them #and gojo #im just making it worse for myself #pathetic #shoko ieiri #yuji itadori #jjk #236 #jujutsu kaisen #found family between these two #i need fanfictions.... #itadori yuuji #yuuji #shoko #IPMSSA_Panels #IPMSSA_canon!Fixit #IPMSSA_FoundFamily!Fanart

[turtleblogatlast]

I love Raph and haven’t said that enough so to be more specific I love that Raph is a soft boy who loves bear plushies, a gross boy who eats an assortment of things that are definitely better left alone, a smart boy who is more than capable of taking down villains through planning and fortitude alike, a strong boy who is dedicated to training his muscles and fighting prowess, a teenage boy who loves his brothers but is more than happy to tease and roughhouse with them, an angry boy who sometimes lets his anger take a hold of him to cover the fear, a gentle boy who is generous with hugs and affirmations to those he loves, a capable boy who takes on more than should ever be expected of a teenager, a good boy who just wants to be a hero and slowly comes to realize the cost of that duty, a good boy who has no reservations about putting himself in the way of harm coming to his family, a good boy who’s a great brother and son and person and deserves only the best the world has to offer.

#rottmnt #rise of the teenage mutant ninja turtles #rottmnt raph #rise raph #he’s so wonderful frfr #my poor boy is traumatized but still so proud of what they accomplished because they’re HEROES #what started as something fun - Saturday morning cartoon-like heroes vs villains esque - soon becomes his calling #and he loses himself a little along the way #because the world is TERRIFYING now #if they don’t do something about the bad things in the world then worse things will come #and Raph CARES too much to let it happen #even at the expense of his own happiness and youth #and he luckily reigns back that fear - knowing his family is there to keep an eye out with him #and he finally lets himself be a kid again #he’s very well rounded and his flaws are so good because (like the others) they are ALSO his strengths #I like how it’s softly implied that bears are his fav animal too bc that’s cute af #headcanon that he likes them so much because a stuffed bear was the first toy splinter managed to get Raph #but yeah one of my favorite things about tmnt is that the characters are well rounded and rottmnt exemplifies that immensely #with raph being no exception!! #amazing big brother and character #there’s a REASON in my tmnt main character tierlist he’s S tier!!!! #hot take but in terms of who should be leader I think it should be less who’s the better leader- #-and more who’s the better leader FOR THIS SPECIFIC MISSION #bc all four can be great leaders fight me on that #APRIL can as well 100% #doesn’t need a designated leader for them to succeed #they just need ~communication~ #one of my favorite things tying Raph and Leo together is that they both *hide* #I’ve talked about Leo’s many masks a lot but Raph has one too #and it’s the mask of a hero - the mask of the protector

[naariel]

Halsin Romance Epilogue Spoilers

🐻💚🐻💚🐻

finished coloring the comic! This is how the epilogue ended and I won't hear otherwise

#Halsin #baldur's gate 3 #halsin x tav #halsin romance #ok can I go back to being a normal human being now that this is out of my system or will this only make my obsession so much worse

[ahhrenata]

I’m having an ‘oh’ moment while you bandage my hand, man

MY THOUGHTS FOR THIS ONE ARE IN THE TAGS :)

#steddie #steddie fanart #eddie munson #steve harrington #its late.. or early depending how you look at it #neither of them have been sleeping much or spending time on their own #the nightmares you know #an especially brutal one has eddie a little out of it #his bandages (from injuries that could have been worse) have become loose or soiled from his restless night #so steve sits him down and helps fix them up #he can see eddies still shaken so he just.. talks #about anything really #and eddie slowly comes back to himself #and now he’s just looking at steve.. who’s huffing out a laugh at whatever he’s said.. smiling at the memory of it #eyes crinkling at the corners and thats when it kind of hits #the ‘oh’ #not an ‘oh shit’ this time but a simple ‘oh’ #a happy one for now too #because he is.. happy. he’s not alone.. he doesn’t have to be.. and Steve’s showing him that #through late night talks.. matching dark circles and grounding touches #with stories and music and late night drives #and thats enough.. more than really #he’s at the tipping point.. knows the fall will be coming in the next few weeks- maybe months #but he doesn’t care #not when steve finally looks up at him… wide eyed and cradling eddies hand between two of his.. soft smile on his face and asks ‘you ok?’ #and when eddie (who’s a little misty eyed) smiles back and replies ‘all good’ #right here.. in this moment- he really is #:) #THANKS FOR VOTING FOR IT

[canon-gabriel-quotes]

Wear Headphones :]

Transcript:

Mmh- I... Oh wow. Ahgh! Mmph! I'm gonna GET SILLY. ALL OVER.

Ah-ghg. *exhale* Fuh-fuck. Heh-heh... I got too silly.

End Transcription

*coughs* this was actually going to be a comic but I Don't Have Time For All That. So if you want to see the incomprehensible version its below *coughs*

And heres v1 staring at fuckin nothin if you want it for some reason??

Since this is a lot of clips here is the audio source dumping ground (not in order)

Clip 1

Clip 2

Clip 3

#suggestive #ultrakill #gabriel ultrakill #im actually going to jail for this one. #sorry if the audio levels are a bit.. weird. its difficult when its a bunch of different clips together #please enjoy the 5 minutes spent on the comic layout #i did the first panel and said 'nvm lol' I didnt even finish adding the terminal text #shoutout to the one person in chat who said 'IM SILLYING' this is all your fault /j #i hate transcribing these #help. #OK................. THATS. Enough Posts Like This. For now. Next few will be normal. well as normal as it gets around here #btw the gabe pic was originally Much Worse. I had to add the rainbows n stuff so people didnt think it was..... well. #i need to stand in traffic now. goodeby #happy sunday everyone

[princeparadiso]

okay but did anyone here mention the fact that we discovered that q!Baghera built a tiny replica of her childhood room to house her mini-mes in under her castle and that she named said mini-me with the same ID pattern as her own

because that's a bit fucked up actually

#qsmp baghera #qsmp #baghera jones #like. at best this is a concerning joke #and at worse oh my god baghs this is the worst coping mechanism ive ever seen #she never really talks about her mental health but im very much sure my girl is in the absolute TRENCHES right now #therapy is gonna take so long oh my god #reading D104-H50 felt like a punch to the face

[inklore]

hi can we just talk about how much finnick protected peeta? like not just in the games but after?!?!! he was the only one to not raise his gun at peeta, who stepped forward and tried to help him. he reassured him it was okay to ask questions when he needed to. he ran lines with him, told him he had this. even when he killed someone on their squad and was going after katniss finnick didn’t become violent with him. just retrained him and tried to calm him down, literally telling peeta i got you. and the line “peeta just tuck in there” I’M SCREAMING

#it’s if we count how many times he saved peeta’s life in catching fire it makes his guilt for saying how he wanted to go back for him #and the others even worse #he knew everything that was probably going to be done to all of them and his guilt made him have a mental breakdown #like bro!!!!!!!!!!!! #this boy has so much empathy and care within him ugh #also peeta telling them to leave him behind after finnick died is so important because imagine how that fucked him up #i need to go cry now #the hunger games #finnick odair #peeta mellark #catching fire #mockingjay #here laur goes again..

[ecoamerica]

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#ACLA24 #ACLA24Leaders #youtube #youtube video #climate leaders #climate solutions #climate action #climate and environment #climate #climate change #climate and health #climate blog #climate justice #climate news #weather and climate #environmental news #environment #environmental awareness #environment and health #environmental #environmental issues #environmental justice #environment protection #environmental health #Youtube

[andromeda3116]

look, i know everyone said that the new interview with the vampire show was incredible but holy shit i was not prepared for how incredible this show is

like, not only is louis interesting now, he is incredibly compelling! his once-bland internal dilemma is now given actual weight because it's not just the same old Thou Shalt Not Kill But I Am Hungry story, it's tempered through his righteous fury at how black people have been treated all these years, how many people have wronged him and laughed and expected him to laugh along, how his ties to the community that once saved him are now turning to nooses around his throat, how his family that he once provided for and relied on have now come to fear him

that, combined with his explicit homosexuality, and with lestat being the only one who seemed to accept him and love him for all that he is, and how that is both comforting and incredibly toxic and combined with sam reid's insane charisma and mania and gravity as lestat that make it completely understandable why louis would still be drawn to him in spite of everything

and how they've used the changes from the original to this one to examine how memory shifts regarding someone who was so intense and formative in your life even if they were ultimately so controlling and abusive but still left such huge gouges in your personality like knives

like

fuck

this is the best-written show i have seen in a long time like this is top-tier writing holy shit

#interview with the vampire #iatw #i kept thinking ''eh idk if this is for me'' but now i'm just. frothing at the mouth over the quality and the nuance of the writing #and the incredible acting and the shifting timelines and the nods to the original not as easter eggs but integral parts of characterization #i mean. mind blown #at the sheer level of writing going on here like holy shit this deserves so many awards #FUCK AND CLAUDIA IS JUST #FUCK #like if i had to pick the ''worst time to be made immortal'' it would undoubtedly be 14 #i mean kirsten dunst being 10 is definitely awful but 14 would be so much worse #because you are on the very *cusp* of adulthood #and to be denied ever reaching that adulthood would be an unspeakable torture #like you're just old enough to *know* but just too young to really *experience* #and you're at the very peak of being Your Worst You #like 14 is undoubtedly the worst time to be made immortal #literally nobody would ever even remotely want to be 14 forever that's everyone's idea of hell

[thronealigned]

no it's fine this mind flayer is totally my friend and 100% honest with me all the time it's ok it likes me everything's so normal

#bg3 spoilers #baldurs gate 3 #baldur's gate 3 #i love how raphael directly calls you out on this. 'if id have known you were so gullible i wouldve tricked you into selling your soul for #a bowl of beans when we first met' #and then just keeps insulting you more if you keep insisting emp's really your ally #oc: impulse #sure this'll go in their tag #everything about impulse's Thing with the emperor is so funny to me. and then deeply fucked up if you think about it long enough. and then #really funny again if you think about it even longer #one day i'll do their 2.0 playthrough so i can fully form all my thoughts. and get better screenshots and the ceremorphosis ending #i mean there's nothing stopping me from loading an impulse 1.0 save and going ceremorphosis from there but idk it'd feel wrong #impulse has more tadpoles in their brain than synapses by act 3 and it does really fundamentally change them as a person #tfw your chaotic neutral act-first-ask-questions-never no-impulse-control 17 CHA bestie becomes one of the most detached calculating people #you've ever met. all their old casual wit and humor is still there but they think before they speak now and that really shouldnt feel as #sinister as it does. they have this look in their eye and it feels like they view everyone around them as lesser beings #not because they view other people as subhuman or worse than they are but because they view themself as something *more* #if they have any raw unfiltered emotion left you haven't seen it in weeks. there's one person(?) who gets Unrestrained Feelings privileges #and it's the fucking illithid that lives in their mind and not any of their actual non-monster normal-ish-person friends. that human #connection is fading so fast now. when did they change so much? it happened so slowly in the moment but suddenly now they seem like they #were never the person you became friends with at all #and like impulse is a pretty selfish person from the start but they *did* genuinely like and care about the rest of the party. they were #friends. and by the end of act 3 that friendship should be the deepest and most meaningful it's ever been. but. it just isn't. #so on and so forth etc etc like that. All That Bullshit makes their relationship with lae'zel so interesting (and upsetting) too #they encourage her to side against vlaakith and then they never even try to free orpheus for her and her people's sake. they never even #think about it. they never consider it as an option. they just don't care. and then they EAT HIS BRAIN. #very possibly RIGHT IN FRONT OF HER. #and she's just left adrift. a rebel with no rebellion to lead and very little hope #i'm unwell. #ok i'm done this is a silly meme post. but god i have so many thoughts i have barely been keeping contained

[turtleblogatlast]

No but like every time I think about Splinter and what he had to go through just to keep the boys alive, my heart hurts for him so badly. Is he perfect? No not at all, but none of them are and by god does he love his sons.

The fact that all of them are alive, and grew to thrive despite the circumstances surrounding them is a testament of how much Splinter loves his boys. He raised four babies following the most traumatic time of his life, all alone with nothing but the sewers to house them (to hide them.) I feel like he’s not given the credit he deserves for all he’s done.

And I get that it’s easy to hold up his flaws and faults when it comes to parenting, I myself like looking into them because flawed characters are super interesting and said flaws make them more realistic and engaging, but he tries, and again, so many others would have given up on the boys or failed along the way but Splinter didn’t.

He’s their father, for all his faults he did his damndest to make sure they survived.

#rottmnt #rise of the teenage mutant ninja turtles #rottmnt splinter #rise splinter #he’s not perfect as I’ve said #and he’s got a whole slew of flaws and faults #but he’s a person - we are all flawed #he loves his sons dearly dearly dearly even if he struggles along the way to show that #parenting is not easy! especially as a traumatized mutant who is forced to do it alone #side note but I think this is one of the reasons why it kiiiiiinda ruffles my feathers to see so many people assign parentification to Raph #and in turn make Splinter out to be way worse and way more distant than he is in canon? #like idk I just don’t see what so many others see ig but maybe that’s just me #i guess my thoughts are like- let parents have flaws without villainizing them? #they’re still parents even if they mess up? #we can discuss the repercussions of a parents actions on a child while not casting that parent as an awful person #parents are peopleeee #I could go on but yeahhh #idk it bothers me seeing splinter’s efforts undermined when he’s been through so much #idk if ppl realized this by now but I love me some flawed characters #tho I do think in this fandom the ones whose faults are discussed the most are like #Splinter mostly then Draxum then Leo #of the main cast #and in Splinters case in particular his faults are made to cover his good qualities which makes me sad #because he is SO INTERESTING #they’re all flawed characters and tbh so interesting because their flaws are ALSO their strengths in many aspects

[fenmori]

my faith is sick and my skin is thin as ever

#art #illustration #dragon #angelthing i guess #fenmori #do not tag as spn #i didnt think it could but it got worse and ive been living at the bottom of a hopeless pit for a while now #i hate it. anyway sorry for complaining so much lol