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anakinskywalkerog · 7 months

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My Very Soul (Chapter 34)

Anakin Skywalker x Jedi!Reader

Link to Chapter 33

Warnings: a bit of sad reader, a bit of angsty Anakin, FLUFF, clandestine love affair bullshit!! and a very subtle implied *you know* at the very end (rated teen as always)

Summary: Your training with Obi-Wan constitutes a new beginning; you and Anakin reckon with the fight you had after Felucia (WE HAVE NEW CLONE WARS ANAKIN GIFS TO USE I'm screaming)

Word Count: 4.2k

You felt the crisp, cool, morning air of the Temple hit your face like a bucket of water, as if the wind wanted to keep you awake and upright. You walked slowly through the hallways, focusing on your breathing, on the cold air, the hard marble beneath your feet, on anything but the whispered conversations you heard around you. Not heard—felt. You knew that the few Jedi you passed in the halls were not responsible for the accumulation of the voices in your head. This was just how it was for you, now—you couldn't help but pick up too much, like you were receiver that was too sensitive, picking up too many transmission signals.

It was easier to ignore the feel of all of the whispering voices than it was to ignore the pain you felt in your entire being. Walking through the Temple halls, even, felt like walking through thick, piling sand, your limbs aching. But you knew you mustn't focus on the pain—the pain of your grief, still so heavy, or the pain that twinged in your mind as you thought about the fight you'd had with Anakin last night—you mustn't let it consume you. You had work to do.

You felt horribly guilty for how you had shouted at Anakin the previous evening, how you had pushed him away, how you had told him to get out. Not that he had listened; he'd held you all through the night, and even after you'd calmed enough to dose, you still felt the guilt of it in your veins. So, when you'd awoken to the coruscanti light streaming in through the window slats, and you'd seen Anakin fast asleep, his peaceful, beautiful face finally at ease, you knew it wouldn't be right to wake him. You'd taken one last look at his face, admiring the shape of his jaw, his eyebrows slightly downturned in sleep, his eyelashes that shown blonde in the morning light, before you'd slipped out from under the covers and donned your robe, holstering your lightsaber before sneaking out of your apartment.

There would be time to apologize later. Now, you knew, you needed to clear your mind. You kept walking. As you passed the archives, something that you had been thinking about since you had returned from Felucia flashed through your head. Later, you told yourself, turning to look ahead and stilling yourself for what was to come.

You stopped outside the meditation chambers. You knew you didn't need to knock—knew that he would sense your presence. And, as you heaved another sigh, working to keep your body upright, fighting the weight of that ever-present grief, you heard his quiet voice.

"Enter," Obi-Wan said, and you pushed the button on the panel on the wall, walking slowly into the darkened meditation room. Everything inside was a shade of blue and grey, even the pale light slipping in through the mostly-covered windows. The room contained only a few soft ottomans, and gave the impression of stillness, of calm. Even so, you had to hold your breath as you bowed to Obi-Wan and took your place on the ottoman across from his. Everything in this Temple reminded you of Yuma. Everything reminded you that she was no longer here.

"Thank you for agreeing to meet with me," Obi-Wan said gently, his eyes grazing over your form, your face. You realized you still had yet to visit the refresher, your hair still looking like a nest something might crawl out of. You couldn't find it in yourself to care.

"Thank you for...offering, to help me train," you responded, bowing your head again slightly, forcing yourself to look him in the eye.

"I will do what I can," Obi-Wan replied, folding his legs on the ottoman, assuming a straight-backed meditative position. You followed suit, and found that your body felt comforted in this position, like muscle memory, as if its familiarity made the weight a little bit easier to bear.

"It is my understanding that you were unsuccessful," Obi-Wan began, stroking his beard thoughtfully, "when trying to extricate yourself from Yuma's thoughts and memories in the Force."

"Yes," you said, swallowing hard, trying to ignore the lump that had formed in your throat as you thought back to those training sessions, some that had taken place in this very same room. It felt like a different lifetime, compared to the one you were living now.

"And you were unable, as well, to stop reading other's presences, when you tried." You felt Obi-Wan's thoughts drift lazily toward Anakin, and you checked to make sure your own Force presence was folded neatly and minutely into yourself. The last thing you needed from this training was to reveal too much.

"Yes," you said again, watching Obi-Wan with interest.

"What did it feel like? When you tried to disentangle yourself from Yuma's presence?" Obi-Wan sounded genuinely curious. You swallowed again, pushing your head and back up straight, blinking away the pang that her name sent through you.

"It felt like..." you thought back to those training sessions. "It felt like there were thousands of...tendrils, connecting my presence to Yuma's presence, in the Force. And all of the tendrils were tangled together, knotted and looped...it took so much effort to disconnect one, or two, but before I could make progress, her thoughts or emotions would shift, and new tendrils would take their place. I could never get too many disconnected at once."

"An interesting metaphor..." Obi-Wan mused, his hand gracing over his mustache, his eyes unfocused as he considered your words. "My thought is that we are going about this the wrong way." He looked up, making eye contact with you once again.

"I'm listening."

"I've observed your Force empathy myself..." Obi-Wan said, looking at you as if he could see through you, right to your very soul. "I've found that your own emotions form a strong connection to those you read in others."

You thought back to all the times you'd mistaken others emotions for your own...with Anakin, the first day you'd even met him, or with Henry, when you'd seen his memories and assumed they were yours. You nodded.

"Sometimes...sometimes they even become indiscernible," you confirmed. "My own emotions, and those I read in others." Obi-Wan nodded as well.

"Logically it follows that extricating your emotions from the emotions of others would be very difficult," Obi-Wan said. You thought back over your relationship with Anakin—how at first you'd been afraid your feelings of affection, longing, of love weren't yours at all. Over time, though, your own feelings had grown such that their strength couldn't be denied. They had asserted themselves over you, over both of your lives. You shuddered at the thought, at how difficult it felt, even now, to not be by his side, not be in his arms. How those emotions threatened to swallow you whole.

"If the two are inseparable," Obi-Wan continued, snapping you back to attention, "instead of trying to separate your emotions from the emotions of another, I'm wondering if we can cut both off at the source."

"You mean..." you pondered, thinking this through, "not feel anything?"

"Not exactly, no," Obi-Wan explained, his voice thoughtful. "You are gifted at meditation, yes?" You nodded, wanting to see where he was going with this. "Instead of trying not to feel anything, you might think to separate yourself from your own emotions, when in particularly dangerous or high-stakes situations."

"You're speaking of impermanence," you murmured softly. Obi-Wan nodded. It was an old Jedi principle, one you had learned from a very young age—that the root of all suffering was impermanence. That to fear the impermanence led to anger, and then to hate, and then to suffering. A Jedi must accept the impermanence of all things. Especially emotion, you thought to yourself.

"I think you might have more success if you were to try to separate yourself—your being, your very soul—from those momentary feelings. The emotions you feel, and those that others feel, entangled and entwined as they are." Obi-Wan watched you, waiting for your response.

"So, it isn't about trying not to feel..." you said, thinking deeply. "But rather, allowing my sense of self to detach from my feelings, when the occasion calls for it."

"Yes." Obi-Wan affirmed. "It isn't about escaping your own emotions...but rather, forming a stronghold against them, and the ones you might read in others." Obi-Wan paused for a moment while you thought this over. "The Sith are controlled by their emotion." You looked up, and for a moment, instead of Obi-Wan's blue iris, you saw the purple one that had haunted you in your dreams. "They draw strength from it, yes," Obi-Wan continued, "but they also let it consume them. It seems to me that when you intuit Sith presences, that emotion consumes you too."

You thought back to when Count Dooku had taken you prisoner in your own mind. It had felt like being led down a dark path, one that narrowed, narrowed, until...until you'd been trapped. You didn't want to be rendered useless ever again. You didn’t want anyone else to come into harm's way because you were unable to keep your own mind for yourself. As your resolve hardened, you sat up straight, meeting Obi-Wan's gaze.

"What must I do?"

It was difficult work. Obi-Wan led you through a series of visualization exercises, and then meditations. You waded so deeply into the weeds of your own mind that you felt, for a moment, afraid you might get lost in it once again. But Obi-Wan was there, his voice guiding you, allowing you to continue mapping those deepest parts of yourself. You soon found that you were not one whole, but a composite mix of things; you were not solely a Jedi, nor were you solely the self that Yuma had taught, nor the woman that Anakin loved. You were many different things, different forms, ever-shifting and changing along with your consciousness.

By the end of the lesson, you'd achieved a moment—only a moment—in which you had looked at Obi-Wan and felt nothing emanating from his presence at all. It snapped away as you lost your focus, and you'd been certain that it was a mistake, but Obi-Wan had assured you that he did not have the gift of hiding his Force presence, and that if you had not been intuiting it, you had made great progress. You could admit that the flow of conversation in the back of your mind, the ever-present murmuring, had quieted to only a trickle. This was a great improvement from the storm of voices you had grown accustomed to. After only one day's effort, you and Obi-Wan had achieved more than you and your Master had been able to accomplish in six months.

"Thank you," you said, breathless, sweat dripping down your brow from effort. For the first time since Felucia, you felt a bit looser, like you didn't have to try quite as hard to stand up straight.

"I appreciate your gratitude," Obi-Wan said kindly, "but you know it isn't necessary. I want to do anything I can to help you." You nodded your thanks to him, all the same. Obi-Wan's face became thoughtful. "I've never encountered anything like you, in the Force," he added, considering you.

You paused, taken aback. Obi-Wan, one of the most talented Jedi in the Order, who'd had a Padawan that—

"But...Anakin..." you mumbled, confused.

"I've never encountered anything like either of you," Obi-Wan said, chuckling and rubbing his beard. "You astound even the wisest of us." You laughed too, and felt yourself surprised to hear the sound.

"I know it doesn’t help," Obi-Wan remarked softly, "But I…have been in your position before. I watched my own Master be killed." You went quiet, your eyes fully on Obi-Wan, his head bowed, his hair hanging over his face, his eyes glazed with the memory. "And I was there, and I could do nothing to stop it. The mark that it leaves…it gets easier, with time. Easier to bear the weight of it."

You had never heard Obi-Wan speak of his Master before. Qui-Gon’s passing had happened when you were so young—it had scared you, at the time, with all the rumors surrounding how it had happened, but you hadn't thought, at that young age, of the effect it must have had on his Padawan.

"It does help," you told him quietly. The two of you sat for a moment in comfortable silence.

"How do you feel?" Obi-Wan asked, looking you over with careful concern. You considered his question honestly, allowing your body to express itself to you.

"I feel...hungry," you breathed, surprised at yourself. Obi-Wan smiled widely, and you grinned back at him, feeling, for the first time in a while, like there was solid ground beneath you.

Anakin stalked through the halls of the Temple. Jedi who were in his path moved swiftly to get out of his way; a maintenance droid squealed as the toe of Anakin's boot just missed it, but he wasn't paying attention. He looked down for a moment, but could barely see the tendons in his hands as he clenched his fingers into fists. He barely noticed the way the other Jedi were looking at him, his furrowed brow, his tall stature. He had other things on his mind.

He had awoken in your bed to find it empty. Fear and panic had gripped his heart as he tore apart the sheets, looking through the apartment, calling for you. It was only then that he remembered your training with Obi-Wan, your promise from the previous day. It had calmed him, but only a little. He had dressed quickly, sneaking out of your Jedi apartment with ease. He knew he had to find you.

Anakin's heart raced thinking about how you had been these previous days, how immobile you seemed, how you had been refusing to eat or drink, how you hadn't been able to get out of that bed. It terrified him whenever your eyes started to glaze over; when you didn't seem to fully see the room you were in. He was worried you might slip back into that Force haze at any moment, that space where you had seemed all but lost to him forever. He wouldn't let that happen.

The meditation room was empty; Anakin paused in the doorway only for a moment, before wheeling around and continuing down to the lower level. Where could you have gone? Surely not back to the medical chambers, unless—unless something had happened to you, during your training? Unless your mind had gone back into that cloudedness—

Surely there was no way the council had already sent you into command, was there? Anakin himself had been granted a small reprieve after the events of Felucia. He knew the council had appointed you general of the 415th batallion, Yuma's former position. He knew you had accepted command—what else could you have done? But could the council have sent you back into combat so quickly? Panic gripped Anakin's heart as he considered what it might mean if you returned to battle in your current state. He paused just outside the Temple gardens, half-ready to turn around and head back up toward the medical bay, to the council chambers, to demand to know where you were, when—

He felt a tug within him in the Force. It was a familiar presence; it felt like comfort, and reddish brown hair, the sleeve of a tunic...

Anakin found him on the other side of the gardens, in the corner, sitting with a cup of tea.

"Where is she?" Anakin demanded, looking around quickly. Obi-Wan seemed relaxed, so, at the very least, nothing horrible could have happened to you.

"Good morning, Anakin," Obi-Wan said, his voice sounding tired.

"Where is she?" Anakin asked again, bouncing back onto the heels of his boots for emphasis, feeling unable to keep still, even in the presence of his seated Master.

"I believe she went to get something to eat," Obi-Wan replied, looking warily up at Anakin.

"To eat?" Anakin asked, pausing for a moment, debating turning around on the spot and heading for the mess hall. But if you had gone to get something to eat, then—

"Training went well, then?" Anakin asked, lowering his voice, perching on the bench next to the one on which Obi-Wan lounged, in the corner of the Temple garden.

"I would say so," Obi-Wan said in his infuriatingly calm voice. Obi-Wan took another sip of his tea, looking out at the garden as if deep in thought.

"What does that mean?" Anakin asked, feeling impatient.

"I'm not sure," Obi-Wan replied, his voice still infuriatingly calm.

"Don't be cryptic," Anakin accused, leaning back on his bench and crossing his arms defiantly over his chest. "Do you think you'll be able to help her, or not?"

"I am optimistic," Obi-Wan said, finally turning in Anakin's direction to look him over. "You should be patient with her, Anakin. This was a serious loss for her."

"I know that," Anakin responded, his heart pounding, his anger jumping up a pitch. "I am being patient." Did Obi-Wan think he, Anakin, didn't know what you needed? How could Obi-Wan not see that your well-being was the most important thing in the world? Of course, Obi-Wan couldn't know about your relationship with Anakin...but didn't Obi-Wan realize the importance of keeping you alive, regardless? Didn't Obi-Wan realize how much danger you were in? Anakin took in the posture of his former Master, how calm Obi-Wan seemed, how superior, and felt his frustration grow. Obi-Wan sucked in a breath.

"She's grieving—" Obi-Wan tried, but Anakin cut him off.

"Felucia, Obi-Wan?!" Anakin rasped, his volume increasing. "That wasn't grief!" Anakin recalled again the way you had looked with your body limp, your eyes clouded over, milky white, unable to hear him, trapped in your own suffering.

"I'm looking into it," Obi-Wan responded quietly, lowering his eyes.

"Well, look harder," Anakin said, his breath coming out in a huff. He leaned forward again, looking to Obi-Wan beseechingly. "If she takes command of the 415th, and she doesn't have this under control—"

"If you don't trust her by now," Obi-Wan began, but Anakin cut him off again.

"Of course I trust her! But you know as well as I do—as well as Yuma did—that her gifts are a liability!"

"She is not a liability to the Order—"

"I don't give a kriffing gundark about the Order! I'm talking about her—her life. You need to help her, Obi-Wan. We need to...to find a way to make sure..." Anakin's breathing was heavy. He found himself looking down at his hands, his shoulders moving up and down quickly with his breath. He blinked, his fear overwhelming him.

"We will help her," Obi-Wan said, putting a bracing hand on Anakin's shoulder. "And she will help herself."

You sat, staring into the archive memory, sifting through the holobooks to find what you were looking for. The Temple library was quiet, the atmosphere one of focused attention. Something about it calmed you, but you also found it a bit unnerving, that every bit of galactic knowledge that existed could be found in these very archives.

Your stomach was full for the first time since Felucia; you were sitting upright, able to fight the weight of the grief that had been threatening for days to consume you. You felt exhausted, and sad, but it was a start. And after attending to your needs in the mess hall, you'd come straight here, to the Temple library. Even in the darkest parts of your grief—even when you'd been totally trapped under that weight—you'd known what you needed to do next. You'd been forming your plan. All you had needed was the strength to begin. And, thanks to your training with Obi-Wan, today you'd found it.

You used the controls to pull forth one of the holobooks, and as the holoimages came up, you sat down to focus. You felt yourself getting lost in the text, trying to remember everything. Your focus was so intense that you didn't feel his presence coming until he was right behind you.

"Why are you researching Galactic Sign Language?" Anakin asked, his hand gently stroking your shoulder. Such a small, subtle movement was likely to go unnoticed by those other Jedi in the archives, absorbed as they were in their own research. The sound of his voice made your body electrify—all of the longing, the guilt, and the desire passed through you at once. You shivered.

"It's a long story," you told him, turning around in your chair to face him full on.

"I'm sorry," you breathed, right as Anakin had said the same thing, leaning in toward you, his eyes wide. You felt the corners of your mouth turn up at the sides, and Anakin's face fell open, his surprise taking away his supplication.

"Me first," you said, getting up out of the chair and shutting off the hologram. As you faced Anakin, you felt through his emotions in the Force, sifting through as if the man in front of you were a different type of archive memory—one that was tangled, passionate, complex, brilliant, and beautiful. His emotions mirrored your own; you felt his guilt, his longing, his love for you. The first and most prominent emotion surrounding his presence was worry, and this made you feel even more guilty.

"I'm sorry I shouted at you," you told him quietly, aware of the others milling about the great library. "I'm sorry I took my anger out on you. It's only anger at myself—" Anakin looked as if he were going to cut you off, but you silenced him, holding up your hand. "I shouldn't have gotten angry with you at all. Not when you are so kind," you voice grew quieter, "and so loyal, and so patient with me." Your faces were closer together now; if anyone were to look over, they might wonder why you were having such an intense, whispered conversation. "I'm sorry I fell apart," you continued, feeling the hint of the tears pinpricking the corners of your eyes. You pushed through, closing your eyes to keep the tears from falling. "You shouldn't have to worry about me. I won't let it happen again. I promise I'll be here for you. With you."

"I'm the one who should be sorry," Anakin said eagerly, acting as if he were about to take your hands in his, and then looking around, thinking better of it. Instead, he surreptitiously reached up and brushed under your eye, stroking away the ghost of the tear that didn't fall. "I shouldn't have said anything about...I shouldn't have assumed I know anything about what it felt like for you, on Felucia."

You nodded, but really, he didn't need to apologize. You'd put your own words into his mouth; it hadn't been a fight between you and Anakin, but one between the warring sides of yourself. And you knew now that you needed to face those warring sides head on, and deal with them before they could manage to hurt anyone else.

"You don't have anything to apologize for," you said, pulling half of your mouth up in a small smile. Anakin's eyes were stars, on fire, the blue looking like it was burning, like it would melt out into the air.

"Obi-Wan said training went well," Anakin whispered, hopefully, looking around you for a moment before grazing your hand with his.

"I think it did," you whispered back, looking up into his eyes. You wanted nothing more than to take his face in your hands, but you held back. All this secrecy, you thought, might just drive you mad.

"And you'll tell me about your research..." he continued, glancing back at the archive computer behind you.

"Another time," you assured him, looking around again, making sure no one was close enough to overhear while you leaned in closer toward him. "You know that I love you," you breathed. Anakin's face broke into a joyful smile, his body leaning in closer to yours.

"You know," he said quietly so only you could hear him, "that I love you more than all of the books in this archive." He glanced back at the other Jedi, huddled in their research. "And more than all of the stars in the galaxy, and more than all of the galaxies in the universe." Anakin met your gaze, his sorrow gone, his eyes alight and mischievous. You felt the intention in his Force presence, and it made your insides turn over, your breath becoming short.

"And I love you more than whatever lies beyond that," you whispered, smiling up at him, your heart full. Anakin surreptitiously stroked his hand over the top of yours once again.

"Do you have much more research to do?" Anakin asked, his face forming a familiar, cocky smile.

"It can wait," you murmured, smiling and cocking your head as you strode past him toward the doors, gesturing for him to follow.

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thank you all for being patient with these updates <3 if you are following this story, you and I are besties, that's how it works

let me know if you want to be tagged when I post the next one!

divider credit to @racingairplanes

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samstree · 3 months

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Jewel

(obikin, 1.6k, established relationship, also on ao3) Anakin is on painkillers and forgets something important.

Anakin wakes up warm and comfortable, swathed in layers of blankets and wrapped in strong arms.

The world swims, swaying and tipping to one side in the distinctive way of being put on painkillers. He blinks, and blinks again.

“Mmph…” he makes a confused noise, not sure how he ended up here. Or where here is, even.

“Hey, careful.”

Oh, that is the most beautiful voice he has ever heard.

So Anakin looks up, following the source of the voice and meeting the most beautiful eyes he has ever seen.

“Obi-Wan.”

He breathes the name in wonder, heart fluttering, nearly giddy. Of course, it’s Obi-Wan. He is the most beautiful man in the whole galaxy, and Anakin loves him so much even when his head is fuzzy with drugs. He’d know Obi-Wan when he barely remembers his own name. He needs to tell Obi-Wan that, how important he is, how much joy he brings into Anakin’s life, but all that comes out is—

“Obi-Wan, you are…here.”

An amused huff rumbles against Anakin’s ear, and Obi-Wan’s eyes crinkle softly. It’s Anakin’s favorite look, when happiness is etched into the lines around his eyes. He reaches out to touch, only to grunt in pain.

“Don’t move just yet. Your shoulder is in quite a state, darling.”

The arms around Anakin hold him closer, securing him in place. He then looks down to find his prosthetic arm tightly bound with a sling. The pain spreads from his shoulder to his chest, dulled like a distant echo.

“But I feel fine.” He nuzzles into Obi-Wan’s neck. The world doesn’t spin as much when he rests against Obi-Wan like this.

“It’s all the painkillers you are on. They had to double the doses, with your metabolism so fast. It’s still not working well enough.” Concern seeps into Obi-Wan’s voice. “Let’s not try anything just now. I’d hate to set your bones again.”

With that, gentle fingers run through Anakin’s hair, almost putting him back to sleep with all the petting and scratching.

A glint of silver catches Anakin’s eyes.

“Oh,” he says, struggling to extract the free arm to catch Obi-Wan’s hand. “What is this?”

He frowns at the silver band resting on the fourth finger of Obi-Wan’s hand, heart growing heavy despite the confusion. He pokes at the thing, the warm metal touching the tip of his index finger.

“It’s my ring, dear one. What are you doing?”

“It’s a wedding ring.”

Anakin turns Obi-Wan’s palm, observing the band intently. His head doesn’t feel like his own, but his memory is still intact. A silver band on the fourth finger, that is Stewjoni tradition to indicate that—"

“You are…married?”

Anakin meant it as an accusation. When did Obi-Wan get married? How? Where? Why does he not know about it? But all that came out of his lips is a sad whisper, voice trembling with hurt.

He meets Obi-Wan in the eye, but only finds surprise there. It’s rather unfair, for Obi-Wan to stare at him like that, as if he’s crazy for asking the question. He’d think he deserves an answer after all this time, the love weighing on his heart, never reciprocated. He is fine with it. He really is. It’s just…

He was still hoping, against all odds.

Now that is gone too.

“Anakin, I—You see, we—”

“But you can’t be.” Anakin shakes his head at the silly idea. “Not you, never you. What was I thinking? To be married, you’d need to leave the Order. My old master would never, not the perfect Jedi.”

He adds a dry laugh in the end for good measure, sounding properly putulent now, but Obi-Wan’s eyes only soften.

“Oh, Anakin, I did leave the Order. I left so I could marry—”

“No, don’t tell me,” he interrupts in a hurry. “I don’t think I can bear it.”

It borders on torture now. Anakin knows because he has been tortured. To know the name of Obi-Wan’s beloved would destroy him. All he wants to do is get away. He cannot stay in Obi-Wan’s arms when they belong to someone else. To steal comfort that doesn’t belong to him is worse than not having it at all.

His eyes brim with tears, and he lets them fall freely.

“Anakin, it’s not like that…”

“Just don’t.” He struggles against Obi-Wan’s hold, voice wet with tears, heedless of his injured shoulder. “I don’t want to hear it. Just let me get out of here—”

“Anakin!”

It’s the desperation in Obi-Wan’s voice that stops his motion. That and the fact that Anakin can barely move his limbs, muscles so relaxed they feel like jelly. The ache returns, deep in his bones, but none of it matters when his face is cupped in gentle hands and the most beautiful eyes are right in front of him.

Anakin is powerless when Obi-Wan’s attention is on him, so close yet so far away.

“Will you listen to me? Let me explain?”

Anakin sniffles, and then answers weakly, “…alright.”

Instead of answering, Obi-Wan takes his flesh hand, threading their fingers together. His motion is so tender, so intimate that it erases every last thought from Anakin’s mind.

“It must be one of the side effects of the drugs.” For some reason, Obi-Wan is sounding too amused for the grave situation they are in. “This will be very funny when you come out of it, dearest. Believe me, I want to enjoy it, but not at your expense when your head is messed up like this. Will you look at your hand? For me, just look at your hand.”

Their hands lay on top of the blankets, skin against skin. When Anakin looks down, there are two silver bands, side by side. One on Obi-Wan’s fourth finger, the other on Anakin’s.

“Huh,” he makes a confused sound. “I’m married too?”

“Against all odds, yes. Master Yoda lost the bet to Master Windu on the big day.”

Anakin blinks, brow furrowed.

“But to who?”

He can’t imagine overcoming the heartache of Obi-Wan devoting himself to someone else, but—

“Will you look at the other side of the rings?”

With that, Obi-Wan takes Anakin’s hand again, flipping over both of their palms to show the underside of the rings. There is a small inscription etched onto each of them. The one on Obi-Wan’s is the traditional Tatooine symbol for “rain”, the pattern often carved into Japor wood and gifted to one’s beloved. Rain is the most precious thing, after all. The inscription on Anakin’s band reads “jewel” in Stewjoni.

But how does he know that? When does he know Stewjoni words?

“Oh,” Anakin hums. He feels as if he’s on the verge of a great discovery, a warmth spreading through his chest like a promise from the past. A vow, maybe. “Oh, Obi-Wan! I see!”

“Really? What do you see?”

Anakin breaks into a big smile. “I don’t know! But I’m so happy!”

Obi-Wan’s laugh is like music to Anakin’s ear. Even though he thinks he’s the one being made fun of, he still loves that laugh.

“I’m glad you are happy,” Obi-Wan says, indulgently, “but what if… I did this?”

He takes Anakin’s flesh hand, and kisses him on the fourth finger, right above the silver band, lips incredibly soft. Anakin’s mouth falls open.

“Still happy?”

Anakin nods so hard that he feels dizzy.

“How about… this?”

Obi-Wan trails a few kisses along the back of Anakin’s hand, reaching the delicate skin at his wrist. He looks up through long lashes, eyes impossibly soft, and then—

And then, he kisses Anakin right on the mouth.

The kiss is chaste and light as a feather. It couldn’t have lasted for more than a second, but the world comes to a stop.

As soon as Obi-Wan breaks away, Anakin gapes again. He can only stare at the smug looks on Obi-Wan’s face. When he leans in, Anakin closes his mouth to kiss him, again, and again.

They draw out another kiss, breathing deep into it, the Force singing around them with how right it feels. Their lips meet in a rhythm so familiar, it’s like a choreographed dance. Anakin melts into the warmth of Obi-Wan’s presence, smiling when the soft beard scratches the corner of his mouth. They finally break apart, and now the world is spinning for an entirely different reason.

“Oh, my dearest.”

Anakin lets out a small gasp at the endearment. He is Obi-Wan’s—

“My beloved,” Obi-Wan murmurs, running a thumb on Anakin’s cheek, palm cradling his chin gently. “Don’t you see? There is no one else. I left the Order for you, so we could marry. I left because you are my joy, my hope, the jewel of my heart… who has forgotten all about our marriage after a few doses of painkillers. Tell me, dearest, what shall I do with you?”

All Anakin can do is stare. He stares as Obi-Wan helps him lean against the pillows and adjust his own position so they can cuddle comfortably. He stares as Obi-Wan peppers more kisses on his arm, his shoulder, hand. He stares as Obi-Wan tucks the stray curls behind his ear, with nothing but love on his face, as if the sight of Anakin brings him all the happiness he could ever ask for.

“We are married?” Anakin asks, feeling silly now but still needing the confirmation. “You… love me?”

Obi-Wan looks like his heart is breaking, just a little. “What can I do to convince you?”

Anakin perks up at that. “Kiss me again?”

“That I can do.” A smile, and Obi-Wan obliges.

They kiss until Anakin is dizzy with love, until his bones are humming with contentment. They kiss until The Force wraps around them tightly, reminding him of the familiar warmth from his memories. Of vows made while their hands intertwine, their hearts beating in tandem.

They kiss until another tear trails down Anakin’s cheek. It’s not nearly as precious as the rain drops on Tatooine, or the jewels of Stewjon, but his beloved kisses it away too.

#obikin #obikin fic

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spidersbane · 2 years

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your thoughts are loud

pairing: obi-wan kenobi x reader

summary: you, padme’s top advisor, can’t sleep, and neither can obi-wan.

warnings: none

author’s note: i disappeared off the face of the planet for over a year bc i was in my first year of law school. somehow i survived and realized i needed a hobby. so i’m revisiting my writing and dumping this here. please be gentle, i haven’t seen the prequels in a while bc my friends won’t watch them with me, and i haven’t seen the show yet either. also would anyone like this to become a series? where it’s this kind of pining but with other characters in different fandoms? pls let me know bc I’d love the feedback. much love.

suggested listening: ‘moonlight serenade’ by glenn miller

“Your thoughts are loud.”

You jumped at the sound of his voice, posh as ever but a little rough some sleep. “I didn’t mean to wake you. And what are you doing in my thoughts?” The question came out with a laugh, knowing Obi-Wan well enough that he wouldn’t get in your head without permission.

He looks down and chuckles softly. “You didn’t wake me. I couldn’t sleep, and I just heard them.”

“Dare I ask why you couldn’t sleep?” You slid over on the small stone bench, trying to make some room for him.

He cocked his head slightly, pondering, almost hesitating. But he walked over to you and sat down, tugging his robes closer around him. “Anakin, mostly. Concerns for Padme, sometimes.” A whisper, “concerns for you.”

You tried to shut your thoughts out. You couldn’t, however, helped the heat that rose to your cheeks. “Concerns about me?”

“Yes, concerns for you,” he said. “I know how the Senators are with you.” He folded his hands in on one another in his lap. ‘And I don’t like how they are with you.”

You sighed, finally looking at him, seeing his eyes trained downward, not chancing a look at you. “Obi-Wan, they’re Senators, it’s to be expected. Things are going sideways fast, and they’re all just doing what they can to try and manage it. And sometimes, it just happens to get let out onto others.”

“I don’t like it when it gets let out on you. Especially because I can’t say anything to them.”

He glanced towards you, then upward, focusing on the limited night sky above him. Somehow, you managed to look at him, though, tracing the sharp curve of his jaw, the soft structure of his cheekbone. Although your shoulders touched, you wanted to reach out and place a hand on his shoulder, on his cheek, on something. But you didn’t, and frankly you couldn’t. Even the night’s spell couldn’t make you forget his status as a Jedi Master or yours as Padme’s advisor. Your respective positions had rules, a Code that kept you from one another. But It didn’t keep the others in your charge from one another, you thought.

Padme and Anakin were careful, but you and Obi-Wan knew them better, and knew it hadn’t taken long for them to start seeing each other. In fact, on the few missions to Naboo when the Jedi visited, you often stood as cover for Anakin, ready with a plausible story for when Obi-Wan came asking. You talked Padme through the ups and downs of being with a Jedi, through the long periods of not seeing each other. And she spoke with you about Obi-Wan, not one to be lost on forlorn looks and wishful thinking. Being friends for so long gave her an insight into your thoughts, and knew how your tied your fingers together when Obi-Wan was near, how you could never look him in the eye when he looked at you with his piercing blue eyes.

It took one look for her to read your thoughts, and it was on a night like this, when you sat out in the open with Obi-Wan, where you were grateful he didn’t read yours. Because you reached for him, a gentle hand on his arm, drawing his skyward gaze back to you, looking at you like he pulled some of the stars from of the sky with him. “But I know you would say something if you could, and that’s enough.”

He reached for you too, a shaky hand holding your own, cerulean eyes locked with yours. “But it isn’t enough.”

“Obi-Wan, I …”

“It isn’t enough,” he said, grip tightening around your hand. “It isn’t enough, because I can’t tell them to leave you alone without them wondering what a Jedi wants with you. I can’t say anything because then I’ll come out sounding like Anakin and they’ll all wonder where the professional version of me went.”

He turned to you fully, reaching for your empty hand with his remaining one. He leans in closer, and you mirror him, afraid that if you don’t, then his words will escape into thin air and it’ll be as if you never heard him. And he needs you to hear him, to understand.

He continued, “And then they’d know that the professional version of me never exists around you. That something changes, and I don’t know how to describe it.”

You shook out a breath, terrified of moving too suddenly. He can sense your nervousness, you know he does, when he starts circling his thumb gently across your knuckles. Your eyes dart between his eyes, looking for any sign of his confession being a joke, some cruel joke. But there’s nothing there, except the calmest gaze, the warmest shade of blue searching your eyes for a reaction.

“Thank you,” you whispered.

I love you, your heart screamed.

“Obi-Wan, that means, well, more than I can put into words. But the thoughts are there,” you paused. “If you want to feel for them.”

It’s the first time you’ve offered something like that to him, something that personal to anyone. You can see the hesitation, but it doesn’t take you long to feel him, tendrils of his Force signature wrapping around your mind. You close your eyes, not wanting to see his reaction when he reaches the part of your mind that yearns for him, that aches. He’s there for a while, strolling through, taking his time with you, and it’s in this hike through your mind, that he wishes you could see into his more.

After a pregnant pause, he squeezes your hand, leading you out of your haze, eyes crawling back open. When he sharpens into focus, there’s a content, mischievous smile creeping up his face; his shoulders relax, and you don’t need to be Force sensitive to feel the utter relief radiating from him. You both have finally gotten a lifetime’s worth of confessions off your chest. And where it goes from here, neither of you know. But this is different, and you aren’t afraid of finding out.

The beginnings of dawn creep over the horizon, spilling streams of gold light onto both of you, where you both remember that other Jedi might be beginning to stir. So you stand, hands still intertwined, and you pull him up with you.

“We have to go,” you begin. “Before someone sees.”

He smiles, a full smile now. “Let’s get you back to bed then.”

It’s a silent walk back to your quarters in the Senate building, and Obi-Wan holds your hand the whole time, not even starting to drop it when you think someone is going to round a corner and spot you. He’s unafraid, and so are you, and it’s so unlike either of you, but in the early light, neither of you have it in your to care. When he stops at your door, you both fight smiles and whisper proper goodnights, and you force the want of him staying the rest of the night back down your throat.

When you are finally back in your quarters, as disheveled as they are, curtains still drawn tight, you will to him a promise of ‘later, you’ll find me later’. And it is a whisper, a fleeting feeling through your mind, but you know it’s him willing back, ‘I’ll always find you.’

#obi wan #obi wan kenobi #obi wan fluff #obi wan x reader #obi wan kenobi x reader #obi wan kenobi x y/n #obi wan kenobi imagine #obi wan fic #star wars fic #star wars fanfiction #star wars x reader #star wars #star wars prequels

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padawansuggest · 4 months

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Since some of you MIGHT know the fact that I am obsessed with the eldritch possibilities of the Force in Star Wars (especially since not many people know that the Time Travel fic is about to get Super Fuckin Weird soon and that’s saying something cause I’m writing this after I’ve already revealed that most of the clones are gonna end up back in time) aaaaaaaaaand I am also the type of autist that takes things SUPER literally in a way that makes me hate poetry, take music seriously, and ‘visual poetry’ is not real wdym that’s just an alternate universe where weird shit happens-

Anyways. I have always been somewhat obsessed with Star Wars Visions since it came out, and my fave episode is S2E1: Sith. Earlier I was thinking about the speeder cycle that Lola has in it, and I wanna find out what type of cycle that is so I can put it in a fic (I think in the fic where Jaster finds Obi-Wan in the jungle and adopts him and brings him home, he would eventually get Obi-Wan one for like his 18th birthday or something, saying ‘it’s nearly crash proof’ only for him and Jango and Arla to watch in worry the entire time Obi is on it because ‘👁️👄👁️ the lot worker that sold me it said it wasn’t possible to go that fast on it’ and now Boga is trying to bite it when Obi passes her and they are SO worried)-

But the other reason I wanna rewatch it rn!!! Is because I take the visuals very literally. And I think I wasn’t the only one obviously but apparently a lot of other people completely ignored the visuals, saying it’s part of the metaphor but I’m over here like screeching at my caseboard like ‘THE VISUALS ARE LITERALLY HER HIDING HER PRESENCE IN THE FORCE SHE HAS SHADED HERSELF INTO ANOTHER BRANCH OF THE UNIVERSE TO HIDE FROM HER MASTER’ like. Honey. It’s the force. It’s not just visual metaphor bruh she’s found a way to hide in the edges of the universe and her look of colour on the galaxy is how she continues to sustain herself with minimal interaction with the universe!!!

‘Oh but why can she still fight her Sith master-‘ don’t be dense you shit, when she found a door that was already fully coated in colour despite it being non-living, she was clearly shocked and tried to get into it, without realizing that was a Sith portal BACK into the world of physical being and the only way her master could trap her into dealing with him!!!!!

Anyways. I want to make Lola a character in fics the same way I have Jaster or Fay in fics. They’re not big screen characters or even well known characters, but fans seem to love all of them.

And in the time travel fic it would actually make sense for Obi-Wan to accidentally run into her at a certain point and charm her with his big smiles and complimenting her paintings and grin really big and point to his mouth and say he lost his fang caps recently so his fangs are all tiny again, aren’t they cute??? Anyways. Yeah.

#star wars #obi wan kenobi #star wars visions #swv Lola #eldrich horror #my fics #time travel #a traveling circus

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notyourhetloki · 1 year

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too close

Pronouns: gender neutral

/Obi-Wan x Reader/

A/N: yay I'm here once again, now with some Obi fluff! I love him so much and I hope I made him justice... usually I tend to make my imagines look like fanfics, but it's a little rushed this time... I hope you don't mind. But yeah, would guys like a sequel? Let me know! xoxo Warnings: use of "y/n", reader is Obi's padawan but they are around the same age, pinning, a little bit of angst but lots of fluff :D

—

The truth was, Obi-Wan was desperate

The Jedi master was the only one trying to deny what most had already picked up. Even his superiors were now warning him about “remembering the Jedi ways” for he was “getting too close”

Because he was. He was too close to you, his newfound padawan.

Older than most, you were almost your master's age, for you had been found later in life, not being able to train as a youngling. And for that, most masters declined to train you.

But Obi-Wan felt an immediate connection between you. He knew you were supposed to be his apprentice.

But as time passed and the two of you got to know each other intimately, the dynamics between you two got a little… confusing

You were inseparable, and Obi-Wan occasionally would catch himself looking at you for too long, admiring your face and mapping out your every feature.

What he brushed off as just an innocent crush, had developed into something far greater. He longed for your presence, for the way your eyes met his with such adoration, for your wittiness that ever matched his own, for your voice, your smell…

Obi-Wan felt like he was going insane, not even able to meditate without his thoughts moving away towards you. Especially now that you were going on your first solo mission, he couldn't help but worry.

Later that day, you knocked at his quarters, ready to say goodbye for the time being as you headed for your mission.

What you found was a defeated Obi-Wan, worried to the bone. Which did not exactly help as your own nervousness picked up.

But in a way, seeing your master worried about you made you feel… special. Little did he know, but you felt the same for Obi-Wan, feelings too great to deny and increasingly hard to conceal.

As emotions grew in your chest, you moved to give Obi-Wan a tight hug, which he returned warmly, selfishly savoring the moment in your arms.

After a few moments, you both stepped back to touch foreheads. You were so close now, faces inches away from one another. You could feel as the other breathed, could feel the heat from each other's body…

"Y/N…" a whisper, a short and silent acknowledgment. All he needed to say was your name, for you now knew.

You kissed Obi-Wan suddenly, a chaste peck on the lips that lingered for just a moment, and you immediately regretted it.

"M-Master, I'm… I'm so sorry, I'm…" Panic. You knew all too well about the Jedi Ways, and the last thing you wanted was to disappoint your Master. What if you misinterpreted it all? "Please, forgive m-"

Obi-Wan kissed you with sudden desperation, cutting your sentence for it did not matter. He had tasted you and now couldn't get enough.

Quick but gentle, Obi-Wan cupped your face with his hands, guiding you through a deep, passionate kiss. Both of you were high with the feeling, hearts beating fast inside your chests.

As you stepped away to breathe, foreheads resting on each other again, you couldn't help but wonder after a few moments.

"What now?" your voice shaky with the current events, couldn't hide the fact you were afraid. You loved him, and that scared you. Would you be able to stay away from him?

"What would you like it to be?" his voice steady but gentle, just like himself. It grounded you, reminding you he was right there.

"I… I don't want to be a stranger. I don't want this to end here." No, you couldn't afford to stay away. Not after you tasted him, felt him. You needed Obi-Wan, and he felt the same.

"Then… so be it." a smile grew shyly on his face, which you retributed happily.

Obi-Wan didn't know how this would work, but he would make it work. All traces of guilt and doubt vanished the moment he was in your embrace, the only thing left was you. And that's what mattered at that point.

Was he… in love? He felt the dangerous feeling creeping inside his chest, overwhelmed by it all. But the look on your face reminded him, everything was going to be alright. In the end, in your arms, he was going to be alright.

Maybe it was time he talked to Anakin about all of this…

—

#obi wan kenobi #obi wan x reader #obi wan kenobi x reader #obi wan #star wars #star wars x reader #obi wan x gn reader #y/n #self insert #fic #fanfiction #imagine #gn reader #notyourhetloki

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hannibalzero · 1 month

Note

Gardener Obi-Wan and Ex-convict Anakin actually have my ENTIRE HEART please tell me more about them

Oh geez this was just a Tictok meme that I thought fit.

So forgive me if this is a little fast and messy. ❤️🐰❤️🐰

It started so innocently!

Obi-Wan joined a volunteer group that became penpals with people overseas, incarcerated and elderly. Just emails you know?

Volunteer work was just something to keep Obi-Wan busy, felt like he was helping people. Between working at the library and his garden, there was still a lot of time to fill since Qui-gon-jinn his now ex-boyfriend wandered off being the free sprit he is.

So emailing Anakin was a nice distraction.

Anakin was charming, funny and interested in Obi-Wan’s simple life. Anakin talked about his mother, his love of tinkering and maybe a few clever ideas for Obi-Wans garden!

Hydroponics, how cleaver and the koi fish where lovely!

They talked about everything, Anakin explained what his crime was and how it was never proven. How much he wanted to meet Obi-Wan.

It got more romantic and Anakin asked randomly asked to marry Obi-wan over the phone.

Obi-Wan laughed and agreed, why not? It would put a end to everyone trying to set Obi-Wan up. It would stop all the questions about marriage and children, Obi-Wan would be left alone and be able to enjoy talking with Anakin.

It's not like Anakin would ever been released….

He visited Anakin a few times but they where between glass, those gold eyes were so…trianed on Obi-wan like he was actually beautiful. Anakin was very handsome too.

But Anakin wasn't allowed any physical visitation if you get my meaning.

It would be their two year wedding anniversary in a week, and Obi-Wan plans on visiting Anakin. maybe bring the man a gift too?

Not realizing that Palatine finally balled his favorite “son” out of the penitentiary. (aka don't get caught dumbass)

Anakin wanted to surprise his sweet little wife, pulling up to the nice home in a country. Behind the wheel of ‘Vader’ of course.

Now we pick back up where I left off originally, Obi-Wan looking up in shock at his ex-convict husband. Walking into his garden, face to face.

Shock, panic, joy and lust all making Obi-Wan confused on what to do. He should keep away, no way should be allow Anakin here. What was he doing free?

All thoughts ended when Anakin kissed him…..

Anakin was more than ready for his honeymoon!

#star wars #obikin #obi wan kenobi #anakin skywalker #my writing #fanfic #excon au #vaderkin #omegaverse #answered asks #asks

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lacontroller1991 · 1 year

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Slow Dancing in the Dark (Obi-Wan Kenobi x Medic!GN!Reader)

Main Master List || Star Wars Master List

Author's Note: I do realize that that gif is not Obi-Wan and is not at night, but... I think it works

Warnings: Fluff, sexual innuendo (18+ Please), war talk, slight male nudity

Word Count: 680

=============

In the middle of a war, finding time to sleep is far and between. You sleep where you can and when you can; much like your early medical residency. Now is one of those times where you’re trying to get as much sleep as possible, however challenging it may be. The bed dipping beside you and a feather soft kiss to your bare shoulder rouses you out of a light sleep causing you to let out a tired yawn as the kisses continue. “Obi-Wan. What are you up to?” You turn around on your bed and face your secret lover, still in his robes and armor.

“I just missed you, darling. Is it so wrong that I want to show you my affection?” You both know the actual answer to that because yes, it is wrong, however, do either of you care? Not really. “Come on, get up.” He gently takes hold of your arm and pulls you out from underneath the covers as you groan in protest.

“Obi, I need sleep. I have an early shift in the infirmary tomorrow.” He doesn’t acknowledge your words as he pulls up a song from his holopad and shucks off his armor before pulling you into his arms. Letting a sigh fall from your lips, you look up to your lover before licking your thumb and trying to wipe away the grime from his face. “You couldn’t have taken a shower first?”

Obi-Wan rolls his eyes as he spins you out from his body before pulling you back in, mindlessly swaying to the gentle music while the rest of the Temple sleep. “I figured you could join me in the refresher after our impromptu dance session.” The thought of sharing a shower with Obi-Wan and washing away the dirt and sweat to reveal his gorgeous gorgeous body does make your head perk up slightly, causing Obi-Wan to laugh. “Not so fast, my love. I want to finish this dance first.”

“Fine, but I get to do whatever I want with you, deal?” Obi-Wan nods in agreement as his hands wrap around your waist and your arms wrap around his neck, tugging the ends of his hair mindlessly as the two of you dance together to the music, just basking in each other’s presence, though you could tell something is wrong. “How long are you going to be here?”

“Always straight to the point,” he tries to joke but taking a brief look at your face he realizes that there’s no fooling you. “I leave tomorrow for another month.”

“But, you just got back.” Even though you’re both Jedi, you still can’t help but to feel heartbreak at the prospect of not seeing him for another month. Obi-Wan’s lips downturn as he hangs his head, the music in the background changing as if reflecting the mood in the room.

“I know (Y/N), the Council needs me though. With Anakin on his own mission, they need someone that can get the job done. However; I am talking with the Council about bringing more medics. The ones that we have aren’t enough to deal with all the injuries that the clones sustain. Perhaps I can convince them to allow you to come on the mission with me. Would you be willing to go with me?”

You pull away for a brief moment as Obi-Wan prepares for rejection. He knows that the work that you’re doing in the Temple is important and he doesn’t really want you to join him on the warfront, but he does want you by his side and he feels like that weighs more than anything.

“Yes. I’ll go with you.” Obi-Wan lets out a sigh of relief as you bury your face into his chest, listening to his heartbeat while he kisses the top of your head, savoring the feeling of you being so close to him. “Now, how about that shower?”

Laughing, Obi-Wan doesn’t hesitate to strip out of his robes before dragging you over to the refresher. “I think that sounds wonderful.”

==========

General Tag List: @marvelousmermaid @himbovillain-anon @babblydrabbly @a-reader-and-a-writer @fairchildflag @tavners

#obi wan kenobi #obi wan #obi wan x reader #obi wan kenobi x reader #obi-wan #obi-wan kenobi x reader #obi-wan x reader #star wars #disney plus #star wars the clone wars #star wars prequels #gn reader #ewan mcgregor #obi wan imagine #obi wan fanfiction #obi-wan kenobi series #lacontroller1991

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ionlymadethissoicouldleaveanask · 2 months

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Star Wars Prequels Thoughts

Okay, as requested by @rainintheevening (or more accurately, as forced upon you all by myself), here are my thoughts on the Prequels.

Now I want to preface by saying this - I love Star Wars, I love all of the Star Wars films, and I am far from a Prequels hater. However, I think that there are a few things that could have been done differently to make the franchise as a whole better. This whole thing came up from my wish that Star Wars had been made so that you could watch from Episode I on and not miss anything, as opposed to the way that the Prequels we have are built on the shoulders of the OT. Anyhow.

The first major change that I would make is this: the movies would have focused on Obi-Wan Kenobi as the main character far above any other character. Anakin would have been a sidekick in the Obi-Wan story. We would have started and ended with Obi Kenobi.

TPM -

Phantom would almost entirely follow the plot that is already established. The big change, though, is that instead of Anakin Skywalker being a little junkyard rat from Tatooine, he is already a Jedi padawan.

So here's the shot - at the start of the film, Jedi Master Qui-Gon Jinn and his former padawan Obi-Wan Kenobi, now a full-fledged Jedi knight, go to negotiate with the Trade Federation that has blockaded Naboo. Each of these Jedi has a padawan of his own - Jinn's is the young, brash, Anakin Skywalker. Kenobi's padawan is more mild-mannered and force-attuned. Let's call him Bob Dirtswimmer for the sake of clarity. Kenobi's fiery impulsiveness is played up to a big extent - he's brash, doesn't think things through before doing them, and he negotiates exclusively with his lightsaber. Jinn is more calm and level-headed. Their respective padawans both get along better with the other master, which causes some friction.

Like I said, the plot pretty well follows what already exists – the Trade Federation doesn’t want to comply, the Jedi are forced to ally with first Jar Jar, and rescue Queen Amidala. They escape the planet but are forced to land on the desert planet Tatooine, where they are befriended by a young moisture farmer named Owen. Owen hates Tatooine, hates moisture farming, and he hates how bored he is in life. All he wants is to escape the planet with his girlfriend Beru and become a pilot. While Kenobi and Jinn try to negotiate for parts to repair their ship, Anakin and Owen become fast friends, spurred on by their similar distaste for boredom and the ‘sedentary’ lifestyle that is being pushed on them by their respective mentors (Cliegg pushing Owen to join him as a moisture farmer, Qui-Gon pushing Anakin to be more mindful of the living Force instead of so action-oriented). Dirtswimmer tries to get along with them, but he feels excluded because he is far less inclined to join in on the action of things.

They eventually manage to secure the parts with the help of Owen. As repayment, they allow him and Beru to join them. He immediately and happily settles into the cockpit and gets some flying lessons from the Queen’s royal pilots. On the way to Coruscant to plead for Naboo’s case, we see Anakin begin to grow close to one of the queen’s handmaidens. Then we get the bit where Palpatine, the senator from Naboo, begins pushing Chancellor Valorum to raise an army to fight the Trade Federation’s unjust claims. Dirtswimmer remains on Coruscant to help Palpatine rally support for Naboo while the other Jedi return with the queen to retake the planet. Anakin and Owen fly together against the control ship because they are both skilled pilots, leaving Kenobi and Jinn to face off against Maul.

Now, since Qui-Gon is a bye-gone, Kenobi takes Anakin on as his second apprentice, teaching him at the same time as Dirtswimmer. At the end of the film, Palpatine talks to Dirtswimmer around Jinn’s funeral and mentions how disappointing it is that the Jedi with whom he really connected was now gone, leaving him to be the third wheel in the Obi-Ani Show.

AotC - We're going to get into some big changes that will be important, so keep track of this stuff.

Side note: Master Yoda is often referred to, but never seen. He is described as being the greatest warrior of the entire Jedi Order, but he has abandoned it because he believes that the Order has lost its way.

Again, we follow the same vague film plot - it begins with Naboo's new Junior Senator, Padme Amidala. She and Palpatine, the Senior Senator, are on Coruscant to debate the creation of a clone army for the republic. Palpatine represents the Nabooian populace that is in favor of the law - which is a significant portion, considering the Republic’s failure to assist them when they were being attacked years before - while Padme represents the minority who believe that such an act would be inhumane and lead to dictatorship.

There have been many threats against anyone who opposes the law, so three Jedi are assigned to protect Amidala - Obi-Wan, Anakin, and Bob. There is a brief moment of happiness when they reunite, and Anakin and Padme almost immediately get going with the flirtation once again - something that Dirtswimmer sees is inappropriate, but Kenobi brushes off as unimportant. That night, there is an attempt on Amidala's life. The Jedi manage to protect the Senator and Anakin and Obi-Wan immediately set off after the would-be assassin while Dirtswimmer notices a second assassin following behind. Just as they capture the first accomplice, Dirtswimmer attacks the second - a Mandalorian. Mando and Dirtswimmer engage in a brief fight but Mando manages to knock Dirtswimmer off of him, hits the first accomplice with a poison dart, and escapes.

With this information, the trio of Jedi splits. Anakin is ordered to accompany Padme back to Naboo for her protection, Dirtswimmer is to work with Senator Palpatine to investigate who in the Senate is responsible for these attacks, and Obi-Wan is assigned to investigate the Mando alongside another Jedi Knight - Siri Tachi, with whom he clearly has history.

Padme is initially against the idea of leaving, but Palpatine manages to talk her into going for her protection and assures her that he will recall her before the vote takes place. On Naboo, Anakin and Padme get swept up in their whirlwind romance and whatnot. Owen and Beru accompany them with Owen as the pilot of their ship.

While they are doing that, Bob is pulled aside by our good 'ole boy Sheev. He is acting as Padme's advisor and is a good friend to her, and he notices that Bob is being ignored by Anakin and that when they are together with Kenobi, his opinions are often rejected in favor of the more aggressive attitudes of Kenobi and Skywalker. Slowly and insidiously, Sheephen begins to convince Dirtswimmer that he is the more powerful Force user and that his powers are not being appreciated.

Meanwhile, Obi-Kenobi and Siri are looking for Mando. As they investigate, they share some romantic tension as well. Eventually they track Mando to Kamino where they find the clone army has already been constructed on the orders of the current Supreme Chancellor. They make contact with Jango Fett, a civilian contractor who was hired to be the clone template. While talking to him they are attacked by Mando, who has come to plant bombs in the cloning facilities. Fett earns their trust by fighting Mando alongside them and disabling the bombs himself.

After the battle, Kenobi and Tachi follow Mando to Geonosis. There, they find that a massive droid army has been produced with the intent of waging war against the Republic. They are captured and separated, and Dooku appears to attempt to turn Kenobi to his side. The conversation goes about as well as it does in canon.

Dirtswimmer contacts Anakin to inform him that the Supreme Chancellor has been voted out of office because he ordered the clone army without the consent of the Senate, and Palpatine has already won the vote to take his place in a landslide. He also mentions that they have lost contact with Obi-Wan. Anakin and Dirtswimmer agree that this is bad news, so Anakin and Padme go to Geonosis to try to find them (where they get captured) while Dirtswimmer is convinced by Supreme Chancellor Palpatine to talk the Jedi Council into leading the Republic’s new army in a battle against the massive droid factories that Obi-Wan reported on.

The Council reflects for a while, and someone mentions that they wish Master Yoda had not left the Order because he, being one of the greatest and most powerful Jedi Warriors, would have known what to do. Finally they refuse the advice to take the army. We get an inkling that Jedi are somewhat vain - they say things like “The Jedi order has protected the Republic for millennia, we will do so now.” Instead of taking the Clone Army, a relatively small task force of Jedi is sent instead.

The arena scene happens normally, from the gladiator fights to the Jedi being outnumbered in the middle of the arena and surrounded by SBDs. Then, suddenly, Bob shows up to save the day along with the Clone Army. He obviously rejected the Council's decision in favor of trusting Palpatine, which seems to have been the proper call.

Obi-Wan and Anakin are honestly appreciative of Dirtswimmer for the first time. While he stays behind to coordinate the clone attack, Skywalker and Kenobi chase down Dooku. When they get to the staging area where Dooku plans to escape, Kenobi is suddenly confronted by Siri Tachi, who has taken the Sith's side. She immediately knocks Anakin to the side, then says that Dooku has already fled and tries to convince Kenobi to join her. She makes several good points about the corruption of the Republic and also saying that they would be able to be together if they left the Jedi Order in her plea and Obi-Wan is tempted, but finally refuses. Tachi gives him the “if you’re not with me, then you’re my enemy,” line and they duel, ending with Kenobi being forced to kill his lady love. It is very emotional.

Bob and the other Jedi lead the clone army to victory.

The end of the film shows Anakin and Padme marrying in a private ceremony, Kenobi mourning Tachi, and Dirtswimmer and Sheephen counseling each other even more.

RotS - Buckle up buttercups, we're going down the rabbit hole now.

Starts with the attack on Coruscant and the A-Team rescuing Sheephen from Dooku. When they get aboard the Invisible Hand Kenobi is distracted by Grievous, leaving Anakin and Bob to fight Dooku together. While Anakin is a good match for Dooku in terms of dueling prowess, Dirtswimmer is very clearly out of his depth. Still, when Dooku knocks Anakin back and makes a move to execute Palpatine, Dirtswimmer manages to leap forward and kill the Sith Lord instead. Anakin is clearly upset that his fellow Jedi - who isn’t nearly as skilled with a saber as he - managed to get the kill, whereas Bob is getting pretty cocky about what he managed to do.

So they land, get celebrated, blah blah blah. Anakin is starting to have nightmares but, even though this version of the Jedi Order is a lot more lax with relationships, he can’t exactly go to any of his fellow Jedi for help because his marriage is still technically a no-no (even though several Jedi like Aayla Secura and Kit Fisto are shown to have developed ‘secret’ relationships like.) As a result, he starts speaking with Palpatine since the man is a close friend of Padme’s.

So, in a few shots to show how the war is progressing we are shown that 1) the Jedi are becoming more and more aggressive in their combat styles, and 2) there is a squad of bounty hunters led by the elusive Mandalorian from the previous film that is proving very effective against Jedi. At one point we get a shot of Aayla being ambushed and killed by this squad so we know they mean business.

There are many mentions that "I wish the great warrior Master Yoda were here to lead us" but again, he does not appear.

At the same time as all this, Jango Fett is the key liaison between the clone army and the Senate. He is a GoodGuy(™) trusted by both the Jedi and the senate.

The film follows most of its plot, with the addition of Sheev influencing both Anakin and Bob at this point - Bob through his feelings of rejection by his master and fellow former padawan, Anakin through his pride and fear of losing Padme (that way we can still get some good "tragedy of Darth Plageuis the Wise" action in here). Obi-Wan is sent out to finish off Grievous. Instead of Anakin, Palpatine wants Bob to be planted on the Council as his liaison with the Jedi. When Obi-Wan leaves he secretly tells Anakin to keep an eye on Dirtswimmer because he’s afraid of the influence that Palpatine is exerting over him.

The Jedi Order realizes that the Chancellor is the second Sith and they send The Squad to kill him. This time, though, Sheev doesn't fight (because there's nothing wrong with a powerful force user not being able to also duel with lightsabers.) Instead, Mando and his squad are there to protect Palpatine. The Jedi immediately attack and start picking them off one-by-one, but both Agen Kolar and Saesee Tiin are eventually killed.

Finally it's just Kit Fisto and Mace Windu back-to-back fighting the rest of the squad. Fisto sees a chance to kill Mando (who he has been hunting, since Mando is the one who killed his lover Secura). Kit smashes Mando against the wall and is about to murderize him when the helmet comes off and he sees that Mando is Jango Fett. In Fisto's moment of confusion, Fett manages to stab him with a vibro blade. Windu kills Fett, but Palpatine uses his Force lightning to kill Windu. A real paper-beats-rock-beats-scissors moment.

Interspersed with this duel is Kenobi's attack on Grievous. Kenobi is clearly taking out all of his negative emotions from the past few years on the cyborg, who seems to be enjoying it at first because he thinks he stands a chance. Eventually, though, it becomes clear that Grievous is outmatched. Kenobi kills him somewhat brutally. Maybe reminiscent of that CGI cutscene version of Grievous’s death.

Meanwhile, Bob arrives at Palpatine’s office just after Windu’s death and reveals that he was part of the plan all along and has become Palpatine’s new apprentice. Sheephen tells Bob to go to Mustafar to destroy the Separatist leadership (which was sent there by Grievous when Kenobi first attacked) in order to end the war.

Anakin watches this interaction from a distance. He sends a communication to Obi-Wan to warn him that Palpatine is the Sith and that Bob is going to Mustafar on his orders. Obi-Wan starts to tell Anakin to wait for his return when suddenly Palpatine gives the big "The time has come, Commander" speech, and Obi-Kenobi gets blasted out of the sky by Cody.

We get the Order 66 sequence which is largely unchanged. Owen helps Kenobi escape and together they fly away, clones everywhere are turning on and killing their Jedi leaders. Meanwhile, Anakin leaves his extremely pregnant wife on Coruscant, promising, "I'm doing this for us," and takes off after Bob.

Bob and Anakin arrive on Mustafar at the same time, where they find the Separatist leaders already massacred by their own droid armies. Anakin acts completely surprised by this, but Bob just starts laughing and says, "I thought they were my final test, but I was wrong. It’s you." He ignites his lightsaber and says, "Only one of us is leaving this place alive."

Cue massive lightsaber battle. Anakin and Bob are jumping all over crap, lava is everywhere, the whole nine. Obi and Owen arrive on the planet just in time to see both padawans fling themselves at each other over a lava river, and both of them seemingly fall in. They try to fly their ship down to rescue Anakin, since it is clear that Bob has turned to the dark side. Before they can, though, a Star Destroyer arrives in-system and they have to run away.

Obi pretty much breaks down. He has lost his master, killed his girlfriend, lost a padawan to the dark side and just watched that fallen Jedi kill his favorite padawan. Owen is also seen with tears on his face because Anakin was one of his best friends.

Kenobi and Owen meet up with Bail Organa, who has secreted Padme away to his fancy moon-based hospital where she is dying in childbirth. Kenobi (who figured out a long time ago that she and Anakin were married but didn't do anything about it) can't bring himself to tell her that Anakin is dead and instead promises that he is on his way and will be there soon. She dies with a smile on her face talking about how Ani is her hero, and Kenobi breaks down big time.

Meanwhile, Palpatine is on Mustafar and a scarred figure drags itself out of the lava river. The person is too disfigured to recognize, but Palpatine is pleased and collects them. They are then sealed into the Vader suit, and Palpatine tells them, "You have finally earned your place at my side. Rise, Darth Vader." We get the dramatic shot of the full Vader suit stepping out of the shadows, with the implication being that Bob is the one inside because he was the one who wanted to join Palps.

Organa and his wife take Leia because they have just suffered a miscarriage that no one knows about, so it will be easy to protect her as their child. Owen offers to take Luke and he and Beru return to Tatooine - the place that he most hates - in order to protect Luke from Bob and the Emperor. Though Kenobi accompanies Owen to protect Luke, there is now a level of animosity between them because they both blame Obi-Wan for Anakin's death.

The episode ends with Owen and Beru holding Luke and watching Tatooine's twin sunset.

So. All of that being said. The big reason why I think that the Prequels would be better for these changes is this: I want all of Star Wars to be centered around the big reveal that Darth Vader is Anakin Skywalker. The Phantom Menace was written with the idea that everybody already knew - I think that it would have been a lot more fun if we got three whole movies that led you to believe that Anakin Skywalker was dead and gone. That Bob Dirtswimmer was in the suit, he had killed Luke’s father, and he was the evil one. Then, “No, I am your father,” would hit so much harder. I also think it would be more fun to have Yoda missing all the way through the Prequels but built up with the expectation of him being this incredible warrior because it builds into the twist in Empire - by the time we get there, we are expecting someone incredible. Even Master Windu was talking about what a great warrior this Yoda was… the fact that he is actually just a muppet with a great understanding of the Force would feel much more impactful.

So there we go. That’s the type of Prequel trilogy I would have wanted. If you actually managed to read all of this… you have my sincerest apologies.

#star wars #star wars prequels #prequel trilogy #my thoughts #too many of my thoughts #so many thoughts

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sarcastic-sketches · 2 years

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Creche Guardian

Kitsune!Anakin context here but TL:DR a Force Temple takes issue with Anakin’s human form and transforms him into a Kitsune as that’s more becoming of the Chosen One and better reflects his Force connection. Anakin is not impressed.

A side effect no-one expected from Anakin’s transformation was for the younglings in the Creche to love him. They already had childish awe for him on account of all his nonsense and daring feats. He's a General, the Chosen One, and one of the youngest Knighted Jedi. That has many connotations. But most importantly to them, he now comes with massive fluffy tails??

He has to go to the creche as part of his duties after he's knighted to teach them what he has learned to get where he is… only to have about four kids bury their faces in his tails (which now number three) that are built like cushions almost immediately.

Crechemaster: ... Ah Anakin: Help me

There is no escape Skywalker, enjoy your new Creche duties. And he... does?

I've spoken about my thoughts on Anakin burying any parental instincts he might have once had, in another life, but when he tries to pry the kids off of him they are all just so sad. They don't want him to go and jesus christ does Anakin long to be wanted. Even if he’s a little confused by their antics and overwhelmed by all the questions. Of which none have to do with his Knighthood. Kids are simple in comparison to adults so Anakin stays put. Just for this session, he says to himself, only to be found three hours later by Obi-Wan, fast asleep with colourful chalk dusting his fur and children passed out all around him, using the tails as pillows. The Crechemaster looks delighted.

With the transformation, Anakin had slight concerns because he felt that the Kitsune form was actually just a reflection of the monster he could become from within; his propensity for rage and violence. But the kids don’t see a monster. They see a massive fluffy creature who likes to play with them. Anakin has always had mischievious streak, he likes to play games. It goes a long way to helping him accept the more negative parts of himself and that there are always facets of one's being that won’t always be good - it’s how you choose to deal with those faults that matter.

When he eventually develops more tails as the war goes on, he submits to having some of his free time while on leave from the frontlines be in the creche (He’s not as desperate to see Padme in this AU). Sometimes teaching, sometimes helping the Crechmasters wear the more energetic ones out by racing through the Room of a Thousand Fountains. Sometimes just dozing in the middle of a pillow fort, bracketed by his tails on all sides like a padded chair with the younglings haphazardly lying all over them because soft. They feel especially well rested after having a nap on him and seem even more energetic when they wake up, to the Crechemasters consternation. (Like conductive charging your phone but with the literal walking talking Force Nexus)

He has so many little siblings. They’re so small and so fucking funny. He’s realising that kids are hysterical actually and he’s now a big brother to lots of baby Jedi who he can introduce to all the Temple droids, as well as show them all the service tunnels and ventilation routes. He can teach them verbal binary with whistles just to piss off the Crechemaster (revenge for not helping him in the first place) and suddenly all the kids are just conversing in short beeps and trills to a pack of mouse droids.

Anakin: My army grows Mace: Skywalker, for the love of…

Kids are simple, but they are also more delicate and he can’t let his lack of emotional control hurt them. They react poorly to his outbursts of irritation.

Anakin: I'm a monster. I made them cry. Obi-Wan: Ah. What happened? Anakin: Two kids had picked a fight with each other. I tried to separate them but they're so wriggly. I must have lost my temper or gotten snarly because suddenly all of them were crying. Obi-Wan: ... Anakin: I'm awful. How do I fix it? Obi-Wan: If I had known all it would have taken was childcare to get you to learn patience and mindfulness I would have thrown you in there years ago Anakin: You'll help me? Obi-Wan: Anakin, of course I will

Oh man, imagine when he works out how to do illusions.

It would require a level of control he does not currently possess (ever in canon tbh) but he has enough power to make them very convincing. Maybe he practices for the kids? He recreates stories into visual shows, just weak manipulations of light at first but then the more he does it, the more his natural flair comes through and he can make entire productions fill the creche rooms. He bases his stories off of tales his mother used to tell him (given his mother is still alive it's not nearly as traumatic to talk about).

Every Jedi knows that Skywalker is prone to attachments, so obviously him spending so much time with the kids has a lot of them worried but there are new baby force sensitives coming in and younglings are always leaving to become initiates. It gets him used to the idea that though he doesn't see them anymore they're not actually gone. Things come and go with time.

Still, if anyone were to hurt any of the younglings they would have to deal with a very angry, very big Kitsune guarding the doorway and all his many sharp teeth. I’m not saying he’d kill a bitch in the Temple, but the Order would absolutely never see the intruder again.

Kitsune are possessive, they guard what is theirs.

He may or may not skip chances to meet with the Chancellor when he’s planetside simply because he did promise to spend time with the younglings next time he was in the Temple. The Chancellor will understand. You just don’t disappoint kids.

The Chancellor does not understand and actually accuses the Jedi Order of keeping Skywalker from him, only the Council had no idea that Anakin wasn't meeting with the man anymore. Intentionally or not. Obi-Wan may or may not victory-punch the air when he hears the news and goes to spend time in the Creche with Anakin and all his tiny siblings. Anakin has decided that the part of his Kitsune self he wants to embody is the Protective element. He becomes the Big Brother to so many and solidifies his role as a family member within the Order regardless of how he thinks the Council views him. Loyalty secured.

Then there’s Order 66…

There’s AUs where O66 gets prevented because he manages to get his head out of his ass, but what if he does all that, works on himself, finds a place within the Order he’s happy with and O66 happens... anyway? Palpatine was ready to hit the button regardless in RotS, he just wanted to know if Anakin was in or not. In this AU, he most certainly is not. Plus, Palps doesn't have quite the same strangle hold on him as he does in canon. Got nothing to bargain/manipulate him with either since Padme isn’t his secret wife so their relationship wasn’t a card Palpatine thought he could play.

So, O66 happens and people are in the same places as they are in canon. Only when the call gets sent out this time, Anakin is actually in the Temple already. In the Creche. He has to face down against his own men in blue and white, who are not listening to a word he's saying and actively trying to kill him. Him and the younglings he's with.

Anakin is remembering Fives ranting about clones being forced to kill Jedi and wishing he were here now. Fives who is still out there somewhere, having run when Fox conveniently missed his shot but no-one has seen him since. Anakin is thinking of Rex, who is with Ahsoka, and how this could destroy them both. To say he's a little conflicted is an understatement but it probably only takes one very near shot at one of the kids for Anakin to bug out.

You do not go after his kids.

He doesn't normally go full fox mode in the halls anymore because he's gotten fairly big, but it certainly works as a body shield to stop any more shots making it through while he shepherds all the younglings into the ventilation system where the clones can’t follow. Anakin tries to go easy on his men, incapacitate rather than kill because he knows what is wrong here, but good god they are not making that easy and he is so very angry.

It doesn’t occur to him, until much later, that he referred to the younglings as his kids. Those parental instincts hit him hard.

When he feels it’s safe to do so he follows the younglings he squirrelled away by going Teeny Fox Mode and finds them all huddled together at a junction. They’ve met with a couple of Padawans whose Masters had also yeeted them to safety and a group of Initiates who have learnt the value of hiding in the ventilation system from Ahsoka Tano (It’s the Gathering gang, I love them so sue me). As a Knight, they kind of all default to Anakin to know what to do and there are not a lot of options. They can’t stay in the vents forever and they have to get off Coruscant, but to do that they need a ship big enough to cart all of them away that can leave atmo.

Then he remembers there's a Paladin-class corvette being retrofitted as the new Crucible ship in the hangar. The hangar is not as empty as he would like when they get there but the Crucible II is still there and he’s got no other choice but to chance it.

He can now use every trick he’s ever learned to get the clones patrolling there to leave; his illusions, better force control, himself as a meat shield. All to get the kids into a transport and the fuck off Coruscant. Ganodi mentions she has flight sim training and is immediately put in the co-pilot seat. They miss Bail arriving at the Temple by a few minutes as they leave the planet and jump to hyperspace. Anakin wants to find Obi-Wan, Ahsoka, Padme, and Rex. Anakin has no idea what Palpatine has done at this point all he knows is he is now responsible for these baby Jedi and needs help. Please someone help him.

He’s covered in blaster burns, very confused, angry, and sad all at once. One of the Padawans, suggests naptime in a fit of hysteria and Anakin thinks that’s the best idea he’s ever heard. Ship wide naptime. Sure, why not.

#Kitsune!Anakin #star wars #star wars au #sw au #Anakin Skywalker #star wars writing #I've been looking forward to posting this one #order 66

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sendpseuds · 5 months

Note

I'm sorry its rough being in your head right now, but looking at your wips list makes me want to be able to jump in and take a swim around the part where all your star wars ideas live. There's a ton here I love and am super intrigued by - but I haven't heard about this Ventress one shot. What kind of hand are we talking about? Smut? (I can only assume). More? Violence? Destruction of property? Baring of souls?

In reference to this WIP:

Ventress WIP [one-shot] Obi-Wan returns Ventress’s lightsabers after the Ahsoka debacle [which is RIGHT after Satine’s death] and immediately she can tell something is… off. They have a few drinks, spar a few times, until Ventress pushes too far, and things get out of hand. Fast.

[find all my wips here]

This is one that’s been kicking around in my brain for a long time, and the answer is, sorta all of the above?

Basically, before things get smutty, they get SCARY.

While they’re fighting [for fun, you know, blow off some steam] she starts poking at him, the way she always does, “Can’t believe the kid came to me can you?” “Still think the Jedi are always right?” “It’s that weak heart of yours Kenobi, it will be your undoing” until he just Loses It — Attacking in forms he doesn’t usually use, knocking her off balance, not stopping when she yields.

There’s a moment of realization, understanding why her master was always so hell bent on getting him on their side — because he would be absolutely terrifying. If all that power and emotion slipped into the dark he would be a nightmare [a really hot nightmare but that’s brighter here not there].

She manages to snap him out of it, he goes all “I’m a terrible Jedi” confessing to his affair with Satine, telling her about the fight with Maul on Naboo, that he feels like he can’t handle it anymore.

“Sounds like you could use a night off.”

“I could use a drink. Or ten.”

“You know… when I’m feeling all pent up the only thing that works is fighting or fucking— we’ve already tried to first.”

I think we can see where this is going…

Thank you for the ask! This is a fun one.

#wips #ask me anything #wip wednesday #obi wan kenobi #asajj ventress #ventrobi

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thechaoticfanartist · 7 months

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This is how it feels to be Grim Kennet right now: you can only watch. You can only watch as your Master - Obi-Wan Kenobi - cuts off the remaining limbs of Anakin Skywalker - of Darth Vader. You can only watch as he falls, time seeming to slow down even though it was not slow at all, instead it was all too fast and too quick that you can hardly process it. You can only watch as Anakin Skywalker lands on the black-sand shore of the lava river bank, and you can only watch as he gets too close that his robes catch on fire.

You have seen all of these things before, countless times. You have seen all of this in a movie, your favorite movie - not anymore. Now this very moment was real, as every moment always has been ever since you arrived in this universe. You can only watch, frozen in your place beside your Master, as if it was all still a movie.

Except the movie never captured the other details, it never captured the smell of burning flesh, or of the smoke that threatens to suffocate you just as it will your brother. It does not capture the feeling of being so close to the lava that you may as well be on fire yourself, and it certainly does not capture the pain - not the physical pain at least.

You can barely hear Obi-Wan as he shouts at Anakin. Your brain pounds against your skull in sync with your heartbeat. You only know what Obi-Wan was saying because you have heard it all before, every single word of it. From when this was fiction. This is not fiction.

Somehow, you find your voice. “You were a Jedi! You were supposed to help the galaxy not burn it to ashes! I thought we were the same! I thought we both wanted to save people! Killing our family isn’t saving people!”

You did not fully realize how much you saw yourself in Anakin until that moment. You suddenly hate yourself for it, and him. If he could be this evil, then did that mean you could be as well? And, conversely, if you could still stand here at Obi-Wan’s side, did that mean he could have too?

“I hate you!” He roars.

The words hurt more in real life. You find yourself speaking at the same time as Obi-Wan, “you were my brother Anakin! I loved you!”

This was true. You did love him, once, but not anymore. The man that you loved, the man you had seen as a brother was already dead, and likely was before you ever knew him. That, too, hurts.

“But even now I will not save you,” you end up adding.

You don’t remember moving, you don’t remember kneeling down onto the sand just before him, but somehow, you have. You are staring down at his face, the face of the man who has taken everything from you. You have no pity for him, only a deep dark anger that has crawled itself inside of your heart. The kind of anger that any Jedi would warn you about, the very anger both Obi-Wan and Yoda had warned you about before you embarked on this quest, an anger that for the rest of your life you will only ever say was grief.

“Once I may have saved you from this fate, I would have thought you undeserving of this pain, but even I see now that the crimes you have committed are unforgivable. You have slaughtered our family and built a palace on our ashes. I once said if presented with the chance to save a life I would take it. I am now presented with that chance, but I shall not take it.” You do not know why you tell him these things. He does not know about the promise you made to the Jedi Council all those years ago, he never would, but you tell him here anyways.

“You have destroyed us all, Lord Vader, I hope you’re happy.” You stand, and as you stand you stare at him for another moment longer.

You had come here to kill him, you still could, but now, inexplicably, you do not want to kill him. It is not any sort of pity, or compassion, or a single shard of kindness that would be more befitting of a Jedi that prevents you from killing him. If anything, killing him now would be a mercy for far more than just him. Rather, what prevents you from killing him is an empty spot in your heart where your care for the man used to lay, no, you want Anakin Skywalker to suffer. You want him to live, because you know that the rest of his life will be torture, he will spend the rest of his days in endless agony.

To you, this man deserves no less.

You walk back to Obi-Wan, and you leave Darth Vader behind.

To admit that you left him to live, in order for him to suffer, is to admit to the darkness inside your heart, the same darkness that just consumed your brother. Thus, you will admit no such thing. Instead you tell yourself: Anakin Skywalker is dead, you and Obi-Wan killed him.

Tag List (let me know if you want to be added or removed) : @padme--amygdala @soclonely @mrfandomwars @jgvfhl @starlonkedd @shinhatigf @togrutanduin @jedi-valjean @one-real-imonkey @traygaming @aiylasdrawings @keoxus @dykerebel @veiled-in-stars @sentineljedi @spicysucculentz @amelia-song-pond @it-was-rose @saturnsokas @thejediprincessqueenofnaboo @veradragonjedi @arrthurpendragon @shrinkthisviolet

#grim kennet #star wars #my oc #star wars oc #jedi oc #my writing #obi wan kenobi #anakin skywalker #grim and anakin #grim and obi wan #grim & obi wan & anakin #grim & anakin & obi wan #tcwganv spoilers #kind of? i've shared this scene countless times #anyway suffer with me #also if you can't tell this was inspired by the rots novel

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meshlasolus · 2 years

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House Of Memories (14/?)

Obi-Wan Kenobi x Padawan!reader

Warnings: little bit of angst, otherwise nothing lol

Summary: After learning that your senses have been correct, and Obi-Wan is truly in danger, Padme, Anakin, and yourself go to rescue him from the planet Geonosis.

A/n: okay i kinda like this part but still kinda a filler, next part will be good stuff

Words: 2.1k

Anakin came back the next morning, when it was still early, and the twin suns were barely peaking over the edge of the sand on the horizon line. He came bearing nothing but his mother's body, which to everyone's dismay, brought an intense darkness in the atmosphere. You could feel it, the dark that coursed through his veins, branching out into the air and trying to intoxicate any being it could. It was powerful, and you nearly lost your footing for how strongly it impacted you.

There was a simple funeral, family only, with the exception to both you and Padme.

You were filled with a sorrow over the woman you didn't think you would have. You felt connected to her in a way you couldn't explain, like you'd known her, and her gentle motherly love and kindness. You remembered suddenly why you felt this way. All the times you helped Anakin to sleep, removing the bad dreams from his mind, usually of her, you were able to protect the good memories and thoughts he had about her, seeing them vaguely in his mind whenever your signature brushed his. She meant so much to him, and you knew instantly the for the sudden darkness in his presence. You knew Padme and the others were blind to its feeling, its power, but you weren't. You wanted to speak with him about it at least once before you left the planet, but upon R-2's arrival, his beeps and whistles going off in a nervous rant about getting back to the ship, you knew it would have to wait.

You sensed it again, the pull on your signature, coming from far off in the galaxy, begging for help but not letting you connect yourself to it. You ran to the ship ahead of the others, but they joined you upon seeing your haste. You immediately pulled up the transmission that R-2 had been going out about, and as sense of relief rushed over you at the sight of Obi-Wan on the hologram stand.

"Anakin, my long-range transmitter has been knocked out, retransmit this message to Coruscant," he began, and Padme turned, pushing the button that would forward the holo-message to the Jedi temple. "I have tracked the bounty hunter Jango Fett to the droid foundries on Geonosis. The trade federation is to take delivery of a droid army, here, and it is clear that Viceroy Gunnray is behind the assassination attempts on senator Amidala. The Commerce Guilds and Corporate Alliance have both pledged their armies to Count Dooku and are forming an... Wait..."

Your heart began pounding quickly and your eyes widened in fear at the sight of him activating his saber, deflecting the shots of a battle droid, which soon came into view upon the hologram. Your sense of unease returned at an alarmingly fast rate, and you gripped the arm of your seat to try and keep your composure. Padme knew with just one look like you were about to combust.

You completely blocked out anything happening around you for a moment, including Mace Windu's instructions on what you were to do to protect the senator. Anakin answered on both of your behalf, before ending the transmission.

"They'll never make it in time, they half to come halfway across the galaxy."

Padme's words did their job on filling you in for what you missed the last few seconds. You were controlled now by your feelings, and not your right mind, you wouldn't stand for it.

"Anakin, we have to go get him, Geonosis is less than a parsec away," you said, already moving to the pilot's seat, next to Padme who occupied co-pilot. She would support your decision, but as you suspected, Anakin didn't.

"If he's still alive."

Of course, your fellow padawan and his undying optimism would strike again.

"Ani, are you going to just sit here and let him die?" Padme furrowed her brows and turned her seat to face him as he paced the confines of the ship.

You didn't care what would happen, you would leave them here and find Obi-Wan yourself. You prepared the ship, regardless of the orders you'd been given only moments ago. You were not a soldier, you were a Jedi, and followed the ways of the force. The force was pulling you to your master, and you were going to follow it.

"He's your friend, your mentor, he's-"

"He's like my father," Anakin replied, his voice changed, and you sensed a small bit of that darkness you'd felt in him earlier from his anger. Anger leads to hate, and hate leads to destruction. "But you heard Master Windu, he gave me strict orders to stay here."

"Anakin if you refuse to come, I suggest to you that you take Padme back to the Lars home and keep her safe there, but I'm taking this ship, and I'm going to Geonosis. With, or without you. Your choice," you said to him, not mean, but firm in your tone. You had never been so driven in your life to put yourself in danger over another person, and though it may be due to attachment, you felt pride in how confident you were right now. You hardly ever were.

Anakin didn't speak, just looked down, and so you turned back around, preparing the controls and such before it was time for him to make a final decision.

"Master Windu gave you strict orders to protect me," Padme said, looking at you before looking at him. "And I'm going with her, to help Obi-Wan."

"If you're planning on protecting her, you'll just have to come along," you said in addition to her statement.

Padme had also turned around, helping you to get the ship in the air, while Anakin smirked behind the two of you. He'd be damned not to admit it, but the women he'd met in this galaxy were some of the strongest beings ever known. He was always so empowered by watching yours and Padme's strength, though both of you were strong in different ways, with Padme being more resilient as a politician, and you being physically more of a worthy opponent. You both did your duties with strength and pure will.

Once the ship was in the air, and heading towards the correct destination, you handed over the controls to Anakin, knowing he was a far better pilot than you were. That was something you would need to work on in the future if you were to ever go on a starfighter mission with your master. Of course, you need a master to go on missions with, and if you were unable to save Obi-Wan, you were unsure of what you would do.

You sat in one of the small chambers of the ship, leaning your head against the wall and closing your eyes for only a moment. You'd thought that maybe that would bring you peace, and your head would dull out the noise that echoed loudly in the force. You shot your eyes open the very next second, realizing that, no, it did not make it better, only worse. The noise and pressure that weighed on you was heavy, and you supposed your deep connection to the force, and its way of using you as an instrument were the reason for that. Jedi were the force made living beings, but consulars were always known to be deeply connected to it in ways the other Jedi weren't as gifted with.

"Hey," Padme sat beside you in the confined space, and though there was little room, you couldn't seem to mind her company. Her presence was soothing. "This must be the reason for your-"

"Yes," you cut her off, but not to be rude. You didn't want to hear another person say it when you had been feeling and thinking about it all day and yesterday. It plagued you to no end and you wished it away, but that wouldn't happen until you knew Obi-Wan's fate was secure on the safe side of things. "I hate admitting when I'm afraid, but right now it's the only feeling I can seem to have."

"It's perfectly normal to be afraid. It's our human nature to be scared when someone we love is in danger."

She picked up your hand, which was nervously fidgeting by your robes beside you. She squeezed it and smiled at you reassuringly, and you let out a deep breath, trying to remember how to combat this feeling that swarmed in your stomach. Obi-Wan had taught you many ways, in fact, to sure yourself of the ache that your anxiety caused you in situations like this... but truthfully there had never been a situation like this. The time when you were captured, and tortured in the grasp of Count Dooku, it had been you going through the pain and suffering. You couldn't bear to let Obi-Wan endure that. It would hurt you far worse than anything you had to deal with yourself.

"If I can't save him, I will never forgive myself," you looked up at her with eyes full of tears, yet to be spilled onto your cheeks, which were growing red by the second. "If he dies-"

"We will find that before that happens. We have to believe that he is still alive."

"I know he's alive, I can feel it," you told her, and she breathed a breath of relief. It was a tricky thing, yours and Obi-Wan's force bond. It was something that could either bring peace to you, or alternatively, anguish. It would only be a matter of time, and you'd hoped that you would not fail to arrive before they tried to kill him. "My biggest fear has always been that I would fail him, and now that his life is on the line, I can't seem to control myself anymore. Using my feelings has always been a useful tool in battle, but now I sense they have taken me over, and are using me instead."

Padme listened to the words with great focus, trying her hardest to come up with a wise piece of advice, but she had never been one to use the force, or even know much about it. She could only offer you her encouragement, which is what she did.

"You are stronger than almost anyone I've met, and I know you will make the right decisions when the time comes. I'm sure by the end, Obi-Wan will be back by your side where he belongs."

You smiled and nodded in thanks. As young as she was, she was wise beyond her years, as you'd hoped to be by the time you became a Jedi Knight.

Geonosis was a drab planet, not drabber than Tatooine, thank the maker. It was still not a most wonderful placed for your usual Jedi attire. Any place where the suns shined onto a desert was a place you likely did not want to be, but under the current circumstances, you'd do your time here.

The base on this planet was not just a base, but a factory, which you'd vaguely remembered about from Obi-Wan's message.

"Where are you going?" Anakin asked you, trying to make his own way through the place, with the droids and Padme following close on his tracks.

"Wherever the force takes me," you raised an eyebrow, about to go down a pathway which seemed like the way to a trap, but you felt a pull coming from that direction. "Go ahead without me, if it's a dead end, I'll catch up."

You knew it wasn't going to be a dead end, and so did Anakin, but he nodded anyway, continuing on his own path. Dead ends were rare among the Jedi, because as a Jedi, you can use your lightsaber to simply create another path with seconds. There was no such thing as a permanent dead end.

You felt the pull get stronger as you went, but before you knew it, you were backing away out of sight. Droids were pacing the hallway, and it was a wonder you went unnoticed just now. You were hoping to make a diversion somehow and looked around to find some sort of object. There were processing units with manning droids at the end of the hall, and you tried, as discretely as possible, to make it malfunction. You should have known, in all of your years of training, you were never discrete. The droid's mechanical arms went failing about, and within seconds they were distracting the other droids in the hall. You snuck passed them and soon gained access to a doorway, which of course was sealed shut and there was no way in without an access code.

"Kriff," you said, feeling the presence you'd been looking for this whole time. It was right on the other side of this door. He was on the other side of this door. You closed your eyes and tried to focus, but you were quickly interrupted with a hand on your shoulder.

"Lovely to see you again, young Padawan."

Count Dooku.

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#obi wan kenobi x reader #obi wan x padawan #obi wan x reader #obi wan kenobi #obi wan series #obi wan kenobi x padawan!reader #obi wan kenobi show #ewan mcgregor #hayden christensen #darth vader #anakin skywalker x reader #anakin x reader #anakin skywalker

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eventhedevilsafraid · 1 year

Text

Not a proper Jedi

Summary: You are having a hell of a day. The last week has left you exhausted. A manic depressive episode, followed by a full day panic attack, followed by a, blessedly brief, anxiety attack has left you struggling to even attempt to person today. Your best friend finds you in your room, and decides to try and make it better.

Warnings: MINORS DNI 18+ ONLY. MENTAL ILLNESSES: Manic Depression, Severe Panic disorder, Body dysmorphic disorder. mentions of medication. Talks of suicide, briefly. Plus sized reader. Obi-Wan being sweet. Mainly fluff and angst. Lots of tears and confessions. Flashbacks. No Y/N, not a big fan of it, but endearing nicknames and one not endearing nickname is used. PLEASE DO NOT READ IF YOU GET TRIGGERED BY MENTAL ILLNESSES, SUICIDE TALKS, OR ANYTHING OF THE LIKE.

Word Count: 1900+

A/N: This is just part one. If you would like more please let me know I haven’t been in the best head space to work on my other story, so I just wrote this up to try and get those emotions out. I hope you guys like it!

Walking into the mess hall for mid-day meal, you entered the line behind a couple of knights a year or two older than you. You grabbed your tray and followed the flow of the line, reaching for a deep-fried nuna leg. Before you could grab it, the female knight of the pair in front of you snatched it.

“I don’t really think you need anything deep-fried, do you, huttlet?” The insult stung, but you elected not to respond, and just kept moving along in the line. Next up on the line was sliced meiloorun, and again you reached for it and actually had your hand on it, but again it was snatched from you.

“It’s the last one. You don’t mind, do you? I mean, you look like you could do without the sweets, right, huttlet?” She laughed and before you could actually respond this time, she walked away, still giggling to herself and her companion. Hurt and still hungry, you went to the salad bar and grabbed one at random. Placing it on your tray, you looked around the mess hall for a place to sit.

Finding an empty table in the far back of the room, you made your way there, grabbing silverware and a glass of blue milk on the way. Sitting down in the chair that faced away from the rest of the room, you just wanted to eat and go back to training before anything else happened.

You opened the salad box, and saw you grabbed a berberian crab salad. A rarity for the kitchen to make since the Nabooian ingredients weren’t shipped to them often, and you absolutely loved it. You quickly started eating, trying to just finish and get out of there as fast as you could. Unfortunately, sitting with your back to the room and engrossed in your thoughts, you didn’t notice the small group of females gathered behind you. A mixture of knights older, same age, and younger than you stood behind you, intentions very non-Jedi like. You stood and turned to face the group surrounding you, slipping your hands into your robe pockets and flicking on your holo-recorder.

“Look at what we have here, a huttlet with a salad. Why didn’t you just skip meals today? You could stand to lose the weight, you know. A disgrace to the Order, you’re so big it’s no wonder you don’t go on off world missions. I’d be terrified the ship wouldn’t lift off the ground if I were you.” Snickers were surrounding you, making you feel boxed in. “I don’t know if you know this, but the only reason you have ‘friends’ is because they pity you. No one in their right mind would be friends with you.” She glanced at the girls behind her with a wicked grin and more snickers sounded, and you finally couldn’t take it anymore.

“I may be a bit bigger than you, but at least I don’t have the face and personality of a wet gundark.” You stood up, and as you went to walk by them the ringleader shifted and stood in front of you.

“Who do you think you are, insulting me? The council loves me. I can just tell them you told me, in confidence, that you have broken your Oath and who do you think they will believe? Me, the perfect Jedi Knight, or you, the disgusting, fat, Jedi wanna-be?” A smug look rose on her face like she had won, but you had one more thing to say to her.

“Maybe you’re right. Maybe we should go do that right now, because I am sure Master Yoda would love to listen to the holo-recording I have of this interaction.” She paled and you smirked. “I suggest you leave me alone, or I will gladly turn it over. Now move out of my way, or I will make you.” You shoved through the group of stunned Knights, shoulder checking the ones who didn’t move and blocked your path. Before you fully escaped the group, her hand shot out and grabbed your wrist, gripping you a lot tighter than was necessary. Swinging around, you attempt to rip your hand out of her grip, but she was holding on too tight and it was starting to hurt. She walked a couple steps closer to get in your face.

“Don’t think this is over, you repulsive huttlet. I-,” She stopped her sentence short just as Master Mace Windu walked close.

“Hello, Dewdrop. We missed you at dinner last night. Is everything okay?” He looked at the small gathered group and noticed the young knight's hand was still latched to your wrist, and it looked like a painful hold. “Knight Verona. I strongly suggest you release your hold immediately. Physical contact without consent is assault, no matter how small, and if she so wishes, the council will hear of it.” He narrowed his eyes and crossed his arms, waiting. ‘Verona’ quickly dropped your arm and glared daggers at you.

You turned to Master Windu, “Thank you, Master. And I am sorry I missed dinner. It was a long night of training and then I got caught up in my meditation. By the time I resurfaced from the Force, it was well past dinner. Maybe I can make up for it and we can all meet tonight instead?” You knew it was petty. Showing off how well you knew the council in front of these hateful females, but you just wanted them to leave you alone.

“That sounds lovely, Dewdrop. Come, let us go ask the others if they would like to join as well.” He drew his hand up in the direction of the door, and you looked back at the shocked knight's faces, nodded, and swept out of the room following the master who just saved you from harm.

“Thank you, Master. I am unsure as to what started that, or where it was headed, but I thank you anyways for helping me leave it.” He smiled down at you as you walked beside him.

“Of course, the rest of the Council probably wouldn’t have been so kind.” You nodded in agreement. You and Master Windu met with the rest of the council members, with Masters Yoda, Plo Koon, Kit Fisto, Shaak Ti, Depa Billaba, and even Oppo Rancisis agreed to join you and Master Windu for dinner. The main purpose of these dinners were to check in with you, see how your medications were helping or hindering you, and letting you strengthen the ties to them in the Force to anchor you during your bad days. While attachment is forbidden, there was a special case with you.

When you were discovered, as a three year old child, to be Force-sensitive and brought to the temple you were adjusting well. As you grew in age, your power of the Force grew exponentially. When you were 14, you started showing signs of being mentally unwell after a mission went completely wrong and you master was killed, and you were held hostage, violently tortured, sexually assaulted, kept in a constant state of drugged compliance before you were rescued 29 days later.

Master Yoda himself noticed you weren't well, and walked you to the Healing Halls to meet with the chief healer, Vokara Che. After many, many sessions of talking with the grandmaster and chief healer, you were diagnosed with manic depression and severe panic disorder with both panic and anxiety attacks. Unfortunately, mind healing didn’t take these away like you had hoped, so Master Che placed you on antidepressants and antianxiety medications. You had to go to the Healing Halls every three days at first. You had shown how dedicated you were to overcoming your ailments, logging in journals every attack, every episode, and roughly how long they lasted, and you now only went twice a month.

When your visits were decreased, you were told, explicitly, that the Halls were open to you if ever you needed. Master Che also informed the council, and an informal meeting was held that night. According to Vokara, when you were in a manic episode before, she was unable to help surface you, but after many trials and errors, she broke the code and tied her signature to yours in a desperate attempt to help you from harming yourself. When informed of this, the council was shocked, some were outraged she so blatantly disregarded the code to save one person. Master Yoda had weighed in then, stating how strong you were with the Force, how having the tie to Master Che helped you have longer periods of stabilization, and he proposed a secret special case. Encourage you to form bonds with other council members, encourage the council members to have open ears if you wanted to talk, and see if this could be brought forth to the rest of the Order, and make them stronger.

So far, the arrangement has worked out wonderfully. Unless you were specifically triggered, you could go months without an episode. But when an episode hit, you were flooded with hateful thoughts, you were irrationally angry, never slept until you passed out from exhaustion, and were constantly moving. When it finally subsided, you were hit with insanely strong panic attacks, and an anxiety attack followed that. The lengths and severities always differed, but normally lasted from 5 days to a week before you were finally able to see the other side again. Luckily, you were usually able to tell when one was about to start, the Force around you normally felt unstable, shaky. If others noticed and told you, you usually played it off as nerves, and then quickly excused yourself from whatever was going on.

On your way back to your quarters, you would send word to someone on the council, whether through a holocall or a holomessage. They would inform Master Che, and then either Mace Windu or Yoda would show up to your quarters a couple hours later. They would stay in your living space and sink into the Force to exude a calm and peaceful signature, and wrap it around your entire apartment so that no matter where you were in the space, you felt the calming call from the Force. Never once when they were there did you attempt self-harm.

The times you were unable to get a message out to them before you lost yourself, you would race home and end up hiding in the corner of your bedroom. You would stare into space, frozen in place, but your mind never stopping. When the self-hating thoughts invaded you, unable to find peace, and sleep wasn’t an option, you would drag the razor along your skin. You had explained it before, though they never understood. It was a way for you to release the incessant thoughts that invaded your brain. If you didn’t contact them and they found out you had not been seen or heard from in a few hours, Masters Windu and Fisto would almost bust your door down to find you. Twice they had found you with cuts running along your arms and enough blood loss you were unconscious, but still barely alive. Once they had found you in the act, sobbing, with deep scratches running through your hair, along your temples, and down your face. You weren’t allowed to be alone for almost 3 months, and any object even marginally sharp enough to cut you wasn’t given back to you without supervision for almost a year.

#original character #obi wan x reader #obi wan kenobi #obi wan x oc #obi wan fanfiction #star wars fanfiction

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secretsolarsystem · 1 year

Note

19 or 20-year-old Obi distraught from a vision Qui-Gon made him ignore that resulted in Obi being injured meets Lord (during Order 66) Vader.

soooo he doesn't really get injured but (spoiler) he gets kinda umm kidnapped?? so hopefully that's cool <33 I also made this spicy and we have @kyberkenobi to thank for that so GO THANK HER RN!!!!! THANK U MADISON <3

here is your 2.8k canon-divergent, raised a Sith!Vader, padawan to master!Obi-Wan, NSFW!!! masturbation (not underage!!!), vision-enemies/lovers to real life enemies/lovers?? and dyad????? my friend!!

–

The first time it happens – or maybe, the only time it really happens, Obi-Wan is alone. He’s alone, he’s in his bed, and he’s trailing his hand down his chest and down his stomach, all the way to his waistband.

Once he reaches it, he trails his fingers through his newly growing happy trail, pinching the hairs and tugging just to make himself hiss. Obi-Wan likes to tease himself because it makes him take his time; he’s quite revered by the Order for his patience, and he finds this act to be no exception for one of his best qualities.

Though tonight, he’s just a little too impatient. Maybe it’s because he’s riled up from sparring with the other padawans; maybe it’s because more than a few of those padawans gave him looks suggesting they, too, were riled up; or maybe it’s just because he’s an nineteen-year-old human. At the moment, Obi-Wan doesn’t care what the cause of him shoving down his underwear quickly is – all he cares about is wrapping his hand around his aching cock.

Obi-Wan lets out a long sigh, simply holding his cock for a moment. He rocks his hips in small circles, closing his eyes and sinking into the feeling. He remembers one padawan in particular, how she’d been panting after their first round, how her still-growing chest was heaving. Obi-Wan squeezes his hand around himself now, once, and then he lets go so he can spit into his palm. Getting a hand on himself again, he recalls how she’d looked up at him at the end of their third round, cheeks red and pupils blown and lips wet and parted around heavy breaths.

She’d won twice already, signaling the end of their sparring session, but still, she’d squirmed under Obi-Wan’s body and breathed, “Best three out of five?”

Obi-Wan hums out yes now, as he had then, though now he says it as he finally starts stroking his cock. He sets a steady pace, making sure to keep the pressure of his grip light. He may be eager, but he doesn’t want to come yet, not until he gets through the images of their sparring and into the ones he knows will push him over the edge.

The other padawan got her third win during their fourth round, both of them agreeing without hesitation to move onto hand-to-hand. When she’d won, she’d had Obi-Wan’s front pressed to the floor, her hips on his lower back and one arm wrapped around his shoulders, her breathing hot and loud in his ear. “I loved you on top,” she’d muttered, “but you’re lovely here, too.”

Biting his lip around a groan, Obi-Wan’s hand speeds up and he trails his other one down to his thigh, gripping it tightly with his fingers just to hold onto something. As they often do when he’s run out of whatever’s immediately made him horny, Obi-Wan’s thoughts turn to his time on Mandalore, to his time with Satine. All he really has to do is think of her biting words and how she’s shoved him against the wall when he’d returned them, about how she’d wanted him to shut up so she bit and kissed his lips until they were humping against each other, groaning ‘I can’t stand you’ and ‘don’t stop, don’t you dare stop’ into each other’s mouths.

Already feeling himself near the edge, Obi-Wan tightens his grip and keeps his fast, steady pace while the hand on his thigh presses bruises into his skin. He’s panting, he’s biting his tongue against moans, his whole body is rolling into the tightness of his own hand. He’s on the edge, the precipice, he can feel the warm start to spill over into his gut, and then-

And then the vision changes, sharply, so suddenly he doesn’t have time to even realize it and stop jacking himself off. It’s while he’s taking himself to the edge that he sees the padawan from his earlier fantasies again, though now her eyes are closed as she lays lifeless on the ground. It’s not just her, though; the whole Temple seems to be riddled by Jedi bodies, ‘sabers dropped from still hands and the marks of blaster bolts everywhere.

Obi-Wan gasps, the vision gruesome and horrifying, but it’s when the vision of a tall man appears, the shadows of his cheekbones made severe by the light of his red blade and his golden eyes boring into Obi-Wan’s that Obi-Wan’s hand finally stops because he’s coming, he’s gasping and he’s crying and he’s moaning as he spills onto his hand and his stomach and even up to his chest. His toes are curled and his back is arched because he’s come the hardest he’s ever come while he’d looked into the eyes of a mass murderer, of a Sith.

He needs to tell Master Qui-Gon. He needs to tell the Council. He needs- He needs to clean his come off of himself.

–

Obi-Wan told Qui-Gon, and it hadn’t gone well, in Obi-Wan’s opinion. He’d told Obi-Wan that the future is always shifting and changing, and that the Sith hadn’t been around for centuries. “It’s highly unlikely to come to fruition,” he’d said, “and even if it is on the horizon, trust that we will be well prepared to avoid that fate.”

“But Master, if we are to be prepared, shouldn’t the Council know about it?” Obi-Wan had pressed. He could still feel those golden eyes boring down into his very soul, they’d seemed so real, so inevitable. He couldn’t deny how even know they sent a horrified shiver down his spine, though he absolutely denied with every fiber of his being the way they sent heat to his gut.

“Padawan, what were you doing when you had this vision?” Qui-Gon asked, arms crossed. Obi-Wan blushed furiously, eyes glued to the floor. “Were you in a calm state that could allow the Force to speak clearly to you? Or were your emotions heightened, making the Force have to use more aggression to get to you?” Obi-Wan knew his silence would give Qui-Gon his answer, so he didn’t say a word. (Thank the Force; what if Qui-Gon followed up by asking exactly what he’d been doing?) “I think it best if we leave this be, Obi-Wan. No need to fuss over something that most likely will not occur.”

So Obi-Wan listened to his master, as a good apprentice should. He didn’t fuss over the vision, nor did he share it with anyone else. It was something he locked away to himself, for himself. As much as he wish he didn’t, he revisited it often, especially when he was doing what he’d been doing when it first came to him. He couldn’t tell if the vision was expanding upon itself each time or if he was the one adding to it, but he couldn’t be bothered to dissect it, not when Qui-Gon had told him not to and not when he was writing atop his sheets.

Nowadays he didn’t have to think of other padawans or people he’d seen on the HoloNet or even Satine; all he needed were those golden eyes and severe facial features and he was coming all over himself with a cry stifled by biting the inside of his cheek so hard he’d bleed.

Once, he’d been face down on the bed, hips swaying above his knees with his ass up in the air. His spit-slick fingers were thrusting in and out of his hole, and he was too tight and they were too dry, but he was whimpering and drooling onto his pillow nonetheless. He managed to wiggle them in deep enough and angle them just so, so he was brushing over his prostate as he saw the figure swing his ‘saber with such graceful force and a sharp smile filled with satisfaction. It had Obi-Wan shaking, and just as he felt that heat start to spill over, the vision showed him the Sith’s pink, plush lips forming the words, “Did you like that, Master?” and Obi-Wan’s cry was lost to the pillow now bit between his teeth as he spilled onto the sheets below him.

As he laid there, sweaty and. panting and hating himself, he wondered why the vision only came to him when he was getting himself off. Was the first one the only true vision, and his subconscious now connected it to the action? If it was real, did it have something to do with it? If it wasn’t, what did that say of Obi-Wan, who was getting off to a Sith who might kill his family?

And what did it mean that now that vision called him Master?

–

When the vision came to fruition, Obi-Wan had been in the middle of discussing strategy with Cody and a few other men early in the morning, all of them having powered through the night with no sleep. He was still in his clothes from yesterday, and he knew his hair was a mess from how often he tugged at it throughout the meeting.

Times were strange and they were hard. The war was unforgiving, and Obi-Wan feared there would be no end to it. All he had to comfort him were the pieces of Temple life he could take with him, the bond he felt with the 212th, the Force, and the vision he still kept all to himself.

As he waited for Cody to come back from grabbing caf and tea for everyone, Obi-Wan felt a horrible, sharp shift in the Force. He heard Cody’s voice, suddenly sounding impossibly far away and much too close for comfort responding to a staticky voice with “Yes, my Lord,” and without looking up, he knew every man’s blaster was trained on him.

With a great pain in his heart but no hesitation, Obi-Wan grabbed and ignited his ‘saber, going into a defensive stance. As he looked around at his men, at his brothers, he immediately noticed that while they all aimed their blasters directly at him, none of them were pulling their triggers.

“Cody-” he began, hoping there was room for explanation and diffusion before whatever heartbreaking battle was about to break out.

“General Kenobi,” Cody cut him off, and though Obi-Wan had heard him say those exact words hundreds of times, they were now said with no warmth, no respect. “You are under arrest by order of the Galactic Empire. Surrender willingly and quietly, or we will be forced to bring you in unconscious.”

Not wavering in his stance, Obi-Wan asked, “Bring me in where, Commander?”

Clicking his teeth, Cody sighed. “He didn’t choose quietly,” he mumbled, and then Obi-Wan heard a blaster go off, and then everything was black.

–

Blinking his eyes open, Obi-Wan was immediately aware of his body: his head hurt, his body ached, he was sitting on a chair, his ankles were tied to the legs, his wrists tied together behind his back, and around his neck was a Force-inhibitor. Two clones stood guard in front of him, and the second he opened his eyes and groaned in discomfort, one of them glanced back at him and then promptly left the room.

Shortly after, the clone came back, and Obi-Wan’s heart began to race impossibly fast even as it fell to his stomach. Because there, following behind the clone, was the man, the Sith, from Obi-Wan’s most twisted dreams – no, visions. This confirmed this.

It all made sense in that exact moment: the Sith had something to do with his men turning against him. The others must have done the same; Obi-Wan could only wonder how many of his fellow Jedi were dead, now.

“All of them,” the Sith spoke, his voice less hard now, in person. Obi-Wan drank in the sight of his face, identical to the one he’d imagined kissing and fucking for years, now. Obi-Wan had always assumed he’d been older than himself, but he supposed his younger self was having visions of the man as he currently stood before him: sharp cheekbones; golden curls, golden eyes; pink, pink lips. He was gorgeous, and at least a decade younger than Obi-Wan now.

“You can hear my thoughts,” Obi-Wan said, more confirmation than a question.

The Sith smiled. “I’ve always been in your head, haven’t I?” When Obi-Wan simply blinked at him, the Sith’s smile grew. “It’s okay, you’ve been in mine, too.”

Obi-Wan hummed at this, genuinely intrigued. There was no bond between them, seeing as this was their first ever meeting, but clearly they were linked in some way.

“The Force has chosen us, has made us Her dyad,” the Sith explained, golden eyes sparkling. “And my master is not happy about that at all. He says it makes me weak.”

Pursing his lips, Obi-Wan considered what to ask first: What did he mean by them being ‘chosen’ and ‘made’ into a ‘dyad’? Who was his master? Why was he unhappy about it? What was the Sith to do about his master’s unhappiness? (Why had Obi-Wan gotten used to being the Sith’s master, and why did it anger him to hear him refer to another as such?)

“We are two halves of the same whole, two beings intertwined in all ways – well, nearly all ways, but the dreams help with that, don’t they?” the Sith began to answer, smiling sharply at Obi-Wan. It made Obi-Wan wonder what the Sith’s dreams were like; Obi-Wan gotten off to visions of the Sith’s carnage, but never of them being intimate in any way. The dreams never showed him that, but it sounded like they did for the Sith. “And as we are such, you can stop calling me ‘the Sith,’” the Sith groused. “My name is Vader.”

“Vader,” Obi-Wan said aloud, both of them shivering from it. Vader stalked forward and the two clones gave him ample room to do so. When he reached Obi-Wan’s still seated form, Vader swung a leg over Obi-Wan’s own, straddling him as his hands came up to toy with the collar around his throat.

“My master,” Vader went on with answering Obi-Wan’s unspoken questions, smile on his lips, “is a powerful man – the emperor, in fact.” That alone raised a million questions for Obi-Wan, but he held his thoughts and listened. “He’s not a fan of sharing, and is displeased at the idea of anyone else having any sort of sway or hold on me. Which you do, of course.”

Obi-Wan ignored the way heat immediately pooled in his gut, but Vader did not, if the way he scooted himself even closer and smiled wider was any indication.

“What am I to do about it? Well, kill you, of course,” Vader finally answered. Then, he leaned down, mouth right next to Obi-Wan’s ear. “But how am I to kill you, Obi-Wan? You’re my other half. You and I were made for each other.”

Obi-Wan bit back a groan, mind reeling at the thought of being made for this man and this man being made for him. It was impossible, how right it all felt. “So, the question remains: what are you to do?” he managed to ask after swallowing down his arousal.

Sitting back up, Vader smiled down at him. “We are going to kill him.”

Raising an eyebrow, Obi-Wan responded simply with: “‘We’?”

Nodding, Vader said, “Yes, Master. We.”

Kark, there was that word, Master, falling from his lips while he sat on his lap and was real.

There were only two ways to go about this, at the current moment. One was to not believe a word out of Vader’s perfect mouth, and assume he was being led to his master as a trap. Being led to the emperor would give Obi-Wan a (probably very slim) chance at fighting and defeating him, and trying to fix the wreckage of the Republic he was sure to find.

The other was to believe Vader, and believe the idea of them being inextricably linked by the Force itself. This would require him to also believe that Vader would take him to his master not to be killed, but to kill his master, together.

Either way, it seemed he could get to this so-called emperor with a fighting chance.

He was pulled out of his thoughts by Vader giggling above him. “I’d go with the second one,” he advised, tilting his head. “I know you can’t sense it right now because of the collar, but I’m telling the truth.”

“Why don’t you take this collar off of me and let me see for myself?” Obi-Wan retorted.

“Oh you’d like that, wouldn’t you, Master?” Vader said, hooking his fingers underneath the collar so it pulled tight against Obi-Wan’s neck. Obi-Wan sucked in a gasp, both instinctively and at the feel of it choking him just the slightest.

Vader’s eyes darkened, and his tongue darted out to wet his plump lips, an action Obi-Wan couldn’t help but watch with rapt attention. “Oh, did you like that, Master?”

Force, Vader was literally a dream come true. Though, it would probably be more accurate to say he was a nightmare come true, but either way, he was real and true and in some way, shape, or form, he was Obi-Wan’s.

Around them, the Force sang.

prompted fic collection on ao3

#hmmm. this will be fine and good. probably #ask #prompt #my writing #obikin

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