#and offering new looks and stuff

[moni-logues]

Sometimes being an adult is being 31 and accepting your mother's offer when she says she'll drive 100 miles to your house to help you clean and tidy it because you've spent the last year depressed and overwhelmed and it desperately needs it but you're not sure if you can tackle it all on your own.

Not always

But sometimes that's what being an adult is

#i am feeling so much better on my new medication that I actually think I might be able to do most of it #but I didnt know that last night when she offered or this morning when i left #and I'm still glad shes coming because it will help with the stressed ?!???! i get looking at miscellaneous stuff to sort #moni logs

[c0smiccom3t]

Silly Bandicoot Doodle Batch !!!

(Turns out i can draw the bandicoots in the same exact artstyle as in the "It's about time" game... Well, except for Aku Aku, kind of.... idk.)

(OK thats all the fanart i can make. time to work more on my webcomic until its time to draw more fanart!!)

#crash bandicoot #fanart #coco bandicoot #aku aku #crash bandicoot 4: It's about time #crash bandicoot fanart #art #yes. aku aku adopting crash and coco certainly happened at some point... HE'S THE MASK DAD #btw the reason i say child is because i hc current crash to be 16-17 while Coco here is certainly 14 years old. #btw im surprised my first coco fanart got 44 notes!! it's not much but... WOW! this is awesome!!!! #thank you all for your support on my fanart. #now you better hang onto your rears because IM DRAWING MORE. #and also YOU'RE NOT READY FOR WHAT MY CORTEX FANART IS GOING TO LOOK LIKE . MAYBE ON FRIDAY OR... ANYTIME REALLY. #anyway i love silly bandicoot game series im so excited for what new stuff Toys For Bob has to offer!! #also we need a cartoon tbh. AN EPISODIC KIDS CARTOON. #ALSO... these two bandicoots definitely have autism. BARE WITH ME HERE. #also about the cartoon. i was thinking of making a pitch. #ill do it when i'll have the time... but for now... oc time. :D

[b4kuch1n]

tdov was like a week ago already but I just wanna say when I came over to vacation slash help my sworn brother move flat he told me, "ever since you said you wanted to get top surgery I've been thinking about it. it's straight up number two on my bucket list"

#bakuspeech #number one is a house bc obviously. if u can own a house wouldnt u #he was very drunk at that time of the evening. I was not bc I have the constitution of a hot air balloon and any stimulant will blow me up #(relatively new development. france fucked me up big time turns out) #we held hand on his bed for like the whole evening. it was honestly very funny in hindsight but we were extremely earnest in the moment #and Im like. working on this thing as well. I dont got meds or therapy lmao Im bootstrappin here #but yeah early last year his bf offered to get me meds and I... turned it down... I think I was worried abt like. idk. something #but one year past looking back Im fully like that was a stupid move you shouldve gotten meds. youve once again fucked urself baku #but yeah with that kinda realization Ive also come to realized I've somewhat? accepted. that I'm just gonna be. like this #this in light of a number of likely chronic stuff too (hence my balloon-like constitution lmao) and #that's kinda bled into the rest of me without me really noticing #but him bringing that up fully unprompted... kinda jolted me out of it #its just. really incredibly sweet. that someone doesn't want me to settle for what I make do with #and like. preps for that work. just kinda held my hand and told me it's possible to do this actually #I didn't really express how I felt very well in that moment I think my brain is very bad and I process emotions with like a day of delay #but. well. Im thinking abt it Right Now. so yknow thats the kind of impact that had on me lol #not super sure why I wrote all this down here really. I think I just want a good n nice reminder that object permanence is real #and I exist in my friends' life even when Im going insane in a hole by myself #and with the power of friendship we can alter the universe's plan for ourselves and also kill god #that's that. anyways I eat lunch now and then pass out probably. last night was... eventful lmao #but!! very good things on the horizon hopefully. well manifestly we hold hammers and we use them #have a good day lads. let's go out and slay monsters under a highway

[13eyond13]

Sometimes I still think about how sweet it was when that anon checked on me last year when I was posting overly dark jokes. Thank you whoever you were, that was kind

#i am so much better now but last year was a bad one for me #there was a time in the fall where i literally couldn't get out of bed just because it felt pointless #anyway my mom also forced me to make a doctors appointment and luckily my doctor is super kind and got me on a good medication #but it also was just from stuff like losing my job struggling in school and going through the hurricane etc #im just so glad that i was pushed through that by concerned folks because im enjoying life much better now and that wasnt that long ago #anyway if you're struggling badly right now pls know its not hopeless #reach out for the help youre given and try to see yourself as worth it to fight for #take it little steps at a time #celebrate the small victories like having a shower or taking a walk or answering a call #the best thing for me other than the doctor was just finding ways to be around other people more #instead of feeling defeated i had to think of ways i could fix the loneliness that was affecting me so much #i had to get proactive like i started volunteering and started a book club etc #also i just made myself be very honest with the friends i already had about my struggles and it helps with feeling closer to them #and less alone in it all #because its not that uncommon to have those kinds of struggles and it helps other people open up about their own or just know how you are #the hardest things to do were the most rewarding things in the end #volunteering gave me a reason to get out of the house meeting new people and trying new things and feeling good about myself and #i had to remind myself that i was able to offer things of value and that other people like having me around actually #like the book club is something my friend group looks forward to so much and made new friends through and i started that! #even though i was nervous about it and didnt know if theyd like it at all #other people need you just as much as you need them and thats the truth bby #p

[variousqueerthings]

keep thinking about the nine/ten era being basically erased during moffat's run and tbh in hindsight that's a major reason I struggled to get into it -- it felt like nothing I'd just seen mattered, because there was a reset on the emotional narrative (which, I get it more now, longform tv show, loooot of retconning and restarting and getting on with it, but I don't think that works as much these days as it would have done during classic!who)

but if one takes it at face value, especially now that that face is coming back. how ten's run ends with the doctor making sure everyone is fine without them, just like they always knew they would be, and then packing it neatly away into a box, before having an intensely violent regeneration that ends with the tardis being partially destroyed and having to rebuild itself, and then it becomes canon with eleven that a bunch of the events that happened during nine and ten have been erased from existence, the idea that things cannot be neatly put away like that, they burst out somehow. in the tardis and the sonic screwdriver being destroyed, in the erosion of reality that is the plot of s5, and now with this story, possibly, demanding to be faced properly (which, donna is the main part of that and she's going to be there so...)

it's fun, in the context of that iteration returning for a brief time now, possibly giving a catharsis to what happened to ten (maybe?) to imagine in the context of time itself being the box in which the doctor's pain was put in, that the doctor is in constant interaction with time in some way (sometimes peacefully, sometimes less so). a pain that both exists, and also doesn't, that is reset with regenerations, but also -- we know -- isn't gone, but merely recontextualised. time purged nine/ten like some kind of trauma response (similarly to the war doctor), and eleven sprang out like an over-excited kid with some truly unhinged emotional all-over-the-placeness, followed by twelve and thirteen who emotionally reground a bit (and in the case of thirteen unpack a lot of Heavy Lore). the idea that the box can spring open again, because thirteen leaves peacefully, excitedly even, whereas ten... did not, for many reasons

granted, of course, we don't know yet why that face has returned, but now it feels like nine and ten are actually connected with eleven, twelve, and thirteen in a way they weren't really before (even with ten appearing in day of the doctor). whatever "fourteen" is, it's also emotional continuity

#doctor who #dw #tenth doctor #the doctor #genuinely i think if there hadnt been the reset #id have been able back in the day to get into it more #but instead it was offering Something Completely Different and i just wasn't looking for a new story #(i mean yes a new story -- new doctor new tardis new companion all good full steam ahead #but not new as in 'forget the stuff that came before')

[winter-spark]

CitoIta and Kingdom Hearts Headcanons

Because I like Kingdom Hearts and I like them and they are gamers

(I say CitoIta but honestly, it’s just because it’s about Citron & Itaru, the ship is kinda vague here lol. Like it’s probably optional to read it that way at this point)

(There’s an attempted bonus section about Banri at the end, that’s why I tagged him.)

{Opening in new tab is strongly advised. I used bullet points with sub bullet points. UPDATE: I personally struggled with opening this in a new tab on the blog where all the subpoints are properly formatted, so I pinned it so you can go right to my blog and find it easily if you want. Also I moved the Intro below the Keep Reading link for space.}

Keep Reading (I manually put this one so it would hopefully always open in a new properly formatted tab)

In this post, scientifically backed by my memory, understanding of the characters and other things (eg: feelings, unlisted headcanons, & my understanding of types of people in fanbases/the kh fandom, minus shippers, I’m not touching that... here, I might consider it in the future, probably not but maybe), I will go over basics like how many games they’ve played and their fave games, trios, characters by groups, and moments. Also, there are conversations and little tidbits about how it fits into their world. I tried to pick a favorite battle but note that they probably have more than one those are just notable ones that I thought were worth mentioning. There will be KH spoilers if you’re someone unfamiliar/not caught up with it. 

Citron

Has not played every game but has looked into the story and watched playthroughs of some of the other games.

Hasn’t played the games he has played in order, 

Might not have caught up on the story in order but if so that’d be more because he was looking for specific characters and info

Has definitely played BBS, Days, CoM, UX, & Dark Road. 

Might’ve played (one, two or all three of the following, idk) DDD, Re:Coded, KH

Has definitely not played KH2,

Likes to find/delve into theories

Read the Sleeping Realm Theory 

to Itaru, because he thought it sorta sounded interesting but told Citron he wasn’t reading all that.

I don’t know any other names of long theories besides SRT but you can bet your bottom dollar that Citron has read(or listened to) them for sure

Wants very much to try Sea Salt ice cream

Considering figuring out how to make Wayfinders

UX Union:

Anguis 

and has never switched unions

Favorites:

Game: Birth By Sleep

Trio: Keyblade Knights

Lost Trio is a close second

Character from each group:

Destiny: Sora

Sea Salt: Axel

Keyblade Knights: Aqua

Twilight Town: Hayner

Lost Trio: Namine

but Vanitas is a close second

Organization 13(minus Sea Salt): Xemnas, Zexion/Ienzo or Demyx(probably depends on the day)

Foretellers: Luxu

Xkids: Brain

& He gets bonus points for dressing up his Chirithy

DR Underclassmen: Vor

DR Upperclassmen: Vidar

Xehanort: Xemnas (?)

I know I listed Xemnas as one of his faves in Organization 13 but genuinely I feel it’s a v love hate relationship, where the love is that he can and definitely would(is like two seconds away from it) do an analysis on Xemnas’s actions/behaviors/character

Boss Battle(that he definitely 100% played): 

BBS Aqua ft. Terra vs Terranort

Opening:

Birth by Sleep 0.2 A Fragmentary Passage

Moments/Tidbits:

Involving Fave Trio:

All three:

KH3

Terra gaining control and saving Aqua and Ven

Aqua:

BBS

Doing her job but still standing up for Stitch

Giving up everything to try and save Terra

BBS 0.2

Knowingly chasing after illusions of her friends because she misses them so much.

Terra:

BBS

Gaining hope from meeting Cinderella

Standing against Eraqus to protect Ven

Ven:

BBS:

Running away with Stitch, lowkey being a space criminal

DDD:

Putting his armor on Sora to protect him from the darkness 

Involving someone other than Fave Trio:

KH1:

Kairi protecting Sora/saving him from being a Heartless

Days:

that Sora just subconsciously gave some of his memories to Xion because she didn’t have any

DDD

Neku telling Joshua Shibuya is his home too

Sora going off to thank the Dreameaters

Commonly Quoted(? idk what else to call these, i specifically mean the ones you find in compilations and stuff) Lines from the English Translation: “[’Me? I’m already half Xehanort'] ‘That’s nuts...’”

Bracketed the first part bcuz I think he uses the second part as a reaction sometimes, same infliction and everything

It’s at the point that Tsuzuru’s familiar with it, against his wishes(If Citron says the first part Tsuzuru might accidentally properly respond, that’s how deep in he is, he’s not even sure who Xehanort is(but he does think that’s nuts))

Final things of note: 

Is excited for Atlantis in KH2

Enjoys the attractions in KH3:

Loves that Dark Aqua could be beat w/ a pirate ship 

Loves that there was a roller coaster in the Keyblade Graveyard

Favorite Summons:

KH: Tinkerbell & Bambi

KH2: Stitch

KH3: Ariel & Meowwow

Often forgets he has items but has gotten really good at blocking and healing because of it

Very good with magic

Itaru

Has played just about every game in release date order, 

with just about 100% completion on all of them

Is (lowkey, but acts highkey) appalled Citron hasn’t played the games in order, currently planning time for them to play through all the games together

Has read the manga and maybe some of the light novels

Does look at theories sometimes, might even have a few of his own, definitely has his own headcanons

Secretly wishes he could share a Paopu Fruit w/ someone

UX Union:

Vulpeus

There’s a possibility he might’ve tried the other unions at some point but Vulpeus is his main and current union

Favorites:

Game: KH2

Trio: Sea Salt

Character from each group:

Destiny: Currently Riku, 

Wants it to be Kairi, but it’s just not, is always excited and ready for Kairi news tho

Was Sora for awhile

Sea Salt: Roxas, 

It really is, but he would absolutely main Xion if given the chance

Keyblade Knights: Aqua

Twilight Town: Roxas  Olette 

though he somewhat feels guilty to Pence as feels like he spent more time with Pence but that Olette is just a tad bit cooler

Lost Trio: Rep,

but Namine’s a close second 

Organization 13(minus Sea Salt): Currently Saïx/Isa, but it’s kind of a love hate relationship

There’s also a lean towards Larxene

Foretellers: Ava

Xkids: Skuld

DR underclassmen: Baldr

DR Upperclassmen: Hoder

Yes he cried over their story, no he won’t openly admit it

Chikage did witness it tho

Xehanort: Ansem SoD

Boss Battle (that he definitely 100% played): 

Days Roxas v Xion

Opening:

KH2, 

not because KH2 is his favorite game but rather it adds to why KH2 is his favorite game

Moments/Tidbits:

Involving Fave Trio:

All Three:

KH3

Their whole battle/reunion

to clarify the Lea Isa scene is a part of that

Roxas:

Days

The scene around the Riku vs Roxas battle

KH2:

Roxas v Sora scene

(I debated between this and the DDD scene. Also I feel like his list of favorite Roxas moment is longer than this but)

Xion:

KH2:

The seashell in the opening... for Xion

Days

Xion getting her own answers and spending time with Namine and Riku

Xion leaving all those seashells for Roxas

Axel:

CoM

Letting Namine go

KH2

Sacrificing himself to save Sora

Involving someone other than Fave Trio: 

KH2

Sora and Riku in RoD

Coded:

(Data-)Riku reaching for the moon

UX

Ephemer and Skuld saving Player|Star(light)/bringing them to the new version of the world

KH3 Re: Mind

Playing as Kairi in that boss battle

The fact that Kairi throws her keyblade because she trained with Axel

Commonly Quoted(?) Lines from the English Translation: “Roxas, that’s a stick.”

Final things of note:

Has found all 101 Dalmatians

Has read fanfiction longer than the Sleeping Realm Theory

(which is actually really easy to do, I looked it up and the docs word count is 31,265)

Has his Data-bosses battles on his channel

Proud it only took a couple of tries to beat Yozora (he recorded each try to put his win on his channel)

Uses items all the time, knows when the best time to effectively use items for maximum item usage

“Actual" conversations:

Fave Games:

Itaru: *rambling about some KH2-related topic &/or how he can’t believe Citron hasn’t played 2*

Citron: ooo! Itaru, are you one of those guys who feels Kingdom Hearts peaked at 2?

Itaru: Kingdom Hearts 2 is just an objectively good game, the other games are good too though. KH2 is just, objectively speaking, great. Is it my favorite? Yes, but it’s completely warranted as...

Citron: *smiling as Itaru starts rambling knowing that he’s point two seconds away from going into a 2hr spiel about how KH2 is great*

Itaru: *clears throat catching himself early* A-Anyway, which one’s your favorite?

Citron: Birth by Sleep! I love the ice cream rhythm game :3

Itaru: *understanding that there’s definitely a lot deeper of a reason to that being Citron’s fave* Oh, that’s a good pick. Actually sorta seems on brand for you. Ice Cream Beat is pretty fun.

[Then they boot up Itaru’s copy of BBS and play Ice Cream Beat]

Play Order:

Itaru: So it’s a little late for you to get the full proper experience but we’re gonna play the games in order because it’s really the best way to experience the games.

Citron: Ok, speaking of order and since we’ll get to Birth By Sleep eventually, we both agree that the best way to play the first time is Aqua Terra Ven, yes?

Itaru [has played each route and in varying order, does not quite remember which order he played the game in the first time but is pretty sure it was Terra Ven Aqua]: ...Ven makes a lot of sense to play last...

Citron: Then I am glad we are in agreement. ^^

Itaru: Most people play Aqua last tho--

Citron: Sure chronologically she left Land of Departure last, but story telling-wise *starts talking about why Aqua, Terra, Ven is the best order*

Twewy: (I could do a whole other post on headcanons regarding them playing twewy, it’d maybe be shorter, tho maybe I won’t bcuz I feel like they know more than me lol(I say like Itaru doesn’t know more about KH than me *cries*). If I refer to twewy’s og name wrong here I’m sorry)

Citron: It’s cool that the twewy characters were in DDD. :)

Itaru: Yea. Oh you played subaseka before you met the cast in 3D right?

Citron: :)

Itaru: Right?

[Citron refuses to answer because he thinks leaving Itaru hanging is funnier than a yes or no ever could be]

Ansem SoD as Itaru’s Fave Xehanort:

Citron *three seconds after finding out*: So, is he your favorite because nostalgia as he was the first one you battled or because you think he’s hot?

Itaru: *chokes on being immediately found out because it’s both*

Bonus: Banri & KH Headcanons for no reason other than he also plays games

(With some obligatory Citron and Itaru mentions below because this is their post lol Banri’s not a part of CitoIta. Just to clarify)

Probably has not played all the games

Stares at Itaru whenever he starts talking about secret bosses or hard-to-find treasure chests/secret reports typically until he stops, lists a specific Banri is familiar with or Banri finds a way to shift the conversation. It’s not that he hasn’t come across them he just

doesn’t know which bosses are secret and which aren’t

doesn’t go out of his way to look for treasure chests

Partakes in the memes

Can quote more games than he played honestly, loves those “out of context”/”lines I quote” videos

Has memes saved to his phone

Azami and Taichi borrowed his phone once for picture reasons and Azami was appalled by the Aqua Cinderella meme & the Terra memes (ifykyk)

Probably had Xion’s scream from Days as Sakyo’s someone’s ringtone as a joke (can people set ringtones and ringback tones anymore?) but then he recieved a call from that person in public and was lowkey highkey embarassed so he unset it

He and Citron:

have done a Goofy rendition of Bring Me to Life one time

though Banri sorta begrudgingly participated

At least one Mankai member who was there said he’s not going Karaoke w/ them anymore

are quick to point out or send pictures of “Lucky Emblems” when they see them, it’s almost a contest at this point

Sakyo has asked them to stop sending “lOOk!! a LuCKy emBlem!” in the main chat with a picture of three connected circles, Itaru eggs them on tho

Itaru participates too but he doesn’t have the same luck in seeing them, he is the reason they started tho as in person he pointed one out so later Citron sent a picture of one to show him, so Banri just had to too but he sent two as he already had the pictures and was gonna show them later, so Citron had to find two more to be in the lead and after he found just one more, Banri caught on that they were competing and they spiraled from there

I know logically they don’t appear that often irl but I also know in my heart that it’s happened enough that Taichi, then Kazu and Kumon participated. Now,  the rest of Mankai keeps an eye out for them

Between Tsumugi’s picture of flower bulbs leaning together captioned “Does this count as a lucky emblem?” Izumi asking how many points she gets for a random spot on the ground that sorta looks like a lucky emblem & Omi sending a picture of at lighting set up from work saying “ at this angle this sorta looks like a lucky emblem right?” Sakyo’s feeling a little betrayed because each of those were during times when people weren’t actively mentioning them in the chat.

Winter Troupe is the first troupe to all find at least one “Lucky Emblem”

Autumn troupe (jokingly) blame Sakyo for them not being first

UX Union:

Has probably been in a couple, Ursus or Vulpeus most recently

Favorites:

Game: Dream Drop Distance

but would rather tell you he “hasn’t thought about it, maybe 2″

Trio: Destiny, 

but might not correct you if you guessed Sea Salt,

Character from each group:

Destiny: Riku

He honestly sorta relates in ways. I’m not gonna get too into it but like yea he feels.

Sea Salt: Roxas

Keyblade Knights: Terra, 

but he makes jokes that rag on him a lot so unless you know Banri you would probably think he hates him or just likes to make fun of him. He really does like Terra as a character tho. Feels for him too. But as we know bullying is his love language

Twilight Town: Seifer Pence

Seifer’s a joke fave because of the undeniable proof [they] totally owned [those] lamers (if ykyk)

Lost Trio: Vanitas, 

but Rep’s a close second

Organization 13(minus Sea Salt): Larxene & Xigbar

Foretellers: Luxu (?)

Xkids: Player|Star(light)

DR Underclassmen: Xehanort, “but Bragi’s kinda cool, I guess.”

DR Upperclassmen: *hasn’t actually caught up yet, but he likes Helgi’s design*

Xehanort: Young Master Xehanort(YMX)

Itaru says it’s because they’re both brats

Boss Battle (that he definitely 100% played): 

KH2 Sora v Sephiroth or DDD Riku v YMX [I couldn’t decide which one to list]

Opening:

KH3

Moments/Tidbits:

Involving Fave Trio:

All Three:

KH2

Kairi “calling Riku tf out” ultimately leading to the reunion

KH3

Riku talking with Rep on the beach, Kairi and Sora sees him sitting there by himself

Sora:

KH1

Sora giving his goofy smile before plunging a keyblade into his chest

KH3

Sora dropping down to protect Riku from Dark Aqua in the nick of time

Riku:

DDD

That Riku just subconsciously became a dream eater

KH3

Riku taking a stand against the heartless despite just about all hope being lost

Kairi:

KH2:

Kairi(and Namine) preparing to fight Saix and the berserker nobodies with their bare hands

KH3 Re:Mind

Kairi getting a surprise attack in on Xemnas

Involving someone other than Fave Trio: 

KH3

Yeetus Vanitas

Woody roasting YMX

DDD

YMX & Vanitas spouting “nonsense” at Sora

Lea showing up and Donald & Goofy dropping from the sky, ultimately coming to the rescue

UX

Star ready to square up with the Foretellers

mainly in reference to the Star v Ira speech/scene/fight but the Aced one too

Commonly Quoted(?) Lines from the English Translation: “Mickey it’s Riku, they put bugs in him!” & “Thank you Sora’s heart”

Final things of note:

Always plays on proud mode from the get-go

Not really a completion-ist but does have just about every trophy earned on DDD

Didn’t know you could lose to Yozora in the battle against him

Probably actually more of a Final Fantasy fan than KH, or at least got into KH because the Final Fantasy appearances

Bonus Convos:

Demyx:

Itaru: Yea, I can’t figure out Luxord, for Demyx I’ve seen people guess his name as Myde.

Banri: lol I like the theory that his name is Demyx and he just wandered into the Organization 

Citron: That one is funny, but as far as likelyness goes I like to think his name is Demy and they just slapped an x at the end.

Banri: The laziest naming.

Citron: Exactly!

[and then Banri and Citron start talking about Demyx and it somehow leads them to talking about Goofy’s “death” in KH2 and now they’re talking about KH memes and jokes and Itaru just wanted to know if they had any thoughts on Luxord’s name.]

Vanitas vs Aqua:

Banri: *(possibly somewhat jokingly) insinuates Vanitas is as strong but probably stronger than Aqua*

Citron: *gasp* No!! He is not.

Banri: Really? Then how come he almost took Aqua out?

Citron[genuinely loves Vanitas]: He is a rat! He cannot beat Aqua in a fair fight!

Itaru: I believe he means brat.

Citron: No!! I mean rat, feral ferret child! Can only beat Aqua after biting her and giving her rabies! And even then, she still has at least a week to destroy him.

Itaru: lol that’s quite the metaphor.

Banri: I... *got lost* ???

Itaru: He’s saying Vanitas can only use dirty tricks to even get close to beating Aqua.

Banri: ???

Citron: If Vanitas could beat her he wouldn’t have to result to tricks like firing at Ven, which she was already off her A-game then mind you. But honestly, if Vanitas can’t even get close to beating Terra what hope does he have to actually beat Aqua. I can vouch that he can’t beat Terra. I beat the Terra v Xehanort and Vanitas battle by whacking Vanitas around. It was really easy. Vanitas has only beaten Ven in a fair fight. He’s not nearly as strong as Terra and Aqua. It’s demonstrated through their elements, really. Vanitas is fire...

Banri: *stressed, wasn’t expecting a whole lecture, looks to Itaru for help*

Itaru: *nodding along listening to what Citron has to say*

So yeah those are some of my headcanons involving KH and CitoIta (and Banri with minor Mankai mentions.) If anyone wants to do Taichi(who idk could play already, while I haven’t picked any out I know what type of moments would be his faves, I just can’t figure out yet if he prefers characters he relates to or characters he thinks are cool/want to be like) or Kumon (who I’d feel would want to start after seeing them enjoy it, bet Banri and Citron would have him play chronologically by timeline rather than release order “for science”) or any other characters, really, I’d gladly read it. I can see Taichi & Kumon playing KH but I don’t feel like I know them well enough to do this with them lol. I’m not even sure I know Banri well even to this with him but I attempted it lol. If there’s any questions about my decisions I might answer them, some are easier to put into words than others though. 

Anywho, I dunno how to end this post tbh. Ship CitoIta, Play Kingdom Hearts. idk. 

Thanks for reading all of my nonsense lol.

#(Kh & A3!) #a3! #Citron a3 #Itaru Chigasaki #Banri Settsu #I put a lot of thought into this actually #even the ones that don't have extra notes w/ them #okay I also projected a bit but that doesn't change anything #but I didn't project that much bcuz how did I not find a reason to make any of their fave Ven? like??? #long post #headcanons #act addict actors #would you believe if i said there was more i considered mentioning but decided not to #bcuz there was lol #but some things were difficult to decide #maybe I'll do this with other games i've played #idk we'll see #should i tag this citoita? I mean it's implied citoita #dating? idk. but definitely implied #posting this many months after creation somewhat wishing I had taken notes #I remember some stuff but oof #I'll take notes as I remember more details lol #but look! #I'm putting my Citron thoughts on display #are you proud of me? :3 #part of my motivation to post this is the fact that there is a crossover in kh and a3 fans #and that makes me want to do something with them both #i haven't come up with anything new tho so I just hope this post I started back in April is a solid offering #I have made edits since I initially made the post btw #so it does look a little different from when I drafted it

[anaalnathrakhs]

i keep looking at posts like "i stopped a binge" "i prevented a binge" and all of them are like. "i waited until the urge went away". buddy. the urge doesn't go away. there's no urge. there's just nothing else to do. i don't have anything else to do. every time i stop eating no matter how long i sit with the feeling or not, i always go for more food because there is genuinely nothing else in my life. nothing is enjoyable anymore. the world sucks. no matter what i force myself to do it's the only positive thing i can ever find.

#like okay cool i let the people around me guilt me into eating whatever they think i should be eating #i get it. i'm so fucking stupid for missing out opportunities to try new food. i should never buy the same food twice. #i should always buy all the variety i can and try everything. #i'm so stupid for having eaten the same stuff in a loop for years and years #i'm a massive fucking weirdo for not eating when other people are eating #i keep stealing food from my parents and the people around me i keep taking way too much of stuff intended for a group #nowhere i go will be free of obligations #i have to keep buying my own poison because everywhere i go there's other people's food waiting for me anyway #my parents keep looking at me like a freak no matter if i eat dinner with them or not #they see me binge and nothing happens #we just ignore it #i just eat until Designated Eating Time is finished #hunger doesnt ever have anything to do with it i just eat when food's in front of me #i need the ritual i need the structure it brings to my life #both meals with other people and my ritual binges #i dont know what to do with myself when i'm not binging #and it's like i'm not allowed to not want food #to other people #it's like i must necessarily want all food and anytime i refuse it's restriction #my friends are always like ooooh you can grab some of my fries if you want #or oooooh do you want the rest of my cookie #or ooooooh and how about you are you ordering something #and i'm like :) yeah sure :) like anybody else would :) #and to myself. to myself i don't know. i think i just want to give up. i want to suffer and i want to fuck up so badly. #so badly that no one can deny i need help #i want to be proven right. i'm just a little weakling and all i'm good for is to haunt the halls of a mental hospital. #no responsabilities no pressure nothing but a pitiable suffering victim #i want somebody or something to swoop in and save me #but nobody will come. it's my job to ask for reasonable help from the relevant authorities. and currently they can't offer that care. #so fuck me i guess

[andrewknightley]

You know one of those guys that thinks "he is one of the good ones" and is like man every time we talk i lose more trust in you :|

#and is like i wish at least you knew #you arent one of the good guys at all flfkddksksks #i dont know if im the one who is gonna tell you because i just think i have better things to do with my time but i hope you notice dude #is one of those that shits on other for being mysoginist or whatever when he does worse himself and is like #wow can you believe they insinuate i might be sexist.... #and is like yeah man i can believe it #the new thing was me (gay) comenting 'wow shocking i heard this company is funding conversion camps? do you know something about it??' #and he being like 'well good luck finding people with money who are cartoonish evil 🙄' #and is like my man have 1 standar at least what are u saying ToT #this is also a company that kight offer me a job so is like wow dude are u surprised i might not want to work in somethibg like that #and im looking for verification on the info gkfkdkdkododkskskdkdkls #and he was like 'well you worked with companies founded by X or Y also bad so if you think about it' #and is like yes yes everything is evil i still dont wanna work for people who are gonna use my work to be homophobes whats not clicking ??? #cw homophobia #im gonna say it in spanish tio es que eres gilipollas i hoped you had at least 1 standar but i see Not #talks and stuff

[livelaughlovekill]

panic

#landlord wants to move us to a month to month lease and i am #losing my mind panicking #why would they do this if not to kick us out later #i can't afford to move #i. the deal here was so good. i won't be able to afford another place half as nice or big. #how will i do my business without the square footage? i can't afford a more expensive place. we'll never find somewhere this cheap. #this house is perfect. i love it. I've lived here almost 5 years. it's mine. it's perfect. i can't lose it #will i have to quit my business to get more hours at my day job? #can we offer to buy the house? is that feasible? is that even within the realm of possibility? will we have time to find a new place? #i don't want to move i have so much stuff #i hate moving i hate looking at new homes #what did we do wrong #weren't we model tenants? #i can't afford a new safety deposit #will i have to give up my plan of getting a new car? i just reached my savings goals for that #but if we don't get the safety deposit back here i don't know if i can afford a new one #oh god are we going to be homeless #I've taken my anxiety meds and they aren't hitting fast enough #I'm so scared #and I'm so tired. my fatigue is so bad this week. i feel so weak. my brain so fuzzy. how am i supposed to concentrate on anything #i need to answer my emails and i need to write a newsletter and I need to order supplies and yet #I'm back in bed sobbing and i can't think and I'm so scared #got my breathing under control a little but . fuck . #fuck. #fuck! #fuck my stupid baka life

[dravidious]

I rest my case.

-

Fuckin BULLSHIT the one on the right is way better you only need 1 stroke to draw it!

Speaking of some things being objectively better than others for very important reasons, I booted up my brother’s old copy of Hyrule Warriors yesterday and tried to get A-ranks in the adventure mode, only to gradually realize just how important the level-up system is, meaning that no matter how good you are, the only way to have a chance of getting A-ranks on the later stages is to grind until the enemies don’t take 5 whole minutes each to kill.

Then I ranted to myself in my room about how Ultrakill’s P-ranks are way better

#asks #what kind of legend of zelda game has a fucking level up system? #the game already has 3 other progression systems to make you more powerful #why include a level up system? in a zelda game? #have i ranted about my hatred of number inflation/number-go-up progression on tumblr before? #because i REALLY hate when a perfectly good game has a level up system slapped onto it for no reason #especially this one! #why am i being punished for using a character that i don't play very often?! #absolute nonsense #and when i was playing and trying to a-rank a level i kept getting closer and closer to doing it #and i was like 'yes i'm doing it i'm learning the level and mastering my character!' #'now that i know my character better i'm killing the enemies so much faster! :D' #no. it was just because my numbers were going up :( #'We added a progression system.' #ruined a perfectly good game is what you did. look at it it's got a treadmill attached #some games actually USE their level up systems #pokemon uses it for evolution and to teach new moves #i still don't like the number inflation aspect but at least it's SOMETHING #and Tunic has you finding offerings in hidden treasure chests and choosing how you spend your currency #but hyrule warriors? nothing. it just boosts your health and damage #which i repeat: THERE ARE OTHER PROGRESSION SYSTEMS IN THE GAME THAT ALREADY DO THAT #except you actually have some control over those ones #you get heart containers by finding treasure and getting a-ranks #and you get better weapons by getting loot from enemies and getting a-ranks #and there's ALSO the badge system which does a whole bunch of Stuff #i swear the only reason to have the level up system is to artificially extend the playtime #i guess there might be a skill barrier because the other progression methods require a-ranks #but forcing less-skilled players to spend hours grinding to get up to the level of better players is NOT the solution

[fatcowboys]

my PA for ajovy got denied (booo) but the reason it did was bc a neurologist needed to prescribe it which i already had an apt set up for and gad yesterday (yay!) and the appointment went really well and i like the provider a LOT of migraine management (YAY!!!) so now i am once again waiting for an ajovy PA to be approved lmao

#nervous abt needles but jax offered to help plus ajovy has auto injectors so we are going for it #but i really liked the provider she was good and very easy to talk to and stuff!! and am excited to work w her and try things #also got a referral to their sleep clinic bc my sleep is still Bad and also sleep is a big trigger for me #so im hopeful to see what i can figure out/learn from that #this is the year of blue getting health shit figured out lmak gonna get my tonsils removed etc etc lets Go #she also said i could be a candidate for botox if that seemed interesting but i like how like. open ended she was w things #like she gave me a lot of good info but also everything was my call #she also was good when looking at my mri and explained why she isnt concerned abt ms based on mri and symptoms #and in a way where i actually agree lol like. esp bc i get so anxious i can just latch on to something #but she took the time to answer my questions and explain and show what theyd see if it was ms vs my brain lesions from migraines #and Yeah! i was super stressed and like gad cleared my whole afternoon in case it was a bad time #but it wasnt! im v happy w my new neurologist! #wild to have TWO whole doctors on my care team who i like and trust???? as a fat person??? wow #(trust is w a grain of salt lol i dint entirely trust any doctor But)

[romulanslutempire]

Adelaide Kane needs to reprise her role on SNW (somehow) so we can see her in Romulan tactical gear and with those famous pointy ears.

#* #adelaide kane #sera #star trek #star trek: strange new worlds #also la’an and sera reminded me SO MUCH of the seven and narissa dynamic from st: picard #i need more of it #i pretend not to see that she disintegrated herself and instead choose to believe she beamed herself tf outta there like narissa did #when the borg grabbed her #because no way was girlie quitting after 30 years and flirt-fighting for her life #FR though can we talk about how sera gave la’an an out???? #she had every advantage against her but instead she chose to talk (and villain monologue) with her and offer her the opportunity to live #sera’an could be THAT enemies to rivals to allies in teeth-clenched teamwork #look don’t @ me i love a redemption arc and i think either narissa or sera would be so interesting to see undertaking one bc while they’re #not in that place in their current canon point they could be?? because both of them are just completely brainwashed into serving #the star empire and doing sketchy secret police stuff but they have no idea of a life outside of that #and it’s clear the people they work for don’t give a shit about them beyond the mission or what they can do for their people which #i get is romulan culture and what they’ve been born into BUT #idk idk i just find both of them so fascinating #tal shiar spies will always be loved by me

[spider-man-2o99]

when are you gonna see the new spiderverse?

it's not set in stone or anything, but we're aiming for sometime within the first week of its release if we can afford it!!

(on the note of spoilers: i Strongly Prefer to not be spoiled, but they won't like. Ruin My Life or really even my Day, i just would prefer to not be spoiled cause it's. like. a dick move, y'know? thanks. love yall)

#talking tag #asks #atsv #across the spider-verse #generally movies r a luxury we have to wait a couple months after release 2 see but i have been waiting for This One for Five Years so-- #--it is a very VERY special treat :} #...even if they did For Some Reason decide that THE best color to flash wildly during like. Every Mig Scene is Give Cap Migraines Yellow. #foolish fool fools. if you wanted to reference the end of Issue Number One you need a PALER more DESATURATED yellow or a red/black gradient #in fact pushing the Paler Colors would work a lot better to contrast against him in a properly colored BLACK AND RED SUIT. LIKE THIS DESIGN #sheesh he lives in The Bleeding Neon Future but they pulled Future Inspiration from one of those boring sleek white smooth round shape guys #Nueva York in the comics wasnt meant to be a Cool Future it was meant to be half-criticism of Modern NYC by ppl who Lived There-- #--and the other half was Speculation abt what it Could Be if Nothing About The World In (e616s) 1992 Changed For 107 Years #(...dot dot dot. comma. As Written By Overwhelmingly A Bunch Of Middle Class Cishet White Comic Book Guys[TM]. LMAO) #(the good stuff is GOOD the fun stuff is really REALLY fun and the Bullshit in comic book fashion offers up new writers to KILL On Sight <3 #look man im just. im rambling at this point but like i love marvel 2099 i think there are absolutely Some books that ARE worth reading-- #--from the imprint and dismissing All Of It just for being 90s Comic Books is unfair to the many teams of people who worked on them yknow #i Do Not Like Pat Mills (MANY reasons.) but the initial art team behind Punisher 2099 (especially the penciler) put SO much passion into it #people only really remember Spider-Man 2099 today but e928 has a really rich developed lore that i get the sinking feeling we;ll probably-- #--never actually See Again in any of the same capacity that it once existed at. but. yknow. time passes & things change & that's.. fine.

[psalmsofpsychosis]

one thing about me is, i'll always always always value creativity and experimental ideas and stories and new structure-breaking narratives above established "commonly valued" creations, even if the creative idea's execution is less than ideal, even if the established story is "perfect and spotless". Like, i literally dont care, unconventional and paculiar and unexpected works of art are infinitely more valuable to me whether in subpar execution state or in perfect structure. If you did it differently and did it your way your creation will always be more important to me than any predictable and "proper" narrative made in complete and utter obedience of well reinforced explicit and implicit rules. "this is very well made in all the technicalities look at all these clean details—" catch me give a fuck. It's cliche, repetitive, it's boring, i dont care. We live in a time where obedience of known metrics seemingly ranks higher than any form of outside-the-box creativity and i'm done with it. Say something new, say something personal, say something earnest and paculiar and weird or i'm out of this theater.

#in semi continuous of the same notes; if you look up in the dictionary the definition of madness is me asking for feedback on my writing #from people who are knee deep in traditional structures and have not tried a single new imagery in their entire life #like babygirl they wont love you!!!! by definition they're looking at you from a place of dismay because you're going #against their ingrained value; you're undermining the predictable known forms they love so dearly!!!! #there's no way someone like that can offer any kind of coherent and geniune feedback on your work because –hear me out– #THEY DONT FUCKING VALUE WHAT YOU DO #like their baseline attitude is ''i couldn't care less if what you created didn't exist it's irrelevant to me'' THAT'S NOT A PERSON #WHO'S GONNA HELP YOU HONE YOUR CRAFT THEY DONT GIVE A FUCK ABOUT YOUR CRAFT #''i dont like poetry but–'' ''i dont write in this style but–'' ''i dont read these kinda stuff but–'' the conversation is over. #there's no buts. by the principle of being outside the framework you do not have the level of appreciation expertise and nuance it takes #to offer valuable and applicable feedback and your take may be fun but it's irrelevant ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ #also another form of the barely disguised disdain is ''your creation will only be valuable if it's executed to utter perfection'' and no. #everyday i wake up and see mediocre people #celebrating utterly bland and boring mediocre writing like it's the last day of their fucking lives. #i'll not be held to standards of ''perfect performance'' just because you dont have the balls #to say that you dont enjoy and have no appreciation for creativity and experimental efforts #''it needs to be better'' is just a polite way of saying #''i dont love this but i feel bad about it so i'll trick you and myself into thinking i'll love it if it's done faultless'' #there's no stage in which an effort in creativity will be faultless to you because the fault #to you #IS the creativity and deviation from the norms. #¯\_(ツ)_/¯ #anyway good morning in this house we have absolutely zero value for bland cliche stereotypical generic things 🌸✨️ #on art #on writing

[tyrannuspitch]

for the fic title thing:

only a monster (would bleed like this)

<3

-> send me a made-up fic title and i'll tell you what i'd write for it! (*within ten working days.)

hi hello i have not actually forgotten about this! sorry i left it almost two weeks! i've never done this game before, and title-then-plot is the opposite of my usual creative process, so i found it surprisingly hard. so... unfortunately i still only sort of have an answer. prepare for a lot of maybes and vagueness and vibes.

here's what i originally started writing (which is okay analysis, but sits strictly within canon, and on its own would only produce maybe 400 words of character study, which even by my standards is not quite "a fic"):

okay i had to chew on this one a little because i have so many favourite characters with guilt complexes... but i think this one works best for loki. i feel like the core idea for loki re: this phrase is like... how guilt makes him worse. how seeing himself as a monster is a self-fulfilling prophecy. how he tries to "atone" for violence with even worse violence because his moral compass is just absolutely fucked. this is all especially relevant to thor 1. but also, beyond all this, it's fun to explore how the guilt begins with things he shouldn't feel guilty for at all. like, he feels guilty for having emotions and for being born. he interprets everything about himself through the lens of "weak" or "coward" or "failure" or "monster", even when you could never reasonably expect anything else.

and the vague direction i was going with that was like... loki's fraught relationship with his body. how he does literally hate the blood in his veins.

i know it's incredibly literal, but like... IF you put that man in a situation - say, a curse - that meant he was suddenly, unexpectedly, both badly injured and jotun-looking... i think panic/self-loathing/disgust over looking jotun would win out over his already weak survival instinct, and he would have a visceral, *violent* DO NOT TOUCH ME reaction to anyone trying to help him. which would not be helped by the jotun frost-touch thing, which i maintain is not permanent... but which loki definitely doesn't know how to turn off. (but once he realises *that's* happening he might actually use it to try and drive people (okay, thor) away and prove his ~monsterhood~... and he might miscalculate and do more severe damage than he intended to.)

however... it is bothering me quite a lot, given the prompt, that i can't work out how to fit the guilt-for-not-being-worse thing in here. we have internalised space racism, and we have regular guilt for hurting people you care about, but where is the rancid ideology... where is the deliberate harm to others... where is the *coldness*...

but maybe that's a problem to work out if and only if i actually decided to write the damn thing. maybe it would solve itself if i found some context to put it in. idk. hmm.

ANYWAY. that's as far as i got. started making it, had a breakdown, bon appetit?

#space viking tag #my writing #ask memes #i tried :( #thank you anyway <3 <3 <3 #this also kept pinging the part of my brain that offers existing WIPs every time i try to come up with a new one #with one in which thor interrupts loki during a suicide attempt and loki. tries to kill him. for trying to save him #(but also for regular fratricide reasons) #(thor dying isn't quiiite the primary aim but loki's willing to risk it to drive him away. and he's desperate. and angry. it's complicated) #however that fic also has a lot of other stuff going on bc it's a modern AU and thor pov and stuff #really it's an attempt to transpose the climax of thor 1 into a universe without planet-destroying doomsday devices #and um. it's kind of interesting/funny. that i looked at this prompt and went AH PERFECT. #and then actually really struggled bc i JUST wanted to write thor 1 again. rip #meta #s: fandom #ch: loki #th: monsterhood #th: ethnicity #th: honour + villainy