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splatooshy · 3 months

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@crossedsabers10s

thinking of damon and jeremy’s odd little dynamic.

i imagine it to be what the salvatores would’ve had if katherine hadn’t showed up when damon went home on leave after stefan’s letter about valerie. JNSI excluded.

them having stupid little conversations

“My parents were too busy with Elena.” “So?” Damon says. “Both my parents heavily preferred Stefan, and I still turned out fine.” Jeremy just looks at him.

Jeremy being really messy at the Boarding House and Damon gets annoyed and starts yelling at him to clean up and Jeremy just rolls his eyes and gives him a sassy 'yes mother' and Damon’s just like 'yes I am your mother now clean your fucking room.'

(s5) Damon flopped onto the couch beside Jeremy, looking at the kid with a resigned sort of curiosity. “Ok, spill.” “Huh?” Jeremy startled, flicking a glance towards the open archway leading to the front hall, a move that did not slip Damon’s notice. “Relax. Elena’s gone off to wherever with Blondie. So take a breath and just spit it out. What’s got you acting so weird?” “I’m not acting weird,” Jeremy immediately denied. The vampire scoffed. “Nice try, but somehow, you’re an even worse liar than Stefan.” Jeremy crossed his arms with a huff. “I’m not acting weird, okay? Just drop it!” Damon brought a leg up from where he was sprawled, and jabbed Jeremy in the thigh with his foot. Repeatedly. “You’re sad.” Damon guessed. “Confused… and conflicted, more than slightly intimidated by my awesomeness, and there’s a teensy bit of shame hiding in that guilty little furrowed brow of yours. Oh my god.” He sat up straight, gasping in mock realisation. “Is this a sexuality crisis? Do I need to give you the gay sex talk? Because honestly, that would explain so—“ “What? No! It’s not… That’s- I’m…” Damon raised an eyebrow, clearly indicating for the boy to continue. “I’m not going through a sexuality crisis, or whatever. I’m fine, okay?” Jeremy sighed, silently willing for Damon to leave him alone. Bonnie wasn’t any support, either. All she had done was laugh at him from her spot on Damon’s oh-so sacred reading chair. “Right….” Damon drawled sceptically.

“I don’t know if this is just another one of those ‘coming back from the dead’ things or not, but you definitely weren’t this level of weird the last time Bonica Magica resurrected your punk ass. Are you seeing more ghosts or something? Oh god, is it Kol— is Kol your own personal poltergeist? Damn, that would suck. Tell him to go fuck off to Louisiana, would you? He can go rattle his chains at Marcel or what—“ “I am not being haunted by Kol, Damon.”

(s2) "Remember how I told you I read Elena's diary, because I wanted to find out what her secret was?" Jeremy asks, startling Damon out of his happy lamentation. "Yeah. So?" "Well, I sorta still do it sometimes." Damon widens his eyes in mock horror. "You bad, bad boy," he chides, laughing a little as he takes a swallow of whiskey. “I’ve read all one-hundred-and-seventy-six of Stefan’s. Multiple times. Sometimes I leave comments in the margins. Did you come here to compare notes on invading a sibling’s privacy, or…?”

“…Did you just kiss my forehead?” Jeremy blinked. What the hell. Damon Salvatore, big bad vampire, just kissed Jeremy, on the forehead, showing affection for someone of his own free will —— completely out of nowhere!Damon scowled. “Don’t make it weird.” It wasn’t— It was an accident, okay? Sometimes, the kid reminded him a little too much of himself as a human. Other times, all he saw was Stefan. It would be enough to mess with anyone’s brain. He was acting on instinct!

#damon salvatore #tvd #tvd fanfiction #jeremy gilbert #deremy #jeremy is damon’s son

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choco-bloop · 1 year

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More Hermitcraft / ESMP members as quotes from friends or things I've seen people do: pt 3

*working on a shared document*

Joe: Hold up let me check the word count

Joe: *pastes in his poetry*

Joe: wait what tab am I on-

Cleo: OH MY GOD JOE

Joe: SHIT PLEASE IGNORE THAT

Joey: Ew, barking sounds

Pix: You would bark for Xornorth.

Scott: Not just my brother.

Scott: I have a whole list who he would bark for.

Gem: you know there was this one time where there could only be 3 people in each row. Katherine and Shelby were late but they didn't want to split up so Lizzie asked me to move in by one seat so all four of us were sitting at the back.

Gem: The first thing I thought was 'the amount of gay energy here is really high'

Grian: Therapy is just mental tuition

Xisuma: explain.

Grian: like it's just another authority finding out all my problems and then assigning me homework and to update them on how it went the next week kinda thing

Grian: and then they make it down on papers

-(alternatively Pix and E!False work for the one above too)

*picture of growing plants*

Jevin: my plants actually grew even thought I knocked it over

Cleo: Mine too!

Cleo: except I jammed them all into the pot

Joe: Well only 3 of mine grew

Joe: So you could say that I semi-succeeded in plant murder

Gem: I can smell cheese yum

Sausage: WHAT DOES CHEESE SMELL LIKE-

Gem: IT SMELLS LIKE CHEESE???

Sausage: CHEESE HAS A SMELL??

Gem: DOES CHEESE NOT HAVE A SMELL FOR YOU?

Sausage: ok but like why would I go to sniff one block of cheese lol

Gem: You need to check your sense of smell

Fwhip: and I thought mine was shit-

Joel: Anyway, we are hanging out on [date]

Jimmy, whose bday is that day: YEAH I WONDER WHY.

Fwhip: Guess what's coming back next week!

Shelby: The Hermits? Jimmy's law?

Fwhip: WHAT DO YOU MEAN THE HERMITS?

Shelby: IDK I'M JUST GUESSING

Fwhip: I MEANT THE TOY SHERIFF SHRINE-

Shelby: LMAO

Grian: Putting the fun in Fungi b4 Scar puts the mush in mushrooms

*having a debate about how good mushrooms are*

Pearl: DO YOU LIKE MUSHROOMS?

Xisuma: I've never eaten them

Ren: WHAT

Ren: THAT IS SOMEHOW WORSE

Grian: STOP THE FUNGI-FOBIA

Bdubs: IT'S A REAL PHOBIA AND SO VALID

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asterssunzephyr · 9 months

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TP&TS!Nature Wives angst, maybe? 👀👀👀

THERES SO MUCH I COULD GIVE YOU OH MY GOD?? They are the main couple after all(..One of the only ones, actually. Looking at Desert Duo & ShadowBeans being split up bc one is dead.. then looks at NW & FH.. hm..)

CW: Alcohol, Bars

Implied gay thoughts about your best friend's best friend

Implied Flower Husbands

Implied Bisexual Ren

Implied Gay Thoughts™️ about tp&ts!Gem from tp&ts!Shelby

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"You hurt Jimmy, why are you in my house."

"To talk to you-"

"Talk?! What is there to talk about, Shelby?!"

"A lot! I didnt- I didnt mean to hurt him!"

"Then why did you?!"

"I dont know!"

"Bullshit! Get out of my house. Get out, and dont return."

"But-"

"Out. and give me the key back."

"Sweetheart-"

"Dont. You dont get to call me that anymore, leave."

He stared at her, at the way she still looked so ethereal while pissed at him, but gave the key up with a sigh. They had no right to stay here, not at 2 in the morning when Katherine probably just got back from the heroes base after working with Gem all night.

Okay, she didnt know if that last part was true but from how tense and stressed Katherine looked, Shelby assumed!.. They walked to the door and took one last look at the love of their life, friend, enemy her and left.

That night was spent in the closest bar to Katherines house since she didnt want to go half way across town to the small apartment in Boatem.

"What are you doing this far across town."

They shot their eyes up to the person who slid into the booth across from them. Brown eyes and blonde hair; Jimmy. Why was he in this bar?

"..I wanted to talk to Kat, she didnt wanna hear it. Didnt want to walk all the way back to Boatem at 2 am."

A sip of the liquor in the glass and Shelby finally looked the taller in the eyes.

"I get that," A sip from his own glass, "Scott dragged Gem and I here."

"Gem's here?"

"She is."

Shelby looked for the hint of a lie, but knew better. Jimmy would never lie about Gem's location, not when he cared about her like he does.

"Shelby!"

Another voice, and an arm around her shoulder. Scott, and Gem sliding into the booth on the other side next to Jimmy.

Now, Shelby knew 3 things about themself and their feelings:

1. They're hopelessly in love with Katherine

2. They liked women, and honestly women only

3. Feelings are confusing

One thing he didnt know, however, was to stop staring at Gem who currently looked outright beautiful. Now, she is one to lie quite often, but if shes calling someone beautiful, it's because she means it; well, gods be damned does Shelby mean it.

Apparently, Gem hasn't noticed the staring to they quickly focused on their hands and the drink in it before downing the rest of the glass and calling for another.

See, for a long time, Shelby's known about their feelings for women and how its nothing how Ren felt for women, or men. She's always struggled with feelings, and for a long time coming to terms with being asexual was a lot; dont get the poor guy wrong, hes hopelessly in love with Katherine and knows it, but goddamn does Gem look great.

He focused back in on the conversation when his 2nd, 3rd, fourth drink arrived and took a slow sip out of the glass. Just now, had Shelby realized, Katherine was there and glaring daggers from the end of the table. They made eye contact and Shelby knew she was in trouble, apparently so did Scott with how fast he moved to let Katherine take his place next to the short villain friend.

"How many have you had."

"Uh-"

"She's had four."

"You were keeping track?!"

"I have to drive Scott and Gem home, of course I have. Weve been here for two hours, Shelby."

"Two hours?!"

Shelby winced at Katherine basically yelling next to them. Yep, big trouble.

"Thats it, come on."

"Where are we going?"

"My house, so you can sober up and sleep."

"Im not drunk!"

"Do I look like I care?"

"Well- No, but-"

"No. Cmon."

Shelby stumbled out of the booth as Katherine dragged them and he waved bye to the trio who just waved back; Scott with a "knowing" smirk.

"Are you fucking stupid?!"

"What?"

"Going to a bar, alone, at two in morning?!"

"Like going to boatem wouldve been any better?"

"Not-.. Not what Im saying."

"I just needed to clear my head, Katherine."

"If you wouldve said something-"

"You wouldnt let me! You were so pissed off at me that you wouldnt let me speak!"

"So were both in the wrong!"

"What have I done?!"

"GO TO A BAR, ALONE."

"AND?"

"Gods be damned youre an idiot."

"I tried to talk to you! You wouldnt let me!"

"Then you shouldve told me to shut up!"

"And risk being punched in the face?! Look, Its happened once before and I dont take too kindly to having a busted lip!"

Katherine rolled her eyes and threw a hoodie, a yellow one, at them and stormed off. Shelby simply took this as a sign to go take a shower before Katherine sends her back outside.

------

They both go to sleep angry that morning:). Gem, and Scott, wake up with hangovers btw LMFAO

#zephs aus #empires smp #h&v au #nature wives #esmp s1 #c!gem #c!shelby #c!katherine #c!jimmy #c!scott #just to clarify its all characters #shelbys GAY #for her best friend #and for Kats best friend #nothing ever comes from Gem & Shelby though #Shelby doesnt know what aesthetic feelings & romantic feelings are #He just likes the aesthetic Gem has:)

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cyb-organ · 7 months

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ghosts s5 live reactios except i forgot some of them and also you can tell when it got past midnight

put under cut cuz. spoilers. also wall of text

ep 1: LMAOOO OKAY LITERALLY I PAUSED TO BE LIKE "OMH WHAT THE FUCK ALISON LOST HER GIFT OH NO" AND THEN LITERALLY. THE FRAME THAT I PAUSED ON. THEY POPPED OUT AND SAID APRIL FOOLS. HOOOOOOLY FUCKING SHITBALLS "ALI" ALIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII. MIKE ILY one of these days kitty needs a balloon. give her a balloon. please. "whats up with attenbourough" LMAOOO oh thomas is about to get owned so hard OH MY FUCKING GODDDD "I AM SO AMUSED RIGHT NOW" YEAH MATE humphrey and alisons dynamic is so silly PAT. hes bulletproof mate. HELLO???????????????????? PREGGERS?? PREGENANTE >>>???? HI>???????WHAT????? AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH SOMEONE TELL HUMPHREY LMAO

ep 2: MIKES VIEW OF ROBIN LMAO H MY GOFD;. NIGHTMARE . NI,GHTMARE MIKE OH MY GOD. "so its like sonar :o" captain you and your autism. love ya. KITTY… IS PREGNANT..? WOAH . GRAZY. INSANE woah thomas scottish. what a plottwist everysingle one of pats lines is such a banger "i had to move. for the bank >:(" i lov e you "TRUST ME". "GHOSTS CANT GET PREGNANT, TRUST ME" ROBIN . ROBIN WHAT DFOES THIS MEAN PLEASE WHAT DOES THIS MEAN FOR THE GHOSTS LORE "CHELSEH???! WHO ARE THEY???????????????" pat ily forever <3 realest character kitty and robin lmao… the sillies MIKE.. man… my guy is STRUGGLING NOW THEN THEN NOW NOW THEN NOW. robin based :( "my new family" I LOVE THESE FUCKING GHOSTS. LOVE THEM. home is a feeling! wahg!Hh! found family i love you forever

ep 5: oka i stopped logginh but i think captain backstory is happening so. uhm. ITS HAPPENING……….. ZDRGNJZ DFGKSD ASDF;LDASw#';amA54Mmsa,wa7 HIS NAME IS JAMES. KILLING MYSLERSD#G ZF FDSN AOI "I HAD TO FIND YOU. I…-" "I KNOW" KILL KE NOWOP NE DDEI

JJJ FUCK THIS GAY EARTH ACTUALLY FUCK YOU BEN WILLBONDI KNOW IT WAS YOU no this is insane actually fuck everything THE DANCE BREAK!!!!!!!!!! I LVOE THIS SHOW

okay moving on! ep 6: "hello bumpy im katherine whos your favourite spice girl" loml abba :D its familuy… j its family…………………

#bbc ghosts #bbc ghosts spoilers #godddd i need to make an actual proper post about how mych i love this show but. GOD its over its really over .

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tozettastone · 9 months

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I've been watching Wynonna Earp! The first season was fun, second season... uh, it's going. The jury's still out on whether I think it's as coherent.

Thoughts, with only very mild spoilers for s1:

I feel like, although this show is Americana, it's somehow the direct opposite of Supernatural's Americana. Supernatural has the vibe of like, misty trees, glowing vacancy lights, free-refills-and-cherry-pie, winding roads, classic rock on the radio Americana; Wynonna Earp is like, you know, whiskey at the only saloon in town at noon on tuesday, country town, gunshot gunshot YEEHAW Americana.

They are both definitely Americana though. I don't care that they're both, you know, made in Canada. This is a vibes based assessment.

I like that the main character is a woman who's clearly a massive fuckup, although I could wish she was canonically about ten or fifteen years older. Shows aren't brave enough to give us many forty year old woman fuck ups as main characters yet, and that's a shame. Cowards. But I do like a fuck up and at least she's not a teenager. Thank you, Wynonna.

I think Katherine Barrell is very cute as Nicole Haught! No notes, she's adorable.

I'm also kind of liking seeing the Waverly/Nicole relationship played straight (no pun intended). I am often kind of dubious about token gay shit on screen because, like, yaaaawn, but I'm into s2 now and I think I am satisfied that their relationship does actually have like, a level of care and attention taken in its depiction? Even if everything is shit from here on out, I can be satisfied, like, "yeah, they did try, actually," and that's a nice feeling sometimes.

Lastly, I enjoy Doc Holliday's character but I sincerely hope I never get the desire to write a fic about him because, oh my god, that dialect would kill me. I looked up some fanfic and I am getting the sense that either it changes a lot over the next few seasons, or otherwise that even the US Americans in the audience haven't figured out how to replicate the idiomatic expressions and rhythm. Oof.

#(I did see what they did there when s1 hospitalised Nicole told Nedley her pet cat doesn't like men though. Cheap. Funny. But cheap.)#tozette.txt

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hanorganaas · 11 months

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just so you know how batshit this alt tudors history novel I am planning is:

Katherine of Aragon is like this choosen one figure (she thinks by god) to help fight supernatural entities.

Thomas More also fights the supernatural (he comes from a long line of hunters ala the Winchesters), becomes the love interest (i blame my tudors phase for that one) then goes from this ho ho ho god is great to having a traumatic incident which throws him in his religious trauma era

One of Henry VIII's, the narcissist king, many physic abilities is he could absorb and feel other peoples emotions, yes the Henry who mainly thinks about himself is a empath.

Cromwell is Henry's lover. Gay as fuck. Also quite skilled in combat and will kill you with his pinky especially if you threaten his son, and oh talks to animals which he uses to get secrets of court.

Anne Boleyn it turns out....is actually a witch from a long line of witches and her mother runs a coven that has been there for generations. Shes a gray witch cause her father is a black wizard (and one of the big bads) and her moms a white witch so she inherited both sides. shes sapphic as hell too.

Anne of Cleves who originally comes to court as an ambassador presents herself as the "weird girl" but is actually a brilliant healer.

Meg Roper, More's oldest daughter goes batshit crazy at one point and becomes a vigilante.

Oh and Jane Seymours a fucking werewolf.

#Im insane #novel planning #the tudors #nor speaks #my stupid katherine of aragon fights the supernatural novel #im pretty sure all these historical figures minus anne and cromwell have it out for me.

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lesbiangaybowser · 1 year

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name : indy

age: oh my god i am 24

pronouns: he / they / fae

i am a trans lesbian (transbian) i used to be on tumblr a lot from 2012-2017. Tumblr actually helped me realize i was gay

i’m transmasc jewish white and hiding in my little hole on the internet. i love interacting esp about:

Succession (esp Gerri), Wednesday, The Harley Quinn Show, Harley Quinn+Poison Ivy, lesbianism, gender, milfs, Rachel Weisz, Katherine Hahn, !movies!, eeaao, the environment, how capitalism has destroyed nearly everything, mutual aid, photography, art

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mdnigtmoon · 3 years

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I've just finished watching Newsies and HOLY SHIT it's a fucking MASTERPIECE I love it SO MUCH

#the actors are so good amd talented #the music is just- jkdbdjs #and oh my god am I gay for Katherine #ROMEO PLEASE MARRY ME THANK YOU #the little kid though 🥺🥺 I want him to be my son #MEDDA IS A QUEEN #and crutchie is so precious 🥺#caps tw #tw caps #tw swearing #swearing tw #newsies #newsies broadway #newsies musical #kitty talks

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gardenergulfie · 2 years

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In the scenario that i have created in my head in which Katherine and Shrub go visit Scott to try an convince him to come back, it would be really funny if Katherine could talk to plants and and asks the one lone poppy how Scott has been doing and the poppy just goes “Oh my god you would not believe how sad this man is. Like please get him out of here he keeps rambling to me about his friends and allies and also this fishman named Jimmy. Please help him i am actually concerned.”

I just think it would be funny if Scott talked to the poppy because who else is he going to talk to out there and the poppy’s just like “Oh my god this bitch gay and sad get him some help please”

#mcyt #empires smp #scott smajor #katherine elizabeth #shubble #blame empiressona vc for this

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joviewinchester · 3 years

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Part 2 to the supernatural MBAV crossover ✌️ Also this is on crack so I’m sorry in advance. Lol.

“Oh my gosh, Jack! We’ve been living here for two weeks! Do you know what that means?! We actually live here.” Y/N said excitedly.

“Yeah. I like it here I hope we stay awhile.”

“I have a boyfriend now! Do you know how cool that is?”

“You what?!” Dean exclaimed.

“Don’t eavesdrop! It’s none of your concern.”

“Yes it is. I’m your dad!”

“Moms handle the boys and the periods, and she promised me she’d visit sometime this week, so therefore, it’s none of your concern.”

“Since when have you had contact with Amara?”

“Since like a month ago. Uncle Chuck taught her about the world of cellphones. She promised she’d drop by for at least an hour. You don’t think she’s going to flake on me do you?” Tears welled up in her eyes. Dean held his arms out for a hug.

“Hey, come here, kid. Your mom has done a lot of bad things, but if there’s one thing I know for sure about her, it’s that she never says something unless she means it. Now about the boyfriend thing…”

“His name is Benny, he likes Star Wars, and he’s a calculus nerd. Good enough?”

“Come on Dean. Calculus nerd? You have nothing to worry about.” Sam chimed in.

“Yeah, I guess you’re right, Sammy.”

“Does that mean that me and Jack can go hang out with him and our other friends tonight?” Y/N asked hopefully, putting on the puppy eyes she had inherited from her uncle.

“Fine, but don’t be out any later than 1 am okay?”

“Got it. Would you be mad if we left right now?”

“No. It’s fine. Go ahead, but Jack she is not to be left in a room alone with this punk. Got it? Good.”

Y/N rolled her eyes. “Drama queen.” She muttered.

“I heard that!”

“Good!”

All of their friends had already arrived by the time they got there. The only thing missing was pizza.

“Dude the delivery guy was so slow last time though. Someone should just go get it. I’m starving.” Ethan complained.

“Not it.” Y/N and Erica said at the same time. Benny and Jack both looked at Sarah.

“Um…don’t look at me. I’m babysitting.” She gestured to Jane who was sitting peacefully watching Dusk.

“I’ll go.” Jack volunteered. Y/N tossed him the keys to the Jeep.

“Don’t wreck my baby.” She said sternly, laying on the floor beside Jane.

“Careful. You sound like your dad.” Jack joked. Y/N threw a pillow at him.

“Okay. Okay. I’m going.”

“So this Dusk thing, what is it even about?” Y/N asked. Erica immediately jumped in.

“Oh my god. It is so good. You’ve never seen Dusk? It’s about a human who falls in love with a vampire and vice versa, but there’s also this werewolf that’s in love with the girl, but she ends up choosing the vampire because, duh, she’s in love with him, but anyways it’s so good and you have to watch all of them with me some time.”

“I’ve seen the Vampire Diaries but I’ve never watched this.”

“Oh my God. Don’t you just love the Salvatore brothers?”

“I love Damon, but I’m not huge on Stefan. Oh and Katherine is so hot, but my favorites are Kol and Kai.”

“You have a thing for murderers with sociopath tendencies and you’re dating Benny?” Erica asked.

“Okay, just leave me alone. Kai is hot and he had reason to murder his entire family.” Literally the entire room was just looking back and forth between them in confusion.

“Remind me to never leave you two alone.” Sarah said.

“Did you just say murdered his entire family casually in a sentence?” Benny asked.

“Yes. If you guys watched the show you would totally get it. Although Jack doesn’t and I made him watch it but then again his biological dad is literally satan-“

“Wait. Wait. Wait. First of all, Castiel isn’t his biological dad? Second of all what is his biological father a serial killer or something?” Ethan asked.

That was when Y/N registered what she had said. “It’s not my place to tell you guys about his biological dad, so like please don’t tell him I told you anything.”

Everyone agreed and dropped it. Soon after Jack came back with the pizza. “Who’s hungry?”

“I am.” Erica whispered passive aggressively under her breath. Sarah elbowed her and gave her a look, mouthing the words shut up.

Benny, Ethan, Jack, and Jane all grabbed a slice.

“Want one?” Benny asked.

“No I’m fine. Thanks though.” Y/N said. Her mood had noticeably dropped, and it was because she was thinking of her mother. What if she didn’t come like she’d promised? Well, at least her cousin Gabriel promised a visit soon, despite her father’s protest.

“Hey what’s wrong?” Sarah asked her.

“It’s stupid. My mom told me that she was going to visit me sometime this week, but I’m worried she won’t show up.” At that very moment Amara appeared in the room. Now there was a lot of explaining to be done.

“Holy shit! Who are you and how did you do that?!” Ethan exclaimed.

“Wow. Gorgeous alert.” Erica said, ignoring the fact that a woman she didn’t know had just appeared out of nowhere. Y/N immediately jumped up and hugged her.

“I missed you, mom.” She muttered into her hair.

“Mom?!” They all asked at once.

“Woah. Woah. Woah. So what are you then?” Benny asked.

“Why are you guys not very freaked out about this?” Jack asked.

“We know about the supernatural, but nothing like this.” Ethan said still in shock.

“So, you made friends? I’m proud of you. How’s your dad doing?” Amara said.

“Same old. Same old. Sad, confused, protective.”

“Wait how do you guys know about the supernatural?” Jack asked ignoring the side conversation.

“That depends. How do you feel about vampires, warlocks, and seers?” Benny asked.

“Wait! You’re vampires?!” Y/N exclaimed suddenly.

“Not all of us. Just Erica and Sarah.” Ethan said.

“You guys haven’t even the ones killing people have you, because that would suck because then I’d have to kill you.”

“No, but really?! Kill us?!” Sarah exclaimed.

“My family hunts the supernatural! You guys have got to stay on the downlow or my dad and my uncle will straight up kill you and not think twice, please be careful!”

“Are warlocks on that list?” Benny asked.

“Wait, you’re a waflock and you didn’t tell me?!”

“We still don’t know what you two are and I think I speak for everyone when I say I would like to know!”

Y/N sighed. This would be a long conversation. She took in a deep breath. “So, my dad is the vessel of the archangel Michael aka the person Michael needed to possess to win the apocalypse which already happened by the way. My dad kind of saved the world. My Uncle Sam on the other hand is the vessel of Lucifer who is Jack’s biological dad which makes Jack a nephilim, and by the way Lucifer is actually pretty chill. But that’s beside the point. This is Amara my mom aka the darkness aka god’s sister which kind of makes me a Demigod which makes god aka Chuck my uncle and Lucifer, Michael and Gabriel my cousins which makes Jack my second cousin and also by the way Castiel is an angel too. Oh and also my dad is kind of gay for Cas but neither of them will admit but you know, subtext.”

They all looked at her with wide eyes. “If you plan on sticking with me welcome to my dysfunctional family.” She announced.

“Are they okay?” Amara whispered.

“Maybe. I don’t know.” Y/N whispered back.

“Ya know what? Cool. Also can we just talk about how Y/N has hot parents? MILF alert. Like it finally makes sense why she is so pretty.” Erica said casually.

“What’s a MILF?” Amara asked her. Y/N face palmed.

“It’s good. It’s a compliment, but don’t say it to anyone , ever.” Y/N tried to explain.

“Anyways…I guess I’m gonna go and let you all process this interaction. Benny, call me. Bye!” They all left, and Y/N insisted that they take the Jeep and not just teleport.

When they got back to the house everyone kind of just looked at each other awkwardly. “Mom and I are gonna go…what do normal teenage girls do with their non supernatural mothers? Paint their nails? We’ll go do that. See you soon.”

Dean looked at Jack waiting for an explanation. “I’ve got…homework. Yeah. Anyways bye.”

“What just happened?” Sam asked.

Dean shrugged. “Don’t know. Don’t care.”

#mbav imagine #supernatural imagine #my babysitters a vampire imagine #my babysitter’s a vampire #ethan morgan #sarah fox #erica jones #benny weir x reader #benny weir #amara supernatural #dean winchester x daughter!reader #dean winchester #sam winchester #castiel novak #jack kline #chuck shurley #gabriel spn #lucifer spn #michael spn

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racebox-of-higgars · 3 years

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Newsies As Things My Friends Have Said - Part Eight

Albert: ᶦ ʷᶦˡˡ ᵏᶦᶜᵏ ʸᵒᵘʳ ᵃˢˢ ˢᵒ ʰᵃʳᵈ ʸᵒᵘʳ ᵛᵉʳᵗᵉᵇʳᵃᵉ ᵖᵒᵖ ᵒᵘᵗ ᵒᶠ ʸᵒᵘʳ ᵐᵒᵘᵗʰ ˡᶦᵏᵉ ᵃ ᵖᵉᶻ ᵈᶦˢᵖᵉⁿˢᵉʳ

Jack: I just wanna put my brain in a jar. I'll proudly show it off to people like "look at my jar of electric meats!"

Crutchie: I wish I could not give a fuck

Crutchie: i give So Much Of A Fuck All The Time

Spot: godDAMMIT we can't iron fries

Race: I DIDNT MNWO THAT WAS QHERE EYE

Spot: mnwo

Jack: qhere

Race: wow homophobic

Race: AND ON THE LAST FAY OF PRIDE LONTH TOO

Spot: fay

Jack: lonth

Les: hama me chees

Davey: literally what the fuck does this mean

Race: y'all ever just. gay disgust

Davey: alas,, suffer

Jack: anyway i'm stupid, moving on

Race: I W A N Y

Race: WABT

Race: FUCK

Spot: wany

Jack: wabt

Race: himjphobic

Spot: hiMjPhoBIc

Crutchie: THEYRE SO IN LOV

Crutchie: AND IM S ONF T ABOUTBIT

Race: y'all every just be begging your brain to let you sleep like. in tears. pl,, plea se,,,, when sleep???? and your brain is just like. *sound of a potato rotating*

Jack: Capitalism is the bane of my existence

Davey: I AM BUT A STUPID LITTLE BOY WITH A STUPID LITTLE BRAIN

Race: ah yes, the good ol' scream n stral

Albert: This is a technique I like to call the good ol' Spin n Yeet

Race: swiggity swag taco bell in a bag

Katherine: There's os much representation in this pirate crew of milfs i'm crying

Elmer, sobbing: my soup exploded in the microwave

Race: I'm in spain without the w

Race: Wait

Crutchie: I just don't have,, legs

Jack: n O

Albert: I swear to god I will crush your nuts

Race: Jokes on you god nerfed me and I have no nuts to smash

Jack, having just been kicked in the balls: I wouldn't consider that a bad thing

Race: Homophobic

A Straight: How is that homophobic??

Race: You are inconveniencing me, A Gay

Katherine: Too much is happening there is Several Brain

Davey: Please don't rub my bones

Race: Jesus, he's cool, Jesus is my bitch

Jack, longingly: What is family?

Race: I got to show off my mad feet skills

Davey: Do I want to ask?

Race: No

Elmer: Time to get my blood good and frothy!

Race: The pussy wagon has left

Race: That felt wrong I formally apologise

Race, during a thunderstorm: Clapping them cloud bussies

Davey: Your speaking rights have been revoked

Race: You can't beat a Robin Hood furry costume!

Race: My list of disorders is longer than your dick!

Davey: I don't know whether I should be concerned for you or impressed by how good that insult was

Race: Both

Race: Who says fist fights and running from the cops can't be romantic? Spot: That's true love right there, war crimes

Race: Correct

Race: So,,, wanna go commit war crimes with me?

Race: Bussy full of beans???

Race: He put,,, he put beans in his bussy????

Elmer: What's a bussy?

Jack: I'm a fruit, put me in some granola

Albert: TELL ME WHAT'S IN YOU YOU OATY FUCK

Jack: You can't have abs and support Trump, that's just homophobic

Katherine: Y'all ever just,,, cavetown but make it lesbian??

Jack: It's pride month I'm legally required to love myself for this month only

Katherine: Man, sometimes I get sad and just milf

Sarah: how talk to girl girl pretty

Albert: Just do better??? learn to lesbian???

Katherine: I got my milf chocolates!

Jack: How are your milf chocolates?

Katherine: creamy

Spot: Oh, it's a strap

Albert: Famous last words

Jack: self reflection is OUT, being your friends personal fun house mirror is IN

uh yeah i'm sorry

@angelslibrary

#newsies #newsies shitpost #newsies incorrect quotes #newsies as things my friends have said #things my friends have said #incorrect quotes #racetrack higgins #jack kelly #spot conlon #davey jacobs #crutchie morris #elmer kasprzak #albert dasilva #cursing tw #caps tw #possibly nsfw??#i don't know #lemme know if i need to tag anything #my friends are just Like This

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dream-girls-evil · 3 years

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Stuff from the Live: Madam Spellman Edition

Oh my god this entire live was so adorable and chaotic and everything I could have wished for. Especially because they answered so many of my questions!! The universe really said Kristen Gets Gay Rights on this day. Anyway!!!

CAOS Stuff

MIRANDA GOT HER ZELDA COSTUMES!!! Notably the gold nightgown (let’s not think too hard about that, lest we combust), her leopard print blouses, her black Directrix suit, and the orange velvet blazer!

They both agreed their plot line was ridiculous and they were robbed and it was outrageous that Zelda and Lilith didn’t get together because they’re yin and yang and just FIT 😭

Michelle wanted to be Scottish on CAOS and they made her be American and that is homophobia

There would have been a part 5 storyline about Hecate being dangerous/vengeful

Michelle had some cut scenes with Richard in part 1

Michelle’s favorite dynamic on the show was Zelda and Hilda’s sibling relationship

If Madam Spellman happened, Zelda would make the first move, because she’s very forward and gets what she wants, and if she said she wanted to have Lilith, Lilith would be had (yes this is the real phrasing they used and yes I am dying, especially because it was my question)

I also asked if there was ever a canon reason for why Zelda didn’t have children, and it seems like there wasn’t, but Miranda said she thought Zelda might have planned on having them in the future and just hadn’t yet, while Michelle said she thought Zelda just didn’t like men, which is valid—doesn’t seem like there are tons of eligible bachelors in the witch world who could keep up with a woman like Zelda

Michelle thinks Zelda and Missy would have a grand time together in a crossover

Other Stuff

Michelle’s in Atlanta working on a new project that will involve looking very different from anything she’s done before 👀

Miranda’s soon to be starting a new project in Australia that sounds like it will have very serious and somber vibes, no time for poncing around

Michelle’s celebrity crush is Bill Murray and Miranda doesn’t get it 😂😂😂

Michelle’s idol is Joan Rivers—Katherine Hepburn if she’s trying to sound impressive—and Miranda’s is RBG

Michelle is obsessed with backgammon

Miranda is fostering a dog! 😃

Michelle considers her biggest accomplishment to be coining the phrase “pando moment”

They both would love to do theater again

A Challenge to Fans

I have no idea how serious they were about this but knowing them, they are, because they love Madam Spellman and if this is the only way they can get it to happen, then they’re gonna make it happen! But they literally said to write them short, like 3-minute scripts and they’d act the best one out. YEET!!!!

#caos #zelda spellman #caos lilith #madam spellman #zelith #miranda otto #michelle gomez #ottogram #gogogram #missy doctor who

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lactosefreevanillayoghurt · 3 years

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tigers as my whatsapp messages because i think they're Cool 5.0 (1.0, 2.0, 3.0, 4.0)

kate: guys i have something i need to get off my chest

kate: i-

kate: i'm-

cairo: you're gay

reese: gay.

kate: oH my gOD guys can't you just let me have my momENT?!

cairo: our friendship group is three cheerios in a trench-coat, trying to convince people they're a frootloop

riley: get stabbed 🥺🥺🥺🥺✌️✌️✌️💓💓💓🤗🤗🤗❤️👉👈👉👈👉👈👉👈😽😽😽😽

reese: flies puke on your food

mattie: that's so mankilicious

mattie: i would never do that

reese: you're not a fly though

mattie: very true i have subsequently noticed that i am not a fly

kate: why are you so tall

chess: grow bag

chess: good fucking soil

eva: i regret to inform you that i am listening to olivia rodrigo again and honestly ma'am are you sure you haven't tried kissing a woman

annleigh: *aggressively feeds you soup*

annleigh: don't fucking die

clark: *aggressively consumes soup*

clark: i won't die i promise

farrah: *dies anyway*

annleigh: erm no

clark: that was not the plan

kate: your lactose has a zero tolerance policy of katherine dalton in any form

#back again!!!#feat: chess telling her grow bag origin story eva regretfully questioning olivia rodrigos straightness and annleigh saying the fuck word #its chaotic and beautiful #i make these and im like haha funny and then im like what the fuck is conversation actually #like #in what context did some of these happen yet somehow they did #miraculous #we are the tigers #kate dalton #chess watt #mattie wheeler

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asterssunzephyr · 9 months

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Katherine: Oh shekby thank gods your here- Toon won't listen to me can you get her to stop batting Joey around?

Shelby:.......I mean I WAS gonna HELP her bat Joey around....and still am so....nooo?

Katherine: wot

Shelby:....anyways- took let me get in a few good bats! *pulls out giant bat she made specifically for this occasion*

And I feel like Joey's dragon woukd just be chilling qnd watching from the side like "why does my rider have to be such a dumbass??"

{rq dont wanna be rude by Kat's dragon's name starts with an L not a T<3 /nm}

Triton.. bro has no brain cells just like Joey but WORSE. only thing Tri knows is that Shelby & Kat are gay for each other.

#zephs aus #empires smp #nature wives #zeph & millys aus #httyd au #a lot of the dragons are greek god related #Milly & I are insane LOL #Joey is oblivious to the gays #braincells? none #all of them? gone #empires crew #esmp s2 #empires s2 #empiresshipping

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turkisherlockian · 3 years

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Books and Sins | Chapter Two [Benedict Cumberbatch AU]

Hello everyone! I'm Cer but you might remember me as @rosamundhr a.k.a. Rosamund, it was my nickname but I've changed my mind and I will use my own name Ceren, now. (Cer for short hehehe) Unfortunately I lost access to @rosamundhr so I will keep posting my stories here! I hope you enjoy it and I apologise for making you all wait for so long! Love you all, stay safe. 😸❤️

Summary: Katherine is a fan of Timothy Carlton, the writer who she knows nothing about. No photos, no interviews, no information, not even his age. And one day, a man comes into her life who claims to be her classmate from high school. But through the time, she has a gut feeling something is... Wrong.

Warnings: Mature content, self harm, violence, swearing.

Word count: 1855

Feedbacks are much appreciated and so motivating!

Chapter One

---

Katherine woke up with a weird feeling inside her chest. She was mad at herself for being like this: She could like someone so easily and fall in love with them soon after. It was not her fault though, he was really charming. Too good looking to like her back. However, she tried to convince herself that she just liked him and was attracted to him because he was a writer and well... Handsome as fuck. Not to mention his gentlemanly behaviour. Taking a deep breath, she reached out for her phone to tell her best friend about it. She didn't really have lots of friends and she never complained about it, she liked solitude.

She scolded herself for being that excited about the thought of seeing him again. He was the very first thing that was on her mind in the morning and she wanted to talk to him again. So badly.

K: Morning!

S: Morning to you too 🤣

You're texting me 'morning' since when?

K: Stop being sarcastic. Can't I be nice to my best friend?

S: Of course you can, I'm kidding. I just wondered what made you this cheerful... Or who, I should say.

K: You know who.

S: Oh do I?

K: Come on, Samantha! The man I met yesterday. I can't get him out of my mind, I don't know what happened to me but he's like... Cigarette.

S: You're smoking? Since when???

K: Of course I don't! It was just an example, idiot. Just can't get him out of my mind. What do I do?

S: Text him maybe?

You won't seem desperate, don't worry. I am sure he found you attractive as well and he might even be in love with you.

K: Okay, no need to exaggerate.

What do I say, good morning or hi?

S: It doesn't matter!

K: Okay, I'll text you later.

Are you sure I won't seem desperate?

S: JUST TEXT HIM FOR GOD'S SAKE!

K: OKAY I WILL!

S: Don't forget to tell me about it. I gotta go now, talk to you later. xxx

K: Bye! ❤️

---

There was something different about him. Did she like him because he was attractive or because he was nice to her? She had to admit that he was attractive, but there was something else in his voice, in his looks, in the way he talked. She actually found him beautiful.

Taking a deep breath, she finally decided to text him.

K: Good morning. :)

Was he still asleep? Maybe he was at work. Wait, do writers go to work? Maybe he had another job. Maybe not. Maybe he just did not want to talk to her... Why wasn't he replying?!

She sighed in frustration as she took a big sip from her coffee and burned her tongue.

B: Morning, Katherine.

How are you? :)

He finally replied after 10 minutes. She bit her lip as her heart skipped a beat, and started typing.

K: I'm good! Getting ready to go to school.

K: I mean work.

God, I'm an idiot, she thought.

K: How about you?

B: Just got out of shower, that's why I replied late by the way. Sorry about that. :)

K: I was wondering if you would like to meet again sometime.

She grinned as she bit her lip, that's what she always did when she was nervous or excited.

---

K: I would love that! When will you be free?

B:I'm always available for you.

Whenever you'd like. :)

She started squealing in excitement. What did he just say?!

K:I'm free in the afternoon.

B: Wonderful. How about the café we met?

K: Sounds good. Is 2PM okay for you?

B: Yes. I am looking forward to it, Katherine.

K: So am I. :)

I gotta go now, see you later. x

B: Have a good day. See you. x

She looked at her watch and she was 30 minutes late already. Without telling Samantha about it, she started to get ready in a hurry.

She was never late for work, so no one was upset with her being late.

---

''...And my mum said I'm out of my mind!''

Katherine just could not get him out of her mind, and she hated it. She did listen to her counselee but couldn't pay any attention, and now she was crying. She gave her a tissue, ''I understand you, Jane, and I hope telling me about it made you feel better. I know how difficult it is for you, but I have a suggestion. When I was your age, I found a way to deal with my problems: being your own counselor.'' She smiled warmly.

''My own counselor? How?'' The young girl sniffled.

''I imagined that I was told about everything I am going through, and I had to find them a way out. Think of it as if you're reading your life in third person of view. I did it for years and I still do when I don't want to tell people about my feelings. Plus, I found out that it was scientifically proven in college, so it is safe and it actually works. How does that sound?''

She wiped her tears, ''I can try...''

''So tell me, what would you say to yourself if you were someone else?''

''I think I would say that maybe..." She sniffled, "Maybe her mother wasn't feeling good as well.''

Katherine smiled, ''That's it! You are right. We all have problems that we don't want to tell the others and sometimes we might burn out on people we care about the most without being aware of it. You can ask your mother if she is feeling alright, it doesn't matter whether you are still upset with her or not; maybe you can help her as well just like you just helped yourself. That was very brave of you, in my opinion.'' She smiled wholeheartedly.

The girl who was just crying smiled and said ''Thank you very much, Miss Daelan. It's going to be the first thing I'm gonna do when I'm home.''

''You're welcome. Feel free to talk to me anytime.'' She got up to open the door for her and then left the room as well before checking her phone.

3 new messages from Samantha

S: Hey! Send screenshots!!!

Are you there?

Kath!

K: I'm sorryyyy I was late to work already and then forgot to text you.

Here you go:

*screenshots*

S: I told you that he liked you as well, he is flirting with you!

K: No he's not!

S: He adores you!

K: You are really exaggerating.

''Miss Daelan, do you have a minute?'' Katherine looked up at the principle, "Yes, Mr Brealey."

K: The principle wants to talk to me, I'll ttyl xxx

S: What did he say?

The old man opened his room's door for Katherine, she smiled and walked inside. He gestured her to sit down, "Please, have a seat." he said and closed the door. After sitting down, he cleared his throat and said "Miss Daelan, I... Erm..."

He loosened his tie, couldn't dare to look at Katherine. His cheeks were red and there was a thin layer of sweat on his forehead. The young woman frowned a little, listening to him in curiosity. "I've known you since the day you started working here and... I must say that you are the most intelligent, kind, beautiful woman I have ever seen... I can't take my eyes off you because you're an amazing woman and I... I love you."

Katherine was shocked, didn't know what to say at first. She did not feel honored at all, she was disgusted. "Excuse me? I thought you were married!"

"Yes but I don't love my wife, I'm going to divorce her soon; you must understand Miss Daelan, I love you! Please give me a chance..." And now she felt her blood boil in her veins.

"I am sorry but it's never gonna happen. I suggest you to divorce your wife as soon as possible to keep her away from an asshole like you." Katherine stood up angrily and walked towards the door, "But Miss D--" and she shut the door.

K: FUCKING HELL!

He said he loves me!

He's fucking married, Samantha!

*seen*

Are you there?

*seen*

K: I guess you are busy

I'm going home to get ready, talk to you later xxx

S: Sorry, I had to deal with a costumer

What a prick!!!

How dare he?

I want to kill him.

K: Violence is never the answer but yeah, I pity on his wife to be honest. He even has children.

ANYWAY

WHAT AM I GOING TO WEAR?

S: Whatever you're comfortable with. :)

K: How about a dress?

The one I wore when we last met?

S: You look so hot in it 🔥

Wear that one!

K: It covers all of my body, it's kinda tight and there's NO WAY I can look hot in it. I don't want to look pretentious anyway.

S: Anything you wear looks good on you, love!

K: Gay. 🤭

S: Shut up. Wear it!

K: LOL sorry!

I gotta go nowww

S: Tell me all about it when you're home, IF you go back home ;) Good luck!

K: I WILL and thanks! ❤️

The young woman sighed as she tried to find her keys. She was still mad at the principal and it was frustrating her.

After a short shower, she dried her hair with a towel and let her curls down on her shoulders. She wore the dress and looked in the mirror, It actually looks good, she thought. After applying some makeup and wearing her favourite her perfume, she was ready. She didn't like to wait and hated making the others wait for her as well, so she left her flat at 1:30PM. It took her 15 minutes to get to the café and she realized that she wasn't the only one who was punctual.

"Hi..." She said as she walked towards the man she couldn't get out of her mind. He was wearing a brown jumper with beige trousers and she breathed his masculine, minty cologne in. Her heart was beating faster already.

"Oh, hi, Katherine!" He stood up and for one second she didn't know what to do. Should she shake his hand or kiss his cheek? Or hug him? The young man leaned down and kissed her cheek before hugging her, she was shaking inside.

He felt her body close to his. He felt her delicate, pale skin; and her linden scent made him feel dizzy. Her arms hugged his chest and he felt her plump, beautiful breasts. He watched her dress tighten around her curves as she moved.

She was so beautiful and he could barely keep his hands to himself. He could kiss and take her right there, but didn't. He had to control himself until she submitted to him, which wasn't going to take long because it was in her blood. Submitting, obeying, and being his. He just knew it, and he was going to take what belonged to him. Katherine, belonged to him.

---

Chapter Three

Please let me know what you think! ❤️

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omgkalyppso · 3 years

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Quote Prompts

You think you are possessing me - but I've got my teeth in you. Angela Carter from Unicorn

Flowers teach futility and amazement. You know me, I am always willing to learn. Katherine Mansfield from a letter to J.M. Murry.

Take this bowl of blackberries from the garden. The sun has made them warm. I picked them for you. I promise I will try to stay on my side of the couch. Ross Gay from Catalog of Unabashed Gratitude

Don't you imagine you will be in love again and perhaps happily? Irish Murdoch from a letter to Michael Oakeshott

In the dark our hands pretend to pray but really make love. Natalie Diaz from When My Brother Was an Aztec

Who hasn't ever wondered: am I a monster or is this what it means to be a person? Clarice Lispector from The Hour of the Star

I'm not used to being loved. I wouldn't know what to do. F. Scott Fitzgerald from More Than Just a House

I'm waiting for your teeth at my throat. It's only good manners. Stephanie Valente from I'm Sorry, Is That Too Submissive For You?

What do you do with tenderness when all you expect is fury? Hieu Minh Nguyen from Not Here

He confesses how long he's looked for a place to worship and, oh, you put him on his knees. Ash Vernon from Profane

If we meet each other in hell, it's not hell. Geoffrey Hill from Broken Hierarchies

Every time I planted my roots I had to rip them out. Mariana V from Too Much Of Me Is Scattered On This Earth

It was always you: your unutterable name, this growl in my throat. Erika Meitner from Staking a Claim

The reason I kiss the thing that haunts me is so I can stop running from it. Rebeka Anne from Back Again

I have been thinking of how I want to be touched by you, with hands that will play me like piano keys, with fingers that will make a symphony out of me. Karese Burrows

You do not know how little I loved before I loved you. Joan Naviyuk Kane from Love Poem

They cannot stop looking into each other's eyes. They have discovered something. They have discovered how much each cares about the other. James Baldwin from Just Above My Head

Will you send across the stars a sign? Anna Akhmatova from In A Dream

Tell me every terrible thing you did and let me love you despite it. Edgar Allen Poe

Yes, I do like you. I am afraid to write the stronger word. Virginia Woolf

God, god, god, I need love, I need it, I need it. Anais Nin from Mirages

How tightly do we need to be pressed against each other before you admit that you aren't doing this for warmth? Tara Love from This. This Is Too Far

He kisses—how do I explain it? Like someone in love. Like he has nothing to lose. Like someone who has just learned a foreign language and can use only the present tense and only the second person. Andrew Sean Greer from Less

Love him and let him love you. Do you think anything else under heaven really matters? James Baldwin from Giovanni's Room

You kiss the back of my legs and I want to cry. Only the sun has come this close. Only the sun. Shauna Barbosa

#from various things i have saved in a tag called 'quotes' on my blog #writing prompts #long post #i made this

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