The Handmaid’s Tale 5x03 “The Border”👀
Thoughts (and some over-thoughts) 🤔🤓 TLDR: Look, this episode really wanted to fuck me up, like really make me cry, not sure what I ever did to it. Still some laughs, though. Definitely my favorite of the season so far.
Luke… can someone please tell me why they are making him so obtuse if they want us to like him?😂 I get that “Gilead is a block box” on a some fronts but Luke has known enough people who have literally first-hand lived in Gilead (not to mention Rachel and Tuello who seem pretty available to him certainly know a bit about how society and the classes function if not the politics) that I’m getting a little tired of the “well he was never there” excuse for his continued ignorance of certain things, like how refugees deal with their own trauma differently, or that Gilead has a very strict dress color-coded dress code and ALL of it has meaning. You mean to tell me he has been gathering all that info and all those photos of little girls in pink dresses and bonnets for years in his search for Hannah and it doesn’t stand out that this is a very different (and much more grown up) outfit? I will ONLY give him a pass on this if it turns out he’s color blind.
I already love Lily, please don’t kill her off. "women always say that when they've done something extraordinary"👏 I love her. I also enjoyed the callback to “I thought you’d be taller”😂 (even though as a 5’3” person who’s always being underestimated I can relate to June🙄😂). I did find it interesting that the last person who delivered that line was “Daisy”, also resistance. And we find out later in s2 that Ofglenn who suicide bombed the new red center opening was also named “Lily”. All fighters, all flowers🌼. And now we also have a “Rose”? Coincidence?? (is anything in THT ever a coincidence?)👀
I feel like Moira was seeing June through Lily’s eyes here was so needed. They’ve been so disconnected lately, with Moira just seeming scared of, baffled and frustrated with June, and I think she needed that reminder of badass rebel June, not just the struggling June who killed Fred, but the leader June who made angels flight happen; her friend the fierce loyal fighter with a huge heart, who inspired her to fight and get out when she wanted to give up. She needed to be reminded of the good she’s done and hope she’s inspired in others (I’m not sure she even knew about the exchange for Fred June orchestrated??). And by the end it seems like they’re back on the same team (at least for now?).
Serena is insufferable. The “respect Fred deserves" 😂😂 SHE IS FLUSTERED WHEN TUELLO WALKS OUT.
Can’t help but love when Lily refers to Nick as “your guy”😏😁
Likewise to her attitude toward June, I noted a similar shift in Moira’s attitude about the women’s camp. Very much see parallels here. She first refers to them as “suicidal”, infers that they’re dangerous and damaged (and she didn’t tell June because she was afraid June would join if she knew about them). They, like June, do not fall into the “healthy” “healing and moving on” mindset she’s subscribed to and think is best. But I think we see her realize maybe she was wrong, and gain and admiration and respect for them and what they’re doing (even if that way is not for her)...especially when we hear that MAGIC WORD...
MAYDAY. May. fucking. Day. Y’all, when I say I cried... I’m starting to well up just thinking about it."We thought it was made up. We thought it wasn’t real. We thought we made it up because we had to.” “Then you were Mayday too” 😭😭 ...what a cathartic moment... WHAT a pay off.
Also loved when Lily, talking of the people they’ve lost, said “but everyone who works with Mayday knows the stakes”. Can the people who insist June is responsible for the death of literally anyone who dies while anywhere near her proximity please take note? Yes there are some choices she’s made that have specifically yielded bad consequences that she is more culpable for but everyone who chose to plan and fight alongside her (especially rn thinking Beth, Sienna, Alma, Brianna) knew the stakes and made their own decisions, and to say otherwise is to do THEM a disservice, in undermining their agency and their bravery. Enough with the “her fault” Aunt Lydia bullshit.
Lawrence laughing in Tuello’s face, he basically hung a metaphorical “no solicitors” sign on the door and said goodday, sir.
Serena doesn’t like MacKenszie’s suspicions about Fred’s death, she’s worried it might undermine her blackmail ambitions! Oh no!
Aunt Lydia is unhinged and needs therapy and anger management, not prayer. And yes, this is obviously foreshadowing / the seed of Lydia’s journey that will eventually get her to where she is in the Testaments. Got to say, this episode was really keen on foreshadowing.
Back to the Most Awkward Gilead Dinner Party From Hell ever (at least that would be my idea of hell without Lawrence’s one liners to almost save it. And I guess that Nick’s there). Speaking of, Nick (and Rose??maybe?? Might have actually been sincere on her part) performing the “Gilead happy couple show” or whatever that was, was... disorienting? This is the first time we’ve seen him play the “happily-married” “happy to be here, sir!” commander role and yeah it was a little unnerving because it’s so obviously not Nick happy, it’s Nick play acting at happy? Which I guess maybe we would buy except that we know Nick. And while it does seem that he and Rose have a caring partnership with a good deal of trust, and I do hope they are able to share some genuine moments of peace and levity in the safety of their home, we’ve seen him alone with her and by himself and that is not a happy man (and though I very much want happiness for him that will never happen in Gilead). His happy good young loyal commander mask started to slip real quick though when Commander MacAsshole started shit-talking June (calling her a devil! He LITERALLY demonizes her! 😈🤣 the drama! honestly these Gilead folks are too much) and throwing around thinly veiled metaphorical threats (or was that a simile?). Anyhow, excuse me, Mr. Blaine, PLEASE CONTROL YOUR FACE, SIR.😅 I will be VERY interested to see how much loyalty Mrs. Blaine actually has towards her dad’s (WHO IS HE?) very good friend (I mean THAT can’t be a coincidence). And will she also ultimately be forced to choose between Nick and her Dad?? Not really sure of her deal yet definitely makes me nervous, but we do know Rose also has shown a good deal of empathy for June and she seems genuinely kind hearted... (also she DOES kind of look like a grown up Eden and it kind of throws me 😳)
Of COURSE the young sympathetic guardian helping at the border has to go back to Gilead to HIS WIFE AND CHILD he can’t leave behind. Jesus, why not just name the character “NICodemus”? You could cut this foreshadowing with a knife
I would like to state for the record that I owe Mr. Mark Tuello an apology (FOR NOW, I’ve still got my eye on you, Mark) for assuming HE was the one to pull Nick into an indiscreet rendezvous in a very open gazebo with commanders nearby. Shoulda known, textbook Nick, only ever (and almost always) reckless when it comes to June. Oh, my poor love-sick boy.🥺 Although I might be careful, Mac, the last commander who insisted on calling Nick SON didn’t end up too well.
Started crying again when Naomi appeared in that doorway with baby Charlotte (even if she insists Lydia forced her, I don’t fully buy it). I think this season has made me wish for a redemption arc for Naomi? After Warren gets dealt with I kind of just want her and Janine to escape to Canada and be bff’s and eat macarons and raise Angela Charlotte together, is that wrong? (fan fic idea??👀) Yeah no I guess that would be wrong.
Not sure I can really go into the phone call without aggressively weeping… there are some things I loved and some I did not, and I may be still processing, so... I will just say that if anyone who makes fan vids really wanted to rip a shipper’s heart out in a very painful but kinda good way, the song “Someone You Loved” (duet version) would be a really good one to use for an edit centered around the call and reflecting back on their relationship so far from both their perspectives (and why they need each other)👀. I purposely say SO FAR because I refuse to accept anything is over, nothing is ever over with these two no matter how many times they say goodbye (and they didn’t even technically SAY goodbye hear, so hah).
Ok I will say one more thing about it: the Nick fantasizing/day dreaming about them kissing thing was interesting, wasn’t it? For one that they didn’t just use a flashback of a previous kiss (which would have been much easier), and also as I’ve seen mentioned, that this is the first time we’ve seen into a character’s head besides June(??) WTF is going on here? Am I just overthinking it?🤔
I think by now we have scientifically proven that Janine cannot be killed and ok I am here for it (but knocking on wood just in case).
I believe Serena is standing back in the exact spot where she read (the cost of which her pinky), receiving yet another undesirable sentence…she’ll roll with it, though. Infrastructure…😂
I have to end by saying just how much I enjoyed watching Serena get rejected by not one but basically two different men who she thought she had wrapped around her manipulative little finger. And she was SO sure of herself, so smug with Tuello about her “prospects” in Gilead🤣. Maybe overestimating your charms, Serena?😂😂 I mean, we knew she had no chance with JLaw but I was worried about Tuello for a minute there (STAY STRONG, MARK). The schadenfreude is real, y’all.
Actually no, I’m going to end by saying just how much I enjoyed how fucking SCARED of June Serena is. That’s right, you better RUN 🤣 Just shows what a hypocritical coward she is when she doesn’t have Gilead or Fred or Tuello or her deranged Canadian fan club to hide behind. After June was forced to live under the fear of Serena’s selfish whims, mood swings and cruelty for so long, it is SO gratifying to see the tables turned. That’s not even schadenfreude, that’s just justice.😂
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probably time for this story i guess but when i was a kid there was a summer that my brother was really into making smoothies and milkshakes. part of this was that we didn't have AC and couldn't afford to run fans all day so it was kind of important to get good at making Cool Down Concoctions.
we also had a patch of mint, and he had two impressionable little sisters who had the attitude of "fuck it, might as well."
at one point, for fun, this 16 year old boy with a dream in his eye and scientific fervor in heart just wanted to see how far one could push the idea of "vanilla mint smoothie". how much vanilla extract and how much mint can go into a blender before it truly is inedible.
the answer is 3 cups of vanilla extract, 1/2 cup milk alternative, and about 50 sprigs (not leaves, whole spring) of mint. add ice and the courage of a child. idk, it was summer and we were bored.
the word i would use to describe the feeling of drinking it would maybe be "violent" or perhaps, like. "triangular." my nose felt pristine. inhaling following the first sip was like trying to sculpt a new face. i was ensconced in a mesh of horror. it was something beyond taste. for years after, i assumed those commercials that said "this is how it feels to chew five gum" were referencing the exact experience of this singular viscous smoothie.
what's worse is that we knew our mother would hate that we wasted so much vanilla extract. so we had to make it worth it. we had to actually finish the drink. it wasn't "wasting" it if we actually drank it, right? we huddled around outside in the blistering sun, gagging and passing around a single green potion, shivering with disgust. each sip was transcendent, but in a sort of non-euclidean way. i think this is where i lost my binary gender. it eroded certain parts of me in an acidic gut ecology collapse.
here's the thing about love and trust: the next day my brother made a different shake, and i drank it without complaint. it's been like 15 years. he's now a genuinely skilled cook. sometimes one of the three of us will fuck up in the kitchen or find something horrible or make a terrible smoothie mistake and then we pass it to each other, single potion bottle, and we say try it it's delicious. it always smells disgusting. and then, cerimonious, we drink it together. because that's what family does.
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Shows you should save physically immediately
Over the Garden Wall -- It's being pulled from HBO Max on August 31 and knowing HBO, there's a chance it'll be pulled sooner. *I have now made a Google Drive of all the episodes of OTGW. Please, please, please, PLEASE, save these on a physical device.
The Owl House -- Disney has tried to bury this show many times (giving it a weird release schedule, cutting the budget, etc) and has even cancelled the show. Also, Disney+ is going to nuke their catalogue soon and I doubt TOH will survive*I have now also saved all the episodes of TOH. Click here for the posts with all of the episodes
Amphibia -- I know less about the behind the scenes BS than TOH but Amphibia was screwed over by Disney mainly by poor promotion. Also since one of the protagonist is openly bisexual*, like TOH, I really can't imagine this would survive.*Amphibia has also been saved. Go here for the post with all the episodes.
Steven Universe -- Cartoon Network cancelled Steven Universe and gave it a weird release schedule, it has also just been pulled from HBO Max.
Gravity Falls -- Once again, Disney+ is going to nuke their catalogue at some point in the future and between Wendy being canonically bi, Sheriff Blubs and Deputy Durland being in a relationship, and Alex Hirsch (being the amazing man that he is) constantly calling Disney out on their BS, I imagine that Disney would be more than willing to nuke Gravity Falls. *I’ve also saved Gravity Falls now go to the main post here to see all the episodes.
and most importantly
Every single show, book, game, fanfiction, movie, etc you've ever loved
We now know that at any moment's notice, streaming services can and will just nuke their catalogue without hesitation. If it's digital, it can be removed and there's a likely chance you'll never see it again.
So, please take some time to save anything you love on an external device. It could be a box set (it can be official or fan-made one), a USB, or anything.
If you have a physical copy of something, it's yours forever and no one can take that away from you.
*Edit because I’ve seen some confusion about this. Read this again, it’s “one of the protagonists” not “the protagonist.” Sasha is the one who’s bi, Anne’s sexuality hasn’t been confirmed.
Also in addition to this, people have reblogged this to say Steven Universe is still on HBO. Since I don’t have HBO, I’ve been going off of what people have been saying and I’ve seen it mentioned that HBO was taking off SU. You should still save it though.
*Edit 2 if any of the links here don’t work, check the original post as I might’ve changed/updated them. If that still doesn’t work, send me an ask or DM I’ll give them to you.
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