#and ten years feels especially momentous so i wanted to make a post commemorating the day | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

janumun · 3 years

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This is something unrelated to a request but I was wondering if you're a self taught writer? Either way, what forms of practice do you recommend to improve your writing style? If you have the time to get back to this, I'd really appreciate it, thank you! ^^ <3

Hello, Anon. I would be more than happy to answer your query should it help with your own writing endeavours!

Yes, to your first question; writing is and has always been a past time I've indulged in over the years. My main field of study stands vastly different from what I get up to on Tumblr and Ao3.

In regards to your second question, my answer is pretty much generic— I have been writing fanfiction (and short original stories) for over ten years now.

Pretty much the only surefire way to improve at the craft is to write constantly, and as much as you can.

People would be laughing/horrified if I ever went ahead and published my first ever story here. 🤣🤣

That first draft is going to be horrible, no skirting past that disappointment. But on the bright side (this is something I often do to not feel entirely disappointed in my writing), you are going to look back at some of your older works, fast forward to your current style and catch the ways in which you have improved, exercising that writing muscle.

Two, writing on blindly, so to speak, without sampling other forms of literature, isn't enough. I'm sure the majority of us who're writers, are avid readers too.

We happened to fall in love with another's words before that affection carried over into our own passion for writing.

Read your favorites' works over and over. Go over dialogues/paragraphs that especially make you feel something and try to figure out why exactly it is that you like it so much.

Incorporate it into your own writing.

For example, I have many favorite authors I constantly inhale works from but one particular moment that truly clicked for me and made me go Yes, I want to write in this manner, evoke emotions like this, came with reading Cassandra Clare's The Infernal Devices series.

I adore how organically Clare paints the relationships in between her characters; her angst is a work of art /chef's kiss. Clare's works are what made me feel like I wanted to be the kind of author who can flesh her characters in a way that evokes strong emotions in her readers. [I don't know if that's obvious enough in my stories but that's always something I'm aiming for; character driven rather than plot driven writing.]

An excerpt from one of Clare's books:

Mother, Father:

I write anyway, to commemorate the occasion, the way some make yearly pilgrimages to a grave to remember the death of a loved one. For are we not dead to each other?

I wonder if you knew that I could hear you that day you came for me when I was twelve. I crawled under the bed to block out the sound of you crying my name. But I heard you. I heard mother call for her bach, her little one. I bit my hands until they bled but I did not come down.

Do not be afraid of your writing coming out clunky or all over the place at first.

It may take years to establish your own style of writing or it may be one that constantly evolves (I feel like mine is part of the latter) and that is A-okay.

And while it is important to stay in practice, it is equally important to know your limits and know when your creative juices need a break and you need to kick back and relax.

I'd also like to point you to an excellent blog here on tumblr, @/heywriters (without the /). They carry a rich collection of writing resources, specific writing tips among many other useful posts. ♥️ That's all off the top of my head for now.

Also, at the end, I'd like to make this light and say, while I wish I could look like this while I write:

I usually end up doing this: 😂

#no shame in being the second gif although you're going to beat yourself over it #try not to 😆#asks!#anonymous!#scribbled answers #writing advice (the oldest most generic one)#wish I knew magic tricks to this wizardry

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kiaronna · 6 years

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codenamecesare replied to your post: yo hmu with some of that good shit ongoing fics

maybe they want recs for good ongoing fics?

OH POSSIBLY

Wow okay, sorry for being self-absorbed, friends. SORRY I CAN DO THAT

Warning: I have been reading less lately, and have also been reading some other fandoms (BNHA *cough*)

Here’s a couple fics (most of which I did not actually manage to get to the end of, but which I have enjoyed thus far). PLEASE READ THEM. I won’t be mentioning popular fics I’m following that I think most people already know about. Please be sure to read the tags yourself, because while I mostly write painfully vanilla PG content, it’s not always what I read, mmkay.

THIS ONE: Undiscovered Country. Do it for yourself and your future. I finally started this.

1. without fear, without metaphor: Yuuri was never one to use more words than necessary. Underutilized it, even, his family and friends would remark. Still, there was a certain relief that came with easy communication. Then he started wanting to use words for more. He even ran his mouth quite a few times in the past months, much to his embarrassment. And he quietly admitted to himself that it came with the sudden barrage of Viktor Nikiforov into what he expected to be peaceful life and probable retirement in his hometown.

2. Not Cricket: Victor had wanted to be the Japanese competitor's dance partner, and he could because he didn't have one. Victor had also wanted to be Katsuki Yuuri's coach, and he could because Katsuki didn't have one of those either.Now Victor wanted to be Yuuri's boyfriend- except Yuuri already seemed to have one of those.---Basically, Victor thinks Phichit is Yuuri's boyfriend and is ridiculously jealous.

3. blood is thicker than: “You might be Yuri’s biological parent, Mr. Nikiforov. But I’m his father. If Yuri wants to go with you, that’s one thing,” Yuuri Katsuki’s voice flows quiet and dangerous into the room “but if he doesn’t, don’t think that you’re taking my child away from home,”Or: Victor Nikiforov finds out he has a son. He wants full custody.Katsuki Yuuri isn't going to give up his child that easily.Or: Victor and Yuuri fight a custody battle for Yurio. Shit happens.Or: Yuri Plisetsky starts with one parent, and ends up with two.

4. before it burns me numb: “What do you mean, you had a crush on me?” Yuuri asks. “We’d never even met before the Grand Prix Final last year.” Following their engagement, Victor tells Yuuri the story of how he met, fell for, and pined after Japan's Ace. Not necessarily in that order. An Ep10 coda... with a twist.

If you think Viktor having had a crush on Yuuri for a long time would satisfy all your Viktuuri needs, you’d be right.

5. Sixty Impossible Things: Two weeks after his failure at Sochi, Yuuri receives a text from a mysterious number asking why the fuck he’s ignoring Viktor. So begins Yuri Plisetsky’s all out campaign to get Yuuri to fucking finally text Viktor and end his torment of watching Viktor pine, and so begins Yuuri's descent into a wonderland of texting his idol, meeting his #1 fan(s), and slowly rebuilding his life with a little help from his friends.

*swoony swoon* And some quality Yurio&Yuuri frandship

6. boy next door: “Hi, welcome to the Green Bean,” Yuuri says, in the way that’s become something of a joke between them. “What can I get for you today?”In which Viktor buys way too much coffee from the cute barista at the coffeeshop on the corner, and Yuuri has a terrible crush that Viktor never, ever needs to know about, and somehow it all works out in the end.

Cute A/B/O coffeeshop!

7. offer me (that Deathless Death): It was the curse he and his family were fated to: Death would come for him the moment he turned eighteen, and he could only hope the flimsy wards passed down through the generations would protect him. But Death always won eventually, Death would snatch him up as he had all of his ancestors.But somehow he wasn't what Yuuri had expected. He was a constant presence in his life, barely there. A vigilant spectator to his burgeoning skating career, a gray haired man with a soft expression who found him again and again, waiting for him to let his guard down, but becoming something more, over time."Don't be careless," his sister told him, but they were all careless, in the end.

THE SUMMARY IS LIKE A TRIP ALL BY ITSELF OKAY

8. Lullaby of Birdland: In another world, their story might have started with ‘Hi there’, or ‘Lovely sky tonight’, or ‘Hello, stranger’. Or perhaps something less cliché, something like: ‘A commemorative photo? Sure thing!’But in this one, it starts with an electric blue cocktail, the taste of smoke in the air. And: “You have really talented, um. Fingers.”

I literally only listen to the jazz music I do because of this fic

9. The Long Way Round: In the wake of tragedy and facing change to come, Yuuri and Victor make the ten thousand kilometre journey from Saint Petersburg home to Hasetsu the old fashioned way- on the Trans-Siberian Railway from Moscow to Beijing.

I already knew this would be good because sixpences, but it’s so tragically beautiful

10. Nuclear Hearts Club: Being seventeen and chronically confused isn't always a walk in the park - especially when you've been crushing on your brother's best friend since you were nine. You'd be crazy not to. Victor's the best thing to happen to the world since sliced bread.(Join Yuuri Katsuki on this pine-fueled high school adventure full of teen angst and astronomical fuckery.)

Nothing makes me feel things and cry over prose like butterbeerbitch. I saw there’s a new one-shot too, check that one out!

11. Life Unwoven: Five-Time Consecutive Grand Prix Final Winner Katsuki Yuuri meets Five-Time Consecutive Grand Prix Final Winner Victor Nikiforov.or,In which things are tangled, and untangled, and tangled again. And Victor will always be there to save Yuuri.

*sigh*

12. Human by Choice: When the body of emerging indie director Emil Nekola washes up near the small Oregon town of Quad Axels, FBI Special Agent Yuuri Katsuki is called in to investigate. But as he uncovers more and more of the town's dark secrets, he realises that there are bigger forces at play than previously suspected.After all, still waters run deep, and when you are haunted by your past, you will see ghosts at every turn.

OH HECK YEAH

Archiveofourown writers spookyfoot, xyloophones, mhalachai, and opalish are almost always writing little one-shots, along with... so many other amazing writers, so be sure to check them out for not WIPs but a pretty constant stream of fic.

#codenamecesare #fic rec #there's a lot of... things

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2019dclmed · 5 years

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Departure Day

Departure Day -Thursday, May 23, 2019

With my 16 year old cat, Kealy, having gotten sick many times throughout the day prior (even though she was already on antibiotics), I had another night of lacking sleep due to worry.

I went to sleep around 11:30pm, couldn’t get to sleep, took something at 12:30am, and set my alarm for 6am - in case I needed to see the vet at 7am. Of course I awoke on my own promptly at 5:30am. Miraculously all seemed fine with Kealy (after checking the recordings on my Blink camera from overnight). So I set a new alarm for 7:15am.

I was slow to get up & get in the shower since I didn’t need to leave until 10:30am. So I cleaned up the living room & kitchen, did the final prep & pack of the backpack.

I also made a couple of last minute swaps due to the (sad) decline in forecasted temps.

Grabbed some snuggles in my recliner with the kitty (watching the Rapunzel animated series to get in the mood), & pulled out by 10:35am. I stopped at a grocery near Kara’s to grab last minute gas, Wheat Thins, & caffeine pills in Indy.

Our themed-luggage tags. We tend to make these for “big” trips!

This is Kara. I slept well, as I often do, and having finished nearly all packing the night before had a quiet, easy morning. I had even finished emptying my work inbox the night before so other than a few last small to do items, I got to just tidy up around the house, say goodbye to my plants and wait for Gayle.

We left by 12:05pm for lunch at Panera. Our flight was scheduled for 3:30pm.

First it was delayed about ten minutes. Then delayed more. Then the news came: Ground Stop. Due to East Coast storms impacting Philadelphia, everything was stopped from even heading in that direction.

We started talking about rebooking, as it seemed we’d miss our connection in PHL. However, the plane started boarding and figured we’d deal with it at PHL - at least we’d be closer to Barcelona and at an American Airlines hub.

I ended up sobbing all the way to PHL.

Huge Sidenote: Most people, including myself, would read all this and figure, “What’s the big deal? So you take a different flight? Maybe your luggage is late?” For me, this was 14 months of planning falling apart and we hadn’t even left our home airport yet. It was hours of work and planning for this flight, to find an option that would allow me to sleep (as I’m a terrible international/eastbound flier) and in a budget I could afford.

That’s right folks, I mention that almighty dollar, as for some a trip like this can be a stretch. I have a great professional job, but I also chose a profession and position that can be lacking financial rewards. A “big trip” like this is something I need to plan years in advance, which I didn’t have this time, and wasn’t strong enough to tell Kara no. And putting it off just one year woudn’t work since I have to lead a study abroad next May. So this had been a YEAR of scrimping and saving, living somewhat like a “poor college student”, only to completely lose our business class seats. (Yes, I realize as I type this many are rolling their eyes, but in this moment my reality was crushed.)

We landed at PHL at 7:12pm; our connecting flight left at 7:10pm! We were sent to stand in line at a nearby customer service gate, while having learned from the past, I simultaneously called AA. I put in for a call-back as we waited in the line. The Customer Service desk tells us since we’re international, we have to “go over there” to get help - from C31 to A17!

During the trek I didn't hear or feel my phone go off - twice! - of AA calling me back. We initially couldn’t find the international help desk tucked in a set-back cove past A17, but finally got ourselves into that line. I finally noticed the 3rd call-back attempt and after many minutes was told there were ZERO options for anything arriving before… SUNDAY! (Our cruise was leaving Saturday!) Another meltdown, now from anger, had set-in. The phone agent told us to stay in the line we were standing in, that the in-person agent might have more options. What? How?

Finally at the front of the line at 8:30pm we were offered two Economy (not our booked business) seats leaving in 30 minutes to…Paris with a 5 hour layover to Barcelona (BCN). (Trying to rebook us was so challenging, this flight would be via Air France, which is the SkyTeam-Delta, not OneWorld-American network.) It’s a testament to how desperate we were that we jumped at that option, with virtually no questions asked.

When we arrived at the gate to get our seats, they were already boarding! To get any seats together, we were in the very last row- 35 G&H (which gave me deja vu for the very first time I went to Europe). I was able to shoot off a quick email to Barcelona Chocolate Tours, letting them know we couldn’t make our noon tour, as we wouldn’t be landing until nearly 6pm and respectfully requested a refund. We had a suitable Economy dinner and took ALL the drugs we packed to try to get even a little sleep. I think I maybe slept through 2.5-2.75 Harry Potter 1 movies.

This is Kara. Gayle did a good job recapping this crazy set of events. I’ll add in here that we posted a photo to Facebook to commemorate the crazy turn of events as a last notification to our friends and family of what our status was. This specific photo is very important later in the story.

Breakfast on the plane was yogurt & figs - gross. So I had my packed protein bar. Deplaning we certainly asked for help knowing where to go next. As we suspected, there was no luggage when we got to Paris (CDG). Went to Baggage Service and was told to wait until we got to BCN to put in a luggage inquiry. What?! This makes no sense, especially for how long all this might take. Kara called AA and was again told to wait until BCN.

The small bit of “raging idealist” in me thought our luggage should be waiting for us in BCN. That AA knew we were going to BCN via our original ticket and the Air France ticket showed the same. So throw them on whatever the next BCN flight is. Period.

After enduring the long layover at CDG (in a new beautiful Air France, but packed terminal), I put my headphones on to BCN because 1) Chatty Kathy was next to me, 2) Kara and I were 2 rows apart, 3) the aisle dude commandeered the armrest, and 4) Kara & I were both in middle seats.

Arrive at BCN - no luggage. We wait in line at the American luggage desk only to be told to go to the next bay to stand in line for Air France, as apparently it’s the final airlines responsibility to deal with the luggage. So yes, there I am again having a meltdown. Why? We’re told to put in an incident report, which requested our entire cruise port itinerary and that our bags haven’t left PHL! At this time I also got email offering us a chocolate tour for Sunday, but at this late time no refund would be given. Talk about adding insult to injury.

Meltdown Sidenote: Again, many might question the freak out. Here was a much bigger issue. They were now giving us indication they had no idea when or if we might get our bags and we were about to embark on a 7 night cruise with nothing but the literal clothes on our back and whatever snacks & tech we had in our small carry-ons! We knew our same PHL-BCN flight was leaving that night at 7:10pm with an arrival at 9am Saturday morning and basically begged to get our bags on that flight! As it was currently only about noon PHL time, we knew they had plenty of time, but all we were told was they would put in the inquiry (via tele-text?!) and PHL would have to act on it in time. If our bags didn’t arrive on that flight, we’d have only a couple of hours to try to go to unfamiliar stores and buy everything we’d need for PJs, toiletries, dinner clothes, port adventures clothes, and much more.

From Kara - this is where that photo we posted on Facebook came into play. Some might call my family intense. Nearly all the time I call them loving and incredibly supportive. We use an app called GroupMe and we also use Google Location Services to keep track of one another. Gayle and I had difficulty getting on wi-fi at CDG so while my family knew we’d made it there okay because my phone had connected and updated my location, I didn’t really share an update. When we got to BCN and were dealing with the aforementioned request being sent by tele-text, I noticed in the GroupMe app that my aunt mentioned that she’d let a cousin in Phoenix who works for American Airlines know about our plight. My cousin found our record using the photo we’d posted with our boarding pass and, thankfully, our luggage was on the same record as we had actually booked this as one reservation which is not our norm.

Before leaving BCN we somehow had the wherewithal to request the luggage be held at BCN if it arrived, as we didn’t trust and couldn’t take a risk of passing it or a delay in delivery to the hotel &/or ship. We’d determined no matter what we’d return to the airport seeking our luggage Saturday morning, as it was the only real strategy we could take control of.

We finally got to our hotel, AC Hotel Marriott Diagonal D’Illa, around 7:30-8pm and just like in all telling TV shows & films - yes, it was raining. It was fatefully connected to a mall. We ended up with basic chicken sandwiches (and by this I mean crustless white bread with shredded chicken) and water for dinner. I did pick up a piece of chocolate cake, more out of habit than want.

That I couldn’t even bring myself to visit the Disney Store tells you how despondent I was.

Our hotel room was like a “camp version” of a hotel room - just the bare basics. We showered (using every amenity kit we could from the hotel), put our same clothes back on, and borrowed electrical adapters to charge our phones.

By absolute fate we had initially posted a photo of ourselves with our boarding passes on Facebook. I thought I’d covered our confirmation number, but apparently not. Via the “Monroe Family Network” (Kara’s family), her Aunt Idris sent our confirmation number to a distant cousin who happens to work for… American Airlines Customer Service! Through Idris we were told Cousin Kimberley spoke with a supervisor at PHL who had located our bags and would “do their best” to put them on our requested evening flight to arrive at 9am Saturday morning. Another follow-up re-affirmed.

Friday night we also logged onto the Air France baggage site as instructed. The only thing it showed was “luggage found - awaiting confirmation”. At some point I decided trying to apply my social media knowledge (as I’m also a known blogger for a popular TV series). I sent the AA Twitter account a Direct Message with our confirmation number begging them to put our bags on the PHL-BCN 7:10pm-9am flight. Around 10:30pm we got a positive response that yes this would happen!

Between this & Kara’s cousin’s messages, there were more hesitant and slight tears (of relief?), as we feared getting our hopes up.

Continuing to pile on, there was loud party music raging outside our room from somewhere we couldn’t see. So Kara looked for some brainless TV. With my experience in Europe I assured her if she looked long enough she’s probably find NCIS &/or Big Bang Theory. Sure enough Gibbs & the team gave us a slight calm in the midst of our storm. We tried to go to sleep by 11pm (which was only 5pm back home).

I woke up just past 2am. On the AA app it showed our confirmation number to check-in for our PHL-BCN flight - yay! But for a Saturday departure/Sunday arrival - NO! I figured this was our bags and was again defeated. I freaked-out internally while Kara slept. But the AA website showed our bags were loaded onto the requested flight at 3:20pm? Huh? So I took more drugs to get back to sleep.

This is Kara. There isn’t much I can add to this day other than a little more about my, as my niece Ashley said in a Facebook post commenting later on in the week, “creepy” family. Yes, sometimes we are remarkably creepy in how we keep up with each other. But, when push comes to shove, having a team of people in your immediate circle who are always in your corner is reassuring. I’d been checking in with them each time we got a network connection and giving them updates. I got to “meet” my cousin’s wife Kimberley for the first time through this situation and look forward to meeting her in person someday. The family was also watching my Google Location icon pop up all over the world all through the trip. It truly is a good thing to know you’ve got people and they’ve got you too.

Disclaimer: Gayle is a travel agent with Authorized Disney Travel Planner agency - Off to Neverland Travel. Contact me today for a no-obligation quote!

Next up: Embarkation Day! Would the luggage actually arrive?

#2019dclmed

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breeeliss · 7 years

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[Femslash February]: Valentine’s Day

*posts the valentine’s day prompt two weeks after valentine’s day*

this is the last prompt for alyanette though! tomorrow is a new week of prompts with a new femslash pairing. wonder which one it’ll be....? (i actually do not have the answer to this question pretend i’m being clever and secretive)

Day 14: Valentine’s Day (Alyanette)

Words: 1949

Link to Archive of Our Own: [AO3]

[Previous: Theme Park] [Next: Baking]

Somewhere in the back of Marinette’s head, she knew she should’ve heard her phone alarm by now. She was supposed to have set it for half an hour so that she’d have enough time to get ready for school and actually make it on time. It certainly felt like half an hour had already passed. Probably time to start getting dressed.

Or. She could....not do that.

Yeah. That sounded better.

Alya laughed. “I think you left your phone on Do Not Disturb again. It’s definitely been over half an hour.”

Marinette quieted her with another kiss, smiling when Alya groaned into her mouth at the feel of Marinette’s nails dragging along Alya’s back, pushing her tank top up inch by inch and revealing more warm skin for her fingers to knead into. “Alarm didn’t go off, doesn’t mean we have to get ready,” she muttered against her lips.

“That....is a very poor argument,” Alya countered.

“I can give you a better one.” She leaned up and trapped Alya’s bottom lip in between her own, gently biting down until Alya sighed out, growled a curse that Marinette didn’t quite hear, and kissed her back harder. Marinette smiled as she licked along Alya’s lips and moaned when Alya’s tongue slid gently against hers, making her toes curl into the sheets of her bed and grip the backs of Alya’s thighs. She could feel Alya tangling her fingers in her hair and only briefly bemoaned the hard time she was going to have combing out the tangles later. She was about to tell Alya to calm down with it, but then she started shifting and moving her hips against Marinette’s, and all coherent thought had zipped out of her head. She finished kicking her sheets and comforters to the foot of her bed to give them more room while she marveled out how her body was shivering and burning all at the same time.

Marinette was barely aware of Alya’s cell phone ringing next to the pillows piled around them. Alya scrambled around for it blindly, answered the call, and put the call on speaker phone. Marinette took advantage of Alya’s distraction and started kissing, licking, and nipping down the side of Alya’s neck. She snickered when Alya accidentally let out a moan and shifted away from the slap Alya left on her shoulder. “This better be good.”

“You were the one who told me to call you twenty minutes before school started,” Adrien defended over the phone. “I have done that.”

“Ugh, school is starting to sound increasingly more unappealing the more the morning goes on.” Alya bit her lip and sighed out her nose when Marinette started leaving small love bites on her collarbone. “Make sure I can cover those up later,” she whispered.

“No promises,” Marinette smirked.

“Oh my God, are you guys making out?”

“It’s Valentine’s Day,” Alya defended. “You didn’t see me -- ahh -- complaining about the kissing photo you and Nino posted on Instagram this morning. S-Super corny caption, by the way -- mmhm~ -- low-key judging.”

“Stop groaning into the phone, I’m in school. Nino can hear you and he’s sitting next to me.”

Nino leaned in closer to Adrien’s phone. “Stay safe ladies!”

“Stop encouraging them,” Adrien scolded. “Look, you guys have like fifteen minutes to get ready. Marinette’s running on ten lates this month. I doubt she needs another one.”

Marinette whined loudly. “But school is boring and Alya isn’t.”

“You guys will have two hours during lunch pause to run back home and keep making out. Nino and I won’t even be offended. We promise.”

“If anything we’re probably going to run back to Adrien’s place and -- ”

“Do nothing! Nothing that is anyone’s business but ours!” Adrien squeaked out. “Look just, hurry up, alright?”

Alya rolled her eyes. “Fine, fine, we’re coming.” She hung up the phone and threw it over her shoulder and back onto Marinette’s mattress. She gently pushed on Marinette’s chest until Marinette flopped back against her pillows, pouting marvelously.

“I don’t support this.”

“Babe, if you’re late again, your parents are going to get another note home, and you’re going to get grounded again.”

“Good. You can climb into my window and stay in bed with me all day while we cuddle and make out and eat all the Valentine’s chocolates we bought yesterday.”

Alya paused for a moment. “....don’t make me consider that! We’re going to school. That’s final.”

Alya started climbing down the steps from Marinette’s loft while Marinette kept complaining. “But Moooooooommmmm!!!!”

“Stop throwing a temper tantrum and get dressed,” Alya laughed. “We’re going to be so late.”

Marinette sucked her teeth loudly and stomped down the stairs from her bed, grabbing up the brush on her vanity and roughly pulling it through her hair. “Valentine’s Day should be a holiday. We should get the day off.”

“You only say that because you aren’t single. This time last year you were saying we should ban it because it’s a capitalist and consumerist holiday.”

“Alright,” Marinette shrugged. “We ban it, still get the day off, that way single people can do their thing, and we don’t have to leave our bed.”

Alya sorted through Marinette’s closet and grabbed a tank top and hoodie that she’d left here the last time she stayed over. “That doesn’t make sense and you know it.” She stared in the mirror hanging on the door of Marinette’s wardrobe and prodded her neck. “Thanks for the bruises, by the way, you little trouble maker.”

Marinette grinned back at her sweetly. “They were placed there with love.”

“Fine, I guess it’s just a hoodie and jeans today.”

“You look good in hoodies and jeans, I don’t know why you’re complaining.”

“It’s because I have to wear hoodies literally all the time because of you. Exhibit A.”

“You sounded pretty happy about it a minute ago.”

“Ignoring you!”

Marinette giggled and started packing her backpack while Alya shuffled through all of her homework sheets and bemoaned the fact that she’d completely forgotten to do her geography homework. They were definitely going to be a little worse for wear today -- Marinette’s hair was a lost cause and Alya wasn’t going to have time to do her makeup -- but Marinette was too hopped up on giddiness to even bother caring about what smart-aleck comment Chloe was going to throw at them today. It was a silly day to get excited over, and by itself it didn’t really mean anything, but their Valentine’s Days never felt like this.

Before it always consisted of Marinette buying three cheap boxes of chocolates that were exactly the same -- one for Adrien, one for Nino, one for Alya -- and writing an especially long and heartfelt note on Alya’s to let her know that she was especially important to her. At some point, there would be bitter complaining about being single, spiteful rom-com marathons, and eating spoonfuls of leftover chocolate frosting from the bakery. It felt comfortably normal -- the sort of thing you always got up to with your best friend when the two of you had no one else to lean on except each other on those dark and romance-infested holidays.

But it was a funny little coincidence when you and your best friend ritualize making fun of Valentine’s Day so much over the years that you eventually fall in love along the way and end up in the amusing position of wanting to recreate all of those gross, sappy, overly-affectionate gestures with each other. In reality, that was the only person that Marinette felt was even worth all of the scrambling around for presents and dates and long sleepovers for.

She quietly opened up her desk drawer and pulled out the small chain she’d spent half her allowance engraving with Alya’s initials. She’d showed it to Nino and Adrien before deciding to give it to her, afraid to do something that felt so sentimental and meaningful without getting approval for it first, worried that gifts like this only four months in were simply too much. Both boys had stayed quiet for a moment, turning the charm over in their hands and holding the chain up to the light, before eventually letting their eyes soften in time with their growing smiles, telling her without any words at all that it was perfect.

Being with Alya felt a lot like that sometimes -- like their affection and love grew and spread so quickly, quicker than it did for most people, but that it just made sense for them. There was no need to question how they became friends so suddenly, or how their friendship turned into a deep love without either of them even realizing it. Plus, that sort of unexpectedness was refreshing, sort of like opening up a new box every day and not knowing what beautiful thing you were going to end up with next. If she wanted her love life to be anything, it was an adventure.

“Hey, Alya?”

“Yeah, babe?” She was picking up her bag and slinging it over her shoulder. “You ready? We have like ten minutes to run over.”

“Yeah, no I’m ready. But, uh. Can we wait a sec? I wanted to give you something.”

Alya fiddled around with the strap to her bag. “Give me what?”

Marinette smiled softly and pulled the chain out of the pocket of her jacket. She saw Alya’s eyes widened and interrupted her before she could speak. “Don’t freak out, it’s honestly nothing. I had the money to spend on it and I guess I wanted to commemorate our first Valentine’s Day as a couple. And I know that’s cheesy and sentimental, but I’m happy, so leave me alone.”

Alya blinked at the the silver chain hanging from Marinette’s fingers and laughed in disbelief. “Wait, stop it, all I got you was a stupid phone case with our picture on it.”

“Don’t call that stupid, I love it!” Marinette insisted. She walked behind Alya and tapped her shoulder to get her to lift her hair away from her neck. “And I didn’t do this expecting something crazy in return. I just had a good feeling about it, and decided to go for it. Fitting, when you consider our track record.”

“How much did you pay for this?” Alya asked, holding the charm while Marinette fasted the clasp.

“A bit, admittedly, but seriously. I was happy to do it.” She moved back in front of Alya and kissed the tip of her nose. “All I ask is that you actually wear it and not stuff in the back of your jewelry box like you do with all the other chains you own.”

“You know damn well this is the only chain I’m going to be wearing every day, right?”

“I was hoping that was going to be the reaction.”

Alya rolled her eyes and kissed Marinette again, softer, gentler, and with her fingers tracing circles on the apples of Marinette’s cheeks. “Thank you. And I don’t care what you say, I will think of a way to one up you next year.”

Marinette snorted. “You do that. I’ll go ask Ladybug if she’d be willing to do a Valentine’s Day exclusive next year.”

“See you can’t do that, that’s cheating! What the hell do I do to beat that?”

“You have a year to figure it out,” Marinette assured, looping her arm around Alya’s. “I have the utmost faith in you.”

Alya fingered the chain around her neck and nodded. “I’ll do my best. Now come on. Let’s try and keep you from getting a late slip for the billionth time.”

#miraculous ladybug #alyanette #alya cesaire #marinette dupain-cheng #alyanette fanfiction #miraculous ladybug fanfiction #my writing #femslash february 2017 #femslash february alyanette edition #valentines day

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andrewdburton · 5 years

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Financial advice from my father (when I was nineteen)

“Who was there for your father when he died?” Kim asked me a few moments ago. She's interested in becoming a death doula, so she's reading a book about end-of-life care.

“It's odd you should ask that today,” I said after I told her the story of my father's six-year battle with cancer.

“Why?” she asked.

“Today is the equivalent day in my life as the day when Dad died in his,” I said. “It's ten days until I turn fifty. Dad died ten days before his fiftieth birthday. So, it's a somber day for me. I'll be thinking of him all day.”

Actually, I've been thinking of Dad all week.

It started when I published Naomi Veak's story about how she learned to stop feeling hopeless about money. In that article, Veak shared a letter her mother sent her when she was nineteen years old. Veak was a poor kid at a rich school, and she was struggling to figure out finances. Her mother offered some words of wisdom.

I had the exact same thing happen to me at the exact same age at the exact same college. I was a poor boy at this rich school. During my sophomore year at Willamette University, when I was nineteen, my father wrote me a letter filled with financial advice.

Today seems like a good day to share it with you folks.

Everything that follows — starting with the title “J.D.'s Points to Ponder” — is from my father except that I've added a few notes in order to provide context to some of the things Dad wrote. (If you're super interested, I've uploaded a PDF version of Dad's letter.)

Here's my father's financial advice to me when I was nineteen years old. (This is unedited. All misspellings are his.)

J.D.'s Points to Ponder

Warning — Make sure you read them all. There may be some surprises in them so read them all or you will miss them.

#1 Your scholarship is irreplacable. There is no way that you or I can make up $9500.00 a year difference. Study comes first. Before you panic, read on. I hear you talk about working and unless I missed something somewhere you are talking 32 hours a week at least or was that 24 hours a month on campus?

J.D.'s note: I was fortunate to attend Willamette on a full merit scholarship, otherwise I wouldn't have been able to afford it. During my sophomore year, I really did work 32 hours per week. I worked three (sometimes four) part-time jobs.

#2 You were successful at saving a little over $1000.00 this summer. That's an achievement for you. We will try to do better next summer won't we.

#3 Nutrition is important. Don't slight it. It is your body that supports your mind. If you slight your body you slight your mind so eat your green beans.

#4 Wear clean underwear.

#5 You used to play lots of video games. One of them had a rocket and you had an energy level you had to worry about. Energy was used to travel and to shoot at the enemy. Life is a big videogame. In our society money is the energy. There are certain things you have to or should do so make sure don't shoot so many asteroids just for the fun of it that you deplete your energy level and someone has to flash on your screen —GAME OVER—.

#6 Girls can be handy. They are nice to talk to and smooch and some times they take pity on poor helpless males and cook them a meal + iron for them.

#7 I have two ounces of yellow metal left among other things. A good inducement to get your father thinking the right direction would be for you to make a budget and keep track of how well you stick to it.

J.D.'s note: As I've mentioned before, my father was into gold. But he was dumb about it. He bought high and sold low. Here, he's suggesting he might give me an ounce or two of his gold if I keep a budget.

#8 While we are on the subject let me throw out some ideas that would point to reasons for subconscious compulsive spending.

a. When you were little mom was busy in the business and would buy you a new toy almost everyday. It was a way of saying “I feel so guilty — here, this toy is my love for you.”

Your dad played the same game only it was in large a grand ways — tropical fish instead of gold fish etc.

The result would be a compulsion to spend when lonely. The cure is to “look at them and sigh and know they love you.” You are a big boy now and it is time to say goodby to that part of parenting you never had. Please don't wait till you're 40 to do so. I can think of a zillion mistakes we made but I will guartee [sic] you that we did the best we knew how. The answer is for you to identify and acknowledge the mistakes for what they are. Then you will be able to see the love that was there too and compulsion will leave.

b. Don't forget the Saint Helens tee shirts. I can bet you tap into those feelings a dozen times a day as you walk around campus and compare your situation with that of some of the others. Spending and collecting is a way of trying to prove that you have it too.

J.D.'s note: In 1980, things were especially tight for my parents. Dad was unemployed and there was little money to buy clothes for three growing boys. Before I started sixth grade that fall, Mom shopped the close-out racks. Some of the t-shirts she got me commemorated the Mount St. Helens eruption a few months earlier. I hated those shirts and was embarrassed to wear them, but my parents made me do so.

Cure

If this is the case the cure is to focus on the objective — getting through school — and realizing that the “it” that they have is privelege that come with wealthy parents. No matter what you spend you will not create wealthy parents. Focus on the “it” that you have that no amount of money can buy. Looks, brains, nice to be around, kindness, talent to name a few. Just remember, “you never saw a fish wishing he were a frog.”

J.D.'s note: Looking back with 2019 eyes, I find it interesting that my father mentions “privilege” here. Remember, Dad had a love-hate relationship with wealth. He wanted to get rich himself, but he resented the folks who already had money.

#9 Your parents love you! We talk about you everyday. it wouldn't hurt to call sometimes and invite them down for a minute or two. They might come with bags of groceries in each arm.

#10 I know the time will come when you may go on an adventure such as a move out of state or a trip to Australia or whatever else crosses that mind of yours. We will probably throw out all kinds of cautions. That's just what parents do but follow your dreams anyhow. Please don't ever move off without letting us know where you are and dropping a note once in a while just to say your OK. Parents have spent 18 years listening to your every breath and loosing sleep if you missed a breath and they just can't get out of that habit easily. You can do most anything you want and you will have our approval as long as we know you are OK.

#11 We need to get the title transfered on the car + some repairs made soon. The new guy I hired is also a mechanic so plan a Saturday out here real soon.

#12 If you maintain your apartment address over the summer it may be worth $3500 in grants next fall. You can come stay with us but you need to prove you are living on your own to be considered on your own income.

Final Thoughts Looking back, it's clear that I inherited most of my money blueprint from my mother and father. I picked up the same bad habits they had. But being a poor boy at a rich school led me to develop some new bad habits of my own. Dad could see these bad habits forming and was trying to help me before I got into trouble.

I didn't heed his advice, obviously, and so ended up deep in debt. How would my life have been different if I'd listened to his words of warning? I don't know.

Although my relationship with Dad was strained at the end of his life, I admired him a great deal. He had his faults — including poor money skills — but he was a dreamer, and he loved his family.

The post Financial advice from my father (when I was nineteen) appeared first on Get Rich Slowly.

from Finance https://www.getrichslowly.org/financial-advice-from-my-father/ via http://www.rssmix.com/

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watsonrodriquezie · 6 years

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14 Healthier Ways to Spend Black Friday

For most of my life, Thanksgiving was spared the overt commercialization of the other holidays. Christmas has the gifts, Halloween the candy and costumes, Valentine’s the chocolates, roses, jewelry, and guilt—perfect avenues for commercial interests. But Thanksgiving genuinely felt different, as if it was only about getting together with friends and relatives over a crispy-skinned bird and offering gratitude for what we had and who was still with us.

These days, commercialization has crashed the party. You’ve got Black Friday. Then Small Business Saturday. Then Cyber Monday. (Giving Tuesday I can get behind.) The “Black Friday” deals on Amazon started going last week and should continue well past the holiday.

I get it. That’s how the business world works. And people have the day off. They’re up early enough to start shopping right away, since tucking away 4000 calories in a single sitting the night before probably put them to bed by nine. Most importantly, people are jonesing for some ritual to commemorate the passing of another holiday. Sacrificing one’s sleep, free time, and money to the commerce god BOGO seemingly does the trick, especially if you get a killer deal and everyone else is doing it. You get swept up in the moment—the power of the crowd, the knowledge that in every town across this great big country of ours, millions of your fellow citizens are flooding the stores in search of a good bargain.

Yet, there are other ways to connect to that feeling of unification. There are other ways to celebrate. We can form new rituals that don’t revolve around the acquisition of material goods.

Like what? What could a “Primal Friday” look like?

1. Sleep In

Seriously. You know you want to. Imagine how much better you’ll feel than the folks who dragged themselves out of bed at 4:00 a.m. Sleep is the absolute best.

2. Volunteer Your Time and Resources

Deliver charitable contributions to a local organization, or volunteer to help distribute them to those in need. Bring groceries and good old-fashioned funds to a local food shelf. Donate clothes and housewares to nonprofit stores that benefit area organizations. Volunteer for the day at a homeless shelter, community program, or animal rescue organization. Adopt a family for the holiday season and shop for them instead.

Research demonstrates a physiological benefit to our altruistic ventures (e.g. lower stress, better sleep, enhanced immune function, and reduced pain), and even it didn’t, it’s a nice, virtuous thing to do. The key is to feel genuinely emotionally invested in our volunteer endeavors. Whatever feels meaningful, pursue it.

3. Work With Your Hands

This can mean almost anything. Expand yourself and do something a loved one will appreciate. Send humorous postcards to friends. Knit or carve a gift for someone special. Make wreaths or decorative winter planters for neighbors. Whip up some Primal jerky, gorp, tapenade, sauces, or infused vodka for friends. Finally tackle that little house project you’ve been putting off. Do some fall gardening.

4. Take In a Cultural Event

Skip the throngs at the mall and head for the concert hall, local theater, or community center. Expand your horizons, and enjoy a communal atmosphere without the stampede.

5. Make a Day for Reminiscing (and Record the Occasion For Future Enjoyment)

Gather around to watch old family movies or slide shows on the computer. Tell your favorite stories of past holidays. Get a family photo taken, or videotape some play time in the backyard. It will be a more meaningful keepsake for this year’s holiday season that whatever you could’ve bought.

6. Invite the Neighbors For a Casual Open House

Doubly so if you’ve never done anything like this before and barely know their names. Sure, many of them will be chasing sales in the wee hours of the morning. No matter. They’ll be back. Throw together an informal, “post-sale” brunch or a cocktail hour spread. They’ll appreciate the hospitality and the return to a saner way of celebrating the holiday weekend.

7. Play In the Leaves

I know you’ve got some laying around somewhere nearby. Go play in them, preferably with family and/or friends. The massive leaf piles were my favorite part of fall in New England. We’d have wet leaf fights, leaf wrestling matches, leaf diving competitions (you need at least four feet of densely packed leaves to break your fall). Though if you live on the outskirts of town, or the pile butts up against the forest, beware of ticks. The little jerks love residing in dark, dank leaf piles.

8. Rake the Leaves

Playing in a pile of leaves is an exultation of the chaos of nature. There are tens of thousands of individual leaves, and they’re absolutely everywhere once you’re done. It’s fun (especially for the kiddos), but then you also have to restore order by raking them up. Another option is to mow the leaves and start a compost pile.

9. Do a Cold Plunge or Cold Shower

Exposing your body to cold water is a reset button on just about everything. It also boosts immune function and mood.

10. Train Outside

Hitting the gym is great, but why not do something different, somewhere different? Run some sprints outside. Swing a kettlebell. Get a game of Ultimate or basketball together. Go to the park early enough and do tai chi with the middle-aged Chinese people. Go trail running.

11. Seek Out the Light-Hearted

Hit a comedy club, or curl up with some loved ones and your favorite funny movies. Research shows that laughter reduces stress (unlike lines at the mall), boosts our immune function, relaxes our muscles, enhances circulation, relieves tensions, and decreases pain. Even if it didn’t do those things, laugher feels great. Isn’t that enough?

12. Prep Your Leftovers

Cooked poultry gets weird pretty quickly. If you wait more than a couple days to deal with the leftovers, they won’t be as fresh or tasty. You might even start getting that poultry slime, in which case all bets are off and you have to throw everything away.

Take an hour or so to get everything organized. Remove all the meat from the bones and set it aside. you can do so much with leftover turkey, from just treating it as a simple protein source to making turkey tetrazzini with spaghetti squash. I like chopping it roughly, adding some celery, some Primal mayo, some homemade cranberry sauce, and sometimes some hot sauce for Thanksgiving turkey salad. Make some turkey soup. Make bone broth. While others are eating food court Panda Express in between brawls over 2-for-1 down comforters, you’re getting the next week’s worth of healthy meals ready.

13. Go On an Outdoor Pilgrimage

The fresh crisp fall air is perfect for a long, hard outdoor excursion. You can push up the intensity without overheating and getting sweaty. Climb a certain mountain in your area. Hit a challenging trail. Walk the full distance of a local urban trail. Be in the moment, in that place. Allow the experience to dismiss all the buzz and distractions. Use the time to center yourself on what matters to you this holiday season. Make it the beginning of an annual (or weekly) tradition.

14. Finally, Drink Up Every Bit of Leisure

Read fiction while taking a hot bath. Watch good TV or film. Binge, even. I always use this day to watch A Christmas Story (wrong holiday, but still), and while it’s hilarious, it’s also incredibly touching. One of my favorite scenes is when the parents sit together, quietly enjoying the tree while the kids fall asleep and the snow falls outside.

Sometimes the best part of a holiday is the quiet hours after the agenda’s been satisfied and the dishes are washed. It’s somehow the part I always enjoy the most. It’s when people are most unscheduled and unfettered. The best conversations unfold amidst the comfortable silence. Why rush it? Just sit with it. The best of life so often happens in the lulls, the interludes, the end of a great evening. Don’t miss it.

Thanks for reading today, everybody. On Friday, the Worker Bees will be showing how they’re spending their Black Friday Primal-style. Be sure to stop by, and have a great holiday week.

Want to make fat loss easier? Try the Definitive Guide for Troubleshooting Weight Loss for free here.

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milenasanchezmk · 6 years

Text

14 Healthier Ways to Spend Black Friday

Yet, there are other ways to connect to that feeling of unification. There are other ways to celebrate. We can form new rituals that don’t revolve around the acquisition of material goods.

Like what? What could a “Primal Friday” look like?

1. Sleep In

Seriously. You know you want to. Imagine how much better you’ll feel than the folks who dragged themselves out of bed at 4:00 a.m. Sleep is the absolute best.

2. Volunteer Your Time and Resources

3. Work With Your Hands

4. Take In a Cultural Event

Skip the throngs at the mall and head for the concert hall, local theater, or community center. Expand your horizons, and enjoy a communal atmosphere without the stampede.

5. Make a Day for Reminiscing (and Record the Occasion For Future Enjoyment)

6. Invite the Neighbors For a Casual Open House

7. Play In the Leaves

8. Rake the Leaves

9. Do a Cold Plunge or Cold Shower

Exposing your body to cold water is a reset button on just about everything. It also boosts immune function and mood.

10. Train Outside

11. Seek Out the Light-Hearted

12. Prep Your Leftovers

13. Go On an Outdoor Pilgrimage

14. Finally, Drink Up Every Bit of Leisure

Thanks for reading today, everybody. On Friday, the Worker Bees will be showing how they’re spending their Black Friday Primal-style. Be sure to stop by, and have a great holiday week.

Want to make fat loss easier? Try the Definitive Guide for Troubleshooting Weight Loss for free here.

0 notes

fishermariawo · 6 years

Text

14 Healthier Ways to Spend Black Friday

Yet, there are other ways to connect to that feeling of unification. There are other ways to celebrate. We can form new rituals that don’t revolve around the acquisition of material goods.

Like what? What could a “Primal Friday” look like?

1. Sleep In

Seriously. You know you want to. Imagine how much better you’ll feel than the folks who dragged themselves out of bed at 4:00 a.m. Sleep is the absolute best.

2. Volunteer Your Time and Resources

3. Work With Your Hands

4. Take In a Cultural Event

Skip the throngs at the mall and head for the concert hall, local theater, or community center. Expand your horizons, and enjoy a communal atmosphere without the stampede.

5. Make a Day for Reminiscing (and Record the Occasion For Future Enjoyment)

6. Invite the Neighbors For a Casual Open House

7. Play In the Leaves

8. Rake the Leaves

9. Do a Cold Plunge or Cold Shower

Exposing your body to cold water is a reset button on just about everything. It also boosts immune function and mood.

10. Train Outside

11. Seek Out the Light-Hearted

12. Prep Your Leftovers

13. Go On an Outdoor Pilgrimage

14. Finally, Drink Up Every Bit of Leisure

Thanks for reading today, everybody. On Friday, the Worker Bees will be showing how they’re spending their Black Friday Primal-style. Be sure to stop by, and have a great holiday week.

Want to make fat loss easier? Try the Definitive Guide for Troubleshooting Weight Loss for free here.

0 notes

cristinajourdanqp · 6 years

Text

14 Healthier Ways to Spend Black Friday

Yet, there are other ways to connect to that feeling of unification. There are other ways to celebrate. We can form new rituals that don’t revolve around the acquisition of material goods.

Like what? What could a “Primal Friday” look like?

1. Sleep In

Seriously. You know you want to. Imagine how much better you’ll feel than the folks who dragged themselves out of bed at 4:00 a.m. Sleep is the absolute best.

2. Volunteer Your Time and Resources

3. Work With Your Hands

4. Take In a Cultural Event

Skip the throngs at the mall and head for the concert hall, local theater, or community center. Expand your horizons, and enjoy a communal atmosphere without the stampede.

5. Make a Day for Reminiscing (and Record the Occasion For Future Enjoyment)

6. Invite the Neighbors For a Casual Open House

7. Play In the Leaves

8. Rake the Leaves

9. Do a Cold Plunge or Cold Shower

Exposing your body to cold water is a reset button on just about everything. It also boosts immune function and mood.

10. Train Outside

11. Seek Out the Light-Hearted

12. Prep Your Leftovers

13. Go On an Outdoor Pilgrimage

14. Finally, Drink Up Every Bit of Leisure

Thanks for reading today, everybody. On Friday, the Worker Bees will be showing how they’re spending their Black Friday Primal-style. Be sure to stop by, and have a great holiday week.

Want to make fat loss easier? Try the Definitive Guide for Troubleshooting Weight Loss for free here.

0 notes

cynthiamwashington · 6 years

Text

14 Healthier Ways to Spend Black Friday

Yet, there are other ways to connect to that feeling of unification. There are other ways to celebrate. We can form new rituals that don’t revolve around the acquisition of material goods.

Like what? What could a “Primal Friday” look like?

1. Sleep In

Seriously. You know you want to. Imagine how much better you’ll feel than the folks who dragged themselves out of bed at 4:00 a.m. Sleep is the absolute best.

2. Volunteer Your Time and Resources

3. Work With Your Hands

4. Take In a Cultural Event

Skip the throngs at the mall and head for the concert hall, local theater, or community center. Expand your horizons, and enjoy a communal atmosphere without the stampede.

5. Make a Day for Reminiscing (and Record the Occasion For Future Enjoyment)

6. Invite the Neighbors For a Casual Open House

7. Play In the Leaves

8. Rake the Leaves

9. Do a Cold Plunge or Cold Shower

Exposing your body to cold water is a reset button on just about everything. It also boosts immune function and mood.

10. Train Outside

11. Seek Out the Light-Hearted

12. Prep Your Leftovers

13. Go On an Outdoor Pilgrimage

14. Finally, Drink Up Every Bit of Leisure

Thanks for reading today, everybody. On Friday, the Worker Bees will be showing how they’re spending their Black Friday Primal-style. Be sure to stop by, and have a great holiday week.

Want to make fat loss easier? Try the Definitive Guide for Troubleshooting Weight Loss for free here.

The post 14 Healthier Ways to Spend Black Friday appeared first on Mark's Daily Apple.

Article source here:Marks’s Daily Apple

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mycreativename · 7 years

Text

2025 I’ll reevaluate. 7 years from when I leave. I am at least confident in my ability to commit to something for 7 years, but if I do make a drastic change of plans before 2025, it’ll be because I’ve grown in my ability to let go of things when I realize I’m on the wrong path.

there’s a very deeply rooted part of me that’s absurdly and unironically ambitious, and another that doesn’t believe I’m capable of anything I set out to do. they’ve coexisted for a very long time and I don’t know which one is stronger.

but their interaction is an increasingly frequent theme of my internal monologues. what do I think I’m going to do, outlast the competition? has that ever worked for me before? I wouldn’t need to have very low self esteem at all to think that my proposed line of work is a long shot at best, so why spend my life working for it? especially when there’s no way I’ll get anywhere, because I don’t work for it, and all I’ll ever do is talk about the distant future while my life accelerates out from under me and my parents are crazy enough to let me live off of them while I work an unrelated job that never quite leaves me enough time to pursue all the things I said I would

in 2025 it seems way more likely that I’ll be either in the exact same place I am now, comfortable but having to justify all my life choices every time I catch up with someone, or barely getting by in every way in a postage stamp apartment with people I don’t care about, putting whiskey in my Sunday morning coffee while I yell at the traffic for waking me up

neither of those is appealing but there are moments when either one or the other feels inevitable. I always have an unattainable goal. it’s the only way I know how to live. and sooner or later there will come a day when this one hits the fan

so I brace myself before I even start. I focus on the achievable things I’m sure to learn along the way. I take better care of myself, I learn to cook more, I’m more deliberate about what I wear, I learn Spanish, I make good playlists for sitting in traffic, I keep earlier hours. I do everything except write. to be honest, sometimes, maybe even most of the time, I hate writing. maybe it’s because school killed it for me, maybe it’s because I don’t have anything keeping me accountable anymore. there are times when I still love it, yes - starting a new project, finishing it up, that point where the notes finally come together enough that you realize it really is going to sound good, when a better alternative for a mediocre theme seems to come at you out of thin air… maybe the reason I think I hate it is because I don’t remember what it was like for it to be a major part of my life. maybe sometime between now and 2025, I’ll remember why I started.

I’m trying to learn how to be encouraged by the uncertainty. to let the fact that I have no idea what’s coming excite me, not lead me to stagnate. there’s a million other paths I could discover on the way that could become my new plan A. I could find a niche market I’ve never heard of where my skill set and interests pay the bills. I could work hard for seven more years and not end up where I wanted to, but ten years later that work could be essential to something completely different, and I’ll never feel like I have to justify wasting one more chunk of my life. 40 years from now I could be sitting in an LA beach house referencing this post in the liner notes of an original soundtrack telepathic download, I could be working minimum wage flying tourists in a hovercraft to Silmarillion film locations in New Zealand, I could be working at a church writing music for the choir to sing to commemorate the end of a second civil war, I could be retiring from a marketing job with a family and grandchildren, I could be dead and my cousins’ grandchildren could be sitting around talking about everything but my artistic endeavors.

in any case, staying connected to God and a strong Christian community will be the most important thing. not getting stuck in my mindset is another. the world is too big and too complicated for me to resign myself.

but I’ll probably have a whole new perspective in 2025

#britta posts stuff

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