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blackpinkofficial · 4 years

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[TRANS] 200521 Lisa’s Full Interview for Allure Korea’s June 2020

Translation by: lalisamanoban54

Interviewer: Is your memory good? Lisa: Yes, I usually remember even the smallest things.

Interviewer: Remembering something requires a lot of your 5 senses. What do you think you use the most? Lisa: I think I remember things that I see the best. If I smell or hear something, it feels real and vivid then, but I forget it quickly.

Interviewer: We met during the unbearably hot summer in 2018 and the lukewarm winter in 2019. We meet again going through 2020 where summer and spring have blended together. Do you remember that day? Lisa: Yes, I remember both days. Specifically, in the summer, I met you with Rosé in a 2-story house with broken air-conditioning. I remember it being really hot. It isn't a bad memory, though. I remember it as a happy and fun memory, probably because I wasn't alone.

Interviewer: I looked at that day's conversation again. Although we were joking and laughing about it then, there are a lot of things that came true afterwards. Almost like the genie's magic lamp in Aladdin. How about now? Do you still wish for things? Lisa: I heard that you shouldn't make wishes on insignificant things. I believe you need to save up before wishing for a really important one, so I always wait until something really important. I especially wish for no mistakes and for everyone to be safe before going on stage.

Interviewer: You still have your film camera. The last one I saw was the Contax T2, what is this? Lisa: I’m still in love with the charm of the Contax camera. The camera I brought today is the T3 model that I bought recently. I like all the results (photographs).

Interviewer: You said you like taking pictures of people more than scenery. You published a photobook with pictures of your member’s faces and your own. Lisa: Since we spend a lot of time together, I naturally took more pictures of them. Whenever we went on tour or had a schedule, I would take pictures to remember that day. When I looked at my gallery, I had quite a few.

Interviewer: When choosing pictures, the ‘selecting’ process is quite important. What is your standard for choosing photos? Lisa: I think I look at the overall mood. I like pictures that capture the natural vibe of the moment. All of the photos in my photobook are all pictures that I like, so I can’t choose just one.

Interviewer: It's been a little over a year since your Coachella performance. It seems you still remember that day very vividly; is this true? Lisa: That stage was like a dream. We practice hard for every stage, but I remember preparing and practicing for Coachella a lot. I was really nervous before we went on stage, but I felt happy once I was. It's an event I can never forget.

Interviewer: You’re currently taking a break from touring and performing on stages in the world. Lisa: It’s for everyone’s health and safety, so we can’t do anything. I am also staying safe and being careful. I’m sad that I am unable to meet my fans face to face. We are working hard so we can show off our best when we get the chance (to see them again).

Interviewer: How do you feel staying at home after a long period of time outside? Lisa: Last year, I was barely able to stay at home. I wasn’t able to see my lovely cats Leo, Luca and Lily, often, so they were pretty mad at me. So, they stick to my side like gum nowadays. It makes me really happy.

Interviewer: How about your family in Bangkok? Do you miss them? Lisa: There are times where I miss them, since it is hard to see family right now. I video call them often to check up on them.

Interviewer: Is your favorite food still red chicken curry? Lisa: Of course! It is still my favorite Thai food. But I have been liking Chinese food recently as well. Especially fried egg pancake and fried huājuǎn (a kind of bun).

Interviewer: When I think of you, I think of a person who smiles brightly, is kind, and a free soul. I heard that you were born this way. The traits you are born with don’t change easily, right? Lisa: That’s true. On top of that, I enjoy my job. Many people love me for who I am, so I am really happy working. I also love myself. I want to keep my bubbly personality this way until I die.

Interviewer: What do you think about your influence? There must be many people in the world who look up to you. Lisa: Everyone looks at me from a different point of view, but I just want to have a positive influence on everyone. A person who gives you strength all the time.

Interviewer: Can you give us a little hint about Blackpink's new album? Everyone has waited for such a long time. Lisa: I can't tell you yet because it's still a secret. I'm really sorry. (Laughter) We're working on It hard so we can show off our best, so please wait a little bit more.

Interviewer: There’s a lot of process and work that goes into making an album. Blackpink also seem to release perfect works of art with no mistakes. Lisa: Like you said, every element of each album is very important. Each part has to mesh well together and also needs to be perfect. We can’t slack off on anything. The most important part is pulling everything off and expressing it well. Perfectly.

Interviewer: What is the thing you love most right now? It doesn’t matter what. Lisa: My family always comes first. I love them the most. I haven’t seen them in a long time, so I do miss them a lot. Also, my cats. (Laughter)

Interviewer: You said you use your wishes sparingly, but I am still curious. What is your wish right now? Lisa: I want to meet my fans as soon as possible. I want to repay them with amazing performances that will make the long wait worth it. That is my actual, biggest wish.

Interviewer: How about meeting again in 2021? I hope it’s a breezy fall then. Lisa: Okay! Then we will have met in all four seasons. (Laughter) I’ll be waiting.

#lisa #blackpink #m:allure #interview #trans #200521

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things-we-used-tc-share · 5 years

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Sander’s Sides Masterlist

One Shots

Thomas:

Labyrinth: Thomas must journey to the center of the Labyrinth in his mind, and face the beast.

there's an art to falling apart: Four sides, one soul, as they fight to stay in their roles they begin to forget they are more than that, causing a struggle that could have possibly disastrous consequences.

Analogical:

The Closest Thing: Logan teaches Virgil about coping with Anxiety

Stardust: Logan and Virgil hang out together a lot, but this is the first time they’ve actually had a conversation

Touch: Virgil is anxious that he hasn’t seen Logan in a few days, what he finds is not what he expects

Cigarettes and Plants: Virgil meets a guy who baffles him completely, so of course he takes him home.

Sparks: Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them AU, Logan has a fascination for magical creatures, but when he takes in a small and frightened creature he realizes this is not a creature at all, but the victim of a blood curse.

Sing To Me: Virgil discovers that Logan plays the piano, and has the most astounding singing voice. Platonic!Analogical

Flawless: Virgil’s parents couldn’t love him if they tried, forced into a life he never wanted, he draws all the money out of his bank account, quits his job and starts his farewell tour of the earth. Ending in Amsterdam, NL, he meets a young professor whose inability to experience emotions entices him to no end. But what starts out as some quick fun and short-lived euphoria becomes a game changer in whether or not he sees through the end of his plans to end his life here, in the most beautiful city he’s ever experienced.

There’s no logic in your sadness: Virgil hates the hours between midnight and 2AM, this is exactly why.

Origins: Ever since Patton had been created, he’d sworn no-one would face the fear and loneliness he had. Which is fine until two boys appear to be making that job as difficult as possible.

Take my hands (I need to feel): Autistic!Virgil Virgil is most comfortable with Logan, he understands more so than others.

My lungs: Virgil knows exactly what he’s getting into, that doesn’t stop him falling in love anyway.

Rose Petals: When Patton was a baby he was replaced by a paler, grey-eyed version of himself. His mother fought to get him back. Years later Patton, his less than Human brother Logan, and their eccentric friend Roman begin a new chapter of their lives. Along the way, Logan learns that perhaps he is more human than he thought.

I Feel in love (With his mind): Virgil always has the same answer when people ask him why he fell in love with Logan, today he gives in and expands

I Will Leave a Light On: It’s been a long road for Logan, but he’s finally where he needs to be (Heavy topics discussed, Viewer discretion advised, discussions of addiction and drug use)

On the topic of love: (QPR!Analogical) Virgil loves Logan, and Logan loves Virgil, but romance doesn’t particularly fascinate either of them.

when the party’s over: Virgil’s had a good night, but coming home to his best friend crying will really sober a guy up (Ace!Logan)

Love so soft (My heart is made of feathers): Just sheer fluff

Fall: Virgil could fall in love with Logan again and again. Platonically speaking that is. (QPR!Analogical) (Aro!Logan) (AroaceVirgil).

lovely: after two old friends go through bad breakups, they meet by chance in a cafe. (pre-romantic!Analogical)

Reincarnate: At the beginning of time, souls were created tied to each other, Fate pulls the strings, people fall in love (Royality, Analogical)

Tell me about the rain: fluff w/o plot, Analogical cuddle time

Which of Your Lives is This?: Sometimes Logan gets a flash of something he lived, but not in this body, not in these bones, somehow Virgil Sanders knows this.

Tear me Open (Tell me what's inside): Logan has things he needs to say to Virgil, no matter how much he wishes to keep them inside, and Virgil always has time for his best friend.

Logince:

Beds: Roman and Logan are very stubborn, so who is sleeping on the floor tonight?

Dare Me: Roman and Logan have always been very competitive when it comes to dares.

You look like a movie: Successful movie director Logan Sanders runs into successful actor Roman Prince at an awards ceremony, it’s not the first time they’ve met and may not be the last, either.

Serendipity: Logan has never believed in love until he meets a man called fate who shows him that sometimes our lives have already been determined.

If It Means A Lot To You: Roman’s learned to accept that some people are different, so has Logan.

And Then There Were Five: What they hadn’t expected from what could be marriage, was the chance to create new life

Summer Rain: Logan runs into a young man that loves to interrupt his reading time, against his will he’s managed to make a friend, but over time there may be more there.

I hope you stay: Roman and Logan have been friends for a very long, longer than most people keep friends for. Logan sometimes feels he can’t keep up with Roman, but perhaps the reality is Roman can’t keep up with Logan.

Honesty: Most days Roman wants to shout at Logan, other times he just can’t stop staring at his lips.

greater: Despite everything that Logan had disliked about Roman, he always took the chance to make things a little greater (Including himself) (song!fic: come out and play by Billie Eilish)

Something Wild: Logan has been in a bit of a rut until he runs into a childhood friend and remembers what home feels like.

Scars: The first time Logan sees his chest, he cries for the first time in years (Trans!Logan).

It took me by surprise: Perhaps Roman really has pushed Logan too far this time

Souls in glass houses: Logan had forgotten a time where this might’ve scared him, Roman had forgotten a time where his heart was broken.

The Seance: Most people find their powers when they are children, Logan didn’t know his until his brother died.

Blue and Red: Logan, a Vampire, meets the High Warlock of the city, Roman, who is not exactly what Logan was expecting (background Moxiety)

The stars look beautiful (and so do you): Roman tries not to notice the way Logan jumps every time a door closes, but he knows his old friend is hiding something. He starts to doubt he’s ever going to get back the boy he’d known.

Cigarettes in July: Roman remembers the first time he fell in love like it was yesterday, and nobody forgets their first love.

Are you still having fun: Logan is a singer that keeps dropping back into his ex's life, and Roman is quite tired of being a pit stop.

All the king's men: After his father's death Prince Roman, now alone and destined to run a kingdom, runs away to seek some solace. In the woods he finds three strange young men who call themselves Witches (Also Analogicality)

dreams that live in small spaces: Roman and Logan settle down and adopt a child

Moxiety:

(+Logic) Breathe: Virgil has a nightmare and his boyfriends try to keep him calm

Butterfly Kisses: Ace!Patton, some kinds of love are just much more comfortable for Patton.

Conditions: Virgil turns into a vampire when he’s angry, Deceit uses this against him, and in the process, Patton gets hurt.

You are my safety: Virgil never feels safe, he just doesn’t, it’s not written in his DNA. Except for with one person.

I’ll Hide My Chest: No-one’s seen Virgil in a couple of days now, which means it’s his bad days. (Platonic!Moxiety)

Lightning Scars: It took a while for Virgil to be comfortable with how he looks.

I’ve Pinned Each and Every Hope on You: Moxiety cuddles drabble

idontwannabeyouanymore: Virgil’s tired of seeing the same thing in the mirror, he’s tired of himself. (Platonic!moxiety)

Candy Bags of Lollipops: Patton is 19 years old, a university student, he loves kids, but he never really thought this day would come. Desperate to save his sister’s child from being put in the care system, or worse, with their parents, he takes her on into his life and watches as his entire world flips upside down.

Sandman: He’s watched this man for a long time now, lonely, tired and cold, and it’s not as though Roman usually takes pity on the many men whose dreams he spins, but this one…needs someone, so he employs the help of a friend. (Sandman! Roman) (Fate! Logan)

Wasteland, Baby!: For Virgil, falling in love feels like the apocalypse.

Royality:

4 Times Patton Miscalculated, and 1 Time he Got it Right: Roman is not shy, he’s very vocal about his feelings for Patton, Patton however, is clueless.

Haunting: Patton is a ghost, Logan moves into his house.

Songs and Sketches: Patton can hear Roman singing through the walls, he thinks this might be why he fell in love.

Novels: Roman has always loved Patton, and he finally tells him, or shows him, rather.

Boys Your Age: Patton meets a boy in his class that could not care about anyone but himself. And Patton, he’s definitely interested in Patton. Trans!Patton

Flowers In Autumn: Patton loves flowers, he loves to sit among them, in Autumn he sits in the death of nature and says a prayer goodbye to the dying plants, this time nature responds. Earth Fairy!Roman and Witch!Patton

bloom: Patton does something unusual when he’s happy. He…blooms.

flower petals: Roman and Patton are getting married, and it gives Logan and Virgil something to think about.

It was always you: Roman and Patton had been friends for most of their lives, and always would be.

Summer: The royality sequel to Fall. When Virgil moves across the states to be with his partner, Roman decides to follow, hoping to start a new life. His new life is apparently called Patton.

Logicality:

University: Logan is going to University, Patton is trying his best to be happy

Pronouns: Patton felt the words ‘boy’ and ‘he’ didn’t quite sit right on their chest, so they consult their encyclopedia, otherwise known as Logan, to help them work through it. Agender!Logan Demigirl!Patton.

Left Brain, Right Brain: Platonic!Logicality. Logan and Patton get into a bad fight with each other.

Demons: Logan is the Demon of Lust, Patton is Asexual.

Flowers: Logan works at a flower shop, when his best friend Roman begs him to take on his brother, Patton, Logan reluctantly agrees, but now he’s so glad that he did. (Prinxiety also)

Constellations (You’re a black hole): Patton recalls how and why he fell in love with Logan, unlocking the idea that perhaps he could only fall in love with a man that complicates him.

Heroes and Villains: Prompt: I really want a villain who is a “MCDONALDS! MCDONALDS!” person, facing a hero who is a “one black coffee” person (Also Prinxiety)

They think I’m insane (they think my lover is strange): Patton’s kind of sick and tired of people giving unwanted opinions about Logan.

A Little Love: Logan spent most of his teenage years not knowing how to love. But someone, in the form of a mistake he once made, teaches him how. Four years later that lesson is still continuing, in a completely different way.

I just wanna set the world on fire: In a post-apocalyptic world, two brothers make strange acquaintances, one must live with the knowledge that one day his lover will no longer know or recognize him.

One Night (For a Whole Year): Patton has a one night stand the one night his son goes to his mother’s house. Turns out he slept with his son’s tutor for the next year. NSFW Version here.

Souls: Logan and Patton have been fighting and it will take more than just kind words to fix it.

Descended: Patton must be descended from something magical, Logan decides, three minutes before he falls in love.

Butterfly Boy: Patton has a gift that came at a price, it cost him his voice. Logan was born with hearing damage, which cost him a loving family; but now he might have the chance to make his own.

Drunk: Logan’s never drank alcohol before, it’s not as bad as he thought it would be.

Sad Machine: After the people of Earth migrate in time for the Earth to be fried by radiation, Logan is an android who has been left behind. Hundreds of years later three travelers crash land on the planet of their origin. (Also includes Prinxiety)

all about us: Patton teaches Logan to dance.

My Favourite Colour is You: It's been years of knowing each other, so how is Logan only just noticing how in love with Patton he is?

The Flower Prince: Logan's garden has never really quite taken to growing flowers, which is why it's sort of strange that it's flourished overnight (Faery!Patton)

Holding Hands: Patton has been holding onto a secret for a while now (Asexual!Patton)

flesh and bone: Five years of being hungry, hundreds of bruises up his spine. Nineteen-years-old and the chances of getting older are growing slimmer. In a fit of desperation Patton's mother begs him to go a facility to get the help he needs to recover.

No Time Like the Present: Logan's been harboring romantic feelings for Patton for a while, so when the radio silence is broken on him returning his affections, he doesn't know what to say.

Prinxiety:

Sounds: Virgil has selective mutism due to Anxiety, Patton is always on hand to translate, especially when a certain prince comes on the scene.

I can’t help (Falling In Love With You): Roman didn’t think he’ll ever really tell Virgil how he feels, until now.

Sandwich: from the prompt: “With Hell’s heart, I stab at thee!” Virgil steals Roman’s sandwich, chaos ensues. Platonic!Prinxiety and Dad!Patton

Coffeeshop/famous Roman!AU

Birds: Virgil just wants to be alone today, and Roman is okay with that so he sends him some less human company (Platonic!Prinxiety)

You say things with your mouth, flies and cobwebs come out: Roman Prince finds a startled and quiet boy outside of school, surrounded by three known bullies and employs a rescue mission. He doesn’t quite know what will come or the secrets Virgil is hiding

Let’s Raise a Glass (To all the things I’ve lost on you): Virgil reflects on the relationship he had on Roman and finds despite everything, he doesn’t regret any of it. (Post Romantic/Platonic Prinxiety)

Movement: Roman’s usually first to the theatre in the morning, this time he finds the lead dancer of their production practicing his routine. (Dancer!Virgil)

In The Woods Somewhere: Virgil hears a scream in the woods and goes to follow it (Winter Fae! Roman)

Devil May Care: When Virgil had entered Lux, the new bar that had opened up across town, he hadn’t expected to meet a devilishly handsome man who wished to know his deepest desires. (Lucifer!AU)

Daisies and Lonely Lullabies: Virgil hears singing in the woods, so soft and melancholy. He's a little taken aback once he finds the source (Fae!Roman) (Fae!Patton) (Nonbinary!Patton) (Also contains Logicality)

Love, But on Three Different Roads: Love is never quite the same each time. (Also Royality and Logince)

Said it was the last time, last time: It's not the first time Patton has woken up to find his son has run away again, but it's the time that breaks him (Background Logicality) (Bipolar!Patton) (ADHD!Roman) (Logan is a cop)

I've done this dance a thousand times: Virgil has been dropping hints for a year now, but Roman doesn't seem to be cottoning on (Unsympathetic!Deceit warning) (Roceit and Logicality also)

Strawberries and Cigarettes: They've been friends for a long time, and if Roman can commit to anyone it's going to be Virgil.

LAMP:

Learn: Patton is an English Lit Major, Roman is a Drama Major, there’s a kid in his class he really doesn’t like.

Soulmates: In a world where when you write on yourself it appears on your Soulmates body, Patton is trying to figure out why he has three different sets of writing. Sequel: Soulmate

Flirt: Virgil is trying to figure out why he feels different from the other three, then he cottons on just what sort of relationship the others have.

Experiments: Logan conducts a series of experiments to figure out his feelings towards the others.

Ink on my Skin: Soulmate! Au, the first words your soulmate says are written on your skin, Virgil didn’t really count on mishearing one of them.

Just Keep Breathing: Virgil has a panic attack on Christmas morning

Tell Me (Pretty Lies): Logan can’t understand how he got into this situation, or why he never left it until now. Themes of domestic abuse. Platonic!LAMP

Tired (of holding these emotions): Logan!Centric. Logan’s tired of hiding his feelings. Platonic!LAMP

the dark side of your room.: Virgil has nightmares, the others help him out

Dead Inside: Virgil hasn’t slept in days.

Magical Creatures: The four seasons all have their own schedule, in the form of four fae princes.

Studio: Set in 1970s, four artists meet over a series of events, changing their lives for the better.

How easily Passion Twists: They’re getting sick of the way Logan is treating them, so they try to speak his language (Platonic!LAMP)

Susceptible To Damage: Patton has a big heart, he falls in love every day with new people, new faces, new things. There’s too much love in his heart, his mother used to say, it’d get broken. He didn’t think his heart would ever get fixed after a devastating breakup but, fate has a way of changing his mind. (Asexual!Patton) (Asexual!Virgil) (Aromantic!Logan) (Hypersexual!Roman)

Kisses: The anthology of their kisses

Tell me (pretty lies): Logan couldn’t understand why he was in this situation, he couldn’t understand how he got here, but now, bruises on his body and sat in the police station waiting for his best friend to pick him up, he knows he’s going to have to pick up the pieces himself.

Cherry Wine: Patton never thought it’d be easy, but he didn’t think recovering would be this hard (Platonic!LAMP)

Soldier, Poet, King: Patton has a prophecy to fulfil, with a soul that has already seen this world before.

The kid has got a dark side: (school shootings tw) Logan was in the bathroom when he heard the shot, Patton was in Science, Virgil in English and Roman in Drama, when they hear the fire alarm, they know not to run.

Self Care: For someone who is the embodiment of Logic, you would think he knows how to take a self care day, instead his boyfriends are having to show him.

Tongue Tied: With the first year of University over, the four re-count the positive changes in their lives.

Hopeless Wanderer: (Not LAMP but all of the ships separately): Four travelers see the world and meet each other on separate occasions.

Pastel Crowns (and Baseball Bats): Their first Pride together was supposed to be eventful, but they didn't quite think it would be like this.

Game of Survival: (Pre-romantic LAMP) A Demon, an Angel, a Witch and a Faery walk into a bar, chaos ensues.

100 Bad Days: It's been a long road for Roman to get where he is now (Platonic!LAMP)

then we dance: As the summer solstice approaches, Patton, the prince of spring, and Roman, the prince of Summer, await their partner's approach to their revel; Logan, a changeling child and Virgil, a Witch. It just so happens the solstice is also Logan's birthday meaning he can assume his full powers.

Logan/Roman/Patton:

adoration and all it's side effects: Plot: Logan managed to go twenty-two years of his life without ever once even thinking he is falling in love. Until another man moves in with him and he’s so full of sunshine that Logan realizes he always had the capacity to love, he’d just ever acknowledged it before. And then he meets his boyfriend

Analogince:

Sewing Needles: Logan had a rocky upbringing that gave him a few scars, Virgil is getting comfortable in their identity and Roman is just trying to live his best life. (Nonbinary!Virgil) (Trans!Logan)

Remile:

Sleep: Emile is about two seconds away from forcing his fiancee into bed and piling pillows on top of him.

Guiding Light: Remy is struggling to come out to his parents, but bites the bullet with Emile's support, further instilling that, to Emile, Remy is the strongest person he's ever known.

Sleeplogical:

Couldn’t forget if I tried: Whilst the other’s may not be acutely aware of Remy’s existence, Logan has had many a conversation with him. One conversation in particular needs to be addressed.

Come and Fly Away With Me: Have you ever felt so exhausted that you wish you could run away? Logan hadn’t thought so until now.

The Long way around: After the last video Thomas still seems to be struggling to sleep, so Logan employs some outside help (Platonic!Sleeplogical mentioned)

Remxiety:

Dreams: Virgil has trouble sleeping, luckily he has some form of overly-caffeinated guardian angel. (platonic)

Roceit:

Tell me that you love me: Roman’s so sure that no one can love him, to the point he’s sure his boyfriend is lying to his face.

My Boy: Dmitri is always saying he’ll change, Roman is starting to give up on the hope that will ever happen.

A little laughter: Roman hits gay panic when he sees Deceit genuinely laugh for the first time

Anxceit:

Brother: Virgil had thought he'd given his brother enough chances (Brothers!Anxciet)

Logan:

Concepts: Logan does not understand the concept of gender, he draws a conclusion to a hypothesis regarding his own gender. NB!Logan

Tricks: Logan is used to Deceit’s tricks, but even for him, this was too far.

Silence at Dawn: You spend your entire life thinking you can't fall in love for someone to come along and prove you wrong, just to make you wish they hadn't.

Patton

Alone With the Rain: It's one of the bad days, there's always bad days, but that's okay Patton can deal with that.

Deceit:

Unapologetic: Deceit loves his scales

((Edit: So I’m told some people are having trouble with the links on certain accounts, I’m not sure why this is! But if you have desktop, you can go onto my blog and click the “Sanders Sides” tab, it has all of my fics listed there and I’m currently double checking all the links over there, so within the next fifteen minutes (07/08/2019 10:51 BST as I’m writing this)) all of the links on that tab should be available :) I’m sorry that tumblr has done screwed up on that guys, gals and nonbinary pals!))

ko-fi

#sanders sides #thomas sanders #LAMP #Prinxiety #Logicality #lamp/calm #Royality #analogical #Roceit #Anxciet #Logince #Analogince #Logan Sanders #Patton Sanders #Roman Sanders #Virgil Sanders #Deceit Sanders

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always-and-forever-a-killjoy · 4 years

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Good afternoon uhhhh I have no idea what to say about this except that I wrote it and it exists and that probably does say something about me as a person. Also you may want to read my last fic (knight in a beat-up green jacket) because it gets referenced a couple of times but it’s definitely not necessary.

Title: can you catch me when I'm falling down

Wordcount: 2450

Summary: Party Poison is trying to have a calm day for once. Unfortunately, Cherri Cola needs help.

For once, Poison is actually helpful.

Warnings: blood, self harm, mentions of suicide, mentions of death/child death. Please be very careful.

Taglist: @wishiwasthemoon-tonight @sleevesareforlosers @stressed-depressed-emo-mess @tasteofamnesia @dagger-queen (message me, send an ask, or reblog/reply to one of my posts if you want to be added or removed)

AO3 Link

(Actual fic under the cut)

Party Poison was alone when the radio crackled to life. It was an ordinary afternoon in the Zones, Kobra Kid was out on his motorbike somewhere, Jet Star was playing with the Girl, getting ready for her nap, and Fun Ghoul was….exploding things, they assumed. Given the loud bangs from out back, it seemed likely. Poison themself was just trying to read a magazine in peace, feet propped up on one of the diner tables, but that was not to be.

They sighed and reached for the radio. “Hello?”

“Hey,” Cherri Cola’s voice crackled through. He sounded tense, which put them on edge.

“What’s up, Pepsi?”

“Uh, well, you know how that one time, Ghoul said I was like a knight in shining armor? Right, well, I could kind of use a knight in shining armor right now.”

Poison could see that it definitely wasn’t going to be a peaceful afternoon for them. “What the fuck did you get yourself into?”

“Nothing- nothing in particular. I would just really not prefer to be alone at the radio station today, and everyone else is off doing varying things.” His voice had grown even more strained, sounding close to breaking.

“Fuck’s sake, Pepsi.”

“I know, I’m sorry. Trust me, if I could have asked anyone else for help, I wouldn’t have put this on a teenager’s shoulders.”

“Fuck off, I’m perfectly competent.” They sighed. “I’ll be there in twenty.”

“Thank you, Poison.”

Poison swung their feet off the table, pulling their boots and jacket on at the door. “Jet, I’m heading down to the radio station!”

“Okay!” Jet Star called back from the back of the diner. “What for?”

“Cola needs something!”

“Okay! Be safe!”

“I will!” They kicked open the door, shutting it behind them as another explosion sounded from behind the building and Jet shouted something about ‘you woke the Girl up, I just got her to sleep!’. They really had to talk to Ghoul about setting off bombs during naptime. Making a note to do that when they got back, Party climbed into the Trans Am and turned the keys.

“Alright, let’s go see what the fuck he needs, huh, old girl?” The car obediently revved to life, and Poison took them down the roads at frankly irresponsible speed. Not that they had ever given a fuck about being responsible in the first place, not unless it came to their crew’s safety.

Party Poison arrived at the radio shack and kicked the door open with exactly as much grace as they had when kicking the diner door open. “Alright, Pepsi, I’m here!”

“Hey, Poison.” The reply was quiet, and they had to look around further before they located Cherri Cola, sitting on the floor against the sofa. A knife was clutched in his right hand, and they thought they could see blood on his arms, dripping down onto the already stained floor.

“What the fuck? Destroya, Cola!”

Cherri’s eyes were shut tight. “I’m sorry. Please take the knife before I end up doing something stupid.”

“Stupider than this?”

“Stupider as in cutting my fucking throat, Poison.”

“Fuck.” They hurried across the room to wrestle the knife out of his hand, wishing they had made Jet come with them. Jet was actually good at this kind of thing. Thank the Witch, Cherri let go of the knife fairly easily- Poison was pretty sure he would have been able to keep a hold of it if he really tried. They folded the blade away and quickly tucked it into their jacket pocket, wondering if they should bother to check him for other weapons. “Do you have any more knives?”

Cola shook his head, and Poison settled next to him.

“Okay, so why do you want to slit your fucking throat?”

He shrugged.

“I don’t know what that means.”

Cherri mumbled something they strained to catch.

“What?”

“Just happens sometimes,” he repeated, a little louder.

“Just wake up and want to die?” The feeling was strangely (and sadly) familiar.

“Yeah. I’ve seen a lot of shit, Pois. Killed a lot of people. I know I act like I’m well-adjusted, but I’ve never been well-adjusted.”

They bristled a little at the nickname, but now wasn’t exactly the time to say anything about it. “We’ve all killed a lot of people, Cola.”

He shrugged a second time. “I guess it gets to me more than you guys.”

Silence settled over the two killjoys for a few moments before Cherri broke it again.

“I knew an exterminator, you know.”

“What?”

“Before the war. She was good at origami, and she liked soda, but only if it was cherry flavored, and chewed bubblegum whenever possible. She had a ring she never took off, our grandma gave it to her. Her eyes were clear blue like the sky.”

“So you knew an exterminator.”

“And I killed her.” Cherri’s voice was very straightforward. “I killed her, not because I wanted to, but because we were on opposite sides and I had no choice.”

“Fuck,” They swore. “That’s rough.”

“Yeah. It’s a truth I learned pretty young: people die in war. Not for any reason, not because they’re bad people or because they deserved to die. Simply because they were there. Because they were forced into fighting, because they were in the wrong place at the wrong time, because they were trying to make the world a better place. People die because they’re trying to save their friends or their love. Because they want to make the world better for their children. And those children die too, because they’re children in the wrong place at the wrong time. Because they can’t defend themselves.” His voice was shaking, nails digging into his arms.

Poison swore under their breath and pulled his hands away to reveal another set of crescent marks, adding to the many already there. “Fuck’s sake. Maybe we shouldn’t talk about this.”

“I’m open to other suggestions,” Cherri muttered.

They almost snorted. “Well, Cola, pleased to announce you’re going to be just fine, seeing as you’re being a snarky bastard again.”

That got a tiny laugh out of him. “Am I ever not a snarky bastard, in your opinion?”

“When-“ Poison hesitated briefly. “When shit really hits the fan, you’re not. So when you’re being snarky, I know shit’s going to be fine.”

“I wouldn’t use me as an indicator.”

“Eh, you’re a decent one. Canary in a coal mine and all that. I think canaries are a brighter yellow than you, though. Probably better fashion sense, too.” They hardly knew what they were saying, only that they had to find something to talk about.

Cherri gave them a glare for their trouble, if not a very harsh one. “Now you’re the one being a snarky bastard.”

“Uh-huh, but where’s the fun in not being one? Plus, my brilliant plan worked.” Party shot him a small smile. “I’ve distracted you.”

Cherri looked exhausted as he leaned back a bit further, running his hands along his bloody arms, but he was giving them a tired smile. “Sure did.”

“See, I’m a genius.” They climbed to their feet and offered him a hand up, trying to think of what Jet would say. “Let’s get you cleaned up, hey?”

“’kay.”

His hands were bloody and rough, the blood sticking to Poison’s own hands as they pulled him to his feet, but they didn’t say anything about it. Instead, they led him over to the sink of the radio station so they could pour some precious water over his arms, sluicing them clean. They cleaned out the deeper scratches with some sort of foul-smelling disinfectant from the radio shack’s first aid kit and bandaged them up, chattering the entire time.

It was meaningless stuff, rambles about Ghoul blowing shit up during naptime and Kobra’s latest antics on the racetrack, but it was a way to fill the silence, which seemed almost crushing. So Poison unleashed all of it, every update about the Girl and her lessons (“-and Jet has her painting beads!”), every random story they hadn’t told him (“-so that was how we almost ended up with no car and a bucket filled with slime-“) and a few they had (“-then Kobra, dumbass that he is, says ‘it will be fine if I touch these wires!’”).

All their efforts were rewarded by another small, fragile smile from Cola, just barely reaching his sea-blue eyes. It was tiny, but it was real, and Poison had never been so grateful for the endless amount of stupid shit their friends got up to.

They stuck on a final band-aid and closed the kit, glancing over at him as they tucked it away. “So I’m assuming it wouldn’t be cool of me to just abandon you.”

“Not really, no.”

Poison tried to pretend the shakiness of his voice didn’t affect them at all. “So do you want me to stay here until the rest get back? Or should I bring you on over to the diner so the chaos crew can dogpile you into a good afternoon?”

“You’re part of the chaos crew, I hope you know that.” Cherri fiddled with some of the bandages and Poison pulled his hand away. “D’s at his safehouse in Zone 2, he was worried about Better Living tracing the signal back here. Pony went with him, Newsie’s out somewhere and I don’t know if she’s coming back tonight or tomorrow.”

“Alright, lets go back to the diner, then. You can stay a night, you’re not that insufferable.” They tried to sound like they really didn’t care. “Kobes will be happy about it, at least.”

“Thank you, Party.”

“Of course, Pepsi.”

It felt weird to be in a car with Cola and be the one driving- most often when they were stuck together, Cola was giving them a ride or they were on a run together using Cola’s truck. But now, Poison was sitting in their usual spot in the Trans Am, and Cherri had climbed into shotgun. Mad Gear was what was blaring from their speakers as they blazed across the desert, knowing Cherri could handle whatever speed they drove. Indeed, he seemed unbothered, staring quietly out the window. Poison mostly ignored him, glancing over occasionally to see if he was okay.

When they pulled up to the diner, it appeared that Ghoul was still testing out explosives (or possibly fireworks), given the bangs from behind. Cherri flinched at each one, and Poison stuck their head around the back.

“Ghoul! Asshole! Stop it!”

“Why?”

“The Girl’s trying to sleep!”

“Ah fuck, sorry, Pois.” Xe pushed xyr hair out of his face as xe came around the side of the diner. “Oh hey, Cola!”

“Hey, Ghoul.”

Poison shot Ghoul a warning glare as he opened his mouth again, and xe quickly shut it. “Cola’s going to be staying with us this afternoon, maybe tonight too.”

“Alright. Any particular reason?”

They almost groaned. Ghoul somehow always had awful timing. “Uh. You know. He gets lonely when everyone abandons him at the radio station.” It was a terrible lie, but Cherri shot them a grateful smile that almost made Ghoul’s skeptical look worth it.

Thank the Witch, xe was smart enough not to question further. “Okay. Guess we’re heading in, then, if I can’t explode shit?”

Poison nodded to them and led the others inside, looking around. It appeared Kobra had arrived back while they were gone, given that he was lounging in Poison’s usual seat, reading the magazine they had set down. Poison spared a moment to flip him off before peeking into the back to find Jet. They were sitting in his and Poison’s bedroom, humming gently under their breath as the Girl snoozed next to them.

“Hey, Jet.”

Jet looked up, putting a finger to their lips in a shh as they spoke very quietly. “Hey, Pois. Back from the radio station?”

“Yeah.”

“What did Cola need?”

“Long story.” They glanced back at the door to make sure that the rest of the Four (plus Cherri) were still in the main room of the diner before deciding how much to reveal to Jet. “He needed me to make sure he didn’t do anything dumb.”

That was all they needed to say for the other to understand. “Is he okay?”

“He’s fine, but he has to stay with us today.”

“For the same reason?”

“Wasn’t a smart idea to leave him back at the station alone.”

Jet nodded. “Did you leave him with Kobra and Ghoul?”

“Fuck, I did. I’m…sure he kept them from getting in trouble.”

Jet and Poison wandered back out to find Kobra laying across the table, calling commentary across the room as Ghoul attempted to get some of the power pup off one of the highest shelves and Cherri watched with great concern.

“This is why we can’t leave you alone,” Jet sighed. “Hi, Cherri.”

“Hey, Jet. Uh, Ghoul decided xe should make dinner, I guess.”

“It’s almost dinnertime anyways! I’m making fancy shit!”

Jet rolled their eyes, but they were smiling as Poison turned to Kobra. “And what are you doing, fuckface?”

“Talking to Cola, bastard.”

“We’re siblings, you idiot, if I’m a bastard then so are you.”

Kobra flipped them off most eloquently, and Poison just laughed as they turned to Cola. “These idiots driving you crazy?”

“No, I love them.”

“Bad taste.” They laughed at Ghoul’s face. “I’m kidding, you’re the best crew. Now everyone shut up, I have to show Cola my rendition of Toxic.”

“The Girl is napping!”

Cherri laughed quietly. “Thank you, kids.”

“Sure thing!”

“We’re not kids!”

“Of course, we love you.”

“Yeah, love you, Pepsi!”

Cherri Cola stayed with them once again, this time in the graffiti-covered diner. He ate dinner with them, and the Girl sat in his lap quite happily. Ghoul and Party cracked stupid jokes back and forth until his smile wasn’t quite so fragile, trading stories about dumb shit they’d done even though half of those stories involved each other. Jet gave him a big hug, and Kobra sat down to talk with him after dinner, until finally everyone was settling down for the night. Ghoul half-jokingly suggested he sleep in one of the booths, and Cherri laughed and said he was a little old for that but ended up curled in the old chair they had salvaged a few months back anyways. Poison made sure he was safely asleep before they went to bed themself, and they were there from the moment he radioed to the moment they dropped him back off at the radio shack to a yawning Newsie who had driven through the night to get back home.

#cherri cola #party poison #ttlofk #auri writes #danger days #self harm tw #ask to tag #be careful y'all #the fabulous four

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sophiehotch · 4 years

Photo

PORTRAITS OF CONGRESS: CHARLIE KEETING (NY-10) BY SOPHIA HOTCHNER - AUGUST 11, 2020 - THE WASHINGTON POST

When I sat down with Representative Charlie Keeting - an environmental activist and the current NY-10 Representative, there was an immediate sense of warmth. Maybe that had to do with the fact that the bustling-yet-quiet walls of the cafe they had chosen to meet in was a beautiful shade of corals and yellows, or maybe it had to do with the Representative’s dedication to making sure I was comfortable, but there’s no denying that Charlie Keeting has a warm heart beating in his chest.

I met Charlie Keeting (who uses they/them and he/him pronouns interchangeably) back at the beginning of the year when I had the opportunity to collect information on current Democratic activists, of which Charlie had made the list. Their activism in trans health and trans safety (they’re agender themselves), their work with LGBTQ+ youth within their district and beyond, and their unflinching stance on climate change have made them a bright young face in Washington - one many kids and young adults can see themselves in. On top of that, their eclectic style and infectious laughter certainly made me feel right at home within our small world of interviews.

We order before we get started, Representative Keeting settling on a Mediterranean Salad - “Vegan,” they say, “I’m working on it, but it’s not always feasible for everyone, and that’s okay,” - and then we begin our conversation about what it means to be a leader in congress at an age so young, what’s next for the New York Representative, and the upcoming elections.

SOPHIA HOTCHNER: So, Representative, tell us a little about yourself - where you grew up, what your life was like at a young age?

REP. KEETING: I grew up in a small suburb in north New York - Rochester, to be exact. I was more than fortunate enough to be able to grow up in a household that was extremely LGBTQ+ friendly, and despite being a child of divorce, really lovely. My mom came out when I was six. She told my dad she had met someone else and we just kind of moved on from there. My upbringing was... a bit abnormal to say the least for two reasons: one, my dad and mom remained best friends (which I know doesn’t always happen in divorces), and two, my dad was halfway across the country. Regardless, my parents were more than supportive of everything I did, and Rochester might have been a small town, but it has a lovely queer community within it.

SOPHIA HOTCHNER: It’s really great that you had such a supportive community at such a young age.

REP. KEETING: Honestly, I’m thankful for it every day. Growing up being encouraged to explore myself, my interests, and my identity is definitely one of the reasons I feel so comfortable today.

SOPHIA HOTCHNER: Has DC and the world of politics changed that at all?

REP. KEETING: I certainly don’t always have the freedoms that I’d like to have in regards to how I’d like to dress. Regulations on the hill for what constitutes as formal are still extremely gendered. It’ll be something I work on if I get the chance to return to the Capitol in the winter.

SOPHIA HOTCHNER: Yes, you’re up for re-election, correct?

REP. KEETING: I am indeed.

SOPHIA HOTCHNER: How are you feeling about the campaign?

REP. KEETING: I’m feeling pretty good. If the citizens of New York City want me in office, they’ll put me there, you know? If that’s not what they want, I’ll surely be doing this work in other capacities. I’ve been in and around Washington since 2012 doing different sorts of climate and political work, so I’m pretty confident that I won’t be leaving the city or the realm of politics anytime soon.

SOPHIA HOTCHNER: You did work for different politicians before you were elected office, correct? Writing grants and doing climate crisis research?

REP. KEETING: Yes, I used to be knee deep in grant-writing on any given day in the first few years i spent here. I don’t think I miss it completely, but I do miss some of it sometimes.

SOPHIA HOTCHNER: Did you always know you wanted to go into politics eventually? Or was it just a natural next step?

REP. KEETING: I can confidently say the younger version of me had no idea they were going to end up in politics. I didn’t really know what I wanted to do, but my parents have always been supportive no matter what I attempted to make of my life. I knew from a young age I was heavily interested in science and the arts, so I figured I’d end up doing something in those categories. I still kind of do, and I still paint and create art displays and curate galleries when I can, but that’s definitely taken a back seat to the science side of my interests, which have turned very political with the climate crisis. It was definitely more of a natural next step to slide into office.

SOPHIA HOTCHNER: Sometimes things just fall into place, don’t they?

REP. KEETING: It certainly feels like it. My degree was like that too. So many people ask me why I double majored in Climate Science and Art History, but it just felt right. Moral of the story? Pursue your interests as much as you can. Hobbies, career options, whatever they are. Pursue it. Nothing is too small to care about.

SOPHIA HOTCHNER: That’s good advice. I know younger me would have loved to hear that more. On the topic of your schooling and on the climate crisis - you’re nearing the completion of your PhD, yes? How has your schooling and your continuing education informed your stance on certain topics?

REP. KEETING: Since I had the opportunity to complete my masters degree in Climate & Society, I was able to put a lot of that work to use right away because it was a partially practical degree. I ended up working for a couple of environmental firms here in DC, working with politicians to help implement eco-friendly laws, but also tangible laws. I’d say that’s the biggest way my education has helped impact my stance -- in a much more actionable way. Studying both sides of it allowed me to see the changes that needed to be made from the science side of it, but also taught me the best way to explore how things can be implemented in a manageable and realistic way.

SOPHIA HOTCHNER: At the same time, you’ve been a large inspiration for a lot of young activists, both within Climate Activism as well as in the LGBTQ+ Community - what are your thoughts on that? Do you have any words of wisdom for your followers?

REP. KEETING: As much as it’s an honor to be seen as an inspiration, I’m not the first and I’m certainly not the last to fight for what I’m fighting for. I’m just one person who was elected into office to help do the work from a legislative perspective. Connect with your local communities, find workplaces and grassroots communities that stand for what you believe in. I didn’t start in politics, after all - I started there, and it most certainly shaped who I am today. And - as cheesy as it is - follow your heart. As long as you love what you do, you’ll never be really bored a day in your life. Frustrated? Maybe. But never bored.

SOPHIA HOTCHNER: On that note of inspiration and firsts, this is your first term in congress, and you’re only 34. How has being a young activist in Congress shaped your experience?

REP. KEETING: I wish it wasn’t true, but people do tend to take me less seriously. What part of lack of respect that falls under is up for debate, but I do think my age definitely comes into play. It’s easy to claim seniority and push that ‘seasoned minds know best’, but I don’t think that’s true. I think what it really comes down to is how dedicated you are to your work, no matter your age. At the same time, being a young representative in Congress has allowed me to connect with a demographic of young voters that has felt consistently under-heard from the older members of the administration. By no means do I want to be a spokesperson, and I’m certainly not going to be young forever, but I think my age has helped me form an immediate connection with a lot of younger individuals who are maybe voting for the first time, or voting for the third or fourth time, who want to see their ideas moving into congress.

SOPHIA HOTCHNER: Do you have any plans for last minute moves in the House before your re-election? Or will you be waiting for a hopeful new term to bring forward any movements or bills to the table?

REP. KEETING: A combination of both. I know there’s always the chance that I might not get another term in office, so I definitely have a few more things up my sleeve before the elections potentially take that chance. But I can confidently say that if I’m able to take up office again in January, rest assured I won’t be playing nice. I’ve got a lot I want to do, and a team behind me ready to help me make it happen.

SOPHIA HOTCHNER: Last question, for the sake of the fact that I kind of have to - you’ve vocalized your support for the Democratic Candidates, correct? How do you see the landscape of Capitol Hill changing depending on who takes office?

REP. KEETING: I most certainly have. I’m a vocal supporter of Berkeley-Zafar, and I’ll continue to be so. I’m not sure exactly how my job will change after the elections quite yet, but definitely the majority in the house will shape how much I’ll be able to get done next term, considering most of my politics aren’t quite… in line with most of the GOP’s. But we’ll cross that bridge when we get to it. We still have some time left on the campaign trail, and I’ll be excited to see how it all plays out, that’s for sure.

I thanked Representative Keeting for sitting down for lunch with me as we wrap up, talking more casually about the meal and they ask me how everything’s going at the Post. It’s small conversations like this that make it easy to see why the Representative is only projecting upward. Their interest in community building and cross-disciplinary studies make them a strong candidate for politics, despite not growing up rooted in politics. They care and are passionate about their work, and it’s easy to feel that through the few conversations I’ve had with them. I’m positive others who have interacted with Representative Keeting know exactly what I’m talking about.

Representative Keeting is currently running for re-election within the 10th District of New York State (Manhattan) and you can find their platform located on their website. Make sure you’re registered to vote, and get out to the polls this November!

#tags broken but yknow i'll tag this later #this is so long sorry y'all

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daely-trans-life · 4 years

Text

Thoughts on gender and other matters (letter to a friend)

Dearest [Friend],

I finally got around to writing this email, god knows it's long overdue.

You've asked me to explain what lead me to the realisation that I might be transgender and well, that's a larger subject than what I can summarise in a text message (in fact this email might turn into a novel, in which case I'm very sorry), so here we go.

I can see how from an outside point of view it might come as a surprise, albeit for me this realisation is something that's been long in the making... Probably ever since I became aware of the concept of gender itself.

To begin with, I need to explain a little bit about the culture I was raised in, because it ties into the delay significantly. It has to do with the societal expectations as much as the language... Hungarian has no gender markers for words and doesn't use gendered pronouns at all, which also means that in a way, the concept itself is way less defined and pronounced in the cultural context. That, coupled with the strict and rigid code of conduct regarding politeness and formality means that it's generally not discussed in society on any level, neither in family, between friends nor in public education.

It's a binary concept that's dependent on one's genetic makeup and primary sexual characteristics that is assigned at birth and never discussed further. It doesn't involve choice or exploration, and it's not viewed as a spectrum the same way as it is customary in Western countries. But at the same time, traditional gender roles are built into society on every level, and while it's never mentioned, it's enforced and engraved in people way stronger than it is in for example Denmark.

So while as a teen/young adult, I could feel I didn't fit into the box of "girl" or "woman" the way others around me did, I had no vocabulary to describe my experience, and I definitely didn't have a platform for exploring it. On the few occasions when I mentioned it to some friends that I kind of view myself as both a man and a woman or maybe neither, the general answer was something to the effect of "well no shit?! are we meant to be surprised by this?", which was both baffling and very validating at the same time.

And then I moved out of the country and a whole new world of concepts and options and spectra opened up to me, where I also had the opportunity to learn more about my identity when it came to gender and sexuality. I quickly discovered that me not being straight was definitely a thing, and I learnt about labels that finally fit my experience and I found a community that welcomed me and that had people similar to myself in it. And that was all great, but it also taught me that gender was a Thing, and not only that, but it also had way more to it than just binary man and woman.

And I went down that rabbit hole hard. I started identifying as non-binary, tried on a lot of labels and pronouns, some really out there ones too, mostly privately, while trying to find the one that felt right. And of course in the meantime I've met and learnt about trans people, and it kind of hit me how that specific experience resonated with me. But of course, I couldn't just BE a guy... Could I?

Well, no, of course not! Because I had parents that raised me as their daughter, I had a husband who married me to be his wife, and I had always been presented and perceived as a woman... It's not like I could just uproot my entire identity and claim a new one just because it would make me happy... I had others to think of and consequences to dread, and in general, I was too fucked up anyway to really be concerned with something like what noise people make to address me or what concept do they identify me with. So I buried the question deep, never touching it, because as long as I wasn't looking, it didn't hurt and I didn't get confused. And this worked for a while, until it obviously didn't.

And then years had passed and a few things happened. For one, I met my other partner, who also identifies as non-binary and who is way more into the queer aspects of life than my husband. And with Them, I got to talk about the things that have always bothered me and that I previously was unable to talk about. They taught me the language to express myself, not only with words but also with presentation. And while confined in the safety of our shared home, I've stepped onto the Rocky Road of Recovery, that involved a lot of mental healthcare, therapy, exploration and coming to terms with my identity in more than one way.

In a way, unraveling the tangle of issues I've been carrying around helped a lot too. I've been living with the vague sense of "there is something wrong with me" for so long that it just became the everyday reality of my life, and I kind of accepted that all the things I now know are symptoms of certain conditions, were just how life was supposed to be, that the world was supposed to be this hostile, low-key but always uncomfortable place with occasional bursts of horrible pain. And through all that, I still held myself to the expectations I was presented with by my upbringing, because throughout my life, whenever I tried to ask for help in any way, I was generally met with blame and dismissal, and I was taught that the only option was to bite my tongue and power through. So I bit down and did what I could and every time I broke down, I just dug my heels in and kept going until one day I couldn't go on anymore.

And in a way, this was a blessing. Because finally, at the point where I completely gave up, I was presented with an abundance of care and actual help I've never received before. I went to psychiatry, I got my diagnoses, I got a social worker to help me, I got a therapist, and a damn good one for that, and I got the time to heal and figure myself out without having to worry about things like where I was going to live or what I was going to eat. And lo and behold, things started getting better. Of course, a year of therapy cannot undo 20 years of trauma and abuse, I didn't expect it to either, but it gave me tools to work with, ways to address and manage my symptoms and space to explore ways in which I could be happier, healthier and more stable than I've ever been before.

I'm on a good path, and in a good place now. I'm engaged to my partner, still happily married to my husband and we live in a loving, if a bit crooked family in a beautiful place at the countryside. For the first time I'm hopeful about the future and I feel like I have realistic expectations about my life and what I would be able to make of it. Of course there is still a lot of work to be done and a lot of ways I wish to improve, but these dreams had finally stopped being just that, and slowly morphed into goals, things I could actually achieve and I can see ways in which to do so.

And so, now that happiness suddenly became a viable option, I started wondering about the questions of identity again, and well... I guess I just felt like my time has finally come. I'm almost thirty. Yeah, that's a bit late compared to many who had this figured out by their late teens, but hey, I'm young, I have most of my adult life ahead of me! And I finally have the space and the support network that gives me enough confidence to pursue my true identity and everything that comes with that.

I'm taking it slowly though. It's scary as hell, and it's a huge step, and I still have a million questions and a million obstacles to overcome. But if my journey so far had taught me anything, that is that no decision is irreversible, there is no such thing as too late to change things, and that fear is never a good enough reason not to do what's right for you. I'm at square one right now, and I don't know if this is the path I'll stay on forever, but I feel like I owe myself to at least try. If I never committed to anything just because it might not last forever, I wouldn't be having the amazing life I have today, if I was even still alive.

So that's where I stand. Sorry about the insanely long ramblings, now you know everything you never wished to know about my inner workings, but I don't quite know how to explain this in any other way than the extremely winded one.

I miss you. I wish we could hang out and I could be, you know, not an absolute wreck for once :D I swear I'm a way funner person these days than I was when we used to hang out.

Lots of love,

Dae

P.s.: I guess this DID turn into a novel, sorry about that again! :$ xoxo

#open letter #explaining gender is long and complicated #one step at a time #positivity

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diamondorloj · 5 years

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You are so smart and well educated, especially regarding Israel and Jewish history, so I hope you don't mind if I ask you to help me, an uneducated (and to be honest mostly ignorant towards politics because of personal issues) person, to graps what the fuss is about all the political statements during ESC this year? I'm really confused and used google but I understand like maybe half of what's going on. Sorry to bother you.

Hey, thank you for coming to me. First off, I have studied and learned a lot abut the topics, but they’re very complex and full of details beyond my grasp. I’ll try to make this short, but your ask was a little broad and calls for a couple of explanations.

First off, there are rules against political statements and activism in every Eurovision song contest. For example, the only flags allowed in the arenas are the flags of UN states and of the EU, as well as unpolitical flags like the rainbow or the trans flag. In 2016, there was a conflict because the Armenian delegation held up a flag of Bergkarabach, which is debatable territory between Armenia and Azerbaijan.

Now, here’s the EBU statement: “In the live broadcast of the Eurovision Song Contest Grand Final, Hatari, the Icelandic act, briefly displayed small Palestinian banners whilst sat in the Green Room. The Eurovision Song Contest is a non-political event and this directly contradicts the contest’s rules. The banners were quickly removed and the consequences of this action will be discussed by the Reference Group (the contest’s executive board) after the contest.”

Determining a course of action on legal grounds based on the flag rule is going to be a little difficult because as of 29th November 2012, Palestine was granted the status of an observer state in the UN. However, showing the Palestine flag in Israel, on an Israelian stage, is considered political activism (and just generally…bad).

To briefly touch on the history of the Palestinian and Israelian conflict is almost impossible. The area of today’s Israel and Palestine used to belong to the Osmanian Empire, which shattered in 1922 officially and for a huge number of reasons. Great Britain took over mandate control for the area they then called Palestine, until it was possible to establish its own state. This was a common idea of the time for colonies that were supposed to be supported on their way to independency. Jews had fled to this area for centuries, but especially so during the 19th century because of rising antisemitism in Europe. While it wasn’t exactly pleasant to live as dimmi, people of the books and second-class citizens, it was relatively safe and peaceful, and Arab people happily sold their land to Jewish immigrants.

The idea of safety for the Jewish people led to the idea of a Jewish state, which is zionism. However, there were many options discussed as to where this Jewish state should be installed – among them were Uganda and Argentina. In the end, it probably was a mixture of many factors, like the Jewish connection to the land of Israel and Jerusalem, the fact that many Jewish people had bought land in Palestine for a relatively good price and that a lot of Jewish communities already lived there. Great Britain agreed to install a Jewish state, however they also installed the Great Mufti of Jerusalem, Mohammed Amin al-Husseini, and he incited violence and pogroms against the Jewish people. He vehemently opposed the existence of any Jewish state and also collaborated with the Nazis, organised a Muslim garnison in the SS, and is responsible for many people dying in the Holocaust because he prevented them from fleeing to Palestine.

So, after the Holocaust, the calls for a Jewish state for the Jewish people got louder because it had been made abundantly clear that no other state would guarantee their safety and survival. The UN was very newly installed and kinda improvised a new solution for the territorial conflict: There should be both a Jewish state, called Israel, and an Arab state, called Palestine. Jerusalem should stay under UN control. It was a hasty, imperfect plan, however the Jews accepted while the Arabs declined and the Arab nations surrounding Israel declared war on the same day Israel was founded. Against all odds, Israel won the wars and exists to this day. During the war, there were many refugees on both sides. Israel advertised for Arab people to stay and granted them full citizen rights. The Arab states called for Arabs to leave the places of war and conflict and were promised they could return to their homes when the war was over aka Israel destroyed. Well, guess what. Many refugees of these days and their decendants fled to Syria, Jordan, Egypt but were not taken in and instead were used against Israel. To this day, there are refugee camps in Jordan which does not grant any of their decendents who were born there city rights. Jewish people were dispelled from their homes and found a new home in Israel.

So, Israel as a state is the only guarantee in the world for safety and survival for the Jewish people. If you know any Jewish people in Europe, you will often hear their discussions and plans of going to Israel. The state exists, and it will continue to exist and thrive. To debate its right to an existence is politically pointless because it was granted by the UN and other leading political organisations, and antisemitic because it’s a direct call against the safety of Jews everywhere. Palestine wasn’t a state in the beginning at first and to this day has a special political status. In the 1940-1960s, a lot of Palestinians didn’t even want to be called Palestinians and the leading politicians in fact called for Palestine to be reunited with Syria, calling them Syrians. In 2005, Israel granted Gaza’s wishes and completely unrooted all Jewish life in the Gaza strip, making it free of living Jews for the first time in millenias. Unsurprisingly, peace did not follow.

Phew. I left out about a thousand details around here, so please use these points as a starting point for your research and take it with a grain of salt.

The conflict between Israel and Palestine to this day exists because Palestine does not acknowledge Israel’s right to exist and uses acts of terrorism and war against the state. Beginning of May, Gaza fired way over 600 rockets on Israel, aiming at schools and civilian buildings, killing 4 and injuring over 300 people. Their leading political organisation, Hamas, calls for the complete destruction of Israel and their people. They also refer to Israel as an oppressing state and an occupation of their territory.

One of the organisations that also believes Israel to be an occupator is the BDS organisation, which is a Boycott against Israel. It claims to be peaceful and harmless, but aims to completely isolate Israel in every way, culturally, economically, politically, from the rest of the world. They also want Palestinian refugees in Gaza and Westbank to have a right to return to Israel. However, given that Israel has a population of about 15 million people, and 20% of them are not Jewish, integrating about 8 million people of non-jewish Arabs into Israel would make Jews a minority in Israel and effectively end the existence of the only Jewish state in the world. (also good luck boycotting Israeli technology like the world's most efficient field hospital, the USB stick, and just about every smartphone works with Israeli technology.)

BDS called for a boycott of the ESC in Israel, Roger Waters himself foamed at the mouth when Madonna was announced to perform in Tel Aviv. One band that is at least close to the BDS is Hatari, the Icelandic group. They announced their intentions to use their performance to criticise Israel for the way they treat Palestinians.There was debate in Israel apparently whether they should be allowed to come to Tel Aviv, in the end they were allowed. They returned the favour by showing the flag of their biggest aggressor and threat to safety.

Funnily enough, homosexuality is punishable by imprisonment and death in Gaza. So I can’t help but wonder how well their support was received in Palestine… It’s a typically European knee-jerk reaction. They want to show solidarity with what they think is the underdog in that conflict, and they’re cowardly showing their protest in a democractic, safe country.

Madonna’s performance is problematic because she agreed to do a non-political act and proceeded to slap the flags on their dancers at the very last second, betraying the trust and rules of the hosts. Her act shows a big, scary man dressed like a soldier in a black uniform as Israel and a tiny woman in a white dress as Palestine, and in the beginning she talks about supposedly hidden crimes that ‘we all know of’ wink-wonk. It’s a tired provocatin and villainification of Israel imo. The reactions all over social media show that it was not actually perceived as a message of peace and love, but as a message of pro-Palestinian interests, painting them the victims and only the victims of the conflict.

There was probably more going on with political statements in the ESC, but you referred to Jewish history and Israel, so I hope your questions are covered with this response!

#marina replies #long post #i don't wanna tag this bc it will attract antisemites to my blog

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femalepersistence · 5 years

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I saw that post you reblogged about curious women secretly reading terf blogs. I've always been on the staunch anti-terf side. I even identified as trans at one point, but eventually I came to realize that the dysphoria I've experienced since puberty is, in fact, a reaction to the sexualization I experienced from childhood for being female. Anyway, the real reason I'm writing you today is because I have... doubts. The point of feminism is supposed to be to uplift the ability of ALL women (1/8)

“to have opinions, not just ones we agree with. Instead, even being gender critical will net us death/rape threats and hate speech. It’s scary. And too familiar. I’m a lesbian. So many things that I’ve seen and experienced are just straight up homophobic rape culture, particularly this idea that “genital preference” is transphobic instead of just… my sexuality. I don’t like dick, that’s who I am - I don’t care who’s attached to it, I don’t want it! And I hate being made to (2/8)

feel like a bad person because I don’t want it. I know that people say it’s just shitty people who try to convince women to have sex with them, not just trans women, but I’ve never had cis lesbians harass me the way trans women have. I’ve experienced some really fucked up coercion at the hands of trans women, but I feel like I can’t talk about it because it’s not the right type of trauma. When I was a teenager, I was tumblr friends (3/8)

with a trans woman in her 20s. We talked all the time. One day I was telling her about how I was walking home from school and got followed by a guy in a truck, and was really scared because he kept yelling really gross sexual things at me. This trans woman told me that it was “insensitive” of me to talk about this with her, because “at least [I] have tits”. Like I was literally a minor, talking about experiencing sexual harassment to someone I thought was my friend and mentor, and instead (4/8)

of supporting me, she told me it was rude of me to talk about it because I had the *privilege* of being recognized as female. Not long after she asked me for nudes and I told her I didn’t feel comfortable doing that… it turned into a whole argument splattered all over tumblr, and we weren’t friends anymore after that. She’s still here and runs an anti-terf hate blog, regularly tells lesbians that they’re disgusting, to “go choke”, etc. But anyway. Last year, a trans woman friend (5/8)

hit me up and tried to convince me to leave my girlfriend, who I have been with for years and have an entire life with. I thanked her for the attention and reminded her that I was in a happy long term relationship… she then told me that it was unhealthy for me to be in a monogamous relationship because I’m probably not having my needs met (?!) and that I should talk to my girlfriend about including her. I said again that I wasn’t interested and said we just weren’t compatible because (6/8)

I’m not attracted to her like that, and she basically argued with me (“but we have ___ in common!”), and broke down every reason I gave her (for several hours, in the middle of the night) until I was finally like “I don’t like penises, it won’t work”. At which point she freaked out and tried to guilt me into having sex by telling me that she feels ugly, unwanted, etc. Like trying to coerce someone into sex is NOT the right way to deal with those feelings! Anyway, I just feel like I’m (7/8)

literally going crazy trying to reconcile all of these feelings in my head. I’m not a hateful person. I don’t care what other people do. But this happens way too much. And women are harassed for talking about it. I’m learning to trust myself and my reaction to things, despite the world telling me not to as a young woman, and I feel like I’m right in saying that all of this is a serious encroachment on our right to even talk about our oppression. (8/8)”

I’m so sorry to hear this, friend. What these men have put you through is absolutely entitled and inexcusable. I cannot imagine what experiencing all that so closely must have felt, but I do sympathise and understand your feelings.

Thank you for sharing it! I know it must have taken a lot of bravery to open up and tell your story; so many women out there keep these sorts of experiences to themselves in fear of backlash and ostracising. I believe you, and I believe that all of our sisters who read this will believe you and feel as I do, as well.

I’m so glad and proud that you’ve come to these realisations and chose to trust yourself! Do not be apologetic about it! Standing up for what you know is right is not hateful, it’s what we all should be able to do. The very last sentence you’ve written is the truest way to put it.

Please, continue to be your own ally and stand up for your own safety and rights. Even if when you do sort out all of your feelings you don’t become a rad fem or even rad leaning, it’s important that you remember this truth you’ve just spoken and trust it as you’re learning to trust it now. I wish you all the best and all the enlightenment!

#asked #anon #long post #all the love to you friend!!!#s2 #bella.txt

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my-river-styx · 5 years

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A Big Fuck Off Rant Here Lads, Be Warned This Is About Terfs/Radfems As Well As A Bunch Of Political Stuff

I hate that God awful sinking feeling I get in my gut when I end up on a Terf/transphobic persons blog and I just, realise people that are that desperately hateful exist. I found a blog and was going through it, the name making me think they were trans friendly seeming as they had it in their name, only to become rapidly confused and kinda sick when all their posts were outright seethingly angry and hateful towards trans people. Like, the first few I read I thought I was misunderstanding but the further I got I was like, oh, no, they are a Terf/transphobe or align with their ideals.

I don't have a problem with people having opinions, it's your right to think and say what you want. But what I do have a problem with is you putting that vile hateful shit online where kids, trans or otherwise, can see it. To be fair, kids shouldn't be on Tumblr even after the shitty facade of a purge they did to make it child friendly. However, kids ARE on here and they ARE reading your posts and posts like them. It's how conservatives and other far right and even drastically far left groups manage to keep relevance in our lives despite most people disagreeing with them. It's through feeding kids their crap over and over again, sometimes without them realising or wanting to. It happened when I was a kid but luckily my parents aren't nearly conservative and simply hold similar beliefs in some areas. I grew up thinking those hateful things were right, and okay.

Until I opened my fucking eyes and realised they weren't. That you shouldn't feed children your hateful and poisonous rheteric when they don't understand the situations. I, as a little fucking child, genuinely believed that asylum seekers didn't deserve access to our country because they didn't go through legal channels. My parents offloaded their beliefs onto me and for quite a while I didn't even question it. The news/media in Australia didn't help either. But then I grew the fuck up and realised that I was fed a bunch of shit. That what they were saying was bullshit. That the media was trying to shove that shit into my head because it distracted me from them, and the government and what they were doing. It was to give me a fake enemy so I wouldn't see the very real one right under my nose.

Those people, all people, deserve safety and respect unless they are actively causing harm to others.

The problem is a lot of those children grow up not realising those ideas are old, outdated and toxic to change. That they are media crap designed explicitly to keep your eyes away from the blatant corruption of our world and that it is rapidly being killed. And they vote. And have blogs online where they spew their vile crap for newer generations to see. It's why I wish kids weren't allowed on this site. Because a lot of the crap on here is just that, crap. Shit that doesn't actually have a foothold in the real world or if it does, it's so small that it doesn't matter. Terfs and radfems on Tumblr have a huge foothold and use it to attack trans people just trying to live their fucking lives, not hurting anyone. Trans women especially are the victims of this, trans men less so, though it is still a big deal. Terfs and radfems are so concerned with policing who can do what that they don't police themselves.

Their community supposedly stands for women's rights (and by that they mean cis women because God knows they don't know how to be accepting) but as soon as a cis women comes forward supporting Trans women and trans women lesbians, they are instantly shut down, saying they must be an idiot or they are brainwashed. They only support the people who support them. They don't stand for feminism or women's rights, because if they did they would include trans women BECAUSE THEY ARE WOMEN. No, they just want to support their own little bubble and exclude anyone they don't like, just like we are back in fucking highschool with friendship groups and cliques.

For Trans men, if the terfs and radfems don't just outright dismiss them and call them confused women or women trying to escape the patriarchy, they are infantilized. They see us as women. Not as men. I can't force you to accept trans people and even if I could, I wouldn't want to. The fact you are so critical and hateful only speaks volumes about you as a person, about how you either hate yourself or are so drastically narcissistic that you need mental health assistance. Nobody filled with that much anger and hate for people they don't know and who are not doing anything wrong, is happy in their lives. You reek of low self-esteem and self loathing and I feel sorry that your way of dealing with that is to lash out at trans people instead of taking the time to listen to yourself and heal. It's not a way I wouldn't want anyone to live.

In the real world and not tumblr.hell, radfems and terfs have a much smaller voice. It's there, no doubt, and there are some much louder voices and ideas, but they are rightfully ignored for the fact they are just spewing hate. Anyone who does agree with them is normally a conservative, cis and straight. All things that mean they cannot understand the trans experience, let alone the LGBTQ one. Now, there are a lot of radfem/Terf lesbians, who loathe the idea of trans women in their spaces because "they aren't women, they are men just trying to invade our spaces and take them away". No, they aren't. I'm not a trans women, but I do know a lot about the trans experience on the other end as a trans man. Trust me when I say that trans people do not want to steal your space. They are people who want to find support and comfort within a group of people. Trans women can be lesbians because they are women. Trans men can be gay, because they are men. Hell, it was trans women who pioneered the LGBTQ movement, so you wouldn't have the spaces you do today without them. Learn to break free of your biased thoughts and move towards understanding how to be including and accepting. I don't even begin to understand every facet of the LGBTQ community. So many parts of it confuse me. But it's not my place to tell someone they aren't allowed to identify as something. Unless it is genuinely hurting someone, like pedophiles and maps (which newsflash, despite what terfs and radfems want to pretend and scream, trans women aren't. They just want to fucking pee and shit in the toilet for fuck sales).

So, this whole long 3:15 am insomnia ridden post really boils down to, is this. Try and step out of your bubble. Out of the comfort of your preset ideas on people and the lies and garbage fed to you by the media and even your parents in some cases. Try and understand others or at least take the time to listen instead of blindly attacking like a wounded animal. You are not inherently hateful. You deserve the chance to step out of your little cave and learn that the big bad world isn't out to get you. Trans women aren't trying to invade your spaces, or forces lesbians to date them. Trans men aren't trying to escape the patriarchy or are women haters, or trying to change what being gay means. We are real people deserving of respect. We aren't asking for you to bow at our feet. We are asking you to stop attacking us without reason, to stop listening to the horse shit the media throws out to defame and make us look like the villians. Because while your out here attacking innocent trans people, your getting your rights slowly erroded by a government that doesn't give two shits about you. That is purposely force feeding you garbage through the media to make you complacent and distract you from what's going on. Do you think big bussniess, the thing that bloody runs our governments now, gives a shit about you? About what you think? No, they want to make money. Your a number to them. They blatantly pull the strings of all major governments and take away any right you have to object. They are tearing the planet apart to the point 1/7 people will survive.

The planet is dying, rapidly, and if you stopped worrying about us merely existing and instead turned your attention to the real problems, we could do so much more to fight for our rights.

Your very lively hood, the thing you so vehemently fight for is not only on the line, it's at stake. They are trying to kill us, and your bitching online that a trans women went into the female bathroom to pee like a goddamn human being.

Get your priorities straight.

#transgender #mtf #ftm #radfem #terf #media #global warming #government #rant #look #ive just #got a lot to say

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templeofgeek · 6 years

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Star Wars Fan Art By Erin Lefler for #ForceAgainstCyberbullying

With the every growing popularity of geek and nerd culture, more and more people come together to join in on the celebration of their favorite franchises and characters. Fandoms are a wonderful place of community and belonging. Unfortunately, they are still not immune to the eventual toxicity that comes with any large populous.

One such toxic behavior is cyber bullying. No one is immune to cyber bullying. Whether you’re a young kid or a big Hollywood actor. Cyber bullying has a way of bringing a dark cloud over our happiness. Actress Kelly Tran was harassed online for her portrayal of Rose Tico in the latest Star Wars installment, The Last Jedi. So much so that it drove her to delete all her Instagram posts.

Cyberbullying is bullying that takes place over digital devices, and on social media platforms (such as Facebook, Instagram, Snapchat, via text etc.). It includes sending, posting, or sharing negative, harmful, false, or mean content about someone else. Sharing personal or private information about someone else causing embarrassment or humiliation. Some cyberbullying instances can be criminal behavior.

According the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention, Suicide is the second leading cause of death between 15-19 years old. It was this realization that sparked artist Erin Lefler to make a stand against cyberbullying. In an hopes that cyberbullying would not contribute to any of those deaths by suicide. We spoke to Erin about her project and what it means to her.

What is The Force Against Cyber Bullying Campaign? Erin: The #forceagainstcyberbullyingcampaign is a campaign I created to shed light on cyber bullying as a problem, as well as to provide support and love to those being cyber bullied. I feel with all the social movements and topics that we see every day on the news, in papers, and on social media, Cyber bullying as a topic gets put on the back burner. But it’s a HUGE problem!!! And it’s something I feel personally should be discussed.

Star Wars Fan Art By Erin Lefler for #ForceAgainstCyberbullying

What inspired you to create this campaign? Erin: I created this campaign after being on the receiving end of a lot of harassment and cyber bullying on some Official Lucasfilms licensed work I’ve done and non licensed Star Wars work that I have done. Which, after those started getting it, it then also started happening on other work of mine, like marvel work, original work, etc. As someone who really loves what they get to do for work, (I mean I get to work for one of the coolest companies [Lucasfilms] ever!) it really felt like a punch to the gut, and like all the air was taken out of me. These were so called “fans” of the exact things I create for work, some of which had been following me for awhile. And they were now targeting and harassing me, for what? Because they didn’t like the way the last movie went down? Because they didn’t like the character I had drawn? This was something that I feel shouldn’t be allowed to happen. No one should be able to call you names, threaten your safety and well-being, or trash your reputation just because you’re doing something you love. You see, I just make art for the company. I’m not the one who wrote the script, I’m not an actress from the film, or even the director. My job is so small compared to those directly involved with the film; like really small. How many people actually know my name compared to say Mark Hamill, Rian Johnson, or Kelly Marie Tran? I’m just doing what I’m paid to do like they are, and I’m also getting to do what I love. It’s every fans dream. But because I have the the name ‘Lucasfilms’ attached to my name, I receive the same amount of hate and harassment if not worse then what the big names do. Having this happen to me got me to think how this type of behavior is so prevalent on the Internet today, and how it has spread across so many fandoms/ many online communities. And most people turn a blind eye to it! Which, I really feel is not okay. I felt alone. I was hurt and confused as to why all this was happening to me. As someone who tries to always look for and be positive about everything, it was hard to accept people could be like this. I had been been physically bullied growing up, but this was a whole new thing I had to learn how to deal with. When I began to publicly share what was happening with my followers across my social media accounts, not only was there an outpouring of support to me, but I was also receiving so many messages of those who were also once cyber bullied, or were currently being cyber bullied. To hear so many voices saying “I’ve been there and I wish I had help” or “ I’m facing the same thing right now and I don’t know what to do”, honestly broke my heart. I wanted to be able to help them all, but how could I? I barely knew how to help myself. I had to take a small break from social media for a few days because I could feel it almost bringing me into a depression. I felt so helpless. Not only were the words of these people harassing me getting me down, but seeing so many others going through the same thing and crying out for help shocked me. I thought ‘How can so many be facing this, and nobody be speaking about this?’ We see and are bombarded everyday by headlines like “which celeb wore it best”, “this celeb got implants”, or “this celeb power couple broke up.” And while there’s nothing wrong with taking an interest in these things, I wondered why are these things are trending when people are out here LITERALLY losing their lives to cyber bullying. Which, made me realize there’s almost no conversation about cyber bullying. It was almost NONEXISTENT. Which is a scary thought when you think about it. What are we saying is ok and teaching is ok to the next generation? So after getting past my anger at those harassing me and the sadness over what they were saying, and for those who were also going through this experience too, I decided someone had to stand up. Enough was enough. We can’t keep pretending this wasn’t happening. So I determined the best way to do this was to create a campaign to spread awareness. Maybe it would become a thing and catch on. Maybe it wouldn’t. But I know I wouldn’t have been happy if I just stood by and let it continue to happen. What type of person would I be if I did that? I’m given the resources and the following to make something of it, so I said “well I mind as well do something.” And it sparked a fire within me, and A determination I never really had before.

Gaurdians Of The Galaxy Fan Art By Erin Lefler for #ForceAgainstCyberbullying

Why do think cyber-bullies bully other people online? Erin: Its hard to really determine the exact reason why people decide it’s OK to do it, but what I can come up with is many people find a strange sense of power behind a keyboard, and there’s almost no fight against cyber bullying. People most likely wouldn’t say these things if they had to look the person in the face, but hiding behind a screen? ‘Aha! There’s no consequence!’ People think. And it’s actually quite the contrary. Cyber bullying can have worse affects! Many people don’t know, but cyber bullying is the leading cause of suicide world wide. That’s a problem! And all for what; just so someone can feel better about themselves online? So they can feel bigger? Unfortunately this is what’s happening. When did this become an okay thing to do? If it’s not OK to do face to face and we raise awareness about that, why do we let cyberbullying slide? There should be accountability like there is for face to face harassment. But since there’s none, it’s open game for them you could say.

How much of a problem do you think cyber-bullying is in Fandom? Erin: I think it’s a huge problem! I’m sitting here, not only as someone who is working for Lucasfilms, but also as someone who is a fan of it. And sadly I’m watching this pull Star Wars fans apart. But it doesn’t stop at Lucasfilms. It spans from marvel, to Disney, to even cosplay. It spans over EVERYTHING. Fandoms are made to bring people together over something that we love. Not to slam someone from having their own opinions, not to say “oh, well this is cosplayer looks so much better than you” or “this art is so much better than yours.” Are you a fan of something? You probably express it in your own special way then. So if it’s okay for you to express it in your own way, it should be acceptable across the board for everyone to express in their way how they’re a fan. Now I’m not saying you can’t have an opinion on how someone expresses their love of a fandom, but is your opinion shared in kind? Should it even be shared at all? If we remembered this, I feel fandoms would become a lot less toxic towards one another. But as of right now it’s a big problem, and it needs to be addressed.

What can people do to stop cyber-bullying? Erin: Surprisingly there’s a lot you can do to stop cyber bullying from happening! First, here’s how not to be a cyber bully: if you don’t have something nice to say, simply DON’T SAY IT. Don’t comment on the tweet or post. Don’t direct message your displeasure to the person. Keep scrolling. Keep moving past it. Don’t hang up on the person to try to shame them. Just think, someone might do the same thing to you down the road. So how do you think you’d feel? If you wouldn’t like it done to you don’t do it to someone else. Simple as that. Next, here’s how to help if you see someone else being cyber bullied: stand with them. Stand up for them. If you see someone commenting ridiculously rude or obscene things at someone, maybe tell them something like this: “Can you please stop? This isn’t appropriate behavior. You wouldn’t like if someone did this to you, so don’t do it to this person.” Or if you see people ganging up against another person, saying it’s ‘just a joke’ or ‘constructive criticism’, try telling them something like: “Saying this doesn’t make your actions here ok. Please stop doing this to (insert person here). You didn’t need to say anything at all if you didn’t like this. So please just leave this person alone.” If you don’t feel brave enough to stand up like that, just send the person being affected by this a message saying something like: “hey I’m sorry you have to deal with this. If there’s anything I can do, please let me know. Please know that you’re not alone and if you need to talk I’m here for you.” If you’re being cyber bullied, there’s a lot of actions you can take to stop cyber bullying. First of all, do not isolate yourself. That’s the worst thing you can do. Talk to others. Surround yourself with those who love you and support you. Next, stand up for yourself. You don’t need to sit back and let it happen. You can politely tell the bullies to stop but honestly that will just add more fuel to their fire. They’re honestly not worth it. So the easy way to stand up for yourself is: 1) block, 2) report, 3) delete.

1). BLOCK. No one has the right to follow you if they’re harassing you. So just block them. This way they won’t be able to message you or comment at you to bully you. 2). REPORT. Now on some social media sites this is more effective than others. Twitter has an amazing report feature. Not only do they do an investigation on it, they let you provide proof to them of what’s happening, and give you updates on their findings. I’ve personally had to use this feature a lot on twitter and have seen some pretty great results with it. Instagram’s report feature isn’t as detailed, but you can still report if you have a problem. 3). DELETE. Okay, I know this might sound generic but yes, delete! (Insert Cyberman here…) if people are leaving harassing comments on your posts, or sending you harassing DM’s, there’s nothing saying they need to stay on your post. Just delete the comment. Delete the direct message. This way you don’t dwell on it, and it doesn’t bring you down. Shake it off!! Don’t give them the satisfaction of a response. Not only are you showing you’re a bigger person, but you’re also sending a message to the bully that their actions have no effect on you.

What message do you have for people who have been victims of cyber bullying? Erin: I think the message I have for those being cyber bullied, or those who have been cyber bullied is: you’re not alone. You’re NEVER alone. You are loved by so many and they all want to help you. There are so many who have been through the same things and have made it out OK. Talk to someone you trusts, don’t go through this by yourself. Don’t ever feel like these things being said to you are true. There’s a reason it’s happening behind a screen. Because the people who are doing it are cowards. And liars. And if they even just barely knew you, they’d know you’re so much more wonderful than their words. Simple as that. And if you’re feeling as the life you’re living isn’t worth living anymore, due to the harassment you’re going through: please rethink this. You are amazing, you are loved, and your life is more than worth it. Please seek help. You don’t have to go through this and feel this way alone. You don’t need to take your life because of people’s thoughtless actions. You have so much more to live for and accomplish. You are worth more than words. Please, remember that. I know I’m rooting you on… You can do this!! I’m going through it too. I know it’s not easy, but you can do it. And you can come out the victor. Just keep fighting against this.

Advice from Stopbullying.gov:

Prevent Cyberbullying

Be Aware of What Your Kids are Doing Online A child may be involved in cyberbullying in several ways. A child can be bullied, bully others, or witness bullying. Parents, teachers, and other adults may not be aware of all the digital media and apps that a child is using. The more digital platforms that a child uses, the more opportunities there are for being exposed to potential cyberbullying.

Warning Signs a Child Being Cyberbullied

Noticeable increases or decreases in device use, including texting.

A child exhibits emotional responses (laughter, anger, upset) to what is happening on their device.

A child hides their screen or device when others are near, and avoids discussion about what they are doing on their device.

Social media accounts are shut down or new ones appear.

A child starts to avoid social situations, even those that were enjoyed in the past.

A child becomes withdrawn or depressed, or loses interest in people and activities.

What to Do When Cyberbullying Happens

If you notice warning signs that a child may be involved in cyberbullying, take steps to investigate that child’s digital behavior. Cyberbullying is a form of bullying, and adults should take the same approach to address it: support the child being bullied, address the bullying behavior of a participant, and show children that cyberbullying is taken seriously. Because cyberbullying happens online, responding to it requires different approaches. If you think that a child is involved in cyberbullying, there are several things you can do.

Advice For Adult Victims

Justin W. Patchin from Cyberbullying.Org suggests:

“First, it is important to keep all evidence of the bullying: messages, posts, comments, etc. If there are ways you can determine who exactly is making the comments, also document that. Second, contact the service or content provider through which the bullying is occurring. For example, if you are being cyberbullied on Facebook, contact them. If you are receiving hurtful or threatening cell phone messages, contact your cell phone company to obtain assistance. Along those same lines, familiarize yourself with the Terms of Use for the various sites you frequent, and the online accounts you sign up for. Many web sites expressly prohibit harassment and if you report it through their established mechanisms, the content and/or bully should be removed from the site in a timely manner. To be sure, some web site administrators are better and quicker at this than others.

Also, please be careful not to retaliate – or do anything that might be perceived by an outsider to have contributed to the problem. Do not respond to the cyberbully except to calmly tell them to stop. If they refuse, you may have to take additional actions. If you are ever afraid for your safety, you need to contact law enforcement to investigate. They can determine whether any threats made are credible. If they are, the police will formally look into it. The evidence that you have collected will help them to evaluate your situation.

You should also take the time to check your state laws. We have discussed some of these laws on this blog and have a summary of many applicable laws here. In Wisconsin, for example, it is a misdemeanor if someone uses computerized communication systems to “frighten, intimidate, threaten, abuse, or harass another person.” It is also against the law to “harass annoy, or offend another person.” See what the laws in your state are to determine if the police should get involved.

If the threats or comments are detrimental to your health, safety, or occupation, you might want to consult with an attorney who specializes in harassment, defamation of character, false light, intentional infliction of emotional distress, or similar types of civil action. A letter sent from an attorney (on law firm letterhead) to the bully may be all that is necessary to get the bullying to stop.”

If You Are The Bully

Wiki How has a great post about ways to identify bullying behaviors and how to help control them.

Understand Bullying. Know what constitutes bullying. Learn to identify bullying and fully understand its consequences. Know what causes bullying.

Conduct a Self-Examination. Identify bullying patterns in your life. Identify your insecurities. Reflect on how it feels to bully others.

Take Control of you Behavior. Put yourself in the victim’s perspective. Ask yourself how the victims of bullying feels when you’re bullying them. Ask yourself what the reason is for the bullying. Stopping yourself from bullying. Take a moment to think. Remove yourself from groups of people who reward you for bullying others. Practice empathizing with others. Change outlook on things. Get help from a professional.

Make Amends. Apologize to people you have bullied. Forgive yourself. Treat people with respect from now on.

We can all help prevent suicide. The Lifeline provides 24/7, free and confidential support for people in distress

National Suicide Prevention Lifeline Call 1-800-273-8255 Available 24 hours everyday

For more from Erin Lefler you can visit her website at: https://linktr.ee/butternut_gouache

The Force Against Cyberbullying Campaign With the every growing popularity of geek and nerd culture, more and more people come together to join in on the celebration of their favorite franchises and characters.

#Butternut #butternut_gouache #cyber bullying #Erin Lefler #fandom #Force Aginst Cyber Bullying #GEEK #geek news #rose tico #rose tico instagram #Star Wars

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siliconchat921 · 3 years

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Skout Chatous

Following are the features provided by Chatous – Find people who share similar interests with hashtags. You can change the display name anytime and it is not searchable. Cross-platform sync between Chatous app and web platform. Skout: Skout helps you instantly meet strangers nearby or around the world.

In 2012, Chatous was founded and began its existence. The business has grown significantly since then and today has a large number of its employees. Chatous enables users to send text messages together with pictures. The video chat functionality is also mounted.

Skout review will help you knowing some important criteria, including features, pros, cons and more Read our experts and customers reviews, compare with other dating sites and apps or find an alternative.

Chatous – Ever think of dating online? Well in old times we played games on our computer, listened to music, downloaded and read books, played online games. Trans only dating app reviews. But some specific platforms formed for online dating which introduced only after 2005. It’s since then, people are spending more time in front of the digital screen and finding themselves someone special.

Online dating is easy and most of the times free. Most of the platforms don’t charge you to chat online with someone, or video call anyone. You can use the basic features of almost every website for free. But the thing is, there are many and choosing one of them is hard. Hence to make the work easy, we are discussing one such platform, Chatous.

Chatous

Chatous is an online social dating platform. It has brilliant compatibility which makes it suitable for use on both computers and smartphones. It is free to use. Using this, you can communicate with random people across the world.

Chatous was developed in 2012. Over time it has gained massive popularity and is one of the popular dating applications in the market.

In case you are a bit specific in selecting and communicating, this app will help you with that too. You can perform specific searches as you can search for people based on their gender, location, etc.

Features OfChatous

After getting short info, you must be wondering, what more can Chatous random chat do for you. Well, there is a lot more than simply chatting on Chatous.

Advanced search results: It produces some redefined search results. For example, if you are a lot picky kind of nature then you can use these advanced search filters present on the platform. Using these filters, you can search for a person meeting your needs, for instance, if you want to speak to a specific gender. Or you want someone from your local area. You can edit the search settings as per your requirement and you can search for the one meeting your interests.

Free: Yes Chatous is free to use. You can use the app’s basic features like communicating with strangers for free. You don’t need to pay for anything. However, for advanced features, you may need to have a subscription. The details for subscription plans are discussed in the article later on. However, the basic functions can be used for free.

Safe: Yes, Chatous chat with new people is safe and reliable. Its administrators are highly attentive to any unusual behavior and take strict action against any such malicious user. Apart from high safety from spammers, there are also extra settings. Using these, you can control your privacy.

Cross-platform compatibility: One of the best things about Chatous is, it is available on every platform. Hence you can use it on desktop, laptops, smartphones, everywhere. For smartphones based on iOS and Android devices, they can use it in the form of applications and get updates related to their profile anywhere.

Easy: Chatous random chat app is super easy to use. It has a user-friendly interface. It doesn’t contain many complicated menus. You can perform all the tasks very easily.

Stay anonymous: It allows you to remain unknown on the app. You can configure the settings for the same on the Chatous platform.

Chatous Random Chat App On App Store

Using this is easy. Anyone can use the platform simply by just following the on-screen instructions. However, we are providing here a step by step guide to help you out with sign up, and the first-time usage of the app.

As discussed, Chatous is highly compatible. This being said, it is available on the website, and application as well. You can install Chatous in the form of an application on your smartphone. It is available on both iOS and Android. Users can however use it in the form of a website too.

How To Create a Chatous Account

Creating an account on Chatous is no big deal. Just follow some easy steps and you are done.

To begin with, open it either on your desktop or your phone.

Now on the homepage, you see a create an account button. Click on it.

You will land on a new page.

Enter the email address you want to register on Chatous.

Choose the password you want to use for the platform.

Note that, you must remember the email address and password to login in the future in the account.

A verification email must be there on your registered email account. Please check and verify the email.

Finally, you have a Chatous account now.

How to use Chatous Random Chat

This section discusses in detail how you can use Chatous to connect with people after creating an account.

To begin chatting with anyone, simply click on Start New Chat.

After this, you will be able to chat with a random person. The system itself pairs you up with a stranger.

If you like you continue to chat with the other person.

In case you don’t wish to continue, you may click on the End Chat button present on the top right corner of the screen. Once you end the chat with the current person, you will see an option of New.

Clicking on the New button will connect you with the next random person present on the website.

Chatous Subscription Plans

Basic features of it are used for free. But some features of the platform require you to pay subscription charges to use all the features.

Subscription fees range from $0.99 to $199.99

Why choose Chatous

Chatous comes with all the basic features to be accessed for free. It is easy to use and comes with additional attractive features. For instance, you can remain anonymous on Chatous.

Chatous Alternatives

After reading about Chatous, we are sure that if you too are amongst the dating category you would give the platform a try. Well, you should because it is one of the trending and well-known apps amongst the young generation.

However, our current dating market is so full of all the dating apps that it becomes difficult to choose. Hence we advise that you put your hands on these platforms as well so that you get the best out of what is present in the market.

Dating Apps Similar To Chatous Application

Amino: Amino is an online dating platform. Using this, you can get in touch with random people throughout the world.

ChatHub: ChatHub is a free to use platform. It is an online dating social platform. Here you can meet new people and make new connections. You can use various face filters and search options to make the best out of ChatHub.

MeowChat: Available on both iOS and android, MeowChat is a great place. Here you can meet new people and chat with them. If you are a bit introvert, then you can turn on the settings and let only your real friends message you.

FaceChat: FaceChat lets you communicate to random people online through online going live chat rooms. To use FaceChat, you don’t need to register a login Id and password. You can chat in your local language. It’s completely free to use.

People Also Ask On Chatous

Can I stay anonymous on Chatous?

Yes, Chatous allows you to stay anonymous.

How do I improve my search?

You can use various search filters available on Chatous to search for someone who meets your interests.

What are the subscription fees on Chatous?

Subscription fees range from $0.99 to $199.99 on Chatous.

What if I don’t want to communicate with a stranger any further?

You can end communication with another stranger when you don’t like to carry things forward.

What do I do to make my experience on Chatous safer?

You can turn on additional privacy settings on Chatous to enhance your experience on the platform

Download Free Skout for PC using our tutorial at BrowserCam. Learn how to download and also Install Skout on PC (Windows) which is certainly developed and designed by Skout Inc. containing great features. Lets understand the specifications so that you can download Skout PC on MAC or windows computer with not much trouble.

Discovering new friends around you who share common interests is always good. There are a plethora of applications that can get the job done for you. But we’ve found SKOUT to be the best of all as it has a lot of customization options to choose from. Let’s find out what all you can do on the SKOUT app.

#1. Introduce Yourself!

You have your own space to get yourself introduced to thousands of people around you! Make sure that you provide the best information about you so that you can quickly find friends who share common interests with you.

#2. Meet New People!

Once you’ve created your profile, it’s time that you quickly find profiles that match your interest. That’s the best way to meet new people, of course, online and not in a person to start with!

#3. Have a Fun Chat!

The initial meetings on the app can go well and sometimes it can be fun when you chat with them and share your thoughts! It’s actually fun to know about strangers around you when you chat for the first time.

#4. Share Your Content!

Skout Chat

Just like you share the stories and statuses on Facebook, SKOUT also has a similar feature to share your content. If you see the content shared by any one of your friends, you’ll see an option showing how far they are from you at present. That’s the best part of SKOUT! But this would require the app to access your location.

#5. Go Live!

If sharing content isn’t your way, then go live and share your thoughts directly with your loved friends! It’s always fun to go live and share some stories or funny things on SKOUT as a lot of people might want to know about you personally!

You can also get updates from the nearby users and can also go through your profile to know who has checked your profile so far. You can also promote your profile with the in-app purchases if you want to gain popularity within no time.

So basically, it’s not all about making friends and meeting them. But this app can also be used to make an influence for local brands if you want to. Make sure it is being done the right way though! So are you ready to make new friends? Download the SKOUT app now!

How to Install Skout for PC:

Dating app for gym rats youtube. 1. Is meetup used for dating. The first thing is, you must free download either BlueStacks or Andy android emulator for PC using the free download button presented in the very beginning on this web site.

2. In case your download process ends open the installer to begin the set up process.

3. Go ahead with the straightforward installation steps just by clicking on 'Next' for a couple times. The most successful dating sites.

4. During the very final step select the 'Install' choice to begin the install process and click 'Finish' when ever it’s over.For the last & final step click on 'Install' to start the actual install process and you’ll be able to mouse click 'Finish' in order to complete the installation.

5. Straight away, either within the windows start menu or maybe desktop shortcut open up BlueStacks app.

6. Link a Google account simply by signing in, which can often take couple of minutes.

Skout Chat Italiana

7. Good job! Anyone can install Skout for PC using BlueStacks app either by locating Skout app in google playstore page or by utilizing apk file.It is time to install Skout for PC by visiting the google playstore page once you successfully installed BlueStacks App Player on your computer.

Skout Chat Login

It is possible to install Skout for PC while using the apk file if you can’t see the app in the google playstore by simply clicking on the apk file BlueStacks program will install the app. One may go through above same exact process even when you choose to go with Andy for PC or you are planning to select free download Skout for MAC.

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mermaidfan76 · 6 years

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Homeless Autistic Girl

Hey guys... this really kills me to ask, however right now I’m homeless at the moment.

Technology, I’m living with a long time friend who is hounding me to find a job since she believes it’s just so damn easy and move out by The end of February. I’ve put out application after application and only maybe a couple have called back for an interview. Only for them to tell me the same exact thing over and over, “You don’t seem like you will do well for this job.” With out even giving me a garsh darn chance to show them I’m willing to work my butt off.

Yet, they hire people who are literally ALLERGIC to manual labor, and pay them twice the wage to appease them so they don’t get sued. It pisses me off. I have Autism and PTSD, I watched my mother and fathers beloved dog get run over by a car, I know these people have mommy and daddy’s that coddle them. My parents died on September 22, 2013. My sister’s threw me out in the cold and said I’m on own. I’m still here, sadly. Not one day goes by and I don’t think about giving up and killing myself. Love to give that bayberry (under a new name) Bitch and all the rest what they wanted in the first place! With heartless pieces off shit like them in this world, I definitely don’t feel it’s worth the aggravation!

You push, you kick, you fight, you bite, you bunch, but guess what you end up someone else’s lunch! It’s survival of the fittest and you’ve won the game if you have Money, Fame, and/or Power! Just 1 on these gives you the right to control poor peoples lives!

You can play the advocate for good all day, but turning a blind eye to the innocent people that are truly in pain by the very people you are advocating for. Who’s the real villain? Saying the people who did nothing deserve it because someone said its poetic revenge... read a book. Get your facts straight, you really think they would attack now? Why didn’t they attack back then? People don’t postpone revenge -_-...

(if I had a grudge against a person, I’d want to get them now, not expect my descendants to attack his descendants. 1. How do I know if they’ll follow through? 2. What if everything is patched up and my other descendants didn’t know that and still desire to take their revenge? (They don’t even know what the whole argument is about... could be about stealing the last slice of pizza) This is about taking over the world just like before! We stopped them once! They’re trying again, however they fooled you!)

So with politics, islamphopia (more like not wanting an ideology of woman haters who desire to take over any free country and turn it to a world of oppression and insanity), racism (a political term used when a white person doesn’t agree with you), feminist (because women are oppressed because they have tits and a vigina), fatphopia (because veggies don’t taste like cake, if they did we’d still become fat, why? Because we’d get sick of sweets and want savory tasting veggies that you only get from cake... oh the irony), LBGT without Q (Queers are just feminist men who are really flamboyant gays... and real gays try to avoid, ever heard the term, “Queer as a Clock work Mouse.” Man I miss my English mother! The LBG, The Les, The Bi, and The Gay, do as you wish... Hey I’m you Bi, I find shapely girls just Be A U Ti Ful to draw, have to get that full body motion. Gays, love ya, best guy friends and you give perfect fashion advice, Lesbians, you’re very easy going and easy to talk to, al yal are A O Kay in my book. Trans, um... look umm... I’m female... I have more of a male mind... we can find common ground here can’t we?) and that’s what I go through everyday. Half the words I’m called... how do they apply to me? Like racist? I judge by character, not by skin tone.

(All I see is another human being in front of me. If you act like you’re above a human being, than I’ll treat you the way you treat me. Not one human is above another. If you have earnt that privilege than you are granted that only by the people who gave you such power, however they have the power to take it away. That is the true purpose of the second Amendment! In short; “a president is a civil servant to the people of his/her country that he/she has sworn to protect! As such nothing is beneath them!”)

I really wish people would do their homework...

My friend I was talking about earlier; well she’s not only getting on my case about finding a job, but she’s also pissing me off about politics. Her plan is to be an American History Teacher. She wants to teach her class how America was founded on the “Socialistic” Principles we use today and that’s bullshit! We wouldn’t have many of our largest company products that I bet everyone of you see every single day, more than likely every minute of your day.

(For Starters:

Let’s start off with Ford, if America was a Socialistic Society, well then all of you who drive a Ford let alone a car in general, would walk everywhere. If it wasn’t for Ford’s Model T being a Successful test run clearing the way to Model A. Ford’s company could only up from there. (Btw: anyone who drives the VMW Bug- just a little trivia for you did you know that the original design was created by Adolf Hitler himself? Adolf Hitler was the original Designer for the shape of that car the VMW Bug, just a little tid pit I know from Graphic Design School, hope that doesn’t ruin your VMW driving experience:D)

Another one I’d like to point out: McDonald’s, that famous Golden Arches fast food places started as a ma and pa rest stop, now it’s one of the biggest fast food chains in the world! Mickey D’s started again in America! Again how is that possible in a Socialistic society?

Socialism is structured to where everyone is equal... equal pay... equal healthcare... equal quality of living... doesn’t count the politicians! In this system if you work you’re an idiot. Those who sit on their ass get everything handed to them, those who work their asses off barely survive. So why bother putting yourself through that much torture. Because:

No one working:

No power

No cable

No doctors

No teachers

No police

No food

No safety

No security...

Why? This would have been a good thing! This here proves Socialism doesn’t work!

If everyone decided to not work because they’re getting ripped off; than America shuts down! The government is screwed! And so are the moochers!)

Those are only two examples of capitalism being a good thing.

There is so much more... not to mention the feminist aspects like Susan B. Anthony: Voicing her “opinion” by voting for who she thought would be a good president. Of course the judge was going to let her off with a warning because “woman privilege” (woman today would be like okay and do it again), however she, Susan B. Anthony, A Real Feminist, (no Feminist is an insult to her, She a Real Woman, The Genuine Wonder Woman!) demanded she was sentenced to jail just like any man who broke the law! (Please oh please can we do that to these modern, pussies who call themselves women!) The first woman to fly a plane over the pacific Amelia, or the women who rose up against unjust treatment Rosa Parks, I mean come on. Worst of all is, she’s being taught tha John Wilkes Booth was Republican and Abraham Lincoln was Democrat... and it’s reversed. There’s a saying the liberals came up with: “if those damn n$&@€ must vote then they should only vote Democrat!”

My friend has become heartless and greedy, I’m in a fucked up spot because of a malicious brat who played innocent and didn’t understand what happens when you compromise. It’s not one side surrenders and the other gains, but what do I expects from the preppy college school type, (not all preppy girls are mean, I just have this personality that sends the wrong vibes and makes them more territorial)AKA mean girl type... however, this girl demanded everything goes her way or else. She’s from Georgia, yet she comes to higher elevation part and in the middle of the US, it’s winter yet she expects sunshine and beaches? All of us to be drinking out of a coconut? Yes, her hair is blonde at the roots, and she smokes pot in the apartment. Kind of gives you a clue on the person she is. Of and her Boy Toy is always there... when I stayed there. She blamed me for her messes, and her food she didn’t eat. Thing is I hate fish. Well another one to count she has a low IQ from the Mercury poisoning... and here I thought fish helped with brain development.

Anyway, it was hell, so my friend volunteered on the condition that I find a job and move out ASAP. I’m tryin as hard as I can here.

Being told no everywhere I go is very discouraging. I’ve made a gofund me campaign to maybe to maybe help a little... I don’t expect anyone to donate really... if anyone could click the link and share it to a friend they know and spread it around.

By February the only place I’ll be staying is my car on the side of the road... just sharing the story helps. Thank you.

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trisockatops · 7 years

Link

Teens are getting queerer. According to a recent trend-forecasting report by J. Walter Thompson Innovation Group, 13- to 20-year-olds (known as Generation Z) are even more sexually fluid than millennials—while 65 percent of millennials identify as exclusively heterosexual, only 48 percent of Generation Z does. The "trend" is unsurprising—increased legal protection, social acceptance, and media visibility of the LGBTQ community have afforded more opportunities for queer people to love in the open. That being said, according to the National Coalition of Anti-Violence Programs, a national advocacy group for local LGBTQ communities, 2016 was the deadliest year on record for LGBTQ folks, and that's not counting the 49 victims of the Pulse nightclub massacre.

As the purview of queerness expands and the need for political solidarity and resistance against LGBTQ violence becomes all the more necessary, how can we think critically and compassionately about desire, identity, and labels? I talked to Suzy Exposito, Ales Kot, McKenzie Wark, Whitney Mallet, Davey Davis, and Javier Nunez Cespedes, a group of individuals who deal with issues of identity in their personal and professional lives, about love with or without labels.

Ana Cecilia Alvarez: What's your relationship to questions of desire and identity?

Suzy: I am a bisexual woman in a long-term relationship with a bisexual man. At this point in my life, I refuse to date straight people. In my experience, they just don't understand certain fundamental things about my friends and me. That said, I could generally say the same about monosexual people. I have been on dates with cis lesbians and felt a similar lack of common ground. Because I wouldn't "pick a side," my sexual identity was always in flux to them and not to be trusted. I don't think my sexual orientation is in flux at all!

Ales: Before people used the word "queer" to describe me, they called me "weird." But when I moved to Prague and lived on my own for the first time, I slept with girls and boys, and had threesomes and group sex. I realized that people would have these impositions on what it means to be queer for them. I didn't want to narrow it down too much. If someone asked, I'd tell them I'm bisexual. Of course, I could see many people judging the shit out of me. But, even though I pass as a straight dude, the fact of the matter is that I am a fluid sex monster.

McKenzie: I am somebody who passes for a straight person. I am reluctant to be a spokesperson for queerness because I get to avoid all of the difficulties that are involved in that. I don't advertise, but if people ask, I'll them that I've had sex with men, and I will again.

Javier: I'm a transgender mixed-race Latino who identifies as bisexual. I like to joke that I've identified with literally every letter in LGBTQ at some point.

Ana: Has identifying—or not—as queer resolved anything for you? Or how has it complicated things?

Javier: Part of the beauty of "queer" is that it doesn't have a real definition and that it's open-ended, but that also can be a major drawback to it. By not having a concrete definition, people can use it any way they want, and it can and definitely has been co-opted. Also "queer" doesn't really say anything about someone's sexuality. When someone tells me they identify as either gay, lesbian, or bisexual, I have a better idea of who they date. To me, "queer" has always had radical anti-oppression trans-inclusive meaning behind it, but it's clearly not the definition everyone uses.

Whitney: I guess I would reluctantly identify as queer. I don't think of queer as an essentialist identity. It's about identifying with certain politics. It is a decision of what community I want to call my community. People still ask me if I am gay or straight. Sometimes I think, maybe it's on the way, maybe by the time I'm 30 I'll be gay. Or I'll always be slutty. In life, we're always becoming, so it's fine.

Davey: The amazing thing about being able to come out and find a name for yourself as a queer person is that you feel like you fought for it. My partner and I have both had family members who completely rejected us. So it's this thing that I've fought for, it's my identity, it's who I am—you get defensive and protective with it. And so I can see people's kneejerk reaction, Oh, are they really [queer]?The more compassionate me, and the part of me that has been in that position, knows that's bullshit, to be like, Oh, they're not really [queer]. And as much as we fought for our identities, at the same time, identity is fluid, and fluidity is challenging for most people. Even if you are gender fluid or your sexuality is fluid, labels are, by definition, rigid.

Ana: To me, labels seem imperfect, at times flattening, but politically necessary. Sometimes we need solidarity and shared identities. What do you think?

McKenzie: It's crucial to remember that there are a lot of men who sleep with other men that do not think they are gay. They aren't in the closet or in denial. They just have different categories. Some people don't think having sex with men is an identity. It's an act, and you might have other acts you do and other identities.

Davey: When I had just come out, I had an instinct to taxonomize: "I am a femme boy." But I've moved away from that because I've lived in the world long enough as a gender-nonconforming woman that visibility isn't exciting anymore. I've realized that being visible isn't that great. It's pretty scary, and most people outside of your community think you're gross, and it affects your chances of getting a job. Foucault said that visibility is a trap. We all want to be seen and understood and be known for what we are, but unfortunately, if what you are is queer or bisexual, they will hate you.

Ana: Visibility is a trap! Either you're legible in mainstream culture—you pass—yet you aren't seen as queer in queer communities, or you're visibly queer, and thereby a target for homophobic and transphobic violence.

Suzy: Visibility makes all the difference in how you experience queerness. Visibility makes you more vulnerable to attack. And it's a threat that not all queer people face equally. I'm a cis femme woman with long hair, and men harass me all day for being a woman, but absolutely no one knows I'm queer unless I'm with someone who more visibly is. On the other hand, my partner is a drag performer and very gender fluid, but on most days he presents masculine for his safety. On days when we're both femme, we're much more prone to harassment. Not everyone's queer presentation is so conditional, though, so we have to be mindful about how much space our voices take up and which experiences are simply not ours to claim.

Javier: Disclosing being trans or bi is a choice I can make every day. What I can't choose is walking out of the house every day as a Latino man. I experience way more gender-based violence (mostly from the NYPD) in that way than I ever did before I started medically transitioning. It's something I wish I'd been prepared for. It seems like the people wrapped up with visibility around their sexuality are cis white people. It feels like a luxury that people of color and a lot of trans people do not have. I just want to go out in the world and not be worried about being attacked or killed. I don't care about the rest.

Ana: One way I've been trying to think about this is by shifting questions of queer authenticity—is someone really queer or not?—to queer accountability. Are there certain actions or values we can hold one another accountable for as members of a community?

Ales: I ask, How can I encourage a sense of safety around myself and my home? How can I contribute my own energy? On the most immediate level, I think about just listening. I think just listening to people and not comparing or trying to place them is crucial.

There is a level of performative allyship and people trying to ride on the wave of a higher social consciousness more than they actually care for others. I don't know what to do with that except to be sure that I don't do it.

Whitney: I think there are moments when checking is important. I was at my next-door neighbor's New Year's party, and there was a moment where I noticed there were a lot of straight people there. It's a predominantly gay and trans space, and I think it's worth thinking about how you literally are taking up space at parties. There was a line, and at a certain point, other people couldn't get in, and for some of the people, that's the only party that's welcoming for them.

Davey: This reminds me of who gets to be at pride. I do think straight people need to think three or four or five times about whether they should go to some queer event, even if other queers are bringing them. But, if the ultimate goal is liberation of some kind from white cis hetero imperialist Western patriarchy, it can't come down to "make sure there are no heteros at the party." Probably, straight people shouldn't be at pride, but if you're the kind of straight person who's going to march with us, and protect us, and work with us, we can work together on the larger political goal of liberation.

McKenzie: When you get to middle age, it's just not that big of a deal anymore. I'm into this or that, and I'm going to go and get it with whoever is up for it. It's so much easier. I get why it was important in my 20s and 30s, but now I am not worried about if I am or am not this or that queer being now. I'll just go find my friends.

My favorite quotes from this that I just want to emphasize:

Davey: And as much as we fought for our identities, at the same time, identity is fluid, and fluidity is challenging for most people. Even if you are gender fluid or your sexuality is fluid, labels are, by definition, rigid.

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allthecanadianpolitics · 7 years

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Earlier this month, Sophie Labelle, a Montreal-based, internationally renowned transgender author and activist was subject to a violent cyber attack, including death threats and hate speech. Most chillingly, the attackers not only temporarily destroyed her popular website, but also published personal details — including her home address. Sophie is now in hiding.

Bill C-16, a bill designed to protect gender identity and gender expression in the Canadian Human Rights Act and Criminal Code, explicitly addresses the violence that Sophie most recently experienced. If the bill were made law, Sophie’s attackers could face additional sanctions for hate speech.

Indeed, Bill C-16 helps to redress incomplete protections for some of the most vulnerable women in Canadian society today: transgender women, who face unconscionably high rates of physical, sexual and fatal violence.

For over a decade now, however, legislation aiming to protect transgender rights has stalled. Numerous lives have continued to be tragically impacted by discrimination, harassment and violence in the meantime.

Much of this stalling has occurred in the Senate, where a small but vocal minority of senators has successfully been able to prevent the bill from moving forward. A third reading for the bill will take place in the Senate starting Tuesday.

There have been other detractors. Most recently, Vancouver Rape Relief (VRR) and Pour les droits des femmes du Québec (PDFQ) claimed during a Senate committee hearing on the issue that the protections for transgender people in Bill C-16 pose a threat to feminism and female-only spaces.

This claim garnered national headlines. But it proved to be spurious.

In the immediate aftermath of the testimony, Canadian feminists moved quickly to distance themselves from such exclusionary views. On May 17 we published an open letter entitled, “Canadian Feminists Support Bill C-16 / Féministes canadiens pour la loi C-16,” on iPetitions. The petition argued that the bill “is deeply needed and long overdue” especially because “transgender women are more likely to face poverty, homelessness, barriers to education and violence than are cisgender (non-transgender) women.”

In just one day it gained more than 1,000 supporters. Signatories include people from women’s shelters, churches and women’s studies programs in universities across the country.

On the same day, this petition was joined by a strong statement of support for Bill C-16 from the Ontario Coalition to End Violence Against Women. The message was clear: trans women are women.

As the coalition wrote, “Bill C-16 will bolster efforts to ensure sexual violence support services are available to all survivors of violence across Canada.” It went on to affirm the importance of equity and safety for trans, two-spirit and gender diverse people.

The immediate and vocal response from feminists across the country, who were anxious to counter the testimony given at the Senate against the bill, makes it clear that human rights are at the very heart of contemporary Canadian feminism. Feminism is more rich and diverse than it has ever been before. A new generation of young people is committed to tackling oppression as an intersectional project of resistance.

There is wide-ranging support for trans rights in Canada that goes all the way up to the Prime Minister’s office.

On International Day Against Homophobia, Transphobia and Biphobia, Prime Minister Trudeau declared, “Today — and every day — I join Canadians to support gender expression, gender identity and sexual orientation rights for people in Canada and around the world, and to challenge stigma, violence and prejudices wherever they occur.”

Bill C-16 cements such sentiments and good wishes into reality. A large majority of the members of Parliament also support this recognition of trans rights.

It is now time for our senators to decide if they too will protect gender identity and gender expression. These measures are needed not only by those who are transgender, but also by less-understood non-binary and gender fluid individuals.

As the Senate meets to vote on the third reading of this historic legislation, we urge them to remember that gender diverse people of all ages, from children to seniors, should be embraced as equals in this country, with the full protection of the law.

Kimberley Ens Manning is an expert with EvidenceNetwork.ca, a principal of the Simone de Beauvoir Institute and associate professor of political science at Concordia University. In her capacity as a founding board member of Gender Creative Kids Canada (GCKC), Dr. Manning frequently gives public presentations on transgender children and their families.

Dr. Julie Temple Newhook is an Instructor of gender studies and professional associate with the faculty of medicine at Memorial University. In 2014, she founded the national and local peer support groups, Canadian Parents of Trans & Gender Diverse Kids/Parents canadiens d'enfants trans and Parents of Trans & Gender Diverse Kids — Newfoundland & Labrador.

#feminism #Trans #C16 #Transgender #LGBTQ #LGBT #intersectional feminism #inclusive feminism #Canada #cdnpoli #canadian politics #canadian #canadian news

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