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#and that my job was able to go remote
oatbugs · 20 days
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I REFUSE TO LIVE A BORING LIFE
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gideonisms · 11 months
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See I think if I'd been born a guy I wouldn't be this pathologically avoidant trying to plan my career because there are plenty of situations you can find as a cis man where you just Do Tasks in awkward silence and you can get to those as a woman but you have to go through the rings of hell socializing first and then besides, a lot of those jobs already have so many men that you stand out when the whole point was you Don't want to do that
#you gotta be god's strongest soldier to survive this shit and i am not! i am god's weakest most pathetic soldier!#i survived five years of customer service crying weekly and getting harassed and being a baby about it#when i got promoted no one would listen to me and it made me constantly anxious and then so tired it took me a year to be able to#think about having a job as something remotely positive and stop crying about it#idk how other women are doing this shit a guy treats me like his sexy servant and i feel BAD and upset for years#and think of what he said 7 years later and they only touched me on the shoulder and made comments other people go through worse!#but i am not strong or determined i just want to go through my life in peace and stop talking to people altogether#it wasn't just guys who treated me badly older women made fun of me and called me lazy and stupid#tutoring was fine but i felt like i was putting on that same performance and at that point it all felt so awful i just. didn't want to#i can see no way out of talking to people for the rest of my life and it gets me down sometimes#i know i get to come home but even then i will probably need people to live with#i basically only like my family and close friends talking to me sometimes even that is hard#sometimes it's way easier to type and feels less awful#i think i have to just keep on keeping on until i can finally get good enough to freelance edit and code that's the only thing i can think#of doing that doesn't make me cry#emails are fine they suck but i don't have to control my face and tone so.
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quilleth · 4 months
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I don't want to go back to work tomorrow T_T
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debbiechanclub · 5 months
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You know that episode of The Simpsons where Homer posts pictures of Maggie over the "Don't Forget: You're Here Forever" sign at work so that it says "Do It For Her"? I bought a keychain that says that in anticipation of my impending full-time return to an office for the new job.
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pepprs · 7 months
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genuinely so angry and scared im shaking. how many other times this week this month this year have i been exposed without knowing it. do people even tell each other anymore. it’s just so grim. it’s so fucking grim
#purrs#delete later#covid19#i am fighting for my fucking life every day to stay safe and to keep the people around me some of whom are disabled / chronically ill /#immunocompromised / medically vulnerable safe. i am fucking fighting for my life. it’s already hard that i am usually one of two people in#any given room still wearing a mask let alone an n95 mask. hard and bad enough that we get looks for wearing masks and people think im crazy#for my life still being on hold and for my family still basically never going anywhere. ITS FUCKING WORSE that we are still very much in the#throes of all of it and we are in constant physical and quite frankly EXISTENTIAL danger not only of getting sick / becoming (more)#disabled / literally fucking dying but also returning to the absolute hell of lockdown which while important was psychologically damaging in#ways that are difficult to even articulate. like not only have we as a society decided to not give a shit about unpacking all of that and#healing from the trauma and assuming everyone went through the same thing when we very much did not and to just send everybody back to#school and work because 🤑🤑🤑🤑🤑capitalism🤑🤑🤑🤑🤑 but we have ALSO decided to pretend like the freakish unceasing danger just doesn’t exist#anymore and to get rid of every tool we had available to keep us safe or at minimum make people have to pay exorbitant amounts of money to#access them because 🤑🤑🤑🤑🤑capitalism🤑🤑🤑🤑🤑 !!!!!!! im TIRED. im so fucking tired of it. i am so fucking exhausted and angry and scared. and i#HAVE the luxury and privilege of being able to afford n95 masks and covid tests and to be able to work a job that i can do remotely if i#need to and to not be disabled or immunocompromised. what makes me fucking furious is we decided to throw all the people who don’t have#that access or privilege under the fucking bus and forget about them lol. but what do you expect from a country rotten to its core the way#it is lol. im fucking despondent. why are we living in an incinerator.#* the lockdown(s) werent just important they were necessary. and arguably we should have another one even though if we do i genuinely fear#for my mental health both during and afterwards and quite frankly before. im tired. i am grateful for the life i live which has resulted in#part from the different things that have happened because of the pandemic but i also so desperately wish this never happened and every day I#think about what life would be like if it hadn’t happened. the grief of it all is unspeakably big.
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My dad is really seriously planning this trip to Washington in the summer of 2026 I'm !!!!! Gonna see orcas !!!!!
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melto · 4 months
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like awesome that there is a snowstorm coming but i think it is still me and my roommate’s assigned via lease shoveling time which. i dont want to think about!
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serendipitous-mage · 4 months
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not that ive had anything near a 'normal' year in well over a decade but thinkin about how proper fukt and hectic thiis one has been
beginning of year was working for one of the most insane managers/companys i ever have
middle of march i put in my two weeks, because in addition to a Lot of other reasons that i had already been struggling to not leave over, my manager straight up DOXXED a coworker(/their family member) on linkedin--and on the company linkedin as well no less--and some other drama that was just the last straw and i wanted some scrap of sanity back and to avoid that happening to me
end of march, hear that its not just possible but likely current roommate is moving, and while i *couldlve* gone with, it was an area i didnt want to go to
uncertainty from march-august, and not much progress made on job apps in that time because that is Such a huge/panic inducing process for me anyway without being unsure of living situation on top of it
roommate moving confirmed, i try and find someone who could take their spot where i already was but a lot of my friends had literally *just* moved in the last few months, so missed my chances
move in with some friends who already have so little space and money and now they have to share with me
finally hear about a job in like november
the job changes .. many times. first its a call center gig for this company, then they call back with 'the same thing but for a slightly different thing under the same parent company', and it actually does sound a little less hellish, so i go with that. all of the paperwork/emails i receive have the name of the first company on them, but when i asked about it they said it was just because of the parent company thing it was all good. they have me pick a schedule... all of the options are 40 hours, i had not asked too many specifics because i dont have the luxury of being picky rn, but i have never worked full time and am already always exhausted and cant stay awake all day, so this is going to be absolute hell. also there are 12 days where additional hours are Required, 4 of which i wouldve otherwise had off
i pick a schedule. they write back that some things changed here are some other schedules to pick from, i pick a new schedule. when we had initially talked on the phone for the first company i was told a setup day end of november and starting in december, but because of returning people/potentially from moving to the other, now im not starting until the end of january, which fucking sucks because ive been at $0 and owing friends for covering me for months. get a call saying some people dropped out, do i want to start a week earlier? yes ofc i do i need the money. get a call again saying the same thing, so now im starting the beginning of january instead.
equipment arrives: it is.....one small box......with the tiniest dinkiest little laptop with a whole entire one USB port and one USB-C port...great, perfect, this will work so well considering my monitor is VGA, and all three of my headset, mouse, and keyboard are USB connections. i do happen to have a USB to USB-C adapter for other things, but thats still only 2 of the 4 things i need plugged in. i tell them this, they through a series of CC'ing other people into the email find someone who knows where my Other equipment is. theyve sent me another monitor that has a USB-C connection and a (extremely chintzy) USB splitter. ok, technically everything can be plugged in now, whatever
we have a setup teams meeting: the lady running it mentions they just wana make sure our mics/cam work and then we can have them off for the meeting, 'because youre going to need both of them right? :)'. no. no i had bETTER not need both of them you are NOT having me ON FUCKING CAMERA for 40+HOURS A WEEK i will SCREAM.
but then. oh, oh boy howdy, and then...
the meeting was for both of the roles id been offered because the initial setup for both is the same, people for both the assignments are present. last i knew, i was on company B. i already have 15 pages of notes for company B from things i could find on the website and in manuals because i am an anxious bitch and wanted to make the first few weeks as painless as possible for me, im not confident, but i do have a fairly decent start and a basis understanding of the software already, so im a little less nervous about it
then the lady mentions...that....if youre with company A, you were sent one monitor, and if youre with company B...you were sent 2...
......i look up at my Singular monitor
and type in chat like 'hiiii um, so im with company B but was only sent the one monitor ?'
lady has someone else present double check my assignment
and they send
"youre with company A :)" legitimately with a smiley face
and when i tell you i am losing my shit-
15 pages of notes useless. company A is going to be higher call volumes and for a more generalized people which means more stupid questions and more confused customers. from what i can find on the website, their only support option seems to be phones, so there isnt even the possibility of having emails or chats which i Greatly prefer to phone calls, the other one had email at least. NONE of the emails they sent me said ANYTHING about the change, i can only assume it was one of the phone calls where they asked if i wanted to move up a week in the schedule, but it was NOT made clear i was changing anything other than the start date, just "theres an opening in the other class", and in the follow-up emails each time they only said "Thanks for your quick move to this new schedule" and "I'm excited for your earlier start date!", which does NOT imply i have been switched assignments
yall..im devastated lmao. i can never just Find A Job it always has to be some fucking batshit insane garbage like this
i start next week and im ......not excited to say the least ;w;
it only goes until april...but its going to be 40+ hour weeks (and i *doubt* any overtime pay, its technically a contractor role), on exclusively phone support (i fucking hate phones they make me mad anxious), i still havent been able to get solid notes for this one because their website is fucking unhinged and its taking me Forever to dig through it all, the laptop is tiny asf and there is no space in the shared room ive got rn to set it up in a way thats good at a desk or something im probably going to be sitting on the edge of the bed and using my shelf as a table which i Know from experience is going to kill my back and neck esp with the longer hours, they potentially want my camera on while working which is Not happening i might get fired for that even if i can keep up with the hours, and if i do get fired or quit? this job came through a recruiting agency which had got me one of my last remote jobs, and i dont think theyd be too quick to help me find something else if this one ends badly, so im really kind of forced to continue even if i didnt have such a pressing need for income asap
and all of this.. for a whole entire $16/hr :'D
happy fucking new years ;_;
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corvidcall · 11 months
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minnesota might make public higher education free (for familes making less than $80k a year) and im like.... girl i was JUST saying yesterday that id move back to MN if i could!!! so if that goes through id maybe consider going back for a few years so i can get a bachelors degree for free....
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vvelegrin · 5 months
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not sure how many long weekends off it's going to take to fix me, but so far it's more than two. <3
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fractallogic · 1 year
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just want to say that the salary range of one of the jobs I applied to today was $118-140K, which is such a laughably stupid and unfathomable amount of money that I just shut it out of my brain until I was pondering idly just now
my salary right now is $54K. my only-touch-this-money-for-research-costs stipend is another $15K (so yeah I have access to $69K per year, nice). i can't IMAGINE making basically my entire two year postdoc of pay... in a year.
like I know you get paid better out of academia but holy fuck it has NOT been sinking in
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pkmndaisuki · 2 years
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one of these days i'll get my shit together. somehow. i hope.
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robotsprinkles · 11 months
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my mum likes to do this thing where she'll say "you're an adult now so you can make your own choices and if you disagree with me or your dad on our decisions you can tell us"
but the moment I say "hey. I want to take a gap/break year from uni to get myself in order and build the skills I need and recover from the last few years of everything"
she goes "yep. nope. you can't do that [insert whichever reason she's decided on this year]"
and I'm just sitting here wishing she 'd either stick to her word or just. not lie to me for once.
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doctormage · 2 years
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I think I might be having a hard time yall lmao
#my bf’s car had a flat tire over a week ago. like almost 2 weeks ago#he kept hemming and hawing#neither of us could get the tire off but he wouldn’t get a tool that would. didn’t call anybody or google anything#i work remote so I don’t NEED my car but like. I’m trapped here. i don’t like it. i need my car.#finally someone came YESTERDAY MORNING#i said last night I needed to go to target. my bf didn’t say anything#i get out of bed so fucjing excited to have my car back and go to target#i look outside. no car. where the fuck is my car#i text him like ?????? hello???#but they’re working on a cell tower near his job so he has extremely spotty service#so I probably won’t hear back til it’s too late. and I’m afraid his car isn’t safe to drive bc why else wouldn’t he take it#just fully fucking. broke down into tears on my couch#i just needed fucking. two things from target#but I’ve been eagerly anticipating them. i don’t get off work til 8pm and then I’m usually too tired to go anywhere#this is such a stupid fucking thing to cry over but he didn’t tell me. he didn’t warn me when I said I wanted to go to target#and now the one thing I was looking forward to!!!! cannot be done today at all. and I don’t know why#this is not the first thing I’ve had a disproportionate reaction to#and I haven’t been able to do ANYTHING around the house. like incapable#so I almost have no laundry and my office is so messy it literally makes me nauseous to look at#so uh. I’m a little worried! lol!#p
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