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anarcoqueer1994 · 10 months

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I need more of Eddie telling the band! Need it! Fix my brusied heart! Fix Steve's bruised heart! Tell me that he's everything! He is everything!!

Part 1 here.

Hope this fixes it <3 I'm going to admit my toxic trait is being angsty and not always being the best at fixing it. But I hope this is good. Thank you for reading!!

"Dude, what was that?" Gareth finally breaks the awkward silence between the 4 of them. They all look at Eddie.

He presses his palms to his eyes until he can see little white dots when he opens them again to stare at his three best friends. He feels like dirt. Actually less than dirt. He cared so much about what they would think of his dating Steve, that not only did hurt his favorite person in the whole world, but he did not even trust his friends enough to give them a chance. He finally lets out a sigh before saying "That was me fucking up. Like royally fucking up.".

"You going to explain, maybe?" Jeff asks, slowly putting the pieces together but confirmation from Eddie would be nice.

"I, um, I mean Steve and I have been seeing each other for the past 6 months, since Spring Break actually." Eddie finally says, holding his breath, waiting for a response.

"You guys have been seeing each other for six months?" Garreth parrots back in disbelief.

"Yea. He's my boyfriend...well he was. I actually don't know now." Eddie says sadly.

"You have been together for like half a year, and you didn't tell us, why?" Caleb asks, confused in why Eddie would hide this.

"I don’t know, man. It's just, in high school we would talk so much shit about people like Steve. And I know Steve better now, so I know how much of a great guy he is but like he is still an ex-jock. And I was worried about, you know." He mumbles.

"You were worried what we would think. Man, what is wrong with you?" Jeff laughs. "Eddie Munson isn't supposed to care what people think, even your loser friends."

'Besides, if you say he's good, we trust you, okay?" Gareth adds. "But I do have a couple of questions."

Eddie can't help but smile at his friends, even though his stomach still hurts thinking about the look on Steve’s face from a few minutes prior. But he indulges Gareth. "Ask away, I guess I owe you guys."

"Does he treat you alright?" Gareth asks simply.

Eddie nods softly. "He treats me better than anyone I've ever been with. He's always so soft and gentle with me. I swear, he looks at me like I'm something special, and I don't know why. Sometimes I don't think I deserve it."

"Do you love him?" Gareth follows up.

"God, more than anything." Eddie says with out hesitatation.

"And do you think he loves you?" He asks simply.

"I know he loves me. He tells me ever day." And not just with his words, but with his actions too. Steve shows Eddie he loves him every day with all the little things does for him.

"Then why are you still sitting down here, dude?" Gareth asks. "You better go and fix this before you lose him." He says it likes its the most obvious thing in the world.

Eddie hurriedly nods. Gareth is right. He has to talk to Steve, like now. He practically jumps up from the table, nearly tripping as does.

As he runs past his friends and up the steps, he looks at the cupcakes Steve had sat down on the small table by the steps. They looked homemade, a little messy but perfect. Steve had piped little silly hearts on them all, and in the center were little frosting dice. He can't help the way it makes his heart skip a beat. Steve was ridiculously romantic, and Eddie loves that.

He continues up the steps, two at a time, hoping Steve and the kids are up there, but they aren't. He frantically makes his way to door, only to see them sitting in Steve’s car through the window, still in the driveway. He's relieved.

As soon as he opens the door, all their eyes shoot up. He can see the look on Steve’s face, obviously trying to hold back tears. Even now, Steve is trying to be strong with the kids. Their eyes though looked like they could kill Eddie, even Dustin. He fucked up badly.

He nervously makes his way over to Steve's open window. When he gets there, Steve doesn't say a word, doesn't even look at him, just stares forward. Eddie tries anyway. "Stevie, can we talk...please? Alone?" He looks at the other 4 in the car.

Steve squeezes the wheel harder. He knows if he talks, he will start crying. And he doesn't want to do that in front of Eddie. Fuck, this hurts so bad. It felt like when Nancy called him and his love bullshit all over again. He is bullshit...he is nothing. Just a washed up ex jock, who is just there when people need him. He doesn't get the happy ending, the true love.

Dustin speaks up "You're an asshole, man. Go away." Not even Mike speaks up to defend him. Who does though, surprises him.

"He's not...." Steve whispers, unable to speak any louder. Steve can't see it, but Eddie sees all the looks of pitty shot at him. Eddie knows Steve shouldn't be defending him, but he is.

"No, Stevie. I am. I am an asshole. And I'm so sorry. Please can we talk?" Eddie begs.

Steve lets out a sigh before turning to the "kids." "Go on. It's fine. Go and clean up your shit so Mrs. Wheeler isn't mad." He tries to say in a straight voice.

They reluctantly get out but still shoot Eddie dirty glances as they head in. Eddie nervously walks to the passenger side and gets in.

"What do you want to talk about?" Steve chokes out, still not looking at him.

"What I said in there wasn't the truth. Steve, baby...I am so sorry. I did not mean it..." He tries pathetically.

Steve's hands are shaking as they stay rested on the steering wheel. He finally turns his head to look at Eddie. "Then why did you say it, Eddie? If you didn't mean it, why did you say it?!" His voices cracks, as a little tear escapes, running down his cheek.

All Eddie wants to do is reach over and wipe it away, but he thinks better of it. "Because I'm an idiot, sweetheart." He replies softly. "I shouldn't have hidden us, but today everyone was ganging up on me, and I got overwhelmed...and it just came out. You are not nothing, baby."

"Come on, Eddie! There had to be some truth to it, or it wouldn't have come out. I am not an idiot." Steve says in his bitchiest voice, his wall going up, trying to protect himself from more hurt.

It feels like a punch to his gut. Eddie really made Steve believe their could be some truth in his words. "Steve....I promise you, I was just being some vain asshole, too worried about my reputation as a cool metalhead." He says, knowing how lame it sounds to say out loud. "How could I, Eddie "the freak" Munson, possibly have ended up with the prettiest boy in school."

"What you said was fucked up, you know..." another tear escaping, but the punch is gone from his words.

"I know...I know. I am so sorry, princess. I'll do anything to make it up to you." Eddie pleads softly.

Steve gives him a sad smile, anger melting away leaving only hurt. "I'm just having a hard time believing that I'm not nothing...I mean, you didn't want to tell your friends. And like, I know I can be a little much sometimes, and overbearing. And I'm sorry if I embarrassed you...."He whispers. He feels like nothing, like bullshit, like trash. He isn't endgame, he's never anyone's endgame.

Hearing Steve Harrington apologize for being embarrassing makes Eddie feel like he is in some alternate dimension, maybe he never left the upside down. But more concerningly, to hear Steve sound so small, broke him. Steve was the bravest, sweetest, bitchiest, protective, hottest person he knew but right now, Steve felt small. And it destroyed him to know he caused this. He caused Steve to feel unimportant...unloved. and he had promised himself that he would never do that to him.

He reaches over and grabs Steve's hand, squeezing softly. "God, baby, you have nothing to be sorry for. I am the one who was so self centered, that I did the worst thing I have ever done. I hurt you." He moves his other hand to Steve's cheek, and to his relief, Steve leans into, doesn't pull away. "I somehow made the person who is everything to me, feel like nothing. And that just won't do."

"Eds..." Steve whispers.

"Stevie, I promise you, I will spend everyday trying to make it up to you."

"You...you don't have to...." Steve says softly, sadly.

"Yea, I do. Because Steve, you are everything. You are it for me, sweetheart. There is not a single day I will let go by without you knowing that. I will never let anyone, including myself, make you feel like you are nothing." Eddie leans closer, resting his forehead against Steve's.

By this point, tears were freely falling down Steve’s face. But now he's smiling, even laughing a little. "You are such a sap, Eddie." He jokes before leaning in and placing a tiny kiss against Eddie's lips. "And I love you so much."

Eddie feels a million times lighter as he keeps holding Steve. "I love you too, baby. And you are everything...you are everything....you are everything. " He repeats as I to make sure Steve understands how true it is, not leaving any room for doubt in Steve’s head.

Thank you for reading again! Also side note, did not want to drag this out but definitely see the others eating all the cupcakes downstairs, leaving only one and Steve and Eddie share it.

Tag list (you all are so sweat) There are more but the max mentions was 50. I will reboot and add more

@notsopretty-notsopink @pukner @justforthedead89 @lololol-1234 @little-crickett @thing-a-ling @swimmingbirdrunningrock @oldwitcheshat @my-baek-hurts @thequeenrainacorn @derangedhermit @plantzzsandpencilzzs @littlewildflowerkitten @ronance-is-my-wife @xjessicafaithx @cinnamon-mushroomabomination @sofadofax @just-a-tiny-void @whalesharksart @death-thee-nervousqueer @estrellami-1 @starman-jpg @oblivion-void @thequeenauden @thealwithnoname @sapphirecobalt-1 @thelady-mary @silentlycorrectingyourgrammar85 @theluckyalien @cheeseyberg @breealtair @messrs-weasley @heartthingsstuff @paintsplatteredandimperfect @tillystealeaves @pearynice @bela-valdis @beckkthewreck @breadboi66 @th30ra3k3n @0o-queendean-o0 @spideysteveloml @lauras2912 @seths-rogens @lovely-little-lass @envyadams-vs-me @meccaminayah @heartstarstar-blog @weirdandabsurd42 @virginlemontea @stevesbipanic @yulecogs

@sereinpetrichor @kittycat1810

#stranger things #steve harrington #eddie munson #steddie #steddie ficlet #fix it fic

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lov1ngreid · 5 months

Text

cherry blossom

⌕ studying abroad in japan you never would’ve thought you’d be drawing the stranger sitting under the cherry blossom tree.

⟣ ﹒bau!spencer + gn!reader

⟣ ﹒content warning: none! just fluff

⟣ ﹒wc: 1.7k

⟣ ﹒ 🧋me being delusional because I want to live in japan so bad

listen to what i did when i wrote this! ➘

You hadn’t always gone outside to paint, but today the weather was your favourite you simply had no choice. Cold enough that you could see your breath a little in the atmosphere, but not too cold that your jacket and scarf weren’t enough to keep you warm.

You were fixated on the largest cherry blossom in the garden, hundreds of bursts of baby pink and white coming from the branches, and a light brown trunk flowing all the way into the sky, branching off in different directions.

It was easy to start sketching, you always loved coming to this garden, not many people knew about it so it always seemed quiet, only the sounds of the water trickling through the stream and the faintest noise of the metro occupying your ears.

One of your most favourite places in the garden happened to be the bench on the small bridge overlooking the small river stream watching the koi fish jump and nip at the surface making small little popping noises as they did.

you always found yourself absolutely indulged in your art, completely zoning everything else out.

Just your pencil tracing along your sketchbook.

So hyper focused on the beauty of the tree in front of you, you had yet to notice the most beautiful boy you’ve ever seen in your entire life sitting just below it.

His outfit consisted of browns and neutrals, paired with a deep purple scarf and blue and orange polka dot socks you could see barely peeking out from his ankles and glasses propped up on the bridge of his nose. You watched quietly, completely entranced in how gorgeous his presence was. you looked completely in awe, his long slender fingers dragging down the page before flipping to the next one, and his glasses that sat in front of his pretty brown orbs.

Without giving it another thought you started to sketch the beautiful boy in front of you, starting with his fluffy hair, glancing between your sketchbook and your subject of choice.

A ringtone beaming from somebody’s cell phone broke your trance from the boy sitting in front of you, watching as he reached in his right pocket and pulled out his phone to answer it it only took him seconds to snap his book shut shoving it into his bag before getting up from his position under the tree.

He looked incredibly rushed before making his way towards you, phone still to his ear as he mumbled incoherent words into it, incoherent to you at least, considering you were still focused on how beautiful his face was.

Before you could even consider sparking a conversation with him, heavy footsteps onto the wooden bridge seemed to be inching closer and closer, you get a better look at his beautiful brown hair and the way it falls over his glasses a little.

It was almost like he was so close that you could see yourself in the reflection of his glasses, like he was speaking to you, almost as if you could feel his body heat next to yours.

“Um densha-no… what is it…. eki-wa doko desu-ka?”

“What” you breathed confused, he was that close to you, and that reflection you thought you saw in the reflection of his glasses, was in fact you staring at him dumbfounded as he tried to talk to you in Japanese.

“Oh thank god you speak English” He chuckled, rubbing his neck as pink flushed his cheeks, even his voice was dreamy “Do you know where the train station is?”

You giggle a little at him before nodding “you just have the leave the gardens take a left, you’ll see the signs, it’s around the corner” you smiled taking a moment to rake your eyes over his tall figure before meeting them back to his.

“Thank you” he smiles back at you, his eyes light up beaming down at you, he was so incredibly gorgeous and his cologne left you feeling so addicted, he brushes past you for a moment obviously in a rush before pausing twisting on the balls of his feet to turn around “I’m Spencer” he furrowed his eyebrows, almost as if he was talking to himself.

His almost innocent demeanor made you giggle a little “Hi Spencer” smiling back at him “I’m y/n” you tilted your head a little, a little surprised he had stopped to talk to you considering he was obviously in a hurry.

“Are you busy?” He rushed searching your face for any sort of disgust or disapproval, you shook your head in response, you truly weren’t busy but you would’ve cleared your schedule regardless “will you walk with me?”

You felt like your heart had made its way to your throat with how fast and hard it was beating, like it was all you could hear, without answering you just nodded your head making your way next to him.

Your mouth ran dry, what where you supposed to say? You just sat there and drew some random person for like 20 minutes you definitely looked like a stalker.

You both walk a little in silence before he timidly turns his head to face you “Do you live here?” He asks in attempts to kill the silence between the both of you.

You nodded your head before glancing up to meet his eyes “I study here” you smiled nervously shoving your hands into your warm jacket pocket.

“That’s awesome” he beamed smiling down at you, his perfectly row of teeth almost blinding you “I’d love to live here, it’s so peaceful”

you both walked in beat with each other perfectly matching each others strides “especially when I don’t have people watching me read” he snickers smiling at himself

Suddenly you snap your head towards him in complete horror, your face turning incredibly pink “you saw that?” You squeaked absolutely horrified that he thought you were some sort of weirdo.

He laughed turning around to face you “of course I did” he rolled his eyes playfully still laughing, hilarious to him, but to you, you’ve never been so embarrassed in your entire life “But I only noticed cause I was watching you paint that tree”

“oh” he was watching you?

He loved your timidness, it almost matched his, seeing how embarrassed you got when he caught you watching him only made his heart flutter even faster

“You don’t think I’m weird or anything do you” you rushed, convinced that absolutely nothing could pull you out of this embarrassing hole.

He shook his head gripping at the strap of his shoulder bag “No I don’t think you’re weird” smiling back at you cocking his head to meet your eyes “I thought it was sweet… you were looking at me the same way you were looking at that tree” he pointed a little at the pink covered tree you were just sitting near.

If even possible, more heat rushed to your cheeks before you stared at the busy footpath in front of you. Absolutely humiliated he had seen you absolutely swooning at the sight of him, before you knew it, you both stood at the entrance of the train station, it really was just around the corner.

“Thankyou y/n” he nodded nervously hands shoved in his pockets, your quietness made him a little nervous that he had said something wrong, did you think it was weird he was also watching you indulge in your art so peacefully.

Nodding your head a little with a quick smile, you both stood staring a little into each others eyes, both looking like you were reading each other. The hustle of people around you pausing and the volume of the city sounds fizzling out as you both daydreamed, lost in the depths of each others eyes.

That was before Spencer’s phone buzzed a few times to let him know someone was trying to contact him urgently, snapping the both of you from your gaze, Spencer smiled again before turning quickly to hop down the steps.

“Wait-” you rushed taking a few steps forward to meet him, Spencer reacted immediately turning around to meet your gaze again, you looked up at him before unbuttoning your bag and searching for your notebook before pulling it out. Flipping through the pages of trees and buildings you had watercoloured months before.

Spencer looked down in awe at all the pieces of work you had created, although you weren’t purposefully showing them to him, he was ultimately amazed by your talent and wanted them all framed in his apartment.

You huffed a little before finding the page you were working on just before, a beautiful pink cherry blossom and the prettiest blue lake.

And the prettiest boy sitting under it.

In awe once again Spencer was completely oblivious to the fact that not only were you painting the tree he was sitting under, but him as well. He fixated on it examining every line and detail you had captured, even the polka dots on his socks, his eyebrows furrowed as he heard a ripping sound.

You had ripped the page from your book, careful to not ruin your work but simply tearing it from the confinements of the notebook before shoving it in his direction, confused Spencer looked down at it a little before reaching out to grab it.

“I want you to have it” you nodded closing your sketchbook placing back into your bag.

“It’s beautiful” Spencer admires looking at the piece close up.

“It’s okay” you giggle a little embarrassed your eyes meeting your shoes for a bit as you watched him scan over the piece for a little longer than you thought was necessary “wow you like it that much” you laugh watching his reaction.

He nodded quickly looking back up at you grinning “Well… I’ll make you another” you smile tilting your head a little, Spencer nods again before stumbling to remember why he’s even at the train station.

“Um- I have to go but will I see you tomorrow?” he rushed continuing to walk down the stairs as he talks, glancing between you and the station behind him.

You nod without hesitation at the boy grinning in front of you, he stops walking down the stairs for a second before waving a little, returning the wave, you watch his rush down the stairs glancing back at you every few steps.

BACK TO MASTERLIST

#spencer reid #criminal minds #spencer reid x y/n #spencer reid x reader #spencer reid one shot #spencer reid fanfiction #matthew gray gubler #spencer reid fluff #lov1ngreid #Spencer reid imagine #criminal minds x reader

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maxidentscene · 2 years

Text

skz would like to facetime…

⚘ genre. fluff

⚘ members. ot8

⚘ warnings. I didn’t proofread this work, I apologize for grammar or spelling mistakes

chan facetimes you when he knows that he won’t be able to see you for a while

It’s best to say that Chan doesn’t really like calling or facetiming, he doesn’t even like texting. Nothing beats talking to you in person, being able to see how you brighten up when you talk to him, being able to study your gestures and body language

But, there will always be times where he just has to see you, even if it’s by facetime. “Look at you!” He beams as soon as you pop up on his screen, the biggest smile spread from ear to ear. “Are you ready for bed? Don’t tell me I woke you up.”

He did, but that was something that he didn’t need to know. “Is it another late night?” You cut to the chase, flashing him a smile of reassurance, hopefully conveying that it was okay and that you understood. Chan could only nod, eyebrows furrowed in guilt. “Wipe that look off of your face.”

A sad laugh from him brought a grin to your face, in all actuality you were just happy to see him. He had been going through the wringer lately, unable to catch a break, barely finding time to take care of himself. This was part of the job though, the hard work would pay off in the end and that’s what kept the both of you going

“Well I appreciate the call, I know you aren’t the biggest fan of this type of thing,” you make note of your gratitude, snuggling up further into his pillow, catching his scent as much as you could. He blew you a kiss before hanging up, sending you straight back to bed

lee know hosts a cooking show and you’re the lucky viewer

“I have a question for the chef,” you raised your hand, holding back a snort at the way Minho’s head snapped back to look at the screen. He had propped you up on the table so that you could get a full view of the kitchen and everything that was going down in it. “Did you wash your hands before touching the ingredients?”

Looking distraught and kind of annoyed, he only waved you off, going back to chopping up some veggies. “I never said I was taking questions, did I?” He brought over the tray of freshly diced onions, peppers, rosemary to show off to you. Of course, you showered him in compliments before he could nag at you for being a bad audience

He had started this little routine where he called everytime he prepared a meal on his own. The journey would always start in the grocery store, where he took you along via phone to pick up everything in the recipe, taking you back home to get everything organized and down to taste testing. It was quality time in his eyes

“I have another question!” You waved your arm around in the air, catching his attention and waiting for him to come closer to the camera. Once he was in full frame, eyebrow raised and anticipating something ridiculous, you only softened up at the sight of him. He was being so domestic with his cute apron and cute oven mitts. “Where did this company find such a cute chef?”

God, he wanted to melt into the floor beneath him. Your little comment caught him so off guard that he couldn’t even think of a response, the tips of his ears turning red. Instead of indulging you just a little, he stood back up abruptly, claiming that he just has to watch over the food otherwise it would burn

changbin facetimes you so often but it never lasts longer than 3 minutes

It’s never surprising to see a facetime call pop up from Binnie, it was kind of fun actually. You were always excited to see what he wanted to show you or what was on his mind. “Do I know you?” You joked as soon as you picked up, tearing a laugh from Changbin on the other side of the phone

“I’d hope so,” he smirks at the camera, a sparkle in his eye that’s telling you that he has something amazing to show you. Getting comfortable, you watched him jog for a small amount of time before he finally killed the suspense and cut to the chase of this daily call. “I have something insane to show you.”

Insane was a weird word for him to use to describe something, you really couldn’t guess what was so “insane” especially since he appeared to be wandering about in the woods. He turned his camera, pointing it to a random tree and at first you couldn’t understand the hype. But, as you looked closer, you noticed that the both of your initials were carved into the bark

“Did you put that there?” You were in awe because it didn’t really seem like a thing that he would do and he confirmed your suspicions when he shook his head rapidly, his eyes as big as yours

“I found it like this, isn’t that insane?” He was overjoyed, the apples of his cheeks all rosy. The entire call felt like a beautiful moment, which was so different from the usual calls of him showing you his flexibility or joining him when he makes a sandwich. “It feels like destiny, right?”

hyunjin desperately needs to tell you goodnight every night

Hyune never calls at the same time each night, the times in which he facetimes you are very inconsistent but he does manage to call you before you fall asleep just to tell you how much he loves you. He loves having someone to be so intimate and loving with, so he takes advantage of his boyfriend privileges

“This call is a little later than usual, Hwang Hyunjin.” You teasingly scold, but really you don’t care. You knew he had a schedule, eagerly waiting for him and refusing to fall asleep without hearing from him first. “Tell me about your day.”

Almost instantly, you could hear the relaxation in Hyunjin’s voice as he told you all of the stories that he’s been waiting to tell you. With such a calming voice, you could fall asleep just listening to him, and he noticed the way you fought back sleep with heavy eyelids, biting back a lovesick smile

“Guess what my favorite part of the day was,” he watched you wake yourself up at the question, laughing so hard that the camera shook with each giggle. You blinked once, twice before gathering your thoughts and telling him that you weren’t a mind reader. “The part where you fell asleep on me over the phone.”

This caught your attention, accepting defeat and stuffing your face into your pillow. He reassured that he was only joking, leaving you to go back to dreamland after letting you know that he loves you

han facetimes you when he is too far away from you

The last few weeks haven’t been the easier for either of you, him being halfway across the world only made you feel empty and he felt the same way. It was just so hard considering the two of you are all over each other every chance you get. He’s just such a comfortable person to be around, time spent with him feels endless

“This fucking sucks.” Your honest words had him gasping over the phone, the surprised look on his face making you break out into the biggest smile. He was still the same, even hundreds of miles apart. You could tell in his eyes that he felt the same way, despite his dramatic reaction, they were a little too glossy and you were afraid he’d cry if you brought it up any longer

The hotel room looked so comfortable in the background, you found yourself staring at the sheets, wondering how nice they felt. “I save a spot for you,” he confesses, scratching the back of his neck because he just said the most embarrassing thing of his life. “In the bed.”

He must’ve caught you staring and you can only feel your heart swell at his words, even if they were disgustingly cheesy. You knew this wouldn’t be forever and that you’d have your boyfriend with you soon, that’s the only thing that eased you when you felt so lost

“I think we should hit the lights and sleep,” you suggested, trying your hardest to get the both of you out of your feelings, happy when Han agreed with you. “You’ll be back eventually, Hannie.”

felix sets you up against his monitor so he can indulge in his two favorite things in the world at once

The game sound effects are always so sudden and loud, Felix doesn’t even try to hold his laugh when he sees you jump at a random crash or bang from the corner of his eye. He does end up eventually turning the game volume down to spare you, besides you were so nice to sit there and chat him up while he played

“Are you winning?” You asked even though you knew he wasn’t, you could tell by the way he was running his hand through his hair so aggressively and by the frown that pulled his lips downward. Every now and then, he’d get so heated that he’d curse profusely and it was honestly the funniest thing in the world

The question earned you a small glare, but he couldn’t stay mad at you for long, instantly smiling and poking his cheek with his tongue at the way you snickered in response. “No, I’m not winning right now. Give me a few minutes, though.”

Admittedly, he was so attractive in his natural habitat, his fingers working fast against the keys of his keyboard. He had a certain look in his eyes when he was concentrated, you could stare at him for hours, not even caring about how long it would take for him to actually engage in conversation with you

“Stop staring,” he points a finger at you as he relaxes back into his chair after a match, cracking his knuckles. “You’re making me nervous.”

seungmin hits you up when he doesn’t feel like eating alone

Seungmin is another member that doesn’t really dig video calling or calling in general, he’d much rather text or just talk in person. Of course, things can’t go his way all of the time, so he settles with whatever can connect you to him

This time around, and the times before, facetime was the best option. He would always be out when he calls you, seated alone in a booth of a restaurant and in the middle of enjoying his meal. “What’s on the menu for today?” You’re anxious to see what he shows you this time, very interested in his choice. You give a thumbs up when he showcases a bowl of ramen, setting him up on a surface so you can get back to what you were doing

“I think I’ll just start bringing you out to eat with me,” he says before slurping up some noodles, carefully watching you through the screen for any type of reaction and satisfied when you nod in agreement. He always values alone time but he’s starting to realize that he doesn’t enjoy alone time when he’s eating. “I’ll pay, promise.”

“You don’t need to pay for me to go with you,” you laugh at his proposition, pleased enough that he’d even take you out with him. The way his first instinct to call you when he’s feeling a little lonely is very endearing, you’d be more than happy to keep him company whenever he feels that he needs it, that’s what you’re here for and vise versa

The two of you stay on the line for a while, having a nice and easy conversation as he finishes his food and while you work on personal projects. Sometimes it ends up being comfortable silence and sometimes you guys get caught up in really deep conversations, but it really doesn’t matter to either of you how the time is spent

jeongin calls when he’s conflicted and needs outfit opinions

The best way to open this is by saying that Jeongin’s closet is constantly growing. He has countless pieces of clothing, from tops to jackets to pants to accessories. It’s almost like playing dress up everytime he facetimes you, becoming his personal stylist and helping him out when he needs it

“I can’t figure out if the jeans or the shorts go better with the whole outfit,” he rambles, holding up both options to the camera for you to ponder. “Obviously, the jeans match the shirt better but I feel like the shorts match the entire look. Does that make sense?”

Usually, he isn’t a big talker, so times like these are times that you cherish because he could go on and on about what’s on his mind. Listening to his thought process out loud normally has you kicking your feet because he’s just so damn cute. You offer up a nod, still weighing the options in your head

“I think you should go with the shorts,” you give your final input, Jeongin immediately putting the pants back. He values your opinion more than anyone else in the world, so practically everything you say goes. If you think the shorts match the outfit better, then so does he. He isn’t typically swayed like this, but he knows that he’s in good hands if they’re yours

He gives you a big smile, picking up the phone before turning the camera, showing his entire look off in the mirror. “Definitely one of your best outfits yet. I better see the OOTD pics before anyone else, okay?”

#bang chan x reader #chan x reader #lee know x reader #minho x reader #changbin x reader #hyunjin x reader #han x reader #jisung x reader #felix x reader #seungmin x reader #jeongin x reader #i.n x reader #skz fluff #skz headcannons #skz x reader

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spotsandsocks · 1 year

Text

It's Such A Feeling

1.8k Explicit Read on AO3

Happy birthday @loveyourownsmiilee Ju Ju this one’s for you. Hope you have a lovely day 💜

Explict 1.8k Eddie’s got a thing about hands, well Buck’s hands that is. One day it all gets a bit too much to hide and it leads to confessions, kissing and making out on Eddie’s couch.

The older he gets the more Eddie’s learnt about himself. It’s great, things are better now than they’ve ever been, he’s more settled in himself, more him than he’s ever allowed himself to be. He knows what will make him happy, what he likes, what he doesn’t like. What he wants. Who he wants. Not that knowing is actually getting him anywhere but it’s a start.

Some of that learning has been painful but it’s been worth it. Some of what he’s found out has been a surprise, some not so much. Not really. One thing though has been particularly surprising; finding out that he can get all hot and bothered about something physical is new. He’s heard guys talk, especially when he was signed up, about the things that got them going, things they were attracted to and he never really got it. He’s always liked the whole package, who someone was not what they looked like.

That’s changed, now he gets it. It turns out he has a thing for hands. He hadn’t been expecting it. It had just kind of crept up on him. And if he’s going to be completely honest about it then it’s one particular set of hands doing it for him.

Buck’s hands specifically are driving him crazy. He has to watch them day in, day out doing all kinds of stupid mundane things and it’s making him want things. He’s watched them hold onto kitchen knives and chop and dice vegetables when he’s cooking yet another meal for him and Christopher. He’s watched them button and unbutton shirts in the locker room and in his living room when Buck stays the night on his couch. He’s watched, heart in his eyes when Buck holds out his arms and waggles his fingers at the children they’re rescuing who have gotten themselves stuck somewhere stupid. He’s tried not to get overwhelmed when he sees the same hands resting gently around his own son when Buck and Christopher hug each other tight.

He’s watched through lowered lashes as Buck reads, legs slung over the arm of the chair, one hand twisting a lock of hair round and round as the other one flicks through the pages of a book.

He’s even had dreams about them about what they could do to him, what they’d feel like trailing across his body, how they look wrapped around his cock, or Buck’s, or God help him both. Buck’s hands are big enough to do that. His dreams have involved Buck’s hands in his hair tugging hard holding him down as he takes Buck into his mouth and makes him moan.

He’s not proud of himself for indulging in those fantasies but he’s only human and he can’t control his dreams can he? It’s not his fault if Buck is, well, everything he never knew he wanted. But now he does know and dear God does he want.

He’s been fighting a valiant battle against the urge to hold onto those hands for so long but he’s about to lose the war. They’re just so..big. Competent. Warm. They look warm but he wants to know. He wants to know how they’d feel holding his.

Right now Buck's asleep on his couch and his hand is right there. It’s resting palm up in the space between them. A relatively small space all things considered, easy enough to cross if he was just a little braver. They’ve been watching television and it’s been sitting there for the last hour. Closer than anyone else’s hand ever gets. Does that mean something? He wants it to believe it does but he has to be sure. His fingers twitch but he has it under control despite Buck’s hands being a daily torture he’s still strong enough to resist. He makes a fist to stop himself reaching out and winding their fingers together and takes a deep slow breath.

“You can, you know.”

Eddie stops breathing. Buck continues.

“Hold my hand.” His voice is so soft, “If you want to.”

Buck twists his head, he’s still leaning back against the couch but his eyes are open and tilted up with such an open vulnerable expression. He really is beautiful, he takes Eddie’s breath away everyday.

“I want to hold yours all the time if that helps.”

Buck blinks up at him. Waiting.

“Eddie?”

He needs to say something so he says the first thing he thinks of;

“I love you.”

He hadn’t planned on saying that tonight but it’s the truth and he wouldn’t take it back if he could. His hand slides into Buck’s and he feels strong fingers close around his own.

Buck's lips are starting to curl into a tiny smile, he feels his own lips mirror him.

“You do?”

“Yeah, I really do.”

“Could you maybe kiss me then?” Buck shrugs the shoulder not pressed into the couch. “Because I love you back and your lips have been driving me crazy forever.”

Then Buck brings his free hand across his body and lightly brushes a finger across Eddie’s mouth. The sensation is new and quite remarkable.

“Absolutely crazy” Buck murmurs, his eyes tracking the movement of his finger.

Eddie wants to laugh, look at them both, missing all the signs, driving each other insane when they could have had this.

He has it now, Buck’s right here, warm and safe on his couch, looking at him with so much love in his eyes it makes his heart ache.

Suddenly it all feels so easy. Eddie catches hold of Buck’s finger as it teases his skin and kisses the tip, heart jolting at the contact. Buck’s pupils dilate and his breathing speeds up. God he loves him so much, wants to give him everything he has.

He slides Buck’s hand slowly downwards until it’s over his heart and holds it there for the two heartbeats it takes for him to lean in and press their lips together.

There’s a soft noise as Eddie moves his lips over Buck’s eager waiting mouth. He’s not sure who made it and he doesn’t care, he takes his time to enjoy the taste and feel of Buck and how his fingers, strong and sure, clench around the fabric of his T- shirt as the kiss deepens. The next noise he knows is from him but Buck echos it as the kiss becomes firmer, deeper, the soft wet warmth of Buck’s mouth is heady, everything he’s been longing for and more.

He finally pulls away, lips tingling, his body hot and alive in a way he’s unfamiliar with. He swings his leg over Buck so he’s sitting in his lap. Buck’s head swivels following his movement, keeping their eyes together the whole time, it’s intense and the look on Buck’s face is unmistakable.

He checks anyway. “This ok?”

When Buck nods breathless and wide eyed Eddie claims another kiss, this one quickly becomes dirtier than the first, harder, faster as his need for Buck builds. His hips move too, grinding against Buck which makes them both moan into the kisses. Buck's head falls backwards and he loses his mouth but compensates for that by latching onto Buck’s neck, nipping and sucking at the skin, drawing more breathless sounds from him and making him arch and press against him. Buck lets out a strangled ‘fuck’ as their hard and aching cocks rub together.

The slow steady grind continues until there’s nothing but heavy panting in the air, Eddie’s losing his mind and Buck’s not far behind him. They’ve both lost their tops somewhere Eddie doesn’t precisely recall when.

Buck’s been muttering a string of nonsensical sounds for a while under the onslaught of Eddie’s kisses, and Eddie finally knows what it feels like to have Buck’s hand trail across his body.

In a rush Buck moves, pushing himself upright. His hips shudder as once again they grind together, and Eddie can’t keep his eyes open any more, as the sensations roll through him.

“Eddie please I need..” he feels Buck’s hands at the button of his jeans and nods. He opens his eyes, this is something he wants to see, has dreamed of seeing. Buck’s competent hands make short work of his buttons and before he’s processed it his cock is being held in those same strong hands that’s he’s fantasied about. He can’t help himself he fucks up into Buck’s grip making his eyes roll and Buck groan.

“Fuck Eddie you’re so fucking hot.” Buck pumps him again and again. It’s so fucking good he sits there taking it mouth open gasping, eyes trained on what’s happening.

“You like watching me do it don’t you” Buck drags the words out.

Eddie nods “Love your hands.”

Then the other hand he loves so much cups his face and Eddie’s gifted Buck’s thick fingers to suck on. As two slide into his mouth and he makes a show of sucking them twirling his tongue and making Buck’s jaw drop and his hand stutter in its rhythm

“I fucking love your mouth.” Buck says then both hands are gone leaving Eddie empty and cold. He’s only abandoned for as long as it takes Buck to free his own cock and then Buck licks a long wet stripe down his palm and Eddie gets to see another of his dreams lived out as Buck’s stupidly large, wonderfully skilled hand takes hold of them both and strokes them together. He watches transfixed for as long as he can to the slow movement of Buck’s fist driving them both closer to the edge. Eventually the feeling is too much and thrusting up as Buck holds them together his head drops back, mouth open as he lets the feeling overwhelm him. Buck’s voice is there, encouraging him, there’s praise and instructions to fuck his fist, go harder, come for him. With wonderfully dirty words in his ear and Buck's hand driving him wild Eddie comes in a sharp burst of pleasure all over Buck’s fingers, which is all Buck needs to send him careening into his own climax and he joins him, a long shuddering cry on his lips before he collapses back on the couch.

Breathless and boneless Eddie collapses onto him and Buck tugs him into a tight hug.”I love you” is whispered in his ear. He’s rather out of breath still but he replies quickly “ I love you too.”

Buck finds a lost t-shirt and cleans then up as best he can but showers are needed eventually and they take turns each needing a moment of solitude to fully process what’s changed but there’s no confusion that Buck will be staying now, and in Eddie’s bed, where he belongs now, tomorrow and forever. He’s already there waiting on his side when Eddie comes out of the shower and climbs in to join him.

Buck’s hand is loose in the space between them, the sight brings a smile to his lips.

They lie facing each other. Buck’s softly smiling blue eyes hold his future in them.

“You can hold my hand anytime you want now, you know that right.”

Eddie nods, he does know that now. He reaches out and holds onto Buck’s hand and he never lets go.

Read on AO3

#911 fic #911fic #buddie #spotty scribbles #happy birthday juju #eddie diaz #evan buckley #buddie fic #911 fox #911 fanfiction #buddie fanfiction #eddie x buck

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temporalhiccup · 8 months

Note

🌤️

🌤️Share your favorite mechanic from a game you’re working on.

So @ostrichmonkey-games and I have been working on [a yet unnamed space pirates! game], which we're designing in the more narrative OSR space (discussing my understanding of OSR/NSR/etc is a whole other thing but anyway). Suffice to say we're having a lot of fun working out the machinery of emergent narratives! I wanted to create a way for the space pirates to be able to assert some control over how the exploration procedure, or basically how the crew travels the void tides. But I wanted to keep to the grungy-spooky-cool vibes Josh and I were aiming for. Also, I wanted to draw inspiration from one of Josh's cool little tool kits: Distant, Cold, and Beautiful.

We still need to playtest this a bunch but I'm happy with what I've wrangled together and Josh helped me work out the details. I had a lot of fun running a few simple tests between us too!

I'll run us through some excerpts, if you'll indulge me!

Ritual of Desire

When you wish to do more than follow the whims of the tides and instead wish to make demands of the Void instead, it is then time to perform the Ritual of Desire

The Ritual of Desire directly interacts with your crew position, one of the building components of your space pirate. So let's take a look at the Black Terror described as:

You may die with the Void filling your veins and pouring from your eyes, but until then your hair grows long and black with the Void and your voice will break any heart.

The leading space pirate has to spend a Whisper of the Void, and all pirates must sacrifice one Hit to the ritual. This grants a starting 1d20 to the ritual. Here are the Whispers from the Black Terror section:

A drunken story spun between two old hags

A blackened skull small enough to fit in the palm

A vision of a tentacled star beast consuming a station

Additional dice depends on what the Black Terror offers to the Ritual of Desire (different crew positions grant different dice, for different narrative costs):

1d12 - Burn away a love that keeps you steady

3d6 - Receive a fear deserved and compelling

So every space pirate makes the makes their offer for the dice for the ritual. So what do you do with all that dice once you've collected them? You cast them and seek out any of the following patterns:

The Twin Daggers of Levi - A pair of dice that show the same number (Reroll any of the Exploration die once, taking any result)

The Footsteps of Drowned Jack - Two sequential numbers (Mark a second location on the map)

The Three Sisters of Dreams Past - Three dice that show the same number (Move the results of the Exploration Die by one level)

The Four Star Crossed Lovers - Anything more than four dice showing the same number (Increase the tier of the results)

The Sea Wolf Howl - At least three dice of sequential numbers (Change the results of the Exploration Die to another type within the same tier)

The Path of Prophecy - At least four dice of sequential numbers (portal to the desire or something similar)

The God-Siblings of Chaos - If no patterns appear at all, declare exactly where you want to go. You will receive a request from the God-Siblings, and it must be fulfilled before the end of the next session. Once fulfilled, your ship and crew will be taken directly to your heart’s desire. Shirk the responsibility, and the Star-Killers will hunt you down.

And laaaaastly, I wanted to somehow incorporate the idea of younger and older stars too from Distant, Cold, and Beautiful.

The stars know when they are being watched, the ancient skies will look back and observe in turn, drawn to the bright light of hubris. Should the hungry stars be moved to entangle their light with yours, prepare yourself.

If any of the final Ritual Die is a 1-9: The younger of the stars observe you and send out a Whisper of the Void.

If any of the final Ritual Die is a 10-15: The older of the stars wish to interact with you directly, the crew will soon meet a Void Stranger.

If any of the final Ritual Die is a 16-20: The hungry stars turn their baleful eyes on you. The Keeper unlocks a Sinister Unscene.

Basically I wanted to mimic the feeling of casting runes, charm casting, and similar ideas. I also wanted to experiment with blurring the lines between play and procedure, meta and narrative. But! Most important! it's all for fun, and rolling different dice is always fun.

#asks #cjlinton #space pirates #design breakdown #ttrpg design #indie ttrpgs #sword queen games #ostrichmonkey games #together we go #osr

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crimsonhj · 10 months

Text

We Should Kiss Like Real People Do

Summary: It's Game Night at Cyno's house for the still-only friends 4ggravate crew, and Kaveh is making margaritas for their first round of Genius Invokation TCG. Yet, the alcohol keeps flowing, and by the third round of TCG, the air becomes a bit more charged with something other than competitiveness. (Author's Note at End)

Content: 2,417 words, rated mature, 4ggravate, Kaveh/Cyno/Tighnari/Alhaitham

CW: Drinking (until drunk), but read tags just in case

Crossposted on AO3

Kaveh rolled his eyes, his blush fading as he began to shake the margarita mix and tequila together, ice clinking inside the metal cup. He could feel everyone’s eyes on him as he poured a bit more tequila than necessary into it and shook it again before pouring it into the four glasses. Grudgingly, he took out the lime Cyno had sliced up and perched a slice on Alhaitham’s glass, just as he liked it.

“Alright you vultures, there you go,” he said, taking his and sipping from it. He hummed. He mixed it well.

Alhaitham gave him a leery look as if Kaveh might have poisoned his drink before taking a slow sip. He sat quietly for a moment before saying, “You can’t save money, but you can make a good margarita. Maybe you should quit being an architect and ask Diluc for a job.”

“And maybe you should get a job as a professional shit-talker,” Kaveh shot back. He wouldn’t lie and say he hadn’t considered doing architecture on the side, but when it came from Alhaitham’s mouth, it seemed utterly ridiculous.

“You’d make crazy money being a professional shit-talker,” Cyno piled on with a small smile. “You know, people pay to be degraded because they find it arousing. I bet you’d be good at that.”

Kaveh and Tighnari burst out laughing, and Alhaitham grumbled about how he’d never indulge strangers in such a lascivious way, looking down at his drink.

“Okay, okay,” Tighnari said around his laughter. “Game time, game time.” He slid off the counter, tail swinging back and forth and patting Alhaitham on the shoulder as he walked past.

They all followed him, Cyno flipping off the kitchen light as they settled around the dining room table.

Set-up went quickly, and soon, they were rolling the first dice of the game. By the second round, their glasses were empty, and Cyno brought out the spiked lemonade and straight vodka.

“You bastard,” Kaveh swore at Alhaitham as he officially killed his Nahida.

Alhaitham stared at him, gaze sharp yet slightly unfocused. “Play better then,” he replied.

“Ha!” Cyno yelled. He’d dealt enough damage to take Alhaitham’s Raiden down to 1. In victory, he downed a shot of vodka.

“Don’t celebrate, Cyno,” Tighnari said, cheeks flushed. He had stacked an artifact and dealt damage to all three of Cyno’s cards.

“You!”

Dice clattered across the table, and Kaveh felt a little unsteady, even sitting down as he finished his third spiked lemonade. Gods, he was going to be so hung over tomorrow. At least Cyno always let them spend the night.

The drunker he was, the less Alhaitham talked, and he was silent as he ended the last of Kaveh’s cards with a lazy swipe of his hand. Kaveh didn’t even know how much Alhaitham had drunk, but he didn’t care.

“How can you do that, Haitham?” Kaveh cried out, staring at his cards and then at Alhaitham’s two remaining. “It’s unfair you can’t be this good.”

“Yeah, you totally wrecked him,” Tighnari added, tapping on Kaveh’s Yoimiya. “You even got Yoimiya.”

“I’ll beat him, Kaveh, no worries,” Cyno said, eyes bright even as he missed the dice he grabbed for.

“It doesn’t matter, I lost!” Kaveh said and sat back, crossing his arms. “Again!”

“You talk too much for someone who always loses,” Alhaitham said. Kaveh was envious of his steadiness. Alhaitham always seemed to hold his liquor better than the rest of them, the only sign he was drunk was being quieter than usual and sleeping for way too long. “Shut up.”

“Make me.”

Alhaitham stood up and Kaveh scooted back in his seat, suddenly a little nervous.

“Uh oh,” Tighnari whispered, his ears drooped against his head from the alcohol.

Uh oh indeed, Kaveh thought as Alhaitham stalked over.

“Joking, Haitham, joking!” Kaveh exclaimed, holding his hands up in mock surrender. He scrambled out of his chair to put a few feet between him. He didn’t think Alhaitham would truly hurt him, but he had no clue what Alhaitham would do to make him shut up.

“Didn’t sound like a joke to me,” Alhaitham replied, closing the distance. His eyes glimmered, and Kaveh could smell the vodka mixed with Alhaitham’s cologne.

Before he could get him, Kaveh darted away, inserting himself between Tighnari and Cyno. He stumbled, catching himself on the back of Tighnari’s chair because his scrambled brain lied to him about where the floor was.

“I would stop running if I were you,” Cyno quipped, looking over Kaveh’s shoulder and leaning away. “I don’t think you’re getting out of this one, Kaveh.”

“No, no, I will not stop. I will not shut up until Alhaitham stops being a mean ass mmph–” Kaveh’s words were muffled as Alhaitham grabbed him and pulled him into a bruising kiss, Alhaitham’s hands clutching his face.

“Oh shit,” Tighnari said somewhere in the distance.

Kaveh didn’t breathe, didn’t even try to speak as the world practically dissolved around him. Alhaitham was so fucking mean, so ornery, but damn, them kissing felt so right, like a key sliding into your home’s front door lock. His lips tasted like the lime he’d sucked on and the peach vodka he kept at Cyno’s house to keep Kaveh out of it. Kaveh dug his fingers into the bunched-up fabric of Alhaitham’s white button-up, a small whimper leaving him.

With a quiet grunt, Alhaitham pulled away, shaking his head. “See, you shut up just fine,” he said and sat back down in his chair.

Kaveh blinked hard, drunk brain trying to catch up. Wordlessly, he sat down. He touched his lips and stared at Alhaitham. Was it merely to shut him up? An excuse?

Cyno and Tighnari shifted in their seats. Kaveh couldn’t tell if they were uncomfortable or…something else.

“So, what are you two waiting for? We have a game to finish,” Alhaitham muttered and rolled his dice. Cyno and Tighnari startled as if they were in a trance but nodded.

Still shocked, Kaveh got up and went into the kitchen. He poured himself a glass of water and sipped it, hoping to sober up. Alhaitham…kissed him. And fuck, if Kaveh said he didn’t want to kiss his stupid face again, he’d be a liar. From the dining room, he heard Tighnari lose his last card with a groan and his chair scrape across the wooden floor. Within a few seconds, Tighnari joined him in the kitchen with a quiet giggle.

“You know, Kaveh, Alhaitham might have had the right idea,” Tighnari said, leaning into Kaveh’s space. His ears flicked briefly up before drooping back down, his tail beginning to wag.

Absently, Kaveh petted Tighnari’s ears like he always did during their movie nights when Tighnari curled up between him and Cyno. “What do you mean?” he asked, not even thinking much of it as he nursed his glass of water.

“You can’t be that stupid from the alcohol,” Tighnari muttered, his tail wagging harder at Kaveh’s gentle hands on his ears. He grabbed the front of Kaveh’s shirt, pulled Kaveh to his height, and kissed him. Kaveh almost dropped his glass, fingers going limp at Tighnari’s insistent movements, pressing against him and nipping at his lips.

“Fuck,” Kaveh mumbled against Tighnari’s mouth, shakily setting down the glass before tangling his fingers in Tighnari’s hair. It felt similar to kissing Alhaitham but more passionate like Tighnari wanted to devour him. Gods he was fucked. Did friends do this? Kiss each other when they were drunk?

Tighnari pinned Kaveh to the counter, his feverishly hot hands beginning to slide under Kaveh’s shirt when they heard a shout of victory from Cyno. They jumped apart as if burned, Tighnari panting and Kaveh dazed.

Before they could even recover, Cyno bounded into the kitchen, practically singing. “See told you I would win, Kaveh!” Cyno crowed and ruffled Kaveh’s hair, seemingly oblivious to his and Tighnari’s states. Cyno picked up Kaveh’s glass and downed the water. Alhaitham wandered in, eyes sticking to Kaveh immediately.

Kaveh felt his face turn redder. Alhaitham looked…odd.

“Alright, alright, movie time!” Cyno said, wrapping an arm around Kaveh and Tighnari’s shoulders and dragging them into the living room, past the dining table with their abandoned cards and glasses. Kaveh stumbled over his feet, grabbing onto Cyno’s waist to stop himself from smashing his face on the floor. They were practically thrown on the couch, Alhaitham calmly following after and sitting much closer than usual to Kaveh.

“We’re watching Spiderman,” Cyno continued. “Into the Spiderverse.”

“Well, I’m laying down,” Tighnari mumbled, laying across their three laps as if it was nothing. And it was, for the most part. Tighnari did often lay across their laps during movie night but never drunk and never with three out of the four of them so…tense.

Kaveh watched as Cyno’s hand crept possessively into Tighnari’s hair, petting his ears as the opening credits rolled. And Alhaitham, usually not touchy, laid his hand on Tighnari’s calf. Kaveh rested his hands on Tighnari’s hip, unsure of what else to do because Tighnari usually had his head in Kaveh’s lap.

Ten minutes passed, and Kaveh could feel Alhaitham’s free hand sneaking into his hair, stroking softly. It was heartbreakingly tender, enough so that Kaveh wondered if the universe really had come up with nicer clones of people and had replaced Alhaitham at some point in the night. He wouldn’t say anything. He didn’t dare to possibly break the moment hanging between all of them. Instead, Kaveh closed his eyes and rested his head on Alhaitham’s shoulder. If his roommate was going to be nice, he would take advantage of every second of it.

Rough fingers brushed against his cheek, bringing with them the woody scent of bergamot and amber wood. Cyno. They traced over his cheek, over his lips, then across his jawline, as if he was trying to map Kaveh’s face.

With the weight of Tighnari in his lap and Cyno and Alhaitham touching him, Kaveh thought that it was something like heaven, the heaven he dreamed about when he hugged a pillow to sleep at night. His body felt heavy and slow as he drifted off, this moment seared into his memories.

A/N: Okay y'all, don't kill me. This is my first ever Genshin fic, and to be honest, I'm only AR 27 so I have not gotten to Sumeru like...at all. These four have been rotting my brain even before I started playing, but since I genuinely haven't had any in-game interactions with them, I've only begun to get an idea of their characterization and their dynamics from other fans (and reading the Wiki). So, I am open to constructive criticism for their characterization and dynamics! I do intend to continue this as a series, so feedback is really important.

Title from "Like Real People Do" by Hozier

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ereflowere · 11 months

Text

tbh Kokichi + DICE brainworms can't leave my head cause I really believe that Kokichi around DICE is him at his best. It's him with people who willingly support and follow him, knows him well enough to trust him in spite of his lies, and idk I always have this sense that some of the DICE members knew Kokichi before like, whatever happened that made him tell Kaito that they're different people/people you trust backstab you and all that. Like they knew Kokichi before he became the supreme leader. They /made/ Kokichi their Supreme Leader (im projecting Phantom Troupe+Kuroro/8 Generals+Sinbad so damn hard on DICE+Kokichi smh). The Kokichi they know is the Kokichi of ch 1-3 where yes he's a lying sack of shit, but is mostly a harmless nuisance and says shit you don't want to hear to you to genuinely help you.

And then comes the Kokichi of ch 4. Someone nobody trusted. Someone isolated. He wasn't supposed to be like this. He was supposed to have people who trust him and understand him in spite of his antics and are willing to work with him at all times. And then he got the damn key card and found out that DICE is dead. And then the person he's been working the most closely with on his plan to get the hell out plans to murder him.

Like hot take? I think Kokichi's used to being trusted. It feels super contradictory with the fact that he's a liar but I think that all 9 DICE members are so used to his bullshit that they couldn't care less about what he said and rides or dies with him either way. And so I honestly think that knowing that the 9 people who trusted him is dead, and then realising that the person he's literally asking to draft anti-monokuma anarchy weapons does not give a shit about his plan, probably snapped something in him and convinced him that he can't take trust for granted anymore in this game. He have to get in people's head and exploit their weaknesses. He has to honest to god manipulate them.

THUS!!!!! (flips open my whiteboard) is my DICE-and-Momota-kinda-gets along agend-- /JOKES i'm kidding i just really like DICE & Kokichi but I genuinely think DICE will have some respect for Kaito for trusting in Kokichi's plan. I love the hc that postgame Kaito wakes up earlier than Kokichi and takes turns w/ some of the DICE members to look after Kokichi before he wakes up and when he stabilises they all pulled one super elaborate prank on him as a welcome gift. (this is the peak of my self-indulgence)

#i realise that my interpretation of kokichi tends to be very sympathetic #which is not accurate at all but i think its really just because #i think about DICE all the damn time #and like this guy has to do something right if he can get 9 people to be honestly loyal to him #and like it's not one sided!! Kokichi also thinks DICE is the most impt ppl in his life!!#sometimes i completely ignore 'DICE is fictional' HCs or make up other HCs like 'DICE is Kokichi's MMORPG guild members' cause #you cant give me found family morally questionable anti hero troupe and not expect me to eat it up #sideeyes hxh phantom troupe #sideeyes magi 8 generals

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metalhead-brainrot · 4 months

Text

[Album of the day] World Eaters - Demo MK-1

Guelph, ON // 2020

[Genres] death metal, war metal

[Themes] In the grim darkness of the far future, there are only riffs...

[FFO] Warhammer 40K*, Bolt Thrower, Chainsword

[Thoughts] You can't traverse the waters of death metal for very long without encountering Warhammer 40K in some form, and I'll confess I count myself a fan.** But you don't need to be a capital-G Gamer to appreciate this ripping demo, a solo project from multi-instrumentalist David Gupta. World Eaters's riffs are as violent as its namesake***, guaranteed to have you itching for the mosh pit. The first two tracks, "Devour" and "Baneblade," will pummel you with energetic rhythm, an auditory siege culminating in the death/doom hellscape of "The Warp" (my very favorite World Eaters song to date).

I picked this demo because I think it's rock-solid, but I'd like to talk about World Eaters's other releases as well. Grinding Advance (2021) is their second EP, doubling down on everything in Demo MK-1. "Armoured Spearhead (Hellhammer)" is six minutes of unbridled energy; "Expedition / Tomb World" is nearly nine minutes, the latter half containing clarinet-infused Nile worship;**** there's even a cover of "Running Up That Hill."

World Eaters's new split, Mothman and the Thunderbirds vs World Eaters, adds two new great tracks to the WE catalogue. It's also the first release without drum programming; joining as the second permanent member, Winter Stomp***** adds ass-kicking blast beats to the bands repertoire. I'm very excited to see more future releases with her style.

Now that Winter Stomp has pledged her gory chainaxe to the sonic blitzkrieg of the World Eaters, the duo have been able to play live. Living outside Ontario I can't say I've been to one of their concerts, but I bet they split skulls; if you live near Guelph, check them out.

Also, I would be remiss for not mentioning that World Eaters has always been very charitable with the profits from their music, leading several donation campaigns for Guelph Pride, an LGBTQ+ nonprofit local to World Eaters's hometown. Winter Stomp has also designed and printed some booty short merch reading, "Be Gay Do Heresy," which tempt me every Bandcamp Friday.******

Thanks for reading the long post today. Keep on killing, maiming, and burning.

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* If you're unfamiliar, Warhammer 40K is a popular tabletop strategy game played with painted miniatures and rolling dice. It's popular with metalheads because the lore is so metal. Indulge me in a quick tl;dr.

It's the 41st century, and the Imperium of Man has spread through the Galaxy under the tutelage of the God Emperor. Though once great, the empire was split 10,000 years prior due to infighting from his übermensch sons, the Primarchs. Now the empire is spread thin across too many star systems, losing the fight against three main threats: the Xenos (other alien civilizations), the Heretics (those who question the authority of a fascist theocracy), and Chaos itself (arcane beings from the Warp, the non-space between wormholes).

The God Emperor sits as a corpse upon his throne on Terra, every ounce of his psychic abilities maintaining the Astronomican, a beacon guiding spaceships throughout the Warp. Every day an increasing number of psychics are sacrificed to fuel his powers, for if the beacon fails, the Imperium collapses and humanity falls.

There are no good guys, and there is no hope. For in the grim darkness of the far future, there is only war.

** Never actually played anything Games Workshop except Necromunda, though I've read a fair few novels. I prefer wargames that won't bleed me for money and bury me in rules, so I mainly play Mantic Games's Kings of War and Firefight. One book for all the rules and force lists at a fraction of the price.

*** The World Eaters are a faction of heretical Space Marines worshipping one of the four Chaos Gods: Khorne, the Blood God, who sits upon a throne made from the skulls of those slain in battle. They are also my favorite faction; he kind of has a Conan-esque backstory of fighting in gladiatorial slave pits. And we all know how much metalheads like Conan.

**** The Egyptian musical themes are themselves referential to the content of the song: Tomb Worlds are the hidden domains of the Necrons, a xenos race that conquered the Galaxy aeons before humanity even gazed at the stars. Annoyed by the emergence of other upstart civilizations, the Dynasties of the Infinite Empire transferred their consciousnesses into mechanical bodies, intending to slumber in hidden tombs until the juvenile races extinguished themselves.

But occasionally something wakes the soulless early, by delving too deep in ancient ruins or experimenting with ancient and unknown tech. And what they find is always ruthless extermination, for the destruction of a Necron's artificial body does not kill a mind capable respawning eternally into an army's worth of mechanical warriors.

***** She's apparently from the Netherlands. Neat.

****** I already have one of their patches on my metal jacket. Very stylish.

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[From the band/label]

Thought for the day: A coward always seeks compromise.

David Gupta: Guitars, Bass, Vocals, Drum Programming Psychic screams from the Immaterium are: Adam Ujhelyi (Teleportise, Hellbreather) Justin Krawczyk (Frank Reynolds, BatBoy) Derek Prince-Cox (Wakeless, Yuzun, ex-Arise and Ruin) Stuart Charlton (First World Famine, Inverted Serpent) Nik Wever (ex-The Story Of..., Time the Destroyer) Recorded, Mixed and, "Mastered" by David Gupta at Doyle House. World Eaters logo and Demo MK-1 artwork by Meytheus Rexy, @meytheusrexy_art

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professorspork · 11 months

Note

Any chance you'd actually want to do a breakdown of the writing and literary techniques you used in Newsbees? Any excerpt of your choice honestly, I'm always curious about how other writers think about their own work

A) I just want to say that what truly delights me is that this hit my inbox last night, a full 12 hours before the epilogue was posted (and contained within it a request for asks just like this). Way to read my mind! It made me happy!

B) Oh gosh this is so broad WHAT SHOULD I TALK ABOUT

okay after much dithering, using an online dice-rolling tool to pick a chapter to talk about and then being like 'this tool didn't pick the right chapter' I am going to talk about chapter 12, aka the romance novel bed-sharing one right before everything goes to shit.

Before we begin, you'll note that I still insist on calling a wolf at your door chapter 12 even though on AO3 it's chapter 13. I get why for coding reasons AO3 probably can't support calling a prologue "chapter zero" because something like 0/21+ is not a helpful chapter count in the same way 1/23 is but still the discrepancy chafes and I'm glad people have mostly indulged me on this point.

ANYWAY

Firstly, I'll point out that the chapter bears all of the usual hallmarks of what I know defines my prose and which I lean into with some degree of purpose. To pick a portion from the section on Blake's panic attack as an example:

She sinks shakily to the tile and curls into a ball to cry. After hours of gripping onto what remained of her sense with white-knuckled desperation, forcing herself to at least dissociate long enough to find a place to get out of the storm, she can’t fight it any more. Every single emotion she’s been barely keeping at bay—the powerlessness, the fear, the self-hatred, the sorrow—crashes through her all at once, bulldozing the fragile internal structures she’d relied upon to stay upright until there’s nothing inside her but splinters and wreckage.

It’s over. It’s over.

Gods, why won’t she fucking stop crying?

She bites down on her fist—anything to quiet the violent, hiccuping sobs that are wracking her lungs and depriving her of much-needed air—but it’s no use. You’ll wake everyone up, shut up, shut up, you stupid, sloppy bitch shut up.

Inane. Infantile.

Pathetic.

She has no idea how long she stays there, blubbering on the shower floor like a toddler. Time stretches like taffy, malleable and meaningless. She weeps until she’s empty; until even the derogatory, incisive shame is gone and only her hollow husk is left. And then…

…ever so slowly…

…cognizance creeps back in.

Apparently, she’s shivering.

The air in Yang’s apartment, which had felt near-stifling upon Blake’s arrival, is now crisp and biting against her clammy skin.

Gee, can you tell I like alliteration? In just this singular 226-word excerpt, there are eight uses of it (sinks/shakily; stupid/sloppy; inane/infantile; time/taffy; malleable/meaningless; hollow/husk; cognizance/creeps; crisp/clammy)-- and that number goes up, even, if you count incidental usage like 'with white-knuckled' or 'been barely.'

As I've matured as a writer I've shied away from prose that's florid just for prettiness' sake, but I do still indulge in this sort of... lyrical, tone-poem narration, especially in moments of great introspection or emotional import, as Blake's breakdown certainly is. All my writing-- not just dialogue-- is something I both hear and listen for, and the cadence and rhythm of the sentences is something I will tweak over and over and over again throughout the editing process until I'm satisfied with its flows and eddies. This is why I'll often use entirely unnecessary em-dashes to indicate breaths and pauses; to me, that sort of mouthfeel of the phrasing is just as important as the vocabulary is. Alliteration is a great way to get at that sort of smooth, elevated and heightened affect without being too conspicuous; my hope is that no one actually noticed "jesus christ there are eight alliterative pairs in this one half-page's worth of writing" until I pointed it out. It's... a flavor, a seasoning, that provides a bit of lift.

This excerpt also provides a few examples of another favorite thing of mine, which is pairing TWO adjectives for specificity's sake (and that sort of breathing meter). Blake's sobs could have been violent or hiccuping instead of both, but using both gives their brutality and physical embodiment emphasis; time being both malleable and meaningless shows two different facets of the sort of warping she's experiencing; her shame being both derogatory and incisive gets at how it hits both emotionally/verbally and internally/physically. (That's twice there I've said how I want the words to feel physical, to put you in Blake's shoes, and that's also very much a hallmark of my writing and this work specifically. There's a reason Blake throws up or nearly throws up so many times in this story, including in this chapter. I wanted her anxiety to feel LIVED IN, this toxic thing that her body literally has to reject and expel any way it can.)

The last thing this excerpt has that I want to remark upon is an incredibly considered simile-- how Blake's panic attack "crashes through her all at once, bulldozing the fragile internal structures she’d relied upon to stay upright until there’s nothing inside her but splinters and wreckage." I think it's always a worthwhile project to come up with metaphors that haven't been used a thousand times, because readers deserve novelty and forethought, but I really considered how I wanted to portray her feelings here. In other chapters, I compare Blake's panic/trauma to a treacherous ocean filled with dangerous creatures, or to a runaway train; Yang, of course, gets her big moment where she feels like a volcano. All of these things are scary and unpleasant, but they are so in radically different ways. Whereas the ocean metaphor is sort of all about depth and playing the long game, getting dragged under and the process of erosion, I wanted this one to be sudden and impactful. The first thing I came up with was a tornado, but that a) felt a little tired to me and b) still came from the natural world, which didn't feel quite right. The sort of manmade, architectural language I ended up going with reinforced far better the point I was making: that Blake built and constructed her sense of calm purposefully, and it was now being torn down by someone else's violent efforts.

PHEW okay I think that's enough talking about that one small section.

Overall, the chapter also contains a lot of the sorts of tricks and modes I relied on throughout the fic-- playing around with time, explicitly referencing callbacks to earlier in the story, the Adam that lives in Blake's head. This chapter is also, of course, the debut of The Font, which was really fun for me. Blake falling asleep instantly in Yang's bed after two dozen chapters of how bad her insomnia is was a payoff that had been in the outline from the earliest stages. The Hug is both important in its own right but also a reference to yet another musical, Waitress ("I hope someday, somebody wants to hold you for twenty minutes straight..."). Seeing as this is a Newsies adaptation, I wanted it to feel in many ways LIKE A MUSICAL-- to have those big, bold feelings-- but the one thing Newsies isn't is a romance, and I found myself thinking often of love songs from other shows to sort of fill in those gaps. That could honestly be its own post so I won't get into it more now, lol.

OKAY MY GOODNESS THIS IS GETTING LONG I'M GONNA CUT IT OFF THERE. But I hope that was interesting for folks, and if so PLEASE ASK ME MORE QUESTIONS I LOVE QUESTIONS.

#newsbees au #fic what i wrote #rwby

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discipulusmaleficus · 8 months

Text

last year of schooling.

JUST ANOTHER INSECT (EVERY BUG IS MANY BUGS) -- SENSELESS EATEN-OUT MAGGOT-RIDDEN CORPSE, WALKING -- ANIMATE VIA IT IT'S NOT IT IT IS AND IT ISN'T BUT IT'S A START IT'S A MEANS TO AN END // HOW MANY LOCI? MORE THAN V. VIII or XVI (optimism, unfounded) // YOU WILL NOT LOOK UP AROUND THROUGH YOU WILL NOT SEE THE BARS OF YOUR CAGE SKIN MIND -- YOU CANNOT AS YOU DO NOT WANT TO (YOU ARE IT -- IT DOES NOT -- IT IS THE LACK OF WANTING?) // YOU WILL NOT SEE THE BEAUTY OF THE UNSPOOLING WILL NOT SEE THAT IT IS ALL ONE BUG AND THAT BUG NEEDS TO DIE TWITCHING. AND BLOODY FUCKING DEATH BE TO AMUN-RA // I WISH YOU WOULD TRY. PLEASE TRY. PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PL I CAN'T BE THE ONLY

✶ ✶ ✶ ✶

It started -- well, perhaps it started the very first time he was ushered into the Temple of the Seething God, that sensation of the walls closing in around him in the flickering candlelight, that half-real feeling of insects buzzing even in the space where they weren't. The indulgent smile of the disciple as flies gathered on the cloth of Kal's robes.

Or maybe it was the night he spent laying awake assessing his chances of -- daydreaming about -- running away before he was shipped off to the Academy the next morning. Or the day he spent six hours sitting motionless in the snow because Auntie Mel said so. Or that moment scarcely hours after he was born when his mother snapped that they should simply throw him into the ceremonial bonfire.

From the outside, though, the day the cracks showed was a few months into his senior year. He had caught the scent of something happening that night -- could have been a party, could have been a mysterious ritual -- in the basement of the better girls-only dorm. It was, as it turned out, a summoning he was crashing. Fun times.

The wrong word was said. All the dice came facing up one. The inner blast radius took out almost everyone who was actually participating nigh-instantly, and doomed the building to the concerned efforts of construction crews for months to come. But there was something in the interplay of light between world and not-world that left Kal walking, nay, sprinting, right towards the thing that had swallowed his classmates with such slow, agonising grace. The dust began to fall almost immediately.

He will remember somebody's arms grabbing hold of him before he makes it. He will remember the feeling of insects crawling through his skin. He will remember himself hissing and spitting and making garbled explanations, and he will remember continuing for some time after he comes out of sedation.

✶ ✶ ✶ ✶

Maybe it was that bright, too-hot day when he came out of the teleportational veil embedded in the chest of what-the-fuck-was-her-name, you killed her how can you not remember. Or the day after he saw we saw, when he went shivering back into class and the professor said they should already be thinking about the exams at the end of the school year. About their future.

Future, his brain echoed, and the concept didn’t sit right.

✶ ✶ ✶ ✶

In the next few months, he would skip class often – this was not entirely unusual, and he was slapped on the wrist time and again, of the Zorabi line, pedigreed to hell and back. He was confident certain staff members held debts that made him difficult to touch.

He would spend this time off from studying magic studying magic, trying to recreate the failure of a ritual he'd glimpsed before.

SUCCESS. He would even have the wherewithal not to leap into the miniature tear he creates in reality, this time. He would simply sit and stare into it, for some hours, motionless save for the wringing of his hands.

✶ ✶ ✶ ✶

"That's my wine, you know," said his roommate. Phil Segwern was a lithe but well-made young man, blond, Kal suspected with a good amount of Elvish heritage. He was royalty by distant relation and had a harpoon gun hung up on the wall above his bed. They had only woken up naked together the once, and the fellow was very pointed about it being an anomaly. "I expect you to pay me back. In installments."

Kal was more interested in taking another swig of the wine, and in gesturing at the scribbled notes and vandalised library books now caking the floor. "I could use a second eye on this, actually."

Stony, resigned sigh. Segwern stepped up, squinted at the indecipherable hand writing. "What's this for, again? Was this the, uh, Alchemical Transm --?"

"I'm killing God."

Pause.

"The local minister, anyway."

"Go to bed, Oakheart."

(Kalmar would not go to bed.)

✶ ✶ ✶ ✶

"I can show you," said Kal for the hundredth time, easy smile painted on his face, waving the blood-spattered diagram clamped in one ringed hand. "Properly. Past the, ah, the mouth of the…"

He felt dizzy.

The freshman had already walked off. No spark of recognition in their eyes, only -- 'what the fuck'.

JUST ANOTHER INSECT.

✶ ✶ ✶ ✶

He was still taking service with the Seething God, more's the pity. The priests had made a point of how fond 'xe' seemed of him, and besides, his Aunt had seemed glad he was pursuing it.

Free grades for some hemoglobin and a penitent attitude.

It wasn't hard to act like he was being drawn into the fold, considering Higher Service. Not hard to arrange a meeting with the core of the entity, to strike where it was purest and most vulnerable.

The idea, not that his plan would have sounded anything like this if he'd tried to find the words, was to siphon all its energy through himself, rearrange it into a series of rifts dramatic enough to set the whole facility imploding and crashing into the desert hundreds of kilometres below. He knew that this would likely dissolve him, clung in an irrational way to the notion that he would only come out the other side improved.

And the process worked, almost. The power sparked and spasmed through his veins, made everything around him seem small and cardboard and insignificant, and he knew that he would do it, unravel the world around him bit by bit until the illusory boundaries between all things had dissolved and they were all finally fucking free --

✶ ✶ ✶ ✶

He was incorrect about this.

The world outside the Academy, as it happened, was a hell of a lot more worth actually living in.

#not editing this. eternal WIP.#just tryna make myself flesh things out.#while h@rrow the ninth seeps into my brain.#hc #?#I don't even have a drabble tag lmao #abuse cw #ask to tag

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lake-archive · 5 months

Text

You Like Me

AO3 Link - Fling Posse Selfship / Yumeship Masterlist

Fandom: Hypnosis Mic

Characters: Ann Wolff (OC), Ramuda Amemura, Dice Arisugawa

Pairing: Ramuann (Ramuda/Ann)

Summary: When it comes to noticing if someone is in love or not, Ramuda is no fool. So he decides to finally call Ann out…

Tags: Love Confessions, Established Relationship, Falling In Love, Declarations Of Love, Romance, Romantic Fluff, Amemura Ramuda-centric, POV Amemura Ramuda, Mentioned Arisugawa Dice, Gender-Neutral Pronouns, Genderqueer Character, Genderqueer, Confessions, Original Character(s), Major Original Character(s), POV Third Person, POV Third Person Limited, OC x Canon, S/I x Canon

Technically this is a later part. However, due to personal reasons and having very self indulgent ideas (which will not be part of the main stories), I already wrote it. I will add it to the CATZ Masterlist once it is time though. I do not want to disturb the order and flow of the story (as it is a jump atm). However, just know that this already exists.

Whenever asked one question the answer was always the same. Ramuda had overheard it several times, merely by chance and honestly… It was getting a little tiring to hear. It’s not as if he didn’t know better, he knew more than well that the answer given was always a lie… Well, it wasn’t as obvious as Gentaro’s but he always said it shortly after. No, Ramuda just… Knew. Then again, the person in question was a god awful liar, they wouldn’t even need to add that sentence to make it obvious that they were lying through their teeth. That blush said it all, let alone them being so hesitant, not to mention how stuttery and flustered they got each time. You would have to be a literal fool to not notice, or blind. Or a massive idiot. It was impossible to overlook… In fact that would be the only type of bet Dice would win. Speaking of Dice, it was thanks to him that Ramuda got confirmation that his hunch was correct, right at this moment…

“Yo Ann, what’cha doin’ here?” The man had asked shortly after having entered the studio of the fashion designer, this one not denying slight annoyance perhaps yet he did not necessarily mind in the end.

“Arisugawa–San? Were you invited too?” They asked shortly after having heard Dice, tilting their head slightly in confusion.

“Me? Nah, didn’t hear a word from Ramuda. Just bein’ here for the usual.”

“Which means begging for money to gamble away?”

“Oh you’re sooo right ‘bout that! Actually, ya got some too?”

“How about you pay those back you owe before I let you borrow any of my money.” They retorted, sounding so cold and sharp at that moment. “Then again, given your track record…”

“C’mon! Won’t help one of the dudes out here?” He asked, though having become visibly nervous despite that smile. “Please?”

“Forget it. Besides, I can’t afford it either.”

“Stingy…”

“Haha, Ann–Chan shot you down again~” Ramuda decided to finally throw in, having listened to this for a long enough time. It was always hilarious. Despite telling him ‘no’ so many times he was always asking them again and again. Dice sure never knew when to give up and it was almost amusing to look at. No, it was very funny to listen to and never got old, not really at least.

“You make it sound as if I got rejected…” Dice countered for a moment, a bit in disbelief.

“I mean, they kinda did.”

“Shut it!” A quick scoff yet the mood of the man quickly changed, going back into his usual begging demeanor, even clapping his hands together and bowing a little forward. “Anyway Ramuda! Please, lend me some cash! I’m broke!”

“Eh? But I just lent you some money…” The pink haired guy responded, not sure what else to expect. It was tempting to give Dice what he asked for just for him to leave but… He still wants the amount he is owed back. This was tough, may as well be put on the spot while at it…

“Please! I’ll win and pay ya back double!”

“You said that last time too…”

“Ah! Th… This time for sure! I’ve got a good feeling!”

“Maybe you should just get an actual job instead and earn money…” Ann threw in, perhaps unable to take in the sight any longer… Judging from their face, it might have been that.

“Easy for ya to say Misster Student.”

“Missister?”

“Listen, last time I said ‘Miss Student’ ya whacked the shit outta me. So how ‘bout that?”

“I— Hah, nevermind. Either way, you should consider, you know.”

A nod from Ramuda.

“Eh, no need. Anyway please! I’ll be outta your hair and won’t disturb your date any longer!” He was… Desperate. However, Dice would only make things worse for himself the moment he said ‘date’. Why? Well, it may as well have been that. Ramuda had no intention to talk to anyone else right now and just wanted to be alone with them, maybe dwell on some old memories again. It was just so much fun honestly and Ann would always listen. Conversing with them over tea turned out to be more fun than he had ever expected. However, as for them…

They stood up in one go, their face as red as a stoplight while glaring at Dice, as if having just been called out. They had suddenly become defensive after all, as if called out. “Date!? This… Is not that!” They even added, as if trying to hide something.

It made the gambling addict in the room flinch, almost falling over from the mere rise of the voice alone. His eyes went wide fairly quickly on top of that. “Woha! Ann!? Wha—”

“Th…There’s a difference between a conversation and a date you know! A clear difference! This is nothing like a date, at all! I wouldn’t be interested in the first place if that’s what you’re suggesting! This is seriously nothing like—”

“Calm down, I was joking!” Dice was trying so hard to get them to calm down and yet they just kept coming up with excuse after excuse, getting a little too much into it. While the first few seconds were funny it soon became a little annoying. Talk about trying too hard… It even made Ramuda sigh and drop his usual cheerful facade, only looking at the scene in annoyance. Yeah, a terrible liar, as always. And dense too… That or they were in denial. Then again, both did not get the hint… That he wanted to be alone with Ann. Looks like he had to set the record straight. First that would mean—

“Alright, I’ll make one exception~” Ramuda interrupted the tangent in a moment, quickly switching to his usual smile for a moment and getting up. This silenced both parties for a good moment, turning to him instead. “How much do you need Dice? I’ll lend it to you~”

Honestly, he didn’t want to but if it got Dice away, then so be it. And it had gone rather quickly, Ramuda borrowed the asked amount and Dice was on his merry way. Shortly after he plopped back onto the couch, sighing. The brunette had just been staring at him in slight disbelief when slowly getting seated, about to ask what had gotten into Ramuda perhaps yet he did not allow them to speak up. Instead he lowered his voice for this moment, then looked at them with a slightly sharp gaze while asking: “Any reason for you to lie?”

“Lie?” They asked, tilting their head for a short moment. “Wh.. What are you—”

“Ok, maybe you’re just a bit dense. Fair.” He decided to respond, not having the energy to sugarcoat his actual thought for the moment. “This falls under a date.”

“E… Excuse me?” They said, the faint red still visible and their body starting to shake. “Ramuda, this… Should not be a jo–”

“Am I laughing?”

They took a close look and…. Well… The conclusion was obvious, even for them. “You’re dead serious, aren’t you?”

“At least you understand that much.” He nodded, his gaze never leaving theirs. “I still don’t know why you had to lie though.”

“Again, what do you mean by me lying? I don’t—”

“You know, if you’re in love with me, you can just say it.” He interrupted, getting straight to the point. He was tired of playing games, having to pretend as if he didn’t know… He knew, for a good while now. Or at least had a hunch. Yet he had to pretend as if he didn’t and that was tiring. Why couldn’t they just come out with it? It wasn’t that hard. And he was about to show them how easy it is, especially when being aware that your feelings are reciprocated.

And yet, they would still be in denial, at least for this short moment. “I… In love!?” They repeated, jumping in their seat for a second. “Wh… What are you saying? I—”

As they were speaking he got up from his seat, no longer wanting to hear any of this. Instead he walked closer to theirs before leaning forward, grabbing onto the armrests of their seat and getting his face awfully close to theirs, as if wanting to look dead into their eyes. Well, that was the true. Besides, getting his face so close shut them up in a second, their face flushing red yet again and them trying not to look at his face, turning it slightly sideways and looking down.

“R… Ramuda… What—”

“Look at me, will you?” He said while suddenly grabbing their cheeks and turning them back to him so they just had to face him. And the longer they had to, the more they seemed to lose their ability to speak. Or at least form straight sentences. Not like it mattered to him though. “I know what’s going on. So can you stop acting like a stubborn brat already?”

“Eh!? I… Erm…”

“Your constant denial is goddamn tiring. If you like me, just say it. Everyone caught on with this nonsense of yours.”

“N… Nonse—”

“It’s not that hard to say it you know.” He interrupted, not tolerating any excuse whatsoever. “In fact, let me show you. Now.”

“Show!? Wha—”

“Ann, I love you.”

It was one sentence. One very simple sentence he just said out loud. It wasn’t so hard… Well, he made it look easy, maybe it was a little embarrassing and the chance of some heart beating was there. He kinda felt it… But he felt at ease all the same. Was it their presence or was it because he knew they would not reject him? No, it was both. There was a reason why he had started to fall for them to begin with. After all, it was not common that someone made him feel at ease, safe even… Let alone being able to open up like this and not freak out when he switched expressions almost on a whim. It was refreshing and he didn’t really see any reason to not be drawn to them. Well, or rather, there was more reason to feel drawn to them than not feeling drawn to them. He couldn’t put it into words, but do you have to put such a feeling into words? He knew what he wanted, who he wanted and how he felt. That was all that should matter. And he is not going to pretend any longer… No more games, no more running. Besides… The quicker this was dealt with the better… Who knows how long both of them would have left.

“Wh… Wha— Hah!? Wait a second… Tha—”

“Don’t tell me you seriously didn’t notice?” He asked them, staring somewhat blankly at them.

They flinched yet nodded shortly after, a little ashamed.

This was met with him looking a little annoyed at them before squishing their cheeks a little, not in a harmful manner but a little tightly. “You’re really an idiot, aren’t you?” Before finally letting go, his hands trailing back downwards onto the armrests yet his gaze not turning away from theirs.

“C… Come on! What was I supposed to think!? Y… You just hug about anyone sometimes!” They countered, making his gaze become a little sharper.

“Why do you think I invite you over so many times? When it’s just the two of us?”

“To… Talk about… Things? You know, just talk.”

“Seriously? You thought this was just about talking?”

“Y… Yeah…”

He only stared at them blankly, very blankly. This was— “Ann, you can’t be serious right now.”

“I… Kinda am.”

“You’re an idiot sometimes.”

“Sorry for not wanting to jump to conclusions.” They pouted for a moment, one of the cheeks puffing up. “Besides, someone like you, being interested in some nobody?”

“Ey, no talking like that!” He countered before suddenly something switched. Besides, he had the urge for quite some time now, ever since having gotten so close. Thus he hugged them from one moment to the next, allowing himself to be buried into their chest while clinging onto them rather tightly, almost nuzzling against them even. His voice had become a little higher as well it seemed, the higher pitch slowly coming back. “I won’t tolerate that! Especially not from my partner!”

“Eh!? Wait wait wait, I didn’t agree–”

“Well, do you have any reason to refuse?” He asked, almost sounding rather childish yet again, just as before. All because he was more than certain of his victory. No, not certain, it was a mere guarantee.

“I… I… I… guess not…”

“Hehe, there we go. I knew you’d come around if I push it~” He responded, sounding more chirpy now. “But but, you still have to say something you know.”

“Eh!? But—”

“Please~?” He even looked up while leaning against their chest, using a begging face. He wanted to hear it once, from their mouth. No, he had to hear it!

They were flustered, clearly, stuttery, and yet soon signed, finally giving in. “F… Fine! I… I… I lo… lo… I love you too, Ramuda.”

And even when he expected it, hearing it from their lips was still a comfort on its own. He didn’t respond to it, not verbally at least, and instead decided to just get as close as he could, burying himself into their chest by then. Hearing it made him feel all fuzzy inside, there were no words needed. He didn’t even worry about the why himself, even if he questioned it. He was willing to accept it without a second thought after all and wanted to just enjoy the moment.

“Hehe~ Ann–Chan’s all mine now~”

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know-the-self · 2 years

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‘Go on, Deva, pick up your Vajra and kill your enemy.

Fate controls the lives of all beings, and their deaths. The only exception is the Parama Purusha, The Absolute - Supreme Self - Pure Awareness. The worlds and their Gods live and indulge in karma by the will of this Being, the Kaalatman - Time Self.

Knowing none of this, men identify themselves with their mortal bodies, forgetting the eternal Lord - Awareness, within their hearts.

He controls everything, and we are deceived that we are the doers.

No moment of our lives is in our hands. When fate wills, we are born. Fortune and misfortune, labour and rest, bright and dark, good and evil befall us, each in their time, as ordained by destiny. One should cast a cold eye upon these opposite things: honour and dishonor, poverty and wealth, victory and defeat, pleasure and pain, and yes, even life and death. This is the only wisdom.

And this wisdom can be obtained only with God’s grace. The man who knows that sattva, rajas and tamas are but the modes of nature, not the essences of the Self - Awareness, who is always an actless witness to the interplay of these gunas, that man is illumined and freed from the bonds of samsara.

Look at me, O Indra, You have vanquished me and sloughed off my arm with your Vajra. Yet, I shall fight you, and never give in to my last breath. That is my dharma.

A field of battle is a final gambling house: life is the stake, arrows the dice and our men and beasts the board across which the dice roll. But, finally, only Time knows who will win and who will lose the day, who will live and who die.’

Indra was silent for a long moment, gazing at this amazing adversary, this calm and enlightened Demon.

He joined his hands to show respect for his enemy, then said with a laugh, ‘Danavas, you are truly a Siddha! - Enlightened. Why, you are more, you are a true bhakta - devotee, the highest sort, of the Lord who rules the universe. Ignorance does not blind you, and you speak in wonderful wisdom at this moment of your direst peril.

Great Vritra, I bow to you that laugh in Death’s very face! The Lord’s maya - cosmic illusion, does not delude you, Asura. I am astonished that you, a demon, rajasic by nature, as such a devotee of the sattvik Lord Hari - Vishnu

A bhakta like you drinks from the ocean of amrita - immortality. What do the ditches and gutters, which are the pleasures of Devaloka - Heaven, mean to you, Great Vritra, noblest of my enemies?’

-Bhagavata Purana, Ramesh Menon

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cherryatombomb · 1 year

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Taskforce 141 + Los Vaqueros as D&D Classes

i am indulging myself wholeheartedly in this post i hope u understand. if u disagree let me know im curious to see what u think >:D might make a separate post for people like laswell, farah, etc

Simon "Ghost" Riley - he'd be drawn to warlock. not only does it fit his edgy dynamic, i think he'd really enjoy the duel nature of the patron giving the powers. he's probably spent a lot of his life not quite feeling in control, so it gives him a good way to experience that through dnd. might go down the pact breaker path and end up switching classes, probably to something like fighter/barbarian for the simplicity of it. could see him going down the gunslinger route, too, if given the opportunity. he gets super into the roleplay part of it, but he's very quiet to begin with. takes him a while to get into it. he would be such a dice hoarder, too. he's a crow.

John "Soap" MacTavish - this man is 100% an artificer, are you kidding me? the ability to make his own weapons/bombs is something he'd absolutely love. ka-freaking-boom baby, he would play a chaotic character who enjoys being an absolute menace during battles. hes the one who puts the dm through the most strife /aff but hes such a fun player nonetheless. is a little sillier during roleplay interactions, but he gets into it, too. he'd end up playing a smaller race like a gnome, and he would absolutely love it. where this man goes, explosions follow. this applies to dnd, too! he's tempted by bards, though, too, but hasn't had the opportunity to play one yet.

Kyle "Gaz" Garrick - i think he'd actually really enjoy playing as a rogue. hes good in game as a sniper, and i think he might end up playing a robin hood type rogue, rather than the edgy rogue trope. he would absolutely love things like stealthing around and sneak attacking during fights. his character would end up being pretty lawful good. it would take him a little while to get into the swing of roleplaying, as towards the start, when he begins to roleplay, he gets all laugh-y about it, he actually gets really into it the more he goes on. he's like ghost, ends up taking the roleplaying really seriously - commits to his characters morals well.

John Price - probably ends up going with fighter, most likely to play human fighter - but he'd be interesting with it! to begin with, he just wanted to play something simple so it didn't take much to learn, but he ends up also taking a leadership role in the game, too. would take him a while to get into roleplay, but towards the end, he gets really into giving big old speeches before they finish up the BBEG. i think his fighter would have the backstory of a veteran fighter, a man who's constantly known fighting, just like himself. the leader of the party.

Alejandro Vargas - barbarian, without a DOUBT. this man is a protector through and through, and it shines through even in dnd. he enjoys being the one at the forefront of battles, tanking damage and also hitting hard, at the same time. his character is the most like him out of everybody else's, gruff and gritty, but incredibly protective and loving. he's the one that's most likely to sacrifice himself for the others characters - and god damn, it would be emotional!

Rodolfo Parra - cleric/druid. this is a 50/50 for me. i think rudy likes to be a protector in a different way to alejandro, the ability to heal being something he loves. i could see him playing a super strong cleric, one with plenty of healing spells, but one that can also do massive amounts of damage if needed. he might also enjoy playing druid simply because i think he'd be interested in druid's magic, turning into animals and such. he's a shyer player, but he gets into it eventually - just like his irl self, his character is linked with alejandro's, inseparable.

#call of duty #task force 141 #los vaqueros #simon ghost riley #john soap mactavish #kyle gaz garrick #john price #alejandro vargas #rodolfo parra #rodolfo rudy parra #captain john price #headcanons

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uwusillygirl · 11 months

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ok ok ok i'm wracking my peanut-sized brain, and what i'm thinking about now is what it looks like when they give each other presents, especially since they have so much money

also, this ask gives you carte blanche to talk about whatever intricacies of the porn industry you find most fascinating

we're gonna get someone to get you to talk nice about yourself... on god...

UGH i love this question and it's sort of a tricky one! i think that chrissy has probably had a lot of boyfriends who are pleased when she gives them flashy, shiny things, but i think that eddie is a pretty particular dude, and doesn't really have an interest in receiving gifts he's not going to use regularly. so i think chrissy learns quickly that if she's going to spend big money, it can't be on, like, a nice watch (eddie's got one of those little black plasticy ones and doesn't see why he'd need anything else). i think she probably ends up getting him the nicest possible version of something he's already interested in; a much nicer quality version of a shirt he already owns, some fancy dice, some nicer bedsheets. i think she ultimately likes that she has to get more creative with him (which sums up a lot of their relationship, actually!)

chrissy is similarly difficult in the sense she likes buying herself little things all the time, so you can't get her a cute luxury item of clothing if she already has it. that said chrissy is into sparkly and shiny and shit, so nice jewelry never really hurts, even if it feels like a cop-out to eddie.

(i also think trips and quality time based gifts are huge for them both!).

as for the second part of your question (so self-indulgent, thank you!), i really went nuts under the cut.

like most people i have very complicated feelings about the porn industry. my main take is that the most important perspectives can be found by people working/who have worked in porn. i think we're in an era where we urgently need to find the balance between debunking a lot of myths (weird christian conservative campaigns around human trafficking, myths around "porn addiction"), while also acknowledging there needs to be a reckoning on many fronts with failings in the industry (the real company i based eddie's work on is in the middle of a big controversy, for example. and i follow a lot of ex-porn stars who are stringently anti-porn, as well as some who have seen it as a net neutral/positive in their lives).

but as to what has always fascinated me about porn, i'd say i'm always drawn to the way it has existed for so long - basically as soon as we had a technical apparatus for sharing art, we also had people being like "alright let's make porn with it". which i find sorta endearing on a humanity level - so many of us are just little goblins trying to see sex.

and i also find it so fascinating how porn shifts over time; how massive cultural interests shape what's "big" in porn, and how we have imagined "porn" viewers who often don't sketch the full picture of who was informed and impacted by porn (i think a lot about the idea of "women-oriented" porn and what it implies about what we think is inherently female - softness and romance and kissing, with our "dirtiest" offers on something like bellesa being owen gray or some light bondage).

and now, as we move into a parasocial digital age, i'm fascinated by the way porn stars can cross into different versions of fame - sometimes having multiple jobs, sometimes having multiple platforms, sometimes being as much vloggers as they are porn industry talent (which raises new questions - how much of themselves do they have to sell to maintain an audience?)

idk! it's something i think about a lot! as a young wannabe bimbo i fell deep into the 2012-2018 porn aesthetics tumblr hole, and then as i grow and have taken classes on porn and try my best to read and watch a lot of theory and art on the matter and have become more invested in hyperfeminine aesthetics in my own gender and sexual expression (in a way that is less tied to porn) my feelings get more and more complex.

all this said, for semi-charmed life i'm working deep, deep within fantasy (things like the waivers i mention don't even exist outside of bdsm scenes, a lot of costars aren't close friends, etc.). all of my sex and kink based writing is deep within fantasy, though! i write fic that turns me on, not guidebooks lmao

#semi charmed life #asks

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