#and the formation for overdose in the beginning of the song

[behindthescenesoftaylor]

The Person I Used To Be.(Kyle x reader)

(I did not proofread this or edit because I’m lazy so if there is any mistakes or things that seem weird, tell me. Also if you have any tips or requests send those my way PLEASE.

Warning: This story contains mature themes including drug use, self-harm, and underage drinking. Reader discretion is advised. It may be triggering for some individuals.

(Characters are 17, this was based off deftone’s- Change.)

After (y/n)’s mom dies from an overdose, (y/n) finds herself lost in drug and alcohol. Kyle is concerned with this, she’s changed, she’s not the person she used to be

Kyle stood there against the wall with his arms crossed, an unpleasant feeling settling deep in his stomach. he was looking at (y/n), she was surrounded by people, younger and older. They cheered for her as she took another shot, the burn making her flinch but oh how she loved the feeling.

“Yes (y/n)!!!”

“Atta girl!”

“Get it hottie!”

She slammed the glass back onto the table and put her arms up in unison. The now empty glass was put aside as the 12th graders pulled out pill bottles and blade. The people around her started cheering once again.

“Hey! Does anybody have a bill?” A 10th grader asked and Kyle could see (y/n) getting out a single 5$ bill. They boy put the pills onto the table and began to crush them before formatting them into multiple single lines.

“I get to go first, since i won the shot contest!” (Y/n) slurred, a fat smile spreading onto her lips. Kyle hated the way the other boys looked at her, as if she was just an object. (Y/n) took the bill and rolled it up before placing it at the beginning of the line and sniffing all the way down. She took a deep breath and slowly exhaled, feeling the adrenaline.

“Fuck that was hot” a boy said, others nodding in agreement. Kyle furrowed his eyebrows in a silent anger, a flashback coming to him.

(Y/n) and Kyle sat in the waiting room, his hand was over her thigh as she chewed on her nail nervously. Her mother had been admitted after she found her on the floor, pill bottles in her hand. Tears leaked down her face as Kyle tried to comfort her, to his disappointment, it wasn’t working.

“Fuck, Kyle she told me she quit! She- she told me she was sober?! This is all my fault- it’s all my fault, i should have looked m-“

Her talking stopped as the doctor walked out of the door, his hands to his side. (Y/n) immediately stood up and rushed to the doctor.

“How is she? Is she okay?” She questioned. The doctor stood there with a frown for a second, the words leaving his mouth as soon as he saw the little girl, alone, sobbing.

“IS SHE OKAY?” She repeated frantically

“Ms. (L/n), I’m sorry to say this-“ the world went silent as he said the words, her hand flew over her mouth in shock as she back upped in disbelief until she couldn’t no more, hitting the wall. She slid down, and Kyle walked to her, sitting beside her and wrapping her in a huge hug as she sobbed and sobbed. Her cries echoing, leaving the day feeling empty for everyone who could hear.

Kyle shook his head, leaving his thoughts as a the song changed. (Grind on me by pretty ricky) He looked back and saw (y/n) getting up with Clyde . They went to the middle of the floor and started to dance, she turned with her back facing the clydes front and began to rub against him. (Y/n) was too high from the drugs and too drunk to process what she was doing, she was just caught in the moment. She tuned back around and Clyde began to kiss her neck as she continued to sway her hips.

Kyle freaked at this, this was his last straw, you were way to under the influence for this. He marched up to you and grabbed you by your arm roughly, pulling you away from Clyde and outside into his car. “Ow Kyle, what the fuck?!”

“Your coming to my house until this shit wears of (y/n), this is so irresponsible of you, I’m disappointed.” He says, quickly buckling in his seatbelt and starting the car.

“Dissapointed? Okay mother” she said back. Kyles head tuned back and forth as his eyes focused on the road infront of him. The ride to his house was short, taking less than 3 minutes to get there, and as soon as they parked Kyle was out of the door pulling (y/n) along with him.

Her footings were stumbled and she struggled to walk without tripping, Kyle had to hold her up for her to actually get in his house, unharmed. He was lucky that his family wasn’t home, they were currently in another state, for ikes hockey tournament.

They reached the living room before she lost her footing and she fell, hitting her head on the couch and her arm on the table.

“Goddammit, (y/n) are you okay?” Kyle questioned.

(y/n) got up and began to spin around, a feeling of bliss enlightening her. “I’m amazing Kyle! It’s so calming.”

Kyle shook his head and took her by the arm again, they got to the kitchen and suddenly, he picked her up.

“Wee!” (Y/n) said, it might just have been a couple feet but to her it felt like she was flying, the effects of the cross fade getting to her. Kyle placed her on the counter, making sure she was steady, and he hurriedly got the first aid kit, hoping she wouldn’t fall in the meantime.

Once he got it he went back and set it down beside her. She sat there looking into the distance, smiling. Kyle opened the box, took out the alchohol, and light pored it onto a cotton ball. His hands gently held her face as he bagan to dab it on the cut from the fall.

He then placed a bandaid on it, but unlike before, this time she gripped his arm. Her hands venturing up until she reached his cheek, Kyle sat there staring into her eyes. She spreads her legs, giving him room to stand between and pulled him in close, but before their lips could meet, he pulled away.

“Your drunk, (y/n)” he turned away, staring to the floor.

“So? I’m also high of coke, what about it?”

“Are you serious right now (y/n)?! What about it?!”

By this point Kyle was straight on yelling, his emotions getting the better of him.

“Your such a fucking party pooper kyle!” She hopped off the counter and began to walk out of the door, with the intention of going back to the party. She was not in the mood to deal with this.

He pulled her by her sleeve away from the door and took her to the bathroom, blocking the exit, she wasn’t going to get away this time.

“Party?! (Y/n) all that was, was a drug fest! You know it and i know it.”

“Kyle move!” She yelled trying to push him out of the way. He just shook his head no, refusing to let her out until she composed herself.

“Fine if i can’t go to the party, I’ll bring the party to me.” (Y/n) exclaimed as she slammed open the medicine cabinet and pulled out a random bottle. Kyle quickly grabbed her and pinned her to the ground, ripping the bottle out of her hand.

“(Y/n) are you serious? What the fuck is wrong with you?!” He yeld, holding her down. She struggled against him and tried to pry herself from his hands.

“Kyle i need it, I need it Please” she begged, longing for the feeling of the pills. “Please ky”

“(Y/n) don’t you see, this is how your mom died, i don’t want that to happen to you!!”

“Ky, it numbs me, all the pain leaves and even if just for a few hours! I don’t want to feel anymore pain, please Kyle, please.” She began to sob, her chest bouncing against him. He picked her up bridal style when she went limp, carrying her to his bed as she continued to cry.

“Shh” he said while setting her down under the covers and laying next to her, he took her smaller figure into his arms and wrapped tight as she just stared at the wall. Soon after, she fell asleep.

—

The next day she awoke still in his arms, hearing little snouts pouring out of his mouth. The headache from the hangover began as she moaned loudly and rolled out of the bed, away from his arms.

Kyle woke up, confused, seeing her on the ground holding her head. He realized that she was probably hungover, so he got up and got some medicine for her and placed it next to the water he placed on the table.

“Here” he said gently, his smooth voice making her heart flutter. She slowly grabbed the pills and the water and gulped them down, she then slid to sit against the wall with her knees to her chest, leaving an awkward silence around the room.

“So last night was eventful, I’m guessing” she said. She couldn’t really remember anything, just Kyle taking her here.

“(Y/n), this needs to stop. It’s unhealthy and dangerous.” He declared, looking at her from the bed. “It’s changing you.”

“Changing me? How? Because i don’t give a fuck now?!” She said, her voice slowly rising. He let out a sigh and ran his hands through his hair.

“People aren’t Supposed to feel numb, (y/n), that’s why the drugs are fucking illegal. You dyed your hair, got piercings, and your attitude has just changed! You’re doing the one thing you promised you wouldn’t ever do!”

“well people fucking change Kyle!” She yelled angrily, a scowl on her face.

“Not like this (y/n)! Your changing too much and unnaturally!! Your not the person i used to love anymore.”

Her angry facial expression immediately left, he used to love her? He got up from the bed and raced out of the room. “Kyle- Kyle wait!”

He ignored her and grabbed his keys, rushing inside his car. The car began to back up as she exited the house, leaving her there by herself, with the thought of him saying he used to love her, alone.

#kyle broflovski #south park #kyle x reader #kyle broflovski x reader #clyde donovan #drug abuse #alcohol #x reader #female reader #change #change (in the house of flies) #change deftones #sadgirl #part 1 #(y/n) #make this go viral #Southpark reader #south park requests #Spotify

[cornsobsessions]

These fics weren't all published in 2021 (in fact many of them were not) but I did read all of them in 2021.

They cover a wide range of ratings and topics so please read any of the writers tags and content warnings before reading.

Anything in Italics is my thoughts. This post is long, sorry

1. it all started with 1 (one) twitter DM (series) by rickysims (@omg-whiskey) whiskent | 400k Kent Parson and Connor Whisk didn't exactly mean to fall in love, it started out with one DM and it kind of snowballed from there... One of my all time favorite fics that I have read countless times

2. No Matter How Small by weneedtotalkaboutsherlock (@weneedtotalkaboutfic) zimbits | 125k "Elliot," Eric says, "this is Jack. Jack, this is Elliot."

3. After Me by rayemars zimbits, kent/omc | 250k In 2009 Kent "living Taylor Swift song" Parson goes first in the draft, moves to Nevada, and starts an NHL career that includes one Stanley Cup win, one league lockout, a lot of media manipulation, bad blood with several teams, a captaincy, big city politics, and the pressure that comes with some questionable sponsors for a club located in the gambling heart of the United States. Meanwhile, the Las Vegas Aces learn how to work around the ghost of Jack Zimmermann. (Not literally.) A wonderful story of life and growth. The original characters are amazing and I could not stop reading.

4. consider the hairpin turn (do not choose sides yet) by jjcofeesa (@30samwiches) zimbits, holsom, shardo, pimms | 50k You are not in a car with a beautiful boy. You are in a car next to a beautiful boy. And in a car behind your ex. And in a car ahead of your best friend. If you're Jack Zimmermann, current World Driver's Champion, that is. If you're Eric Bittle, you're too nervous about your rookie season to be thinking about what the boys in the other cars look like. (You tell yourself you're too nervous, anyway. You do think about it.) If you're on Twitter, well. They're all beautiful boys, and you wish you could be in the car with them.

5. with grace in your heart by iridescentoracle and mutuisanimis zimbits | 140k When Kent Parson shows up at Epikegster 2014, he doesn’t mess up Jack and Bitty’s relationship, but it is a turning point.

6. Begin Again (series) by aleia kent parson, ptater | 320k When Jeff Troy agrees to billet new rookie Kent Parson, he assumes he's going to be stuck with teenager trying to party and bring girls back to the apartment. That's not at all what he gets. (Description from Part 1)

7. Dear Jack by WrathoftheStag (@wrathofthestag) zimbits | 20k Just after his overdose, Jack Zimmermann meets patient Eric Bittle at New York–Presbyterian Hospital and the two make an immediate connection. When Bitty leaves the hospital and Jack begins rehab in Montreal, they start a correspondence that will forever change their lives, and hearts. This absolutely murdered me but it was also so so so beautifully written

8. Ethics of Journalism by rosepetals42 zimbits | 12k When Dan Erikson is assigned to write an article about Jack Zimmermann's years in college, he thinks he knows what he's getting into. Then he meets Professor Simpson, Jack's photography professor.

9. Something Like This by emmagrant01 zimbits primarily | 285k Jack thought his first year in the NHL would be 100% about hockey, but the reality is so much more complicated. The OCs and storytelling are just so good

10. out in the open by wit (@parvuls) zimbits | 35k TMZ ✔ @TMZ · May 23, 2019 22:36 Jack Zimmermann and Eric Bittle’s Friendship Goes Viral After Release of Providence Falconers Video One thing is for sure: this isn't what Bitty expected to happen when he first DMed NHL forward Jack Zimmermann. The formatting, the story telling, all of it was just magical

11. Firecracker by procrastinationfairy patater | 18k Kent's best friend (with benefits) tells him she's pregnant with his child, and if he doesn't want the baby, she'll adopt it out. Kent doesn't want the baby. He's still dealing with issues from his childhood and every failed relationship. He's not ready to come out. He's not ready to be a father. He doesn't want to be. (Except he does.)

12. Ice Crew Please! by rosepetals42 zimbits | 61k Jack Zimmermann was drafted first by the Providence Falconers when he was eighteen years old. He is good at hockey. Very good. His team won the Cup his second year and now, in his third year, they are looking good. Jack should be on top of the world. And some days, he manages to convince himself he is. He’s not, of course. Enter the Ice Crew.

13. DREAMBOY by chillmari patater, zimbits | 22k Alexei Mashkov was number 7 of the Providence Falconers, and he couldn’t imagine being anywhere else. When he was on the ice, he knew that it was his new home. Beneath it all, Alexei was scared to live in Russia. The constant ghost of who he was meant to marry haunting him no matter where he went. Everyone back home always asked him if he had settled down yet. If he had finally found the woman of his dreams. In Providence, he found his home. He knew that within the black ridden puck and beneath the hidden cracks of the ice, that he found comfort in the brisk air, and silently appreciated the warmth he felt in his heart that came from the frozen fractals of the ice. He didn't have to worry about his sexuality. He didn't have to worry about his dream girl. Everything in Alexei’s life was going smoothly. Until it all didn’t.

14. Like Real People Do by xiaq kent/omc | 154k “So still two dates to go then?” Parson continues. “I—what?” “We’ve got a roadie coming up but then we’re home for almost two weeks. When does your semester start?” “You want to do this again?” Eli asks. Parson stops idly twirling his spoon. “You don’t?” He does, Eli realizes. He really does. Because apparently he actually likes Kent fucking Parson. while not available on AO3 anymore, that is because it is being published into a real book in spring 2022, it is really good, and if anyone is interested in reading before then i have a pdf i downloaded and can send you (as that does appear to be allowed, if that changes please let me know)

15. roads all even and peaceful by ahermioneh (@zimms) olliewicks | 13k In which Ollie and Wicks definitely don't run hockeyblr blogs. No way. And they definitely aren't mutuals. No. Not at all. I love the way their lives, friendship, and relationship are portrayed through tumblr posts and messages

16. northern lights at dawn by weneedtotalkaboutsherlock (@weneedtotalkaboutfic) zimbits | 8k He's at a party reuniting some of the most beautiful people in the world, he's single, and lord, nobody can fault him for thinking that, perhaps, he could be making out with a cute boy by the end of the evening.

17. i hugged you close in the parking lot by acornfield (that's me) jack and shitty | 300 Sometimes life happens and before you know it, it's been two years since you've seen your best friend. Yes I put my own fic in this list, that is because I am very happy with it and think about it all the time

18. Heart of the Haus (series) by cricketnationrise (@cricketnationrise) smh in some way or another | 15k A collection of timestamp fics, all under 1k, set in the haus. The little snippets into life in the Haus are just so fun to read

19. Excuse Me While I Kiss This Guy by PorcupineGirl zimbits | 8k Jesse Snowden knows all the best restaurants and gourmet food shops in Providence, so when Jack Zimmermann starts bringing in incredible baked goods, he's eager to find out where the new bakery is. When he meets the man behind the pies, he decides that there's no way Jack could really appreciate this guy's talent the way he does, even if they are friends. He starts hiring Jack's chef on the side, in the hopes that maybe once Bitty's done with college he'll come work for Jesse. Good thing there is absolutely no way whatsoever that Jesse could possibly be misinterpreting this situation.

20. Bits of Heaven by WrathoftheStag (@wrathofthestag) zimbits, nurseydex, shardo, holsom | 22k At age 44, NHL legend, Jack Zimmermann, knows three things for sure: retirement is boring, love is probably not in the cards for him, and his aging father makes a pretty good roommate. When the bakery "Bits of Heaven" opens up down the street, Jack finds that a happily ever after is possible—even late in the game.

21. collapsing everything he once knew nurseydex | 79k Its Dex's senior year. He's stepping into the shadow of Bitty's leadership, pressure building onto him. This year will collapse everything he once knew about himself, wading through uncomfortable waters, balancing his schoolwork all while realising that he might not be as straight as he thinks he is. “--but I know you enough that you hate new things,” Nursey says. Dex has to stop himself from moving, they’re not close, how does Nursey know him so well like the back of his hand? “So if you need help, me and Chowder are here. Denice is here as well.” “Cool,” Dex manages to breathe out, not wanting to raise his voice any louder. “Cool." A wonderful look into the future of SMH

Making this list and then ordering it was so ridiculously hard as you all are so incredibly talented and I read hundreds of fics this year and loved every single one of them (I just looked and I have 31 pages of AO3 history from this year--what). All of this to say that this was so hard, you all are so talented, and I cannot wait to read more <3

#when i say making this list was extremely hard i am not kidding #i just want to go back and reread all of these #everyone is so talented its insane #i didn't include any from the current big bang even though it is 2021 bc a lot of the works aren't complete yet #and including them would only make this 10 times harder #i have added some of them to a list for next year already though lol soooo #omgcp #omgcp fic rec #best of 2021 #omgcheckplease

[thegirlwhohasnochill]

The Disease of Addiction

Euphoria Special Episode Part 1: Rue (Recap & Review)

Before I begin my official review of this episode, I would like to preface my thoughts with a bit of a primer about spoilers and trigger warnings. The show covers a range of topics from addiction to mental health. Still, I specifically want to warn anyone reading that I explicitly talk about and mention the topic of suicide in my review. If this is triggering for you in any way, please, don’t read ahead and take care of yourself! Okay, that’s it; I hope you enjoy my thoughts, and please let me know if you have any feedback or comments for my review and things I can change or fix in the future.

Where to begin with such a loaded episode...we knew the format and style of the episode would be simplistic based on the current realities of filming amidst a pandemic and what we saw to be a scene from Season 2 that the creator Sam Levinson expanded upon. Zendaya herself let us know that the episode's storytelling method would be vastly different from what we’ve already seen on the show. The format and simplicity of the episode, in contrast to the loaded dialogue and content of the scenes, are perfect. The camera takes you right into the middle of these conversations with Rue and Ali. But before we can even dive into what they talk about, we have to address the elephant in the room that is Rules. The episode begins with what is probably one of the most gut-wrenching sequences I have seen on the show. Because we know the reality and truth of their current predicament, Rue’s peppered kisses across Jules’ body and her tight squeezes and hugs from behind Jules evoke a strong sense of loss and pain for the viewer. The sheer intensity of the physicality of Rue’s affection for Jules is so overpowering and overwhelmingly present, we can almost feel the imbalance in their relationship through the screen. There is something to be said for the harsh reality of Rue’s dependence on Jules being reflected even in such a non-objective dream-like sequence. And yet, even in Rue’s wildest dreams and happiest stupor, she does not imagine the sobriety of her future. To me, that is indeed the crux of her character and the essence of this episode. Ali himself says, “The point is your sobriety.” And while it may feel like a focal point of discussion, the conversation flows in a way that seems to bounce back and forth between the two like a simple tennis match. It is easy to follow between Ali’s most potent clearest convictions about how the world works and Rue’s drug-addled hazy perception. The inherent contrast between their mental states and the different points of life in which they are both standing hit the viewer at alternate moments.

But we know Rue is not sober even as she lies to Ali and stumbles out of the bathroom, the shaky camerawork conveying her recent use. She is wearing the same shirt from the dream but has her signature hoodie on, her messy curly locks running down her back and glassy eyes staring straight ahead. The scene moves from her imagination of life with Jules to her lies about use. Her eventual admittance to being a high-functioning user happens as quickly as the conversation moves from sobriety to faith.

So I might be biased and hence don’t think I am incorrect in admitting that Zendaya has never given us a bad performance in her life. Even as she lies to Ali’s face and he is quick to call out her apparent contradictions, the faint slurring of her voice and her glazed eyes tell all. As striking as the conversation is, it feels even stranger for me to admit I felt comforted by Rue’s confession to thoughts of ending her life. And even as she admits to the darkest moments in her mind, Ali’s face and reaction are an even better neutralizer for what would generally be such an alarming thing to say to someone you barely know. As they continue to discuss her eventual relapse and all the reasons behind it (including racing thoughts encompassing “all the things I remember and all the things I wish I didn’t”), the viewer can envision the sequence of events that was shown to us in the finale - her fights with her mother and sister, her first time using when her father was fast asleep, her father’s death, her sister finding her after her overdose.

As much as I would like to quote the entire episode, I have to say Ali’s monologue about the idea that none of us are born evil and that society views mental illness and addiction as a personal moral failure rather than an overarching system many of us are incapable of overcoming, to be one of, if not the most decisive moments of the entire show. The line about coming out of the womb with “a few wires crossed” but still a beautiful baby girl eventually messing her way up through life struck a chord in me. I didn’t ask to be born this way. I don’t feel in control of my mind or the way it ever seems to work. And I’m always going to be a bad person. The disease of addiction and mental illness lets you - no, it makes you - view everything you have ever done in your life as not a consequence of the way your mind works, but as an active choice, you have consistently made, as you screwed up everything you’ve ever loved, and let down everyone you have ever cared about. The disease is not you as a person or even the way you think, and yet it is powerful enough to feel that way. Almost like the rapid cycling between mania and depression, the disease flips between, making you feel like the most powerful, invincible person alive and the absolute scum of the earth. There is nothing in between.

Ali’s backstory and his monologues about his change in faith from Christianity (when he was previously known as Martin) to Islam and the world's revolutions were fascinating. Side note: I did think the line about women converting to Islam was unnecessary, but I digress.

Rue’s understanding of the Narcotics Anonymous program's steps was the perfect way to bring in the conversation of faith. As she mentions her difficulty in coming to terms with the idea that there is greater power in charge of her behaviour and the way she surrenders herself to drugs, Ali chimes in with, “You don’t believe there is a power on Earth greater than Rue.” She disagrees and continues quoting and citing different sources she believes to be omniscient and great. And I absolutely agree with her. To me, there is no greater power than the source of art, the music that keeps me going, that feels like it’s the only thing keeping me from stopping the blood pumping through my veins. I understand Rue. But I also understand Ali. And yet, when Rue goes on to talk about the inexplicable workings of the world, my heart stops. There is no reason. There is no reason for the absolute pain and loss and suffering I’ve experienced, for the trauma I’ve witnessed and endured. For the absolutely horrifying things, the people closest to me have lived through. It is merely chaos. There is no reason I wake up every single day, regretting the fact that I did indeed wake up and that I am alive and breathing. So I Understand Rue. But Ali’s monologue about the moral arc of the universe and the unfathomable ways in which life and history line themselves up, to open our very eyes to the realizations we come to daily, is overwhelming. And yet, while he is waxing poetic about the intricacies of the world, we can see Rue’s exhausted eyes glaze over further, still unimpressed. “Maybe I’ll start a revolution like Malcolm X or something”, she quips back. But Ali is quick to counter; revolutions are no longer revolutionary.

Life as we know it is hypocrisy and foolish symbolism, only emphasizing his point about the universe's ridiculousness. Does any of it have meaning? Or is the meaningless void just another puzzle piece in a picture we will never get to see? There is also something to be said about Rue’s facial expressions as Ali continues his train of thought about her “generation”. As we often do when we hear our elders dismissively brush off our many concerns, she almost rolls her eyes. But he is listening, and he knows. “You think you’re out here fighting a revolution, and Bank of America is on your side? Give me a fucking break.” He’s not wrong. His speech reminds me of the masses of teens on TikTok creating video content specifically catered to an audience with an aesthetic that glamorizes the image of a revolutionary teen hero. But instead of a blazing bow and arrow, it is the common cell phone and a punchy soundtrack filtered through digitized audio. What would typically come across as preachy in any show catered to teens is, in fact, poignant. It also reminds me of how self-aware Euphoria is, knowing it’s guilty of falling into the same trap it accuses the viewer of doing.  

You have to commit to bettering yourself, Ali essentially tells Rue. And to me, that is the most inherently human struggle we will ever face in our lifetimes. As long as we exist, we have to face the idea that each day is, in fact, not going to be easier than the last. And when he tells her that he believes in her and that the hope of her success (that may one day come) should be greater than the failure of her current demise holding her back, I want to cry. I keep thinking about that edit of Rue to this is me trying by Taylor Swift.

The music of the song that Jules has texted to Rue swells, and it is easy to get caught up in the angst of the moment. It accompanies the words, “I miss you.” And if it wasn’t for Ali’s conversation with his daughter as background noise, one would simply soak in the gut-wrenching pain of their separation. The juxtaposition of Ali trying his absolute best to cling to his family as Rue continues to isolate herself from her loved ones and push herself further into the abyss makes my heart physically hurt.

Ms. Marsha’s spell-binding words of wisdom about sobriety and relationships compared to Rue’s tired exhaustion imminently displayed on her face make the viewer a little wary of what comes next. Her misunderstanding of a juvenile relationship with Jules is made clear when Ali confronts her about the fact that the two of them never had a real conversation about their feelings for one another. Rue’s distrust in the idea that things will eventually work themselves out stems from the fact that she feels disappointed by how her loved ones have left her so far. She eventually spirals into this negatively destructive way of thinking. She cognitively recognizes and justifies getting left behind because she thinks and believes she deserves terrible things in life. She lists examples of past deeds to further cement her argument. But Ali counters back with the simple statement that “Drugs change who you are as a person.” Regardless of her actions, he believes she is still a genuinely good individual while she argues that she is absolutely not. My favourite part of this whole conversation and the entire episode is the manner in which Ali questions Rue’s negative cognitive patterns. Her brain and mind essentially excuse bad behaviour by convincing her that she will never be a good person. Hence she can never forgive herself, and thus, she will continue to remain in this cyclical pattern. Our actions may be inexcusable, but they do not line up with our intentions. The inevitable human struggle is not whether we are fundamentally good or bad, evil, flawed or perfect, but if we are (and again, not to quote my other favourite show, The Good Place) trying to be a better person than we previously were. If we recognize that our actions are wrong and we are capable of experiencing remorse and regret for said actions, who's to say we are entirely incapable of change. This reductive polarizing, and dismissive way of thinking is characteristic of the brains of most people living with a mental illness. Our outside influences, such as drugs, can all be contributing external factors to how we conduct ourselves through life. Ali’s short bit about redemption and human beings deeming actions unforgivable forever can easily be paralleled to direct conversations we have online about “cancel culture”. The phenomenon of dismissing and reducing someone to their mistakes instead of allowing them to grow from them is a nice sentiment. Still, if we do not truly take accountability into action and witness no real changes or remorse, we can quickly get stuck in that cycle. Even if our beliefs do not line up with our actions, drugs can eventually change that. The belief system we hold so dearly, the convictions we strongly feel, can all be washed away by the simple use of drugs, Ali explains as he tells Rue about his family background. His experiences with abuse and his eventual hypocrisy as he plays the role he always feared in his family leave the viewer speechless. As we watch him tell his tale of regret, there is no woe or sorrow in admitting he is or isn’t a fundamentally good or bad person, just the thought of his attempt to change his ways that impacts the viewer.

As the viewer waits with bated breath to see what comes out of Rue’s mouth next, it is not a surprise (to me personally). Rue has no intention of staying sober because she has no intention of staying alive much longer. Ali asks her why she feels that way. She responds with her sentiments about the cruelty of the world. Ali understands. We truly are living in dark times, witnessing truly horrific events, and the fact that we even have the capacity to care any longer is indicative of our will to stay alive. It doesn’t make much sense when you think about it, but when you are so sad, so grief-stricken by the news, by the world’s turn of events, by the mere thought of witnessing more tragedy that you cannot bear to be alive any longer, it means that you are deeply invested. Invested in the way things will turn out even if you do not personally believe you want to participate or even be privy to being complicit in a system that does nothing but churn out pain, anger, and hatred. When I was at the lowest point in my life and attempted to end my own life, I was overwhelmed by the goings-on of the world. As emotionally drained as Rue is, a part of her still cares. She wants her sister and mother to know that she really tried. Just as I wanted and still want my parents and friends to be okay without me when I do eventually leave this earth. Of course, I care about what happens to them. The idea that suicide or suicidal ideation is inherently selfish is so contradictory to the reality of how suicidal individuals genuinely feel. It is the opposite. We care more than most, and we care to the point that it hurts to extend another moment of kindness to ourselves amid all the chaos and madness of the world. But still, we try. We do our best. Ali believes in Rue. He has faith in her.

The entire episode ends on a melancholy note as Rue and Ali depart the diner with Rue wistfully staring out the window as he drives her home. Ali loves his conversations with Rue and vice-versa. The fact that two people can be sitting at a diner alone on Christmas Eve talking about the beauty and cruelty of the world and everything ranging from politics to addiction to suicide to love to family and anything in between goes to show us that humans will always find a way. The fact that two people struggling and suffering from addiction can find their own way about and amidst the chaos of the world and still have these meaningful conversations about life and existence tells us that ultimately, Trouble Don’t Last Always.

#euphoria #zendaya #sam levinson #colman domingo #rue bennett #jules vaughn #rules #hbo #recap #review #nanwrites #rue #jules #zendaya coleman

[jaesqueso]

What if Johnny debuted in EXO?

If you didn’t already know when Johnny joined SM Entertainment he trained with the EXO members and he was actually part of some initial line-ups but ultimately not debuting until years later with NCT instead. As EXO are one of my favourite groups and Johnny happens to be my NCT bias wrecker sometimes I wonder what would happen if he had actually debuted with EXO so if you’re interested in it to, do join me on this ride!

✰

Position, Unit, Symbols and first Teasers

For position I think he would have the same as he currently has in NCT: Lead dancer, sub-rapper and vocalist. These positions really fit him and I think he would specially be a good addition do the dance line. He would also be replacing Sehun as the maknae as he is the youngest of the EXO final debut line-up.

Since EXO initially debuted with the Korean and Chinese sub-units concept I think he would fit more with the members of EXO-K than EXO-M so I believe he would be placed there until eventually the units are blend.

From the existing powers I think the most fitting one for Johnny would be Fire (because let’s face it, he does light a fire within us, right? No? Just me? Ok). But if he was an addition to the line-up instead of a replacement they would give him a new power so I think it could be something like speed, that would be a good addition to the existing ones. As for his number, since most numbers are based on their birthdays or favourite numbers he could either be 09 or 02.

EXO was announced in December 2011 but only officially debuted in April 2012, in the meantime we were presented by several teasers introducing the members. I believe Johnny could have easily slayed the “Lightsaber” teaser (originally by Kai), be part of one of the teasers that feat several members or even having a brand new teaser with another demo that SM teased but never released (the fact that we never got a full version of Metal still doesn’t sit right with me…).

Mama (EP)

“What is love” was the first pre-released track sang by D.O and Baekhyun (Korean version), and being the vocal song it is Johnny wouldn’t be part of it much like the rest of the members.

“History” was the second pre-release single and all the members are included in the vocals and dance so he would too. Johnny would probably get Chanyeol ad-lib’s in the beginning of the first and second parts of the song, as for dance he would probably be centre at least in one of the chorus and mostly in the front line of the formations. Out of the 3 singles for this EP I think this is the one that would fit him best.

“Mama” was the last single promoted for this album. I don’t think Johnny would have a lot of lines here because most of the song they all sing together. Honestly I do believe this choreography could’ve looked better with 7 members instead of 6 as some parts look a bit strange, and I think Johnny could have quite a few centre parts instead of Kai (don’t get me wrong, I love Kai but we gotta admit SM was way to biased in the beginning).

As for the other songs: “Angel” is sang by the vocal line and “Two Moons” by the rap line, I think Johnny would fit “Two Moons” better. “Machine” would also be a song he would fit in well.

XOXO (Studio Album)

“Wolf” is the title track for this album and there are a lot of parts for Johnny to slay, from the beginning divided by the rap line to the last section of the second part before the chorus. I would love to see him being another branch on the EXO tree (I love this choreography so much) and since all the members come together on this song he could have a lot of time in the front line.

As for the other songs: I don’t think he would participate in “Baby Don’t Cry” like Kai and Sehun because I think it’s really well split between the other 4 members. The songs that would most fist him in my option are “Let Out the Beast” as it has some good parts that would fit his voice, “Heart Attack” (I might be a bit biased on this one as it’s my favourite track on this album) and “My Lady” as I think the all vibe of the song would be very interesting to see him in.

XOXO (Repackage)

“Growl” is a very fitting song for Johnny in my option, he would absolutely kill this choreography and the whole school concept would look so good on him.

As for the other songs: he would be freaking adorable singing “XOXO”.

Bonus note: I would love to see his acting skills in the little drama they did for this album. SM could’ve done so much more with it if that concept had been more developed.

Miracles in December (EP)

“Miracles in December” this track is only sang by the main vocal line so again I don’t think Johnny would be part of it, although he would look gorgeous in that music video (the acting scenes).

As for the other songs: the most fitting one in my option would be “The Star” as I think it has the best vibe for him. Also can you imagine him in the elf costume? A-D-O-R-A-B-L-E!

Overdose (EP)

“Overdose” would also be a good tittle track for Johnny from styling to the choreography. In this one the rap line barely has any lines but I think he could’ve blend in with the vocal line instead.

As for the other songs: he wouldn’t participate in “Moonlight” as it’s only sang by D.O and Baekhyun but I would love to hear him in “Thunder”.

EXODUS (Studio Album)

“Call Me Baby” has a very nice vibe for Johnny, again styling and choreography wise he would absolutely slay this and I feel like he could also get quite a few lines (but last face it, this would be the perfect song for EXO if they stuck with the original tittle “Call Me Daddy”).

As for the other songs: he would participate in “My Answer” as again is focused on the main vocal tine but I would love to hear his voice in “What if…”, “El Dorado” and obviously “Playboy”.

Love Me Right (Exodus Repackage)

“Love Me Right” has such a beautiful aesthetic we would get so many cool Johnny shots. And even thought the stylist screwed up making them wear American football uniforms with baseball hats (logic where are you?) I would love to see him with that. For this one I don’t think he would have many lines but there are a lot of parts in the choreography where he could easily be centre.

As for the other songs: “Tender Love” would suit him so well.

Sing for You (EP)

“Sing for You” is a slower track pretty much sang by D.O, Chen and Baekhyun so I wouldn’t see him having a lot of lines, but also it wouldn’t be the most suited concept for him.

As for the other songs: obviously I think he would fit “Lightsaber” as I previously mentioned he could’ve been in the initial teaser, but also “Girl x Friend” has some good lines for him.

Ex’Act (Studio Album)

“Monster” has a very cool choreography for Johnny to slay and there are a lot of good lines for him too. Visually we’ve seen dark Johnny a few times so he would fit right in.

“Lucky One” would have me go crazy with Johnny in those white suits. Also if his power was speed, like I mentioned in the beginning, it would be cool seeing him use it in the music video to trick those women who are keep EXO locked down.

As for the other songs: in terms of side tracks this would be a very good album for him as most songs would fit his vibe, except “Stronger” that is sang by the main vocal line and I don’t really feel like there would be space for someone else as the original distribution is really good.

Lotto (Ex’Act Repackage)

“Lotto” is my favourite EXO tittle track (I don’t even understand why some many people hate it) and I would love to see Johnny there. The whole concept just screams his name, even if they didn’t gave him a lot of lines he would still stand out here.

As for the other tracks: “Can’t Bring Me Down” would also be a great track for his voice and I think he could’ve also joined the line-up for “She’s Dreaming” even though it’s not sang by the whole group.

For Life (EP)

“For Life”, just like “Sing for You” would also be a track where Johnny wouldn’t have many lines.

As for the other tracks: like in their first EP we have two songs one for the vocal line “What I Want for Christmas” and one for the rap line “Twenty Four” and although I would love to hear him on the first one he would’ve definitely be in the second one instead because it’s so much his vibe.

The War (Studio Album)

“Ko Ko Bop” is the tropical vibe I crave to see Johnny in. Ever since I saw him in that floral shirt for the “Resonance” teaser pictures I knew he would’ve slayed this. Also it would be amazing to see him dance this choreography.

As for the other tracks: let’s just cut to the case and admit we just want to see him do the choreography for “The Eve”. Now that we got that out of the way I can also say that this would be a very good album for him in terms of side tracks as I could see him fit any of them.

The War: The Power of Music (Repackage)

“Power” is my least favourite EXO tittle track but honestly I could see Johnny in this music video with the other members fitting that weird spaceship with Doctor Octopus arms and they could’ve even used his speed power to defeat the villain. This would be a great opportunity to show case his bright and corky personality. It would also be amazing to have his ‘superhero’ cards and have him included in the comic that you get from the physical albums.

As for the other songs: “Sweet Lies” would be an amazing song for him.

Universe (EP)

“Universe” is another slow song so it would pretty much be like “Sing for You” and “For Life”.

As for the other songs: this album has my favourite side tracks so I’ll be biased and say he would sound amazing in all of them. Well, except for “Lights Out” which I think is the same situation as “Stronger”.

Don’t Mess Up My Tempo (Studio Album)

“Tempo” would make all our biker Johnny dreams come through. There are some pretty good line options for him and he could also have some killer parts in the choreography. Overall another great tittle track for him.

As for the other songs: this would be another great album for his vibe, specially “Sign” and “Oh La La La”. Also I would die hearing him sing “Smile On My Face”.

Love Shot (Don’t Mess Up My Tempo Repackage)

(There are no individual pictures for this shoot)

“Love Shot” is another tittle track with a great choreography for Johnny to slay, can you imagine him dancing that chorus? Anyway, when I saw the editorial NCT 127 did for Elle Japan I just knew his yellow suit would have looked so good next to EXO’s suits for this era.

As for the other songs: I would’ve loved to know how his voice would complement “Wait”.

Obsession (Studio Album)

“Obsession” has such an amazing duality concept, I would love to see Johnny against x-Johnny. Styling wise it would be something very interesting for him to try. In terms of line I think this would be the hardest one to fit him in as I think this is probably the best EXO distribution of their discography but anything is possible.

As for the other songs: the best ones for him in this album would definitely be “Trouble”, “Jekyll” and “Ya Ya Ya.”

✰

Wow, this took me so long to put together but it was worthy to walkthrough the EXO memory lane with Johnny. In my honest option I think it was the right decision to not debut him with them as I feel like he fits the whole NCT vibe way better but it’s always fun to wonder!

Do let me know your thoughts on this and also if this is something you’d like to see again maybe with other groups or members.

Thanks for reading ❤︎

#johnny #nct #nct 127 #exo #what if

[alltheangstmygifttoyou]

First Vacation

A/N: This is the fifth part to Learn To Be’s prequel and one of the more graphic and upsetting parts so please pay attention to the trigger warnings, and please let me know if I need to add more. It is back in Jester’s perspective. Out of the early parts this one is one of my favorites, I like the way it’s formatted and with the help of my teacher I liked the little descriptions and details added. I hope ya’ll like it too.

Summery: Jester sits alone in the dorm room at night and remembers what her first vacation home was like.

Word Count: 2188

TW: Graphic violence, graphic child abuse, disassociation, carving, victim blaming

Jester sat back in the broken dorm chair in the dead of night. The only light in the large open room came from the glow of the electronic clock above the exit. It was just enough illumination to not reveal the location of anything but not let Jester’s eyes adjust to the darkness either. Everyone else was in their rooms, most likely asleep. Jester’s roommate hadn’t bothered to scold her about not going to bed, but no one else had either. Most students were tired after the excitement of the day, a new national holiday to celebrate the bond between family. Students had been given three days off school.

*        *        *

Jester should have expected a new holiday really, Father was a major part of the council, and they made all the rules for the country. She knew she’d be punished for rebelling by not taking the placement test but that would have come during Christmas, months away, allowing her plenty of time to come up with a plausible reason on why she needed to stay at her school Learn To Be. But instead after less than a month of freedom she’d only been given a days notice that that freedom was about to be taken away. Her mind had been blank that entire day, she felt as if she was watching herself move around. No one asked about it though. No one wanted to be friends with a kid from section fifteen. No one in section fifteen seemed to want to be. They all drifted through the halls like fallen leaves on a windy afternoon. Even June seemed to be barely there.

Jester wished she could have stayed in that half there state the entire holiday. Instead she snapped back into herself when her Father’s dark green eyes locked with hers and his smile grew. She sat on the right side of the car like she always had in Father’s car while Jesse sat on the far left. The air felt solid as if every breath was swallowing the tension made physical. Jesse kept looking at Jester and then looking away quickly despite Jester not moving. She kept her eyes forward on the black soft seat in front of her that her Mother currently occupied.

They began the ride home in silence, a bad sign seeing as Mother would no doubt be gushing out question after question for Jesse if their Father wasn’t angry. The silence was broken by their Father as they exited the large parking lot. The rear-view mirror was kept at an angle that made their Father’s eyes visible. It made it so the children were always aware that he was watching them. Since he was driving Jester couldn’t see much of his front but she could tell by the side of his face he was still smiling while he spoke.

“So how are you liking school so far kids?” He began with a simple question. It should have made her feel better to be included in the question, yet it just made all the moisture in her mouth evaporate. Jesse didn’t seem to get the same sense of danger though and began to ramble on about how great school was. How everyone had been really nice, and how his room was only a little smaller than the one at home. What the name of his new friends were and what their powers were. He hadn’t told half of this to Jester at their breakfast meetups. Although to be fair, they had talked less and less. Jesse constantly would just look at the table where his new friends were sitting at whenever Jester spoke. Jester didn’t have much she was willing to talk about in the first place, but if he wasn’t even listening then there was no point in saying anything at all. They mostly just gave good mornings to each other and then goodbyes.

“And what about you Jester, are you enjoying section fifteen?” His voice didn’t change with the question, it was still soft and hinted with curiosity. His eyes stared at her through the mirror. Jesse watched her as well. Whenever Jesse asked about section fifteen she avoided the topic, she’d brush it off and turn it around on him asking about section one. She could tell it frustrated him but she desperately didn’t want to lie outright to him anymore, but the truth hurt too much to say. Father knew she was miserable though, and he was taunting her.

“I am, the others are very nice and we work together to stay in control,” Jester hated how heavy the lie made her feel. It felt like her lungs were being squeezed by her rib cage. Her Mother’s had tightened into a fist on the top of the closed storage container between the front seats.

“Have you made any new friends like your brother?” Father pressed on and it took extreme focus to exhale steadily without tensing the rest of her body. She never made friends, people tended to avoid her ever since she started basics school. When she was little it was because she was too morbid, she would explain what could happen if the other kids ate random things off the ground and got poisoned, she would talk about how the body would sometimes just give up, or just asked the teacher surrounding topics most parents would shelter their kids from, like assault or overdose. Father made cruel real world realities apparent to her from a very young age. She talked about what five year olds shouldn’t know, and she ruined games of pretend with logic. There was once when she was little when another kid claimed that he had the power to fly in the game they were playing, and that he landed on a cloud. She explained that clouds were just water, and that he would just get wet. The other children did not appreciate this type of input. Jesse was her only friend, and that meant she would do anything to protect him. As such, kids began to dislike her even more because she was a liar, a liar that always won anyways. Teachers always believed her, after all, her lies had evidence to back them up. A hint of truth. What kind of child knew to do that? Father’s question was another jab at her.

“Yeah, my roommate June has been really nice to me,” Jester answered, ignoring the fact that June barely spoke to her. Out of the corner of her eye she could see Jesse watching her, head tilted to the side. Before Father could question her more about June she elaborated. “She’s fourteen, has short red hair, and likes to exercise. Every morning she wakes up and stretches, it's impressive how well she stays on routine.” Honestly Jester didn’t know anything else about June.

“It’s nice to see you making connections dear,” he answered. His calm, normal attitude was setting Jester on edge further. She knew he was angry, he had to be, Mother was silent. Soft classical music filled the car and no one dared to speak for the rest of the ride. Jester could hear father humming along to the songs. Mother never turned away from the windshield. Jesse, the least aware, was relaxed enough to fall asleep. His head rested on the side of the car door and there was a slight smile on his face. Jester wished that she could feel that way, yet a selfish part of her wanted him to be awake, as scared as she was. She wanted him to hold her hand and whisper to her that it would be okay. But she’d never take away Jesse's ignorance, not just because Mother and Father told her not to, but because he deserved to be happy. If Jesse knew he’d be like Jester, and the world already had too many jesters.

Once they were parked in the driveway Jester managed to move her stiff limbs and get out of the car. Father got out of the driver's seat but left the door open. Mother came around the front of the car and looked at Jester for a moment. Jester looked into her Mother’s pretty blue eyes, far different from Jester’s dark green, and pleaded silently for Mother to stay. Mother didn't react however, she stared a moment longer before giving Father a peck on the cheek and getting into the car. Jester was forced to watch her last hope run away from her until it became a mere dot in the distance. The thought that that was the last time she’d ever see Jesse occurred to her, but she had to brush it aside when a hand landed on her shoulder.

“Let’s go inside dear, we have so much to talk about,” Father’s voice was even more overly cheery than it had been in the car. His grip on her shoulder tightened with each step towards the horse to the point where Jester was sure there would be a bruise in the morning. Once the door was closed behind them he shoved her to the floor. She only managed to get to her knees before he kicked her in the ribs lifting her off the ground and twirling through the air twice before hitting the carpet elbow first. Every breath was like slamming a hammer on your finger every time the hammer went down. Despite the pain her body still made her sob. “Shut up, we both knew this was coming.” All traces of happiness was gone from his voice, replacing it was a tone one would use on an escaped pet rat that pooped on the floor. It was a tone Jester heard many times before.

“I know you thought that you’d have more time before this happened, but that’s your problem. You underestimated how much I care about you, or how much power I have. I doubt that you’re that stupid though, to think the latter,” Father went on pacing around her prone body. Jester stayed on the ground, trying to silence her wet breaths. His eyes made the back of her head burn but she didn’t dare look up. He preferred her face in the carpet she was sure.

‘You’re about the age when kids begin rebelling against their parents, so I understand why you purposely failed. It’s my job as your parent to let you know that this behavior is unacceptable though, and will not be tolerated. I’ve already proven by creating this holiday that I can bring you home whenever I want, as long as I want. Nothing has changed from when you went to Basics. You do as I say, or you’ll be punished. I’ll make this lesson memorable so you’ll never forget it,” and with that final word he kicked her in the ribs again, and again, stepping forward whenever he made her body roll away from him. When he tired of that he pulled her to her feet by her hair and dragged her to the kitchen and slammed her head on the table. When he finally let her hair go she collapsed to the floor seeing double. She could hear him walking away and grabbing something off the counter before his four feet came into her confused vision. He lifted up the bottom of her shirt exposing her stomach.

“A reminder to help you remember this lesson,” he whispered to her gently before carving into her skin with a knife. When she tried to scream he covered her mouth with his right hand and leaned his weight on it to keep him steady. It had all been too much, the pain, fear, and Jester blacked out.

The rest of the holiday she spent confined to her room. A family doctor with a strong healing power came and mended her broken ribs but left the bruises and sliced skin. Her stomach was wrapped in bandages so she couldn’t see what Father had done to her. Father came in her room and made sure that she understood that all these injuries she had came from falling down the stairs, and that no one would see them when she went back to school. Jesse fretted over her at first but Mother was taking advantage of every second she could, to be with him, leaving Jester alone. Father bought her one meal a day with a smile and a comment about how he was glad that he got this out of the way before Jester had done any real damage. How her little act of rebellion could actually make his plans easier in the end.

*    *    *

The ride to school Jester had been silent. She didn’t speak the entire day. Now, in the dark dorm room she sat alone. Her stomach throbbed. She lifted up her top and traced her finger along the places where it hurt the worse. The lines of pain came together in her mind and she realized that he had etched the number fifteen, her section, into her. Fifteen would be with her forever. This dark broken place was hers now, and she could never be rid of it.

#learn to be #TW child abuse #tw violence #tw dissociation #tw carving #tw victim blaming #writeblr

[doomedandstoned]

Maryland Doomers Yatra Begin Conquest of Europe

~By Mel Lie~

It is a typical late summer afternoon here in Northern Germany. Sun and clouds alternate in a rush and a harsh wind blows around the corners. I'm sitting outside in my favorite deck chair, burying my ears deep into the latest album 'Death Ritual' (2019) by Maryland-based band YATRA. This ritual carries me into the best mood as I prepare to interview this impressive doom trio.

It was a blend of mythical, heavy, pitch black doom vibes and mountainous riffs, excellently paired with Stein-Schlag drumming and harsh vocals from a skull dipped in the blackest ash, that accompanied my dissection of the band, comprised of singer Dana Helmuth, bassist Maria Geisbert and drummer Sean Lafferty.

The more of myself I sunk into Yatra's sound, the better I understood the band's mission to spread their doom-ridden plaque to the farthest reaches the planet.

Yatra's journey began earlier this year with the immensely well-received debut album Death Ritual on Grimoire Records and continued with a momentous tour across various stages along both coasts of the US, hitting festivals like Grim Reefer Fest, Ode To Doom, New England Stoner & Doom Fest II, Monolith On The Mesa, and Electric Funeral Fest, among others. But that‘s not all! Yatra have taken their song "Sailing On" quite literally. In October, they’ll storm Europe supporting Poland's atmospheric-doom heavyweight Sunnata, hailing over to Norway, Sweden, Denmark, the Czech Republic, Italy, France -- bringing Into The Void Fest in the Netherlands, Desertfest Antwerp in Belgium, and the Satellite and South Doom I festivals in Germany to their knees.

Yatra intend to continue on towards world domination, recently dropping word that a second album is in the making, releasing later this year. It‘s still too early to give details about that, but maybe the trio will leave some information in the course of the interview that follows.

Long story short, I'm thrilled that I could catch the trio in the midst of their immense journey and talk with them about their tour and future plans.

Death Ritual by Yatra

An Interview with Yatra

I'm pleased as punch to meet up with you here, guys! Your activities this year have been incredibly impressive. It looks like you have both feet on the gas pedal! What is it that spurred you onlong on this intrepid journey?

We are happy to meet you, too, and very excited to play in Europe! Thanks for the kind words and I guess we can only say that we really believe in ourselves and Yatra, and we are extremely hard workers. Maybe it’s focus and passion together that are the two feet on the gas pedal you mentioned.

Due to your huge US tour, your band life is pinned around the clock. I imagine this costs a lot of energy and requires a lot of stamina. How do you recharge your batteries to keep it up?

The shows and the people really get us excited and motivated. In the US there are some big open spaces and sometimes we have ten hour drives from one night's show to the next. It’s that desire to want to rock again for another crowd that makes it worthwhile to us.

What impressions have you "brought home" from your numerous gigs and festivals in the US?

We have made lots of great new friends and had countless fun and crazy experiences.

Is there a special strange or funny thing in your mind that you have witnessed while touring?

Oh man, every day for us! (laughs) We’ve gotten lost in caves, have met skinwalkers in the desert, gotten attacked by mutant coyotes in California, talked to giant seals on the pacific cliffs, woken up with buffalo in the mountains. We live it to the fullest, every day.

In October, Europe will see you for the first time live on stage at various concerts and damn cool festivals. Hell, yes! Wait, I have to prepare confetti rain, drum rolls, and hellish fireworks! How does that feel to you and what do you have in the luggage for European fans?

Yes! We are really stoked to play on European stages and bring our heavy metal to everyone that comes out. We will be playing mostly the new album and are very excited about it and the responses we got from these new songs on our last US tour. It’s going to be a great tour!

After completing your monstrous road trip, will we then find you cocktail sipping in the South Sea Islands? (laughs) We are chomping at the bit to learn of future plans in the pipeline for the remaining months of the year 2019. You have dropped the word that there will be another album recording? Can we elicit you some information about it?

Yes, I think we will have a two week tour at the end of November, but not positive on the details. And yes, last month we completed a new full-length album of eight songs for STB Records, entitled Blood of the Night, which will be released in January worldwide on vinyl and CD, as well as all digital formats. There will also be some special edition vinyl. We recorded with Kevin Bernsten at Developing Nations and it was mastered by James Plotkin. It sounds really great. STB will also be re-releasing our first album Death Ritual in the future, which we are almost sold out of the first pressing.

Now, feel free to give few concluding words for our listeners and your fans on the way out.

We are really looking forward to this tour! We haven’t had any of our records or t-shirts or any merchandise available anywhere in Europe, so it’s great that people will be able to get that stuff on this tour without paying ridiculous shipping from the US. We hope to get to talk with and meet as many people before and after shows as we can, don’t be shy. See you out there!

Thank you guys for taking the time to answer our curious questions here. We are looking forward to you implementation of further world domination plans! Have a great time in the EU. We hope it will be a blast!

South Doom I in Hamburg

By Simon Ballnat, organizer

I'm eminently pleased that Yatra will also spread their doom-ash vibes over the first South Doom at Hamburg's Stellwerk in Northern Germany, my home county! This event is something new and special of its kind and may be a signpost for the heavy underground scene in Hamburg! I got the opportunity to catch Simon Ballnath, one of the supporting heads of the heavy music scene in Hamburg and co-organizer of South Doom I, in my clutches. He will give us more information about this project.

For a few years now, the stoner rock, doom metal, and heavy music scene overall has grown and grown in several cities in Germany. Stoner-doom is perhaps the only underground subgenre of metal that has become mainstream without selling out. A huge amount of national and international bands take big efforts and commitments to present their music all over Europe, especially in Germany's biggest cities Berlin and Hamburg, where the sound is popular like never before. For those bands, it's sometimes very hard to fill their tour schedule with midweek gigs, so the bigger cities are attractive in that they have the venue infrastructure and population density to offer shows to those hungry musicians in the middle of the week.

On the one hand, it's fine for those bands to avoid off-days and find some place to perform and maybe sometimes a place to sleep for free, but there is a dark side to those big cities. On the other hand, a lot of bigger bands stop there to play shows, too, and in Hamburg you can visit a stoner-rock, doom metal, or heavy blues concert nearly every night. This overdose of shows leads to a disregard and devaluing of the most awesome small shows in lousy little venues for up and coming bands.

South Doom with Sunnata and Yatra is the first collaboration of promoters with fanatical supporters of these scenes. The Droneburg, which offers a yearly recurring festival for doom, sludge, and other outlying subgenres, works together with small, non-venue promoters like Brandlaut, Desert Hazard, and the Plattenkiste a local record store which is known for their in-store gigs and support of the local metal scene in Hamburg.

The Stellwerk in the south part of Hamburg offers the venue, takes the main part of the organization of the show, and a lot of volunteers are also involved in this project. In the last ten years, there was no liaison of this kind in Hamburg and its hopefully not the last time different promoters and actors in this great scene work together to bring you some amazing bands -- keep an eye out for South Doom II!

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#D&S Interivews #Yatra #Ocean City #Maryland #STB Records #Doom #Metal #Mel Lie #Doomed & Stoned

[mrkwonandmrchoibabygirl]

G-Dragon, a member of South Korean boy band BIGBANG, changed the title song of his new solo album, according to his agency Thursday, most likely to avoid controversy over the provocative name.

The title song of G-Dragon’s album “Kwon Ji Yong,” which comes out Thursday evening, has been changed from “Bullshit” to “Untitled,” according to YG Entertainment. Earlier this month, YG had announced that the title track was “Bullshit.”

YG didn’t offer an explanation as to why the rapper-singer switched the title song. But observers speculate that the artist may have decided to place the provocative hip-hop track on the back burner to avoid controversy, especially in light of band mate T.O.P’s recent marijuana scandal and drug overdose.

T.O.P was hospitalized Tuesday from an apparent overdose of benzodiazepine, a day after he was indicted without detention on charges of smoking marijuana. He is suspected of smoking the banned substance four times with a 21-year-old female trainee singer at his home in Seoul in October last year.

According to the company, “Untitled” is a slow-tempo track that sings of longing for a love to return after a breakup.

Kwon Ji-yong is G-Dragon’s real name. As the title suggests, the album has an autobiographical aspect to it, with lyrics focused on G-Dragon’s personal character and growing pains as he is about to enter his 30s.

“It’s not an album meant to produce another hit song but rather he filled it with the music and lyrics that he wanted to produce and tell,” a YG representative said.

For the album’s physical retail copy, G-Dragon decided to ditch the traditional CD format and release it on a USB drive.

“Alongside digital copies, G-Dragon is selling the album in a USB format. Customarily CDs are produced for sales of physical copies but we opted for a differentiating strategy,” YG said.

Debuting as a BIGBANG member in 2006, the singer made a solo debut in 2009 with “Heartbreaker.” He has since released two more albums: “One of a kind” in 2012 and “Coup d’etat” in 2013.

Following the release of the new album, the singer is to begin a concert tour of 19 cities around the world in Seoul on Saturday. Source bigbang updates

I kind of understand where YG is coming from with this they have enough controversy to handle so I’m not mad about it

#choi seunghyun #lee seunghyun #seunghyun #t.o.p #g dragon #g damn #gdragon #gd #bigbang gd #bigbang top #taeyang #seungri #daesung #bigbang vip #bigbang #yg #yg entertainment #kwonjiyong #jiyong #jiyong kwon #g dragon album

[aeriverse]

[ARTICLE!] "New Records Set While Surrounded by Danger, The Five Year Bittersweet History of EXO"#FiveYearsWithEXO

Aeriverse Translation Team 38sr and YeyeWalkways

[OSEN] "New Records Set While Surrounded by Danger, The 5 Year Bittersweet History of EXO" 

Boy group EXO is a team that stands out even during times of crisis. In order to make a better future, EXO has a promising trend of becoming stronger. On April 8th, it’s EXO 5th debut anniversary. In 2012 , EXO debuted in Korea as while as in China Along with Japan and foreign countries, as the time went on EXO has made great achievements. EXO is a group that creates new music that attracts attention and leads to new records, making the group into idols that produce hit songs. #2012, The Emergence of a New Boy Group

EXO’s debut was fresh. In Korea, EXO-K did activities while EXO-M promoted in China. Before EXO performed as 12 members, EXO-K and EXO-M were a way to distinguish their identities. On January 30, 2012 they released a prologue single followed by their first mini album on April 9th, announcing their brilliant debut. The title song MAMA was released in both Korean and Chinese and each team started it’s activities as SM’s new boy group. That year, EXO won the New Artist Award and became a group that would lead a new Hallyu wave. #2013, The Beginning of History

In 2013, it was an unforgettable year for EXO. As 12 members, EXO released XOXO and became a huge hit. The 12 member group became a million seller and of course became incredibly popular in Korea. Outside of EXO’s fandom, EXO’s name was known and everyone listened to their music. EXO’s repackage album title track Growl made records. The song was first place on both music charts and music shows for a long time in the first few weeks. When the new song was announced, the first album achieved one million album sales, making EXO the first group in 12 years since god to sell one million album copies through the first regular album and repackaged version. In the digital music market, EXO’s strength was demonstrated. Also, Growl is by far EXO's the most famous song. The song had the power of sweeping up all the prizes at awards ceremonies.

#2014, A Crisis and Even Bigger Leap

Of course, during times of success there was a crisis. After EXO’s first full-length album release, EXO was focused on their activities and actions. In June of 2014, EXO released their second mini album Overdose and soon after Chinese member Kris filed a lawsuit against SM. In the wake of a upcoming crisis, Chinese member Luhan left the group without authorization and soon filed a lawsuit in October.

But EXO became even more strong. Outside of Kris, the members continued their activities. EXO-K and EXO-M continued to enjoy their explosive popularity and ranking first in various categories. Also, EXO successfully opened their first solo concert at the Olympic Park Gymnastics Stadium. After the lawsuit of that year, Kris and Luhan’s lawsuits with SM’s exclusive contract was announced to be valid up until 2022 as the original contract stated. #2015, The Unchanging Big Trend Even in the middle of a crisis, EXO calmly continued their activities as a big trend when another crisis hit: the 3rd member to leave by breaking their contract. As EXO started promoting their 2nd full album in March 2015, Tao began establishing a new studio as a solo artist in China and left the team. Though he showed love and affection during the news conferences for their comeback at the time, this incident occurred only a short time afterwards.

Though the leaving of a third member could have been a difficult unstable time for EXO, instead they only became more united. They continued their activities and remained as one of the top groups as always despite the division between EXO-K and EXO-M becoming less significant. The title track of their 2nd full album 'CALL ME BABY' became another huge hit, and the song 'LOVE ME RIGHT' from the repackaged album continued their 1st place streak. In particular, combined with their success from their 1st full album EXO achieved the title of Two-Time Million Seller, marking this year as the year EXO proved their unchanging underlying strength as one of the best groups.

#2016, A Variety of Leaps and Bounds Last year, EXO met their fans through more diverse ways than before. They set an amazing record as Triple Million Sellers through their 3rd full album 'EX'ACT' and carried out their activities in style. It was a record that would be unbroken by others, and would continue to be built upon in the future. They achieved 1st place on the United World Chart, a chart operated by Media Traffic which counts album sales across the entire world, storming not only Korea's domestic charts but charts overseas as well.

From their 'Dancing King' collaboration with MBC's variety show 'Infinity Challenge' to their Special Winter Album, they met their fans through their many many activities. In particular, Xiumin, Baekhyun, and Chen tried something new through their formation of EXO's first subunit EXO-CBX. D.O., as well as Chanyeol, Suho, and Baekhyun took on acting roles, showing different sides of EXO and making 2016 a year when EXO made leaps forward in multiple areas. They also set a new record for receiving Daesangs for four consecutive years, earning the nickname as the 'Wall That Cannot Be Overcome". #2017, the Beginning of New Records EXO, who is celebrating their 5th anniversary, is continuing their special activities. For starters, Baekhyun is planned to release a solo song as part of SM STATION. Especially of note is EXO's 3rd Concert Tour Encore Performances scheduled to happen the 27th-28th of next month at the Seoul Olympic Stadium.

As EXO reaches their 5th Anniversary since their debut, not only has the scale of their concerts increased accordingly but their uniqueness has grown even more so. This will be a performance where the spectacular performances that only EXO can pull off will grow even more. As performances and members' individual various activities are being announced, their 5th Anniversary is being celebrated through special announcements and various projects. It seems this year will open the doors for their Act 2, where new records and history will be made. [Post Response: +601] Top Comments: "Even if they might fall later, they will be a household name for a long long time. They revived the physical album market, and their fandom has over 3.9 million members, they're a group that will be unparalleled both now and in the future." [+658][-3] "Congratulations on 5 Years! Just like we have up until now, let's walk together from now on ♥" [+533][-2] "GODXO will be a legend far in the future" [+504][-2] "EXO Saranghaja!" [+449][-3] "EXO Saranghaja" [+410][-2] "If anyone wants to break EXO's record, first of all they have to receive Daesangs for 4 years ㅋㅋㅋㅋ" [+115][-1] "Wow... Now that I read this, EXO is really an amazing group. I hope that EXO will continue to win victory after victory in the future^^~" [+100][-1] "We are one! EXO Saranghaja❤" [+90][-1] "The steps to becoming a legend far in the future" [+83][-1] "EXO Saranghaja" [+83][-1] "GODXO is my pride and joy!" [+76][-1] "I'm cheering for you EXO, let's go for a long time" [+74][-1] "The steps to becoming a legend in the future~ EXO you've worked hard in 2016! And in 2017, as expected of EXO!! Hwaiting Hwaiting! Let's walk on a flowery path in the future too~ >.< Hwaiting for your concert rehearsals!!" [+73][-1] "It feels like the central point of Lee Sooman's plan was that at least one of the members would be your type.. I hope they last long" [+73][-1] "As expected of EXO" [+71][-1] "Congratulations EXO on your 5th Anniversary, let's be together in the future for 10 years, 50 years ❤ EXO'rDium Hwaiting ❤❤" [+68][-1]

#exo #fiveyearswithexo #fifthanniversary #chen #jongdae #chanyeol #baekhyun #xiumin #minseok #sehun #yixing #lay #suho #junmyeon #kyungsoo #jongin #kai #ot9

[pjstafford]

How the light Gets in? Brief Impressions.

How the Light Gets in Brief Impressions of the written works of David Duchovny Written work includes: The X-Files: The Unnatural The X-Files: Hollywood A.D. House of D (Movie) Holy Cow (Novel)) Bucky Fucking Dent (Novel) Hell or HighWater (Album)) This is in many ways simply a fan letter musings to the writer, David Duchovny. Most known for his acting in the X-Files and Californication, the quality of his writing in his albums and two novels surprised me. I had been a fan of the X-Files in the day, but had rarely thought about the show or its stars since the 2008 “I Want to Believe.”. I could honestly say in 2015 that I had never watched anything David Duchovny appeared in outside of the X-Files. It was the X-File season ten filming that convinced me to watch the original episodes again. Mostly out of curiosity, I listened to Duchovny’s album. As I am a sucker for break up albums and I found it derivative of my favorite Bob Dylan Album “Blood on the Tracks” I listened to it on repeat in a way I had not listened to an album since college. Much like “Blood on the Tracks” my favorite song off the album changes daily and in each listening I find new interpretations to the lyrics. I read “Holy Cow” only realizing near the conclusion that I had read it too swiftly and had missed its more serious meaning. I returned to the beginning to read it again. By that time, watching the ninth season of the X-Files, I was missing Mr. Duchovny and so watched Aquarius. Then, I was hooked- Californication, Goats, New Year’s Day, The Rapture, Phantom, The Secret, and guest appearances. BFD came out. He went on an European tour and the Duchovniacs posted videos on you tube and a 55 year old fan girl was born. The last time I was a fan girl I was seven and wrote Bobby Sherman a letter. I fought the fandom’s pull, but I am lost to its power now. While I love his acting and he is a gorgeous man, I think I would be over it by now if I was not first and foremost a fan of Duchovny’s written works- eagerly anticipating a second album and a third novel. He is, as he says, a man of words. If I had to choose between further acting projects or more of his words, I would choose his words. His writing for whatever format-television, movie,novel or lyrics- all seem to me to have a similar quality which is unique and distinct to him. I have been describing it as a sweet quality. Each work seems to me to be almost a fairy tale as I am involved in experiencing it. I am left at the end with an uplifted feeling of hope. I am secured in the knowledge that the world is good. Then, away from the experience of the work, I think about it dispassionately and realize the sweet, fairy tale fantasy is utterly and completely ridiculous when you look at the themes of his work objectively. BFD is about the death of a father. Holy Cow about a cow learning she is destined to be slaughtered and eaten. House of D involves a women’s correctional facility and a mother’s overdose. The fan favorite X-Files, the Unnatural, has the Klan riding out to kill a black baseball player who dared to play a game against white men- and the alien bounty hunter is among them. Hollywood AD really is the opposite of a fairy tale. It is about complete disillusionment. It is about disillusionment of childhood heroes, of the reality that the sixties didn’t end how we wanted, that the church doesn’t have the answers, that your work could suspend you on a whim for a mistake, and that what we see in Hollywood is ridiculous and sublime- which isn’t a big deal to me- but might be if you had spent 8 years in one part in Hollywood amassing a fortune and now ponder if the work was worthwhile. Just listing the themes is exhausting and depressing. Then, I think David Duchovny must be the world’s most morose and melancholy man to pick these themes. Wonder if he’s a downer at parties. No, I bet he’s a blast at parties because remember he is sweetness, hope, providing security that the world is good. How can he be both things and do them both simultaneously so well? It is important to note that he doesn’t pick depressing themes and then sugar coat them in sweetness and nice. I am not saying that at all. He seeks out the darkness. He deals with the darkness head on and serves it up with all the ugliness it contains. He doesn’t hide from it. He stands with his demons on the map of the world wondering if he closed his eyes forever if he could see what he want to see not sure how to get off the goddamned dead end road. He jumps into the primordial ooze with the same determined obsession that causes Mulder to chase aliens. It is just that, in his case, after the plunge, what bubbles up to the top of the ooze, grows feet to walk and then wings to fly above it all, is this sweetness and lightness which is every bit as truthful as the darkness. So the alien becomes a man, the zombies dance in a graveyard, the child returns to New York from Paris a man, a cow discovers there’s no place like home, the losers are celebrated, we’ll beat the devil and it will always be raining in this song. He does this in a way that is not Disney, is not saccharine, is not a plot device and is in no way incongruous in the storyline. I know of no other writer who accomplishes this in quite the same way. This is his uniqueness and his gift. What makes it interesting is that somewhere always is the story of how the sweetness occurs because of, not in despite of, the darkness. How that happens is not always clear, not always defined, but it is always contained in the story or the song. The thing we are left to ponder and the reason we want to return is this question asked and answered time and time again: How does the light get in? Now, not much criticism in this brief review and I can always find something to criticize. Are the plot devices sometimes not quite believable, does Hollywood AD try to do too much, are saguaro cactus in Roswell, NM the true alien? There is nothing perfect. Those musings will have to come on another day. Right now I am crossing the Brooklyn Ferry with Walt Whitman on a spliff the side of a canoe, watching zombies dancing in the cemeteries, riding a bicycle with my family, hitting a baseball with a strong man’s arms around me, seeing the light from a star that died long ago, loving the losers, Sugar Magnolia playing in my head.

[otftoverdoselaz-blog]

Writing a Rap Song

Understanding how to write rap songs requires an understanding of the fundamentals. Each rap song has a beat, hook, and verses, however there are many additional things relevant to writing a rap tune. Each tune, while it is hip hop, rap, R&B, or a different genre, includes a style or pattern that's normal to each song.

The standard element to remember while trying to understand how to compose a rap song is the beat. Every rap has a beat. It might vary based on the sort of tune the artist wants to make, and it can be exhausting accordingly. Not all raps are angry and full of violent beats and hooks; there are rap songs that are written to others and electronic dance beats that are happy rather than filled with harsh words and lyrics. Every rap tune has three basic components - the hook or chorus, intro, and verses. It is.

There are various ways as to how a rap song may start. When functioning on how best to compose a rap tune, writers attempt to experiment with different beginnings to ascertain that will suit the song the best. Raps begin with an instrumental bit that's followed with a verse or two. But depending upon the rap artist, the song can start right with the hook which leads to the instrumental, which can be followed closely by the first verse. Dependent on the sort of tune the artist is hoping to compose, the amount of poetry and arrangement of the components varies.

A few songs have 32 bars each and four verses, although on average, most rap songs consist of three verses. It is dependent upon the lyrics and beat of this rap. The verse is the part that's lyrics or the actual rap or vocals. This is the part which contains the majority of the lyrics and in which the song's meaning is portrayed to the audience. Usually, the several verses in the song have the same length, but this isn't a requirement. The duration of poetry might differ if the beats of the song fluctuates.

Writing a rap tune demands an understanding of the fundamentals of rap song composing. The requirements of composing rap creating hook and a strong back beat that maintains the interest of listeners, and comprise understanding of approaches, of first lyrics. Rap consists of rhymed couplets, which are set into a bass beat and drum. Possessing a rhyming flow and technique is crucial to writing a rap tune.

Lyrically, the first step to writing a rap tune is to choose a topic. The topic serves as the central subject of the rap song. It could be about just about anything, or pain, love, joy, greed, racism, justice, partying.

The beat is essential to writing a rap song. Lyricists write their lyrics to the beat, but the lyrics are written by others first and then make the track. A fantastic bass beat can actually break or make a rap song. A musician can create a fantastic bass beat using bass guitar or an electronic drum loop. It's this bass beat that pushes the entire rap trail along with the lyrical flow. The rapper needs to keep up with the bass beat.

There is A hook essential to form the chorus of the rap song. Lyrics should be composed with all the bass beat and the scheme that was selected in concert. Lyrics are regarded as the power of a rap. Lyrics are the feature of rap, which makes different rap songs stand apart from others, even the ones that possess the exact instrumental beat.

After composing the lyrics, structuring is required by composing a rap song. This involves interspersing the poetry together with the chorus and incorporating bridges or breakdowns to add depth. Lyrics are recorded over verses, the bass beat, chorus, and bridge. The addition of punch lines may be used to add an additional level supplying comedy and entertainment. Drum fills such as additional beats of melody and bass lines may be inserted into the rap to add depth.

To compose rap tunes, you'll need to customize your rap lyrics and listen to and examine rap artists and songs that are popular. An ideal Mix of rhyme scheme, word play punch lines, melody, and bass beats that are catchy, will end in a popular rap song. Rappers work and collaborate to compose a draft rap song.

By following some writing steps of pattern and construction writing a rap song, can be achieved. Rap as a genre may appear limited by a predefined set of beats and verses, but there is a lot more that goes to a rap tune than those few components. Each rap song has components that are common to each of songs, no matter the genre or artist. As an example, each rap has a whip, hook, chorus, and verses; it's these components that differs to artist's arrangement.

Ordinarily, when writing a rap song, the artist will begin before writing the lyrics and vocal tracks, by working. This is because when the beat that is instrumental is finished, it's usually simpler to write lyrics to the beat that than simply writing the lyrics first and then attempting to develop. Most raps include bass line and a drum monitor that plays together with the beat. Because the portion of a rap is the track, especially not parts are required.

However, rap tunes are becoming collaborative and more experimental, and lots of artists collaborate with other rappers. This leads to a last product that's a blend of 2 distinct rap styles which should complement one another. In addition, it creates a fresh style and makes the song writing process more manageable and intriguing as every artist has a unique perspective.

Along with bass lines and all the tracks, a rap tune samples loops of tracks by other artists. Such samples coating over the instrumental tracks to add yet another dimension. This brings about a combination of two different genres which collaborate for writing a rap song with all of the elements of a classic rap, together with the defeat, hook, and poetry as well as a looped sample trail that provides a new layer into the rap song.

Composing a rap song demands practice and editing. In all probability, your first draft will be mediocre at best. That is nice and will be expected. Just rewrite, OT ft Overdose Laz - BMO reorganize, and rework it until you achieve the desired affect. You might hire a rap writer and editor to help turn your rough draft into a song that is completed.

You can write your own rap song if you have a skills needed in order to achieve that. The main skill that you will require is a fantastic creativity or thought process. Other abilities include knowing about rap songs, being able to concentrate and using a format that is great. Having an imagination is important when it comes time to write your own rap song since you'll need to come up which we will want to obey.

There are so many rap music out there on the market nowadays and it is tough at times to come up with something that's unique and fresh. You need. For this, you want to use your imagination. You don't wish to decide on the standard rap lyrics that everybody else is currently using. The unique and imaginative your rap lyrics are, the greater chance your rap tune will probably have of making it. This entails a thought process that is fantastic.

Next, when you compose your own rap song, write them in a format that will be easy for you to follow and you'll need to think out your lyrics. There are lots of ways that you'll be able to create a format the best approach is to write each stage of the tune out based on the order that each phase will look. Starting with the title, you'd write your own rap tune from start to finish as though it were an article. Including your chorus and verses. Write each step as you come to it you aren't overwhelmed.

You should be familiar with the hottest rap songs in The audio business and the artists that created them. This can help you to know what songs are effective and which ones have not. Break apart the songs and consider what's made them hot then, use your knowledge to write.

Those rappers who pride themselves on composing their own rap songs, sometimes collaborate with other writers. Whether this means bouncing ideas or having a rapper write a verse or perhaps the song, there is nothing wrong with collaboration. The ghostwriters aren't acknowledged and with the rap is performed by the rapper, although most rappers even use ghostwriters to write whole albums.

Are you interested in learning how to compose a rap song? Well if this article should have the ability to help you out and have you writing rap tunes in no time flat. As a hip-hop manufacturer I am quite knowledgeable about the process of writing rap songs. Because I feel that I have any information that others are going to benefit from I decided to share it with anybody who was ready to learn. In this article I will go over some easy steps which will help anybody who's seriously interested in figuring out how to compose a rap tune.

You must be aware that there are several ways which you may go about learning this procedure. What I am going to share with you are the measures that I currently use to make rap songs. Take advantage of or follow these steps to a tee. It's entirely up to you.

Get A Issue - Get a idea about what your song is going to be around. The mood that you are in will provide a few topic ideas to you. As an instance if you are feeling happy and at a party mood you might want to compose a song along those lines. Perhaps you are having. This may provide you with a slew of suggestions for your rap song. If you let your tune topic is determined by your mood it would be just a matter of time before you have a set topic.

Brain Storm - This is a role if not the most important part of learning how to write a rap tune. Brain storming is a fantastic way to get the creative juices flowing. I sit in my seat to get 30-45 minutes before I pick up a pen. Let thoughts flow before you begin writing anything.

Think Of A Title - Now is a great time to consider a name for your song. Now this doesn't mean that the title can't change . Selecting on a title will give you somewhat of a starting point for composing your song.

Write The Chorus/Hook - before I begin writing the verses I like to write the chorus of the song. I do this because it really helps me to determine exactly what the lyrics would be. There is a good idea to really feel the beat out and then write your hook to fit if you're writing to some beat. You ought to be aware that in many case the hook is what makes or breaks a song, so when creating yours, take your time.

Compose Your Verses - I usually advise writing 2-3 verses, rather 3 When it comes to writing a rap tune. Your are verses each would normally be if you are going to use 2 verses they should be longer then. A verse usually is made up of 16 bars (a set of rhyming sentences = I bar). Make sure that you are writing them to fit your chorus when writing your verses. Your fundamental song arrangement goes hook, verse, hook, poetry, intro, verse and hook. Of course this arrangement can be altered by you . Be certain it sounds to out the normal.

Twist It Up - Now that your song is completely written you need to go on it. You want to be certain that your lyrics make because and that your hook is ideal for the song. Do not wait over your song a few times before you record it on your own or promote it. Learning does not need to be tough and hopefully that is hopefully proven by this article.

[ivan-dubs]

B O N E S   PaidProgramming Review

Hi everyone, Teamthany Seshtano here, Teen Ink’s busiest music nerd and it’s time for a classic review of the 2013 Bones mixtape, PaidProgramming. Elmo O’ Connor other wise known as Bones, or Th@ Kid if you’re looking at his earlier work,  is a Michigan/ California rapper, part of the independent label known as TeamSesh and a part of the underground rap group SeshHolloWaterBoyz. This is the 29th tape under his belt and this isn’t really not an ordinary Bones tape because this is where, at least for me, where Bones started to really define a new image for himself. Even though it’s still in the style of his three previous tapes, those tapes being CRACKER, SCUMBAG, and CREEP, the overall concept of the album is what really draws me in and how interesting it is. The concept being of I guess just sitting in your home, late at night and just watching the Paid Programming portion of a certain channel.

The Album kicks off with the title track, which is a very somber and mysterious instrumental, with a clap sample once in awhile. It’s almost like you’re visualizing a grainy city background covered in fog, at least that’s I visualized, still pretty decent instrumental nonetheless. Now the next track titled JonathanTaylorThomas, is the first song that Bones actually raps and it seems to be about those whom Bones dislikes trying to be on his level, comparing them a to a young Jonathan Taylor Thomas. Saying how they’ll never actually earn respect or money doing what they’re doing and eventually end up dead in game by the hands of Bones, adding onto the song however, is Bones going even harder on this person saying how nobody is going to miss him and how they memory of the person will slowly fade into obscurity or even to the point where the man’s parents lied to his face about making it in life.

Just a bit of a disclaimer, there are quite a few references to drugs and money in Bones’ music, though he does make sure there is a decent variety of songs with differing subjects. The third song here titled WakingUpCrying, which is about I guess having some sort of smoking session with a girl he met though it does devolve into a bit of bragging when he talks about riding off in a yacht with a swimming pool on the top or how he’s a slim young pimp with twenty beepers on his hip. That is until Jonny Telafone comes in with some very tear stained and somber vocals, crying for the girl that Bones is with, wondering what else to do as he soaks his pillows with his tears. The next song up which I personally enjoy, titled RotatingBed sort of brings it back to concept of the album a bit with the beat and overall tone. The song is about Bones missing a girl and how his life really isn’t complete without her in his life, stating how he doesn’t how to act or to be sane when she isn’t around.

Sorry if the format seems a little repetitive, I’m just trying to do a short review of each song so bear with me a little bit. So, the next song titled Dial-Up seems to have a more mean mugging vibe to it while also taking place in two separate years it seems. Bones is in 2003 talking with someone’s girl on Nextel phone in a black Mercedes Benz jeep. While the guest feature on the song by Na$ty Matt is about him being in 2005, having casual sex with a few girls like they’ve had their tubes tied and riding in a Mercedes Benz with a machete on his side referring to himself as a dirtbag which is sort of fitting by the content of his lyrics. The next song in the track listing titled AmericanBeauty actually samples the movie that it’s named after, it’s the final quote of the movie actually before the character played by Kevin Spacey, is embracing his own death, which Bones likes to do in his music. After that however, Bones starts to go into a brag rap direction, talking about he has the dope and the flow, though the chorus oddly enough is the same chorus from Aaron Carter’s song, How I beat shaq. He then goes on to describe his day as he wakes up, wondering how much time he could kill as he rolls his first ‘bone’. Then the song devolves into Bones talking about how other’s aren’t as good as him or his label.

Now another thing to sort of bear with in this review is that Bones, like many other rappers, enjoys talking about how successful he is which isn’t a bad thing at all as long as you keep the song interesting. Next song in the tracklisting is called 281-330-8004, which is Mike Jones’ old personal number from 2005. In the song he talks about how he’s got friends that don’t talk to him because he I guess he would rather silently communicate than draw attention to themselves. Describing his popularity as Macaulay Culkin’s back in 1992 which makes sense in the popularity sense though doesn’t really make much sense in the way he got that popularity. The next cut on the album is 7DayOutlook, which samples an old weather channel ad fitting back in with the theme and concept of the album.  Fellow Sesh member Dylan Ross is on this track for hook, telling those frauds in his life to stay out of it, telling them that because of them he no longer has any love to give. Bones then gets into his verse, saying how he doesn’t wear brand name clothes and wears his label’s merch(which you can get here >>http://teamsesh.bigcartel.com/<<), and also listens to his own music because he feels that rappers today aren’t up to his level. A more somber track up next titled Cut and seems to be about Bones deeply missing this girl to the point where he can’t think straight, as his mind fills with feelings of regret and sadness. Looking back on his memories with her, hoping that this girl feels the same when she thinks about him. He even retraces his steps at one point, however those he meets on the way don’t satisfy him, knowing they can’t relate to his situation. Eventually he wishes for death, know that he’ll never see her again.

The next song in the track listing titled FlashFloodWatch is about those who hate on Bones but still listen to his music. However Bones knows of this and begins to tear into these ‘secret fans’, seeing their hate as them throwing him in the water and just watching him sink to the bottom. Bones then talks about how these ‘secret fans’ don’t really know what he’s like as they’ve never been or seen a live show, however it comes back to sort of that brag rap style at the end of the song which is to be sort of expected. The next song, which is a vocal performance rather than a rap song is called TeenageBoy now, if you don’t know already, Bones is a pretty talented singer at times at least for me. He’s even got a little side project with Sesh Producer Greaf called surrenderdorothy where it’s just vocals, though I can see why people wouldn’t like this song or any other sad Bones song because, most now come to get hyped up and it’s unique to that variety again in Bones’ music but I digress. The track begins with a sample from the Adam Sandler movie the wedding singer, before singing about him and a girl, which is pretty formulaic at this point but think about the song and the context it’s in. It’s like some weird kid at school who entered the talent show and sings for the girl he can’t talk because he feels that if he makes any form of contact with this girl she’ll reject him.

Next song up is titled Snow and it seems to be about Bones revisiting locations from his childhood/teenager days and seeing how much they’ve changed since he left. Though he is unsure of whether or not the roads have changed however. Up next is the song SevereWeatherWarning which is about Bones describing how these labels want him but they can’t have him, as Bones is more akin to staying an underground artist. Eventually talking about his blade and his girl near and at the end of the song. However, the song after that titled Rust is probably the most depressing song on the album in which Bones goes a more tear stained and hateful approach to missing someone. Talking about losing all the love he could give because he already wasted it on someone who really didn’t need it, saying that the person may miss him but not actually. Even though it’s sort of implied that the person Bones is talking about feels this way, as some whimpering is heard at the end. Then we hear the interlude titled 30DayFreeTrial, which is pretty catchy and pleasing after Rust. The next song is titled StoneColdStunner, features Wiccaphase on vocals, saying how girls only like him because he looks like Bones or how he feels like a leech comparing himself to basically a clone of him and nothing else. Bones then talks about how he can’t stop whatever he is doing, that probably being smoking dope and doing whatever he wants, calling out for somebody to save him.

The song up next HeavyFog is a pretty standard Bones song, talking about rolling up ‘bones’, brandishing his knife, and how his writing is flawless. The song after however Called TeenGirlDiesAtRave, I feel yet again fits back in with the concept a bit, as if say an after school special comes on TV and it’s about drug abuse. The intro on the song takes place at a night club I guess and Bones is with his friend Claire, however he finds her on the floor not breathing and comes to the conclusion that she overdosed on pills and died. Then the song kicks off with a sample from a rave song titled,”Wipe away my tears”, after a while Bones starts to get into his verse, describing the last moments of Claire’s life as she slowly dies however he diverts from this narrative near the end. However, it jumps back from the theme and concept in the song ScatteredShowers, where Bones talks about how he was always the best without ever even noticing it before and then proceeds to talk about dope and how these other rappers are too scared to follow their dreams.

GrandfathersRing is the next song, immediately talking about how he’s young and handsome like the Hansons or how doesn’t care about his image as long as he gets his ash. However at the outro, it yet again for another time comes back to the concept and theme of the tape, where it’s basically a radio traffic and weather report which will tie into the end of the album. The next song titled 2006 is about how these scared, weak rappers need to step up their overall capital. At the end talking about how you’ll never catch him in Jordans dissing snapbacks aswell. The next two songs are pretty alright in my opinion the first one being Skin, which is another song about Bones and his lust for blunts and dope. The other being Blink187 which does sample actually sample a Blink182 song known as ”All The Small things.”. Bones then begins to talk about his extravagant bathroom as he smokes a blunt, threatening those mess with his brother saying they’ll be on First 48. The song after that is CracksInTheRoad, which is about Bones partying at some sort of exotic place with strange artifacts, eventually leaving the party at the end.

The last three songs on here, two out of three are pretty standard Bones tracks aside from the very last one. 5EasyPayments pretty standard, Bones talking about smoking dope or how he dropped out and made his own music. Now the second to last song is titled DelicateHands, which is about him trying not to lose feelings for a girl, at the same time trying to express his true feelings to her. The final song on the album is more of a Ten Minute Skit than a song, it’s called Sesh Radio: Volume 1. Now before I get into this one, there are two other Sesh Radio skits on two other tapes, those being Rotten and the sequel to this tape, PaidProgramming2. So it opens with a song by an alter ego by Bones named Ricky A Go Go, before actually getting into the news portion lead by ‘Sesh anchor Kip Chiperly’. This right here this skit is what really brings out the concept and theme which I personally enjoy very much. Kip finishes the weather report in which it then fades into a poem it seems, which is sampled from an old Chanel No.5 ad.The passage finally ends, and an unknown anchor is heard talking about the local ‘Sesh Fest’ cutting to the live feed down at the scene. However, it is implied that there actually is no Sesh fest because of the phoned in yelling at the ‘event’.The feed eventually cuts out, before another Ricky song plays, talking about walking down a lonely road at night. However, the unknown anchor returns and plays the next on the ‘playlist’ titled,TimeshareCondominium, this song later lands on another Bones tape titled DeadBoy. Though I won’t be talking about this song because I’m more focused on the skit than the song in the skit(however if people want, I could review DeadBoy). The song eventually ends and another Sesh Anchor, named Bobby Hallofax, begins to take calls from listeners. The only person who calls, named Pamela, doesn’t seem to speak english however Bobby takes this as show of support. Though he stops taking calls and plays an unknown song TeamSesh song before the track finally ends.

So overall I loved the concept and the aesthetic of the album though I can see why people wouldn’t like this album. Bones seems to talk about the same thing sometimes, though he does try to keep it interesting. Mixing different styles of rapping, singing, and in some of his tapes he even full on screams. Personally though, if you want to at least try and get your friend or friends into Bones I would try this album because it’s not too strong and it’s not too light, giving you the variety of styles Bones can have on a tape. That’s I really have to say on this one, Bones, PaidProgramming, TeamSesh,  F O R E V E R.

(Also Anthony if you see this please don’t sue me)

#team sesh #teamsesh #bones #paidprogramming #seshollowaterboyz

[eyeofhorus237]

Control is a 2007 British biographical film about the life of Ian Curtis, singer of the late-1970s English post-punk band Joy Division. It is the first feature film directed by Anton Corbijn, who had worked with Joy Division as a photographer. The screenplay by Matt Greenhalgh was based on the biography Touching from a Distance by Curtis's widow Deborah, who served as a co-producer on the film. Tony Wilson, who released Joy Division's records through his Factory Records label, also served as a co-producer. Curtis' bandmates Bernard Sumner, Peter Hook, and Stephen Morris provided incidental music for the soundtrack via their post-Joy Division incarnation New Order. Control was filmed partly on location in Nottingham, Manchester, and Macclesfield, including areas where Curtis lived, and was shot in colour and then printed to black-and-white. Its title comes from the Joy Division song "She's Lost Control", and the fact that much of the plot deals with the notion that Curtis tried to remain in control of his own life, and yet had no control over his epilepsy and pharmaceutical side effects.[2]

Sam Riley and Samantha Morton star as Ian and Deborah Curtis, and the film portrays the events of the couple's lives from 1973 to 1980, focusing on their marriage, the formation and career of Joy Division, Ian's struggle with epilepsy, and his extramarital affair with Belgian journalist Annik Honoré, culminating in his May 1980 suicide. Alexandra Maria Lara plays Honoré, while James Anthony Pearson, Joe Anderson, and Harry Treadaway play Sumner, Hook, and Morris, respectively. The film also features Toby Kebbell as band manager Rob Gretton and Craig Parkinson as Tony Wilson.

Control premiered at the Cannes Film Festival on 17 May 2007 where it won several awards including the Director's Fortnight, the CICAE Art & Essai prize for best film, the Regards Jeunes Prize for best first/second directed feature film, and the Europa Cinemas Label prize for best European film in the sidebar.[3][4] It went on to win five British Independent Film Awards including Best Film, Best Director for Corbijn, Most Promising Newcomer for Riley, and Best Supporting Actor for Kebbell.[5] It was named Best Film at the 2007 Evening Standard British Film Awards, and Greenhalgh was given the Carl Foreman award for outstanding achievement in his first feature film at the 61st British Academy Film Awards.[6]

Plot

Ian Curtis and Debbie Woodruff marry in 1975 in their home town of Macclesfield at ages 19 and 18, respectively. Ian retreats from domestic life, preferring to write poetry in solitude. On June 4, 1976 they attend a Sex Pistols concert with Bernard Sumner, Peter Hook, and Terry Mason, who are starting a band. Mesmerized by the concert, Ian volunteers to be their singer. They name themselves Warsaw, and Terry moves into a managerial role with the addition of drummer Stephen Morris. The band debuts 19 May 1977 and soon rename themselves Joy Division. Ian and Debbie finance their first EP, An Ideal for Living (1978).

During his job as an employment agent, Ian witnesses a seizure suffered by Corinne Lewis. Unsatisfied with the brief mention Joy Division receives from television host Tony Wilson, Ian demands that he put the band on his programme. In April 1978 Joy Division plays a battle of bands, impressing Tony and Rob Gretton, who becomes their new manager. They perform "Transmission" on Tony's programme and sign to his Factory Records label; Tony signs the contract using his own blood.

In December 1978 Ian suffers a seizure on the way back from the band's first London gig; He is diagnosed with epilepsy and prescribed medications that leave him drowsy and moody. Learning that Corinne Lewis has died of a seizure, he pens "She's Lost Control" about her. He begins to neglect Debbie, who gives birth to their daughter Natalie in April 1979. Ian quits his job to go on tour, leaving Debbie to work and care for the baby.

Ian admits to Belgian journalist Annik Honoré that he is miserable at home and considers his marriage a mistake. The two begin having an affair during Joy Division's January 1980 European tour. On returning home, Ian tells Debbie he is unsure if he still loves her. During the rehearsing of "Love Will Tear Us Apart", Rob informs the band that they will be departing 19 May for a tour of the United States. Debbie finds evidence of Ian's infidelity and confronts him. He promises that the affair is over, but continues to see Annik during the recording of Closer in Islington.

Ian suffers a seizure mid-performance and is comforted by Annik, who admits she is falling in love with him. He attempts suicide by overdosing on phenobarbital but doctors save his life. He continues to perform, but is exhausted by the strain and overwhelmed by the audience's expectations. At a performance at the Derby Hall the stress proves too much and he is unable to go onstage. The audience riots when Alan Hempstall of Crispy Ambulance steps in to cover for Ian, and the gig is ruined. Ian tells Tony that he believes everyone hates him and that it is his own fault. When Debbie learns that Ian is still seeing Annik, she demands a divorce. Bernard attempts to use hypnotherapy on Ian, who then goes to stay with his parents. He writes to Annik admitting his fear that his epilepsy will eventually kill him, and confesses that he loves her.

On 17 May 1980, two nights before Joy Division is due to depart for America, Ian returns home and begs Debbie not to divorce him. When she refuses, he angrily orders her out of the house. After drinking alone and writing Debbie a letter, he has another seizure. Regaining consciousness the following morning, he hangs himself from the Sheila Maid in the kitchen. Debbie discovers his body and staggers into the street, crying for help. The news of Ian's death leaves the remaining Joy Division members stunned, while Tony consoles Annik. Ian's body is cremated.

Cast

Sam Riley as Ian Curtis, the main figure in the film and the vocalist of Joy Division. Riley was relatively unknown before the film, and the director initially considered Cillian Murphy for the role, but later changed his mind because he viewed Murphy as "a little shorter than Ian".[7]

Samantha Morton as Deborah Curtis, wife of Ian Curtis, whom she marries at a very young age but later in the film develops discord with her husband due to his affair with Annik. The film itself is based on Deborah's memoir on the experience with Ian Curtis and Joy Division. Though Morton dislikes biopics, she said Control was different in that she was personally a fan of Joy Division, and likes Deborah's book as well as Corbijn's photography.[8]

Alexandra Maria Lara as Annik Honoré, a journalist from Belgium and employee of the Belgian embassy. She has an affair with Ian Curtis after interviewing the band, exacerbating the tension between Ian and Deborah.

Joe Anderson as Peter Hook, the bass player of Joy Division.

Toby Kebbell as Rob Gretton, the manager of the band, succeeding Terry Mason. Kebbell provides humour and a lighter angle to the film.

Craig Parkinson as Tony Wilson, the owner of the Factory Records company that distributes Joy Division's recordings.

James Anthony Pearson as Bernard Sumner, the band's guitarist and keyboardist.

Harry Treadaway as Stephen Morris, the drummer and percussionist of Joy Division.

Andrew Sheridan as Terry Mason, the manager of the band before the arrival of Rob Gretton. (However, he still stays tour manager)

Robert Shelly as Twinny, the roadie of the band.

Matthew McNulty as Nick Jackson, Ian's high school friend, his real name was Tony Nuttall, but he didn't give a permission to Anton Corbijn to use his name.

Ben Naylor as Martin Hannett, producer and co-founder of Factory Records with Tony Wilson.

John Cooper Clarke as himself, a British performance poet who composes punk style works. In the film he performed his poem "Evidently Chickentown" in a re-creation of a 1970s concert.

Lotti Closs as Gillian Gilbert, Stephen Morris' girlfriend.

Herbert Grönemeyer portrays a Public GP in a cameo.

Richard Bremmer as Kevin Curtis, Ian's father.

#drama film

[eyeofhorus237]

The Runaways is a 2010 American biographical drama film about the 1970s rock band of the same name written and directed by Floria Sigismondi. It is based on the book Neon Angel: A Memoir of a Runawayby the band's original lead vocalist Cherie Currie. The film stars Dakota Fanning as Currie, Kristen Stewart as rhythm guitarist and vocalist Joan Jett, and Michael Shannon as record producer Kim Fowley. The Runaways depicts the formation of the band in 1975 and focuses on the relationship between Currie and Jett until Currie's departure from the band. The film grossed about $4.7 million worldwide and received generally favorable reviews from critics.

Plot

Cherie Currie is a teenager in Los Angeles, California who desperately wants to be a rock star. She idolizes David Bowie and cuts her hair and dons make-up so she will resemble Bowie's character Aladdin Sane. At her high school talent show, she lip syncs to "Lady Grinning Soul" and, despite some hecklers in the audience, wins.

Joan Jett is a teenager who also dreams of rock stardom. At a club one night, she meets record producer Kim Fowley and talks about starting an all-girl rock band. Kim is interested. He introduces Joan to Sandy West, a drummer. Joan and Sandy become friends and start jamming when Kim suggests that they recruit a hot blonde in the vein of Brigitte Bardot.

Kim and Joan comb Los Angeles' clubs to look for hot blondes and discover Cherie. They invite her to audition at a trailer park in the San Fernando Valley and to prepare a Suzi Quatro song to perform at her audition. Cherie learns Peggy Lee's "Fever" instead and goes to audition, but the band is disappointed at her choice of song. Kim and Joan then write "Cherry Bomb" on the spot for Cherie to audition with. Cherie sings it and becomes part of the band, named the Runaways, joined by Lita Ford on lead guitar and Robin on bass. Joan and Cherie share a passionate kiss (but what follows between them is implied).

The Runaways are soon signed to Mercury Records and release an album. Due to the album's success, they travel to Japan to play a concert. After their performance, Lita throws magazines at Cherie because they have pictures of Cherie only. Cherie is shocked because she thought the articles were to cover the whole band. As Lita, Cherie and Joan argue, over enthusiastic fans break through the window and chase the girls out of the building. Cherie's drug use worsens, until she overdoses in the hotel elevator and is sent to the hospital. Upon arriving back in the United States, Cherie begins to abuse her alcoholic father's painkiller medication.

At the studio recording their next album, Cherie has a mental breakdown and refuses to play. Lita insults her, and though Joan defends her, Cherie quits the band. Joan is outraged, and the Runaways are finished. Cherie returns home while Joan starts her own band, Joan Jett and the Blackhearts. Cherie collapses again in a phone booth in a supermarket parking lot. At the hospital, her twin sister Marie Currievisits her and tells her to straighten herself up.

A few years later, Cherie is working in a bakery and hears Joan's cover of "I Love Rock 'n' Roll" on the radio and calls the station, where Joan is visiting for interviews. After an awkward conversation between Joan, Cherie, and radio host Rodney Bingenheimer, Cherie says her goodbyes and continues working, smiling when Joan's next song, "Crimson and Clover", comes on the radio.

Cast

Dakota Fanning as Cherie Currie

Kristen Stewart as Joan Jett

Stella Maeve as Sandy West

Scout Taylor-Compton as Lita Ford

Michael Shannon as Kim Fowley

Johnny Lewis as Scottie

Alia Shawkat as Robin: original bassist Jackie Fox chose not to release her rights[2]

Riley Keough as Marie Currie

Hannah Marks as Tammy, a groupie

Keir O'Donnell as Rodney Bingenheimer

Tatum O'Neal as Marie Harmon, a singer and Cherie's mother

Brett Cullen as Mr. Currie, Cherie's father

Brendan Sexton III as Derek

Robert Romanus as the guitar teacher

Nick Eversman as Ricky

#drama film