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shintorikhazumi · 7 years

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Heart Trouble (100 follower fic pt 1)

So... TWO SHOT

A/N: So… first things first,

THANK YOU VERY MUCH FOR 100 FOLLOWERS!!! (111 if you wanna nitpick)

I was expecting it to happen over the weekend, but so soon?

You guys are the best… for sharing and liking my writing that is like… crap and stuff. T^T I have much to work on.

And I have 0 confidence so… pssshhh!

But, Thanks for your support… now… details, details you that might make you not like this…

Wingman/Cousin Andrew? That really is his only purpose… I swear. He shows up in like… 1 or 2 scenes tops… the other shortly. I promise if you don’t like him… but he is relevant for conversation purposes.

The rest is a secret!

This was so rushed(plot-wise) it is horrible!

Enjoy?

~Shintori Khazumi

Heart Trouble:

The heart is a muscular organ in humans and other animals, which pumps blood through the blood vessels of the circulatory system. Blood provides the body with oxygen and nutrients, as well as assists in the removal of metabolic wastes. In humans, the heart is located between the lungs, in the middle compartment of the chest.

As one of the vital organs, the heart was long identified as the center of the entire body, the seat of life, or emotion, or reason, will, intellect, purpose or the mind. The heart is an emblematic symbol in many religions, signifying "truth, conscience or moral courage in many religions – the temple or throne of God in Islamic and Judeo-Christian thought; the divine centre, or atman, and the third eye of transcendent wisdom in Hinduism; the diamond of purity and essence of the Buddha; the Taoist centre of understanding.

Humans have known about the heart since ancient times, although its precise function and anatomy were not clearly understood. From the primarily religious views of earlier societies towards the heart, ancient Greeks are considered to have been the primary seat of scientific understanding of the heart in the ancient world.

Aristotle, Plato, Hippocrates , Erasistratos.

The names of men so great, men who took part in discovering the workings of this instrument in the first centuries, paving the way for modern research and unearthing of treasured facts and wisdom that assisted in unraveling this marvelously complicated organ.

A vital part of life in a small form the size of your fist.

Something, that with its conditions and performance, could mean the difference between life and death.

“And we are yet to completely understand its essence, in the physical, emotional and mental aspect, dare I say spiritual?”

Diana shut her diary/logbook dedicated to her thoughts on heart study.

Reviewing her major points before a big operation did wonders to calm the shaking nerves in her very core as she was about to handle a life with care, her actions determining the fate of the life she held in her hands- quite literally.

Now, she remained in wait in the doctor’s lounge, hands clasped tightly together as she rocked herself on the balls of her feet whilst seated, trying to take away the usual jitters.

Despite being seen as one of the most stoic, calm and collected prodigious doctors, it did not change the fact that even she would feel the pressure of saving lives.

“Doctor Cavendish.” The surgeon specializing in cardiology, turned to her assisting nurses, clipboard of her next patient in hand. “Your charge is here.”

The woman in her late forties smiled at Diana through the photograph.

“Yes, please do bring Miss Benison in once she’s ready.” The doctor instructed, also preparing to change into her operating wear and clean herself for another day of fighting together with her patients to maintain life. “We’ll get her through this.”

~0~0~0~0~0~0~0~0~0~

One successful surgery later, and the young Doctor Cavendish could be found in one of the hospital’s spacious medical wards, a three-hour operation after countless restless nights taking its toll on the prodigious medical worker, eyelids steadily growing in weight as she lay, sprawled, yet in a graceful manner, if possible, on one of the beds.

She considered herself lucky. She was given the mind and abilities, most especially talent for medicine, and had become quite the successful doctor, gaining one too many awards, nearly spotless record.

Her only flaw in being a medical personnel, was that she was almost apathetic, if not, only slightly empathetic towards her patients.

Of course, caring too much and getting attached to patients wasn’t all too highly thought of, but still, to work in such facilities, you needed to care, even just a bit. Diana passed the bare minimum requirement of love.

Yet, even though she knew and tried to change, Diana had always felt that she lacked care.

Or, more accurately, she was afraid to care for her patients.

Her first patient, the reason she had took up Cardiology in the first place and decided to become one of the most amazing heart surgeons, the one she cared, loved the most…

She had let her very first patient…

She had let her own blood, her own mother…

Die.

“-ish. Doctor Cavendish!” A young nurse shouted, shaking the blonde out of her stupor, as she sat up immediately. Hazy sapphires struggled to meet the gaze of the other woman standing above her, features formed in worry. “Are you alright, Doctor?” A blackette questioned, hand reached out, just in case.

“Yes… Yes, I’m quite alright.” The heart surgeon replied, moving out of the other room occupant’s reach. “It might just be the stress.” She waved the woman off, before focusing all around the room, eyes eventually landing back on the nurse’s form, spotting a clipboard in her hands. “New patient?”

The girl blinked, before realizing what it meant.

“Oh, Oh Yes! Yes, I was sent to show you your new patient on the waiting list. She still has about… a month or two before she needs operating, and all the others before her have been assigned different doctors so she has been pushed up the list. Miss Benison is already on the road to recovery so it should be fine adding someone to your list. At least, that’s what the chief told me to tell you.”

Diana sighed, holding out a hand to receive the clipboard, flipping it open and skimming over the details of her newest charge. Well, it was fine accepting it if the operation was fairly far off. At least she wouldn’t exactly have hectic schedules unless this person had very frequent attacks, which did not seem to be the case in her records.

Her interview stated that she also took very good care of her body, doing the recommended exercises for people with her condition to strengthen their hearts, as well as have proper diet and remember to take their medicine properly.

The only thing Diana didn’t quite favor was, due to how long they’d be tied together, she’d have a commitment on her hands. She rarely had cases like this as she was always assigned the urgent cases the needed immediate attention, after all she was the best chance at saving them. So having someone so far off from operation day meant that she’d have no excuse to not get to know her patient.

“Thank you. This is fine.” She answered like she was supposed to, not exactly having a choice. It was work. It was being professional.

So what, was getting to know someone really going to be that big a deal for her? Diana scoffed at herself. She could handle it. And it was nice, having an easier charge, semi-lenient days, not counting her on-call and regular duties.

She could handle this much.

She knew she could.

She thought she could.

Until she spotted the disease.

“Wait… this person-“

The nurse nodded. “Well, yes. She has… Danon disease, which is a fairly rare heart problem, though I know you can handle this much, Doctor. Just that…”

The woman trailed off, and Diana could understand why. Even she felt a bit skeptical about this. After all, with this kind of problem, that girl really should have her operation pushed up.

Danon Disease was a disease rare enough in males, yet even rarer in females. It was a disease that was characterized by cardiomyopathy, the weakening of the muscles, specifically those that helped in pumping. It meant that the heart muscles got weaker and the organ would pump softer, lesser, until it did no more.

Diana narrowed her eyes, searching for the patient’s age.

The life expectancy for patients with Danon Disease was very low. Males at nineteen, females at thirty-four. Her newest patient was at the age of twenty-three, just three years shy of her own age, but anything could happen as this was a very randomly moving disease and she could lose her heart beat at any given time.

Heart troubles like this were supposed to be treated as soon as possible, more favorably through transplant.

Danon Disease was triggered by the x chromosome found in females. In females, who have two X chromosomes, a mutation in one of the two copies of the gene in each cell is sufficient to cause the disorder. Males have only one X chromosome, and a mutation in the only copy of the gene in each cell causes the disorder. In most cases, males experience more severe symptoms of the disorder than females. A characteristic of X-linked inheritance is that fathers cannot pass X-linked traits to their sons, and can only be received from mothers.

“Why isn’t she pushed further up the list? Shouldn’t she be one of those who need a transplant the most?” Diana looked to the nurse, now feeling the usual amount of concern she held for the patients. The usual.

“About that…” The nurse was now nervous from how intense Diana’s gaze was, and the blonde seemed to have noticed as she lightened up and repeated the question, albeit, in a nicer way. This made it easier for the woman to respond, though it was very cautious. “She has yet to find a donor.”

“Oh.” Diana closed the record. “I see. Has the search begun, just no matches?” She inquired, considering the reasons.

“Actually… there already is a match. The most compatible match.”

“Is that so? Then what’s the problem?” Diana could not understand why the girl with the sickness still refused her own life.

“The donor is living… and he’s her father… And it just so happens that he is the only match.”

Diana suddenly felt her heart plunge deep into her stomach, feeling unwell again. So that was it. She could understand the girl to some level… and strangely enough, found that she wanted to learn more of her.

“Alright then,” She tucked the folder under her arm as she got up from the bed, stretching best she could. “Let me meet Miss Atsuko Kagari.”

~0~0~0~0~0~0~0~0~0~

“Akko! Stop it! Just stop and sit. Can you do that for even five seconds? That is practically the minimum requirement!” A brunette male struggled to catch a young adult woman who was currently prancing around the room.

“But Andrew~” The girl whined to her best friend and cousin. “They said I’m finally going to meet my doctor! Won’t that be great?” She finally consented to her cousin’s wishes as she plopped down on her hospital bed, Andrew shrieking as the IV had a back flow.

“Akko!”

“Relax. Psh.” The girl waved him off, flushing the red back down into her system, something the nurse had taught her to do. “I’ll be fine. I’m always like this.”

“And you being like this is what brought you in here!”

“And I’m saying, that I’ll be getting out soon! Won’t that be great? I can finally be…” Suddenly Andrew felt the shift in the mood and was gripped with an immediate anxiousness.

“Don’t say it.” He warned, hearing this line so many times, hating it more and more each and every time. Akko needed to learn to like herself more, and despite saying she did, he always found her either staring herself in the mirror, looking at her own chest, hands pressed to it, or playing with the stethoscope, listening to her own heart when the doctor wasn’t looking in every single check-up she’d ever been in.

He even found out that his own father had bought Akko her own personal stethoscope for the purpose of her listening. She always said it was to learn how to get used to her own heart… so she’d know when it was slowing down.

“Andrew…” She spoke quietly, her face donning a sad smile. “I can finally be-“

It was both unnecessary and necessary worry.

And either worry, he did not need for Akko.

“Normal.”

Silence presumed between them, Andrew finding it hard to respond as the atmosphere suddenly dulled. Akko looked outside her window as she knew that the boy was more likely hurt for her, because of those words, more than he was worried.

“…”

Taking in a deep breath, Andrew mustered enough calm to speak his next words, trying not to heighten Akko’s sadness even more by being negative in his reaction.

“You are normal, Akko.” He reassured, taking a seat on the bedside chair, staring at his cousin’s forlorn figure. “You always have been normal.”

Akko sighed, shoulders slumping, before she lay against her pillows, a hand covering her eyes, shielding them from the brightness coming from the open curtains.

“My body sure doesn’t think so.”

“Akko-“ Whatever the rich boy had to say, had been cut off by soft raps on the room door.

“Come in~” Akko immediately tossed away her sad self, bearing a mask of joy, one that only few could decipher, Andrew lucky enough to know, and he clicked his tongue in annoyance.

“Miss Kagari?” Her usual nurse popped out from the door. “The doctor will be here to see you soon.”

“Thanks, Nurse Lotte!” She grinned at the bespectacled woman, who returned the smile, ready to go with her usual duties.

“You’re very welcome, Miss Kagari-“

“A-K-K-O. Call me Akko, Nurse Lotte.” Akko looked at her cheekily after interrupting her, and the nurse could only find it in herself to giggle at the positive attitude of her patient.

“Alright then, Akko, but only if you call me Lotte as well.” She went closer to the bed, checking on the vitals and IV, as she and Akko indulged in idle chatter while doing the usual routine.

“So Lotte… I was wondering.” Akko tried to get her nurse’s attention, as the girl was currently scribbling something on her clipboard.

“Yes Akko?”

“What’s the- my doctor like?” She asked, very curious as to who this great person who would free her from this binding chains called sickness, was.

“Well, in a sense, she is what most people would call a genius…” Lotte seemed to think, or maybe she was preoccupied with her rounds that she didn’t notice Akko’s expectant look.

“And?” She pushed, poking Lotte in the arm who started laughing as the gesture tickled. “Come on, there must be more to it than that!”

“W-well.. AHaha… stop, stop tickling!” Lotte gave her a stern glare, before it softened into a small smile. “You could say she is very, and I mean very, beautiful.”

“Oh? That just makes me more excited to meet her then, now that I know that it’s a woman.” Akko responded, now giddy. Andrew just rolled his eyes playfully. Akko swinging that way was no surprise after all.

“I’m sure you are.” Lotte grinned, now done with her check-up. “All right, she should be here right about-

“Miss Kagari?” Another voice came from the door. “Nurse Hannah here-“ A brunette in a ponytail peeked out.

“Nurse Barbara-“ Another continued, this time with pitch black hair, worn down.

“We’re here to check up on you, as well as assist Doctor Cavendish.” They both said in unison, parting by the door to leave space for those who needed to pass through.

“-Now.” Lotte finished with a smile. “I’ll leave you to it.” She told the girl, gathering her stuff to leave.

“Bye~”

Akko sat up straight, expectantly, now very intrigued on who this doctor could be.

Her jaw nearly dropped as a woman, not much older than her by the looks of it, came in the room, blonde hair pulled into a low ponytail with loose strands of hair framing her face, and Akko decided no one else could have looked as amazing in a scrub suit and lab coat.

“Miss Kagari, I assume? Hello. My name is Doctor Diana Cavendish. I specialize in cardiology and heart surgery, and I am the doctor assigned to you.” The stunning woman introduced herself to a dazed Akko who resumed her blatant staring at the Medical goddess before her, feeling healed already.

“Hey, are you okay?” Nurse Hannah asked, suddenly worried at the lack of response while Barbara went to check on the vitals.

Akko, blinking at the sound of different voices, immediately blurted out all her thoughts.

“Wow you’re really pretty! Like seriously!” She gushed, doing multiple once-overs, scanning the Cavendish from head to toe. “Though, you look… serious. A lot more than I’d expect from a doctor. Seen a lot of deaths, I suppose?”

Andrew almost choked on his saliva, trying not to laugh at that. He had heard of Diana Cavendish, and she was one of the brightest minds in the medical world. She had saved so many lives directly, and through all her many discoveries. Her fail ratio in percentage was very low… so to see his cousin say something like that so someone so medically-inclined, he could only recall fondly all the times she had lowered prideful beings, him and his father being prime examples.

“H-how rude!” Hanna screeched, shocked that someone would assume something so low of the good doctor. “Doctor Cavendish is one of the most prodigious doctors! A true genius, young and talented!” Barbara, though silent, nodded furiously in agreement. “So few people- I could count the number on my fingers, have actually gone under when with her, and that was already during the extreme cases!”

“I can count to a hundred on my fingers. Just do it over and over.” Akko teased, suddenly enjoying this flustered nurse.

Diana felt a tick growing on her head. Such a shameless patient. What was she even thinking? Provoking a nurse like this? What if they got into a little spat? That surely could possibly agitate her condition.”

“That’s not what I mean!”

“Heh…”

“Why-“

“It’s quite alright.” Diana cut the banter off, sending a look that spoke ‘back off and let me handle this.’ That made Hannah do so, and gave Akko a stern, cold stare, one full of warning.

“Doctor.” Akko nodded in greeting. “My name is-“

“I am well aware of that.” Diana told her, professional mode turned on. “I am also aware of your… condition.” Akko’s playful mood was swiftly banished, and she too adapted an air of seriousness. “I assume you do as well.”

The brunette allowed red and blue to clash, trying to decipher Diana as the blonde was doing the same. Cocky playfulness, then a sudden change to eerie graveness. What was this patient, who was this patient?

“I do know.” She said shortly after, refusing to break the connection. “I’ve known for quite some time- scratch that, I’ve known all my life.”

Diana raised a brow, unimpressed. “Well then, Miss Kagari,”

“Please call me Akko-“

“Miss Kagari.” Said girl was now listening better, after being shot down. “If you do know, then… you know how risky you are being, right? Picking fights with your condition-“

“I’m fine.” Akko insisted, and Diana frowned, obviously disagreeing.

“You most certainly aren’t. Now let me continue.” She threw a glare in, just to make sure Akko’s mouth stayed shut. “You know you have a problem. You know the effects. You know you cannot overexcite your own heart. You have cardiomyopathy, a symptom of a much larger disease, Danon Disease.” Diana explained, and Akko nodded, behaving herself for once.

“As you know, there are several surgical treatments to it.” Akko nodded, not wanting to interrupt anymore as she listened to the more favorable ways to get well rather than the one she absolutely needed to avoid. “Implantable Loop Recorder… for recording arrhythmias, ICD placement for slightly heavier circumstances and…” Diana sneaked a glance at the other’s expression as she read the diagnoses off the board. “Transplant.”

Akko stiffened, and Diana noticed the girl looked almost angry with her for the suggestion. “May I have either of the first two?” She nearly pleaded, voice far from the tone the brunette used when they first came in.

“I…” Diana found it hard to respond. Mostly, due to knowing the reason on why the girl was against it. “I’m sorry to tell you that after your results from a lab test came out, it was decided that transplant would be the best way to save you.” Dian informed, wondering why she could not keep her professional front as much as usual.

“Then I decline.” Akko was convicted. She was not going to back down from this decision, even if this pretty lady tried to convince her what many people tried to show her in the past. “I know the stakes. If that’s how it’s gonna be, I refuse to be saved.” She said this stubbornly, and Diana felt her well-controlled emotions on a rise.

“Now Listen here, we are doing our best to help you, but we also need you to help yourself. I know the decision is hard, but-“

“Then if you know it’s hard, don’t even recommend stuff like that.” Akko’s voice was raised, eyes slanted and narrowed as her finger pointed to the door. “I will not let my father give everything away for me. I’d rather die, than see him replace me in a casket for me!”

“Miss Kagari-“ Diana’s reprimand was right on her tongue, ready to talk some sense into the girl. But Akko’s heart was already closed, anger now churning in her system.

“Leave!”

The blonde doctor’s eyes widened, noticing the heart monitor on the side picking up in speed. Either she got out so that the girl would calm herself, or force sedatives, a more negative way that could lead to side effects.

She chose the better way.

“We were just leaving.” She still had some pride intact and she would keep it that way till the end. “I hope our next check-up will be on better terms.”

Akko no longer responded as the trio left her room, before Andrew smacked the back of her head, scolding her for her behavior towards the doctor. She did not seem to care though, and lay down, pulling the blankets over her, not wanting to talk about this any longer.

Andrew, realizing this, gave up, and decided to reflect on why Akko still refused.

It was reasonable, yet he knew both Akko and her father’s decisions were made out of love.

Now the only thing that would decide how Akko’s stay would go down was whether her resolve, or her father’s was stronger.

And that was the most worrying.

~0~0~0~0~0~0~0~0~0~

Diana felt herself slump against the wall of the ward after she had been left alone by her assistants. Her breathing was labored and she was tired, and scared, not feeling quite like herself. She did not know why such an effect, such worry gripped her, anxiousness filled her, but she knew the trigger. Those words!

“I’d rather die…”

“That is what she said.” Diana pressed a hand to her spinning forehead, willing the nausea to leave her be.

There was a sense of familiarity there… and Diana knew she had been in the same boat before, only on the opposite side.

She was the one who was supposed to give the transplant, and she was the one to whom those words were said for.

“I’d rather die than let my own daughter do it for me.” Her mother’s words rewound in her mind, countless times in the night, and now it was back to haunt her, even in the day because of some stupid girl. “She has more of a future, a life to live than I. She will most certainly not be my donor.”

“I suppose I can understand that fool a bit more now.” Diana murmured before returning to her bed to catch some sleep.

~0~0~0~0~0~0~0~0~0~

The following visit to Akko’s had served a surprise to Diana as the moment she entered the room, the girl had prostrated herself, though in a seated position on her bed, and uttered an unending string of apologies to the blonde.

It was a totally different experience, but it showed Diana just how positive a patient Akko could be and totally changed her opinion of her.

“I sincerely apologize for my outrageous behavior, Doctor Cavendish!”

After reassuring the girl that it was alright, and Diana sharing similar experiences before, just so that she could convince her patient to feel less guilty, Akko shared her story of her ‘realization of sins’.

Turns out, her cousin had tattled to her father and she got the big scolding she deserved.

The way the girl spoke it in such an animated manner almost made Diana laugh, but she restrained it, the result being her caught up in her own giggles as Akko stared dumbfounded at the sight, putting the sound into memory as if it were a sacred song.

She dared not comment on it, lest Diana stopped doing it. And she had not realized until later when she left the room after the rounds, in a much better mood than before, and actually looking forward to the next visit.

~0~0~0~0~0~0~0~0~0~

The third visit… as they say, third time’s the charm. It was the charm to allow Akko to talk more about herself and open up the slightest bit, which wasn’t all that hard seeing she was a friendly girl.

Diana started off with something light.

The girl’s hobbies, likes interest, how she managed her life up till now.

And this went on over the entirety of the week.

Diana would do her rounds every day, she would then check on her main patient, they’d do the routine, and all the while, they’d enter into easy chatter, steadily baring themselves more and more, relationship- trust, getting stronger between the patient and doctor.

They’d talk every day, and not once did they run out of topics for each little visit, delving deeper into knowing one another.

Diana began seeing that there was more to Akko than first, excitable, eccentric impressions, and that was that she had her quiet moments. From time to time, she would find the girl staring out the window in complete silence for minutes- hours maybe, Diana did not know, just before she’d enter to start the usual.

In turn, Akko found that Diana wasn’t just stoic and cold and professional, she was trying (though failing), to connect, and that was probably one of the main reasons she found it alright to exchange stories with Diana about themselves. Consider it her act of helping and payback.

Akko was more than willing to share, even returning some questions to Diana such as how she was at school, her favorite food, and even how she came to be a doctor, a great one at that, and on their tenth day, Akko realized the question that made her doctor answer more solemnly, the reason for her hardship in reaching out.

“My mother died and I could do nothing to save her… Even when I already was a doctor.” Diana ran a hand through her hair. “That’s why I don’t like getting too close to patients.” She was already hinting that Akko might have noticed, fully knowing the brunette was far more perceptive than she came off as.

Akko regretted asking that one. She felt so angry at herself not knowing that before. Maybe if shehad, their first meeting might have been smoother. She almost pinched herself. Almost since Diana stopped her hand before it could do harm to her already pink cheeks.

“It’s alright. I have more or less… accepted it already and… it brought me where I am today, I guess.” It was strange, to share such things with a patient, her own story. She never had to with her unspoken rule of being apathetic.

But now… Diana felt that their situations were reversely similar.

She could be empathetic.

“I… because of that, I’ll let you as me any heavy question as well.” Akko offered as compensation, genuinely feeling bad about what she had caused Diana, opening up old wounds, and all that.

“but-“

“Hey, I say I can handle it, you agree. That’s your job.” Akko gave a smile, though not quite reaching her eyes.

Diana returned the helpless grin, sighing. “No it is not…” But then again, there was a question that had been nagging at her. “Alright… Since when did you… know you had this disease and how did you react to it?” Diana thought it would be lighter than the one she answered, but she stood corrected.

Akko pressed her hands together, sweat seeming to pour out of her pores as she breathed, actually hesitant for once, to share.

And the doctor saw the same melancholy she often found in herself.

“I apologize, You don’t need to answer if you find it difficult.” Akko shook her head, heart prepared for the question anyway.

“My mom…” She began, and Diana felt wretched, the words very bitter-sounding in her ears. That particular pair… ‘My’ and ‘mom’. But the surgeon steeled herself and listened on, lending a listening ear and being attentive. “ She had the same disease…” Akko shrugged, but her lips quivered, and Diana decided to be the one to hear these problems and help Akko through it, whatever the tale might be.

“Go on.” Diana went closer, rubbing soothing circles on Akko’s back, now opting to hear everything so she could help. It was an awakening of her consciousness to patients, and she wanted to start with Akko, feeling the need to learn more, grow closer, despite still needing the reason as to why she felt that way.

Empathy, relatable situations. This was her reason to herself, though every day she knew Akko more, it was getting harder to believe that that was just it.

Akko was grateful for the support, taking in a large breath, now prepared to share what she had avoided for years. “When she gave birth to me-“ Maybe it was still hard, however, as she choked, tears forming at the corners of her eyes. “- you know the rest.”

Diana hugged the girl in understanding, knowing what she meant, and feeling very sad for the one in her arms, locked tightly in her embrace, crying silently while grasping at the sleeves of her coat.

“I’m sorry for your loss.”

And that was all Diana could think in terms of what to say. She wanted to take the words back immediately though as they only made Akko cry harder, causing her to hold the other closer, tighter.

“I’m sorry.”

~0~0~0~0~0~0~0~0~0~

Half-way into their second week, and Diana had already felt that her wall that she had been building up since her mother’s death was slowly, but surely being torn down by one mischievous, yet clever patient.

It was unexpected, but certainly not unwelcome, as Diana found herself enjoying her usually mundane everyday tasks. Even her mood and attitude towards work and her patients, had slowly, but surely improved.

She had gained that ‘empathy’ that she’d so desired.

And now, another day, another talk, and she was looking forward to seeing Akko one more time, eager to learn more, feel more, and ultimately, help the other girl more.

Diana knocked three times swiftly on the door, followed by 2 slower raps of her knuckles, and another set of three. A code that would let Akko know it was the doctor, before she could enter with her own key.

“Heya, Doctor Cavendish!” The girl greeted cheerfully, immediately switching from her somber look just seconds ago, to a cheery, excited one. “Guess it’s time for that again, huh?” She wiggled her brows, smiling in a teasing way.

Diana rolled her eyes, shaking her head as she chuckled at her patient’s antics. “Please refrain from making my visits sound so scandalous, Miss Kagari.”

The brunette groaned, though she was wearing an ear splitting grin as she pretended to melt on the bed. “Please call me ‘Akko’, Doctor Cavendish… or else I can’t call you by your name! I feel so stiff and icky when you call me ‘Miss Kagari.’” The girl spoke in a comical imitation of the physician’s voice, causing her to laugh.

“Well, what’s stopping you? From calling me by my given name, I mean.” Diana awaited the reply, looking at the heart patient fondly. “It’s never stopped you before, from what I have heard from most of the workers who’ve had the… pleasure… of meeting you.” The doctor dared a teasing phrase that elicited a pout from Akko.

“Now, what could you possibly mean by that?” She hummed, eyes narrowing, daring Diana some more.

“I wonder…” The doctor replied, proceeding with the check-up. “Now, tell me, come on.” She urged an answer from the girl as she stared at the heart monitor beside the bed, counting the beats and observing, writing said observations down in her records.

“What? I really have to answer that question?” Akko felt shy, watching Diana as she checked up on all the vitals, as she was embarrassed as to the reason.

“Yes, Miss Kagari. Do share.” Diana grinned, done with the less physical checks and now held a stethoscope up, wearing the buds. “But later, I need to check your heart beat. Let me listen. You know the drill.”

Akko nodded turning around so that Diana could listen to her heart from the back, just as how nurse Lotte did, under her hospital gown.

She was surprised when Diana stopped her and told her to just sit still as she drew closer to Akko, earbuds in place, as she listened from the front.

The front.

And it shouldn’t have been a problem. Diana was not one to do unnecessary things and touch places she shouldn’t. She was very professional about this check-up.

But to Akko, it was just a tiny bit too much.

During their first meeting, when she said Diana was beautiful, she wasn’t lying. She found the other woman extremely captivating, from her tall nose, rosy cheeks, to those gorgeously plump lips, to her long lashes, and to those eyes that could just suck her in.

And her breath and heartbeat may have just picked up a bit, something that did not go past the doctor’s surveillance.

“Relax.” She spoke the one word that made Akko do so, snapping out of that trance. “Breath in deeply, then out.”

Doing as she was told, Akko felt her heart slow down to a normal pace, allowing Diana a better study of Akko’s heart pace.

A sigh of relief came from the patient as the blonde doctor finally stepped back, allowing her some space as she had a slight frown on her face.

“Well, Miss Kagari.” She obviously was not pleased with whatever discovery she had made. “I see your heart beat is not normal. Quite faster than the norm, which is actually one of the symptoms of the disease you have.” She stated, a bit worriedly.

“I see.” Akko now felt concerned over her own self, because she’d never known such things. To her, this was the normal pacing of hearts. The only one she’d ever known, not willing to compare herself to others out of fear and insecurity.

“Do not fret.” Diana sat by her bed, holding Akko’s hand, prompting her to look into azure eyes. “I am here because I can help. So trust me.” Her voice, her gaze, the warmth she emitted, they were all so compelling, that Akko was left speechless and could only nod.

They sat like that a few minutes, they did not know how long, but somehow it felt like eternity and nothing at the same time-

And immediately the lights went off, and no beeping came from the machine as yelps of surprise or clatters from outside could be heard, registering in Diana’s mind that there must have been a change of power due to a strong black-out maybe and the generators were beginning to start things up again.

Diana was not one to be afraid of the dark and such.

To her, no such problems existed.

But now, fear gripped at her heart, because once the monitor by the bedside started up, coupled with sudden labored breathing that was most certainly not hers, she was sure that those moans of pain were coming from Akko… and that she was having palpitations, possibly from the surprise of the sudden happening.

“D…doctor. It-! Hah… hu-hurts!”

Diana’s eyes went wide, her mind immediately scanning everything and tried to get her body to respond accordingly to the situation, first calling up nurse assistance before checking through the bedside drawers for Akko’s prescription medicine for cases like these.

As the responding nurses came in, Diana ordered them around, one handing her a glass of water as she tried to get Akko to drink her medications as best she could.

“Careful now, relax and try to drink, Miss Kagari.” She rubbed soothing circles on the girl’s back, trying to do gestures that could possibly calm the other down, but to no fruition.

The other nurses were now preparing a stronger medicine for Akko, and one that might help her fall asleep, as the only thing Diana could do now, was pray. For her patient, for this girl…

For Akko.

“Drink, Akko. Relax. You’ll be fine, Akko.” She spoke the name over and over again, and it seemed to work as the girl was able to take the pills, and shortly after, fell into a deep sleep, the only thing that said it was really sleep and not… another kind of sleep was the lone beep of the monitor in the cold white room of the hospital.

~0~0~0~0~0~0~0~0~0~

Diana Cavendish had been so worried. Worried like never before in the history of her work in this institution, and her heart had been beating so painfully against her chest, that it probably tired her out.

The nurses left the pair as soon as the patient’s condition was deemed stable, but she would be under constant monitoring because her first palpitation here in this facility had been fairly strong, and quite easily triggered.

The blonde doctor yawned before groggily opening her eyes, realizing it was already sunset from how the pristinely white room was now dyed with tints of orange and red. Sitting up from her position, head on the bed covers, realizing she had fallen asleep, her head snapped up to check on Akko who she found was staring blankly out the window as she always did before Diana came to do her rounds.

“I think I understand how dying people feel.”

The sudden words of the girl jolted the last bit of Diana’s sleepiness out of her system, as concern flooded her being, now trying to lean closer to the solemn woman on the bed who refused to look at her.

“What do you mean?” Diana knew that Akko knew she was awake, and decided to ask her questions. “Are you in pain again? Do you need anything?” She offered her assistance, to which Akko waved her off, not even sparing her a glance.

They were quiet, but the statement still nagged at Diana.

“Akko, what did you mean? What are you implying when you say you understand how dying people feel? You’re alive Akko, alive and well.”

Akko shook her head, saying she didn’t mean it like that before explaining, and Diana longed for the brunette to look at her while she spoke the next words, or else she wouldn’t be able to fathom what it was that troubled the other.

“You may have not known exactly ‘when’ but you just know…” Akko began, voice softening, but not wavering. “You just ‘feel’ that it may be your last. And that’s it. You end up accepting it all.”

Diana shook her head, feeling like crying for reasons unknown. Not crying for herself, but crying for the emotionless shell that sat before her.

An Atsuko Kagari she did not know.

“I did not die. So I have nothing to accept.” Akko spoke for the last time that day, eyes shifting to Diana’s watery ones, as they were lifeless as she implied.

Diana nearly choked at the last words as she gripped the garments of her patient who might have wanted to give up.

“So I have a question… Would you accept it?”

And just those words told Diana everything she did not want to know.

~0~0~0~0~0~0~0~0~0~

Diana stayed by Akko’s side as the late afternoon rays turned to darkness, one hand still clutching the robes of the girl for fear she might disappear, while the other flipped through the pages as Diana reviewed Akko’s records she had on hand.

She now began to remember some things. Such as, despite the fact Akko was usually so peppy and energetic, the reason she was here in the first place, and why she had been pushed up the waiting list, was that her palpitations were frequenting her more often, and growing stronger as her heart grew weaker in contrast, taking her closer to the state everyone hoped to avoid.

It did not help that she was aware of it too, and did not want to take the only decision to get better.

Nurse Lotte dropped by soon with Akko’s dinner, as did Andrew to take watch of Akko for the night, as he said their fathers would be visiting the following day, to which Akko simply nodded.

Diana took that as her cue to exit, throwing some words out before leaving.

“Good night.” She began, trying to seek out Akko’s eyes from where she stood by the door. She was not able to see the reaction, and she sighed, relenting for tonight. “See you in the morning.”

“Heavenly morning?” The words stopped her in her tracks, as she turned to look in shock.

Silence took over the room, before sense came back to Diana.

“Just… see you in the morning.”

~0~0~0~0~0~0~0~0~0~

A Long meeting the following day announced that Akko’s heart transplant would be moved sooner, rather than the two month wait, and that in the following two weeks, at latest, Akko would have a brand new heart. Whether or not she would accept.

That point was made very clear by her father, which Diana now identified as Mr. Ken, a kind man, with a big heart, enough to fill in for Akko’s broken one.

It pained her to see that this was the last choice. And she could see why Akko was vehemently refusing. Her father was a wonderful man, and Diana could tell in those few short moments they talked.

Carrying the heavy news to Akko’s room, she was afraid of what to expect as the door opened. She could not show weakness, however, as Mr. Kagari was accompanying her to the room.

“I haven’t seen Akko in a while. I know that if I saw her, she’d talk me out of the donation and… and I’d… I’d just argue with her and worsen her state.” He spoke weakly, very sadly, and Diana felt her heart break.

“I hope we come to the best decision, then.” She patted the older man’s back in reassurance as she did her special knock before entering the room.

What greeted her was a cheery Akko, much like how it had been the first time they had a negative confrontation, before the smile disappeared at the sight of the girl’s father.

“No!” She immediately yelled, throwing her pillow at the man.

“Akko!” Andrew, who was still in the room, held her hands before she could toss whatever items, including her meds. “Stop! Just, stop!”

Out of breath and angry, it dawned on her to relax, unless she wanted to convince her father some more on donating his life to her.

“I will not accept.” She crossed her arms, huffing in indignation. “You’re free to visit me, dad. But I won’t be needing any transplant, you understand? No one is dying and I’m going to go home with you just fine, both hearts intact!” And her words allowed no more argument, as Mr. Kagari sighed, rubbing his temples.

“That’s not poss-“

Before they could get into another spat, Diana remembered something about the surgical operations. This one wouldn’t be as effective as a new heart, but it would grant Akko’s wish. She didn’t know why she would even suggest such a thing, as it was always engraved into her being to do what was best for the patients regardless of how cruel it may be. But right now, this seemed to be the best for Akko’s circumstances.

“ICD placement.” She cut in, looking to Akko and her father. “What if Akko had ICD placement instead?”

“But that’s-“

“I know it wouldn’t be as effective, or long lasting as a transplant. But it still works, does it not? And it would answer to both your wishes.” Diana tried to suggest, and Akko’s father fumed in anger, against the blonde doctor’s expectations, no relief for middle ground anywhere.

“Are you saying I should just settle for some secondary choice, one that isn’t as good as the one now?” He raise his voice against the doctor. “I am the only donor compatible with my daughter, you know that! What if my heart deteriorates soon as she needs the transplant in the future. What will you do then? Right now, this is the only time for this. I’ve taken care of my heart, and I am ready to give it to her, so don’t help her in convincing me OTHERWISE!!”

“Dad.”

The man froze at his daughter’s tone, realizing what he had done to the woman who was going to help his daughter out. Who was trying to help them both out.

“I’m sorry.” He covered his eyes, beginning to cry. “I need some air.” The door shut behind him with a click, and Andrew decided to follow after him, leaving the doctor and patient alone.

It was awkward.

Diana was left alone with the daughter of the man who just yelled in her face at her horrible suggestion, and the one who had just defended her against the said father.

“I am so-“

“Thanks.” The words shocked Diana. She had angered the girl’s father and caused a rift between them. For what was she expressing gratitude for?

“Whatever are you referring to, I-“

“Diana…” Akko gave her a gentle smile, and Diana felt her heart speed up. She wondered if she was beginning to have heart problems as well. “Thank you for trying for me. For trying to find a solution that would make me happy. That could save both me and my father.” She reached out a hand, beckoning Diana to come closer and to take it. “Thank you.”

Diana walks to the girl, grasps her hand and sits down. “You’re very much welcome. Always.” She said, knowing Akko would take no other answer, and that there was more to it than that.

She still had something to say.

“What is it?” Diana prodded, playing with their joined hands as Akko blinked, caught off guard before she laughed that tinkling laughter that could only belong to her.

Diana admitted this was one of her most favorite sounds in the world.

“You could tell I wanted to say something?” Akko grinned, eyes turning to slits as she drew closer, bumping her forehead against Diana’s.

“Of course, I am your doctor after all.” Diana said quite proudly at guessing correctly. Now she waited.

“Then you should be able to guess, Doctor~” –and now groaned at Akko’s misleading.

“Just tell it to me straight, Miss Kagari.” She spoke in a faux- stern voice, almost pulling away as Akko went even closer, lips almost touching, but not quite, only brushing their noses together, causing Diana’s breath to get caught in her throat.

“Do you really want to know?” She whispered, staring at Diana’s lips, causing her to swallow that lump in her throat.

“Yes, Akko.” She replied, voice not betraying her nerves.

“Really, Reaaallyy?” Diana gave her an eye roll as those nerves disappeared almost immediately at the endearing annoying nature of her charge.

“Yes.” The doctor was now exasperated, nervousness gone, and impatient to hear what answer Akko had in store for her.

The brunette hummed, eyelids falling shut as she rubbed their foreheads together before giggling softly.

“Then… I love you.”

There was a pause hanging in the air as Diana froze, not being able to pull back, shocked, to say the least... and then there was silence…. Reigning in the room…

Akko found it far too uncomfortable and was the one to release the close proximity, sighing in disappointment, and something much heavier than that. She tried to snap the other out of it, very sorry to have destroyed a potentially unbreakable bond because of her own selfishness.

“Diana? I’m sorry, was it wrong of me to sa-“

“You can’t love me.”

Her words cut off, and now Akko blinked, confused.

“What…Why?” She was skeptical, having expected a yes or no firmly, but now, the answer was not ‘No’, but more of, ‘Don’t’.

“Because I don’t care.” The blonde finally replied, and in her heart, she knew it was a Lie. In truth, she was afraid because now, now that a girl named Atsuko Kagari came into her life, she regained something. Care… and now she was afraid that she cared too much. But there was a fact they both had to consider. One Diana realized, and one Akko was about to know.

“I feel you do. You always do.” Akko argued against the opinion the doctor had of herself, willing it to be a lie, if it weren’t already. “With every touch and motion, and work you do for me, you show me how much you care.”

It was true and Diana knew. Akko knew. They both knew.

However…

“But then, you still can’t.”

Akko scratched her head at the stubbornness, really not understanding the reason, now deciding to give up, and tell her reason for the spontaneous confession.

“I just wanted to tell you, you know. It’s not like I expect something back.” She crossed her arms, telling Diana about how it was a love along the way, and even if it only took a short while, she knew it was what it was. And now, her reason-“I just didn’t want to have regrets when I left.”

When she left.

Diana was afraid because Akko was implying that she would leave.

“That’s exactly why.” Her voice murmured, trying to hold onto Akko’s arms and searching for her hands to hold.

“What are you talking about?” Akko was about to receive an answer, and she was going to receive it.

“You can’t tell me you love me and leave me behind.” Diana looked into her eyes, silently admitting to herself that there was a possibility to her returning these feelings.

“Diana…”

“I think… it is totally possible, with how you’ve made me feel lately, for me to develop the same emotion for you… but!” She gazed at Akko intensely, into her very soul. “I don’t want to love you back if you’re already dead. So you can’t tell me that if you’re not going to live for me.” And it weakened back down to a sorry state.

And now, Akko understood.

And after understanding, she laughed. A lot.

“Diana… I’m sorry.”

“Wha-“ The sudden turn of events was throwing Diana off, and now, the contagious laughter was beginning to pull out giggles from her.

“You’re absolutely right. I can’t do that to you, huh?” Akko said, leaning against her bed frame with a wide smile, eyes filled with mirth.

“Akko-“

“Guess I’ll just have to live another day.” She grinned, now having a new mission, a new reason to live.

Diana sighed, discarding all other thoughts.

“Yes, you do.”

The moment was interrupted by the opening of the door, as Akko’s father enters into the room, eyes red, but looking much calmer, kinder, and happier.

“I’m sorry Akko.” He began, drawing closer to the girl and enveloping his daughter in a massive hug, kissing her hair as he mutters more apologies. He told the pair that he finally accepts the decision of having Akko undergo the ICD placement instead after much convincing on Andrew’s part, which Akko would be eternally grateful for.

He also apologized profusely to Diana who now humbly told him it was alright, and that there were far more intense cases than him.

Akko couldn’t be happier.

Having a confession somewhat (?) accepted, her father agreeing to a method that would allow them both to survive, and promised days of more happiness, with Diana hopefully be her side if she played those cards right.

She was looking forward to another day.

Diana was happy- no overjoyed. This time around, she wouldn’t be losing a patient dear to her. She had the skills and experience now to make it work, and now she went off to make the arrangements, a skip in her step, ready to face this battle prepared.

~0~0~0~0~0~0~0~0~0~

The following days flew by in a flash, and Diana and Akko found themselves growing ever closer, and it was enough to instill negative thoughts in Diana of ‘what ifs’ that included Akko and… eternal slumber.

But the brunette had always worked her hardest to throw such thoughts to the curb, and reassured Diana, promised her that she’d fight, that she’d work hard, that she’d stay and be there.

And more courting from Akko’s side came, and despite being a weak and fragile patient, as she put it (to which the good Doctor would often scoff, Diana found herself giving in bit by bit.

And such was the case in their latest conversation, as some of Akko’s friends had sent her papers and cards and she had begun folding random works of art, including a colorful array of paper roses which she handed to Diana during the next check-up.

The girl sputtered embarrassed nonsense, but accepted them in the end, softly hitting Akko’s arm after a rather teasing comment.

“So, So? What if I make it through? For you, especially?” The girl batted her lashes at Diana, trying to pull off a cute look, which was certainly effective in Diana’s books.

She blushed, humming in fake contemplation, already having an answer.

“If you survive this, I might just agree to going out with you.”

She smiled, and Akko smiled back.

“Then I really only have one choice, don’t I?”

~0~0~0~0~0~0~0~0~0~

Everything for the operation had been settled.

Diana was ecstatic after the meeting, practically skipping to Akko’s room to share the good news. And maybe, just maybe, with a bit more convincing, it could be done even earlier. For everyone’s sake.

“Good morning~” She practically sings as she opens the door, almost screeching at the sight of an empty bed, before an out-of-bed Akko pops out from around the corner with a white rose in hand.

“Good morning to you too, sunshine.” She smiled, managing to land a kiss on porcelain cheeks. Diana felt steam rise out of her head, and Akko merely laughed at her state. “And what has gotten you in such a pleasant mood this morning, Doctor Cavendish? Besides me, of course.”

Diana pinches the cheeky little cheek, before caressing it softly, Akko leaning into the touch as the blonde explains everything to her and Akko grows ever enthusiastic towards this operation, fearless, entrusting her life into Diana’s hands completely, fully certain she’d come out alright.

And what’s more-

Diana agrees that after the operation, Akko can confess again then she would accept.

The brunette was so happy she nearly lifted her doctor off the floor if only she wasn’t stopped by said doctor.

“Then I’m so happy I could kiss you?” It was a request for permission, which Diana declined fruitlessly as Akko wasn’t going to take no for an answer, acting upon her feelings… within respectable boundaries as she only planted it on Diana’s forehead and cheeks, but it was enough to render her tomato red.

“I love you.”

“Mm.”

~0~0~0~0~0~0~0~0~0~

After more weeks, two to be exact, of fighting together against Akko’s illness, the date of the operation had already come down to tomorrow.

That night, after a pre-operation celebration, Diana had ended up too tired and slept in Akko’s room, right by her side.

It had been a hectic juggle between her normal duties, then the special assignment to Akko, and the little party, but she somehow managed to live through it all despite her exhaustion, and was rewarded with a good night’s rest as she fell asleep to the feeling of fingers combing through her hair and a lullaby drifting through her mind.

Diana woke up to soft breathing and hand clasping hers, filling her with a warmth in her heart despite that slightly cold touch of their skin. Diana blamed it on the air conditioning.

She barely took note that Akko’s heart felt just a tiny bit slower, softer. Waving it off as the girl’s normal pace while sleeping. Something she never should have even considered, knowing the condition.

But, she couldn’t think that right now.

However, throughout the day, it remained the same, and the doctor would not quite shake off that inkling that something was at odds.

Throughout the day, she subconsciously remained very wary of heart beat, feeling off about something, growing more anxious, despite Akko’s cheery smiles and flirting.

It pained her to do it, but Diana could only manage to plaster on a fake smile, if only to keep Akko happy.

She fell asleep under premonition of negativity that she was beginning to loathe.

The next day, Diana awoke in the same position as yesterday, by Akko’s bed, as the brunette continued to snore away her worries, a light smile on her face as she held hands with Diana.

The doctor felt an endearing smile tug at her lips as she brushed a few stray strands of hair out of her face, then risking a kiss on her forehead, praying she’d stay asleep as Diana snuck off with an idea in her head that could well be a positive start to this day.

It may have been a simple gesture, just going out to the cafeteria to pick up the brunette’s breakfast, but Diana knew small things like this, meant big things for Akko.

As she began nearing the room, happy to have been able to obtain the patient’s favorite meal after weeks of observation, she pauses in her tracks as she hears the one long beep of heart monitor, that has her clutching at her heart, drops the tray of food she was carrying and rushes in the room, dread in her bones as nurses in a frenzy, are all trying to help the now gasping patient, writhing in pain, and shaking..

Diana snapper out of her trance, assisting best she could, so scared, but knew that she had to focus, if she wanted to save the now dangerously fragile Akko.

The sound of the monotonous heart machine kills her so, but the desperate breathing from the source of the beat tells her there is that tiniest bit of hope for revival, but even those bits were trampled, crushed into smithereens as the breathing was dying down.

“She needs CPR!”

In one swift motion, Diana was on it, but she could not resist breaking down and begins crying while giving CPR to her unconscious patient.

She needed to talk some sense into the girl. She wanted to reach her.

“Damn you,” She began, cursing the girl as the nurses stared in shock. “You promised!” She pushed, before giving a breath. “Akko!”

“Doctor Cavendish?!” The usual calm and collected woman’s image flew out the window, as a broken and desperate professional now tried to save a life before them.

“You promised so please…” She begged, voice cracking, inhaling deeply before calling out. “ FIGHT!” She continued her work. “I believe in your believing heart. Now Fight!”

Nothing.

There was nothing.

And after Diana had tried so much, cried so much-

… nothing.

“Ah…kko.”

And there was just…

Nothing.

[To be Continued…]

A/N: Sooooo… if I get 150? Or maybe 120… Second chap will be out. Sorry if this is cruel… but hey, 10 more and it’s 120… ok nevermind. I’ll post part two when I find time.

NOW LET ME SLEEP.

I love you.

~Shintori Khazumi

#lwa #little witch academia #diana cavendish #akko kagari #hospital au #heart trouble #dianakko #fanfic

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