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#and the thing is that both of those things adding up made me realize stuff about myself
cheriladycl01 · 3 months
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Random Girl - Lando Norris x Actress! Reader
Plot: Y/N being spotted in the most random places you could think off and its gets to the point where people joke that they wouldn't be shocked if she posted a story from the ISS.
Credit to lqvesoph for the GIF
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Lando knew his girlfriend was a bit ditzy, but that was the whole appeal that she came with. However, what he didn't expect was when he was at race weekends by himself that she couldn't attend, he'd get notifications from gossip pages, new articles and pap pages showing his girlfriend to be spotted in the most random places possible.
It first started when they had only been dating for a few months, they'd met in the McLaren paddock where she'd been invited to a GP and brought her motorsport loving father along with her. They'd hit it off immediately. Lando was shy, having this well known actress talking to him like she'd known him all his life and kind of fumbled at the opportunity to ask her out to dinner after the race.
Of course, you had swooped in asking him yourself.
After those few dates, you both became busy. Crazily enough he still didn't know much about you. Obviously he knew enough, like your age and that you were from England and all of those other weird Wiki facts that people added to your profile after you'd stated them in interviews.
So when he saw a news article that was a picture of you, in what he deemed to be loungewear on a countryside town in the UK helping your dad out mucking the stables he couldn't help but texting and asking where you were.
When you'd replied at home, it made more sense but he was shocked as you seemed like the definition of a London city girl.
And of course you were a London City girl, but that didn't stop you going back home, to your routes and getting your hands a little dirty.
After this, you were then cast in the GranTurismo movie as Audrey the girlfriend of Jann Mardenborough. You made friends with Emelia Hartford, Archie Madekwe, Joshua Stradowski, Darren Barnet and Sang Heon Lee. Of course you were already familiar with Orlando Bloom and David Harbour having acted with them before.
It was funny however, how it wasn't public knowledge that you and Lando were an item yet and you were in a movie to do with racing. You both found it bazar, but it also wasn't the usual type of movie you were in. So when fans watched and then realized who you were rumored to be dating it all made sense.
The next was he was in his drivers room with his team mate Oscar, they were both aimlessly scrolling through TikTok waiting for their typical Thursday media duties when all of a sudden Oscar practically spat his water out, choking on it.
"Mate that's disgusting" Lando complains flicking the spitty water off his wrist.
"Tell me why your girlfriend is on my TikTok for you page weightlifting in the middle of London!" he asks rewinding the video just to make sure he wasn't seeing things and that it was you.
Without a doubt, it was you. Even with sunglasses and a Mclaren cap covering your face from the general public, he knew it was you. Not only could he tell it was you because he'd seen you so many times in the paddock and hanging out with his own girlfriend Lily that he'd introduced you to and you'd both become fast friends. But the noticeable thing was the massive keychain you were holding.
You were known for loosing stuff, so one Christmas the grid decided to all get you something to attach to your house and car keys. So whenever you left the house you didn't loose them. There was a pink fluffy ball attached that Max had got you, your Mclaren Car Key was showing, the Pirelli wheel Lewis had got you. The picture of you and Lando, Lando had got for you, there was an Yves St Laurent charm from Lewis and much more but it was so specific that Oscar knew it was you.
"What do you mean my girlfriend is weightlifting on your tiktok" he asks crawling onto the sofa from the ground that he was sat on, budging up closer to Oscar and looking over his shoulder to where he phone was playing the small segment.
There you were, placing your keys into your bag before hitching it high up on your arm and lifting the weight. It was heavy and from the rest of the video not many other people had managed to do it. However you there, in your high heels and short skirt you lifted it up no problem. He knew it was in your range as you often would work out with him, and sometimes you had a better stamina than he did. That was because of some of the movies you'd had to train for in the past, making you have a really serious work out regime.
The crowd applauded you before you did a kind curtsy taking the drink from the guy who was recording the video. As you lifted your glasses up taking a drink, people stared to recognize you and started to ask for pictures and autographs. The video cut out to the next lifter before he could see what occurred from the fans that were around you.
"Babe what the hell is this on Oscar's titkok of you weightlifting for free drinks from randoms in the street! Are you okay did you get mobbed? The video cut out before we could see anything. My god its so dangerous you shouldn't be out alone!" he scolds before even saying hi to you.
"Hello to you to Lando" he laugh and he sighs.
"You shouldn't do stuff like that baby, I worry!" he explains and you just giggle.
"I was fine Lan, I had security waiting for me behind the camera and there wasn't too many people! I was fine and got home all safe!" you smile into the phone rolling your eyes at your mum who was awing at how cute he was being. After a while he hung up needing to go for media duties.
Then during your first summer break together, you, Lily, Oscar and Lando all wanted to go on holiday together. So you all suggested somewhere you wanted to go, that couldn't be your home. So Lando suggested Lapland, Lily suggested Bali, Oscar suggested Greece and you suggested Florida, specifically Disneyworld so of course, yours had to be picked being the most likely place to be seen.
And of course if you were going to Florida you had to bring Logan... so obviously when pictures were released of you and the others being toured round the parks by a cast member and finding yourself building cars in Test Track in Epcot and Lando making a Lando Log out of it. The parks were extra busy when you guys went as well so you had to have your security walk round the parks with you, so you guys just drew all the attention to you.
After this you were in New York, filming the ending of the movie you were currently the lead in. So you couldn't come to the first race after summer break.
So when Lando was chilling out at home after the first race waiting for you to land back in France so he could drive and get you, he was watching TikTok's. He was aimlessly scrolling until he saw a video that was those ones where people go up to strangers with headphones and ask what they were listening too.
The guy clearly had no idea he was talking to you, a very famous actress but Lando once again was shocked how you seem to get yourself into these situation.
You politely take one airpod out and offer him a sorry i didn't understand. He asks what song your listening to and your reply had Lando bursting out laughing as it was Voulez-Vous by ABBA. He watched as you walked off with the song playing in the background as you took note of the camera and waved with a big grin.
He checked the comments knowing there would be an outrage that the guy didn't know who he was speaking too. And he was right of course.
-user1: how has my guy fumbled like that in front of Miss Y/N
-user2: no way my guy didn't know he's speaking to the richest young actress out there right now...
-user3: boy don't know Y/N Y/L/N and he's into F1... blunder fr
-user4: it's so funny where Y/N is caught out and how normal she is, she's just one of us at the end of the day
-user5: Y/N is spotted anywhere fr
The next time was when your mugshots got released, now this was the one that Lando found the most shocking. But after hearing your side of the story he was laughing and your manager eventually got the LAPD to apologize for their actions and their mistreatment.
"So Y/N some pictures were released of you ahead of this weekend following a big apology from the Los Angeles Police Department. Can you explain to us what happened?" the F1 interviewer asks and you chuckle a little.
"Yeah, its actually really funny considering i spent the day in a holding cell because no-one could get hold of me. So i was driving to set to start filming, and I was pulled over. I still don't know what I was actually pulled over for, they never ended up telling me. But when i was asked for ID i accidently handed over my Fake ID from the movie set. Once i realized my mistake I stupidly forgot we were in America where officers are a little more hands on and he decided to arrest me for handing a fake id to an officer of the law and interfering with an ongoing investigation. Obviously once people from set realised i wasn't just late they came down to the office and explain what i was trying to do, they re watched the footage from both my dash cam that was on me, and the officer's footage and it was deemed as an unlawful arrest so they let me go. I have no idea who leaked the mugshots but I still look good!" you exclaim making the interviewers laugh.
"That's quite the story Y/N, what do you get yourself into!" he offers making you laugh even more.
In the winter season, you taken some time off so you could travel round with Lando both for his last few races and his winter break, you spent his off season with him travelling from Bali, to Australia, to Finland, back home, and then to Thailand. But you had one request and that was to go tAmerica or South Korea to watch a KPOP concert.
You wanted to see StrayKids live, and so Lando not only got you front row tickets but also came with you to their LA show. You were sat in a normal bit of the crowd with other fans who when they noticed it was you were screaming before the artists themselves even came on.
It was even more funny when the group came out on stage and it took them 4 songs before they recognised you.
"Holy shit guys is that Y/N Y/L/N?" Chris asks looking down at the crowd where you were sat.
"Huge fan!" Hyunjin shouted, even though you had worked together before in Versace as Brand Ambassadors. Same with Felix and Yves Saint Laurent. Fans went crazy at the interactions happening and when it went viral later people only commented on the fact that you were just casually at a KPOP concert with your F1 driver boyfriend.
The next time was when Lando, who wasn’t opposed to going to a casino himself walked in on his girlfriend after a race at a casino. She was there at the Poker Table with winning chips animatedly talking to the dealer.
“Babe?” He’d asked you with a laugh surprised to see you here!
“Omg baby! Hi the guys said you were coming here and I wanted to surprise you but I ended up coming here a few hours to early and now I’ve won 30k. I’m thinking I’ll get you a new watch with that” she grins as if this 30k has just changed her life. When they know that 30k is absolutely nothing to her.
“You, how do you find yourself in these situations” he laughs looking over at you before tossing one of your chips into the pile looking at your current cards.
“Hey bet with your own money baby!” You frown at him everyone around the table laughing.
“Are we at the high stakes table right now?” He asks looking round and seeing some familiar faces of very rich men.
“Yeah baby why?” You ask nonchalantly, like it was nothing.
“My god, okay let’s wrap this up and go meet everyone else at the club”
And the most recent time was when you started live streaming from the top of the HollyWood sign after making the long climb up there.
Lando just watched from Bahrain, at pre- season testing while you were just climbing up to the Holly wood sign and showing the world where you were currently at.
He did worry for a second about your inability to know what you should and shouldn’t be showing the world and when. But when you panned round to show the two security with you in casual gym wear he was more settled.
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a-aexotic · 1 year
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HEYYYY! So like every other mf on the planet right now I am in my hunger games era!!
Please could you write a Finnick x Reader where she is selected for the quarter quell (Maybe in her games she was lethal and killed like 10+ people?)
And when Katniss shoots the arena in catching fire she gets taken by the capitol (Like Peeta) and they torture her and shit? Then Finnick and her get there reunion she’s all like battered and bruided and it’s dead sad? Not sure if this made sense because i’m half asleep and dyselxic but let me know😭🤣
Maybe he says “It’s okay baby i got you” ??? x
hey of course i can! i hope u enjoy it babe <3 its a tiny bit long! my apologizes
cw's: angst, mentions of killing/dying, typical thg stuff, torture, ptsd, lmk if i missed anything
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You were one of the youngest victors alongside Finnick, being only 15 and having won your games. You were also from District 4. You won the 68th Hunger Games, a few years after Finnick.
When you were reaped, Finnick and Mags were your mentors. Finnick came off as self absorbed and arrogant but once you started talking to him, the more you realized that was total bullshit. He wasn't how the Capitol portrayed him, he was much more caring and compassionate. He was very sympathetic to your situation, having gone through the same things.
During your time in the arena, you were one of the most ruthless tributes of all time. In the beginning, you were easily overlooked. The tributes weren't thinking that you were going to be much of a challenge because of your size and the way you carried yourself.
But that was exactly how you wanted to be portrayed. You tricked the Careers into thinking you were some naïve little girl, stabbing them in the back (literally) the first chance you got. The Capitol loved the turn of events, cheering you on.
When you had come back home, you had finally understood the intensity of what you had done. You had killed a whole group of people, ending their lives permanently. Those people had lives and family who loved them, and now they're gone because of you.
You suffered through months and months from never ending nightmares. Even getting consoled by your mother didn't help anymore; she doesn't understand. You didn't even feel worthy of food anymore.
You closed off Mags and Finnick when you had come home, driving yourself into isolation and depression. You rarely went out anymore, eating one meal a day and slept more than 80% of the day. Even sleeping couldn't mend the eternal tiredness you had, the void that filled your body.
Finnick had felt more than responsible for your pain. He gave you time before he realized he was just adding to your pain. Even when you didn't communicate back to him, Finnick visited you every day. He gave you advice and told you what he had went through after the Games as well. Eventually you opened up more to Finnick, and slowly, he had become your best friend.
He had told you that numbing it wasn't going to make it go away. He reminded you that you had him and Mags to help you with this process, and that you weren't alone despite of how you felt.
He helped you regain your sense of purpose again, your self image again. Finnick had singlehandedly helped you rebuilt your sense of self again.
He saw a part of you in him, that scared 14 year old boy who was trying to go back home to his parents. He never wanted anyone to feel that, especially you.
He promised you that he would never let anything bad ever happen to you again.
During your Victor's tour, Snow had suddenly deemed you desirable by the Capitol, wanting to sell you as he did with Finnick. Finnick couldn't risk getting involved, wanting to protect his family.
Every night in the Capitol, you were always consoled by Finnick. Every time you had to do a favor, you remember walking to Finnick's room to sleep, not baring the thought of having to sleep alone in the cold bed. He was always there, holding your hand comfortingly as you both slept.
The Capitol adored you both, nicknaming you the princess and prince of Panem. The more time you spent with Finnick, the more the media had speculated a relationship between the young victors.
You and Finnick had connected in many ways. Both having the same trauma, it was easy to talk to him and for him to understand how hard it was.
You and Finnick eventually got together a few years later, then getting married (in secret, of course) almost right after. You were both deeply in love.
Finnick found solace in the thought of always having you by his side, remembering that no one could tear you apart. That was until the Quarter Quell was announced.
You and Finnick were sitting at the edge of the couch, listening to Caesar's words carefully as he explained that this year's Hunger Games was going to be very different.
When it was announced that there will be only be Victors in this year's games, you heard dropped. You looked over at Finnick and he shared the same terrified look on his face.
--
When Annie's name had been called, you without any second thought, put up your hand. "I volunteer as tribute."
The crowd gasped and you looked over at Annie and you could tell she was a bit relived but still scared nonetheless. You immediately embraced her tightly, letting her let out a small sob. "It's okay, you're okay."
Mags looked just as terrified and you took her hand. When Finnick's name was called, you felt your stomach drop. Not only were you back in the arena, but you were with Finnick.
You looked over at Finnick and he looked prepared to fight. You both stood up and he grabbed your hand, raising it up in union.
The trainride to the Capitol was pretty uneventful. Finnick had wanted some time to think about the plan and so did you. A part of you knew what he was planning; he kill everyone else in the arena and then eventually himself, all for you.
As you sat on the bed, you felt the sadness and anger turn into numbness. No amount of crying was going to stop the Quater Quell and you had to be smart.
You didn't want to survive without Finnick. You were either winning with him or dying with him. Life would be meaningless without him.
Finnick knocked on your door slightly, before walking in. You looked up at him and he gave you a small smile. He took a seat next to and took your hand.
"I have a plan."
"Finnick, I know what you're thinking, and no. You're not killing yourself for me."
Finnick looked defeated. "One of us has to survive, Y/N. For Annie. For Mags."
You look a deep inhale, looking away from Finnick. "I don't want to life without you, everything would lose all it's meaning without you."
Finnick felt his heart burst into two pieces as he squeezed your hand. You felt your eyes watering again and you couldn't help but let out another quiet cry as Finnick pulled your head in, as he embraced you tightly.
"Shh, it's okay. I promise, I won't... I won't leave you."
--
It had all happened so fast, you couldn't even comprehend what had just happened. One moment, you were with Finnick trying to find Johanna and Katniss and suddenly there was big loud boom. You were relieved for a moment; Plutarch's plan had worked. Until you realized how far away you were from the others.
You were wandering, trying to find anyone until you heard people behind you. You turned and then you saw some unfamiliar faces; suddenly, your vision went black.
Then, you woke up in a white room. You felt like your stomach had dropped out of your body once the realization hit you; the Capitol captured you.
You were strapped down to a bed and you couldn't move or shake it off. The severity of the situation had hit you; even if by some miracle you did escape, where would you go? How would you find your way to 13 and back to Finnick?
You knew how ruthless the Capitol was to everyone who disobeyed them. Your worst fears had come true and there was no getting out of here.
You heard the door open and you saw some Peacekeepers come in and then you saw the person you dreaded to see most; Snow. You felt like your whole had come crashing down, how could this nightmare become any worse?
"Hello, Y/N."
You didn't respond, resorting to stare at the wall in front of you instead.
He tutted disappointedly. "Out of all the tributes, you were the one I expected least to be involved in this mess. You are the Princess of Panem... What a shame."
You still hadn't replied and you hadn't dared to look at Snow. Months and months you spent trying to heal the trauma he had caused you, you were sure if you had to look at him now, you would break.
"I want to take mercy on you, dear Y/N. If you tell me everything you know about the rebellion, I will make sure the Peacekeepers are gentle with you."
You shook your head. "No."
He let out a small chuckle. "Sorry, I couldn't hear you. What?"
"No." You said again, louder.
He hummed in disapproval. "Okay then, you leave me no choice. You are going to regret this."
He nodded to the Peacekeepers and walked out of the room. You were then met with Peacekeepers, loosening the straps then taking you to another room.
If Snow knew one thing about you, it was that being only physical with you wouldn't hurt you enough. He had to hit you were it hurt most.
They threw you in the seemingly vacant room and immediately locking it. You were confused until you heard it.
"Y/N, help me!" Finnick's voice screamed. "Please, help me! Get up and do something, they're killing me! Please."
You looked everywhere in the dark room, trying to find the source. It kept going.
"Y/N, please! Help! What the hell are you doing, just sitting there? You are such a disappointment!" The voice started shouting. "We should've just left you to died in the arena! You are useless!"
Now this was something new. Your body was filled with panic and fear and even though you knew it was fake, you felt like you were going to throw up from all the noise.
Suddenly, Annie's voice came in as well. Then Johanna's. Then your mother's. There was nonstop noise filled with screams for help, shouting with disapproving messages. Your body couldn't handle it; it was so overwhelmed with fear that you started shaking on the ground, putting your hands on your ears but that did little to nothing.
You wanted it to stop. It was too much, you were trembling. It felt like days, just sitting there in that room listening to all those demeaning voices of your loved ones. You couldn't even think straight anymore.
It was so bad you had started to pound your head on the ground, screaming and crying. You had have enough. And then, it all stopped. Silence was foreign for you; your ears were ringing.
You were sitting on the ground, almost lifeless as the Peacekeepers took you away. Your eyes hurt from the tears, your body sore, your ears ringing and your head was pounding.
But you knew that was just the beginning.
--
You were asleep in bed and you were awakened by the door opening, you instantly jolted up. You looked over to see a group of masked men in front of you and you had started to tremble again, silent tears rolling down your face, thinking that the Peacekeepers had come again.
"No, no, no." You started to mumble to yourself.
A man came up to your and took your bruised hand slowly, rubbing it gently in silent empathy. That was the first soft touch you'd felt in a few weeks and it almost stung.
"It's okay, you're safe now. You're going to 13 now."
You had to blink a couple times, trying to process what he said. Was this a dream? You went to pinch yourself but it was real life.
He then helped you up but you couldn't help but stumble; your legs were weak, you couldn't remember the last time the Peacekeepers let you walk for this long.
As you got into the hovercraft, you saw Annie. Your eyes widened as you both ran up to each other, embracing each other. She had started to cry a little bit and so did you.
That was when it hit you. You were going to see Finnick. You were going home. You started crying into Annie's shoulder as she held you. "We're safe now, we're safe."
You had seen Johanna as well but she didn't seem too responsive. Neither did Peeta. You fell asleep on Annie's shoulder on the ride back and for the first time, you actually felt yourself drifting off calmly.
--
There were lots of doctors and nurses looking at you and asking you all sorts of questions and you tried your best to answer them. You were still in shock; you were safe. They couldn't hurt you anymore.
"Y/N?" You turned around to see Finnick. You immediately got up from the examiner's table and ran into his arms, your eyes starting to water up again.
"Finnick," you sighed slowly. You pulled away, putting your hands on his face and touched him as if he wasn't real.
"Are you.. Are you really here?"
"Yes, I'm really here." Finnick looked at you and suddenly his voice transported you back into the dark room. You quickly twisted out of his embrace and his expression changed.
His voice was back and you heard all of the nasty things he had to you. You back away, stumbling into the examiner's table and your breathing became heavy. "No, no, no, please-please go away. No."
You slid down to the floor and you closed your eyes, putting your hands on your ears and rocking back and forth trying to get that voice to stop.
Finnick ran up to you and put his hands on your knees, trying to get you to look at him. His heart broke in half; he didn't know what the Capitol had done to you but now he knows it has something to do with him.
Of course the Capitol would try to ruin him. His eyes started to tear up at the sight of you, in so much pain and panic.
You opened your eyes, Finnick in front of you. You started to cry some more before Finnick slowly went up to you, wrapping his arms around you.
When he had started wrapping your arms around you, your instinct was to push him away but his warmth was welcoming and safe and you started to focus on his touch. The voices slowly drifted away, the sounds of your silent sobs only being heard.
You then gave into Finnick's touch, falling into him and putting your head in his chest as he caressed your back gently, shushing you.
"It's okay baby, I got you. You're safe now, they can't hurt you."
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mywritingonlyfans · 9 months
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Rapture. // Cillian Murphy X Reader. (Smut!)
prompt: You're younger, and love partnered with Cillian in filming a movie. He's developed certain feelings for you and finding himself struggling with them recently, until things get worse with the idea of a sex scene being added to the script. (age gap, wax play and some other sex stuff)
words: 4,3K.
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He had received the script update that morning, and as he saw your eyes shift away from him during casual conversations before rehearsals, he knew you had read the new scenes. Both of you were aware of the possibility of that much-discussed sex scene that the director was considering adding. However, neither of you had imagined how it would play out, and the thought of being partially undressed in front of each other felt somewhat odd. Still, Cillian couldn't help but envision the words he had read earlier that morning coming to life in just a few weeks' time.
Now, you were sitting across from him, wearing a loose blouse and comfortable shorts, with your legs crossed. Your fingers tapped lightly on the script as you read your lines. As the others left the room, he realized that your nervousness wasn't about needing to rehearse in a few minutes, but about him being there. Cillian had initially dismissed his thoughts about you, attributing them to the recent divorce he was going through. However, he soon realized that these feelings were more than just passing thoughts.
He had already developed a pure and genuine admiration for you. He found himself lost in daydreams of conversations you could have, where he could rest your head on his chest and kiss your forehead, assuring you that everything was alright. Just as he found himself reliving the moments when you would get excited and talkative about the books you were reading after he mentioned that he had already read them. Each time you passionately shared your thoughts and enthusiasm for the stories, he couldn't help but be captivated by your animated expressions. The way your eyes would light up, the gestures you made, and the genuine joy in your voice made him smile, even long after the conversations had ended.
Yet, your expressions, your smiles, and your worries were too precious for him, but he reminded himself daily that such feelings were wrong, even though he couldn't stop them from growing.
What used to be harmless had taken a different turn after those new scenes were added to your interactions. Reading the scene had been somewhat painful, but seeing you there in person made it even more overwhelming (though not necessarily bad). The room was small, with scented candles around, something the director believed would help the actors feel at ease, though that wasn't the result Cillian was experiencing. He was practically lying in front of you, trying to make himself comfortable, avoiding looking into your eyes, though he hadn't noticed that his hands were sweaty and his breathing was heavier.
Still, he mustered the courage to gaze at you for a brief moment, trying to keep his thoughts from spiraling. "You've read it, haven't you? How do you feel?" Your nervous laughter was adorable, and your hands tightened around the script, making him notice how delicate and smaller they were compared to his own. "Yeah, I read it," your voice sounded weak, and he waited for your prolonged sigh before you continued. "I've never done something like this before, not even in theater." His face turned red, and he tried to comfort you with just a look. Touching you at this moment felt like a terrible idea, but he still did it, sitting next to you, making sure his shoulder touched yours. Contrary to what he thought, you seemed to relax at the contact, appearing more relieved. "It must be strange having to do this scene with me, given that I have no experience. Sometimes I feel like I'm not bringing positive results to your work." He immediately shook his head, hating it when you belittled yourself. You were incredibly talented.
Still, he lingered on those words. How inexperienced were you really? He had to control himself not to sound breathless as he continued, "You actually make it more enjoyable, and it'll be fine. If you agree, we can go through the lines before filming the scene. And if there's anything I can do to make you feel more at ease with this or anything else, I'll be right here." You turned to him, your angelic face now less worried, and nodded, unsure of what to say. There was a comfortable silence, and Cillian found himself smiling with closed eyes. Stopping these thoughts might be better, but they were inevitable. All he could do was wait and deal with it when the time came, even if there were more scenes after this, as well as marketing and interviews after all the filming...
...
He woke up feeling hot, drops of sweat on his temples and his chest damp. His mouth was dry, and his mind was still on your slightly parted lips, imagining how they would grow wetter as you felt him on your skin the previous night. He felt tight in his shorts, and your scent near him caused a pounding in his head. You were peacefully asleep as if you had never given yourself to him, as if you hadn't suggested adding more intensity to your lovemaking after exhausting all your muscles and neurons together. He hugged your body tighter, wrapping his arms around your waist to pull you closer against him. You snuggled into him, and he brushed your hair away from your face and neck, kissing the spot with caution, yet urgency, until you slowly woke up and reciprocated. Your touch was delicate and gentle, just as he had fantasized before, and it fed his mind entirely.
And you felt like you could still taste yourself on him as he intensified the kisses, and your control was slipping away with each firm squeeze he gave your hips and how solidly hard he was against you. Cillian was aware that you enjoyed it—the marks left, the momentary pain when he bit your thigh, and the darker hues that you hid the next day from the intense way he kissed your breasts while you rode him. Your serene eyes and slightly parted lips showed calm facial expressions, and you found yourself surrendering to him fully. Despite no apparent reason except him being older than you, and even though it might be considered inappropriate, he found himself enjoying the thought while your features became even more devoted.
He unbuttoned your last buttons, leaving his hands free to explore every inch of you, and smiled at your soft moan when his fingers touched the marks under your breast. He kissed the spot, running his tongue over the sensitive skin, and grunted at your soft whimper. Your head was buried deep in the pillow, and Cillian didn't hesitate to position himself so he had a full view of you.
"I have an idea, I think you'll like it," he whispered, out of breath, and you chuckled in response. The room was still dark, far from dawn, and the only illumination came from the scented candles you kept on the nightstand to create a soothing sleeping environment. He had them well-reserved in his mind at the moment.
"Can I hear it first, sir?" you asked curiously, completely surrendering to this. Cillian loved how you trusted him without even needing to hesitate, even though there was no apparent reason to trust him other than him being older than you, and even though it might be considered inappropriate. He found himself enjoying that thought as your features became even more devoted. He nodded and unbuttoned your last buttons, leaving his hands free to explore every inch of you, smiling at your soft moan when his fingers touched the marks under your breast. He kissed the spot, running his tongue over the sensitive skin, and grunted at your soft whimper. Your head was buried deep in the pillow, and Cillian didn't hesitate to position himself so he had a full view of you.
"I'll try it, and you'll tell me if it's not okay, alright?" You were a bit whiny and clearly still sensitive from the previous hours, and he loved that. Your gaze was satisfied, and your muscles visibly relaxed; he loved the effect he had on you. You nodded, "I'm okay, Cill." Your hands went to his hair as he moved to your collarbone, showering it with kisses, bites, sucks, and eventually, firm grips. He could taste the flavor of your moans and cries on the tip of his tongue.
 Something about it felt so real it burned in him. The recorded scene of the film was recurrent and he was there confirming the perfection of what he had seen before.
He enjoyed the way you let him do whatever he wanted with you, how it consumed his mind and forced him to maintain control, not to go too far with you. The knowledge that no one had touched you before, tasted you, or marked you in such an intense way only heightened everything further. His teeth chattered, and his knees felt weak at what was to come.
Pulling away, he gracefully tugged on your hair, and his chest was filled with your half-closed, half-tired gaze that seemed to pierce him. He rubbed against the sheets beneath him, feeling sore just from the thought alone, and you chuckled sweetly. His head swirled, and he leaned over and grasped the candle holder, his fingertips briefly turning red from the heat. You paid more attention, adjusting yourself on the pillow, but he disapproved, "You don't need to do that; I want you to relax like before, princess. Just focus on emptying your mind, lie down and be cute."
You did nothing but nod and return to your previous position, but this time letting your body go limp wasn't so easy. You could feel how wet you were from the mere thought of what had already corrupted your mind. Still between your legs, Cillian caressed the inside of your thigh, and you realized you had closed them; your mind was cluttered and hard to control. You spread them apart, leaving no room for ambiguity, making it clear that you didn't want him to hold back with whatever this was. He positioned himself better between you, allowing you to feel how heavy he was even with layers of fabric between you—his shorts and your panties. You could swear you already had a wet spot in yours. Your chest was desperate, rising up and falling down slowly, and Cillian couldn't look at you without wiping the satisfied smile off his face. 
He raised the candle holder, and you could feel the heat on your breasts, your nipples excited by the sensation. The flicker of the fire was reflected in his eyes, and your lips pressed firmly together. You stifled a whimper, but couldn't hold back the whining when the wax dripped onto your sensitive skin that had already been exhausted by him. "I want to hear you, don't hold back," his high-pitched voice with a serious expression, his lines well-defined from how focused he was, left you dazed, and you needed to grind against him strongly, causing both of you to grunt and release the air from your lungs. He was happy with this, happy that you were desperate and that he was causing you some pain.
Cillian lifted the candle again and watched the droplets of wax fall onto you, tracing a line from the center of your breasts to your lower belly. Compared to his, your face was angelic with each movement, the soft moans leaving your expression even more inviting as you felt small in front of him. Your stomach clenched, and your face displayed a mixture of pain along with soft, adorable moans that made him want to explode. His hands trembled, and he had to focus hard not to finish right then and there and be done with it.
"Fuck, pumpkin, you look so good," and you enjoyed how seeing you like this had that effect on him. Your eyes closed, and everything felt intensified; your hips involuntarily spasmed against his, but it was a futile act. He audibly laughed from time to time, sweet and mature yet perverse, as if to make it clear how satisfying this was for him, and it left you completely dizzy and longing for more. He peeled off some hardened wax from your skin, admiring the marks it had left, and after massaging the area for a while he allowed the liquid to accumulate as it burned, running his tongue over the area and sucking the skin to him.
Your nails dug into his shoulder with enough force to leave crescent moons, and he let go, his teeth clearly imprinted on your skin, your fervor only making him more determined. He ran his thumb over the spot that would later be darkened and poured the excess of wax into you. Your legs tightened around him, and your hands grasped the sheets, tears welling up in your eyes, and your whimpering was soft but pleading, not exactly knowing what plea was being conveyed through it all. "Fuck, Cill, fuck, fuck," you tried hard for some relief. He halted his movements, forcing your legs to stop and holding your arms down to the mattress. He was delicate yet firm, just as you needed. You had a safe word; he knew you were okay, you were just trying to get his attention.
The holder, with the candle still burning, was now beside the sheets next to you. "Look at me, babygirl." You swallowed hard, tears streaming down the sides of your face. "Let's be good and not knock over the candle," he said firmly and clearly, and you nodded in pure eagerness, watching his well-defined and prominent muscles due to the force with which he was holding you. He kissed your face, wiping away the salty dampness, then moved to your mouth, which you wisely captured in a somewhat desperate act. He pulled away slowly, a thin trail of saliva connecting you both and slowly fading away.
He chuckled, and with no more, held your jaw and used his thumb to make you open your lips for him, sealing them with his, and soon you felt the buildup in you, and with a fuller sigh, you swallowed his breath over the messy kisses, feeling somewhat comforted. He caressed your cheek with his fingers, studying you, and you stuck your teeth into them, still trying not to move too much and be good. It was obvious you were struggling with this task. "It's good, Cill, I don't mind." He continued with more kisses and wet bites on your body, tightly gripping the open bars of your shirt with a gentle yet firm grip, almost causing your back to lift slightly off the mattress in need of him. It wasn't hard to tell you were younger, just looking at your genuine eyes was enough, and the reminder of that, that it was wrong in a way, made him want more of it all.
"Stay still, or we won't get anywhere, pumpkin," he said, and indeed you had forgotten about the candle by your side. You couldn't and wouldn't let it fall. He still sensed your scent so prominently on you, a lingering blend of sweat from the night before. Dry droplets adorned your panties, and a damp spot in the center was visibly apparent; it was adorable in his eyes. He kissed the area, gently brushing his nose against it, and you let out a graceful sigh. And once again, he found himself immersed in the feeling of having you like this, a sensation that was exclusively his. No one else had the privilege.
Unable to hold back any longer, Cillian pushed the thin fabric down and traced his tongue through you. He was familiar with it, but each time he tasted you, it fueled him with more energy. He didn't need to go too deep; you were already sticky enough, and yet clearly sensitive, a delightful mess nonetheless. Cillian pushed your swollen lips up, reaching your intended spot, and he licked it avidly. You gasped, your fists clenching the sheets. He blew on the spot and sucked on it for his own pure pleasure; he loved how the smell and taste lingered vividly in his mind afterward. However, he knew neither of you could last much longer in this way, and it wasn't how he wanted to end things.
He tightened his fingers on your thighs, using more of you, already feeling his chin and cheeks sticky from you. Reluctantly, he withdrew, mesmerized by how your essence still overflowed his mouth as he swallowed deeply, seeking oxygen. Your whimpering turned more pleading and disapproving, and he understood; he felt the same way, sore and neglected, begging for any hint of relief.
"I'm being good, Cill." Your eyes were wide open as you pleaded your case. He nodded, wiping the corners of his mouth with his fingers and still licking them to avoid any waste. It only quickened your breathing, and he felt a twinge of pity.
"You are, babygirl, you're being wonderful." He massaged his fingertips into you, spreading the burning sensation. You wouldn't be able to stay still even if you wanted to.
"You're okay, right?" he asked, pushing his fingers in slowly and deftly to fill you, watching your eyes squeeze shut tightly and your back arching a little.
"I am. I'd tell you if I weren't," you sounded weak, with sweat glistening on your forehead. It wasn't a very convincing vision, but Cillian trusted that you'd speak up if something was wrong. He moved his fingers until you got accustomed to the feeling and relaxed, making sure you wouldn't have any trouble taking him after. But you were so wet that he knew you could handle him easily even without much stretching. He made a mental note to try that later.
He pulled his fingers away, his hand sticky and wet from the excess that had dribbled, his mind taken by you, all the positions, and possibilities.
"No waste, remember?" You recalled something he had told you. Soon, your hands were around his wrist, and he didn't hesitate to let you take his fingers into your mouth, enveloping them and sucking on your sweet flavor, your eyes closing as he savored the sensation only he could describe. Your touch of sweetness and genuineness taking him over completely.
"Enough," he declared, pulling them away from you, leaving you with sad, pleading eyes. You could easily be death of him if you wanted.
You felt a bit hazy, things moving fast but still light, and surprisingly comforting after just waking up. You couldn't say when or how, but as you shifted slightly in bed and your eyes met his, he had already managed to shed his shorts. He was pulsating; he wouldn't last much longer, and you could tell he had held back for quite some time until then.
"I love how you look," he chuckled, smugness evident. His cheeks and the tip of his nose were flushed from the stress. His hair, with some strands of gray, fell over his face, and before you could brush it away, he held your arms again. You gasped, hesitating, and he forced your body onto the mattress, his weight and legs spreading yours apart. Lightly, he closed the gap between you, then settled inside you. As he had imagined, he slid in skillfully. Your head was thrown back, and you felt complete ecstasy just from finally having him after such a wait, even though it burned, and Cillian didn't feel much different.
His grunts were deep, and it made you even more flustered and messy for him. He rose, still dripping from your body, holding the candle holder. Even though he hadn't planned to tease since he was just as eager, he proceeded anyway. His hand rested on your waist, and without moving, he allowed you to ride him slowly with lazy thrusts to get what you wanted. You were shy, and your movements were as delicate as your body, adjusting to his as if you couldn't let him know. Soon he would be emptying himself inside you, deep, and that made him pant. In the meantime, he measured the droplets of wax over your belly and breasts, watching in awe as your body trembled from exhaustion.
Your moans were mostly breathless tones, and your mouth remained partially open. Your eyes never left him, of how his v-line joined yours as he filled you perfectly, until all the air left your lungs. He let a few drops fall on his own abdomen, grunting hoarsely at the warmth of him, and he smiled sweetly as your hips stopped their motion, and you focused solely on watching him.
Cillian paused, gently placing the candle holder back on the nightstand, and he tenderly turned you over onto your belly on the bed. You complied with grace, leaning forward to be closer to him, not holding back your affection. He cradled you, running his fingers through your hair, and his body welcomed yours against his chest. With utmost care, he joined with you, moving deep and fervently, his movements filled with passion, turning your whimpers into soft moans of pleasure.
The sight of you brought him immense joy, and he cherished the intimacy you shared. He was overwhelmed by the depth of his feelings for you, and he wanted nothing more than to fill you up warmly. He knew he had to be gentle, to ensure your comfort, and to respect your boundaries. Even more knowing you weren't used to that.
With each tender touch, he felt the connection between you both, savoring the moments of ecstasy that flowed between your bodies. He marveled at the depth of your trust in him, and he felt an overwhelming desire for more and more of you.
As he continued, he held you close, your hands seeking his to anchor you in the intensity of the experience. The room was filled with the sweet sounds of your pleasure, and he was enthralled by the way your body responded to his touch.
He adored every moment, every caress, and every gasp that escaped your lips. As your passion reached its peak, he held you tightly, ensuring you felt safe and into his arms. Your shared climax made him dizzy, leaving you both breathless and content.
Afterwards, he stroked your back, waist, and shoulders, reveling in the intimacy you had just shared. He admired the marks and traces left on your body.
"I treasure every moment with you," he whispered, his voice filled with adoration and a strong accent.
You smiled softly, feeling the warmth of him envelop you. His presence brought you comfort and peace, and you knew that you were deeply his.
With a caring touch, he wiped away the traces of passion from your lips, and you savored the lingering taste of him on your tongue.  You nestled even closer to him, and he let you, holding you tighter. You could still feel him oozing between your legs, the liquid turning cold, tingling a little from the soreness, but it felt great. You knew he would treat you like precious pearls, bathing you and leaving you clean before you went to sleep, and that was comforting.
"I'd never let a single drop go to waste," you said, your voice filled with sincerity. Your eyes are genuine and serene as you watch him, as if you really had no dimension to it. And then, you got filled into his solemn and comforting laughter at your fragile soul causing a pleasant vibration in your body.
...
His eyes opened as if breaking free from a suffocating hold, his head emerging above water, and oxygen flooding back into his lungs. Nevertheless, he remained still, feeling a warm weight on his shoulder and his pants suddenly tighter and less comfortable. Slowly, awareness seeped into his brain, and he became conscious of his surroundings. He felt a sense of worry, unable to move even if he wanted to. Gently, he brushed aside strands of hair from your face without touching your skin, observing how peacefully you rested against him, completely oblivious to his internal turmoil when it came to you.
He gazed at the ceiling, still wrapped in the comfort of your body's warmth against his own. Despite his mind being entangled with images of you, with your hand between your thighs and your cheek pressed against his shoulder, your lips slightly parted and looking so delicate and untouched, he couldn't bring himself to meet your eyes directly anymore. The once sweet thoughts now mingled with wilder and more fervent desires, a concoction of heated emotions that overwhelmed him. He felt like he wouldn't be able to endure all of it until the end. He already felt completely entangled and trapped.
As he lay there, he found himself torn between the conflicting emotions that had taken hold of him. The intensity of his feelings for you had reached a point where he couldn't contain them any longer. It was as if everything had shifted, and what was once a tender connection now burned with a passionate fire. He did desire you and that horrible way, but he had also fallen for you, and it frightened him.
The realization that he had developed such strong emotions for someone so close and yet so out of reach weighed heavily on him. He couldn't help but wonder what would happen if you ever found out, or worse, if he acted on those impulses. He wished he could go back to the simpler times, when he could bask in the innocence of your presence. But it was too late. He had crossed a threshold, and there was no turning back. The feelings were there, tangible and consuming.
On top of it all, the candles still exuded essence as they burned hot and bright before his field of vision.
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skzstannie · 4 months
Text
“What about Ben?”
SKZ-> ot8 x 9th member fem! reader
genre: angst, hurt/comfort wc: ~4,800 cw: reader has a panic attack and depression, Ben is ur lil bro
summary: your mom isn’t happy about your absence at your brother’s birthday party, but she takes her anger a step too far this time
A/N: Happy New Year everyone! I hope everyone has a blessed 2024! Part 2s for both the Felix and the Han fic are underway, so send me an ask if you’d like to be added to the tag list for either of them!
Happy Scrolling! | Masterlist
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"Mom, you know I can't just up and leave! What are you expecting me to do?"
You find yourself having the same conversation with your parents time and time again- they want you to come home, you can't come home, then they give you the silent treatment for a period of time until they want you to come home for something else.
It's mentally exhausting, having to deal with their constant negative remarks towards you job. You only do it for your little brother; him growing up without you is not in the cards for you. In fact, that's what this argument you're having with your mom is about this time.
"I expect you to put your family first for once in your life!" your mother yells back. You flinch, pulling the phone away from your ear.
"Mom, you know I wouldn't miss Ben's birthday unless I absolutely have to. I want to be there for him, I really do!" your words do little to convince her as she already has her mind made up about the type of person you are.
"This has happened one too many times. Missing the occasional family gathering is one thing, but it’s your brother's birthday." Her disgust easily wafts through the speaker of your phone, and you bite your lip to keep from absolutely lashing out at her.
Your parents were never understanding of your job. They always expected you to just pack up your bags and fly home for the smallest of things.
Your baby cousin said her first words? "Why aren't you here?"
Your little brother lost another tooth? "Why would you want to miss this important milestone?"
Your grandma got a new dog? "What kind of heartless person denies their grandparents?"
Over and over, you've been criticized for your job. You give them the same explanation each time, as it's the truth.
"I'm sorry, Mom. I want to be there; I really really do. It's just that-"
"Always with the excuses. Ya know what? I'm tired of the excuses," she pauses and your breath hitches in your throat.
"Ma?" your voice is choked up, and you find your lip wobbling from where it's pulled between your mouth.
Your mother sighs, her disappointment evident. "We're done with the excuses, Y/N. If you can't be here for us, I don't think this is going to work out."
You swear your heart stops upon hearing her words. "What do you mean?" the laugh you let out is far from humorous. It's desperate. "How could it not work out? I'm your daughter, there's nothing to work out. You're supposed to love me and care for me, unconditionally."
"You've crossed the line too many times. Don't try to spin this around and make me the bad guy. This is completely your fault, you and those stupid boys."
Your parents could talk trash about you all they want, but you never let them get away with saying stuff about your boys. "You can belittle me, argue with me, call me every name in your book, but I will not let you talk about the guys like that. They're my family, too," your almost able to catch yourself, but you realize your mistake far too late.
"Oh, yea? Well, if those guys are your family, why not spend the rest of your time with them, too. It’s not like you weren’t already planning to anyway. Spend your holidays with them, your birthdays with them. He’ll, what do you even need us for?”
Tears well in your eyes, a mix of anger and fear swelling deep in your gut. "Mom, you know that's not what I meant." You’re completely choked up, your words coming out just above a whisper in volume.
You've had fights, but they never go as far as this. Usually, your mom would've hung up by now, leaving you with nothing but radio silence for months on end.
As toxic as this is, she's your mom. You couldn't live this life without her. She's toxic now, using your vulnerability against you every chance she gets, but she wasn't always that way.
She was once a loving mother, one who packed your lunch every morning for school, sending you off with a kiss on your cheek. A mom who'd pay extra to get more of your school pictures so she could put them on her desk at work and in her car. She used to show her love for you as any mother does, but you havent felt that in so long.
The last time you were home was a little over two months ago, and not once did she hug you, kiss you, or even touch you. She was cold and emotionless towards you.
You should've seen it coming. All this tension building up for months on end, it was going to have to bottom out eventually.
As much as the above is true, the words that flew out her mouth next shocked you beyond belief, causing the tears to flow freely from your waterline.
"Don't come back home, Y/N. I'm serious. You've done too much damage to my family." There’s a beeping on the other end of the phone, and it drops from your shaking hand to the carpeted floor beneath you.
Don't come back?
You were always sorry, apology after apology leaving your lips when you had to miss something your family organized. You thought it'd be okay. Your mom would get over herself eventually, and you'd come home when the company allowed you to.
You pick up the phone, hands a trembling mess, and call back, praying for another chance to explain yourself. You’re met with an automated message, the robotic voice piercing your ear.
"I'm sorry, this customer is unavailable."
You hang up and call again. She wouldn't have blocked you. It was just a silly fight, right?
"I'm sorry, this customer is-" you hang up before the message finishes, throwing your phone onto the floor next to you.
Your sobs become audible, and your body crumbles onto the floor, your knees thankful for the soft surface the carpet provides. Your fingers claw at the skin around your eyes, looking for a relief from the emotional pain coursing through your body.
Red lines mark your face, leaving the areas tender and puffy.
Your heart constricts in betrayal.
How could she?
She raised you, gave birth to you. How was it so easy for her?
The thought of your little brother enters your jumbled thoughts, and your heart breaks further.
He’s only six years old, and he is the best little brother you could ever ask for. He loves with all his heart, and you are lucky enough to get to experience it, to be apart of that little circle he could wrap his arms around and squeeze with all his might.
The thought of never squishing his chubby cheeks again destroys you, and you're unable to express the amount of heartache you're feeling.
So you scream.
You scream loud, your emotions ripping through your throat like shards of glass through skin.
You’re too distraught to notice the door to your bedroom whipping open. Chan and Minho stand there in the doorway, their eyes wide and mouths agape.
They've never seen you like this before. They've never seen anybody like this before, actually. Your screams are manic as they bounce off the walls around you, echoing around the room.
Once their shock dies off, they rush over to you. Minho is gentle in his grip but firm as he pries your hands away from your face. He gasps when he sees the damage your nails have already done, your once soft features now blotchy with angry red streaks.
You continue to scream, your nails now digging into Minho's arm. Chan grabs you from behind, doing his best to soothe you out of your hysteria.
"Y/N, you have to calm down. Please, it's ok, shhh," he says, his hold around you tight in an attempt to give you some sense of security.
"What happened? Can you talk to us?" you ignore Minho.
They accept that you're too worked up too answer them, and they let you finish your episode, the two of them doing everything they can to try and soothe you.
The rest of the guys in the dorm stand in the doorway now, your cries too agonizing for them to ignore. Varying degrees of shock are spread across their faces as they watch.
Chan starts to mumble sweet words to you as you come out of your panic attack, your brain finally able to register your surroundings again.
“It hurts,” you whimper, chest aching. “It’s so hard to breathe.”
"It's ok, we're here," he repeats, his head pressed up against the side of yours.
"Tell us five things you can see right now," Minho says from beside you, his grip still tight around your sweaty hands.
Your voice is scratchy, your throat red and scarred from your screams, but you oblige, knowing this will help you ground yourself. "I see my alarm clock," your eyes scan your room, landing on the bright digital clock you have sitting on your bedside table.
"Good," he hums, "What else?"
Your eyes travel to the door and you see the scared faces of the rest of your members. You lock in on Felix, his hands clenched tightly in front of him as salty tears stream down his face.
"I see Felix," you whisper, the pain from your throat becoming more and more noticeable.
He nods his head. "Good, now three more things. What else do you see?"
You look to your opened closet, your eyes catching the way your clothes spill out of your messy dresser onto your floor. "I see my favorite hoodie. I see my curtains, and I see that stain on my wall."
"Perfect, Y/N. Take a few deep breaths now." You breathe with Minho, your erratic breaths eventually matching his steady ones.
Finally calmed down enough, you slump back into Chan's hold, completely exhausted from the panic attack.
The room is silent for a moment, all the guys letting you have a second to gather your bearings.
"What happened?" Changbin steps through the rest of the members, settling next to the three of you on the floor. The rest follow suit, some sitting on your bed and some sitting beside Changbin.
"It's my mom again. I don't even know, I think she like, kicked me out? Like, kicked me out of the family?" You're almost embarrassed to explain the situation. You don't know why, maybe in fear your members will think your mom's right. That maybe you have been missing too many family functions, and that you should’ve made more time for them.
"Y/N, that's awful," hums of agreeance come throughout the room, and Hyunjin's words help to reassure you. "You don't deserve that, not one bit."
"She's completely out of line. Nothing you did warranted this at all," Seungmin chimes in. He knows thoughts of uncertainty are swirling through your head, the gaslighting from your mother turning your thoughts to mush.
"What about Ben?"
"What about him? You know your mom's full of shit, and the minute you show up at her doorstep she'll welcome you in. She's bluffing," Changbin pipes up again, his shoulders tight with anger.
"I don't think she is this time."
~ ~ ~
It's another day, and you've spent it the exact same way you spent the last five- curled up in your bed with the lights off, mindlessly scrolling through your phone.
Chan's come in to check on you periodically, but you’ve been alone for the most part.
The knock at your door alerts you from your sleepy state, and you call them in.
“Hey, I brought you some soup. Minho made it earlier today, and I figured you might be hungry,” Chan says, giving you a timid smile.
“Thanks, Chan, but I’m not really hungry right now. Can you just set it there?” You point to the little table you have at the end of your bed, “I’ll eat it later, I promise.”
Your phone starts to ring, and you gasp when you see who’s calling.
Dad
You pick up immediately, and you’re met with the distant yells of your parents. Confused, you ask, “Hello, Dad?”
“Sissy,” comes through. It’s Ben. His voice is small, and fear seeps through the speaker.
“Buddy, what’s wrong?” You keep your tears at bay, knowing you need to be strong for him. Chan sits down beside you when he hears the little voice you’re talking to, and he rubs your back in comfort.
“Mom and Dad are fighting again,” he sniffles, the microphone personifying every bit of his sadness. “I miss you, Sissy.”
“I miss you, more, buddy, but I don't think we're gonna be able to see each other for a while," you choke back sobs.
“But I miss you so much,” he’s crying harder now, and it’s hard to hold yourself together knowing he’s struggling like he is.
“I know, buddy, I know. I’m so sorry I missed your birthday, I couldn’t get a day off work,” you explain. Chan brings his finger up to your cheek, catching your tear before it’s able to fall from your cheek.
You hear Ben gasp, and your heart beat picks up. “Ben, is everything ok? What happened?”
“Mommy’s coming, and I have to go. She told me I couldn’t talk to you, but I stole Dad’s phone. Love you, sissy,” and he’s gone before you can even say it back.
Chan eventually leaves your side upon your request to be alone for a while. The soup beside your bed grows cold as your sadness overwhelms you once again.
~ ~ ~ "Alright, rise and shine!" you're awoken from your slumber by the bright light shining in from your window. You groan, throwing your pillow over your head to block the light. Your curtains hadn’t been opened in weeks, and you were planning on keeping it that way for as long as possible.
"Nope," the intruder says, ripping the pillow from off your face.
"We've allowed you to wallow in this room long enough. If we're not performing or doing an interview, you're laying in the dark in bed." Your eyes open, crusty and sore from the crying you did before falling asleep the night before.
Hyunjin's face paints your irises, his features full of determination.
"Time to get up." He throws your pillow back on the bed beside you, turning to walk out your door. "Oh, and pack a bag, we're flying somewhere today."
You shoot up in bed at that. "Nothing's on the schedule for today, so where are we going?”
‘Is it something I can get out of?’ is what you really want to say, but you keep it to yourself.
"It’s a surprise. Get up and get dressed, we leave in an hour," he finishes, closing the door behind him.
You slide out of bed, your limbs dragging your covers onto the floor. You don't bother picking them up, too tired to care about the messy appearance of your room.
You quickly get ready, throwing on a comfortable pair of sweatpants and a hoodie. You pull your hair up into a ponytail, attempting to hide the grease that's accumulated over the past few days.
The ride to the airport is quiet and relatively peaceful. Everyone's happy to see you up and moving again, but the facade you've been putting on for the public has been washed away in your tired state, leaving your features drowsy. The dark circles under your eyes are prominent, your cheekbones sticking out more than usual. Your hair’s thinned a little, and your lips are cracked from your lack of hydration.
Through security and the rest of the way through the airport, you grip Jisung's arm, both of you needing the other's support in the overcrowded building.
Chan had explained to you that the managers wanted to start filming for the next SKZ Code a day early, fearing it might take longer than expected.
When you see the television next to your boarding terminal, your eyes practically bug out of your head.
Why would you be filming the next SKZ Code in your hometown?
That's the last place you want to go, your fight with your mom still fresh in your mind. You've been feeling the affects of it, her harsh words and actions sending you deep into a depressive episode.
Your members have noticed, trying their best to pull you from it, but nothing they did seem to work.
They can't begin to sympathize with you, none of them ever experiencing the kind of hurt you feel deep in your heart, wreaking havoc on your sanity. All they can do is offer you words of encouragement and love, assuring you that you still have a family, a very real one. While the nine of you may not be related by blood, the bond between all of you is strong.
They decided to take their efforts one step further, however, after seeing you begin to spiral. Your naps became longer and more frequent, often taking up most of the time you were supposed to be awake. You had been neglecting your self care routine, not even having enough energy to shower and brush your teeth most days.
Chan decided that enough is enough, so he convinced the managers to book you all a flight to your hometown to try and reconcile your family. As much as they wanted your mom out of your life, you were much more sane with her in it, and you needed your dad and your brother.
~ ~ ~
The flight was a success, everything going perfectly smooth.
You're now squished into the backseat of a car on the way to the house you'll all be staying at for the remainder of the filming.
The first thing you notice when pulling up into the driveway is how beautiful the house is. The front yard has the most angelic archways leading up to the house, with flowers lining the sidewalk and little statues spread about.
The house itself is amazing. Tall glass windows cover most of the front, the sunlight easily shining through, lighting up the front room.
The five of you- Hyunjin, Jisung, Felix, I.N, and yourself- make your way into the house, and all of your previous worries disappear at the sight of the incredible interior. The walls are lined with expensive looking art, chandeliers hang from the tall ceilings, and the floors are marbled with white and gray.
Chan, Lee Know, Changbin, and Seungmin went to the store in the other van. They said they needed to pick up some last minute essentials for your stay.
Little did you know, they were actually going to your parents house. Their hopes were to get your mother to forgive you, or at least be civil so you could have a conversation with her.
Unfortunately, their visit did not go as planned, and it ended with your mother threatening to call the cops on them if they didn't leave the property immediately. This, of course, did not deter Lee Know from giving her a piece of his mind. His outburst was in Korean, and the insults he threw at her were so quick she'd never be able to recall them to look them up in a translator.
As much as they wanted to stay, to defend you and help you get your family back, they knew they couldn't. Getting law enforcement involved was the last thing they needed, knowing their managers would immediately regret sending them on this short getaway.
So, with that, they went back to the house with anger embedded in their hearts. They didn't want to have to tell you the real reason you all came here. They didn't know how you would react. Would you be thankful they tried to help? Would you feel betrayed that they'd went to your home without permission? They didn't know, but it was time to face the music; there was no SKZ Code to film, and they had no shopping bags in hand, so the truth was going to have to come out.
"Y/N," Chan sighs as he plops down next to you on the couch. You're both seated in the sunroom, looking out at the lake that sits in the backyard.
He gets your attention, and you slide your phone in your hoodie pocket, turning your body to face him. "What's up?"
He hates that he has to be the one to bring up your family again. You look so peaceful, your face no longer contorted with sorrow and pain like it'd been for weeks now, but he knows he has to tell you. It’s only fair to you. "So, please don't get mad, but this whole thing may or may not have been just a setup for you to see your family again."
Your heart beats out of your chest at the mention of seeing your family again. "Really, when can we go?" Your excitement radiates off of you, and you quickly stand to your feet.
Chan grabs ahold of your sleeve and gently guides you back down next to him, his eyes filled with pity. "Well, when we said we were going shopping earlier, we actually went to your house," he pauses, his eyes scanning your features; your face is blank, the excitement from seconds ago long gone. "Your mom wasn't exactly appreciative of our presence, and she kicked us out. Said she'd call the cops if we didn't leave. I'm so sorry, Y/N."
Your mind whirls with the information Chan just threw at you. "So, all of this," you gesture to your surroundings, "was for me? There's no SKZ Code?"
He shakes his head, his hand coming to rest on your arm, "No SKZ Code."
"And my mom still doesn't want to see me?"
He shakes his head again, slower this time. "I'm so sorry for doing this to you. I thought she'd be more open to talk to you, to us, but she wasn't. If I'd have known it'd end this way, I would've never done all this."
You sit there in silence, your gaze downcast. There's no sadness or anger in your heart, no tears welling up in your eyes. You expelled all the emotions you could over the past few weeks, and you've left yourself with nothing.
You stand, your only desire to go lay down on the plushy bed you found in one of the bedrooms when you were exploring earlier. As you walk away from Chan, he stops you.
"Where are you going?"
"To sleep."
"Are you sure that's a good idea? I can come with you?"
"No thank you, I'll be fine," your voice is robotic as you decline his offer. You make your way to the room, climbing up the stairs to the second floor.
You're out like a light as soon as your head hits the feathery pillow, the day’s events catching up to you all at once.
~ ~ ~
You're rudely awoken by the sound of your phone ringing. You pull it out from your pocket, your eyes squinting at the brightness.
Your eyes widen at the contact name that appears on the screen.
Dad
You quickly press the answer button, scared if you wait too long the opportunity will disappear quicker than it showed up.
Your dad had always been a follower. He's the youngest of four siblings, so it was instinctual for him to do what they did. When he married your mom, he had been the same way. Whatever your mom said went.
Your dad loved you and your brother so much, with all his heart, but when your mom started to act up, he became distant. He was never mean to you; he just stopped calling one day, stopped texting. You knew it was because of your mom; a part of you thought he was scared of her.
The last few times you'd gone home, the tension between them was almost unbearable, but your dad always rolled with it. Essentially, he was your mom's very own punching bag. You felt bad for him, but only he had the power to do something about it. You certainly didn't want to say anything. You were already walking on eggshells with her, the last thing you wanted to do was upset her more.
You bring the phone up to your ear, a shaky 'Hello?' leaving your overly chapped lips.
"Hi, sweetie. It's Dad," his voice is as shaky as yours, and he sounds choked up.
"Dad, what's wrong?"
"I can't do it anymore, Y/N. I cannot listen to her and let her treat you this way anymore."
Your heart breaks for him. All throughout your childhood they had been a happily married couple. The love they had for each other was immense.
"I'm getting a divorce, and I'm taking your brother with me."
Your heart is so conflicted. On one hand, this is the greatest news you've ever heard. You'll get your dad and brother back! On the other hand, you'd never wish divorce on anyone. While this experience would not be exceptionally hard for you, given your nonexistent relationship with your mom and the fact that you don't even live at home, it would certainly be hard for the people you love.
"After your band mates came and tried to talk some sense into your mother, it made me realize how blind I've been these past few years. She’s been so mean and cruel to you, and I just sat by and watched."
You don't know how your little brother will take it. Your mom has spoiled him with everything under the sun. This will surely devastate him.
Your dad, too, this can't be easy for him. You know it's not easy for him from the quiet sobs you hear on the other side of the phone.
You're not sure what to say as he continues to cry. "Dad-"
"Honey, please forgive me," he pleads, his voice cracking. "I've let your mom walk all over us for years now, and I'm so sorry."
"Dad, it's ok. It's not your fault."
He's quiet for a moment. "I have Ben at Grandma's house now. Can you come? He's crying so hard. It wasn't easy to leave, your mom put up a fight and was screaming. I think it scared him a bit."
"Yes, Dad, I will be there as soon as possible. I'm leaving now. Can you send me the address so I can give it to the driver?"
He sends the address and you hang up, promising you'll see him in just a few minutes.
You hurriedly put your shoes on and run down the stairs. All your members are sat in the living room, some video game lighting up the television.
"My dad’s getting a divorce, and he has my brother at my grandma's right now. I have to go see them," you quickly ramble out, looking in your purse to make sure you have everything.
The guys are stunned at your demeanor. They haven't seen you move with such determination in weeks.
"I'm coming with you," Chan says matter-of-factly, standing from the sofa to put his shoes on.
"Chan, you don't have-"
"I want to. I just want to make sure everything's alright," he sighs at the look you give him, your eyes boring into his. "I'll even stay in the car."
You roll your eyes at that, but you don't fight him. You suppose it doesn't really matter if he's there; you just want to see your family again.
~ ~ ~
One short car ride later and you're jumping out of the car, the seatbelt flinging back against the door. Your brother waits for you on the porch, the biggest smile gracing his lips.
You sprint at him, swinging him off his feet and embracing him tightly. "I've missed you sissy!" he cheers, his little arms wound tight around your neck. His tears have dried since your phone call with your dad, leaving little streaks down his cheeks.
"I've missed you more, Bubby," you tell him, thankful to have him in your arms again. Your eyes crinkle as your mouth splits into the biggest smile.
Your dad comes outside upon your arrival and wraps the two of you in a hug, giving you a tight squeeze. His eyes meet Chan's over your shoulder, who decided to step just outside of the car.
'Thank you,' your dad mouths to Chan, giving him a grateful smile.
‘Thank you’ for what? Chan wasn’t exactly sure. Bringing you to him? He’d do it a million times over. Taking care of you? He’d never let you struggle without him by your side.
Chan gives him a thumbs up in reply, just happy to see you happy again.
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xans-mindspace · 4 months
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𝐋𝐎𝐕𝐄 𝐋𝐀𝐍𝐆𝐔𝐀𝐆𝐄𝐒 — ꨄ
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featuring the demon brothers !!! — gn reader — my headcanons !!! — red text in brackets = spoilers , dw it’s very clear what the spoilers are for !!! + it’s only like one minor spoiler — wc. 1.4k
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ꨄ — lucifer : quality time
lucifer loves to spend time with you. this man canonically has separation anxiety mind you !!! he’d send you a random text like “come to the music room” after a long day, or he’d come up to you while you were spending time with the other brothers & tell ask you to go to his room tonight. you rush to his room, expecting to have an important and urgent conversation as he’d made it sound, only to find lucifer sitting on his sofa, a glass of wine in his unusually bare hand and another glass in front of the sofa across from him, as a calming tune plays on the music player.
if you mention the way he had made his request sound so urgent he’d simply say: “what? aren’t i allowed to spend time with my little lamb anymore?” a cheeky smirk plastered on his face.
you would end up talking to him for hours, and the next thing you know, he had somehow convinced you that walking to your room is too much for your little human body to bear this late into the night, so you found yourself warm in the comfort of his bed and his arms as you drifted off to sleep.
ꨄ — mammon : gift giving
what convinced me that mammon’s love language is gift giving is that one devilgram story (mammon at the office) where he worked his ass off to save up for a matching watch for mc ໒꒰ྀི o̴̶̷̤ ︹ o̴̶̷̤ ꒱ྀིა !!! the fact that he didn’t ask money from others like he usually does (apparent from how much debt he canonically has), ‘cuz he actually wants the gift to come from an authentic place !!! it makes it so much more meaningful <///3 and he thinks that the hard work is all worth it if it’s for you !!!
the way the first thing he thinks to do when he receives a batch of money is to take mc out on a date :( he would absolutely spoil you with anything you have your eyes on. you’d be hanging out with him, casually whining about that one thing you really want as you scrolled mindlessly through your phone. the next day, he’ll show up on your door with the exact thing in his hands !!! he def loves surprising u.
ꨄ — leviathan : quality time
levi’s favorite thing is holing up in his room and playing video games. but you rivaled against these, threatening to take their spot on the number one thing that he loves. but why deny himself both?
levi loves it when you come to his room & play games with him for hours. he used to be so used to being alone in his room, mindlessly playing the next video game he had bought. but now, his room would feel so empty without your presence in it.
it’s stupid and cringe, but levi never really cared about that sort of stuff, but you’re his player 2 !!! back then, he’d read summaries of different games. they piqued his interest. he was about to add it in his cart, before he realized it was a game that can only be played by two people. he was left disappointed before deleting the game out of his cart. he basically beamed when he realized that he can play those strictly co-op games he had to drop now that he has you. he immediately jumped to akuzon and bought every single co-op game he wanted to play but was never able to. and adding a few new ones too ! ໒꒰ྀི´ ˘ ` ꒱ྀིა
ꨄ — asmodeus : physical touch
this was a given. we all know that asmo’s love language is physical touch. he just can’t help it !!! whenever he sees you still sleepy in the morning, your hair so messy, he just has to give you headpats !!! it feels like a crime not to !!!
or whenever you two are out together. walking side by side. your hands would touch and i swear to you it would send electrical shocks from the tips of his fingers to his heart. yes, he seems to always have it together, but asmo’s good at performing, right? his heart would thump just from the littlest touches and he can’t help but to intertwine his fingers with yours, holding your hand in his, feeling it click! like a piece of a puzzle connecting. it might be dramatic, but asmo never denied his love for the dramatics, it’s just who he is.
or when you’re acting oh so obliviously and unintentionally cute. how can he not want to give you a tight hug? his feelings are so explosive that he feels like the closest thing that would do his feelings any justice is to let you feel it, literally. physically.
ꨄ — satan : words of affirmation / acts of service
oh satan the man that you are. satan is a textbook gentleman. he has a way with his words. very direct and shameless when it comes to his expression of his love for you. a romantic at heart, at least ever since he’d met you, that is. a romantic at his core, and he can’t think why he would ever hide that from you. it is your fault, after all.
he would flirt openly, and sappily, and he would not bat a single eye ! he’d write you letters, poems. if he were to gift you something, he’ll take the time to stick a sticky note on it, just a cute lil’ message on it ໒꒰ྀི⸝⸝o̴̶̷᷄ ·̭ o̴̶̷̥᷅⸝⸝꒱ྀི১ he’d give u books & when u open it, you’ll see them fully annotated. i’m talking written little stuff on the margins, color coded tabs / highlights & all !!!
ꨄ — beelzebub : acts of service
BEEL OUR SWEET BOY 💔 he will always ask you for what you want whenever he’s out in madame scream’s. he’d get u your favorite snack whenever he’s out in the convenient store.
if you get sick, or you’re having a bad day, he’d show up on your door with aaaall of your favorite food / snacks. he would put it neatly in a basket, and he’d be the person to make you a bowl of soup or even try to bake for you !!! anything to make you feel happy <3
he would absolutely give you amazing massages. beel is a big boy. & i trust he knows kinesiology & thus he’ll know what to do whenever your body is exhausted or isn’t really working with you. he’d be such a huge help, asking you just lay down so he could help you feel better. he’d even put a snack right beside you just in case! you’d feel ten times better after you feel his firm hands massaging your tense muscles. he’d note the way your body relaxes and melts onto his hands. seeing u feel good makes him v happy too. his big & rough hands, handling you so softly and cautiously. just a total teddy bear :(
ꨄ — belphegor : physical touch
people think asmo is clingy? wait ‘til they see how belphie clings to u whenever u two are alone. he will sleep on every part of your body (lol).
once, lucifer had insisted that belphegor actually try to study since finals are coming, and though his grades are not to be undermined, he should still at least study to be safe. belphie agrees, on the condition that you tutor him. so you do. you were studying together. the night was getting darker and you’d been studying for hours on end. you yourself was growing sleepy, so you couldn’t even blame belphie when his head started to sway and bump against your shoulder multiple times, before settling comfortably on it, nuzzling it beforehand.
it doesn’t even need to be a coincidence, he would just directly ask you to be his pillow (verbatim) because it’s the best way to sleep according to him. he would “borrow” your thighs, setting his head so cozily on your lap as if it was as comfortable as a pillow (or even more). or when you hung out with him and beel in their room. you ended up sleeping in his bed, you’ll be vast asleep when you felt something tickling your neck. sleepily opening your eyes, you’d find belphie’s head on your chest. and if you chose to sleep in beel’s bed? oh, he’d climb right up and slither his arms around your waist without saying a word. it was a little cramped, but how could you deny such an adorable gesture? the next day you wake up with his arms still right where it was when you had fallen asleep. his mouth snoring softly as his warm breath fans and tickles the back of your neck.
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a/n: ahhh i finished writing this at 3 am 😭😭😭 it’s storming really hard outside and my eyes are starting to hurt but it was rlly fun to finally write again :-) i hate writing / reading ooc characters so i hope i did your faves justice !!! 😭🙏🏼
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ghosts-bandwagon · 1 year
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Hi friend! I love your writing!! Could you do a headcannon/blurb for Ghost and Price (not poly) with a reader who has trouble opening up emotionally? When they do open up they feel like a burden and feel like they have to “earn back their love” through facts of service? Just angsty fluff :)
Oof I can kinda relate lmaooo
Simon ‘Ghost’ Riley:
He’s pretty closed off at first, and he’s quite aware of it, so he won’t push you or force you into opening up if you’re not ready
You’re both waiting for the other to make a move because you’re too nervous to make the first move yourself, so he steps out of his comfort zone and decides to make the first move
You two are laying in bed, watching videos on your phone when he starts talking about his family. (His timing is a little awkward with these things) His heart is beating so hard and fast in his chest, he feels like he’s about to throw up. You’ve shut off your phone and you’re hanging off of every word, tears prickling your eyes, chewing over his words as you contemplate sharing your own
He bit the bullet and so can you. So you do. You share some of the things that have been weighing in your heart, thoughts that have been plaguing your mind, but before you share too much, you bite your tongue and put a tourniquet on your heart before you overstepped your (imagined) boundaries
He was so relieved you saw fit to open up to him that he drifted to sleep for the first time in ages, and it was a peaceful sleep. Morning came and he was woken up by the smell of coffee and breakfast, he groggily rubbed the sleep out of his eyes and rolled out of bed
“What’s all this?” He asked walking past you and kissing the top of your head as he grabbed the cup of tea you made for him,
“I just wanted to thank you for listening last night, I hope I didn’t burden you.”
“Burden? Love, you’re jokin’” He held the cup close to his lips but set it down as soon as you said that,
“Well, you’ve got your own stuff to deal with and I’m just adding to it and I feel bad.” You said dismissively as you went back to the eggs in the pan,
“Sweetheart, you’re never a burden.”
“I’ve heard that one before.” You chuckled bitterly with a roll of your eyes,
“You callin’ me a liar?” He turned your head to look at him with just a finger under your chin, and those eyes that you loved so much held nothing but the utmost sincerity
“N-no, it’s just,” the words struggled to form, your arguments suddenly moot as they turned over in your head, “I’m sorry.” He leaned in and pressed a kiss to your forehead,
“Don’t be. I’m here for you. Always.”
John Price:
I’ve said it time and time again, John is a patient man. He’s also known Ghost for years, so a bit of emotional closed off-ness isn’t foreign to him. He’s dealt with it, he knows how to handle it. He also knows that leading by example tends to work best in those cases.
He can see that you’ve been bottling something up, he can practically hear you chewing your lip in an attempt to keep whatever it is inside, he hates seeing the torment in your eyes so he takes initiative, he sees that you’re almost at your breaking point so he pulls you away from your task and sits you down in the living room, he’s holding your hands, deft fingers massaging the tension away
He recalls a time when struggled, when he was falling apart at the seams but felt obligated to keep it together for the sake of his men. It ate away at him until it manifested into poor self-care, almost to a point of causing permanent harm to himself. Until he’d met you and you welcomed him and all his troubles with open arms.
You argued that what you were dealing with was nothing like that, it was insignificant by comparison and you went on and on without realizing that he had succeeded in getting you to open up to him. And then you realized it and gradually managed to reel it back in. You dried your tears and happily returned his kiss.
“I’ll always be here listen, alright?” You nodded and kissed him again
He’d stepped out to smoke until he was cut short by the incredible and enticing smell of your cooking brought him back inside. He walked over to you in the kitchen and wrapped his arms around your waist from behind,
“What’s all this about?”
“Just my way of saying thank you.”
“What for?”
“Well for letting me dump all that on you.”
“Sorry?” Despite pulling away slowly, it felt more like recoiling after being punched in the stomach,
“You’ve got a lot on your shoulders already and here I am adding to it. So I’m just making up for that.” You shrugged, he sighed and put his hands over yours, turning you away from your task at the stove,
“Two things love, one, don’t ever feel the need to thank me for listening, two, nothing you ever do could possibly make you a burden to me. Remember that.”
“But-” a lump formed in your throat and he shook his head, taking the utensils from your hand and gently pushing you to the side. He stepped in front of the stove and leaned over to you to place a chaste kiss on your lips.
“No ‘buts’, love. Now, tell me what to do next.”
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niefics · 4 months
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Coffe shop — PSH & FEM!Y/N
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Warnings : Cursing, fluff, smut, Reader is 22, sunghoon is 25, public sex, unprotected sex
Synopsis : F/N L/N started a summer job for extra money during their break at a coffee shop, and falls for their boss Sunghoon.
Word count : 2872, I’m so sorry this took me so long idk
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— A tired groan leaves your body as you hear the noise of your alarm going off. Sitting up and turning it off to see what time it was. You fought going back to sleep, but you knew you had work that day.
You got up, walking into your bathroom and got into the shower trying to wake your tired self up. After getting out the shower you got ready for the day, getting ready in just enough time to get there on time.
“Good morning Y/N.” A deep calm voice said as you opened the door. “Morning, sunghoon.” You spoke to your boss. You were on the hunt for a job for a while especially for summer to save up for things that financial aid wouldn’t be paying for, you walked into the break room and put your stuff away grabbing a clean apron and wrapping it sound your figure. “So what year of collage are you in ?” He asked, trying to make casual conversation. “I’m going into my 3rd year sir.” You spoke. You normally keep your conversations very casual and work related, there’s really not a reason but you just chose to.
“Y/n, can you please set out those baked goods out on the display before the shop opens ? I made a new batch this morning.” He spoke you nodded, walking to the the case taking anything old out and throwing it away, cleaning it and everything. You added the new foods and and started working on making sure the floor was good before opening for the day. “Everything should be ready for the day to start, I’ll go open the door.” You spoke unlocking it, and going to the back of the counter setting up the register, and relaxing for a moment till costumers showed up.
After about 20 minutes, you hear a door open making you look up, you see a mom and her child walk in. “Hi, what can I get you this morning ?” You spoke giving them both a calm smile. “Uhm yes, can I get a hot chocolate, and a ice latte please ?” She spoke, she looked at her child one more time before saying that’s all with her order. “Can I get a cake pop ?” Her child asked. She nodded, and asked for one pink cake pop. You nodded, putting her order in and giving her the total, the price seemed bigger then what it normally was before you told her so you checked everything before realizing that the machine put 2 of everything down when you only did one. “Uhm one second please?” You spoke going to get your boss Sunghoon.
He was in the back on the computer ordering things the shop needed. “Sunghoon sir, the machine is glitching, do you think you could fix it please ?” He looked up at you lifting a brow, “What ? Why would the machine be down.” He spoke getting up and attending to the problem.
“Good morning!” He spoke to the customers before going to help you with the issue you had. “Ahh, I see the problem, Y/n you forgot to clear the amount on the cash register it’s glitching.” He spoke. “Just move to this one and I’ll redo your order okay? And we’ll make that cake pop free, since you had to wait on something we did wrong.” He spoke giving the child a smile. You pressed your lips together in frustration cleaning the cash register, and fixing the glitch.
You went and made their order swiftly and called it. “I’m so sorry for the wait!” You spoke giving them a smile. “No problem.” She gave a reassuring smile and left. Today was a pretty calm and slow day. It was break time, and so you decided to try and make yourself latte, since that’s one of the harder drinks for you. Sunghoon noticed and came over to help you. “I’ve noticed how hard it is for you to make lattes, can I give you some pointers?” He asked you, you nodded, since it was best to learn from your boss.
“Give my your hand, I’ll show you.” He spoke, it was 20 minutes before he had enough of watching you struggle realizing just telling you how wasn’t gonna work. He placed his chest firmly behind you, his calm scent engulfing you, “Watch and listen for me okay ?” He asked looking at you. You nodded shyly as he grabbed your hand and told you how to do things in such a calm tone. “Look at you, you’re doing so much better already y/n.” He spoke, the tone doing something to you. You tried to keep calm but the fact that he was so close made you week in the knees just thinking about it. “Okay, we’re finished.” He moved from behind you, the cool air of the coffee shop hitting you, making you kinda sad he moved. “Now with my help that way you did really well.” He spoke, you smiled about to speak before you heard the door open. “I’ll take these orders.” He spoke standing at the register.
— Closing shift has finally came, it was just you and him there, getting ready to close. You were counting the registers, making sure everything was all good whilst sunghoon mopped the floors and put the chairs up. To let the floor dry.
“So, how was your 2nd year in collage ?” He asked you breaking the silence. “Uhm, it stressful. I’m supposed to not have a roommate this year so I’m excited for the most part.” You spoke. “That’s good, I always wanted to go to collage.” He spoke, I looked up at him. “You’ve never went ?” You asked, and he nodded. “After high school, I started taking care of my friend coffee shop when she got sick, so there was no time for collage for me.” He spoke. You looked up at him, putting your hands down that were full of money onto the counter looking at him. “So.. if you don’t mind me-“ he cut me off quickly and in a calm dry tone spoke. “She passed last year.” His lips were pressed together as he mopped, the dimly litted coffee shop beaming on his face. The room felt a bit sadder now then before I asked. “Oh .. I’m sorry I shouldn’t have..” you spoke feeling extremely sorry for his lost. He stopped mopping putting the mop back in the bucket. “No.. no it’s fine, you can go home early if you like okay?” He spoke giving you a small smile. “You sure .. I mean the back is still a little messy, I don’t mind staying a little-“ he quickly shook his head. “Trust me it’s fine, I can handle it myself. Enjoy your off day tomorrow. I’ll have some new people working soon so please enjoy your day off.” He spoke, you sighed biting you lip finishing counting the money in the register, going back into the break room and changing out of the apron.
You got into you car driving off into the dark night, feeling bad about asking about his friend no knowing she was dead .. or sick enough to die.
Walking into your current living situation with your friend in their spare bedroom in your hometown till you moved back into your dorms. You went to bed tired from the day.
— As your off day went by it felt off, thinking about how close you and your boss where that day. The way he held your hands to guide you stirred something into you. You couldn’t deny how good looking he was, he was always so calm and understanding even when there were quite rude costumers. He had such a charming smile to you, and customers could definitely agree. Teenage girls making their rounds to the coffee shop during early mornings just to hope that he’d be able to make their coffee or give them their breakfast sandwiches.
You couldn’t deny how funny it was either, the way their expressions changed when they saw that he wasn’t there at that moment made you laugh. Snickering every time a disappointed look grew on their face when you popped up from the back to take their orders which was most of the time, you couldn’t deny those things made you day a little bit better.
There were even times where older women hit on him as he took their order, but somehow they always end up surprised that he’s just 26 it never to make you snicker once more.
You spent the majority of your off day sleeping in, and hanging with your friend on her off day too. Having casual conversations but random thoughts about your boss invaded your brain. Wondering how he made himself look so nice and presentable even when he spilt something. Or how soft his hands felt as he helped you with learning how to make lattes, it and much more thoughts .. but before you knew it. It was time to get ready to go to work the next day.
— The sight of new recruits didn’t fail to surprise you. “Oh I totally forgot we were getting recruits.” You spoke walking into the break room. “Yeah, and I need to ask you something too.” He spoke walking over to you giving you two enough space, for it to not be too close. Especially after the other day .. even though you wouldn’t mind it happening again, you softly hummed to him having a question, crossing your arms and resting your back on the entry way of the door. He moved a little he closer not too though, his hands in his apron pockets before speaking. “Can you help train the second trainee, he’s coming later today and I have something really important later.” He spoke, you looked at him your eyes big and dough like .. it was unintentional, but somehow stirred something in Sunghoon. “I’ll make it up to you later okay ? I’ll help you clean up during the closing shift so don’t worry.” He spoke at you in a way that made you feel some way, yes you found him extremely attractive but could this mean something more ? You shook your head yes kind of eager to find out what he would do to make it up later.
“Thank you, I’m sorry this came so sudden but trust me .. I will make this up to you okay?” He spoke moving a bit closer looking you deeply in your eyes making a promise. “Okay.” You spoke looking at him, watching him as he swiftly leaves to the front to help with the first new worker of the day.
You watched as he left, soon after he left the new recruit came as the other left as well. You help the new recruit with things teaching them how to make simple things and the basic training stuff that you learned. Soon the sun had set and as the coffee shop began to get read to close you got a text from Sunghoon. Your phone vibrating in your pocket.
“Send them home early, I’ll help you clean up.” He texted me, you liked the message shortly after telling the recruit to head home early. Watching them leave made you very anxious in a way, especially when you saw a car pull up in front of the door to see Sunghoon getting out. The door opened and closes soon after him locking in since it was well over closing. “Sorry traffic was busy.” He spoke, walking behind the counter stopping just in front of you. “Mm, how was the new recruit?” He asked, you looked at him still a bit nervous. “They were fine, was a fast learner so it wasn’t too stressful.” You spoke, “I already counted all the cash registers so we can just spend most of the closing time mopping and taking care of the back.” You said walking away from him to the back.
He followed for some reason wanting to talk more then usual. “Listen Y/n thank you for the help really.” He spoke, you turned around looking at him, his nice eyes looking at you, a small smile showed from you. “No problem, it’s the most I could do.” You spoke. He sighed glancing at the door leading to the front of the coffee shop before going in for a soft kiss, it was gentle yet passionate, your hands slowly grabbing his face as you kissed back. He pulled back looking down at you, noticing how cute you looked with your sudden surprised looked. Your look didn’t last long, grabbing his face pulling him in for more. His hands moved to your waist but not for long, he soon moved higher almost too your breast as it became deeper, but self control took over for him pulling back from the kiss, nothing but swollen lips and a string of saliva is left.
“I- I’m sorry .. I don’t want to do things like this, let me take you to dinner or something okay ?” You looked at him, your eyebrows scrunched. “Dinner ?” You repeated, hearing a soft hun from him, his eyes on you. “Mhm, we can clean up quickly and..” His sentence ended sooner then expected by another kiss by you. “I don’t think I can wait till after dinner.” You spoke after kissing him, taking his hand and following him to the break room. The change is demeanor definitely shocked sunghoon, you couldn’t deny you were surprised by yourself too.
— Your hands sat on the table as he kissed you deeply. You were sitting on one of the tables in the break room, legs parted due to Sunghoon taking up the space with his body. His hands shifted from the side of your to gently rubbing the inside of your thigh, inching his way closer to your clothes core. Gently rubbing it before quickly unbuttoning your pants. Finally breaking the longing kiss, breath heavy and lips swollen. “Can I ?” He asked looking at you with the purest eyes. You nodded as you tried to catch your breath.
He smirks attractively as he goes in kissing your neck softly, as his hand slid into your jeans rubbing your folds with his cold hands, you tilted your head back softly moaning until his hands moved causing you to softly whine unintentionally. You lifted your head as you looked down to see him pull down your pants and underwear leaving them on your ankles.
The sudden shift of positions surprised you, his slight manhandling of you, mad your arousal more prominent. You were now bent over the table him right behind you. He rubbed your core slowly with his tip causing you to gasp, the feeling of him slowly pushing into you made you want to cry from the pain. Missionary would’ve been the best position at this moment in time but the way he pestered you with soft kisses on you neck and cheek made you hold your pain back and finally he was in. “Are you okay ..?” He ask softly, you nodded giving him the green light to thrust.
The paste quickens at the same time as his hands squeezing your waist causing you to let out pornographic moans. Your pants surprisingly slipped off your ankles and foot causing sunghoon to noticing giving him the opportunity to make the pleasure so much better and his change to go deeper in you. He grabbed your thigh, roughly thrusting into you making his once quiet groans louder and the squelching noises sound more messy as his paste quickens again. “Fuck! Fuck .. you’re clenching like a fucking virgin.” He spoke, the first time you’ve ever heard him curse, you wanted to say something but but nothing came out but moans and pleads to slow down. “Wait- fuck .. slow down s-sung.. hoon.”
“Mm why? You were practically begging to be fucked, ditching my dinner dates to take my dick.” He spoke in a raspy tone, the change in act made you clench harder. “You’re so- so big..” you whined out causing sunghoon to smirk. “Can’t take my dick can you ? Wipe those pretty little tears and take it okay ?” Your vision became blurry as you felt him bully into you, you felt like you were seeing stars and the room was spinning and it felt like it all came to fast, you cried as you tiredly tried to get him to slow down.
Your hand hitting his abdomen, “I’m gonna cum- fuck!” His hand snaked around your waist as he rubbed your clit causing you to squint tightly as you came messily on him. You rode out your high feeling him get sloppy with his thrust soon pulling out, turning you over pulling you back on the table as he thrust back into you again. The fucked out look prominent as he kissed you one last time before quickly pulling out onto your stomach. You rested on your elbows as you tiredly tried to catch your breath, him leaving to grab a random clean towel cleaning you off.
“Let me take you to dinner, especially after all of this.” Dinner still on your mind. “What about cleaning the-“ “let’s worry about it tomorrow.”
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papayatori · 2 months
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Don’t blink! (P1)
LN4 x fém!reader
Warnings: none 🤭
Intro: Y/n, an amateur photographer who was simply skimming through emails, hoping to find some sort of work, accidentally stumbled upon a job offer from the McLaren F1 team. After working closely with the two drivers she had grown up watching and hearing about her entire life,(and almost throwing up on the floor a couple of times), y/n has slowly started to realize that her love for McLaren, and possibly her love for photography, had slowly started to morph into love for a certain driver.
Let’s get to it, shall we?
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Four years have gone by rather quickly since I moved out of my parent’s house on the countryside. I’ve moved onto London to be a part of their photography schools. I’ve been posting my photos since I was able to get a hold of a camera, praying that I might be accepted into one of their schools once I graduated, and I suppose it all paid off.
Funny how life works, huh?
I opened my laptop, hoping to sort through some of these unopened spam emails, possibly even find some sort of job offer somewhere. I took a sip of my coffee and began reading through the unopened heaps of trash.
I skimmed through, barely giving them a second thought before hitting the ‘delete’ button in the side.
“YouTube, Tumblr, McLaren-“
I nearly spat out my coffee. I swallowed deeply, coughing a little on the inhale.
“Sorry, what?” I asked no one in particular.
At first I thought it was an ad of some sort, as I was known for buying McLaren merchandise whenever I had the extra funds. Genuinely, I thought I read the email wrong.
“A job offer..?” A smile made its way to my face, one that held all of my nerves on full display.
Why the hell was McLaren asking me to do a photoshoot of their team?
Here I was, standing in the offices of the McLaren F1 team, waiting for someone to tell me where I needed to go. I took in the shiny white floors, the huge windows overlooking the scenery outside, the McLaren’s in display in the lobby for all to see their beauty.
I was about to throw up all over these pristine, white floors.
Before I spilled my breakfast all over the floor, I was ushered into a room near the middle of the building, one that was large and full of lights and professional equipment that once again made me question the need for an amateur photographer like myself. I looked around the room with my jaw to the floor, seeing stars over just how much fun someone could have with all of these cameras.
I really don’t have much of a life, do I?
“You know, I don’t know how to use any of this stuff, and I’m sure it wouldn’t be hard to figure out, but I figured you’d probably be able to work it better than I could.” I turned to the sound of a somewhat familiar Zak Brown.
My dad, before he retired, worked alongside Zak closely at McLaren Automotive. Ironically enough, I’d never really met the man who ran my favorite F1 team until this very moment. I had heard stories of all sorts of great things happening behind closed doors, got all of the latest McLaren news from my dad, and had never even set foot inside this building before today.
“I think i know just about as much as you do when it comes to all of the fancy equipment.” I said, gesturing to my small camera bag on my hip. “This is about as far as my knowledge goes when it comes to these sorts of things.” Zak smiled.
“Feel free to use it. Your dad used to tell me stories about your ‘photo shoots’ with the family, ‘heard those could get a little crazy.”
I laughed at that, remembering the silly holiday get togethers me, mum, and dad used to have. I remembered the time when I had them both on the porch swing for a photo, and right as I went to take the photo, my dad would blink every time. He had done this so often that I had started to wonder if he was doing it on purpose.
A loud laugh ripped me out of my memories. I realigned my gaze with the two young men that had just entered the room, the first one tripping over the second one’s leg. He locked eyes with me as he fell to the floor, grin fading only slightly as he did so. We stayed locked for a moment that felt like years, just staring into the each other. That’s when I recognized him to be the only person I was nervous about meeting.
I nearly threw up again.
“Nice of you to finally show up.” Zak joked with the two.
Lando looked up in surprise, as if not quite realizing Zak was standing on the other side of the room. Oscar just continued laughing at Lando’s shocked state on the floor. Lando stood up with a sheepish grin that they both sent my way. They acted as if they weren’t famous racing drivers who could have anyone they wanted.
As if they were the nervous ones.
“Hello.” I sent a small wave in their direction, praying Zak would step in and save me.
“Lando, Oscar, this is y/n. She’s going to be doing the shoot today.”
Lando stood up finally, proud and tall, eyeing me like he had to prove himself to me. He sent me a grin, one that would tear my heart to pieces if I saw it too often, and then walked towards me. Oscar seemingly got the memo and followed him along after a short pause to assess the situation. I smiled at Lando as he extended his hand out for me to shake.
“Nice to meet you, darling. I can’t wait to start.” His grin never left his expression as I took his hand.
Had Lando Norris just called me darling?
He squeezed harder than I thought he would, leaving a burn behind where his hand had previously been. The expression on my face must have given me away, the heat rising in my traitorous cheeks would never let me get away with the butterflies from his touch. Not to mention, this bastard knew what he was doing.
Though, I didn’t exactly mind.
I suppose my face had started to turn a darker shade of crimson than I had thought , because Zak sent him a look that I could only recognize as the ‘protective father’ look.
Lando’s only response was a challenging grin.
“Shall we get started, boys?” I asked, hoping to draw attention away from me.
“Where do you want us?” Oscar spoke, giving his hand for me to shake as well. I smiled, thankful things were working in my favor for the moment.
“Follow me.”
For the next three hours, Lando, Oscar, and myself we’re running around the studio and attempting to find some sort of style that worked for the boys. I had gone through the rack of clothing multiple times and had only gotten a few decent pictures of the two in the process. I had started to wonder if we’d ever get any actual progress on the task at hand.
It is exceedingly difficult to focus on the task at hand when you keep making eye contact with Lando Norris.
Lando and Oscar had insisted that we all take a break for a while, which I had spent mostly rummaging through the clothes provided. Lando was lying on the ground in front of the backdrop. I couldn’t help but take a glance every now and then, watching the way his chest moved as he breathed, minding the perfectly placed curl on his forehead. He looked too incredibly peaceful for me to be rummaging around over here instead of taking the given opportunity. I stood up, grabbing my camera and walking slightly over to the side. If Lando was finally at peace, I should be taking advantage of this. I took a few snaps from the side, wandering from different angles and catching him in his state of beautiful tranquility.
The LN4 girlies were absolutely going to love these.
At about the same time I had finished with Lando, Oscar stood up to unzip his leather jacket, saying something to Lando in the process. I smiled.
“Don’t blink.” I mumbled to myself.
I had not only, single handedly taken the perfect photos for McLarens Instagram, but also taken the perfect photos for the fan girls on twitter.
I saw this as a win in my part.
“Alright boys, I think I’ve got what I need.” I triumphantly raised my camera in the air, receiving two incredibly confused looks from the boys.
“I thought we weren’t finished?” Lando looked up at me with an almost saddened expression, standing to come see what I had gathered. I showed them both the photos, casually skipping over the ones of Lando that I had taken last minute. He didn’t need to see those.
“Holy shit, you’re better at this than Zak described.” Lando gave me a goofy grin that made me blush.
“I can’t take all the credit. You both helped me out in the end, I thought I was finished!” We all laughed a bit, feeling the tension ease as we came to a close.
“Well, if we’re done here, I’ve got a date tonight with my girlfriend, I’ll see you all later?” Oscar said, pulling his jacket back over his shoulders. I smiled.
“It was nice meeting you! Have fun.” He smiled back, sending a wave to the both of us. As he walked out of the room, Lando’s attention was redirected back at my camera. He plucked it out of my hands, skimming through the photos on his own.
“You know, for someone who knows so much about us, I don’t even know your name.” He gave me a sideways glance, insisting I speak.
“My name is y/n.” I said with a smirk. “And I don’t know all that much about either of you, I’m only here for the job” I heard him chuckle from beside me.
“Even so, you know a lot about how to take pictures of someone without them realizing it” he smirked, shoving the camera back in my direction, revealing the breathtaking photos I took of him on the floor earlier.
I really didn’t think this part through.
“I mean, I had to use an opportunity when it came to me. Twitter is going to love those.” I tried to play it off as if I had taken these with the intention of work rather than just attempting to capture his beauty.
“I’m sure you know loads about that.” He winked at me.
With a groan, I attempted to snatch the camera back, though his hold held firm. I gave him an annoyed look, even though I was slightly amused.
“You’re only proving my point further, darling.” I tried pulling the camera again, hoping to have better luck this time. I mentally cursed his stupidly attractive hands.
Accepting defeat, I let out a sigh.
“What do I have to do to get that camera back from you, Lando.” I rolled my eyes, crossing my arms slightly. He tilted his head as if to show he was thinking. His lashes fluttered as he blinked, revealing his beautiful green eyes, the ones any girl could find themselves lost in in a matter of moments. I felt the butterflies settling in my stomach as he finally replied, pulling me from my daydreaming.
“I think it’s a little unfair that Oscar is going on a date tonight and I’m not. So, let me take you to dinner. Then you can have your camera back.”
I blinked a few times, clearly confused.
“Im sorry, tonight?” I asked, starstruck.
“Well, I was thinking so, yeah. Unless you don’t really want your camera back.” Lando smirked a little in my direction.
My mind was racing, why was he asking me to dinner? All he had to do was hand me the camera back. Everything would have been settled then, and I wouldn’t have to see that breathtaking smile in person ever again. I wouldn’t have to look into his eyes or feel the butterflies that he somehow caused me to have. Hell, I’d just met the guy.
Oddly enough, I was about to go on a date with him.
“Alright, but I want my camera back.” I went to pull it from his grasp one more time, expecting to have it back in the safety of my pack.
“After the date.”
My jaw dropped to the floor. Was I hearing him right?
“Okay, after the date.” I agreed, only to see him take the bag from my side, place the camera in it, and place the bag on his shoulder. I rolled my eyes, opening my mouth again. “I have my own terms, however.”
He gave me a playful glare. “I didn’t agree to that, ma’am.” I chuckled, my hands finding my hips.
“It wasn’t a suggestion sir.” I mocked him with a playful grin. “You buy, I’m still in school. I think it’s a fair offer.” Shaking his head and trying to conceal his grin, he extended his hand.
“Deal.”
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tokioangelic · 6 months
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⋆.ೃ࿔*:・ Let me do your nails Bill Kaulitz x Fem Reader
this is a repost from my one shots book on my wattpad (perrinekaulitz)
content: Reader is on her period so her literal angel of a boyfriend takes care of her and paints her nails to distract her <3
You groaned in discomfort, hands clutching your stomach as your cramps tortured you, your muscles clenching so hard you felt like you were about to collapse. Your body slumped, holding onto the Kitchen counter for stabilization. You absolutely hated your period, more than anything, and Your cramps were worse than usual. You groaned in annoyance, serving yourself to a cold glass of water that you gulped down. You felt two arms wrap around you, your boyfriend pulling you against his warm frame as he towered over you. "Are you okay Love?" Bill asked, his voice soft and concerned. "Those cramps ruining your life as you know it?" You nodded, groaning in discomfort. 
Bill smiled sympathetically, placing a kiss to your neck as he hugged you closer. "Why don't you go get comfortable on the Sofa, I'll bring you everything you need!" Bill steered you out of the kitchen by your shoulders, sitting you down on the Sofa, plumping the cushions and making sure you were comfortable. "I'll be right back!" he assured you, kissing your forehead before he disappeared out of the room. You smiled to yourself, feeling all warm and fuzzy inside. You were so happy to have a boyfriend who was so caring and loving. 
Bill came back into the room with one of his hoodies, a thick fluffy blanket, and your little bag you kept all your nail stuff in. He set all the things down on the sofa, helping you into his hoodie and covering you in the blanket as you smiled gratefully at him. He disappeared back into the Kitchen, coming out with a Cup/Mug of your favourite drink and a bunch of snacks for you both to share, setting them down on the coffee table and handing you your drink. "Thank you Bill!" You exclaimed, cupping the drink in your hands as you lifted it to your lips to take a sip. 
He turned on the TV and put on your favourite Show, making himself comfortable on the Sofa beside you as he set a Pillow on his lap, opening your bag of Nail stuff, pulling out a few bottles of different coloured Polishes for you to choose from. You pointed at your favourite Colour, taking a sip of your drink. "Nice choice!" Bill smiled, taking your right hand and placing it on the Pillow on his lap, setting to work. 
You watched him, eyes lingering on his beautiful face as he painted your nails with care, occasionally lifting your hand to his lips to blow softly on the drying nail polish, adding a protective top coat. He looked so majestic when he was focused. Once he was finished, he held up your hand to show you. "Do you like them?" he smiled. You nodded eagerly. "Of course!" You assured him, finishing your drink and putting it down, handing him your other hand to work on. You smiled to yourself, watching him instead of the show playing on the TV. 
Bill finished your nails, making sure to blow on them and double check if they were dry. "Beautiful!" he declared, kissing both your hands as he shuffled closer to you on the Sofa, making himself comfortable behind you as he pulled you against him, cuddling you close to his body. You relaxed into him, feeling the comforting warmth of his body against yours. 
You didn't realize, but Bill had made you forget all about your cramps. 
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posebean · 7 months
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fantasys your alkaloid‼️ ‼️ ‼️ ‼️ ‼️ ‼️ ‼️  ref sheet of alkaloid for my alkakurei fantasy au that i totally didnt abandon crazy:B here (notes abt world+magic system and other stuff on that post)
stuff abt their outfits and etc under read more
hiiro is fresh from his village baby boy left to go find his nii-san with only his clothes and a trusty satchel at his side- he just goes around looking for his nii-san and etcetc idk how long the gap is but he finds tatsumi and mayo and stays with them for some time and during that time tatsun gets him a coat because baby boy literally only has those and hes just been doing work for some guild (idk how to explain bc guilds require education but i guess tatsun pulled strings for him) so he has money to live while also looking for his nii-san and sometimes he has to go to cold places and one time he comes home after a job in a cold place and hes sick and tatsun is like hiiro-san please take this jacket with you :..) so now hiiro has a coat custom-made for him :3! he's good with elemental magic (the 5 core elements water wind fire earth plant) very versatile and a skilled little guy (not as talented as his nii-san but no one is as talented as nii-san!) anyways yadda yadda he gets a message or smth and is preparing to leave tatsun and mayo but (spoilers for meru fic) meru points him towards the town where everyone else is and yea he goes and finds his nii-san and now his goal has changed from find nii-san to convince nii-san to go back home but he befriends everyone else too and i think they do eventually go on some kind of adventure together maybe more the three younger ppl aira hiiro and kohaku
aira is a little silly fellow he dresses nicely (very inspired by fs2 but i cant stop looking at it and thinking damn he french colored......) and loves magic so much he admires all the grand mages and everyone in the upper echelons and loves watching other people cast spells and such unfortunately for him while he has a decently high innate talent, his control is God Awful which results in magic never going well for him- with no control at all, literally negative control, he can try to cast one spell and something completely different will be cast instead- and the skill level varies too it's literally just a roll of a dice for him if he tries to cast a simple flame spell he might end up flooding the room with a wall of water, it's that bad kkshfkj also he acts like he doesn't like it but he actually loves rabuhan-junior so much he secretly spoils the hamster named after him and rabuhan junior loves him back rabuhan-junior likes to sleep in his hat or on aira's head whenever kohaku goes out and leaves rabu-han junior with aira tatsun has very normal clothes bro dresses like a dad (did you know both of his fs have the same color palettes i didnt but using them as reference made me realize, anyways-) his clothes are very comfortable and easy to move around in, especially given his injury from [spoiler event here ]. he also has a cane and his injured leg has pain suppressor sigils and bandages wrapped all over it his leg isn't completely unusable like its not broken or anything its more like. a kind of necrosis like if you unwrapped it there would be a dark mark thats like icky and sometimes it flares up and hurts tatsun so much that he falls over and :( he found the cane one day in the catacomb (wonder who put it there) he added the begonia himself as a reminder of his sin... shiro is his little mouse familiar that he conjured with the help of kaname! she's a sweet little thing, often found sleeping on an open book on tatsumi's desk. she has the tatsumi-colored ears and legs because she was conjured up rather than a pact familiar. regarding magic tatsun is pretty average on both control and power, but that doesnt really matter because most of the spells he uses are passive spells more used for healing/doing work. he likes to garden and has a beautiful garden of all kinds of flowers at the chapel :) he just doesn't dare touch the flowers in the catacomb, because he knows someone else already takes care of those also that purple gem hanging around his neck is a gift from mayomayo it doesn't do anything and has no magic but tatsun still likes it :) mayomayo dresses in all dark colors because he believes that if he always dresses in dark colors no one will ever have to be bothered by seeing his existence he comes from a lineage that practices forbidden magic, not necessarily all dark but some of the more ... interesting spells . something happens in his past and he ends up leaving, taking with him his tome and well. proceeding to get chased by all kinds of monsters out in the wild because for some reason he just attracts all kinds of beasts poor guy magic-wise he does have the forbidden magic from his family but he more specializes in healing and curse removal- he doesn't dare do anything else for fear of (redacted). besides, maybe he'll one day be able to actually save somebody instead of hurting them, maybe his existence would be worth it some day. the ribbon in his hair (the green/teal one) is from tatsun :) he said mayo would look good in brighter colors and mayo disagreed so tatsun gave it to him and now its become part of his outfit and (i combust into a thousand bits ) also because of that mayo feels like he has to give tatsun something back so thats why he gives tatsumi a purple gem he had that used to hang from his spell tome anyways i still love this au very much and i hope you enjoyed now i will proceed to forget about it again /j i still really wanna write kohaku's fic and then maybe one last one for rinne-kun or smth because aghghj there's still so much that's not developed yet but (explodes)
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dollsahoy · 4 months
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I'm setting up a shop! It's the same shop host ShiftyThrifting uses, so it allows for both print-on-demand items and physical items. Right now, I have the above available as 3"/76mm kiss-cut stickers, and I'm working on listings for a lot of clothes I made for me but decided I would never wear. I'll get doll clothes up there, too, eventually, and I have a few ideas for more illustrations and word art things.
I'm not sure if I'll ever have an idea that people would want on any other products, like shirts or any of the other print-on-demand items FourthWall offers, but the option is there.
I know it's an odd time to launch this, but I had to roll with it as soon as I could or else I know I'd procrastinate it until everything was ~just right~ (I've actually spent a few days adding clothes, and only just realized I can hide those until they're all ready and start getting the word out on the stickers, which is probably what most people will be interested in anyway)
I will make more posts whenever anything is added, whether it's stuff I made or designs for print on demand things, and the promo images for those shouldn't be as cluttered as this one😅
(I have not received my sample prints yet, but it is the same printer for ShiftyThrifting's stickers, so I trust it)
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thenextdawn-backup · 1 year
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Jealousy
Word count: 1.3K
Summary: request here
Warnings: slight angst
Pairing: Wednesday X Fem!Reader
Writing this when I’m shadow banned. Motivation’s a bit low, but I hope you still like this 🖤✨
———
You never really knew when you became friends with Wednesday. Yes, Wednesday Addams, the girl everyone was kinda scared of and that would barely talk with no one. But somehow at some point you two had ended up talking over some common interests, like the topic of death, gore stuff and all like that. It felt weird to her, finally having someone with the same humor and with the same interests as her, but she was comfortable whenever she was around you. That feeling of comfort soon transformed into something stronger, at least from you. It was clear to everyone, maybe even to Wednesday, that you didn’t know. All you knew was that you liked her so much.
Recently you had been helping her even with the monster investigation. You would help each other with connecting the dots, figuring out its attack pattern and why it was doing it and if his victims were planned or not, but nothing really seemed to make sense in the beginning. However if you thought things were being easy, there was someone that didn’t see it like you did. Xavier Thorpe. Ever since Wednesday showed up at Nevermore he had never left the ravenette alone - or at least he tried to - he just was so interested in her and he didn’t want to let go even if it was pretty clear that the shorter girl wanted nothing to do with him.
Each time he’d go ask her to spend time with him, she always replied with “I can’t I have plans with (Y/N)” , “Me and (Y/N) are going out looking for clues” and stuff like this. Fun fact was, none of this was an excuse. I mean it partly was, but it was true. She always had something planned with you, always. Hell you even invited her to go to the Rave’n with you! However all of this made the boy really nervous and jealous, to the point where he’d start mocking you in class, or animated his drawing of insects which he knew you were scared of, but you knew it were just drawings, so you never really minded that. He was showing how ridiculous he was.
“(Y/N) for one evening could you please not make plans with Wednesday? I would really like to hang out with her. Alone, that is.” He specified, which made the hair in the back of your neck stand up. “I’m sorry Xavier but we both have priorities. And you’re not one of them” he scoffed and crossed his arms “you do realize that she’s only using you right?” He said, you knew this was a lousy attempt to make you angry. “Yeah well, she might be using me but at least she wants to spend time with me outside that, too” you said, knowing he wasn’t getting even that. You hoped he’d leave you alone after this but of course he wouldn’t. “Yours it’s a one sided relationship and you’ll see that soon.” He kept on adding to it. “Even if it is? Why do you care? You’re just jealous she likes spending time with me instead of you.” You finished your speech.
There weren’t many people there in the quad, but the ones that were there turned to look at you two. “Friends you say? Yeah well tell her how you feel about her and let’s see how good of friends you’ll be then!” He snapped. Amongst those few people was Wednesday too. You stayed quiet at what he had just yelled, and when you turned around you saw everyone looking at you, including the ravenette girl you were just talking about. You didn’t know what to say, you didn’t know if to tell her how you felt as you looked at her and she did the same, looking at you with what could be described as surprise.
You were too panicked to tell her what you felt right now, you had to walk away. “Fuck you” you told Xavier as you left the school. “You’re pathetic!” He said but you ignored him and left, going towards the woods. “(Y/N), wait-“ you heard what you thought was Wednesday protest behind you, but you were blinded by rage and only proceeded to storm towards the woods. You had been keeping feelings in for so many times, too scared to tell her everything and now Xavier had to come and ruin it all for you just because he was jealous? He even called you pathetic!
You weren’t going to stand down and let him call you pathetic, you just weren’t going to. You needed to show him and everyone else that you weren’t as pathetic as he said. How were you going to do it though? The only way was to catch the hide and fight him. You could outpower him after all, and no one knew about that. Your telekinesis was so strong to make someone’s brain explode, even if you always limited it. How were you going to find him though? You just had to wait and see if he came out at some point.
You stayed hours in the woods but when night came, you started hearing growling. Of course he’d mostly attack at night, because no one can actually “see” him or well, who it was. You and Wednesday had found out it was human, and you just wanted to defeat him and find the person. Soon enough the monster approached you and just as he was about to hurt you, you shot him away with your telekinesis “you’re not gonna hurt me you bastard” you sent him against a tree. You didn’t though realize that when you used too much of your power, it would drain you of all your energies..
The monster wasn’t getting tired, he was just getting angrier and you were getting weaker, he started getting you a few good hits, but never damaging you too much. At one point you got so angry that you smashed him repeatedly against the floor until he ran away. After that you collapsed on the ground and before you could pass out Wednesday caught you. She had arrived just in time, she saw you smash him repeatedly and she caught you before you could hit your head. You had passed out in her arms and she and her friends took you to the infirmary.
When you woke up jolting, you slowly took awareness of your surroundings and saw Wednesday. You relaxed a bit and laid back down, massaging your temples for the terrible headache. “You were brave there, in the woods.” She started as she looked at you. Her eyes conveyed emotions and you were sure of that, but you couldn’t decipher what emotions. “Thanks, I guess. I was just trying to prove you that I’m not as pathetic as Xavier said.” You said, and taking advantage of the room being empty, Wednesday moved closer to you. “You didn’t have to, (Y/N)” she reassured you, taking your hand. “I’m not sure why, but I like you. Your presence is enough, you don’t need to prove me anything” she said, surprisingly smiling at you.
Her smile, god she looked gorgeous. You had never seen the girl smile before today and she looked so pretty. You squeezed her hand and slightly pulled her in closer. You saw her hesitate before leaning in and placing a soft kiss on your lips. You reciprocated and caressed her cheek. “Not a word to anyone about this” she said as she lightly pulled back from you. Her sentence made you laugh at her words, before nodding and pulling her in for another kiss.
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cod-dump · 1 year
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Alright, so I saw that someone wanted more food insecurity with Ghost, but idk if this counts as food insecurity—it's whatever. It includes food, so it counts. ┐( ̄ヮ ̄)┌
New Prompt: Ghost has trouble telling when he's hungry until he's literally starving and has really bad time blindness while on leave (like me).
On top of his shit childhood, Simon's teenage years brought on a whole lot of issues with appetite. Despite being a growing boy, Simon has a very unique appetite due to his previous eating habits mentioned in the other ask. He kinda fucked up his hunger levels. He would eat whatever whenever, but he was never actually hungry or at least—he couldn't really tell. This caused problems when he would unknowingly go the whole day without eating something because he couldn't find any scraps to snack on, and couldn't tell that he had been starving until his stomach loudly expressed its anger at him the next morning.
He never really acknowledged it as a serious problem. The military already gave him a set schedule and timeframe on when to eat, so it was never an issue of missing meals and accidentally starving himself.
Until he went on leave for 3 months with Johnny.
There was no longer a set schedule on when to eat since Ghost was sleeping in most of the time like the grumpy black cat that he is. So, sometimes, when Johnny's out in the morning doing whatever and Ghost wakes up, he doesn't eat—like at all. He turns on the TV and absentmindedly watches some random documentary about penguins while mindlessly cleaning around the house and—oh shit, Johnny's home. What time is it?
Why is Johnny already back home? He's supposed to be back by 7pm and it's only—Ghost briefly checked the time on his phone—7:20pm... How the hell...
That was when Ghost suddenly realized that his stomach had literally screaming at him for probably hours. He forgot to eat. He hadn't eaten since he woke up 8 hours ago. He woke up at 11, and it's already night time!
Johnny had a very disappointed expression when he found out that Ghost had done things around the house like clean up and fold clothes and shower, but didn't eat a single thing. Johnny expected Ghost to find leftovers in the fridge like he would back on base, but apparently his LT forgot to look at a clock in between his activities. He was disappointed, but he also had a pretty bad case of time blindness when he was super involved in something, so he couldn't really blame the man. They both learned something new and that info was tucked away for later.
Instead, the two went to the kitchen and Johnny made three of his signature, god-tier-level sandwiches; two for Simon, one for Johnny. It was something quick to make, and they always tasted good. It hit just the perfect spot for someone who hasn't eaten in 8 hours in favor of being productive in an empty household.
From that point forward, Johnny added to his ever-growing list of things about his Ghost. Make sure to remind Simon to eat every 3-4 hours or he will forget (specifically on leave). Simon learned to look forward to Johnny's messages telling him to grab something to munch on everyday.
(i wonder what those text reminders would look like ngl, also someone make up the type of sandwiches that Soap makes bc that man knows how to make a mean sandwich)
— 🍄🍂
Ghost is me fr. Time blindness and all
___
Message from Johnny: Hey babe! Go eat the lunch I made for you and some water! Be home later ❤️
Message from Johnny: I need you to go stuff your face with some food and send me a picture of your best chipmunk impression! That’s an order, soldier!
Message from Johnny: If that can of crisps that I bought you isn’t empty by the time I get home there will be no Sherlock marathon or cuddles!! I MEAN IT
Message from Johnny: I counted the water bottles before I left this morning. I will know if you didn’t drink one of them.
Message from Johnny: Simon my love, it’s been two hours since I left this morning. There’s a sandwich waiting for you in the fridge with a can of soda. Make sure to eat it ❤️❤️
Message from Johnny: if you didn’t eat the stew i made for you i will cry and there will be no kisses or cuddles!! 🥺🥺
Message from Johnny: *picture of a hotdog* I showed you my dog so be polite and show me yours
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cowboymantis · 2 months
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I am having so so so many feelings about Infinite Wealth and I've just been spamming my friend with essays about my overanalyzing brain that obsesses over every single detail in media I am obsessed with,, BUT THIS GAME IS JUST SO FULL OF OPPORTUNITIES FOR IT AAAAA!!!
I just wanna note some longer thoughts down, because I need somewhere to collect some of them,,,,
So yeah, uh, obviously:
LIKE A DRAGON INFINITE WEALTH SPOILERS
(any Yakuza game really, but this is the most recent one, so more likely that people haven't played that yet)
Number 1:
So first of all, Kiryu's parts are, because of the bucket list stuff, very focused on the past. He's trying to tie up loose ends, in his own way and how much he is actually able to do with the Daidoji restrictions.
So I think it was really fitting that he was the one fighting Ebina. In a way it felt like him fighting his past and trying to turn it around.
Now what do I mean by that? Let's start from an earlier point.
Basically, the game is a bit like a mirror to Kiwami in some ways.
Lani is like Haruka, hunted down by several groups of people and they even talk about this similarity being Kiryu's leading factor of motivation in helping her. I mean, there's also different mafias and a whole government conspiracy. But I mean, nothing new in a Yakuza game, but just one more thing added on top of it all.
Where it really starts to show and made me think "Ohhh...wait a second" is when Ebina held his speech about his past. Ebina and Ichiban, even though they didn't grow up together like them, are so similar to Kiryu and Nishiki. One being the Yakuza boss Arakawa's "favourite child", who also idolizes him, and the other one grows to hate him.
And I think this is also the moment where Kiryu realizes "Oh no...history is repeating itself again, isn't it..."
So at the end of the fight, when he actually breaks out in tears and begs for no one to die, it feels like all those deaths he couldn't prevent over all those years, good or bad people, just make him completely break down and he just wants this endless cycle to finally end.
Before the game came out, RGG and actors, in some occasions pointed out how this was a happier game. It makes you feel like looking up instead of being sad.
And while I was playing, I often just felt "Bruh, they lied to us. This game is so sad???", but after I then finished the game, I just sat there and felt such a big relief, the ending just was honestly perfect (well, I mean the cliff hanger was awful jddhd). But then later, it also made me think yeah, this is kind of like a positive version of Kiwami, isn't it? It just feels like it's in a way Kiryu's tying up loose ends with Kiwami's happenings. Fighting his past, finally getting over it in a way.
I thought more about this when I listened to Ebinas boss theme again, because one part has those bells(?) And they sound so much like in For Whose Sake. And then I thought back to the ending more and realized that the whole buildup of it was so much like Kiwami too!
In the finale, first you fight [Villain], who is also the main culprit behind a big government conspiracy. He has helpers with him, and attacks with a gun/guns.
At first you only fight the helpers, then him together with those helpers.
The music is intense and dreadful, everything feels really epic.
Then, after that fight, it goes to the REAL final boss fight. Inside a room, high up on the Millennium Tower, you fight him. Both Nishiki and Ebina are so similar already in their own ways. And the fight is more personal, with emotion behind it. Just that it ends with Nishiki killing himself, but Ebina, while he basically begs for Kiryu to kill him, survives.
The music during the fight has it's ups and downs (intensity-wise) and manages to feel both melancholic and relaxing, as much as they hype you up.
So yeah, it's all such a direct mirror up to the point how it ends. And Kiryu was trying his hardest to prevent things from happening again.
There are often similar themes and plots throughout Yakuza, makes sense, such a long running series, but I think in this particular case it's just so very fitting and it's just SO similar and fits the reflection and fix-it theme of Kiryu's part of the story so well. Especially with how Kiryu's tragic story all started with Yakuza 1 (going by release), still haunting him through every game with constant flashbacks, and now it ends with a story so similar.
Or well, let's hope so, I just want Kiryu to finally rest bruh 😭😭
Number 2:
"Rupture". The name of Hanawa's theme in Gaiden.
Just blatantly taking dictionary definitions here, but there are two ways the word "Rupture" works:
1) (especially of a pipe or container, or bodily part such as an organ or membrane) break or burst suddenly.
"If the main artery ruptures, he could die"
2) breach or disturb (a harmonious feeling or situation).
"Once trust and confidence have been ruptured, it can be difficult to regain"
Keeping that in mind, moving on.
Maybe listen to Hanawa's battle theme for this one, to really visualize it.
Now, whenever I put on the good ol' Gaiden All Boss Battle Themes video, whenever Hanawa's theme came on, I thought wow, this song is really completely different, huh.
But the nature of the song felt quite fitting for a character like Hanawa.
It starts of dark, mysterious, there's a sadness to it. Just like Kiryu now, he has been a man who once "died" and has since then been forced to live in the shadows, his every move being controlled by others. He's like a bird trapped inside a cage.
Then, the song picks up, becomes more intense.
Hanawa's internal struggle and his fight with Kiryu.
When you fight him, the whole scene around it honestly, is like the bird trying to escape this cage. And while nothing that happened was really "real", as in, no fatalaties would've happened because it was all a test, it did feel real for Hanawa and Kiryu. Now looking at the second definition for rupture, it's just like here, on a way more emotional level. And all so sudden. And this is the beginning of him being more and more risky when it comes to the Daidoji, and he keeps on helping Kiryu more than he should, its like his rebellion.
In Infinite Wealth, during the raid on the safe house, it was also all so sudden. It all happened so fast.
The music is picking up. It's nearing the end of the song, and everything becomes so loud and overwhelming - Hanawa suddenly gets shot and dies - then immediately after the wild and short final buildup, silence again. It's a slow, quiet somber tune, like at the beginning of the song, but now fading out... And Hanawa is declared dead.
The sudden rupture lead to immediate casualty, physical this time.
I'm sorry, I DON'T KNOW WHY I MAKE MYSELF SO MUCH SADDER OVER THIS SCENE. But come on, it's just... so perfect, right? 😭😭😭😭
I miss Hanawa so much man. I was really pissed that this is the way they let him go, but just now, after listening to his theme again for the first time since I even started Infinite Wealth, it felt like it just all made sense now. It just clicked. His theme is like a visualisation of his whole story throughout the games.
And it's honestly, sadly perfect. The composers for the Yakuza games are honestly such geniuses. Bringing out some of the best songs ever constantly and making them just feel so fitting for everything.
But yeah. Regardless of if this was meant to be interpreted similiary or not, it just kind of adds to it all for me personally. Especially since you could now maybe see his theme in Gaiden as a bit of secret foreshadowing?
I'd like to see it that way. And maybe, seeing a bit more importance in it all is what helps me to cope with his godawful death scene, RGG what were you thinking man 🥲🥲🥲
Number 3:
Eiji.
Oh boy. Uh, I don't really know yet what the general opinion on this pathetic wet cat (affectionate) is, but I really loved this character. In both a "you're such a damn loser" and "my poor little meow meow :(" way :'D
But most importantly, what I wanna focus on to follow the (over)analyzing theme: Eiji is like a mirror of Masato.
Now, Kiryu has his Kiwami mirror in his finale and Ichiban also has one. But I think this one is way more obvious and also very ironic.
Eiji starts off with trying to earn Ichibans trust and well- it immediately works, of course, it's Ichiban! But the tactic he uses for it, faking being disabled and needing a wheelchair. It was the perfect way to make Ichiban pay attention to him first, because it would remind him of Masato. I think Ichiban immediately just started to get attached to Eiji, and now I'm thinking that Eiji was probably a bit conflicted before he turned his back on him. But his deep rooted hatred was too strong for one nice interaction with a Yakuza, something he demonized, to stop him.
I think it was kind of funny how he was basically like "You're so evil, you Yakuza will NEVER be good people!!! See how good I am while I throw down this child tied to a wheelchair, down those stairs while holding a bomb!!! That'll sure show you evil Yakuza!!!"
Ah. He's so stupid 😭
And yet, whatever happened, Ichiban just constantly called him "Ei-chan", like he's still his bestie and everything is fine. Constantly protesting against it, Eiji probably felt more and more conflicted, because Ichiban is just such a big (and naive) sweetheart. (((Side note: What's not to love about him fr 😭😭)))
So by the finale, and after Eiji had time to say how much he HATED the Yakuza and also, y'know. The whole Bleach Japan thing. Kinda like someone else, hm? Someone else Ichiban constantly insisted on treating like a friend.
But Ichiban convinced him to just turn himself him, turn his life around. Just like he eventually managed to convinced Masato through blood and tears.
And the ending scene is literally an exact mirror to Yakuza 7. Ichiban carrying someone away...
Just in Yakuza 7, it is Masato, dying in his arms, and in Infinite Wealth, it is Eiji, and he's trying his hardest so he will get out of this completely unharmed, throwing himself in front of every danger facing them, getting beat up until he passes out by the end.
You could say this too, is like a good version of another game's ending, with a character mirroring a brother-like person to the main character.
Quite ironic how Eiji started off "imitating" Masato, only to end up like him. Just that one died and one lived.
And just like Kiryu did with Ebina, Ichiban tried his hardest to stop history from repeating itself. Stop more people dying again and again.
The logo having an Infinity symbol seems oddly fitting now, you could say each circle of the symbol is Kiryu and Ichiban, and their stories are intervined in certain ways. Just that their stopped the "infinite" circle from repeating once again.
Or...something like that. I'm trying to sound smart at 5 am, I need sleep I think 😭
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twig-tea · 12 days
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Hi!
So Cherry Magic Thailand was amazing. Which really surprised me. I still have reservations about the next jbl adaptations by Thailand, but I guess we'll see. Anyway, because of that I have been thinking about this.
Which existing series do you think could benefit from an adaptation by a different country? That could maybe give the story a different perspective or simply because they would have different resources? Thanks
Rose💜
Thank you so much for this ask, Rose, and apologies for being so slow to answer!
The first obvious answer to this is anything from the censored era of Chinese BL being picked up by a different country. We're already seeing the benefits of that in Taiwan's adaptation of DaGe in Unknown the series, which from what I've been told is not only going to allow some intense kisses (possibly, if the actors aren't trolling us, more explicit sex scenes than are actually in the original Priest novel, though I'm not going to assume we're getting anything until I see it), but also with changes like a reduction in the homophobia of characters. Recently they announced SaYe/Chasing the Light was optioned for a film version outside of mainland China, so I'm now hopeful some of the stuff that was shelved is going to get made after all, and maybe with less censorship. That being said, a whole list of just censored dramas that were based on BL novels would be boring. So instead I'm considering what shows did I like but wanted to see done again in a different way, and which country would handle the themes and style of the original in a way that would be fun to watch?
I'm thinking about Love Stage!!! Which was a Japanese manga adaptation with a version from both Japan and Thailand, and My Dead Gangster Oppa which was adapted from a Korean webtoon, and Why R U Korea adapted from the Thai show, and how the productions in the different countries would change what we get. So, I'll be basing my answer on those as well as CMT you referenced.
[Sidenote: originally I was going to say Thailand should adapt Man Who Defies the World of BL except with Series-Y tropes and then realized that's exactly what Why R U was supposed to be in the first place--it would be neat to see a Korean version of this storyline with webtoon tropes (we kind of got that with Our Dating Sim but they went with dating game tropes instead). ANYWAY that's not really an adaptation so I'm not including it below, but putting it into the universe.]
Enough waffling, let's go!
Twig's Foreign Adaptation Wish List
Taiwanese adaptation of 2gether
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Hear me out. If we're going to see this story again, I want better reasons for needing to fake date and better chemistry once they're actually dating, and I can imagine Taiwan adding in the angst and chemistry to make this show work through to the end. Taiwan would also have no problem keeping Sarawat's obsession with Tine's pecs in the storyline (critical inclusion, imho), and we know Taiwan loves a "they met before and this is fate" plot so I think this would work well. Switching Sarawat's obsession with Scrubb to something else would be a really interesting cultural shift and would help ground the series in the adaptation country.
Korean adaptation of I Can Hear the Sunspot / Silhouette of Your Voice
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@absolutebl has said this before and they're right, this is the one JBL manga adaptation that I'd love to see it done again as a series with enough time to fully handle the character development that happens in the manga. NGL in my heart of hearts I'd want Japan to take another crack at it, but for this game I'll say Korea. I know Korea has a few good disability narratives (thinking of the love for Twinkling Watermelon I've heard about recently) so I think they could do a good job. Korean media also handles silence well and that's pretty critical for this one; they could also do some interesting things to illustrate the changes in the main character's hearing.
Japanese adaptation of Love Sick
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I am envisioning a reverse Cherry Magic scenario, in which the foreign adaptation follows the written source material better than the domestic adaptation did, and then adds their own flair. Now take this with a grain of salt because I haven't read the novel, but my understanding is that the original Thai novel is about Pun and Noh as the main characters with the music club all there but the dramatic side heterosexual storylines are not nearly as front and center, and they were added to pad out the show because folks weren't sure how a BL series would land. I know there is already a Thai remake but let's pretend that's not happening. Japan handles earnest and sweet school-aged first loves well, and can handle the goofiness required of the Noh character, and deeply understands and portrays found family core friendships well, and I bet a Japanese production would do a great job with that core storyline. We don't get a lot of larger friend groups in Japanese BL and I want to see a Japanese production handle that. The one thing that gave me hesitation about this was the importance of the busking subplot and I don't think busking is a big thing in Japan the way it is in Thailand and Korea but that could be another opportunity for making it feel more grounded in the adapting country so I'm keeping it as-is.
Thai adaptation of Boyband Love
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I'm going to steal the idea that I've seen @lurkingshan @bengiyo and @shortpplfedup mention before and riff of it to say that Daou and Offroad should be in a boyband BL; this is a main reason why I want a Thai remake of the Filipino series Boyband Love [which I don't actually recommend but, fun fact, had an out gay couple starring in it but they were not paired together in the show--Gus, who plays the lead Danny, has 2 kids with Louie who plays the side character Rico]. Thailand is clearly desperate to do a boyband BL so that they can make money off the concerts; Boyband Love as a story is already calibrated to be cheap to make because it's about a band getting ready to debut, and Thailand can scale it up from the original show. It's also no longer a period of COVID restrictions so crowds can be brought in. The storyline is pretty much what I would want of a Boyband BL: rivals within a band to lovers, pining amongst band members, underwater kiss, industry drama, and (spoilers for a 2020 series) the decision to essentially do BGP but keep their relationship secret. Thailand would have fun with that, I think. And they can add a little more heat, it's very important to me that something happens in the practice room pls and thank you.
Japanese adaptation of Middleman's Love
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Japan gets two because they can do this type of comedy so well, and I really liked the bones of the Thai version so I'd love to see it done again. Japan can also handle trauma narratives so if they wanted to do both Bed Friend and Middleman Love they would be able to handle it. Korea is really good at balancing humour and trauma, but Japan is so good at losers who don't think they deserve love, and also excellent at pining, so I'm giving this one to Japan.
Korean adaptation of Triage
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We're getting Korea twice because I haven't seen Korea do much in the way of genre BL yet, and while I admit this may be slightly influenced by me watching Hospital Playlist right now, Korea can handle the fast-paced ER scenes that are throughout this show, as well as the mix of drama and comedy. I'd love to see a more highly produced version of this show, and I know Korea can handle this kind of time loop shenanigans and heavenly spirits helping the protagonist along from kdramas. I liked the original a lot but I'd love to see it done again a little more tightly!
Bonus nonsense one: Taiwanese version of Calculating Love
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This one is literally just for me. Ok listen I know I'm the only one who likes this show, and that's fine, it doesn't actually deserve attention. And it's so small that it would never be adapted. But I loved this dorky little short about nerds flirting with calculus and I want more. Taiwan is fantastic at dorks falling in love narratives, and so many of the HIStory series were short school BL, so I think they'd do an excellent job tightening up the story in the back half which got a bit meander-y and keeping the heat that's already there.
Thank you again for the really fun ask, Rose! 💕
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jeskoholic · 10 months
Text
A Little Piece of You Chapter 17: The Ideal Girlfriend
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This is a chapter from an on-going series. If you missed out on the previous entries, you can check my masterlist.
Previous chapter: A Coffee Date
Word count: 5,640
Tags: Male OC, Bestfriend Yujin, College friends, School Convo
Enjoy
“Come on man; I already explained things to you… I don’t have a girlfriend. Don’t be stupid.”
“Oh, is that the really the case?”
“Dawn… I know who you’re talking about and you’re dead wrong. She is just my best friend and there’s nothing else in the middle. I don’t know what made you think about anything about that.”
Dawn chuckled.
“What do you mean, Jae-in? Eve you called her as your ‘girlfriend’ at some point, right?”
“I did that because she’s a girl, right? She’s also my friend, so I think it just makes sense that I warrant myself calling her that. And by the way, I did that because of that one particular time that Shinwon and Kino drank their butts off and started asking stupid questions. I remember answering back at their claims just to make them both shut up. It was my only way out.”
“Well, sometimes things do work out like that especially with Shinwon and Kino. It’s funny how we don’t often see them talking together recently… “
“Hey, I don’t know what’s with you and the rest of UK, but why are y’all putting me in the hot seat now? You have no idea how much of a chore I had to endure with all the questioning from Hongseok and the others. Heck, even Yeri is being added to the mix and I can’t do anything about it. It feels weird that I’m complaining about this now, especially when I was so cool at it a while back but… I guess I was just uncomfortable talking about Soyeon especially to them. I only felt that when I was already relaying what transpired.”
“I don’t know about them… as far as I’m concerned, I just want to everyone else to be happy. I mean, look how well this first official date went with Jisoo. Like I said, if I don’t screw things up, this boat is sailing away smoothly. As a friend, I want those same things to happen to you guys as well, especially you, my man. I can’t even express to you how happy am I knowing my friends are good with Jisoo. It makes my efforts for her more relaxed knowing I have you guys behind me.”
“I’m happy for you man. It turned out to be a good idea that you brought us on this.”
“Wait, Jae-in… I just realized something…”
“Which is…?”
“You know with all of these happening… I’m sorry but I’ll have to introduce Soyeon to the conversation again. Do you mind?”
“Go ahead, I guess. We’re pretty much talking about her already at this point so might as well.”
Dawn scratched the back of his head just as he and Jae-in crossed a street towards a bright shop, of where they proceeded to continue on walking.
“I realized that… it’s been a while since you and Soyeon went dating, or went out, whatever… I just figured, you never introduced her to anyone else rather than the group, am I correct? I’m curious as to how she’d react with Soyeon given her personality is drastically different from most of us.”
“Who are we talking about? Is it Yujin?”
“Of course man, who else could it be? You know how Yujin works and how she’s so picky with stuff, especially those who date you. It’s funny to think how Wonyoung hated her so much back in high school and her predictions never came to fruition. You and Yujin were still friends up to this day. It’s hilarious when I think about how much that hated seeing each other because of you. I wonder how your ex would react once she finds out that you two have gone stronger ever since.”
“I get where you’re going at. Yujin is pretty much very nitpicky on whoever I’m dating, or having an intention to date but she has her reasons. After what happened with Wonyoung, she made sure to have my back ever since. She’s always been the brain in my heart, as I tend to act out of impulse without thought. I would go as far and say that she’s the voice inside my head telling me to think twice about things before heading in, which is exactly why I trust her so much. Also, you know how guys have that hint whenever a dickhead is hitting on a girl with malicious intent? Girls have that too, man, and Yujin’s been the one warning me of everything… well, at least until recently anyway.”
“Yeah, I know that. I just wondered, in case you introduced Soyeon to her… what do you think she’d say about her, then? Do you think she’s going to have the same thought like you did?”
“Knowing Yujin, she’ll be the first person to tell me to back off. All those realizations, all those reasons why I chose to end it with Soyeon… I’m sure she would have seen it coming before I even thought about it. It would feel as if she’d be the one to back off for me while I still can’t get the courage to do so. I don’t know; like I said: womanly instincts. She’d be sure to tease about it to me at some point along that, too.”
Dawn nodded.
“Well, in a way I envy you; girls are pretty hard to understand. At least you have Yujin there to help you out for things, especially on the red flags we guys are normally blind to.”
“I guess so… although with that whole thing with Soyeon, I never really told her anything. Joohyun-noona even knows more than her on this regard… I guess I never really had the chance to tell her as it went on… I just never thought of her as well. With how quiet she is, maybe she’s just really busy recently.
“You know what, come to think of it… I never saw Yujin since the semester began. I guess being on a different engineering department ought to show how dedicated she is compared to us, and how physically and mentally committed she is on school. Then again, I didn’t expect less from a high school top student. At least she’s not spending her weekends going to bars like we do.”
“Jae-in, but I heard that you barely join Kyungsoo and the others when they invite you out. I heard that you’re not even showing up.”
There was a pause, which involved Jae-in giving his friend a joking glare only for Dawn to return it with a smirk.
“Okay, Mr Smart-ass, I know you’re happy. I get it. I’m happy for you as well. I just don’t get why Yujin suddenly got dragged into this conversation out of nowhere. Point is I really haven’t talked to her for a while so she has no idea what’s going on with me. It might surprise her with how much shit I’ve been through without even being halfway across the semester.”
“Maybe that’s the point. I genuinely got curious how come she’s never heard of anything… surprised, even. You got to tell her and catch up, man. You two have been through a lot and she ought to know at some point. In that case, it would be better if it would be from you.”
Kim Hyojong and Yoon Jae-in reached the end path of the long street they have been traversing on. The skies have completely showed its vibrant purple hue as the day succumbed into the incoming evening. As always, Seoul’s bright night life had begun to bare itself amidst the baby steps of the twilight. Shops began to show their innate beauty along with the approaching evening, with Jae-in only being able to realize what he was missing right as he and Hyojong were about to part ways. He stood with his eyes on the marketplace’s humble horizon, its roof carefully etched to match the elegance of the incoming dusk.
Maybe I should. I do kinda miss that chaos of a girl as well.
---
After the grand culmination of Dawn’s plan, it was suffice to say that he had once again become incognito, but I quite expected that. I really could not blame him; after that good enough of a start, he ought to focus all of his efforts towards Jisoo if he really want to make the most out of what has been given to him. Plus, the rest of the United Kwangya have been really confined lately, with the conversations solely existing between the occasional appearances of Ningning complaining about how she constantly forgets her basic maths skills, Kino teasing her about it, Kyungsoo moderating all of them. Yeri and Shinwon became the new love birds of the group effectively replacing me and Soyeon, which was a good thing. Granted, we never really displayed our affection in front of our friends, even if it was just a group chat, but at least the rest of the members attention were focused on them and not us. They didn’t even bother to bring up the topic of Jisoo and Dawn for the rest of the conversations.
Still, there was no word from Soyeon, as expected. It was also rather odd that I don’t see her around campus, be it with Ningning or Kyungsoo even for just a chance encounter. I don’t know if she’s doing that on purpose or we’re really just not allowed to see each other with fate dictating what the best is for both of us.
But I guess I could not complain with that. At least she and I could get a huge breathing room.
With the threat of the exams just being around the corner, I figured I might as well grab the chance to catch up with a long-time friend of mine. Who knows when she’ll be busy again?
I messaged Yujin exactly on that night that Dawn and I went our separate ways. Well, given the really tight schedule of this particular woman, I had to arrange our next get-together after quite a long time. Days passed and it was another weekend, and like how it passed by with Hyojong I found myself on a local bubble tea shop with a rather high, wooden ceiling. It was this small, compact space with a natural vibe echoing off of it with the wooden furniture, floorboards, ceiling, as well as the entire house-like feel of it. The open windows raged from all around, with the rear exit offering a veranda filled with chairs coupled with the breath-taking view of the city.
As much as I love the feel of the wind grazing my face as we’d consume our respective bubble teas, with the length of Yujin’s hair it ought to get to her face at some point. I don’t want to ruin her experience here just because of that, so I elected to pick tables indoors.
“Jae-in, heya,” I heard her voice call from the entrance of the shop’s doorway, appearing all in her youthful presence as she supplied me with an enthusiastic smile. “You finally decided to ask me out, hmmm? Can’t seem to find the perfect fairy for all this?”
Ahn Yujin greeted me on the same way she would almost every time I see her, and that is always with a wide smile over her tall stature. She showed up today with the clear understanding that white was the colour for that meet, having decided to wear a matching white long sleeves and track pants, finished with her white sneakers that fixed the over-all get-up while a folded jacket draped over her arm. Yujin had once again decided to have her bangs, and I think it suited her perfectly. Seeing her on a hairstyle I haven’t seen her do since high school, and especially on this time that I haven’t seen her for a while, it felt so nostalgic and very comforting in a way. It did felt like a relief to see my best friend from highschool looking and glowing so well. I’d lie if I didn’t miss this girl one bit.
“Give me a break, Yujin,” I replied to her as I smirked. “This might be on me but it’s far from being a date. I already ordered and it’s already here for you. I was actually serious when I said that your tea might screw itself up when you come in late.”
“Excuse me, oppa; you’re the one who’s early. I’m just in time. If this tastes bad, I’m going to ask you for another one.”
“I’m willing to bet that it’s not. I made sure to get your favourite.”
“Is that so?” Yujin replied as she rather surprisingly took the space next to me instead of the chair opposite where I was seated. She placed the small hand bag she had with her and brushed her bangs before taking the drink ordered for her.
“You know that there is a chair opposite me, right?”
“Well, I can see that. I can also see that you’re smart enough to pick the couch for yourself. In that case, endure sitting there. At least you have a pretty fairy next to you; that’s not a loss whatsoever.”
“It feels like it’s you who missed teasing me, Yujinnah. It almost makes me feel bad that I treated you out here,” I replied to her as a joke, which immediately earned a slap towards my arm.
“Yah, fine I’ll just stop,” she said and then proceeded to sip from the drink I bought her. “So what’s up with the sudden call, Jae-in? Are you heartbroken again?”
Oh my god… the fact that I know she’s joking but at the same time being so spot on is crazy on itself.
Now it feels awkward to open up because she did it first like that.
“I guess that’s the case then. You’re silence is more than enough evidence for it. Plus, your face says it all,” she concluded before I could even speak.
It’s so hard when someone knows you so damn much.
“Come on now… of course at some point I’m going to have to ask you out for us to catch up. I know how busy your department could get, being stuck on huge Chem books and all. I’m surprised that you even squeezed me into your busy sched.”
“It’s not that hectic, Jae-in, really. Most of you people are pretty much exaggerating when it comes to our study habits as well as our activities.”
“Really…? So everything that I’ve been hearing was just an exaggeration? Is that why I never even managed to bump unto you if it was even just by chance? It’s like we’re not even in the same university, you know.”
“Well… actually… it’s not an exaggeration because it’s an understatement, really. Oh my… you have no idea how happy I am that you asked me out, actually. I’ve never felt so burned out recently. You not being my classmate take a lot of time getting used to.”
“You’re not used to being around that much of a girl circle now, do you?”
“It’s… It’s definitely different. The people I’m with now… I feel like they’re so pigeonholed into the one goal of the degree we’re all pursuing. I get that, but I’m naturally a fun and outgoing person so… having to stay back with them feels really hard, especially when I’m used to being with you and not taking things all too seriously while still making things work out. It feels impossible to do that now. I also kinda miss us walking home together and sharing some street food on the way to the apartment like we did before. I can’t do that now because… I need to be high profile to blend in. It sucks for my wallet, too.”
“Did I mishear you or did you just tell me that you missed me?”
Yujin nearly choked from her chocolate mix as she supressed a laugh. That was not really intentional.
“Maybe I did… this entire thing of us going out felt so refreshing to me. I’m being serious now.”
“Well, if that’s the case… I’m happy that I thought of asking you when I did. I just figured that maybe it was high time for us to catch up on a couple different axes. I also figured things have come really differently on our first semester away from each other. I was wondering how you’re dealing with the change.”
“I don’t think I have to worry about you now, do I?” She said; keeping her keen eyes planted on my drink at the desk. “I heard a lot from Kyungsoo-oppa. He told me that you’ve been hanging out a lot with them at bars every weekend. Is that true?”
“Umm…”
Well, technically…
“If that’s really the case, then I’m really envious. I don’t think I’ve touched a single glass of alcohol since we parted ways…. By the way, what did you order? What’s in your cup? I don’t think I’ve seen that before.”
What?
Yujin’s sudden interest to whatever I ordered really threw me off, but then again she was always like this. I was just starting to take in what was going on with her when she grabbed the drink from my end of the table and brought it closer to her face. Yujin then eyed the contents through the small hole of the straw, even closing her other eye to get a better view at it.
“What flavour is this, Jae-in? I don’t think I’ve tried this out before. It looks like a cookie and vanilla mix.”
“Oh uhh… it’s apparently called a Snow Leopard. I got it because I love cookies and cream flavoured things. It’s good. Try it out.”
With that, Yujin nodded and immediately went off to sip from my straw; her eyes lighting up. She then took her drink and slid it on the table towards my side as if beckoning me to taste the very thing I ordered for her. I casually took the drink and took a sip from her straw and my taste buds were immediately filled with the unusual chocolate flavour. I did not expect less from a triple chocolate mix that Yujin dearly loves.
“Damn… that was an experience. I might try that out for myself some time,” she exclaimed as she returned my drink to my side of the table. “I might have drank a bit so it’s a bit lesser than… yeah. You get it.”
“Don’t worry. I expected nothing less, Ahn Yujin.”
She slapped my arm and in turn smiling towards my direction.
“Well, anyway I’ll head us back to the topic at hand before I got distracted. I heard a lot of deals from Kyungsoo, you know; some of which even surprised me so much.”
“I actually did not expect Kyungsoo to tell you something, but that’s not saying that I didn’t want you hearing about me. It’s not like I’m hiding it or anything. It’s just… I was expecting that you’d know soon but from either Kino or Shinwon, not Kyungsoo. I wonder how that went down…”
“I’ll have you know, it was Kyungsoo who told me because he felt so concerned towards you. He didn’t entirely tell me of everything, because in his head those still deserve to be told by you. All he told me was things have been rough for you lately, and asked me to check on you whenever I had the time. They said you’ve pretty much gone incognito from them, especially recently. I guess when you asked me out for this one, maybe it was a huge deciding factor for me to go as well.”
“So I guess he knew that I’d reach you at some point. He’s not wrong. Be it that I’m reaching you out because I want to catch up on a couple of different matters, there’s no denying that thing have been crazy rough lately, especially the couple last weeks. Let’s just say that I’m dealing with the aftermath of that, as you know it affected me now less than it did with… with someone named Jeon Soyeon.”
“Ah, so that’s her name, huh? Well then, we have all afternoon, Jae-in. Now I’m curious. Tell me the entire thing. Tell me how you and this Soyeon girl ended up, and why you decided to cut ties with her once you felt it was wrong.”
---
The one thing that Jae-in loved so much about Yujin was that she has always been a good listener.
She merely sat throughout the entire conversation, merely giving her best friend the occasional nods and shakes whenever there was an interesting detail with regards to the story, but of course included with that were the extreme reactions from Yujin’s rather expressive face.  Given how confident he is with her, Jae-in elected to not only include his insights among everything that happened, but also the details he would normally reserve for himself; that included everything, especially intimate moments. As expected, Yujin gave him a face of alarm. The ghost of that expression seemed to have continued until he reached the latter part of his story.
“Well, I guess you can see now why I ended what was going on between us,” Jae-in said with a clear conclusion. “It’s crazy, right? We haven’t gotten halfway through the semester yet and I already have this on the bag. It speaks too much about how bothered I am with the sudden development.”
“My god, Jae-in… I didn’t expect this to be this involved! You know what, I haven’t met this girl yet and I already do not like the sound of everything. It feels like there’s nothing linking you together aside from your sudden outbursts of hormones, and that’s even trying to call it by the simplest of ways, believe me. You two are just horny, especially during all this.”
“I… I guess so…”
“You know, the fact that it turned out the way it did, it somehow reminded me of your ex. I’m sure that I’m not the only one who felt that, right?”
“That’s… well, most of the reason why I chose to back off largely was because of Wonyoung. Things have been… I don’t even know how to put it out, actually. I just felt that it was wrong to continue because it was something that I never wanted in the first place. It sucks that it even had to go to that degree that it was already too difficult to let her go given the circumstances. At this point, I’m just happy that I pulled it off.”
“As you should,” Yujin replied earnestly. She then proceeded to place her now-empty drink over the table and cross her legs afterwards. “My god, I could not even imagine how much of a sump we’ll have to go through again if she ended up being like exactly like Wonyoung. I would not be surprised if she did. I mean, look at her; she’s pretty much a girl who could get any guy she would like. They tend to get really reactive and loud expressing their feelings but when they don’t get what they want, the results would automatically be a disaster for the guy… for you, Yoon Jae-in.”
“Ummm…”
“Damn, can you imagine how things turned out with you and Wonyoung from before? Do you still remember how she hated me so much just for the fact that you’re my best friend… it’s as if I could do something about that? Hello…? What am I supposed to do? I’m not even wedging myself between you two and she acts as if we’re having sex in the dark.”
Jae-in chuckled.
“I do remember that; of course. We almost never go out together even for a small lunch out because he’s always like a detective watching me all the time. It’s so uncomfortable. I can’t even nod or greet you when we bump into each other while you have Wonyoung walking beside you, Jae-in. One small eye-contact between us, I immediately get a glare from her, Oh my god; I think she wants me to stop being your best friend back then. She wants me to be invisible when you’re around, like what the fuck?”
Jae-in chuckled and Yujin smiled at his reaction.
“You know, Yujin, now that I’m openly talking about this, that’s pretty much how it turned out before. You know how Wonyoung and I always argued about you; that she’s threatened of our friendship given how our relationship developed from us initially being best friends as well. She always thought that at some point, I’ll give her up for you. I’m pretty sure that it did happen, you know; I chose you as my best friend instead of sulking on our doomed relationship anyway.”
“Jae-in, hearing all this from you makes me want to go out and eat lunch with you, but not a normal one. We should make sure that Wonyoung sees it as well, just so we can show her how our friendship thrived further the moment that she was out of the picture. I want to show her that a guy and a girl could be friends without falling for each other.”
“You… you talk as if we didn’t really try to make something else out of this,” Jae-in remarked calmly. “In a way, we’re not really a good example for that, all things considered.”
“Well, the keyword was we DID try to make something out of it. It just didn’t feel right. I never thought that I’d ever be awkward to you, and I don’t want that one week of attempted dating to happen again between us. We’re soul mates Jae-in, and maybe that means that we’re destined to be the best of friends since the very beginning.”
“If you put it out that way, it makes me feel so happy that we chose friendship instead of making something impossible out of this one. You always had my back, Yujin. I’ll always be grateful for that”
“We didn’t work out, Jae-in, because I know that I’m not really your type,” Yujin said with a tone of humour, covering her mouth with her hand in the process. “And that’s okay for me, you know. I have no problems with it.”
“Wait, wait, that’s interesting, since you brought it up, what do you think my type is, exactly? What does Ahn Yujin think of Yoon Jae-in’s ideal girl and that is in terms of a lot of factors. Let’s hear you enumerate everything.”
“Ahh, so we’re in that stage now, hmm?” Yujin said before shifting her place on the couch and then rubbing her palms together. “Now this is interesting. Are you asking this from me so that you can confirm the similarities with what I’m about to say?”
“Maybe… or perhaps I could get an idea because I felt like I haven’t been running standards for a long time. It doesn’t have to be so complex, and you can base it on the previous people I’ve taken a liking on.”
“Well, I can’t do everything because we might take all afternoon… how about three?”
“Fair. Let’s do that.”
“Good enough. Well for starters, girls that are way too feminine do not pique your interest in any way, Jae-in. I’m pretty sure you are aware of that. You don’t like the typical text-book reserved, campus-crush kind of deal. You don’t like girls who are very well known because they are using fame to be something else. I get that it’s not that bad, but you’re not just into it because it feels fake. Does that make any sense?”
“It’s not something I would expect to come from you but I think I can understand it.”
“Good. Next, you’re more into people with strong personalities, which conflicts the other interest I just mentioned. I don’t know, but there’s a thin line between people you like who are have a very strong presence but not being over-all too feminine and vulgar about at the same time. I can get understand it in my head but I can’t find the words for it. I’ve been you friend for so long and I think I can understand it without words. I mean, I’ve met some people who were so timid and shy on the face value and yet they’re much defined once you get to know them. It’s kind of like that.”
The fact that she knows so much about me, up to this degree is somehow amazing and scary at the same time. It makes me wonder if I’m that much obvious whenever I’m with her.
But then again, maybe I am. I’m just that comfortable when I’ve with Yujin that I don’t seem to mind what kind of stories I spill to her. This conversation was way more yielding than I thought.
“Now for the last one, this one feels more like an observation from my end but somehow attracted to mature girls. It does not necessarily mean that you’re into girls that are older than you, but often enough age is often associated with maturity so I guess things tend to curve that way when it’s all said and done. It correlates. I guess there’s that sense of security that you get when it comes to people like that. In a way, it perfectly concludes all of the points I’ve stated previously.”
“I don’t think that… that it’s entirely true for Wonyoung. I mean, our ages are not that far apart you know.”
“Honestly, Wonyoung or even the Soyeon girl does not fit any of the traits I have mentioned. That explains why it was not a surprise that you decided to cut it off. On Wonyoung, I could understand, because at least you two developed from friends, but for the Soyeon girl, I guess it was pretty self-explanatory.”
“I guess so… I suddenly became conscious of the traits you mentioned, you know. I can’t bring myself to not consider them the next time that I take a liking into someone…”
“And you should, so that you won’t just fall on someone who barely even fits your standards. At least by then you’d be able to sort things out for yourself. I get it, Jae-in; love is one huge trial and error, but how many errors are you planning to bust through that you’ll finally let yourself loose for the world, hmm?”
“I… I don’t know.”
“Jae-in, you’re a very soft, kind-hearted person and that’s about one thing that I really love about you. I’m pretty sure that I’m not the first one who said that, but on times like these it’s working against you. You need to learn when to say ‘no’ and keep you standards to yourself, because at the end of the day you still need to look after yourself. Can’t date ever girl in the world to find out if you’re compatible or not, right?”
“I’m trying to keep that in mind, Yujin… it’s just that with this Soyeon situation, I let it unfold to a painfully hard situation to get out of before I even began to make a move. It’s a mistake I don’t intend to do again.”
Jae-in sat there in silence, keeping his gaze peeled towards the empty drink he had in front of him. He may have stayed in that state for so long that Yujin grew concerned. There was a sudden, surprising sensation from his left side, only for it to be revealed to be from Yujin’s end. Somehow through the silence, she placed her hand over his as an act of affirmation and assurance. She then clasped it, making sure that Jae-in felt the presence of her then and there.”
“Don’t think of it badly, Jae-in. I’m not blaming you for everything that happened to you. In fact, I really admire your courage for being honest to the girl. No one should take away the emotions you battled while you’re at it, as well. Also… as much as I’m trying to force these sorts of ideas unto you, in the end we’re still human beings. Things could not be bound ideally, as they say.
“Finding a perfect person definitely involves a bound of luck as well as a good stroke of fate. You’ll never know when you’ll meet her, or if you’ve even met her already. The range of your destiny could be someone you’ve already spent a long time being with to someone you accidentally tripped over on the way home. It’s easier once you let your heart welcome it instead of your mind.”
I honestly don’t know if she’s aware of the mixed messages she’s sending about. However, there’s no denying that things like this are pretty hard to understand. In fact, a woman’s heart is hard to understand, as I heard someone wise once said.
“Sorry, I got carried away,” Yujin said finally, returning them both back to earth once again as she shook her head. “We should go, Jae-in; we’ve stayed so long here that we’re already hogging the best seat in the entire shop. Besides, I want to walk the park for a bit if you’re game. Shall we?”
And with one final nod, Jae-in agreed. The preparation to leave was as quick as the decision to do so with Yujin being the first one to head on off for them both. However, as Yoon Jae-in and Ahn Yujin walk towards the wide doors of the welcoming shop, the young man was dazed with the apparition of their final conversation; clearly curious as to what kind of destiny the future holds for a guy like him.
He has a feeling that fate would confirm his destiny very soon.
---
Next Chapter: Black Swan
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