#and then i collected all the pills and ate thru them in like a month

[dimitrescus-bitch]

Tap (Jennifer Jareau x Reader)

Your morning had started peacefully. You woke up, took your shower, and met JJ in the kitchen for breakfast. On the table next to your morning cup of tea sat your new prescription for ADHD medication. For a good part of your life, you had just let yourself be undiagnosed. The fast pace of your mind had always worked in your favor, but as you got older, problems began to arise. In times where you would need to try and really focus, you found yourself utterly unable to. 

It had been JJ who had taken you to see a psychiatrist for the official diagnosis. After a couple of months of weekly sessions, you got your diagnosis and JJ went with you to pick up your pills. It had been a rough adjustment at first, but eventually things began to normalize for you. 

“Good morning,” JJ greeted you. You smiled at her from where you sat. She turned around and came towards you with a plate. You scooted over in your chair, making room for her to sit with you. “Hungry?” 

“Very.” As if to accentuate your point, your stomach rumbled. She sat down next to you and the two of you ate your breakfast together. It wasn’t anything fancy, but you were glad to have that moment with her. 

“They’re cold in the middle,” JJ said as she glared at her toaster strudel. You shrugged and quickly finished yours so that you could get dressed completely. JJ poured your tea into a to-go mug and told you to go wait for her in the car. You sat in the passenger’s seat and turned on the radio. 

As you waited for JJ, you tapped your fingers to the drum beat of the song and swayed a little to the riff. You hadn’t heard the song before, but you definitely liked it. JJ let you control the radio as she drove. It was about an hour’s drive to Quantico from your place, which made you wish that the two of you had stayed over at JJ’s. There had been a reason why you hadn’t last night, but all you could remember about the night before was how you kept making JJ laugh in bed. 

“Y/n!” JJ yelled, spooking you. You jumped and turned to look at her. She was in the drive-thru line of a Starbucks, looking at you like she was expecting an answer. “Do you want something to drink?” 

“Iced mocha please,” you told her as you got out your credit card. JJ nodded and took your card from you. The two of you had an agreement, you got morning coffees and JJ got the coffees whenever the two of you landed wherever your case was in the afternoon. “How’d you sleep last night?” 

“Alright, you picked a pretty interesting spot to stay still,” JJ told you. 

“Sorry, must have been having a pretty weird dream if I was moving around a lot,” you reasoned. JJ nodded and peeked her head out of the window to see how many cars were ahead of hers. “I think I was dreaming about a bear.” 

“Explains the growling,” JJ mused. 

“I think it’d be pretty cool to be a bear. It would kind of suck though because I’m not sure how complex their communication is. Would I have the same thoughts I do now? Do you think that my mind would still work like it does now? Could it be my mind if it didn’t run rampant? That’s a funny word, rampant. It sounds sort of dirty, but I can’t really explain why. I mean, it’s just a word. There’s nothing dirty about it if you think about it. There isn’t anything dirty about words, not in their origins. We just make them that way.” 

“Y/n, honey, breathe,” JJ said as she put her hand on your thigh. You stopped talking and your face heated up as she squeezed a little. You shrunk back into yourself a bit and stared out the window again. “For the record, I think if you were a bear, your mind would be the same. That’s what makes you, well, you.” 

You hummed in response as you watched a group of birds on a power line. The car started moving forward and you turned so that you could keep watching the birds. There wasn’t a particular reason for you to be watching them, but you couldn’t really stop once you’d started. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 

Sometimes, it sucked whenever you became aware of what you were doing. Morgan and Prentiss were good about not mentioning it whenever you started tapping your fingers on things or clicking a pen. Reid, however, had no qualms about telling you that you’d begun doing that and how much harder it made his work for him. 

Maybe he’d been in a bad mood, so he had been a little extra snappy with you. That didn’t excuse him upsetting you. It didn’t excuse the way that he’d snapped at you about being quiet. It just rationalized his response for you a bit. That made it a bit easier for you not to break down in the breakroom because once again your head was filled with thoughts of how much of a burden you were to your friends. 

You started to pace as the thoughts wedged themselves through the cracks of your resolve. You made sure not to start sobbing as to not draw attention to yourself. Silently crying, you paced back and forth. You counted the timing of your steps to try and distract yourself, but ended up just multitasking instead. You kept your head down, not looking up as a familiar pair of shows came into your eyeline. You didn’t stop until JJ’s hands were cradling your face. 

“Hey,” she said softly. “Can you look at me please?” 

“Is the tapping really that bad?” you asked JJ. It was an uphill battle trying to keep your voice even, but JJ wouldn’t mind it if you broke in front of her for a second. 

“No, of course it isn’t. Even if it was, you can’t help that. Come on, you can do your work in my office for a bit. Sometimes, I think that you need to stay away from Reid,” JJ told you. “He can be inconsiderate when it comes to you.” 

“Maybe I’m too much for everyone else?” you asked and JJ scoffed. 

“Not at all, he’s just upset you came in and swooped me off my feet. Now, come on, let’s get that paperwork done,” JJ said and you collected your things from your desk and went up to JJ’s office. You set up shop on the floor with your back leaning against the couch in case you needed to reset your spine a little. 

“Can I have kisses if I finish this stack by lunch?” you asked JJ as you held up a stack of about 6 files. She counted the outsides of them and nodded before going back to her own work. She put on a little music for you, knowing that it helped you clear your head and focus a little. JJ was good like that, she knew how to help you do what you needed to get done, and she didn’t complain about you tapping your fingers or clicking your pen once.

#jennifer jareau x reader #jennifer jareau imagine #jennifer jareau imagines #jennifer jareau #jj x reader #jj imagine #jj imagines #jj #criminal minds #criminal minds imagine #criminal minds imagines #criminal minds x reader #criminal minds fanfiction