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vargaslovinghours · 1 year

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Requestober 2022 Sketches: Vargas Edition

Btw, you’ll be wanting to keep an eye out for this playlist! It’s updating once a week every week until every day of Requestober has been posted, so for quite a while lol, but there’s a few already up!

Day 1, starting the month off with some cuteness! ♥ I originally had Scriabin a bit more inquisitive and curious behind Edgar, just kind of shyly ducking out of view, but I do like the full fluster that I ended up with ♪

I also imagined Jake in a jacket throughout the fic but I felt like it wouldn’t communicate well from behind haha. Everybody gets jackets! Hehe, Jake-et. Scriabin super flustered and blushed up, being touched by someone other than Edgar in a nice way ♥

Day 3 got multiple hug doodles, big shock there lol, I wasn’t sure what to do with such a broad prompt at first, so I just did all of the ideas I had lol. I do love when they hold each other soooo closely, hugging for dear life <3 Holding the back of the head is so sweet to me ahh. And then a silly one where presumably Scriabin got a bit heated and needed some cool-off holds. Maybe if you stopped jumping straight to fight every time-

Truly, what is a hug tho, does a cuddle count?

This time Edgar being impulsive and wanting a hug! I drew these a bit apart but I thought they fit together well, always one acting responsible over the other, they trade it back and forth ♪

And then what finally ended up being Day 3 <3 It’s toootally not a hug you guys, it’s just the two of them holding each other up, nothing deeper than that, just ignore the ♥ hehe

Day 4, what a rambunctious scamp! He looks so pleased with himself with that fake cigarette haha

I took the lines pretty much directly from my traditional sketch, no digital re-sketching, but you can see in the final version I forgot Edgar’s antennae haha

Day 8, the first of the minicomics >:3c I really couldn’t help myself, like I said in the tags, I’d been waiting for two years to get the idea out of my head and onto paper and it turned out pretty much exactly like I wanted it to ahh ♪ Moth Edgar with big fluffy wings and antenna! Too cute!

And of course Scriabin looking as dorky as possible lol ♥ That’s what you get for being an impulsive Act Now Think Later kind of guy! I think the original line I wrote that heck-while ago was “It was funnier in theory” but I think this phrasing is cuter :D

Day 10 went around a few times before I settled on the final version, I originally had Scriabin directly touching Edgar’s scars but I decided that was a little too bold for ‘’’’’’strangers‘’’’’’ to come right out of the gate on. He’s not going to listen to you if you stomp all over his boundaries right at the start! You have to ease your way in first lol

More of Day 10′s meandering ideas, almost got the dialogue I wanted

Rude

And finally settled on a single image! It’s dialogue-heavy but I think it works well ♪ I had a few extra notes, like where to put the lines of dialogue, Scriabin’s hand on Edgar’s face, that Edgar accidentally ended up being tiny in comparison lol, all good stuff

“You should give worshipping me a try”

You didn’t think I forgot about the hug that become Day 11 did you! This was part of the initial Day 3 set but it got repurposed, say thank you anon. I really love when Edgar manhandles Scriabin around a bit, mean as it can be sometimes, and the idea of him being strong enough to pick him up but maybe not vice versa, ah, it gets me! A hug he truly can’t get away from, unless he wants to fall over. At least he’ll take Edgar with him lol

Day 12 took a bit to get started as well, I wanted something where Scriabin is actually being a faily guardian but I only came up with him being a little blindsided to begin with

Of course he’d have to wear it, even paper flowers go in Scriabin’s hair ♥

More cutes while brainstorming, napping together ♥ (psst, @fandomfriend, here’s what I was hinting at ;)

But I did finally get there in the end! Panels out of order of course lol, but was even able to get the caption and some of the tags together haha ♪ I like the final version too, but I honestly think Scriabin’s expression in the 2nd panel is great ♥

Day 13 got a few different costume drafts! In fact, I very nearly went with the first one, partially because it was a costume I had when I was little haha. Todd the plane and Shmee the aviator! Very cute. I also considered both of them dressed up as wildlife explorers which was also very cute, but in the end I’m happy I went with the King and Prince theme :D

Day 14′s spooky spider theme ooh ✨ I do wish I’d had a bit more time to work on it, but I’m still pleased with how it turned out, sketch included! Scriabin being spooky in the background is always fun, and he’s got even more lenses to flash from than usual haha

A few days after I did the initial sketches, I returned to the web idea because I kept thinking about how sparkly Ilwrath webs are and I wanted some sparkly webs myself! I thought it would suit Scriabin as well, him “catching” small shards of glass, sparkly stones, pieces of mirror, little trinkets - things that represent him :)

And then a silly follow-up to being tossed into the web lol. Are you gonna argue with a 6′ spider? Didn’t think so

Day 15 was one that I didn’t have the sketch to work with while drawing so I had to use it as an on-hand reference instead haha. I do think both versions turned out nice! Especially Scriabin’s hand on Edgar’s hip haha ♪ The head angles changed a bit from sketch to final and I can’t decide which I like more honestly - Edgar demure and Scriabin leaning further in here is just so sweet

I did end up doodling Scriabin setting everything on fire and bringing out his wings, just a little bit haha ♥

I just kept poking around at ideas for Day 15! I remember having a very strong image of the two of them moving through an indistinct background until Scriabin settled them at Eat Or Die (lol) while reading, and that also being very defined in my mind’s eye but I’d never tried to draw it up to this point. I might return to it on a future reread

And then as well I got to thinking about the Scriabin of the stories they make up together, and how he’d always been separate from Edgar until they met, how different that would make him, how his glasses would always be grey :0 Melancholy

Day 16 was much the same as 15 in that I didn’t digitize directly from the sketch, thus the lack of brush here haha, there’s only so far grooming manually can get you! Definitely struggled with keeping his silhouette clean, he gets lost in all that fluff hehe

@brusk-ghost asked to set aside the 18th so I actually made these a bit early, around Day 12, but it finally got the spotlight for Day 18! The posing changed around a good bit, as well as Edgar’s attire. I’m glad I went with the waistcoat, the négligée I had in mind would’ve probably been just a bit too much lol

I actually drew the bonus first, had to segway into real vampirism through silliness first lol

Day 21′s crossover yaaay <3 I love Camilo! He’s probably my second favourite character right after Bruno so I was happy to draw him again, and I always love Todd meeting up with people who are nice to him :D

I wasn’t sure of his hand posing at first so I doodled a couple extra Todds hiding behind Shmee but in the end I’m happy with what I went with :)

Day 22′s original draft was a lot sillier, even than the silly thing that become the final version lol. You’re making Edgar concerned, Scriabin! Edgar’s not the only one who needs to get out more haha

Day 22 was I’m pretty sure the first time I’ve actually drawn Shmee “alive”?? I’ve doodled him emoting before but like, intentionally looking like a blank-faced teddy bear, if that makes sense. It didn’t feel out of the ordinary or anything which is maybe even more odd haha, it was fun to doodle him being cartoony

And then there’s this lol. Like I mentioned in the tags, I was really struggling with Scriabin’s reaction expression, so I tried a few different ones before I remembered about the Spamton face, which you can even see my notes for there in the upper right corner haha. Scriabin makes the best faces! It was fun to draw him a bunch of times, even with the little frustration of not knowing which one I wanted haha

This one was, as noted, probably a bit too much lol

And then finally, mostly what I wanted and ended up using in the end haha ♪ Muppet mouth <3

Day 23 was a simple only-one-doodle-needed kind of day, thankfully haha ♪ I knew going into it that I could use my little error message box so I threw it in for funsies :D

Day 24 was originally pretty different! It had Edgar’s aim a lot closer to where it should’ve been, but it didn’t involve anything other than his hands and I wanted all of him to be included, so I had to scrap it, which also meant most of Scriabin’s mask :( I also didn’t get to draw Edgar straight-on, but I wanted to give him a whole bunch of accessories for vampire hunting! Belt of stakes, a gun with silver bullets and a leather chest holster, all decked out! I’m pleased enough to have drawn them all here haha

I think the final version is the happiest medium tho ♪ Little bit of the mask, some blood (including the bite Scriabin left on him in Day 18! Now bandaged ♪), and Scriabin’s really fun hand pose holding Edgar’s neck ♥ I do really have to give it to the anon for putting the butterfly imagery in my head about it, fancy look ✨

For day 27 I wanted to do some brainstorming first since I don’t usually draw zombies. It ended up being a bit more sad/scary than I wanted, but I was still trying for at least a little silliness; Scriabin is using bullying humour to try and cope but he’s scared too </3

The final version ended up much funnier I think, and more dynamic! :D I was absolutely thinking about the beginning of Lilo and Stitch, when Nani intentionally falls onto Lilo lol, it’s the Older Sibling instinct, and the Younger to complain about it haha

The first doodle for Jealous Edgar, could be about anything! Drew Scriabin’s glasses as grey so it’s probably After, but what if it was in reaction the Player from the Dating Sim? He just comes home and grumpily hugs him haha ♪ Scriabin pulling a “You’re so obvious” himself hehe

And then the alt ended up becoming the final version! I’m not sure how well it came across in the final version, but I intended for Edgar’s pose to look like he was holding Scriabin behind him, like sweeping his hand to keep him from being very visible to the player while Scriabin peeks out to wave goodbye. It was really fun to draw his Jealous™ eyes traditionally haha, the scratchy texture feels like it really brings out the “Back Off” vibes ♪

I had a few more ideas for UI, to do with the little ❌s at the bottom of Edgar’s text box; the three states of the boxes are empty, ♥, and ❌; both ♥s and ❌s are indelible, meaning if you insult one of them enough, you lock out the opportunity of filling that box with a ♥, ever. In this run, Edgar has no ♥s and three (or here, five) ❌s, meaning the player was real mean to him

And finally Day 31 ♥ I only ended up doodling these like, twenty minutes before drawing them digitally so I didn’t get a chance to scan them in beforehand, which I think is a real shame! I mean, look how cute Edgar is! Slightly more awake eyes hehe, and I wasn’t sure where to put Scriabin’s “you know” at first

Speaking of traditional cutes, look at how floofy Scriabin ended up being! Adorable 💕

So that’s all of the Vargas Requestobers from 2022! Busy busy busy year!

#💟#Doodles #Art #Jake #Edgar #Scriabin #Todd #Shmee #Blood #Sketchdump #I've decided to officially-unoffically add Requestober Roundups to the sketchdump tag since I mean - that's effectively what they are lol #I got very close to Vargastober this year huh lol #Of all years I definitely wasn't expecting Year 3 lol #It was fun tho! Lots of very unique ideas that were fun to work with :D #It was also the first year to completely fill the slots and considering how many were Vargas I'll have to give big thanks there hehe #And even still I had way more ideas than what were sent in haha ♪ I guess that's how it goes after a hiatus #Please do check out the playlist as well! It's been an interesting endeavor making all the videos >:3c #You'll see what I mean about not having the sketches in some of the upcoming ones ♪#And just in general I hope you enjoy them because I enjoyed making them :D #Thanks again to everyone for participating ♥ It was a fun year and big big big thanks to you

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lemongogo · 5 months

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i need 2 stop drawing static stuff . white bg . front facing pose. <will do it again

#i looked thru my media tab 2day .horrific #WHERES THA PURPOSEEEE E #there doesnt have 2 be any . of coursies .#but thats smt i want to work on rly hard T_T 2024!!!!!!!!!#smth smth reflection but i am happy with what ive done in 2023 #definitely havent finished as many things as id hoped but thats okay.kind of touched on it w that one trgn comp a few months ago #but i tried 2 be more confident in areas i wasnt so sure abt before and it paid off in a way that im happy with T__T❤️#like despite all my gloom & burnout and artblock . i had a lot of fun . and im rly fortunate that ive been able to meet the nicest ppl #through it T__T #idk what jm talking abt anymore but j think . i am happy w the direction im headed in and i just need to work harder now on variability #and concept and composition. not rly sure where to start but i think compiling some of my favs in a single place #and studying them will help. :3.. AND NOT GIVING UP A SKETCH IF ITS FRUSTRATING ATM😭😭😭😭#some of them ..that one w meryl and vash . i ould not for the life of me figure out and i was like soo done w it #but then i was likeno OK just do it who cares . and then i found a workflow that worked and it WAS SOO MUCH FUNNN AND I STILL RLY LOVE HOW #IT TURNED OUTTT ..#and the one w knives . the beautiful universe one . i rmbr being so annoyed by a similar attempt that inwas lkke fuck it im just gna use the #biggest brush ever and play arnd with stuff bc its not gna see the light of day and fhen j agonized abt sharing it and everyone WAS SOOO #NICE TO ME !!&2&2 LIKEEE it was one of my earliest trgn pieces so kind of new 2 da scene and lkke . idk man it helped me enjoy my art from #an outside perspective after struggling w the doubt and its now one of my favorites ever too …#ORRR .. the vash and wolfwood one w the silly blue sky bg .. the textures were so mindless and fun #or the elendira . SOOO MANY FUN ELENDIRAS.. the perspective nail gun one is still a fav bc i shy away from perspective bc its hard as shit #but it worked out and i luv it tew .#sory anyways . very happy. and thankful^__^ ik when j post stuff like URRG MY ART!!!it mostly jst comes from .like GAAH want 2 push myself #harder bc i know itll be fun once i get 2 where im going T_T #anyways if u got 2 this point u r lkterally angel my angelll~ hamtaro pic #tys

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shoechoe · 11 months

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Ghiaccio's White Album is probably a really convenient Stand to have around with Grateful Dead. I imagine he could keep the rest of the group from aging so it can specifically kill the target while keeping the members of La Squadra safe from harm's way. (I kinda wonder what the Grateful Dead fight would've looked like with Ghiaccio there or what missions would look like with him and Prosciutto paired up instead. There would be no need for the freakout over losing ice cubes and Bruno's group would probably try to use the freezing ability as refuge only for Ghiaccio to go "Ha! No, sucker!" and reverse the effect or just start freezing them to death or something)

#rambles #short posts #i complain about VA's writing a lot but i will say i genuinely enjoy the stand abilities and fights (besides the final fight but yknow)#stand abilities evolve a lot throughout the series. in part 3 they were very simplistic and kind of dull/forgettable #you can tell the series was still working out stand logic and what it wanted to do with them #parts 6 and 7 are kind of mixed bags for me- some abilities are cool and others just got weird #(complicated abilities can make for cool fights but IMO if you need several pages of exposition to make the power sensical...#it's probably not a very good power)#and i'd say part 8 missed more than it hit when it came to stands. some of them were cool but others were overly complex to the point-#-of looping back around to being boring and just making me want to skim the fight to the end #but parts 4 & 5 hit a sweet spot of just unique enough to be very jojo and make for some cool fights but also understandable and fun #i remember when i first watched part 5 and thought ''cool!!'' to myself when i saw the abilities and how they were used #you did have the whole problem with king crimson being confusing and all but that's not really a problem with the ability itself #more the fact that it was hard to communicate its ability via manga format which i could do a whole ramble about tbh sdjfksld #though some descriptions of KC get contradictory to how it behaves in-universe which is annoying #and also it was too powerful for the characters to defeat which is why the requiem stuff had to happen which is really annoying #but umm i digress

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crescentfool · 6 months

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i'm a little late (oopsies) buuuut if you're still answering 'em, 6 and 14 for the artist asks? ehehe

hi misty!! thank you for stopping by with the artist asks, i'm happy to answer them!

6. Anything that might inspire you subconsciously (i.e. this horse wasn’t supposed to look like the Last Unicorn but I see it)

it took me a bit to come up with an answer for this because stylistically speaking, i try to be very deliberate with what choices i want to try out and yoink from artists...

that said, i think that whenever i do any silly comics, because i'm not too well-versed in the medium, i feel like my expressions end up getting subconsciously inspired by expressions i see passed around a lot... like anya's waku waku expression or MS paint tails...

so basically memes...! im a very silly littel guy. oh and do cats count i swear my expressions are based off of meme cats sometimes.

14. Any favorite motifs

i think in most arts of mine it's very easy to see that i'm so very fond of sparkles... i can't help but insert a little ✨ into my work... i am also very fond of the moon (all phases are cool but i am most drawn to crescent and full moons). this is probably not a surprise whatsoever given that ryoji's one of my favorite characters 🤣

i think i just really like circular motifs in general too... like radial lines? concentric circle? is that what they are called? my vocabulary regarding these are a bit lackluster, so here's an example of what i mean featuring a sylvain concept from may 2023 that will probably not see the light of day </3 (this was supposed to be for his birthday) (being impaled by the lance of ruin is a great birthday gift i know)

for composition heavy things i usually enjoy integrating character motifs... whether if it's very direct (e.g. crests for fe3h characters, the moon for ryoji, water for minato), or just something that i feel reminds me of the subject matter... (i love sprinkling music notes whenever i draw ryomina i just think there's intimacy in sharing music together when you use ur headphones to isolate urself but umm thats very unrelated to this ask.)

i also really enjoy visual motifs being used to make characters look like they are being displayed in a church (see this tweet for examples of characters)... i guess you could say religious imagery? i'm very fond of the art nouveau style and i feel like i'd wanna make a few pieces like that!

#lizzy askbox #thank you for the ask!!! i had a lot of fun reflecting on these #especially number 6 given that i had to think a different angle that wasnt necessarily 'style'#i did briefly consider yosuke as an answer to number 6 (he subconsciously informs my ocs but i cannot fucking explain that #also that's writing and not necessarily drawn art #14 was also fun! it was a nice realization that maybe i would enjoy relearning about art history #ive had some art history classes in 2016 but i dont think i drew a lot at that time to incorporate what i learned from those courses #into my own works... and also thats just a long time ago that i can only remember the general gist haha #like.. relearning about art history to be able to put names to the motifs and styles that were around #i definitely know that some people are inspired by classical paintings and i think thats fucking swag #and i probably would be too if i took a look at them again!#actually the sylvain wips not that bad. maybe i should come back to it. LMAO #i think i stopped because i tried to clean it up and god forbid i clean anything up (hate that shit!!)#anyway im rambling. thank you again! i love talking about art i will still be happy to answer more of these! <3

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majimassqueaktoy · 1 year

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So apparently it was said that a lot of the team really want to do a Kenzan Kiwami. They said it would depend heavily on Ishin's success.

Yeah, I've heard that too!

#I just can't see them making the 'Haruka sells herself to a brothel as a Courtesan in training game' in 2024/5/6 #like I feel like they'd edit the story tbh bc some of this stuff is a bit HM #Like I've enjoyed watching it and visually it's a very very pretty game #Lots of vibrant reds and colours and stuff #And I really liked Ukiyo and Yoshino as well #Gorohachi is good fun #theres some other characters that are neat too and the story is interesting enough I'm just not sure #like I do be grimacing whenever its vaguely referenced that Haruka would be graduating to like Full Courtesan eventually its uncomfortable #even if its realistic to the time bc little girls very much were sold into that kind of work but that don't mean it isnt super 😬 to see yk #what i mean?#I think they should do another 1600s game but maybe do full fiction- no historical people or characters #and bring like Nishiki and shit back #Ask #anyway that has nothing to do with your ask i just went on a tangent <3

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timelord-of-the-moon · 5 months

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#IM SAD #just closed another show #i dont know if i can keep doing this #maybe its the fact that i dont have the next thing lined up?#i dont know if i SHOULD do this anymore either #wish a lot of things were differnt!!!!#becuase today was actually good! we had the show and i didnt miss any cues and during strike i talked to a lot of people #and then some cast and crew went out for mexican food and the owner of the theatre that had our show bought our diner #and then we went to a drag show which was fun! like fuck i actually was enjoying myself #the sad thing is that i dont have many days like this #like if i constantly had show days and people to talk to id be happy maybe?#but like its sad ill probably never see most of these people again #and i dont have anything lined up next like i have to edit this stupid fucking short film but after that nothing #and im not happy here i wasnt happy in California but at least i was a lot less bothered #and i definitely was not happy when i was in college but high school was worse #i just literally dont know what to do with myself #this is more than post show depression i think #i dont know if i have the heart to keep working with people and never see them again #and like i cant fucking make friends with them i literally dont know how i can barely get 3 sentences out in any conversation #nobody actually wants to be my friend #like sure work friend or someone who will do favors but not a deeper connection #why is it so hard what the fuck am i missing #like definitely there is something wrong with me social skills wise but i should have figured it out by now

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nezuscribe · 7 months

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𝐰𝐚𝐧𝐧𝐚 𝐛𝐞 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫𝐬

pairing: gojo satoru x fem!reader

summary: you find yourself in a marriage that you never wanted in the first place. your husband seems to hate you and you begin to wonder if anything you used to think of him was even true. who would have though a marriage to gojo satoru would be so difficult?

warnings: 18+ mdni, arranged marriage, misunderstandings and just not talking shit out, mentions of cheating, slight angst (with comfort), eating out (fem! receiving), fingering, gojo doesn't really know how to husband for some of it

word count: 10.9K (whoops)

note: part two is up! i really had a lot of fun writing this so reblogs and comments are always appreciated! as always, thank you to @jadeisthirsting for beta reading <3

jjk masterlist

never did you think that you’d be stuck in a marriage to a man who didn’t love you, but there’s a first for everything.

you should count yourself lucky that he’s not old and bald. he’s pretty. in fact, he’s the prettiest man you’ve ever seen. his eyes are the bluest, bluer than the sky. his hair mirrors the winter snows, and his back ripples with muscles whenever he fights.

his agility is unlike any other man. he fights swiftly and cleanly, never taking more than a couple minutes to get rid of whatever it was that stood in his way. he’s charming with his words (or so you’ve heard), and he knows how to make somebody swoon if he really wants them to.

and he seems to despise you.

you had known gojo since you were a child, the two of you running around each other's fields as you chased him with your wooden sword. you remembered watching him in training, wishing him good luck whenever he went on a hunt. you could even remember how he would stutter whenever he tried to talk, something he must have worked on because he never seemed to stutter anymore.

he was always nice to you, his cheeks rosy whenever you kissed him goodbye. he was kind back then, grinning brightly whenever he saw you.

but as time grew and you with it, and it was only a matter of years before the two of you went your separate ways. it didn’t help that once he turned thirteen he had to leave for training and fighting in whatever it was that was needed of him, but you had hoped that he would be able to write back.

you would send him letters whenever you could, it was tradition whenever the two of you were separated for too long to do so. each letter telling him about new experiences and embarrassing things that happened in your life, but he never responded. you liked to send one every week, sometimes including little tokens you thought he might enjoy. but you stopped sending them after the first two years and stopped asking about his whereabouts after three.

but you were hopeful that when you saw him that night so many months ago, he’d be civil with you. you were nervous, sure, but who could blame you? you had recently gotten news that his time to serve his clan was over and that he was finally back home. it wasn’t as though the two of you had left on bad graces, so you were hopeful that he would at least remember you. but he could barely meet your eyes whenever you tried to catch him from across the room, acting as if you had never existed.

he looked so different since the last time you had seen him. he was taller than most of the people in the room, his white hair just as bright as it used to be. he had gained muscle mass almost everywhere, and you felt yourself wondering just how much training he had to go through to look this way. you could see him talking to a girl, a smile on his face as he tilted his head to look at her better. you gave him some time to socialize, not wanting to intrude on anything.

after an hour you decided that it was long enough, and tried to weave your way through the crowd to get to him. you had tried to call out to him, waving to him despite your mother quickly shoving your hand down, saying how improper it was. he heard you and you knew that he was purposely ignoring you, so you began to feel heavy-hearted after a couple of attempts at trying to catch his attention, eventually giving up.

and now, despite you wanting to, you can’t even blame him for hating you.

ever since your mother caught you, alone with him, a man you hadn’t seen in so long, she had swiftly and promptly proposed the idea of marriage only a few days later. it was really to save face for the two families, but it helped that this marriage would unify the two clans.

you were sure he had ladies lined up to marry him, and you weren’t somebody he was actively trying to pursue. you didn’t even know if he was in love with somebody else if he shared a connection with a girl who was surely not you and cursed you for taking that away from him.

not that it mattered now.

all you wanted was to reconcile, to catch up on all the things happening in your lives. you wanted to hear all the stories he must have racked up over the years, not for this to happen. all the things he wanted for himself were ripped away because of one night from one simple act of kindness, and so you couldn’t find it in yourself to hate him for the way he acted.

you rarely come down for dinner whenever he’s there, but when you do, you feel those eyes turn icy, tracking your every movement till you sit down opposite of him. he doesn’t say much, just mutters a quiet “good evening” and you’re sure he’s only doing it so the maids don’t start to gossip.

whenever your hand brushes his you feel him snap back, flexing his hand as though your touch burned him. he rarely came by to ask you about how you felt, and so you stopped trying to act kindly towards him if he didn’t want anything to do with it.

any semblance of romance you had dreamed of as a young girl quickly dissipated when you realized your husband wanted nothing to do with you, so you didn’t try to pursue any sort of love, deciding it’d be easier if he just did his part and you did yours so the two clans wouldn’t worry.

he was always gone, which might be the best for the two of you. when he’s not training new men then he’s gone in a hunt. if he’s not in a hunt then he’s somewhere in his endless home, hiding away.

you don’t know if he does this for him, for your sake, or for everybody else.

“did you see your husband this morning?” one of your maids said excitedly as she tugged the undergarments over your raised arm, a gleeful smile on her face as she rambled about something gojo had done. you couldn’t help but return a smile of your own, although it didn’t quite meet your eyes.

“yes, briefly. he’s busy with having to worry about the feast,” which wasn’t a total lie. you’d seen him hurriedly brush past you, quickly glancing at you as if he had forgotten you were his wife. you felt your chest tighten up with the way he glanced at your hand, and then quickly left.

it was only a few nights away and you knew that it was the only buzz of news anybody seemed to talk about. unfortunately, for you, it meant having to socialize with other clans. you were fine with that aspect, you’d been doing it since you were young, but this time they had a right to be nosey. you knew there would be endless questions asked about the honeymoon stage of your marriage, to which you had no answer.

sure, you’d been making up answers to hypothetical questions, but you didn’t know what gojo would be answering with, so you were only praying some of your responses would line up.

for a night the two of you would have to pretend to be husband and wife, and while the people around you knew you were anything, you knew you had to commit to the role for the sake of you and your family’s dignity.

but all this worrying isn’t good for your head, you could already feel the pang as you squeezed your eyes to try and get rid of it. you tried to move on from your worries, going to comment on her necklace, it seemed new, but a knock interrupted you. the two of your heads popped up, looking at where the sound came from.

“come in!” you called out, buttoning up the last bits of your top as you thanked myra. she nodded, bowing as she went to open the door. you could hear her faint footsteps, not bothering to look up as she greeted the person behind. you guessed it was franchesca coming with the fabric samples.

“sir,” you heard myra say, and your head swirled around, only to see the topic of your conversation make his way into your room, excusing your maid with a swift motion of his hand. she glanced once at you and then to him, ducking her head as she left, closing the door behind her as she left you two alone.

you felt heat prickle at the back of your neck as he looked at you and then to your room. the two of you slept separately, as per your request the first night. you couldn’t bear the agonizing silence between the two of you, and he obliged.

he was dressed for sparring. he had a loose-fitting tunic on, and pants that would allow him to move freely and without constraint. it was in moments like these that you were reminded of the fact that gojo was the strongest warrior that any of the clans had seen, that the child who once splurged on sugar in his tea was capable (and has done so before) of taking down entire armies.

he had matured so much since what you last remembered from him. he no longer acted rashly nor spoke without thinking about what it was he wanted to say. but you still saw him eating sweets with the same fervor he did as a kid, and it never failed to make you smile, hiding it behind your hand so nobody could hear your quiet giggle.

it had been a while since it was just the two of you, alone, and all you could think about was that night. your cheeks heated up just thinking about it, and it seemed that gojo could tell your discomfort with the way he cleared his throat, running a hand through his hair as he began to speak.

“good morning,” he started, his eyes darting around, never setting on yours. it was funny if it didn’t cause your heart to hurt irrevocably, at how the strongest warrior in all the land could barely look at his wife.

if only you knew.

“good morning.” you offered him a quick, disingenuous smile, moving around until you found your vanity, rummaging through your laid-out earrings as you kept your back to him, not trusting your face to give you away if you were to look at him for too long.

you heard him take in an audible breath, but he continued whatever it was he wanted to say.

“with the feast coming up, i want to clear some things with you,” you turned around, looping the earrings in as you nodded for him to continue. it was such a shame he was so stunning, effortlessly attractive as the sun caught off his cheekbones, bouncing off of his chest. he rested his hand on the hilt of his sword, and you wondered if being here was just as painfully awkward for him as it was for you.

“we should act like we’re…” he trailed off and you felt yourself itching to leave, knowing what he meant without having to say it.

“in love?” you finished and he slowly nodded, gnawing on his lip as you brushed past him, going to find the mirror so you could adjust your jewelry. you could see him fidgeting in the corner, and for once you could see a hint of nervousness and unease on his features.

and a part of you hurt. you would never admit out loud that you harbored a crush on him for as long as you could remember. it hurt knowing that you acting like you were in love was perhaps the lost genuine form of love you could show.

“what if they ask about the night we met?” you ask after a couple of seconds, looking up from what you were doing. deep down, you knew somebody was bound to ask. even if it was just your mother who had caught the two of you alone in that garden, the news of it somehow spread (she was always one to talk).

he scratches his head, shrugging as he eventually settles on an idea.

“just tell them the truth.”

the truth.

tell them how he followed you after you had run outside, sick to your stomach after a man, who was as old as your father, had introduced himself as a possible suitor. how gojo, the most ruthless warrior in all the land, had carefully put his hands on your back as you retched, offering you a towel he had fetched from inside to clean yourself up.

tell them how you hadn’t seen him in years but the first thing you had done was to hug him tightly. how his hands wrapped around your back as though they were the only things keeping you afloat. perhaps they were.

tell them how he murmured words in your hair to bring you back to reality, his thumb running up and down your arms to calm you down. how it seemed like even though it had been years since you two last saw each other, it felt so right, so normal, to be back in his arms.

tell them how he had looked at you with such worry, such care, unlike anybody else had looked at you, and you for once felt safe in somebody’s arms.

tell them how your mother found you two in such a compromising position, with your head nestled in his chest as he tried his very best to soothe your cries. it was humiliating and embarrassing to be caught with a man you had only seen back in your teenage years, and especially so in such a vulnerable position.

you shake your head, scoffing at the idea, “i’ll just come up with something,” was your answer and he nods along, realizing how the story would be too private to share with people you barely knew.

“and we need a reason for why,” he cleared his throat once again, pink dusting on his cheeks as his eyes dropped to your stomach. your eyes met his in the mirror, and one of your eyebrows raised, “well, you’re not exactly looking like you’re carrying a child at the moment.”

you quickly looked away, the tension in the room increasing as you moved away from the mirror, doing anything you could to keep your hands occupied. you flushed at the comment, your throat drying up as you glanced at your stomach.

the two of you have barely touched, much less been intimate with each other. you were glad he hadn’t forced the idea onto you, instead, leaving it to you to bring up the topic. you only talked about it, once, the night of the marriage, and then never again. you knew that it would have to happen eventually, but you couldn’t do it right now, not with your state of mind.

you scrambled to say something. in all honesty, you had been dreading this question. you hadn’t been answering any of the letters your mother sent, and you knew people were expecting to hear the news of a pregnancy.

“we’ll just say we’ve been so busy and preoccupied with the politics of marriage that we couldn’t… consummate.” you offered and he just shook his head, pinching the bridge of his nose as if this was the biggest inconvenience to him.

you knew that this marriage was brought upon quickly and before either of you could object to it, but at least you tried to hide it away. if only he hadn’t acted so rashly that night, his hands on your shoulders, eyes bewildered as they racked over your figure. if only he had been more careful, or you were smarter in picking some place to be more concealed, you wouldn’t be put in this position.

but neither of you was thinking ahead, and here you were. but he was certainly making sure that you knew of his contempt for this arrangement far more than you were. it was irritating, it scratched at your skin and ate away at your mind the more you saw each other.

“look,” he couldn’t take his eyes off of you, off of the way you were fiddling with the ring he had delicately placed on your hand so many weeks ago, “i can come up with whatever they ask, so just try your best to do the same.” you say, your voice tinged with anger, the ring on your finger acting as an anchor to the depths of the sea with the way it weighed down your movements, feeling your chest swell as he stayed silent, watching you as you opened the door.

“i don’t-”

“um, i won’t be joining you for dinner, so don’t wait on me…i apologize, i need to work on some things for the feast…have a good day.” you swiftly murmured, shutting him in your own room as you left, your heart thumping erratically in your chest as you almost ran down the hallway.

you had no idea how you were going to persuade the masses that this marriage was working if you couldn’t even persuade yourself.

---

the feast of clans came earlier than you expected.

you found yourself perched at the end of the table, gojo next to you, your stiff bodies mirroring each other as the people around you joyously helped themselves to the vast variety of food offered.

you could barely touch the meal in front of you, your stomach churning uncomfortably with the sheer number of people that surrounded you. back home, you hated these feasts, opting to leave after a couple of bites and finish the rest of what you could pocket in your room, but here, as the clan leader's wife, you had no such luxury.

“are you not hungry?” you looked to your side, gojo staring at your plate and then to you, his eyes squinting as he tried to decipher what you were feeling.

“i can’t eat,” you murmured, playing with your utensils as you swallowed thickly, “i don’t do well in large crowds.”

he nodded once, looking out into the sea of bodies as he inched a little bit closer to you. he was donned in expensive fabrics, although his hair still messily fell all over. the candle that was lit in front of you had different hues of oranges and reds bouncing off of his pale skin, and if you didn’t know any better, the blush on his nose and cheeks could have been from the frigid winds from outside.

“i’ll have myra save you a plate,” he said, giving you a curt smile as he went back to eating.

you were momentarily taken aback by his comment, but tried not to show it, going back to fidgeting with your ring as you looked at the sea of people. nobody had thankfully come up to you and bombarded you with questions, but that didn’t mean that it wasn’t going to eventually happen.

“thank you,” you say, glancing at him and then back to your plate.

“anything for my wife,” he replies. it’s only for show, you remind yourself, after all, when was the last time he referred to you as such?

“gojo,” an old man had walked up to your table, his face lined with wrinkles and a beard, dressed in orange as he offered gojo his hand to shake, “i’m glad to see that you finally settled down.”

gojo blushed deeply, trying to offer him a smile as he motioned to you.

“it’s hard to resist marriage when such a woman offers it.” he says, and you feel your eyes widen as you try to laugh off his statement.

“yes,” the old man chuckles, eyeing the two of you. he looked familiar, and you were sure you had seen him around these sorts of gatherings before, “it was only a matter of time before it happened. we all knew just how much you liked her back when you were children.”

the two of you sputtered on your coughs, and you felt a little smile grow on your face as gojo did what he could to usher the man away.

you could tell with the way he shifted uncomfortably in his seat that gojo wasn’t expecting that, and before you could realize what you were doing you found yourself talking.

“i’m not a fan of feasts.” you quickly said, the words tumbling out of your mouth before you could stop them. it’s not like you felt you owed him an explanation, but you said it regardless.

gojo looked up from his plate, grabbing his cup so he could wash down his bite.

“any feast?” he asked, and you could feel the way the air shifted. he was glad you brought up a different topic.

“one’s as big as this,” you twisted your ring back and forth on your finger subconsciously, “i get nervous in big crowds.”

“i remember,” a small smile grew on his face as he thought back to when the two of you were children, “you would hide under the tables and force me to come with you.”

you chuckled, blood rushing to your ears at the fact that he remembered this about you. it was the bare minimum of what you remembered from him, but you had convinced yourself that he had washed every memory of your last selves from his mind.

a rush of distant memories came to your head; nights spent under the tables, laughing as you two tried to keep your voices down as you tried to dodge the feet. you could still hear his whispers of staying quiet, trying to sneak out so he could smuggle in some pastries for you to eat.

“the adults scared me; they were always loud and insistent on asking personal questions.”

“like they are now?” he replied back, a tilt in his voice as you nodded feverishly.

“yes!” you covered your mouth with your hand as you let out a laugh, a genuine one as you tried to look as put together as you could, “i swear, it’s even worse than when we were young. just the other day a wet nurse came to me and told me the best positions to get into when giving birth!” it really was a mortifying moment, your eyes darting all around as the old lady even took it upon herself to demonstrate the movements, but gojo didn’t seem to mind, laughing along with you. his eyes twinkled as they took in your giggly state, years since he had last seen you like this.

“i feel like i should apologize,” he starts, having to cover his own infectious smile as he ducks down his head in shame, “i had her sent up to your chambers.”

your mouth dropped open in shock, lightly smacking his arm as he grinned at the look on your face.

“to mortify me so that i would never leave?” your thumb moves your ring back and forth and gojo watches you as you do it.

“you seemed sick at breakfast, but i guess she thought it was a different sort of sickness.” gojo tells you as he cuts off some of his meat, not knowing just how much his words affected you.

you had forgotten how simple and easy conversations were with gojo. although this was under a guise to fool people, you felt at ease with him, as if you didn’t have to be on guard with your emotions when he was around.

“do you still want to hide under the table now?” he asked a couple of seconds later, chewing on a potato as you shrugged, looking around before your lips grew into an apologetic smile.

“…yes,” you admitted bashfully and he smiled at your honest response.

“if you want to hide, i’ll-”

“satoru!” a booming voice interrupted your endless spiral of thoughts as the two of you glanced upwards at the sound, “it’s been too long!”

a man with hair as dark as night and a smile wider than any ocean had come up to your table. he was the first one to do so all night, but gojo didn’t seem bothered by it. he seemed to smile, crescents forming around his eyes as he took his friend's hand.

“too long,” he emphasized with a charming grin, motioning to you and then back to the man in front of you as if he suddenly remembered the two of you and never met, “suguru, this is my wife, y/n. y/n, this is one of my oldest friends.”

you extended your hand outwards and the man, suguru, took it, placing a soft kiss on the back of it as he shot you a playful smile. he wasn’t at the wedding, but then yet again, it was a rather quick one. the only people who had attended were your families.

“it’s a pleasure to meet you.” he greeted, and you nodded in agreement, sitting back down next to gojo. you felt his long fingers reach for yours, enveloping your hand in his as your heart sputtered at the touch.

“likewise,” you answered and the man grinned politely before he slightly tilted his head, looking at the two of you sitting next to each other.

“he’s not bothering you, is he? i know satoru can be fiendish when he wants to be, so call for me and i’ll take care of him.” he teased and you could only smile tightly and laugh along, gojo’s fingers slightly tightening around yours as he moved your hand to rest on his thigh.

“i can take care of him when he’s fiendish. i just have to take the sugar away, right?” suguru snorted and gojo glared, but it was playful the way he looked at you.

his hands were warmer than you would have expected. you could feel the indents of calluses on his fingertips, could feel his thumb moving back and forth on your skin in a calming sort of manner. he didn’t look over at you as he did it, playing it off as second nature.

“i apologize for not having much time to get to know you, but i have something i need to talk to gojo about. would you mind? it will only take a minute?” he asked, and gojo let go of your hand at the time of his friend's voice. you had to control your urge to roll your eyes, shifting in your seat as you motioned for suguru to talk to your husband, watching as he stood from his seat, leaving with the man as they went somewhere a little more secluded.

you watched as gojo leaned down to hear whatever it was that suguru was whispering in his ear, pulling back with a frown on his face. he snapped something that only caused suguru to reel back, cast a quick glance at you, and then shake his head in clear annoyance.

you saw gojo look up, his eyes landing on somebody from across the room, and you followed his stare, only to land on a girl.

she wore a dark yellow tunic and skirt, colors from a neighboring clan. you hadn’t seen her before, but that didn’t mean she wasn’t known. just one look at the men surrounding her and you could pick up on their lovesick expressions.

she motioned for gojo to come to her with a bend of her finger, slyly brushing her hair out of her face to make it look as though it was nothing, exiting from the dining area and vanishing into one of the halls.

you looked down in case either of the men glanced over to see if you were staring. your eyes pierced through the meat on your plate, bile rising up your throat.

you gave yourself some time, counting up to a minute before you looked back to where suguru and gojo were, finding suguru standing alone. you looked at where the girl was and saw a flash of white hair before it disappeared, your heart sinking as you glanced back at suguru, only to find him looking at you.

you looked back at your plate, picking up a knife and fork as you stabbed the meat. you couldn’t keep anything down but it’s best to pretend.

---

gojo didn’t return until half an hour later, and you refused to talk to him.

“did anybody bombast you with questions?” he teased, his smile not quite reaching his eyes. he didn’t seem to pick up on your darkened mood as your fingers dug into your dress.

“i had a woman ask me if you had disappeared with your mistress, but that was it.” you remarked, silence filling the void between the two of you and you realized that all you had thought of him was crumbling down.

you didn’t care for your image anymore, giving curt answers to any questions somebody had asked. you could feel his stare on the side of your face but you didn’t humor him in looking over, focusing on your plate instead.

so what if he was seeing somebody else? you would have been naive to think that he wouldn’t wander. the two of you barely touched each other.

once all the guests had left over the course of the following days, you did everything you could to steer away from gojo.

you no longer came down for breakfast or dinner, choosing to eat in your own quarters. if he wanted to have his own secrets, he could do whatever he pleased.

though you rarely saw suguru after the feast, he did try to talk to you the morning after it took place. he cornered you after you had left from breakfast, his once playful demeanor turned serious as you tried your best to end the conversation.

“what you saw last night-”

“is none of my business,” you finished, raising your hand as you cut him off, “if gojo has his own private matters to deal with, i’m indifferent to them all.”

“you know that’s not what it was.” his hand hovered over your arm, careful not to touch you but not wanting you to leave either.

“i ruined his life, didn’t i?” you tilted your head a bit in questioning. after all, that’s all you could hear from the women who gossiped as they folded the laundry, or behind the hands of the girls who watched you and gojo interact and the mothers who wanted their daughters to be set up with him only sneered at you from across the tables.

“you…where’d you get that from?” his brows scrunched together in confusion as you scoffed, hoping he couldn’t see the tears welling in the corner of your eyes at the sting of your own words.

“i can see it on his face. if gojo wants to have his own affairs, he can have them. it’s not like we’re in love. hopefully, i find my own way out so that the two of us look happier and this marriage looks somewhat presentable to the public.”

you didn’t want to see the look on his face, but you’re sure he reported this all back to gojo because he didn’t look at you once after it.

you heard from a maid a week later that he was gone for another meeting with a clan, a southern one from what you picked up, and that you should probably go and wish him some luck.

leading up to the night of his departure you anxiously paced around your room, your feet padding on the floor as your nightgown swished behind you.

you hadn’t talked to gojo at all that day, and purposefully so.

it was petty, you know it was, to not want to see him, but a part of you still aches when you look back on that night. at how he didn’t explain where he was even after you asked, at how it was suguru he had sent to fix his dirty work for him.

“y/n?” a muffled voice came from outside your door.

your head shot up at the familiar sound, quietly dragging yourself out from your bed as you grabbed the candle, hovering on the other side as you waited for him to say something else.

“are you awake?” you heard a soft thud from his side, almost as if his head or arm had hit the door.

you didn’t answer, still, waiting.

“i’m leaving tomorrow and i wanted to see you before i left.” your heart skipped at his words, careful not to make a sound as you near the door.

“if you’re sleeping i won’t bother you anymore but if you’re not,” you could hear the old stutter he had coming back, his words meshing together as he tried to regain control, “and you’re choosing to stay quiet, i…” he sighed, his forehead thumping down as he rested it on the door, “i wanted to apologize for the feast. i shouldn’t have left you alone, and if you’d open the door, i would explain why…” he could see the flicker of the candle from underneath the crack, and saw the way it blew away, darkness following suit.

you walked back to your bed, turning your back to the door as you set the candle down on your table.

“goodnight,” his voice was quieter than before, and you felt guilty, but pushed the bitter feeling down.

a couple of seconds later you heard him let out a sigh of defeat, his footsteps leading away from your bedroom as you curled into yourself, hoping you would let your heart stop taking control of what your head should be doing.

---

gojo didn’t return for a while, and you grew more impatient by the day.

it normally took him and his men a week at maximum, and once two had passed, you felt yourself growing uneasy.

you tried to act as passive as you could, but even myra could pick up on your growing apprehension. you have never voiced your worries over your husband before, but she knew this wasn’t like any other time.

when you went to bed, the only thing you could dream about was that night, your brain re-running the images as you tossed and turned.

“are you alright?” he asked, his hands on your elbows as you could barely speak, your blurry vision impairing your sight. you could only see a mop of white in the darkness, your stomach betraying you as you tried to keep the sick down.

“i don’t feel too good,” you mumbled, trying to put some distance between the two of you as you pushed him away, only to feel him coming closer as he placed a hand on your forehead and then to your cheeks.

“you’re burning up,” he muttered under his breath, guiding you gently so that you wouldn’t trip over your feet.

“i’m sorry, you can go back inside, i don’t want to keep you out here.” you were slurring your words as you tried not to throw up on him. you wiped at your eyes so that you could see him better, only to reel back in utter shock to see the face of your childhood friend frowning down at you.

your mouth formed in the shape of his name, going to say something else, before you hunched over, feeling his strong hands pat your back and keep the hair out of your face as you felt your world tilt on its axis.

you ate your dinner at the table, eyeing his empty seat as you tried to shove his last night out of your mind. you shouldn’t feel this way, especially about a man who feels nothing towards you, but your little heart was churning in its confines the more you let yourself think about it.

sitting in the same spot where the feast took place only brought back the venomous taste in your mouth, and so you pretended that you were back home, eating somewhere without the worry of your life weighing you down like a thousand weights on your shoulders.

myra tried her best to distract you, but she could see the distant look in your eyes, how your voice never seemed too genuine. she began to worry for you, but it seemed like your mind was fixed on one thing.

until you found yourself pacing around your room, just like you were the night you last heard of him, playing with the ring on your finger as the moon carded through your window.

“my lady,” you heard myra through the door, her voice shaky and a bit more on edge than usual, “there’s-” but before she could finish it slammed open, revealing the man you’d been biting your nails over, standing in the flesh.

his eyes were a dark blue, squinted as they looked right through you. his chest heaved as he looked like he was trying to catch his breath. you could see the streaks of blood that lined his usually clean clothes, the red that stained his cheeks and jaw.

he looked feral, and it was throwing you off balance.

“out.” he snapped at myra, and before you could scold him for his tone she fled, the door shutting roughly behind her.

the two of you could only stare at each other. you didn’t know what to think after weeks of uselessly worrying over him, not knowing about his well-being, to see him here, in front of you, but looking different than he ever had.

“are you alright?”

you could barely get it out, the works sticking on your tongue as you took a tentative step forward, not knowing what to do with his state of being.

he eyed the blood on his shirt, wiping at his cheeks as if he had forgotten it was there. he didn’t look too dirty, less dirty than one would expect from a five week endeavor through the woods, but he didn’t look too good either.

“you were awake.” is all he says, his chest still moving up and down as though he couldn’t breathe properly.

“that night i came by, you were awake. i saw your candle, i heard your footsteps.” he says this as though it’s fighting its way out of his mouth as if it’s all he could think about to tell you.

“i,” you pretend that you don’t care, shrugging, “i wasn’t up to talk.”

“you were with suguru.” he snaps, his tone shocking you, and he steps back as if he had shocked himself. he jammed his palms into his eyes, tilting his head upwards before he looked back at you.

“for five weeks you were all i could think about. i wanted to come back, i wanted to tell you what i felt but we kept running into issues with other tribes and clans.”

“what could you possibly think about that occupied your mind for five weeks?” you so desperately wanted your voice to come out strong but it sounded weak, as though you were hanging off of his every syllable.

“you had told suguru that you were going to find your…own way out,” he took a step forward, and here you could see the scratches on his chest, the cuts on his arms, “i was praying to every god there was that you hadn’t found somebody in these past weeks, that you hadn’t…”

you could barely believe his words, not knowing if you should feel offended, shocked, worried, or a mix of all those three.

“what business would it be to you if i did?” you hate that this was the response you settled on. hurt flashed across his face but he tried to regain his composure.

“you are my wife-”

“and you are my husband!” you snapped and watched as he was momentarily taken aback by your outburst, but you continued your nose flaring, “you cannot argue with me on this when you left with some girl in the middle of our feast!” you felt all your emotions finally pouring out and you had no control over them, “everybody was talking about it, everybody was looking at me in pity!” your voice cracked, tears poking at your eyes as you pointed an accusatory finger at him.

gojo looked down, running a hand through his hair as he pointed a finger back.

“if you had let me explain myself, you would have known that she was trying to do what you thought she was. i left as quickly as i could but you would barely look at me!” you wanted to rip your hair out, cursing yourself for ever feeling any sort of worry for this man.

“i know that this marriage was the last thing you wanted but at least you could play the part of a husband! you didn’t send a single note, anything to tell us that you were okay, that you were alive!” you heaved, fidgeting with your ring as you wiped at your cheeks, “and you come back here accusing me of adultery? all everybody could talk about was the fact that you were warming somebody else’s bed! they said a meeting never takes this long unless something…somebody else comes up.” your voice wobbles at the end, and you find yourself furiously rubbing your tears away, hiding your sniffing as though that would do anything.

he paused upon seeing you cry, his face falling as he tried to step forward but you angled yourself away from him, hoping he’d get the hint.

he wanted to hold you, to tell you that all the rumors you were hearing were false and that the only room he had left in his heart was for you. but he couldn’t blame you for feeling or thinking this way. hell, he was so sure that he’d open the door to find another man comforting you that he didn’t even stop to consider what must have been going through your head all these weeks.

“one of the clans tried to attack us, and we weren’t ready for it. that is why we took so long.”

you sniffle again, not caring for his explanation although it did soothe a part of your past self.

“you could have at least sent a letter telling me what happened,” you fidget with your ring, your thumb running over the diamond, “everybody asked me questions that i should have had answers to, but i had no idea where you were or what you were doing…” he nods, his lips pressed into a thin line as he agreed with you.

“you're right,” his voice was thick with emotion, the words slurring in his mouth as he found himself anchored in place, not knowing what to do. but you were rambling, your thoughts going on and on and you couldn’t stop yourself.

“…but i know you don’t like letters, so the least you could have done was send a parchment saying i’m alive or something like that.” you rub at your nose again, feeling like all the weeks of worry we’re coming to a standpoint.

he looked confused now, if anything, and scratched at his jaw.

“what do you mean?”

you scoff at the audacity, rolling your eyes as you feel anger prickle at your skin.

“you never once responded to any of my letters. in my eyes, that must mean you have some sort-”

“letters? what letters?”

you glance at him, taking in his shaking form.

“come on gojo,” you feel embarrassed as he urges you to speak, having to spell it out for him, his eyes pleading with you to continue, “the ones from when you left for training.”

his mouth opens and then closes, looks at the ground and then back up to you as he shakes his head. you could hear your fireplace crackling in the background. the only sounds circling the room were the pops of ember and your breathing.

“i…” he feels like there’s cotton in his mouth, hoping that you’re lying, “i never got any letters.”

the fire crackled once again and you could almost hear a pin drop as you shook your head vehemently at his statement.

“n-no, no you did. i wrote to you every week, i sent one every week for two years and you never responded and my mother said that you must have forgotten about me…” and you trail off, the tears in your eyes stoning as he furiously wipes at his own eyes, and for the first time since you had seen him fall down when he was a kid, you saw his own tears staining his cheeks.

“nobody gave me your letters. i thought that you,” he takes a deep breath, tongue poking inside his cheek as he tried to control himself, “i thought that you didn’t care for me anymore.”

you hug your midsection, your emotions running wild at his words.

“i was under the impression that you hated me.” you admit, and he looks as though you stabbed him through the heart. if only others could see the powerful warrior now, stripped bare to his conscience and all he could think about was you.

“why…why would you think such a thing?” you two inch closer without knowing it, longing to touch each other, wanting to know that the other was really there and that this wasn’t a figment of your imaginations.

“gojo, you could barely looked at me that night at the gala and now it seems as though you, well, look at you - you’re flushed!” you’re grasping at straws, motioning towards his face, twinged with pink as you rub at your nose, “you seem angry whenever i am near-”

“the only person i am angry at is myself.” gojo whispers, but his voice echoed around the expanse of your skull.

“yes, i’m aware,” you feel cold despite the fire in the corner, your tone carrying an air of know as you scorn, “i know the last thing you expected by comforting me was a marriage but-”

“you think i am angry because i married you?” he was moving closer, his hands shaking, his eyes wet. you could see the ring on his finger glow in the dim light of the fireplace, how it shined brighter than any of the night skies, “the only good thing that has happened to me these last few months was being able to introduce myself as your husband. i know that i stripped you bare of any love you may have had for any other man, but call me selfish for feeling glad that i did.”

you could barely focus on what was happening, his words sinking deep into your skin, going to your bones.

“i told myself that you had forgotten about me those years i left. when i saw you that night i was so sure you had come with the intention of finding a suitor that i didn’t want to distract you, but then i saw that man come up to you…” and he couldn’t finish, choking on his words as he stuttered, and you saw a glimpse of the boy you had fallen in love with so long ago.

“and i followed you out. if i knew that simply being alone with you would have gotten me married to you then i would have cornered you in a closet the moment i saw you enter the dining hall.”

a tear rolls down your chin, splattering on the ground beneath you as you struggle to make sense of what he was saying. it felt as though the months of being married to him were weeks spent pacing around your own rooms, thinking the same worried thoughts, and not having the strength to confront each other about it.

“you…you don’t hate me?” your voice is timid, almost not believing yourself as the statement tumbled out. gojo had the audacity to laugh a bit, shaking his head as strands of his hair fell into his face.

“my every waking moment is spent thinking of you. when i was in training, you were all i could dream about, hoping that when i’d come home i could finally have you to myself.

“you have control over my emotions, my mind, my soul, and i cursed myself for taking away your options for a husband, but the only thing i’ve wanted to do these past few weeks was to hold you in my arms. to tell you just how deeply i yearn for your love back.”

he wiped at his cheeks, glistening in the faint light. he looked angelic, despite the grime and blood that decorated his clothing. you didn’t want to think about the men he had killed just to come back, to come back to you, and the thought of ever losing him hurt you more than when you spent nights wondering why he never responded to any of your letters.

you couldn’t stop your feet from leading you toward him, and you could only watch as he met you in the middle, catching you with all his strength, holding you as if you weighed nothing, and it only took a few seconds before your lips collided.

it was rushed, and messy as you felt his hands holding you as if you carried the weight of the universe. your teeth clashed, your tears staining each other's skin as your hands gripped at his hair, using it for leverage as he slipped his tongue into your mouth, enjoying the whimper that escaped your lips when he nipped at yours.

it was what years of longing and desperation felt like. how it felt like you two just molded into each other as if your bodies were cut out with the other in mind. you felt like your heart was about to stop beating, and you knew gojo felt the same with the way he’d whine against your lips, wanting you more than you could have ever imagined.

“we’ve been stupid people, haven’t we?” you whispered as you pulled away, trying to catch your breath as he smiled against you. if only you knew just how much he’d been wanting to kiss you like this, to see your swollen lips as you looked at him from beneath your eyelashes. you were his venus, his only saving grace, and he could only vex himself for ever making you feel anything but love.

“very, “ he pressed a kiss to the corner of your eyes, “very,” to your nose, “stupid,” his lips were on your cheeks, feeling like he was breathing in new air at the sound of your laughter, “people.” he pressed his lips to yours again, cherishing in the way you whined at the harshness.

he had spent months convincing himself that you no longer cared for him. weeks of perilous training to only come back to a bed and dream of a girl who didn’t share his emotions when in reality you did. he wants to track down the letters you had sent him, to read every word carefully, as if each sentence carried its own riddle inside of it. he wanted to apologize for never having the honor of experiencing your skilled penmanship, for leading you to believe that he had simply forgotten about you.

“gojo,” your fingers curl in his tunic, your heat transferring, trying to be rational in such an irrational state of being, “you’re bleeding, i should call for the doctor.” he didn’t stop kissing your face, moving to your jaw as he smiled hearing you shudder.

“it’s not my blood,” he murmured and you wanted to smack him for how cocky he sounded, “and don’t call me gojo.” he nipped at your lips again.

“husband?” you found yourself smiling at the title, but he shook his head. you saw how he was trying to hide his own grin.

“sire?” you tested it out teasingly, hating how it sounded. he seemed to agree with the way he grimaced at the name.

“my lord?” he wanted to bottle up your laughter forever, knowing he could get drunk off of the sound. his nose nudged up at your jaw, pressing wet kisses wherever he could.

“hmm, what about my liege?” you're curling a strand of his hair around your fingers letting him settle you down on your vanity as you spread your legs so he could slot between them.

“my men call me that.” he says, cringing as it falls off your mouth. you pretend to think, not knowing how you were able to live without this banter for as long as you did.

“satoru?” you felt breathless saying it after so long. but he still didn’t seem to find it satisfactory enough, a pout on his lips as he wanted you to find a better one.

“close, but only when you’re angry with me.” you tuck that information in the back of your mind for if you ever need to scold him, your cheeks flushed as he interlocks his fingers through yours.

“‘toru…?” his lips broke into a giddy smile, and you had to control yourself as he swooped back in for a kiss. his eyes were so much softer when he laughed, the kind ones you fell in love with so many nights ago.

“there it is,” his voice was husky, raw as your fingers gripped at the baby hairs at his nape. he was taking your air away with him and you couldn’t find it in yourself to fight back for it.

“i forgot how cheeky you can be,” you bite your lip to keep the moans inside, feeling feverish as his tongue ran over his love marks, not knowing what to do yourself as you scrambled to grab onto something to keep you afloat.

“you have no idea how much self-control it’s taken not to ravage you,” his breath is hot on your skin, and he’s tugging at your shirt, fingers slightly brushing upon your breasts, “every night you’d come down for dinner i wanted something different to eat.”

“stoppp,” you mewled, not used to this. he chuckles as his slender fingers work to untie the knot keeping you together, tugging at the string until it falls, revealing your naked chest, heaving as the fabric pooled at your hips.

you wanted to cover yourself up under his heavy gaze, to take the fabric and hide, but you felt pierced by his stare. his eyes darted to yours as if checking to see if you were okay. when you gave him a timid nod, it seemed as though it prompted him to finally move.

his fingers were gentle as they ran across your waist, large as they covered the soft of your stomach, eager as they went upwards. he looked like he was crazed and starved, as if you were his last meal and he couldn’t wait for the sweetness death would give.

your breath stuttered as his fingers found your mounds, rubbing a soothing thumb over your nipples as his pupils grew. he was eager as he flicked them over and over, a cheshire grin growing as they hardened under his touch.

“you’re perfect,” he murmured, dropping down so he could suckle at your tits, his spit shining in the light of the fire, and you tilted your head back, soft moans escaping as his tongue drew circles around your buds.

“f-fuck, ‘toru, that’s,” you couldn’t even finish your sentence, his second hand coming to cup your other tit, not wanting to leave her unattended as he sucked and bruised, wanting to forever leave his mark on your untainted skin.

“good?” he’s so cocky, and you want to smack the smug smirk off his devilishly handsome face.

his knee is purposefully rubbing against your clothed clit, and you feel yourself subconsciously rubbing yourself against it. you hope that he can’t feel how drenched you are from him just sucking your tits, but he pinches you, pressing his tongue flat against your skin as he looks up through his lashes.

“horny from just me touching you?” he’s teasing you, it’s so painful the way you want, need him like oxygen. you tug on his hair roughly, bringing his spit-soaked lips back to yours as you bite down on his lower one, enjoying the groan you draw out from him.

“don’t be mean ‘toru,” you taunt, and you feel him melt in your fingers, nodding to your request as he lowers himself down.

he presses wet kisses down your torso, stopping just above your hips, his fingers hooking along the rim of your underwear, being careful and slow in his movements as he waits for any objections, making sure you’re okay with this.

but you were in your own world, hitching your leg over his shoulders, drawing him in closer to you, sweat dotting your forehead as he licks a stripe over the cotton on your pussy, smiling to himself at the taste of you.

you were so sweet, sweeter than any desert he’d indulge himself on. he was sure that once he had a taste of you he’d be able to repent, to go before any god, and to tell them that you were his religion.

he had spent countless nights, tossing and turning in his bed, the only thing putting him to sleep being the idea of coming home to you. running after you that night was him running home to you, regardless of where you were. he was glad he got your hand in marriage, but if he had to, he’d wait another ten years just to hold you in his arms again.

he peels your underwear off, a string of your arousal connecting to it, and he tucks it in his pants, for safekeeping.

“you’re going to be the death of me.” he says against your heat, his nose rubbing against your clit as your eyes wring shut in pleasure. his hands grip your thighs, making sure you stay in place as he kitten licks around where you need him the most.

“don’t let…don’t let any of your enemies hear,” your voice comes out in bits, your hand resting on the back of his head as your leg tightens around him, “don’t want them to come after me or something.”

he snorts, pinching your thighs as if anybody could come within a ten feet radius of you without losing an eye.

his lips come closer to where you desperately want him, a finger prodding at your tight entrance, his tongue finding your clit as he begins to suck.

it’s all too much, the sensations far better than your own fingers have ever proved to be.

his fingers are skilled, long enough that they reach deep within you. he sinks one fully in, your walls clamping around him as he continues sucking your clit, his teeth grazing it every so often, making your head thump against the wall.

“talk to me, how do you feel?” his mouth discontented from your bud and you whine at the loss. he sinks in another finger to make up for it, but he doesn’t move them, waiting for your response.

“‘s good,” one of your hands is fisting your discarded robe, trying to hold onto your senses as you desperately nod, “don’t stop ‘toru, please,” and he obliges, loving the sounds of your begging, but loving the sound of your pleasures more.

his fingers stretch you open and you welcome the sting, your nails digging into him as you long for more.

he switches his mouth with his hand every now and then, his tongue taking the place of his fingers as it licks at you, groaning at your taste as he eats you out with his entire being, his chin shining with your essence and his spit as his thumb rubs furiously at your clit.

“mmhhh, just like that, fuck!” you’ve never heard your voice at this pitch, never knew it was possible to feel this way. his other hand reaches up to flick at your nipple, the extra sensation making white dot around your vision.

you feel yourself getting closer to the sweet release, feel your wall clamp around him even tighter as that knot in your stomach builds to a crescendo.

“come on, let go f’me, know you want to, know you can.” he spurs you on, his fingers unrelenting as they piston in and out of you, reaching that gummy spot that makes you go dumb.

“fuck, ‘toru, m’gonna, m’gonna come!” you cry out and you’re sure anybody walking past you could hear the debauchery. your thighs were starting to shake and you felt it all go black as you reached your high, your orgasm washing over you unlike anything you’ve ever felt.

you creamed around his fingers, gushing around him as you wailed out, tears dotting your eyes from the overwhelming pleasure you were feeling. you squeezed around him, wanting to never lose what this felt like, trying to catch your breath as his mouth never stopped sucking at your nub before he was sure your climax was over.

when he finally pulled away the only thing that could be heard was the two of you, trying to come back down as stupid smiles made their way onto each of your faces.

he was boyishly charming as he stood in front of you, licking yourself off of his fingers as he grinned at the taste. you couldn’t be bothered to be embarrassed after having him just between your legs, but you still felt a heat blossom in your chest.

“so…” you awkwardly start, sweat dripping down your face from just how hot the room had suddenly gotten as you avert your gaze, “what now?”

he shrugged nonchalantly, despite the fact that his heart was about to beat it’s way out of his chest. you let him pick you off of the vanity and tucked you safely away into his chest as he led you to your bed, gently setting you down in your mountain of pillows and blankets as you felt sleep etch away at you.

“i’m going to clean you up,” he pressed a kiss to your hair, smiling at the way you giddy smiled at whatever he did, a dopey grin on your face as your hand searched for his, interlocking you fingers with his as if you didn’t want to watch him go, “if you let me.”

you yawn, your head tilting as he sat down at the edge of your bed, still not letting go of your hand as your fingers run through the soft pelts beneath you.

“and what about you?” your chin points the obvious hard-on growing in his pants. he looks down as if suddenly realizing, and he plays it off by looking back up to you with a wink. you felt your mouth going dry at the size of it, not knowing if you could even be able to take something as big as that.

“for another day,” he promises, and you’re sure he’s not going to forget it. not like you want him to.

“and then?”

your question lingers in the air. you don’t want to wake up to him acting like this never happened, as if your feelings were only a figment of your wildest dreams. but his eyes hold onto yours, never letting go as he brushes some strays away from your face.

“and then i get a bigger bed for my room because there’s no way i’m letting you sleep here alone after this.” his thumb runs along the palm of your hand, his fingers tracing patterns into the soft of your legs.

“and then?”

“and then you tell me all the things i missed out on when i was gone. i’ll tell you about the time suguru shaved my head, and you’ll tell me about anything on your mind.”

“what if i run out of things to say?” sleep is overtaking your voice, and you’re already nodding off, not even truly knowing what you were asking.

“then i’ll make up stories so that you’re not bored.” he finds a clean towel, soaking it in water from a nearby pitcher as he drags it slowly across your body, as if your fragile and made of porcelain.

“how do i know you’re not a dream? you might just be,” you yawn, rubbing at your eyes as your finger traces his ring, “you might just be my own mind tricking me.” your eyes are shutting, but the teasing smile on your face never leaves.

“because a dream wouldn’t hide under a table with you if you asked.” he whispers, kissing your lips with a soft peck as he pulls the blanket over you, letting you sleep into a slumber as he crawls in next to you, holding you to his chest just as he did that night, just as he will every night from now on, and just as he longed for those nights he wished you next to him.

#gojo x reader #gojo x reader smut #gojo x you #gojo x you smut #gojo x reader angst #gojo x you angst #jujutsu kaisen x reader #jjk smut #jjk x reader #gojo satoru x reader #gojo satoru x reader smut #satoru x reader #satoru x you #gojo satoru smut #jujutsu kaisen #gojo x reader fluff #gojou x reader

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eff-plays · 8 months

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Ok so I watched the interview with Stephen Rooney, Astarion's writer, and here are some highlights. (I'm an aspiring writer and current game design student who wants to write for games so I'm sorry if some of these insights aren't as interesting to you as they are to me <3)

He calls Astarion his "horrible little vampire boy"

He loves seeing the fandom around Astarion<3

He did write other characters in the game, but mostly NPCs surrounding Astarion or his storyline, so it mostly revolved around Astarion

Astarion is not as connected to other companions/Origins as, for example, Lae'zel and Shadowheart, or Wyll and Karlach are to each other, but he is still reactive to their stories, even if it's just to stand off to the side and laugh when something terrible happens

He had a clear sense of where Astarion's story would start and end, but it got "muddy in the middle", but those are also moments where the best ideas come from

They write from the general idea that every character has one "good" and one "evil" ending, in order to give the player choice. RIP Ascendant apologists :(

According to Stephen, two of the most important aspects of Astarion's character (to keep consistent when bringing him to Idle Champions, at least) is that he enjoys violence, but is also fun about it

"He has a certain appreciation for violence, I guess? A bit of a murdery streak. [...] He's a vampire, he's all about blood, and he's all about, kind of, those darker sides of humanity. [..] But at the same time, he is ... He is really fun, he's really fun to write, he's really fun to have in your party, and it's very important for me that that is also represented."

"He's gonna stab you, but will have a smile on his face as he does it? I mean, I dunno. That's kind of him in a nutshell."

Larian would not have allowed for Astarion to be a typical brooding Dracula type, and there were scenes that were shot down for not being original enough

The main thing about Astarion was trying to get a "sense of fun." It would be easy to write a character that was very unlikable, and they absolutely did not want to do that

Rooney says Astarion is consistently terrible throughout the game and awful in a whole lot of ways, but he also needed to be charming enough that you could tolerate his presence and wanted him around

Rooney also had a lot of input on Astarion's stats (meaning the 10 Charisma is probalby 100% intentional)

He also had input on how certain lines should be delivered, even though the writers didn't directly work with voice actors

The way Astarion moves and poses is "all Neil"

Apparently, Neil Newbon worked on the character for years and Rooney did not speak to him once, though his voice work did influence how Astarion's lines were written and it became a "feedback loop" (Possible context for "ONLY SLIGHTLY, NEIL")

There were no points where a line delivery drastically changed Astarion's writing; rather it was a constant, slow evolution

However, there was one very spoilery moment where Neil gave such emotion to some "basic" lines that it fundamentally changed the scene (WHAT IS IT OMG)

It's difficult to balance approval, as you don't want to straight up write a monster. Every character needs to have some humanity in them. So if it comes to leaving the party, it needed to be the result of something central to said character. They wanted to be mindful of situations that would cause actual rifts between characters. (I assume this is why most generic disapprovals/approvals are +/- 1 or 2, while character-related ones give +/-5 or more)

However, as they don't write straight up horrible people/monsters, it doesn't come up as often as one might think.

The interviewer makes a point about how characters like Astarion and Lae'zel are good examples of how to play "evil" characters, as they are maybe not the best people but are still eager and willing to stick around the other party members

They worked to make sure the characters would work as a group, no matter the configuration of the group. The characters needed to be on the same path, even if they don't always agree or walk that path the same way.

Stephen Rooney is very proud of the "climactic" scene of Astarion's story. (AS HE SHOULD BE.) He even had to step away from the computer and have an emotional moment. Me too, man.

He's also "extremely pleased" that there's a point where you can punch Astarion in the face. "Actually, that one might be my favorite part" A MAN OF THE PEOPLE!!

Stephen Rooney's tip on what specific thing you should try out with Astarion: When he's trying to get a "sneaky nibble" at night, you should "probably" let him bite you. Way ahead of you there, sir.

No discussion about Astarion's romance unfortunately, but that's that!

#bg3 #baldur's gate 3 #astarion #anyway ... after dragon age it feels so mindblowing to have writers who aren't apologists for their characters

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emberwhite · 3 months

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I spent the last 11 months working with my illustrator, Marta, to make the children's book of my dreams. We were able to get every detail just the way I wanted, and I'm very happy with the final result. She is the best person I have ever worked with, and I mean, just look at those colors!

I wanted to tell that story of anyone's who ever felt that they didn't belong anywhere. Whether you are a nerd, autistic, queer, trans, a furry, or some combination of the above, it makes for a sad and difficult life. This isn't just my story. This is our story.

I also want to say the month following the book's launch has been very stressful. I have never done this kind of book before, and I didn't know how to get the word out about it. I do have a small publishing business and a full-time job, so I figured let's put my some money into advertising this time. Indie writers will tell you great success stories they've had using Facebook ads, so I started a page and boosting my posts.

Within a first few days, I got a lot of likes and shares and even a few people who requested the book and left great reviews for me. There were also people memeing on how the boy turns into a delicious venison steak at the end of the book. It was all in good fun, though. It honestly made made laugh. Things were great, so I made more posts and increased spending.

But somehow, someway these new posts ended up on the wrong side of the platform. Soon, we saw claims of how the book was perpetuating mental illness, of how this book goes against all of basic biology and logic, and how the lgbtq agenda was corrupting our kids.

This brought out even more people to support the book, so I just let them at it and enjoyed my time reading comments after work. A few days later, then conversation moved from politics to encouraging bullying, accusing others of abusing children, and a competition to who could post the most cruel image. They were just comments, however, and after all, people were still supporting the book.

But then the trolls started organizing. Over night, I got hit with 3 one-star reviews on Amazon. My heart stopped. If your book ever falls below a certain rating, it can be removed, and blocked, and you can receive a strike on your publishing account. All that hard work was about to be deleted, and it was all my fault for posting it in the wrong place.

I panicked, pulled all my posts, and went into hiding, hoping things would die down. I reported the reviews and so did many others, but here's the thing you might have noticed across platforms like Google and Amazon. There are community guidelines that I referenced in my email, but unless people are doing something highly illegal, things are rarely ever taken down on these massive platforms. So those reviews are still there to this day. Once again, it's my fault, and I should have seen it coming.

Luckily, the harassment stopped, and the book is doing better now, at least in the US. The overall rating is still rickety in Europe, Canada, and Australia, so any reviews there help me out quite a lot. I'm currently looking for a new home to post about the book and talk about everything that went into it. I also love to talk about all things books if you ever want to chat. Maybe I'll post a selfie one day, too. Otherwise, the book is still on Amazon, and the full story and illustrations are on YouTube as well if you want to read it for free.

#books #reading #childrens books #lgbtq #lgbtqia #autism #transgender #furry #therian #art #deer #queer #artists on tumblr #creativity #illustration

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mortalityplays · 29 days

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Unprintable: Artists Against Authority

I am absolutely beside myself with excitement to announce the launch of Unprintable.

Unprintable is an online free shop, where original artwork and arts resources are released into the public domain.

Everything listed here is free to use, copy and remix any way you like. You can print off hi-res artwork to decorate your apartment, or to use in your own projects. You can use the writing in your own zines, anthologies or performances. You can put it on a t-shirt. You can read it on the radio. You can paint it on a truck. It's up to you, entirely and forever.

The collection will be updated continuously, on an unfixed schedule, with contributions from a wide range of named and anonymous artists and activists. You can read the FAQ for a full rundown of what Unprintable is and why it exists, but these are the really important parts:

Can I download/print/use the work listed here? Yes. Can I use it for [X]? You can do whatever you want with it forever. But what if I want to [Y]? You can do whatever you want with it forever. Why do this? A few reasons: 1. We want a space to just share things, no strings attached. We recognise that copyright is an irrational system that was designed to protect the profit interests of publishing middlemen and IP hoarders. In fact, copyright is often weaponised against the creators it pretends to protect. As long as it exists, we are unlikely to win any other form of protection for our work, and we are profoundly limited from engaging in the kind of communal artistic and storytelling practices that were the norm around the world for thousands of years. 2. Radical art is often unprintable. Profit motives make people cautious. A lot of print-on-demand or local print shop services will refuse artwork with controversial, sensitive or political content. This is very frustrating when these themes are the focus of so much of our work (and indeed our lives). Rather than waste any more breath trying to explain why a trans artist might want to print the word ‘faggot’, we can give our work away for free. Got a printer? It’s yours. 3. It feels good. Sharing is joyful. It’s the reason we love making things in the first place. We don’t write poems because we look forward to filleting them for consumption, or layer colours so that we can sell a canvas by the ounce. We have only ever wanted to be able to support ourselves so that we can make, but that relationship is deeply dysfunctional under capitalism. We made these things, and we want you to have them. It doesn’t need to be complicated.

I'll write up some more posts introducing the launch collection soon. In the meantime...be free, enjoy, explore, have fun!

https://free.mortalityplays.com

#free art #anti copyright #public domain

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maiko-san · 3 months

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Catnap + Dogday x Reader ( Part 2 )

<<< Part 1 , Part 3 >>>

Relationship: Fluff

Character focused: Dogday, Fem! Reader

Plot : You're giving Dogday a groom after he got himself covered in mud.

A/n : I will try to include the other Smiling Critters in here, they deserve love too.

A month has passed and things went on normally with your life. All the Smiling Critters get a minor check up everyday either by you or other coworkers.

These mascots work with children 24/7, they often are climbed on, tugged around or have paints/food stuck on their fur.

"I guess that's all of it"

"Oooh! My mane looks even prettier and shiny than before!"

You just finished cleaning up Craftycorn from all the glitters and paint off her white coat and cyan hair. Which took you half an hour to clean.

You put on a pink bow on her braided mane so she looks cuter.

"I really love how you do my mane! You know, we should do this more often! You're so creative, just like ME!"

" *chuckles* I'm glad that you like it, Craftycorn but I am NOT that creative as you are"

You dismiss the unicorn and give a handful of candy for her to enjoy. You call in the other mascot and Dogday pops his head in.

The dog is covered in mud from head to toe.

"Now, what did you get yourself into this time, Dogday?"

It was the third time this week.

Dogday only looks away, both hands on his back as he kicks his feet.

"KickinChicken and I got carried away while playing football, sorry..." /he lied.

You quirk an eyebrow, you know Dogday is really bad at lying. There are no muds at the football field since the field has fake grass carpet.

You wonder where he got all the mud from....oh well.

To Dogday, he likes being around you and wants to see you everyday but the other staff members didn't let him. Not even for a bit.

So the only way for the smiling critters to see you was to getting themselves dirty, either by accident or on purpose.

For Dogday, he did it on purpose so he could see you.

You usher the mascot on to the large bathtub so you could wash him up. You run the warm water over his body and rinsing the mud from his fur.

You know that they can clean themselves up but they seem to prefer having you to clean them.

It's a lot of work to clean a two story high mascot but it's fun.

You and the smiling critters would have a conversation, sometimes the smiling critters would tell them about their days.

Like a child telling their parents what they do at school.

"How's your day at the play care today?"

"It's really fun! We do a lot of things!"

"Oh, really? Tell me all about it. I'm curious"

"We play tag, we play hide n seek, we play red light green light with everyone! It was fun!"

"Did you have fun playing football with KickinChicken?"

"Oh, yes I did! The football was fun but what's even more fun is when you play in the mud!"

"Oh, really? KickinChicken just came a few hours ago and he told me he had fun playing skateboard"

"I—"

"Ha! Gotcha!"

You smirk as Dogday hangs his head down slightly. You scrub off the dirt from his ear and tell him that it's fine if he wants to see you.

Just don't get himself dirty all the time.

"The other staffs doesn't let me see you..."

"And why is that?"

"They said you stole their work...."

"....."

Recently your coworker has been glaring behind your back, gossiping and telling you to quit your job. Saying you were proud of your work which you never at all.

It is not entirely your fault that the mascots prefer you over them.

You knew how these mascots were treated before. It was during your interview at the playcare and your manager gave you a tour around the place.

You witnessed how the maintenance workers strapped these mascots in a tiny space and treated them like a wild animal.

"It is our fault wasn't it?"

"No, it's not. I'll deal with that matter myself and it is not yours to worry, alright"

You gave the canine mascot an assuring pat on the head which he leans into and his tail wagging behind him. You continue with your work and dry him in the blower machine and then you begin to groom his fur.

You notice that his fur had gotten longer by the day, so you decide to give him a little trim.

You hold his large paw, combing out the matted fur and snip some of them so it looks neat.

You did the same thing with his ears and chests.

Dogday watches you do you work, out of all staffs in this place. You are the nicest and the most gentle out of all staffs. You never strap them down or keep them in a small cage.

You treat them like a real person.

Like they used to be.

Dogday wants more from you, he wants to feel loved by someone. Someone that cares for him and everyone's well being unlike those scientists....

You care for him, so he will do the same to you.

You are his angel, after all....

"Alright, everything's done!"

You fix his collar and give his pendant a little shine. You decide to wrap a red scarf around his neck to compliment his orange colour.

"Is this for me, angel?"

"Yeah, it suits you well"

Dogday brings you into a tight hug, with his tail wagging aggressively behind his back. It seems the canine couldn't contain his excitement.

I mean, who doesn't like gifts? Especially from someone you like!

"Thank you! I will cherish it, always!"

"You're welcome, bud"

A/n : Since the first chapter received a good amount of views, here is the second chapter for all of you, sweeties!

I will assume that Dogday is the oldest out of all Smiling Critters, maybe around 13-15. We don't have a clue who Dogday really is but I decided to make him one of the older orphans.

Also, all the Smiling Critters in my stories share sibling relationships! and the reader is their oldest sibling or maybe parent figure! ☺️

#poppy playtime x reader #poppy playtime chapter 3 #poppy playtime #dogday #dogday x reader #catnap x reader #various x reader #fluff relationship #platonic relationship #Reader is a parental figure #catnap #smiling critters #smiling critters x reader #craftycorn #bobby bearhug #bubba bubbaphant #hoppy hopscotch #kickinchicken #picky piggy

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goldenhypen · 8 months

Text

✴︎ ⎯ interrupting them with a kiss

pairing | enhypen x reader

genre | fluff

wc | 1.2k

warnings | kissing lol + some playful teasing/bickering,, lmk if there’s anything else!

a/n | first work since the hiatus omg hope y’all enjoy i haven’t done one of these in a whileee

HEESEUNG ♡

this boy is literally in the middle of answering a question YOU just asked but you can’t help but notice how ADORABLE he looks right now

wearing his oversized hoodie that engulfs his entire tall form somehow manages to make him look so tiny before you

and so you can’t just sit there and act like you’re okay

you can’t hold it in you anymore

so you kiss him

“oh…” he says, blinking at you, pleasantly surprised as you pull away. “do that again, please,” he smirks with more of a demanding voice this time

LEE HEESEUNG????

you’re left there at a loss for words at this reaction you didn’t expect to elicit from him

and so noticing you’re not doing anything, he decides to take things into his own hands

literally thanos’ “fine. i’ll do it myself” but make it intimate, sexy and lee heeseung

and you catch yourself melting under the hot touch of your boyfriend as his lips immediately find yours

JAY ♡

after kissing him all of a sudden, he lowk flinches and looks at you wide-eyed before acting like you didn’t just make his heart suddenly rush at 150 miles per hour whilst simultaneously doing hundreds of flips in his chest

he looks at you with a questioning type of look before laughing, attempting to mask his now flustered state before letting out a confused, “what the…”

“sorry, you were talking, then i realized how pretty your lips were looking as you were talking, and then you talked some more, and i—couldn’t hold back :)”

he scoffs playfully while letting his eyes shut half closed, still looking at you with an unamused (actually, very amused) stare, “so are you gonna let me finish what i was saying—”

“or should we make out for a few minutes? :D”

“y/n!”

no but after exposing him to the idea, soon the only thing leaving his lips were yours every time you had to catch your breath— (oop)

JAKE ♡

honestly,,, he’s barely taken aback??? 😭😭

like jake srsly? 😭 way to ruin the fun 🙄

nO BUT YK WHAT HAPPENS NEXT THO???

okay so you were the one messing with him, right? buT SOMEHOW BEFORE YOU KNOW IT HE’S THE ONE HAVING FUN MAKING YOU FLUSTERED DJDNDJDJ

literally turning this entire thing around like it’s some game

and so now he’s the one having you forming into a useless ball of mush as he suddenly takes hold of your face, kissing you back passionately like he thinks you can handle it or something 😭

lucky for you he’s holding you so even if every muscle in your body shuts down, having you weak under his touch, LIKE IT DOESNT FEEL LIKE IT BUT you are safe and secure with him <3

moral of the story: almost always whenever your lips meet his and you pull away, his brain just automatically takes it that he needs your lips back on his again asap and he’ll do whatever it takes to get what he wants

this boy puts a whole lot of value on the kisses he gets to share with you. sorry i don’t make the rules 🤷🏻‍♀️

SUNGHOON ♡

sunghoon is just smiling as he reminisces out loud some memories you two shared from a while back

and if you’re being honest, the moments he brought back to life through his words started to make you fall in love with him all over again

you smile ear to ear just as he is and suddenly you catch yourself staring at his lips,, maybe it was the pretty smile you were just always so attracted to…

*peck*

“hey! what was that for?!” your boyfriend exclaims, very obviously flustered by your sudden move on his lips and djdjsjsj you catch a glimpse of his cheeks growing red before he turns away to hide his cute face with his hands

is that not just the most adorablejejsjdjd

he takes a few deep breaths in to compose himself before turning back around, ready to scold you (ZJDJDJ yes hoon you go !! dhdjdj)

“y/n, you can’t just do that!”—yup, great one, hoon, keep going—“i—was talking! and that was rude to interrupt me while i was talking…yeah! and actually, i should be the one making you flustered! not the other way around!”

smoothhh

“oh, so i made you flustered then?”

“hey!—you—no! i’m just saying…”

you let out a small chuckle, “cute.”

“what did you just say?”

“i said you’re cu—“ *peck*

“park sunghoon!” you laugh, in shock

“now look who’s getting shy.”

I— ???

SUNOO ♡

when you suddenly kiss him in the middle of his long run down of the latest gossip between his peers, a gasp leaves his lips as a smile automatically graces his face

“hey!” he hides his face in his hands and chuckles unbelievably, whining playfully, “don’t do that!”

“what? you don’t like it?” you tease

“if you do that again, i’m gonna refuse to even bother talking to you. you hear me? got it?”

oh the sassy little sunoo threats

“mhm, it’s just ‘cause you wanna kiss me so bad too, huh?”

“oh my, y/n,” the boy literally face palms, sighing, “yeah, let’s continue this conversation another time.”

he’s so done (nah he actually loves playfully bickering with you) he literally begins walking off, so you shout, “so is that a yes to more kisses, or???”

“no!!!”

“are you sure??”

“ugh, fine!”

he loves you 🙄😔

JUNGWON ♡

HED GIVE YOU THE BIGGEST CUTEST PUPPY KITTY(??) EYES

like full on adoration

he doesn’t care that you just stopped and interrupted everything he was saying

he thinks it was just so cute that you kissed him like that

a smile grows on his face as he asks what that was for

and you tell him how he just looked cute and you apologize you couldn’t help yourself

and that was when he had it

and he immediately leaned in and kissed you right back

YANG JUNGWON CALM DOWN A BIT PLS ITS TOO MUCH FOR OUR WEAK YN HEARTS-

NI-KI ♡

GETS SO FLUSTERED RIGHT ON THE SPOT

right as you pull back and watch for his reaction he’s letting out a chuckle and pressing his lips together, turning his entire body to face away from your view

he’s in his own world for a moment, processing what just happened before getting flustered again and trying to calm down and compose himself

and so you try to get his attention again. you poke him a few times, “riki? riki? riki?!”

he turns around, TRYING TO ACT ALL COOL AS THOUGH HE WASNT JUST STRUCK WITH THE BIGGEST SWARM OF BUTTERFLIES IN HIS STOMACH

like riki your face is all red, you can’t hide nothin 🙄

“hm?” he asks in the most composed voice and with the calmest face he could pull off (p.s. he was not very good at acting “calm” at all whatsoever and you just couldn’t let this boy have his moment)

“you’re so red right now,” you point out and cackle

“do you wanna kiss again?”

SJSNDJ I— ???? NISHIMURA RIKI!?&@:’!

a/n | lol don’t mind if the tenses were all over the place in this one T-T i tried writing in present tense for once,, let’s hope it stayed that way throughout the whole thing djdjd ,, i hope you liked reading this one! first goldenhypen work in how many months?? hope you lovelies enjoyed !! likes and reblogs are very appreciated mwah <3

main m.list | taglist form

perm taglist 1 | @seroriis @raimbows4u @beibybtch @sultrybaby @kpop-nct @ajayke-reads @wccycc @enhacolor @enhasfever @nokacchan @yizhoutv @xiaoderrrr @soobin-chois @tyunni @shinsou-rii @softkpopplace @belle643 @nar-nia @rapmonie2047 @pshchives @sunjakes @ethereal-engene @exohclipse @yeosayang @forjaeyun @koishua @4ri-ki @sunoksunny @kookielover29 @jaeyunjakesim @whoschr @enaus @hoes4hoseok @1unxtic @palajae @clarakyunisageek @annoyingbitch83 @wonswondrland @malarign @rcrystallocks @stepout-09-15 @zeraaax @enhasengene @ktttwwn @pistachiophobia @svnoofy @sweetjaemss @vatterie @majesticallymark @mnsnts

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gimmeurtmi · 7 months

Text

kinktober day two — seungmin

pairing: kim seungmin x fem!reader

tags: established relationship, dom/sub dynamic, kinktober series, smut!!!🔞

warnings: swearing, dom!minnie, unprotected sex, oral (m receiving), grinding, themes of degradation, use of “toy”, “pretty”, “bubs”, “baby”, “good girl”, lmk if i forgot anything!

inspo: a lady never tells 😌

kink: edging <3

{ wc: 3900 }

Seungmin loves control. He loves challenging himself, he loves being the best, and he loves the thrill after a mental battle. He also really loves experimenting sexually with you.

So when he accidentally ruined one of your orgasms one night–he spent the following day reading all about the concept of that, as well as edging.

He was enthralled.

It was the most curious thing to him, people enjoying being deprived of pleasure like that, but you really seemed to like it the few times he did it to you, so Seungmin kept doing it.

But the more you enjoyed it, the more the itch at the back of his neck bothered him; what could possibly be so fun about it?

The more videos he watched about it, the more he did it to you, the more he read about it–he just couldn’t help but wonder what it felt like. However, he also couldn’t ignore the clear dynamics displayed each time he watched one of those videos.

Seungmin was in charge when it came to sex; that’s how you both liked it and that’s what worked. Seungmin knows that’s what works because you two tried it the other way around and it was… not good. It was actually pretty awful. Seungmin was uncomfortable by it, and you were nervous and apprehensive, and neither of you even managed to finish that night.

You asked him to try again and considering it came from you Seungmin agreed in an instant. And then the same thing happened. You froze, you were awkward as you kissed him, and you fumbled so much his condom slipped off after a few thrusts.

You never tried it again after that and so the dynamics remained how you both wanted them to be–Seungmin was in charge and you followed his every word flawlessly.

Edging was something doms did to their subs. That’s the conclusion Seungmin couldn’t help but reach. Every video and post and article about it all came to that same conclusion, and so Seungmin figured it wasn’t something he’d get to experience.

It was something he could do to you, feel the thrill in his gut as you whined and he watched your walls clench in frustration as he pulled his fingers away. He got to hear you beg him for more and then stop, chuckle at your annoyance when he simply told you ‘not yet’.

He did it to you a lot. The more frustrated he felt after a long day of work, the longer he’d put you through it, and every time he’d imagine how you must feel. Having the pleasure so close to you, feeling the tell-tale signs of an orgasm approaching just for it to be taken away at the very last second. He’d watch your face, your faint giggle and your frustrated eyebrows and imagine it was him feeling it, too.

Seungmin will never admit this, but he tried it on himself one night–when he was away from you and missing you. He touched himself, and rather than racing to get there as quickly as possible, he stopped himself at the very last minute. Felt the way his stomach contracted in preparation to release just for it not to come to fruition. It felt extraordinary.

It made him so needy he felt like he’d do something crazy like call you and beg to hear your voice. It made him so needy he didn’t even think about the noises he was making. It made him want in a way he’s never wanted sexually before–and he just knew he needed you with him next time.

He wanted your hands on him while it was happening, he wanted to see your smile and kiss your swollen lips as he’d wait for the rush to disappear completely and start the whole ordeal again. He wanted you to do it to him, he wanted to beg for more of it.

But doms don’t beg.

“Come here,” he groaned, pulling you onto his lap after ten minutes of kissing. You quickly climbed on top of him, sighing softly as you settled right on top of him.

He brought a hand to your hip, squeezing softly as his pinky finger dug into your bone.

You slowly moved his hair out of his eyes, softly combing your fingers through his bangs as you smiled down at him.

Fuck. You’d be the death of him one day.

“Bubs,” he said softly, voice catching on his heartbeat in a small crack. You hummed at him. “I need you.”

“What’s stopping you, then?” You giggled, dipping your head into the crook of his neck, leaving small kisses around his veins.

The grip on your hips tightens, and you understand instantly what he wants when he drags you across his lap twice. You quickly take control of the pace, rubbing against him with familiar ease.

Seungmin brings a hand into your hair–grabbing you before he crashes his lips against yours. The kiss is messy, desperate, as Seungmin licks into your mouth. You meet him halfway, sucking his lips as you let out small noises in return.

He grabs your ass firmly, controlling your movements as you let your desperation dictate the pace more than any kind of grace, and after a small shift closer, Seungmin’s head falls back.

“Fuck, that feels good,” he affirms, squeezing your ass once before pulling you even closer to him.

All you can do is nod in return as the pressure sends a small jolt between your legs–your underwear sticking to you uncomfortably.

“I wanna take this off,” you whine, grabbing the hem of your leggings and tugging.

Seungmin shakes his head. “Not yet, bubs. I want you to ruin them first.”

You moan loudly at that, breath shaking as you nod in understanding.

It only takes a few more thrusts and grunts before it hits you, Seungmin’s shameless moans spurring you on more than he could ever know. Although; he does have a very good idea of what his voice does to you, regardless of what kind of melody comes out of him.

He brings his hands to the small of your back, kissing your forehead lightly as you slowly come back down to earth.

After your breathing settles down, you bring your hand between your bodies. It’s warm and slightly uncomfortable, but you don’t care about any of that when Seungmin groans at your touch.

“I wanna, wanna try something,” he lets out, big eyes wide and cautious as he looks at you.

You nod softly at him.

“Yeah,” you agree, because you’re sure whatever it is is something you’d love to try with your boyfriend. He wouldn’t ever want to do something that isn’t fun for both of you.

“Would you wanna try edging?” He suggests, a faint blush covering his features.

You nod quickly, chuckling lightly before you say, “but we’ve done that loads of times already, Seung.”

“I mean me,” he says softly, “if that isn’t weird and you’re comfortable doing that.”

“Weird?” You all but gasp, “Seungmin, that’s hot as fuck.”

He chuckled at you, rolling his eyes as he pulls his arm around your shoulder. “You just have horny brain fog right now.”

“Yeah, it’s the kinda brain fog that makes me call you—“

“—behave,” he giggles, “I’m trying to have a serious conversation about kink right now.”

“And it’s so hot when you’re all serious about communication and boundaries,” you grin at him, leaning in closer to kiss him tightly. “I can be a good girl and do what you ask of me, baby.”

Seungmin feels his insides filling with heat as you say those words, and suddenly, his inner conflict seems to disappear altogether. It isn’t at all weird for a dom to ask for edges, because you’re the kind of sub that obeys him and follows his orders to perfection. So ordering you around to please him makes complete sense. It’s not like he’s never done that kind of thing before either, telling you how to please him, it’s just this time the pair of you will go through a whole other level of it.

Seungmin feels his dick twitch with the excitement of it all.

He should’ve talked to you about this such a long time ago. He didn’t even have to tell you he was feeling insecure about this particular exploration of his and already you’ve managed to reassure him completely of his desires. There was a reason you were the person he trusted more than anyone, enough to want to do this with you in the first place.

“I don’t think I’ll be good at it, at first,” you say, lacing your fingers with his and tapping his knuckles absentmindedly, “but if you enjoy it we’ll figure it out together. And it’s not like we need to change roles just for you to get edged.”

Seungmin hums quietly, nodding at your suggestion. He isn’t sure what it’ll feel like to still be in charge while it happens, and he wonders if he’s maybe asking too much of you. How would it even work, technically speaking?

“Oh my god,” you smile wide, “you know what’ll be super hot? If I suck you off and you like,” you grab his hand, bringing it up to the side of your head and letting his fingers dig into hair, “pulled,” you wrap your fingers around his wrist, helping him pull your hair as your head goes along with it, “and like, yank me off you when you get too close.”

Seungmin's mouth is completely dry, and the enthusiasm in your eyes isn’t helping the strain on his pants. He takes a deep breath.

“Yeah, bubs. Very hot, I can do that,” he says, breath shaking.

“Can we do it now?” You ask, eagerly, beautiful eyes shining brightly at him.

Seungmin wonders why he’s the only one with a puppy reputation in this relationship, when the only thing missing from this picture is a tail wagging wildly behind you.

He can’t help himself, bringing the hand that’s still buried into your hair closer—yanking you towards him as he kisses your lips firmly.

“You’re the best,” he mumbled against your lips, knowing how big of an understatement it actually is. It’s not enough to explain what his heart is feeling right now, but you accept it as you giggle.

“You’re only saying that because I’m about to suck your dick,” you scrunch your face up at him.

He opens his mouth to say something obnoxious, but you drown him out as you slip off his lap and tug his pants off. It’s a moment later that his cock hits the back of your throat, your enthusiasm showing tenfold as you finally see to the task at hand.

With the hand still in your hair, Seungmin rubs slow circles into your scalp and whether subconsciously or not, your tongue moves at the exact same pace. Seungmin tests out this theory, by very subtly quickening the pace of his fingers, and your mouth moves just as fast.

He chuckles at you, “God, such a good girl. Such a good girl.”

You hum happily around him, and Seungmin feels the early signs of an orgasm approaching him. The tell tale crunch in his lower stomach, and the tightening around the base, and—

“Oh, fuck,” he lets out, feeling it approaching faster and faster before he grabs your face with both hands and pulls you up.

There’s a string of spit between your lips, connecting to his dick, and Seungmin has to close his eyes not to look at it for too long. With his eyes closed he can feel everything better. The wetness on his dick is cold now that your tongue isn’t around him anymore, and the feeling sends a small gush down his spine. His whole body was prepared for it, blood rushing everywhere and thighs flexing and now he lets out a small sigh as all those feelings disappear. The only thing he can still feel is how hard he is.

He grabs you without opening his eyes, feeling around the bed for your hand before he pulls you on top of him. Your body weight grounds him, and your thighs right above his crotch make him want to thrust into you. It’s contradicting and wonderful and Seungmin feels like he’s floating.

“Gonna fuck your cunt now,” he says, his voice so foreign in his own ears. He sounds a bit breathless, and so desperate he’s almost embarrassed.

But your eyes are wide and lustful and there’s spit all around your mouth and Seungmin could just devour you right now.

“Please,” you say, grabbing his shoulders to ready yourself, mounting his thighs as you sit up.

“Look at you,” he groans, placing a hand on each thigh and squeezing tightly, “got ready so quickly. Needy for my cock now, yeah?”

You nod quickly, squeezing his shoulders as he lines up with your entrance. He lets the tip of his cock slide into you, but doesn’t go much further. You patiently wait for him to do something, admiring the way his jaw clenches while he looks at you. His eyes are darker, pupils blown out and enlarged, your body reacting instantly as you feel another wave of wetness release.

Seungmin laughs.

“I just gotta look at you and you get wet?”

His words cause you to clench before you realise it, another inch of him slipping inside you as it happens. You moan loudly.

“Fuck,” he lets out, eyes fluttering at the feeling before he lets his head fall back on the pillow. “You’re so easy.”

It happens again, another clench or your walls. Seungmin laughs again, but this time he moans as your warmth welcomes another inch of his dick.

“Not all of it,” he mumbles to himself, tapping your knee in a silent request to lift yourself up, “can’t give you my cum just yet.”

Your body shudders at that, at the simplicity in which he says something so sexual, at the way he somehow turned his own edges into your punishment.

You let yourself moan his name loudly as your head falls onto his chest.

“I want your cock, baby,” you mumble, feeling the stretch from his tip but craving the way his cock fills you up entirely.

“Can’t give you all of it,” he groans, pulling you up and down his cock slowly but never sliding in too deep. “Gonna cum if I do.”

“I want you to cum,” you whine before you can think about it. A part of you knows, remembers, that Seungmin wanted to try edging. A part of you understood that he wasn’t too confident in asking for it—even if you weren’t too sure why. And from your experience of being on the receiving end of such things, you feared your words probably weren’t helping him. Yet still, in this position, with his cock barely inside you and your walls fluttering around him in need, you didn’t know what else to say. Your brain was far too occupied by him to even think it through.

“You don’t get to decide, sweetheart,” he smiles at you, that scary smile he displays whenever he plans something slightly diabolical. “But maybe I’ll be nice if you beg for it.”

It was all a bit too familiar between the two of you; this kind of a game, and considering Seungmin’s earlier request it felt very counterproductive. But it was far beyond you to ignore his orders.

“Please, Seung,” you say, letting your weight fall ever so slightly, feeling more of him fill you up. “Please.”

“You’re better than that,” he shakes his head, pouting in slight disappointment. “You usually talk so much.”

“I want you inside me, Seung,”

“I am, though,” he flexes his stomach, his dick twitching against your walls—as if to emphasise his point.

“Deeper,” you beg, “I want you to fuck me so deep I can feel it in my tummy, please baby,”

His big hands clutch your hips, pushing you all the way down until your thighs are pressed together and he’s buried to the hilt.

“Yes, yes, yes,” you start chanting, “just like that.”

He drags you up, pulling you away from him before he slams your thighs together again. You moan his name repeatedly, all other words disappearing from your brain except yes and a few swear words.

It’s only after a particularly loud moan of yours that Seungmin yanks you away—panting as he gently places you beside him.

His eyes flutter shut, a blissful expression on his face as his dick jumps up and down once. It’s red, wet and leaking and you want so badly to see him cum.

But it was his decision to do this, and his word counts.

You can’t help the shiver running up your legs the more you replay the last few minutes in your head; the way he so roughly fucked into you, just to put you to the side once he got too close.

“You’re okay?” He asks, kissing your shoulder as he calms down.

“It feels…” you start, but the blush on your cheeks stops you. You aren’t sure if you’re brave enough to say what’s on your mind.

Seungmin hums softly, eyes slightly wider in question before he adds, “talk to me, bubs.”

“…like I’m your toy,” you say, barely audible.

“In a good way?” He asks, hesitant.

“Sooo good,” you all but moan.

Seungmin laughs at that, giggling as he pushes you on your back. He kisses your arms while he climbs on top of you, quickly sliding all the way in.

“You’re my little toy, bubs?” You clench around him at that, which causes both of you to groan. “Like being mine to fuck how I want?”

“Yes, yeah, fuck,” you moan, clinging onto his broad shoulders as he starts fucking you fast and hard.

“You’re mine to use how I want, yeah? So good baby, letting me edge with your cunt..” his words are sharp and controlled as he tries levelling his breathing enough to speak, but you almost can’t hear him over your deep moaning.

It’s only a few thrusts after that he pulls away, eyes squeezed shut before they open in complete concentration. He brings his hand to your clit, rubbing skilled circles before you cry out his name as your orgasm hits you.

He lets you breath for a few moments before he pulls you up onto his lap again, kissing you harshly.

It’s messy and desperate and wet and he groans as he pulls away.

“You’re so fucking hot when you cum,” and then he’s inside you again. He moans loudly, which isn’t what you’re used to. Seungmin is vocal, but never this much, and it makes you cum after three more seconds.

He stays completely still when he notices your walls clenching.

“Baby,” he says after a few more pants, “this feels so good. So so good, I fucking love this. I wanna keep going but I also wanna cum so fucking bad.”

You kiss his forehead lightly, soft hands on his cheek as you rub your thumb against his skin.

“I know, baby,” you try and ground him—recognising the brain fog and desperation he must be feeling. He’s seen you in this position before, put you in this position before, and having the roles reversed like this with him so clearly still calling the shots messes with your head in the best way possible.

“You’re so hot for this, you know?” You whisper against his collarbone, kissing softly.

“You’re so hot, too,” he confesses, “so warm and sexy and—“

You don’t think he notices, eyes still shut and mouth gaped, but he’s moving inside you in short shallow thrusts.

“—so fucking wet. Desperate for my cum, hmm?”

“So desperate,” you rock with him, meeting him halfway, “want you to cum all over me, baby. You’ve made me wait so long for it. I need it.”

He moans, noises loud and uncontrolled. When he opens his eyes you almost lose your mind. They’re so brown and beautiful.

“Waited so patiently, pretty. Been so good for me.” You nod quickly. “Such a good toy.”

“Your favourite toy?” You blink at him.

He wraps his arms around you, pulling you so close until there isn’t one part of your skin his isn’t touching. Your noses bump together as the pair of you move together.

“My favourite,” he whispers, like that confession is a secret you have to keep. He kisses you softly. “My absolute favourite, bubs.”

He pulls you closer, which you weren’t aware was physically possible, and starts thrusting in deeper. Harder. Slow and deep until he lets out a loud strangled moan and you feel him twitching inside you.

He buries a hand in your hair; pulling you closer as he kisses you hard and deep. He can’t focus on it too long before he leans his forehead against your cheek, panting and swearing as it hits him. One of his hands grabs tightly on your hair while the other squeezes your back. You try and help him as much as you can, keeping up the pace of his thrusts, but he just keeps cumming and you can feel it spilling and slipping inside you and the sensation pushes you over the edge too.

The combination of his long-awaited orgasm and your own sends him spiralling, and before he knows it he feels it all happening again, cumming for a second time in the span of a few minutes.

“Fuck, fuck, fuck,” he lets out, voice going higher and higher until he’s completely silent. You wrap your arms around his shoulders, letting him bury his face in your chest as a second one rushes over him.

After a few moments, he uses your hair to guide your face towards his, peppering small kisses on your lips.

“You okay, pup?” You say, softly.

“That was fucking incredible. I never came so hard in my life,” he chuckles.

“I know,” you giggle, “I’m scared to get up.”

Some of it has already started to spill down both your thighs. You’ve never felt so much inside of you before.

“Wait, wait, wait,” he pushes you closer to him with the hand on your back, “I’m not done.”

He buries his head in your collarbone, snuggling deeper into you—and you quickly adjust, bringing a hand to the top of his head to softly play with his hair. You stop only to plant a kiss in his hair and quickly get back to the task.

He pulls away enough to look at you, your current position allowing him the need to look up, his eyes big and so sweet as he smiles dumbly.

“Had fun?” You ask, softly, as to not disrupt the perfectly peaceful daze on his face.

“So much fun,” his full lips lean against yours softly.

“We can do it again, whenever you want,” you assure him. “That was all just…. yeah.”

Seungmin smiles at that, giggling softly as he nods. He didn’t need to explain much of his thoughts to you to feel understood, you just went with what he wanted and trusted him with it. As he trusts you.

“Hey, bubs?” He asks, letting you pepper a few more kisses on his cheeks before he nudges you for attention. “You really are my favourite.”

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