#and this is coming from me i am not a ‘everyone deserves kindness’ person anymore but i do believe

[marvelsmylife]

Can you feel my heart breaking? Part two

Pairing: Azriel x reader 

Plot: five months after Azriel discoveres you are his mate, the night court pays the day court a visit. What happens when Azriel discovers another male is making his intentions known that he wants to court you?

A/n I’m contemplating writing a part three (including smut) let me know if you guys are interested in it.

Part One

Acotar Masterlist

Send in Requests

It took everyone in the inner circle to physically stop Azriel from going after you when you left for the day court. After revealing that you already knew Azriel was your mate, Rhysand explained that you asked for some space. Azriel listened in horror as Rhysand detailed what you endured for the past year and a half. He couldn’t believe you bottled up all the pain you felt while you watched him love someone else.

Poor Elain started apologizing for being part of the reason you left and swore nothing ever happened between her and Azriel. Rhysand reassured her that you held no ill will towards her and you left to clear your head but that you would be back in a few months.

Rhysand begged Azriel to give you space while you process your emotions. “Rhys, please. I need to see her. I need to tell her that I know that I am her mate and that I want this mating bond.”

“No,” Rhysand said firmly: “You are also prohibited from traveling to the day court until she lets me know she’s ready”.

Azriel didn’t give up though, he sent out his spies into the day court and they gave him updates on your well-being. Every night they would report the same thing: you were fine, you were safe, and you were still staying with Helion despite your family living nearby. Over time, they would report that you were smiling more and having pleasant conversations with the people around the villages you would visit.

That brought a smile to the spymaster's face. He remembered how kind you were to everyone who crossed your path; even towards people who didn’t deserve your kindness.

One day though, one of Azriel’s spies informed him that there was a new general in the day court who had taken a liking towards you. They informed Azriel that this new general is actively seeking you out and gifting you small presents to win you over.

Panic started to take over Azriel’s body at the news. It never crossed his mind that someone else would try to court you while you were away. 

Azriel pleaded with Rhysand to visit the day court so he could see you. He told him what his spies had informed him and he was worried you might accept a courtship. Rhysand wanted to respect your wishes but he couldn’t bear to see his brother's desperate state anymore “ok, ok I’ll contact Helion and request if we can visit. But let me make one thing clear” Rhysand warned “You better hope whatever you have plan works out. I need y/n back home with us”.

Helion accepts Rhysand’s requests and extends an invitation to Rhysand and his inner circle to stay with him.

Azriel was on edge when they finally arrived at the day court and waited for you to come down and greet them. While they waited for you, Helion thanked Rhysand for sending you to him because in his words “you brought so much happiness to him and his people”.

Rhysand responded with “That’s why we love her so much. She’s like our own personal ball of sunshine. I don’t know what we would do without her.”

“You would survive” you teased and caught everyone’s attention “but it’s nice to know I make that much of an impact on you guys”.

Time seemed to stop for Azriel as he watched you make your way downstairs. That was until the unnamed general appeared by your side and whispered something in your ear. 

Jealousy surged through Azriel as he watched you playfully roll your eyes and giggle at whatever the general had said. “Control your anger,” Rhysand warned: “Do not jeopardize our alliance with the day court over his comments. Y/n has no interests in the general”.

Right at that moment you looked over at Azriel and sent him a concerning look. You were about to ask if something was wrong when Helion announced that it was time for dinner and guided everyone into the dining area.

Throughout dinner, Azriel couldn’t help but glance over at you. A smile appeared on his face as he took in your beauty. He couldn’t believe he completely overlooked you and was pining after the wrong female. He wanted to desperately tell you in front of everyone, especially in front of the general that had also been eye fucking you throughout dinner that he knew you were his mate.

He didn’t though. He knew it would be foolish to announce it in front of everyone and probably cause you to be embarrassed. He needed to do it when you were alone. 

Fortunately for him, that opportunity came sooner than he thought. “I’ll be right back, I need to use the washroom” you excused yourself and left the table. Azriel took the opportunity and excused himself as well before trailing after you.

Azriel patiently waited outside for you. His shadows went wild with excitement when you finally exited and quickly darted towards you. “Oh hello,” you squealed at the shadows running up and down your body.

“They missed you” Azriel explained and got your attention.

“Azriel” you whispered “what are you doing here? Why aren’t you eating with everyone else?”

“I needed to talk to you in private” Azriel replied and started making you feel nervous about what he might want to talk about. “Why didn’t you tell me you were my mate?” Azriel asked with desperation in his hazel eyes.

The question took you by surprise but you decided to answer it honestly: “Because you were in love with Elain,” you replied: “You were so in love that you questioned the cauldron's decision to make Lucien Elain's mate.” Azriel felt his heart stop at your explanation. He didn’t know that anyone heard his argument with Rhysand months ago about him thinking the cauldron made a mistake. “I thought if you found out I was your mate you would think the cauldron definitely made a mistake and that I was intended to be with Lucien and you with Elain. I just want you to be happy and if that means being with Elain then you have my blessing. But if you do proceed with courting her, I will be permanently moving to the day court.” You tried your hardest not to cry before continuing: “I can’t bear to be under the same roof when it happens”.

Sadness rippled through the bond and Azriel hated the fact that he was the reason behind it. “I don’t want Elain; I want you” Azriel pleaded. “I can’t live another second without you by my side.”

“It’s just the mating bond” you replied “It’ll fade away over time.”

“No it won’t” Azriel got closer and cupped your face “Do you need me to get on my knees for you? I’ll drop this instant if it means you forgive my actions. Listen, you don’t have to accept the mating bond right now if you don’t want to, but please allow me to show you how much I love you.”

Every part of you wanted to say no, you just got in a good place mentally and you didn’t want to have it destroyed again. Another part of you felt the desperation through the bond and wanted nothing more than to wrap your arms around Azriel. Letting out a shaky breath, you whispered: “Please don’t break my heart.”

Azriel took that as an invitation to lean in and kiss you. You felt yourself become one with Azriel as he deepened the kiss and started moving his hands up and down your body: “I’ll guard it with my life” Azriel replied; his lips hovering over your own “Thank you for trusting me with it”.

Just as Azriel was about to slip his hands under your dress, a loud cough caused you to pull away. Azriel looked over his shoulder and spotted the general glaring at the two of you: “My high lord is wondering if you will be joining us for dessert or are you two going to fuck instead.”

“Tell Helion that we will not be joining you guys,” you replied before looking up at Azriel: “Tell him that my mate and I are going to be in my room for the rest of the night.”

Azriel gave the general a wicked grin at your response before being pulled upstairs to your room. 

@willowpains

#azriel imagine #azriel x reader #azriel x you #acotar imagine #acotar x reader

[martyfive]

i lay in bed sick for two weeks straight. first there’s body temperature i never knew was possible for a human to have, then there are coughs that feel like they may be the last ones i could ever have in my life, then there’s weakness, then my five year old phone falls down from the bed ending up completely broken, then the bed sheets become something i couldn’t bear to see anymore. then i get up, go outside and unexpectedly find myself at the offer of a somewhat steady part job at this small italian restaurant we’ve been visiting every sunday sharp for the last year and a half except for these two weeks i spent lying sick in bed. we are leaving the bar for the night when R. asks me if i’d like to help her at the bar a couple hours a week.

“i have no experience or anything,” i say, feeling extremely daft. “i’m not even sure i can talk to people properly. i never really could.”

“it’s okay,” she says. “you’ll be polishing the glasses. it’s not hard. i’ll teach you everything.”

on our way home A. says, “it could be good for you, you know. being among people and trying something new,” and i feel like he’s right.

at this point this small restaurant already feels like another home i want to belong to. going there every sunday for so long totally helped with that. they have one of my works i gave them as a present for christmas on the wall. it hangs up above the table me and A. occupied the first time we ever came to eat there. the frame contains pages from a sketchbook i used to draw in while visiting italy five years ago. it feels too personal, but also somehow on it’s place. i hate to hoard the stuff i create. i want to be bolder.

regretting my life choices, i spend all what’s left from my last year’s salary on a new phone. it’s a first phone i bought without anyone’s help. it costs more than i deserve.

i can’t find any will to start drawing again after being sick for two weeks.

a couple days later i go to the restaurant to ask R. about the time i can get to work. she says, “this thursday, 6:30 pm,” and then adds, tugging on my star wars hoodie, “and put on a black shirt, if you have one”.

so i find one that looks like A. has been wearing it during his teenage years when he looked more like a stick than a human and i go for the job that for the first time in my life has nothing to do with any kind of art except the art of making cocktails i still keep messing up. a couple hours a week somehow soon turns into ten as normally as “polishing glasses” turns into “doing everything there is possible to do as quickly as possible”.

“would you like to do thirty hours a week?” R. asks one day looking hopeful as if i hadn’t broken ten of their glasses in the first five days of work.

“my back is gonna die sooner than you expect it to if i agree to that,” i answer. and it really is the only reason i don’t say yes.

i soon notice there is no time to think of anything else except the work to be done while i am behind the bar once again forgetting the difference between prosecco and chardonnay or picking the ice from the ice machine or freezing in the giant fridge while looking for the specific crate of beer everyone in this town drinks more often than water. the countless amount of crates are brought from and to the back room. the ten glasses are crushed, four of them in my own hands just from squeezing too hard on them. i cringe about every single one of them before falling asleep after coming home around midnight with my aching back and more money than i ever earned drawing pictures. i think about that one time my friend told me that once you start working in catering, there’s no way back. i haven’t talked to her in a while and i can’t ask her if she still thinks it’s true.

i still can’t draw. i guess it will pass. i still cough although i’m trying not to be loud when i’m behind the bar.

“you smoke?” R. asks. “i do. i just don’t have time.”

“i’ve been smoking since i was sixteen. but not anymore really,” i say to that. “when my mother calls me, then i smoke. but that doesn’t happen very often.”

M. laughs at that as if he understands what i’m talking about and says, “with this job, i either smoke a cigarette or kill somebody,” and i laugh with him.

M. is the chef and the restaurant is named after him. he cooks so good there is surely nothing better i’ve ever eaten in my entire life. i hear all about it from guests while picking the dishes from the tables, smiling and pretending my hands are not shaking. he and R. speak to each other in loud italian and i like how they sound even if i only understand a couple words from their dialogues.

“what’s allora?” i ask one time.

R. looks at me like i’m the only one who ever asked her a silly question like that, “huh,” she says, “i don’t know. it’s like here we go or something like that,” and she smiles.

i like talking to her. for some reason i like asking her questions and seeing the surprise on her face. she’s five years older than me but i feel like a child around her. she also has her birthday in november.

“all my family are scorpions,” she says after revealing the fact that there’s ten days between our birthdays. she names at least ten of the members of her family and all their november birthday dates in a row.

i say, “the parties must be hilarious when you all gather together.”

more often i feel like she’s my serious boss i keep disappointing with my every move but at the end of the shifts she turns into what feels more like a friend. i secretly hope i can be her friend one day even though it seems like she knows the name of every human being in this town and even some other nearby towns and doesn’t really need any more friends than she already has. but after all, i’m a part of this town now, too.

“what is your favourite thing to do here here at the bar?” i ask the other day.

she looks puzzled for a second, “maybe serving fish,” she says and this time it’s my turn to feel surprised. i saw how it’s done, and i don’t really know what she means.

“i thought it’s talking to people or something,” i say.

“nah,” she waves her hand, “it’s just my job, you know.”

i regret entering this territory but i still ask, “would you better like to do something else? some other job?”

“nah,” she says again, smiling, “i like it.”

and i like it too. horrifyingly, i like it too much. thinking about sitting at home and drawing stuff like i used to do all my life feels like a torture. it surely is one when i pick up my tablet and pencil and stare at the white canvas not knowing who i am anymore. there is nothing in my head i want to say. there is nothing my hands can do. i have no idea why. i want to go back behind the bar and ask R. what her favourite colour is.

“i’m proud of you,” A. says one night while we’re going back home from the restaurant where he got his two beers and one glass of whiskey i poured for him myself. he spent two hours sitting at the bar not far from these three teenage boys who have been drinking an enormous amount of beer and playing cards and then trying to guess where i come from according to my accent. “i’m proud that you’re doing good and you found something that you like so much.”

i buy two black shirts and jeans. i take my old black coat out of the wardrobe. i walk for two minutes from home to the bar and back looking fancier than ever. i feel happier than ever. i don’t look at my social media. i feel like this rotten sadness and loneliness that occupied my head for so long has nothing to do with my life now. i wonder if it’s just a phase. i consider finding a new therapist just to ask them if it’s okay to feel this good or i should be medicated before it’s too late. i want to go to bed at proper hour, wake up earlier, spend the day feeling good and then go to the bar and ask R. stupid questions and be stressed about the things i can control. i look at my workplace at home, at the white canvas that reflects nothingness in my head, at everything i have ever known, and i don’t know what to do.

i go back to work.

“you like it here?” M. asks almost every time. “is everything okay?”

“everything’s okay,” i say, smiling. and i mean it.

someone’s ordering an espresso at 11 pm. R. says, “tell them the coffee machine is already off,” turning it off while saying it. i laugh. i feel happy. i go home knowing there’s gonna be more work to be done tomorrow. i miss drawing stuff. i have nothing to say. i fall asleep thinking of the ten glasses i broke. in the morning, i can’t draw. i used to draw most of my stuff at the evenings and during the nights. now they are full of beer glasses and beer crates and adhd people who want an espresso before bed.

i ask myself if that really is how growing up feels like. i ask myself what i am going to do if i will not be able to draw a single piece of art ever again. i read the email of the person who wants me to draw an artwork for them. i wonder if they should know i’m an imposter who can’t draw anymore. i tell myself to shut up and stop being dramatic.

i go to work.

there’s a wedding at the restaurant. i once again bring what feels like an endless amount of bottle crates from the back room to the bar. i smile. i talk to people. i wipe the tables. i polish the glasses. i pour beer into them.

“my back hurts,” R. says.

“willkommen to the club,” i tell her, although for some reason my back doesn’t really hurt.

someone orders a beer and then changes their mind after the bottle was already opened.

“it’s yours if you want it,” R. says. “your shift is over anyway.”

and i stay. i sit at the bar as if i don’t really work there. i drink my beer, i talk to R. while she puts the new napkins on tables, makes sure everyone from the wedding paid what they had to and lets me ask her my questions. i pay for another beer, taking money from my fresh salary. R. rolls her eyes at that but allows me to pay anyway. she’s not a boss anymore. just… a friend. i tell her i don’t wanna go home.

“i can see that,” she laughs. “do you have friends here in town?” she asks.

i look at the bottom of my glass.

“no,” i say. there’s a lady on our street i sometimes walk our dogs together with. she’s as old as my mother. i always forget the names of her three kids although they’re all around my age. i wonder if i should mention her. “i have friends in other places. you know. not here.”

“i can be your friend here,” she says, smiling.

i feel like it’s the happiest day of my life. i’m also a little drunk on schwarzbier. even if my back would hurt i wouldn’t have noticed.

“if you need someone as me as a friend,” i say, “then. yeah. sure. uh. why not.”

we talk some more. the beer tests my language skills. i tell her i want a new tattoo. she says she got the first one when she was sixteen and it was a horrible butterfly.

“what is your favourite colour?” i finally ask.

she looks really baffled at that, then pulls out her phone. “i guess it’s red,” she says, showing me some of photos from her instagram where she’s younger than me now and is dressed up in red. “see, it looks good on me,” and she’s right. “but white is also good. and pink. and maybe purple. not black though. with my black hair, it doesn’t look good at all.”

we’re both dressed in black for work.

i come to the conclusion that colours are the least important thing in the world to her. that’s okay. i think about all the years i spent trying to make colours work. i wanna say something, but end up saying nothing.

she turns the lights off and locks the restaurant up. we spend a couple minutes walking in the same direction to our houses. i tell her about the name my friends from other places are calling me. i don’t tell her why it’s different from the one she saw on my id card. i’m not that drunk. she says she’s gonna use it from now on. she kisses my cheek before we part. i was at school the last time someone did that.

i go home. i sit at my workplace. i answer to the email of the person that wants me to draw an artwork for them from a new phone i spent enormous amount of money on. for a second i wonder if i should still tell them i’m an imposter and my career will be over by the morning when i wake up sober.

i think about the ten glasses i broke, then let myself forget about them. i tell myself to shut up and stop being dramatic.

i draw.

29/02/2024

#martyfive text #text post #text #diary

[its-your-mind]

what the fuck. what the fuck what the fu k.

rick riordan I am a whole ass adult now how tf are you taking a wrecking ball to my emotions AT THIS POINT. SHOULDN’T WE BE PAST THIS.

what the fuck Meg took in all of her foster siblings to help them live a life after Nero. she’s showing them a world that can be kind, where people will say what they mean, and where mistakes don’t deserve punishment.

BUT THEN ALSO. Apollo. Went back.

And for Meg and her siblings, everything about their lives has changed and improved. But Apollo just… goes back to Olympus. Where Zeus continues to rule with an iron fist, where no one was even able to stick up for him, where every other Olympian lives in fear of Zeus’s anger. And he’s still there, he’s still in charge, but Apollo knows BETTER now. He knows that things can be different. He knows that he can be different, and he’s making the decision to be better now than he was before.

But now he doesn’t fit. He doesn’t fit with the Olympians, who weren’t a healthy family even before this, and he doesn’t fit with his new friends, either, because he’s a god again. He can go see them and talk with them and help them, but he’ll always have to leave again. He can never stay.

The last few chapters of The Tower of Nero were so beautiful and amazing - getting to see everyone else living their happy endings (as much as any demigod can), but they were always tinged with… loneliness. Apollo is separate from them all again. He can teleport at will, he can change his appearance to anything, he can separate his consciousness… and that’s all great, he wanted all of that back…

But by the end? He kind of wanted to stay human. And there’s no resolution for him. He’s gone through this incredible, difficult, terrifying, life-changing adventure… and he came back, and everything’s the same. Kinda makes me think of Luke, going off on his quest, coming back different, harder, sharper… and finding Camp exactly like how he left it, with everyone expecting him to just slot himself back into the place he had before, when that space doesn’t fit him anymore.

And Apollo has what Luke didn’t - friends who knew him as he was changing, who love this new person he’s become, and even a sister whose affection won’t change no matter what happens. He’s going to be okay, I know that.

But there’s just… something so quietly tragic in the end of Apollo’s story. He doesn’t get his own personal happy ending. His “triumph” is a return to a divine status that he’s not necessarily sure he even wants anymore. He has to forge his own path forward towards his own happiness, and we don’t get to join him on it. We got to be with him through his Trials - his future is up to him, now.

#toa #trials of apollo #toa spoilers #trials of apollo spoilers #apollo pjo #lester papadopoulos #rick riordan #FUCK. #LIKE LISTEN UNCLE RICK #IM IN MY TWENTIES TRYING TO FIGURE OUT WHAT THE FUCK TO DO WITH MY LIFE #THE FUCKING AUDACITY YOU HAVE TO BUST INTO MY QUARTER LIFE CRISIS LIKE THIS #smfh #this book is for middle schoolers and it’s caused me #a middle school TEACHER #an entire emotional nuclear disaster #ugh.

[pink-amethyst-tarot]

💌A Message From The Universe💌

P I L E 1 ~ P I L E 2 ~ P I L E 3

How to pick: Take a deep breath and choose between the three images above. It corelates with the message that is meant for you. Trust your intuiton; only you know what is truly best for you.

P I L E 1 ♡ ~ A New Perspective

Ten of Wands, The High Priestess, The Emperor, The Moon, Eight of Swords (Reversed)

You feel burdened. You feel disconnected from yourself and your intuition. I feel that the man problem, is that you don't trust yourself or your inner voice. Let that voice guide you. Listen to yourself because you know what is best for you. You don't have to listen to everyone who thinks they know what is best for you. With it being the holiday season and Christmas is days away, you may be around family that isn't all that supportive of you and what you want with your life. They have put you down since you were a kid but know that you are not that kid anymore. You are capable of standing on your own two feet and it's time to stop making excuses for their bad behavior. You don't have to keep that kind of negative energy in your life, even if they are your relatives. Just because they are blood related, doesn't mean you have to call them family. For a lot of you, this person is a father figure in your life, but they haven't treated you the way that a father should. You were a kid and you deserved better then, and you deserve better now. Your anxiety around this is very loud but you know what you want to do more than anything. You know what path you want to take, and you know what people you want to cut off. Let yourself be happy. Go into this new year prioritizing your wants, needs, desires, hopes and dreams. It's time someone chose you and who better than yourself. Open up your heart and your mind to new possibilities; a world where you can have what you want. It's time for a new perspective.

Channeled Song: I'm Tired by Labrinth ft. Zendaya

now the tide is rollin' in // I don't wanna win // let it take me, let it take me // I'll be on my way // how long can I stay // in a place that can't contain me // hey Lord, you know, I'm tired // hey, Lord, you know I'm tired //

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P I L E 2 ♡

King of Pentacles, Seven of Cups (Reversed), Four of Wands (Reversed), Nine of Wands, Ace of Pentacles

You have been doing some spring cleaning around your life. You have been making changes that you saw needed to be made and it has really brought you back to reality; almost like you are sobering up. You could also be on a sobriety journey and if you are, know that I am very proud of you and I'm rooting for you. If no one else is in your corner, know that I am. You have been doing a lot of hard work and you should be celebrating yourself but, for some reason, you aren't. You may have this mindset of believing that you can't celebrate because there is so much more work to do. That may be true; we are all works in progress. That doesn't mean you shouldn't celebrate and be proud of how far you have come! I'm so very proud of how far you have come. You're looking at all that you still have to do, but you aren't paying attention to what you have done. You can rest, relax and bask in your victories. Take a break because you have earned it. You are meant to be prosperous, and you have new opportunities coming in and you should be confident in taking them because you worked hard to get them. Again, I am so proud of you and all that you have done. Keep going and do not give up.

Channled Song: A Brand New Day by The Wiz Cast

everybody, be glad // because our fear and dread is gone // freedom, you see, has got our hearts singing so joyfully // just look about // you out it to yourself to check it out // can you feel a brand new day? // can you feel a brand new day? //

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P I L E 3 ♡

The Star (Reversed), Two of Pentacles, Four of Swords, The High Priestess, Ace of Pentacles

Your head is not in the right place, right now. You are too focused on the negative and it seems that you have lost hope. You're working to balance things on your own and that is only making things harder for you. You may feel like you're at sea and the boat going up and down with the harsh waves. Let go of the things that you don't need and ask for help with the things that you cannot. I'm getting that you are very overwhelmed at this time. I'm seeing juggling and everyone keeps adding more and more balls, making it so hard to keep up. You don't have to take it. You are allowed to rest and to have some peace and quiet. You may be feeling like you can't take a break right now because, if you don't do it who will? I'll counter that with, why was it set up for you to be the only one who is able to handle things? Why is it you or nobody? Why can't people do it themselves? Sometimes, you just have to say, "if I have to do it, it's not going to get done," and that's that on that. You know that these people are capable and able. They just know they can rely on you to always do it. Stop being reliable. They need to learn to do things on their own and without you because you are not going to always be there.

I don't have a specific channeled song, but I am seeing vacations, beaches and just relaxing, which you deserve, so if you can get that, I suggest that you do.

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LEGAL DISCLAIMER: FOR ENTERTAINMENT PURPOSES ONLY. THESE READINGS ARE FOR ENTERTAINMENT PURPOSES ONLY. no guarantees are implied. These readings are not a substitute or replacement for any professional help or services. My readings are not a substitute for any form of professional legal, medical/psychiatric, relationship, religious/spiritual or financial/ business advice nor consultations. You should always see a professional legal/trained adviser for help in any matter. I am not responsible for any decisions/ actions you take.

#pick a card #pick a pile #pick a photo #pick a picture #pick an image #pac #pap #pac reading #pap reading #pink amethyst tarot #tarot #tarot reading #tarotblr #free tarot reading #tarot community #collective message #collective reading #free tarot #pink amethyst #225 #525 #111 #1111 #212 #888 #999 #777 #445 #678 #1234

[black-aurora-nora]

Irreplaceable Pt. 2 | Yandere!Avengers x Reader

It'd been about three weeks since you'd had your life taken away from you.

You'd been living in the Avengers Tower seeing as you had no where else to go.

When you tried to call your parents the first week, Natasha was the one that decided to tell you that they'd been arrested by SHEILD for having relations with HYDRA.

You didn't believe her, but she was quick to bring you to their holding cells.

You and your parents both knew that it was the Avengers doing, but had no power or evidence to show it.

You'd wept for days after that.

Your ex-friends had really taken everything that had meaning to you.

And now, you were laying across one of the many luxury couches in one of the many common rooms of the tower.

You would much rather be in your room, but Tony made sure that Jarvis locked you out after 9 o'clock. He believed that forcing you out to hang with everyone would get you back to how you used to be. Or at least somewhere close to it.

Sooner or later, you would realize that all of this was for you.

Natasha was sat beside you, legs crossed with wireless earphones in, watching whatever on her phone.

There was always someone with you once you were forced out of your room. You barely got any time alone when you were awake.

Hell, you couldn't even get any time alone at night anymore. The anxiety from having your life taken from you made it impossible to sleep and Tony was quick to get you medicated to help out with that.

You still felt like shit either way.

Steve came strolling into the living area, bidding you both a good morning.

You gave no kind of response, staring forward at nothing in particular, wrapped up in a light blue, fleece blanket that you'd received as a gift from a friend when you'd first gotten ownership of the library.

"Hey, (Y/N), did you eat this morning?" Steve asked, at your lack of answer, he sighed exasperatingly, "Come on, (Y/N), you know that you have to eat. You'll never feel better if you just lay around all day."

Natasha began to stroke your head, trying to get you to pay attention but you quickly slapped her hand away and pushed yourself up into a sitting position.

"I'll never feel better. You guys can sit here and pretend that we're one big happy family, but I'm not playing." You started, voice shaky with anger and sadness, "You never supported me and abused your power to take away my life and made me dependent on you guys. And now you guys want me to be happy?"

Steve and Natasha only stared. Were they taking in your words? Who knows. You didn't care.

"No. I will not give you my happiness or my willing compliance. None of you deserve that part of me anymore."

"I have brought poptarts for Young (Y/N)!" Thor's boisterous voice boomed, a warm plate of freshly toastered poptarts in his hands for you both to share.

At the sullen atmosphere, Thor looked between his friends, "Am I interrupting something?"

"No, Thor. (Y/N)'s just a little hangry. Thanks for bringing the poptarts." Natasha answered for you, gesturing for the god to come over, "You guys eat while Steve and I go find the guys."

You watched the two leave and pushed the plates of poptarts away from your person, leaving Thor in the dust and hiding away in the bathroom, ignoring his calls for you.

You lowered yourself to the cool tile, gripping fistfuls of your hair.

Why?

Why did this have to happen to you?

Why did they do this to you?

You wished there was some way to get out of this, but... where would you even go?

You couldn't survive homelessness in New York. And it'd be increasingly hard to find a job now that you had a criminal record due to your 'friends' planting confidential information in your library.

And even if you did land a job, it wouldn't provide you with a livable wage. You'd be barely surviving.

And could you ever really escape the Avengers?

Though the better question was, could you survive playing family with them? You doubted they would ever grow tired of you.

They really made sure that you had no other choice.

A knock on the door jolted you from your spiraling mental, "(Y/N), what did I tell you about hiding in the bathroom?!" It was Tony, the one you hated the most.

You could feel something in your mind cracking again, somehow worse than when your library was taken. Everything was really starting to close in on you.

These bastards... these bastards really wanted you to be happy for them... like some kind of fucking dog they found abandoned in the freezing cold.

Tony knocked more and you could hear Bruce telling him to ease up, "You're gonna scare them. They'll open it when they're ready."

Oh, but you'd never be ready.

The knocking stopped and you continued to stay seated on the ground, staring at the tile and hands tightly gripping your hair.

Why couldn't they have just left you alone like you'd asked?

You were left alone to your spiraling thoughts, your breathing growing more and more intense. Your heart beat through your chest, screaming and riving to be let out.

Your vision was starting to go spotty. Nothing else mattered but how angry you were. All you could see was bright red.

A scream ripped from your throat, splattering the confined walls of the bathroom and spilling out through the crevices of the closed door.

Pain began to blossom on your head, but you didn't care. You were too angry to care about physical pain.

Why and what were you being punished for?

Why had these demons, calling themselves angels, from hell do everything they could in their power to knock you down to try and piece you back together?

What gave them the right?

Now you were on the bathroom floor losing your mind when you could've been helping a young woman find a good book to check out or having a bagel from across the street while you read at the counter.

"(Y/N)! Goddamnit! (Y/N), STOP!" Bruce was on your back, desperately trying to grab your hands.

You fought against him, screaming to be left alone but he didn't. He just kept your hands away from your head and instructed you to breathe.

Once your breathing was under control, you noticed that something was in your hands and slowly glanced over, whimpering when you'd noticed what you'd done.

Thick clumps of hair were gripped tightly in both your bloodied fists. And there were plenty more strands and clumps decorating the tiled floor around you accompanied by droplets of blood.

You tried to stand up but Bruce kept you on the ground and you growled, "Get off! Let me see!" You snapped, tears welling in your eyes.

"No!" He snapped back, "It's not bad... there's no need to look."

"You're a fucking liar." You sobbed, "All of you are liars!"

Once you'd wept yourself to sleep and had been put to bed early, the team decided to have a late night meeting.

Tony took a swig of his scotch. He rubbed a hand down his face. Everyone was silent, waiting for someone to speak up.

"Ok, they're not adjusting. I admit it." Tony spoke.

"Yeah, just like I'd warned." Natasha reminded coolly.

"We should've went about this more slowly. (Y/N) could've easily been coaxed to live here." Clint added, arms crossed.

Steve shook his head, "No, they loved that library way too much... worked too hard to get it. They never would've left that library for us."

Bruce tapped a finger against the table impatiently, "We have to do something. We can't carry on like everything's normal," He had a hard frown stuck on his face, "(Y/N) is not ok. We brought them here for their own good and they seem to be doing worse than ever."

They all went silent again. What were they going to do?

Natasha's eyes sparked and she looked over at Clint with a knowing gaze, "Clint, isn't there an agent with memory-altering abilities?"

Clint visibly brightened at that, "Agent Keller."

_______________________________________________

"(Y/N), it's time to wake up. Steve is almost finished making breakfast downstairs." JARVIS spoke calmly.

With a big stretch, you yawned and rolled out of bed. A dull throb throughout your head made it's presence known and you winced slightly, making your way to the common area.

"Hey, everybody!" You called out.

"(Y/N)!" Steve greeted, "You made it just in time. I just finished the banana pancakes, you want any eggs and bacon before they get taken?" He asked.

You shrugged, nodding tiredly, "Yeah, I'll have some."

Everyone began to make their way to the table, plates stacked with food.

Tony was the last to arrive, smiling at you carefully, "How's your head feeling?"

You smiled back, a fond smile, "A little sore... but the medicine you gave me is making it manageable."

Clint nodded at that, "Yeah, having your hair ripped off by a beggar will do that." He teased.

You chuckled back, "Yeah... also... I had a crazy ass dream last night. I was a bookkeeper with a whole book store. A bookkeeper, can you guys believe that?" You ate a bite of eggs with a thoughtful gaze, "But... it was so nice."

Natasha hummed at that, her chin resting in her hand as she stared at you quizzingly, "But not as nice as being here with us, right?"

You shook your head, "No, I suppose not."

#platonic yandere #yandere #yandere avengers #marvel #marvel yandere #yandere tony stark #yandere steve rogers #yandere thor #yandere natasha romanoff #yandere clint barton #yandere bruce banner #cw #cw mindbreak #mind break #memory loss #tw manipulation #tw cursing #tw infantilization #tw bl0od

[weaselbeaselpants]

Lindsay Ellis plagiarized a ndn author

This post isn't a callout and it's only my own post because the OP source I just learned it from, @neechees, doesn't allow rbgs at a certain point on that post.

After Hmbomberguy's expose on Illuminaughtii and James Somerton some people are giving a well deserved eye back to the leftube sphere that was kind of schism-d and held under scrutiny in what I feel was, a lot of the time, misinformed hate campaigns in response to genuine criticism; especially towards Lindsay Ellis who up left after she was canceled and hasn't returned to continuous video making publicly even after people have mostly agreed the hatedom directed for her Raya and the Last Dragon takes was stupid and was erasing actual SEA people's discussions of the culture. To hear and see a decent breakdown of that film's representation problems BEYOND the Ellis-parts because it's worth your wild regardless of if you've seen the movie, please watch the three part video series hosted by Xiran Jay Zhao.

To tl;dr the 2021 drama: people have held an ire towards Ellis for a long time feeling like her and her white-woman base talk over, steal, or just straight up don't apologize for their own racism towards women and ppl of color, and after Lindsay did a problematic by pointing out that Raya and the Last Dragon was like ATLA, people jumped on her.

Being both a longtime fan of Ellis and white as fucc, I personally feel like Lindsay kind of forgave herself and threw out the actual criticisms held against her every bit as much as people just kind of treated her like a punching bag. Or, to paraphrase @padawan-historian's old takes from then, they treated Lindsay like she was trying to be the ENTIRE conversation, not the start of one, and like every possible outcome that could happen over her videos was her fault personally. Some of Lindsay's loudest and nastiest 'critics' were, in fact, other white people or just people who have no good faith in addressing her fuck ups, like Lily Orchard, fe.

One 'Lindsay did a racism'point tho that I felt wasn't truly addressed in full though were claims by indigenous people that she was anti-native, especially in her videos about Twilight and Pocahontas, which yeah at the time I was very passive of you can 100% find post abt that. But then Neechees linked me to an article I, and I think a lot of other video essay-fans had never seen before. This article accused Lindsay of stealing half of her talking points on Disney's Pocahontas from theirs.

When people on the breadtube spectrum talk of Lindsay, even people who criticized her at the time. all kind of agree that the intensity of the backlash was uncalled for and, while not everyone agrees if her public silence is a 'canceling' or not, agree with her need to just take care of herself these days. For those curious, this is the article making this claim:

I am not saying you need to all unfollow and hate everything Lindsay ever touched, mkay? But I also genuinely hope that Lindsay addresses this+comes clean because holy fuck. Unlike Somerton, all I can tell you is I don't just 'believe Windsey wouldn't hurt nobody uwu~'. I am pretty certain that Lindsay care about the topics she covers, for whatever that's worth to say as another whiteperson. It's just that, like Contrapoints, I ALSO think she has a tendency to deflect criticism within that sphere and lump all her negative bagage together. This really sucks cuz not all of us are Lily Orchards or Vaush clones.

Most of us are/were casual watchers of Lindsay like we are Hbomber, Contra, Lady Emily, Folding Ideas, and ToddintheShadows (does he count as leftube idk?) and we really, genuinely don't want to believe that Lindsay stole from + refuses to listen to women of color when they call her out.

Where I like almost everyone in the leftoob analyst sphere that's ever growing and hopefully now weeding out Illumanaughtii-s and Sommerton-s of the world, there ARE controversies within the space that I don't agree with creators on. Some are dumb things like the exact takes Lindsay has about movies n shows that I just up and disagree with her on, Princess Weekes' proshipping apologia that I have LOTS of thoughts on. However, some matters are clearly personal and about maters that just don't involve me. Earlier this year, Folding Ideas and Lady Emily ctrl+alt+deleted some replies they made to Quinton Reviews, making clear that they very much still dislike him based on something that happened between Quinton, Lindsay and I think SarahZ. And by "dislike", I mean also still believeing his former editor over him on who was boundary pushing about who in their relationship. On the offchance any of those creators or their stans somehow see this, know that I'm not going to tell any of you guys how to feel about whatever Quinton did in private I'm not aware of; it's just that I also happen to believe Quinton on this issue and I don't like the guiltybyassociation mantra.

>>>>side note: I hate that every time someone says "I believe so and so after hearing their side now" ppl jump on the "you were just a stan from the beginning and never actually able to listen"-bs. Yeah, being more familiar with one creator over the other means there's bias, sure, but I kinda hate that that once held bias means you can't be held as any kind of source or form your own opinions. <<<

Big introvert vibes ahead: the thing about any big social circle of better-spoken people than you is they ALL seem like a scary meangirl's table from outside looking in. The kind that'll send goons after you with passive-aggressive "this is slander against me and I have the right to be upset abt it sorry if the stans eat you alive". They can also be made out by their fans to be harmless internet nobody's who YOU are at fault for getting mad and staying mad at cuz it's not like it matters on the internet and are clearly just out for drama and 'twofaced' yourself. I think the reality is the same thing that drives every community forward as well as drives them apart: these people are legitimate friends. They stick up for each other the same way we stick up for our personal internet friends whenever there's shit coming their way. The breadtube circle, whoever that is at this point, clearly know some shit we don't about themselves as much as they don't know shit about us and our true intentions. One of them has a platform and responsibility, where the other has power in masses and following them or not. We gotta all make the choices best for us.

Anyway. I guess, if any of the stuff about Lindsay ripping off that writer IS true, I really hope that she admits and apologizes for it. That's not cool to do to her indigenous audience, or even me, one of her white fans who expects actually allyship.

#breadtube #lefttube #hbomberguy #lindsay ellis #critical #ndn tag #indigenous rights #plagerism

[formulalfc]

Here for you, forever.

Mick Schumacher x reader

tw-swearing, smut, unprotected sex (wrap it before you tap it), swearing, lmk if there's anymore

You had been working for Mick as his PR manager ever since he came into Formula one and you had loved every minute of it.  He was such an easy person to talk to, always so kind and considerate in everything he did and you considered him one of your really close friends.

It was the last race of the 2022 season and you knew Mick was going to be upset when he came back to the garage, especially after that radio after he started doing doughnuts at the end.

You felt so bad for Mick, you couldn’t understand why the Haas team were being so harsh towards him, nobody as sweet as Mick deserved to be treated like that.

So when Mick got back to the garage you silently followed him to his drivers room, he pushed open the door, holding it so you could get in, his silent acceptance of your presence that warmed your heart.

He sat on the small sofa, his head in his hands and you quickly perched yourself next to him and ran your palm up and down his back, scratching at the base of his neck when you reached his neck.

His body leaned towards yours and soon enough he was sobbing into the crook of your neck, his arms tightly wrapped around your waist as you held each other close. 

The sound of his sobs made your heart clench, your own tears appearing at his utter heartbreak.

After a while, his tears subsided but you both remained snuggled together. You wiped some tears from his face as he moved from your neck.

You whispered to him as you got rid of the salty tears that lingered, “I know it hurts right now micky, but trust me this is going to lead to better things. You and I both know that you are an amazing driver, but you’re an even better person Mick and that is going to take you far. I am so proud of you, everyone that loves you is so proud of you and I guarantee your dad is to.”

His eyes held unshed tears but that didn’t stop him from bringing your face into him as he brought your lips together, kissing you like you were his everything.

You pushed him back before lifting a leg over him to rest on his lap, your hands coming up to stroke his cheeks as you made eye contact with him.

One of his hands was wrapped around your waist, the other grasped the back of your neck, pulling you back into him.

Your mouths met in a soft, slow kiss, the fact that you were both smiling into it making it harder to flow smoothly, but neither of you cared, you were just happy to be near each other.

Things quickly got heated between you two as you grinded down into him, his hands grabbing the flesh of your ass to push you over his dick that was becoming harder by the second.

Whimpers escaped both of you, the fact that you were making him feel good only making you work harder.

Your hands grasped at Mick’s top, pulling it up and over his head, mouths disconnecting for a millisecond before coming together again to continue their exploration of each other.

You unbuttoned the front of your work top, revealing the lacy red bra you had underneath, and throwing the shirt on the floor when you were done.

Mick broke away from you to glance down at your chest, a whine leaving his throat at the sight of you, he brought his face to your chest, mouthing at the top of your boobs that wasn’t covered by your bra, then unclipping it and throwing it across the room.

You grinded yourself over his hard length again, needing to relieve some of the pent-up frustration.

“So needy for me baby, don’t worry love I’ve got you” Mick muttered against you as he continued trailing hickeys across your chest, letting everyone know just who you belonged to.

He pushed you down onto your back, one hand cradling your head gently while the other moved to the zip of your jeans, successfully ridding you of them and your panties at the same time.

He looked at you led there, bare just for him, like he was looking at the Mona Lisa itself, like you were a piece of artwork that deserved to be hung up with the most prestigious of them all.

He lowered himself so he hovered over your pussy, his breath making you shiver in anticipation whining at him to do something, “Im gunna take care of you don’t worry baby” whispered against you before he licked a line up your folds, giving your clit a flick at the end.

He ate you out like he thought it was the last time he would ever see you, your back arching as he used his tongue to circle your hole before pushing two of his fingers in.

As he used his fingers to stretch you out, he was licking and sucking at your clit, whines and moans coming out of you at the pleasure he was bringing to you.

You could feel yourself getting close to finishing and Mick could feel it to, pulling away when he felt you clenching around his fingers.

You whined at him, trying to push his head back down towards your centre but he just chuckled at you before shutting you up by slapping your clit with his dick before sliding it into your hole.

Your eyes rolled back into your head as you were stretched out by his huge cock. Yours hands digging into his shoulders as he hit your spot repeatedly, trailing kissing on your neck and marking his territory.

You got close to your peak relatively quickly as his dick hit your spot over and over again, you could tell he was close as he started thrusting into you faster and faster.

With his hand that wasn’t holding you up he circled your clit, your hips parting from the bed as your mouth opened in a silent scream as you came. He finished inside you moments later and he thrusted into you a few more times to push his cum into you.

When he pulled out a few moments later you winced at the feel of it, he pressed a kiss to your forehead before he got up, pulling his boxers on and then walking across the room to grab a cloth, wiping you down gently when he got back to you.

He grabbed one of his t-shirts from the side and pulled it over your head before pulling your legs over his lap and you snuggled into his side.

One of his hands gently patted your hair while the other drew shapes on your leg, you rested your chin on his shoulder, admiring him as he looked down at you.

And while you were worried for Mick and what the next chapter in his life would hold, you knew that no matter what you would always be there for him and you would always love him.

#formulalfc #mick schumacher #mick schumacher x reader #mick schumacher imagine #mick schumacher x you #mick schumacher fluff #mick schumacher fanfic #mercedes #mercedes amg f1 #lewis hamilton #f1 2023 #mercedes f1 #haas f1 team #formula 1 #formula one x you #formula one x reader #formula one imagine #formula one fanfiction #f1 fic #f1 x reader #f1 imagine #f1 fanfic #f1 #formula 1 x reader #formula 1 imagine #formula 1 fanfic #formula 1 x you #formula 1 fic #formula one

[misc-obeyme]

Lesson 32 spoilers below (including the hard lesson, though it is labelled as such):

My poor baby Levi. After all that, he blamed himself. It's perfectly understandable for him to be upset about MC trying to leave. And yet he was convinced that he didn't deserve to feel that way. Please my heart can't take any more of this.

HOWEVER.

We didn't even get to see his Little D at all. I wonder if we'll see him at some point after the flood? It just seems like we've met everyone else's...

ALSO.

A looooot of talking about MC's special room this time. I no longer think these are the past brothers/characters. At this point, I think these are all the same characters, even Solomon. That's why we've never seen past Solomon. Because he isn't there.

I think it's some kind of spell/curse/magic that has transported everyone back to the past. (Or a simulated version of the past.) Everyone but Solomon and MC lost their memories, making it so their memories start at that moment in the past that they were sent to. It isn't that they are past versions of the brothers. It's that they're the same versions, but sent to the past with their memories wiped. And yet despite whatever magic did that (or perhaps a deliberate flaw of it), they get vibes from MC's old room.

This is the only explanation that makes sense to me anymore. It's the only way they can have feelings about MC's room, the only way characters like Luke can talk about how it feels right to spend time with Simeon and Solomon, likely the only reason we've never met or had to worry about past Solomon. I think this truth is what Solomon told Simeon at the end of season one (I don't quite remember what lesson it was). I think Barbatos knows because for some reason the magic doesn't work on him, but he's going along with it.

It just doesn't make sense otherwise. In this lesson they discuss how the feelings they get from that room are getting stronger.

I think that when MC has made pacts with all of them again, everybody gets their memories back. And this new experience of the past is the one they remember as reality. A way to retcon the past without changing the OG story.

I know people have speculated about this before, I am not at all the first person to think this is the case. But the more I think about it, the more this seems like the only plausible scenario?

And the only scenario in which we aren't abandoning a version of the brothers that we've come to love. Because it's actually been the same set of brothers all along.

Still have no clue who Nightbringer is or what the purpose of doing any of this is. And I could be way off base here. But I guess we'll see.

Hard Lesson:

I would also like to say that of course Solomon made the inside of the boat a freakin' castle. THOUGH. OH SHIT.

I was legit just gonna talk about how funny I thought that was, but isn't it just another example of the fact that Solomon can create entirely different worlds with magic? Though if Solomon is the one who created another world, it seems weird that his magic would also be declining in that world? Though he can clearly make entire ark-castles so maybe it's not as bad as it seemed?

ALTHOUGH I think it would be very interesting if Nightbringer is using Solomon's magic (or making Solomon use his magic) to create this alternate past. And Solomon's magic is fading because he's using so much of it to maintain that place. (MC's magic fading might be more about trying to impart urgency so they'll make pacts faster.)

ANYWAY. This is all speculation obviously lol. Solomon is a silly guy who loves MC so I think the only way he could be actually involved is if Nightbringer is somehow forcing him. (Like he might do all of that if it's going to, say, save MC's life in the end or something.)

Ugh I'm so tired of speculating lol. Any time I'm like okay but what if...? I end up writing myself in circles trying to figure things out.

This whole Nightbringer thing better be DONE by the end of this season or I am going to be UPSET.

Anyway, we all know you did CPR to save us, Levi, it's okay. You can say it tee hee. <3

#this game is going to drive me insane #I say that as if it hasn't already #obey me #obey me nightbringer #obey me nightbringer spoilers #spoilers #obey me nightbringer lesson 32 #misc lesson recap #misc rambles #starting to think I need a misc speculates about where the HELL this story is going AGAIN tag

[jamdoughnutmagician]

High Flyer

Eddie Munson X Cheerleader!Reader (18+)

Summary:Eddie spends some time in his van with his girlfriend, before her big performance at the school’s football game.

Warnings:Small bit of fluff in the beginning but the rest is just complete and utter filth. Teasing, Uniform Kink (kind of? Eddie love’s Reader’s Cheerleading outfit), Kissing, Oral Sex (F Receiving), Fingering, Dirty Talk, A sickening abundance of NIcknames/Pet Names, Spitting, unprotected sex. If I’ve missed anything let me know so I can tag it!

Word Count:2,604

Authour’s Note: Part 3 of my loosely connected Eddie and Cheerleader fics, you can read part 1 here, and part two here. I just really enjoy writing for these two, so hopefully y’all enjoy this filth too!

Masterlist

Eddie was never one to grace Hawkins’ high school football fields, not if he could help it. Especially when there was a game on. The stifling air of the sweaty, game-focused jocks was not his usual scene. However there was no way he was going to miss out on seeing you performing at half-time.

After working up the courage to actually ask you out on a date, admittedly after deciding that perving on you from afar wasn’t good enough for him anymore, you had, much to his surprise, said yes. And, now, after many dates, many successful dates, Eddie had asked you to be his girlfriend, and even further more to his surprise you had once again said yes.

So now he was here, waiting around for the game to start. Looking around he suddenly spots a familiar face in the swarm of people. He sees the familiar choppy shoulder-length bob and freckles features of Robin, and as soon as he spots her, she comes bouncing over to him.

“You are the last person I would expect to see here, Eddie.” She says with a raised eyebrow. 

Oh yeah? Well, what are you here for, Buckley? I didn’t exactly peg you as a high-school football fan.” he said, hoping to distract her and dodge her question.

“Oh! I’m here to see Vickie!” Robin beamed brightly.

Ah yes, Eddie was well aware of who Vickie was. Everyone was. Considering how much Robin talked about her. They had only recently started dating and robin was a very proud and easily excited girlfriend it would seem.

“Yeah, she’s singing the national anthem before the game, so I’m here to be the supportive girlfriend that I am, and cheer her on from the bleachers.” she explained with a bright smile.

Eddie cringed slightly, before offering Robin a kind smile. If it was one thing Vickie was known for, it certainly wasn’t her singing voice. However, she made Robin happy so he wasn’t about to say anything to her that would burst her bubble. He was Robin’s friend after all.

“So what is it that’s got Eddie Munson showing up to his high-school football game, because I know you wouldn’t be here unless there was something in it for you.” Robin teases.

“You know how you’re being a supportive girlfriend to Vickie?” he starts.

“Yeah…” Robin drags out, wondering where on earth this conversion could possibly be going.

“Well..I’m being a supportive boyfriend,” he said confidently.

Robin looked at Eddie, her eyebrows knitting together in confusion. Eddie had a girlfriend? Since when?

"Well, you know y/n?" He starts.

"Wait..y/n? The cheerleader? That y/n?" She babbles.

"Yup, that's the one. We've been out on a couple of dates and things have been going real good." he finishes with a wide grin.

“You really like her don’t you, huh?” Robin teases once more.

“Yeah, I really do, Rob”

“Good for you, Eddie. You deserve to be happy” she smiles at her friend.

Just as he’s enjoying his conversation with Robin, he spots you over her shoulder. Waving to you, you come bouncing over to immediately crush him in a hug and a kiss on his cheek.

“Teddy!!!” you squeal excitedly. “I didn’t know you were going to be here!”

“Teddy, huh?” Robin covers her little laugh with a cough at the mention of your affectionately sweet nick-name for the metal-head.

“Hey Sugar, I want you to meet a friend of mine. This is Robin,” he says motioning to the girl opposite him.

You take Robin’s hand and shake it enthusiastically before bringing her into a friendly hug.

“It’s always nice to meet one of Teddy’s friends.” you say with a smile as you release her from your arms.

“Likewise” she smiled at you. “So will you be staying here long?” 

“Actually Robin, I hope you don’t mind me stealing my girl away. There’s something I’d been meaning to show her.” Eddie interjects.

“Oh sure! Perhaps we can catch up another time! It was nice meeting you!” Robin says brightly as Eddie begins to gently pull you away from the conversation.

Eddie slings his arm around your waist, pulling you close to his side.

“You’ve got some time before you have to go out and perform, right? “ Eddie asks, his big brown eyes looking at you from under his fringe of curls.

“Yeah I got some time, why?”

“Because, Sugar, There’s something I wanna show you.” he answers with a wide smirking  grin spreading across lips.

Eddie walks you from the football fields to the school's parking lot, right over to where his van is parked.

As your hand reaches for the passenger side door handle, he directs you to the back of his van where he opens up the double doors at the back.

You peer into the open space in the back of his van, and you can see all the carefully laid out blankets, and soft cushions spread out on the floor.

“I know it’s not anything fancy, but every time I see you in this cheerleading outfit, Sweets...fuck…swear it gets me hard at the worst times.” 

“Oh you like the uniform, huh?”  you tease.

“Yeah, just the other day you had me trying to hide my boner behind my desk. Had to rush off to the bathroom after class to go deal with it.” he chuckles.

“Didn’t know it got you going that bad, Teddy..” you say as you sway your hips, causing the skirt of your uniform to twirl around you.

“Was thinking maybe we could have some fun, Y’know,  just the two of us.” he smirks, his deep brown eyes raking over you in an intense, unabashed gaze.

'Oh is that so?' you blush.

'I'll show you a good time if you'll let me' he smiles, kindly offering you his hand to help you step into the back of his van.

Taking his hand, you make your way into the van, and begin to settle yourself amongst the soft blankets and pillows he's so carefully laid down.

“Did you do all this for me, Ed?” you ask him sweetly.

“Only the best for my girl. Gotta make sure my little high-flyer is comfortable now, don’t I?” he says, crawling into the back to join you, his body hovering over yours as he holds himself above you. 

Leaning your head up, you bring your lips to meet his. His lips are warm and slightly chapped, as you kiss him, both your bodies huddle together in the cosy space of his van.

He pulls his lips away from you for a moment, gazing deeply into your eyes once more before he settles himself between your spread thighs.

“Been thinking about this all day, Sweets..” he admits as flips up the skirt of your uniform, pressing a delicate kiss over your panties. “Will you let me taste you, please” he pleads with you.

You nod your head, smiling down at your boyfriend’s mess of frizzy curls as his lips trail butterfly-light kisses to the soft skin of your inner thigh. 

That little smiling nod of your head was all the green light Eddie needed before his large hands were running up the length of your thighs and his fingers were slipping into the elastic waistband of your panties. He drags them down your legs and pockets them into the back of his jeans.

“Just for safekeeping, Sugar.” he smirks.

His focus is back on you in an instant, his lips blazing a hot trail of sloppy kisses along the length of your legs, stopping at the inside of your thigh to gently nibble at the soft flesh.

“Can never resist the thighs…Fuck…They’re so soft”

With one more kiss to the inside of your thigh, you feel his hot breath ghost over your exposed pussy.

“Hello my pretty girl…I’ve missed you my sweet thing..” he almost all but purrs out when he’s greeted by the sight of your pussy.

His head leans down to press a soft gentle kiss to your clit, before he tongue swipes a long wet stripe from the bottom of your slit to the very top. His tongue swirls around your clit a few times, before he’s flicking over it until he feels your hands weave their way to tangle into the mess of his hair. 

He cheekily smiles against you as he feels your fingers tugging at the roots of his hair, almost as if you’re trying to control his movements. Trying to get him to be right where you need him most. 

He’s lapping up your sweet juices, moaning into you as he does. The tip of his nose nudging at your clit as he slurps up everything you have to give him. He slyly slips one of his fingers into your tight wet heat, slowly drawing it in and out of you, all the while his lips have once again wrapped themselves around your clit, suckling on it  until you’re whining above him.

“Please…” you moan desperately.

“What is it pretty girl?” You can hear the teasing tone in his voice, he was loving this.

“Wanna cum…Please…Feels so good” you whine as you shamelessly grind your hips against your boyfriend's face.  

“Well who am I to deny such a polite request from a pretty girl like you?” he mumbles against you, before slipping another one of his thick fingers inside you. His other hand is pressed firmly on your lower stomach, and the pads of his fingertips are brushing against that spot deep inside you that has you screwing your eyes shut in pleasure.

“Can feel how tight you’re squeezing my fingers, Princess..Cum for me, Sweet Thing..”

The combination of Eddie’s fingers pressing inside you and his pretty pink lips sucking on your clit was all it took before you were riding out your release against his face.

“Good girl…Good fuckin’ girl..Tastes so fucking sweet..” he moans as he helps you to come down from the rushing high of your orgasm.

You begin to reach your hands towards him to unclip the handcuffs holding his belt together, and unzip him from where his cock is pressing against the dark denim of his ripped jeans. 

“Wanna return the favour, Teddy” you say sweetly, batting your eyelashes at him.

“There’ll be plenty of time for that some other time, Princess, I promise. Right now I just really wanna feel you.” He tells you, his lips brushing against yours as he speaks.

He works on undoing his own jeans, pulling them down along with his boxers so that they sit around his thighs. Just enough to free his hard cock from the confines of the constricting fabric.

You watch with wide eyes as he holds his open palm up to your lips.

“Be a good girl and spit for me” 

You part your lips to let a string of drool fall from between them.

“There it is…always such a good girl for me, aren’t you?” he teases, using his spit-slick hand to glide over the length of his hard cock.  

He moves closer to you, cock in hand as he guides himself towards your wet cunt. He presses his pre-cum slick tip to your clit, rubbing over it a few times, watching as your body shudders with a moan.

He finally slides himself into you, slowly, inch by inch, letting you adjust to the stretch of his thick cock that's nestled snugly, deep inside your tight wet heat.

He leans forwards, supporting himself up on his arms as he captures your lips in a claiming kiss. 

"Wanna make you feel good, Princess…"

He rolls his hips into you a few times before he hears your pleas begging him to go faster.

"Eddie…please…I need you…need you to move, please" you whine, your fingers digging into the skin under his Black Sabbath t-shirt.

That was all the go-ahead Eddie needed from you before his hips were snapping into action, thrusting forward to fill you with his thick cock.

“So fuckin’ tight around my dick, Sugar…Swear this pretty little pussy was just made for me” he rasps out with a moan, pushing himself into you with every thrust.

He sets an unwavering and relentless pace, the sound of skin slapping against skin resounding in the confined space of his van, as he thrusts himself in the warm wet heat of your soaked pussy.

His thick length fills you perfectly every time. His deep and precise thrusts ensure that his tip is nudging against your g-spot with every roll of his hips. The gush of your juices make it so easy for him to slide himself inside your wet pussy.

Eddie’s dark curls are stuck to his forehead, the exertion of his efforts to please you evident on the flushed features of his face.

“Look so pretty taking my cock like this…fuck” he praises.

“Close…Eddie…feels so good…please..” you plead with a desperate whine. You aren’t really sure what you were even begging for at this point, all that you knew that it all felt too much. Too much and too good.

His fingers find your clit, the rough pads of his guitarists fingers rubbing over your sensitive bundle of nerves in quick, tight circles.

“Can feel how tight you’re squeezing on me Sweets…Gonna make me blow my load, I swear..” 

“Fill me up Eddie..Please..I want it so bad..please..” you beg

“Fuck…You want me to fill up this pretty pussy..want me dripping out of you..” Eddie moans as he thrusts a few more times, pushing his hips forward until he’s as deep as he could possibly be in you. 

His thrusts slow down as you clench around him, your legs locking around his waist to keep him close to you while your body shudders with the rush of your orgasm washing over you.

Eddie’s cock pulses deep in you, filling you with rope after rope of the hot spurts of his release. His fingers sink into the soft skin of your hips, while he blows his load in you.

He holds still for a moment, your walls wrapping around his softening cock. Pulling out of your warm heat with a slight hiss, Eddie looks as the sticky, pearly essence of him trails its way out of your pussy.

“Want you full of me while you’re out there, Sugar” he winks at you, before swiping his cum on his fingers and pushing it back into you and pulling your panties up to stop anymore of his release from leaking out of you.

In your freshly fucked out, lust-addled brain you over hear the loud cheers coming from the other side of the school.

“Fuck fuck fuck fuck…Teddy, I’ve gotta go…I’m gonna be late for the big performance!” You panic, rushing to straighten yourself up and fix your hair. “I’m supposed to be at the top of the pyramid! The girls are counting on me!” You worry, as you begin to make your way out of his van.

He captures your lips once more in a sweet kiss before he watches you rush off to the other side of the school to join the rest of the cheer squad.

“Go knock ‘em dead, my little high-flyer!” he shouts out to you from across the yard.

“Thanks Teddy!!”

Eddie watched every second of your performance with wide eyes and pride in his heart. If he happened to see a slightly sticky trail down the inside of your thighs as you pose at the top of the pyramid, then that was between you and him, and he wouldn’t have it any other way.

@munsonology @mcbeanzontoast @harringtons-cupid @penguinsandpotterheads @i-me-mine

#eddie munson x reader #eddie munson x female reader #eddie munson smut #eddie munson x reader smut #eddie munson x female reader smut #eddie munson x cheerleader!reader #eddie munson #eddie munson fanfiction #stranger things #stranger things s4 #stranger things fanfiction

[agendabymooner]

colour me your colour || toto w. (5)

Summary: Tilly Marie nearly loses faith in her passion as she refuses to listen to everyone who told her to quit. Everyone but one. And it’s the man she met years ago at a racing event she didn’t want to attend. Who would have thought that her father’s partial ownership of three brands could take her to the zone of Mercedes and meet the love of her life?

Chapter summary: Breakfast dates can turn into a shitshow if you allowed pressure and stress to get in the way of your sweet conversation. Plus, it turns out that Toto Wolff knows who she was- only telling her about it as he recalls what he saw few years ago.

Content warning: A case of burnout, brief use of explicit language, people trying to cope by flirting (Tilly), Christian Horner, journalists being too much, Tilly trying not to cry by talking to herself.

Note: Thank you all sm for the 75 followers! I'm going try not to flop this time. Enjoy xx

masterlist

v. how to romance and cry in the same day

“…I have attached the document in this email. If you need help let me know…” 

I don’t need help. I need to quit. 

If anyone can see my face right now, they will run away knowing that they witnessed steam coming out of my ears. Or at least, that’s what Toto can see as I can see a frown on his face. The paper in his hand is long forgotten as he continues to show his concern. I’m still not looking at him, instead I’m staring at my screen hoping that it’ll crack from the anger that I’m feeling. 

Who the fuck decided that it’s a good idea to email someone on a well deserved paid vacation for work? When you can simply just have the person in the next room do it?

Clearly, them. I huff out silently. In an office with fifteen writers, they decided that underappreciated workers should do the revising. I wasn’t alone in this.

They insist on having me work on it, obviously as I remember the 5 missed calls from the office. They have enough time to call me, why can’t they have the time to do it themselves?

“…Schatz?” 

I jump in response to the sudden call from Toto, my hands accidentally throwing the phone away. I curse beneath my breath before I reach for it, throwing it into my purse. 

His eyes are laced with curiosity, “Are you alright?”

I nod, now remembering I have a company. One that I’m supposed to be entertaining instead of taking the piss from Vogue. “I’m alright, how’re you liking the scone?” 

“It’s good,” he nods before he sets down the newspaper in his hand. “You have not touched your food yet.” 

Right. My hand reaches for the crumpet in my plate, my teeth digging into my breakfast as I chew quietly. My eyes are still staring elsewhere, and clearly it’s beginning to bother Toto because of the constant dissociation. 

“You’re not alright,” he deduces, making me nod in agreement. There’s really no point in denying. Throughout the beginning of our breakfast, I already told him about my work. He knows how miserable and pathetic my life is, and what did he do as he listened? He smiled kindly, his brows laced with concern, everything that I had seen from other people. But he listened, and I like him for it.

Not wanting to elaborate anymore, he notices how quiet I am and so he decides to say, “You were enjoying your research paper years ago, but you do not look like someone who’s been happy with your job for a while now. You should leave the company.” 

I pause, looking up at him. He does… “You remember me,” I watch him nod in confirmation as I continue, “you know who I am. From Dubai.” 

He only shrugs like I just asked him if the sky was blue. How can he sit here and act like it’s a normal Tuesday? Does he even know what kind of effect he had on me? This utter— he knows who I am and he doesn’t even mention it until now!

He doesn’t read my mind, but he explains, “You are an impressive woman. It’s difficult not to forget about you when you speak so passionately about writing and your courses back then.” 

“It was a short-lived conversation, was it not?” I ask him, wondering how he’d managed to remember that whole fifteen minutes. Those fifteen minutes of nothing but university work and exchanging questions felt like a long time. 

“I admit, it took me the whole day to figure out who you were,” he chuckles, making me smile. “The conversation we had was… memorable to say the least. But it turned foggy the moment I became Team Principal.” 

“You don’t need to explain yourself to me,” I laugh quietly, “If anything I feel bad for not asking for your name. Your teammate had done it for you. Torger.” 

He nods, recalling what he’s just talking about before I rattled off about Dubai. “But there’s just something missing from you now that you had back then…”

“…what is it?” Is he this observant? Has he stared at people for a while before telling them what he has noticed?  

“The smile on your face,” he answers, his voice showing nothing of emotion as he says, “you still have the passion for it but now… the smile isn’t there anymore. At least the one that goes from one ear to another.” 

I can’t even speak. Thank goodness he continues on, “Would you consider it a dream if everyone’s making it a nightmare?”

If the silence wasn't deafening before, I can barely imagine being talkative now. He holds my stare, his eyes softening at the sight. I look pathetic, I just know it. 

“I… I don’t even know,” I murmur, running my fingers through my hair. “It’s not easy to get away from the company. I’ve been writing for them and if I left then… I’ve no one to use as a reference… or even take my projects. Seeing as it’s under their license and all that.”

“Ah…” Toto replies quietly, nodding at the response. He leans forward, making me look at him as he says, “But between your ambition and health, I think that you should see your health off first. If they are making it hard for you, your goal is harder to reach.” 

My view of Toto Wolff just changed here. Me, sitting across from him with the pessimism that my life carried— I can see him in a new light. 

I can see myself in a new light. He isn’t wrong. How am I going to do well in my career if my employers are the exact reason why I’m miserable in the first place? How am I going to find inspiration if all I feel is isolated and locked up?

Why do I continue to act like they’d give me a chance? I’ve brought up the discussion of getting a promotion for two years, and my career is a discussion that they continue to put on hold. 

No fuck that. 

But still… I can’t quit my job, can I? How am I going to be a successful editor if I’m going to leave?

My inner dialogue clearly has an effect on behalf of Toto’s entertainment. His handsome smile, from what I gather is a rarity, appeared right in front of me as I gulped. Toto isn’t wrong. If I want to be better… just find a place who’s more than willing to help me. 

I reach for my tea as I ask, “How are you as handsome as you are good at giving out advice?” 

His chuckle melts the stress away for a second, his amusement becoming more clear as he continues to stare at me. Is this what they call heart eyes? Yeah I really don’t want to listen to Daniel or Lewis. 

“And how are you as beautiful as you are stubborn?” He asks back, making me giggle quietly as I sip on my tea. 

“It’s a requirement if you wish to oppose Christian Horner all the time,” I jest, “you can get away from trouble easily.” 

“I’ve seen it yesterday,” Toto sighs contentedly before he smirks, “I am more worried about being disarmed by your strong will and beauty instead of the higher up’s rules and regulations. I hope you’re not the one I have to face in case our teams get into an altercation. I do not enjoy losing to Red Bull, of all things.”

—

The restaurant, while it is in a secluded location by the Silverstone Park, was jam-packed by the time we left after finishing our breakfast. We need to head to the venue soon before Christian gets there. Then maybe I can shit on his life about being late. Maybe. 

But our arrival at the Silverstone Circuit was more chaotic. 

“Shit,” I curse out, grabbing my Red Bull ball cap from my purse and slipping it on. I can’t even see anything besides from the dark abyss that I called my purse, my hand trying to get a feel of my sunglasses. It doesn’t take me a while to find it and put it on, looking at Toto who’s already on his way out of the vehicle with his bag. Unbuckling my seat, I look at the passenger side as Toto swings it open. He gestures for me to come out, and I do so with a murmur of thanks. 

By the time I hopped out of the passenger seat of Toto’s Mercedes, I was already welcomed by the clicking of the cameras. Alongside the annoying noise are questions coming from journalists who wish to ask questions about the qualifying today.

Looking around, however, I notice that there are a certain amount of paparazzi that I grew familiar with. I knew them by faces. And knowing them, they didn’t want anything that had to do with the race weekend. I just went on a breakfast with a CEO and we’re already adding fuel to the fire that was the British media. I gesture at Toto to speed up his walk while we pass by the cameras and the questions. 

It’s either I gesture and he won’t understand or I drag him. But grabbing him by the arm will only cause an uproar in the gossip world. People are always thirsty for drama. Getting involved with me, a Hearth child (one that hasn't been on a date for a decade AND presumed to be the It Girl by the media), will only cause more stress on Toto’s behalf. I am not about to let him get through that.

But he doesn’t understand what I asked of him non-verbally, instead he turns around to provide quick answers to questions about today and what may happen tomorrow. I wait there impatiently, looking down on the ground as I wish to no longer gather more attention regardless of the amount of photos already taken of me by standing there. 

“What’s your relationship with Tilly Hearth?” 

“What are your thoughts about her job in Red Bull?” 

“Are you two dating?” 

“Toto!” The Mercedes’ PR assistant finally comes as she excuses herself, putting herself in between her boss and the cameras as she asks to have them step aside. Certain paparazzo finally looked at my direction, realizing that they haven't asked me anything yet. I gulped, already backing away from the scene.

The PR assistant tells them that Toto will have enough time to answer later on, but by the time that Toto turns back, I’m already speed walking to the Red Bull hospitality.

And it doesn’t end there. Daniel and Sebastian caught me walking from the direction of the dispersing crowd— where Toto was— and decided that this was their chance to tease me. 

Now I’m here with my phone in hand, Daniel still poking me at my side as I grumpily look at him. Apparently, seeing workplace romance is a rarity and so he’s taken this as an opportunity to tell me that he wants to see how my slow burn “relationship” with Toto goes. Relationship. Really!

My phone pings as Daniel perks up and asks, “That Toto?” 

I glare at him, “Don’t you even, Daniel.” 

“Tilly,” I turn around and face Christian. He gestures for me to follow as I wave at Daniel, telling him I’ll be back. 

Christian pulls me out of the garage as I cross my arms. Sensing my annoyance, he sighs as he reassures me, “I’m not saying anything—“

“—yet,” I interrupted him.

“But I arrived just about twenty minutes ago and there are journalists asking about you,” I frown at that. Surely he doesn’t mean… “And Toto. They said you two got here together?” 

Oh… of course. Yeah, he does mean the one thing that I hoped he wouldn’t bring up. 

“Did you see my Bentley parked outside?” I sarcastically reply. It’s too early for my behaviour, I admit, and it even pisses me off because I can’t be nice to him. But instead of allowing him to reply, I add, “It’s not much of a big deal, is it?”

“It is,” he shakes his head. “Some people are assuming you’re either working for Mercedes or that you’re spying on—“

“Oh for god’s sake,” I roll my eyes. “I am not, I promise. Why am I even swearing I’m not doing anything stupid? I don’t think whatever I do outside work is going to be reported to my father or something.” My hands will literally carry 20% of Red Bull. What makes them think I’ll do something stupid like sell my shares to other rivals?

“Yes but be cautious,” he says firmly, “because no matter how you’ve insisted you’re not doing anything, the media can turn it all around.” 

“I know,” I roll my eyes again, I think they’ll pop out of their sockets soon enough. “I grew up in front of cameras, Christian. British media, even. Those journalists outside were people that asked a lot of questions whenever I’m out and about.”

“So you understand how ruthless they could get,” Christian nods, sighing as he leans against the surface. “I trust you enough with PR, I don’t even know why I even pulled you out of the garage when you can handle the journalists on your own.” 

“Because it’s with Wolff,” I smirk, “you’re worried about me being snatched by him, aren’t you?” 

He scoffs, a chuckle escaping his lips as he says, “He’s not exactly subtle on taking interest in you and your skills.”

“Hm,” I nod, looking eyes moving along the people that walked down to their respective garages. “Don’t worry, he’s not going to be able to discuss any Red Bull-Mercedes business with me. Not unless I have been put to work for it.” 

“Good,” he nods again, “good. I would hate to be in the way of your… whatever it is.” 

Wow, he’s pretty kind. Maybe because he doesn’t want to lose his patience early this morning. Good.

I’m still standing there when I ducked my head, hiding my face away as Toto walks towards their garage with selected people from his staff. Sensing that he’s away, I look up to see Christian’s smug smile. For someone who doesn’t like Toto, he seems to be enjoying whatever’s going on. Maybe he’s getting a laugh out of this predicament because I was so irritated yesterday–seeing me in a flustered state today is a different story.

“Is that it?” I ask him, my nose scrunching up in annoyance. 

He nods and then says, “I’ll stop bothering you about him for now. But, I’d also like to know if you’d be interested in joining the Sky Sports hosts sometime today. You’ve done public speaking before, no?” 

I look at him funny. Remembering that I just started today, I felt the need to nod. Nobody knew about my masters. Did they? It doesn’t matter.

“If I have to be,” I shrug. 

“It’d be a good thing to bring you there,” he tells me, making me want to roll my eyes. Just a few minutes ago, this man was coming after me about Toto. “Daniel and Sebastian would definitely have a field day if you’re the one interviewing them. What do you say?” 

“Is it scripted,” I ask, “or do I have to improvise?”

“To avoid problems revolving bias, I’d say scripted. Unless you’ve a question of your own. Be as entertaining as you want. As long as it’s not going to tell people that you favour one team. I think Sky Sports just want you to be there for the post-qualifying interview.” Me? Just me? No one else’s communications liaison?

“What kind of stories do you tell them,” I frown suspiciously. Second day of work and everyone wants me in their team. He is clearly hiding something. He’s been making sure that I’m doing my job exactly how they want it. Wherever I went yesterday, he made sure that I was the one in front of the cameras. Now he’s asking me to interview the drivers post-qualification. He knows something that I don’t.

“You’ve been mentioned a lot for the past few months,” he starts, “during meetings, FIA, to be exact–”

“I have a lot of questions,” I say, my mouth opened due to the surprise. I was never told about FIA, and being the hot topic of their delegations. 

“Your father’s an executive,” he reminds me, “and I know that sounds like Red Bull, or Ferrari or even McLaren are under FIA’s list of favoured teams.”

I scoff, “He owns the competitors in question.”

“I know,” he agrees, “but he only has enough power in each team. He cannot ever interfere with how they operate.” 

At least he’s smart enough to do that. If he badly wants his legacy to continue, I don’t think corruption is the way to go.

“What about me? Why am I the discussion of your…meetings?” I ask, internally smacking myself for prying. I always claimed that I liked the feeling of suspense. I didn’t care for details except when I could see them with my own eyes. Now, I’m a child during Christmas - except I'm dreading what’s coming.

He gives me a straightforward answer, “Julius wants you to take control of his shares. He’s up for promotion in the FIA but he can’t just carry us and the other two in his arms without being accused of conflict of interest.”

Oh. 

Oh.

That’s interesting. 

Not only is he asking me to do his part at these events, but he’s also selling me out to his own company just so he can continue being who he is in the federation. Greedy. 

He didn’t get the memo when I said I wanted to pursue fashion and journalism. He continues to put me in these positions– WITHOUT consulting me. For fuck’s sake!

My lips tighten, wondering if I can say no for today. Technically, I can say no. But my people pleaser demon decided for me.

“I’ll be there,” I murmur, my chest feeling heavy as I breathe shakily.

“What where?” He asks, confusion written all over his face.

“Wherever they want me,” I say, already feeling exhausted and defeated, “just—just have someone take us there before anything.”

“You got it,” he nods, reaching out to pat my shoulder before he walks off. 

I look down on my phone and read the text from my supervisor.

“I know you have a part time job this weekend but I would really really appreciate it if you send in your piece so we can go through it together this Monday. Thx xx”

I’m going to cry. Then, after that, I’m going to get ready to put on a smile in front of the camera. Charm works for so many people, at least according to my mother. What she didn’t know, though, is that my charm doesn’t do much to my father.

Maybe if I put on my fakest smile, that’ll charm the pants off everyone. I don’t like the thought of working here, but with no choice, I only have to stand in front of the camera and pretend that I’m enjoying it.

Where’s Toto when you want him?

#toto wolff fluff #toto wolff fic #toto wolff imagine #toto wolff x oc #toto wolff #toto wolff fanfiction #toto wolff x y/n #formula one fanfiction #formula one fic #formula one imagine #formula one x oc #formula one smau #f1 imagine #f1 fluff #f1 fic #f1 x you #formula one x reader #formula one x ofc #mercedes amg imagine

[maehara-san]

𝙏𝙬𝙤 𝙛𝙖𝙘𝙚𝙨 𝙞𝙣 𝙙𝙞𝙨𝙜𝙪𝙞𝙨𝙚

pairing: katsuki bakugo x f!reader

plot: when someone you once called a friend turns their back on you, the least person you thought would see, ends up being the one to come to your rescue.

warnings: slight cursing, slapping

a/n: this is not proofread it was on a wim so beware

𝑳𝒊𝒏𝒌𝒔 ━ | 𝒎.𝒍𝒊𝒔𝒕 | 𝒅𝒐𝒏𝒂𝒕𝒆 𝒕𝒐 𝒕𝒉𝒆 𝒂𝒖𝒕𝒉𝒐𝒓 | 𝒎𝒐𝒓𝒆 𝒘𝒐𝒓𝒌𝒔 |

All you wanted was to have friends that you could trust and have a bond that's unbreakable.

And you did.

Àt least you thought you had until she became part of the picture.

Everything was fine at first, she was kind to you and everyone. Hell she grabbed everyone's attention within the minute she stepped in through the door.

The guys were fond of her cuteness and of course she was beautiful.

It was every girls dream to be adored and cared for by guys.

She never gave it a second thought to help out a classmate with studying or homework.

Your classmate was kind in all aspects.

Then it stopped.

"I'm going to need you to not come along next time, okay?" She smiled at you, but it was fake.

You chuckled, confused by her sudden statement. "I'm sorry―what?"

Her smile disappeared as her eyes changed into anger, "You heard me. I don't want you to be around us."

Now you had realized what she meant, all this time she was faking to be your friend.

"But why not―they're m―my friends too." You stuttered. "You can't just tell me that I can't hangout with them anymore."

Rolling her eyes she threw her head back. "Oh please!" Looking at you she continued her harsh words, "The last couple of times everyone has gone out they never once even stopped to walk beside you or asked for your input."

"Yeah cause I didn't need to add anything to it nor am I picky."

"Could you be any more blind?" She started to step forward making you walk back slowly. "You're not wanted. How many times do I have to make it clear to you?"

"You're just talking out of jealousy Aya―"

"Ha!" Aya laughed loudly throwing her head back again. "Me?" She pointed to herself then to you. "Jealous of of you? Of someone who has nothing and is nothing? Why on earth would I be jealous of a little insignificant, wannabe hero?"

Your back finally hit against a wall.

You tried speaking in a calm tone trying not to give her any satisfaction. "What did I ever do to you? Since day one all did was be was nice to you. Everyone was."

"Because," placing her hand on the wall she leaned into your face not giving you any space to yourself. "People like you don't deserve to be around people who are actually worth a damn. Everyone beside you and that mineta shouldn't be part of the hero course. You don't even have what it takes to be a hero. One single punch to you and you break like the fragile little twig that you are."

Tears were starting to brim in the corner of your eyes. You didn't understand how a person could hold such anger towards you for no reason.

"I―I am doing my best to become a strong hero, I never have asked for anyone's help." You spoke anger filling your veins. "I train every single day until midnight. I stay back to help my friends whenever they need help when all you do is get surrounded by guys and don't even move a single muscle!―"

A smirk formed on her lips as she stepped back, "There it is."

Looking at her confused you spoke. "What?"

"I knew you'd bring it up sooner or later." A content sigh escaped from her lips, she took out her phone and showed you the bright screen with a pause button. "Now I can let everyone know what you said about me."

Shaking your head slowly you spoke, "How can you be such a cruel person?..."

She shrugged, "I like taking care of those standing in my way. I've seen the way some of the guys look at you. I just want to take their attention off from someone like... well you. And onto someone like me instead."

Aya smiled proudly seeing how sad you had become, "If it helps you feel better I did think of you as a friend once."

You scoffed, "Please... tell that to someone who doesn't know your true colors."

"Whatever."

She turned to leave when she looked back at you again. "I'll be nice don't worry, if you reject every invite and ignore them then I won't show them the conversation. It's your choice."

Aya had a skip in her stepped as she happily held her phone in her hand.

You closed your eyes letting the tears fall out of frustration and pain. You tried to think back to everything you did that made her dislike you but nothing came.

Yes you and her weren't too close to call yourself best friends but it hurt. Knowing you saw her as a friend only for her turn her back on you.

After a minute or so you tried to calm down yourself and stop crying over someone that didn't matter. But it was so hard to feel okay.

"I'm fine." You muttered to yourself as you wiped away the tears with the back of your hand. "She's not worth any crying."

“What’s going on with you?” 

Your movement stopped as you heard footsteps approaching you from the hallway. 

Quickly you blinked away trying to dry the remaining tears as fast as possible. 

“Nothing.” 

“Then why are you leaking out of your eyes?” 

“It’s nothing for you to know about, Bakugo.” You replied turning your head and looking at him. “Aren’t you supposed to be training with Todoroki for your license exam?” 

He scoffed crossing his arms in front of his chest. “I don’t have any training today with that icy hot bastard.” 

“Well then good for you... I guess.”

You walked away from him and heard the same footsteps following you all the way to the living room. 

“Don’t walk away from me!” Bakugo exclaimed, “The conversation wasn’t over idiot.” 

“Well you weren’t but I was.” 

He was starting to feel irritated by your behavior, “What the hell happened that made you start crying of nowhere?” 

“Like I told you,” you answered. “It was nothing of importance... so just let it go alright?” 

“Was it that newbie?” 

You didn’t deny nor did you say anything else when he mentioned her, letting him know he was right. 

“So it was her,” he said. “What the hell did she do?” 

You were trying really hard to make sense about what his behavior. From what you have seen Bakugo never cared much except when it came to the ones he was close to which consisted of Sero, Mina, Kirishima, and Kaminari. 

You on the other hand, you barely spoke to him at times, unless it was a project or assignment that you had to do. 

Other than that you didn’t exchange much words but you didn’t dislike him either. 

“Hey, I’m talking to you.” 

As you reached main common room, you headed to the kitchen still not answering his question. All you hoped was that he would get the hint and leave you alone, you needed space to gather your thoughts, that was just the type of person you were. 

It took you off guard when you felt his hand wrap around your wrist stopping you in place. 

In a soft voice he spoke again, “Why don’t you want to tell me what happened?” 

The way his voice sounded brought you such a sudden peace, it felt like comfort to you. 

“Bakugo―“ 

A pair of feet were heard walking towards the kitchen and the door opened. 

“Oh.” 

The sudden feeling of dread then ran through your body hearing that voice once again. 

“I did not interrupt anything did I?” 

Even Bakugo himself got annoyed with her sudden presence, he let go of your hand and stood beside you.

“Did you need something?” He questioned. 

Aya shook her head, an irked expression was visible despite the smile she used to cover it up. 

“I was actually going to go ask everyone if they wanted to hangout today.” She explained getting slightly closer to him. “It’s Saturday after all and no one has plans. Why don’t you come and hangout with us, Bakugo?―” 

“No.” 

You had to roll in your lips to stop yourself from laughing hearing him reject her offer right away. 

“W―Why not?” Aya asked trying to not to break her perfect act. “I mean you didn’t have any training today―“ 

Bakugo looked at you from the corner of his eyes, seeing as you weren’t even bothering to look her way. 

“Y/n, are you going?” He asked ignoring the look on her face. 

Your eyes widened remembering what she had told you moments ago. Lifting your head you looked at Aya then at Bakugo. 

“No.” Looking away you made up an excuse just like how she wanted you to do. “I―I have some errands I need to do today.” 

“Then I’ll help you out with the errands.” Bakugo spoke. 

“What?” You and Aya spoke at the same time. 

“I mean it’s not like you’ll have anyone else to help you.” 

“Of course she does!” Aya exclaimed putting her arm around your shoulders. “Right? Y/n said she had asked a cousin of hers that’s in town to help out.” 

“I―uh.” 

“That’s fine by me, I can still help both of them out.” 

Aya was losing her patience by the minute, “Come on Bakugo I’m sure she will do fine without your help.” 

She nudged your shoulder trying to get you to agree with her. 

“R―Right,” you said. “I don’t have that many things to do after all―“ 

“We can make something to eat afterwards then.” He calmly said. 

Her on the other hand wasn’t having it one bit. “Come on Bakugo please?...” 

Letting go of you she went over to him and wrapped her hands around his arm. 

Batting her eyelashes at him she said, “I never get a chance to hangout with you... can’t we just go and hangout once?” 

You wanted to walk away on the spot. She was doing everything and anything to make sure she gets what she wants. And if Bakugo kept saying no she wasn’t going to let it go. 

Bakugo tried getting out of her grip but it tightened, pouting she added. “Do you hate me?...” 

In that moment someone else walked in through the door. 

“Hey! I’ve been looking for you, Aya.” Kaminari smiled. 

“Kaminari!” She exclaimed, “You’re right on time as always.” 

“Of course.” He smirked, “I always gotta be there for the beautiful girl of the class.” 

Blushing she said, “You’re so sweet.”

Kaminari gave her a toothy smile. “I came to grab Bakugo since the group wants to hangout. But what can I do for you my queen?”

“Well on that note I was trying to convince him to come and hangout as well but he kept rejecting me,” she frowned. “All I wanted was to invite him to relax for a day since he’s free.” 

“Come on Bakugo,” he said. “How can you say no to that cute face of hers?” 

Seeing how they were occupied with the conversation you decided to slip away. There was no use of staying in that same room where you weren’t wanted. 

All day you ignored the texts that came in from the group chat. The girls messaged you asking if you were okay but of course Aya had already answered for you. 

You didn’t know if you should have felt relieved she did that or hurt that they never messaged you privately to ask. 

Studying was the only thing that helped to take your mind off of it all. 

But even then your eyes were starting to give out and you would end up asleep any moment. A sigh escaped from your lips as you put your pencil down, rubbing your eyes to try and get the tiredness out. 

Your phone buzzed on the table as the screen lit up. It was a message from Mina asking if you wanted to join the movie night they had set up. 

Quickly you messaged her back telling her you weren’t feeling well and were about to go to sleep. 

As you got up off from the floor there was a knock on your door. 

“Come on Mina...” You mumbled yawning as you walked to open it. 

“Mina I’m a bit tired―“

Your body tensed up as you saw the person you least wanted to see at the moment. 

“What do you want, Aya?” you questioned leaning on the side of the door, feeling too tired to deal with her. “I did what you wanted me to do.” 

“It looks like it wasn’t enough,” she clenched her jaw staring daggers into you. “Bakugo did not bother staying long when we left.” 

Now it was your turn to chuckle seeing how things quickly turned against her. 

“What the hell are you laughing about?!” 

“At how hard you were trying to keep me away from everyone that even then he did not want to bother in being near you.” 

“Shut up! It’s not funny, you’re only pissing me off.” She retorted. “I told you I would send that recording to everyone if you did not do as I said.” 

“You’re kidding right?” You questioned, staring at her. “How is it my fault that Bakugo did not want to even be around you? I even told him no about him helping me out what more could you have possibly wanted me to have done?” 

“How about trying to convince him when he was there?!” Aya yelled. “You could have tried harder to get him to stay but nooo you had to leave like the little coward that you are!” 

“I’m the coward?!” You exclaimed leaning forward. “I am not the one threatening people because of how insecure you fucking feel!” 

She was taken back by your sudden outburst. “What? Now all of a sudden you have the courage to speak when you couldn’t earlier?” 

“Yeah cause I’m tired of people like you.” You answered. “I am exhausted by being near you. I do not understand how you can live with yourself acting like such a fake person.” 

“You’re just mad that I grab everyone's attention and not yours.” 

You shook your head leaning back against the door, “No I’m not mad. I just feel sad for you seeing how hard you have to act a certain way to be liked and be able to live like this. You’re actually lonely inside―” 

A stinging pain could be felt spreading across your cheek. You breathed out in shock, slowly your hand moved to touch your now red colored skin. 

"You have no right to speak to me that way." She gritted her teeth, "Someone like you has no idea how hard I've worked to make everyone fall for me."

Slightly turning your head you looked at her. "That just proves how lonely you are. You always envied everyone else and you never even bothered to check what was wrong with you. Always blaming everyone around you but yourself. That is what cowards do."

"You're going to regret that."

Her arm moved back as her hand went up in the air to let it hit your cheek again. But you raised your hand getting ready to catch stop her when someone else did it for you.

Aya froze in shock, realizing her facade had come to an end.

"This is why girls like you piss me off."

"Bakugo..." You mumbles.

He looked at you, his eyes softening for a second before they turned cold as his gaze landed on her.

"B―Bakugo I―I was only defending myself against her!" She exclaimed trying to make herself cry. "You should have heard all of the horrible things she said to me!"

Rolling his eyes, he harshly let go of her hand. "You can stop with the bullshit. I heard everything you fucking told her."

"What?..." She nervously spoke turning around to look at him. "I―I have no idea what you're talking about."

"Are you fucking kidding me?!" He raised his voice, "You can drop the stupid act of playing the victim. Just because you have the other idiots wrapped around your finger doesn't mean I'm the same as well."

The puppy eyes she had were now gone and replaced with pure utter rage. Her gaze moved between the two of you.

"How could you defend someone like her?!" She exclaimed pointing at you with disgust. "Y/n is a fucking weakling, I mean look at her! She doesn't even come close to being in the same level as you and me."

"I've seen how hard she's trained her ass off to get to where she is." His gaze moved over to you. "She still has room to improve hell no one is perfect in this world. Yet I never have seen her given up so easily with anything that comes her way. Y/n has determination and cares about those around her those are some of important things that you need to become a hero."

Your cheeks turned a bright red hearing him say all those nice things about you. It was a shock but it made your chest flutter with happiness.

Bakugo directed his attention back to her, "But compared to you, she's a a better hero. And if I had to choose I'd choose her over and over again. I'll be damn if I ever choose you even if you were the last person alive in this world."

That was the last straw that made her go over the edge.

"I can't believe you're acting like an idiot defending her!" She yelled. "I thought you were better but I guess you two are the same in the end! Just like everyone is here... you're all idiots!"

"Oh my god." He muttered in exhaustion, taking out his phone.

You and Aya looked at him confused until he showed the screen seeing he had been on the phone with Kirishima this entire time.

"You all heard that right?"

"Yeah... loud and clear." Kirishima spoke.

"Damn it." She muttered pushing passed him as her footsteps quickened down the hallway.

Once she was gone it was like you could finally breathe. Letting out the weight of her shadow go after all this time.

"Are you alright?" He asked taking a step closer to you. "How's your cheek?"

You looked down at the ground shying away from him. "I―I'm okay... I just have a slight sting is all."

"Your cheek is red." Bakugo mumbled.

As he inspected your bruised skin you couldn't help but glance at him. It was off putting how kind he was being to you since the beginning of this whole situation. He was never mean to you but you both never really talked more than you needed to.

You did admire him for how strong he had become the last couple of months. He had changed like people said but it was still something you hadn't grown accustomed to.

"There's some ice packs in the freezer you should use them to reduce the swelling."

You nodded "I will do that..."

Bakugo did not understand why he cared this much. You weren't annoying for any reason. He just saw you as a classmate someone he could talk with when it came to school work. But recently he couldn't help but want to get to know you more.

As he pulled away his cheeks turn red, realizing he had been too close to you.

Cleating his throat he spoke, "Are you sure you're going to be alright? Everyone already knows the truth so I'm sure they won't be mad at you at all."

"T―That's good to hear of course," you said. "I just― how do I say this... it's a surprise to see you acting this kind with me. When we only really interacted at school... or trained when needed to."

Looking away he tried looking for an answer himself. Why was he being this way towards you? Did he catch feelings for you when he didn't notice and until now he's realizing it?

"Look..." he sighed trying to think of what he wanted to say. "I wasn't going to stand by and let her mistreat you. I―I saw the way she acted with you earlier today and I didn't want you to think I was eavesdropping. I wanted to hear what happened coming from you not from her knowing well she was going to lie through it all to make you look bad."

"Why didn't you say anything?"

Looking at you he answered. "Cause I knew you were going to deny the whole thing. I heard she threatened you with that dumb recording. I wasn't going to stand by and let you get bullied because of that― Aya chic."

A small smile formed on your lips. "I'm taken back by your kindness honestly," you chuckled lightly. "I always thought you only saw me as a peer a―and maybe you do but― with the way you're acting it sounds like a friend."

A smile threatened to slip from his lips but nodded instead.

"I appreciate what you did for me, Bakugo. So thank you... for looking out for me."

"Idiot." He chuckled softly, "I did it because I can't stand that chic something was off about her since she got here."

"Right." You agreed, "That was most definitely the reason― which of course I'm glad!"

He looked passed you and saw your table was covered in books about math.

"That chic interrupted your studying?"

"Oh..." you looked over your shoulder forgetting about the mess. "Y―Yeah I was trying to look over some problems before the test."

"And is it helping?"

"Well... not much as I hoped it would."

"I kinda figured as much," he put his hands into his pockets. "I can help you out if you want. That chic already got figured out and I have nothing else to do."

"Are you sure?" You asked. "You already did a lot―"

"You should just say yes before I change my mind." He smirked slightly, "You could use someone like me."

"Okay then."

"W―What?" He asked flustered.

"I mean you're offering right?" You chuckled. "Would you like to study here or in the living room?"

"I'll bring my stuff over better everyone else is probably still in the living room. We'll get distracted and knowing how loud Kaminari is it won't be any help."

"You're not wrong about that."

"I'll be back then." He said. "I call dibs on this side of the table though."

This was a new side of him, one you hoped he will show you more often.

"Whatever you say." You smiled. "Just hurry up I need to study."

Bakugo turned around letting the smile grow, as he walked towards the elevator.

"Calm down, gees."

Walking back inside you closed the door. Smiling as you rested your back against it.

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⎯ one in nine realms [mini series] “chapter 5”

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▸summary: new dangers are at the door and heimdall is still making y/n irritated but their bond turn into something that not just y/n but also heimdall could not predict.

▸wc:  2.6k [a little bit short, yes, but has lots of process for the story and bond y/n and heimdall have]

▸warnings & tags: heimdall’s and y/n’s bond’s process, lots of touching, y/n’s power and identity being discovered further, odd and unfamiliar feelings, inner thoughts, a little rage from cocky heimdall, misunderstanding, protecting other’s life, mind reading, conflicts, unanswered questions, reaching the heart of the realm, pet names/nicknames, original creatures, heimdall begin to think (or using his brain in other words), being close

  Being the Goddess of Sun meant nothing to you. Not anymore. That y/n was buried under your skin, not feeling to break free anytime soon. Deserving the power your parents gave you was impossible. Yes, you helped so many innocent people, you saved them but no, you could not go back into that Goddess again whose only desire was to accomplish Odin’s orders, hurting innocent people without questioning. This wasn’t anyone’s fault but yours to carry, Odin gave you orders but you were the one who didn’t questioned them and fulfilled without hesitation, not seeing their pain.

Heimdall’s knowledge about it didn’t mean anything, not yet. He could ask about you to Odin if he wanted. However, that would be useless because no one can understand the other just by speaking those who encouraged to the other. Heimdall could not understand you by Odin or anyone else. He had to spend time with you, see you with his own eyes and decide what kind of a person you are with his own judgement. If he wants to do this, you will give him a chance because from Thor, Odin’s other son, you know very well how Gods can easily hide their own emotions and personalities from others’ eyes. Clearly, Heimdall was doing the same with his cocky attitude. It would be a lie if you said you don’t want to get know Heimdall better and further. You wouldn’t hide it either. How could you hide it from a mind reader anyway?

Speaking of evil’s name, you turned behind, looking at Heimdall’s moving eyes that was scanning the realm like it has began to mean something now. “So,” You caught his attention, making his eyes turn to your face which was becoming red for no particular reason. No, especially not from his charm. “You can predict every movement of others, right?”

He nodded proudly, “I’m not only predicting them. I am capable of avoid their movements with my fast reactions and speed.” Smirking, he crossed his arms on his chest. “How come you learn my abilities only recently? All of the realms know me honey.”

You rolled your eyes, keep moving forward, to a castle looking place that made of pure black iron and lava. “Maybe you just couldn’t catch my attention, hm?” Smiling, you said, “You are not everyone’s type Heimdall.”

“And what is the reason behind this?” His voice came from behind, closer now.

“Where should I start?” You began to give him reasons while counting them with your fingers, one by one, “A cocky attitude, endless ego, being Odin’s right hand man, seeing people from above, not being so charmi –“

“Ah, ah,” He warned with a playful tone and a smile on his face, standing right beside you, kneeling to your ears while keep walking, “Not the last one.”

Because of his sudden action, you stopped on your trial, making his left arm and chest hit your back with a ‘thumb’. He stopped too which made his body connect to yours, his chest was touching your back in other words. And oh, this was making you feel hotter. Again! If you were visiting the realm for the first time, you could blame it but no, you had spent your childhood years in this realm, not feeling hot for a single time.

You tried to move but something inside forced you to stay like that.

“What is it sunshine?” He said, smiling still, “Feeling hot?”

How he was making you weak on your knees like that? He didn’t have any right to make you feel like this. You met with him just recently but he already took a part from your life. More than you wish.

“Enough.” You said finally, breaking free from his purple eyes and taking fresh air after taking some steps forward to the castle. “It’s just I am turning back here after a long time. My body denies its heat, that’s all.” You wanted to add even if it sounded like a lie.

Not buying your lie at all, Heimdall smirked. Then, he surprisingly didn’t push it further. He just started to walk towards the castle.

As you began to follow his trial, some odd sounds came into your ears, alerting you. Something was coming to your direction and you could not put a name on it; was it another creature that giants made to attack the Asgard?

Heimdall stopped, looking at the sky. He now had a serious face which made you wonder what was coming more.

“Heimdall,” Your voice sounded more concerned than you wanted it to be, like you were feeling fear about Heimdall’s safety. He felt it too because he looked at you like you said a joke, not a funny one.

“No one can hurt me. I am not only one step but a hundred steps ahead of their movements.”

You rolled your eyes again, feeling anger a bit. “Really?” You asked, “Do you just trust your abilities? Your Godly power?”

He looked confused, “What else I would trust exactly?”

As unknown voices came closer, you stood in front of him, touching his chest, the place where his heart placed, if he had one, “This. The real power not comes from the Godly power you have.” You looked at his eyes, deeply, “It comes from the heart, the one who has not but only you. A heart is the one that makes us powerful.”

Keep looking at your eyes, Heimdall didn’t move, even if voices’ owners came into the scene.

You picked your arrows, those you made with using your power. You had to use a bit magic and your power if you wanted to go back to Atreus safely. If you were dead, who would help him?

With this question, you stood in front of Heimdall, shielding his body with yours with just pure instinct. You didn’t know why but one of the inner voices you had wanted you to keep him safe, no matter how much you hated his personality.

Looking at the sky, you saw three flying creatures whose wings were made of pure lava and had iron bodies. They were not too big but they had a great speed, making your eyes to turn from right to left rapidly, following their movements.

Their faces reminded you dragons. They looked like little dragons with mortal attitudes. By looking at their faces, you could see how angry they were. As they kept flying in front of the castle, you came to a conclusion; they were the protects of the castle and what buried in there. Probably your sword and other treasures. The one; a mortal, a giant or a god, stole all these treasures and kept them in the heart of the realm.

“Hey,” You tried to say to them, “I am here for my belongings. Can you show me your master? So, no one will be harmed from this visit?”

They looked at your, tilting their heads to left and right, then, they looked at each other like they were trying to make a sense and a decision.

“Really?” Heimdall asked from behind after a long time silence, “Can you not see they have not a brain at all? They are just some dummy creatures.”

The moment he finished his sentence, the three protectors looked at him and then, with a strong movement, they began to fly towards your direction while spiting fire with their mouths.

Pushing Heimdall’s body to other side to make you the main target of their fire, you joked, “Not too dummy to not understand you, clearly.”

As their fire collapsed to your body, traveling from head to toe, Heimdall shouted, “Y/n!”

Not seeing clearly because of non-stop fire on your eyes, you heard his broken voice. Did he feel concerned about you? Was he taking you this serious? And why you felt a sudden joy while being the target of fire?

All questions remained unanswered as creatures stopped suddenly. Opening your eyes, you saw how their attention was taken from you to Heimdall. He was stabbing one of the dragons, making it to fall to the ground soon enough.

As other two made their ways to Heimdall, you shouted without thinking twice, just wanting to catch their attention from him again, “Hey!” You picked up your fire arrows again, “Burn.”

Fire arrows made from your power and magic found their places on creatures’ bodies’ parts; heads, hearts, legs, and wings. Their skin began to burn like sun, making them scream in pain. You felt bad for them. They was just protecting the castle as their owner ordered but you didn’t want to get hurt. Not only you, but Heimdall too. You wanted to keep him safe.

“Keep me safe?!” Heimdall’s angry voice shouted from left, as the creature he killed turned to ashes as well as others, screams lowered ‘till there was no sound and hints of their presences. “You are keeping me safe?!” He shouted again, stood up from the ground, not giving any time to fix his clothes that had dust on them, “I am Heimdall! The son of Odin. I do not need a protection.” He stood right in front of you, looking so angry for the first time. You felt no fear but something unfamiliar. “Do you know what I am capable of?”

You waited him to continue, to split his poison out which would make him calmer but he just stopped, looking so angry but broken at the same time.

“Heimdall,” You said, avoid your wanting to touch his face, “I –“

You wanted to say how everyone, even those whose faith determined as untouchable, needed to be protect from others; from their own families, lovers, friends and much more. Everyone needed this, to feel love behind the protection. No, you didn’t feel love about him but you certainly were giving him some empathy and delicate emotions of yours, without your own control. This was heart’s doing, not minds. And he needed to realize this too. However, feeling odd, you couldn’t say a word. But deep inside, you knew he understood your actions because his eyes no longer held anger inside them, they began to hold something you could not put a name. Maybe, you didn’t want to. Not yet.

Turning to the castle, you said, “Let’s continue.” You were so empathic to him, even to your surprise. Not knowing what was making you like this has begun to make you crazy. Questioning it further had to be done in other time, probably not in this realm.

Ah, what an unpredictable journey you had with him.

  The realm had so much potential. No wonder why Odin didn’t like the realm at all. It had Surtur, giants-made creatures and a magnificent power. It had changed a lot since your childhood, after Odin’s reign. The realm you called as home now was so strange. No sound, just fire and lava with big mountains and creatures that wants to eat every living thing alive.

You even couldn’t remember a memory of places because of their changes. You could not tell which place was looked like before. How you missed your early life; parents on your side, a place to call home, friends to have a special bond, a power to hold, and beauty of the realm. However, knowing that missing them will not give you anything in return, you just focused the purpose of your visit to the realm that was not your home anymore.

“The heart of the realm.” You said, touching the surface of great gates, protecting the castle from visitors.

Not touching it, Heimdall said, “There is no sound behind.”

Even if you trusted his hearing ability, giving him a power to hear every sound from all realms as he claimed, you put your left ear to the surface of the gates, looking at him while doing it, “No.” You said to him, not breaking your gaze. “There is something in there. Not dead, not alive. I can feel it.”

“How?” Heimdall asked, “How can you hear something I do not?”

You smiled poorly, taking his hand on yours, you pulled his body to yours. Feeling surprised from your action as always, he tried to say, “What are you do –“

“Shh!” You made him stop speaking. Putting his hand on the surface, not taking your hand back from his, you said, “Put your ear to the surface.”

It took him a few seconds to do what you asked, putting his ear on the gates’ surface with a hesitation.

You faces were standing so close to each other, eyes connected like hands, warmness flowing from a body to another, making you two feel something both odd and unfamiliar but good at the same time. Like a lovely tickle on your skin, the one you don’t want it to go.

“Listen.” You said with a low tone, waiting him to listen.

He gave it a few seconds but stopped doing it, rolling his eyes, he said, “I can’t hear shit.”

You rolled your eyes as well but kept your patience. “Because you listen it with only your ears.” You tightened your touch on his hand, making him look at your connected hands and to your eyes again. “Listen with both your ear and,” You pointed to his heart with your eyes, “Heart.”

As he put more attention to it, you smiled, “Close your eyes.”

Knowing he would not close his eyes if you kept looking at him like that, you closed your eyes firstly. Giving him a hint that you had no bad intentions even though he probably could feel your intentions clearly.

While seeing just an endless black void, you continued, “Just feel it.”

Feeling him closing your eyes without being able to look at him, you tried to hide your smile even if you knew he couldn’t see.

His hand moved a little bit, warmness began to increase its heat, no sound but just yours and his heart beats made you feel enjoy. Putting your attention from him to the feeling that radiated from the other side of the gates, an orange trial began to emerge from your feet to inside. Following it, you saw how trial traveled from right to left of the castle, passed three doors slowly, reaching its destination; a tree that was not alive and not dead. The heart of the realm. Holding a great power on it. The tree your parents married under, the tree you born in front of, the tree that give the sword that has your family’s legacy and power on it, and the tree that gave the realm its vividness.

Opening your eyes, you saw Heimdall’s still closed eyes. He really put his attention to it, listening you well. While he continued to feel the tree; hearing, feeling and seeing it, you watched him. You watched how his eyebrows furrowed because of concentration he put, how his lips shook a little because of the tree, how he looked so pure and innocent while discovering something he found now. Looking at his features, you thought how he looked good with purple eyes that held eternity on them, braided gold hair that making you want to touch them and pink lips that you want to k-

He opened his eyes, looking at you directly, not giving away his own thoughts. His sudden action make you realize what you were thinking about him just now. You would say something you didn’t want if he didn’t open his eyes. You don’t want it, do you?

Keeping his gazes on your face, not moving at all, he made your body shake in disbelief. Disbelief of your own wanting.

“Y/n,” He said with a voice that touched you entirely from head to toe, from outside to inside, “What do you want?”

Yes, y/n – You said to yourself; What do you want?

TO BE CONTINUED.

taglist: @iinterdimensionals , @Konigdi1ks0ck , @onlydeas​ , @hayleethefrog​ , @tartagliasrighthand​ , @whywouldiknowsstuff , @importantvoidpolice​ , @itsnat-bitch​ , @armanibxtch​ , @dott-up​ , @chiyausu​ , @lokigirlszendaya​ , @potentplant​ , @milf-to-be-anny​ <3

thanks for reading and commenting/sending messages! you are making me so happy and joyful. I really appritiate your liking on the story. you are wonderful, every one of you! stay safe, stay happy. <3

#masterlist #gow #gow: ragnarok #god of war #god of war: ragnarok #heimdall #gow heimdall #heimdall x y/n #heimdall x reader #heimdall x f!reader #kratos #mimir #freya #atreus #brok #sindri #odin #y/n #original character #original creatures #god of war heimdall #games #written by me #vom #rose #<3 #thanks for reading this #^^ #mini series #game stories

[jenniferjareauwife]

Carina x reader based on the song Sara by we three

Sara

pairing: carina deluca x fem reader

category: hurt/comfort, fluff

warnings: self harm, suicide attempt

word count: 964

summary: based on sara by we three

"Seriously bambina you need to stop drinking." Carina snatched my beer from my hand and threw it in the trash. "It's not good for you."

"Well the air gives you cancer but we still breathe."

"You know what I mean." I sighed and leaned back against the couch, licking my lips and trying to clear my mind now that the alcohol was gone. "Next thing I know I'm going to find you in bed smoking weed!" She angrily fluffed the pillows but I didn't react, just stared ahead.

"It was just twice."

"Bambina? Seriously?" I finally looked to her, seeing the hurt and shocked look on her face. "Did you learn nothing from health class in school? Or from me? Come on bella, you know better."

"Weed isn't even that bad." I scoffed.

"I am not having this conversation." She stroked out of the room and slammed the door to our bedroom. I slumped down on the couch and pulled a blanket over me, guess I was sleeping on the couch tonight.

I could hide the cuts well as long as I wore long sleeves which was everyday now. Carina didn't expect anything, thank God. I didn't know how I would explain that to her. "Bambina! I'm home!" She sounded happier than normal which surprised me but I liked to see her that way.

"Hi." I got pulled into her arms as soon as she saw me. "What's up?"

"I delivered three babies today and they were all healthy and their mommies all lived too." She kissed my forehead. "It was a very good day." I smiled but it didn't quite reach my eyes. I was glad she was having a good day but I hadn't had one in so long, I was kind of jealous. "Bella what's wrong?"

"Nothing."

"Bambina..."

"It's nothing. I promise." She frowned but nodded, knowing better than to press the issue.

"Well...talk to me if you need to, ok?" I nodded and smiled.

"Thanks."

I scribbled down some words for Carina to explain to her why I was doing it. I did feel a bit bad, but she deserved so much better than me and if I was finally out of the way then she could find the person she was meant to be with. I was in everyone's way. There was no point to me being here, nothing was enjoyable anymore and no one loved me except for Carina but she could move on.

I slit my wrists cleanly as I heard the front door open, cutting deep. She wasn't supposed to be home yet I still had a few hours. "Bambina where are you? I've called you ten times!" Shit. I watched the blood pour onto the ground but I didn't try to stop it. I heard her start to walk upstairs and my heart dropped. "Bambina are you in there?" She stopped outside the bathroom door and knocked a few times. "Y/n?" I didn't answer. "Y/n are you in there?" She knocked more frantically now.

My vision was starting to get a bit blurry and she was trying to knock down the door, knowing that something was wrong. "Bambina, open the door!" The door finally giving in was the last thing I heard before eveyrhing went black.

I woke up in a bright room, hearing a steady beeping sound to my right and small sobs to my left. "You're awake." I heard Carinas broken voice so I turned my head. "Why'd you do it?"

"Hm?" I blinked slowly.

"Why'd you try to kill yourself?"

"I..." Her eyes softened as I struggled to come up with the words.

"You don't have to answer now bambina...I...I just want to know why...why you felt like you had to do it." I turned my head to stare at the ceiling, not knowing how to word it. I didn't want to tell her that I just needed to put an end to the pain because the distractions weren't doing it for me anymore but that was depressing and I didn't want her to be more concerned than she already was.

"I'm sorry."

"I know you are bella." She squeezed my hand. "You really scared me, you know that?"

"I'm sorry."

"Stop apologizing."

"But I have so much to apologize for."

"Don't apologize for how you tried to get rid of your pain." My lips quivered as I tried not to cry. "And it's ok to cry." She sat down on the bed next to me. "You're allowed to cry. You're allowed to bella-"

"But I don't want to."

"Holding it back only makes things harder. When was the last time you cried?"

"Six months ago."

"Bambina..."

"I know...not good." I leaned into her, hugging her arm.

"I just want you to be ok."

"I want to be ok too, I want that so bad." I sniffled as a few tears fell.

"You can be ok, but you can't use unhealthy coping mechanisms and expect to be ok." My bottom lip trembled and I nodded. "I'm going to help you as much as I can, ok?" I nodded and let out a sigh of relief as she pulled me into a hug.

"Thank you so much."

"You're welcome bella." She ran her fingers through my hair, kissing the top of my head. "I want to be here for you."

"I need that."

"Yeah?" She gently massaged my scalp.

"I'm sorry for not asking you for help earlier."

"Y/n. Do not apologize." I nodded into her neck, hugging her tighter, so glad that I would be able to hug her as much as I want, that I didn't actually die. "I love you so much. I will be here for you every step of the way."

"I love you too."

#carina deluca x reader #carina deluca #station 19 #x reader #lgbtq #wlw post #carina

[letitiaslabyrinth]

DIDN'T DESERVE

A/N: this did not turn out the way i expected it too at all. anyways ignore all mistakes cause this aint proof read word count: 1.7k+

“Shuri, how come you ain’t tell me where you was last night?” Shuri's girlfriend, Imani said, irritation in her voice.

Shuri shrugs. “I was with Riri-”

Imani rolled her eyes and scoffed. “Of course you was with her. The two of yall might as well date with the amount of times yall see each other.”

“Baby, what are you talking about?”

“You spend more time with your,” She makes air quotes, “‘best friend’ than you do your girlfriend, Shuri. You don’t see an issue with that?”

Shuri was confused. Yeah, her and Riri spent time together but they didn’t spend that much time together, right? Whether the answer was yes or not, Shuri loved Imani and would choose her over anyone and everyone.

“I’m sorry, Ima. I’ll spend more time with you, I promise. How about we go on a date tonight?”

Imani brushed her off, still annoyed. “I don’t wanna go out, Shuri, I want you to stop hanging out with Riri. Period.”

“Okay,” Shuri says with no hesitation. She wants to make her girlfriend happy and if that means she and Riri can’t hang out anymore then so be it.

“Good.” Imani kisses Shuri on the forehead and goes to the bathroom.

Shuri’s phone goes off twice. They’re messages from Riri. Shuri doesn’t bother reading them when she types: “We can’t hang out anymore.” and blocks Riri’s number. It stung her heart a little bit but what else could Shuri do? Imani’s her first girlfriend and she just wants to keep her happy.

Shuri gets up from the couch and goes to the kitchen. She opens the pantry, taking out a bag of Doritos and opens the fridge, taking out a carton of juice. She pours some in a cup before putting it back and making her way to the living room. She sets her snack and drink down and turns on the T.V. She falls asleep waiting for Imani to come out the bathroom.

When Shuri wakes up, she can feel a hand running through her hair. She looks up and it’s Imani.

“You sleep good?” She asks.

Shuri hums, stretching slightly. “What time is it?”

Imani checks her phone, “6:32, why?”

“I have a meeting with the council at 7.” Shuri groans and gets up slowly. She finishes her juice from earlier and kisses Imani on the forehead. “I’ma go get ready. I’ll see you later tonight?”

“I made plans so prolly not,” Imani says and goes back on her phone.

Shuri’s the first one in the throne room, as usual, but Riri was close behind her.

“Shuri, can we talk?” She says, pulling Shuri to the side.

“No. Didn’t you get my text?”

“No, I did, I’m just wondering why I got it. And so outta the blue, too. Did something happen?”

“Nothing happened, Riri. I just don’t want any kind of relationship with you that isn’t strictly professional. Aren’t we only supposed to be colleagues, anyway?”

“Seriously? Shuri, you can't be serious right now! Are you at least gonna tell me what I did?”

Shuri notices some of the Elders coming in. “Leave it alone, Williams. I’ve said what I’ve said.” She walks away and sits on the throne, waiting for the other Elders to come in. 

They discussed the safety of Wakanda, the Panther and Ironheart suits, and the new buildings that were being constructed in Wakanda. Then Shuri went to the lab to work for hours.

It was around 11pm when Shuri made it back to her and Imani’s place and she was tired. She was expecting to find Imani in bed but she had forgotten that she said she’d made plans. The apartment was dark and lonely without another person there. Shuri didn’t like it. She turned on all the lights and put on a random show for some background noise while she took a shower. It was 11:30 when she was done. She was so exhausted from today that she didn’t even bother changing into clothes. Once her body touched that bed, that was it, lights out. 

“Shuri!” Shuri wakes up to Imani shaking her. “The bed is wet because of you! How am I supposed to sleep!?”

“The couch,” Shuri deadpans. Imani waited for Shuri to say she was joking but she wasn’t. It’s not like there was anywhere else for her to sleep other than on the couch.

“Why don’t you sleep on the couch?” Imani says, rolling her eyes.

Shuri groans and sits up on her elbows. She looks at the clock on her bedside table then back at Imani. “It’s 2 in the morning right now, Ima. I am tired. There’s no point in me moving when you’re the one complaining. You said the ‘whole bed’ is wet so go sleep on the couch.” And with that, she turns her back to Imani and goes back to sleep, ignoring the angry muttering from her girlfriend.

It had been about a week and a half since Shuri told Imani to sleep on the couch that night but Imani took it personally and has been sleeping on the couch ever since. Shuri didn’t even remember what she said since she was so tired but she assumed it was bad since her and Imani have barely even been talking unless they absolutely have to.

“Are you hungry?” Shuri asked Imani from the kitchen. No response. Shuri rolled her eyes and went over to her girlfriend, standing in front of her. “Can you just tell me why you’re ignoring me?”

“No.”

“Why not?”

“Because you should remember. It’s not my fault your memory is shit.”

“And it’s not my fault that you’re having this one-sided ass fight over something I don’t even fucking remember, Imani. We're dating, aren’t we? We’re supposed to be able to talk to one another when we have issues but instead you're pushing me away and ignoring me.”

“You were rude and inconsiderate, Shuri. You slept in the middle of the bed, with your towel on, making the bed wet, and then you told me to sleep on the couch.”

Shuri sat down, rubbing her eyebrow. “So, where exactly were you planning on sleeping, again?”

“What?”

“I mean, I’m just saying. From what you just told me, the entire bed was wet, somehow, so where did you actually plan on sleeping?”

“It’s not what you said, Shuri, it’s how you fucking said it. You didn’t even care about me enough to sleep on your side of the damn bed.”

“I was in a meeting from 7 to 11 pm, Imani. I was tired and you woke me up to complain so my bad for my tone?”

“Oh, please, what’s oh, so, tiring about sitting down and talking about things that need to be fixed or done in Wakanda?”

“It wasn’t just the meeting, Imani. I also had to go to the lap and fix some things on my and Riri’s suit-”

“Oh, really?” Imani scoffed, “So, what? Riri can’t fix her own damn suit now?”

“She doesn’t live here, Imani. She came here for one week for personal reasons, not to work.”

“She could’ve carried the suit behind her and worked on it from that scrappy lil garage of hers in Chicago.”

“I told her months ago that her suit cannot leave Wakanda, which you would know if you actually listened to me when I talked.”

“I listen when you talk, Shuri. It’s you who never listens to me and what I say. The fact that you’re still doing ‘favors’ for Riri proves that.”

“Excuse me? Me fixing the very creation that I helped her make isn’t me helping her. Me and Riri haven't even spoken since I told we can’t hang out anymore, so you can go somewhere else with that misinformation.”

“I don’t appreciate this tone of yours.”

“And I don’t appreciate how you’ve treated me like shit our entire fucking relationship,” Shuri starts, “Everything you ask of me, I do, and I mean everything, Imani. But it’s like, no matter what I do for you it’s never enough. You told me to stop hanging out Riri and I did but you just have to find a reason to get pissed off about something that barely even fucking concerns her and it’s irritating. You might as well be obsessed with the girl with the way you know so much shit about her and me.”

Imani stands up. “Shuri, if you keep talking to me like I’m one of your little fan girls, you gon lose me as a girlfriend, I promise.”

“Nobodys stopping you from leaving,” Shuri shrugs. She’s been through too much bullshit from this woman to even care anymore. “Leave.”

Imani scoffs and goes to pack her things.

“Leave your key on the way out, too,” Shuri says, getting up and leaving.

Today was the last day Riri was in Wakanda and Shuri had to make things right before she lost the best friend she’s ever had in her life. 

Shuri knocks on Riri’s door, thankful that she hadn’t left yet when she heard her say, “One minute!” Riri opens the door a few seconds later, her face dropping immediately when she realizes it was Shuri. 

“What do you want?” Riri says, folding her arms across her chest.

“I wanted to apologize.” Riri’s face softens slightly. “I shouldn’t have chosen Imani over you, especially when I’ve known you longer than I have her. I know what I did was stupid, Ri, and I’m sorry. Imani was my first girlfriend and I was willing to do anything for her love and her approval, even if that meant cutting out the best thing that’s ever happened to me. You didn’t deserve to be ghosted by me like that and I should’ve explained things weeks ago at the meeting but I was scared Imani would find out and break up with me and I know that’s no excuse but I really am sorry, Riri.”

Just as Riri was about to speak, another voice came from inside her room. “Ri, who is it?” They yell.

“No one, Aniyah!” She yells back. Riri turns back to Shuri, “I appreciate the apology, Shuri, I really do, but you’re a week too late. I don’t want anything to do with you after what you did.” And with that, she closes the door, leaving Shuri rethinking her entire life choices.

#shuri udaku #shuri #princess shuri #shuri x oc #lil bit of shuriri but its angst #shuri's blind by her first gf #riri #riri williams #black panther #lesbian #black wlw #angst with an unhappy ending #letitiaslabyrinth

[rhyaxxyn]

writeblr resurrection (mind the gap, i'm still filling the grave back in)

about rhyaxxyn…

❂ my name is rhyannyn (ree--uh--nihn), but i go by rhys or rhyn

❂ she/her

❂ 21. last time i was here, i was totally 19 (maybe?)--and now I can do adult things??

❂ infp/infj - t  |   leo sun... i don't know what that means anymore, but i am ambitious to an awful extent, and creative to the point i feel like i'm dragging ideas around by their throats 24/7

❂ of native american and polish ethnicity. unfortunately i didn't grow up very connected to my native american culture so i don't claim it in my books though i do include aspects here and there (just little things i remember my dad telling me as a kid), but a lot of my polish heritage shines through in my writing.

❂ i work customer service and it drains me--but i love all my coworkers and would do anything for them

❂ i'm pretty sure when i wrote my last writeblr intro i said i love mac and cheese. things have changed for the worse and now i'm very allergic to dairy. tragic, i know.

❂ per usual, my little mentally ill bones give my writing inherent spice

❂ i have a partner (everyone clap), and he has thankfully made me realize how toxic some of the relationships i used to write are :D so many of the couples you may have seen if you've been following me for a while are OUT. but you know what's in? my sweet meow-meow boys. just you wait.

what do i write?

❂ many of my works are religiously inspired or have religious themes. yes i used to be catholic. yes it sucked. now i tear down those systems which took advantage of me in my works.

❂ i still don't write yucky relationship dynamics, especially now that i realized that I DID. but, i do write women who stand up for themselves, i write girls who discover that they deserve kind lovers, and i write men who aren't incompetent when it comes to the women they love. and being queer and dating a queer person, i write healthy wlw, mlm, and nonbinary inclusive relationships.

❂ i love complex characters. i love main characters who do awful, terrible things that are justified by the outcome. I love antagonists who fight against the protagonist because they've only seen the terrible means. and i love haunted characters who are stuck in cycles of evil which they see no way out of.

❂ in the regards of genre, i still only write fantasy. in variations, of course, but i'm a beast of habit

here's what you came for; the WORKS IN PROGRESS >:)

In the wake of a god being mysteriously killed, the Nameless War has waged between the gods and humanity for fifty-eight years, killing that which is mortal and immortal, and creating constant battles for territory between the divine Creator military and the human Revolutionists. As hope for future peace between the species wanes, the fate of the war lands in unlikely hands.

Pandora, a goddess, the lost creator, nameless and chained to the Earth because of duty, yet still running from her true power.

Quinn, a god, the skijic and Creator High General, desperate for the memories of a life lost and the familiarity of a purple-eyed goddess.

Natia, a girl, heiress to one of the Republic of Valentulus’s most powerful cities, and slave to the Revolutionist Snake General.

Loyalties whither, fear awakens, and stories collide as the Nameless War reaches its tipping point. It is up to Pandora, Quinn, and Natia, each of them sworn against one another, to challenge the boundaries of their duties—and their pasts. The only thing that might change their opposing fates is the truth, letting the past fly free could very well set the darkness loose.

Infinite Tangents rewrites the definition of divinity, the gods of legends remembered and lost no more than a species without a home. The fight between deities and humanity is made equal, and the fate of the universe unsure.

Billions of years prior to the events of Infinite Tangents, the planet of Kaleis, and the Kaleidoscope Suns' kingdom is in the peak of its power, guarded by her Divine Majesty Heather and her Phantom Suns. However, in the wake of an attack on the Light God's holy temple, they come face to face with the dark, and the reality that the universe will always call for balance.

Now Heather must navigate the dark, the light, and the truth that good, evil, demonic, and divine may not be so easy to define as she led herself to believe.

All empires must fall, but how much of herself must Heather lose in the process?

Aita Hunt is a ruinsome, good for nothing orphan. With no one to rely on in Requiem, one of twelve glass Orbises launched into Earth's orbit in the wake of its enigmatic destruction, Aita suddenly finds herself fallen into a world of politics, deception, and magic which has little to no patience for a girl who is changing the world by mistake. Bound to love the man who abandoned her; bound to kill the woman with enough money to buy Aita's assassination--she must be scrappy, and quick-witted, and foolish enough to take any handouts offered to her.

Even those given by her makeshift god and Teller of the Requiem.

Aita has never known her odds to be fair, never known a kind touch since her mother drifted into her eternal sleep, but even if it is a dangerous, powerful man granting her a chance to survive, she'll take it.

And if she must be more ruinsome than her divine masters can take, Aita will learn to pray for forgiveness.

(applause here)

if you've made it this far and would like to watch me struggle and scream into the void and hopefully finish these projects, i'd really love a reblog/comment/follow so i can reach out and follow back. seeing others write and pursue their passions pushes me to pursue my own. plus, i love having new writer friends who enjoy void-screaming too.

well then friends, that's it... sort of. i have plenty more ideas to spout at you all but these works will be my main focus. unfortunately for those of you who followed me in the ancient days and are now watching me claw out of a grave like a disgruntled corpse, i will have to pull a bit of content for Infinite Tangents and the world of The Natural Orders in general. for good reason though, as i've started researching literary agents in the hopes of publishing the first book! yayyyy :')

all of this is very daunting, and horrifying, and so much as looking at my list of agents makes me feel like i wanna throw up--but i do remember and am so thankful for the support of everyone who i so much as came across on the writeblr community. without y'all i wouldn't even be trying, so thank you.

to anyone who does remember me, welcome back to my page and sorry for the metaphorical dust. things will get clean i promise. and to anyone new, intrigued, or even skeptical about the crazy things i come up with, please feel free to follow or question me. though, i don't promise the answers will make much sense either.

#writeblr #new writeblr #writeblr community #writers of tumblr #writer #tumblr writers #wip intros #writing intro #authors of tumblr #fantasy #scifi #books #wips #wip intros to come soon #also sorry for the length intro i don't know how to be concise #its an issue #and also why all my word counts end up around 150k #cause i like suffering i guess...

[astrronomemes]

THE PERKS OF BEING A WALLFLOWER: STARTERS

a collection of quotes, phrases, and sayings from the 2012 film, The Perks of Being A Wallflower. change & alter as needed.

"I just need to know that people like you exist."

"My name is [name]. You call me [name], or you call me nothing."

"They say if you make one friend on your first day, you're doing okay."

"If my English teacher is the only friend I make today, that would be sort of depressing."

"If my parents ask me about it, I probably won't tell them the truth, because I don't want them to worry that I might get bad again."

"I am both happy and sad, and I'm still trying to figure out how that could be."

"He's still trying to shag that waitress from Olive Garden."

"This is [name]'s first party ever, so I expect nice, meaningful, heartfelt blow jobs from both of you."

"I'm really sorry. That sounded like a compliment in my head."

"[Name], you have such pretty [color] eyes. The kind of pretty that deserves to make a big deal about itself. You know what I mean?"

"I'm sorry I haven't written for a while, but I've been trying hard not to be a loser."

"She also steals jeans from the mall. I don't know why, because her family is rich, but I'm trying not to be judgmental."

"Don't make yourself small. You can't save anybody."

"We accept the love we think we deserve."

"Look at you in that suit. You're like a sexy English schoolboy."

"I just want to make sure that the first person who kisses you loves you. Okay?"

"I have to congratulate you for being happy, because you deserve it."

"[Name], do you ever think that if people knew how crazy you really were, no one would ever talk to you?"

"You see, [name] is a really nice person under the part of her that hates everyone."

"If you touch my friends again, I'll blind you."

"Oh, my god, my life is officially an after-school special. Son of a bitch!"

"You're the best teacher I've ever had."

"Pretty soon, you'll have a whole new group of friends, and you won't even think about this place anymore."

"I just want you to be happy."

"You can't just sit there and put everybody's lives ahead of yours and think that counts as love."

"We can't choose where we come from, but we can choose where we go from there."

"You're not a sad story. You are alive."

#rp meme #roleplay meme #rp starters #roleplay starters #dialogue prompts #rp prompts #roleplay prompts #rp memes #roleplay memes #sentence memes #sentence prompts #sentence starters