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seerofmike · 4 years

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i feel like a huge portion of kpop fans are gay fetishists attracted to the idea of quote unquote feminine men and thats why theres so much bullshit

YES okay. okay let me rant for a minute. let me preface this by saying i am NOT a kpop shipper at ALL. this is going to be long so i’ll put it under a’ ‘read more’ because i’ve been holding it in for TWO FUCKING YEARS BABY!

being mlm in boygroup kpop fandom is literally so exhausting. 99% of the people who ship real life human men from boygroups are fetishists and i will tell u why

obviously we all know of a ship in a fandom where the characters' personalities are twisted to fit the heteronormative view of "top" and "bottom" --one character is hypermasculine (top) and the other one is feminine (bottom). there are typical traits associated with both. the ‘top’ is scary or mean or angry or serious while the ‘bottom’ is emotional or bubbly or shy. while this is egregious, at least its fictional characters. their personalities can be simplified or exaggerated and it doesnt cause any real life harm.

im going to define what i think of as a fetishist: a non-mlm person who overly sexualizes gay men/men they think are gay/gay ships, and forces them into heteronormative roles for their own pleasure. its not even limited to cishet women. plenty of non-mlm lgbt people do this too and its like disheartening. so anyways

enter the kpop fandom

i may be incredibly biased here because one of the most affected members [of bts] is my favorite kpop boy, but oh god is the ‘personality change/simplification’ thing AWFUL here. i do not go out of my way to find fanart or see fanfic threads, but being in the bts fandom, u will inevitably see it and i REALLY wish i didnt

so anyways. my favorite boy ever is hoseok. he is sweet and hardworking and very passionate about dance and he can be serious when needed, but ultimately he tries to be very lighthearted and will consistently laugh or make jokes or do something funny when the other members feel uncomfortable or awkward (mostly during english-speaking interviews). he kisses the members on the cheek a lot/hugs them a lot/cuddles them a lot [this is important for later okay]

of course, theres a lot more to him because he is a multi-faceted real life human being, and i don’t know him personally, but that’s a general idea of what he’s like, okay?

SHIPPERS will have you think differently. some video got popular on youtube ""proving"" that hoseok is a sadist (which is just clips of him jokingly playfighting with the younger members), and the video depicts him as secretly mean and serious, and shippers will use that to say "hoseok is a total top!" and then most fanart or imagines or fanfic threads you see are top!hoseok, using this imagined 'hoseok is a sadistic dom' narrative to fuel their fiction, because SOMEONE has to be the top, so they twist him into this hypermasculine mean person (and probably feminize the 'bottom' of their ship but more on that later)

EXCEPT it is not just fiction. this narrative bleeds into REAL LIFE. you have new armys who dont know anything about the shipping scene, and yet somehow the narrative of hoseok being a secretly mean, sadistic person has already made its way into them. in real life, hoseok likes rainbows and wearing nail stickers and putting glitter in his hair. yet people in the fandom will say shit like "hoseok hates femininity" "hoseok would never wear [thing] because he's a dom"

sometimes on twitter you have ppl like me who say uh actually you guys are really weird and this is fetishy and in real life hoseok is very nice and not sadistic at all, you will UNDOUBTEDLY get comments like "omg hoseok isnt cute/nice when will yall learn he’s secretly like [x] and [x]". you could post a video of hoseok with a puppy titled "wow cute" and u will get like 2 clowns in ur comments going 'hoseok isnt CUTE hes a sadist’ . i wish i was joking but i am not. they will do this for EVERY action hoseok does. he cannot blink without people twisting it into a sexual thing

[also, side note: its funny that, since hoseok is one of the least popular members and therefore one of the least shipped members, he is often the odd man out among pairings, and is assigned 'the straight one' by default, and 9 times out of 10 people who assign him 'the straight one' do all this 'dom daddy hoseok' shit.

which just goes to show that this is indeed a matter of heteronormativity.]

so anyways arguably the most popular ship with hoseok is with yoongi, sope. this absolutely happens to other ships probably but im just using them as an example because i see it the most, being a hobi stan

yoongi is very calm and thoughtful and kind and sometimes appears to be cold/having a bad attitude but its just because of the way he speaks, which is very bluntly. again hes a multi faceted real human and i do not know him personally but thats generally what hes like.

god the fandom. treats him SO BAD. so horribly. he's shorter than hoseok. he's shorter than hoseok and people will exaggerate that literal 1 inch height difference so bad and people will turn his whole personality into shy and blushy and In Love With Hoseok, so in love with hoseok that ‘he gets sad’ when hoseok doesn’t kiss him/hug him/or whatever and IT BLEEDS INTO REAL LIFE.

ANY time hoseok or yoongi do ANYTHING together at ALL, people will ALWAYS push the narrative that hoseok, being the mean sadist he is, is 'hurting' yoongi for not returning his undying love or whatever. hoseok did a vlive where he made bracelets for all the members and he considered putting a cat charm on yoongi's but ultimately decided not to because he was having difficulty and oh my GOD sope stans twisted it into 'hoseok HATES yoongi, yoongi would have been so happy, he would have worn that all the time, hoseok isnt affectionate he hates being close with other people after all :(' which is LITERALLY not true because hoseok gives all his homies good night kisses but okay! whatever fits your narrative!

PEOPLE ACTUALLY HATE HOSEOK BECAUSE OF THIS. BECAUSE OF A SHIP. BECAUSE OF THE MANUFACTURED NARRATIVE PUSHED ONTO HIM BY FETISHISTS SO HE COULD FIT INTO THEIR HETERONORMATIVE ‘TOP’ ROLE. not to be all wahh wahh hoseok is one of the least popular members BUT THIS IS LITERALLY A CONTRIBUTING FACTOR.

everyone """headcanons""" hoseok to be a top so they will make him a MEAN HYPERMASCULINE person. everyone """headcanons""" yoongi as a bottom so they will make him a SOFT UWU HYPERFEMININE person. shippers are literally pigeonholing the two of them into fujoshi-esque roles for jack-off material.

anyways this all boils down to: gay fetishists will do anything, ANYTHING, to twist characters or real life fucking people to fit their heteronormative view of top and bottom. top=mean and masculine, bottom=soft and feminine. hoseok is a real life human being. yoongi is a real life human being. they both have real life human personalities, and yet shippers twist their personalities into the opposite to fit their narrative, to the point where nonshippers will genuinely view the two of them as something theyre not.

you have tons of armys that theorize that hoseok's happiness is just a mask he puts on to hide a cruel nature. on twitter. on youtube. in fanart and fanfiction. you have tons of armys that truly believe that, despite literally all the evidence, believe he hates being cute, he hates being happy, he hates the members, and hes secretly a dom daddy fuckboy who wants to bend yoongi over a table. hes a real life human being and fetishists doing their fetish thing has real life consequences.

the same is true for bottom!hoseok stans: they overexaggerate his more cutesy personality traits and he does have a 'feminine' figure i.e. he has a rly small waist but they will overexaggerate that as well and give him huge hips and its disgusting but dom!hoseok is far more frequent with far more devastating consequences so i used that as an example but they’re both bad.

people who """"headcanon"""" [like actually headcanon/firmly believe and not just joking or lighthearted] that members are gay will force these types of roles onto the members. if someone genuinely believes that like, yoongi is gay/bi/whatever, and then try to force this subby soft uwu persona onto him, they have no respect for gay people. they dont. gay people are simply objects for their fantasies. their view of gay people is so one-dimensional and so driven by fetishists’ ideas that its actually disheartening.

and god bitches will deadass be homophobic yet still ship real ass human idols. not just for bts specifically but all boygroup fandoms. sometimes when you search up an idol's name, [idol] gay will be trending--whether it be because of people saying "im gay for him" or whatever, and a LOT of cishet people will try 'clearing' the searches because being gay is bad or something. people normally ‘clear’ the searches if something like [idol fat] or [idol ugly] are trending, which im telling you so you know the context that people only clear the searches when bad things are happening.

[never forget that time 'jungkook gay' was trending and bitches were like "lets clear the searches!" but their pinned tweet said some shit like "sub jungkook x dom jimin coffee shop smut au thread 🌈". bitches also be like i cant be homophobic i ship taekook]

and hoseok and yoongi arent the only ones affected ! we could get into why namjoon and jin (another popular ship) are often assigned 'dad' and 'mom' respectively, or the fact that gay fetishists not only twist members' personalities to fit their ship narrative, but will also force tropes onto them i.e. taehyung/jungkook shippers who will literally demonize jimin and call him a slut or say that he's trying to 'get in the way of' of taekook or 'steal' taehyung/jungkook but thats a whole DIFFERENT rant baby! racism/asian fetishism is also definitely a present factor in all of this but this focus was primarily on gay fetishism and heteronormativity.

oh my god i could also get into the severe transphobia/trans fetishism in this fandom too but this post is already long enough as it is

tl dr: gay fetishists will fetishize real life people and it has actual real life effects and we should ban straight women from shipping mlm

#nobody is going to read this but i just needed to let it out man #fucking hate bts stans #fucking hate kpoppies #fuck u if ur not mlm like actually

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vanityloves · 3 years

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oak and stars for slick! :0

ah yes... this was sent last year...apologies for the last reply...happy 2021 mfs ♡ and thank you sm for the ask!

Word count: 1.6k i guess wtf.

cw: idk? homestuck ajsjdj. kinda mushy towards the end but dw im Me ♡ there's a joke somewhere in here

oak - who’s the more emotional one? how do you balance each other out in this aspect?

Defining 'emotional' is a bit difficult since it's often seen as 'whos the crybaby' but techinally, both parties are emotionally driven. The sole factor is one usually works solo (when working with a group, usually takes a supporting role) and takes things personally. The other can put those feelings aside and work with a group even if they're holding a personal grudge against them.

I'd have to say Ivory is more emotional in the sense of "who cried over (insert characters) death". But of course I'm going to elaborate.

I've always had issues placing Ivory in one 'category' and describe them as "a bit all over the place". At first, they're very jumpy and put off by Slick's demeanor (fairly so). They aren't rude or cold though, rather they're defensive and almost always on guard when around others. Despite this, they're quick to come to someone's aid to act as a protector, since they easily sympathize with others that show fear, sadness or hurt, even if it's an act. (Rightfully) Protraying themselves as naive. They've always been the type to comfort and protect - having a very 'motherly' presence (Ivory is a whole ass mother so I don't blame them)

Ivory is known to display sporadic bursts of emotions that range from enthusiasm and joy or angst and rage before returning to their calmed state in minutes. They're an odd case of slow to anger but quick to put out. The Knight finds the entire thing tiring but don't try to stop said outburts. Things that upset them before, suddenly changes with the seasons.

The type to appear cool, calm and collected and tries incredibly hard to maintain that when faced w/ dangerous situations. Inside though, they're probably ready to cry and once the ordeal is over, they probably do just that.

Ivory tries their best to think logically before jumping into any situation but find that things like 'promises' and plans hold them captive. They're easily swayed when things like this are brought up bc credibility and trust are incredibly important to them. Unfortunately, they're the type to beat themselves up over loses like that, even if it was for the greater good/nothing else could be done. They run off of the more positive emotions like hopefulness and joy (the 'happy feeling' after helping others). This isn't to say they're not petty or bitter, its very much the opposite - its too emotionally taxing to focus on themselves though.

♤

I think Slick is emotional in the sense of he'll experience certain things and if it's something he's not used to, his first reaction is to respond with anger or aggression. He has a pretty bad temper and described to have a nasty attitude and very black and white with his thoughts and decision making. He's the embodiment of 'I won't hesitate, bitch.', if he says something, he will follow through. He's the type to keep promises and wants the upheld on both ends, if the other party does not follow through, he's not the type to feel hurt, rather resorting to anger and cutting off ties - physically and emotionally, he's never been attached.

The man is a mobster so he's used to seeing blood and gore. He's definitely hardened over the years of that rough and tumble lifestyle, so it really isn't personal for him. He's never had it easy and doesn't rely on others (besides the crew) but he's willing to work with others if push comes to shove.

He's not very emotional in the crying and sniffling way. He keeps to himself most of the time and doesn't feel the need to help or seek out others. However, that's countered when he finds himself helping others that are defenseless but become enraged that someone would pick on someone that was 'obviously weaker'. He has a definite soft spot for the gentle, kinder things he runs across but I wouldn't say he gets super emotional about it. Slick runs off of negative emotions such as anger, pettiness, (such as Ivory does with guilt).

♤

They balance each other out with their different outlook/approach on each situation. Some things need to be done immediately and spontaneously, just as some things need to be done with patience or methodically. This isn't to call Slick a dumbass or whatever - the man works best without overthinking the situation and making calls on the spot. Ivory has their fair share of improvised plans but tend to work better with a loose plan (even if it's "don't die"). Their anxiety and lack of confidence ultimately puts them at greater risk.

One thing that's great ab Slick is, he's very sure about himself, his actions, and his feelings so it's reassuring for Ivory. Ivory lends Slick a lot of patience, understanding, but with a firm hand. They don't expect him to take their advice all the time but they expect him to hear them out. There are plenty of close calls that stress Ivory out to no end but on the flipside, Slick doesn't expect Ivory to be so rash and promptly follows them when they do rush into things - he's protective by nature and there's a bit of a curiosity involved.

♤

Overall, their relationship tends to tilt towards the negative aspects of being emotionally driven - pettiness, guilt, spite, etc. But they reassure/calm the other when things get more serious. Slick is incredibly protective and will put himself in danger for them. It's not a matter of not trusting Ivory, rather, it is a sign of loyalty and commitment hebhas towards them.

Ivory is confident in Slick and knows he can fair well on his own or with a team - they still worry but they often rely on hope and luck that things will eventually work in their favor (that's not to say they won't work for their future/goals).

♤

stars - what kind of a date would your f/o take you on?

Ivory was never one for big, flashy dates even in their previous relationships (much to their dismay, they went on many). Dressing up every so often is fun but loses its novelty if it's constant. Slick doesn't seem too flashy either, preferring to lay low and enjoy the time he has alone - sure he broods but he's having his noir film moment. He doesn't mind spending money, he's got plenty to spare which he usually uses on booze and cigarettes anyways. There's no harm in spoiling Ivory on occasion and probably enjoys taking them someplace nice. He hates dressing up in stuffy, 3 piece suits and avoids them at all costs, but if Ivory's dressed to the nines, he's not gonna be shown up.

I've said it as a joke but truthfully, the couple could start off at a 5 star and end up at the diner down the street. Sharing fries all done up in heels and makeup, cufflinks and polished shoes.

That being said, they're both more casual! The duo is more than content driving around the city listening to the radio and enjoying the others company, regardless of the silence.*** Truthfully, dinner and a nice drive or walk around the city is ideal. Ivory's more of a window shopping type and enjoys peeking into windows to watch people bustle around. Slick tends to walk a few steps behind to keep them in view, admire from afar type. He's not a very chatty individual and tends to rely on looks and physical touch when talking to Ivory. He's got a permanent scowl on his face but he's truly content when he's with them.

♤

Slick enjoys his privacy but he's not against going out for drinks and enjoying a nice performance here and there. But if it's shit, he won't be sticking around (if he goes alone), with Ivory he can distract himself and leads them somewhere quiet and he snidely comments on the performances while Ivory tries to find the good and bad in it.

Since that's more of a hit or miss type of date, he tends to do things that are sure to be more relaxing. He's a hotblooded guy, while Ivory's more mellow so he figures getting them riled up isn't something that's 'fun' for them; makes him settle his ass down before he breaks a hip He'll pop in a few of his cherished noir films and let them get as close as they like - he's not as picky ab touch when they're alone.

If not that, he has Ivory randomly choose a record to play and sits back with them. If he was generous and feeling sweet, he'll help them to their feet and hold them near and sway together. He's an awkward romantic but a romantic nonetheless, so he's willing to push through it for the sake of having them against him and teasing them if they look a bit flushed (but reading the atmosphere).

***Extra thing:

Slick really said 'I know a place' and drives out of the city that scares shit out of Ivory- purely because this is unknown territory. Of course they trust him but their nerves often get the best of them as they sit up, a bit stiffly as they look at the scenery passing by.

Very smooth conversation:

"this is where I get rid of 'things'"

"really?"

"yeah"

"oh...at least the view is nice. guess that's why you drove this far."

*met w/ silence*

What 'things', you may ask? Take a wild guess! Maybe it's emotional baggage, sometimes is Physical Baggage!

#self ship #self insert #homestuck #spades slick #slow down why we going so fast!!!#s: knives and ivory #my headcanons #my writing #why must i keep talking jfc #been sitting in my docs for weeks. finally finished them today. bye.#ask reply #anon #n e ways.#♡♡♡ slick ♡♡♡#but also slick....🔫😔

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booksbookandmorebooks · 5 years

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Homecoming - The Cinematography.

Hello my lovelies I’m back with my first post of the new year! i thought id start it off with something a little different. When looking at how much I upload and how sporadic my posts seem to be lately I started thinking about what else I do with my time (besides reading) and well, honestly my only other hobby is that I tend to binge watch a lot of shows. In the past month I have binged watched Alias Grace, The OA and shamefully quite a few more including the show I’m here to talk about today, homecoming. So, I thought why not incorporate my passion into my blog. So, from here on out this blog will not only be dedicated to books that I love it will also include my reviews on the recent shows I have been watching. I really hope you enjoy this little change up and enjoy my reviews.

So without further ado let’s get started!

This show is about a young woman known as Heidi (Julia Roberts) who we initially see harassed by a department of defence official. Who is extremely interested in the time she spent employed and head of the project formerly known as home coming. A facility described and branded as a a type of institute focused on helping former soldiers transition back to civilian life after their service and help them adjust. While jumping between the present day and a series of flashbacks we see our characters realise that not only have they been lying to the people around them they have also been lying to themselves and now is the time to face up to the truth and the repercussions of some very questionable choices.

Stats:

Title: Homecoming

Genre: Psychological thriller / Drama

Release date: 02.11.2018

No. of episodes / seasons: 1 Season – 10 Episodes

Episode duration: 25-30 minutes.

Main cast: Julia Roberts, Bobby Cannavale, Stephan James.

Rotten tomatoes rating: 98%

So to start off with this show is not exactly your normal stero-typical show. If anything, the first half of episode one I was unsure if this was something I would actually enjoy. It all seemed a little too out there but I pushed through and once I had finished episode one I was hooked. The main issue I can see people having with it would be the odd shots and the odd pacing. These are one of a few topics I will be discussing and analysing below. While these factors can be a little daunting and seem a little pretentious, when you really look at them, they become so interesting to watch unfold. You can really let your imagination run with this series, it feels more like an art form in some senses than just a show. Instead of it being a throw away show that is trying to appear edgy, it genuinely provides the audience with this feeling of uneasy and eeriness throughout. This series not only stuck with me for the storyline and the shocking twists but also because of the intensity of emotions you feel when watching. When talking about this with a friend I realised that this show is more addictive due to the anticipation of what experimental shot or method we would experience next, more than overall enjoyment of the show.

In this post I will mainly be talking about the methods ,themes and the many approaches the director and producers have used to create this show and how they in turn, translated to me personally.

One of the most common shots we see for the first half of the show are these downward angle shots, now im not massively into my media studies so there are most probably a fast amount of terminologies I am missing but bare with me. These shots tend to make you feel like you are watching an animal in a maze. You get to see the characters from a bird’s eye view and watch them wind their way around their surroundings. When watching this I couldn’t help but feel the characters, any characters involved in this method were puppets being watching and manipulated, Even the bigger characters who we initially believe to have power and control are being used. Almost like animals in a testing lab. This is confirmed for me when in the episode the camera pans out to reveal the design of the building our series mainly takes place in. It is a big building with huge celling to floor walls of glass. Almost like an observatory, furthering my theory of observation through testing, a theme we know towards the end of the series is very important to the story development.

Another very important feature in this series is the change in aspect ratio and how its used to differentiate the two time periods that the show is set in. (past and present) the use of this method while a little jarring at first (it had me checking the tv and the app when I watched it) is so clever because when jumping between two different time periods it is so easy to confuse the audience and risk the chance of the storylines becoming messy and convoluted but with this it was almost impossible not to follow. We see the present depicted with two black sections of either side of the screen and the past in full screen view. Now as I mentioned, this method while clever isn’t something that you would necessarily deem as clever. You may see it like I did at first, something there that has no real meaning, it is just to further the weird feeling this show creates, that is until episode eight. Contained in one scene that I won’t spoil for you; a particular character has a huge revelation and the director not only shows the severity and shocking nature of this through the use of facial expressions and music but the aspect ratio we have been used to seeing in the present is used to demonstrate the character being bought into the light. We see that in her moment the camera shot widens and the present is left in full screen mode. To symbolise that her character is no longer in the dark and she can finally see the bigger picture. Something that when it happened I had to take a minute to appreciate it. It blew my mind that how such a simple change can really impact the feeling that you have when watching a show like this.

While on the subject of time differences I want to also mention a more common method but one that proved just as effective. In the shots of the past the colours are all desaturated and have this sad melancholy feel to them which really do help show the vast dullness of our main characters present life. Especially when compared to the flashbacks. The bright lights, the white walls and open nature of the building our main character is working in, the fake over the top smiles everyone sports, the over helpfulness of Heidi when compared to the reclusive and reluctant (almost isolated) whisper of a person we now see. Simple yet, very very effective.

Now as I mentioned, after to talking to some friends that have watched this show the biggest problem most people seemed to share was the pacing. I often heard it referred to as an issue and while I can understand it from their point of view I have to very strongly disagree. This was not an issue for me, this show was not meant to be rushed. It was supposed to burn slowly and gradually to help you grow as a viewer alongside the characters. If this show was rushed the audience would most definitely feel robbed. A piece of art like this is not something to be watched flippantly in one sitting and be disregarded upon a pile of throw away trash tv. This is really something.

I feel the shows pacing is intentionally slow because it mirrors the story and the story telling method. The relationships are gradually built through therapy sessions, a method of help that is used to slowly help the victim. All those subtle sighs, glances and twitches that help define a character are lost if not handled with care and time. You’re not only watching these people, you’re growing with them. It’s a way to engage the audience without them knowing it. Hooking and drawing you in. it captivates you and on reflection once I finished this show, I was fascinated by how it managed to do such an amazing job at that.

Not only that, but at this pace you are provided with enough time to form your own opinions and feelings towards these people, their choices and their pasts, instead of being provided with a set narrative. This way your feelings are not dictated to you, you’re not presented with the black and white ideal of good and bad, in fact this show often tends to blur those lines. Making peoples seemingly bad decisions almost justifiable. We are provided with on numerous occasions scenarios that show not only the redeeming qualities of a person but their flaws and we are able to form our own views on them in our own time. Something that wouldn’t be possible without a slow burner.

I really could continue analysing this show because there are just so many amazing factors. From music to the close-up face shots or the intensity of the volume that changes so frequently but I will stop, I have to at some point. All my friends are bored of me talking this show up, so I suggest you go and watch it yourself. You can only learn so much from a review after all. But if you are looking for something that will leave you speechless and stay with you for weeks after, I can’t recommend this highly enough, if that’s not enough the amazing talent of Julia Roberts should at least tempt you a little. I really hope you enjoy the show and can start looking for your own explanations and feelings towards this alien methodology! Until next time have a great week!

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heartofaquamarine · 6 years

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Jargon and Language: Primer, Climate Science, Instant Messaging and Romance.

I was watching an old episode of @actuallykylekallgren‘s review show Brows Held High, specifically the episode on the 2004 sci-fi film Primer. While I enjoyed the episode, towards the end I ran into a bit of a problem, particularly with how Kyle describes the use of technical jargon in the film. (And don’t worry, I’ve chatted with Kyle about this on twitter. This isn’t a call out...well, it sort of is, but he knows it’s coming and is okay with admitting his earlier stuff has flaws? So anyway.) Primer is an odd little movie about the creation of a time machine and time travel. One of the notable things about it is that the creator, Shane Carruth, deliberately copied the way that scientists and engineers use shorthand terms and a very specific kind of working slang, and recreated that in the scenes depicting the scientists building the time machine. There is no exposition for the sake of the audience, no companion for the Doctor to turn to and say “Wibbly wobbly timey wimey”...actually, that’s unfair. That takes it in a completely different direction; on a spectrum with technical terminology on one end, technobabble in the middle, “WWTW” is way over on the other side labelled “It’s not actually important, don’t worry about it”.

In the BHH episode, Kyle calls this a badly told story, comparing it directly to Carl Sagan and other popular science personalities like Bill Nye. The problem, the episode indicates, is that the film should have been used as an opportunity to explain the physics of time travel; using science fiction as science fact.

I kind of have two issues with this Actually, I have three issues but one is more tangential, so let’s start with the first two. Firstly, to be honest Primer is a far better depiction of the daily lives of scientific research than almost any other film. We don’t spell out every single concept each time we talk about them; we define it once and generally assume that when talking to people in our field. This is reflected in the sets and designs of the time machine itself; the film is shot in very ordinary surroundings, mainly industrial parks, while the machine itself is a simple grey box and...yeah. Lots of scientific work takes place in areas like that and using equipment like that. I recognised a lot of the hallways in Primer not because I’ve been to those specific places, but because I’ve seen so many places like that where scientific research is carried out. If I wanted to I could probably construct an argument for how this is good for the story Primer is trying to be, the scifi realism it aims for, but that’s not really the point of this essay. The second point is pretty simple. This is not actually jargon. It is not a description of the physics of time travel, because as far as I am aware, no one has built a time machine. Time travel, as portrayed in this movie and films like Back to The Future, scientifically is not just not a theory, it hasn’t even clawed it’s way up to being a hypothesis; it is at best speculation about the nature of something that we can’t even say exists (there have been experiments that appear to break causality on the quantum level, but they keep ending up coming out as having only appeared to break causality. At least as far as I know, it’s been a while since I moved from physics to climate science). The third issue I mentioned is more of an oddity of the episode in the context of the rest of Brows Held High. BHH is a show primarily about movies, and as such it spends a lot of its time looking at cinematic concepts and terminology. I mean heck, the phrase “cinematic language” pops up a lot. While Kyle usually explains these terms, it feels weird to have him complaining about a movie using specialised language, in a show dedicated to exploring particular concepts using specialised language. More specifically, he often examines movies using cinematic language in ways I, an audience member outside the field of film theory, would not understand; references to particular films, techniques I don’t notice till someone points them out to me, ect. What I’m saying is Kyle both uses jargon on his show, and does not call out the use of jargon in other films, because he is used to using those terms. For him, it is not jargon. It is language. And this is what I want to look at. Jargon is usually considered to be specific technical terms that only people in a particular field understand. I kind of think this is a useful construct, but I want to widen the definition to look at other kinds of language and other situations that we might call jargon. Let’s start with some classic jargon.

An isopycnic-coordinate oceanic circulation model formulated with the aim of simulating thermodynamically and mechanically driven flow in realistic basins is presented. Special emphasis is placed on the handling of diabatic surface processes and on thermocline ventilation. The model performance is illustrated by a 30-year spinup run with coarse horizontal resolution (2° mesh) in a domain with North Atlantic topography extending from 10° to 60°N latitude.

This is not something I just wrote myself. It is from the abstract of a scientific paper I have open in another tab. To me, that’s a perfectly understandable paragraph. I don’t have to look anything up (well, okay, I did have to check isopycnic but to be fair there’s a lot of iso’s in climate science) to understand it. To other people, that is a wall of jargon (to be honest I’d be curious as to what non-scientists think it means. It’s surprisingly simple. If people want I can explain it but for now it is left as an exercise for the reader).

I think we can all recognise that as jargon. Everyone okay with defining that as jargon? Okay, good! Now that we have an example of jargon, let’s quickly give a definition of jargon. Jargon, as we are using it here, is a form of specific language used between an in-group that is not understandable by members of an out-group. That’s the most general definition, but usually the in-group is very particular, and usually professional in nature.

What you might not have noticed is that above, in the paragraph where I talk about how Primer can’t describe the theory of time travel because that’s not there in a coherent enough form to be described, is that I was using the words “theory” and “hypothesis” in their technical form. In casual speech, a theory and a hypothesis are basically the same thing. in scientific terminology however, there’s a clear difference. A hypothesis is a prediction of what we expect to observe, and notably even here in this definition I am using jargon because I have left out the word “falsifiable” from in front of the word “hypothesis”. A hypothesis is a prediction with a clear way of shown to be wrong. A theory is a hypothesis that has succeeded in not being falsified enough that we take it as essentially correct (empirical science has no method of absolute proof. At least not philosophically).

So, question. You likely got what I meant up there, even if you don’t know the technical definitions of those words in the way I was using them. But these are technical terms being used in comparison to each other in a short hand. So...could we say that’s jargon?

What is the exact line between language, and jargon? What happens when you have a technical definition that is close enough to how you might construct the same sentence in a casual sense that it can still be understood?

(On a side note, originally I was going to use the terms theory and law here, since colloquially, a law is treated as more important than a theory, but in scientific terms they have different meanings. A law is a generalised statement of observations. A theory provides an explanation for why this occurs. The law of evolution might be “the distribution of alleles in a population varies over time”, while the theory of evolution provides an explanation for why these alleles change and what factors control the change in the distribution...but I couldn’t work a law into the bit above so I went for hypothesis and theory, which have the same meaning in casual language but different specific meanings. Anyways...)

Let’s broaden the discussion a bit more, and bring in a different form of language.

I have a lot of problems understanding body language. I can read facial expressions a bit better, but trying look at body language is like trying to decipher a cryptogram for me. This actually caused quite a lot of trouble for me as a teenager, as I kept misreading people’s body language, particularly my mum’s who has a very idiosyncratic body language. I can now generally read my immediate family, but I’ve known them for over twenty years, and that’s a lot of time to build an individual vocabulary of someone’s quirks, particularly when you live with them. I can’t generalise this knowledge, I can’t read most people’s body language.

This has resulted in me actually finding it far easier to read intention and mood in text than in person. I don’t have the conflicting signals I’m misreading from their body language, just their words, the bit I get, and people’s writing style in causal IM style conversations often changes depending on mood. I might need to see a couple of examples of someone’s texting, but I can generally read someone’s mood pretty accurately from text. It is rarely the words that change, but the grammar and punctuation they use around those words. Someone who usually uses capital letters drops to lower case; something’s wrong. Someone who is usually very loose uses full sentences and punctuation? This is something serious. And so on.

Neither of these forms of meaning are usually deliberate on the part of the person doing the communicating, but a.) they are a form of conveying information and b.) I can understand one, putting me in an in-group, and I cannot understand the other, putting me in an out-group by the definitions above. So then, my next question is can something be jargon, even if the language being used is not deliberate?

Here I run into a weird problem. Instinctively I’d say no, that jargon is a deliberate short hand within groups, and that there’s a difference between not understanding the jargon in a particular field and say, not understand French. There’s a line there, and it might be fuzzy, but if we expand jargon too widely we end up with something useless, or at least indistinguishable from the concept of language in general. But, at the same time...I find it fairly easy to slip this into the definition of jargon. It’s a specific meaning added to the sentence. The fact that it is done with how the sentence is communicated, and not the sentence itself might mean that we put it outside the definition of jargon but should we? I mean English is notorious for requiring emphasis to create meaning (for example the sentence “I never said she stole it” has seven different meanings depending on which word you put the emphasis on), and this has a clear out group and in group; I have shown how I can construct an out group for one and an in group for the other by myself!

So then the next question might be to approach it the other way. Is it useful to class these as jargon, as opposed to simply different languages? I’d say yes, it is fairly useful; saying that body language to me is jargon is a good way to get across the difficulty I have in understanding body language. It’s a useful term, and it fits the definition so I’m actually going to have to say yes. Body language and IM punctuation can both be jargon, and like all jargon you can move from the out group to the in group, and vice versa if you don’t keep up with the evolution of the terminology.

You might say it’s weird that I’m spending this much time defining jargon and trying to work out it’s limits, but I have my reasons outside of sheer academic interest (or; how far can I stretch this mental tool). One is professional; I am interested in communicating science to the public, something that is particularly important for climate science for fairly obvious reasons, and thinking about how to carry out this communication, not just in terms of the vocabulary I am using but the grammar and indeed the punctuation I am using is important. Working out what people will call jargon is really useful there.

Secondly, calling something jargon I think has subtle implications on how it positions you in relation to the people around you. I am aromantic, and to be honest a lot of the way that people discuss romance is, to me, a clear example of jargon. A while back I asked people to define romance, and what made a romantic relationship different from other kinds, and they really struggled. The response I got a lot involved some variation on the phrase “It’s a feeling...you just know”.

The thing is, I’m aromantic. I don’t just know. That feeling being described is a shorthand for something I do not understand. That is jargon.

The thing is, things like body language and romance are expected to be understood in society. By classing them as jargon, a lack of this understanding I think is flipped; it isn’t that people who don’t understand common implications and social language are “abnormal”, but rather that it is a form of jargon they don’t understand. And from politics to science to art to, yes, film theory and describing building a fictional time machine, there is always jargon we don’t understand.

#long post #jargon #brows held high #primer #aromantic #aro #body language #the philosophy of science #instant messaging #climate science #this is a weird collection of tags #language #film theory #cinematic language

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yazmaeylemi · 5 years

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Run Your Own Organisation By Reselling Wholesale Baby Clothing On EBay

In order to chat concerning love and also still create a socially acceptable metropolitan identification, artists often tend to apply among the five successful love narrative kinds. Nobody recognizes circumstances like that, individuals cant handle it, so they 'll discuss it permanently. The female attempting to market me their newest phone set described a tv advert. She kept me speaking for around 10 minutes throughout which time she referred me to this particular TV advert a further 4 times, and also each time I assured her I had actually not seen it since I don't view television. Weaving can be selected up throughout the adverts as well as operated at for 5 or 10 minutes at once. New threads and also fashionable pattern layouts make knitting enjoyable as well as quickly, and also I can knit also if I am watching TELEVISION, albeit an uncommon occurence for me directly! With the net, even if you live in a neighborhood that is tiny, you aren't limited to your regional location, as well as can discover people not simply around the UK, however across the world too! After that decorate with baby images and such, after that take it to your local duplicate shop, like Kinkos, and also have them publish the web page on pastel tinted paper. Often weve discovered regional road fairs or windsurfing tournaments or a design train museum. Weve spoke about endometriosis, that which can be a cyst. So, you can have bleeding with a cyst but many of the moment those are rare scenarios. The endometriomas, if they continue, as well as theres continual blood loss in the abdomen and also the ovary that can trigger bonds. Any kind of hemorrhaging cyst can be an issue. A maternity with a corpus luteum, the second sort of practical cyst takes place to establish as the child is expanding. The majority of these, the larger blood products, the larger blood vessels on cysts are generally the corpus luteum cyst. The majority of ovary cysts in as well as of themselves are not going to be triggering a trouble. But, the important point below, is that cysts themselves, in as well as of themselves are not mosting likely to be a problem or harmful trouble. The nature of the celebration is possibly going to have a tendency towards the womanly side; if the coordinators of the party have an arrangement for this, after that welcoming guys would certainly be fine. Without a doubt, there are numerous men and also ladies that are making great loan using the net company path. In this tune, the poet uses the perceptual narrative to recognize that some guys "dont be comin right ", however that he has a different assumption of females than these other guys. Supposed to aid with the discomfort, intended to assist me preserve In this song, Master utilizes the different story to share his sight of what love should be. It is important for the clothes to be completely dry before they are done away with or worn by a kid, as well as hanging the garments on childrens clothing hangers will certainly help maintain their type. Nonetheless, aspartame was enabled on 1981 for completely dry items and 1983 for carbonated beverages.

free baby stuff expecting mother

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The major and also is that most, if not all of these complimentary products, are provided right to the mommy's house. And also, with that, lets solve down to the core. Do you have the software program you need to begin? At some time you are mosting likely to intend to move your child, so you will require to buy something. Unless you're preparing to hang on to them for your following infant, they're simply collecting dust. With a few straightforward skills, an useful collection of "things, " and just a little bit of planning as well as preparation, youll get on your method! There is a place for TELEVISION in our lives as well as it is after all the fastest means of absorbing information from all over the world. Taking courses abroad Below, the poet makes use of the spiritual story to define the moment, place as well as feelings that his love was founded on, talking of them as if they were somehow implied to happen. Probably she believed that was her location worldwide as well as no-one might fault her if she executed her responsibilities to miraculous of her ability. I when had a neighbour that informed the world as well as it's mom she thought cleanliness was next to Godliness and invested all day daily cleaning her home. It is thought that from this you really have the option to inspect out whatever prior to you also need to acquire something. Tight neck lines would trouble you as well as also the placement of buttons at odd placements would trigger you issues, so inspect these beforehand. At the same time the switches and also various other aspects in the layout should be very carefully stitched. But Betty had the cash money whenever I went to prison This tune even more highlights making use of contrasting stories to express love. This example further illustrates making use of initial language in conversational narratives. The poet feels it is unacceptable for anybody to "call you out your name ", or to put it simply, make use of disparaging language towards his love. A lot of the baby shower suggestions will function for any area, indoors or out. Do you want your baby to look cute or trendy with child clothes yet you don't have suggestions on where to seek them? Expense is a significant thing you would certainly intend to think about when acquiring baby clothing. It's easy, check out a baby garments shop. Apparel care plays a big role in your baby's safety. Therefore, it is always recommended that you keep the safety as well as comfort consider mind also when you are looking for celebration dresses for your little one. Even when you have actually purchased a lacy blouse for your tiny girl, if you finish up obtaining a size that happens to be slightly bigger than her actual dimension, she will be comfy in it. As well as, parents will certainly be likely to keep buying clothes to stay on par with the changes in the child's growth - dimension, weight, size, as well as shape. For this reason, acquiring garments that are somewhat larger than the genuine dimension of your infants body gifts will be good as it makes certain optimal convenience for the kid.

Nevertheless, these immunization procedures will only make their systems solid but it does not offer a guarantee that microorganisms can not permeate their method. So why did she behave this way? The very same point can be real with, certainly with tube maternities, thats why those 2 can be confused. Yes it is real that baby clothes do not last long with children growing as rapid as they do, yet caring for an infants clothes is still equally as, otherwise even more, vital. Hip-Hop, you the love of my life as well as that holds true This passage is unique since it makes use of both the metaphoric and contrasting narrative methods. The discussion of Hip-Hop love narratives is a really uphill struggle. Which leads us to the most popular metaphoric Hip-Hop love story of our time. Children will certainly like this recipe. Thick as well as fluffy clothing will keep the baby cozy from head to toe. Below is a list of popular things that has actually been investigated with several of the largest on the internet stores of infant items. Here are a few of the basic points you'll intend to have. Do you want to offer a present to a new mom without spending a great deal of money? They use it when washing to remove odors, soften the fabrics, and offer your infant as well as kid clothes a fresh and extra natural fragrance. When you are considering your youngsters comfort, its not only regarding the style of the apparel youre acquiring it will certainly also refer just how the thing rests on your infants body. Think about just how much you have into the thing. The next time you are re-assembling your package, make certain to include that thing. I would certainly instead spend time with my household as well as pals, chatting on the phone, choosing lengthy walks or dancing the evening away. With all that having been said, Ive discovered a new food that I understand I'm going to love. Soon you'll discover that having just a couple of wonderful outfits ends up being impractical. I had a great cost-free website a couple of years ago I saw every day. Use your Road Experience logbook to videotape everyones remarks regarding the day. This will offer no good as buying baby items indiscriminately will not just be waste of loan however also wild-goose chase and also energy which you can place for some constructive usage. If passing by automobile you need to constantly make use of a cars and truck seat and also comply with the maker's directions for fitting. If your trip limit is no more than a one-hour vehicle trip one way, after that search for places of rate of interest within about 40 miles of home. Which is not an issue because much like kidneys, much like testis, females with one ovary can have just as lots of babies as a female with two ovaries as well as 2 tubes. Obviously it is a 2x matrix, meaning those initial 2 people you obtained to sign up with get on your very first level. You must constantly have two sets at night time, since you never know when a child is going to spew up or have a baby diaper leakage that can need a full garment adjustment.

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buddie4life123 · 5 years

Text

Run Your Own Organisation By Re-selling Wholesale Infant Clothes On EBay

In order to discuss love and still construct a socially acceptable urban identity, musicians have a tendency to implement among the 5 effective love narrative forms. Nobody recognizes scenarios like that, people cant manage it, so they 'll discuss it permanently. The lady trying to offer me their most recent phone set referred to a tv advert. She maintained me speaking for roughly 10 mins throughout which time she referred me to this specific TV advert an additional 4 times, and each time I guaranteed her I had actually not seen it because I do not see tv. Knitting can be grabbed during the adverts and functioned at for 5 or 10 minutes at a time. New threads and fashionable pattern styles make weaving fun and also quickly, and also I can knit also if I am enjoying TV, albeit a rare occurence for me directly! With the web, also if you reside in a neighborhood that is small, you aren't restricted to your local location, as well as can find people not just around the UK, yet across the world too! Then decorate with child photos and also such, then take it to your neighborhood duplicate shop, like Kinkos, as well as have them publish the web page on pastel tinted paper. Sometimes weve occurred upon neighborhood road fairs or windsurfing events or a design train museum. Weve spoke about endometriosis, that which can be a cyst. So, you can have bleeding with a cyst but a lot of the moment those are rare circumstances. The endometriomas, if they linger, and theres continuous bleeding in the abdominal area and also the ovary that can cause attachments. Any kind of bleeding cyst can be an issue. A pregnancy with a corpus luteum, the 2nd sort of functional cyst takes place to create as the baby is growing. Most of these, the bigger blood products, the larger blood vessels on cysts are typically the corpus luteum cyst. A lot of ovary cysts in as well as of themselves are not mosting likely to be creating an issue. However, the essential thing here, is that cysts themselves, in and also of themselves are not mosting likely to be an issue or life threatening issue. The nature of the event is probably mosting likely to tend towards the feminine side; if the organizers of the event have a stipulation for this, then welcoming guys would certainly be fine. Without a doubt, there are numerous males and females who are making great cash using the internet business path. In this track, the poet utilizes the affective narrative to recognize that some men "dont be comin right ", but that he has a different understanding of females than these various other males. Meant to aid with the discomfort, intended to aid me maintain In this tune, Master utilizes the contrasting narrative to share his sight of what love ought to be. It is necessary for the garments to be completely dry prior to they are done away with or put on by a child, and also hanging the clothes on kids garments wall mounts will certainly aid maintain their kind. Nonetheless, aspartame was allowed on 1981 for completely dry products as well as 1983 for carbonated beverages.

free baby stuff expecting mother

Individuals made use of to trade products and services for other products as well as solutions prior to cash was developed, and some individuals still trade today to stay clear of using money (mainly for tax obligation factors I am told). A few other fantastic solutions are a baby diaper solution for fabric diapering mommies, or even a diaper distribution service for disposables, and also spend for the very first two weeks or a month well worth of diapering products. Also the shades utilized in the textile must be organic as well as safe. You may be at first brought in by all the eye appealing shades and also the fanciness of the clothing, however if your child is not going to like it, it is going to spoil. Jammies and also bodysuits for little baby women come in all various colors and designs, and also are produced all sorts of weather. A couple of pieces would certainly do - a set of babies suits, a set of tee shirts, a set of pyjamas. At the same time, you can put a Tee shirts over their pajamas. They will certainly guard as well as insure any loan you place right into a cost savings account and also pay you perhaps 3% annual rate of interest on your deposit. They know that if you're pleased with your sample, even more than most likely you be ended up being a regular client as well as invest cash with them. There are truly a great deal of freebies offered; you simply require to understand exactly how to browse for them. Or search by chemical active ingredients (see listing below for some instances) as well as uncover what brand names contain it. Next, you will come to your search result page; this is a listing of all items that meet your search criteria. Let us take a peek right into what makes these standards a should for those moms and dads shopping for baby clothes. Additionally, allow your first few road journeys show you what you require to have along. There are countless very first time mommies out there that have a great deal of information to share with you as well as they do not desire you to be without the information. They wish to have gowns with breathable fabric and very easy on the body. Is this what we have pertained to, - everyone in our region watches the exact same adverts, the same programs, the very same information tales every solitary day or evening? Note: After trying solitary foods, great combinations are potatoes and carrots or carrots and peas. As well as not only will I assess it for him, Sickness make it seem like the Elvis of foods, because Im already quite certain that Ill enjoy a hamdog. He additionally describes his love rate of interest as "this Ethiopian queen from Philly ", using the imperial characterization so usual in spiritual love narratives. If you're truly strapped for cash money, then you can possibly use utilizing your bed as a transforming table, yet if you can, this is something I extremely advise. Its much better to feed baby initial point in the morning, after that permit some play or rest time in between prior to giving baby a bath. At a "Pamper Celebration," a concept significantly prominent for mommies that already have a number of youngsters and also as a result the majority of the things they really require, they might take residence medical spa devices such as a loofah or bubble bathroom. A wonderful bath-themed gift basket would include some hypo-allergenic bathroom items, like child bathrooms, talc, towels, and also bath playthings.

The significant and also is that a lot of, otherwise all of these totally free products, are delivered right to the mommy's home. And also, keeping that, lets get right down to the core. Do you have the software application you need to begin? Eventually you are going to want to deliver your baby, so you will certainly need to get something. Unless you're intending to hold on to them for your next infant, they're just collecting dirt. With a few easy skills, a convenient collection of "things, " and simply a bit of preparation as well as prep work, youll be on your means! There is a location for TELEVISION in our lives and it seeks all the fastest method of absorbing information from all over the world. Taking classes abroad Here, the poet makes use of the spiritual narrative to define the time, location and also emotions that his love was established on, talking of them as if they were somehow meant to occur. Possibly she believed that was her area worldwide and also no-one might fault her if she did her obligations to miraculous of her capacity. I when had a neighbor that notified the globe and it's mom she thought sanitation was beside Godliness as well as spent throughout the day everyday cleansing her home. It is thought that from this you really have the option to look into every little thing prior to you also need to buy something. Tight neck lines would certainly problem you as well as even the placement of switches at odd positions would trigger you issues, so check these ahead of time. At the very same time the buttons and other aspects in the style should be meticulously sewn. Yet Betty had the money whenever I went to prison This song better shows the usage of contrasting narratives to reveal love. This example better highlights using introductory language in conversational narratives. The poet feels it is inappropriate for any individual to "call you out your name ", or in other words, use derogatory language toward his love. A lot of the baby shower suggestions will help any type of area, inside your home or out. Do you want your infant to look cute or cool with child clothing yet you do not have suggestions on where to seek them? Expense is a significant thing you would certainly intend to think about when acquiring child clothing. It's simple, consider a child clothing shop. Clothing care plays a large function in your infant's security. Therefore, it is constantly suggested that you keep the safety and security and also convenience consider mind even when you are buying occasion dresses for your child. Even when you have acquired a lacy blouse for your little girl, if you finish up obtaining a dimension that takes place to be slightly larger than her real size, she will certainly be comfy in it. And also, parents will certainly be likely to maintain getting clothes to keep up with the alterations in the infant's growth - size, weight, size, as well as form. Thus, getting clothing that are rather larger than the real size of your infants body presents will certainly be excellent as it makes certain optimal comfort for the kid.

Nevertheless, these immunization procedures will just make their systems solid yet it doesn't give an assurance that bacteria can not permeate their way in. So why did she behave by doing this? The exact same point can be true with, definitely with tube maternities, thats why those 2 can be perplexed. Yes it holds true that baby clothing do not last lengthy with youngsters expanding as rapid as they do, yet caring for an infants garments is still simply as, otherwise even more, crucial. Hip-Hop, you the love of my life which holds true This flow is one-of-a-kind because it uses both the metaphoric as well as contrasting narrative techniques. The presentation of Hip-Hop love stories is an extremely uphill struggle. Which leads us to the most popular metaphoric Hip-Hop love story of our time. Children will enjoy this dish. Thick and cosy outfits will certainly keep the infant warm from head to toe. Below is a list of preferred products that has been researched with a few of the largest on the internet stores of baby products. Below are several of the standard points you'll intend to have. Do you wish to provide a present to a new mother without spending a lot of money? They utilize it when cleaning to eliminate smells, soften the textiles, and provide your infant and also kid apparel a fresh and also more natural fragrance. When you are thinking about your childs comfort, its not only concerning the style of the clothes youre purchasing it will also refer how the item remains on your children body. Consider just how much you have right into the thing. The following time you are re-assembling your package, make certain to add that product. I would certainly rather hang around with my friends and family, chatting on the phone, going with lengthy walks or dancing the evening away. With all that having actually been said, Ive discovered a new food that I know I'm going to enjoy. Soon you'll discover that having just a few wonderful attire comes to be unwise. I had an excellent totally free website a few years ago I saw each day. Use your Road Journey logbook to tape-record everybodies comments concerning the day. This will certainly serve no good as buying child items indiscriminately will not simply be waste of loan yet likewise wild-goose chase as well as energy which you can place for some constructive usage. If travelling by auto you must constantly utilize a child seat and also adhere to the supplier's directions for suitable. If your journey limit is no even more than a one-hour auto trip one means, after that seek places of rate of interest within about 40 miles of house. Which is not a trouble due to the fact that just like kidneys, just like testis, females with one ovary can have equally as several infants as a female with 2 ovaries and 2 tubes. Apparently it is a 2x matrix, meaning those initial two people you reached join are on your first degree. You ought to always have two sets at night time, due to the fact that you never ever understand when a child is mosting likely to spew up or have a baby diaper leak that can call for a complete garment adjustment.

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#free #baby #stuff

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shekillsher · 5 years

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Run Your Own Organisation By Marketing Wholesale Baby Clothing On EBay

In order to speak about love and also still build a socially acceptable metropolitan identity, artists tend to apply one of the 5 successful love narrative forms. Nobody understands circumstances like that, people cant offer with it, so they 'll discuss it forever. The female trying to market me their most recent phone set described a tv advert. She kept me speaking for about 10 mins during which time she referred me to this certain TV advert a more 4 times, and each time I assured her I had actually not seen it because I don't enjoy tv. Weaving can be chosen up throughout the adverts and also functioned at for 5 or 10 mins at a time. New threads as well as elegant pattern designs make weaving enjoyable as well as fast, and I can weaved even if I am viewing TELEVISION, albeit an uncommon occurence for me personally! With the net, also if you stay in an area that is little, you aren't restricted to your regional area, and also can locate people not simply around the UK, but throughout the globe as well! After that enhance with infant pictures and such, then take it to your local copy shop, like Kinkos, and also have them publish the web page on pastel tinted paper. In some cases weve come across local street fairs or windsurfing events or a model train gallery. Weve spoke about endometriosis, that which can be a cyst. So, you can have hemorrhaging with a cyst but a lot of the moment those are rare scenarios. The endometriomas, if they persist, and also theres constant bleeding in the abdomen and the ovary that can trigger attachments. Any kind of hemorrhaging cyst can be a trouble. A maternity with a corpus luteum, the 2nd kind of functional cyst goes on to establish as the baby is growing. Most of these, the larger blood materials, the larger blood vessels on cysts are typically the corpus luteum cyst. The majority of ovary cysts in and of themselves are not going to be creating an issue. Yet, the essential point here, is that cysts themselves, in and also of themselves are not going to be a trouble or harmful problem. The nature of the celebration is most likely mosting likely to tend in the direction of the feminine side; if the coordinators of the event have a stipulation for this, then welcoming males would certainly be great. Without a doubt, there are numerous males as well as ladies that are making good cash making use of the net business course. In this song, the poet uses the affective story to acknowledge that some guys "dont be comin right ", however that he has a different assumption of females than these various other males. Supposed to assist with the discomfort, meant to aid me keep In this song, Guru makes use of the different story to share his view of what love need to be. It is vital for the garments to be completely dry prior to they are done away with or put on by a youngster, as well as hanging the clothing on kids clothing wall mounts will certainly aid keep their form. Nonetheless, aspartame was allowed on 1981 for dry goods and also 1983 for carbonated drinks.

free baby stuff expecting mother

People utilized to exchange items as well as services for other goods as well as solutions prior to money was developed, and some people still barter today to stay clear of utilizing cash (mostly for tax factors I am informed). A few other fantastic solutions are a diaper solution for cloth diapering mommies, or also a diaper distribution solution for disposables, and also pay for the very first 2 weeks or a month well worth of diapering products. Even the colors made use of in the textile must be natural and also non-toxic. You might be at first attracted by all the eye memorable shades as well as the fanciness of the clothing, but if your child is not going to like it, it is mosting likely to spoil. Pyjamas and also bodysuits for little child women been available in all various colors and also styles, and are produced all sorts of weather. One or two pieces would do - a pair of babies suits, a set of t shirts, a pair of pyjamas. At the same time, you can put a Tee shirts over their pyjamas. They will certainly safeguard and also insure any kind of money you put right into an interest-bearing account as well as pay you perhaps 3% yearly passion on your down payment. They understand that if you're pleased with your sample, greater than likely you be become a routine consumer and invest loan with them. There are really a lot of free offers offered; you just require to recognize exactly how to look for them. Or search by chemical ingredients (see list listed below for some examples) and also uncover what brand names include it. Next off, you will certainly arrive at your search result page; this is a listing of all products that meet your search standards. Allow us take a peek right into what makes these standards a need to for those moms and dads buying baby garments. Additionally, let your initial couple of road experiences educate you what you need to have along. There are countless very first time mothers available that have a great deal of info to show you as well as they do not desire you to be without the details. They wish to have outfits with breathable fabric and also simple on the body. Is this what we have concerned, - everybody in our area enjoys the exact same adverts, the very same programmes, the exact same newspaper article every single day or evening? Keep in mind: After trying solitary foods, great mixes are potatoes and carrots or carrots as well as peas. And not just will I review it for him, Ill make it seem like the Elvis of foods, because Im already quite certain that Sickness like a hamdog. He likewise describes his love passion as "this Ethiopian queen from Philly ", utilizing the imperial characterization so usual in spiritual love stories. If you're actually strapped for cash money, then you can most likely make do with utilizing your bed as a changing table, however if you can, this is something I extremely advise. Its better to feed child first point in the morning, after that permit some play or rest time in between before offering infant a bath. At a "Pamper Event," a concept increasingly preferred for moms who currently have several kids and for that reason the majority of right stuff they really need, they might take house spa devices such as a loofah or bubble bath. A wonderful bath-themed present basket would contain some hypo-allergenic bathroom items, like infant baths, talcum powder, towels, and bathroom toys.

The significant plus is that many, if not all of these totally free products, are supplied right to the mommy's residence. And, with that, lets solve down to the nitty abrasive. Do you have the software you require to start? Eventually you are mosting likely to intend to transfer your baby, so you will need to acquire something. Unless you're intending to hang on to them for your following baby, they're simply gathering dust. With a couple of easy skills, an useful collection of "stuff, " and also simply a little bit of planning as well as preparation, youll get on your way! There is an area for TV in our lives as well as it seeks all the fastest method of taking in information from worldwide. Taking courses abroad Here, the poet makes use of the spiritual narrative to define the time, area as well as emotions that his love was founded on, speaking of them as if they were in some way meant to take place. Perhaps she thought that was her location in the world and also no-one could fault her if she did her tasks to the utmost of her capability. I once had a neighbor who informed the globe as well as it's mommy she thought sanitation was beside Godliness as well as invested all the time daily cleaning her residence. It is thought that from this you truly have the choice to look into every little thing prior to you also need to get something. Tight neck lines would certainly problem you and also also the positioning of buttons at odd positions would certainly create you issues, so check these beforehand. At the exact same time the buttons and also various other aspects in the style must be thoroughly stitched. However Betty had the cash money each time I mosted likely to prison This song further illustrates using contrasting narratives to share love. This instance better shows making use of initial language in conversational narratives. The poet feels it is unacceptable for any individual to "call you out your name ", or simply put, utilize demeaning language towards his love. Many of the baby shower ideas will work for any location, indoors or out. Do you desire your baby to look cute or awesome with child garments however you don't have ideas on where to look for them? Cost is a major thing you would certainly want to take into consideration when purchasing infant clothing. It's easy, look at an infant garments shop. Clothing treatment plays a huge role in your baby's security. Thus, it is always recommended that you maintain the safety and security as well as comfort consider mind even when you are buying event outfits for your kid. Also when you have purchased a lacy blouse for your tiny girl, if you finish up getting a dimension that occurs to be a little larger than her actual size, she will be comfortable in it. And also, moms and dads will certainly be likely to maintain purchasing garments to stay on par with the changes in the child's growth - dimension, weight, size, and also shape. Thus, buying garments that are somewhat bigger than the actual size of your babys body gifts will be good as it makes certain maximum comfort for the youngster.

Nevertheless, these immunization procedures will only make their systems solid however it doesn't offer an assurance that germs can't penetrate their method. So why did she act this way? The same thing can be real with, certainly with tube maternities, thats why those two can be confused. Yes it is real that infant garments do not last long with youngsters expanding as fast as they do, but caring for a children clothing is still just as, otherwise more, important. Hip-Hop, you the love of my life which's real This flow is special due to the fact that it utilizes both the metaphoric and different narrative strategies. The presentation of Hip-Hop enjoy stories is a really uphill struggle. And that leads us to one of the most preferred metaphoric Hip-Hop love narrative of our time. Babies will like this meal. Thick as well as fluffy clothing will certainly maintain the infant warm from head to toe. Here is a list of preferred things that has been researched with a few of the largest online merchants of baby products. Below are several of the standard points you'll desire to have. Do you wish to provide a present to a brand-new mother without spending a whole lot of cash? They utilize it when washing to get rid of smells, soften the textiles, and also give your baby as well as kid apparel a fresh and extra natural scent. When you are considering your kids comfort, its not only about the layout of the apparel youre buying it will certainly likewise be an issue of exactly how the thing rests on your children body. Consider just how much you have into the product. The following time you are re-assembling your package, make sure to include that thing. I prefer to hang around with my household as well as friends, talking on the phone, choosing lengthy strolls or dancing the evening away. With all that having actually been stated, Ive discovered a brand-new food that I understand I'm mosting likely to enjoy. Quickly you'll discover that having just a few wonderful outfits ends up being unwise. I had an excellent cost-free site a couple of years ago I saw on a daily basis. Use your Roadway Adventure logbook to record everybodies remarks concerning the day. This will certainly serve no excellent as getting child items indiscriminately will not just be waste of cash but additionally waste of time and also power which you can put for some useful use. If passing by automobile you should constantly make use of a child seat as well as comply with the supplier's guidelines for suitable. If your trip restriction is no even more than a one-hour cars and truck ride one way, then look for areas of passion within regarding 40 miles of house. Which is not an issue because just like kidneys, simply like testis, females with one ovary can have equally as many infants as a female with two ovaries as well as two tubes. Obviously it is a 2x matrix, meaning those first 2 individuals you got to sign up with are on your initial level. You should constantly have 2 pairs during the night time, because you never know when a baby is mosting likely to spit up or have a diaper leak that can require a complete garment change.

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#free #baby #stuff

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gaygajeel · 7 years

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Yes! The ways Fairy tail does anatomy wrong! Thank you :3 ( Sorry about that, I'm really nervous D: )

its ok!! im glad to be able to help out with this kind of stuff

this got pretty lengthy so its gonna be under cut! heres some links that may also help, i dont think i forgot anything super important?

i have a general art ref tag on my main , general arm references

how to draw breasts video (nsfwish of course) , foreshortening

figure drawing tips

hands for drawing (3d models of hands you can play around with (warning it greets u with a torso model that has a ding dong out))

how to connect legs to the torso (highly stylized,but good things to keep in mind)

while some things can vary from style to style, i bolded the basic rules of anatomy if you dont wanna stick to just realism. mashimas style is actually closer to realism than a cartoon, most exaggerated things arent style but anatomy problems. things of his that are stylized for example are the eyes. he actually has really got down how to make eyes bigger than usual and not have it look wrong/bad.

first and foremost, the most noticeable thing in many ft drawings is the boobs.

boobs are not perfect circles for one. an important thing to remember when drawing boobs is that gravity affects them. when standing upwards, boobs will be pulled downwards and a fold against the skin is noticeable. this of course changed depending on the pose of the character, such as if they are lying down they will lean more towards the sides.

the best thing to coach yourself on making sure the boobs arent too big is to make sure they are not bigger than the head.

while boobs do jiggle during many forms of exercise, having a female character not have good support for their breasts is very... unrealistic, as most ppl with boobs tend to get aches from this sort of thing. different support can do different things though. sports bras typically keep The JiggleTM to a low, while there are special bras for pushing up your breasts to make them look bigger & cleavage more noticeable.

other factors to take into account: boobs are attached to skin that go up to the arm pit, so if the arm is more upwards this can affect where the boob is as skin is tightening. boobs are soft, but not jelly.

boobs arent smack dab on the chest unless the before mentioned push up bras are in play. they hang about, but also dont go on the abdomen, they basically dont go over the rib cage.

also, nipples come in all different kinds of sizes & placements but are typically 2 head lengths down and the angle is outwards.

the torso

hips & waist are big issues in ft. hips typically shouldnt be bigger than shoulders unless part of character design/body type

waists shouldnt be too much smaller than ribcage. a good thing to remember is that your character is supposed to have organs in there. unless they are meant to be malnourished or have a very skinny body type, avoid it. looking up diagrams of muscles & organs around there helps me define how big this portion should be.

there are all kinds of body shapes, especially with feminine characters. typical ones are hour glass (small waist), diamond (large waist & hips, sometimes actually bigger than shoulders), rectangle (hips, shoulders, and waist are basically the same shape), triangle (small hips & waist, big shoulders, the common body type for guys), inverted triangle/pear (small shoulders & waist, big hips)... the list goes on and on, really.

even when you have abs, when you bend over your skin folds/rolls up. its natural!

male & female musculature isnt really much different from one another. what differs is the bones & fat placements.

since you have stuff in ur tummy, i wouldnt say it bulges out but its certainly not just a straight line. its more noticeable if theres tight clothes involved, the area is showing, or its a side view.

legs/thighs

thighs gaps are not as common as you think. thighs support much of our body and are meant to be big as theres lots of muscle & fat.

you cant really have big thighs & big thigh gaps like mashima makes it. sometimes it kinda looks like he gives them hip dyspepsia honestly. basically, you either have skinny thighs & a gap, or thick thighs & no gap. while some ppl may be uncomfy with this part, its also important that you know how to define the crotch, gap or not. this is much easier with vaginas than penises though and vaginas you can get away with just a V between the thighs.

the thickness of the thighs affect how big the ass will be (thicker thighs = bigger butt).

half of body is legs while the other half is torso & head.

knee placement varies & depends on body type, but is normally about in the middle of the leggo.

other notes

an easy way to make sure the size of your hands are right is to compare it to the characters face. when putting the beginning of the palm on the beginning of the face/chin, fingers end a bit above eyes or eyebrows. this is something that can vary as well, such as if you want a character to look creepy you typically give them longer fingers.

necks are meant to support the head. while drawing them smaller than usual is a common part of lots of peoples drawings, you want to at least make sure your character has a neck that wont easily snap. necks are about the size of your head, as if you feel up it it stops at your ear. there are only certain types of bodies this can go well with, pearl from SU being a good example because she overall has a very small body type.

theres a difference between flexible & wrong anatomy. someone may have a back that can easily bend certain ways, but there are limits. bones & muscles will limit you.

fairy tail has odd ear placements in which they tend to go above the eye even in face-forward views- avoid that. putting ears around the same place as the nose tends to do the trick, with ears ending around eye level.

if you want to intentionally give a character supper skinny arms like mashima does, this has to go with the body type, and it also affects how visible the collarbone is.

ft has a really weird habit of making reeaallly angled collarbones. collarbones start a bit below the neck (neck muscles coming down to them), and go to the shoulder. collarbone visibility depends on body type as mentioned before, and the pose of the character. you wont see the collarbone of a character with an arm reaching up. often times when the characters posed is relaxed, the collarbone will actually just look like a straight line.

not sure if this really counts as anatomy but mashima makes hair look like ribbons at times when they are 2 completely different textures & materials. hair goes all about, not just one solid direction.

the lower the eyes are, the younger the character looks. placement of eyes is actually really important when it comes to age.

when drawing a character with muscle, make sure you think of weight & depth! dont just give them lines where muscles should be, or you get.....Noodlebuster. muscles are heavy & defined.

arms typically stop at hips (when saying arms i am excluding hands). this can be a very hard thing to maintain when having your character do dynamic poses, so the foreshortening video linked above should help with that.

unless its part of your style, legs that look like straight lines are gonna look funky (when looking at a skeleton you see the bones are more curved)

mashima tends to make the back of the head wayy too big, and this really makes his neck problem evident.

i really wish i could make diagrams & drawings of my own to help get the point across better but its late, so if you want me too i can put that on my to-do list!

#ask #that-otaku-chick

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mikemarko567-blog · 5 years

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Beginner’s Guide on How to Market on LinkedIn — Mike Marko

“Beginner’s Guide on How to Market on LinkedIn” written by Mike Marko.

Using LinkedIn to market your business is one way to expand your reach and increase sales.

But there’s something you should know…

To get real results on LinkedIn, you need to use its features the right way.

I know how frustrating it can be when you struggle to get results despite your best efforts. I know because I was there a couple years ago. I too struggled with LinkedIn.

So I studied LinkedIn very closely and learned the best ways to use its features.

And now I want to share what I’ve learned.

That’s why my goal today is to help you understand how to market on LinkedIn by using the platform effectively.

Simple Tips on How to Market on LinkedIn

LinkedIn is a social networking platform, just like Facebook and Twitter. The difference is that LinkedIn’s design is more focused on business and employment.

However, that doesn’t make LinkedIn less effective as a marketing platform. In fact, it has its own advantages.

With LinkedIn, you can promote your business not just to consumers but also topotential investors or partners. It’s even one of the top social platforms for B2B (business to business) marketers, according to the 2018 Social Media Marketing Industry Report.

But it’s only worth it if you know how to market on LinkedIn properly. The easiest way to do that is to get your basics right. Let’s start with the obvious: the profile and company page.

Fix Your Account and Company Page

So you already have your LinkedIn profile and company page. You think everything’s set — but don’t be too sure.

You see, one factor that might be causing your marketing efforts to underachieve is your profile. That’s because a lot of people don’t really put thought into it… even though it’s technically others’ first point of reference for them on the network.

Be Business-Oriented

Remember, LinkedIn is a business-oriented platform. So, be professional and truthful in it. This is one thing everyone should remember in how to market on Linkedin.

Don’t use a comic book character’s name as your display name. Don’t use your cat’s photo as your profile picture. And don’t put down 1428 Elm Street as your office address.

Use your real name and a high-quality, professional headshot. If you have a business address you want to share, use it.

Just remember that you want people viewing your page to take you seriously. It’s hard to do that if they see you treating even vital information as a joke.

Fill Out Your Company Page

As for your company page, it should look legitimate. For example, make sure to use images that actually represent your business for the profile picture.

Then, for the cover photo, pick something that describes your company or the services you offer. Don’t just settle for that default header image LinkedIn provides.

Fill out all important details about your business too. Give a quick summary that describes what your company does or how your services and products help consumers. Note your office’s address, contact number, website URL, etc.

If you don’t have a company page yet, you can read my blog post, Create Business Page | Increase Your LinkedIn Engagements. It can help you figure out how to start.

Think of Your Marketing Goals

It’s important to outline your goals as these will be the foundations of your short–and long-term marketing plan. If you know what you want to achieve, you’ll find it easier to come up with what to do.

What’s more, your marketing goals will help you find your target audience and think of the best ways to approach them on the platform. In short, the goals help you focus your LinkedIn marketing efforts and cut down on wasted time and resources.

Optimizing Your LinkedIn Page

You’ll also need to optimize your page to reach your target audience and get their attention.

Page optimization increases your business’s visibility on the Internet. Businesses with an online presence do this to increase brand awareness and customer reach.

So how can you optimize? For starters, you can use search engine optimization and audience targeting.

Use Search Engine Optimization

One of the keys to learning how to market on Linkedin is search engine optimization or SEO. It’s the most common method of increasing a website’s visibility on the Internet.

If you do SEO on your company page, you will begin to see increased traffic to your website. Paired with the right strategies, that can also lead to more profit.

Consider using the following methods to optimize your company page:

Use the right keywords. This is the easiest way to increase your visibility on the Internet. Use keywords that are relevant to your industry and that people would search for if they needed someone offering your services.

Link your website. Linking the company’s LinkedIn page to your company website is crucial for gaining leads and converting site visitors into customers.

Provide content. Sharing relevant content will also help improve your ranking in search results. When you share valuable and informative articles or video with your target audience, they’re more likely to trust in your business.

Be Specific in Targeting Your Audience

Aside from the SEO methods, targeting can also help you reach your preferred audiences.

Defining your target audience will allow you to make decisions based on what your ideal customer looks like. This can improve the odds of conversion and even benefits your customers by making it easier for them to find what you offer.

Don’t be afraid to narrow down your target audience. Narrowing your niche can help you identify parts of the market that — in some cases — you might even dominate.

Increase Your Followers

Having a large number of followers will increase your chances of getting more views. It also means broader brand exposure.

The easiest way to do this is to ask your friends, colleagues, or employees to promote your page.

Encourage them to share your content on their page so that it’ll reach more people. Just make sure you add a ‘Follow’ button on your page so they will receive updates when you post.

Provide High-Quality Content

Providing high-quality content is one of the most important aspects of learning how to market on LinkedIn effectively.

Just like on other social networking platforms, you need to constantly provide compelling and engaging content to keep your audience interested and loyal. It could be articles with solid and reliable facts or inspirational/educational videos.

If your business has only a few followers, try LinkedIn advertising. Paid advertisements can help get your business in front of your competitors in search engines.

Be Active in Your Niche

Another tip for how to market on LinkedIn is being active. By that I mean you should use your LinkedIn account on a regular basis.

Being active contributes to your authority and brand presence. You want people to know you’re currently part of your industry.

Post Regular Status Updates

Posting regularly can help build your online presence. Not only does being active increase your social proof, but it also makes people want to see your updates.

But take note, the things you post should always be of interest to your audience. Otherwise, you’re just putting out content that doesn’t really have eyeballs waiting to see it.

You don’t want to throw fliers into the wind and pray one of them just happens to land on someone interested in what they’re advertising.

Participate in Relevant Groups

Participating in relevant groups is another way to be active in your niche. Join groups related to your business and interests. Participate in discussions to establish yourself as an expert in your field.

Just avoid spamming your audience. Don’t always try to sell to them because they’ll learn to ignore you if you do that. Instead, answer questions and communicate with them to build their trust.

Final Thoughts on How to Market on LinkedIn

Marketing on LinkedIn can help your business grow. It can gain you more customers and increase your sales… BUT only when you do things right.

There are a lot of things that you can do wrong. Your profile could lack information or professionalism, for example.

You could also lack a defined marketing plan or even goals. You might have failed to narrow down your target audience and thus failed to put up the right content for them.

Fixing all of these things can make all the difference to your LinkedIn marketing.

By the way, if you need help marketing your business, feel free to contact me or check out the wide array of services we offer that have helped many businesses grow and expand.

If you have more questions about how to market on LinkedIn, leave them in the comments section below. Be sure also to check out my Starter’s Guide to LinkedIn Marketing.

Be sure to also check out Pervasive Presence™ and learn how you can integrate LinkedIn into an overall marketing strategy.

You can also check out this LinkedIn Marketing 101 Guide for Business.

If you need help with your LinkedIn account, planning your services and/or products, running marketing campaigns like Facebook ads, or creating capture pages or lead magnets, then feel free to contact me and we can talk about the different consulting options we offer. Or use the link below to apply for your “results in advance” free consultation and let’s get started right away:

P.S. – If you like this post, feel free comment down below and/or share on Facebook.

Have questions and want to connect?

Add me on Facebook then shoot me a message:

http://www.Facebook.com/mike.marko.37

Suggested Articles: 1. LinkedIn 101: How to Create LinkedIn Page for Business 2. 5 Reasons To Use LinkedIn For Business Marketing 3. How To Do LinkedIn Marketing Without Any Mistakes

Author: Mike Marko Click here to contact Mike

If you want a system to help you rank in Google just like I do, then check out IM Consultant Services.

Article: Beginner’s Guide on How to Market on LinkedIn

#howtomarketonLinkedIn #MikeMarko

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viralhottopics · 7 years

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Dishing the dirt on detox | Jay Rayner

A self-confessed glutton, Jay Rayner has always been wary of the January detox. But after talking to experts and sampling some of the products, hes discovered the truth is even worse than he imagined

Sunday afternoon in the darkest days of early January and I am sitting on the sofa, my face caked in a mixture of clay mined from deep below the Atlas mountains and organic rosewater from the Dades Valley. My cheeks and brows are a mess of coagulating geography. I am giving myself a home facial, courtesy of Facetox, a product originating from Leeds which promises to Extract, Pull & Detoxify. The box says its cruelty free, but doing this to myself feels rather less so.

In my hand is a steaming mug of Dr Stuarts Liver Detox naturally caffeine-free tea, containing dandelion root, centaury herb and milk thistle. The tea promises to get it out your system without saying exactly what it might be. Before applying the mask I drank a glass of lemonade the colour of an outflow from a flooded coal mine. It is produced by Press London, is 0.05% activated charcoal and has the word detox on the label.

The face mask starts drying out, pulling my skin taut underneath. I begin to feel a bit of an arse, because the one thing all these products apparently claim to do detoxify me, purge me of poisons is the one thing they cannot do. Yes, I may have indulged over Christmas: drunk deep, eaten broadly, hit the sugars and the fats like a train ramming the buffers. But I know nothing with the word detox on the label will mitigate any of it.

The whole idea does make me smile, says Dr Donal ODonoghue, professor of renal medicine at Manchester University and president of the Renal Association, because it is cobblers. There is nothing like this which will improve your bodys detoxification system.

Nor does there need to be because of what butchers would call our offal, and Ill call our kidneys and liver these organs have that whole detox business covered for us. The liver processes what we put into ourselves. The kidneys then filter it out. There is nothing we can eat which will improve liver and kidney function, says Dimple Thakrar, spokesperson for the British Dietetic Association. As long as you are eating a normal, balanced diet your body will do exactly what it needs to do. Without our liver and kidneys we would die of poisoning, she says. The whole notion of detox is not merely redundant but, to put it in technical terms, a dumb-ass symptom of a deep well of scientific illiteracy which enables sane people to believe whatever unsubstantiated, anti-modern, counter-intuitive, make-it-up-as-we-go-along, bottom-feeding blather thats shoved in front of us.

Mud, glorious mud: Jay Rayner tries a facemask which, the packet says, will extract, pull and detoxify

And yet the myth of the January detox endures. Cosmetics companies spew forth literature on products they promise will purge your skin of all the poisons they have absorbed merely by living in the 21st century. Juice companies offer detoxifying cleanses. You want your liver to be as shiny and fresh as a newborns? Someone somewhere believes they have a product for that. Reputable newspapers OK, the Daily Mirror fill their pages with hokum and woo about the need to re-alkalise your system by eating plant algaes which help your body detoxify quickly.

The obvious response is to mutter a fool and their money and move on. Certainly, purifying yourself is a quick way to cleanse your wallet of money. That Facetox pack costs 24.99 for seven masks and, according to Dr Tamara Griffiths of the British Association of Dermatologists, will not detoxify you at all. Nothing applied to the skin will do that. It may take off some dead skin cells, but thats not really the same thing, she says. The tea is 4.40 a box. The activated charcoal lemonade retails at 6 for 330ml.

The odd face mask or drink of tea isnt going to do you any harm, but there can be a darker side to it if you go for a whole regime and choose the wrong one. This month a paper in the British Medical Journal reported the recent case of a 47-year-old woman admitted to hospital, suffering from seizures brought on by low sodium levels in her blood. She had been undergoing a herbal medication detox, alongside drinking vast amounts of water, green tea and sage. She recovered entirely once her sodium levels were returned to normal, but otherwise might indeed have been cleansed, if only from the face of the earth. The paper reported another case of a man who experienced fits after undertaking a similar regime.

It frustrates me when people bang on about detox, says Thakrar, because it can actually cause harm. The evidence suggests that by following a so-called detox, especially ones involving fasting, you can damage liver enzyme activity and therefore damage your bodys ability to detoxify itself. Likewise, she says, reducing calories for the short term can reduce your metabolic rate and you can end up putting on more weight in the long term.

I show her literature from a company offering tailor-made juice-cleanse packages delivered to your door for hundreds of pounds which they say will detoxify your body and reset your metabolism. They proclaim celebrity endorsements from the likes of Madonna, Georgia May Jagger and Gwyneth Paltrow.

Theres no evidence to back up any of the claims, Thakrar says. Theyre nonsensical. I suppose the positive is that youd get a lot of fruit and vegetables, but were adults and we have teeth. We dont need our food juiced. Plus, you could end up consuming enormous amounts of sugar. Wheres the protein? Wheres the calcium?

You would think there would be laws covering this sort of thing, and there are. Any health claims made for food or cosmetics have to be backed up by scientifically rigorous research which is then assessed, since 2007, by the relevant European Union body. In the case of food it is the European Food Safety Agency. Applications for a valid claim of a detoxifying effect have been made for a dozen foodstuffs, including grapefruit, seaweed and a rice vinegar extract. All have been refused. But, as Im told by David Pickering of the Trading Standards Institute, which has responsibility for messages on packaging: It is very hard to police the health-claims market, not least in the age of the internet when products might be coming in from places where regulation is different.

Talking to the companies in this country responsible for detox products and their marketing is not always a rewarding experience. In a south London branch of Boots I find racks of multi-vitamins. While none of these say they rid your body of poisons, the sign above the shelves does say Detox. Boots tells me it was a mistake, and left over from an installation put up in 2007 and would be taken down immediately. I ask the manufacturer of Dr Stuarts Liver Detox tea, based in Storrington, West Sussex, how it detoxifies the liver and what research they have to back up the message that it could get it out your system. Arran Elliott of Dr Stuarts replies: We have decided to abstain from commenting on this matter. Oh.

Its tricky to work out when detox became a necessary cure for lifestyle rather than genuine poisoning. Illustration: Eva Bee

Ed Foy of Press London, which manufacturers the activated charcoal lemonade, is more forthcoming. First, we dont make direct claims about their impact on a persons body, he tells me by email. As we know this would put us into a category of therapeutic regulation and would be beyond our remit as a consumer food company. Indeed it would, though he goes on to point out that charcoal is used in other clinical detoxifying processes. Perhaps, but is that any excuse for turning out a lemonade which looks like pond water?

As to the justification for putting the word detox on the bottle, this is apparently a massive category error on my part. Apparently and its worth reading this explanation in full I was confusing the publics vernacular use of detox in common parlance and the medical term detoxification. Today, if someone says I am doing a January detox they mean that they are cutting out negative factors in their consumption habits, such as alcohol, smoking and foods rich in sugar, fat or salt. Therefore when we talk about detox to a consumer the consumer understands we are promoting the preferential consumption of healthier products rather than harmful ones and not referring specifically to the process of detoxification by the liver and or kidneys.

Say what? This is my mistake? The fact that detox is short for detoxification and that, in every dictionary the word is defined as variations on the removal of poisons from the body has nothing to do with it? I make myself another cup of Dr Stuarts Liver Detox tea to see if that will calm me down. It doesnt. I study a pack of cleansing detox foot pads made in China for Organic Guru. You bandage them to your feet while you sleep and apparently the active ingredients vinegar, plant powder and something called minus ion work wonders. The main functions according to the pack are detoxification beauty, clear physical beauty, stimulate metabolism, enhance immune function. Not bad for 6.99. If it wasnt utter tosh.

Detoxification does, of course, have a medical meaning, involving treatments for narcotic addiction or overdose. It is, therefore, tricky to work out when detox became seen as a necessary cure for lifestyle rather than genuine poisoning. However, according to Dr Alun Withey, historian of medicine at Exeter University, it is less a modern phenomenon than a notion that reaches back to our pre-pharmacological past. There is a striking similarity between modern media ideas of detox and 17th-century versions of medical treatments to drive out the bad things, he says. The literature of the period, including that by renowned herbalist Thomas Culpeper, is full of remedies against a surfeit, he says. Culpeper in turn recycles a lot of stuff thats centuries old about restoring the body to balance.

Judy Swift, associate professor of behavioural nutrition at Nottingham University, also sees a link with the past. If you go back to the early Christian period there is the strong idea that the pleasure food gives you is a temptation and we rise above these things because we are not animals. We prove our moral worth by not doing it. Modern notions of detox echo all this. However, she says, there is also very much a link to modern health policy. While the medical fraternity may laugh in the face of detox products, she points out that government health advice eat five portions of fruit and veg a day, avoid certain fats, cut out the fizzy drinks is hardly dissimilar. The message of that advice, she says, is that to be healthy you have to work at it. It requires denial. It has to be medicalised. It has to be hard won. Which sounds very much like a juice cleanse or gargling with sooty lemonade.

After I wash off my clay detoxifying face mask, I study my skin. It is a bit pink in places, but otherwise there is no difference from before, which makes sense given my skin wasnt poisoned in the first place. It merely serves to highlight the sadness of people landing themselves in A&E with seizures as a result of an ill-judged detox they thought was good for them. I run myself a bath and pour in bright orange granules of Total Detox Bath Potion, the colour of childrens sweets. Made by a company called Ancient Wisdom, they are apparently infused with potent aromatic oils and cost 4.74 a pack. They give the water a yellowish tinge, like someone has peed in it. I settle back and wait for the poisons to dissipate from my body. Nothing happens.

Still, its a nice bath.