#and u aren't... supposed to be honest with them?

[teardrop-scales]

Hi I have a request! How about a love potion one shot or head canon with lmk Wukong and fem (s/o)? Please and thank u 🙏🏻

Love potion: Sun Wukong x reader headcannons 🧪

A.N: I decided to do this in a headcannon format, but more story-driven one, and I actually changed your request a bit so Wukong and reader aren't a couple yet in this. Hope that's okay!

You were having a peaceful afternoon after your early morning shift at work when MK called you.

You were surprised at this; you knew he was supposed to be training with your friend/crush Wukong and usually that made him quite busy and unreachable. So you knew that something must've happened.

When you picked up the phone , it turned out that The Monkey King himself somehow accidentally drank a love potion that he had in his stash of artifacts and other useless things.

MK wasn't exactly sure how the potion worked; on the bottle it was only written that, thankfully, the effects last only for a day or so, and the poor kid couldn't exactly ask his mentor about it right now. Besides, you were sure that Wukong wouldn't know even in the right/normal state of mind.

According to MK, the monkey acted somewhat normal for a few minutes, until he saw you in the photo he had of you two stashed somewhere. Then the potion truly started to kick in. At least that's what you think happened, provided you understood MK's frantic explanation correctly.

And to summarize, the boy wanted you to take care of Wukong for a bit until the potion stopped working, since the monkey was apparently constantly bugging him about wanting to see you. You could even hear Monkey King gushing about you and cutting in through MK's phone "to say hi".

You kinda feared what it would be like. You just hoped he wouldn't be too overbearing and that you won't explode from flusteredness, given you had a crush on Monkey King and thanks to the potion, he was in love with YOU of all people.

But you knew that MK had to go to his afternoon shift at Pigsy's, and Wukong couldn't be left alone in this state, so of course you agreed.

So in a short amount of time MK was standing in front of your apartment door with the Monkey King behind him. The boy thanked you once again and then he was gone. Leaving you alone with your lovesick crush.

His eyes were much wider than normal, and there was a slight pink gleam in them. He also had a wide smile on his face, his tail swishing behind him. Basically all the signs that he was happy.

"Peaches, I'm so glad to see you!"

He exclaimed in a much more higher pitched and cheerful voice than normally before crushing you in a hug.

"Yeah, good to see you too, Wukong" You replied and awkwardly reciprocated the hug, while Sun buried his face in the crook of your neck and inhaled your scent.

Overall Wukong was much more cheerful, talkative and emotional than normal under the effect of the potion.

After the hug he started asking you a ton of questions, like, how was your day? How are you feeling today? No demon tried to attack you since he last saw you, right? Etc.

You also noticed that he called you 'Peaches' a lot. Of course, sometimes he did call you that before the potion, but only sometimes and he always acted like that was a slip up. He usually calls you by your name or similarly to MK, 'bud'/'buddy', maybe 'pal' sometimes.

To be honest, you weren't sure what to do with Wukong and how to keep him busy and not bored until the potion stopped working. So you suggested watching a movie.

And of course, probably 'cause of his lovesick state, he chose a romantic comedy...

It's not like you've never watched that kind of movie with him before, you actually did - you both liked to make fun of the characters and point out the corny and cringy aspects of the movies, but this time Wukong was really invested in a way he never was before.

The second you both sat on your couch, the monkey clung to you, hugging and cuddling you like a teddy bear. He was so close it was impossible for him to be any closer to you. Wukong pressed his furred cheek against yours and curled up to your side, his tail curling around your ankle.

Meanwhile you just sat there, inwardly screaming and having a panic attack at how close and intimate he was right now, and how much you liked it and secretly wished he wouldn't let go. And he didn't for the whole movie, being too invested in it to notice or care about you blushing.

This time he also made comments during the movie (that's just the way he is, sometimes he just can't keep completely quiet for that long), but not snarky/mocking ones. Instead he kept staring at the screen with sparkles in his eyes each time the characters did something which could be considered "romantic" and saying something along the lines of "Ooh, that is so romantic! Wouldn't it be nice if we did something like that, Peaches?" Or change his mood completely and ask with a smug expression "Soo, what did you think? What would YOU think if SOMEONE did something like this for YOU?"

Summarizing, he was VERY subtle...

You tried to answer both honestly and nice enough not to hurt his feelings. But, truth be told, you lied a few times so he wouldn't feel bad/hurt. You felt slightly guilty about lying to your friend/crush, even about such stupid things. Oh well, if you're lucky, Wukong won't remember any of this.

To be honest, you were thankful that this whole love potion experience took a pretty lovey-dovey route and not... Y'know, the more suggestive and lustful one? Because when it comes to Wukong it sometimes could be both. It probably also depended on the potion itself.

So yeah, you were grateful that the most he did was throw a more suggestive comment with this smug face of his here and there.

After the movie ended, you figured it was a good time for dinner.

Right after you started getting off the couch and out of Wukong's grasp, he asked with a pouty tone where were you going.

"I'm just going to the kitchen to make pancakes for dinner. With peaches~" You added in a sing-songy voice. You knew how much your monkey friend loved those fruits, so you always made sure to have some at your house just in case.

"Oh!" Wukong's face lit up slightly at the mention of his favorite fruits. "You don't have to get up though! I can make the pancakes with no problem, you don't have to do anything, in fact, you don't even have to get off the couch! I'll do everything for you, no biggie. You must be so tired after your morning shift today, Peaches! Besides, I'm a pro at cooking!"

You barely managed to hide a snort after his last sentence. It was endearing that he wanted to spoil you and do things so you wouldn't have to but he definitely wasn't a pro at cooking. You taught him some basics and thanks to that The Monkey King was able to cook simple dishes so they were actually edible. But not much more than that.

However, you agreed for two reasons: one, so you wouldn't hurt his feelings (it was so cute how his eyes and entire face shined and how bright his smile was when you said "okay"), and two; you were quite curious how this would turn out.

"Okay, but call me if you need help."

"You're so sweet, Peaches! But that won't be necessary."

After that Wukong went to the kitchen.

In short, it turned out that Sun mistook powdered sugar for flour, so the pancakes were... Quite a disaster, honestly.

You had to console the poor Monkey for a few minutes, because he felt like he failed and disappointed you. He was practically close to tears (that potion really did make him much more emotional, huh?)

He only cheered up after you suggested ordering something from Pigsy's. And of course, being the gentleman he suddenly became thanks to the potion, he insisted he should be the one to make the call. You could imagine that the pig wasn't very happy to hear him, but nonetheless after some time your order arrived with MK to your door.

"So, how is he?" Asked the teen. "I hope he was... Umm... Well behaved?"

"He was actually. It's just that he's much more cheerful and emotional than normal." You chuckled.

After that you invited MK inside, since he just ended his shift while bringing your and Wukong's order.

You and your crush ate your dishes and MK ate some chips you had in the kitchen. Meanwhile Wukong kept gushing about you to the teen, making you very flustered and flattered at the same time.

"I just love you Peaches so much!" Happily exclaimed Wukong at one moment.

Then a small, quiet gasp escaped your lips. Oh, how much you wished he truly meant those words. But you knew that this was just the potion talking, sadly.

After that MK suggested he should take Wukong back to the Flower Fruit Mountain since he ended his shift now.

Unfortunately, Sun heard that and he wasn't pleased. He immediately embraced you and squished you tightly against himself and kept saying how he needed to stay to protect you from demons or burglars breaking into your house. And also claiming that he doesn't want to be alone and that he had such a good time with you, so he didn't want it to end. Wukong was pretty much like an emotional child thanks to the potion at that moment. MK tried to pry him off you, but to no avail.

You had to promise Wukong that he could come over the next day in order for him to let you go and calm down.

Finally Sun agreed to go with MK, but not before hugging you tightly once more, kissing your cheek and saying "Love you, Peaches!".

You couldn't help but let out a sigh of relief when Monkey King left with his successor. This was an interesting experience, but it was quite tiring too. You also had many complicated emotions after this and needed a lot of time to process them. All of this just made you realize how hopeless you were in your crush on Monkey King himself and, how badly you wanted him to truly love you.

Later, in the evening, you suddenly grew curious about the love potion which your friend drank. So you decided to call Tang to check if he knew something about it; after all, who else could have such knowledge if not him?

"A love potion you say? Hmm... Well I do recall hearing some myth about some deity or someone who wanted to invent a potion which could make people fall in love. They kind of succeeded, but actually later it turned out that the potion didn't create those feelings from scratch."

"What do you mean?" You had a feeling where this was going, but you needed a clear confirmation.

"In order for the potion to work, the person who drank it had to already have some feelings for someone. The potion just caused those feelings to grow abnormally stronger and made the drinker more emotional, confident and bold about their feelings. Umm, but why are you asking?"

You were flabbergasted. Could it be...? "Oh, it's nothing, I was just curious. Thanks Tang, I have to go now, bye!" After that you ended the call, not even letting the scholar say goodbye.

That meant that Sun Wukong, aka The Monkey King himself had a crush on YOU. A REAL CRUSH. SINCE WHEN?! How long was he hiding it? Either you were really dense and oblivious or he was really good at hiding his true feelings. Honestly, it was hard to determine which was true in that situation.

For a solid minute you just sat there with your mouth open. Your mind literally screamed "error". Then you suddenly squealed like a teenage girl, jumped in the air and said "YES!"

Well. It seemed like you needed to have a little chat with Wukong.

#the monkey king #lmk monkey king x reader #lmk sun wukong #lmk #lmk sun wukong x reader #lmk x reader #sun wukong x reader #sun wukong #monkey king x reader #lego monkie kid x reader #lego monkie kid #requests open

[archangeldyke-all]

So uhm ….how..how about sev with a corruption kink and .. 👉🏻👈🏻 a really really sweet girl who … gets reeled in by sev‘s magnetic personality and ends up just … u know … getting corrupted 👉🏻👈🏻

i'm completely chill and normal about this ask. (i'm lying) (i'm clawing at my walls and ripping my hair out)

men and minors dni

sevika never thought she'd be into inexperienced girls.

she didn't think she'd be patient enough for it. when sevika wants to fuck someone, she wants to fuck them. she doesn't wanna teach them how to fuck, she doesn't wanna wait to fuck, she just wants to fuck and move on.

but then she meets you.

she thinks you're the cutest fucking thing in the world.

you're sweet. you're the only person sevika knows who will always toss her a smile, even when she's scowling at everyone who comes in her line of vision. it gives her butterflies.

you're kind. when sevika's upset-- most people avoid her. you don't, though. you see right through the angry glare she wears to cover up her hurt. and you ask. you ask her if she's okay, if she wants to talk, if she'd like some company. and you actually listen to her answers.

the first few times she says no-- confused by the question and trying to figure out your angle.

but after a while she realizes you don't have an angle. you're just kind, eyes genuine as you look at her, a sympathetic little furrow between your brows. so she starts being honest. no, she's not okay, no she doesn't want to talk about it, but yes. she'd like your company.

and after the first few times of that, of the two of you just sitting in companionable silence, as you occasionally tell her a funny anecdote, doodling on a napkin beside her, she starts talking too.

you're funny. you make her laugh when she least expects it, little quiet quips only meant for her to hear that make her snort and smack her hand over her mouth in embarrassment. you've got this subtle snark that not everyone picks up on-- but sevika always notices and giggles when you're a bit sassy.

and it's all these reasons-- you're kind heart and sweet nature and sense of humor-- that sevika falls in love with you.

but it's your innocence that makes her fall in lust.

you're innocent. so, so innocent. as your friendship grows and you start opening up to sevika, she's shocked to find out that you (you, the girl she's been having wet dreams about every other night) are a virgin. that you've never even had a girlfriend-- that your last kiss was in the second grade when a slimy little boy held your favorite stuffie hostage until you pressed your lips against his.

she doesn't get it. she has a million fucking questions about it.

she finally snaps one evening, drunk and deadly curious.

"so then the guy tells me they're not sellin' chicken eggs anymore and i'm like what's wrong with chi--?"

"do you masturbate?" sevika blurts. you choke on your words.

"s-sorry!?" you ask with a laugh. sevika cringes and shrugs.

"well... do you?" she asks. you blink.

"i'm a virgin sevika, not a prude."

"so... yes?" she guesses. you laugh.

"yes." you say. something in sevika's stomach flutters. "don't you?" you ask. she nods.

"do you... think about sex when you do it?" she asks. you blink at her.

"well... yeah..." you say.

"am i making you uncomfortable?" she asks, suddenly worried. you giggle.

"i'd tell you to fuck off if you were. i just don't understand where all the questions are coming from." you say.

"i--" sevika cuts herself off. what's she supposed to say? i can't stop thinking about all the ways i could ruin you? that's what she wants to say, but she thinks that might be a bit strong. "i guess i just don't get how you haven't found someone yet."

you furrow your brow.

"well, it's not like women are fuckin' throwing themselves at me, sevika." you say.

"that's not--"

"i'm not an idiot, you know, i know what sex is. just 'cause not all of us aren't fuckin' walking sex magnets doesn't mean--"

"that's not what i meant!" sevika screeches out. her eyes are wide and panicked.

"well, what did you mean?"

"i meant that you're hot as fuck and i'm trying to figure out if you're a virgin 'cause you wanna be or if i'd have a shot at fuckin' you!"

it's quiet for a minute as you absorb sevika's words.

she massages her temples with her hand, mumbling to herself under her breath. you catch a few words. what the fuck is wrong with you? and this is why i don't drink clear liquor.

"you'd have a shot." you choke out eventually. sevika's head snaps up to look at you. "i-i mean--"

"what?" she cuts you off again. you shrug.

"if you wanted. but, you know, i can't-- we'd have to--"

"take it slow, yeah--"

"and i don't think i can do the whole casual th--"

"i'm in love with you." she says. a second passes, and then sevika's brain catches up to her. she smacks her head on the table with a groan. "what the fuck is wrong with me?"

"are you serious!?" you choke out. sevika huffs.

"yes. but i really didn't mean to say it. please pretend i didn't. or if it's too weird for you now--"

you burst into laughter.

sevika's known she wants to corrupt you, but she's vastly underestimated how much she'd get off on it.

like, she thinks she's more turned on than you are-- and you're always soaking wet around sevika.

even in the beginning, when she's trying her very best to keep it romantic and polite (kisses on your cheek every chance she can, a hand around your waist or shoulders almost always, sweet goodnight kisses at your door) the sweet way you flutter your eyelashes at her as you blink your eyes in surprise, the way you shyly smile at her-- it makes her cunt throb.

she spends every moment she can looking at you. half of the time it's in sweet admiration or amusement, the other half she's daydreaming about fucking you, her eyes wandering up and down your figure.

she lets you control the pace-- but she doesn't hesitate once you give her a go ahead.

so, after your third date --homemade pizza and a movie on sevika's couch-- when you shyly smiles up at her and ask if, maybe, she'd like to stay a little longer? she just has to scoop you up in her arms and carry you back to the couch, pressing her mouth to yours.

you were fumbling against her lips, gasping in surprise and trying to keep up with her pace-- but she intentionally kept you guessing-- absolutely adoring the gentle, inexperienced press of your mouth against hers and the little moans pleasure escaping your lips.

she won't pull away from your mouth, won't let you breathe for more than a moment before diving back in-- so you push her down to your neck, moaning when she starts nibbling and kissing the skin of your throat. she growls against you.

"fuck, can i give you a hickey?" she grunts, before returning to her gentle kisses and nips. you shudder.

"yes please." you whimper.

she groans as she bites into the flesh of your throat.

you whine.

sevika's got one hand on your jaw, one gently scratching up and down your back. you grip her arms, redirecting them so one hand can fondle your ass while the other can play with your tits.

sevika moans against your neck and bites you so hard you're certain she draws blood. she doesn't-- but it was a close thing.

(it's only years later that she shyly admits to you that she bit you so hard 'cause she was cumming in her pants.)

you become obsessed with her kisses. any moment you can, you're tugging her in for a kiss.

she loves it. loves teasing you about how needy you are. loves the way you'll pout-- she always kisses it away.

(also, she calls you needy, like she's not the one tracing circles into whatever patch of your skin she can reach and staring at your lips with a cocky smirk while you talk.)

you start losing track of your dates with sevika. you guys were already close friends-- seeing each other multiple times a week-- and now that you're in a relationship (which sevika loves reminding you of because she loves the half embarrassed half proud little smile it gets out of you) but now you're spending most of your free time together.

sometimes you go out, sometimes you stay in, sometimes you just go buy groceries together or meet at each other's apartments to take a nap.

but all that being said, it's about one month into your relationship when sevika first sees you naked.

you've seen sevika naked plenty of times before. she's not shy about her body, and she loves the way your eyes get all wide and glossy, the way your lips part, and your thighs clench when she's, 'just airdrying babe, it's better for your skin or something,' after her shower for thirty minutes.

so it's really satisfying when the roles are finally reversed, and sevika's left speechless as you straddle her lap, still clothed in her boxers.

it's satisfying until sevika's eyebrows furrow and she bites her lip.

your stomach drops.

you're just like anybody else-- you have your fair share of insecurities about your body. and this is the first time anyone besides your doctor or yourself has seen you naked. you give it a second, but when she doesn't move or speak, you start to panic.

"sevika?" you squeak out. her eyes snap up to look at you. she gulps.

"fuck." she gasps.

"uhh...?"

"i'm gonna say it again, shit!" she bites her lip.

"say wha--"

"i'minlovewithyou." she says all at once. you freeze. "you're so beautiful fuck i- i wanna tear you apart but-- fuck, no-- i mean i do but-- i'm in love with you. i wanna-- you've fuckin' ruined me! and now i wanna ruin you, you know?" she babbles. you giggle.

"i knew you had a kink for the whole virgin thing!" you say, pointing an accusing finger at her.

sevika clams up, her shoulders coming up to her ears and her face cringing. "i--"

you kiss her to silence her. she slowly relaxes, her hands coming up to grip your hips.

she guides your hips down, slowly grinding your wet pussy in circles against her thigh.

you pull away with a gasp, looking down at sevika's pretty blushing face, and you giggle. "i think it's cute, baby." you whisper against her lips. she huffs.

"it's not about the vi-virgin thing. it's about you. fuck. you're so good. and i wanna make you feel so good. and it's s-s-so fuckin' hot that you let me. and i-i..."

"you love me?" you guess. she nods.

you laugh, then press a gentle, sincere kiss to her lips.

"i love you too, sevika." you whisper.

she cums, her arms wrapping around, digging her fingers into your back and tugging you to her chest. "b-baby, shit!" she gasps against your throat. you giggle, and press kisses against her head as she shakes beneath you.

you're so horny afterwards that you beg her to make you cum. she flips you onto the bed, hovering over you, pressing kisses to your face, your breasts, your stomach.

"anything, baby, you want my mouth or--?"

"mouth!" you squeak. she chuckles.

"perfect fuckin' choice." she praises, before ripping your legs apart and pinning them to the bed.

she hovers above your pussy, her mouth six inches away from you, the hot puffs of her breath making your cunt clench.

"sevika--"

"just a second." she whispers, eyes glued to your cunt. you whine and shift your hips.

"sevika!"

"fuckin' hold on a second, baby, i'm tyrin' to take a mental pictu--mpph!" you pres her face down against your cunt, cutting her off.

she tries to glare up at you, but the second she gets a taste of you, her eyes are rolling in the back of her head and she moaning louder than you are.

she doesn't let go of her grip on your thighs-- she keeps you pinned as she alternates between sucking your clit and ducking down to lap at your leaking entrance, occasionally pushing against it and slipping the tip of her tongue in.

you're squealing, scrabbling at her hair and twitching in her hold-- stuttering out half words that get cut off by moans.

she chuckles against you and pulls away, her mouth and chin covered in spit and arousal, a grin on her lips. one of her hands trails up your thigh for her thumb to begin rubbing circles on your clit.

"tell me how you masturbate." she demands. you shiver.

"fuck--"

"do you use fingers? or do you just play with this pretty clit?" she purrs. you gasp.

"i-i-- both i guess?"

"mmm. how many fingers?"

"one m-maybe two if i'm really--"

"do you want one of mine?" she asks. you groan and nod, tugging on her scalp.

"please please please please--"

"fuck, but you're so tight, honey. you know i got big fingers. you think you can take it?" she asks, her lips brushing against your clit as her thumb travels down to trace your labia.

"for fuck's sake sevika--" you start. she giggles below you before shooting up, her hand still pressed against her cunt, but her lips now smashed against yours.

she pecks little kisses on your lips as she runs her pointer finger through your folds, gathering your dripping arousal and her spit, and then she thrusts her tongue into your mouth just as she eases her finger into you.

you moan. she really does have big fingers, and a much better angle than you're ever able to reach. she chuckles against your lips.

"you okay?" she asks as she slowly eases her finger back out. you nod against her.

you're sensitive-- it's so foreign feeling someone else inside you, so pleasurable, but so strange-- it doesn't take much for you to start shaking and clenching around her finger. she keeps a slow, steady pace, and you gasp. "oh fuck-- i'm gonna!"

sevika whimpers against you, ducking down to press a kiss to your nipple before squatting between your legs and sucking your clit into her mouth.

you both cum. sevika cums at the way your tight cunt clenches around her finger, and you cum and from gentle circles she's rubbing into your g-spot.

she's obsessed with fingering you.

anywhere, anytime, sevika will snatch your wrist and drag you into the nearest empty room, before shoving her hand down your pants and massaging your cunt, sinking one or two fingers inside when you're wet enough.

"s-s-sorry baby," she whimpers against you as you claw at her biceps, muffling your moans into her shoulder. "i'll make it fast-- you just look way too fuckin' good tonight." she grunts as she sinks a finger into your cunt.

she fucks you slow and gentle against the bathroom stall, both of you giggling when someone rattles the locked door.

"shhhit you feel so good, honey." she grunts. she's always all needy and whiny right up until you cum. then: she just lets her mouth run, saying all the nasty things she's thinking out loud to you.

you clench around her finger, clawing at her shoulder. "shit baby, i'm gonna--"

"fuck, baby i love this pussy. so fuckin' tight for me an' 's all mine. god i can't wait 'til you can take my cock. stuff you nice and full, stretch you out, get you squirtin' on my dick--"

you come with a loud moan.

(outside the bathroom, you hear a scandalized gasp. you both laugh as you quickly straighten up, sevika tucking you under her arm and sneaking you out of the cafe.)

it takes a while for you to get used to her big fingers but with how often she's touching you, it's not too long before you can comfortably take two, then three.

she takes it as slow as she can the first time she fucks you with the strap. she picks out her smallest, keeps the lube on the bed, tucks a pillow under your hips.

it still stings. not enough that you don't want it, not enough to outweigh the pleasure of sevika's thumb on your clit, but still enough for you to bite your lip and whimper, clawing at her abs as she inches inside of you.

"fuck, 's big!" you whimper.

sevika cums. obviously.

she tries to keep her hips steady, but the second the words leave your mouth she's thrusting the two or three remaining inches of her strap inside of you and collapsing on top of you.

the whines and whimpers you let out below her only make her cum harder.

the moment she catches her breath, she starts grinding small, apologetic circles against you where her cock is still buried to the hilt inside you.

"shit, shit, shit, take my cock baby, just like that. fuck." she whispers. you shudder beneath her, and she starts rocking her hips a little harder. "does it feel good, honey? do you like my dick?" she asks. you claw your nails into her back.

"sevika, sevika, shit, feels so good, fuck you're so deep--"

"i love you." she says, pulling away to gaze down at your body, fucking into you with fast little strokes. "look how well your tight little cunt is takin' me. 's so pretty, droolin' all over me. you've just been waitin' for the right cock, huh, baby? knew nobody'd be able to fuck you 's good as me, right?"

you're too busy moaning to answer any of her questions, but she doesn't seem to mind. she can tell by the way you're twitching beneath her that you're close.

"gonna cum?" she asks. you nod. "good girl." she grunts.

that's all it takes for you to cum, gasping and pulling sevika against your body as you shiver and moan through the most intense orgasm of your life.

sevika holds you through it, kissing your face and praising you gently. "so fuckin' good baby."

when you catch your breath and open your eyes again, you look up directly into the face of a cockily smirking sevika. you chuckle.

"pleased with yourself?"

"very." sevika says, grinning.

"'m not a virgin anymore. 's your mission accomplished?" you tease.

she bites her lip and looks down at you.

"i got a couple new missions in mind." she whispers. you laugh.

taglist!

@lesbeaniegreenie @fyeahnix @sapphicsgirl @half-of-a-gay @ellabslut @thesevi0lentdelights @sexysapphicshopowner

#sevika #sevika imagine #sevika arcane #sevika x reader #sevika x you #soft sevika #sevika smut

[just-jordie-things]

hello i'm not sure if you take requests i'm sorry If not 😭 but I really love your fics and I was wondering if you could do something like a long distance relationship with megumi? like reader is from kyoto jujutsu high and they met during that competition event, it can be hcs or whatever you like. Thank u in advance 💖

yes yes yes let's do some chunky hcs bc i never do them and they're fun _

when you first meet the tokyo students, you come across as shy. which isn't really who you are, but they'd just lost one of their friends, and you didn't think it was right to mess with them like mai and todo were. so you tucked yourself behind the rest of your classmates and kept your eyes glued to your phone

(when yuuji ends up being alive and you're told that the mission here is to kill the vessel by whatever means necessary, you still keep your eyes down, but you're anything but distracted)

you don't run into megumi directly. you run into a demon dog. at first you brandish your weapon, frowning at the idea of having to defend yourself against such a fluffy creature. but it seemed the dog wasn't focused on you, as if attacking you wasn't the command it had been given. as you approach it, your steps are calculated, slow, just to be sure it wasn't going to catch you off guard.

more peculiar, when you got close enough, and you lowered your weapon to your side, the big puppy sat itself on the ground. you actually laughed, before carefully placing your hand between it's ears for a little scratch. the divine dog seemed to smile as it panted and pushed it's head further into your pleasant scratching.

"i can't just sit here all day and pet you you know," you coo to the shikigami, but despite your words you crouch down to get a better look at it's detailed markings. "but a little break couldn't hurt, could it?" you ask with a bright smile.

the dog thumps it's tail against the ground a few times, displaying it's content with your attention. again, you giggle. if only you could've been born with a cursed technique that could bring you such companionship.

"you're such a good boy, aren't you?" you praise. "or girl? i'm sorry. I wonder if you have a name..."

you're not sure how much time had passed, but you know it's not smart to stay in one place for too long. you don't know what would be worse, your opponent finding you, or your own peers.

you figure you'd rather the curses unleashed in the area would be your best bet.

however just as you're about to go back to the task at hand, you're caught. or, found, really.

"what the hell are you doing?"

your weapon in hand again, you whirl around towards the voice, and you even step in front of the shikigami as though you were it's protector.

there stands one of the tokyo students, a sword in hand but it's lowered to his side, and the most perplexed face you've ever seen on anyone.

(it's kind of cute, actually)

"dogs are my weakness" you shrug with you honest answer to his question.

it's then that his eyes shift to you, and you realize he hadn't been talking to you, he'd been talking to the divine dog. you snort.

"so you're his owner?" you think out loud. "does he have a name?"

megumi blinks, bewildered by such a question. shouldn't you be attacking him right now? he supposes he should have used your distraction as an opening to get you out first, but he couldn't help but stop in his tracks when he caught you baby talking his shikigami.

whether that was because you were so pretty and he hadn't seen you before, or he was confused as to why his shikigami wasn't following simple orders, he wasn't sure. (it was definitely both tho)

"uh, totality" he answers, and he doesn't know why, it's not like you need an answer, it's not like he owes you an answer, but it comes out before he can stop himself.

you grin, and turn back to the dog- turning your back completely on your opponent- just to scratch behind his ears and coo again.

"totality," you repeat with a smile, and the shikigami's tail waves back and forth in wide swoops on the ground. "what a good boy, aren't you?"

no, megumi thinks bitterly, he's not a good boy because he was supposed to be taking out the kyoto students, yet here you were, playing with him.

"i'm (y/n)," you say, and megumi isn't sure if you're introducing yourself to him or the shikigami, because your focus remains completely on the latter. "you're megumi, right?"

he doesn't say anything, maybe because he's been at a loss for words since he's stumbled upon this little interaction, or maybe because he's suddenly feeling... shy?

"mai's told me about you," you explain, turning to look at him again. he still has his weapon at his side, and you smile at how unguarded he seems to be. so far, he doesn't seem anything at all like you classmate had explained.

(then again, mai had tried to convince everyone her sister was no threat, but you'd met maki, and you know to keep a distance because you'd like to keep all your teeth intact)

"did you do something to him? why isn't he attacking you?"

you shrug again, before turning to face your opponent once more.

"I dunno," you shrug. "maybe his master doesn't will him to attack me, so he hasn't," you smirk at the insinuation, and your pride only blooms when megumi visibly flusters. even from a few feet away, you can see the tips of his ears go red.

and the truth is megumi is flustered. incredibly so. here you were, a stranger, an opponent, cooing to his shikigami like it were a puppy you saw in a pet store window, and now you were smiling at him and you weren't even lifting your weapon. maybe he didn't want totality to get you out of the event? were you right to assume that?

now that he thinks about it, he hasn't exactly lifted his weapon either. but that's just cause he was shocked, right?

"well, since you're not getting me out, i'll do you a favor too," you say, and suddenly you're approaching him, rapidly so. every instinct tells him to tighten his grip on his weapon and brandish it before you could get too close, but somehow you stand before him and his sword remains at his side.

this is your cursed technique, right? you must be doing something to make him freeze in place, because this was completely out of the ordinary for him.

"itadori is in danger," your voice drops in volume, and it also loses the sweet, cursive melody you'd previously used when speaking to his shikigami like a pet. "the old man wants him dead. you need to make sure your team knows"

a million thoughts and questions race through his head, but megumi remains silent, his eyes wide as he stares at you, trying to decipher if you're even telling the truth. this could be a trap after all, maybe an ambush. you have no reason to show all your cards and confess this to him, after all.

but your features are serious, hardened with genuinity. and megumi realizes you have no reason to lie, either. he swallows a lump in his throat before he nods.

he's not sure why he trusts you, but he just feels like he should. in that moment, it feels like he's known you longer than the past three minutes, like it's been years, like you're his closest confidant and there wasn't a chance in the world you could deceive him.

you nod back at him, before a small smile creeps over your lips, letting yourself indulge in his pretty features before you step away with the intention of getting back to the event.

"you get one pass megumi, i still have a game to win" you tell him with a grin. "but i do hope I can see you again!"

lucky for him your back is turned as you head off into the trees, because the comment makes the rest of his face burn hot and he knows it would be obvious if you were looking his direction.

with you out of sight, he turns his attention towards totality.

"what the hell was that?" he mutters, and for a second, he actually would have appreciated an answer, because whatever your hold on him was, hadn't seemed like cursed energy at all.

i'm loving this i'm gonna make a part two to this in a bit :3

#fushiguro megumi #megumi x reader #megumi fushiguro x reader #megumi fushiguro #megumi #fushiguro #jjk x reader #jjk #jujutsu kaisen #jujutsu kaisen x reader

[viathecloset]

Taehyung and jungkook's relationship is overlooked by 90% of the fandom solely because they are so controlled by the narrative of the fandom/company that they cannot quite accept that anything outside is even a remote possibility. Ive been more of a quiet observer for years now [my sister's an army since 2015] and I've seen the boys, moreover I know how marketing and kpop works. It's quite evident if u observe close enough of the pattern on how this group of seven guys who genuinely love music is marketed you would understand to what extent you're being brainwashed. Im not talking about this like a conspiracy theorist. It's quite simple and right infront of you. Yall refuse to accept it that's all.

1. There are a certain set of stories that are made to be told by them, over and over again. Even if it disturbs them or they are bored. E.g: 2018 disbandment story, vmin dumpling incident, jikook rain fight/tokyo trip, mind you there are many things that happend between people who lived together for 10+ yrs but if it cuts the flow of events you are made to believe happened you aren't gonna hear from it, ever.

2. Like stories there are dynamics that each pair is supposed to portray Taegi as annoying/annoyed duo, taejin/jikook as flirty HS boyfriends, namseok/taekook the awkward old friends and no matter how much the relationships change or evolve you won't see it cuz again, it won't FIT the narrative that has already been shown.

3. Like relationships there are characteristics that thankfully some members chose to break out of during their solo era: hoseok always being sunshine and loud ( he's quite serious and very dedicated infact ), jungkook being that muscle dude who only knows how to follow his Hyungs ( he's very independent and has a lot of targets he wants to achieve individually, he's very thoughtful and organized) and Taehyung being WEIRD and weak ( he's extremely intelligent and super strong he's strategic and disciplined)

4. This brings us to the whole Taekook narrative, the fact that they've been seen so much during solo era yet people had the audacity to still call them distant and awkward solely cuz it wasn't via company but through Taehyung's ig or jungkook mentioning him in interviews etc. I think it's needless to say they aren't comfortable being touchy and showy on camera for content, hell if they were to shoot everytime Taehyung and jungkook hangout there would he enough CONTENT till 2067. They're supportive of eo and have a very big shared friend circle, when jungkook went missing for almost 2 months we got to know Taehyung was the one he was with.

5. The thing is everyone [ including my own sister ] thinks that Taehyung is being desperate or such whenever he mentions Taehyung cuz a. Yall have actually led jokers run so fucking rampant that everytime the man mentions him actually doing something you're ready to throw him under the bus and call him a liar or such. b. Im not saying jungkook isn't close to anyone else but when he isn't working or shooting content and just wants to be himself the one you saw him most was around Taehyung and yes it matters. In the name of hating shippers yall have not only dissed the quite frankly PRIVATE bond they seem to share but went as far as dissing Taehyung himself cuz of the extreme level of manipulation yall are under.

Ik imma find armys [jikookers ]under this sooner or later calling me names but to be honest I'm sick and tired of yall dissing very real people and their very real human relationships solely based off the content yall are made to believe is 100% candid. Go touch grass, get friends, go date, don't obsess over them for a while then come back and try seeing it from a neutral perspective.

#taekook #taehyung #jungkook #bts #tumbler #opinion #fandom ships

[ramne7]

First Meeting with Atsushi, Dazai, Chuuya and Ranpo (Part 1)

Soon: Kunikida, Akutagawa, and Ango (Part 2)

killing, explosion, stalking, mention of suicide, foul words, f!reader, fluff scenario

ngl you gotta be so fuckin' unlucky to meet them out of all the ppl u could've meet 💀

ps. this post and the next, next(2nd meeting) r connected obv, so some details will be kind of confusing

AtSUSHI

I'm walking up to one of the stores to buy something. I got in and picked up all the things I needed. There weren't a lot of people inside, but for some reason the moment I stepped inside I felt something is amiss and usually my gut feelings never gets wrong, so I'm confident that something is wrong and I've been trying to observe the surrounding—

“GET DOWN!” I shouted as loud as I can when I saw blinking in the upper corner of the store— just beside the CCTV camera and just like my hunch...

“AH!” A civilian screamed in shock. Something in that corner made an explosion, fortunately people who were left were already running out of the store before it exploded 1/3 of the store.

2 men came running towards the store, they introduced themselves as the Armed Detective Agency with their IDs. Though, to be honest I couldn't care less...

“Can you tell us what happened?” The boy with the er... unique? haircut asked.

“Boi, you have pretty uneven bangs”

“Oh? You thought so too” The boy wasn't offended but looks like he hears this on a daily basis. Though, I shouldn't have pointed that out.

“Oh, sorry I shouldn't have said that. Well, the CCTV camera is still working, it caught exactly what happened, it'd be better to ask the footage instead” They seemed confused.

“I made sure it wouldn't be damaged during the explosion, so that I wouldn't need to be interviewed” They said their appreciations and I said my goodbyes before going out.

OsaMUAH (DUHzai)

“Tell me... What do you know about that guy you're staring at?”

“Fuckin- Can you not talk to strangers such as me??” I got jumpscared by a guy who looked like a mummy... But hot though— priorities, anyways he's been following the guy who I have also been following, since he's the guy in my mission.

“You're with Ango aren't you” He wasn't even asking, that's a statement.

“And you're with ADA” I sighed my most tired one as this one seemed to be the most troublesome according to all the things I've heard about his glorious reputation before and after him joining the peaceful side.

“Look, you're prolly in a mission too about that guy, but my mission here is to gather informations about him, since he's one of our suspect so...” I observed his facial expression and ngl I enjoyed it more than I should've have.

“If you can exchange infos with me, I can let go of that guy for today and forget you ever followed that guy” I assumed he's also on a private matter with that guy and it seemed to be an important one considering it's only him investigating this.

“Hmm~” He gestured a thinking position. He looked at me again after 2 seconds.

“Commit a double suicide with me then it's a deal” Can I punch his pretty face?

“You can die alone” I retorted.

“Such harsh words from someone who's been enjoying herself while looking at my pretty face” I raised my eyebrow and made a disgusted face as a first response to that truthful claim.

“Fine” Was my second response.

ChūyUH

I walked in the elevator and pressed a floor. The elevator opened and I proceeded to go to our agency. Just as I was halfway of opening the door Kunikida spoke;

“Good morning, Y/N. Good timing I have work for you” I gave him my 'really?' face.

“It's not so 'good' morning anymore” I sighed before approaching Ranpo with his requested snacks, Ranpo hugged the paper bag full of calories.

“C'mon, it's just an errand, no serious cases” Supposedly easy tasks are always the dangerous ones and Atsushi can vouch me on that one.

“Yeah, sure” I strolled my way out off the building and walked my way to the location.

I'm supposed to meet a double agent who'll be delivering an important envelope to the agency by the request of the Special Division.

An 'errand' so to say.

I spotted a guy that matches the too detailed description of the double agent, so I started approaching him before a bullet head shot him. I wandered my eyes to locate the culprit and spotted the mafioso.

“Why kill him?” I asked since that guy wasn't even in the Port Mafia.

“Well, it was a request offered with a great sum of reward. Sorry to take your double agent” The last sentence was said sarcastically. He approached the now dead guy and tried looking for something.

“Looking for this?” I smirked while raising my hand with the envelope.

“How—” He tried to get it from me when I suddenly burned the envelope.

“Too bad, it's on Kunikida's table now” I can teleport any matter that I'm currently touching to places I've been.

“You could've saved that double agent if you wanted to, why didn't you?” He asked annoyingly.

“It wasn't in my task”

RUNpo

I spotted the crime scene I'm assigned with. I also spotted the infamous member of ADA. I walked my way closer to the detective.

“I'm from the Special Division, Y/N. I'm only here to collect a certain evidence” He's circling around the dead body like he's looking for something on the body.

“This case is under our agency. You'll have to wait until I close this case” He replied. I sighed mentally as I was hoping to finish this task as quickly as i can.

I waited at a nearby café, since I'm not about to stand under the burning sun for a long period of time.

8 minutes later I ate some of my words.

“You're already done??” I asked the agent who's now in front of me.

“Yeah. Is this the evidence you needed” He handed me the victim's phone.

“Thanks? How'd you know?”

“Buy me those cookies first” I was informed of his obsession to sweets and his amazing deduction skills, but I wasn't expecting him to solve it in less than 10 minutes.

He hugged the paper bag full of sweet pastries.

“You're under the Special Division-Tech. The victim had no other useful belonging with her in the crime scene other than her phone and wallet, you're not wearing any gloves and you chose to not watch over the crime scene in case the evidences get touched or go missing, so you're not here to collect any DNA nor did you need the contents inside the wallet. The phone gave away your position as a tech” He explained before walking away.

#bungo stray dogs #bungou stray dogs #ranpo edogawa #chuya nakahara #ryunosuke akutagawa #doppo kunikida #bsd x reader #fluff #bsd fluff #dazai x reader #ranpo x reader #atsushi x reader #kunikida x reader #Akutagawa x reader #ango x reader #chuuya x reader #rumnhie's work #chuya x reader #anime #anime fluff #osamu dazai #ango sakaguchi #atsushi nakajima #chuuya nakahara #scenario #f!reader

[g-xix]

will ALWAYS stand for danny aarons slander. guy plays fifa all day and cba to take care of a dog? and says wallahi when he doesn’t mean it??

HONESTLY. Danny's acc litr a microcosm for the entire population of 12 y/o boys' mentality. Him n Tennessee's thing, throwing his ex under the bus, that REALLY set me off initially, and now this is j so bad too...

Cuz like, i love this trope of YouTubers who are in relationships and are pretty certain they wanna stay together, but aren't ready to have kids yet - so their next stage of commitment is getting a dog.

Obvi, that's not related to Danny bc Danny got Silas (dog) b4 getting w Tennessee. But there's j such a cuteness about YouTubers who love their pets n allat. I mean, Simon n Mushu literally have me mentally smiling at my screen when i see those miniminter stories of them together.

But Danny's acc so foul for being down to even joke abt putting a dog down icl - i was mortified ab the thought of putting a guinea pig down last summer when it came to it - but the fact bro's so chill w talking ab that w a dog? Especially when it's 15k to do repairs, as if that's gonna ruin his life? If he's able to retire his dad, I don't think fixing his mum's garden will make his pockets hurt that much :/

That felt very judgemental. tbf, gotta acknowledge that he is ultimately the one who knows what's best for that dog, n it did sound like he was joking ab putting Silas down... So as long as that dog stays alive and in a loving home i suppose i can't complain as a viewer that isn't all that bothered if we're honest.

BUT THE WALLAHI THING.

Right, i saw a comment on that last post of some1 saying that Danny said Wallahi and then lied to Tennessee ab something? That's fucking vile. Just because bro's not part of a religion doesn't mean u can just disrespect integral parts of their teachings???? I mean shit, if you're not a part of the religion, why are you even involving yourself in it so much, especially trying to use it as a funny bit?

Might be a bit snowflake-y from me but I'm not Muslim myself, i j find his usage of the religion rly weird since it feels like he's using it for jokes and content, which realistically isn't what a religion is meant for 😀

#WAFFLE!! #danny aarons #tennessee thresh #tennessee thresher

[mrs-monaghan]

Honestly, at this point, I am so sick of defending Jikook's bond. JM has been purposely alluding when it comes to JK and I understand. I respect it, but by now he knows haters are hanging on his every word to discredit Jikook and he keeps handing them ammo & seems to be purposely doing it. Just like he has purposely excluded JK working on Letter and has just made it about Army, which has resulted in people also dismissing JK's involvement. That probably doesn't feel too good for JK, but I'm sure he respects JM's decision. If JK has another collab coming up with a member, you best believe they will talk about it and Letter will be forgotten, esp JK on it, cause its the way JM wants it. I actually feel a little bit bad for JK. He has really been putting himself out there & in a really eyebrow raising gay way toward JM and showing how much he loves him and JM comes in and knocks down everything JK has been putting out. I guess his way of damage control to tone the gay down. If he wasn't worried, he would have already mentioned JK's involvement with Letter normally. I just hope it doesn't make JK retreat, cause he did for a while. Now he's just been so open and free and I can see him pulling back, if JM keeps downplaying, cause all it does is make it look one sided from JK's end. I actually feel sorry for them, but JM really said you people aren't getting anything from me. I will giggle and blush about JK, but that's it.

I was ready with a different answer for you until I saw that you do understand what's going on and are just frustrated by it. Which is perfectly okay.

I guess it's his way of damage control to tone the gay down.

We have talked endlessly about how Jimin follows the rules, listens and does what is expected of him. Meanwhile JK don't give a shit and will do what he wants to do when he wants to do it.

I wouldn't be surprised if they're not even supposed to comment under each other's lives or mention each other. So what does JK do? Mention Jimin from start to end.

Yeah sure, it can be frustrating, but let it be frustrating because you want them to be them. To do them. To stop holding back. Don't be frustrated because you're tired of defending the relationship. You really don't have to. Just let the antis continue to anti. You know what you know, you've seen what you've seen.

What do you think would happen if Jimin does what JK does? I'm sure you've seen the JK hate from Jimin solos. But imagine how much worse that would be if it was Jimin doing what JK does. Yes, you as a Jikooker would be fed but guess what? Now, you'd be defending Jimin! AND you would still be defending their relationship.

We have a mountain of evidence that proves these 2 motherfuckers are in a relationship and still like you said, people have to defend their relationship. Do you honestly think if Jimin was as honest and open and forward as JK that everything would be solved? That antis would believe and tkkrs and jjks would stop attacking us and Jikook?

If your answer to this question is "no" then this ask is moot my dear.

As long as you know Jikook is real. As long as you know Jikook are couple. As long you continue to support and be happy for them. That is all that matters. No what haters think.

Haters will hate no matter what Jimin does or doesn't do. You need to make peace with that so that it can affect you less. And please remember u don't have to defend their relationship. Let whoever wants to talk, talk.

Jimin is incredibly smart and he says what he says when he needs to say it and is very strategic about it. He didn't have to answer the ramen question. He could have ignored it, easy. Yet he didn't, why? Any questions members reply to are a choice. Idk how good you are at reading body language or human behaviour but I'll just quietly leave this here and go have my lunch.

Tweet

#jikook is real #if jikook isn't real then neither am i #ask shaz #bts ask #jikook #bts #jimin and jungkook #jimin #kookmin #minkook #park jimin #jeon jungkook

[pebblysand]

HERE WE GO! WELCOME TO THE PAGE PALS PROJECT! THIS IS YOUR CONVERSATION STARTER FOR CHAPTER ONE. FEEL FREE TO SEND IN ASKS OR JOIN THE DISCORD FOR MORE!

HANDY LINKS/INFO:

chapter: i. out of sand (baby girl)

wordcount: 10, 157

playlist: notes here

castles FAQ: here

g e n e r a l t h o u g h t s:

I felt very emotional, beginning this chapter. There is a sense of finality in this project that I hadn't quite grasped before. This is - in all probability - the last time I read this fic. This is the last time I read this chapter. A chapter I have read dozens of times in the past few years - every time I was stuck, every time I needed to 'get back in.' Most of these paragraphs roll off the tip of my tongue when I read them out loud, because I've seen them so many times. And, I know that for you, reading this, this might not be the last time. Because you will go back, re-read this fic as many times as you like for as long as the internet exists. But I won't. That's not how my brain works, and I need to put projects behind me. To make room for new ones. And, so there is a sense of excitement, yes, reaching the end, but also a sense of grief.

If everything goes well, and if I do post the last chapter when I intend to, castles will have been four years of my life, almost to the day. COVID came and went, so did a couple of jobs, a relationship, a parent. I recently listened to an interview from Alexandre Astier where he described meeting someone in a supermarket once, who asked for an autograph for her husband. 'Ah, he's a massive fan,' she said. 'Though, to be honest, I never got into your work myself.' He was talking about how, for 'normal' people, people who aren't artists, someone else's art is just that: something that you like or don't like. But, for us, it's a part of ourselves. It's thousands of hours of work. And, sometimes, I wonder what castles says about me. What these thousands of hours have come down to. If I die tomorrow, which I hope I do not, this is one the things that I will leave behind me. And, so: what does it say about me? I mean: beyond the politics and the feminism and the quirky little interests. I mean: me, as a person. What do castles readers know about me? I'm not sure I even want to know.

t h e r e - r e a d:

I really enjoyed re-reading this chapter. It's funny to me how for you guys, depending on when you started the fic, you might have read multiple versions of this. I didn't make any big changes, nothing massive, but I did add a couple of scenes/lines here and there throughout the years, I'm curious to see whether you will notice.

in terms of the chapter itself, i think one of the things i like most about it is how it flows. it has that very distinctive castles prose to it, with the timeline that moves back and forth, the run-on sentences, the spiralling in and out of scenes. i recently got a comment on ff.net (lol) that said the chapter was messy and unreadable. and i think in a way, i like that. because frankly, if that bothers you in chapter 1, then you're probably not the right person for this fic, you know? i think chapter one serves its function well. a first chapter is supposed to be an intro, a taste of what you will read next, and i think it is perfect in that. it introduces the plot, the dynamic between the characters. it's long enough to signal that this isn't a fic where you'll read fifteen chapters in half an hour. i think you can read chapter one and tell if this is a fic you'll enjoy or not. and, that's what i want, really. that's what a first chapter should do.

having said that, i think there are two things i want to specifically dive into.

t h e h y p o:

early in the writing of castles, i used to get a lot of criticism about my version of post-war harry and ginny. particularly, there seems to be a subsection of the hinny-shipping crowd that basically thinks that harry and ginny would just meet after the war, scream at each other (or, that at least, ginny would be angry at harry for leaving her behind), kiss and make up, and pour their hearts out to each other about past events. specifically, these people believe that ginny is very good at weeding secrets out of harry, at getting him to talk, and thus the events of castles are not canon compliant with both of these characters.

i feel like objectively, it's not really my place to say whether that's correct. i think multiple versions of the same thing can be 'correct' depending on how you write them. but, if that's what floats your boat, if you have a very strong headcanon about this, then fine - by all means, go read something else (again, that's also the point of chapter 1). but i think this hypothesis sort of stuck in my head for a while, in light of the comments i was getting, because i couldn't help but wonder if that version of things isn't simply an idealised version of reality.

because, to read the books strictly: 1) ginny's anger at harry isn't obvious. you could argue it is there but she's actually quite calm in the break up scene. i am not sure she is that angry with him, especially when you think that she's just been through a war, lost a brother, etc. i think ginny is someone who knows there is a time and place for anger, and who is also incredibly strong and resilient. she still kisses him even after the break-up, after he's clearly decided to leave her behind , so i'm not sure she would lash out in these circumstances. additionally, 2) there's actually not that much evidence that harry and ginny talk to each other - ever. they're a hot and heavy thing, but they don't share much emotional stuff on screen. you can interpret the 'sunlit days' however you want, in the absence of further information, but it's not a given that ginny ever shares anything of importance about her past or her traumas, like what happened with tom. the one scene everyone always points to is the 'lucky you' scene, but that's a mutual understanding more than it is a conversation. she actually never mentions anything beyond very utilitarian details meant to help harry realise he's not being possessed. and, harry never canonically tells ginny about anything of importance in his life either.

and so what all of these comments drove me to do, a few months ago (i think i added this in september 2023) was to link that to the theme of those early chapters of castles. because one of the key elements of chapters 1-3, specifically, is this idea of the lifeline. of the way harry and ginny have spent months, at this point, idealising each other, idealising their reunion, for it to later come crashing down on them. and so i thought i would use the opportunity of chapter one to 1) try and address the 'criticism' above, and 2) make it fit within the world of castles. it led to this:

In his head, their reunion would have been something sweet, like her lips moving against his, the taste of the raspberry-flavoured lip balm she used to wear the year before. He would have confessed to all of his sins, to almost dying, to Hallows and Horcruxes, to the fear and the nightmares, to leaving her behind. ‘I’m sorry,’ he would have said. ‘I am so, so sorry.’  And, he would have tried to explain like he did last year, that all he ever wanted was to protect her, to keep her safe, and she would have yelled. Shouted at the top of her lungs in a rapid succession of angry jabs about what an arsehole he was. ‘I can take care of myself!’ she would have thrown back. ‘You left me!’  He would have looked to his feet. With time, he hopes that they would have fixed it. In reality, though, Ginny Weasley hands him a toothbrush that morning, as he sits back on his heels. Her stare digs holes into the side of his face and he wonders if, had he been Hermione or Luna (had he been a friend, still), she would have cajoled him. Handed him a wet towel for his forehead. Instead, she closes the door behind her on her way out. ‘You should shower,’ she says.

i love the sort of whiplash effect this scenes gives, of the fantasy v. post-war reality, which is obviously a massive theme in castles. and i also love the way it subtly signals that ginny might have changed (just like he has) throughout the war. because, obviously, she has, and we later find out why.

s e x a n d f u n e r a l s:

i cannot express how attached i am to that scene, and to that line in particular. i think there's a number of reasons for this:

first, it's the line that basically motivated me to start castles for real in 2020. i have said this before in other posts but i started drafting some sort of post-war hinny fic as early as 2007. i never finished anything, then when i was 17 (2010), i did a re-read and actually drafted something new. then dropped it again. and, that file transferred from laptop to laptop, from file to file for ten years without me touching it much. until covid came and i was looking through my drive, and i tenderly read what 17-year-old me had written back then, including this 'first time' sex scene which, to be honest, has mostly remained untouched in the final version of this. and, i remember finding it, reading it, and thinking the rest of what i had written was a bit cringe, but that one scene seemed to work. and then, i got to the (now famous) line: to him, the spring of '98 is about sex and funerals, and thought fuck, that's a good line. like, a really good line. and i didn't want to let it go to waste. and, so, four years later, here we are.

i think that line is a very good symbol of what this story is about. 'sex and funerals' - it's a metaphor for how life is about the good and the bad things. that they co-exist as one single entity, and that the beauty of what we do, of the way we live, resides somewhere in between. it's why i chose it as the summary back then, and why it is still the summary now. i really built the entire fic around that line. so, yeah, 17-year-old jo, you already had something going for you, darling.

l a s t l y:

a thought i had while re-reading (and please don't come at me for this), is that... this could have been a one-shot. like, it really could have. i finished chapter 1 and there's a sort of finality to it, isn't there? like, i'm glad i continued this fic, but part of me thinks that all i've been trying to say in the past four years actually is in this chapter. obviously, not as detailed or subtle, but it's there, you know? it could have been a one-shot, lmao.

but anyway, i'm curious, did you guys enjoy your re-read? did you notice the changes i made throughout the years? did you enjoy them? feel free to send me an ask or join the discord server to discuss. i'm so excited to get this discussion started and hear your thoughts!

#castles #chapter 1 #and so it begins

[onejellyfishplease]

I am all about constructive criticism. I mean, how am I supposed to get better at writing/drawing if people won't be honest with me and give me tips to get better. I personally think that people who can't take constructive criticism aren't very bright. How are they supposed to get better at things if they don't listen to others who are just trying to guide them?

Also, I would love some more tips on how to make the shell better. If you are willing, of course. :)

I am horrible at drawing. I usually have to trace things to get a decent drawing. (For instance, I traced like five different things to make Mikey a pony.)

I'm so much better at coloring than I am at drawing. My writing needs work, too, but I'm getting better.

First of all, can I just say that you shouldnt worry about tracing art to improve your own (as long as u aren't posting it as soley your own but thats a whole other rabbit hole) I did too! It helps build ground work for a good understanding of anatomy and poses.

However there are a few holes in tracing. Forst of all it is quite limiting in the outcome of your work, as your art is stuck static in one pose. this can alkost hinder your ability to see things in '3D' and visualise objects for multiple angles. it can also lead to 'skin wrapping' , which i think is the hole you fell into here (and also a term i just made up now)

with the shell, you only coloured it within Mikey's trace lines - this caused the shell to loose a lot of its mass - making it look, quite frankly, not like a shell.

a way to improve on this is to look at more references of Mikey's shell in the show and its shape from different angles. this can help you get a good idea of how it should look, and it is a good idea to practice drawing it from these angles. this will improve your ability to think in a 3D space, (which is so darn hard, but seriously useful)

however, and you may have noticed this yourself, when you add new additions to the figure, the line art just doesnt line up! the line quality is different!

This is because the line you have done for the addition is Your Line. And we love your line.

so lets make the rest of the traced lineart fit into your style, instead of you fitting yours into theirs okay?

You may notice that when you trace art, the line work is just not the same, the lines are shakier than the original and it just doesn't look as good. this is not a reflection of your skill.

It is because, usually, (at least when I did it) you follow the original line so closely that it turns out shaky, probably taking your pen off the page a few times to take a break from the oen stroke. while the original artist did that line in one sweeping stroke.

a way to fix this, and make the line arr cleaner and more you, is to instead use the drawing as a very close reference. for example:

instead of tracing the exact lines of the art, merely trace the general shapes of the art. not only then do you add your own flair and gesture to the drawing, you are then more free to add more shapes to this sketch.

You can still use the reference drawing as closly as you want, but try to focus less on getting the exact lines copied, and more on the general shape. you linework wont be perfect the first time, it might be really messy compared to your usual tracing, and thats fine! you should see some of my sketches before i refine them!

But these will be your lines, theyll be smoother and more gestural, and overtime you will get better control over your penstrokes doing this.

Okay I cant really think of anymore to add here, I hope this helps! i think this was just one big word vomit lol. Keep drawing!! cause no matter what you do, as long as you are actively drawing you are always improving! dont be afraid to push yourself out of you comfort zone! who cares if it doesnt turn out the way you wanted it to? Its your art, You Created That with your Own Hands, and I think that is amazing.

<3

#asks #animal-lover-forever #i really hope this helped #its always hard for me to articulate my thoughts like this lol #YOU ARE GETTING BETTER #YOU ARE ALWAYS GETTING BETTER #art help #i hope #rottmnt #rottmnt mikey #mlp

[heich0e]

KENMA bc I been thinkin about him a lot lately!!!!!

u got it ley

18+ MINORS AND AGELESS BLOGS DO NOT INTERACT tags: fingering, exhibitionism, public sex, sugar daddy kenma, daddy kink word count: 511

"You're being noisy."

Kenma's right and you know it, but in your own defence it's entirely his fault.

Your hands grapple against the wallpaper in front of your face uselessly, your freshly painted nails leaving little red tracks of polish in their wake as you scrape them against the paper. The marks aren't particularly noticeable, the fine lines of crimson lost in the sumptuous swirl of the floral pattern: you can only see it because your face is so close, your cheek pressed against the wall of the expensive boutique's fitting room as Kenma crooks his fingers inside of you cruelly, your arousal dripping all the way down to his wrist.

You whimper again.

"It's almost like you want to get caught, you know."

You don't.

You aren't even sure how you ended up like this, if you were being honest. This was supposed to be an unremarkable afternoon shopping trip to find Kenma something to wear to a formal event he had coming up, but it had somehow devolved into this: being fucked open by Kenma's unfairly agile fingers in the dressing room of a store you couldn't dream of being able to afford to shop at yourself, wearing a dress more expensive than a month's worth of your own salary--though presently it's rucked up around your waist, Kenma pinning it up with the hand not busy between your twitching thighs.

'I'll buy it for you,' Kenma had said, only a few minutes earlier, sprawled across the chaise in the centre of the fitting room area while you examined the garment the salesperson had just presented you with. You'd looked at Kenma curiously when it was handed to you, only to find him smirking from his seat. You'd made every attempt to decline the offer, but he was insistent--a thank you, he'd said, for accompanying him out for the day. The dress was beautiful, finer than any you'd ever hoped to own, and he'd clearly seen you eying it wistfully as the two of you had been perusing around the shop. As though sensing your imminent agreement, he tacked on a single stipulation to the deal: 'But only if you try it on for me.'

"Is that what you want?" Kenma rasps, referencing his earlier accusation and pressing a little closer so he's whispering in your ear. "Do you want that nice attendant who picked this pretty dress out for you to see you in here like this?"

You shake your head weakly, tears prickling in your eyes. You're so close to coming undone that you can taste it, can feel the knot that's pulled unbearably taught in your tummy. Your hips rut back unconsciously against Kenma's hand, and he chuckles--his breath ghosting hot against the shell of your flushing ear. His pace endures: still infuriatingly slow and measured, never changing.

"Then what do you want?"

"Wanna cum," you say, the words strained and weak as you fight to choke back the moan you feel sitting in the back of your too-tight throat.

Kenma chuckles as he presses a fleeting kiss to the curve of your shoulder, his nose brushing softly along your throat as his lips trail back up to your ear.

"You know that's now how this works."

You tremble. At his nearness, at the thought of being caught, at the way you can hear how wet you are as Kenma forces a third finger inside of you to stuff you full, and at his words.

"Please,--" you whimper, your head dropping so your forehead rests against the fittingroom wall, the floral pattern swimming as tears pool in your eyes, "--can I cum, Daddy?"

#kenma x you #kenma x reader #kenma smut #kozume kenma #hq writing #writing #liv got mail #hq drabble

[tellthemeerkatsitsfine]

I listened to Elis James and John Robins on the Comedian’s Comedian podcast, as I somewhat recently passed the point in their radio show when they recorded it. It was a really good episode, even by the standards of that podcast, which are high. Very little messing around with basic explanations of stuff that we could find on their Wikipedia pages anyway, they jump straight in with analysis.

I cut out a few clips as I was listening. I meant to write a paragraph or so about each of them. I am coming back here after finishing the post to say I ended up writing a lot more than that. This one gets out of hand. It mainly stays on the topic of the podcast episode and the radio show, occasionally veers off into some personal stories of my own, makes tenuous connections between the two. That's what's below the cut that I'm adding because not everyone needs to be subjected to that.

I particularly liked this one, from the very beginning:

First of all, Elis James definitely has met another person who will start a radio episode by sighing and just saying whatever's actually in their mind instead of trying for slick broadcasting. Elis knows him very well, the mother of his children is frequently recording lines to put in that other broadcaster's shows. However, there is the key difference that Daniel Kitson's doing that on an obscure radio station (well, two obscure radio stations as he used to do Triple R in Melbourne, but hasn't for a long time, so I mainly mean Resonance FM in London) that doesn't pay him any money, while John Robins is doing it on a commercial radio station that was presumably a significant source of his income and is definitely the main source of his career success. It's definitely more a risk to try in that context.

Anyway, I'd like to put the above clip next to this one:

I'm now three years into following this radio show/listening to various podcasts and other things they've done alongside it, trying to go mostly in chronological order, and I would say they do this in one form or another approximately every six months. Just explicitly state the status dynamic between them, which is that Elis is more successful but John is funnier, this creates a couple of sources of mild tension that can be funny to listen to and give them something to play into as a double act, but it also balances out enough so their entire relationship isn't going to implode like Jon Richardson and Russell Howard. It's always a bit weird when they actually say that out loud, comedians aren't really supposed to tell us what level of status they've decided to assign themselves/each other for any given moment.

Elis James frequently says John Robins is a better comedian than him, which also a bit weird because it's the sort of thing you'd say as a joke, but he never sounds like he's joking, and it's... I mean, I was going to say it's objectively true, I guess it can't be given how subjective comedy is, but it is pretty clear cut. And it seems to genuinely not bother Elis James, which I used to think was odd, but I guess it makes sense. I've been teammates with people whom I know are better athletes than me, and we can still be friends, and if anyone asks who's better I can be honest about that. It sure would make that easier if I also somehow won more medals than they did (to continue the somewhat stretched analogy of Elis James having more TV work so that balances the scales), though sports tend to be more of a meritocracy than arts so that doesn't really happen.

There's also truth in the thing John said about how one of them has to come up with content for the radio show - they're on the same official footing, co-hosts rather than calling anyone a sidekick or whatever, but the vast majority of the funniest stuff gets said by John, and more than that, John drives most of the discussions. He usually comes in with more features and stuff prepared, he establishes a lot of the running jokes and keeps them going, he's the one who will lead most of their offshoots into weird little sketches and characters. His timing is incredible sometimes, every once in a while he'll have an episode where he's got Lee Mack levels of being able to jump on everything that gets said almost immediately and be funny every time. He seems like he can decide, pretty much based on how he's feeling at the moment but possibly also based on a sense for how much potential something has, whether to wrap up a thread in one incisive sentence or to draw it out. And it's almost always John making that decision (if it isn't the producer telling them to get on with it, that is, but it's rarely Elis' decision). Sometimes I can hear John work out the comedic potential in something they're talking about before Elis does, and Elis will start to move on but John will bring it back and guide him toward it, and eventually manage to push Elis into whatever joke John had figure out would be funny but only if Elis said it.

Having said that, and this is a tangent but discussing whether Elis James is funny just made me think of it, I've been wanting to give him credit for something. At some episode sometime in 2016, Elis James was telling a story about someone he admired, and the story was about something fairly serious, and at the end of it, John asked "Is he a laugh?", which was quite a funny thing to say in the context, it's annoying me that I can't remember the exact story but it was something like that. And it was funny to hear John be so efficiently dismissive of the sort of weird story. But later in the episode, John told one of his stories about one of those vaguely depressing things he does, like obsessively do his taxes four months in advance or drink rum alone at 2 AM and get sad while watching Queen documentaries - one of those types of stories - and at the end of it, Elis asked "Are you a laugh?" And after that, for several months, Elis James brought that back the exactly perfect number of times. I don't know how he did it, how he got it so perfect every time. He didn't drop it for long enough for regular listeners to forget that he'd made this a running joke, so it would lose its power as a callback. But he didn't say it often enough for it to start to get overused and less funny (not that those guys would ever try to milk more from one bit than it should be expected to bear... but of course we're all on email). There is such a small sweet spot, such little room for error in the frequency with which you can bring back a joke and not fall into either of those traps, and he got it perfect every time. Every time he'd said it, I'd have a moment of surprise because he'd left it just barely past the point at which it had been long enough since I'd heard it for it to get really funny again, and every time, I'd take a moment to admire his timing. He kept it going for quite a while, occasionally responding to John's depressing anecdotes from his own life with "Are you a laugh?" So, well done to Elis James, he can be funny too. Also, I mean, obviously he is regularly quite funny on the radio show, just not as funny as John Robins. It's fine, most people aren't as funny as John Robins. I'm not as good at underhook setups as my friend I hung out with the other night, but it's fine, we manage to get on with our lives.

Anyway, that was only very tenuously related to the topic of this post, let me see if I can find my way back. John Robins and Elis James having an odd balance of tensions created by John being funnier but Elis being more successful. I'm not sure that's as true now as it was in early 2014 to early 2017, which covers the period of radio episodes I've heard so far. At that time, Elis had recently had major roles in two sitcoms (Crims and Josh). He'd had one Welsh-language stand-up special released on the BBC and I think was working on recording another one. He'd done some panel show spots, more than John I think. I think he's started on his BBC television travel show with Miles Jupp. He'd gone to Europe to do TV and radio things about the Welsh football team. John Robins, meanwhile, had released the audio from a couple of his stand-up shows himself on Bandcamp, had been on Mock the Week twice and one of those times was a fucking disaster, a couple appearances on As Yet Untitled, and I think he occasionally got on things like The News Quiz but less often than Elis James did. I think he had a pretty good stand-up career going by then, but it hadn't really translated to other stuff. And John complained at times that he didn't get as many reviews and publicity as his stand-up profile deserved, though it's hard to tell if that's true or just his bias. He had a job for a while doing TV warm-up gigs, but then he got fired for what sounds like a combination of drinking too much and being too harsh for the "keep it light" atmosphere. The disparity between his profile and Elis' was probably for two main reasons: 1) Elis has the significant USP of being one of the only comedians who's fluent in the Welsh language so that gets him some stuff, and 2) the reasons outlined in that second audio clip about John having pissed everyone off.

I think their positions are different these days, though. I'm into the March 2017 episodes right now, in a few months John Robins is going to win a Perrier Award, so he can't keep complaining about not having a significant enough stand-up profile after that. That turned into a Netflix special, a significantly bigger deal than Elis' Welsh-language BBC iPlayer special. And then in 2018 he hosts a panel show, which I have downloaded but haven't watched yet, I'll wait until I get there chronologically. To be honest I'm slightly dreading getting there because I have a feeling it might be terrible. I don't think it was hugely successful because I'd never heard of it before I started looking up John Robins things this year, and I went really deep down the panel show rabbit hole in the last few years, I watched some quite obscure ones but never came across this. It also only lasted one season. But still, he hosted a panel show on Dave. That's a TV career.

And now, obviously, he's on Taskmaster. And seems to be playing large rooms in his latest stand-up tour. A tour that I'd assumed would get filmed for another TV special, though he's mentioned recently that he's planning to put it on Bandcamp like his earlier shows, and I do appreciate him keeping it real for us despite now being a Taskmaster star with a huge tour (as much as this shouldn't make sense because there can be visual humour in stand-up, I tend to prefer audio-only stand-up that's usually closer to how it actually sounded in the room, over filmed versions that get more edits). On the other hand, Elis had a TV series about Welsh comedy a few years ago. A podcast with some football players. I've just looked it up and apparently he hosts a football-based TV show on Sky, so that's nice. But the gap in TV-based success has probably closed.

But that discussion they had in that second audio clip - about John Robins not getting stuff because he's (rightly and justifiably) reaping the consequences of being a dick with a substance abuse problem, and Elis James valiantly taking on the role of Robins Apologist - that really nails, for me, what I enjoy so much about their dynamic. I think that my favourite dynamic. I fucking love anywhere where two people get that one going. That dynamic that's summed up by this post htat I remember from ages ago and have somehow just managed to find because Tumblr's terrible search function decided to work for me today:

It was about a year ago that I had the extremely clever idea of adding that Taskmaster screenshot to that other person's text post, but I maintain that it's hilarious. Guy Montgomery and David Correos were so much fun because of this. At the time, I considered instead using a screenshot from Taskmaster UK season 5, with the speech bubble pointing at Mark Watson looking at Nish Kumar. There are so many example of two people whose comedy show interactions have been hilarious because they're based on one person making terrible decisions and the other person looking at them like "I'd follow him to hell and back but I wish he'd just stop going there." And not always a him, it doesn't have to be a him! Danielle Ward and Margaret Cabourn-Smith had some good "I'd follow her to hell and back but I wish she'd just stop going there" energy on Do the Right Thing (with Danielle Ward, of course, in the Correos/Kumar/Robins position).

I'm sure I realized until right now, as I write this, how much this might be my favourite dynamic in comedy because it also characterizes my favourite relationships in my own life. And I am genuinely not sure whether that's a me thing or whether most people can slot most of their relationships into one where someone's the David and someone's the Guy, in terms of who keeps driving things to hell and who follows out of loyalty but also apologizes. When I was in high school, and also for most of my twenties, my nickname among my friends was "loose cannon" because when they were trying to be careful and diplomatic in the political battles within the increasingly high levels that we reached in the sporting world, I was the person who once yelled at my coach in a hallway because I was so angry at the way he treated the athletes, and had a letter in my coaching file by age 22 that accused me of not caring about common courtesy. A letter from a coach who refused to work with me anymore because I was insufficiently courteous, so my best friend had to liaise with him on everything while asking me to please not upset more people and further alienate our team. And I have wonderful friends who tell other people that I don't hate them, really, I just seem standoffish because I'm shy, and later on they tell me that I really need to work on my poker face/ability to be around people I hate without making it incredibly obvious that I hate them. In addition to being genuinely shy. When we tried to get someone from my team elected to the provincial board, we knew from the beginning that 1) I would do all the actual work for both the election campaign and, if successful, the role itself, because I know and care the most about the issues and am good at admin stuff, and 2) I could not be the candidate because I hate most people and everyone I hate knows I hate them because I have no diplomacy skills.

Though I do also have one friend who coaches a team in another city and he knows he can call me pretty much any time and ask me for pretty much any favour and I will do it, and I will edit his emails and do his research for him to help him fight his stupid pointless battles and to try to keep him on top of things even though he can't keep track of anything and keeps making wild badly planned decisions, and people ask me why I don't just let him fail and walk away, and I say I know he seems like a brash asshole with no ability to think ahead, but he's a really good guy, really, once you get to know him. It's got back to me that most people in our sports community assume I am or was sleeping with him, as that seems like the only explanation for why I would stick by a guy who's clearly an idiot. The truth is much weirder, he was my university teammate in 2013 and one time he was in my corner when I had a panic attack in the middle of a match at the university national championships, and he saved me and got me through it and I managed to go back and win, and that's why I had to do things like sleep on a hotel room floor for a week in Atlantic City because he'd talked me into going on a provincial team trip where he hadn't booked enough rooms (or planned anything), because he'd earned my eternal loyalty. Oh God, I just remembered how during that trip he stopped to gamble in front of children, and I ended up yelling at him in the middle of the street in Atlantic City, "You know, I argue with people about you!" And he said, "What people?" And I said "People who think you're not responsible enough to run a provincial team trip! Which is everyone! I get into big arguments with them and you make it hard when you do shit like this!" But a few years later he was the first person I called when our mutual friend died because I realized in that moment, that's the person I trust most in the world.

Anyway. What was I talking about? Elis James and John Robins. I think I was talking about Elis James and John Robins. Okay, turns out listening to people talk about the friendships that you base on blind loyalty and apologism brought some stuff up for me. I think I have, in recent weeks, at times blamed my overly emotional posting - my posts that start out as comedy analysis but then go into oversharing about my person life - on the fact that I'm going through some emotionally difficult stuff as I'm trying to avoid drinking. But that's not the case here, I think I was always going to go on that tangent. I haven't seen my friend from out of town in a while, I'm a bit worried about him. I think he might be ruining his own life again. Something was going to connect to that. Rhod Gilbert reminds me of him.

Anyway. Anyway. Elis James and John Robins. Solid double act dynamic. Weird balance of status and tensions, enjoyable running thread of loyalty and apologism. Amazingly, I'm not done, here's another clip I cut out of that ComCom interview:

This is the second time I've heard John Robins tell this story, and I had the same reaction as the first time, which was: Oh my God oh my God oh my God, how were you ever able to sleep again? The horrible sharp pain of this story keeps me awake at night, just imagining what it would be like if that happened to me, and it didn't even happen to me. How could you ever sleep if it did? John Robins frequently tells stories from what he calls the "shame well", those things that happen where you obsess over how you did something wrong and regret it. John is constantly making jokes (or just statements) about how he lives a life mired in shame and regret. But still, I don't see how he can just casually throw this one out there like it's just another shame well story. It's so much worse. It's the worst one I've heard. I would hide under my bed for the rest of my life.

John Robins went on Adam Buxton's podcast in 2016, I have listened to that episode and it's not great. You want to talk about dynamics created by a differential in status - I think that one went way too far, to the point where nothing could really happen. There was this huge discrepancy of John Robins meeting his hero, which will often make someone sort of adorably giddy but not in this case, he just seemed a bit out of it and subdued. While on the other side, Adam Buxton appeared to have no idea who John Robins was, so not much discussion got generated. It wasn't a complete disaster, but I could understand why John didn't plug that one on his radio show, despite plugging most of his podcast appearances.

Anyway though, if I can manage to get past the sheer horror of the first part of that clip, the second part was sort of nicely validating. Because I am slightly weary of how much my trip down the Elis and John rabbit hole has got quite intense quite quickly, even by my standards of comedy obsession, and possibly taken a turn for the parasocial. I mean, I am currently writing a multi-page post about an interview they gave and it includes several paragraphs about my own life that are only tenuously related, in a way that I can say "Look I do the same thing as these guys I've never met."

The intensity of that has definitely been accelerated by the fact that I happened to, by a genuine coincidence, get into this show at the same time as I decided to try to slow down and/or stop drinking, and God, a lot of the ways in which John Robins talks about alcohol and anxiety resonates. And yep, I'd feel weird admitting it because I know it's sort of inherently creepy to say "they feel like my friends" about some people you've never met, but since John Robins said it first I think I can admit those headphones do make a difference. Might be another reason why I prefer the Bandcamp comedy to a Netflix special.

They touch on this throughout the ComCom interview - not so much in the clips I cut out but throughout the whole thing, it really is worth a listen if you're interested in this - the way their radio show gets so many letters from people who thank them for talking so honestly about mental health issues, people who say they've dealt with their own difficult shit and find this radio show has helped. Probably lots of shows get similar letters, but I think it's safe to say this one gets more than most. The Bugle used to read out their correspondence and Andy Zaltzman wasn't getting people every day saying "Thank you for making me feel less alone in my depression."

They really are good at that, at hitting the exact right balance of honest without being overbearing about it. For a show that spends so much time talking about symptoms of mental health problems, they almost never use the words "mental health". They never sit down and say "let's have a talk about what it's like to live with anxiety." They just describe their week, in more honest detail than you would normally hear on commercial radio. And leave in the parts where they panic about every decision they've ever made and get drunk alone in the middle of the night and cry because they think they've done everything wrong. And by "they", I mostly mean John.

I do like their word, "darkness". I didn't realize, when I first watched The Darkness of Robins in 2022 (a show John first performed in 2017, won a large award for it, released as a Netflix special in 2018, but I watched it in 2022), that that title's been around for ages. Elis James made a joke in an early radio episode, from 2014, about how someday, John should do a show called The Darkness of Robins, where he just lays bare all his anxieties, all his weird toxic quirks and control freak tendencies and oceans of shame and regret and various addictions/self-medication and cynicism and bitterness and anger and deep self-loathing. Elis said this as a joke, the joke being that you can't just put all that in a comedy show. But they kept the joke going for years. John did the Richard Herring podcast, in which he talked a bit about some of the more difficult mental health struggles he's had, and when he plugged it on the radio show, instead of saying "I talk about some of my more difficult mental health struggles", he said, "There's a fair bit of the darkness of Robins in it." And then he started casually referencing it on the show, describing a night when he might have drank too much and had a panic attack with a causal and sort of joke-y "I got overcome by the darkness for a little while." And then they started describing those emails from listeners who say it resonated with "[Person] has emailed in to say they've been afflicted by a touch of the darkness, sorry to hear that." And I just love that word. It's used with enough genuineness to make it clear that they're not making fun of mental health problems, they really do have them and it does feel dark. But also with enough irony - obviously there is irony in using a term as grandiose as "The Darkness of Robins" to describe panicking at 3 AM about something bad you said in school - to make it feel like it's not an after school special. I also like that they found a way to let that word mean no one has to name a diagnosis, to narrow their issue down to a loaded term like "I suffer from clinical depression", when not everyone who has that is diagnosed, not everyone is comfortable naming it, not everyone finds it easy to separate their symptoms into clear-cut causes. They can just use a shorthand like "the darkness".

It has been good, to have this radio show for the last couple of months that have brought some darkness into particularly sharp focus, as I decided to quickly remove the maladaptive self-medication. I've tried to stop writing about it so often the way I did earlier in the year, but as a little update on how that's going, still bad. Not enjoying it. Getting mildly parasocial about some guys on the radio might not be hugely healthy, but it's a healthier coping mechanism than whiskey, I guess. I'd really like some whiskey. Anyway I'm fine.

I do think that's why I find that Adam and Joe story so incredibly painful, though. I get paranoid about whether I get too parasocial about the comedians I like, I try really hard to be self-aware about it and be super clear that I know what I'm getting is a curated public persona and I do not actually know these people, and I am mortified at the thought of being one of those fans who thinks they actually are my friends and therefore they should know something about me. No one should know me. I hang out on Tumblr because it's the one social media platform where I know no famous people are searching their own name or anything, everyone's just an anonymous nerd. The thought of anyone knowing me makes me want to hide under my bed for the rest of my life. Though having said that, John Robins and Elis James are always very nice about people who write in with darkness emails.

Amazingly, I'm still not done this post:

Throwing this in just to say, once again, that I'm sorry for having also thought this but in my defense it's not just me. I am truly sorry that when I first heard John Robins got sober, my first thought was... but he's still going to be bitter and angry and annoying and plagued by regret and self-loathing, right? Because that's kind of the cornerstone of his comedy and is what I love so much about it. I mean obviously I want him to be happy, but could he release a couple more stand-up hours first?

I feel genuinely guilty for having thought that, especially because I do hold the sort of political belief that it's bullshit to say one must suffer to make great art, van Gogh did his best work once his mental illness was being treated, and all that. I do believe it applies to more contemporary things too. Jason Isbell made his best music after getting sober. I think James Acaster's best stand-up show might be his current ones, and it's a "let me tell you how therapy has made me healthier" show. But John Robins did base a lot of his comedy on being bitter and angry and annoying and plagued by regret and self-loathing. That's sort of my favourite thing about it.

I felt slightly better when I re-listened to his 2014 show (recorded in 2015) This Tornado Loves You, and was reminded that he admitted that himself:

That's John Robins talking about how his comedy has suffered because he's too happy in his relationship with Sara Pascoe, a relationship that has ended a 20-year search for happiness. And it goes with the clip I posted before that from the ComCom episode, of Elis James saying it's nice that John's relationship with Sara Pascoe recently ended, because it's given the quality of his comedy a real boost. And maybe they should just ruin John's life regularly to keep it that way. So it's not just me who had that horrible thought.

I'm feeling the need to clarify, once again, that of course I don't genuinely think that's a good thing. Obviously it's good that he got sober, for his sake but also, reports suggest his latest show Howl is excellent. I think Howl was written partly while he was drinking and partly while he wasn't, but performed after he'd quit, and the fact that it's done so well suggests that people can, in fact, make their best stuff after getting their shit together (I haven't actually heard the show, he's said he'll release it on Bandcamp sometime soon-ish, probably). And even if his comedy did get worse, which it clearly hasn't, it would still be best that he quit drinking because suffering wouldn't be worth great art, even if it were required for it. That's how it works. Drinking is bad for you. I definitely don't want to drink any whiskey right now. It's fine.

But. But. I recently re-listened to John Robins' episode of Isy Suttie's podcast, The Things We Do For Love. This is a rare instance that I've heard of a comedian being genuinely drunk while recording something. It's happened before that comedians will claim to be a bit loose and tipsy, but not usually so drunk that they're slurring their words. John Robins on Isy Suttie's podcast was slurring his words. He kept losing track of the question and interrupting at inappropriate moments. It's one of those things that makes me say "Oh, yeah, you really needed to quit drinking. This really was affecting your career, that's just a guy who showed up to work too drunk to effectively do his job."

But it was really funny. It made me laugh so many times. At one point he gets furious because Isy Suttie asked him whether he knows how to drive a car. Later on he threatens to murder her and Elis for their sitcom money, which would have been an okay joke but tbere was a bit of a sense of line crossing when he also threatened their child. (Fun side note that has nothing to do with John being drunk: at one point Isy tells a story about her ex-boyfriend, John Robins asks what the ex's name is but she refuses to say, which is weird because I know. It's weird that I know something about Isy Suttie that John Robins didn't, at least on that day.) It's a mess. It's hilarious. I feel vaguely guilty for finding that so funny, the same way I do about the episodes of No More Jockeys where Mark Watson gets properly drunk - that guy's probably got a problem too, I probably shouldn't laugh at it so much, but I also find those the funniest episodes. I have the say, the episode of Adam Buxton's podcast where John Robins was sort of awkwardly reserved would probably have been funnier if John had gotten drunk before it.

My best defense for that is I would not want John Robins to actually be drunk when he performs stand-up, or certainly when he writes it. Being drunk made him funnier on a podcast interview where he's supposed to tell off-the-cuff stories, because off-the-cuff stories get better when someone's filter has been broken down. But also, in his actual stand-up, or even his actual radio broadcasting, John Robins is doing a thousand little things at once to make what he's saying funnier. He's the master of the well-timed pause and the carefully chosen word. None of that would be any good drunk. So I maintain that you don't need to suffer addiction to make great art. It might help a bit to make funny tangents on an interview podcast, but not the actual substance. Also, however funny I found it, I don't think he was proud of that one. On the radio show, John plugged his appearance on Isy Suttie's podcast before he did it, but not one word about it on the radio after it had been recorded, even though most of those things he'll plug both before and once they're released. Though in a later episode of her podcast, Isy mentioned that the first guest she'd had on was a very drunk John Robins, who called her the next day desperately asking her to cut out the sexually explicit story he'd told using an old girlfriend's real name.

And she did cut it out, it's not in the podcast, as it shouldn't be, because it's not responsible to tell sexually explicit stories in something that's being recorded and will be published, if the audience knows the real name of the person you're talking about. Having said that, I've finally reached the point in the radio show where John's doing WIPs of The Darkness of Robins, where he does just that about Sara Pascoe, and I'm having a bit of trouble morally justifying how much I like the show in spite of that. I think I'll re-watch that show tomorrow, for the first time in nearly a year and a half. I'll see how that goes. I remember it as being very, very good. But also, in the last few weeks, I've had three different people watch it because of my posts about John Robins, and all of them came back to me to point out that the stories about Sara Pascoe are pretty inappropriate to tell on stage. I'm still holding out hope that I'll hear him clarify on the radio show that he did run that stuff by her before saying it publicly, or at least before recording it for Netflix.

Anyway, this post got a bit out of hand. I've tried for the last couple of weeks to slow down on my posting about the Elis/John radio show, and the posting about my personal life, but I seemed to have built up a lot to say and put it all in this one. I'm doing fine.

[oncedied]

about the pro shipping post you are so fucking right. when i was 16 i had proship dni on an aesthetic blog that i ran and i had multiple people harassing me for it over months. i've also had them call me ableist and homophobic slurs and sexually harass me when i was 16-18 for untagged unsearchable posts that they had to have scrolled back months in my blog to find. i was in a fandom at the time that had a LOT of people like that and there were many other people who got worse and had proshippers being wildly racist to them. they say curate your online experience and then throw a fit when you actually do.

Hi i'm sorry I didn't respond to this sooner! I was most likely absorbed entirely in skyrim Once Again.

Yeah, the proship movement has a tendency to harbor the absolute worst people in fandom circles and when you say "Hey if your movement is Truly Safe for victims/people of color /disabled folks/kids/etc then why the fresh sam hill fuck are you harboring Actual Racists, Actual Pedophiles, And Actual Horrible People" they take it as "kys lol go die" and not a request to Actually examine how their stances on something as terminally online as shipping discourse and the culture that it founded has sheltered these types of people.

And it's this inaction and refusal to address it in favour of perceiving it as a siege in a war that isn't actually happening (for lack of a better way to word it, no, people aren't out to get you they're asking you to examine your fucking community and WHY so many people feel unsafe around it aside from other reasons) is why I, and so many others, are in dislike of proshipping culture aside from. well. gestures wildly to the rest of it.

They take it as a blow to their egos rather than a genuine honest "Hey if what you ship Truly Is Inconsequential why does the culture you cultivate harbor, say, Actual Offending Pedophiles or Those Pedophiles That Label Themselves As "No-Contact" For Some Reason As If That Makes It Less Bad that are utilizing fandom space and proship culture as a quick and easy way to get targets within their reach?"

Side tangent/note here: Over the years many people have said that I cannot be pro-dark media and anti-proship. These things are not mutually exclusive and many, and I mean MANY people in circles focussing on dark and transgressive media are FULLY AWARE of the connection between reality and fiction (and how they both affect one another, the best way I can word it is that if you focus on one color pallet soon your world will be monochromatic, you gotta learn to focus on all the colors. If you saturate your life with too much "dark" or distressing content it will color your worldview and that is not what life is about) and often emphasize the importance of this distinction.

They also do not go out of their way to overly-romanticize the content they read (the public perception/general society's consumption of Lolita [vladimir nobokov] has been a disaster for the human race. if u think lolita is supposed to be a cute romance story you're misinterpreting the book and need to step back and examine just why you think that way and actually sit down and analyze the book and humbert as a character dear god stop turning it into a cutesy coquette aesthetic, shanespeare has a fucking amazing video talking about it and as an added bonus it's shorter than the typical 4+ hour video essays I often indulge in) as they often know better to do so and shun the people who do, ESPECIALLY when you're talking about books like The Slob (Aron Beauregard, even though that novel is essentially misogyny, homophobia, gore porn, a lot of fatphobia and shit like that and is all-around poorly written)

proshipping culture also relies a lot on a fanfic/fanart medium which is a VASTLY inappropriate place to explore these things (on top of, well, the type of people the culture has a tendency to attract n shit vs transgressive/dark media corners) and People Do Not Want To See Headcanons About Their Favourite Characters Being Rapists And Shit Like That I Promise You You Aren't "Coping" You're Just Making (some not all) People Around You Uncomfortable And Fucking Miserable Because You Decided That Their Comfort Character Is A Shotacon Or Some Shit (and that is before I get into how unless that character is canonically a piece of shit, making x character into a freak is a gross mischaracterization).

People come into fandoms for escapism, or to enjoy characters and stories with people and, yes I am speaking from personal experience here not only as ex-proship but also someone who's been 'round the block when it comes to fandoms.

There is a difference between transgressive lit i.e Lolita and someone writing a fanfic about a father/daughter relationship and not in the wholesome familial way we all know and love. That is knowing your place, understanding that fandom is a WILDLY inappropriate place to explore these things (seriously people, just write an original book! you got it in you clearly! i believe in you and maybe if you do it right you'll write something that's very touching and profound and opens up a lot of conversations!) and that fiction and reality do in fact impact and shape each other in more ways than you'd initially assume.

anyways rant/tangent over, sorry I went on for so long, I'm Very passionate about this discussion despite everything that's happened to me at the hands of it.

#caydeposting #thanks for the ask + happy holidays #sorry for rambling i have a LOT of thoughts on the matter #i actually want to write an essay/video essay about like. #the differences between proshipping culture and transgressive media circles #i'm thinking primary research #actually going out and interviewing people who identify w/ proship circles #HOWEVER that is risky as I'll never get an honest answer considering proshippers are like #fucking religious about getting people to take on their stance and every #question i'd ask would be met with this biased veneer of trying to look like they're poor innocent #people being atagonized by big mean bullies #and not honest cut-to-the-facts answers to my research. #because I want to treat fanfic/fanart as an Actual Derivative Art Form for the sake of it (if that isn't what it is already) #i'll have to polish my english honor roll off for it though lmfao #but yknow.

[blazethecheeto]

what are your arrowverse rarepairs?

okay so this is gonna be fun especially as i'm not sure what counts as a rarepair

ARROW

lauricity (laurel x felicity) <- the first words she said to laurel was 'gorgeous laurel' ok she was crushing hard

shasladiver?!?! (shado x oliver x slade + please tell me if they have another name) <- domestic. cute. island. trio. before. the. incident. "what's the worst way your ship has ever died" "oh so slade fake-died and then oliver accidentally murdered shado and then he appeared just as she died and she never knew he was alive so he held her dead body in his arms as oliver was forever shrouded in guilt then slade became corrupted from a drug and oliver had to kill him too but he wasn't really dead and came back for revenge"

smoaksiren (siren x felicity) <- i already ranted about this one i LOVE THEM.

terrificdog (rene x curtis) <- they're so gay and chaotic x nerdy duos are the best even dinah agrees

constanqueen (oliver x constantine) <- why was constantine so flirty to him in that one episode they probably hooked up let's be honest

smoakingcanary (felicity x sara) <- 'YOU'RE STILL CUTE'

alicity (felicity x alena) <- they were actually adorable oh my god

lauryssa (laurel x nyssa) <- supposed to be canon you can't convince me otherwise

(gotta love how much felicity ships are in there girlie has chemistry with everyone)

FLASH

coldflash (snart x barry) <- does this even count as a rarepair they're so popular i mean thematic parallels, red x blue, enemies to lovers, homo-erotic flirting

snowwest (iris x caitlin) <- lauricity coded also the entirety of 4x05

balph?!?! (barry x ralph) <- the entirety of s4. that's all.

blackfrost (frost x siren) <- they're each other in a different font just IMAGINE THE FUCKING POWER.

bulian?!? (barry x julian) <- enemies to lovers and just very sus moments in s3 that made me say 'hold up fruity'

killersnow (caitlin x frost) <- new ship but oh my god its growing on me they're smoaksiren in a different font

(gotta love how barry is half of them he's so shippable)

SUPERGIRL

superwire (leslie x kara) <- dude they're so coldflash coded

agentreign (alex x sam) <- i still can't believe they're not canon

psiwire (psi x leslie) <- that one episode in s3. got me thinking thoughts.

superlane (kara x lucy) <- i shipped them so much in s1 oh my god

monwinn (mon-el x winn) <- bro has a thing for aliens

scholson (james x winn) <- nah bc this could lowkey work

superbat (kara x kate + is there another name?) <- kate was 1000% flirting with kara in the elseworlds crossover

LEGENDS OF TOMORROW

coldatom (ray x snart) <- snart has a type and it's self-righteous red coded dark haired boys

lovebirds (kendra x sara) <- this was so unexpected but like hello they trained together and she got sara back from the league

timehex (jonah x rip) <- actually no way u can convince me they aren't exes

whiteatom (sara x ray) <- they're so sweet and they're the time parents and so underrated

steelatom (nate x ray) <- bromance.

hellcanary (sara x constantine) <- hhhh i could rant so much bro but they get each other and they are friends with benefits and both have ties to demons and can understand each other's hurt and are chaotic bisexuals and-

atomhawkcanary (sara x ray x kendra) <- they lived together for like a year ok things probably happened.

thanks for asking!!!! damn there's a lot lol

#i usually go for rarepairs bc god forbid i ship something that has lots of content for me to consume #mine #fandom rant #arrow #the flash #supergirl #legends of tomorrow #my faves #im not tagging all of the ships my god #ask post

[crazyf0rswayze]

Dating Andrew Clark Hc's

-would let you wear his varsity jacket

-would let you wear his hoodies

-if you guys got Saturday detention together....idfk how that would go it would be crazy

-andy is PDA sometimes so if u guys were stuck together for 8 hrs

-he would NOT be able to keep his hands off you

-but at the same time he's not PDA

-it depends on what mood he's in

-would probably try and run off with you

-john would definitely tease you guys

-brian would be like wtf is going on with you two

-allison would giggle at you guys bc she would think it's funny how Andy always wants his hands on you

-clair would get mad and scoff n sh!t bc let's be honest it's annoying to watch

-andy likes to try and tickle you

-when you guys are at home and playing around he shows off how easy it is to pin you

-he would like toss you and pin you on the couch n stuff

-goes to parties with you

-if you guys go to a party his arm in around your waist the entire night

-if you guys have classes together he would try and sit next to you all the time

-little notes in class like,

-'youre so pretty' and definitely some 'babe what's the answer?'

-also some 'hey, wanna go out with me' as if you guys aren't already dating

-teacher would have to separate him from you and he would complain after class

-'wtf! I can't sit with my girlfriend!?' 'andy you were being such a distraction!'

-if you guys didn't have classes together he would run up behind you and pick you up

-this man is so romantic and also cheesy

-its a little 'coded' by other characters but like...come on he seems so sweet when he's not mad

-bc he was mad the entire movie.

-like be was so sweet and happy with Allison when they got together so...ya

-he would kiss you in the halls and hold you hand in the halls

-would let you sit with him at lunch and if his "friends" teased you he would tell them off and move to a different table

-would hold you and rock you if you cried

-if he cried n you found him he would be mad and he would try n walk away because he's supposed to be tough

-anyway....

-loves going on cute little dates

-movies, picnics, dinner, cuddle at home and talk about ur day!

-carries some of your favorite snacks with him in case you get hungry

-like in the halls if you say you're hungry he'll js pull out like a fricking granola bar...and another from a pocket

-'oh here you guys hun!' 'andy since when!?'

-is probably how that'd go

-he likes buying you little gifts. Like anything that makes him think of you

-'oh here I got you this little necklace. I know you like teddy bears so it has a little bear charm on it!'

-sweetest man ever!

Sorry they kinda suck! I haven't watched the movie in a little bit! I hope they're ok!

#andrew clark #breakfast club #hcs #kks writings

[levinbolts]

9, 19, & 27 for rhys’ archfrenemy, valen

ARCHFRENEMY RHYS PLS LAKJDSLFJKSDF they like u rhys i promise they're just a shithead im sorry

9. Do they give tough love or gentle love most often? Which do they prefer to receive?

i'd say it's about 60/40 in favor of tough love for both? it depends on who the other party is and what the circumstances are. absolutely do not coddle them but also do Not be an asshole either. don't patronize them but also don't belittle them either. it's a very fine line you sometimes have to walk with them and stepping over it on either side will trigger their anger very quickly.

generally speaking, being honest and blunt with them is usually the safest option, though, even if it does irritate them sometimes. but if they're allowing themselves to be open and vulnerable with you and you choose to be harsh with them, well...they simply will Not Do That again. in those moments where they're feeling fragile and emotional, they need gentle love and anything less will end with them shutting you out, possibly indefinitely. they, unfortunately, are not a very forgiving person in most situations.

19. What would they do if stuck in a room with the person they’ve been avoiding?

being the little asshole they are, they will just straight up pretend that they aren't there. they'll ignore every single attempt at talking or getting their attention. if the person touches them, they will make a vague threat of violence and then resume ignoring them. if valen is avoiding you, they will not talk to you at all until they're ready. and will just get pissed off and possibly lash out if you try to corner them.

27. What’s the worst gift they ever received? How did they respond?

their facial scars were a gift from their father and they responded by killing him.

ok in all seriousness, the worst gift they've gotten was a hand-me-down pair of pants from his father. they were too big, holey, dirty, and looked like one more wash would disintegrate them instantly. now if it had been from anyone else, they probably wouldn't have had an immediate reaction at all (they were poor, any source of clothing they didn't have to pay or work for should have been considered one of the highest forms of kindness, right? that's what their mom would say); he would have given them a very forced smile and tossed them into the nearest garbage can when they weren't looking. but coming from the man that had been nothing but a source of anxiety and distress their entire life?? the man that was supposed to take care of them, but instead treated them like a demon uninvited into his home? well, valen told him to go fuck himself, obviously, and that started an all out fist fight that ended with a good portion of the room being fried when valen lost control of their magic in the middle of it.

#lext post #oc: valen

[froms8nsashes]

Joey hid behind her, looking around at the seadweller club the humans disguised as trolls found themselves in for jeevik week. The venue seemed to change just as they had gotten used to Cridea's hive party and were mingling with some trolls with Xefros' help. Of course, everyone's favorite friendly clown Marvus made sure that they weren't getting in trouble at the party, mostly he just wanted to look out for his lowblood friends.

Jeevik week day 2 had brought them to a club, Finz, located somewhere in the seadweller district. Everything was so fancy. Sometimes there were things made from solid gold. Cridea had handed them a bunch of cash before she disappeared into the partying crowd, apparently the dollars marked high were the only thing worth trading. Xefros was more anxious about the hundred bills, making Joey take them because she was so laid back about it.

"Omg! Cridea told me about You guYs! Love the horns bY the waY, theY reallY are blending in prettY well!"

"What! These- These aren't fake!" Xefros' eyes widened. He looked petrified.

"Dont worrY! Trust me when I saY this, no one cares. At least not here, people care about paryting and the music. It's not like in Outglut where You have to worrY about the heiress bombing us." She looked so laidback.

Isabel stole a look around the room noticing how all trolls from the hemospectrum mingled with one another. No one was terrified, no one was scared. It was convival.

"Even if someone causes a problem, we have some people to deal with." She giggled and put her hand on Xefros' shoulder. "MY matesprit is prettY strong." She nodded at the bar behind them. "Oh, You can call me Zilvie bY the waY. I'm a co-owner of this fine establishment,"

"Oh! I'm Joey, and this is Xefros, and my friend Isabel!"

"I... Still don't understand half of the things happening around us right now," Isabel whispered to Xefros, idly playing with the ends of her pink hair.

"Wait, co-owner? Does that mean the heiress owns this too?" Xefros asked.

"No, sillY! MY moirail and I own this place together, our whole deal was to create a place where people could mingle and feel safe,"

"Wow, that's not what I expected..."

"Wait, what did you expect?" Isabel looked around at all the grey-skinned trolls with candy corn colored horns. "Was something supposed to happen? Is this where we actually die?"

"Well... No one really knows what seadweller's are like, violet and fuschia kind of stick to their own crowd." Xefros was sweating and fidgeting alot, glancing at Zilvie every one in a while. Was he expecting her to cull him?

"The culture is fairlY different between the lower bloods on the spectrum, let's be honest." She chuckled. "AnYwaY! I hope You enjoY the partY," As quickly as she appeared from the crowd she had disappeared into the crowd again, although she was taller than most trolls she still blended into the sea of colors. With no idea where Cridea went Xefros and Joey looked a little lost. The trio were standing there, just standing without doing anything else.

"hey, wazz up lil rusties"

"Marvus!" Joey's face lit up and she relaxed.

"(oh no we're going to die)" Xefros whispered to Isabel.

"I ain't gon cull u wym" Marvus chuckled and ruffled his hair, towering over the three of them. "I saw u three bored so I figured I'd say hi lol :o)"

"It's just a little overwhelming is all, I mean, all these... trolls everywhere."

"Crowds get a lil easier more u be with 'em" Marvus shrugged. "Don't worry tho I could get you some seats" It surprised Isabel when he flashed finger guns and then waved for them to follow him.

For a juggalo and a purpleblood Marvus was the kindest they've encountered so far, even if he let Chahut hold Xefros and Isabel while Joey played his murder game. He was still very kind and very forgiving. The larger than life troll had sauntered over to table quite literally in the middle of the club. It was situated to face the stage where some lowblood seemed to be performing.

At further inspection there was someone sitting at the table. Another troll-- obviously cause why wouldn't they be a troll-- with violet colored hair. Their horns leaned toward another with a piercing connecting them at the pointed end. Red sunglasses covered their eyes and headphones hung around their neck. They wore a black hoodie over a dark violet turtle neck. Like the rest of the trolls there was a violet-colored symbol smack dab in the middle of their hoodie.

"/\Mmarvus I told you I'mm busy with sommethinng here./\" The troll didn't look up, just typing away on their husktop.

"yea I kno" The clown sat down and his eyes flickered to Xefros, Isabel, and Joey. "jo an her friends need somewhere to sit an this is the only open table"

"Oh, hey, that's the guy with the eye patch thingy up there." Isabel pointed at the mustard blooded troll. "What was their name..."

"Cirava." Xefros answered all too quickly, following suit as Joey sat down with the violet-blooded troll.

"So, I'm Joey and this is-- "

"/\Yea yea. I donn't have timme for mminnglinng./\"

"So, you're like some fish DJ?" Isabel asked.

Marvus' still looked pretty laidback but she noticed he tensed up a bit, looking the other way rather quickly. Xefros also looked like he was silently panicking, but he always was silently panicking.

"/\I amm nnot just a *fish DJ* actually callinng mme a fish is also derogatory./\"

"Well, aren't you a fish? I mean you have the webbed ears and I can see the gills poking out of the turtle neck." Isabel looked at Marvus and Xefros for a second, confused, then turned back to the other troll.

When the troll finally looked up they sported angel bite piercings and some pretty prominent fangs. The light of the husktop glinted on the red shades occluding their eyes from view. It was impossible to tell their reaction, mostly because the shades also covered part of their eyebrow. They really were too big.

"/\Get inn linne if you wannt to fill out mmy black quadrannt./\"

"I'm sorry what- "

"(I Xplained this to you on the train)" Xefros mumbled.

"Yeah, okay? I still don't get it." She said offhandedly to her companion. "There's no need to get worked up over some stupid nickname, you are literally a fish."

"/\Say that onne mmore timme.../\"

"Ok ok I kno things be getting rough especially bcause of the high energy but y don't u take it down a notch Chekrit"

And just like that Marvus was somehow able to smooth things over.

"Cehkrit? Like Cehkrit Fiahes?" Xefros' eyes lit up. "The faceless DJ that has been blowing up all over grubtube?"

"/\Yeah I'mm your faceless DJ kid./\"

"I didn't know trolls could have DJ's." Joey tilted her head. "Guess our planets really are similar,"

"Are you two moirails? You seem to listen to Marvus a lot." Joey asked.

"/\What nno mme annd Mmarvus are nnot mmoirails. Zilvie is mmy mmoirails./\"

"So then- "

"Joey! You can't just ask that!" Xefros threw a hand over her mouth quickly."

"/\I donn't have the ennergy to fill my red quadrannt or anny of mmy quadrannts at the mmommennt./\"

"I don't believe you at all, if you didn't have the energy then why- "

"I'm so sorry about her! Joey, let's go get something to drink!" Isabel moved so that Xefros and Joey could scoot out of the booth. She laughed at how protective he was being because she swore he said something about how cerulean's get protective of the people in their quadrants. Maybe that was all trolls?

"/\For ann alienn you still have a lot to learnn./\" Chekrit was back looking at his husktop.

"Wait, you two know I'm- "

"It's p obvious yo ur skin ain't gray" Marvus added a honk, leaning back on the side of the booth he took over completely.

"/\You also have traffic connes onn your head. I donn't knnow how people took that seriously./\"

"Do you get out, even a little? That is not how you talk to people."

"/\. Seadweller's are seperated fromm the the land-dweller's. Annd there is nno way I would talk to annother violet blood. All they wannt to talk about is cullinng./\"

"Why are you seperated?"

"Cuz we all b seperated" Marvus answered.

"Then how do you visit each other?"

"/\That's... *commplicated.*/\"

"I still don't get it,"

"/\You donn't get a lot of thinngs./\" Chekrit looked like he was rolling his eyes.

"hey play nice"

"/\This is starting to feel like ann ashenn quadrannt./\"

"Mayb it is mayb not"

"/\Sommetimmes I hate how laid back you are./\" Chekrit lowered the husktop screen but didn't fully close it. "/\You both are pitifully innfuriatinng but I also like it. Are you suggetinng ann ashenn quadrant./\"

"A what?" Isabel looked between the two trolls curiously. "What is going on right now? Am I being courted by the two of you or- "

"/\Technnically yes. I tennd to like the innsufferable onnes./\"

"Insufferable?!"

"/\What's this. What's that. Pick up a book. Clearly you havenn't./\" Was Cehkrit smiling?

"I don't mind the hate flirting but those lil rusties might" Marvus just sat there watching them like it was a show, or was he waiting to jump in when it got too intense?

Understanding quadrants and the way of relationships on Alternia was hard. It was weird. Most of all, where the hell do pails come in with all of this?

"Hate flirting? This isn't- What?!" Her face went red and she hid it in her shirt collar.

"/\I cann sennd you a book about quadrannts if you're really that clueless./\" Cehkrit chuckled.

"It might go 2 jo"

"/\Eh I donn't thinnk I care right nnow. I figured I swore of quadrannts but I guess I was wronng./\"

"You're so unenthusiastic."

"/\Annd you read like ann openn book./\"

"hey hey no pailing on the table we eat here"

"Butt out Marvus!" / "/\Butt out Mmarvus./\"

"aight just trying to loosen tension" He couldn't hold in his laugh and there was a hint of a smile.

"/\I'll take it you donn't knnow auspustice./\"

"Wha- "

"/\The ashenn quadrannt inn which conntainns three people. Let's say you me and Mmarvus for exammple. Mmarvus mmakes sure we donn't actually cull each other, but sommetimmes cann joinn inn onn the hating./\"

"So basically just enemies to lovers with a polyamorous twist?"

"/\What to what with a what twist./\"

"I'm not going to explain it." Isabel chuckled awkwardly. "So basically we have hate sex and sometimes Marvus watches?"

"tf yo" Marvus rose a brow.

Clearly these two trolls wouldn't understand speech from Earth.

"Nevermind."

"/\So technnically we're datinng annd Mmarvus is like the wisdomm or advice personn./\"

"Oh, okay. That makes sense."

Joey and Xefros were sitting at the bar. The redblooded troll couldn't help but keep glancing over at the trio sitting by the stage. He was anxious. Wringing his hands together worriedly as he sipped on a water. Well, barely actually touched the water. Joey was waiting for him to say something first. Happily drinking her water. It tasted very fruity. Better than the tap water back home.

"I can't believe she didn't get culled."

"She is naturally charismatic," Joey giggled. "It make sense how she can make friends so quickly.

"I was getting the vibe that he wanted to form a quadrant with her."

"But didn't he say- "

"Sometimes trolls don't say what they mean."

"Which quadrant?"

"Auspustice."

"Doesn't that mean they hate each other?"

"No, well yes. It does. Like I said, all relationships are different. Our quadrant is not a one size fits all. X("

"So auspustice can be like polyamory?"

"What?"

"Dating multiple people."

"Maybe,"

#homestuck #hiveswap #hiveswap friendsim #marvus xoloto #fan troll #fuck around and find out my dudes #uhhh guess who's back in the funky horns and grey skin fandom #its me #im bringing back my bullshit #prepare to be annoyed #fan kid #fuschia blood #violet blood #purple blood #burgundy blood #joey clare #xefros tritoh #cirava hermod