#and what does will do? he just sits there and says the most deranged shit you ever heard | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

meguchi512 · 3 months

Text

assigning behaviors I've noticed in people to pjsk characters:

tsukasa: writes his name EVERYWHERE. his desk at school has "tsukasa" "tsukasa" "tsukasa" "tsukasa" written all over it, his notebooks too and even his classmates' notebooks (from a classmate)

shizuku: says "oh, madonna!" instead of "oh god" (from my italian grandpa)

saki: tsukasa rides a bike and saki sits on the handlebar & every time they have to stop they fall off but they just get up and go on like nothing's happened (from an old friend)

mizuki: accidentally sends "penis shaped messages" and immediately points it out (me)

ena: is so fucking done with mizuki's penis messages (my friends)

kanade: "uhh i think I'm forgetting something? oh well it probably wasn't important" hasn't drank water since yesterday (me again)

rui: extremely verbose, to the point where everyone around him thinks he's some sort of philosophical genius but in reality he's just saying dumb shit and articulating it intelligently (my italian grandpa again so sorry)

an: sends her friends "hot milfs in your area" messages pretending to be a bot because silly and immediately gets banned ( @robinoullea literally)

airi: wants to be supportive but types way too quickly ( @robinoullea trying to say "10/10")

emu: says the most deranged things in roblox chats and manages to not get censored while her friend (nene) can't even go one sentence without "########" ( @harukaisu )

nene, trying to tell tsukasa to reset his roblox avatar because he got stuck: uhhh kill yourself (me) (I'M SO SORRY)

minori: tries to download a pin and accidentally sends it to a random person and dies of embarrassment (everyone. no one is safe from Pinterest's AWFUL interface)

ichika: goes into a store. gets an ingredient. goes back home. goes back. gets an ingredient. goes back home. repeat until she's got everything to make dinner when it's already 11pm (my forgetful mom)

mafuyu: has the most DERANGED dreams I'm not even kidding ( @robinoullea when he had that one dream where he sent me a tiktok meme of Richard Watterson saying the names of popular pornstars with them flashing on screen for a second each. I've cried real tears about this btw)

kohane: has a chicken farm in minecraft but she's so attached to them that she can't kill any of them for food so they just keep reproducing and in turn the server keeps getting laggier. eventually a creeper explodes right next to it and she throws herself off a mountain (me)

haruka: uses the default pfp which is also the pfp that shows when you get blocked by someone. she also turns her phone off often (which causes messages to not get sent until it's on) so minori always panics and sends her messages to make sure she's not blocked (classmate)

akito: makes gagging noises on purpose because it makes ena gag too and get VERY annoyed and he finds it funny (classmate)

toya: unintentionally causes a lot of fights in vbs regarding what the best way to make coffee is (my whole friend group) (except me i do it on purpose)

honami: whenever someone tags her in l/n's group chat she heroically says "who calls for my help?" ( @robinoullea )

shiho: doesn't have the heart to tell honami how funny it is when she does that (not me i always make sure to mention it)

186 notes · View notes

jaynovz · 3 months

Text

I'm watching 1.7 and the break in Flint's voice when Gates is questioning him in the stable and he's like "I'm trying to answer the question" is devastating. The facial acting that Toby is doing here is like, he does great body language here and the trembling voice and nervous swallowing and darting eyes, you can see him trying to stave off some kind of extreme anxiety attack. Because. Like. God the flashbacks he must be having to London and Hennessey and Alfred Hamilton. Anyway, what he is saying just gets more and more desperate throughout the exchange, but legit he is trying to level with Gates the only way that he can in this moment. There is no version of Flint right now who could tell the whole truth, bc of his background, bc of the trauma, bc of what happened last time he trusted someone like that. So when we see what appears to be a mental BREAK, and he tells Gates his vision of sequestering a portion of the Urca gold for the future of Nassau and their men, that's him trying to explain his motivation the best way he can.

And the worst part is, he just sounds crazy and meglomaniacal and Machiavellian and DERANGED. It's exactly the wrong thing to say to Gates at that moment, they have already broken apart, it's too little too late, it's ten years too late!! Gates is hearing a lying maniac being conniving and cold and awful about Billy. But tbh, when I hear Flint say "He fell. Why? What do you think happened?" I just hear someone that WE KNOW doesn't know in his heart of hearts WHAT HE DID, WHAT HAPPENED, and he just... it would be easier if someone just told him.

I know we joke about Flint being full of SHIT, and he is in MUCH of the show, he does SO MUCH LYING. But this entire exchange doesn't feel like that. It feels like he's cracking and reaching and grasping and trying. And he has no earthly idea what path he would even take to get Gates back on side.

Gates says, "This is what we do. You orate and you dissemble and I look the other way..."

And the saddest fucking part, the most tragic of the tragedy is that HE'S NOT WRONG. That is what they do!! and it's. It's over! It's too much!

But poor fucking Captain, he just... He doesn't know how else to be.

And with regard to SilverFlint, and their arc... I've been thinking this go round about why it's different from Flint's relationship with Miranda or with Gates or with anyone...

And, well... It really is just a case of finding deep understanding from a person you never expected, isn't it?

At first it is extremely begrudging, because he doesn't have another choice, unwilling allies due to strife. But eventually it does becomes voluntary.

At its core, I think the reason that relationship is different, is because that becomes clear to Flint over time, and then he is able to offer up all the sides of himself to be further collated and understood.

And then faster than the speed of fucking light we get to 3.10 and 4.9: "You asked me where I began, and I felt that you were entitled to an answer. To the truth." and "I cannot do it without you." Silver says, "We might be friends by then" and by fuckin god they ARE. "As my partner as my friend" and "You know of me all I can bear to be known. All that is relevant to be known. That is to say, you know my genuine friendship and loyalty." So, what I've been circling is... sitting down in the woods and just telling Silver everything that happened in London is exactly what he can't do with Gates in 1.7 :////

#when I think about it I feel like somebody is pulling my guts out slowly #this got a little long it's expanded from some discord rambling #thoughts #black sails #black sails meta #black sails lb

173 notes · View notes

antianakin · 5 months

Note

It doesn't happen as much, but some people said that Taron Malicos (that crazy ex-Jedi from Fallen Order) was right about the Jedi's decline, forgetting that Malicos is mentally-deranged and fallen to the Dark Side. Not exactly the most reliable authority on Jedi history and culture, if you ask me.

Yeah, the Cal Kestis games sit in that sort-of "soft anti-Jedi"/"Jedi critical" space where they have moments that are absolutely telling the audience that the Jedi were weak, or at fault for what happened or old-fashioned/behind the times, but that they were still GOOD PEOPLE and Cal is absolutely still identifying as a Jedi whole-heartedly and doing Jedi stuff etc etc. The entire storyline of Fallen Order is that Cal and Cere are trying to find the list of Force sensitive kids so they can try to rebuild the Jedi Order and it's sad when they have to make the choice to let that dream go in order to protect the kids from the Empire. Cal getting Knighted by Cere is a happy, triumphant moment. The whole flashback to Order 66 being included and being SO SO SAD is a major element of the game. Cal and Merrin literally bond over being survivors of the devastating tragedy that is the total loss of their people. (It comes up even less in Survivor, the one place it shows up is within his romance with Merrin.)

So the message getting sent is that sure, MAYBE the Jedi weren't always perfect, but it also DOESN'T MATTER because nothing they did warranted what happened to them and it's still a good thing to be a Jedi. So Taron Malicos might be "right" in the sense that the narrative doesn't really specify one way or another (but sort-of implies that he might be), but being "right" doesn't justify being a selfish asshole and hurting other people. So it stops mattering at all if he's "right" or not anyway.

Rebels does similar stuff, quite honestly. This idea that the Jedi might've made mistakes in places, but that ultimately their loss is still SAD and Kanan is fucked up by it and both he and Ezra learn to be better people as they learn to commit to being true Jedi. It's a GOOD thing for both of them to become Jedi.

They both sit in this middle ground of saying that being a Jedi is a good thing and the loss of the Jedi is still a tragedy, but the current Jedi are going to learn from the mistakes of their predecessors who fucked up enough that it might've led them to their own doom. It's kinda sad that some of the better Jedi centric content we've gotten recently comes with this need to criticize the Jedi for shit they didn't even do, but it's VERY common. Even High Republic has elements of this in it from the few of the novels I've read.

But I will say that, as much as it's annoying to me personally to have to deal with that, it's better than something like, say, I don't know, the Ahsoka show which has the darksider characters NOT come across as evil selfish assholes and none of the main "Jedi" characters ever seem to actually identify (or even WANT to identify) as Jedi and implies that being a Jedi might be a lesser or inferior way to identify just in general and that there's nothing truly sad about the loss of the Jedi themselves. At least there's a lot of other generally positive Jedi stuff in Rebels and the Cal Kestis games to enjoy. Ahsoka didn't give a single Jedi positive moment in the entire fucking show.

#star wars #jedi fallen order #jedi survivor #cal kestis #jfo #taron malicos #rebels #star wars rebels #jedi #pro jedi #anti ahsoka show

65 notes · View notes

carlplsrailme · 2 years

Note

HII DAISY (with intention of making you witness my undying love for Carl) 🐈‍⬛🦈 ANON HERE I HAD THR MOST SEVERE BRAINROT YOU NEED TO HEAR THIS LMFOAOAOOO im so sorry in advance ily shawty 😕💗

♡♡♡

warnings: perv!carl, innocent!reader, fluffy carl, deranged ramblings, slight dubcon? (nothing too dark hes just a grabby lil guy), sort of ddlg-ish, corruption kink, horrible humor, female masturbation, carl helps out reader, mutual pining + "strictly friends" plot because i love that shit, nicknames like princess/baby/doll

(Carl is 18+ here, think S8/9) (he is alive in my mind 😻😻)

♡♡♡

perv!carl would 100% fr ong randomly grab you, like you'd be standing next to his chair at the table rambling about the first issue of some comic you found and wanting him to help you find the rest, and he keeps peeking at the hem of the tiny skirt you're wearing that keeps jumping up and down as you move excitedly, you're like "pleasepleaseplease you have to come with me and get the rest it ended on such a massive cliff- AAH" and hes looking at you like "ended on such a what?" with such an innocent face as if he didn't just shove his hand up your skirt and grab your upper thigh and ass in his big hand 😭 and you're just like "-hanger uh Carl what are you doing" and he starts groping at the flesh and so casually says "touching you princess, friends do that right?" knowing damn well you're thinking about stuff like holding hands or hugging

♡♡♡

perv!carl not letting you read the 18+ comics he has because "you're too sweet for this, its got naked people baby, can't let stuff like that pollute your pretty little head" 1, 2, 3...bingo "please? just wan see a little?" and he can't say no to your doe eyes- well i mean thats the reaction he wanted from you anyway- knew he was going to get. i think it goes without saying that you were swirming in his lap the whole time you read as he held the book and turned the pages for you, hot breath on the back of your neck and between your legs

♡♡♡

sitting on perv♡carls leg one day as you watch tv and hes writing down stuff you guys need at home and he absentmindedly starts bouncing the leg you're sitting on, you didn't really notice anything other than a tingly feeling at first and now you're gently rubbing your soaked pussy onto his jeans thanking God he wore black ones today struggling to not move too much so he doesn't see you acting like a bunny in heat. You're up off his lap as everything starts to feel warmer and fuzzy, too scared to know whats going to happen next, a little "'m sleepy, gonna go upstairs" as you wobbly at first walk run away into the shared bedroom and sit on the edge of your bed trying to will the feeling away. It doesn't help that Mr Eddie bear (EDDIE MUNSON REFERENCE???!??!?!?111!!11😱😱 *GONE WRONG* *POLICE CALLED*) your most beloved teddy is staring at you with his beady little eyes saying "hump me! hump me!" he wasn't doing that at all he was just looking at you and you thought of recreating your little activity with Carl onto him, he was right about the comics polluting your pretty head 😕

Carl didn't really hear your soft whimpers coming from upstairs, the hem of your tshirt you hapharzedly bit on muffling the sounds, but as he neared the door - he didn't mean to hear them, he just wanted his gun so he could get your comics for you - he hears your soft sobs coming through the tiny crack in the door which you didn't fully close. This man thinks your crying at first, goes over every single thing he did that day incase he was the cause of it but all of a sudden snapping out of that once he hears your aah and then a frustrated whine. He likes to think he didn't start palming himself over his jeans at the sight of you in your blush underwear with a little red bow and lace edges, white teeshirt soaking at the hem from your spit, messy hair framing your flushed face covered with a thin sheen of sweat. Small hands gripping into the comforter as you grinded your hips down onto Mr Eddie Bears poor, now soaked face, eyes squeezed shut under your furrowed eyebrows. He whimpers a little thinking hes never seen anything prettier, even in your feral state which he unknowingly caused, you're the most beautiful thing hes ever laid his eye(s) on. He then fingered you till you bit him and cried and then fell asleep on him afterward ☺☺

♡♡♡

perv!carl cumming in your underwear and making you wear it, loooooves watching you turn pink everytime you sit down and squirm feeling his warm fluids under you.

♡♡♡

Not perv!carl idk what to call thsi one😞 but Carl letting you shave his face, you're sitting on the bathroom counter with your tongue poked out and eyes squinting narrow as you drag the razor gently up his jaw. Hes holding your waist and watching you do this with so much concentration, loves your little whine and then giggle when he boops you, getting shaving cream onto your nose (sobbing qnd weeping)

♡♡♡

Sitting on Carls lap as he fingers you and you jerk him off, then lick his cum off your fingers while he looks at you flabbergasted, "tastes like ice cream" you say softly with a little giggle - you're gonna have to use your hands again -

♡♡♡

SLEEPING WITH HIM RAAAAHHHH hes the biggest softest warmest cuddlyest big perfect boy to cuddle with or just sleep on, I like to imagine lying on him like a ducking koala bear - legs on either side of his hips, arms around his neck and your face squished into his, hes got his arms around your waist holding you tight so you don't slip off (like thats even possible)

every now and then you rub your nose into his cheek like a cat, long gone into dreamland whispering his name among some other incoherent words

♡♡♡

Carl. Just Carl yes thats all, Carl

♡♡♡

Carl Monstercock Grimes fucking you missionary, your legs are hiked up and wrapped around his hips, one arm around his neck and the other lying limp like the rest of your body. Hes lying on top of you, keeping you down with his weight as he fucks in and out of you, hitting that one spot which makes you go all stupid over and over and over again, you're not even sure how long its been or how many times you've cum at this point. You can feel him so deep inside of you, literally no thoughts just Carl♡Carl♡Carl♡

♡♡♡

Carl making you suck his dick out in the open, your bare knees are on the rough pebbles getting rubbed raw as he fucks your face. He cums and you swallow it all and he picks you up off the ground to your feet like a little doll. Feelsbadman when he sees your cut up red and pink knees, makes you back against the wall as he gets onto his knees and kisses yours better - Now in his defense you shouldn't have worn a skirt he got a peak up of so easily - so technically he isn't to blame for your trembling thighs around his shoulders as you cum on his mouth and fingers 😊

---

sorry if this is much or you don't like these asks, i wont share if you dont wish to see these <33

OK BYEBYE SWEETIE, THANK YOU FOR DOING GODS WORK WITH THIS ACCOUNT HAVE A LOVELY DAY ILY BYEBYE 💗💗💗🐈‍⬛🦈🐈‍⬛🦈🐈‍⬛🦈

omg..why way i CACKELED AT THAT DUMBASS YOUTUBE TITLE OF EDDIE OAIRGOIERHGOEIRHGAERHG i fr needed a moment.

but DAMN cat shark, girl you really just wrote a whole ass book and dipped. I KNOW this has been in your head for a while LMAWEIFA

but this is amazing omg <3 thank you for taking the time to write this babes!! <3

#absolutely amazing queen #fanning myself rn #like omg bro BROOO that was so hawttttt #hehe ilysm <3 #🐈🦈anon

91 notes · View notes

itsdappleagain · 1 year

Text

THIS WEEK'S THE WEEK, FOLKS hopefully

IM GOING TO TRY TO CATHC UP ON CS WEEKLY AW YEAH!! ALRIGHT YOU KNOW WHAT THAT MEANS

IT'S TIME FOR THE CHASING PAPER CAPER!

(look how cool these stars are they actually are sharp!! i folded a few of them, look!)

highly recommend- super easy to do with just sticky notes

ANYWAY here we go!!! notes under the cut as usual <3

MAN i am late on this episode but i am soo excited for it!!!

maelstrom wins for worst eyebags

sdjjfd mael's like yeah 💅 perhaps I am a little deranged

mael's va put his pussy into saying "intellect"

everyone and their mother has made vile presentation power point jokes already so im not going to beat a dead horse but. yeah. thats so fucking funny

CLEO ROLLS HER EYES AT BRUNT TOO HAHAHA

this bitch i stg

the way she smacks that table when she says darn right. i do believe her. she is texas proud. she would hate abortion

i also like that the show uses brunt as a vessel for the american seven year olds watching this who also have no idea what the magna carta is. its cool

i had no idea there were seventeen original copies of the magna carta. i guess i should have guessed but i think im used to the constitu- never mind there are 13 copies of that too. okay well we're learning today

okay so i think the museum the magna cartas is in is the Chhatrapati Shivaji Maharaj Vastu Sangrahalaya?? it looks very similar

in style, if a little changed for the show. really cool! i guess they didnt want to have to try to pronounce the name though

law and disorder (svu theme chime)

stealing paper, yes. but have you considered that paper star also. folds and throws and destroys with that paper and is generally NOT great at keeping it intact

bark bark i love watching season 1 through a post-shadowsan reveal lens. he knows paper star IS a threat, unlike most of the other operatives, so he opposes the idea,,

love maelstrom just cutting shadowsan off with a vote. he's stealing the symbols of democracy so his colleagues cant keep skipping out on majority rules

there actually is a cafe on the museum grounds that isnt EXACTLY where carmen is sitting but is pretty close. cs team did their research with this one

some guy named john is so funny

player jumped from the very general "you can't be arrested for no reason" to "YOU CANT HAVE YOUR HORSE TAKEN AWAY FROM YOU" very quickly

well there isnt actually any "of the liberties" in the direct translation but alright

love how they have the english article "the" in the title of the magna cartas while talking about how its latin wheeze

rest in piece 3/4 turn views of the face. the carmen sandiego artstyle is beautiful until it has to neogotiate carmen not having a nose

interesting that the museum gets subtly lighted in green. we alll know what that means

i like the dramatic reveal of paper star but i also think. how did player not notice the security cams were already down

she had a lil choker

i love paper star so much. she's fantastic

she does make horse noises when she skips though, which is why jo likes her so much

yeah. paper star is so cool

hmmm

THEY HAVE NEVER WRITTEN A BETTER AND MORE DEFINING LINE IN THIS SHOW THAN "RED IS A SMART COLOR FOR YOU. IT WILL HIDE THE STAINS." WHAT THE FUCK THEY POPPED OFFF ON THAT LINE

SHE SAYS IT AND CARMEN CANT DO SHIT SHE JUST RUNS. CARMEN IS LITERALLY ON THE DEFENSIVE ALWAYS IN THIS FIGHT KSHFDSH ITS SO GOOD

you know shit is real when someone protects the face

i love how carmen puts her fists up to fight like a normal operative v carmen fight and then ps just pulls out the stars its so funny. its like the indiana jones scene when he just pulls out a gun

YES this fight is a challenge for carmen and i LOVE IT

LITERALLY WHAT COULD BE BETTER CARMEN ALMOST GETS STABBED IN THE NECK ITS GREAT. PAPER STAR IS A GREAT VILLAIN. YEAH

so glad kimiko glenn could voice her god she does such a good job

paper star used up the smear frame budget in this one scene alone

i love how carmen tries her quip and fight formula again and AGAIN paper star is like. no <3 i am going to rip you to shreds with this terrible pun i made up and carmen is SO OVER IT JSDHGHS

love how carmen didnt move like girlie what did you think she was going to do with those pamphlets

papertiger fans go wild

no way did that fucking tiger decapitate a stone statue what the fuck does she put in there knives??? paper star gives children razors in their halloween candy i guess

once again carmen's love for saving things that she has mostly already ruined causes her to have a disadvantage! it sure would suck if another falling statue at some point was weaponized. that would suck

LOOK AT THE GOUGES THOSE PAMPHLET STARS MADE WHAT THE FUCK

the cut hat staying there is so funny to me for some reason

dont try to be sneaky, carmen. just walk right up the center

the transitions with the tapestry and paperstar's folds are cool as fuck

HOW DID SHE GET UP THERE

also she disappears behind that second tapestry which means she was clinging onto the back of the fabric like a koala. good image

paper star: wraps carmen in a tapestry s4 evil carmen in the finale: hey that was a good idea. julia come here

paper star is the queerest bitch on the map at all times and i love her so much for that

laughing so hard imagining how many takes gina had to do of carmen's pained moaning as she struggles in the paper wrap

yeah. paper star. okay as if i haven't gushed about her enough she is. so good. the little mm-mm-mm! as carmen struggles. going against all of vile's ideals as she leaves traces EVERYWHERE and then pulls the fire alarm, not hiding in plain sight at all. she leaves carmen wrapped up for the cops. yeah. god. yeah

least favorite part of this episode of carmen being more upset about her hat than she is about losing The Fucking Magna Cartas and GOOD GRAVY SHE MOANS ABOUT THE HAT FOR SO LONG CARMEN YOU HAVE LIKE FIFTEEN

i love seeing the remains of the fight when acme steps in the next day!! you can track where paper star shot at carmen and then wrapped her up, where she was firing on the first floor, the different types of paper..

where did paper star put that glass circle she cut out

chase just randomly picks up evidence barehanded and then tosses it to the floor 2. fuck him fuck him straight to hell. so glad this is a pro-julia episode jhfashgdfa

all she does is romanticize the scoundrel it is all she CAN do

yeah acme is secret and not even their families know about it. but also every cop ever knows about it too okay

chase. thats it thats the post (i dont actually hate him. hes funny. but also insufferable at times. that is our wife you are slandering, sir)

i cant tell if i want to make a joke or a serious comment about how she's doing a finger gun at the image of carmen so i'll just leave it here

FULL OF LOVE AND AUTISM

chase: the only agent who has been face to face with her the train scene: i am about to ruin this whole man's career

HAH. says player. next on the news

(eda voice) look its an outdated human reference

why was le chevre up there. did he come down from the cliff face just for fun. or scale it just for fun. nevermind that checks out

the people in this show have ankles of steel they be dropping 20-30 feet and just fine with it

everyone tries to banter with paper star and she just. no

the shifty glance around from le chevre shdgkjsghd

the drop in her tone and face when she says he looks like he would get caught is so good

PIPPI PUNKSTOCKINGS

she is straight up torturing this guy how did paper star get past the censors

its like he was swinging his dick around in her face and going NOO NOT MY DICK PLEASE NOT MY DICK you are literally offering them as targets sir they are the closest thing to her

and from that day on fanfiction writers across the globe only called her tammy again

rOLL CREDITS /ref

oh i havent mentioned the music in this episode yet. its so good. yeah

the animation also is beautiful. the train is very nice w/ the reflections in the water

and then chase showed up to ruin her day

THE LITTLE tsk. ugh. SHE DOES IS SO FUNNY

i love how she's just humoring him he's not even in the realm of worth her full attention

honestly impressed by how chill chase is in the conversation? last time he was on a train with "her" he whipped off "her" hat and screamed in "her" face. then with ivy he jumped her snowmobile and triumphantly yelled at her again

he's just kind of like. yeah cool. im around carmen sandiego. we should have a lovely chat and then i shall get her to lead me calmly to the magna cartas. this could not possibly go wrong

love chase where did he think she was hiding them

awww theyre holding hands

criminal of this show to not show her kicking his ass in the tunnel it would have been soo funny

i love the little fakeout they do in the tunnel too. like omg did he cuff her??? no she used an uno reverse card

ALSO the little details of this show. before carmen says "or what? you'll cuff me?" she glances out the train window. she already has this scene so perfectly choreographed in her mind that she can just time the tunnel and make her escape its so good

acme keycard!!!! little did carmen know that pickpocketing that card would lead to coach brunt most of the way murdering her in a basement a few weeks from now

HERE WE GO YOU GUYS THE GAY SCENE OF ALL TIME

AGAIN julia is on her tablet gosh i dont know why i dont ever think of her as tech savvy but she is ALWAYS tapping on that thing

julia is so nice to her carmen just. sits dsgjagkdsh

THE WAY SORRY CAN YOU IMAGINE IF SOME RANDO HOT LADY SAT DOWN ACROSS FROM YOU WITH NO PERMISSION AND THEN JUST WENT PARTNER 🤨🤨🤨🤨???? AT YOU WHEN YOU MENTIONED THE WORD LIKE SHE WAS DOING HER MAKEUP (so it seemed) AND SHE JUST. DROPPED EVERYTHING

is the plausible reason that "partner" set off cop warnings in carmen's head? yes. but is the gay reason that she wanted to make sure she wasn't about to flirt with some poor married woman? also yes is the gay response to this gay reason julia canonically going "NO GOD IM NOT WITH HIM WITH HIM"? yes and yes!!

THE IMMEDIATE JULES GOD

julia puts down her tablet and gives her FULL attention to carmen to talk about the taj mahal,,, yeahh....

ALSO i enjoy how carmen maneuvers the conversation. she asks julia's name and then immediately asks an engaging question afterward so that julia doesn't think to ask for HER name...

love how julia leans forward to talk to carmen augh...she is so engaged and relaxed

that line is so fucking iconic. the Eyes she's giving. the lean. she loves history even more. the fucking setup for way down in season 4

HAHAAAA JULIA PICKS UP ON THAT LITTTLE TINY CLUE CARMEN DROPS HER SO FAST AND I LOVE THAT SO MUCH...THE WAY SHE JUST IMMEDIATELY SITS UP AND HER BRAIN GOES wait a minute something about that remark wasn't right YEAH...YEAH YEAH YEAH

AND THEN SHE JUST STANDS UP OUT OF SHOCK ONCE SHE REALIZES WHO SHE JUST CHATTED WITH HEHEHE

god i honestly think that if chase hadn't been putting her down and scoffing at her interests and making her stay behind at crime scenes she would have gone after carmen. can you IMAGINE how different the episode would have been if she'd gone after her???? GOD (i can imagine....i have imagined....the polycule has done....a LOT of imagining...)

that liiiittle glance behind that carmen does to see if julia is following her before she starts focusing on paper star..

man i NEVER used to be able to figure out how paper star sensed carmen peeking around the corner but i realized about a year ago that she saw her reflection in the window...AUGH the little details of this show are so good

THE WAY CARMEN JUST POUNCES ON HER IS SO FUNNY

that gay little roll. paper star makes every fight just a little gay actually. now kiss

those shoes must have hurt so bad to get kicked with ow

second toilet paper joke of the episode. laugh.

i love the pro-environment message this episode was halfheartedly trying to juggle. it did not come across fantastically

the way paper star's eyes light up when she sees new paper is great

PAPER STAR'S THEME IS SO GOOOD....HOW SHE JUST. she just goes. "you should run." somehow she's the most campy villain and the most down-to-earth serious threat could and would kill you villain in the show and she rocks both at once

paper star is vaccuming her

you also know shit gets real when the background turns into a mass of colored streaks

i ALSO love about paper star that she can and does hold her own in hand-to-hand. yeah she's bet with her stars but she can pack a punch or a kick

TELL ME HOW CARMEN NABBED THAT CASE IN THE MILLISECOND BETWEEN PAPER STAR GRABBING THE PAPERS AND DRAWING BACK

carmen: yes i do think i will run now

i also like this fight because we don't often get to see carmen fighting when she's not in her trench coat. it gives it a much more sporadic, caught-off-guard feel to the whole thing somehow- which is again a trademark of paper star!! she doesn't do things like everyone else

something about the way carmen sprints to the end of the train and then turns around is so fucking funny. yes that is the last car! congratulations! its a good thing you came up here instead of trapping yourself in the interior of the last car I guess

rock paper scissors wind

THE FLIP OVER THE SHOULDER GAY STARE IS ALSO ICONIC AND SUCH A GOOD MOVE. carmen initiated it but fuck if she knows what she's going to do afterwards

ill say it again and a fcuking gain how much i like how much of a threat paper star is. yes girl. fling her off the train not once (sort of) but twice. carmen was an inch away from falling headfirst off that train and she knew it

i am not sure how exactly carmen pulled herself up from a lean by grabbing paper star's boobs and pulling her towards her but im good with it. also look at this animation she is desperate!! yess!!!!!! EMOTION!!!!

AND LEGO HANDS!!!!

now KISS

OBSESSED WITH HOW STRONG PAPER STAR IS WHEEZE SHE JUST F L I N G S CARMEN OFF THE SIDE. HER FEET ARE OFF THE FLOOR. BYE

the couple not even looking up from the newspaper is so funny

i love the broken physics of that vent(?) cover (?) throw its extremely entertaining to watch

carmen's triumph motif playing and then cutting to paper star just hanging there while a crow squawks at her is very funny. she just looks at it. i would like to think she makes friends with it. she does like murder

"agent devineaux??" "mnyeh.."

AND SHE DELIVERS THE MAGNA CARTAS TO HERRRR

good hands :))))

i love that she doesn't even need to say anything. we are just left to understand that paper star did end up one-upping her here in the end, and its this moment that nearly kills both her and chase

sassypants

i like the contrast of brunt and cleo shielding themselves when she throws the card, versus maelstrom standing and not flinching. he knows her better than they do

damn

i thought that was a vase theyre just his pants

HEHEE GOD THATS A GOOD EPISODE. yeah. yeah. okay

thats all i have to say for this one. other than the french connections caper this is my favorite episode in season 1!!

#carmen sandiego #cs weekly #csweekly

45 notes · View notes

twinknote · 8 months

Note

top 5 meronia headcanons.......

FINALLY POSTING THIS ty for bearing w me anon!!!

housewife mello and spoiled princess near

mello is the domestic daddy of the relationship. he does the cooking, cleaning, and general house stuff. he genuinely enjoys having his routines and he's also just unwilling to live in squalor after sharing a room with matt growing up <- guy whose idea of cleaning is shoving everything into a closet/under the bed. near isn't necessarily incapable of doing these things, but let's be real. the man is a princess. i imagine he does do some cleaning when mello asks him for help and that he also does other things like paying bills and budgeting.

russian mello and french-canadian near

ok listen. i know some of you think that russian mello is overdone. HEAR ME OUT THO. first, statistically speaking, the surname keehl is most popular in russia, aside from the u.s. (1) and mihael (михаил) is also an extremely common russian name. aside from all that, he just truly strikes me as Such a russian (<- guy who is russian and also has a degree in russian and spent 4 years studying the language and culture) like between his no nonsense, independent, standoffish nature and his long blonde hair and sharp features? soooo russian coded imo

and as for near, to be fair, canada has around the 12th densest population of the surname river (2) but it does have both english and french origins-- "rivers" seeming to be more french-coded, but immigration loves to fuck up ppl's names to be fair (3) i have less evidence for near being french-canadian but i think it's cute and since morgan put this concept in my brain it has lived there rent free

near having the power to dom mello

we all know that on the outside, mello's a dominant power-hungry bitch. HOWEVER. a lot of the time those kinds of people fantasize about releasing power and letting someone else take the reins. and we also all know how obsessed this man has always been with near (for better or for worse). i fully believe that with the right tone of voice, near could tell mello to sit and bark like a dog and he would. not to mention uhh other acts. know what i'm saying?

mello never hated near. he hated himself.

it was never about mello being better than near or truly disliking him. it was always about mello's lack of self-esteem, security, and faith in himself. he felt like he needed to prove something, he felt like his inferiority to near was like a flashing neon light to everyone in the world and for that reason, he was like This dude Sucks and i'm so much better than him. and then he grows up a little and actually has accomplishments of his own that he feels proud of and creates security for himself so his nervous system is able to calm down and actually recognize that near had always been one of his closest friends and one of the people he related to and looked up to the most.

matt is an integral part of their dynamic.

listen. don't hate me bc i'm right. whether it's in a romantic or platonic capacity, matt has something that near and mello do not-- the combined power of realistic non-deranged observation and communication skills. he is the one they go to (esp mello bc yk they're besties) when they get into a fight and can't even figure out wtf they're fighting about. mello comes over in a shit mood and matt pours him a drink, listens to him vent, and gives him a much needed dose of reality and sound advice. and if we're talking about nearlymellodramattic, he is the glue of the relationship. mello is hotheaded and near is socially inept most of the time. matt is the goofy jester moderator of the relationship, keeping the gears oiled and helping everyone to communicate their feelings.

#TY FOR ASKING <3 #feel free to expand or refute my claims #ask #meronia #dn

13 notes · View notes

justalilguyoops · 2 months

Note

Hi! I love your fics and I truly adore your characterization of Felix! My question is, do you think canon!Felix is that much of an airhead? I mean we know that he's seen doing shit like showing his doodles to his cousin grinning like it was the most amusing thing in the world, and we've seen him just sit under a tree with his broken bike hoping(!) for a higher being to maybe save his ass(?) etc etc. But -and this question might seem really ignorant (I'm sorry!) but I'm not familiar with the west's educational system at all - aren't you supposed to be smart to be accepted to Oxford? Or at least have the grades to show up for it? I mean I know Felix's family is important and all and maybe Catton donations are a Thing, but I was under the impression that he wouldn't be completly academically helpless. Like farleigh for example. He seems be intellectually very capable albeit admittedly, he grew up in different circumstances so he probably had show that he deserved what was given to him (although he did get expelled from multiple schools for his deranged behavior lol) Anyways! Love airheaded Felix with all my heart! And I love you for your genius writing!!

OMG hello anon!!! thank you for the question I'm always so shook when I get questions like this because I'm like,,,, people care what I think?? omg.....so I am very honored

SO! I think canon Felix is NOT an airhead, or at least not as much of an airhead as LAWS Felix is. I think WIPIP Felix is probs WAY closer to actual Felix.

I def think he's probably the level of stupid your average college boy is HAHAHA which means he's not....stupid....just dumb.....AKA I think he's probably just immature, cocky, and has never had to try that hard to get anything he's ever wanted.

Oxford is DEFINITELY hard to get into and you need good grades. I'm American (so obvi UK folks def probs know more about this than me), but I view it how we view the Ivy League, which are like our most prestigious universities and super hard to get into. BUT. There is a caveat that gives you an advantage in getting into these schools: Legacy students. I'm pretty sure this isn't as much of a thing for Oxford (just telling from looking it up) and it's more of an American practice, but to put it simply is that if your parent attended said university, you get a bit of an advantage for admissions. Yeah. Isn't that gross???

SO I kind of think about it that way: Sir James probably attended Oxford and they probably made some hefty donations, giving Felix a bit more leeway than most admissions would get. I think Felix probably has gotten pretty good grades when he tries, but I also think he gets away with a LOT more than an average student. Some nepo baby privilege fr fr. We also learn he's running late for his tutorial and SKIPPED the week prior from the whole bike scene, so just using that as a reference kind of tells us he's not the ~best~ student. I def think he's probably pretty smart though, just privileged and lazy.

And then Farleigh, on the other hand, I think DOES have to try. Even though he's supported by the Cattons, I don't think he benefits from the same privilege as the Cattons.

But LAWS Felix.......he is such a himbo.........true Gen Z'er who has no attention span because of TikTok (I say this as a Gen Z'er).....I don't think he's stupid, just that he kinda gets by in Oxford. For his grades before Oxford, I think he probably got a lot of little grade "bumps" from teachers. BUT I also think that maybe he gets accommodations? Here in the USA, if you have dyslexia or dyscalculia or other learning disorders you get a bit more leeway with testing and whatnot. By leeway I mean additional time, rooms where you test alone, etc. For LAWS Felix I have the canon of Felix dealing with Dyslexia/Dyscalculia/ADHD. He's fr trying his best my poor boy

BUT OBVIOUSLY all of this is just my opinion and what I think!!! I'm also an American, so a lot of my info is based on my experience in the American education system. Thank you so much for the question <333

#kisses you anon #thank you for the question!! hopefully this made sense #justalilguyoops answers

2 notes · View notes

sturmhondsdemjin · 8 months

Text

Four part one

That night, as Alex stares into the cold, pitiless eyes of a prehistoric beast of prey, he has a few regrets.

THEY KNOW, he texts Henry. THEY KNOW I HAVE ROBBED THEM OF FIVE-STAR ACCOMMODATIONS TO SIT IN A CAGE IN MY ROOM, AND THE MINUTE I TURN MY BACK THEY ARE GOING TO FEAST ON MY FLESH.

I think he’s cute, Henry responds.

that’s because you can’t hear all the menacing gobbling

Yes, famously the most sinister of all animal sounds, the gobble.

“You know what, you little shit,” Alex says the second the call connects, “you can hear it for yourself and then tell me how you would handle this—”

“Alex?” Henry’s voice sounds scratchy and bewildered across the line. “Have you really rung me at three o’clock in the morning to make me listen to a turkey?”

“Yes, obviously,” Alex says. He glances at Cornbread and cringes. “Jesus Christ, it’s like they can see into your soul. Cornbread knows my sins, Henry. Cornbread knows what I have done, and he is here to make me atone.”

“Oh, I fucking hate you!” Alex shouts as Henry laughs at his own idiotic prank, and his indignant flailing startles a loud gobble out of Cornbread, which in turn startles a very unmanly scream out of Alex. “Goddammit! Did you hear that?”

“Sorry, what?” Henry says. “I’ve been stricken deaf.”

“You’re such a dick,” Alex says. “Have you ever even been turkey hunting?”

“Alex, you can’t even hunt them in Britain.”

Alex returns to his bed and face-plants into a pillow. “I hope Cornbread does kill me.”

“No, all right, I did hear it, and it was … proper frightening,” Henry says.

“You couldn’t just go sleep somewhere else? Aren’t there a thousand rooms in that house?”

“Okay, but, uh, what if they escape? I’ve seen Jurassic Park. Did you know birds are directly descended from raptors? That’s a scientific fact. Raptors in my bedroom, Henry. And you want me to go to sleep like they’re not gonna bust out of their enclosures and take over the island the minute I close my eyes? Okay. Maybe your white ass.”

“I’m really going to have you offed,” Henry tells him. “You’ll never see it coming. Our assassins are trained in discretion. They will come in the night, and it will look like a humiliating accident.”

“Autoerotic asphyxiation?”

“Toilet heart attack.”

“Jesus.”

“You’ve been warned.”

“I thought you’d kill me in a more personal way. Silk pillow over my face, slow and gentle suffocation. Just you and me. Sensual.”

“Ha. Well.” Henry coughs.

“Anyway,” Alex says, climbing fully up onto the bed now. “It doesn’t matter because one of these goddamn turkeys is gonna kill me first.”

“What are you even doing right now?”

“What am I doing? I was trying to sleep.”

“Okay, but you’re eating Jabba Cakes, so.”

“Jaffa Cakes, my God,” Henry says. “I’m having my entire life haunted by a deranged American Neanderthal and a pair of turkeys, apparently.”

“Alex,” Henry says firmly.

“What?”

“The turkeys are not going to Jurassic Park you,” he says. “You’re not the bloke from Seinfeld. You’re Jeff Goldblum. Go to sleep.”

Alex bites down a smile that feels bigger than the sentence has truly earned. “You go to sleep.”

[Image ID: a screenshot from Red, White & Royal Blue by Casey McQuiston. It is a text thread between Alex and Henry that reads

HRH Prince Dickhead poop emoji

Dec 8, 2019, 8:53 PM

yo there's a bond marathon on and did you know your dad was a total babe

HRH Prince Dickhead poop emoji I BEG YOU TO NOT

End ID]

#sturmhond reads #red white and royal blue #history huh? bet we could make some (book)#cornbread knows what i have done (book)

5 notes · View notes

mermaidsirennikita · 2 years

Note

Historical romance book recs with the best dirty talk?

Oooh, great question.

Sarah MacLean is great. You can tell that she has a passion for writing dirty talk, and honestly, shouldn't we all? Being able to appreciate dirty talk for what it is--just weird shit you say in the moment to go with a vibe--rather than overanalyzing it, is what separates the children from the adults, imo.

Standouts include:

One Good Earl Deserves A Lover--Theeee dirty talk historical romance. The most famous sex scene in the book (and maybe the most famous sex scene MacLean has written) is the hero talking the heroine through touching herself on a chair while he just watches. Because he's sworn to celibacy and doesn't want to despoil her. It's a lot.

Heartbreaker--Yeah, this one has really good dirty talk. Adelaide really doesn't talk dirty (and neither does Pippa in the above example, tbh, and I wish there were more romance heroines in general who talked back) but Clayborn has it covered. It's Praise Kink: The Book.

Devil in Winter by Lisa Kleypas actually has some pretty good dirty talk in the first sex scene especially, which I don't see discussed a lot in relation to this book. Maybe it's just me, but "That's right, obey your husband" makes quite an impression. Lisa loves instructive, daddy dirty talk, which is why Helen and Rhys's first sex scene in Marrying Winterborne is narrated by him explaining what they're doing. Some hate that. I do not.

When He Was Wicked by Julia Quinn is another "well actually" one. I generally don't find Quinn's books very sexy, but she went off in this one. I really like the scene where he's taunting her by fingering her and demanding that she marry him if she wants to finish, but that's just meeee.

Duke of Midnight by Elizabeth Hoyt. I think that for the mainstream... Sarah MacLean writes the best dirty talk, and don't get me wrong, it's exquisite dirty talk. For my wretched, horrible, bleeding heart that sees a psychotic man and goes "yes", this one is the winner. He just weaves such a tale. Truly deranged. TAKE MY COME FOR IT'S ALL I CAN GIVE YOU????

The Earl I Ruined by Scarlett Peckham has a dom earl, who at one point sits back and talks the heroine through masturbating with an apple. More effective than you'd think!

The Bride Goes Rogue by Joanna Shupe has another "talking her through masturbating" scene, but it's in a carriage. I believe they also talk dirty to each other throughout as she calls him her king and she's his reinette and shit like that. They're lightly kinky. I think I remember her novellas My Dirty Duke and Sold to the Duke having good dirty talk.

I'm not done with When A Girl Loves an Earl by Elisa Braden yet, but I'm really enjoying the dirty talk in that one. Say what you will, but there's just something about a Scottish hero deeply leaning into his Scottishness and being like "WHOSE ENGLISH PUSSY IS GONNA TAKE THIS SCOTTISH COCK" (not a quote, but it should be).

Never forget Any Duchess Will Do when he bends her over a table and makes her recite his courtesy titles while he fucks her.

#romance novel blogging #book recs

15 notes · View notes

stormyoceans · 1 year

Note

how do i make p'x recreate archer scene from mock trailer in our skyy2? something about is so.. and image it but with puentalay who was friends and dated for so long and in each other's veins basically... and with the amount of derangement in their brains i can imagine them making insane bets like whoever score more points is pillow princess today :))

[SLIDES MONOPOLY MONEY ACROSS THE TABLE TOWARDS P’X] SO ABOUT THAT ARCHERY SCENE

literally cannot think about that damn scene for longer than a second or i start climbing the walls and spinning counterclockwise on the ceiling screaming like imagine coming up with such effervescent impeccable incomprehensible levels of sexiness tension and style and then simply deciding to deprive the world of one of the most game changing moments in television history……

P’X THOU ART A CRUEL SELFISH AND CAPRICIOUS GOD BUT IT'S NOT TOO LATE TO REDEEM YOURSELF!!!!!!

it wouldn't even be that hard to add a similar scene in the our skyy special tbh like.. from the bts pics we got i think it's pretty clear that the episode is gonna take place some years after the show ended, and maybe puen has retired from being an actor to become a full time screenwriter by then, but let's say his last movie included a scene where he had to shoot an arrow, so he and talay decided to set up a target to help him practice at home and even after puen was done with the shooting they never bothered taking the target down and eventually it just ended up becoming a permanent fixture in their yard (it's not like it's even bothering anyone or taking up too much space considering THEY COULD PROBABLY FIT AN ENTIRE GOLF COURSE IN THAT FREAKING YARD LIKE SRSLY HAVE YOU SEEN THE SHEER SIZE OF THAT PLACE?????)

and towards the end of the episode we could have them sitting outside and reminiscing about those years in-between that we didn't get to see and at one point the archery target comes up and they start teasing each other until they make a bet like the one in episode 3: the winner can make the loser do anything (because like you said they're deranged just like that and time only made them WORSE). and if anyone is tempted to think that since they're already together the whole thing isn't gonna be particularly charged then THEY SHOULD THINK AGAIN BECAUSE I AGREE WITH YOU THE FACT THAT PUEN AND TALAY HAVE BEEN TOGETHER FOR YEARS WOULD ACTUALLY MAKE IT ALL THE MORE DELICIOUS!!!!! like puen stepping close to talay to help him shoot until they're lined up front to back is very much deliberate!!!! and so is the way puen's hands slide down talay's arms to adjust his position, making every hair on talay's body stand up in response. and the arrow does end up on the target but it's way off center, so puen is very confident in his victory when he takes the bow from talay, but while he's aiming talay gets behind him and lightly blows some air on his neck which is enough to distract puen and make him miss the target completely

and talay looks so proud of himself and puen is smiling because it's not like he can deny talay anything anyway so he says 'what do you want me to do then' and since talay is a little shit he probably answers something like 'do laundry for a week' but when puen accuses him to not be romantic at all talay says 'then what about this', then he takes puen's hand, writes something on it with his finger and walks back into the house as a very confused puen tries to figure out what he wrote. hint: the episode ends with puen running after talay to pick him up and carry him to bed

ANYWAY PERSONAL DELUSIONS ASIDE WE NEED THE ARCHERY SCENE TO HAPPEN IN ANY WAY SHAPE OR FORM PLEASE P'X WE'RE BEGGING

#this is a mess and there are probably so many mistakes in it ;;;;;#like i know the verb tenses are allover the place but i rewrote some parts way too many times and i can't seem to be able to fix them ;;;;;#also love and light to anyone actually reading my ramblings you are god's strongest soldier #and you deserve all the good things in the world #im never beating the 'cannot shut up about vice versa' allegations #puentalay #m: ask

4 notes · View notes

gothprentiss · 2 years

Text

sorry for the long post but when i was in undergrad i worked nights doing security at the dorms and i'd sit there at my widdle secuwity workew desk (they only remembered we needed active shooter training in my final semester on the job) and watch criminal minds and all the british comedy shows that have like 1 million seasons on youtube and forged in fire. did this thru two senior theses, phd apps, etc. haven't gotten back into forged in fire yet because that does require me to be late night deranged but recently the other two are most of what i watch rn and it's been kind of wild and sweet.

like, criminal minds is funny bc i do, if prompted, think it is genuinely like... not soul destroying, but a distant cousin of that, kind of meaningless in its emptiness, but it's also where i go to hang out all the time. obviously i don't not care about it, it's commanded.... years of my attention, a pretty small amount of my money, and over 100k words (JESUS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!) from me. it's probably where i've done most of my formative "creative" writing, and it's where i've worked out a lot of my understanding of what i value in media, and what interests me beyond the level of execution. also like, i won't pretend that i wasn't watching s3 while writing grad apps as an entire adult 21 year old like... it's just you and me against the world, emily prentiss! i am ultimately better for it, even if i would absolutely rather go live in the woods than admit to anyone irl that this is the shit i get up to.

or idk, i was watching 8 out of 10 cats does countdown the saturday after saint patrick's day which my fool ass thought would be calm but was the true saint patrick's day and someone puked in the elevator and everyone who came in after that event heard me, with their own ears, say, with my own mouth, me who Manned The Gates Of The Building, that the elevator was uninhabitable, and still tried it, and to the man lurched drunkenly into it and then lurched drunkenly out and was like "oh you were right" and i was like wow, sean lock, it is just you and me against the world right now. and then i'd been watching it again last summer when i learned he died. just like... things stay with you! old familiar friends you can never see fresh again!

#not sure what this is i'm just in a mood #death cw /#texpost #might delete later just.... mysterious vibes this morning #making a tumblr in june 2022? not good for the soul

3 notes · View notes

subbyenbywitch · 2 years

Text

[movie review] halloween ends (2022)? more like my patience ends

there’s not sticking the landing and then there’s teetering & flailing for a frankly uncomfortably long time before flopping straight on your face, and the halloween legacyquels opt quite decisively for the latter.

i spent the first half or so of halloween ends thinking, “okay, i sort of see what they’re setting up, i’m not sure i like it but i guess we’ll see what they do with it” and i kept waiting. and kept waiting. and kept waiting. and it became increasingly clear that they weren’t going to “do” anything with any of this, it was just sort of stuff happening, man.

like, in basically every technical aspect of filmmaking this movie is beyond competent, so it’s easy to be lulled into thinking it’s a perfectly serviceable movie by its solid moment-to-moment entertainment factor, but it just doesn’t add up to anything.

despite never really “losing interest” per se, i turned on this movie hard about halfway through it when i realized it was just thoroughly wasting my time, and subjecting me to plenty of unpleasant bullshit in the process. all while acting like it was a Serious movie with Things To Say.

you know what would’ve actually made a good ending? the first movie in this reboot sequel trilogy. like i know the filmmakers swear up & down that this was always intended as a trilogy, but it just super doesn’t feel like it? halloween 2018 was a resoundingly good ending for this franchise, and then they made two more.

(spoilers & cw: racism, lynching, politics)

you might remember that i thought the second movie was actually super good when it was just trying to be a dumb slasher movie but thoroughly awful when it was trying to Say Stuff. this is like they just made an entire fucking movie out of the bad parts of the second movie.

the closest i came to thinking it was all worth it and we were getting a good movie was when corey woke up to find laurie sitting in a chair and she gave him one last chance to stop the path he was on, and warned him that she was going to defend herself and (especially) her granddaughter with whatever force she needed to. in isolation this was a signature moment for laurie, showing us exactly how much of a stone cold badass she’d become over the years.

i’m frustrated on allyson’s behalf that the femboy who cheated on her was apparently far & away the best person she’s ever dated, considering she followed him with a cop and fucking michael myers jr.

i’m doing absolutely zero research to back this up, but the impression i got from directly reading the film was that corey & michael’s relationship was meant to be some kind of clumsy allegory for the way disaffected working class white guys have been radicalized by fucking donald trump & fox news, and when i say it was a clumsy allegory i mean clumsy.

again i may be overthinking this, but it really clicked for me when they were parading myers’ body through the streets like some fucking deranged dictator does to his political enemies and then fed him to a woodchipper that this is fucking exactly what the democrats think they did by beating trump in an election. laurie starts talking about how “now haddonfield can heal,” and we see allyson moving out of town which she & laurie should’ve done IMMEDIATELY after the second movie, fucking HELL.

look i’m not even getting into the weeds here, guys. and those weeds are fucking thick with shit like unexamined racism. like you bring the black cop from the second movie back so he can rubber stamp them lynching michael, presumably because someone along the way realized that was kinda a little uncomfy. but you give him exactly zero lines???

every single other black character in this movie is super victim blamey or a conspiracy theorist, and for the crime of being kinda annoying i guess? that one black radio dj gets the most brutal murder in the entire movie and for added thematic flourish his fucking tongue gets cut out? and spins on the record making it skip? and just… are you kidding me with this shit? you have really no idea how bad of a look that is?

or how about the fact that allyson’s nurse coworker who gets promoted over her just has to be depicted having an affair with their doctor boss? and they have to go out of their way to make her seem like the bad guy as much as he is, and not have it be pretty fucking clear that he is clearly the asshole in this situation? and also she gets the more dramatic & brutal murder out of the two of them?

just. fuck, guys. this is a spiteful movie. i kind of just genuinely hate it.

and having the triumphant ending of the damn movie be a public defilement of a dead body, no matter what michael myers is guity of, is just wild. like, this is one of the few things that basically everyone, everywhere agrees is pretty fucked up, and we’re acting like it’s some kind of resoundingly triumphant moment?

this should have ended with the first movie. i was wrong at the beginning of this review. well, not wrong exactly, but i left some things out. what this series did was stick the landing perfectly, then go “oh shit i have two whole movies left to go,” hop back onto whatever gymnastics equipment it was using in this metaphor, do some awkward flips & shit, and then fall flat on its face like i said earlier.

what a complete waste of everyone’s time.

c-rank

#reviews #movie review #movies #halloween #halloween movie #halloween ends #cw: racism

0 notes

lebenspurpur · 3 years

Note

What about how would slashers propose their s/o? :3

How would the slashers propose:

Michael Myers

Michael wouldn't.

As funny as that sounds, I'm pretty sure Michael doesn't understand marriage and its concept at all.

After all.. who'd marry you? A deranged serial killer and his spouse.. pretty difficult to find a priest for that kind of couple.

If anything, he'd propose to show that he cares. Michael isn't the best at showing emotions and a proposal would be his personal way of showing that he does adore you.

It would probably be nothing big though. He'd just hand you a stolen ring and then march off, leaving you alone with your confusion.

Are you ever getting married? Probably not but he'll wear a ring similar to yours if you'd like.

Vincent Sinclair

Oh, Vincent will try his hardest to be as romantic as he can be.

Dozen of candles, hundreds of roses, and he'll actually wear an old suit he found in Bo's wardrobe!

His brothers will be out of town, driven out by your big lover.

He'll make dinner for you. It might taste a little interesting, considering his below-average cooking skills, but hey the idea alone is so adorable.

After dinner, he'll sink down on one knee and you just freeze.

He's super nervous too! What if you don't want to marry him? What if he's too fast and you're not ready for that commitment yet?

The ring will be from a victim but he polished and perfected it himself. He'll design it like his knives, dragons wrapping around the gemstone in the middle.

As soon as that "yes" leaves your lips, he inflates, probably ready to pass out.

Bo Sinclair

Bo.. doesn't necessarily want to marry.

But he wants to spend the rest of his life with you, that's for sure.

You're something he doesn't deserve and yet you're here, with him.

Bo won't be as romantic as his twin, that's not really his strategy.

He'll most likely blurt out his proposal while he's watching TV and make it seem like the most normal thing ever, even though he's frightened on the inside.

If you ask him what he said, he'll repeat it real quietly and you swear he's turning red.

Say yes and Bo will actually flash a big grin, a real one, not his usual smirk, finally pulling you closer to seal his lips with yours.

He can't believe someone would marry him but you wanted to, and he'd always deem that a miracle.

Lester Sinclair

Oh god, Lester will be so nervous.

He has everything: the ring, a nice suit, a romantic dinner but what if he fucks it up?

He even wrote a note containing a few words of his "speech" so he won't forget it.

So it's after dinner and he kneels down, nearly tripping on his open shoelace, and.. uh fuck what'd he want to say???

He can't find his note! Lester is now panicking.

Your reassuring smile grounds him again and he somehow manages to finish his proposal without fainting. How? Lester doesn't know, he has no recollection of what happened.

The ring will be from a victim but he got Vincent to make it prettier. He feels really bad about it as well, please tell him that that's okay!

Baby Firefly

Oh, Marriage? A big, pretty white dress? Sign her the fuck up.

Okay, being with you for the rest of her life is really nice as well.

She's probably talking to Mama when the subject first emerges and she just freezes in excitement.

She's soon skipping down the stairs, calling out your name.

"Y/N LET'S GET MARRIED!"

You don't even have a choice, she will marry you whether you like it or not.

I doubt that she'll even ask you the question, it'll just be a determined "We're getting married." and she's gone again, probably planning for the wedding.

A ring will be there though. She probably stole it but oh well.

Otis Driftwood

Marriage? *Insert him scoffing.*

Yeah no, he's too edgy for that.

However, he is down to invent his own kind of marriage for you.

But you're not getting a ring, oh no.

Otis is showing up with a collar. And it has his name on it.

After he's given it to you, he'll just hold a 15-minute speech about how you belong to him and how this collar will show everyone.

If you say yes afterward he'll be confused. This wasn't a question.

Billy Loomis

Oh Billy has it all planned out... and it can go both ways.

It's either a super romantic, high-school sweetheart-like proposal with flowers, a cute ring, balloons, and all that boring stuff or...

He dresses up as Michael Myers and jumps out at you, scaring you to death, just to hold a ring and propose to you.

I can see him totally scaring the shit out of you the whole evening just to make your proposal a special one.

Stu also helps him which makes you question which of the two you're really marrying.

Stu Macher

Stu will propose in his own way, to be frank, everything he does is done in his own way.

He'll be quite sweet actually, taking you out on a Ferris wheel to ask the question.

He's serious about the whole thing but he doesn't quite show it.

He makes it seem as if this whole thing does nothing to him so you can't see how nervous he is.

After you say yes he'll still act cool but the shake in his voice gives him away.

If you cry, he'll tease you for years so be careful.

Brahms Heelshire

The only idea Brahms has of proposal and marriage is from the books he's read. And those are either porn magazines or some old romance novels from way before our time.

He'll wear a suit. You don't even know where he got it from, it's astonishingly old.

There's no dinner or anything, Brahms can't cook and after all, that's your job.

He'll give you flowers though!

And his grandmother's proposal ring that he found somewhere in the mansion. He just can't buy his own so he has to improvise.

If you say yes he'll smile excitedly and jump into your arms. He's not getting off too, you have to carry him now.

Sometimes he forgets how tall he is.

Thomas Hewitt

Thomas will marry you pretty early into the relationship.

After all, his family is very religious and you know what they say, no sex before marriage kids. I doubt that Thomas will obey that rule but let's pretend-

Luda will help him with everything he needs, she'll even get Hoyt and Monty to leave the house with her for a night so you two have some privacy!

Thomas will be very nervous and you very confused. Thomas never stopped working unless it was something important.

You'll eat and have a nice time, you can finally spend some time with your lover and this time, not in the basement. He even takes his mask off, just for you.

After dinner he'll clear his throat and actually say the whole proposal out loud. This is important and Thomas doesn't want to ruin this just because he doesn't want to talk.

He could never ruin anything but he's insecure like that.

If you say yes he's going to grin brightly and just pick you up, spinning you around until he actually kisses you, once again feeling so grateful for you in his life.

Josef

Marriage isn't that important to him so he takes a while to even think about that idea.

Of course, a life filled with you is absolutely amazing in his opinion but he trusts that you won't leave him, with or without a promise binding you to him.

After a bit of thinking, he decides to do it just for the gesture.

He'll buy a ring that he thinks fits and then plan a nice dinner with a few candles, red wine, expensive food, all that shit.

Josef is an amazing cook so that food will be to die for.

After eating, he'll intertwine your hands with his and look into your eyes, quietly bringing up the whole idea of marriage.

If you seem interested and I mean positively interested, he'll pull out the ring, surprising you like always.

Say yes and Josef will get quite emotional, never did he think someone would actually marry him.

He might cry but one word about that and you'll get the silent treatment.

you'll get a gif, as a treat

Amanda Young

Marriage? Uh, not for her.

Amanda hates the whole idea of marriage, stupid love-sick couples marrying just to break up and divorce a year later, leaving children to grow up in an environment that's shaped by isolation and abandonment.

However, she's not against a ring to show that she's never going to leave you.

Amanda will make one for you, yes you heard me, make.

It's so important to her, anyone else but her would fail her.

It takes a while but seeing your happy tears after she gave and explained it to you makes everything worth it.

She'll often admire it, sitting so perfect on your finger.

You're hers and hers alone.

You can't see it but she's smiling.

#slashers headcannons #slashers x reader #michael myers x reader #vincent sinclair x reader #bo sinclair x reader #lester sinclair x reader #baby firefly x reader #otis driftwood x reader

468 notes · View notes

larentsaloud · 2 years

Text

thyme being unhinged

thyme’s most savage moments

preamble:

so this post is for those who are able to distinguish between a fictional character and real life. we don’t condone violence here. we don’t accept thyme x ren x gorya hate. this compilation is to commemorate the most savage thyme moments we love to hate.

in no particular order:

thyme beating the **** out of his classmate. but what was really chilling was his explanation behind it. he offers his “followers” opportunity to destroy others at no cost. no repercussions. this deranged moment has it all. animal print. thick gangsta neck chain, messy bed hair, scrumptious lips. disdain. contempt. brutal.

(side bar this shot, the first introduction to f4 is spectacular. to the far left, ren adjusting his blazer, the slightly opened white shirt. everyone in uniforms. they are not. thyme being the ring leader you can just tell since th coat he is wearing literally compares to king’s robe. pure hell. now look at mj and kavin: on top. cropped out here. kavin staring elsewhere sort of detached, his hands in pockets, glasses indicating some kind of smartness I dare say if we are allowed to assume glasses equal bookworms. are we? is it discrimination? I wear glasses too. dunno. but still part of it. but kind of not. mj about to sit down and get on the tech. his drowsy eyed look. deceitful, since he is the only one with half brain here.)

everything about is chef’s kiss. the smirk. the pompous walk. he owns the jerk™️, I could not take my eyes off him. I loathe him. it’s visceral.

thyme basically laughing that the poor guy has lost all his evidence. chills.

he is enjoying himself. you can just tell.

I see no regrets. all I am getting is someone who is mentally ill. sociopath. absolute barbarian.

when punched he cherishes the moment revenge calls.

someone is looking forward to a blood bath. can't relate.

aaaaanddd scene. that would've hurt.

anyone said violence? these f*ckers seems to be j*zzing their pants with excitement. honestly how do these kids study?

deranged is understatement at this point. maniacs. the lot of them.

yes. he is into it.

the king and his unhinged kingdom. bunch of crackers.

they want this. the plebs are also into it.

see what I mean? the fact gory decided to stand up to THIS thyme? ufff. she was literally putting her whole life out there. this boi LOCO.

thyme going ape shit when he sees ren hugging gorya. the menacing look, his demeanour from the stern brow to the execution of finer details like kicking the bins in the aftermath to let off steam. the way he plans to beat the crap out of the guy because he triggers the ‘cheating’ wound he has just freshly developed (albeit that there’s no cheating per se, but he caught his crush in a lie to be precise. terminology matters.) it’s the way he cottons on to the guy and his radar goes off. a hone wrecker. player. annihilation mode activated. and we know hurt people hurt people. but wow. that was something. on one had i sort of rejoiced he smashed the guy who hurt gorya (the s/a happened with this particular individual) and on the other im like trembling. is he gonna end him??? mj and kavin are out of sorts. what a scene. he screams at ren and calls him a shit friend like the whole thing is one hot big mess until gorya drags him away.

ultimate menace. betrayed.

oops about to be obliterated.

he spots his target. someone who just happens to be cheating.

did you call me girlfriend?

cos I'm busy. busy being angry. sad. hurt.

sight of ren and girlfriend procure a glitching eye.

thymeeeeee!

one bad bad tiger

idk how she does it. I would've checked out about two episodes ago...

the eyes though.

thyme being an absolute savage king when tesla misspoke. buttons were pressed and our impulse control trouble maker is back in the zone.

thyme flipping out at random person after a car chase? first episode. what was thaaaaaaaat. we moved on from that tooo quick.

thyme high key abducting and stalking gorya in order to bribe her into an official apology. just— what goes on in that boys head???

thyme very much requesting that hana LICKS his shoe.

this doesn't look like it could have a positive outcome. I mean in how many languages do I have say that this menacing look scares the Jesus out of me. you just know you are about to be destroyed and the devil will relish in it.

I can hear him calculate the punishment. hmm. a girl. what to do?

the trademark lemme demolish any semblance of sanity in your life look.

the: you should have known better look.

to be honest he is not wrong? thyme for once you used that brain cell correctly. albeit very briefly.

the disgust. lord he pulls these faces like it is a given.

the: you can looketh but cannot touch move. we understand thyme. I hate it when ppl randomly touch me too. shame you sort of like to beat people up, cos otherwise we could really have something special like idk. a pen pal would be nice.

no, because what was he thinking? it was not dirty that much I know. more like. what can you do? I don't need you. I don't want you peasant. you feel me?