#and yeah compared to other people i live a blessed life but idc im not settling for not the worst

[myheartbeatskids]

Jon: how long ago did you see him, it was a long time ago, i know!

Me: it was over a year ago

Robbie: and did you think id wait?!?! O.O

Me: yeah.

And I just laugh. Cause I know he did. Watch he will tell me.

Robbie: well shit, I did! But how did you know?!?!

Me: it isn't about me, Robby.

Jon: wow

Me: its about you. You know what is important

Robbie: my kids

Me: yeah And yourself. That's why we get a long and i know you don't need any one.

Robbie: you know how important my friends are to me and i left them all for you

Me: you know you didnt. You know my email.

MWII laughs heartedly

Me: hush it Matt. I only saw one kid and I know you guys had daddy's girl and mommys girl. Did you bring both?

Robbie: yeah you know I did

Me: so you had someone waiting at home for You when I saw you the first time?

Robbie laughs: she was with friends. See that's why i get you, you're so strict!

Me: yeah well when i got to my car I cried. You had me all fucked up.

Robbie: but why?!

Me: because you don't just strut into a Wal-Mart 900 miles from home like it ain't a thing.

Robbie: I know! I didn't!

Me: I know.

Robbie: but why did you cry

Me: because you made Me smile.

Robbie: wait what

Me: you made me laugh. But mostly because I knew.

Robbie: that I left? And i made you proud? Hey I ain't a kid. I'm a grown man!

Matt laughs

Me: shut up Matt. I know. A kid wouldn't know what to do.

Robbie: oh

Jesse: I see this thing between you too. Its different than me and her. You two. Im gonna cry. Its pure joy.

Robbie: happy to be alive. We made it. Sabrina, you did, too. That's why you cried. Because you knew I left And took both my kids. You knew you cared enough about me to teach it to me. And you cried for you. Me. And everyone in between. I'm a totally different man because of you. I thought i was good. I knew I was good. I thought I was deep. But you made deeper my thoughts, my joy, my temper. That's what I see you don't know. How much you impact others. You type and you stay angry and you fight and you fight and you will until you die. That's what you told me, now isnt it?

Me: yeah And I'm not finished.

Robbie: but almost. Dad?

Jesse: yeah I'm there. I see I know her because of you. They're different, don't you see, Sunny?

Sunny: yeah. I want to be happy too

Robbie: see there. That's what I mean. That's how Sabrina feels almost every day and the Annie. "But doesn't every body" that's what you used to say. I remember.

Me: I used to always think about that. You were the first person in a very long long time I talked to about happiness.

Robbie: well You did good. It stuck with me this while time and it changed my life completely. And I want to marry you

Me: I could say yes. [I try to skip MWII quickly] whoa shit your father is sitting there

Robbie: what's that got to do with anything?

Me: Idk he might try to compare dicks or something.

MWII: wow I think I'm embarrassed. I thought I was retro romance but he's good

Bobby: I'm telling you!

MWII: but she got babies!

Me: Matthew!

Bobby: like hes an annoying younger brother.

Jesse: well You can! You're Tarah's kid!

Robbie: mmm. Well what do you think, Sabrina?

Me: well we could date... Man it would be So nice just to have a turtle shell so I could just hide!

Robbie: no I'm for the whole thing

Kenny: no I've been trying to get her to get with me for months and I started years ago

Robbie: but see youre too busy you don't know how to make time for her or how t9 make her laugh

Jesse: is that true? He knows how to do thwt for you?

Me: yeah. Matt, quit! You're not about to be watching porn and youre gonna get blue balls all night!

Matt face palms: i hate myself

Jesse: well You are insane aren't you?!?!

Matt eagerly: uh huh. And i think you need to leave Robbie!

Jesse: he used to take my hat and throw it out the front door. Sabrina found 5 hats under the porch one day all belonging to me because obviously i wouldn't leave but my hat would stay!

Robbie: he's a little orphan and hasn't found anyone to love yet

Me: hes like a poltergeist.

Jesse: well this is really romantic.

Me: yeah it's a little strange isn't it? And he's your son and every thing to top it all off

Jesse: do you care?

Me: no its just unexpected. Like when I saw you at Wal-Mart, Robbie.

Robbie: yeah I know! You ran off!

Me: well i didn't mean to initially. I turned to tell Annabelle but she was gone.

Robbie: yeah but you did linger, we noticed. Well my daughter did

Me: I saw you running after me

Robbie: yeah well I didn't know your car

MWII: ohhhh shit.

Me: yeah I guess that makes sense. But then you got in your truck and i thought your daughter had gone in the store

Robbie: yeah she did.

Bobby: omg this is romantic!

Me: you run really fast. Like I thought I was crazy I was all no.. he probably went in the store. No one with that short legs can move that fast! And then disappear!!!!

Chuck: remember that ghost truck yesterday?

Me: that shit was funny.., i was all dam I thought it was a real truck... Then i got disappointed it was!

Robbie: is that what made you cry, that I disappeared?

Me: no you waited to run.

Robbie: well i told her what I was gonna do first.

Bobby: which was what? I'm on the edge of my seat.

Robbie: follow her home.

Bobby: to do what?

Robbie: tell her how I feel.

Me: O.O oh

Robbie: you're as lame as me. Hey dad. She used to do this shit to me. All sure and secure of herself and I would be all "oh" "but" "uhhh"

Me: he was cute tho.

Robbie: oh i bet. Cause you kept doing it.

Jesse: well go get her and bring her to me so i can place my hands on her head and bless her

MWII: well go on now, you know I don't want to marry you

Me: no Jesse! You just wanna suck what's left of my brain!!!

I decide to go out and smoke...

Jon: she looks like me when I was 10 ans ahe wanted to save me from the kid factory and I said "this lady loves me too much!!"

(Jesse did)

Out side:

Me: Chuck

Chuck: do what you want

Me: no, Chuck give me some advice.

Chuck: I wanna marry you!

Me: Jesse! Please tell me you don't wanna fuck!

Jesse: i don't wanna fuck

Sunny: this is too funny!! Let me meet him and I'll tell you what to do. I'll be your bridesmaid. Me and Annie we will share duties

Candy: me too mom

Me: sunny! Well it sounded like you already decided!!!

MWII laughs hysterically: shes all WTF?!?!

And laughs forever.

Shome: no one can tell you what to do.

Me: I know.

Bobby: then why you ask?!

Me: it's just so sudden!

Eric: it's been over a year

Me: well see I been busy. And i was just telling Jesse and the kids that i don't need any one.

Bobby: but romance!

Me: but I'm not like that.. I've pretty much always been single

Bobby: well that's stupid if you believe in true love and you know MWII ain't gonna do that for you. He just tries to protect you. Thats all.

Jesse: you look sudden but you already knew. He did everything you wanted. Did what -- did you promise?

Robbie: yeah.

Jesse: see thats all I have to say to you.

Robbie: Well shit Sabrina don't forget to breathe!

Me: oh! Well shit!

MWII: shes so funny

Me: you and kept calling me dumb! And he was sitting there waiting why didn't you say something! Well shit!

MWII: cause i didn't want to! Fuck you bitch! You're my sister!

Me: well quit telling people you're my husband!

MWII: shut up. Don't contradict me!

Me: alright, so you'll need to meet the kids

Robbie: all?! 0.0

Me: what if I said yes?

Robbie: 2 and Candy. You know my 2 already love you.

Jesse: do they?

Me: mmmhmm

Jesse: how do you know?

Me: they told me.

Jesse: well shit, idc go on get married

Me: you gonna pay for my wedding, daddy? You know you always wanted to be my daddy.

Jesse: I don't talk about money with strangers that fuck my son

Me: how about kids you baby sit and encourage you to take back your living ane abused kids like Jon?

Jesse: that's your kid, too. I'm bored. Hurry up and get married so i have something to do.

Me: brain wssh us? Do our laundry? Dirty dishes? Cook us food?

Jesse: are you not an adult?

Me: half the time lately im five or 6 why? Dont act like you're not 22.

Jesse: don't tell my real age. People can do math you know.

Me: ok, well Robby. Let's hang out, I don't have time to schedule a wedding

Robbie: oh yes you do!

MWII: sabrina goes what?

Me: no I was just gonna argue. No open ended questions, you know I stand my ground.

Robbie: oh friendly banter!

Me: well why aint you called or anything?

Robbie: well You look busy! And i just been working. And to be truthful I did need my time, you were right.

Me: well You do run really graceful.

MWII: shut the fuck up Sabrina you're just a nerd. Just say it Jesse you know you want to

Jesse: I can't! I'm shocked and pleased! Im surprised she actually found someone to love.

Bobby: now Sabrina don't cry

Me: wow that's a tall order! It's easier to get married!

Jesse: she's a tough cookie, and it would be one of my kids. I think that's pretty amazing.

Me: you know me and the bestie talk about this...like men living on their own to get to know themselves before even thinking about marriage

Eric: well now its time!

Jesse: I was wondering why you get along so well. I remember the first time you saw her, your eyes lit up with joy. No not at your parents in Okmulgee

Me: oh Oklahoma. When I was walking in the street with tiffany

Jesse: yes

Me: and you hid your eyes

Robbie: i thought they were making fun of me and i was already married a month and a few days And unhappy. I didn't want you to deal with that

Me: then I saw you at UNM after i gradh9and went to have lunch with the bestie.

Jesse: how do you remember that?

Me: because both times I said how did hot and sexy get on this Earth and both times he ran away too fast. And I've only said that about him.

Jesse: O.O well go on get married then!! Sunny you don't need to meet him!! That's what I prayed for! I put that in Mr Gloom for her!! God works fast, doesn't he!!!.?

Me: yeah. I didn't put anything in it, I couldn't think of anything. I knew I work too hard not to be a success. So thank you.

Jesse: well aren't you a little bitch? Seriously. You didn't put anything?

Me: I didn't.

Jesse: you sent me the link and you didn't?

Me: I didn't get to it. I was busy trying to fix everyone else's.

Jesse: like you tried to fix his.

Me: i should put wrinkles tho, I noticed my frown lines are deep and solid

Jesse: there's always next year

Me: i figured if I just smiled more, they would go away on their own. So it looks like you already put it in for me this year.

Bobby: well fucking shit! Im gonna cry!

Just about every one else: its about time you catch up!!

Bobby breaths it back in: there I'm caught up... O no I'm not!

Robbie: well You know you could be kissing and they will pucker up.

Jesse: looks like I did it for you two times.

https://burnzozobra.com/all-about-zozobra/

[punkscowardschampions]

Carly & Ali

Carly: last nite was good of you Carly: saying thanks cuz i read my text from last nite & it was Carly: I cudnt read it k thats facts Ali: nah, don't mention it, no bitch left behind Ali: plus, I know the cunt doing the ditching, been there, like Ali: was trying to translate but yeah, you were pretty fucked 😂 Ali: how you feeling this am? 💚 Carly: yea? hes not that bad Carly: im a slag like he said tbh Carly: feeling like i had a decent nite all things considered Carly: you? Ali: Gurl, yes he is and no you ain't! Ali: Probably Ali: Who cares if you are, he is, and the rest Ali: I dated him for a bit, so there's no shady, tryna steal your man on the sly going on, don't worry Ali: much the same, my head feels like someone took my eyes out and shoved 'em up my arse, you know? Ali: standard sunday vibes Carly: aw you're sweet but it's no diss on me Carly: like ive cheated on him a few times Carly: but he does it too you're right w that Carly: hes a good fuck when he's not too wasted tho which you kno if you got it too Carly: you're single now tho? Carly: can have him back if you want Ali: Fair play Ali: why not call it open and call it a day? Ali: Probs 'cos he likes fighting as much as he likes fucking Ali: Meh, yeah, was passable, gotta have some reason to keep him around, like Ali: Nah, going out with the girl that drove us back Ali: Remember? Dark hair, angry Carly: yea Carly: you know Carly: shit my bad Carly: she was scary is what i've got in my head Carly: idk my head is sketch cant trust it Ali: That's a fair assessment, I reckon Ali: She wouldn't hate it either so you good 😉 Carly: pretty tho Carly: call it a trade up Ali: Yeah, she's cute Ali: you need any more of the night filling in lemme know, I'll do my best Ali: it was pretty standard though, nothing too wild Carly: no faking it w her cuz shes too drunk Carly: designated driver be like Carly: last i see i was getting with his friend lowkey and he went off about it im blank from then Ali: its a fucking gay crime to ever fake it, no matter what Ali: I can get behind that one tho, not got the time or energy tbh Ali: yeah i think him and his friend then got in a scrap and then they left Ali: bros before hoes mentality hardcore, like idk, have fun jerking each other off then, if that's ur vibe boys Carly: k that sounds legit from what i caught on his socials Carly: didnt upload the circle jerk bless Carly: gay crimes must of been committed Ali: sad face Ali: coulda spat on his back Ali: protip Carly: ill let him know when he texts me later Carly: how did you kno where i live? state of me Carly: sorry to drag you this way Ali: plottwist, i'm a massive stalker with bad intentions Ali: I truly don't know, but I'll tell Lene she should be a cabbie 'cos she managed and I don't think we got any puke in her car Carly: k big lesbian crush on me yea Carly: ioher lots Carly: stealing her girl and wrecking her car in one Ali: Naturally, you cute Ali: I'll give you her number if you like, or just pass along the thanks and soz Carly: awh you're cuter Carly: probs still drunk tho Carly: giving me those kind words Carly: you handle the now ex if you love me Ali: Hahaha, he'd LOVE that Ali: ghosts of gf past Ali: Let me and I'll love you forever Carly: go for it Ali: let's see if I've still got his number Ali: this contact list is a minefield of mistakes but the real embarrassment would be getting them muddled up, fo'shame! Carly: i can give it Carly: used it more recently than you Carly: up there at my top Ali: won't be tellin' him that Ali: don't need the ego boost Ali: but tah Carly: makes it more fun to fuck him over if you praise him first Carly: but maybe thats me Ali: like a shit sandwich Ali: I get it Carly: hungry for anything but that rn Carly: [Sends the number tho] Ali: wanna come for brunch Ali: now you are newly gay Ali: that's what they do, fucking sex in the city up in dis bitch Carly: yea? weird Carly: not what i thought Carly: awh first date tho Ali: forreal, even the butch ones, don't let 'em fool you, its all fancy fucking eggs and screwdrivers by 11am Ali: you call 'em mimosas tho, gotta pretend you're being classy Carly: wtf is a screwdriver Ali: Babe! Ali: Vodka and orange juice Carly: i call it that Carly: gays and their labels Ali: save it for the rant sesh honey Ali: love you talking about how men ain't shit as well Carly: thats the ones i fuck Carly: cant be bringing no poshos to a caravan Ali: Posh boys are only good for the money anyway, I'm sure Ali: not finding any in 24 like regardless Carly: not gonna find out if they do drive by now im a lesbian wife Carly: sorry lads Ali: they had their chance Ali: unlucky boys Carly: should prob tell me your name again if im taking it Ali: Ruins the mystery a bit but alright Ali: Its Ali Ali: Ali McKenna if we're being formal Carly: k you've got the hot brothers Carly: makes sense Ali: 🤔 Ali: I think you're thinking of someone else, babe Carly: not trying to have our first fight but you coulda told me before we got hitched, bitch Carly: you're still hot tho don't be sad Ali: so you could run off with one of my brothers? i think not Ali: unless you meant Tommy 'cos he's very single but that's unlikely because he's never here Ali: stuck with me for now, hoe 😘 Carly: a slag like me could do worse Carly: has Ali: bitch, same Ali: we can compare notes, see how many regrets we got in common Carly: yea Carly: doing it Ali: Good, save it for brunch 'cos I'm coming forreal Ali: we don't have to deal with a gaggle of gossiping gays tho, bring you a maccies breakfast? Carly: k Carly: be fun Carly: you are from what i remember Ali: I like that Ali: No bullshit Ali: Imma start all interactions like be fun please or I'm out Ali: ✌ bringing the fun and the bacon babe Carly: you're not bringing your gf are you Ali: Nah, how awkward, meet the missus, honey Carly: like there's usually a lad in my trio sorry Carly: still learning this lesbian life Ali: oh, are you bi legit? Ali: she's way too jealous for threesomes, you're good Carly: nah i just know what lads want Ali: Oh gurl Ali: that's why Lene ain't coming Ali: the lecture you're avoiding Carly: idc Carly: youre my wife now bitch Ali: 💍💍 Ali: Productive morning, if I do say so myself Ali: and we're hanging, fuck with us Carly: good influence of you cuz i havent done fuck all this week Ali: Hard work being a bi icon, babe Ali: wait 'til I get you on the yoga hype Carly: wtf Carly: is that a joke Ali: nah, I've already done half an hour this morning Carly: bitch i had my fingers crossed you mistyped yogurt Carly: i love you but its a no Ali: 😂 lets be really into yogurt, not fancy stuff, like fucking froobs Carly: phallic Carly: slurping on my dick shaped yogurt Ali: exactly Ali: what do men love more than a representation of their genitals shoved in your mouth? nothing, is the answer, bar the real thing Ali: so seductive Carly: they don't like food in bed tho, but maybe thats my technique Carly: thinking you could use whatever Carly: k just gonna dump this curry out yea bear with Ali: spicy Ali: imagine the yeast infection you'd get from a fromage frais Carly: like sorry but if i can handle cum in my eye you can deal with some saag aloo boy Carly: googling those symptoms would be a laff tho Ali: ugh, now i want indian Carly: date 2, babe Ali: 😍 Ali: this is all moving so fast Ali: 'bout it Carly: thats all i kno about lesbians k Ali: Its so true Ali: Can confirm Carly: is your gf gonna be mad that im flirting with you Carly: cuz im scrappy but she's scary Ali: 😂 Ali: Probably but when I tell her you're straight she'll have to chill Ali: yeah, we're married BUT SHE'S STRAIGHT, BABE Carly: can't tell her how many girls ive fucked cuz i dont remember Carly: convenient Ali: Best keep that on the DL, yeah Ali: like your blatant gay feelings for me Carly: k Carly: been a secret before no big Ali: Awh babe, ain't nothing dirty about this Ali: I shall tell the world Carly: you're sweet Ali: Probably not if you still wanna be getting that D but you know, noblest intentions, like Carly: im over it Carly: go off Ali: when your pussy's the cure Ali: how can I be humble now? 😏 Carly: dont be Carly: proud slags who fucking love froobs Carly: its a mood Ali: that is a whole ass mood Ali: put it on a t-shirt, babe Carly: earn some bread for my table Ali: solid business plan Ali: we can't be the only ones Carly: independent women who don't need no dick Carly: anymore Ali: hell yeah! Ali: unless that dick wanna pay the bills, in which case we'll let 'em Ali: so we can get more froobs Carly: point Ali: oh no, someone put a pic of Molly Briggs vomming on Insta Ali: 1. gross 2. who hasn't been there, poor bitch Carly: sad Carly: hope she's alright Ali: I'd ask but don't really know her and her phone must already be blowing up Ali: plus she threw a netball right in my face once and I don't forget, bitch Ali: jk, I'll just report the pic 😂 Carly: they all call me a whore cba to keep track of which mollys or other bitches Ali: She is a bit of a bitch, ain't gonna sugarcoat it so probably Ali: not saying Karmas real but posted on that friggin' TallaghtSlags page so 🤷 Ali: grab a froob, darling Carly: her name makes me wanna party with her dad but thats as far as im fucking with that family Carly: or mum i dont know who picked it like Ali: Init, proper old skool ravers, obvs Ali: think I'm out of eccies, sadly Ali: last night depleted me Carly: Watch me call my son Bennie cos I got anxiety, baby Ali: Cute tho, whole medicine cabinet of babies Carly: why not im married now Ali: We'll get on that, date 3, like Carly: where you taking me? Ali: up the wheyyyyyyyyyy Ali: well, we had brunch, indian, obvs we're fat bitches Ali: get on that chinese buffet life Carly: you can get on your yoga mat tho Carly: im fucked Carly: letting myself go so soon my bad Ali: Please, you're perfect Ali: I'll have all the kids if you want Carly: blushing is what i am Carly: how many you want? Ali: how many people names are there for drugs? molly bennie mandy charlie umm Ali: and our preachy child, frank Carly: ha Carly: tina that's one Ali: Ooh, yes, a gay icon Carly: billy, bud our weak child, cosmic kelly who's gonna have to style that out Ali: oh kelly, I hope you have the personality to match or we've really fucked you over there, soz babe Carly: can't forget dimitri, lucy or mandy Carly: sweet sweet mary joy Ali: My fanny hurts just thinking about it Carly: christine and tina are obvs twins thats a relief Carly: how manys that? Ali: 13 Ali: Unlucky for some but my actual lucky number! Ali: Fated Carly: ha Carly: it's love and keeps being proven Ali: can't fight what's clearly so right Carly: true Ali: you want a milkshake Ali: i'm having one Carly: yea Carly: strawberry Ali: 'cos u so sweet 💚 Carly: awww Ali: I shall be right there, with brunch fit for a pair of proud slags Carly: k Carly: my parents arent here no need to break the news of wedded bliss Ali: Would be a weird first impression but I could rock it Ali: new fave in-law? I think so Carly: yea Carly: cant fight fate like Carly: been said Ali: forreal, catch me outside if you got something to say, lads Ali: alone time with the bae is always good tho Carly: you kno Carly: love you bitch Ali: love ya 😘