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#andre lee x reader
vrisrezis · 2 days ago
Since ur ask box is open can u do an Inside Job hc/post for Andre and Brett where a new member of the team joins Cognito Inc. n they’re like a total badass and Andre is immediately whipped? thx also I rly like ur other posts for Owl House lol 💖
Glad you like my owl house stuff ah <33
Andre just thinks you’re so cool? There is something about badass’s that really got him in a chokehold 😭 he would almost be too scared to flirt with you at first but he eventually is like “fuck it” and does it anyway. Don’t let this fool you though, the way he feels for you is more than a fling to him and it’s obvious from the way he acts. He doesn’t just make attempts to have sex with you, he also does nice things for you, gets you things he’d know you’d like! He’s also really helpful with any questions you may have about cognito inc.
Brett is such welcoming guy in general, he knows what it felt like to be new at cognito and how nervous he felt about impressing everyone so he tries to make you feel welcomed. He ends up fumbling over his words at first, cause wow you’re really pretty. And it’s like the gang immediately knows what’s going on and interrogate you right away. So much for being welcoming and making you feel comfortable. But, you were a major badass about it and that’s how he knew he was over the moon for you.
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brettsshrimp · 11 days ago
so I've been having many thoughts about like a sweet yet kinda oblivious reader with the group. These are just general ideas but if anyone wants me to elaborate on any let me know:o
cw // drug mentions
• bringing everyone their favorite coffee in the morning and always having little snacks
• when Brett starts working there, you ask what his fav coffee is, and he doesn't think much of it, thinking it's just an ice breaker or smth, but the next day you come in with his fav drink along with the others and he's just,, stunned. like,,, he didn't think anyone would do that since he's knew,, he's just like?????hmsnxj,,
• also having bandaids and wipes along with the snacks in a little backpack or purse
• Brett comes to you a lot with a papercut or some other minor injury and a pout on his face asking for a bandaid. he loves the care that you give, wiping the cut then carefully putting the bandaid on,,, he's soft,, especially after the smile you give him, telling him to be careful,,
• helping Glenn with his divorce therapy if he really wanted to work on his personality after the body switching thing. like helping with listening/ trying not to yell ect.
• when a session goes really well you take him out to dinner, or something he's been talking about wanting lately. even if a session doesn't go as well you remind him that's okay!! progress isn't linear and you're still proud of him!!!
• being shopping buddies with Gigi, and getting your nails done together. Also trying to help with like making media trends, whether it's like memes or fashion, she likes hearing any ideas you have
• Myc and Andre have tried to make dirty jokes and innuendos but they always fly over your head. it used to drive Andre crazy but Myc was always amused seeing your confused face, trying to understand the joke. At first Andre thought you were just messing with him but Myc confirmed that you really just didn't get it
• I like to imagine that one day while you were still relatively new to the job, Andre came up to you and was like what the hell are you on?? since you've always seemed so happy, patient and just? over all bubbly. and you're just like "??? on what??" Andre just kinda laughs until he realizes your serious
• he kinda wonders if you even know more than 5 drugs. I also like to think that at some point he takes the time to teach you how to tell when someone spiked your drink, even if you don't go out much. he just wants to make sure your safe and having a good time<3
• he's also like hey, if you ever decide you wanna try drugs, hit me up! he'll make sure you have a good and safe time,,
• going off the dirty joke point, one time you were trying to learn more about Myc's species and Myc found out, and he was like hey, if you come over to my place tonight, I can show you a thing or two. rather than being flustered or smth along those lines like he was expecting, you just kinda got excited in an innocent way, wondering what he could show you
• he even put a tentacle on your shoulder and there just,, wasn't a single dirty thought in there. it was just you wondering what he could show you, and what snacks he might like hnfhfj
• hanging out with Reagan, listening to her talk about a new invention or something her dad did. or if she's not in the mood to talk/ focusing on her work you're happy to talk about random things
• also bringing her drinks and food, making sure she isn't overworking herself too much
• Reagan tries really hard to keep you away from her dad, even if it's impossible. she doesn't want him hurting you in any way or trying to manipulate you into doing something for him,, she wants to keep you safe from him,,
• doing their nails and hair on (somehow) less busy days. even though Myc doesn't have either, you still decorate him with little accessories so he isn't left out,,
• I like to think Myc and Glenn call you kiddo. Myc uses it more to just tease you while Glenn does it more out of seeing you as a kid he never had(though he won't admit it just yet)
• you and Brett totally get together and plan little surprise parties. like nothing extreme just a little thing for everyone to calm down. like there's everyone's fav food and drinks. even if it isn't a birthday party or Christmas, you get little gifts for everyone, even Brett who didn't see it coming:(<3 (he might tear up a little hnmsdjd,, I love him)
• Myc probably read your mind once while you and Brett were planning a surprise party and totally spoiled it for everyone. he got the cold shoulder from you for a day or two after,, was it a little overdramatic? yeah
• also!! being excited to go to the 80's town too! even if you weren't born in the 80's, or really understand the hype of it like Reagan, seeing Brett be excited about it has you getting a little excited too. you totally dressed up with Brett which made him so happy
• lord have mercy on anyone that makes you upset. if any of them finds out someone hurt you in any way, that info spreads like a wildfire to the rest of the team, and you have to stop them and reassure them you'll be okay before they completely ruin the person's life jsnshk
• they just really appreciate you being there for them and wanna be there for you too:(<3
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froggy-frogz · 21 days ago
Not to be NSFW but uhh 😳😳
Brett and Andre getting pegged by their s/o headcannons mayb ??
If u don’t wanna do this I understand !!
A/N: I will definitely write this lmao. There's no way, looking at these two, that they don't like getting pegged. Again since this is nsfw please read at your own discretion.
Oh boy. Uh, sorry to tell you but 8/9 times out of ten, Brett's going to get pegged/topped when you two have sex. Like. He's just like that.
He's really shy when he first comes to you and asks. Like, spurting and his entire face, from the neck up, is bright cherry red.
The first couple of times, he's going to be so awkward. He doesn't know what to do. Please help him. Sweet boy hasn't done that much sexual stuff.
Lube. Oh God please have a lot of lube. He will need it. The first challenge is getting him ready and prepped but once that's done and over, Brett's actually more excited than nervous.
You're not even halfway into him and he's a moaning, weak mess. He doesn't know what to say or do because he's just ruined. You haven't even touched him either.
Please be gentle with him. Brett's one to prefer gentle sex then rough ones. He also likes it when you hold his hand to when you fuck into him.
He also enjoys sitting on your lap. Chances are, Brett's going to be taller and broader than you, so this might be an issue, but he's going to help you make it work.
Once you're fully inside of him, he's going to become a begging, whiny mess.
If given the chance, he'll ride you, and it's the prettiest sight. He's going to let out the prettiest moans and when he says your name it's godly.
While you're fucking him, please praise him, he loves it. Can't get enough of it. Call him a good boy, tell him he's doing a job, literally anything and he'll cum quick
He won't ask you. It's just not something that he'll really think about saying to you. He's too shy too. If you do go to him and ask he will agree to it, but you're going to have to bring it up.
He already has an assorted collection of dildos and surprisingly enough, straps to choose from. Almost like he hoped you would ask.
Andre's more straightforward and since you've asked, will ask now. Very casually.
Like, "Hey babe, care to get the strap out?"
He's still going to be a bit shy and going to need a lot less lube than Brett. It's a lot easier to get that shit in him because well, he's got a load more experience than Brett.
It's about half and half with if he wants you to be rough. Sometimes he wants to go all out, sometimes when he's in that mood, a really gentle, sweet mood, he'll want you to be soft with him.
In my previous post, he has really loud, pretty moans and whimpers, and if you angle just right, or hit the right spot, he will come undone. Like that. He'll most likely cum on the spot.
I can see him having a slight hair kink, so feel free to pull his hair.
He's a lot kinkier than Brett, let's face it. Brett's very vanilla and Andre's as kinky as they come.
You can tie Andre up, bite him, call him your slut, he will not care. He's not one for pain though or seeing you in pain. That's where he'll draw the line.
After a while, he'll get bigger and bigger straps for you to use. He probably has a size kink, just look at him.
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cognitosclowns · 12 days ago
THE POST ABT THE GANGS LAUGHS KS IMMACULATE here's a couple other prompts. the gangs hugs, handshakes, or sleeping habits just bc I love your characterization!!!
Tw : brief weight mention!
So if you're her close friend or s/o? YOU,,, MIGHT GET AN ACTUAL HUG? Not just a little Pat Pat? LIKE ARMS FULLY AROUND YOU? Quite Shocking Quite Surprising
She tends to wrap around and grab the shoulders!! It's One Firm Motion that slowly disconnects, like a hydraulic press?
'don't die, I'm too tired to plan a funeral' SHE CARES SHE CARES she really wants you to get home safe <333
HE LIFTS YOUUUUU STRAIGHT UP. He makes a big 'H-yup!'
HE HUMS ALL THROUGH THE HUG <33 he smells So Strongly Of Axe Body Spray but,, its ok bc he's grinning like an idiot. So happy. Hugs rock.
He'll like,, bounce his knees?? Like going up and down?? MNSDMS ITS HARD TO DESCRIBE.
HE ALSO DEFINITELY LAUGHS. just a happy little giggle <3 he loves hugs, idk what you expected. Might nuzzle his nose into your shoulder!
'one of us has gotta let go, or you'll never get home ! :)'
OH,, just,, the happiest hugs. She hugs like she's got Pure Joy flowing through her. Saying goodbye is never a sad affair with Gigi Thompson!
'If people keep getting taller im gonna need new legs.'
'if you wanna stick around i could just shove you in my purse <3'
ARMS RIGHT AROUND THE WAIST <3 synched in like a belt!
SHE DOES LA BISE <3 she picked it up from living in France for a few years for a Big PR Campaign she working on, and it stuck!! A kiss on the cheek before you're off <3
he'll tackle you onto the nearest couch and just lay there with you
'sorry i can't let go ://// tragic guess you've gotta take me home with you now <3'
SNBDSNDB HE'LL LET GO EVENTUALLY. until then it's a buncha jokes
'Nice weather huh?' while his face is Accidentally Buried In Your Chest, etc. HE ONLY LETS GO WHEN HE MAKES YOU SMILE <33
If He's Not Out For Blood lmao, HE THROWS HIS ARMS AROUND YOUR SHOULDERS. he's pretty lanky so it gives him a leg up for Yanking ppl in!!! Big, tight Squeeze before letting go.
'GOTCHA!' TENTACLES ALL TENTACLES WRAPPED AROUND YOU. Feels like you're being JUICED with how tight his hugs are.
he might do some,, like,, tricks? Like turn you upside down or smth and be like 'watch outttt,, might drop you ;) its okay if you hit your head you don't have a lotta brain cells left to lose'
(DW,, he'd never drop you. His tentacles are surprisingly strong, he's just a dick <3)
'ok ok ok ok..' while he brushes you off after, fixes your hair a bit. Might make some comment about how you shouldn't take a specific road bc it's gonna be clogged, etc, etc.
He Does Care, Hes Just A Brat.
'hate to see ya leave, but i love to see ya walk away' IS SUCH A LINE HE'D SAY. I HATE IT. HE'D ABSOLUTELY SAY SOME SHIT LIKE THAT. <3 INSUFFERABLE.
God,,, you could just melt. The warmest, softest thing in the WORLD. He might even pick you up and swing you around, if he's feeling particularly fuzzy <3
THIS,, REALLY LOVING, HUMMING LAUGH?? it cracks him up that most ppl are tinier than him?? Look up and it's all teeth <3
doesn't matter your weight, he's gonna mention you need to put some meat on those bones!! It was too easy to pick you up!!
'Be safe soldier' grgkrkg <3 lots of shit like that. Just,, half-teasing army slang n stuff?? YEA THAT'S HIS JAM <3 Maybe a little,, Two Finger Salute and a wink when you exit out the door.
He,,, might not be that good at hugs-
HE DOESN'T DO THEM OFTEN OKAY? When he says goodbye he much prefers,, A Dainty Kiss on the Cheek, A Handshake. hugs are not his first instinct smdnsd.
When he first wraps his arms around you,, it's kinda tense?? He doesn't Squeeze first - he wants to see how hard YOU squeeze, and work around that.
It's still gonna be a Little Too Strong, sorry. Kinda knocks the wind outta you.
HE,,, is actually soft and warm?? You definitely wouldn't expect it bc he's 99% metal but above that metal is SILICONE. HE'S ALSO A COMPUTER SO,, he has the same Dull Warmth of pressing your hand to the side of a computer.
Fussing With Your Clothes When you Two Pull Away IS A Love Language. He'll passively adjust your shirt n sleeves with,, the Barest Of Smirks.
feels like,, hugging a bushel of twigs. He's extremely lanky smnds. Very little softness except a bit at his stomach
he just,, automatically Sighs happily <3 even if you two are saying goodbye, it's so nice to get a hug once in a while.
he either rests his head on your shoulder, or head. Either way you're getting some nuzzles.
It's like all the energy in his body Drains when he gets hugged. his brain is usually moving a mile a minute, and hugs kinda reset that? Doesn't matter how he was before, The Hug sends him down to Baseline. His shoulders slowwwllllly droop, His muscle lax, <3
'got everything? Keys, wallet, phone - I could spot you a cab...' THIS IS HIS WAY OF SHOWING HE CARES <333
Even after you two pull away, you're getting some Tight Arm Rubs while he takes you in <3 He'll always tell you too Be Safe <3
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insidemalewife · 18 days ago
grrr andre x reader fluff ? 💥💥🔫
ofc I love andre sm </3
andre is definitely the kinda guy that wants you on top of him when cuddling. just the weight and heat of another person on top of him (🤨) makes him all giddy and giggly god he's so mfmfmmf.
this sounds so weird but i feel like he's a sniffer?? like he just loves how you smell, whether it be ur perfume, cologne, body wash, shampoo, whatever it is, he loves it. expect him to steal ur hoodies and just HUFF them. you catch him stuffing and rubbing his face in the crook of ur neck and it's just so fuckn💥💥💥💥 his second biggest addiction aside from drugs is definitely your scent.
i feel like andre just likes to be warm and comfy? like this guy has a shit ton of pillows and blankets on his bed. he'll be sitting criss cross and all bundles in blankets while you paint his nails, constantly smiling at you and stealing kisses from you.
you make andre wanna be sober more often so he can actually enjoy spending time with you SOBS.
if you work at cognito inc (which you most likely will) he will 100% want you to sit on his lap during meetings. or basically at time of the day when you guys aren't on a mission. he's a very physically affectionate guy because he has a hard time expressing it through words, so he'll just hug you and hold ur hand and kiss you </3
he absolutely can NOT cook for shit, so he used to just order takeout and stock up on junk food. so when you and him get together and you start cooking actual meals for him, he MELTS. knowing that you put the effort into making something for him making him all happy :)
(sorry this is kinda short i got bored SHSHDMD)
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orionndjarin · a day ago
Hey guys I made a side blog since inside job is consuming my thoughts also I wanna try my hand at writing for the characters
So follow me if you want
And send me asks I will try my best with them
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that1weirdkiddo · 7 days ago
Andre (inside job) with a professional personal chef as a s/o hc!!!
You got it!
CW// drugs
- let me tell you, all that man knows is cheap take out, a shit ton of snacks, and edibles. So it’s safe to assume he literally cannot cook for shit.
- when you came into his life, it was like some sort of gift. [he was surprised that you had even decided to cook for him the first time, though]
- Andre absolutely adores watching you cook, whether he be absolutely zooted or sober [it’s one of the few moments where he can actually calm down and not have to worry about his OCD with all of the movement and calculations that happen in the kitchen]
- he likes to joke that you and him are on opposite sides of the spectrum [“cooking and drugs? What a pair.”] he says that like edibles don’t exist. Smh
- if you ever make a childhood dish that he probably doesn’t even remember? This man is on his knees, ready to propose with a ring pop
- please get this man a healthy diet. Consuming drugs on a regular basis while also constantly having subpar fast food on the daily is bound to have consequences, so just treat him right.
- genuinely, he’s so grateful for you. He loves coming home from work to see a beautiful display of food that you had somehow whipped up while he was gone [he could’ve sworn it took longer to make that]
- you once made him something after a really stressful work day and he couldn’t stop crying [in the /pos way, I swear]
- okay but hear me out: him trying to cook with you
- he’s like an excited kid who wants to help. He offers to do small tasks, gets excited about opening a can with a can opened- he asks if he can lick anything off of a spoon, out of the bowl, etc.
- he’s a menace to chef culture [™️], but you love him, and he loves you
- he also once tried to cook something but ended up nearly burning half the kitchen down, but we don’t talk about that.
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insideh4ndj0b · 15 days ago
andre footjob as promised. contains feet (obv), established andrexreader, gn reader, consensual somno, no penetration
You're sharing the bed with Andre, your absolute perv of a boyfriend. You're fast asleep and, while you gave him consent to "do whatever" while you were sleeping quite some time ago, he's never taken you up on that offer. You're starting to wonder if he's forgotten. Your wondering ceases when you're woken up one night.
You're asleep, laying on your side with your feet poking out of the covers when you wake up. You're awoken by the soft sound of fabric shuffling and, squinting, you realize that Andre's no longer in the bed with you.
Then you feel something press against your foot.
Now that wasn't something you were expecting, exactly, but you can work with it.
You stay still for a little while, wanting him to think you were still asleep. Your eyes adjust to the dark and at the foot of the bed you spot your boyfriend, cock pulled out of his pajama pants and pressed against the soft sole of your upturned foot.
Andre's got a hand firmly pressed to his mouth to smother any sounds he might make. This was a secret he was keeping from you, he doesn't quite want you to know. But it was just something he was too drawn by, he couldn't put off at least trying it any longer.
He starts to roll his hips, choking down groans. His other hand is lightly rubbing your other foot, over your heel, the sole, and the ball of your food, committing it to memory.
Andre swears under his breath and he keeps rutting. He's usually out of timing with his thrusts but this is a level higher than you've seen before. The motions of his hips are completely rhythm-less and jagged. Desperate.
"Andre~" You hum, pressing your foot further into his hand. He immediately gasps and freezes, looking at you with wide eyes as you smile softly at where he is at the foot of the bed.
"I'm uh, actually I'm sleep walking. I'm not actually awake. Uh. Good- good night!" He starts moving back to his side of the bed to try and lay down next to you, but you stop him with a foot to his chest.
"Nuh-uh." You keep him right where he is. "You have to show me what you were doing."
His hands squeeze into fists a few times before he moves back to where he was. His erection hasn't flagged in the slightest, and he's grateful that the room is dark enough that it hides his bright red face. With unsteady, trembling fingers, he caresses your foot and repositions it. Wanting to help, you keep your foot wherever he puts it.
Andre swallows hard before he takes his dick in one hand and pushes it against the sole of your foot once more, softly rocking.
"Ah, it kind of tickles," You giggle and, surprisingly, he moans at that. "You want me to help?"
"You- heh- you already are," He groans, "Fuck, you're so soft here." He whimpers.
"Let me try, let me try," You flip over onto your back and prop yourself up on your elbows. Carefully, making sure not to put too much pressure, you sandwich his dick between your two feet. He gasps and doubles over, hands holding onto your legs as he starts to fuck into the space that you've made for him.
"Fuck, babe, fuck, thank you, thank you," He grunts out, murmuring with every uneven thrust.
"Yeah? You like this?" You purr. Andre whimpers, unable to stop himself from moving. "You gonna make a sticky mess all over my feet? I want you to. I wanna see what your cum looks like dripping from my feet."
He's speeding towards his climax, and he doesn't think that he could stop even if he wanted to. He's so desperate for this, he's wanted this for so long, he's so, so close.
Then you say something that puts the final nail in the coffin.
"Maybe you could lick it off afterwards."
He cries out, pressing his forehead to your legs and squeezing his eyes shut as his orgasm hits him like a freight train. He's spilling cum between the soles of your feet, cock throbbing and twitching with each heavy pump. White stickiness drips down, trailing down his length and dripping onto the bed.
"So messy," You tease as he pants, pulling is dick out from between your feet. Calmly, you extend one foot out to his face, "Now, I think you know what comes next."
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ofeliahogwartsmystery · 9 months ago
Sensitive senses
In the library...
Mc: *sitting next to Talbott chatting with Rowan*
Talbott: *try to focus on his book*
Mc: Oh hi Talbott! *she comes close to his ear to tell him a funny secret and blows when whispering to him, it wasn't even that close actually*
Talbott: *His skin bristles and he closes the book so fast to run flushed from his face to his neck* Damn, I can't ever concentrate with her around...
Mc: What just happened?
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vrisrezis · 17 days ago
Until I get actual rqs for inside job I did some Andre relationship hcs because he’s my fav and I am whipped ;D
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- okay so for starters andre is experienced with sex but not relationships in itself honestly lol. Like I hc he uses sex to cope (just like with drugs). It gives him the excitement and distraction he needs at times, so while you can potentially provide that for him (there’s also the possibility you don’t want sex in your relationship so) dating him is a bit messy at first. Mainly because he freaks out and doesn’t know how he should deal with this at first.
- as a result he brings up sex a lot to like myc, gigi, etc and they’re like Jesus Christ just like masturbate or something and hes like … ohhhh..
- but anyways all this aside he’s very inexperienced in a relationship so please forgive him.
- he’s so sweet though, and he really tries to be a good boyfriend! He tries buying you stuff, but at first he’s just like.. wtf do I buy them? It starts out small, with just a coffee, to like a full meal, (big fucking contrast lmao) but then it goes to cute shit he thinks you’d like, yknow like a cute teddy bear or something lame, and then to like nice flowers he knows you’d really like, to just something actually meaningful to you, like a video game you’ve been talking about wanting or something.
- speaking of video games, he has plenty you two can play he’s a gamer ok guys and he really loves any kind of games so you two can bond over pretty much any game and talk about it forever and plus side if he doesn’t know it he’s happy to learn more about it. But beware of multiplayer games, he’s competitive as fuck and gets kinda angry lol.
- anyways if you’re lucky to be dating the man scared of commitment, you definitely work at Cognito Inc. it’s just easier that way! You two can see eachother like all the time and you both don’t have to keep any secrets from eachother it is the best <3
- ps since you’re dating you probably do drugs . Probably smoke pot at the very least .
- he’s a clingy guy alright so yknow these factors make it easier to see you, more excuses for him to have like he’s totally helping you with work or he’s just seeing you to hook you up with more drugs LMAO
- anyways clingy guy, I mean it. Loves having an arm around your shoulder or waist, holding your hand, anything. He needs to touch you in some way shape or form okay.
- big cuddler as you’d expect, admittedly likes being the small spoon, it’s just comforting and makes him feel small in the best way.
- if your strong enough he likes being picked up bridal style, he’s pretty light too so it’s not like it’s hard to carry him .. he’s just very tall and lean
- makeouts happen often with him, which usually lead to sex unless you’re not comfortable, ready, etc.
- but even if you don’t want sex it’s fine he loves making out with you
- he likes just sitting and watching tv with you with his chin on the top of your head
- probably just gets high with you a lot and just relaxes
- anyways, he’s very domestic and loves domestic shit
- like he is so in love with you, he never thought he’d ever be okay with commitment, the though terrified him and so does the idea of being domestic with somebody it opens up so many doors he’s not sure he’s ready to open yet
- but then he sees you cooking with your fucking apron and he’s like.. yeah… I am in love with this mf
- like he never really cooked for himself honestly like he would just order takeout or something but then you make him food and he like dies
- brags about you a lot to his coworkers when you’re not around, kinda his way of coping when he can’t be around you and shit
- also he’s so comfortable around you, he opens up to you so easily and he’s just so okay with being himself and being vulnerable
- he will just stare at you with this dumb smile and you roll your eyes because he’s such a fucking loser and you love him
- he’s just very honest with you about things and he tries really hard to be a good boyfriend because he knows he’s not the BEST at everything but he’s really trying here.
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brettsshrimp · 10 days ago
since I can't sleep I've been thinking of Christmas headcanons since it's almost that month ww
• you and Brett go all out with decorating the office!! and at first everyone's like???? it's not even December wtf but soon enough they get dragged in by puppy eyes and pout from you two. they'll all eventually get into the spirit and enjoy decorating
• ngl the office will probably look like a disaster to people outside of the group nshmsjk like, everyone has their own personal touch that they wanna add, whether it's for jokes or not. it's v chaotic but you wouldn't have it any other way<33
• the tree is huge btw, and it's absolutely covered in ornaments and tinsel
• Also!! going down to where Robotus is and decorating the basement!! at first both Reagan and Robotus are like?? what's the point???? but Robotus does appreciate it even if he doesn't admit it,, makes him feel included even if he isn't actually there
• like setting up fairy lights that change color, giving him his own tree, asking if there's anything he wants on the tree or what topper he wants
• convincing Reagan to give him Christmas movies to watch too!!
• omg you know that story where someone played what's new pussycat on a jukebox over and over with a different song in the middle??? Myc would do that and play all I want for Christmas is you on the speakers on repeat with one other Christmas song that plays after like 8 times. he's enjoying watching everyone go insane
• imagine walking by the office and just hearing "I don't want a lot for Christmas" and then everyone just collectively losing their shit hnshdkbd
• Glenn probably ends up breaking the speakers smnsksb everyone just sits there like,,, it's so quiet now,
• baking sugar cookies cut into Christmas shapes for the gang and bringing frosting and sprinkles so they can decorate them!!
• it either turns into a frosting war or a competition of who can decorate the best cookie ever. either way, wherever the decorating is happening, it won't stay clean
• also, the thought crossed my mind 'oh! what if they all baked together!!' and it seemed cute at first but then I realized that's a horrible idea shsnkdhk not just the kitchen, but the whole place would be a complete mess
• Brett comes in one day with a bunch of ugly sweaters that he picked for the group. at first everyone's like,, I don't wanna wear that, but he convinces them to, and they won't deny, he did a good job picking out sweaters for them
• getting presents for them is gonna be hard because Myc will absolutely try to read your mind and find out what you're getting everyone. everytime you're near him you have to distract yourself or actively think about other things
• he's teasing you like come onnn you know you wanna think about it~ it must be tiring thinking of all these other things~ just oneee little thought? I promise I won't tell<3
• I'm sure he doesn't care too much about Christmas, but he does appreciates the dedication you have to make sure what you got him stays a surprise. probably not a lot of people have done that
• spoiling everyone with presents!! they probably aren't used to it, or really done this with eachother (sure they've decorated the place a bit but not to this extent) so when they see presents under the tree they're like oh,,? we're supposed to get presents? and they start to! when Christmas arrives there's just a huge stack of presents for everyone
• always making sure everyone feels included and as happy as they can be
• like, I'm thinking,, I'm not sure about the others, but Brett and Reagan probably never really had a proper Christmas so like,,, I just wanna let them have a good, proper Christmas hmmgehrh,,,,,
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froggy-frogz · 16 days ago
Andre with a inexperienced and innocent s/o nsfw?🤨
A/N: When I first got this ask, it cracked me up cause of the emoji afdjhsdkfkhjs- But I hope you enjoy it!! Sorry, this took a couple of days. Writing nsfw asks always takes me a bit longer cause I get a lot and some are similar. Also, per usual, nsfw below so read at your own degression.
He doesn't mind if you're inexperienced. Hell, he doesn't mind at all.
Because you're inexperienced, that means Andre can experiment with you and figure out what you like.
But you add innocent to that? Dear Lord. Please help him. He's going to corrupt you. Either slowly over time or pretty quickly. There's no in-between.
He's going to have to teach you a lot of things, and seeing you so eager is going to turn him on majorly.
Andre's going to start slow, either with eating you out or vice versa.
If he's eating you out, he's going to be watching you. Not to make you flustered, but rather to gauge your reaction to when he hits/touches certain spots or to see how close you are.
If he's having you suck him off, be prepared for him to completely lose his shit. He's going to at first try to guide you, but once you get at it, it's just going to be a slur of curses and your name.
He's going to grip your hair or hold your hair depending on how he's feeling or just how long your hair is, it's going to help stabilize him.
Andre has a lot of experience with sex. It's canon in the show and look at him, he gets laid a lot.
Though, he won't ask you to use drugs during sex starting out. He's going to wait to do that, so when you two fuck you're going to get sober Andre for the first little bit.
The first couple times you two have sex, he's probably going to have you in some sort of position where he can see you. Not only to see your reactions but seeing you enjoy yourself really sets him off.
He's going to ask if you'd ride him and please please please say yes, it's one of his favorite positions. He can easily grab onto you where he wants and see you clearly? Win-win.
If you enter a relationship with Andre innocent and inexperienced, well, let's just say it's not going to say like that.
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cognitosclowns · 12 days ago
Oooo do you think you can do kissing headcanons for the whole gang 👁👁 ALSO YOUR WRITING IS SO GOOD PLS KEEP IT UP !!!
SURPRISINGLY SFW??? No cocks here smndsm
IM DOIN THIS,, AS like,, a single/a few kisses instead of making out!!
Pretty firm? She’s afraid of being Too gentle so expect some Teeth Clacking.
NOT VERY GOOD AT KISSING,,, she kisses Very Hard and doesn’t really move her lips a lot but,, GOD SHE GETS THIS LOVELY LOPSIDED SMILE AFTER <3
it’s worth it even if your lips hurt a bit after smnds.
He’s definitely more the type to give a Bunch of Small Kisses than one big kiss?? mostly bc he keeps smiling and breaking it
HE,, HAS A HABIT OF HOLDING YOUR CHEEKS?? Like his hand just,, gently cup your face?? <3
‘hi there <3′ with two little blinks when he pulls away. Grk. He’s very Sappy so expect some little comment about how nice that was <3
SHE GRINS INTO THE KISS <33 especially if you're the one initiating. The little ego boost of you wanting a kiss <33 how lovely
<3 raking her nails down either, or down your neck <333
She's not rushing!! Slow, purposeful. Definitely gonna <3 giggle a couple times from how Happy and Warm she feels!!
She's constantly drinking coffee but like,, Super Sugary Lattes? So she tastes like that <333
A few,, soft kisses on the corner of your lips, your cheeks, all around before finishing on your lips <33 a happy little 'i love you <3' is gonna get sprinkled in.
Messy messy messy. He never quite gets the lips, always either the corner, bottom lip, chin. Maybe it's cause he's smiling so much <3333
‘ooh~ are we,, gonna kiss rn?’ before giving you another kiss.
his hands mostly hold your clothes? He’s definitely a pull-you-in-by-the-lapels type of kisser. Takes you by surprise!
Tastes like how Neon Colors should taste?? Sweet and caffeinated and,, smth Indescribable that feels like Electricity Itself
CLUMSY <3 lots of nudged noses, a bit too much tongue. Very earnest though!! its so hard to kiss when you have a snout </3 pain of pains.
Surprisingly gentle?? He'd hate to accidentally nick you with one of his teeth.
Tastes like a distilled country song. Heavy smokey alcoholic flavor that makes your insides feel all warm <3
You’ll Definitely Get A Deep Giggle Outta Him if you come in for another one <333 HES NOT USED TO AFFECTION OK IT MAKES HIM KINDA SOFT <3
Without fail he cups your neck. even if it's just a little peck, his hand is gonna slip behind <333 you'll feel his thumb fiddling on your jaw.
His lips are also,, surprisingly soft?? granted there’s not a lot there but smdnsd at least its smooth.
The slightest smirk. Not only because he's enjoying himself, but,, there's something very Gratifying about feeling you kiss back <3 SMUG BASTARD.
Essentially tasteless, save for the Barest Hint of metal.
Oh lord this man is not used to kisses. Kiss The Orb, you'll get the most Flustered noises outta him
'What the hell is that for!?'
'Oh - sorry-'
'well don't STOP, je-sus.' he's a brat but <333 no he really really really likes kisses. It isn't smth he really Does with people so <3 expect some happy sighs and shivers
its,, maybe the only time he'll shut up.
Always A Bit Of Tongue. Even if it's just a swipe on the pull away. Cheeky bastard.
THOSE SHOULDERS MELTTT <333 his head even lolls a bit to the side, it's like an off switch
His Lips Are Both Thin AND Chapped! Double whammy sndsmdn
When he pulls back he gets this Lovely Tired Smile. his eyes get all,, half-lidded and soft. You can tell he <3 feels really safe when you kiss him.
‘just one? ;)’ he’s definitely gonna lean in for another <3 he’s pretty shameless most of the time.
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insidemalewife · 18 days ago
(drug use and implied sex)
(how the two of you got together/met, and sometime soon i'll do one where you meet the gang and find out what andre does for a living >:3)
i love this
you just seemed so average. but considering the kind of stuff andre does, how do you think y'all met 🤨🤨
what if one night andre got high out of his mind, but o no!! coincidentally there is absolutely no snacks at his house oopsies (fucker probably already ate it all but forgot). so!! he's gotta waddle his way to the grocery store :)
he absolutely loads DOWN with a shit ton of snacks, might as well buy the whole store at that rate.
you just so happen to work as a cashier at said grocery store!! so when high andre sees a hot person ringing up his items, he's just bound to hit on them 🙄🙄 he makes you laugh and blush with his "expert" flirting skills, and ends up just asking you if you wanna get high with him (obviously).
to his surprise, you said yes!! seeing as he was practically the only person left in the store since it was closing time, you basically just said fuck it and went home with a charming stranger.
the car ride was actually pretty nice, considering he was tripping balls. he had no shame when it came to singing loudly to whatever he had playing on the radio.
once you get to his house, you were surprised to find it decently clean, save for a few bongs, pills, empty snack/pop containers, etc. basically what you'd expect to see at his place.
the two of you settled on the couch and he didn't expect you to rip a FAT hit from the bong. after you got,,,,decently high you both let everything loose.
andre played loud music, switched on some funny little LED lights and you guys had an absolute blast. you were both in the middle of watching some random nature documentary (that frankly was quite interesting...) when andre casually asked if you wanted to yknow,,, make out,,,,
of course you said yes this dudes hot and the weed helped shake off the nerves (plz this is all consensually, even tho both parties are high they know what they're doing 😤). one thing led to another and you both ended up in his bed and >:))
the morning after, you woke up with your limbs tangled with his. once you were both fully fully awake, he asked to take you out for breakfast!!
the two of you hit it off and started seeing each other more and more, and that's how it led to you asking him out cuz he was too much of a pussy to do it <3
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insidethejob · 18 days ago
Y/n: Rules are made to be broken Reagan: Actually they were made to be followed. Nothing is made to be broken. Brett: Actually, babe has a point. Like piñatas- Andre: Dildo Glow sticks? Gigi: Karate boards? MYC: Fucking spaghetti when you have a small ass pot Y/n: Rules Reagan:.....
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hphm-stuff · 8 months ago
I have a handful of requests on the go, and I promise I'm working on them. I just have a bunch of school stuff that I'm working on right now. If you sent in a request, it's coming, I promise!
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ofeliahogwartsmystery · 10 months ago
Playing Gobstones #2
Talbott: It seems that the student surpassed the teacher! Now we should be alone again.
Mc: Because do you like me and you are afraid?
Talbott: *a mess all flushed* W-what did you say?
Mc: Come on, it was a joke!
*She turns around hiding his nerves*
Talbott: Yeah! A joke...
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