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Andrew Almost Stabs Nicky for the Thousandth Time - Part 2

(tw torture, child abuse, sexual abuse mention, suicide mention, knife and blood/injury mention)

Part 1

* * *

Neil turned his head as the door clicked open and Aaron walked in, his face flushed and a ghost of a smile on his lips. He’d been with Katelyn, no doubt. The smile disappeared the instant he saw Kevin’s face and worry filled his eyes when he followed Kevin’s gaze to the floor, where Neil was crouching in front of Nicky, tending to his neck.

“What the fuck happened?” he asked. “Neil what did you—“

“Shut up Aaron, I didn’t touch him,” Neil said before Aaron could accuse him of something. Neil turned back to Nicky. He had a smile on his face, but Neil could see past it. There was sill fear in his eyes, and his hands were still trembling.

“You’re doing that wrong,” Aaron pointed out, gesturing to the cotton pad Neil was using to clean Nicky’s cut. Neil ignored Aaron and looked at Nicky.

“Hey, Nicky,” he said, trying to get his attention from whatever world Nicky was in right now. He looked at Neil. “I’ll talk to him, okay?” Nicky shook his head.

“No, it was my fault, I shouldn’t have—“

“No, you shouldn’t have,” Neil cut in. “You shouldn’t have touched him. But Andrew can’t shove a knife against your throat every time you do something stupid. You’d be up against that wall all the time if he could,” Neil said, trying to get some sort of reaction from Nicky. It worked, and Nicky huffed a laugh. He was still shaken, but he’d relaxed slightly. “Are you going to be okay if I…” Neil trailed off, gesturing to the door. Nicky nodded.

“Yeah,” he said. “Go kick his ass for me,” he joked. Neil hadn’t seen Kevin move into the kitchen but when he came back he had a tub of ice cream and a spoon in his hands. He walked over to Nicky.

“What?” Nicky gasped. “No vegetables?” Kevin glared but shoved the tub of ice cream to him. Neil stood and turned to Aaron. He threw the bottle of disinfectant to him as he made his way toward the door.

“You do it properly, then, Doctor,” Neil said, finally answering Aaron’s comment from before. Aaron only levelled a sneer his way and walked over to Nicky.

* * *

Andrew was sitting on the edge of the roof, his legs dangling off the side of the building and a cigarette burning between his fingers. He didn’t turn at the sound of the door clicking open. Neil cleared his throat in case Andrew hadn’t heard and approached slowly. Andrew didn’t pass Neil a cigarette like he usually might’ve, but he didn’t object when Neil grabbed the packet next to him, took one out and lit it. Neil sat where the packet had been, keeping his distance from Andrew and letting his own legs hang in the cool afternoon air. Andrew let the smoke escape his mouth. Neil took note of the tremble in Andrew’s fingers. He thought back to his first trip to Columbia with the monsters, when he’d first witnessed Andrew going trough withdrawal from his medication. It had been the first time Neil had seen Andrew looking weak. Andrew flicked a rock off the ledge and watched it fall.

“It’d be easy, wouldn’t it? Tragic, too. Perfect end for a traumatised Fox like me, no?” Andrew pulled one knee up to his chest and puffed on his cigarette. Neil breathed in the smoke of his own cigarette and tried not to imagine watching another person he loved die. He’d seen enough of that already.

“If you wanted to die, you’d have done it already,” Neil shrugged, looking out over the campus. “So there has to be something you want to live for.” A moment of comfortable silence fell between them like a blanket over the troubles of the day. Andrew’s next words were quiet, like he didn’t quite want to say them.

“You,” he said. Neil snapped his head to Andrew. He hadn’t been expecting that bit of honesty. “And Aaron, and Kevin and even fucking Nicky,” he said, stubbing out his cigarette. Neil did the same and shifted closer to Andrew, but still kept his distance.

“Why?” he asked. Andrew knew what he meant. Why’d you react so badly?

“He touched me without my permission,” Andrew said. That was enough, Neil understood. But he’d seen the way Andrew’s eyes had shifted at Nicky’s words. He knew there was more to it than that.

“When my dad found out I was ticklish,” Neil started, and it got Andrew’s attention, “he had—he had Lola run knives all over my body. Any time I flinched, or squirmed or laughed, the knives would cut me, just slightly. Every day until I could keep still with a straight face. It took three weeks,” Neil finished. Andrew’s eyes raked Neil’s torso like he could see the scars underneath. He nodded. Andrew knew what Neil was asking. I gave you something, now you give me something. Andrew knew, just like Neil did, that he didn’t have to return the favour. That if he decided he didn’t want to talk about it, Neil wouldn’t push. But Andrew watched his trembling hands for a moment and looked back at Neil.

“Drake found out I was ticklish,” he said simply. Neil felt the words like a blow to the gut, even if he’d been expecting just as much. He nodded. Andrew turned and laid along the concrete ledge, one of his legs still hanging. Neil lit his cigarette again, breathing in the acrid smell of the smoke.

“Nicky’s pretty shaken,” Neil said. Andrew blindly threw another rock off the edge and Neil watched it miss a student on the ground by a few inches.

“I warned him.”

“You can’t keep putting a knife to Nicky’s throat when he does something dumb.”

“Don’t tell me what to do, Junkie.”

“I can’t.”

“What?” Andrew sat up, shoving his hands in the pocket of his hoodie and staring at Neil.

“I don’t know how many times you’ve told me I can’t put a leash on you. I don’t want to,” Neil said. Andrew raised his eyebrows. “I can’t tell you what to do and I don’t want to tell you what to do.” Neil thought back to the day Andrew had put Neil’s hand on his chest. I won’t be like them, Neil had said. I won’t let you let me be. Neil knew Andrew was thinking it too. “He needs to know something, even the smallest amount, or one day, Nicky’s gonna grow a spine and he’s going to walk away.”

“That’ll be his choice, then,” Andrew said.

“And you’ll let someone that’s supposedly one of your reasons to live go just like that?”

“One down, three to go,” Andrew said, locking eyes with Neil. He’d been holding four fingers up but now there were only three.

“No,” Neil said. Andrew blinked. “You’re not getting rid of me, Drew.” Neil stood and walked closer to Andrew, but stayed out of arm’s reach. “I’ve been running my whole life. I’m tired of it. I’m not running anymore. Not from you.” Neil waited for Andrew to say something, and after a while he started to think that maybe he should have kept his mouth shut. Neil wasn’t very good at doing that, though. Finally, Andrew stood, leaving only inches between him and Neil.

“What would you have me say to Nicky?” Andrew asked, like he didn’t really care for the answer.

“I- you don’t need to tell him why. Not really, anyway. I think just be real with him, Drew. Sit him down and tell him that he needs to respect your boundaries and you don’t want him to touch you unless he specifically asks.”

“I’ve told him,” Andrew responded dryly.

“With a knife to his throat.”

“That should get the message across clearly enough, I think.”

“Andrew,” Neil said because he knew not to say please. That seemed to get Neil’s message across clearly enough, because Andrew took the cigarette—almost burnt down to the butt—from Neil’s hand and let it drop to the ground.

“What are you tired of running from?” Andrew asked. There was a glint of something in Andrew’s eyes then. He wasn’t used to asking for help, but Neil thought this was something close to that. Andrew was admitting something—that he needed Neil.

“Reality,” Neil said. “I’m not used to being a real person. You proved to me that I could be. With you.” Andrew looked away, like the statement was too heavy to bare right now.

“Yes or no?” Andrew asked. Neil furrowed his brow, confused.

“Yes,” he said anyway. Andrew nodded.

“I don’t want to be touched right now,” Andrew said. It was Neil’s turn to nod this time, and as he did so, he shoved his hands in his pockets. Andrew took his own hands out of his hoodie and placed one on Neil’s chest, using it like a spacer between them as he leant and kissed Neil.

Andrew tasted like smoke and vanilla and Neil had to clench his hands into fists in his pocket to stop himself from reaching for Andrew, from pulling him closer and kissing him deeper. When Andrew finally broke away, he handed Neil his lighter and the pack of cigarettes in his pocket.

“I’ll talk to Nicky,” he said. Neil nodded. As Andrew made his way to the door that would lead him downstairs, he glanced back at Neil.

“Don’t run away, Rabbit.” Neil only sent him a two fingered salute in return.

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hc that andrew’s really good at drawing, and bc of his eidetic memory, he can depict scenes perfectly. he didn’t draw much when he was on his meds, but got back into it when he was sober again. here are some memories i think he would recreate:

  • the “you know, i get it” speech (this one is a kaleidoscope of colours bc of his drugged state)
  • neil at ground level, andrew’s cigarette between his lips, giving andrew a mock salute (that scene right after andrew returns from easthaven)
  • seeing neil’s scars for the first time
  • aaron and nicky dancing, carefree, at eden’s
  • bee’s glass figurines (he adds to this drawing every time he gets her a new one)
  • sparring with renee
  • neil sitting on the ground at the foxhole court after calling andrew during his panic attack
  • neil leaning over the bus seat
  • matt grinning during an exy game
  • neil at the baltimore reunion (the rest of the foxes are blurs in this one because he only had eyes for neil)
  • sleepy neil curled up in the beanbag chair
  • allison and renee curled up beside each other
  • kevin coming in, drunk, with his new tattoo 
  • nicky and erik hugging when erik came as a surprise
  • kevin and wymack right before the final match
  • riko with his racquet raised above neil (he wasn’t going to draw this one, but he couldn’t get the moment out of his head and thought it might help to get it down on paper)
  • aaron smiling for a split second at a sarcastic comment andrew made
  • neil, yawning and wearing andrew’s hoodie
  • matt ruffling neil’s hair
  • allison painting renee’s nails
  • neil sitting on the rooftop, the sunset setting his hair ablaze
  • ice cream at sweetie’s (no cracker packets in this memory)
  • the first goal robin blocked during a game
  • neil on facetime, staring at andrew like he could never get enough
  • the first house that andrew could really call home 
  • sir and king climbing all over neil
  • neil and kevin wearing olympic medals
  • neil and andrew’s hands linked together
  • aaron and his family when they come over for dinner
  • neil, soaking wet and laughing during a watergun fight in their backyard
  • neil, smiling and happy and home

i’d like to think that, when andrew feels ready to show neil his drawings, they hang them up around their home. and when the foxes come over, they’re in awe at the memories and the love that is captured in the artwork, but they know not to say anything. dan gives them pictures, though, to hang up alongside the drawings, and they do

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bets on Neil wearing an apron to his and Andrew’s mini wedding

  • Aaron is the first one to notice
  • He doesnt say shit though because he got distracted by Katelyn a second after noticing
  • Kevin watched Neil put it on over his suit and has spent every moment since trying to figure out how he managed to not notice
  • He had a rerun of an exy game playing and was more focused on that then getting ready for his own wedding
  • Matt, Dan and Allison all make their bets on when Neil would notice
  • Renee wanted to tell Neil but was begged not to
  • Katelyn noticed last minute and tried to tell Neil before Andrew or the priest noticed
  • She failed
  • The second Neil saw Andrew he stopped paying attention to anyone around him
  • Andrew could do nothing but stare, second guessing this decision to marry the dumbass in an apron
  • He doesnt even cook, where did Neil get the apron from?
  • Matt wins the bet, Neil didn’t notice until the ceremony was over
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I wish Kevin Day a perfect Day because its what he deserves 😚

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You ever just sitting there, minding your own business then remember the Minyard twins exists

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Neil: many people are only alive because it’s illegal to shoot them

The foxes:

Neil: and Riko is a perfect example as he just died by a gun like a minute ago and it was the mafia that killed him

Nicky, gasps: his own brother

Neil, nodding: his own brother

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I present to you, Neil doing the small waist, pretty face with a big bank challenge while Andrew watches and internally screams

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foxhole court is probably the best thing that happened to me this month, i’m absolutely in love with this story

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Can someone tell me how long it takes to drive from Palmetto to Columbia because I have no idea and it’s been bothering me for weeks.

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Sobs did I imagine the short thingy nora wrote about andrew’s pov to neil being kidnapped? i cant find it anywhere :((

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andrew brings out the heart eyes when he sees neil sleeping next to him looking all sleep rumpled and soft, scars and auburn hair highlighted under the ray of the morning sun. neil bristles and squints at him. once his vision clears, he takes in the face attached to the warm body next to him and immediately plasters on a blinding smile “hey”. andrew smiles internally as he mutters “idiot” under his breath.

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no one else is in the dorm, just andrew and neil. they’re in the living room, sitting on the couch. there’s a little coffee table that neil’s doing his maths homework on and andrew has his feet in neil’s lap. he’s watching a sitcom that he doesn’t find funny–he’s just watching it so he can be with neil while doing Something. he’s also eating chips that kevin would freak out over if he knew about them. he’s watching neil more than the sitcom, really. neil’s oblivious, like, criminally so. he’s got his pencil between his teeth while his fingers tap at the problem he can’t solve. (this is kinda a date night-in situation, matt says. neil says that to andrew after matt goes away and andrew gives him a flat stare: shut up.) (andrew wishes for a second that neil would kiss him instead of doing his stupid math equations.)

#one hour later neil puts away his books and stretches and andrew's eyes go to the skin that shows where neil's shirt rose#neil gives andrew A Look and smirks. andrew: don't fucking look at me like that#neil: oh but you like it / andrew: shut up i'll kill you / neil: sure sure / andrew: one hundred and fifteen neil#neil on all fours above andrew: ohhh a whole one hundred and fifteen huh. and then he asks 'yes or no 'drew?'#(bc neil calls him drew sometimes and you can pry that from my cold dead hands)#andrew says 'yes' but they only kiss for a while with neil's hand against the armrest and andrew's hands under neil's shirt#before neil says his back hurts and andrew makes space between his body and the couch oh-so subtlely but of course#mr neil eyes-for-andrew-joseph-minyard notices and squeezes himself into that space. for a while he's stiff until andrew rolls his eyes and#takes his hand and puts it on his torso. neil obviously warms at that and swallows hard and doesn't talk for the rest of the night.#andrew watches him fall asleep and even tho he gets uncomfortable at some point around 8pm he doesnt get up.#he does get up however when kevin's keys jingle at the door and him coming in would wake neil up anyway.#i was going to study but then i had this thought i was like oh i have to share it#andrew minyard#neil josten#andreil#andreil just being incredibly soft with each other because both of them deserve some good gentle love in their lives#i think about soft andreil a lot like. an unhealthy amount (it might just be that i want someone to be soft with me)#aftg#all for the game being soft agenda
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“He ended up in the dead center of the room, with Andrew on one side of him and Matt on the other. His thoughts should have kept him up all night, but with his friends this close Neil couldn’t worry about anything. Neil studied Andrew’s face until he couldn’t keep his eyes open anymore.
He dreamed of facing his father on an Exy court, and in his dream the Foxes won.”
The King’s Men, Chapter 14

please do not use, edit or post my art to other sites.

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one of my favorite things is when my leftist twitter timeline is broken up by horny as fuck atfg tweets~~

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