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#anger

Angry and Rebuking Rant

Im going to begin by saying that i really do appreciate the altruism and extended generosity people are expressing to help with those whom are struggling during this epidemic as a result of income loss.

However, i would also like to point out those among you whom proclaim such generosity with no substance or action and only do this to boast publically upon ones social media.

“Ask me for help!” Posts

Some of you already know those who require help. Some people needed help before all this began.

These boasters proclaim publically that they have resources to offer and to “just ask for them”.

Same people who saw the suffering of the lame, the invalid, the impoverished, the homeless, the queer, the parentless, the jobless, purposeless, those without direction or resource to support them or their kin and these people proclaim anemity but offered nothing before the strife.

Now it is a time to act and a time to help and they demand pleads and grovelling from those who suffer greatly. From their friends who suffer greatly. Friends…

I have caught my peers and my friends from hitting the cold tile because they could not afford food. They could not afford medication. They could not afford rent or electricity. They fell to their knees for their eyes spun the world beneath them and their stomachs turned from emptiness.

“Dont send me home. I need the money. Dont call the hospital i cannot afford it.”

Where were you when they were dying on their feet in uniform on aisle 3? Where were you when their child snacked on stale buttered bread so they do not cry in pain all night? Where were you when their nieces and nephews and sons and daughters suffered convulsions from polluted and tainted water?

You say you have resources to give. You say you are here to help.

Help whom?

People suffered before this calamity, why did you not extend your resources and generosity then? Why do you proclaim now that you are here to help?

I have lost friends to poverty and despair. They have lost children to untreated infection and malnourishment. We have all lost someone because they were without.

Without resource. Without electricity. Without money. Without food or water. They were without love and compassion and suffered ruin and abandon.

Where the fuck were you then?

If you have and have had the resources, why didnt you help them then?

Why should i believe that you will help now?

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and the sunlight touches every atom of this room -

even in the shadows that pool beneath your eyes,

even in the darkness of your mind;

it drips in through your ears,

an esoteric blood transfusion,

ichor for you to consume.


there are words, I think, that flow like water;

words that storm the sun.

they will penetrate the ice of me,

wear down the broken barriers of my lips,

unspool and leak across the floorboards,

already warped and scuffed and creaking,

absorbing this piecemeal dictionary from me.


refinishing the wood won’t matter in a flood

but at least the floors

will shine.

- home renovations, k.e.m.

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Do you ever laugh when you’re angry

but it’s a fake, harsh kind of laughter, and it just makes you ma d der because you still want to punch something but somehow this whole situation is amusing yet you’re pissed as fuck

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There was something about that person that you just couldn’t stand.

Mostly, it seems, they had something you wanted so badly but could never have, and that is what filled you with a seething feeling everytime you saw them.

You couldn’t bear to see them around anymore, alive, so you took matters into your own hands. You put them out of their misery to alleviate your own.

Jealousy works up an appetite, though. Their parts were strewn among the blood-stained tiles of the floor as you daintily ate them. Crimson fingers pulling off thin sheets of flesh, blood brushing at your lips as you ate the bits of the tender limbs and body parts. It tasted just fine, rather good. At least it was enough to soothe the empty pit in your stomach.

But did it soothe the empty cavity of your heart?

In a way, maybe, by eating them, you could absorb their essence, attain all those things you’d envied them for, all for yourself. Now that their body would merge with yours, now that you were one being, maybe you could finally be better than them.

But maybe it’s just wishful thinking.

You wonder if anyone will miss them.

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I really just need to vent for once with someone who isn’t going to make me try to feel better or give me coping mechanisms just someone who’s going to be just as pissed as I am about my situation and just tell me my feelings are valid instead of telling me not to feel mad because of the things going on in the world around me so much worse and I don’t have it that bad. I’m allowed to be mad and I need someone to be on my side and just to see how shit my position is right now. I know so many people have it worse but this was supposed to be my time and it’s being taken away

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foreagText

I’m so angry right now. I hate work so much right now and I wish you were here to talk to. You were always the one who would understand, laugh at everyone’s stupidity, and talk me through it all. I miss you so much. It’s not fair. We had so much to accomplish. I love you.

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When the last person stepped through the door, Yoongi simply flicked his wrist and the door shut behind the last person in. Everyone awed at this, their eyes even sparking as they watched Yoongi strut right up to the door. Pointing out his index finger and middle finger, a soft glow of a purple light shined at the end of Yoongi’s fingers. Moving his hand swiftly, a bright purple symbol glows brighty as Yoongi continues to draw what seems to be his signature in thin air.

“I, shadow witch Min Yoongi, here by place a soul protect on this apartment so no meister can detect a single soul in this place of comfort,” Yoongi says softly before there was a flash of light, the symbol almost burned into the doorway. It was a simple signature, a signature that only the witch Min Yoongi could write. The writing on the door glows a soft purple, the color so soft it had to be considered pastel.

Wiping his hands on his pants, Yoongi turned to face open mouths and wide eyes. He let out a shy chuckle before he was scratching at the back of his neck, a habit he picked up on when he found himself nervous. With flushed cheeks and a shy smile, Yoongi could only wish to curl in on himself and make himself smaller than he already was. He took in a deep breath before exhaling softly through his nose. He took a step back and let his eyes fall closed, his heart hammering against his chest, the palm of his hands beginning to sweat.

“Soul protect release.” There was a sudden blast of magic, nothing too strong where it could knock anything cover, but it did send shivers down the other meister’s spines. Only people who could wield weapons, the meisters, could see how big a human soul was. The poor weapons could only follow blindly as their meister’s trembled at the sight of the strongest of souls.

Yoongi wasn’t an exception either.

They watched as dark markings formed on Yoongi’s arms, neck, and face, his once chocolate eyes turning to their soft pastel purple, the same color the symbol glows behind him. His hair changed as well, the left side of his hair turning as black as darkest of nights; the right side as white as freshly fallen snow.

Shadow like tattoos formed on the tops of his hands, his fingernails now longer, sharper, the nails even painted black. Shadow like tattoos formed on his neck, the tattoos even going up so far that they ended on his face, curling slightly, but not too noticeably. The marking were just as dark as the night sky on the darkest of nights, the black so black that Sangwoo was whining about wanting something that dark.

And the piercings, don’t even get Jimin started on that. He had a septum piercing, a bridge piercing, a labret piercing, and an eyebrow piercing. Of course his ears were pierced as well, but Jimin found his eyes locked on the piercing that littered Yoongi’s soft features. Even with all these changes, Yoongi was still Yoongi, the man Jimin fell for.

There was a long silence before it was completely shattered by everyone screaming, Yoongi even jumping back at how started he actually was. It wasn’t screams of fright thought, it was screams of pure amusement and joy. They weren’t scared of him, they even looked proud of Yoongi for finally getting comfortable in his own skin and showing them the real him. If it was just him and Jimin, Yoongi was sure there would have been a few stray tears.

“You look so badass, hyung!” Jeongguk yelled as he looked in awe, his eyes blow out wide as he smiled so, so, so brightly at him.

“The tattoos look amazing as well,” both Sangwoo and Hoseok piped in at the same time. “Jinx! You own me a kiss on the lips!” They giggled some more before pressing a quick peck on each other’s awaiting lips.

Namjoon was nodding his head in approval, a fond smile pulled at the corner of his lips as he held a finger up to his chin. He was admiring the tattoos, his eyes starting Yoongi down as if he was getting every last detail he could get.

Jin was smiling as well, but there was sadness behind the smile, his eyes dark and his shoulders slumped forward as if he had the weight of the world on his shoulders. All he could do was mutter out something that shook Yoongi to his very core.

“I’m so sorry, Yoongi.”

Yoongi stood there frozen, his eyes blown out wide as he start deep into his hyung’s eyes, pain and guilt swimming deep in those dark eyes of Jin. Yoongi maybe the witch there, but it felt as if Jin had cast a spell of him and Yoongi didn’t have a single spell in his books to get him out of that one.

There was a gentle hand on his shoulder within seconds and Yoongi let the familiar perfume wash over him like a crashing wave. Jimin was always there for Yoongi, even when he didn’t ask him to. He really was blessed with a caring weapon and caring friends. If he hadn’t been paired up with Jimin, he honestly thinks he would have found himself six feet under thanks to the monsters the lerk deep within his mind. He really was lucky to have Park Jimin in his life.

“Why don’t you show us all your witchy things, Yoongi hyung,” Jimin smiles softly, the hand on Yoongi’s shoulder tightening for just a second before he felt the same hand grab his own and entwine their fingers together. Safe and sound, something Yoongi was still getting use to still.

“Yes, let me show you my witchy wardrobe.”

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

A sound soul

Dwells within a sound mind

And a sound body

.

. .

. . .

The DWMA is was widely know around the world, even in Korea. Every child wanted to be either a weapon or a meister, but only a select few were blessed with such a golden opportunity. These students were admitted into the DWMA as soon as they could walk and talk, many of them not showing any signs of weapon form till years on. Yoongi was a meister, a scythe mister to be exact. How is he going to feel when he finds out there is only one in the school and the kid just so happens to be fucking annoying?

🖤 20/?

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This emptiness that slithers into my veins slowly crawls into the pit of my stomach,
a flatline of response, a demise of emotions.
As your words infect the air, hundreds of miles away, I am struck by a sentiment of ferocity,
a wrath that swims into my effervescent heart, binding one beat at a time.
Yet, this sensation is instantly disdained, and I sit here pondering,
what am I really afraid of?

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I’m not safe, I’m a danger to myself. I’m not safe, I’m a danger to myself. I’m not safe, I’m a danger to myself. I’m not safe, I’m a danger to myself. I’m not safe, I’m a danger to myself. I’m not safe, I’m a danger to myself. I’m not safe, I’m a danger to myself. I’m not safe, I’m a danger to myself. I’m not safe I’m a danger to myself. I’m not safe I’m a danger to myself. Letsrememberher I’m not safe, I’m a danger to myself. I’m not safe, I’m a danger to myself. I’m not safe, I’m a danger to myself. I’m not safe I’m a danger to myself. I’m not Safe, I’m a danger to myself. I’m not SAFE IM A DANGER TO MYSELF. She hurt us. I’m not safe . I’m a danger to myself I’m a danger to myself I’m a danger to myself I’m a danger to myself I’m a danger to myself. I’m not scared. I’m going to hurt myself. I’m not scared I’m a danger to myself. I’m not safe I’m a danger to myself. I’m angry. She hurt me. I’m angry. I’m alone. Liar liar liar liar liar liar liar liar liar liar why why why why why. I’m not safe I’m a danger to myself helpme I’m not safe I’m a danger to myself I’m not safe I’m a danger to myself I’m not safe I’m a danger to myself. I’m not scared I’m not safe. I’m going to hurt myself.

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