#angst au | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

theladyofdeath · 10 months

Text

Better or Worse {17}

Nessian. Angst. Modern AU.

@snelbz x @theladyofdeath collab

Better or Worse Masterlist

A/N: Thank you to all of those who have continued to read! We have loved writing this story and cannot believe it's about to come to a close.

*WARNING: NSFW, 18+ READERS ONLY.*

I don’t remember the last time my sisters and I had the afternoon to ourselves. No kids, no husbands, just the three Archeron girls.

And about eight hundred dresses.

Elain’s eyes are already shining with tears, her new mama hormones just as powerful as the pregnancy hormones, while Feyre looks like she’s on a mission.

The consultant, a pretty girl named Justine, met us at the door and showed us to the changing rooms we’d been assigned before asking me what my vision was for our vow renewal. As she hurried off to look for dresses that fit the ceremony of my dreams, she gave my sisters free reign to pick out one or two dresses of their own.

I’m not sure what to think about getting a second wedding dress. My first wedding dress was cheap, something I found online, but I loved it. Simple, fitted, but gorgeous. It was perfect for our casual beach wedding. It’s been sitting in an upstairs closet for the past decade.

Feyre and Elain come back to the dressing rooms at the same time, multiple gowns draped over their arms.

“Okay, rule,” I begin as they start hanging them up. “We show each other everything, even if we look ridiculous.”

“Fair,” Elain agrees, sitting next to me on a plush bench. “We should have fun. We won’t be doing this again until the kids are grown and planning their weddings.”

At the mention of Nyx and Sera growing up, Elain tears up, but she quickly shakes it off. She left the baby with Azriel and is having serious separation anxiety.

I squeeze her hand.

“Remember when we went dress shopping for my wedding?”

As soon as the question leaves Feyre’s mouth, Elain and I burst into a fit of laughter. The most hideous green dress pops into my mind that Feyre nearly had us wear just to play a prank on her soon-to-be husband, but in the end we went with the sleek navy blue gowns that Feyre just couldn’t pass up.

But shit, those green dresses were awful. They reminded us of something her ex may have wanted in his wedding…which added to the reasons why Feyre had left him.

Poor taste. In everything.

“Those blue dresses were stunning, though,” Elain says, eyes soft. “You were stunning.”

“Very few brides can pull off a black dress,” I agree, “but you were perfect.”

Feyre smiles, remembering it all. “Yeah, it was a perfect dress. Too bad Rhys ripped it to shreds the second the reception was over.”

Elain barks a laugh as I shake my head. “He would destroy something so beautiful without a second thought. He’s insane.”

“Which is why she married him.” Elain winks.

Feyre doesn’t deny it as her grin grows and turns just a little bit wicked.

“Someone had to marry a madman, may as well be me,” Feyre jokes.

But I shake my head. “I don’t know. Beneath all that calm demeanor, we all know Az is a freak.”

Elain’s cheeks redden at my words, but she doesn’t deny it which makes Feyre howl.

Justine returns with three dresses, two of which I immediately know will be going in the reject pile, but true to my word, I try them on.

“Tell me about your husband,” Justine says, fanning out the train and handing me a large mirror so I can see the back. The dress is atrocious, all puffy sleeves and layers upon layers upon layers of tulle. I look like a cake topper and based on Feyre and Elain’s constant smirking, they agree.

I ignore them, answering Justine. “He’s handsome, kind, strong, loyal. A bit of a goofball, but it’s one of the things I love about him. I can be a bit too serious, sometimes, so he balances me out.”

“And how did you meet?”

And so goes most of the appointment. She brings dress after dress, most of which don’t fit my style, but I politely try them on, answering her questions, while constantly thinking of my dress at home.

I idly wonder if I can still fit in it, something I mention to my sisters while we have a moment alone.

“I sure as hell wouldn’t fit in mine anymore,” Elain sighs, patting the small belly she hasn’t been quite able to get rid of since Sera was born. “Hips are wider, belly is bigger, and don’t even get me started on these boobs.”

I laugh, feeling the jealousy poke its head up but ignoring it until it dissipates on its own.

“And my dress no longer exists…” Feyre sighs, rolling her eyes in the most loving way.

“I might try it on tonight,” I say, playing with one of the ties of the dressing robe I’m wearing. “Just to see if it still fits.”

“Do you want to wear it again?” Elain asks, examining the fit of the lavender dress in the mirror in front of her. “Rather than get a new dress?”

Pursing my lips, I look at the mountains of lace and beading and silk around us. “No,” I admit. “This is sort of a new beginning for us. These vows are to show how far we’ve come and how strong we are. I love my old dress, but I think I need something new for this new chapter.”

Both Feyre and Elain are nodding, understanding on their faces, just as Justine comes back with two more dresses. Feyre sighs and leans back on the couch she’s curled up on. “One thing is for sure. If you do still fit in your original dress, Cassian is going to lose his shit when he sees you.”

The hanger on one of the dresses Justine was hanging by my dressing room door clatters against the wall before she drops the garment to the floor. The noise pauses our conversation as she hastily reaches down and picks the dress back up.

“I’m sorry, I’m so clumsy,” she mutters, clearing her throat. Hanging the dresses up, she turns around and looks at me in the reflection. Her look isn’t appraising, it isn’t the same look she gave me earlier when we were discussing dress shapes. This is an inspection. Her eyes start at the top of my head, where my hair is braided in a coronet, down to the tips of my toes, painted in a deep red color.

“It’s fine,” I say, slowly.

She doesn’t seem to hear me as her eyes trail back up my body. “At least you’re pretty.”

I hesitate. “Pardon?”

She clears her throat and I swear the smile she paints on her mouth is forced. “I was just saying how beautiful you are. All of these dresses will look lovely on you.”

I slowly look at my sisters in the reflection of the mirror, but they’re watching Justine with equal confusion.

With a halfhearted promise that she’ll be just around the corner if we need her, she’s gone, leaving my sisters and I to stare after her in a stunned silence.

“Okay, well,” Feyre says, jumping to her feet and clearing the awkward tension. “Let’s see these dresses that will look lovely on you.”

Rolling my eyes, I grab the one she dropped and head into the dressing room.

I end up leaving without a dress. Nothing stood out to me, nothing grabbed my eye like my original dress did. After leaving the dress store, we ended up at a Mexican restaurant, where Elain relented to peer pressure and had exactly half of a margarita. Nine months of not drinking killed her tolerance and she’s a giggling mess as I drop her and Feyre off at her house.

When I make it back home, the house is silent and empty, except for Greg who is fast asleep on the couch, snoring soundly.

After kicking off my shoes and setting my keys and purse aside, I hurry up the stairs into the spare bedroom. In the back of the closet, stuffed into a zipped up bag, is my wedding dress.

I haul it out — an unnerving amount of dust clouding in the air — and set it on the unmade guest bed. I don’t know why, but I find that I’m nervous. Maybe it’s more of excitement, but the feeling that floods my core has my fingers trembling as I reach for the zipper.

When I pull out the dress, it’s exactly like I remember it.

It’s white, of course, but the lace covering the bodice has a hint of blush to it, just enough to notice. The back is completely open, while the sweetheart neckline is held up by thin, dainty straps. Fitted through the waist and hips, it gently flares out before reaching the floor.

I love it just as much as I did the day I wore it to marry my best friend.

Before I realize what I’m doing, I’m taking off my clothes and whipping the dress off its hanger.

I’m surprised when it easily slips on. I slide my arms through the straps and shimmy the dress over my hips. There’s a zipper on the side and I only have to tug and suck in once before it’s fully zipped.

When I look in the mirror, I suck in a breath. Suddenly, I see myself on the beach, looking into Cassian’s eyes as he says his vows. Ten years is a long time, but I remember it like it was yesterday.

A door closes downstairs and then I hear Cassian’s carrying up to me.

“Nes?”

“Shit.” Cursing under my breath, I quickly hurry across the hall to our room and then into our bathroom, closing the door behind me. My hair, thanks to the dozen or so dresses I tried on today, is an absolute mess. I pull the bobby pins out and haphazardly run my fingers through it, doing my best to make it presentable again. A knock sounds on the door just as I drop the last pin on the counter.

“You okay?”

With a deep breath, more nerves in my stomach now than ten years ago, I open the door.

Whatever Cass had been planning to say fades into nothing as his jaw drops and his eyes drag down my body and up again. I’m surprised to see silver lining his eyes when he meets my gaze again.

“You are so beautiful.”

Emotion clogs my throat and I look down at the counter, feeling my cheeks burn. “Thank you.”

“You look as beautiful today as you did the first time I saw you in that dress.” He steps closer and lifts my chin.

I meet his eyes and the emotion dwelling within them is overwhelming. My vision blurs and he wipes away a tear that escapes down my cheek. There was a time that I would have felt foolish in a situation such as this, but I don’t. I feel completely loved, in every possible way by this man in front of me.

“I just wanted to see if it still fits,” I say, although my voice breaks.

His smile is so soft that it makes my knees weak. “Oh, it fits,” he says, and his eyes graze my body, making my heart beat just a little bit quicker. His eyes linger in all the right places before I step forward and slide my arms around his neck. His hands run down my sides and rest on my hips.

“I love you,” I breathe, and he kisses me.

Cassian has kissed me in a million different ways throughout the years, but there’s something precious about a sweet, gentle kiss. It’s the kind of kiss he gives me now and the sincerity of it, the promise of it, nearly has me going limp in his arms.

“Did you find your dress today?” He asked, his lips leaving my own for a moment to find my temple.

I shake my head. “No, none of them were the one.”

“You’ll find it, baby,” he says, stepping behind me, wrapping his arms around my waist and gazing at our reflection in the mirror. The image it creates is laughable, my wedding dress contrasting with the sweats and hoodie he wore over to Rhysand’s, but it doesn’t matter. What we’re wearing, what we look like, none of it matters. It doesn’t matter if I wear a two thousand dollar ball gown, my first wedding dress, or one of Cassian’s old hoodies, being with him, reaffirming our love for each other, that’s all that matters.

“I love you,” I tell his reflection, repeating my words from earlier, because I feel like I need to make up for all of our lost time, all the days he didn’t hear me say it.

His lips find my neck. “And I love you.”

The deep rumble of his voice against my skin has my eyes closing, tipping my head to the side to give him better access. I feel the zipper at my side coming loose and can’t stop the smirk from forming on my lips.

The dress pools at my feet and I know I should carry it back across the hall, put it back in its bag, and return it to its place in the back of the closet.

But I don’t.

Instead I luxuriate in the feeling of Cassian’s large hands cupping my breasts, the way he rolls my nipples under his thumbs in tandem with his tongue on my throat. I can’t stop the soft moan that falls from my lips.

Behind me, I can feel the evidence of what the little sound does to him.

I watch his eyes open and darken as they meet mine in our reflection. I can tell he grins as he bites the tender spot at the base of my throat, and this time when I let out a moan, one hand slides down my abdomen and finds its place between my thighs, beneath my panties. His finger teases me, running between my folds again and again, as Cassian whispers, “Beautiful.”

I try to rock my hips, try to signal my need for his fingertips against my throbbing clit, but he takes his hands off of me. Before I can protest, he’s picking me up and carrying me into our bedroom.

Instead of throwing me on the bed in a fit of passion, as he usually does, he lays me down gently. My head falls against the pillow as our eyes meet, and there’s such a yearning, such a devotion staring back at me that it has me feeling emotional, yet again. I say nothing. Neither does he.

He simply pushes himself back on his knees and pulls off his hoodie, then his t-shirt before leaning over me and kissing me, slowly. Our tongues brush as our lips open and move. He takes my hands in his and brings them over my head against the pillow.

Our kisses grow heavier and I need more. I need more of his mouth on mine, more of his skin on mine.

With my heels I push down his sweats and we work them off together, and eventually it’s just our bodies lined up as one, perfectly as always.

He pushes in, slowly, my legs wrapping around his waist until he’s fully seated inside me. With my hands pressed into the pillow above me, I’m completely at his mercy, pinned there under his adoring gaze. His hips draw back, leaving me empty and needy before pushing back in. Cassian swallows my moan with another tender kiss and before I know it, I’m gasping beneath him as he makes love to me.

If the past few months have taught me nothing else, it’s the different ways my husband worships my body. He’s fucked me, dominated me, let me take the lead. But there’s nothing that makes me feel as cherished and desired not for my body, but for my heart as when he makes love to me, our souls becoming one for those few minutes.

Giving myself over to the pleasure of the moment, I let my eyes fall closed and focus on the feel of him moving in me, on me, around me, and allow the emotion building in my chest to grow.

“I love you,” he breathes, peppering my face with kisses as he thrusts in and pulls out. His lips trail down my neck to my breasts and I’m unable to stop the moan this time as his tongue flicks over my sensitive nipples, playing with the jewelry there.

I want to tell him that I love him too, but I’ve momentarily forgotten how to form words. I’m lost in him, completely consumed in all that he’s giving to me. My legs around his waist tighten as he quickens his pace. His tongue plays with my nipple only for a moment more before trailing back up my neck and capturing my lips. My back arches and I’ve completely lost control over the sounds tumbling out of my mouth, sounds that Cassian seems to thrive on.

He curses, and although it’s filthy it feels reverent, as he leans back and meets my gaze just as I cry out and my body trembles around him. My release finds me and I cling to him, wanting to revel in this moment. He thrusts a few more times before his movements grow uneven, and he comes with his eyes locked on mine and our breaths mingled together, quick and heavy.

Neither of us say a thing, but neither of us move, either. Our hands are clasped, his body is on top of mine. He stays inside of me.

I feel safe, wanted, loved.

A dress may not seem like something to get emotional over, but thinking about where we started, how far we’ve come, and what we’ve gone through in the past year makes me forever grateful that I wore that thirty dollar dress all those years ago. I can’t wait to marry my husband all over again.

#nessian #fanfic #fanfics #acotar #acomaf #acowar #acosf #acofas #modern au #angst au #nessian angst #fanfiction #sjm #collab #collabs #snelbz x theladyofdeath collab #nesta #cassian

103 notes · View notes

katebacks · 2 years

Text

What Goes Around Comes Around - JJK

→ pairing | Jeon Jungkook x Reader / Changkyun(IM) x Reader

→ genre | smut, angst, cheater!jungkook

→ word count | 7,231

→ summary |After you broke up with him months ago for finding out he was cheating on you, Jungkook sees you having sex with Changkyun in a dressing room.

→ warnings |sex, Adult content, A lot of cursing, Jungkook being a little shit, a lot of bitching, angst, some fluffy? Don't know. There is smut.

→ A/N| I had some parts of this fanfic already ready and as I was out of inspiration for another thing, I decided to put it all together and write this.. I wanted to dedicate this to both ARMYs and monbebes, because I know there aren't many fanfics with I.M around here. And I don't know why, since Changkyun is such a sweetheart. Give him a chance. Maybe I'll write a part two with Jungkook smut. I hope you like it, if you can reblog I would be very grateful. Send me asks with your thoughts, I'm always open to opinions.

You and Jungkook started dating three years ago, during the Love Yourself Answer album promotions, which is when you joined the BTS dancer team.In the beginning everything was flowers and fairy tales, even though dating was hidden from fans, even if they weren't forbidden to date, all the affection you received from the other guys and all the love you got from Jungkook seemed to be enough, but the The truth is, you just didn't seem like enough for him, at least not anymore.

You were nervous as fuck, you couldn't even remember the last time you performed in front of so many people.It was probably on BTS' last tour. And you didn't even want to imagine what a scandal it would be when when he found out you were going to perform with MonstaX. Jungkook never liked your friendship with Changkyun, always saying that he didn't want to be just your friend, that he wanted to fuck you, that the first chance he had to steal you from him, he would. And then he would start accusing you, saying that you liked the attention I.M gave you, that you liked to make him jealous and that you probably should have cheated on him over and over again. What had never happened, and would never happen, after all, you loved Jungkook and would never do anything to hurt him.

You never imagined that all those accusations were a shield to protect him from his own guilt. You had arrived a few hours earlier at HYBE to practice some of the new choreography that Hoseok had shown you. And as you passed in front of one of the rooms, you heard moans, moans you knew very well, peeking through the door lock, you could see very well the figure of Jungkook fucking another girl from behind, one of the staff. The next thing you remember is running away from there, locking yourself in Namjoon's studio, crying, sobbing, as he tries to calm you down and while Jungkook knocks on the door begging to come in.

After calming down a bit, and picking up your cell phone texting the first person that appeared on your screen, begging them to get you out of there, Namjoon convinced you to listen to what Jungkook had to say. He bent down in front of you who were sitting on top of the loveseat, while Namjoon was beside you, holding your hand. This happened for months, he cheated on you for months, saying that he was very anxious and stressed and that you were always busy practicing or studying, and that's why he ended up falling for the other woman's temptation. He didn't even have the courage to take the blame for his own mistake, he blamed you for not paying attention and blamed the other woman for provoking him. You were so enraged that as soon as he closed his mouth, your hand went to his cheek, making him fall on his ass on the floor, perplexed.

You left the studio and strode towards the elevator, seeing Jungkook running towards you as the doors closed. Already used to exiting through the back entrance, you ducked past the other staff and pushed open the emergency exit door, bursting into tears as you finally stepped out of the building.

"What happened?" The familiar voice made you look up and see Changkyun walking towards you, eyes wide and face worried. “I got your message. Why are you crying?”

"Jungkook." You hissed between sobs. "He cheated on me."

“What? That little fucker.” And he hugged you, letting you cry on his shoulder. Changkyun was a very sweet guy, he was quiet, he listened more than he spoke and always seemed to be willing to do anything to make you smile. On the same day you had met, two years ago, he had already called himself your best friend. And even though he was a sweet, calm, understanding guy, he was extremely scary when he got angry. Just like Jungkook. At the same moment, Jungkook had thrown himself against the door, calling your name, stopping to run when he saw you in another man's arms. Worse yet, in the arms of the man he knew had his own intentions with you.

"Yah! What the fuck are you doing here?" He yelled and pointed his finger towards you. Changkyun shot him a look before grabbing your shoulders and pushing you gently, releasing you from his embrace.

"My car is just around the corner, come on." He said ignoring the steric screams of the younger one, who was now held back by the hyungs who had finally managed to catch up to him, before he started a fight and ended up on the front pages of the gossip magazines.

You didn't see him again, except for the day you took your resignation letter to HYBE's HR. He wanted to talk to you, but the members themselves wouldn't let him, as they knew there was nothing he could say or do that would put an end to all the insecurity and sadness he had caused you.

Changkyun was the one who helped you out of the pit. He and the other boys welcomed you into the family and let you watch them train and practice. You spent more time with I.M and he let you hear his new compositions and kept your head busy. In time you had memorized all their choreographies and impressed with how quickly you had to learn them, they asked if you wanted to work with them, and because that was your profession and because you loved what you did, and for obviously being unemployed, you accepted. And that ended up bringing the two of you even closer.

And that brought you back to the present.

You were standing behind the stage, shaking, this would be your first performance together with another group, away from Jungkook and without Hoseok's tips. It would be a mix of songs, Jealousy, Shoot Out and God Damn, and the other seven guys didn't seem nervous at all. And you knew that BTS would be in the audience, after all this was an award show and they had been nominated for multiple awards. You thank god the whole team was wearing masks.

When the lights went out, everyone got into position as the curtains would go up in a few seconds and the performance would start. You were beside Changkyun and he was so close to you, you could feel his breath on you, and you could feel his heart beating, close to yours. You didn't know where the courage or the will to do it came from, but when you did, you had lifted your mask and pressed your lips to his. He stood still, the lack of light, everything being dark, you didn't know what his expression was, you didn't know if he liked it or hated it, so you quickly walked away, lowering the mask again, seconds later the lights came on and his eyes were glued to yours, and he had a bright smile on his face, which was a bad thing, as they couldn't smile during the performance.

Jungkook was in the audience with the other guys, he blinked a few times, with the feeling that he already knew one of those dancers on stage, which was strange.

"Stop frowning, the camera is about to fall on us." Yoongi warned him and the younger one obeyed, softening his expression. "What's it?"

"I don't know, I'm under the impression I know that dancer." The youngest said covering his mouth so no one could see what he was saying.

"There are a lot of them, be specific."

"The one with the stars on the... That's (y/n)." He almost yelled, widening his eyes and pointing at the stage, Yoongi hurriedly grabbed his wrist and lowered it, scolding him with his gaze.

"What's it?" Jin who was beside her asked.

"Jungkook is thinking one of the dancers is (y/n)." Yoongi said, waving at the camera as it landed on them.

"It's not possible, she didn't tell me anything about working for Starship." Namjoon whispered to his friends.

"I'm sure hyungs. I was with her when she got that tattoo." Jungkook bent down to get a bottle of water and as he did so, he whispered. "That son of a bitch besides stealing my girlfriend, now has her as a dancer."

"You betrayed her in the first place. He didn't steal her from you, you handed her over to him on a tray." It was Hoseok's turn to speak. "Now stop the scandal before some fancan catches you freaking out." And then the stage lights went out, the next song was about to start, Changkyun grabbed your hand and pulled you against him as the other members of the group and dancers left the stage, leaving just the two of you.

"You have no idea what you activated in me." He whispered in your ear and backed away a few inches, the lights coming on again. And as the audience cheered and applauded, he winked at you and then flashed a dirty grin, which made your whole body tingle. Jungkook shifted uncomfortably in his seat, clenching his jaw at the sight of you so close to another man. All the fears he had of seeing you leave him for another man were manifesting. And in his mind, you were still together, still dating, he just needed time with you to convince you of that, he only needed ten minutes, but you had run away from him for months. This was his chance, after the performance, he would talk to you, whatever the cost.

Seconds before he started, you both walked confidently towards the front of the stage, where sparks erupted as he started his chorus. The audience screamed in excitement, being surprised by the choreography, seeing you dance around the idol with sensual movements, but nothing explicit, which ended up holding everyone's attention as the two danced close together and seemed to connect with each movement, giving goosebumps everyone who watched that performance, whether present there or on television, not knowing that a song like that could have such an engaging choreography. The chemistry between the two of you just couldn't be seen by those who didn't want to.

The two of you turned around, facing each other and dancing together. You were smiling under the mask, having fun with what you were doing, even increasing the steps with a few more movements, like throwing your arms up and down through your body. As for him, he would smile at you, he was having fun because he was doing what he liked and because you were enjoying it too. He liked the idea of you being happy doing that with him.

As soon as Changkyun's part was over, he flashed a seductive smile to the audience as he put his arm around your shoulders and you put your arm around the boy's back and you both walked sensually across the stage. The lights went out once more and Jungkook swore, his voice not being heard as the crowd went wild. And when the lights came on again, the whole group was on stage accompanied by the other dancers, ready to perform Jealousy, and there was no other song that explained so well what Jungkook was feeling at that moment. He was so jealous, both of the closeness you had with the other guy, and of never having had the opportunity to dance to a sexy song with you on stage. You had so much charisma, so much stage presence, you were the perfect dancer, the perfect woman for him and you were in the arms of another man. Fuck!

They were then called by a Staff, it was time to prepare for their presentation, which would be the next one after the commercials. One by one they got up and went to the dressing room, not getting to see the end of MonstaX's performance.

After leaving the stage, the boys celebrated the success of the performance and as everyone went to the dressing room, Changkyun who was a little behind, held your hand. You looked at him and he was smiling as he walked, it was a cute, innocent smile, different from the one he had given you a few minutes ago.

“You two were amazing, did you see how the audience reacted to you? wah, even I got goosebumps from that dance." Minhyuk said, rubbing his arms, laughing.

"They could even say you two are dating or something." Kihyun said, looking over his shoulder at the boy who was walking calmly. "Are you?"

“I don’t know.” The boy next to you, squeezed your hand and pulled it, making you spin and hit his chest, who now had his arm over your shoulder, still holding your hand, but this time your faces were much closer. “Maybe.”

“Finally someone who is willing to take your virginity." Jooheon joked and received a middle finger from Changkyun as you laughed, embarrassed. "Is this how you treat your hyung?"

"Sorry hyung, but please go fuck yourself."

"At least he's polite, Jooheon, we teach him well." Shownu said, making the others laugh.

And when they reached the dressing room door, the others walked in while the two of you stayed outside for a little while longer.

"How it feels?"

"I feel like I can rule the world." You laughed at the cliché. "That was amazing, really. You know, at first I was super nervous, but then you looked at me and gave me so much confidence that I just got carried away and wow."

"Was it better than performing with Bangtan?" He asked, getting closer, holding your waist that was so euphoric that you didn't even notice the approach.

"It was different. You know, with BTS the choreographies were much heavier, and more difficult, Hoseok does what he can to make them as unique as possible, and that takes a lot of strength and a lot of energy. And even though I had fun, I don't think I had all that eye-to-eye emotion like I did with you, after all, I've never danced a solo like today, not even with, well, you know who.”

"What about the kiss you gave me? How did you feel?"

"I-I don't know." You bit your lip, seeing his eyes leave yours and move towards yoour mouth. "I just felt like I had to take the chance, I felt like I would never get another chance like that. I know I shouldn't have done that..."

"You're all wrong, babe." He sighed, bringing one of his hands up to your face, caressing your cheek before cupping your chin, his thumb going to your lip and stroking it. He licked his lips, slowly bringing his face to yours, making your heart race like a race car. "You should have done this a long time ago." You swallowed hard and closed your eyes as your breath hitched, the urge building more and more, his scent, his voice, his touch, god, you wanted him. And just as your lips were about to touch, a scream startled you both, making you pull away. As you looked to the side, Jungkook came towards them, along with Jimin and Taehyung. Changkyun took a deep breath, clenching his jaw, closing his eyes tightly before forcing every muscle in his body to pull away from you and turn towards the others as they approached.

"Get away from her"

"Why should I walk away from her?"

"You have no right to touch her."

"And why not?" he asked crossing his arms in front of his chest, annoyed. "She wants it, so do I. What's the problem?"

"You know very well what the problem is." Jungkook said taking a step towards the two of you, making you roll your eyes. In the last few weeks you had found yourself wondering what your reaction would be when you saw Jungkook again, you thought you would cry, you thought you would want to slap him, you even thought you wouldn't resist him and you would come crawling back to him, but you never thought you'd actually be rolling your eyes, irritated by the sound of his voice.

"Jimin, put some reason in his head" You asked the older one, who looked at Taehyung before looking at Jungkook.

"Maknae, that's enough." Jimin said holding back. "Let's go, or we'll be late for the performance. Leave them alone."

"Kate, you can't do this." He said, this time looking in your direction. You took a deep breath, thinking of the best way to answer him, but Changkyun was quicker and answered for you.

"She knows what she can and can't do. And she can kiss me if she wants to, and I know she wants to."

"She is my girlfriend." Jeon yelled threatening to step forward while the other boy burst into loud laughter. The noise caught the attention of the guys in the next dressing room, leaving the room and meeting confused faces as Changkyun bent his knees laughing.

"What's up?" Shownu asked confused, you shrugged and shook your head. "I.M?"

"They say the Golden Maknae can do anything, but I didn't know that comedy was one of your gifts, Jungkook." The boy said wiping the tears that had fallen from his eyes as he laughed, seeing Jungkook get even redder. "Get real kid, she's not your girlfriend anymore, she stopped being when you cheated on her with some skank.”

"It was a mistake, a mistake that only concerns her and me, you have nothing to do with it, so let us both work it out."

"Look at her. Does it look like she wants to 'work out' something with you?" Changkyun's angry voice reappeared. Jungkook looked at you who were huddled between Changkyun and the guys at the dressing room door.

"Jeon Jungkook I swear if you're looking for a fight again, I'll tell Bang-PD." Namjoon's voice rang out from behind the three Bangtan Boys who turned around, making room for the leader to pass. "Go back to the dressing room now, or else." Jimin and Taehyung waved at you before turning around and walking back down the hall, Jungkook looked at you for a few more seconds before doing the same. As for Namjoon, he whispered an apology to you before bowing to greet the other guys and following the path of his members.

"You know that if you got into a fight with Jungkook, he would have ripped you in two, don't you?" Minhyuk asked, making the boy frown. "What? Have you seen the size of his arms? He looks like two tree trunks."

"Who needs enemies when you have Minhyuk as a friend, right?" Hyungwon joked, making the mood lighter.

"Let's go back outside to our seats, the next performances are about to start." Shownu said.

"You can go ahead, I'll change first." Changkyun said, slinging his arm over your shoulder, you felt yourself burning with embarrassment seeing the boys' eyes all over you.

"Are you going to change or are you going to change (y/n)'s clothes too?

"Stop being so annoying, Jooheon." Kihyun said holding the boy's neck and pulling him away."

"Come on honey, let's talk." He said pulling you into the room and closing the door.

...

After going on stage, Jungkook couldn't concentrate, the only thing he could see was Changkyun's vacant seat and think about where he could be. Was he with you? Had the two of you gone, were you doing something? Jungkook has never wished for a performance to end as quickly as this one. He couldn't lose you, he couldn't. He needed to have one more chance, just one more chance to make everything right. He would do everything right, he knew it. After all as Changkyun himself said, he was the Golden Maknae, he could do anything.

"Jungkook, where the hell are you going?" Namjoon called out to him, seeing that the boy was following a different path than the one leading to the group's dressing room. "You'll end up getting punched in the eye and I won't do anything to defend you, you're being a pain in the ass today."

"I won't do anything wrong, Hyung, I promise." Namjoon shook his head in disbelief.

"She wants nothing more to do with you, kid. Accept it and move on before you get hurt." Yoongi said. "Go, but you know, if you get in trouble, the whole group's reputation is on the line."

“I know, hyung. Thank you.”

And so he continued on his way.

Back in the dressing room, you and Changkyun were inside the cramped bathroom, you were sitting on the sink, and he was between your legs, hands on your thighs, while yours were in his hair. You didn't know how long you were there, but your lips were starting to hurt and swell from kissing him so much. Your makeup must have been all smeared with sweat, not even dancing had you sweated like that.

“Fuck, i want you so fucking much.” He whispered, using one hand to cup your face, looking into your eyes as your ragged breaths tried to synchronize. You wrapped your legs around his waist and pulled as close as possible, moaning as you felt his cock brush against the fabric covering your private parts. "You will drive me crazy."

"Have me. Take me, please." You begged, didn't giving a damn about where you were, you knew someone could walk in at any moment, but you were wrapped up in so much ecstasy, you couldn't control yourself anymore.

"Shit, wait a minute." He said, giving you a quick kiss before rushing out of the bathroom, leaving you with an emptiness between your legs, and your entire body tingling every second. You leaned your head against the mirror behind you and closed your eyes, biting your lips, one of your hands stopping at your breast and massaging it while the other stopped between your legs, massaging your pleasure point.

"Fuck, what a sight." His voice made you open your eyes and see him with dark eyes. Desire, lust, passion, you could see it all in those eyes. And it was all for you. "Take your pants off, sweetheart." He said, closing the door behind him. You did as he said, stood up and took off the pants you were wearing, leaving only your panties that could easily be pushed aside. He hurried to lower his own pants, lifting his shirt and putting the hem in his mouth, holding it while he put the condom on his cock. And what a dick. Your mouth watered at the sight of him, just wanting to be able to feel him, even if it was over the condom. You knelt in front of him, replacing his hands with yours, massaging his member before putting it in your mouth, swallowing as much as you could, moving as fast as you could, watching him throw his head back and roll his eyes. He gasped, his chest rising and falling, his muscles tensing. “Hell no, babe.” He grabbed a piece of your shirt and pulled it up at once, grabbing you around the waist, and sitting you down on the sink again. "I'm going to come inside you tonight, another day you can do whatever you want with me, but not today, got me?"

“Yeah.”

“Good.” He whispered and then kissed you, holding your face on both sides, a kiss so deep you could barely breathe. He then released one of his hands from your face, and went down to between your legs where he pushed your panties to the side, touching the waterfall that was at your entrance. he cursed. "I want to taste you, but if I wait a little longer, I'll come without even having fucked you."

"Please don’t." You whispered against his lips. Desperate for more.

"I promise to make it up to you when we get out of here, hm?"

"Hmm." You barely managed to respond, feeling him enter you, arching your back, feeling him stretch you. “yes” You dragged the word out, before you hugged him by the shoulders and he hugged you around the waist, starting to move against you, until he was finally all inside, pounding to the end, hard and slowly, rolling his hips against yours, your body unable to keep still, trying your best to get more friction, more movement. “Fuck.”

“Yes babe, fuck. Soo good for me.”

“"The door!" You whispered, seeing that it hadn't closed properly, and the wind seemed to be opening it.

"Don't worry, no one will come in here until I leave, the guys are good at giving us privacy." he whispered.

"Let me hold it." You asked not too sure. He smiled and nodded giving you a kiss on the forehead, helping you down, you faced the door, with your hands flat on it as he held your waist and positioned himself at your entrance, entering again, slowly, making you throw your head back and press your fingers against the door, wanting to dig your nails into the wood with pleasure. “Faster, please.” And he did what you wanted, increasing the force of the thrusts and the speed too, getting to the point where you couldn't hold back your moans anymore, letting them invade the entire bathroom and probably the dressing room on the other side of the door as well. The air was so hot, you were so sweaty that sweat was running down your body, wetting your shirt, as was Changkyun, but neither of you wanted to stop.

He then grabbed the back of your neck and pulled you back, making your back lean against his chest, one hand holding your neck while the other was around your waist, his lips were against your ear, talking dirty things that he would still do with you and everything was so intense, you both closed your eyes, the moans coming out of your mouths more and more sly, louder. And when you felt like you were about to come, you held his hands, your insides tightening, your entire body tensed as he fucked you hard, with desire.

"Oh fuck, babe." He groaned and tightened his arms around you.

""Shit, I'm cumming, fuck."

"Fuck, (y/n). Oh."

And you felt like you were in free fall, your legs got weak and thanks to Changkyun you didn't collapse.

The two of you held still for a few seconds, enjoying the sensation, your hearts beating, racing, your breathing heavy, your head spinning and his scent soothing you. You had never imagined doing something like this, or even feeling something like this being with him. It was strange to feel that way. You had always felt that Changkyun was different in some way, you knew that ever since you met him, he seemed to be special, but you didn't know he was that much. If you were in love with him, you'd be fucked. You spaced out for a second, feeling his light kisses on your neck , and only when you felt a cool breeze in your body. that something popped into your mind. The door. When you opened your eyes, the bathroom door was open, and worst of all, Jungkook was right in the middle of the dressing room, eyes glued to you. Anger, hate, despair, that's what you saw in his eyes, and it was all because of you.

"Shit" Changkyun hurried to close the door, slamming it hard and using his foot to hold it. For the first few seconds you felt nothing, and when reality hit, you were filled with humiliation.You felt ashamed, dirty, and all the pleasure you had just felt turned to disgust. "Honey, are you okay?" He turned you to face him. You shook your head, just wanted to cry. In fact, you were already crying. "Oh no, babe, don't cry." He pulled you into a hug. "Dress up okay? You have nothing to be ashamed of."

"But he just saw us..."

"We closed our eyes for a few seconds, we don't know how much he saw, it's okay." He then quickly took off the condom, rolled it up and threw it away. Then he put his pants on and helped you into yours.

"Just hold my hand and stand behind me, okay?"

"Hm"

When he opened the door, you kept your head down, your face still burning. Standing behind him, with your face close to his back, hiding as much as possible.

"(Y/n)" Jungkook voice as he said your name was broken, and you could only feel even more guilty about what had happened. You didn't want anyone to see you at a time like that, least of all your ex boyfriend.

"Get out of my way, Jungkook"

"I swear to god I'm going to rip your face off if you don't let go of her, Changkyun, I'm at my wit's end with you. I should blow you all over for what I just witnessed." And now his voice was menacing. Minhyuk hadn't lied when he said that Jungkook would be able to split Changkyun in two, he had been boxing for a long time and could win any fight, especially with people who didn't know how to fight. "Let go of her. (y/n), let's go."

"Back off."

You knew that if you didn't interfere, they would end up fighting and getting hurt, so you just let go of I.M's hand and walked out from behind him. He frowned at you. You were shaking, you didn't want to look into Jungkook's eyes again, but you had to, and this time, you could only see sadness in his eyes, even though his expression was one of pure hate.

“I'll go with you.”

“(y/n)...” I.M whispered your name confused and... hurt perhaps? and you looked at him, holding back tears, the corners of your lips turning down as you forced yourself not to cry. You tried to smile, tried to show that everything was fine even though you couldn't lie in that situation. And so you turned to Jungkook, the smile fading. “I'm right behind you.” And you pointed towards the door. He gave I.M one last look before heading towards the exit and you did. As soon as he walked out into the hallway, Jungkook turned around to say something but you interrupted him. “Let's not have this conversation here, Jungkook, come on.”

And so you made your way to the boys' dressing room, heads down so no one could see your red eyes. And when you entered BTS' dressing room, only the guys were there, no staff, just them. Which would make possible the scandal that was to come.

“What was on your mind to do something like that?” Jungkook asked as he closed the door behind them with all his strenght, drawing the boys' attention. "Have you gone completely crazy? What happened to you? You would never do such a thing.” And as you looked around at everyone else present, you took a deep breath, trying to keep control of your calm. You were no longer ashamed, you were simply furious.

“What do you want from me, Jungkook? What do you want me to say?”

“I want you to tell me why I walked into that room and found you two having sex in the dressing room bathroom.” He raised his voice, and behind the two of you, the boys looked at each other wide-eyed. They had seen the two of you fight before, they were used to it, but apparently they had never witnessed anything like this. Not even the day you saw him cheating on you. “You kept telling me that there was nothing between the two of you, that you were just friends, but less than two months after we broke up, you are fucking him? And worst of all, in a place where anyone could go in and see. Have you no shame? Aren't you ashamed that you told me you didn't feel anything for him, but now you're having sex with him? Did you do it while we were dating too?”

“Oh, fuck you, Jungkook. You're not going to come here and accuse me of cheating.” You cursed. “You have no right to question me about my life. I don't have to explain anything to you.”

"You're fucking mine." he yelled.

"I'm not yours." And you did too. “You cheated on me, you were the reason our relationship ended, I.M was the one who was there for me when I spent nights crying, sobbing thinking I wasn't good enough, that I wasn't pretty enough, because the man I loved cheated on me with a fucking staff. I saw the two of you, Jungkook. I found you fucking her.”

"And now you decided to do the same? Did you decide that you were going to have sex with him here, knowing that I wanted to talk to you, knowing that I would come after you, knowing that there was a possibility that I could walk into that room and get you two?”

"Stop fucking accusing me. I didn't do anything thinking about you, on the contrary, everything I did was thinking about him." You spat out your words, already out of patience to try to maintain civility.

“Hey guys.” Namjoon tried to intervene, leaving where he was and stopping beside the two. “You two are hot-headed, you need to calm down first before it gets out of hand. Have this conversation another day, hm? Or you will end up regretting the things that will be said now.”

"No, I don't want to talk to her another day, she needs to explain to me right now why she was having sex with another guy..."

"Oh my god, are you listening to any words I'm saying?" You asked, this time in a lower voice, but still not believing what you were hearing. “Get real, Jungkook. You cheated on me, we broke up, period. What I do with other people, what Changkyun and I were doing in that bathroom is none of your business. I didn't want you to see it, I didn't want anyone else to see it.”

“So glad I was the one who walked into that room and not one of the MonstaX guys, because otherwise they would have gotten you in a position where they could see your pussy, which would be embarrassing, unless of course they're screwing you too.”

"I'm so fucking sick of it." You sighed, placing your hands on your hips and looking to the corner of the room before turning to the boy. That was supposed to be a perfect day, everything was going well until he started acting like you were still together, as if you committed a crime for having sex with Changkyun. “You should choose your words better Jungkook, if there's any bitch in this room, that bitch is you, who couldn't keep your dick in your pants during our relationship. We've been together for over five years, and at no time have I done anything to hurt you. But you always did the opposite, always accusing me of something I never did, always being cold to me when you were angry about something, always preferring to hang out with your friends than spend time with me. And to be honest, I got it. I understand why you never wanted to go public about our relationship, I understand why you were always stressed, I know what your life is like and your obligations, but nothing gave you the right to do what you did to me or accuse me of this nonsense. And I don't give you the right to keep acting like my boyfriend, acting like nothing happened, like I'm the wrong one. It’s done, accept it.”

Soon the room was silent, you could only hear the noise of the groups performing on stage and the fans singing along. The other guys continued without saying a word or acting on what was happening. You ran your hand over your face, tiredness was wearing you down, after all, it wasn't every day you danced, fucked and fought.

“Look, I shouldn't even be here, I only came because I didn't want you to freak out in front of him, I didn't want you to do something stupid that could hurt him and put Bangtan's reputation on the line. I'm going now. I hope you get on with your life, because I'm gonna get on with mine.”

And walking past him, you opened the door leaving the room without even saying goodbye to your friends. You just wanted to take a taxi and go home, but before you could walk back to MonstaX's dressing room, Jungkook's hand reached for your forearm and pulled you back hard, making you spin around and slam into his chest, eyes wide both from his action and from the fact that any minute that hallway would be full of idols, staffs and probably cameras too.

“We are not over. I made a mistake. And I'm sorry, I was weak, I was stupid, it shouldn't have happened, but I'm here, apologizing and begging you to rethink your decision."

“Let go of me”

“(y/n)”

“I said let go, Jungkook.” And so he did, he let go of your arm, but he didn't pull away from you. "Don't follow me, don't call me, don't try to talk to me anymore, leave me alone. You don't deserve a second chance and even if I gave you one, you'd ruin it. You don't know how to have things, you only know how to conquer them, and after you get them, you keep them in a cardboard box in your basement."

"This is not true." And his voice was broken again, red eyes full of tears, so full that it started to slide down his face.

"It is. You never showed that you loved me, Jungkook, you just showed me that I was yours, and nothing else. You only used me when you needed to and when I wasn't available, instead of waiting for me, you went after another woman, perhaps several other women.”

"I love you" He started to sob. Chin tense, nose red, sniffling, chest rising and falling rapidly. You hated to see him like this, but you hated him even more."Please, please don't leave me. I've changed. I'll never do anything like that again, please, I beg you." And he took one step towards you, but you took two steps away from him. He covered his face with his hands, bursting into tears, no longer controlling how much he cried, nor the volume of his voice. Jimin was the first out of the dressing room, followed by the other guys who looked alternately between you and him. “P-please babe...”

“Goodbye, Jeon.”

And when you turned your back, you could hear him call your name, and as much as you wanted to go back and hug him, say that everything would be okay, you knew it wouldn't be like that.

1 YEAR LATER

“Hyung, where is the..." Jungkook's words died when he entered Namjoon's studio and saw that he was watching a live on the computer. Changkyun was the one on the screen.

A few weeks earlier, many pictures of you and Changkyun on a Caribbean cruise ended up being posted on the internet. Everyone freaked out. In the pictures you kissed, hugged, played and had fun. There was no way to deny that. The whole world already knew he had a girlfriend and his face was all over the news in every possible newspaper. When you sat in the manager's office to talk about it, the first thing he said was that you should break up, but Changkyun refused. And as he had already talked to the other members of the group, he had already decided that he would not extend his contract with Starship, which is why he no longer felt obliged to follow the company's rules, although they were never forbid from dating.

So it was time to go public.

Namjoon was one of the first to know and so the other guys in BTS were also informed, and everyone was happy that you were happy. Except Jungkook.

"His fans will never let him assume a relationship like that, they will hate her, they can't go public at all. She will suffer." And even though he was really worried about you, he was also jealous, jealous that the other guy would do to you what he wanted to do.

"Like I said, I have a girlfriend. And I'm really happy to know that so many people, so many fans are supporting us right now." And while he smiled, Jungkook just got angrier. "She is very important to me and makes me very happy. She is always by my side and is a monbebe just like you guys. I'm sure that when you meet her, you will love her, just like me."

Jungkook couldn't forget you and he had tried so hard but nothing could replace what you were to him. And even though he couldn't accept the end of your relationship, even after a year had passed, he was happy that you had gotten your bachelor's degree in dance and now you were planning to open your own dance school, aimed at the poorest kids who could not afford dance lessons.

"I hope you respect her and take care of her as you do to me. She deserves all the love in the world." Changkyun continued to speak. Jungkook left the studio, he didn't want to hear that man's voice anymore, the one who stole his happiness, who stole the woman of his life. Who was he trying to fool? He screwed up, it could have been him making that announcement, it could have been him now telling the world how happy he was with you by his side. But all he had left was an empty space in the bed and a broken heart with no chance of mending or healing. He just wanted you back, but right now, he didn't stand a chance.

249 notes · View notes