Tumgir
#anonymous
mewi-or-lara · a day ago
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Shoosh, he's sleepin...
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p1neapplerum · 17 hours ago
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requesting a ren diggity dog? :-)
doge
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useless-englandfacts · a day ago
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What's Jamie Oliver done recently that's making everyone roast him on Twitter??
the field is very crowded atm but i honestly think jamie oliver is one of the most annoying people the uk has produced in the last 50 years
you know how his whole Thing is ~healthy~ food?
recently he organised a protest outside the prime minister's house to get the government to ban bogof deals on 'unhealthy' food because he cares more about children being fat than he does about poor people being able to afford to eat.
here's the prick at his protest (wasting a perfectly good eton mess too):
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if he actually cared about poor people at the very least he would talk about making healthy food more accessible to low income families, but he never does because he sees junk food as an evil that exists in a vacuum. we know this isn't the case and that it's a lot more complicated than just "poor people eat junk food because they are lazy and then it makes them fat". what jamie oliver does is just class-shaming disguised as caring about 'health'.
the man is worth around 300 million and he has the audacity to go around making life harder for low income families who are already suffering during a cost of living crisis. he truly is the worst of the worst!!!
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holyshit · 2 days ago
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claiming his man as always
https://twitter.com/delouhaz/status/1528170695267692544?t=JhUamCPf4TQ0Aiu10rKzqQ&s=19
celebrities, they're just like us! we're all excited about harry's house!
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duganator01 · a day ago
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Actor Au: During the "Take off the mask scene" Vex takes off the mask and Percy is wearing a clown nose underneath
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I love it. I love everything about it
Look, SOMEONE has to cut the tension
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incorrectbatfam · 2 days ago
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What are the batfams names short for? wrong answers only
Dick: Dickothy
Jason: J-J-J-J-JASOOOON!!!
Tim: Optimus Prime
Damian: Damianian
Duke: Archduke
Cullen: Edward Cullen
Steph: Dr. Stephen Strange
Cass: Casserole
Babs: Kebabs
Harper: Harper's Ferry
Carrie: Card-Carrying Member
Kate: Skateboard
Alfred: Fettuccine Alfredo
Selina: Gotta Keep An Eye Out For Selener
Bruce: Bruschetta
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quietbirdee · 15 hours ago
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that eye......sans undertale.....
he's just a little guy
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vinnybox · a day ago
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SENTIENT BAT SHADOW. SENTIENT BAT SHADOOOOOOOOOOW
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SENTIENT BAT SHADOW!!!!
Bruce remembering he needs to hand Dick some of Alfred’s cookies but is a little occupied. His shadow got his back tho :] Dick and Alfred can head on over without a worry.
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iredreamer · 2 days ago
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Can I request you do an analysis of the last scene in season 2 episode 6? Where Anne is panicking because she thinks Ann is going to leave her for a man - as has happened in the past - And Ann reassures her that she’s not going anywhere with a gentle caress.
such a sincere moment and the scene makes me want to celebrate how far we have come as a society now that lesbians can have kids together (not that it’s very accessible for everyone), and legally get married (in most countries, we def have a long way to go still). On top of being such a beautiful moment between Anne and Ann!, they deserve endless amounts of kudos for the part they played in blazing a trail for lesbians today. I really loved this episode.
Anyway, I’d love to hear your breakdown/thoughts on the scene if you have a moment! Def the best GJ blog out there!
Okay, let's do it, let’s break it down!!!
First off I wanna start saying that that scene is long 6 minutes and 15 seconds and I want us all to appreciate this because, really, scenes this long are a real treat. They are so well thought out and they always end up being my favourite. For reference, the hilltop scene is 5 minutes and 45 seconds and the scene where the Ann(e)s argue at the end of 1x04 – one of my absolute loves – is 7 minutes and 38 seconds long. But, enough with data!
A couple of random things before going into it in more details:
I love LOVE the domesticity we see in this scene with Anne pouring tea to Ann, offering her some biscuits and the way in which Ann declines the offer just with a wave of the hand.
We can also subtly pick up how different Anne and Ann are in the way they administer the household, with Ann calling Hemingway by her first name – Thank you, Rachel – opposed to Anne who calls all the servants by their last name – Thank you, Hemingway – I love how this kind of details are woven through the dialogue and how, with just a couple of words or gestures, we’re able to pick up different dynamics between the characters. And of course small things like this, when they’re done right (like in this case), bring the characterization to a whole new level.
This is gonna be long so get yourself a cup of tea or coffee and let’s go!
As soon as AL sits down it’s clear that there is some tension between the Ann(e)s. Ann’s all fake smiles and from the way she looks at Anne, from the way she swallows before talking we can see that she’s thinking about a way to bring up what is going round and round in her head. Anne picks it up too – something is not right.
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After a while AW says that she’s been thinking about the division of the estate, the problems with her sister and that she’s not sure what it is all for if in the end everything will go to the Sutherlands anyway...
– And without children, I’m not sure what it is all for. – This is where Anne starts being terrified. As soon as AW says this, AL is thinking what she will only say during the second half of the scene: We do things for us! – But here she keeps her thoughts and fears for herself. She wants to understand what Ann Walker really means. We’ve already seen in season one that it takes time for Ann Walker to really explain herself, Anne knows this and so, little by little she tries to understand more and more. Is Ann saying she wants children? AW not being sure what it is all for could mean that she doesn’t think that doing things just for the two of them is enough?
Anne is nervous, she puts down her cup of tea, she adjusts herself on the chair, she smooths her waistcoat... she pretends she’s calm.
– And is it not God’s purpose that we...people have children? – Is it tho?
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We’ve heard Anne say before how being how she is is all natural, is God given, so can it really be God’s purpose for them, for her, to have children? When having children means being with a man? – It would be absurd, it would be perverse – No. Anne doesn’t think that that’s everyone's purpose. But what does Ann think?
– I suppose I’d always imagined that, one day, I would have children of my own, that’s all. – It breaks my heart how AW says this line. You can hear her voice almost breaking. She’s scared, just as much as AL is. She’s scared about saying this out loud, she knows Anne could take it wrong. And AL tries to understand and tries to bring everything to a rational, logical level. She doesn’t lose her temper here, even tho we can already see how scared she is to have this conversation. How could Ann want children when she feels a sort of repugnance to forming any sort of connection with a man? It doesn’t make sense, does it?
And here comes the conflict.
The way they think about things is very very different. Ann Walker imagines things without really thinking about the real, practical aspect of it all while Anne Lister’s goal is to make things happen. I love how this scene shows us how different the Ann(e)s are in the way they think about their future. On one hand we have Anne who is very pragmatic. She’s realistic and logical, she is able rationalise what things mean – You mean, you’d imagined children, but not marriage to a man? – For her this doesn’t make any sense. She doesn’t entertain impossible thoughts. Even in the way she says to Ann later on in the scene that being with her is a great sacrifice, she says – practically – what being with her means, it means they will never have children, it means they will never have a marriage certificate, it means they have to face public scrutiny, it means they have to make sacrifices. So they have to be certain of what they are doing, they have to evaluate everything.
On the other hand we have Ann Walker who’s the opposite. When she says that she wants to be with Anne more than anything in the whole world that is a very romantic thought but not a pragmatic one. She wants to be with her, but what does it really mean to be with Anne Lister? She’s driven by her love for Anne and that is really the only thing that matters to her. She says that but at the same time she talks about children without fully realising that the two things are not reconcilable. She can’t want both of those things, it’s impossible – and what if, one day, her desire of having children ends up being greater than her desire of being with Anne? This is what Anne Lister is thinking, and this is one of the things that terrifies her.
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And here, here you can really see the terror in Anne’s eyes become greater and greater. She struggles to keep it together. The way she closes her eyes when she says – It does signify – is heartbreaking and it reminds me of the – What? – she shouts at the end of episode 4 in season 1. She immediately thinks about her conversation with Marian and, like with Marian, she can’t come up with a counter argument to what Ann Walker just told her. If she wants to be a mother, well then, what can Anne do? What can Anne say?
But Ann Walker wants her to fight for them, for her. She doesn’t like that Anne says that she won’t be an obstacle for something she has very much at heart. – Don’t say that – This season Ann has been feeling invisible, ignored, she’s seen her wife do 100 different things and she feels put aside at times. She also knows something happened with Mariana and she’s finding out all these new things about Anne – so, I believe, she wants to see Anne care for her, she doesn’t want to see her give up so easily.
But Anne doesn’t even hear that – she can’t keep it in anymore, she’s upset and she’s about to explode. I love the quote of the meteor and I love how she stands up from that table.
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I love how she can’t keep still – she was so composed before but now her anger, sadness, fear are too great and they take over completely. She is so terrified that she’s actually shaking.
– Things like this, all my life. I pretend it gets easier, but it doesn’t. – What a confession this is. Anne who always rises above it all, who’s strong, who can’t be touched by the things people say about her, is admitting here that it all gets to her. With time she’s just become good enough at pretending it doesn’t affect her but in reality it does. And it’s beautiful how she lets Ann Walker see this very vulnerable aspect of herself. Now she is not alone anymore, now she has someone to share her fears and insecurities with. Now she has Ann.
The way AW says “Anne” right after breaks me – she is so calm, her voice is so steady – in her mind she hasn’t thought one second about breaking it off with Anne and you can hear it in the way she says her name.
And finally, Anne says what she’s been thinking from the start – We do things for us! That’s who it’s for. So that we can have a life together. We matter.
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And, again, look how different her body language is here opposed to the beginning of the scene where she was trying to keep calm and they were sitting at the table. Her body shakes, she moves her hands around, she has a heavy weight on her chest and you can feel it by the way she breathes. She’s so fucking terrified.
Oh and here comes the line that personally speaks to me the most – Having children isn’t the only reason to strive and do well and better oneself and be happy – This right here. It’s amazing that today we have so many opportunities and something like this (having a child if you’re in a same sex relationship) isn’t impossible anymore but personally I feel that more than that the message I’m taking away from this scene is this: my relationship doesn’t need a child to have meaning or be considered “complete”.
Anne doesn’t want children, doesn’t care about children, doesn’t think about how having children would be, her life is full even without having children. She loves her life the way it is. She understands the desire someone else might have of being a mother, yes, but that’s not something she personally dreams for herself. And I just love this on a very personal level.
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Even the way in which she speaks about it to Ann Walker –  [A child] It’s something that I can never give you – the focus is not on her, it’s on Ann. She’s upset and sad not because she can’t be a mother, she’s upset because in that moment she’s realising that Ann might want something she won’t be able to give her. And here’s another thing that terrifies her: not being enough for Ann.
Another thing that I love about this whole scene and about Suranne’s performance is the pauses she makes to breathe and the way in which you can really see Anne struggling to not break down even more and cry. It really makes you feel how scared and terrified Anne is during the whole exchange. I particularly love the pause she does before saying – I need to know about that now – I love how that line is delivered because you can really feel how scared Anne is to know the answer to that request. What if Ann Walker says to her that, yes, she might want children in the future? What happens then? Where do they go from there?
What the Ann(e)s have, what they really have, is the promise they made each other, in private, in secret, something only the two of them know about. That’s all they’ve got. They don’t have a marriage certificate – We can never have a piece of paper that says we have any kind of legal union – they don’t have a child to bind them. They literally only have each other and the promise they made. There is nothing “from the outside” that binds them together, no security, nothing. Imagine the trust they have to have in each other to be sure that, one day, the other one won’t just walk away.
– You’re frightening me. – I’m frightening you? – This literally broke me. Here, right here is when Anne admits to be frightened, terrified.
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Ann Walker says “You’re frightening me.” and with that reversed question Anne is basically saying “Oh, you are frightened, well you have no idea how much you are frightening me. You have no idea how terrified I am that all this you’re saying could mean that you’ll leave me one day.”
– You have to be certain. That this, here, with me, is what you want. – Here is another bit that I absolutely adore for the same reason of the “I need to know about that now”. The way in which Anne says this, the pauses she makes, good lord, she is scared of finishing the sentence, she’s scared to hear what Ann Walker will say after.
And this all parallels to the hilltop scene, AL asking AW if she’s ready to take the sacrament with her, etc. etc. – and like then, Ann Walker is ready to reassure Anne Lister that this is absolutely what she wants, no doubts about it.
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– I want to be with you more than anything in the whole world. You know that! – There is no hesitation in her answer. None. What I find interesting tho are the words AW chooses. She just wants to be with Anne Lister, whatever that entails. She doesn’t answer something like “Yes I understand and this is what I want”, she literally says that the only thing she wants is being with Anne, fuck the rest. AW doesn’t stop to think of what that could mean, of what sacrifices she'll have to make, she doesn’t stop to think about all the possibilities, she just knows that she loves AL and that she wants to be with her. That’s all.
And here we see the way in which Ann Walker shows affection and love. The caring touches I’ve already talked about, that were so clear in episode 1. Ann comes closer. She wants to both reassure Anne and smooth things over by getting close to her wife and comforting her physically and not only with words.
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But Anne is too scared and she’s still pretending to be stoic. She’s also protecting herself from disappointment. We’ve already seen her have this attitude, on the hilltop scene when Ann walks closer to her and she instinctively takes a couple of steps back.
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I love how here we see the same thing happening but it’s clear that their dynamic has changed. Ann’s bolder and goes straight for Anne’s hand – and Anne is not so gentle, she’s not scared to hurt Ann with her rejection. They are comfortable with each other and it’s clear they know each other in a more profound way.
Ann knows Anne too well, she knows what she needs and so she gives her space, at first...and when she comes closer again it is to show Anne that she is ready to make all the sacrifices in the world for her.
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I love how Ann takes a moment to think about what to do, to think about what is the best way to reassure her wife. It’s almost as if Ann has learned from Anne what to do in these kind of moments. AW comforts AL in the same way in which AL comforts her – getting closer, kissing her hand, caressing her cheek, being physically close, words are not enough sometimes, and AW is not really good with words anyway.
There’s a little bit of a power struggle at the beginning – AW wants to mend AL’s wounds but AL doesn’t want to let her at first. But AW knows what Anne really needs and doesn’t let go, it’s as if she’s saying to Anne: “Don’t worry, you can be vulnerable with me, I won’t hurt you, trust me”. She takes Anne’s hand and I LOVE how we can see surprise on Anne’s face here.
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And those hand kisses y’all!!!! Good God hELP – I’m perfectly articulated and focused discussing anything else but my GOD the hand kisses literally make me break down and cry and lose all ability to properly express my thoughts.
And this is all I’m gonna say about the hand kiss here...
...the last time Ann kissed Anne’s hand was when they were exchanging rings and here HERE, DOING THIS, ANN is bASICALLY renewing the promise she made – and the hand she kisses is the hand with the wedding ring!!!!! SHE’S KISSING THE RING!!!!!
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Can we let this sink in??? Like, without saying anything Ann is saying so fucking much! She’s saying “I married you, I am your wife, and I want to spend the rest of my life with you, whatever happens.” Can you hear me cry? Ann Walker owns my life!!
And then Ann puts Anne’s hand on her cheek, to feel her close, and she closes her eyes while kissing her palm and yall I CANT. And the way it all parallels to the chaumiere scene and to the hilltop scene like – I’m speechless!!
And when, finally, Ann Walker caresses Anne’s cheek, Anne can’t pretend anymore (and again beautiful parallel with the hilltop scene).
I mean, what we learned from all this is that when Anne’s not strong enough, Ann Walker will be strong enough for the both of them – You are stronger than you think. –
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this show is a masterpiece
bye
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p1neapplerum · 17 hours ago
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I need more of your gorgeous Quackity please please 🙏💕
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clanwarrior-tumbly · 2 days ago
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Im saw you request of reader save the mini Huggies can do the save for bunzo bunny please he is too cute to die I’m was devastated then see him dead headcanons
Breaking a game wasn’t something you had in mind.
But you were getting overwhelmed fast and got dizzy trying to hit the cease button to stop everything.
Although disappointed that it “broke”, Mommy congratulated you nonetheless and gave you part of the code..which annoyed you heavily.
Still, you took whatever you could get and left.
Though not before you heard the sounds of crashing and Bunzo screaming.
You went back (against your better judgement) to investigate and saw the poor bunny on the platform where you once stood, the cable ripped out of his back and leaving a bloody wound as Mommy towered over him.
She tore out one of his button eyes but before she could do more damage, you intervened and shoved her away with the Grabpack, taking Bunzo into your arms and fleeing, abandoning the cymbals.
Once you both are in a somewhat safer place, he’s just shaking in your arms and crying. “I-I didn’t muh-mean to scare you....sh-she made me!!” He blubbers. “She w-was gonna...gonna..!!”
You just hugged him (not caring that you were covered in his blood), petting his ears while being mindful of his back, reassuring him you’ll protect him.
At some point you do find abandoned sewing kits made for toys his size, and you stitch up his injury so he doesn’t lose any more blood.
You see his sharp teeth retracting, showing that he trusts you now.
You don’t know for sure if you can fully protect him from Mommy--but you at least saved his life in that moment.
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here2bbtstrash · 2 days ago
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HI! I wanted to say I love your idol joonie one shot I enjoyed reading it it was amazing. If only the OC can be invited on tour and ride him backstage before he starts the show.
five minutes (explicit)
genre: smutty lil drabble!! and me popping my request cherry >:)
pairing: namjoon x reader
summary: your fuckbuddy has a graduation gift for you, but he might have overestimated your self-control.
this is a companion fic to my oneshot park and ride! read that one first if you want to get all the references, or don't, i'm not your mom
word count: 2.6k
contains: explicit sexual content~*~ idol verse, fuckbuddies, semi-public sex (aka a quickie in the green room), fingering, unprotected sex, dick-riding, dirty talk, squirting, a 3 second blowjob, joon's dick is still Very Big, ft. tiny cameos from JK and yoongi
A/N: remember when i said i would write this later, i LIED, i'm a LIAR, i wrote it NOW because i really liked the idea (and i was super bored while traveling). ask and you shall receive anon, i hope this is what you were looking for!!!! 💜
~*~
You’re enjoying a quiet Friday night in, basking in the glow of not having to stress about homework for the first time in two years, when a familiar number pops up on your phone.
“So, how does it feel to be done with grad school?” You’re surprised to hear him ask. Maybe the bar is in hell, but his own schedule is busy enough, you didn’t think he’d have the brain space to remember yours, too. “I know you worked hard for it. I’m proud of you.”
“Yep, I finally got my stupid piece of paper.” You say dryly. “Maybe now I can actually get paid enough to get a new car.”
You swear you can hear him smile on the other end of the phone. “Pretty soon you won’t even need me anymore.”
“I thought we discussed last time that I keep you around for one specific reason.” You can’t help yourself. “A very big reason.”
Namjoon laughs softly. “Well, maybe this will help my case. I got you a graduation present.”
Now he’s surprised you twice in under a minute. “I– what?”
“Did you know we have a stop on this tour that’s right by you?”
You do know. The tickets had sold out in approximately four seconds, if your Twitter feed was any indication. You didn’t even try for one; you’re so broke you’d only be able to afford nosebleeds at best anyway, and the thought of being that close but that far from him makes your heart sink in a way you can’t quite understand.
“So I’ve heard. Am I gonna be your Uber driver again?”
“I probably won’t be able to get away, unfortunately.” He says, and you nod, leaning back against the cushions of your couch. Hearing that phrase never sucks any less, but you’re used to it. He’s a busy guy. Sex is nowhere near the top of the priorities list.
“But,” he continues, “I did get you a ticket, if you want it.”
The revelation shocks you, and your stomach turns a little. Better seats would be great, especially for free, but you have other reasons for not being an avid concert-goer.
Namjoon is an incredible performer, they all are, but the thought of standing in a massive crowd where people next to you are loudly obsessing over his thighs and his chest has never sounded particularly appealing. It’s not jealousy; you understand as well as anyone that he’s an attractive man, it’s just… it’s weird.
“Joon,” you start, with no idea how you’re supposed to phrase this. Who turns down a free ticket to a BTS concert?
“It’d be backstage in VIP, okay? I promise, the screaming isn’t so bad there.” Backstage? Your head swims. He pauses for a second, but can clearly tell you’re not convinced, and his tone softens. “I hated the thought of being so close to you and not doing anything about it. I really just want to see you, even if we can’t…” he clears his throat with a half-laugh. “You know, go for a drive.”
You absolutely do not feel like a VIP, but your heart jumps at the thought of seeing him before you can tell it not to.
“Okay,” you say. “I’ll be there.”
He can only chat for a few more minutes before he’s pulled away for the next thing on his schedule. After you hang up, you slide entirely off your couch and onto the floor in a daze, wondering what the hell you just agreed to.
~*~
It turns out attending a concert as a VIP guest is not that far off from your well-worn hotel ritual. You go through the familiar motions, flashing various people your ID and the badge around your neck, and you receive a security escort through the network of hallways that lead into the heart of the stadium.
At security’s direction, you hang a left, past a room where you see racks upon racks of clothes ready and waiting for quick changes, and you’re so distracted that you nearly collide into Jungkook. His eyes widen. “Oh, hi!”
You’ve met most of the members in passing– it’s sort of hard not to– but you’ve always had a particular soft spot for JK. It might have something to do with the time he voluntarily sexiled himself to Taehyung and Jimin’s room for a night so that Namjoon could invite you over. A true friend.
“Hi, Jungkook,” you say with a nervous smile.
“It’s good to see you! Namjoon said you were coming. He’s in the green room if you’re looking for him.” He gestures to a door at the end of the hallway, and you thank him as your pulse starts to race.
You gently push the door open and peek in. Namjoon is sitting alone at a chair in front of the vanity mirror, leaning forward to rest his elbows on his legs. He has headphones on, and his fingers are steepled, pressed to his lips. He’s clearly deep in thought, and a feeling washes over you like you shouldn’t be here, like maybe you should just turn around.
But then he glances over and sees you standing there, and his whole face lights up, those killer dimples on full display.
He slips his headphones off as you step inside; you can’t close the distance between the two of you fast enough. You loop your arms around his neck and he wraps his around your waist, and then you squeak as your feet leave the ground when he fully picks you up.
“Hi,” he says against your ear with a laugh, and when your feet make contact with the floor again, you push up on your tiptoes to kiss him.
Butterflies flutter in your stomach at the feeling of his lips on yours, his hands at the small of your back. Kissing Namjoon standing up doesn’t happen often, and it’s enough to give you a head rush.
His lips linger on yours as his hands travel gently downwards, and then he makes a noise of surprise against your mouth and pulls away.
“Oh my god,” he groans softly, pinching the fabric of your new favorite skirt between his fingers. “You did this on purpose.”
You can’t hide your wicked smile. “It’s possible. You did say you liked it, if I recall correctly.”
You lose your composure as his hands slip under your skirt to grab your ass. You inhale sharply, thankful that you’re alone. Namjoon’s mouth drops to your neck. “God, I wish we had more time,” he groans against your skin.
You should behave. The fact that you can see him and touch him should be more than enough, and you should just be grateful. But he really does make you insatiable. “I can be quick if you can,” you murmur against his ear.
His life-ruiningly big dick hardens against your thigh; you can feel every inch of it straining against the fabric of his pants, and you shift to grind your core against him.
“Fuck,” he hisses. Arousal floods through you at the notion of how close he is, the fact that only a few layers of clothes separate him from where you need him most. You’re already soaked, ready for all of him.
You hear a grunt and a shifting sound from behind you and nearly jump out of your skin, quickly leaping back to put some space between you and Namjoon. When you turn towards the source, you realize that you completely missed Yoongi, asleep on the green room couch.
Namjoon winces when you whip your head back to glare accusingly at him. “Sorry. I totally forgot he was there.”
You fix him in your gaze for a second, but you’re honestly too horny to stay mad. “To be fair, you were distracted.”
“Still am,” he grunts, running a hand over the front of his pants. You can only imagine the internet-wide panic that would ensue if he went out onstage this hard. The dick print blogs would have a field day. You’re frozen in place, ridiculously turned on but also starting to feel guilty for putting him in this predicament.
Namjoon crosses to the sofa, one hand slipping into his pants to tuck his erection into his waistband.
“Hyung,” he whispers, giving the couch a light kick.
Yoongi grunts again, but doesn’t move, eyes still closed.
“Hyung, I need the room for a minute.”
At this, he finally cracks an eye open. “Hmm?”
“Can you nap somewhere backstage?”
Yoongi squints at both of you as he slowly sits up. He looks pissed– although he kind of always looks like that, so maybe that’s just his face– but seems to realize he can get back to sleep faster if he doesn’t waste time on an argument.
He yawns as he shuffles out of the room, turning over his shoulder in the open doorway. “Just so you know, you’ve got like, five minutes.” Then he slams the door behind him.
Namjoon doesn’t waste even a second, instantly pulling you to him and finding your lips with his, tongue sweeping into your mouth. You let him guide you backwards until you’re pressed up against the green room door, and you hear the lock click.
His lips move to your neck again, his hands sliding up your thighs. “Can you do five minutes, baby?”
“Y-yes,” your answer turns into a whine as his hand brushes over your panties, and you spread your legs to give him more room. He pulls the fabric of your underwear to the side, and when he slips two fingers into your cunt, you both groan: you at the pleasure, and him at how little resistance there is when he pushes in.
“Fuck, you really want me, huh?” Namjoon practically growls into your ear, and you whimper open-mouthed as he curls his fingers inside you. He shifts and you can feel him pressed hard against your thigh, and your knees nearly buckle. “You want to take all of this?”
“God, yes.” You think you’ll die if you don’t.
He hesitates for just a second, clearly weighing some option in his head. Then he groans in your ear again. “Will you ride me, baby?”
You can’t even speak, but when he sees you nod, it’s enough. Pressing you up against the door, he lifts your legs to wrap around his waist, and then his hands move to cup your ass and pull you to him. He lifts you up and carries you like that across the room, his still-clothed erection grinding into your core. Your desire is almost painful now, you want him so bad.
He settles on the couch with you in his lap, and you lean forward on your knees so that he can fumble to undo his belt and pull his pants and boxers down.
There’s no time for the teasing you’re both so fond of, but you don’t feel like you could last a single second longer without him inside you. When you pull your panties to the side again so you can sink down on him, it’s fucking perfect, and you can’t hold back a moan of relief.
“Shit, baby,” Namjoon groans. His head drops against the couch and his hand is already on your clit in steady circles. The urgency just makes everything hotter.
You rock up and down along his length, and you’re so fucking wet that he easily bottoms out inside you, hitting the spot that makes you squeeze your eyes shut and gasp. Your arousal coils tight inside you, the pressure already building.
Namjoon’s fingers work you expertly, and he knows your mind just as well as your body. He knows the fastest way to get you to come is with his words, and he doesn’t hold back, his hips starting to rock up into you.
“You take my cock so well, baby, fuck. This tight little pussy was made just for me, huh?”
“Yes, yes, yes,” you whine with every thrust.
“Mine to have whenever I want, wherever I want. Always so fucking wet and ready for me, so desperate to take it all like a good girl.”
You whimper loudly in agreement. His cock, his hands, his voice, it’s all too much. He can feel your walls start to flutter and that only makes him thrust and circle his fingers faster, and your moans are nearly sobs now.
“That’s it, baby. Soak yourself for me. I want to feel you come all over my cock.”
“Oh, fuck!” You cry out as the pressure inside you swells and bursts, and you can feel the rush of fluid as it splashes over him and the couch beneath you.
Namjoon groans beneath you at the feeling, and you thank god he has the awareness and the strength to lift you up off of him, because it fully escaped you that he never put a condom on.
He strokes himself fast and hard, clearly just shy of his own end, and even now, you still can’t get enough. You drop to your knees on the floor and practically shove his legs apart so you can take him in your mouth, your cunt still quivering from the aftershocks of your orgasm.
“Holy shit,” he gasps as you bob up and down, sloppy and fast. When you swallow him down, gagging slightly, his hips buck against your mouth, and you take it all with a whimper as he comes down your throat.
You make sure to work every drop out of him before you pull off, sitting back on your heels and wiping at your mouth. You watch Namjoon as he collapses against the couch, breathing heavy and smiling wide. He runs a hand through his hair and looks down at you, clearly still trying to recover.
“You,” he says with a gasp, “are the best thing that’s ever happened to me.”
You beam at the compliment, and you stand up on shaking legs, reaching down to awkwardly adjust your underwear back in place. At his request, you circle around him to assess the damage as he pulls his pants up. 
It occurs to you only in hindsight that attempting a mess-free quickie with a girl who squirts is quite the lofty goal, but there doesn’t seem to be any sign of it on his clothes. The couch cushion, however, was not so lucky. You both giggle at the wet spot as he wraps his arms around you and presses a kiss to the top of your head.
“I think we’re at five,” you murmur, but he tilts your jaw up anyway, his lips finding yours for one more kiss.
He reluctantly walks you towards the door. “I gotta go get my mic, but if you head backstage to the left, there’s a spot where you can watch the show.” He presses his lips to your forehead one more time. “I’ll make it a good one for you.”
You laugh as he opens the door. “I’ll be watching, so you better not fuck up the choreo!”
For the second time tonight, you nearly run face-first into Jungkook. “Ah, sorry! Is my phone in here?” He shoves past you both and lets out a sigh of relief as he retrieves it from the vanity counter.
You give Namjoon a final smile and then head towards backstage, but you’re still in earshot to hear Jungkook ask, “What happened to the couch? Hyung, did you spill something?”
You press your hand to your mouth to hold the laughter in.
The show is even better than you thought it would be, and though you might just be imagining it, you swear Namjoon’s hip thrusts are a little more enthusiastic than usual.
A/N: i wrote this in like 30 minutes (so it is quite literally a quickie on a quickie) so if this is slightly lower quality than my usual, don't roast me!!! but i had so much fun revisiting these two!! hope you enjoyed, would love a comment or review if you did 💜 and i'm always tentatively open to requests, tho i have very little control over what will spark the muse lol. ALSO I SWEAR TO GOD THE ACTUAL NEXT THING I POST WILL BE LDOMLT 🙈 thanks for reading!!!!!
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llovelymoonn · a day ago
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can you make something about growing up lonely? ily <3
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
natalie diaz postcolonial love poem: "american arithmetic" (via @liriostigre) \\ amy dunne \\ stefanie schneider sisyphus (the girl behind the white picket fence) \\ anne sexton love poems: "the touch" \\ peter zelei bad dreams i. \\ adonis selected poems (khaled mattawa) (via @weltenwellen) \\ miloš ilić fresh mind \\ rick bursky the man with a hole in his head (via @everymanpdf)
kofi
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cluster-b-culture-is · a day ago
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Cluster B culture is dating your FP and constantly panicking about What If I’m Unintentionally Abusing Them & They Want To Leave But Feel Like They Can’t Oh God Am I Terrible Person
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incorrectbatfam · a day ago
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Did Dick have any regrets for saying any “holy _________ Batman!”
Absolutely
Not
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platoniclokiimagines · 2 days ago
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The reader gets hurt by a villain while out with loki, thor and asgardians. and Loki kills the villain instantly and then takes care of your wounds while also ranting about how angry he is that he couldn’t protect you
A/N: Slowly cleaning out my drafts so I can focus on my inbox. This was a fun one to write. I hope it was worth the wait!
WC: 1877
TW: Mention of blood, injury.
Rating: PG
“Don’t you worry, Y/N. You’ve got Loki and I and the wholerest of the Asgardians to help with the mission. What could possibly go wrong?”
Everything, itseemed, as an hour later you were cornered into a dimly-lit room with the badguy closing in on you. You’d known little about the guy the team had sent youon the mission to find. Just that he was located in Norway, only a few hundredkilometers from Tønsberg, that he was bad news, and that he had already hurtand killed at least a dozen people, and was rearing to do worse than that. Youdidn’t even know his name.
With the close proximity to New Asgard, Thor and Loki hadassured the team they and the Asgardians would be able to handle it, no issue,and you weren’t about to miss out on a trip to another country with your bestfriend, so you’d tagged along as backup to help with the mission, as well.
It had seemed like a foolproof plan, at the time.
You weren’t so sure now.
A bang behind you brought you back to reality, and youturned in time to see that the guy you were after had made his way into theroom with you, the door slamming shut behind him.
“I don’t think your little friends are going to be of anyhelp to you now,” he taunted, in a thick Norwegian accent. In differentcircumstances, you might have allowed yourself to be distracted with wonderingwhy Thor and Loki and the others didn’t have accents like that, but with thecurrent situation of a bit more pressing importance, you pushed the thoughtaside, tightening your grip on your gun, which felt absolutely helpless againstthe powers this guy seemed to be packing.
“I’m not scared of you. And I don’t need my friends toprotect me.” Quicker than a flash, you aimed the gun and shot, but the bulletstopped in midair as the man extended his hand, and with a wave, the bullet wassent into the wall with a muted sound of impact.
“Charming, for a human. What say we use your death to get a real reaction out of these Asgardians?Give them a real reason to fight, so they stop pulling their punches. How doesthat sound?” He raised both arms, and the debris on the ground lifted into theair, and with a twist of his hand, all the sharp edges pointed in yourdirection.
Over the pounding of your own heart in your ears, you couldhear Loki and Thor yelling over the comms, trying to figure out where you’dbeen trapped and how to get to you. Despite the ridiculously low likelihoodthat it would do anything, you raised your gun again, and shot round afterround at the man in rapid succession, but each one was directed away from himwith but a tilt of his head.
“Alright, that’s enough. Know that your sacrifice was forthe greater good.”
You opened your mouth to speak, but suddenly everything washappening at once. The door the man had come through was knocked off itshinges, Thor and Loki speeding through and yelling all at once as they bothwent to tackle the man to the ground, but even as they hit their mark, the manclenched his fist, and the debris went flying in your direction, faster thanyou had the time to react to.
Mere moments later, you were leaned against a wall, dustsettling around you and, for a moment, you thought you might have managed tomiraculously stay out of harm’s way.
And then you looked down, at the length of broken woodprotruding from your side.
Well, that wasn’t exactly good.
You were almost certain if you hadn’t been sitting alreadythat the sight alone would have made you stumble to the ground. As it was, youcouldn’t stop staring at the wound in an almost morbid curiosity, watching theblood seep through your shirt and trickle down to the ground.
That was when you heard the panicked yelling and screaming,and you looked up, vision doubling as your head swam at the sudden, nauseatingmovement. Thor and Loki were both looking at you in absolute horror, the manheld between them, grinning all the while. You blinked, and the next thing youknew, Loki had moved, snapping the man’s neck where he stood, and then stabbinghim in the chest, for good measure while Thor had hardly even realized what washappening.
The next second, Loki was at your side, yelling somethingabout Med-Evac to Thor over his shoulder.
“Y/N. Y/N.” Lokimoved so they were knelt right in front of you, ducking into your line ofvision, and you tried to manage a weak smile.
“Hey…” You felt so light. As though you could just floataway and join the stars. “…did we do it?” Your brain was more than a littlefuzzy. You’d just taken quite theblow, after all.
“…we did it. We did it, Y/N. But I need you to stay awakefor me now, can you do that? Please? For me?” Loki pressed their hands down onthe wound in an effort to staunch the bleeding, and you were almost certainthat you should have been able to feel something,but you just didn’t.
“…where’s everyone else?” you murmured, looking around theroom, as though that would provide you with the answer you were looking for.
“They’re fine. Everyone’s fine, Y/N, let’s just focus on younow. What are you gonna do, when we get back to New Asgard?” Despite their besteffort, they were failing at hiding the pure desperation in their voice as theyglanced over their shoulder at Thor, who was yelling something about someoneneeding to hurry up.
You hummed softly. “Nice hot shower… Maybe some food… Youguys always make the best food…” You wanted to say more, but you couldn’t quiteget your brain to form the sentences you wanted to say.
Loki nodded, mustering the best smile they could. “We’llmake you whatever you want. Everything you want. The finest Asgardian feastthis planet has ever seen, just… hold on,okay? We’re going to get you out of here.”
You smiled, blinking heavily. “Okay…” You let your eyesshut, unable to keep them open for any longer, and the very second you did, youcould feel every muscle in your body begin to relax.
“No, no, no. Keep your eyesopen. Y/N. Thor, tell them to hurry!Y/N?! Y/N!”
You woke slowly, and feeling no less light-headed than youhad the last time you remembered being awake.
When was the lasttime you remembered being awake?
You wracked your brain, trying to retrace your steps.
The battle, being cornered by the bad guy, the rubble beingthrown in your direction, Loki kneeling in front of you, trying to keep youawake.
For a fleeting moment you panicked, wondering if you weredead, and the thought sent you shooting upright in bed.
And then you realized just how much that hurt, and you yelped, collapsing backagainst the pillows as someone next to you put a hand on your shoulder.
“Easy…. You’ve been unconscious for three days and you’re very injured.”
You turned your head at the sound of Loki’s voice, remainingsilent as you tried to catch your breath after unintentionally exertingyourself. Loki met your gaze, concern evident in their eyes as they raised aneyebrow in a silent question of whether or not you were okay and, after amoment, you nodded a bit, settling yourself back against the pillows a tad morecomfortably.
“You lost a lot ofblood,” Loki answered you before you could even ask the question. “Passed outright in that building. Thought we’d lost you.” Loki was trying to keep theirvoice nonchalant, almost playful, but you could hear the razor-sharp edge ofstress lining it.
You wanted to address it, but Loki, again, beat you to thepunch, clasping their hands into fists in their lap as they looked at you.
“What the hel wereyou thinking, running off like that? You had no business going after someonewith magic when all you had was your gun. You could have died. Norns, you almost did, and you would have, if I hadn’t… IfThor and I hadn’t… Dammit, I shouldhave been in there with you. We were supposed to be partners on this mission,and I never should let you out of my sight. I let you down. And you almost lostyour life because of it.” With that, Loki stood so abruptly that you startled,wincing when it sent a jolt of pain through the bandaged wound on your side. Youwatched in silence for a few long moments as they paced in front of the bed you’dbeen laid in, uncertain if they were finished or if they had more to say.
When it became clear that Loki was more intent dwelling ontheir imagined failure, you heaved a sigh, shifting a little to try and makeyourself more comfortable. “Loki, what happened wasn’t your fault. He was ashitty guy with a shitty attitude who was going to kill whoever he could manageto. I was just the one he was able to corner.”
“Which wouldn’t have happenedif I had been with you. I could have stopped him with my powers. I know I couldhave.”
“And you did. He can’t hurt me, or anyone else, ever again.I’m alive because of you. Do youunderstand that? You stopped himbefore he could do anything else, and yeah, maybe I caught a bit of bad luckand will have some major recovery todeal with because of that, but… I’m alive.If anything is your fault, it’s that.And I don’t think me being alive is anything to beat yourself up over, so… Canwe calm down on the pity party just a tad, huh?” You didn’t say it to be mean.You were just saying it in terms that you knew Loki would react to the best,and when they finally heaved a sigh and stopped pacing, you relaxed a little,knowing you’d achieved your goal.
“I just… You scared meto death. And all I could think about was being the reason someone else wasdead.” Loki’s voice was soft, with a heaviness to it that you didn’t know youcould quite comprehend.
“But you weren’t. I’m alive. You’re alive. And he’s not. And that’s all that matters. Yes?”
After a long moment, Loki nodded, finally looking back up atyou with much less guilt in their expression.
“Yes.”
“Alright, then. No harm done. We’re okay, right?”
Loki blinked a bit at that. “Of course we’re okay.”
You nodded. “Alright.”
You let a comfortable silence settle over the both of you asLoki moved to sit back down in the chair at your bedside, and you would havebeen content to let the silence linger for a little while longer.
But you were nothing, if not a little shit.
“Now. Bring me that feast you promised me. I’m famished.”
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probieravi · 16 hours ago
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buddie & 2.) things you said through your teeth and/or 20.) things you said that i wasn’t meant to hear
we didn't know each other (but baby it was fate) buddie | different first meetings | 1700 words
Look—Eddie isn’t blind, alright?
Sure, he spent more than thirty years of his life deeply repressed and refusing to label himself as gay, but he’s worked through all that. It took a shit ton of therapy, a lot of self-reflection, and more than a few wine nights with Karen, but he got there. Eventually.
So, when he says that the guy sitting across from him at physio is hot—well. He’s not so repressed anymore that he can’t freely admit it. Take that, Frank.
Eddie pulls out his phone from the pocket of his sweats, slouching down in his seat a little so that he can glance at the blond-haired, blue-eyed dreamboat without raising suspicion. He navigates to his text thread with Karen and Hen, typing out a quick message.
Eddie
    There's this guy at PT. Like a stupidly hot guy
Hen
    Edmundo, I'm working right now
Karen
    I'm not!
    Tell me about him
    No, wait. Send me a picture
Eddie
    I absolutely will not send you a picture of the stranger in my physio's office
Karen
    You're the worst
Eddie
    You love me
Karen
    I'd love a picture more
Eddie pauses, lip caught between his teeth. One picture couldn’t hurt, right? The guy is absorbed in his book — it’s brightly colored and looks like it’s about…cults? — so it’s not like he’s looking at Eddie. Eddie could definitely sneak a picture. It’s for Karen, anyway. Not for him.
That’s what he tells himself as he taps into his camera app and balances his phone on his sternum so he can get a full-body shot of the man. He’s wearing a pair of grey sweatpants and a baby blue hoodie that’s doing wonders for his eyes, and there’s a birthmark, Eddie thinks, over his eyes that he’d really like to press his thumb to, for some reason. The man is so engrossed in his weird cult book that Eddie thinks it’ll be no issue to take a quick snap, send it to Karen, and get on with his day.
Except, the last person who used the camera was Christopher, who had the flash on because he was taking a picture of the underneath of his bed, and Eddie’s sound is perpetually on high just in case there’s an emergency and someone needs to get a hold of him. Normally, neither of those things would matter, really, but apparently, they do when you’re being a fucking creep in the waiting room of your physiotherapist to appease your nosy friend’s curiosity.
That’s all to say—
The flash goes off, the camera makes an awfully loud shuttering noise, and Eddie says through his teeth, “Oh, Jesus fucking Christ.”
The man looks up, and Eddie’s pretty sure he’d prefer to be in Afghanistan right now, because there’s absolutely no way he can talk himself out of this. They’re the only people in the waiting room beside Anita, the receptionist, and Eddie certainly isn’t pointing his phone at her.
“I am—” Eddie starts, wincing before he can even get the rest of the words out. He’s genuinely going to kill Karen after he changes his name and finds a new physiotherapist and probably gets a goddamn face transplant or something. “So sorry,” he finishes, a little lamely.
The guy tilts his head a little, tipping his book down so it’s resting on his knee. “Did you just take a picture of me?”
“No,” Eddie says immediately, before he glances down at where his phone is still pointing at the other man. He drops it into his lap and makes a wounded noise. “Okay, yes. But it’s not what you think.”
“So you’re not taking photos of strangers in your PT’s office with your flash and sound on?” he asks, sounding all too knowing for Eddie’s comfort.
Eddie bites on the corner of his mouth. Anita’s got a pair of AirPods in, completely oblivious to their conversation, so she’s going to be no help. He briefly considers actually fleeing, but getting this final clearance from Jasper is required to put him back on full duty, so the department knows his shoulder is back to its pre-shooting self. And it’s not like Bobby’s actively been keeping him out of the action, but he’s definitely been more careful; Eddie’s been running the winch for Tommy and Chim more than he’s been doing anything himself, and pretty much everyone at the station refuses to let him lift more than fifty pounds, so yeah. Eddie really needs Jasper to sign off on his back-to-work forms.
“Okay,” Eddie drawls, dragging out the word a little. “So it was it looks like. But it’s not—I promise I’m not. A serial killer, or something.”
“Do serial killers generally take pictures of their victims?” the man asks, a little curious. “I feel like that would be a crime blunder. It’s like, literally evidence.”
Eddie blinks. “Are you an expert on the inner workings of serial killers?”
“I listen to a lot of true crime podcasts.” The blond purses his lips, narrowing his eyes a little. “You don’t look like a serial killer. Neither did Ted Bundy, though, I guess.”
“I think that’s a compliment,” Eddie says, frowning. “That’s a compliment, right?”
“Was taking my picture a compliment?”
“Yes,” he says, too quickly to pass off as anything but embarrassingly earnest.
The guy grins. “Then yes, that was a compliment.”
And Eddie—blushes, because apparently, he’s sixteen years old and still being teased by his older sisters about being overly attached to Leo Vasquez from his homeroom. “I’m uh, Eddie. Diaz,” he says. It’s only polite. That’s obviously the only reason he does it.
“Evan Buckley,” he says, and then pauses, amends, “Buck, actually.”
“Buck,” Eddie echoes, and there’s something—familiar about that, actually, but he can’t quite place his finger on it. Maybe they’ve met on a call? Except Eddie’s certain that if he ever met Evan Buckley before, he’d remember, because he’s—
Yeah. Eddie’s still blushing.
“Nice to meet you, man,” he says, hoping his voice sounds at least halfway to normal. “You uh—what are you doing here?”
Eddie wishes, actually, that he’d never started therapy. At least when he was a repressed mess, he didn’t shove his foot so far into his own mouth that he could feel it in his stomach.
Eddie’s about to stand up and walk out of Jasper’s office and right into the street, probably, but then Buck laughs, all bright and sunny, the corners of his eyes crinkling, and Eddie shrinks back into his chair, the back of his neck hot.
“What are any of us doing here?” Buck says, waving his book around to gesture to the room. “I had a crush injury a few years back. I still do physio from time to time, when it gets bad.”
And suddenly, Eddie knows exactly where he knows Buck from. He snaps his fingers, pointing, like an absolute fool. “You’re Buck.”
Buck blinks. “Yeah. I thought we established that already?”
“No, like,” Eddie says, and he flaps a hand through the air too, “you’re Buck.”
“You’re losing me, man.”
“Evan Buckley of the 118,” Eddie explains, watching as something in Buck’s eyes flicker. “Right? The crush injury—two years ago, the ladder truck—”
“I didn’t realize I was a household name,” Buck says with an easy grin, but Eddie can see something beneath it, something hesitant. Like he’s used to getting sorrys or condolences for the injury that took him out of commission permanently. 
“You are at the 118,” Eddie says. “My team—man, they sing your praises so hard. I feel like a probie in your shadow, man.”
“You’re at the 118?”
“Have been since the tsunami,” Eddie confirms. “I was at the 136 before, but our station was shut down, and I got transferred permanently.” He pauses, leaning back a little in his seat. Both their feet are kicked out, and if Eddie just stretched a little bit, he’d knock the toes of their sneakers into each other. “I kind of feel like I’m meeting a celebrity.”
“You’re exaggerating,” Bucks says, just as a pretty blush begins creeping its way up his neck. “I’m not—it’s not a big deal. It was just a freak accident—”
“Buck,” Eddie says, and he does knock their feet together then, just to get Buck to look up at him. “It’s not—they don’t talk about your injury.”
Buck blinks at him. “What?”
“They talk about you, man. About how good of a firefighter you are, and how you’re a pretty great guy too. The stories I’ve heard from Bobby about your probie year, and Chimney’s always talking about hanging out with his brother-in-law, and Hen can’t stop extolling your virtues when it comes to how you’re so eager to watch Denny whenever you can—Buck, they talk about you.”
Buck’s mouth opens, closes, opens again. Finally, he says, “They do?”
“They miss you.” Eddie pauses, waits until Buck meets his eyes again, and then grins, soft and warm and with his teeth poking out. “You should come visit sometime.”
“Yeah,” Buck says, and he smiles too, less bright but still genuine, and Eddie feels it down to his bones, “I just might.”
“Eddie?” Anita calls from behind the desk. It snaps them out of their moment, feet darting back beneath their chairs, and Buck smiles a little sheepishly at Eddie as he nods toward the front counter.
“I’ll see you later. Maybe at the firehouse.” He seems less than sure about it, and Eddie is suddenly desperate to see him again, to talk to him more, to learn not just about the Buck that belongs to the 118, but also the real Buck—the one that’s sitting in the PT waiting room reading about cults, and wearing a soft blue hoodie, and smiling with his dimples. 
Eddie wants to know him, so he says, “Could I get your number?”
“My number,” Buck echoes, blinking at him. Eddie thinks, briefly, that he’s made a mistake, misread the signals, but then Buck’s smile grows, teeth on display, and Eddie feels warm down to his bones. “Sure. I’d like that.”
They exchange numbers quickly, Eddie sending Buck a message so he has his — if he puts a blue heart at the end of his hello, that’s between him and God — and then Eddie waves a little lamely, about to head off to his session, when—
“And Eddie?”
He turns around, glancing at where Buck still sits, grin bolstering and warm. “Yeah?”
“Feel free to use that picture of me for my contact photo.”
And yeah. Eddie thinks he probably owes Karen a thank you.
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seethemflying · a day ago
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so in how many ways is brienne problematic™? i feel like we don't talk about brienne's flaws enough :////
Yes, absolutely
First time we see her, she beats up Loras = homophobic
Is infatuated with Renly = homophobic (again)
Is constantly mean to Jaime = ableist
Calls Jaime 'Kingslayer' when he asks her not to = no manners
Attempts to kill a defenceless bear = animal abuser
Thinks about Jaime naked a lot = masturbator
Chops a dude's hand off = ableist (again)
Is incapable of finding Sansa = bad navigator
with thanks to this masterpiece of a tumblr post
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p1neapplerum · 17 hours ago
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i request Tango Tek pls I’m begging /lh /nf
heem
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