#another canon scene altered - can you guess which one? ;>

[total-drama-brainrot]

TD World Tour AU, where Noah doesn't tell Owen that Alejandro is an eel in London... In Area 51, Noah is accidentally splashed with an alien truth potion (which wears off after a few days) and he talks to Owen... Owen asks Noah what he truly thinks about Alejandro, and Truth-Potion Affected Noah says this: "I have mixed feelings for Alejandro. He's a brilliant, interesting guy and I like him, but I don't trust him. He's like a slippery eel dipped in grease, swimming in motor oil. Basically, Heather with social skills. Wait a minute, why am I telling you this?!"... What if Alejandro secretly heard Noah call him all those conflicting things + Alejandro also learns that Noah is affected with an alien truth potion? 👽

Alright, you got me. I'm an absolute sucker for truth potion plots, especially when the character(s) effected by them are usually either pathological liars or incredibly secretive- of which Noah absolutely falls into the second category, given he shares so little personal information.

I'll gloss over why Noah declined to shit-talk Alejandro in London (though there's so many ways this change in behaviour could be justified) since the focal point of this hypothetical centred around their time in Nevada, so let's start from the beginning of the Area 51 challenge.

Area 51:

Before we start, it'll have to be established that no one was eliminated in London. Let's say that the majority vote went towards Duncan (team CIRRRRH voted him out immediately because they found his re-admission to the competition unfair, I guess. I imagine he'd also vote himself, if not as a plan to escape the competition he'd been actively skiving from, then just as an act of spite) but Chris instead claimed it was a rewards challenge- much like he does in Greece- because he doesn't want to let Duncan slip away again so soon.

I see no reason to alter the first part of the challenge- the sneaking into Area 51 portion- since team CIRRRRH's course of entry is fairly straightforward. Noah's presence doesn't make much of a difference to how it would play out; the majority of them throw their rocks and run, Owen gets lasered over the fence and Owen-napped, ect ect.

When both teams have managed to make their way into the Black Box Warehouse, Noah immediately suggests they should prioritise rescuing Owen. Tyler's quick to agree, since he's a firm believer in the "no man left behind" mentality (and he probably makes a not-so-subtle jab towards Noah for his chance of tune compared to London, where both he and Owen did leave Tyler behind) leaving Duncan and Alejandro to split from the group- Duncan in search of Gwen, and Alejandro just takes the opportunity to finally be free from his 'incompetent teammates' and prioritises finding an artifact.

Noah and Tyler come across the contraption Owen's trapped in, Tyler punches it in a futile effort to break it open, and the face hugger cube drops into Noah's hands. This is where the point of divergence comes into play; Tyler has his E.T. moment with one of the face huggers, but Noah- who's a tad bit more observant than Alejandro, and used to dodging surprise attacks from his various older siblings (and Izzy)- anticipates his own face hugger attack and promptly starts a game of cat-and-mouse with a taser alien hot on his heels.

The commotion of which attracts the rest of his team. Alejandro and Duncan arrive on the scene to see Tyler being electrocuted by an alien and Noah running in circles evading another.

Duncan attempts to rip the face hugger from Tyler's face, finding success at the cost of sending Tyler trampling into Owen's captive contraption (essentially taking Alejandro's canonical place in this scene) and inadvertently freeing Owen.

Meanwhile, Alejandro swipes up the nearest box he can find and snags the alien chasing Noah, who's still very loudly panicking as he flees, and succeeds! The alien is swiftly captured into the box, netting team CIRRRRH their artifact, and Noah promptly goes careening into the nearest tower of junk in his face hugger-fuelled hysteria. This causes another box to topple from the peak of the tower, landing directly on Noah's head and spilling its contents onto the bookworm- glass vials filled with a mysterious, luminescent cobalt blue liquid shatter into pieces drenching Noah in whatever they contained. (i.e. truth potion.)

Owen has his false-amnesia moment, characterised by his Joker makeover, and Alejandro enacts his revenge post-hypnotic suggestion after being addressed as "Al" one too many times.

Noah, understandably, swiftly objects to Owen's treatment and demands that Alejandro snap him out of it. Alejandro concedes, and Owen's brought back to himself. At least, for a moment, before the fatigue of having his mind messed with sends Owen into near-catatonia (the same as canon), meaning he has to be ferried through the Warehouse and back to the Jet by Alejandro and Duncan.

Things carry on canonically from there; Noah's just sort of there for the most part, though there'd be a minor hint to his newfound proclivity for honesty. Something along the lines of him giving an uncharacteristically honest answer to Owen as to who he's voting- Tyler, of course, since he was the one who ultimately threw the challenge for them... and also because Tyler still holds some resentment towards Noah for what happened in London, and Noah feels guilty about it every time he looks at the jock. Wait, why did he say that?

Sometime between this and the elimination scene, Noah wipes the truth-goop off of himself, but not before the effects have already started.

Tyler's voted out, yada yada yada.

The Jet:

Thus begins the start of "Picnic at Hanging Dork". Team CIRRRRH, consisting of just Alejandro, Duncan, Owen and Noah, are slumming it up in the Economy Cabin. Alejandro tries to rally his team by asking how to break apart Courtney and Heather's tentative co-operation. Owen suggests having Alejandro seduce Heather, since it worked for both Bridgette and Leshawna. Duncan makes his "Babe Olympics" comment. Noah pipes up that playing with someone's feelings is pretty scummy, even for someone competing for a million dollars.

Alejandro takes Noah's reluctance towards his methodology poorly; he hadn't spoken up before, when Alejandro had utilized the same strategy against other girls- and even Owen noticed that, so surely Noah did too- so why was he to outwardly against him using the same tricks? Duncan agrees, and offers ''his'' idea of having Alejandro flirt with Courtney to throw both her and Heather off their games (since Heather has an obvious crush on Alejandro), and things follow canon.

Then, the scene between Alejandro and Courtney happens. Noah scoffs at the display from the side lines, prompting Owen to ask him why he's so against Alejandro's plan.

"I mean, you never said anything before, when he flirted with Bridgette and Leshawna." Owen comments, light-hearted in nature but with an underlying questioning tone.

Noah's eyes flicker with a cobalt glow, easily mistaken for a trick of the light, and he speaks without even thinking.

"Yeah, because I was trying to give him the benefit of the doubt. Bridgette was happenstance, and Leshawna's whole deal could've been a coincidence, or some massive misunderstanding. But this?" Noah extends an accusing hand out towards a smug looking Alejandro, then pans it over to a flattered Courtney, "He's outright toying with Courtney's feelings after she was cheated on in front of an international audience. It's scummy."

Owen nods in understanding, momentary contemplation evident in the pouted curve of his lips, and he chimes in.

"Does that mean you don't like Al?"

"I never said that."

"Well, how do you feel about him, then?"

Again, a flash of blue light against the hickory backdrop of Noah's eyes, and he responds thoughtlessly.

"I guess I have mixed feelings about him. On the one hand, he's slippery, like an eel dipped in grease, swimming in motor oil. He's like if you took all of the worst aspects of Heather, wrapped them up in a pretty package, and gave them social skills..." He holds his hands out before him in a scale-like manner, with the left tipped downwards and tie right raised by his chin. Then, the two hands swap positions.

"And on the other hand, he's brilliant. I've never met anyone as talented as Alejandro; he's smart, he's athletic, he's funny. It's almost unfair just how perfect everything about him is- even his face is perfect. It's ridiculous! Infuriating, even. It's so hard to dislike him, even when I know he's bad news, but that doesn't mean I trust him."

Owen stands slack jawed beside his best friend, both impressed and stunned at the raw honesty of Noah's tirade. Noah, now a little more aware of himself, realises that he's said more than he intended to- more than he thinks he's ever spoken in one go throughout the entirety of Total Drama. He's not usually one for speeches, after all, let alone honest ones.

He's always been the type to play his cards close to his chest, so why...?

"I, uh, didn't mean to go off like that."

And he also didn't mean to admit it, either. What was going on?

The look Owen gives him is, in a word, vivid. The blonde has a shit-eating grin stretching across his face, a sort of elated smugness practically glowing from his features.

"Sounds like someone has a cruuuush!~"

What? No? No! Not at all, where would Owen even get that idea?!

Noah splutters to correct Owen's assumption (to disastrous results, because he does sort-of has a crush on Alejandro, so the truth potion doesn't allow him to outright deny it), and in his preoccupied state he misses how a calculating pair of sage green eyes never seems to stray from him.

Alejandro has a lot to think about in regards to a certain cynic, it seems.

#I'd like to apologise for taking this idea and running with it. #Cutting myself off here before I breach 2k+ words or else I'll be here all day. #Sort of entered actual Writing Mode at the end there instead of Outline Mode but this idea is. So Full Of Potential I couldn't help myself. #But from here it'd basically be Alejandro using his newfound knowledge of Noah's crush on him to his advantage. #Whilst Noah's doing his best (and failing) to deny that he has any feelings for Alejandro. #Eventually leading to the two of them having a Bonding Moment where Alejandro gets Noah to divulge some personal information. #And in turn- or an effort to garner some trust (to be abused later)- Alejandro also lets himself be vulnerable towards Noah. #Something something Alejandro tries to use Noah as a pawn but ends up catching feelings of his own. #Then of course the potion wears off and Noah goes back to being just as prickly and standoffish as he was before. #A point of conflict maybe? Imagine bearing your soul out to someone only for them to close themself off to you not even days afterwards. #...Also imagine being practically forced to divulge information about yourself to someone you don't trust because of a truth potion. #Oh yeah. That's some good angst material right there. #Especially is you have Alejandro be- if not fully aware- than at least suspect that Noah's not being agreeable on his own terms. #Anon why have you given me The Thoughts?? I can't keep brainstorming AUs when I already have fics to work on!! #ophe's ranting in the tags again #total drama #td noah #td alejandro #team chris is really really really really hot #alenoah #-ish #silly ideas #other's ideas #long post #replies #kinda drafty in here (posts from the drafts)

[floareadeaur]

Now, since vampires do not have any desires other than the desire for blood, it makes me wonder 'how would a vampire like Ferid be in bed?' Don't get me wrong, I understood your analysis of him and I also believe that he has a 'human soul' and he's not an usual vampire. How would he and his lover be intimate? Your fics also made me curious. I see that you present him as a 'vanilla' man, which suits him perfectly actually. It just makes me curious, and I wish to ask you for a few hcs about how Ferid would be in bed. A lot of people in the fandom see him as a villain and a psychopath, which automatically makes them think that Ferid would be 'rougher' in bed. I believe that he would also have some bdsm kinks, but he may prefer softer and loving moments.

《 Warning: Very long essay on the sexual dimension of vampires and a brief portrayal of how I see Ferid making love to his woman. Detailed scenes, analysis, philosophy maybe? Who is actually reading this? 》

Hello!

Interesting ask and quite detailed.

But I think there are more perspectives here.

From a canon perspective, I am pretty sure vampires are absolutely infertile. If they can not cry, I guess the only functional fluid in them is blood?

That would mean no sperm in male vampires.

That is from a purely biological perspective though, which I do not know how completely true it is in OnS, where, to me at least, vampires are both a biological and mythological species, given that Sika's own frustrations, resentments, and suffering have determined "the birth of the first vampire".

I mean, it does not say anywhere that vampires can not be sexually functional at all, just that they have no interest in anything but blood.

So I think that here we can find a "loophole" and rely a lot on the psychological dimension.

We have seen that vampires can feel many, many feelings. So, despite the condition that alters their personality and even their memories due to endless life, their human souls remain alive, even if most deny it and choose the phrase "we don't have feelings".

It is on this principle that I draw the conclusion that vampires can fall in love romantically and these feelings of an erotic nature awaken in them a functionality of their sexual organs.

How does this sexual functionality manifest itself?

Once, in my view, it is only caused by extremely strong, genuine, romantic, erotic feelings (the love of their life), then I think there is a general manifestation for all vampires.

Why am I saying this?

You know, vampires can be dismembered. But they feel pain when it happens, terrible, enormous pain. The way they hear, see, feel is much amplified, to a terrible intensity. They are constantly subjected to great sensory stimulations, which for newborn vampires are even painful or aggressive. Of course, with time they get used to it and learn to live with this, but the terrible pain remains, the excessive sensitivity.

They feel this great pain, but their bodies regenerate infinitely.

Therefore, I conclude in my interpretation that they can be sexually active with their loved one, and all the feelings and sensations during intercourse, including arousal, orgasm, would feel greatly amplified for them.

Just as pain and all other perceptions are amplified to vampires.

I can go into more detail from here, but I do not want to make this post too long. You can ask me about this topic if you are interested and I will elaborate in another post!

Now, I made a kind of introduction to explain my interpretation that vampires can have a sexual dimension.

I think I can now focus on your question about Ferid.

Obviously, every vampire was a human person and has a human soul.

So everyone would have their own particularities in intimacy with their loved one.

About Ferid I can say that he is psychologically unchanged from his human life. My belief is that this is due to his soul and mind feeling "too much".

His memory never forgets anything, so memories are always alive in his mind, even as a vampire. This is worth emphasizing, because it is specified in the novels that vampires tend to forget a lot due to the passage of time.

Then he feels everything "very much". Ferid has an ideal, an ideal as high as that of changing the rotten origin of the world. That can not be born from a soul that does not feel, you know?

There is a great sensitivity in Ferid, I think.

Indeed, an unparalleled sensitivity that keeps his humanity alive regardless of the context, or his condition of vampirism.

That is why I consider him not a man wounded by vampirism, but a man wounded by the putrid world around him and that his life is a continuous line, not fragmented into "Ferid the human" and "Ferid the vampire". It is a line to which Ferid is looking for a meaningful end. I think this metaphor well illustrates Ferid's desire to break "that vicious circle of reincarnation", among other things.

Obviously, there are some difficulties imposed by his condition as a vampire, such as a diet based only on blood, animalistic instincts to drain people of blood to death, the inability to go without blood for more than three days, and an endless, aimless life, just like another "reincarnation circle", but now in one body.

Above all, Ferid hates this vampire condition, as he declared, considering it a "curse".

But back to your basic question.

I do not comment much on the fandom's interpretation of him.

Personally, I do not consider myself a part of this fandom, although in theory I am.

But I noticed many stereotypes falling on many characters, not only on Ferid. And my only answer is that everyone sees in a character what they want and what they can do.

The canon material is right there and anyone can read it, analyze it, re-read it, or just ignore it and choose the stereotypes, as many do!

In the end, it is everyone's freedom and from here on I will present you my vision of Ferid Bathory.

I have to say that these "vanilla" labels, or the BDSM spectrum, are not something I use in the description.

So I can not give an answer within these areas. I know it is a classification used in the hcs / x reader section of fandoms. I find it dry and mechanical, to be honest.

For me, eroticism, the intimate love between a man and a woman cannot fall under labels. I see the whole dynamic as far too organic and derived from the very lives of the two involved to reduce it to a set of labels.

I do not know how much you will appreciate my description further, but I guess if you were interested in my opinion, maybe we resonate?

I see that for Ferid, sexual intimacy with his beloved woman is something very sensitive and fragile for his being.

Disgusted by the thirst of those around him for "material power" since adolescence and tormented by the search for a truth, a harmony in his broken world, he is not attracted to the carnal just for the sake of the carnal.

Eroticism for Ferid derives from his complex of feelings and desires for the woman he loves.

Ferid is deeply philosophical, I think I can even call him "romantic", despite his realism and sharp logic. After all, his suffering stems from his idealism, which derives from the very deep sensitivity of his soul.

I do not know if I can string some "sexual hcs" about him here. I do not like to just collect some ideas in the form of "hcs", I am always looking for the most organic form.

Therefore I will now detail how I see him touching his beloved woman. I think this is important.

Ferid may seem frozen at first, stiff. He can even look at her for hours.

Maybe it is time for him to settle into being himself with her, beyond any masks. And something related to the profound affective deprivation he suffered as a child.

Or, simply, his need to have quality time with the one who understands and genuinely loves him.

Every second spent around her breathing is "quality time" for Ferid.

Despite this attitude, in which Ferid seems stiff in this state of "observation" of her, the girl can deeply feel how his gaze is always on her, and the feeling is not a disturbing one.

Yes, he may look intimidating with his red eyes focused deep on her, but it is just determination and dedication in the way he looks at his lover.

She can feel how no one has looked at her before this way; in fact, with such tenderness, cherishing.

Ferid's gaze is not uncomfortable. On the contrary, it gives her so much peace and a charming feeling that pleases her whole being.

Beyond his apparent "reluctance", his gaze is so warm.

Likewise, Ferid's touch begins lightly.

His cold palm resting on her knee covered by the dress, as she continued to read that book of hers.

A light, delicate but firm touch of his whole palm, with those long and bony fingers of his.

She can feel the tension in his touch, the determination.

Then the touch flows smoothly. His arm encircles her belly so pleasantly, his palm then goes up to her sternum until it rests on the area of ​​her heart that beats so fast for him.

Under his touch, she goes soft, precisely because she feels this complete safety.

For Ferid leads every touch, he is purposeful.

Even if his hand ever trembles, his touch is not weak, one which would "run away" at any time. There is such deep care and such perfect determination.

In the end, Ferid's touches are driven by the desire to feel her, to devote himself to this genuine love offered to one like him.

Slowly, his palm reaches her shoulder that tenses slightly under his caress that slides down her beautiful arm.

Ferid cupped her palm in his. The center of his hand is pressed against her warm one, their fingers intertwining together. He looks at her just as focused, attentive. There is the same passionate tenderness in the way Ferid gazes his eyes on her.

Ferid knows what is in front of him: everything he is ever longed for.

His genuine love and acceptance is right there, in this woman.

His free palm rested on her other knee. Ferid leans over her with the same unsmiling expression, but so beautiful in its depth.

As her back sinks into the couch, Ferid bends over her until he is completely covering her body, his still-clothed hips pressing against her womb, still covered by her dress, where the book she read few moments ago had been.

The book is somewhere on the small table next to the sofa where they desire to make love. He slipped it out from between their bodies.

And from here, Ferid manifests himself totally freely.

Crawling like a snake over her, thrusting his body sensually between her thighs so far apart that her knees resembled a pair of butterfly wings.

I think about how he was forced in his family to play the role of an obedient, submissive son. But his reality is that Ferid has a potential which must be offered to a goal. He has leadership capabilities to achieve that goal. He is actually dynamic, like a sun.

This is very clear to me in the way Ferid would lead the swing on her body from their intimate act and would "crawl" over her almost desperately.

Covering her body completely, savoring every contact with her entire being.

I see how much he needs to feel her warm skin under his naked body, to feel her completely. How he hugs her so much, kisses her feverish lips deeply, looks into her eyes that remind him of the sky — that place where he always looked for love.

And now, the "little sky" beyond her gaze answers him with everything Ferid ever wanted.

Again, his touches are careful but firm.

There is a stormy passion, but a mathematical, meticulous care.

All because Ferid knows what precious "good" he holds in his arms.

And now I kind of created a little scenario...

But to give a conclusion, I see, that by loving her, Ferid sinks into his own soul. And so, everything must be taken lightly, carefully. Intimate love is no exception in this regard.

There is a burning passion in which he immerses himself meticulously along with her. After all, his memory that refuses to forget anything must be holding something really good now. Ferid wants to live these moments to the fullest.

I can go into a lot more detail, but I am trying to give a pleasant ending.

I see that Ferid is conducting the intimate act. His every touch is careful yet confident. When he touches her, it feels that he does not let her go for nothing in the world.

She can rely on him, sink into his touches and open up to Ferid like a flower with its soft petals offered to him willingly and piously, in an almost holy way.

Maybe that is why I see that the way he would most often make love to his woman would be with her beneath him and her knees so far apart, Ferid covering her completely and manifestating himself freely, crawling with mad determination on top of her body to love his woman.

In their intimacy, Ferid can offer his full potential — the philosophical, even spiritual fragility of his soul full of need for soft affection, for tenderness and the dynamism to lead the "goal", full of safety and determination — for him to always be there for her, the one who gives him something geniune and harmonious in that putrid world, already breaking that circle for him.

Honestly, I feel like what I wrote is pretty chaotic. Who will read this?

I can elaborate more on the dynamic between Ferid and the woman he loves, the way he makes love to her.

Maybe I do not write very "standard". The truth is, I am used to writing prose and especially writing Ferid in a dynamic with my original character, that is, in an extremely detailed, organic, human setting.

So I do not think I am very good at writing 'x reader', or portraying hcs about everything in the usual way.

Maybe I feel this character is too complex for that, or I love writing him too much in all his fascinating nuances.

Anyway, I enjoy looking into different topics and thanks for taking an interest in my interpretation!

You can come back with more specific questions about the topic.

Actually, I feel like I need more specific questions so I do not end up creating an endlessly long essay on Ferid. (I already did this. )

Finally, what attracted you to my fics? I am curious about that. Or, why did you write to me?

In general, I am genuinely curious as to why people want my take on a character. What do they see in my analyses, writings that makes them want more?

Finally, again, come back with questions if you want, kind feedback is welcome, and thanks to anyone reading this!

I wish a good to anyone who finds this post! ( it is so long I think I should put the wish at the beginning if I want my attempt to make someone's day better to work. But that is just me! Thank you!)

#ferid bathory #owari no seraph #seraph of the end #ons #sote #ferid bathory x reader #ferid bathory imagines #ferid bathory headcanons #ferid bathory analysis

[writingformyblorbos]

It's cloudy above (Part 4)

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Jake Lockley/Steven Grant/Marc Spector × gn!Reader (hints of Layla × Reader in the future?) Summary: Harrow is alive, which means Ammit is as well. You have to find him before it's too late. Warnings: Things are going to get a bit angsty. Canon typical violence (guns, stabbing, wounds, murder in general), mentions of DID and anxiety. A somewhat grafic wound description. Not proof read (I don't know if I don't get my things proofread because I'm too lazy to ask or because I'm afraid of being judged by others. Guess we'll never know) Word cound: 4.3k (don't ask me how I did it, idk either) a/n: I want to thank Jennifer Saunders for making the I need a hero cover for Shrek 2, otherwise I would’ve had no idea on how to vizualize the action scene, which would’ve led me to give up on ica altogether. Also it’s probably going to be bad, but I beg you to please cut me some slack, it’s my first time writing a fight scene. Anywho, please enjoy!!!

If you had asked yourself a few days ago what you would be doing Wednesday evening, your best guess would’ve been watching a movie, reading a book, perhaps going out for some drinks with Colt if you were feeling a little bold. However, getting ready to infiltrate a cult to try and get some information on its leader’s whereabouts who posed a worldwide threat was definitely not something you planned on adding to your schedule.

You’d had your fake story revised by Layla, Steven, and Marc: your name was Sunny, and you had just been kicked out of your flat because you couldn’t afford rent anymore. You were one of the many people lost in the Snap, and once you’d returned, your life had been turned upside down. Your job? Terminated. Your parents? Dead. With no support system, you were an ideal target for a cult. You only hoped the fanatics would find it convincing enough.

Marc and Steven had stayed back at their flat, most likely coming to terms with the fact that there was another alter within their system, Jake. While they were doing that, Layla was driving you to your home to change into different clothes.

“I had a feeling,” Layla revealed to you as the doors of the elevator closed, “About Jake’s existence.”

You pressed the button to take you to the ground floor, “How so?”

“In Cairo, Harrow’s men were shooting at me, and he was about to kill Marc. But then, something changed in him. It’s like… he wasn’t holding back anymore.” The elevator dinged and its doors opened. “He took down everyone, including Harrow. After things died down, he said he’d blacked out,” Layla stepped out of the elevator alongside you. You opened the door for the both of you and exited the complex. “I only hope the three of them figure things out.” You nodded in response.

Layla walked to a motorbike parked next to the building. She grabbed one of the black helmets and handed it to you, “Put this on, you’re gonna need it.”

The air was hitting your face as you drove through the streets, gripping Layla’s shoulders for dear life.

“How did you meet Steven, anyways?” she looked at you through the rear-view mirror.

You proceeded to explain the whole Tesco situation, how that led you to get Steven’s number and going out on a date with him.

“A date?”

“It was going well, actually. Best date I’d had in a while. That was, of course, until he got stabbed.”

She laughed, “I wouldn’t want my date to be stabbed, either.”

Her motorbike came to a halt as you got to a red light. Layla quickly glanced back at you, “You’re gonna fall off if you keep holding onto my shoulders, you know.”

You knew hugging her from behind would be more efficient, but you didn’t want to be inappropriate. “Wait, can I…?”

It was obvious what you were proposing, and Layla nodded, “Yeah, don’t worry about it.” You carefully slid your arms around Layla’s abdomen, feeling the warmth emanating from her body. “I’m happy for Steven,” she looked at you once again through the mirror, “You’re quite the catch.” You felt blood rushing to your cheeks in light of her comment. The traffic light turned green, and you were both once again on the move.

Once you arrived, you led Layla into your small flat. Signs of the hurried escape you made yesterday were evident, your suitcases still laid out on the couch.

“Sorry for the mess,” you apologized to Layla, “Last time I was here, I was in a bit of a hurry.” She shook her head and insisted you not to worry. You frantically started clearing the couch for her to have somewhere to sit, “Would you like some water, tea?” you asked, not wanting to be impolite in front of your guest.

“(y/n), I appreciate it, but we have to be quick.” That stopped you dead on your tracks. Right, you weren’t there to clean up. Her words stung, but you knew she wasn’t coming from a place of malice. You apologized and hurried back to your room.

You opened your closet and got to work. After a while, you managed to combine some old clothes you hadn’t worn in years along with dirty clothes in order to make an outfit that would fit ‘Sunny’. You exited your room and saw Layla examining the shelf behind the armchair, fixated on a particular picture frame you knew all too well. She noticed you out of the corner of her eye and jumped, excusing herself for prying. “It’s ok! I’m sorry for startling you,” you told her, trying to soothe her worries.

You looked at the picture as well. It was a family photo, a much younger version of your parents holding your baby self. You remembered the many lonely nights you’d clutched the frame tightly to your chest, crying your eyes out, hoping that maybe your parents would someday return.

“I lost them to the Snap,” you stood next to Layla, “That day, after seeing many of my co-workers disappearing into thin air, I called them to see if they were okay. When they didn’t answer…”. You felt your heart sink into your chest as you said the last sentence, yet you couldn’t quite put your pain into words. The hole you felt in your heart when your calls went unanswered. Opening the door of your childhood door to be greeted to the heart-breaking silence. You knew it was over, that they were back, but the gaping wound that remained open five years was only beginning to heal. A tear ran through your cheek, “I kept it to remind myself that they would’ve liked me to go on with my life.” You were thankful you had stuck with that philosophy, otherwise you would’ve never moved to London.

You could sense grief in Layla’s honey eyes, as if she empathized with your feelings, but couldn’t quite vocalize her sorrow. Nevertheless, she eyed you from head to toe and reached for your forearm, “Looking good, Sunny,” she smiled and headed to the door, “Let’s go.”

You were a few blocks from where the neighbourhood started, standing next to Layla’s motorbike while she was on a call with Marc. She hung up and made her way to you.

“Marc and Steven are on their way,” she grabbed a flip phone from her pocket, “If you get in trouble, call us or text us. This phone has both of our numbers” she handed you the phone and you took it from her hand.

“What about my phone?” you thought it would be easier to add her number to your phone and take it with you.

“They might try to take it away, it’s better if you use this one” She offered to keep your phone in the meantime. “Be careful. They are armed and dangerous. Never let your guard down.” Her warning gave you chills. Were these guys really that bad?

After walking a few blocks more, you arrived at the place, expecting to see everyone dressed in the same attire, maybe people sitting in a circle, chanting something in an unknown language around a fireplace and whatnot. Instead, you were met by some kids playing football on the streets, neighbours chatting in the stairs of their apartments and tending to the small community garden out on the street. By all means, this seemed to be a pleasant place to be at, not quite the cult-like environment you’d expected. Regardless of everyone acting normal, you stuck out like a sore thumb as you walked through the street. You seemed to have caught the attention of many of the people there, staring at you like as if you were carrying a grenade in your pocket. Despite this, a young lady appeared to have pitied you, approaching you tenderly.

“Can we help you?” she examined your face, “You seem… lost.”

You took this as an opportunity to begin playing the role of the lost lamb. “I am,” you nodded, “I… I need help.”

“That’s alright, love,” she stroked your back, “Come with me, I know someone who can help you,” she beckoned. You felt guilty for abusing the woman’s generosity, but you kept telling yourself it was for the greater good.

She ushered you down the street and asked you your name. You replied with your fake name, not wanting to give away your real identity. She nodded and walked towards a small pen where a man was tending to goats. “Marvin, do you happen to know where Bobbi is?” she patted your back, “Our friend Sunny here needs help.”

“Lynn!” the big man greeted the woman, “Yeah, she’s in the diner, I believe,” he said as he scratched the goat’s head. She thanked him and led you to a few steps further to a large brick building.

When you entered, you could spot a communal diner, more potted vegetables, and an area with a makeshift cinema. With her hand still on your back, she walked you to a tiny gathering of people. You were able to make out a bit of the conversation they were having “… need to find a way to get our hands on that Stela. Also, make sure to keep sending money to Chicago. We need to make sure that maniac doesn’t get to—”

“Bobbi!”, Lynn called out. “I believe we could use some help,” she squeezed your arm, “right?”

Bobbi gave some orders to the individuals she was talking to and they scattered. She walked towards you, reading your every move. “Don’t be scared,” she beckoned you towards a table, “Let us talk.”

You both sat across each other, Simple Twist of Fate playing faintly through some speakers. “Tell me, what’s your name?” she crossed her hands on the table.

“Sunny.”

“And what brough you to us, Sunny?”

You tried sounding as miserable as possible, “I… feel lost. Ever since the blip, really.” You continued telling your pre-made sob story, trying to channel some of the very real feelings you’d felt, hoping it would make your story more believable.

Bobbi listened carefully to your every word, clueless to the fact you were lying. “It’s still baffling I lost five years of my life.” You tilted your head, facing the plastic tablecloth of the table you were fidgeting with.

“You won’t have to worry about material things anymore, Sunny. We have clothes, warm food and a place for you to sleep,” Bobbi stood up from the table, encouraging you to do the same, “Just one thing, before I show you around, Can I hold your hands?” she held out her palms so they faced upwards. The tattoo of the crocodile scales on her forearm was now visible, tormenting you. You reluctantly agreed, placing your hands inside of hers. She held them tightly and you saw the tattoo begin to move. Panicked, you tried pulling away, but Bobbi made sure to keep you in place, “Shh, it won’t take long, I promise.”

The tattoo finally stopped moving, turning green and returning to its original state. Despite you thinking this was something good, Bobbi looked wearily at you. “Why don't you come with me?.” You had a bad feeling about following her, provoking you to quickly send a ‘SOS’ text with the flip phone. You walked through a set of wooden stairs and arrived to a storage room worthy of a horror movie. It was full of what you hoped were mannequins wrapped in cloth and plastic, but knew deep down were most likely dead bodies. A man pinned you to a wall and started emptying out your pockets, including the phone Layla gave you. He then pushed you into the floor, and the doors slammed shut behind you, leaving you to your own devices. “Enjoy your stay, ‘Sunny’.” Bobbi mocked you through the door, and you could hear the sarcasm in her voice when she mentioned your made-up name. How had she found out, though?

“No, no, no, wait!!” you began banging your hands on the wooden door, hoping someone would be able to hear you. You leaned into the door and heard Bobbi giving instructions to the people outside the door. “… with Khonshu’s avatar. Whatever happens, make sure they stay there. Station people outside that window as well. You two, come with me. We need to find Khonshu and Taweret’s avatars.”

You were at least glad you’d managed to warn Layla before they took the phone away.

You began scanning your surroundings, tying to find an exit in case neither of them arrived. The giant window was sealed of by wooden planks, and the stairs that lead to the terrace were far too high for you to reach. You came to the scary conclusion that the only way out would be through that door, otherwise, you were trapped there for good. The ambience of the desolate and eerie room started making your anxiety flare up; you could only wish they were already on their way.

Every minute gone by felt like an eternity, awaiting any sign of their arrival. You were sat in a fetal position, your head between your legs. You were beginning to feel lightheaded, your breathing increasing in pace, when suddenly sounds of a fight on the outside became evident. Then, BAM! The door flung open, the masked figure with the formal white suit coming right through it and greeted you with a “Hello there.”

“Steven!” at this point, you could’ve easily recognized his voice, even if it was miles away.

He ran to you and offered his hand to help you up, “Let’s get you out of here, shall we?” Two men entered into the room and stormed at you. Steven kicked one of them in the chest, and he knocked the other one throwing his baton at his face as you watched from a safe distance. He then went to the door and locked it from the inside.

“How are we going to get out of here?” you turned to him.

He eyed the sealed window and looked at you. “I think I’ve got an idea.”

Steven began ripping the wooden planks off the window, grunting as he did, leaving the glassless window exposed. “Marc?”

Almost as soon as Steven asked for Marc, the suit vanished and turned into the mummy-like costume.

“On it,” Marc exits through the broken window, gesturing you to do the same. You do so and stand on the window ledge next to him. He grabs you by the waist, positioning himself to jump off the edge. “Hold on tight.”

“What?!” Before you get an answer, he leaps down the building, with you hugging him as tightly as you can.

Harrow’s people notice your landing immediately and start shooting. Marc shields you with his cape. He finally pulls away and throws one of his moon-shaped darts into one of the man’s chest, charging and punching the other one.

“Come on, let’s go!” he turns around and grabs you by the arm, running off with him. You made your way down one street, only to find it barricaded by men with guns. “Over here!” Marc shouted as he dragged you down the other street, except there were more people. You were surrounded from both sides.

You thought that would be the end of you, until a pair of golden wings pierced through one side of the armed crowd.

“This side is clear!” Layla yelled as the bullets bounced off her wings. The three of you headed that way. You could feel your heart leaping out of your chest as you ran. The rest of the mob was catching up with you, though. You grabbed a crowbar laying on the street to defend yourself. As the swarm of angry fanatics got nearer, Layla looked at Marc. “Right?”

“Left.”

Soon enough, both of them began taking down the group of people, Marc occasionally switching to Steven and vice versa.

Someone charged at you, and out of instinct, you fiercely struck them in the head with the crowbar. You paused to look at what you had just done. The man laid there, unconscious.

BANG!

You began feeling an intense burning on your thigh, the pain so intense you fell against a wall. You’d never felt anything like that in your entire life. The stinging sensation didn’t cease even when you pressed your hand against the source of pain. Your eyes grew wide as you freed your grip from your thigh, your palm now covered in crimson red. Layla swiftly ran to your aid.

“Leave me here! You two go!” you cried out to her.

She instantly shook her head, “What?! Not a chance!” and dragged you to a corner. Marc seemed to have noticed her since he followed the two of you.

As soon as Marc spots you and Layla on the ground, something seemed to have snapped inside of him, as if the gravity of the situation was dawning on him. He throws his head back and, once again, his costume switches to the version you were very familiar with. Jake's costume. A cult member tries to ambush him from the back, but he throws him on the ground and immediately slices his throat, blood gushing all over his costume.

Layla shares the same dumbfound look in her eyes as she sees Jake hurries towards you. He lifts you off the floor bridal-style, and asks Layla, “Where’s your bike?”

“We’re almost there.”

He adjusts you in his arms, and both of them start sprinting out to the street. Fortunately, Layla’s motorbike was close enough. You were hastily sandwiched between Layla and Jake, with Layla at the wheel. You dashed through the streets as you held onto Layla with one arm, you other hand preoccupied with your wounded leg. You began feeling a cold spot where the breeze was hitting your blood-ridden trousers.

After some time of going through twists and turns all over the place in what you assumed to be an attempt to lose anyone following you, you deicded to speak up.

“We’re going to the hospital, right?” you asked Layla, the pain from your leg refusing to die down.

“We can’t. Harrow has people all over the place,” Jake interjected, “Imagine this, you're hooked up to an IV. One of Harrow’s followers cranks up the morphine and boom, you’re a goner. Let’s just get back to Stevie’s place and I’ll patch you up. You’ll be good as new on Friday; you have my word.”

He could be right, but you didn’t want to die from an infected bullet wound, “Thank you, but no thank you. Please take us to a hospital, Layla”

“Don’t! This whole plan’s going to shit if you get killed,” he yelled.

“I won’t! I’ll notice if they mess with my dosage!”

“Oh really? What are you now, a doctor?” he teased.

“No, but I’d rather be treated by a professional, not Mr. Mercenary over here.”

Jake scoffed, “Now that’s real nice of you. Remind me who dealt with the guy that mugged you on Sunday? That’s right, Mr. Mercenary himself! Now Layla, would you be so kind as to—?”

“Will the two of you just shut up?!” the motorbike brusquely stopped on the side of the street next to an apartment complex. She stood up and made her costume disappear, whipping out a set of keys from her pockets. “We’re staying here for the night. I have things to treat that wound upstairs.”

You both stayed silent from the shock for a moment. Layla unlocked the main entrance of the building, “Are you two coming or what?” she shouted from the door.

“Yup, sorry,” you muttered

“Sí, señora,” Jake replied soon after, “O bueno, más bien señorita,” he said under his breath

He made his costume vanish and carried you once more bridal style through the entrance. After an uncomfortable elevator ride, you finally made it inside Layla’s apartment. Jake waited for Layla to place a towel underneath the leather couch. After she did, he carefully laid you down. He took off his jacket and threw it on the other couch.

“I’ll get the med kit,” Layla announced.

Jake followed suit, “Yeah, I’ll go wash my hands.”

You took this moment alone to scan your surroundings to distract you from the pain. Unlike Steven’s place, Layla’s home was all tidied up, although it still carried the maximalist aesthetic, having many trinkets and books placed neatly on shelves and bookcases. On the sideboard near the entrance, you spotted a framed polaroid picture of who you supposed to be a younger Layla besides a man you assumed was her father, with some sort of archaeological site behind them. Perhaps that’s why she was drawn to the family photo you had on your bookshelf. Next to it was another picture. This time, it was Layla with a flowy, white dress, holding a bouquet, and the person next to her wearing a tuxedo was… Steven?

Layla appeared from the kitchen with a box and a glass of water, her hair now tied up. “Sorry I couldn’t take you up on that water back at your place,” she handed the glass to you, “It would’ve been nice to simply sit there and chat,” she placed some pills on your other hand and muttered, “This should help with the pain.”

You took the pills and watched Layla as she knelt on the ground to lay out the contents of the med kit on the coffee table. The photo of Steven and Layla kept nagging your conscience, so you decided to do something about it. “I know it’s none of my business but…” it was sort of your business, since Steven did agree to go on a date with you, and if he was married, it meant he had either cheated on her, or they just had open relationship, “A-Are you and Steven… married?” you couldn’t help but stumble on your words.

She diverted her focus from placing things on the table onto you, smiling and shaking her head, “No, I was married to Marc,” she stood up, “And we officially ended it about a week ago. Although we had been separated for a few months now.”

She went on to seat next to you on the couch . “We realized we needed time alone to figure things out.”

Before you could reply, Jake came bursting out from the bathroom. “Alright, let’s get this over with.”

He knelt next to you and inspected the wound. “Luck seems to be on your side today.” you would argue otherwise, but at the very least that meant he had good news, “The bullet doesn’t seem to have hit any arteries, it’s mostly superficial.” He sprayed you with lidocaine, “Let’s fish this little bastard out.”

Layla offered her hand for you to squeeze, but you refused, not wanting to hurt her. “The lidocaine won’t do much,” she insisted, “Wanna see who’s stronger?”

You acceded to her proposal, unsure as to what she was referring to, and began squeezing as soon as Jake started the recovery efforts. To counteract you crushing her hand, Layla, tried to squeeze as the same amount of force you were. That’s what she meant by finding out who was stronger.

“In the meantime, tell me: did you find anything?” she asked. You had almost forgotten the reason you’d gotten shot in the first place.

“I did,” you managed to say through gritted teeth, “They said something about getting their hands on a Stela.”

“Did they specify what Stela?” Layla inquired. You shook your head.

“They also said something about sending money to Chicago to— Ouch!” you angrily turned to face Jake.

“Can’t you speak without moving so much?” he argued for himself.

You carried on, “To keep some maniac away from someone.”

Layla concluded, “That’s probably where Harrow is.”

After a while of doing who knows what, Jake, at last, recovered the bullet from your thigh with a proclamation of victory. “Congratulations!” he announced as if he was talking about a new-born baby, “It’s a bullet. And his name will be… Carlos!” You couldn’t help but giggle at his silly comment.

After Jake stitched and bandaged you up, Layla excused herself to her bedroom. Even though she’d offered her bed to you, you had declined. It’s not like you could’ve moved much, anyways.

Jake, on the other hand, had occupied the spot next to you on the couch once you were sitting. He sprawled out his limbs and closed his eyes. For a while, you thought he was asleep. That was until you heard the faintest ‘I’m sorry’ escaping his lips.

"I'm sorry for earlier," he paused, "And for threatening you yesterday". Jake didn’t look like the kind of guy to be very open and vulnerable about his feelings, which made his apology appear even more sincere.

He most likely wasn’t expecting you to hear him because of the look he gave you when you replied, “It’s okay,” he straightened his position on the couch, scooting closer to you. It seemed he doubted what you were saying.

“Besides, you’ve saved my arse twice now,” you smiled and moved closer to him as well.

You hadn’t noticed how little space had been left between the both of you; you could practically feel his breath on your face, hear his quickened heartbeat. Warmth and desire were radiating off you both, it was only a matter of either of you closing that gap with a kiss.

You could imagine every ounce of him pressed against your body, every strand of hair on his head brushing softly against your forehead, his lips pressed up against yours.

It would be easy, really, just to close the gap, easy to give in.

The dream like trance you were on dissipated as quickly as it had appeared when Jake stood up from the couch and headed for the door.

“Where are you going?” you mentally ask yourself if you did something wrong.

“I have a car not far from here. I’ll sleep there,” he turned off the lights, opened the door and left, not even saying goodbye.

Alone in the darkness, you couldn’t help but wonder what it would’ve felt like kissing him.

Another a/n: I'm sorry I left you guys hanging there!!! I promise a kiss will be coming soon. In the meantime, thank you so much for reading!!! Taglist: !!IMPORTANT!! The crossed out usernames are ones Tumblr wouldn't let me tag. Please check your visibility settings, since that may be the reason I can't tag you. @dont-feel-so-good-peter @stilllivindue2spite @dreamtogether2000 @simonsbluee @sunnysidesidra @harrys-tittie @n0ripeaches @soggumm @victoriacourone @beebslebobs (Btw, if you want to get removed from the taglist, feel free to dm me and I'll do it right away, no strings attached.)

#tagging is the bane of my existence #moon knight #moon knight disney+ #moon knight fanfic #moon knight fanfiction #moon knight fic #moon knight series #jake lockley #jake lockely x reader #jake lockely x you #jake lockley x you #jake lockley x reader #steven grant #steven grant x reader #steven grant x you #steven grant x y/n #steven grant x gender neutral reader #marc spector #marc spector x gender neutral reader #marc spector x reader #marc spector x you #marc spector x y/n

[amplifyme]

I'm on the "keep the miracle pregnancy" side-- but C'MON CC. You had all of S7 to lead up to his finale, admitted the whole crew/actors knew it was leading up to Requiem's twist, had Amor Fati spaceship (and possibly En Ami chip), so much time and build up you could have done aaaaaand no. You literally threw up your hands, gave us a post-humous IVF timeline that can't fit in S7, gave no explanation for Scully's pregnancy and had everyone dancing around it. 1/2

The best moments of S8 were Doggett and Skinner friend bits and MSR (of course)-- and the MSR was only as good as it got because DD had his micro-expressions and most of Empedocles was add-libbed (even in the scripts it said something along the lines of "they'll know what to do here" or "they do something in this scene.") I HATE Essence/Existence. If I feel all soft and snuggly, I'll cue up Essence's monologue, some of Mulder/Doggett, the babyshower, and SKIP to the last 5 min of Existence. 2/2

The polite person in me wants to say "sorry for the rant" but the petty side of me says "direct all annoyance at CC, he started this." And that's another thing! CC has every right to torpedo his own series; and I'm pretty hands off and will just say "that's not canon", dust my hands off, and move on. But to then turn and point the finger at fans, who were invested (and continue to be in part) in his work and blame them? Wild. ANyWaY, thanks for letting me rant~.  ;DDD 3/2

Hey, I’m always up for a good rant myself! 🤣

I’ll support your support for a miracle pregnancy, even though just the thought of it makes me break out out in hives. I’m a believer in live and let live, and the idea that there is no right or wrong way to be a fan. Having said all that...

To put it bluntly, Chris Carter shit the bed when it came to pretty much anything post-Je Souhaite. There are certain moments in what came after that I enjoy, but I can only do that if I’m able to view them as AU, something completely separate from the series I came to know and love. And it’s not just that I object to the mangled storylines and characterizations, or the blatant retconning he had to do to untangle the mess he himself created. It’s that’s so much (IMHO) of what I loved about the series and these remarkable characters wasn’t there anymore. Everything was dumbed down and simplified and painfully pedestrian. I didn’t recognize anyone anymore. Frankly, I didn’t care to.

You’re correct that CC had every right to torpedo his own series. But here’s the thing: you’ll never convince me that he will ever consider the notion that he’s the one responsible for its steep decline. I think he still believes that everything he touches is golden and he makes no mistakes. Now most of us, if we’re self-aware enough, learn from our mistakes and alter our behavior going forward to integrate those lessons learned and at least try to do better the next time. Instead of doing that, CC gave us IWTB and the My Struggle episodes in the revival. Not just one or two, but four of them, each more badly written and nonsensical than the last. And he still thinks they’re masterpieces of film making and writing. But I guess if you’ve been fed a steady diet of ego-stroking and consume only positive press over a few decades, it becomes difficult to pull your head out of your ass and take a good look around.

As an aside, I took on the challenge, this new year, to finally watch S9, none of which I’ve seen - with the exception of The Truth. I made it as far as Mulder taking a shower in his black boxers and Scully’s, “He’s gone. He’s just gone,” explanation before I bowed out. I can’t do it. I just can’t. More power to everyone out there who enjoys what came after S7. I wish I could see what y’all do, but I can’t. Neither my eyes or my heart are up for the task. 

#ask and answer #xfiles #amp rants #love the great kahuna for giving us mulder and scully #but will never forgive him for what he did to them #they deserved so much better

[xaracosmia]

ꕥ — WELCOME TO EXO COSMIA, JESSE FADEN. 🌑

ꕥ  — OOC INFORMATION;

name / alias: jan age: 26 pronouns: he/him ooc contact: bloomood @ tumblr other characters in xc: none for now

ꕥ  — IC INFORMATION;

name: jesse faden age: 28 pronouns: she/her series: control canon point: Post AWE & Foundation DLC app triggers: paranoia, gaslighting, stalking, uncanny valley (akin to media revolving around The Backrooms or unexplainable phenomena)

personality: 

This is off the record, right? Director Faden’s an amazing boss and all but I don’t want to be quoted or anything… Okay, good. 

Jesse Faden had a rough childhood. She was on her own for awhile, just a voice in her head to keep her company. Growing up, I know she felt lost and the world didn’t treat her too kindly either. Her words were often waved off, her cries for help and her desire to belong or just to find someone to listen was almost never heard. She harbored some resentment towards the world for that, but it’s not something she let consume her. 

Jesse is still very empathetic. She’s helped agents she’d only just met all around the FBC in dire straits, saved countless lives. Because she knows she has power, strength, and if she’s got it she might as well use it. She’s adaptable and takes things in stride, no matter how absolutely insane those things might be. Sometimes she can get really intense, like really intense. She’s not afraid to let people know how she feels and sometimes that comes with a sting. 

And.. between you and me, sometimes I think she’s still got those more buried habits from when she was a kid. She’s scared of being alone again, no matter how strong she might get. Scared of losing that voice in her head.

But, hey, you didn’t hear any of that from me.

something your muse struggles with: obsessing over her goals, abandonment. 

your muse’s greatest strength: adaptability. 

history / background: 

You want Director Jesse Faden’s file? Right, and I want to have dinner with Beyonce. 

What the hell is that? Full Clearance? Are you serious?

Okay… Fine. Far as I can tell that card is legitimate. Where to even begin…

Well, seeing that you’ve got a visitor’s badge AND have full clearance, I guess it’d be good to just go over some basic terms to make this whole thing a lot easier. 

OoP. That’s an Object of Power. These are items that are connected to another plane of existence called the Astral Plane. How that happens? That’s above my pay-grade, but the important part is that OoP’s can be bound to FBC (Federal Bureau of Control) agents, giving them some badass powers. Director Jesse Faden’s got a ton of them. 

AI. Altered Item. Altered items are acted on by paranatural forces during AwE’s that give them some strange and oftentimes dangerous properties. Think of a refrigerator that needs constant eye-contact from somebody, or else it starts destroying its surroundings. These things can’t be bound to agents and are just contained in the FBC containment sector.

Lastly, AwE. Altered World Event. These are breaches of reality by paranatural forces that are sometimes the cause of, or can create altered items. Think of a sinkhole so rapid and drastic that it starts pulling everything around it in straight to the Earth’s core, magma and everything. The FBC goes in, covers it all up, and returns to contain any possible altered items from the scene.

Got all that? Now, Jesse Faden. 

When Jesse was eleven, she and her brother Dylan had come into possession of an OOP. It was a Slide Projector, capable of opening pathways into other dimensions through the use of the slides that they found. They played in those dimensions, and eventually came into contact with two entities. One of these entities, which Jesse named Polaris later, communicated with them both telepathically and would become a constant in their lives, in their minds. It wasn’t all fun times though. The Faden’s had another childhood friend who was beaten up by a gang of bullies, and then interrogated to find out more about this “toy”. Those bullies stole the projector and that’s when it all started going to hell.

The gang of bullies found another slide and began getting corrupted by another entity. It turned them absolutely nuts, apparently, they even killed a teacher in their school. That’s when the police took the kids away, and Jesse and Dylan were questioned about the projector. Apparently, Jesse and Dylan’s parents were especially hard on the two kids with their questioning, and Director Faden recalled wishing they were gone. The next day, every adult in Ordinary was missing. We’re unsure if there’s a link between her and that event, but that’s what got the attention of the FBC. 

That gang of bullies? They were fully corrupted by that entity, the “Not-Mother” was the recorded name. Jesse and Dylan managed to get to the projector, but she couldn’t turn it off herself, only with help from Polaris did she manage, and she burned all the slides except for the one that Polaris was from. 

The FBC came in, covered it all up. Said it was an “Industrial Incident”. They took Dylan with them, Jesse managed to get away. 

From then on, Dylan Faden served as the “Control” Subject for the FBC’s prime candidate program. The program which would install future Director’s of the entire Bureau. Jesse on the other hand lived with a constant set of eyes on her. She was paranoid, gaslit at every turn by therapists and the news and everyone just denying everything that she grew up with. No one would believe her, it was all so outlandish, how could they even? Jesse worked odd jobs, mostly custodial, keeping to herself and living in and out of motels as she grew up and continued her search for something that the world claimed didn’t exist, in the search for her brother. At least Polaris was there for her. 

At twenty-eight, Polaris finally led Jesse to the FBC. Now the building we’re in, The Oldest House, it’s an OOP itself. It hides itself in plain sight, only revealing itself when it wants or needs to. The building’s constantly shifting, which makes it a constant work hazard mind you. But Jesse finally managed to find the place, and she quickly came to finally realize she wasn’t crazy, and all this dimensional, paranatural shit, was real. 

Jesse found the former Director of the FBC, Director Zacariah Trench, dead in his office. His OOP, the Service Weapon, a pistol to keep it simple, was there. Jesse picked it up and went through the bonding process unknowingly. Now if you pick up that thing, and the Service Weapon doesn’t deem you as a worthy candidate for the next director, you just die. It’s Russian Roulette, and that gun will kill you. Jesse survived the first trial, and on day one was granted the position of Director. The candidate process, the Director, it was all overseen by an entity called The Board. Astral Plane again, but the Board is the one that’s tied right to the Director.

And boy was it trial by fire. The Oldest House was invaded by a hostile resonance, some sort of corrupting power she called The Hiss which turned agents into mindless slaves to the extra-dimensional entity. The whole building was on lockdown until the Hiss was dealt with. Some agents survived thanks to a technology called an HRA, that was passed out by the head of Research for the FBC, Casper Darling, a bit before the breakout. 

Jesse worked with the survivors of the outbreak to try and bring order to the FBC, all in the hopes that she could find her brother Dylan. Through cleaning up the mess inside the lockdown, Jesse came to learn about all the surveillance she was under her whole life, all the cover-ups, and she learned that after that event in Ordinary with the Slide-projector AWE, she and Dylan were put into the Prime Candidate program. Dylan was PC6, Jesse was PC7. In captivity and under the Bureau’s tests, Dylan eventually went crazy. He was corrupted by the Hiss too, broke out of containment, but he wasn’t mindless like all the other agents. He told Jesse that the Hiss entered the Bureau through the Slide Projector that the Bureau kept. 

Jesse then began the search for the projector, along with Polaris’s guidance, maybe they could help her brother somehow. She learned that the former Director Trench, and Dr. Darling, used the projector to make more excursions into the other dimensions. Darling found that entity linked to Polaris, which he named Hedron, and brought it back with him. It’s Hedron’s resonance that Darling used to create the HRA’s, which protects the agents from the Hiss influence. Director Trench on the other hand, Jesse later came to learn was actually corrupted by the Hiss. Subtly, slowly, making him paranoid. He was actually the one who let the Hiss in initially, convinced that everyone else in the Bureau was against him thanks to the Hiss’s influence. 

At the same time of this realization, Dylan broke out of his containment again and stole the Slide Projector. He tried using it to enter the Astral Plane and corrupt The Board. Jesse almost gave into the Hiss entirely, but she pulled back control of her own mind along with Polaris and freed herself of that corruption. She stopped Dylan, cleansed the Slide Projector, and Dylan fell into a coma. 

Jesse shut off the Slide Projector and cut off the Hiss from entering the Dimension. Though some threats still linger within. 

And that’s our fearless Director Faden. She’s working still, getting rid of the Hiss and trying to bring her brother back. 

Hey, you’re the one who wanted the whole file.

powers / abilities: 

Director Faden’s the strongest Parautilitarian we’ve seen. Which is just a fancy word for people who can do things not “normal” in our reality. 

Launch: Through binding herself with OOPs, Jesse Faden’s been able to harness insane telekinetic powers. She can grab and launch multiple things. We’re talking boulders and stone straight from the ground or walls. Even people. The speed she can throw them is lethal with every bit of the word. That telekinetic power lets her also surround herself in whatever loose debris is around to form a shield. Defense is just as important, right?

Evade: Now this one’s cool. She can use it with her other abilities, but even just on its own it’s crazy. Jesse can propel herself in pretty much any direction in a short burst of speed, flinging herself to evade whatever might be coming her way. Like a slingshot almost. 

Kinetic Blast: Nothing flashy, but packs a hell of a punch. Jesse can release a close-range, kinetic explosion that pushes things away. If they survive the blast. 

Seize: This one’s a bit freaky. I’ve seen Director Faden hold a hand out, and channel her power right into her enemy’s minds. She can control them for a time, make them fight against their own kin and on her side. [[ OOC: Would only do this with consent or in circumstances where there’s no sort of meta-gaming going on!]]

Levitate: I know what you’re thinking. And yeah, it’s that. Director Faden can fly. Not Super-man levels, but she can go up pretty high, over a story or two, and hover there for a good while. If she jumps off a high point, I’ve seen her slow her fall as well. Come right down from the top of the Black Rock Quarry as light as a feather. 

inherent abilities: 

Polaris: This one’s a bit tricky to explain. Back when Jesse and her brother were messing with the slide projector as kids, they opened a pathway into another dimension. In that dimension were two linked entities, Hedron (Named by Casper Darling later on), and Polaris. Polaris is an extra-dimensional visitor! Just one that lives in Jesse’s brain. Jesse named this entity Polaris since she saw her as a guiding star. Since she was eleven, Polaris has been a comfort in Jesse’s mind ever since, oftentimes serving as her only friend and a companion she has constant conversations with. As far as we know, Polaris is the source of Jesse and Dylan’s parautilitarian powers.

Gun training: Whether it came from earlier in her life, or she just was a natural, Director Faden is a truly exceptional shot. And I’m not saying that just because she’s the big boss either. The Service Weapon comes with many variations, ranging from semi-automatic, handgun style shots to explosive propelled missiles. Jesse has proven she can hit her target while flying, dashing, or in any number of difficult positions while always keeping on the move in a fire fight. She’s like a wrecking ball that can fly, twist, and dive through the air. A wrecking ball with a gun.

items / weapons: 

Service Weapon: The Director’s Gun. Owning this thing makes you the Director of the FBC, as ordained by The Board which is tied to this thing. It’s an absolute beast of a weapon, taking the shape of a handgun most of the time, composed of other-wordly material. Cubes that let it shift into different configurations and manifest different projectiles, reloads over time or if Jesse is especially trigger-happy, it goes on a cooldown before it can fire again. 

Fun bit of a trivia, a lot of agents hypothesize that this thing took the shape of legendary weapons of old back in the day. Talking Excalibur, Mjolnr, whatever the worthy wielder deemed it to be. Imagine that, huh? 

The Service Weapon can be swapped out for its firing configurations on the fly. It’s got:

Grip: Similar to a revolver, semi-automatic.  Shatter: Wide-spread, buckshot style shotgun configuration.  Spin: The barrel revolves, almost like a minigun. Harder to control accuracy wise but it’s fully automatic. Pierce: A slow-firing, charge-up style that fires a single shot that is capable of piercing through architecture and enemies. All about user accuracy here.  Charge: Closest thing that can describe this is up to three, rocket-propelled grenades.  Surge: This one’s trickier. Fires grenades that stick to surfaces or enemies, and can be detonated at Jesse’s discretion.

Ahti's Walkman: An old school portable cassette player with matching wired yellow headphones. The cassette has some Finnish songs on it and one track by the Old Gods of Asgard, called Take Control

starting ability: Launch.

starting item: Service Weapon. 

extra: 

Might just be the most comfortable a character ever could be once she gets dropped into Xara Cosmia. Walked down a door in the Oldest House, blacked out, woke up here. 

She’s like a jedi with a gun. Seriously, her powers are so cool. 

A true glass-cannon of a set of abilities and skills. 

Also I love her, hope you guys do too.

I tried something new with this application style with the voice and how it’s written, just imagine you had some guy in a suit with a clipboard in a very generic looking office telling you all this information. We’ll call him Agent Bill.

And I swear one day I’ll submit an application that isn’t this long, I should be arrested for my crimes.

discord id: primecandidate7

#xc application #mun: jan #exo cosmia

[booksandwords]

Murders and Metaphors by Amanda Flower

Series: Magical Bookshop, #2 Read time: 5 Days Rating: 4/5 Stars

The Quote: I wish I could say I was surprised to see you here, but then we'd both know I'd be lying. — David Rainwater

I keep coming back to this series. Amanda Flower has created such a wonderful and endearing world with characters that you want to either get their happiness or their comeuppance or oddly in one case both (look I don't like Nathan and I make no apologies for that). I was reading this addition while I was commuting which means I was reading in a bit of a stop-start fashion. What is important to know when picking up Murders and Metaphors is that it was written in 2019 some 3 years after the previous entry, Prose and Cons. As such her style has changed, her voice for some of the characters has changed and her characterisations have altered. It feels like in 2016 some of the characters would have been less blatantly written. But for those reading them close together it can be a bit disconcerting, even if it is nice in a way to see someones evolution.

The associated text for Murders and Metaphors is Louisa May Alcott's Little Women. I feel it is a much better choice than the previous Edger Allan Poe's The Fall of the House of Usher and The Purloined Letter. Alcott's work is maybe more accessible it is certainly a classic and extremely widely read, as both a studied text in schools and as recreational reading. Lord knows how Verse and Vengance is going to work out using the works of Walt Whitman at first Leaves of Grass and maybe others. On how Little Women is used... there is the canonical interpretation of the hints given by the bookshop then there is the other one I saw. For a bit of context as much as this book is about finding out who killed Belinda and helping Lacey it is about Violet making her choice between Rainwater and Nathan. You can read the quotes as Charming Books giving her direction as to her choice. Whom it would like her to choose. Whom would expect her truths, its truths. The bookshop has an opinion and it's expressing it. Or that is another way I read it. Especially while I was trying to figure out the clues given by Little Women. Particularly when you consider Charming Books revealing its secret to Rainwater in a shocking turn of events.

Through the course of the story we meet the new members of the Red Inkers. Renee, we've met before the university librarian whom Richard is massively sweet on. The other is Simon. Simon is new to the area and writes poetry. He has a crush on Sadie. But like Renee is blind to Richard's affections Sadie is blind to Simon's. It's a theme. Because readers of the series will remember that Violet was somewhat blind to Rainwater's (or at least perceived it as one-sided). I like Renee, I always have, she is a prime example of a well-written librarian. Making me think Amanda Flower definitely knows a librarian, Renee is that on point. Simon is just so, so sweet. He and Sadie will be so good for each other.

Have a dump of comments and quotes.

At one point Violet infiltrates a meeting of the Cascade Springs Winemaker Guild kinda half unknowingly she ends up sitting next to someone who will become important. It's made clear who that person is

My black-and-white tuxedo cat, Emerson, was strangely MIA. He was usually the first on the scene when there was any promise of commotion, Emerson loved commotion, loved being in the midst of it, and he certainly loved making it. — This is such a fair description of Emerson. When he goes missing you have to start to worry. (Violet, p.4)

"You are the most determined woman I have ever met. I guess that's why I find you so fascinating." — Fascinating is a good way to describe her. He does know how to flatter a girl. (Rainwater, p.114)

"Are we all settled now?" The cat and crow stared at me expectedly. I shook my head. If my friends back in Chicago could have seen me now, looking for guidance from magical books and talking to animals, they'd have had me committed. —  What is wrong with talking to the animals Violet? They are trying to help you and they are cute. (Violet, p.163)

 "I'll be there tomorrow. I have two morning classes back to back. Both are freshman comp, and therefore, no one in either room wants to be there, including me." — I like this moment. Just that reality of no one ever really wanting to do that early morning class or shift. (Violet, p.168)

Okay. So Bunnicula... Yeah, it's a thing. And as an audiobook it's brilliant. Bunnicula was written by James and Deborah Howe. Victor Garber does the narration on the audiobook his narration is fantastic.

Violet has the sweetest confession. It made me soft.

I did not see the baddie, the killer coming in this one. Again I'm not sure the hints are truly there. Though I'm not well versed in Little Women and its themes. Just some warnings there is murder (as is the norm), attempted murder (because you know Violet) and psychological abuse. It is a great entry to the series. It has an important epilogue, setting the scene in an unexpected way. I'm looking forward to reading Verse and Vengance.

#amanda flower #magical bookshop #murders and metaphors #louisa may alcott #book review #read 2022 #cozy mystery #ktreviews #booklr

[raksh-writes]

I will do some rewrites, I said.

Just some light rewrites, nothing more, I said.

And here I am now - edited more than half of the chapter and wrote in almost 1k of added material for the scene I needed to rewrite. I just... I really can't control myself, can I.

#Raksh's writing ramblings #LitA ramblings #I was supposed to leave this for later #and it was supposed to be shorter #but I started it and then had to finish it up #god dang it #lets hope I didnt just fuck up my wrists again #I did a lot of stretches today and what not so maybe it wont be too bad xd #tho I have to say - being able to write again? fucking FANTASTIC feeling #I missed it so much ;_; #but I still need to be careful cause I dunno how it will affect my wrists ughhh #we'll see tomorrow I guess #I leave the rewrites for the rest of the chapter for some other day #maybe even for the final edits cause its all pretty much good to go #I just needed this one thing rewritten #and its also chap 16 if anyones curious ^^ #another canon scene altered - can you guess which one? ;> #anyway I'm not touching my keyboard again today lmao #at least not for more than a few words hah #prob gonna wear braces for the rest of the evening too #only bad thing about I wanted to play some Skyrim but I prob shouldnt now to not strain my wrists even further #oh well I was supposed to do some reading anyway

[thebibliosphere]

Why did you write two versions of Hunger Pangs?

What’s the difference and is one more “valid” than the other?

I get a lot of questions when people find out I wrote two versions of Hunger Pangs (Phangs). To answer that second question first, the only difference is that one contains explicit sexual content, and the other merely alludes to it.

The Flirting with Fangs edition (red cover) contains multiple scenes that depict sexual acts, either solo or partnered. (link)

The Fluff and Fangs edition (blue cover) is less explicit. I say less because while the scene(s) fade to black, some elements of physical affection are still shown, along with a fairly involved conversation about consent and kink. This is in the latter half of Chapter 28, and as noted on my website, you can skip this part if it makes you uncomfortable and not miss anything important to either the plot or character development. (link)

Both versions contain heat ratings and content warnings on my website. I can’t put it in/on the books themselves because Amazon is going after authors for mentioning content warnings (link), so when in doubt, check www.joydemorra.com or send me a message!

And no, one version is not more “valid” than the other. Both are canon. If it helps, think of them as parallel universes running side by side down the narrative timeline. The plot and character development remain the same; the scenes have just been altered to accommodate reader preference. 

Then why do this at all?

As stated above, I wrote two different versions primarily to accommodate reader preference. When I first started writing Hunger Pangs: TLB, I was widely known on Tumblr for being “that erotica editor.” (link) I used to be a ghostwriter for my publishing house, too, so chances are some of you have already read my work under another author’s name*. A large chunk of my professional life has been spent writing sexually explicit content. It’s what I was then known and popular for, so it never occurred to me that anyone who was sex averse or didn’t enjoy reading about sex would be interested in my work.

And then those exact people started messaging me to let me know they were super excited about my work, couldn’t wait to buy a copy and would just skip past the sex parts that made them uncomfortable.

And that didn’t sit right with me. 

Phangs is a bit of a weird project. It was started via a Tumblr shitpost (link) and grew from there. It was funded entirely by the support of my Patreon, which people kept supporting even after it took me years longer to finish it than initially planned because my health took a proverbial nose dive into the tenth circle of hell. It is not an exaggeration to say my Patreon and Tumblr kept me alive during that time. You kept our lights on and put what little food I could eat into my fridge. You supported me both physically and emotionally during one of the worst times of my life. And during that time, I wrote the entire Phangs series, assuming it would be edited and published posthumously**. It was both my swan song and a parting gift. A means of saying thank you for all your support over the years and the fervent hope you’d feel my love on every page. Because never doubt this, I wrote Phangs for you. Phangs is a love letter to fandom from start to finish. It’s written specifically to appeal to fandom and all the things we love about it.

So when people told me they were going to buy it but skip parts of it, I felt the need to make sure they were getting equal amounts of content for their money. So the “fluff” version of the narrative was born, replacing the sex-based scenes with more emotional and “fluffy” but still intimate interactions that keep the character arcs and plot intact.

For the first book, I tried to keep the scenes as similar in theme as possible. That’s why Chapter 28 still features a frank discussion around kink and consent, as a large part of Vlad’s character arc is learning that his wants and desires matter, but more importantly, so do his boundaries. But I also purposefully wrote it so that you can skip away after that conversation and not miss anything in the lead-up to the fade to black/implied sex scene. As the series progresses, the scenes may differ more as I play around having fun with it. But the fact remains that the characterization and plot will always stay true.

It’s merely about what kind of reading experience you want.

Do I expect other authors to do this? Absolutely not. This is a labor of love. The “fluff” version being popular is merely a bonus that enables me to keep writing. So thank you. I’m off to keep working on the next story.

 *Before anyone asks, no, I can’t tell you who. I signed NDAs that are still in effect.

**Jokes on me, I guess because I lived, and now I have to edit and rewrite all 500-f*cking-k of it. 

#Hunger Pangs: True Love Bites #Hunger Pangs Series #Phangs Universe #Hunger Pangs asks #FAQ: links

[arctimon]

What If...? (Big Hero 6 Edition)

So the next Marvel series set to release is What If...?, a series of nine episodes that will focus on alternate events and timelines that occur within the Marvel Cinematic Universe.  The series, based off of the comic series of the same name, will premiere on August 11th, running straight through October 6th. The show was suppose to have ten episodes in both Season 1 and 2 (which is already being worked on), but producer Brad Winderbaum mentions in an interview that they had to push an episode back because of, you guessed it, the pandemic:

"We had to push an episode into Season 2. It was just, honestly, like everything else, that was a COVID impact," Winderbaum told Collider. "There was an episode that just wouldn't hit the completion date, but luckily we do get to see it in the second season of the show."

Judging by both the poster and the trailer, we know of a few scenarios: Peggy Carter becoming Captain America, an alternate Avengers lineup battling at New York, Black Panther as Star Lord, Marvel Zombies (of course there’s zombies), and Spider-Man as the Sorcerer Supreme.  Inverse has an article breaking all of the possibilities down.

A lot of the actors who portray their characters in live action will reprise their roles for the animated series, including the late Chadwick Boseman as Black Panther/Star Lord.  Star...Panther?  Black Lord? That last one sounds wrong. Among those not coming back are Robert Downey Jr. as Iron Man, Chris Evans as Steve Rogers, and Dave Bautista as Drax.  Bautista was, according to the man himself, wasn’t even asked to come back to voice Drax.  Others include Brie Larson as Carol Danvers, Tom Holland as Spider-Man, James Spader as Ultron, Zoe Saldana as Gamora, Elizabeth Olson as the Scarlet Witch, Letitia Wright as Shuri, Gweneth Paltrow as Pepper Potts, and various members of the Dora Milaje.  They have all apparently been confirmed to be appearing in What If...? in some form or another, but voiced by different people.

It will certainly be an interesting show, but I hope you can see where I’m going with this.

The Big Hero 6 fanbase has a lot of burning questions for the show and movie, and it’s not all just unanswered ones about what happens after the show ended.  I think collectively there are a few common “what-ifs” that we have in our minds about the team.  I think the most obvious one involves one of the Hamada brothers, and that branches off into other what-ifs as well.

Granted, not all of these are reality-altering hypotheticals like there are in the show or comics, but they can still change the course of the movie or show in a huge way.

1.) What if...Tadashi had survived the fire?

Tadashi being a survivor of the fire that takes down the exhibition hall brings up a few interesting conundrums.  Would he be scarred for life?  Would he even be able to complete school?

And if Hiro still made the team, would he end up becoming Sunfire like a lot of fans theorize?

The thing is that Callaghan knows that Tadashi died in the fire.  If he knew that he didn’t, would that change his motivations?  Would he still be using the Microbots knowing that the person that was trying to “stop” him was still alive? Alternatively, you also have...

2.) What if...Hiro had died instead of Tadashi?

Hiro was probably about two seconds away from being fully engulfed in that giant fireball.  It’s entirely plausible that he (or possibly both Hamadas) could have perished in the fire instead of his brother, which sort of leads to the same circumstances as the first question, just with different powersets.  Tadashi would no longer be tied to fire-based powers but the magnetic equipment that that Hiro currently uses.

But one has to think about whether Tadashi would be in the right state of mind to be a hero long term.  Seeing his kid brother perish in the accident would probably cause him to go insane, and perhaps the rest of the team would have to reel him in.

3.) What if...Baymax had killed Callaghan?

It’s worth noting that if Honey Lemon had been about three seconds later on getting the healthcare chip back into Baymax, this wouldn’t have been a “What If?” question.

And sure, the team would have saved the day, but at what cost?  The permanent scarring of a fourteen-year-old?  And what would have come of the major revelations after that fight concerning Project Silent Sparrow and Abigail?

Maybe they would have been the ones to build the portal to the other dimension to try to save her.  That would similar to what happened in the original manga (where Tadashi actually helps with the construction of the original portal and got sucked in as a result). 4.) What if...Baymax had saved Obake in “Countdown to Catastrophe”?

Obake dismissed Baymax after his hideout started collapsing near the end of Part 2, and you could tell that Baymax was seriously considering rescuing him before leaving him in his chair amongst the rubble.  Ultimately, however, he did leave him behind after Obake’s insistence.

Imagine what would have happened if he had gone against his programming and saved his life.

The relieved group hug on the beach would have been replaced with a disheveled (and probably a little damp) Obake.  Hiro would have been staring hiim down in disbelief.  Perhaps there would even be another fight, or at least the makings of one.

And then Obake would give himself up for arrest.

Maybe that’s where Chief Cruz could have been introduced.  It would have given a good lead into the next season, and it would give Megan’s meeting with Hiro in Season 2 a little bit more meaning.

And finally, because I’m a shipper and we have to go there:

5.) What if...Karmi had never left SFIT at the end of “City of Monsters”?

We know from the boards that Bob Schooley posted that “City of Monsters” was originally going to end very differently than what actually made the final cut.  It seemed that Karmi, in addition to getting a nonsensical boyfriend named “Flammarion”, was not suppose to leave SFIT in the early draft.

So what if Hiro had shown up to her lab, and instead of seeing this...

He saw this?

Or...something a little less dramatic?  Maybe just her packing up stuff because she’s in the process of leaving?  And Hiro had to say something in order for her to stop what she was doing? And how exactly would you achieve that? See, if that scenario happened, I think that this particular point would be where Hiro told her about being in Big Hero 6.  And of course Karmi wouldn’t believe him, even though she’s now in love with him crushing on him.

Then, he takes her to the base.

And she turns back to him with an incredulous look.

And roll credits.  What a cliffhanger to go into Season 3 with. I vaguely remember fanart depicting that exact scene (Hiro taking Karmi to the base), but I don’t remember who did it.  I would like to give them the proper credit. Season 3 would have looked totally different if that took place.  Maybe it would have been an actual season and not a bunch of mini stories.  Also...perhaps Karmi would have joined the team proper.

And maybe we would have finally had a giant canonical Karmiro moment.

...Now that is a big “What if?”.

(Marvel’s What If...? premieres on Wednesday, August 11th on Disney+.)

#big hero 6 #big hero 6 the series #big hero 6 season 3 #hiro hamada #tadashi hamada #big hero 6 movie #karmi #karmiro #marvel's what if #obake #liv amara #countdown to catastrophe #city of monsters #baymax #yokai #professor callaghan

[lovebecomeshim]

hello! your zutara posting today has finally motivated me to ask this question because I came to atla very late(last year, to be specific) and I Love It Very Much but am 1000% out of the loop as far as why what remains of fandom (at least that I've seen among my friends) is so very strongly zutara. I'm not opposed to it per se I just don't really know what has driven it to apparently be such a popular ship? can you help me understand and maybe convert me a little bit?

Hey!! Your ICON! :D I can try but I’m not sure how coherent I’ll be; however I AM sure someone a lot more competent will be willing to add to this. Either way, I’m glad you asked because my plan was to drag down as many people as possible with me.

*smacks the hood of zutara* this baby can fit so much mutual love and support!

This got so long, I’m so sorry. I don’t know how to put it under a cut on mobile and it already got deleted once so I’m scared to mess with it lol. Moving on.

I’m gonna start this with a disclaimer that im on mobile so formatting is tricky and I’m also really new to atla in that I only completed my first watch through in like 2019??? So some of my info is all just based on what I’ve picked up from Discourse 👀 so anyway the sparknotes version: zutara was wildly popular from the beginning. To the point where the atla crew internally disagreed on which ship should be endgame. (Ex. Bryke [showrunners] asked the writers to rewrite The Southern Raiders to make Zuko seem less ideal for Katara than Aang [which failed, depending on who you ask]; the animation team purposefully created a visual parrallel between Oma and Shu in the Cave of Two Lovers and Zuko and Katara in the catacombs under Ba Sing Se in the Crossroads of Destiny; etc.)

The ship was popular enough that Bryke actually chose to display zk fanart at a con for the sole purpose of mocking the fans, but that’s neither here nor there. The entire episode Ember Island Players, while a love letter to/parody of the whole show, was an opportunity to address zutara’s viability as a canon pairing (while, again, mocking zutaras for romanticizing that catacombs scene). Point is! It’s always been popular but with it not being endgame, there’s got to be something that’s given it staying power.

And that’s honestly got to do with three things: their dynamic, thematic cohesion, and potential.

(You know what... you know what, it’s four things. The fourth is they’re so aesthetically pleasing together and individually. Like, they’re just good looking people [specifically when they’re grown but they’re also cute kids] and that absolutely doesn’t hurt) (but it’s not the Point, it’s just nice to point out sometimes)

The dynamic is hard to get into without also looking at the canon pairings, but I think I can do that without unnecessary bashing. It’s just that part of the magic of zutara is really highlighted by what they give to each other that their other relationships don’t.

First off, it’s classic enemies to (would be) lovers. The absolute truest form of it. It’s not too different from how CS started out: a rogue antagonist with a job to do—but no personal vendetta against the future love interest—who is deeply and emotionally invested in his personal storyline (revenge/redemption) with little regard for how it effects other people after his entire life and genuine good nature are marred by suffering, and a fierce warrior girl with a strong moral compass and her own personal investment in stopping him (protect her family and save the world doing it). Obviously frustration and animosity grew between them by the nature of them being on opposing sides, but that just lends itself to the sweetness of their later reconciliation.

The thing is that while they’re wildly different on the surface (he’s a hot-headed prince of a fascist regime who is trying to capture the Avatar to please his father; she’s a nurturing daughter of the chief who is trying to protect and train the Avatar in order to topple his father’s throne) they find out that they have so much more in common both in their experiences and their personalities.

(What follows is an excessive use of the word “both” and I’m sorry about that)(I can edit it. I can do that. That IS an option............)

They both have an innate sense of justice that they are determined to see done (zuko, at the war meeting, sticking up for the Earth Kingdom kid when the guards torment his family, choosing not to steal from the pregnant couple despite his circumstances, abiding by his word to leave the SWT should Aang come willingly, etc.; katara, literally.... at any point). They both have pretty one-track minds at accomplishing certain goals once they’ve put their mind to it, regardless of a lack of support in that endeavor (it goes without saying I guess, but zuko’s entire hunt; katara’s determination to get the earth benders to fight back, her determination to absolutely destroy Pakku until he agrees to teach her, etc.). They both lost their mothers at young ages. Their worlds are war-torn and traumatizing to them both, if in different ways, but that ultimately forces them to grow up too quickly to be wholly independent individuals. They both have issues with their fathers (for WILDLY different reasons, but). They both hold extreme prejudices that they need to learn to overcome (which ties into thematic cohesion)(bit like Lizzie and Darcy in that way but magnified by a million). They’re both extremely emotional and empathetic—which can and often does result in loud outbursts. Katara’s a bit better adjusted and can temper her anger for longer than S1 Zuko can, but they both feel that anger deeply and have no compunctions expressing it (Katara is, usually, more justified, particularly in S1. Again, S1 Zuko is severely maladjusted but at the point when they could’ve feasibly become a couple, he’s so much better off with the way he carries himself). They both struggle with feelings of inferiority in their bending abilities when confronted with prodigal benders like Aang and Azula, but have the work ethic required to double down and become two of the most powerful benders in the three remaining nations. This is a little more minor but it is a parrallel that appeals to some shippers that they both have these alter egos in the Painted Lady (notably fire nation coded) and the Blue Spirit (water tribe coded) that are pretty different from who they are day-to-day and are useful in accomplishing a purpose that they as themselves cannot.

(I’m.... I just realized that this could potentially get very long. Should I have made a slide show with bullet points??????)

Anyway, similar. I know there’s more but there’s literally so much to love about zutara that I’ll drive myself a little crazy trying to compile all the ways they’re similar. (Just gonna say that at this exact moment I went back to add more similarities.... so okay then)

Once they’ve reconciled, we see how all of these things only lend themselves to a deeper intimacy together than they share with literally anyone else. There’s a steady partnership that positions them as the mom/dad of the gaang, while also providing the support necessary to allow the other to not have to carry so much responsibility. A lot of zutaras will point out how zuko is actually depicted doing the more domestic chores that are normally relegated to Katara once he joins the gaang, since the others in the group are two 12-year-olds and sokka. The one that sticks out the most is how he makes tea for the group and then serves them, while Katara is able to just relax with her friends around the fire. Fanon expands upon this a lot to Zuko helping with the laundry or the cooking or whatever else needs doing since he, as a once-refugee, is used to doing his own domestic tasks. Before Zuko joined, Katara was the one mothering everyone, sewing for them, cooking for them, etc. She’s always tending to the needs of the group, and that includes emotionally. She does the emotional labor for the gaang 99% of the time, but when she’s the one falling apart, she’s usually doing it alone and without the comfort that she normally provides for others. Until Zuko. And that’s before they’re even friends.

Which is WHY people romanticize the catacombs of Ba Sing Se so much. Katara is verbally attacking Zuko out of her own righteous anger but also her own prejudice when Zuko, surprisingly, chooses to be vulnerable with her. He’s been on a journey that’s opened his eyes a bit, but he’s never actively chosen to expose the rawest parts of his past to anyone. But for some reason he chooses to do that with Katara of all people. While she’s yelling at him. He sees her humanity, and for once can look past his prejudice and empathize with her. And this time, when she breaks down, she gets to be comforted. Katara normally talks about her mother when she’s trying to explain to someone else that she sees and understands they’re pain, as a form of comfort to them. Here, Zuko uses the exact same tactic. He sees her and he understands. And for zuko? He’s not being shut down. He’s allowed to articulate his pain regarding his mother without being ignored and made to internalize it, and he’s allowed to process how he feels about his scar out loud without being told that he deserved it. And then he lets her touch his scar, something we’ve seen him actively avoid before. He’s completely open to her and she’s completely open to him and all it took was one five minute conversation. She was about to use the little bit of Spirit water that she had, that she was saving for something Important, to heal the scar that still daily causes him pain just because they had, somehow, connected.

Plus there’s the whole parallel to the star-crossed lovers forbidden from one another, a war divides their people—

And then zuko messes up, he regresses, he gets what he wants and he HATES it. And the sense of justice he had as a child has been restored to him against his will and he can’t think of anything he wants to do more than the Right Thing, so he joins team avatar. Before he does that though, we get to see his relationship with Mai, which is where comparison really comes in. And what we see is Zuko, fresh off of his encounter with Katara in the catacombs, trying to be emotionally honest with Mai... and getting shut down and dismissed. Which is just how Mai is and it’s fine, but not for Zuko. Still, he keeps trying, and he keeps getting ignored or scoffed at or yelled at. Which is really a larger symbol for how he doesn’t fit in his old life anymore, but again that’s about thematic cohesion. He tries to articulate his anxieties about returning home, he tries to make romantic gestures, he tries to explain how morally conflicted he’s feeling—and Mai diverts to some kind of physical affection to shut him up and a parting comment that is pretty much always, in essence, “I don’t wanna talk about this.” So they don’t. On the other hand, once zuko and Katara are friends, we see him again emotionally distraught and caught up in his anxieties about facing Iroh, and it’s Katara who comes to him and listens to him and comforts and encourages him.

Similarly, we have Aang clamming up and getting uncomfortable whenever Katara shows any negative emotion, usually resulting in him making excuses or running away. Or, in the case of the Southern Raiders, lecturing her on how she needs to just let go of her anger about her mother’s murder. People have talked this episode to death and usually better than I ever could, so imma... keep it brief. There’s a serious disconnect between Aang and Katara in his ability to empathize with Katara and her needs that has her tamping down her vulnerability and amping up her anger. He tells her that he was able to forgive his people’s genocide and appa’s kidnapping (petnapping? Theft??), which is blatantly not true but also not an entirely equal parrallel to Katara’s situation, and continues making these little remarks throughout the episode. But it’s Zuko that Katara opens up to. It’s with him that she’s able to talk about the most traumatic day of her life, and it’s with him that she’s able to get the closure she needs, cementing their bond as friends and partners. This disagreement between Aang and Katara is then... never resolved. They just never bring it up and hear what the other is saying.

There’s a fic called The Portraits of Ember Island that has a line that so completely sums up the heart of the matter for why people love their dynamic. For context, zuko has woken up early to help Katara with the cooking and they spend the whole time just letting one another talk, and zuko stops to ask why she always just lets him talk. And so she stops to ask why he’s always helping, and it goes as follows:

There’s just... so much mutual support! Trust! Intimacy!! And it just continues like that from the Southern Raiders on, listening to each other, advising each other, watching each other’s backs! And then! Literally saving each other’s lives!! I will never be over the last Agni kai. Not ever. Zuko may have been willing to jump in front of lightning for anyone, but he actually did it for Katara. And in a show, that’s the thing that really matters. It’s a fulfilled trope usually exclusively applied to romantic pairings, and it ended up applying to Zuko and Katara. And then she ran out into the middle of a fight with tunnel vision just to get to him.

Also!! Also Zuko pushing Katara out of the way of the falling rocks at the Western Air Temple!! And Katara catching him as he fell from the war balloon that he fought Azula on!! Before they’re even getting along, they’re the ones reaching for each other. They come to this place of equal ground, as partners, who watch each other’s backs, call each other out but still listen attentively and understand, and provide the support that the other has been sorely lacking up until they knew each other (whether that be from lack of effort or lack of understanding from others, or an unwillingness to accept it for themselves).

Then, trailing along under the surface of this, we see the themes of the show totally embodied by Zuko and Katara as individuals and in their relationship to one another. There’s a YouTuber, sneezyreviews, who has a, like, 2-hour explanation on why she not only loves zutara but also believes that their endgame would’ve actually elevated the writing of atla to new levels particularly because of thematic cohesion and resolved character arcs. It’s the zutara dissertation I never knew I needed, and it’s funny and eloquent and effective, so I’m just going to sum up her section on thematic cohesion to the best of my abilities and then link it for whenever you have the time. And I HIGHLY recommend it, especially if you want a full understanding of what makes zutara so great and gives it such longevity.

Guru pathik has a line that goes something like this: separation is an illusion; things that seem different are just two parts of the same whole. Iroh also tells Zuko something similar: balance and strength are achieved when the different nations come together and influence one another and celebrate what makes them each unique. And this lesson is a massive central arc that both Zuko and Katara go through, moving past a black-and-white, good guys-vs-bad guys, us-vs-them mentality and into a greyer, more nuanced view of the world. Zuko sees the fire nation from an entirely new perspective and while he still loves and hopes for his nations future, he surrenders his blind loyalty to them in exchange for an unflinching loyalty to peace and love. Katara too had to come to terms with the fact that cruel people exist in the earth kingdom and water tribes, while some fire nation citizens are just regular, kind people who also need and deserve to have someone speak on their behalf. And this is honed in directly on how they view each other. They grow in their individual journeys to be open to the humanity in the other and then, once they’ve found that, they’re able to grow more in compassion for others in a beautiful feedback loop. And this is all matched in the symbolism repeatedly and intentionally associated with them in canon: sun and moon, fire and water, yin and yang, Oma and Shu who found love despite their warring nations. Their individual arcs are completed in each other and complement the themes of atla beautifully.

The canon pairs... just don’t. Which, again, is fine. But the very things that give atla longevity and popularity are anchored in zutara. Kat@ang doesn’t accomplish this. They’re... nice. Sweet. Especially when you erase a good portion of their interactions in S3. It could’ve been just a sweet love story. (Personally, the dynamic between toph and aang accomplish the same thing that zutara does, with complementary personalities that fulfill the theme of opposites blending in harmony) M@iko, on the other hand, is less sweet but I think wasn’t even supposed to last. Zuko’s relationship with Mai seems to represent his relationship with his old life as a whole. He can’t be emotionally vulnerable, he’s goaded into abusing his privileges, his agency and opinions aren’t respected. They just don’t have common ground with which to discuss anything that matters, so they don’t. As far as themes, the relationship doesn’t fit with atla. It’s zuko returning to and sticking with what is (on the surface) like him, what’s expected. Fire nation with fire nation. Fluid water bender with the flexible air bender. Like with like, separated from what is different and challenging and complementary.

And all of these things combined of course lead to the potential for the ship. I don’t know how familiar you are with the post-atla canon but... well, miss “I will never turn my back on people who need me”, miss “I don’t want to heal! I want to fight!” ends up living quietly in the SWT as a designated healer who turns a blind eye to the water tribe civil war happening right outside her front door. Which can be fine! People change! Some people just wanna stay inside. I just wanna stay inside! But the potential future for zutara is so much more satisfying, with Katara becoming the most unconventional Fire Lady the uppity old cads who are stuck on the old ways have ever seen. Fanon has her serving as a voice for the other nations within a kingdom at the point of its biggest political upheaval, as a confidante to Zuko who can actually help him while he’s trying to figure out how to move forward and make reparations. They have the opportunity, together, to accomplish what they both have set on their hearts to fight for: positive change that lends itself to harmony and balance. And the steambabies! A popular headcanon is that their firstborn daughter, the crown princess, is actually a waterbender, which causes such an uproar among the people who are adamantly clinging to the old ways. It’s just a future full of potential to be forces for good together, full of trust, intimacy, joy. The exact era of peace and love and balance that zuko announces that he intends to ring in with the start of his reign as Fire Lord is, again, magnified by the very personal zutara relationship. And we love to see it.

tl;dr zutara isn’t for everyone. Some people just don’t vibe with it. Some are nostalgic. Some love the canon they grew up with. Some have been disappointed for years. Some just see themselves in other characters and want their happiness instead. Whatever the reason, that’s fine. But for me, I love the way these two, from the moment they give each other a fair chance, are able to lower their walls and prejudices to see the other for the kindred spirits they are. They see each other’s humanity, and their response is to pour out love and support and compassion. I love that they’re a power couple in battle. I love the symbolism and, honestly, soulmatism that colors their every interaction. I love that they embody the whole storyline of atla in their relationship and how it develops, which is notably why their seasonal arcs always culminate in each finale with how they relate to one another. I love that zuko adopting a waterbending move is what actually saves his life and then katara’s. I love the chemistry! And I love the future they could’ve had, instead of the ones they were given.

So, in conclusion: I just think they’re neat and I hope you do too, at least a little bit. Even if it’s just respectfully from a disinterested distance cause you do you. And now here is the video I mentioned. I’m sorry this post got so long and then I gave you an even longer homework assignment, but I can’t recommend it enough. She says it all better than I can.

#zutara #atla #zutara rant #like really the way the canon relationships were written throughout s3 #it would’ve been more believable for zutara to happen #or at least be hinted at #all of the major issues presented in those relationship were dug up extensively and then... never resolved #and then they just slapped some kisses on a screen and said ‘there all better’ #and we just kinda had to say ‘oh ok guess it’s all better then’ #this got long I’m sorry #I wrote it all out and then tumblr ate 2/3 of it #which is why it took so long #and what I’ve written now doesn’t even match what I had before #because there’s too much to say about why I love zutara #and the stuff I left out the first time is what came out this time #rip to my original thoughts but this post is different #anyway that’s why this took so long #and I should’ve just made a PowerPoint... #I can do that too if you’d rather not read all of this lol #I won’t be offended #this is incoherent #Alia rambles uselessly #also hoping this doesn’t end up in any wrong tags because I don’t wanna step on toes lol #it’s not anti!! it’s just critical #in a compare/contrast way #I can pinpoint the moment when I started trying to rewrite my points from memory #because everything gets shorter and more succinct #like... I really said all that??? sounds fake and I don’t remember it anyway so here’s the condensed version #with no!! smooth!!! transitions!!!! #also why am I so lazy with proper grammar over text

[clarenecessities]

As my followers may have picked up from my long, spiraling rants, I’ve undertaken a new research project, courtesy of the death grip She-Ra has on my brain. And guess what? It’s finally at Disseminate Information Stage! So I’m going to lay out all of the gods, demigods, and godbeasts of the Masters of the Universe. With sources!

This table is more of a cheat sheet. We’re gonna tackle this god by god, with a section on Actual Lore & a meta section to help you decide how valid you think they are, because frankly some canons are more canon than others.

Asklepia, Benevolent Snake Goddess

Lore: Asklepia is one of two snake goddesses, the benevolent twin sister of Serpentia. We know very little about her abilities, but the Snake Clan (a clan of human warriors) were said to worship her, and they were famed for their architecture and healing. She had the ability to curse and deform people--to what extent is uncertain, but she’s known to have condemned a fallen priest named Ka, whose disfigured likeness now adorns Snake Mountain.

Behind the Scenes: First appearing in the 1987 comic “Il Nero Cristallo Del Potere“, Asklepia remained nameless for over 30 years, until Masters of the Universe Classics (MOTUC) released a few choice bios. For the unfamiliar, MOTUC seeks to reconcile the often contradictory canons into one overarching narrative, which is great in theory, but in practice is kind of like putting ice cream on a hot dog. And calling it a Chilly Dog ® as if that makes it taste better. But I digress. In 2019 they released a bio for the Staff of Ka which finally put a name to the less-evil Snake Goddess, in an obvious nod to Asclepius and the asklepian (that staff+snake icon people put on medical stuff).

Sharella, the Green Goddess and/or “Avatar” of Asklepia

Lore: Contradictory

Long Version: Okay I’ve put avatar in quotes because it is... contentious. Basically, and you’ll see here why I felt the need to make this post instead of relying blindly on the wikis, Sharella was introduced (in the ‘87 licensing guide) as a tribal leader who had joint custody of Gray, the original name of He-Ro’s alter ego, while he was growing up. This was further developed by Emiliano Santalucia’s concept work, wherein she was the leader of the Green Tiger Tribe (GTT) specifically. While the comic concept was not run through licensing & is thus not “canon”, the idea of her leading the GTT persisted. This teeny tiny image of her from Tytus and Megator’s 1987 Italian box art was all we had until 2008, when one of He-Man’s accessories described her as the “warrior woman ally” of Queen Veena, “who had been changed into the immortal green-skinned avatar of the Goddess Asklepia”. In 2009, MOTUC released a figure for The Goddess, apparently forgetting they’d done that shit the year before because the packaging did say “K’yrulla” was her real name. They had to cover it up with a sticker. 

So who’s The Goddess? Way back in the days before Mattel solidified any of the lore around MOTU, there were mini-comics released with the toys. Initially, the Goddess served a similar function to the Sorceress in the cartoon, and was in fact sometimes called the Sorceress. She facilitated He-Man’s transformations, gave him missions, was generally magical and mysterious, etc. If you know who the Sorceress is, and you can picture Teela, but green? That’s about it.

Back to Sharella, though. The Third Ultimate Battleground rolled around in 2015, and for the first time since some packaging in the 80s, we saw Sharella in action! She was shot through the heart with a poison arrow. Yeah. But don’t worry, she received a blood transfusion from Moss Man (who we’ll get to later), and was transformed into the Green Goddess! She’s immortal now. How Asklepia figures in here is sort of unclear, which is weird since this is still part of the MOTUC line, but whatever. Whatever! Queen Grayskull (the aforementioned Veena) received a bio in 2015 as well, which described Sharella as her apprentice who became “The Goddess”.

Horokoth, Aspect of the Mother Goddess

Lore: DC went a little batshit (pun intended) with the lore for the Eternity War. Here the Goddess is three combined aspects, “Serpos” (Serpentia) for the Snake Men, Zoar for the human “Eternians”, and a third, invented deity called Horokoth, who represents the Horde. Horokoth is “the coming destroyer. The darkness at the end of days.” and is represented by a bat.

Behind the Scenes: That last link has a clearer picture of her, it just didn’t crop well. Also, I confess I couldn’t bring myself to read Eternity War. As thrilling as the prospect of a cohesive narrative is, if I wanted to see Adora slit her brother’s throat there’s the edgier side of deviantArt to peruse. Therefore I know little of Horokoth outside of a few still images of Hordak. The bat was almost certainly selected for the Horde’s vespertilian emblem.

Hordeous, God-Beast of Horokoth

Lore: A “primordial”, bat-like godbeast of Horokoth, created in response to the god Saz’s feline races. Their face was “forever infused“ on the surface of Horde World by Horde Lord (Hordak and Horde Prime’s father in the MOTUC canon) to grant their family power and immortality.

Behind the Scenes: Yes they’ve used some words wrong, but they’ve got the spirit, right? Hordeous was (allegedly, this is secondhand) an invention of the MOTUC crew in answer to Horokoth. Now, the Horde Supreme bio predates Horokoth’s introduction by about 3 years, but obviously the comics were in production already. There’s an undated sketch of Horokoth Hordak from an undated interview (thanks for nothing you useless website) but in that same gallery there’s an orko sketch labeled 2012 so. We’re good right? That makes sense, timeline-wise. Anyway the comics slam dunked Horde Prime out of existence and combined him with Horde Lord so it’s contradictory anyway. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Serpentia, Malevolent Snake Goddess

Lore: The evil counterpart of Asklepia, Serpentia is the goddess of the Snake Men. The priest Ka of the Snake Clan forsook Asklepia in her favor, destroying Asklepia’s sacred orb and stealing the Serpent Ring (an artefact capable of transforming humans into Snake Men) from the Ophidian Spire with King Hsss. In DC’s triune interpretation of the Goddess, Serpentia (here ‘Serpos’) is blood, passion, and desire. A primal and primordial force appearing to the Snake Men in their own image.

Behind the Scenes: Okay yes I’ve reused the Asklepia pic but in my defense they are twins and this is the easiest one to crop. So here’s the thing about Serpentia: we only got a name for her in 2019. We knew there was a snake goddess, and she was pretty evil, or at least hostile towards mammalian life (see: the source of the pic I chose for her). Where Asklepia references the asklepian, ‘Serpentia’ is a much more heavy-handed snake reference, even though Anguis was right there. Those Masters Mondays came through for us, though, with the shield and staff of Ka, Ssssylph, and of course MOTUC’s Dark Despot Skeletor, which is. something. Though only recently named, Serpentia has been a shadow over Eternia since the Snake Men’s introduction in 1985 (or, depending on how much of the presented backstory you accept, even sooner in the form of Skeletor’s lair, Snake Mountain).

Serpos/Sarcedon, God-Beast of Snake Mountain

Lore: Contradictory, but the gist of it is he’s a very large snake with elemental magic and a grudge, that was turned to stone and became Snake Mountain.

Long Version: Snake Mountain was conceived of towards the end of 1982, but wasn’t revealed to the public until September of 1983, with the debut of the Filmation cartoon. For another year, the snake coiled around its summit was simply a carving, its mouth hollowed out for Skeletor to stand in and loom. But in 1984 the Snake Mountain toy was released, completely discarding the Filmation design in favor of the hewn face of the figure we now call Ka. Instead of a snake carving winding its way up the peak, the Mattel toy featured a ‘striking serpent’, alive and attached to the mountain itself. From there, it was an easy leap to make to ‘this carving comes alive’. So easy, in fact, that they did it twice!

First attempted in 1985 in the newspaper storyline “Vengeance of the Viper King”, the snake was here called Sarcedon, the World Destroyer. At the dawn of time, he was said to crush Eternia within his deadly coils. He burrowed deep into the ground, causing fearsome storms that nearly destroyed the planet. Only a fearless hero (implied to be He-Ro) could defeat and imprison Sarcedon. Using a macguffin called a Mirror of History, He-Man forced Sarcedon to behold his own reflection in a reference to the Medusa myth that kind of missed the point of it being reflective. Sarcedon was sent back in time, Snake Mountain was restored, the good guys win, blah blah blah.

That was the last of it until the MYP cartoon in 2004. Serpos as a name was actually first invoked by Mer-Man in a 1982 minicomic, but like it probably wasn’t about the snake. Anyway in the MYP cartoon the Snake Men get this thing called the Medallion of Serpos that lets them un-petrify the snake around Snake Mountain, grow two more heads, and unleash his godly wrath. He breathes fire, trashes Eternos, beats up He-Man, then turns his attention on Castle Grayskull to consume the Orb of Power (containing the strength and wisdom of the Elders, who had first trapped him in stone). He-Man cuts off Serpos’s extra heads with a sword upgrade, the Elders are somehow magically restored to life, and they re-petrify him. Snake Mountain is restored, the good guys win, blah blah blah.

Zoar, the Fighting Falcon

Lore: Contradictory, but it sure is a bird!

Long Version: While Sharella’s backstory is fraught because of the comics couldn’t decide what they wanted her to be, Zoar was similarly tangled up by the toyline. Initially male, he went through several color schemes, some prettier than others. Though there was a vague association with the Sorceress before the cartoon (recall that pre-Filmation, the Sorceress was just the Goddess), Filmation made them literally inseperable by designating Zoar as the Sorceress’s falcon form, to which she was confined when leaving Castle Grayskull.

Some of the comics and Golden books showed Zoar as being flipping enormous & ridden into battle as a steed by Teela and Man-at-Arms. Pre-Filmation, Zoar was always referred to as male, but post-Filmation, always female, as an incarnation of the Sorceress.

The Eternity Wars comics describe Zoar as the third aspect of the Goddess, the ‘Great Preserver’ whose light would shine through the universe for eternity. They pull off a sort of tripartite priestess thing where it’s Serpos/Zoar/Horokoth represented by Teela-Na (the Sorceress)/Teela/Evil-Lyn.

MOTUC, of course, had to reconcile all of these contradictory canons. How’d they do it? “In the folklore of Eternia, the golden falcon symbolized the godhead Zoar, a powerful deity of Preternia. As a god, Zoar could appear in both male and female guises and while the blue-tipped female falcon was associated with the Sorceress of Grayskull, the golden falcon represented Zoar's masculine nature.” So Zoar is genderfluid now, and the Sorceress is merely borrowing their form when transforming into a falcon. This bio also established that Zoar had anointed the first Sorceress, Veena (Queen Grayskull), which explains why she has wings for no apparent reason.

Also it’s not offically MOTUC but the scultors of the line, Four Horsemen, made a single anthro Zoar for Power-Con 2013. In case you need that for some reason.

Glorybird, Emissary of Zoar

Lore: Many millennia ago, there were three siblings, who were very poor and mistreated by their stepmother, but had hearts filled with kindness and love. Zoar, recognizing their resilience and desire to help people, sent an emissary named Glorybird. Glorybird bestowed upon each sibling a divine gift, but as they used their new powers to fight for good, their stepmother revealed herself to be a Celestial Witch & attempted to sacrifice them to Zoar’s “greatest enemy”, Horokoth.  

Backstory: Okay, so the Star Sisters (and Glorybird) were in exactly one episode of She-Ra, primarily to set them up as new toy designs. While prototypes were made for these, the figures weren’t actually produced until MOTUC released figures for them in 2012. Though they were referenced in Princess Prom, and we saw a brief cameo in a background, Glorybird was absent until the introduction of the Star Siblings in Season Five.

That’s right! This bird is a god, and there’s nothing you can do about it.

Saz, God of All Felines

Lore: One of the “Gods of the Multiverse” (he is the only member named explicitly), Saz was a blue-furred, feline deity responsible for the creation of all cats, humanoid or otherwise. He transformed himself into an enormous cat-beast to defeat Serpos and Hordeous, whose progenitors created them in envy of his children. Though Serpos was defeated, Hordeous escaped into the cosmos, and Saz himself vanished mysteriously.

Behind the Scenes: “By the whiskers of Saz!” is a fun pseudo-swear made by various cat races throughout MOTU, first in He-Man’s “The Cat and the Spider” and later in She-Ra’s “Magicats”. That was the only real mention of him until... okay, so MOTUC bios aren’t always attached to the product. Starting in 2018, they did this thing called Masters Mondays where they put unposted bios on the org forums. So while we’ve had the sword since 2010, we didn’t get the background on it until March of 2020. And then a couple weeks later, the Cat Mask of Catra bio referred to him as a “mystical being” instead of a god, but the mask was from 2011 so. He may not have been a god yet. It really depends on when the bios were actually written.

Saz wielded a blade probably best described as a falchion, whose quillon & langet formed a vaguely triangular shape around a deep red gem. I want to be clear that while it looks totally rad, this sword would be very impractical and have poor structural integrity were it not made by a literal god. Do not make swords like this. Also it’s almost certainly riffing on the Sword of Omens from Thundercats (affectionate).

Sabe-Or, Son of Saz

Lore: A green-furred, orange-striped paladin, Sabe-Or is one of the only named Ancients. He inherited his father’s blade upon Saz’s mysterious disappearance, and lived for centuries more. Upon his death, he transferred his “heroic essence” into a group of Eternian tigers, forever transforming them into the Green Tiger Tribe, whence both Granger (steed of King Grayskull), and Cringer, steed of Prince Adam.

Behind the Scenes: So “Battle Cat Man” is a concept that’s existed since they decided to make their hero ride a wicked tiger into battle. If you show a kid a superhero, and a supertiger, apparently the natural inclination of most children in the 80s was to combine the two. There are so many custom action figures. So, so many. Sabe-Or is visually a clear reference to this concept, and canonically seems to be the closest we’re going to get outside of the Thundercats crossover, unless you count Cowarros from 4H’s Mythic Legions line (I do, because it means Purrrplor is also canon and I fucking love calling him that).

Moss Man, Ancient Eternian Nature God

Lore: An ally of King Grayskull, Moss Man was something of an Eternian cryptid in the centuries leading up to He-Man Times. He has control over all plant life, the ability to meld with plants, and apparently can imbue sentience to said plants.

Behind the Scenes: Moss Man wasn’t featured in many episodes, because he’s a little... incredibly over-powered. He’s literally Bigfoot from 5000 years ago with magic powers. And like, since I don’t think the writers appreciate how long 5000 years is, you know what happened 5000 years ago? Stonehenge. This bitch is Stonehenge-old. But sure, you can trace a direct line of descent from his contemporary. smh. Anyway according to MOTUC his real name is Kreann’Ot N’Norosh so make of that what you will. Also his toys were pine-scented. I just love that.

Evil Seed, Rebellious Creation of Moss Man

Lore: Created by Moss Man to help fight in the Great Wars, Evil Seed betrayed his master and turned to evil (who could have foreseen this...), finding joy in corrupting all forms of plant life for his own amusement. Moss Man imprisoned him in enchanted chains, keeping him restrained for many millennia.

Behind the Scenes: According to MOTUC, his real name is Sero Malustro, clumsy New Latin for “(to) plant evil-burnt“. Why his name is New Latin and Moss Man’s is... whatever that is, I have no idea. As you can see from the image I included, he originally had an artichoke head, which was upgraded for the Mike Young Productions (MYP) cartoon. Personally I think the artichoke rules.

Volcana, the Fire Goddess

Lore: Canonically, she’s a fire goddess, and the mother of the Volcano Magus. Together, they are a rising force that seeks to conquer Etheria in the wake of Hordak’s defeat.

Backstory: Volcana has taken a long a twisted journey, but was first revealed to fans at Power-Con 2016 in a panel revealing previously unseen concepts and characters. After the first wave of She-Ra toys, a second wave was planned with a snow focus, to bring more attention the Filmation-neglected Frosta. This began with the introduction of a fire villain, an “evil lady that glows with heat” who would attempt to melt Castle Chill. That concept actually refers to a character named Amber (not Ember, as one might assume) who was reworked into a benevolent counterpart, Volcana’s twin sister.

Volcana was later fleshed out to be a Fire Goddess with flame-red hair, x-ray vision, and arms sculpted with flames. Her cape flew up with flame detail that rose up to control the volcano (of Volcanica, a proposed toyset that seems to have been reworked into the Crystal Falls). She was emphasized by Mattel to not start fires, which, honestly, is probably why they scrapped the character. He-Man couldn’t use his sword as a sword; a woman made of fire was basically doomed.

Now, though, we’re several decades in and lines made for collecters that are largely in their 30s and 40s can say whatever they want! So she’s canon, even if Amber isn’t. Yes there’s only one mention of her. Amber technically was mentioned in an unproduced episode titled “Amber Waves of Flame”, but as it was unproduced, it’s noncanonical.

Volcano Magus, Sinister Son of Volcana

Lore: Living within a dormant volcano, the Volcano Magus of the German audio plays was the source of most of Catra’s power and all of her evil intent. He supplied her with magic for spells and schemes with which to assail the Crystal Castle, but neither she nor Clawdeen were aware of the dark influence he held over them.

In the MOTUC canon, he’s specified as the son of Volcana, a demigod from the “Region of Volcanoes” who craved the nature magic of the Whispering Woods. When he learned the Twiggets were inextricably linked to that magic, he used his powers to petrify the former Rebels (this was after the Horde's defeat) and kidnap three Twiggets to drain the magic from their souls. Twiggets, for the uninitiated, are like purple tree-elf things. According to MOTUC, Razz is a Twigget, though the ‘real’ name they assigned her doesn’t fit their naming convention. She is purple, I guess.

Kowl, who avoided petrification, read Razz's spellbooks to find a way to save his friends, and learned of an Entrapment Gem that she hid in a shoe, for some reason. He confronted the Volcano Magus, spoke in the ancient tongue of the First Ones, and sucked him into the Gem.

Backstory: Admittedly this stuff is second hand, as I don’t speak German & they only have transcriptions/translations for the He-Man tapes anyway, but if anybody can find me an audio file I will do my best to verify. The MOTUC stuff at least I can confirm 100% because it’s from 2019 & I do speak English, for better or worse.

Oak, the Jackal God

Lore: Oak was the terrible Jackal God worshiped by the denizens of Zhar, an ancient civilization that once existed in a remote, forested region of Eternia. Long ago, Oak was imprisoned within a statue which could be found within the Temple of the Jackal. When Skeletor removed the statue from the temple, Oak broke free of the enchantment which imprisoned him and wreaked havoc on Eternia. Although the Jackal God was immensely powerful, he could be weakened by the elements of nature and was ultimately foiled by a rainstorm conjured by the combined powers of He-Man's sword and the magic of the temple's guardian priest.

Backstory: I have lifted this from a He-Man guide word for word as I cannot for the life of me find a copy of the Brazilian Editora Abril comic he came from, O Templo Do Chacal (1986). The description is like, suspiciously similar to the plot of the He-Man episode The Cat and the Spider, except the Grimalkin was never described as a god. The rest of it--statue, Skeletor, storm defeat--plays out almost the same. True pity I can’t find the original source, but I do trust this guidebook. You may be interested in Ceres from the UK comics--another dog-slash-statue who frankly might as well be a god himself, but as he’s not called one in canon he’s not going on the list.

The Bitter Rose Goddess

Lore: As Man-at-Arms told the legend, “Every day, a woman climbed Rose Mountain to look for her husband to return from the war. Alas, he never came back. Her tears poured from her cheek and entered the ground. One day she disappeared, but where she stood was a single, solitary rose. It’s the only thing that grows on Rose Mountain.”

The Insect People, who lived at the base of Rose Mountain, believed that the Bitter Rose is all that held the mountain together (and when it was picked, they were proved right). After the flower was restored, it transformed into the Bitter Rose Goddess herself, who explained that she had been a prisoner of her love's sorrow, so bitter that she refused to allow anything else to grow on Rose Mountain. She blessed the surrounding area, blanketing the jagged peaks with roses, and disappeared.

Backstory: She’s kind of... barely a god. She showed up in one episode and no other media & has objectively less power than like, every single demon they ever brought in. I almost didn’t put her on this list.

Mask-Ra, Goddess of Masks

Lore: A goddess who created the magical Masks of Power.

Backstory: Mask-Ra was first mentioned in 2019 and like, look, I’m gonna be real. I don’t respect her. She’s an invention of MOTUC (unless they were drawing on this concept art of Maska-Ra, which I doubt bc he was a Man-E-Faces precursor) and they retconned her into having created Catra’s mask, which is kind of redundant given the entire episode Magicats. This mask did not need two bios. There are no other mentions of her in any canon.

Potential other Masks of Power: The Deemos and Tyrella masks from the He-Man episode “Masks of Power”, lizard and canine masks from the mini-comic “Masks of Power”, Lord Masque’s Demon Mask from the He-Man episode “House of Shokoti, Part 1″, and whatever the hell Red Shadow has going on.

Procrustus, Giant Guardian of Magic

Lore: During the creation of the various dimensions (5 in MOTUC canon but demonstratably higher everywhere else), the gods installed the four-armed, immortal giant Procrustus to guard their secrets at the heart of Eternia. There lay the Starseed, from which the entire dimension was created. It still held immeasurable power, and could be used to conquer entire universes. Hordak, in an attempt to access the Starseed, cracked Eternia in two with the Spell of Separation. Though he was (mostly) thwarted, from then on Procrustus was forced to hold the two halves of Eternia together from within, lest the planet break apart and the Starseed be exposed.

Backstory: First appearing in the mini-comic “The Magic Stealer!”, Procrustus is a lot more tangible than most gods. We know where he is, at all times, and he seems confined to one size. His powers appear to be largely physical, as he had to burrow out of the ground to investigate in the mini-comic instead of teleporting or like, magicking the dirt away. This was his only appearance until MOTUC released a figure for him in 2012. He also showed up in the Subternia map the next year, holding Eternia together.

Standor, Cosmic Creator of Power

Lore: “Before time began, the great Gods of the multiverse convened in the Hall of Power to create all that was and all that will ever be. Head architect of this great task was Standor. A cosmic being of unlimited imagination, Standor helped lead his fellow deities by fueling their energies with raw creative force.”

Backstory: Released for Comikaze 2013 to celebrate the partnership of Mattel and Pow! Entertainment, Standor is literally just Stan Lee But a God. The prototype was called Standar--idk why they changed it, but I think it’s because it’s too easy to confuse with “Standard”. They made a bio for his sunglasses. I don’t want to talk about it.

Bash-Or, Slain Mystic God-Beast

Lore: Very little is known of Bash-Or, the Ram. His last remnant was sealed within the Ram Stone by the ancient sorceror kings of Zalesia, imbuing it with his divine power to overcome any barrier, magical or otherwise.

Backstory: Bash-Or was revealed in the bio for the Ram Stone, September of 2020, but his spirit (previously referred to as ‘the Spirit of the Ram Stone’) was twice utilized by Skeletor in the MYP cartoon, to great effect, before the stone was destroyed.

#she-ra #spop #motu #he-man #clare shares notes #edited to actually include the gd graph

[superanimeidiot]

what was supposed to be a teeny tiny drabble (it’s not)

Ok so I was writing Karma’s confrontation with his mother and then THIS scene popped into my head. It doesn’t fit at all in the chapter (it’s supposed to be about Karma and his mom duh) but I really really wanted to write it anyway so I figured I would write the little scene and post it here but THEN it turned into this 2k word monstrosity that was SUPPOSED to be a SMALL SCENE but it decided it was going to make me stay up until 2 AM WRITING IT and it just wouldn’t LEAVE ME ALONE. So yeah I’m kinda sleep deprived and this has only been very lightly proofread and hasn’t gone through nearly as much fine-tuning as I normally put my writing through but it is currently 2:37 AM and I am satisfied with it for now so HERE HAVE THIS SCRAP I HOPE YOU LIKE IT

(also this is set the night Korosensei died. If I’m remembering canon right they killed Korosensei then, like, hid up in their classroom until leaving for graduation? Which is so messed up on so many levels like why did they go straight from a very traumatic event to their graduation without even seeing their families or SLEEPING???? So I hereby declare that, with the whole crisis thing, Kunugigaoka postponed the graduation ceremony and after they killed Korosensei Class E was taken to that government station place I vaguely remember they were taken to in canon and their parents were called to pick them up.)

Karma is curled up in a stiff plastic chair, knees pulled up to his chest, a shock blanket wrapped around his shoulders, and his cellphone clutched between his fingers, when his father finds him. Gakuhou doesn’t say anything. He sits beside Karma in his own stiff plastic chair and watches him, not saying a word.

Karma swallows around the lump that’s been lodged in his throat since Korosensei died. “You don’t have to stay with me,” he says, his voice hoarse from the aforementioned lump. He hasn’t spoken since the mountaintop. That’s why the police wrapped him in the shock blanket. “Mom is on her way.”

“Okay,” his father says, but he doesn’t move. 

Karma is too tired to dredge up the familiar anger. He’s too tired for anything. He thinks he’ll be this tired forever - the kind of bone-deep exhaustion that reaches to the soul and weighs his whole body down. He traces a finger across the edge of his phone. 

“They’re going to get rid of you,” he says. He doesn’t sound happy, or vindictive, or smug - just very matter-of-fact. “The parents will be out for blood, and they can’t go after the government. You make a very nice scapegoat.”

His father gives a soft exhale that could, charitably, be called a laugh. “Yes,” he agrees. “My days at Kunugigaoka are over. Does that make you happy?” he asks, only mildly curious.

Karma taps a finger against his phone, considering. “If I was a nice person,” he says, slowly, “I would say no.”

Gakuhou does laugh at that. “You’re my son,” he says. “You were never going to be a nice person.”

Karma glares from the corner of his eye, but doesn’t contest it. “It serves you right,” he decides. “After all the crap you pulled in this school, you deserve to be kicked out on your ass.”

Gakuhou nods. “A fair assessment.”

They sit in silence, neither comfortable nor uncomfortable. Karma’s phone buzzes with a text from his mother, telling him they’re fifteen minutes away but traffic might delay them. Karma wonders what kind of traffic could possibly exist at this hour, then realizes the traffic that occurs after major, life-altering events. He sends back a thumbs up emoji. His hands, unoccupied once more, begin to tap a staccato beat against the back of his cell.

His father remains absolutely still in his chair, no signs of nervous movement or absentminded tics. Clearly, Karma’s restless nature was not inherited from him. He seems content to sit with Karma in silence, but Karma, suddenly, is not.

“Why are you here?” he blurts out, with zero forethought. 

Gakuhou tilts his head. “Do you want me to leave?”

“That’s not an answer.”

His father huffs a quiet laugh, nodding his acknowledgement. “I saw the news,” he says after a long stretch of silence. “The reporter was talking about some monster in Kunugigaoka, and the government wasn’t saying anything. Nobody knew what was going on, just that something was happening and it was bad.” He pauses, and Karma waits, wondering when his father would get to the point that led him to sitting in an uncomfortable chair, keeping his estranged son company in the small hours of the morning.

“And then your mother called me.”

Karma visibly startles in his chair as a bolt of surprise rips through him. He’d been staring at his shoes during his father’s story, but now he turns to openly gape at Gakuhou. Never in a million years would he guess his mother would ever willingly, of her own volition, speak to his father again.

“Was she mad?” He realizes how stupid the question is as soon as it leaves his mouth. 

A wry sort of smile twists Gakuhou’s lips. “I think furious is putting it lightly. I couldn’t understand some of what she said through the screaming, but I got the gist. You had run off to Kunugigaoka on some suicide mission for your class, and if anything happened to you she would string me up herself.”

“She didn’t really say that,” Karma denies, then hesitates. “Did she?”

“No,” Gakuhou says drily, rubbing a tired palm against his eyes. “She was much more graphic.”

Karma’s jaw drops again. He can picture it suddenly, playing clear in his mind like a movie: his mother red-faced and rumpled in her pajamas as she screams at his father through her cell phone, crying and issuing threats in the same breath; his father, sitting at his desk or on his couch, watching the news in blank shock and listening to his ex-wife’s promises to kill him if anything happened to Karma.

Karma swallows roughly. “You deserve that too.”

“Yes,” Gakuhou agrees. “I do.”

Karma nods once, sharply, waiting for Gakuhou to resume his explanation.

“Your mother ran out of steam eventually and hung up. I called Karasuma and asked him what was going on, and he told me what he could. I woke Gakushuu up, told him what was happening and not to answer the door or phone unless it was me, and then I drove here.”

Karma nods again, thoughtfully this time. “That’s still not an answer,” he points out. “Why are you here,” he stresses, “with me, sitting in this stupid chair when you could be literally anywhere else?”

Gakuhou frowns, slumping back in his chair in a casual show of exhaustion Karma has never seen on him. “You’re my son,” he says, a raw edge in his voice, as if that is all the explanation required. “My youngest child.”

“I’m not a little kid anymore.”

“No,” his father agrees, almost sadly. “You’re not. You don’t need me to protect you anymore. This is probably more for me than you, anyway. I needed to know you were safe.”

He scoffs. “I didn’t know you cared.”

The wry smile makes a reappearance. “Neither did I. I had convinced myself I didn’t care what happened to you or your mother. At least, until you popped up in the last place I expected to find you.” He sighs softly, head tilting back to watch the ceiling. “I have many things to apologize for, Karma. I messed up with you in so many ways. But I don’t think you want to hear them right now, so I thought I could sit with you until your mother got here and…” he pauses, searching for the right words. He must give up on finding them, though, because he sighs gustily and sinks lower into his chair. “I don’t know what I’m doing here,” he admits. “I doubt I offer much in the way of comfort. Do you want me to leave?”

Karma considers. “Any other night, I would probably say yes. But tonight…” 

Tonight, they killed Korosensei. Tonight, he scraped his nerves raw during his confrontation with his mother. Tonight, he’d been sitting by himself in a stiff chair, wrapped in a shock blanket, replaying the night in his head and feeling more and more adrift until his father sat down beside him and made him feel less alone. 

“Tonight, you can stay,” he says. It’s still not forgiveness. His father hasn’t apologized yet, and Karma still hasn’t decided whether he’ll grant it. If anything, it’s a white flag - a temporary cease-fire. For now, it’s enough.

Gakuhou nods, and they settle back into silence. 

A while later, his phone buzzes again. It’s another text from his mother. They’re five minutes away now. His time with his father is ticking away. He wonders how he should spend it. Silence is probably safest. Karma is too numb right now to work up enough anger for a fight, but if he opens his mouth and says the wrong thing he might mess up the fragile truce they’ve landed on. He realizes, to his slight consternation, he doesn’t want to mess it up. 

What he does want, he realizes, is the answer to one simple question. If he’s lucky, Gakuhou will answer. If he’s really lucky, he’ll be too numb with shock for the answer to hurt too badly. 

He fiddles with his phone some more, twisting it in his fingers as he considers whether to ask his next question.  “If I ask you something,” he says, haltingly, “will you give me an honest answer?”

“Yes,” is the immediate reply.

“You’ll tell me the truth?” he presses. “Even if it hurts me? Even if it makes me hate you?”

“I thought you already hated me,” Gakuhou says, amused. Then, more serious, “I won’t lie to you, Karma. Even if it hurts. Ask your question.”

Karma nods, still considering. He checks his phone and sees he only has a few minutes before his parents arrive. Whatever, he thinks, metaphorically tossing up his hands. I’ve been torturing myself with this for years. At least now I’ll know. 

“Were you sad when mom took me?”

He’d like to say the room grew quiet after he spoke, but that would be a lie. People are still bustling around them, fielding phone calls and doing whatever government people do after a major crisis. The world moves on, even when you’re falling apart. 

Still, in their corner of the room, Karma feels like a bubble has separated him and Gakuhou from the rest of the world. The noise of other people doesn’t exist anymore. For him, there is only silence and the sound of his heartbeat as he waits for Gakuhou to answer.

It takes a long time. Or maybe it just feels long because he’s holding his breath.

“When I watched her drive away,” his father says, measuring the words out bit by bit, “and realized that was it - when I realized she was taking you and you weren’t coming back…” He sighs, a heavy sound. “Yes. It didn’t feel real until that moment. I watched the car disappear and thought I was having a heart attack. I locked myself in my office and drank an entire bottle of sake until it stopped hurting. I didn’t cry,” he muses aloud. “I think I was too sad to cry. Too sad, and I didn’t think I deserved to. It was my fault, after all. I drove you both away. I didn’t have the right to cry about it.”

Karma rests his chin on top of his knees as he processes. If he was in his right mind, he would probably be angry. That’s his typical response to anything his father says or does. The anger still feels far away right now, but he knows he’ll feel it eventually. Maybe not tomorrow (today?) or even the next day - not with grief for Korosensei still so fresh in his heart. Eventually, though, he’ll replay his father’s confession and feel a blood boiling rage he won’t know what to do with. It’s what he’s been waiting for all these years: his father admitting he loved him, maybe even that he still loves him. It’s every wish he’s ever made since he was a little kid. He’ll feel angry and heartbroken all over again, and he won’t even have Korosensei to help him deal with it (and oh, that thought sends a fresh wave of grief over him, so powerful he almost drowns in it. He latches onto the numbness and sinks further into it. It’s safer there).

He isn’t angry now, though, just numb and a little sad. He lifts his chin from his knees and presses his face against them, wrapping the blanket even tighter around himself. He’s hiding - either from his father or the world in general. He doesn’t know for sure, and he doesn’t feel like analyzing it. 

“If you had told me that six years ago,” he says into his knees, muffled but still audible, “I would’ve forgiven you for anything.”

It’s the truth. Eight year old Karma would have done anything to hear that his father was sad he left, that he loved him enough to be sad. He would have let go of every bitter feeling in his heart and forgiven Gakuhou wholeheartedly for every misdeed. Eight year old Karma, he thinks, was an idiot. 

Not an idiot, a voice that sounds suspiciously like Nagisa chides. Just a child. Just a kid who wanted to hear that his father loved him. That’s not stupid. That’s just how kids are.

His father doesn’t say anything, but Karma didn’t really want him to anyway. They’ve both said their piece. It’s too late to change the past, and neither are even sure if they have a future. Sometimes it’s best to let sleeping dogs lie. 

His phone buzzes, but this time it keeps buzzing. Twisting his head to the side so his cheek is pressed against his legs, he checks it. It’s his mother. She’s here, presumably, and looking for him. Time to go. He sighs, letting his feet fall to the floor as he stands, the blanket sliding from his shoulders and landing in a heap on his empty chair. He answers the call.

“Hi, mom,” he murmurs as he walks away. “I’m on my way out now.”

He doesn’t say goodbye.

#fanfiction #my writing #families shatter like glass series #Akabane Karma #assassination classroom #au #Karma and Gakushuu are brothers

[bamf-jaskier]

What the fuck is up with Triss and Geralt (in the books)

Hello! and in today’s wtf post, here is a summary of the relationship (or lack thereof, sorry Triss) of her and Geralt’s relationship in the books. 

TLDR: At the end of the day, Triss and Geralt have a clearly described mutual attraction to each other through all the books. However, Geralt’s attraction to Triss does not compare to his love for Yennefer and as such, despite Triss and Geralt sleeping together once, they set boundaries and relegate each other to friends. Geralt never fully stops being slightly drawn to and sympathetic towards Triss and Triss never fully falls out of love with Geralt. 

CW for minority graphic depictions of violence (standard for the books)

More under the cut:

So, let’s start out with their backstory. Here’s a snippet describing their hook-up from Blood of Elves. 

Then Geralt of Rivia appeared. A witcher leading a stormy life, and tied to her good friend Yennefer in a strange, turbulent and almost violent relationship.

Triss had watched them both and was jealous even though it seemed there was little to be jealous of. Their relationship quite obviously made them both unhappy, had led straight to destruction, pain and yet, against all logic… it had lasted. Triss couldn’t understand it. And it had fascinated her. It had fascinated her to such an extent that she had seduced the witcher – with the help of a little magic. 

She had hit on a propitious moment, a moment when he and Yennefer had scratched at each other’s eyes yet again and had abruptly parted. Geralt had needed warmth, and had wanted to forget.

No, Triss had not desired to take him away from Yennefer. As a matter of fact, her friend was more important to her than he was. But her brief relationship with the witcher had not disappointed. She had found what she was looking for – emotions in the form of guilt, anxiety and pain. His pain. 

She had experienced his emotions, it had excited her and, when they parted, she had been unable to forget it. And she had only recently understood what pain is. The moment when she had overwhelmingly wanted to be with him again. For a short while – just for a moment – to be with him.

So Geralt and Triss had sex once, and it is important to note that while CDPR took the interpretation that this meant Triss had assaulted Geralt and used that in their games, this is not explicitly said in canon. The single line “she had seduced the witcher – with the help of a little magic.” is also likely to be referring to how mages use transformation magic in order to alter their appearance to be more beautiful. This is mentioned by Fringilla in Baptism of Fire: 

She herself had regularly ridiculed the crude image painted by gossip and propaganda of the typical sorceress from the North: artificially beautiful, arrogant, vain and spoiled to the limits of perversion, and often beyond them.

Even then, Geralt has a pattern (similar to Yennefer as well with Istredd) of sleeping with other people such as Fringilla herself in Lady of the Lake when him and Yennefer are on a break. So it’s important to note for their relationship in the books, that there is nothing in the text that says that Triss assaulted Geralt and that is simply another literary interpretation of the relationship and not directly canon. 

Sometime after their hook-up Triss is presumed dead at the Battle of Sodden but goes to Kaer Morhen in order to teach Ciri magic. Here is Geralt and Triss’s reunion in Blood of Elves. 

“I’ll take your horse,” offered Geralt, reaching for the reins. Triss surreptitiously shifted her hand and their palms joined. So did their eyes.

“I’ll come with you,” she said naturally. “There are a few little things in the saddle-bags which I’ll need.”

“You gave me a very disagreeable experience not so long ago,” he muttered as soon as they had entered the stable. “I studied your impressive tombstone with my own eyes. The obelisk in memory of your heroic death at the battle of Sodden. The news that it was a mistake only reached me recently. I can’t understand how anyone could mistake anyone else for you, Triss.”

“It’s a long story,” she answered. “I’ll tell you some time. And please forgive me for the disagreeable moment.”

“There’s nothing to forgive. I’ve not had many reasons to be happy of late and the feelings I experienced on hearing that you lived cannot compare to any other. Except perhaps what I feel now when I look at you.”

Triss felt something explode inside her. Her fear of meeting the white-haired witcher, which had accompanied her throughout her journey, had struggled within her with her hope of having such a meeting. Followed by the sight of that tired, jaded face, those sick eyes which saw everything, cold and calculating, which were unnaturally calm but yet so infused with emotion…

She threw her arms around his neck, instantly, without thinking. She caught hold of his hand, abruptly placed it on the nape of her neck, under her hair. A tingling ran down her back, penetrated her with such rapture she almost cried out. In order to muffle and restrain the cry her lips found his lips and stuck to them. She trembled, pressing hard against him, her excitement building and increasing, forgetting herself more and more.

Geralt did not forget himself.

“Triss…Please.”

“Oh, Geralt… So much…”

“Triss.” He moved her away delicately. “We’re not alone… They’re coming.”

So they have a (bit) of a spicy post-death reunion where Geralt says some very nice and heartfelt things things that make Triss especially horny. Triss almost orgasms from a hug and kisses Geralt to avoid moaning (can you tell this series was written by a man yet?)

Then later, Geralt and Triss have a conversation about Geralt needing to reach out to Yennefer because Ciri’s trances and magic are becoming overwhelming. In fact, in this scene, Triss is pretty shaken up because she was just in a joint-trance with Ciri. So, post-trance in Blood of Elves Geralt brings up their past hook-up: 

“You have to get help from another magician. A more gifted one. More experienced. You know who I’m talking about.”

“I do.” He turned his head away, clenched his lips.

“Don’t resist. Don’t defend yourself. I can guess why you turned to me rather than her. Overcome your pride, crush your rancour and obstinacy. There is no point to it, you’ll torture yourself to death. And you are risking Ciri’s health and life in the process. Another trance is liable to be more dangerous to her than the Trial of Grasses. Ask Yennefer for help, Geralt.”

“And you, Triss?”

“What about me?” She swallowed with difficulty. “I’m not important. I let you down. I let you down… in everything. I was… I was your mistake. Nothing more.”

“Mistakes,” he said with effort, “are also important to me. I don’t cross them out of my life, or memory. And I never blame others for them. You are important to me, Triss, and always will be. You never let me down. Never. Believe me.”

She remained silent a long while.

“I will stay until spring,” she said finally, struggling against her shaking voice. “I will stay with Ciri… I will watch over her. Day and night. I will be with her day and night. And when spring is here… when spring is here we will take her to Melitele’s Temple in Ellander. The thing that wants to possess her might not be able to reach her in the temple. And then you will ask Yennefer for help.”

“All right, Triss. Thank you.”

“Geralt?”

“Yes.”

“Ciri said something else, didn’t she? Something only you heard. Tell me what it was.”

“No,” he protested and his voice quivered. “No, Triss.”

“Please.”

“She wasn’t speaking to me.”

“I know. She was speaking to me. Tell me, please.”

“After coming to… When I picked her up… She whispered: ‘Forget about him. Don’t torture him.’”

“I won’t,” she said quietly. “But I can’t forget. Forgive me.”

“I am the one who ought to be asking for forgiveness. And not only asking you.”

“You love her that much,” she stated, not asking.

“That much,” he admitted in a whisper after a long moment of silence.

“Geralt.”

“Yes, Triss?”

“Stay with me tonight.”

“Triss…”

“Only stay.”

“All right.”

Okay this scene makes me feel a lot of emotions because Triss knows she has to let go of Geralt and she genuinely wants to because she values her friendship with Yennefer more. But like she said, she can’t forget. And it’s also important that in the same way Triss asks forgiveness, Geralt is asking forgiveness too. He knows that he slept with Triss while still in love with Yennefer and while, like he says, he doesn’t think his mistake is unimportant, he is not going to pursue a romantic relationship with Triss. 

This scene is so important because it sets the boundaries for the two of them. Especially at the end with Triss asking Geralt to stay the night with her platonically, it’s them trying to re-gain their friendship without the romantic aspect. Triss is a pretty insecure character in the books. In fact, in an interview when asked what immediately came to mind when her name was mentioned, Andrzej Sapkowski said: insecure and red-headed. So her setting these boundaries for herself is important and Geralt setting these boundaries is important as well. 

After this, Geralt stays as as close friend of Triss, even comforting her when she recounts the Battle of Sodden (which btw is one of my favorite book Triss moments in the series, it’s so powerful). 

Then, Triss is traveling with Ciri and Geralt and gets very bad food poisoning and basically has to be nursed back to health by the two of them and Geralt has to literally hold her as she shits herself in the woods. So it’s nice that he’s being a supportive friends but also it’s a gross situation. 

On the road, when asked by Yarpen who Triss is to Geralt (Triss is currently very sick and asleep) he replies in Blood of Elves: 

“Who is this Triss to you?”

“What difference does it make in this situation?”

“In this situation – none. I asked out of an inappropriate curiosity born of the desire to start new rumours going around the inns. But be that as it may, you’re mighty attracted to this enchantress, Geralt.”

The witcher smiled sadly.

You can tell that there is a still a lingering sense of attraction. But it’s not love and it pales in comparison to what Geralt feels for Yennefer. So it’s important Geralt keeps up the boundaries he set earlier. But it’s not just Geralt who has trouble letting go. When Triss is in the worst part of her fever she says this to Geralt: 

“Oh, Geralt,” she sobbed. “I so regret… I so regret that what was between us”

“Triss, please.”

“…it should have happened… now. When I’m better… It would be entirely different… I could… I could even—”

“Triss.”

“I envy Yennefer… I envy her you—”

“Ciri, step out.”

“But—”

“Go, please.”

It’s hard for the both of them, in my opinion Triss far more than Geralt but they both struggle. 

It’s important to note that at the end of Blood of Elves, Yennefer also finds out the whole story about Triss and Geralt from Ciri:

There was a subject which the girl [Ciri] instinctively and carefully avoided. But one day, she got carried away and spoke out. About Triss Merigold. Yennefer, as if casually, as if indifferently, asking as if banal, sparing questions, dragged the rest from her. Her eyes were hard and impenetrable.

Now, the next time Geralt and Triss meet, Geralt and Yennefer were invited along by Philippa to attend a mages’ meeting on the island Thanedd. Here is their meeting from Time of Contempt: 

They went over to Triss, who was shimmering in shades of blue and pale green. On seeing them, Triss broke off her conversation with two sorcerers, smiled radiantly and hugged Yennefer; the ritual of kissing the air near each other’s ears was repeated. Geralt took the proffered hand, but decided to act contrary to the rules of etiquette; he embraced the chestnut-haired enchantress and kissed her on her soft cheek, as downy as a peach. Triss blushed faintly.

So, Yennefer knows that they slept together but they all seem to be able to co-exist together which is good. Yennefer and Triss even have a sem-nice conversation about Ciri together moments later:

“They’re on excellent terms,’ Yennefer warned her gravely. ‘Be careful, Triss. Don’t breathe a word to him about–about you know who.’

‘I know. I’ll be careful. And by the way…’ Triss lowered her voice. ‘How’s she doing? Will I be able to see her?’

‘If you finally decide to run classes at Aretuza,’ smiled Yennefer, ‘you’ll be able to see her very often.’

‘Ah,’ said Triss, opening her eyes widely. ‘I see. Is Ciri…?’

‘Be quiet, Triss. We’ll talk about it later. Tomorrow. After the Council.”

“Tomorrow?’ said Triss, smiling strangely. Yennefer frowned, but before she had time to ask a question, a slight commotion suddenly broke out in the hall.”

This is an important conversation, because Philippa set up the Thanned meeting as a way to arrest Nilfgaardian mages such as Vilgefortz and Francesca and Triss was in on this planned coup while Yennefer was not. However, I don’t want to get too off-track, so back to Geralt and Triss’ relationship! 

Triss in Time of Contempt, mentions to Geralt that Yennefer is member of the mage’s council and asks Yennefer why she hadn’t told Geralt yet and this is Yennefer’s reply: 

“No, darling,’ said the enchantress, looking her friend straight in the eyes. ‘For one thing, I don’t like to boast. For another, there’s been no time. I haven’t seen Geralt for ages, and we have a lot of catching up to do. There’s already a long list. We’re going through it point by point.’

‘I see,’ said Triss hesitantly. ‘Hmm… After such a long time I understand. You must have lots to talk about…’

‘Talking,’ smiled Yennefer suggestively, giving the Witcher another smouldering glance, ‘is way down the list. Right at the very bottom, Triss.’

The chestnut-haired enchantress was clearly discomfited and blushed faintly.

‘I see,’ she said, playing in embarrassment with her lapis-lazuli heart.

‘I’m so glad you do. Geralt, bring us some wine. No, not from that page. From that one, over there.”

Then, Geralt asks Yennefer once he and her are alone and says: 

“Sure you didn’t go a bit too far?’ he asked coldly. Yennefer’s eyes flared violet.”

“Don’t try to make a fool out of me. Did you think I don’t know about you and her?’

‘If that’s what you—’

‘That’s precisely what,’ she said, cutting him off. ‘Don’t make stupid faces, and refrain from comments. And above all, don’t try to lie to me. I’ve known Triss longer than I’ve known you. We like each other. We understand each other wonderfully and will always do so, irrespective of various minor… incidents. Just then it seemed to me she had some doubts. So I put her right, and that’s that. Let’s not discuss it any further.”

So underneath this exterior, there’s definitely some tension and we see Yennefer’s possessive side come out. Needless to say, Triss isn’t going anywhere near Geralt romantically while Yennefer is in the picture. However, it is important to note that Yennefer still highly values Triss’ friendship, going so far as to daydream about her being in their lives if Yennefer and Geralt were to ever retire. 

Then, during the coup on Thanned, Geralt’s leg is horribly injured and Triss is the one who saves him (although she did help cause the coup in the first place). From Time of Contempt: 

Now Geralt could see nothing and hear nothing. He was sinking, submerging into something warm. He thought Vilgefortz had gone. He was astonished, then, when a fierce blow from the iron staff struck his thigh, smashing the shaft of his femur.

If anything occurred after that, he did not remember it.

‘Hang in there, Geralt. Don’t give up,’ repeated Triss Merigold endlessly. ‘Hang in there. Don’t die… Please don’t die…’

‘Ciri…’

‘Don’t talk. I’ll soon get you out of here. Hold on… Damn I’m too weak, by the gods…’

‘Yennefer… I have to—’

‘You don’t have to do anything! You can’t do anything! Hang in there. Don’t give up… Don’t faint… Don’t die, please…’

She dragged him across the floor, which was littered with bodies. He saw his chest and belly covered in blood, which was streaming from his nose. He saw his leg. It was twisted at a strange angle and seemed much shorter than the intact one. He didn’t feel any pain. He felt cold. His entire body was cold, numb and foreign. He wanted to puke.

‘Hold on, Geralt. Help is coming from Aretuza. It’ll soon be here…’

Triss basically drags Geralt to Tissaia and begs for help. Tissaia reluctantly gives help and Triss teleports Geralt from Thanned to Brokilon to be healed by the dryads and tells only Dandelion where he is and keeps Geralt’s location a secret. Both Yennefer and Ciri are missing after the coup. 

However, once Triss fully commits herself to the Lodge of Sorceresses, she puts  their well-being above all her previous connections. In The Tower of Swallows, she is even willing to let Geralt die as he didn’t serve the purposes of the Lodge:

“The information,” Yennefer said dully, “for his life. Save him, Philippa.”

“No, Yennefer.”

“Because it's not in the interest of the Lodge.” A purple fire kindled in the sorceress’ eyes. “Did you hear that Triss? There, you have your Lodge. You see their true colors, their true interests. And what do you think of them? You were a mentor to the girl, almost – as you put it – a big sister. And Geralt…”

“Do not attack Triss’ relationships, Yennefer.” Philippa retaliated with her own fire in her eyes. “We will find and rescue the girl without your help. And if you succeed, that's fine, a thousand thanks, because you will have saved us the trouble. You tear the girl out of the hands of Vilgefortz and we will be happy. And Geralt? Who cares about Geralt?”

“Did you hear that, Triss?”

“Forgive me,” said Triss Merigold dully. “Forgive me, Yennefer.”

“Oh, no, Triss. Never.”

While Triss takes many steps to try and find and save Ciri, she does nothing of the sort for Geralt and it appears that she has abandoned much of their friendship (and Yennefer’s) in favor of The Lodge. Despite this, Triss still showcases jealously whenever someone else mentions being involved with Geralt. 

For example, in Lady of the Lake, Fringilla is summarizing her seduction of Geralt and his responses and says: 

“December came,” she continued. “Then Yule, then the New Year. The witcher calmed down to the point where Ciri’s name no longer showed up in every conversation. The monster hunting expeditions, which he regularly undertook, seemed to completely avail him. Well, maybe not completely…”

She trailed off. She thought she had seen Triss Merigold’s blue eyes flash with hatred. But perhaps it had just been a reflection of the flickering candle flames. 

Seeing The Lodge like this is a turning point for Triss and she regrets joining The Lodge and her actions in The Tower of Swallows and says as much to Nenneke in Lady of the Lake:

“I cannot go madly hurrying after Ciri to help her, I cannot run like crazy to save Geralt and Yennefer. Not only that, there is a war, which you have sent your girls… A war, that Jarre fled to and I am refused the possibility to even stand on a hill. To once again stand on a hill. Knowing this time, I’d made the right decision.”

“Everyone has their decisions and everyone has their hills, Triss,” the priestess said quietly. “Everyone. You cannot escape your own.”

This arc of jealously, betrayal, and love comes to a head when Triss accompanies Ciri and Yennefer to Rivia to try and rescue Geralt from an uprising. Yennefer rounds on Triss and the two of them have an absolutely vitriolic fight. From Lady of the Lake: 

Triss averted her face, determined not to give Yennefer any excuse. She did not expect it to work. For a long time she had been sensing Yennefer’s anger and aggression growing stronger as they approached Rivia.

“You, Triss,” Yennefer mischievously insisted, “do not blush, do not sigh, do not drool or wiggle around in your saddle. Or is it that you think because I agreed to your request that I want to have you with us? That I was interested in seeing you spend a meeting with an old love? Ciri, I asked you to go on ahead. The two of us need to talk!”

“It is not a discussion, it is a lecture.” Ciri dared to argue, but under the threatening glare from violet eyes, she immediately recoiled, clucked and galloped off on Kelpie on the road ahead.

“You’re not going to meet a loved one, Triss,” Yennefer continued. “I am not so noble or stupid enough to give you the opportunity, or him the temptation. But just for today. I could not deny myself the sweet satisfaction. He will know what role you play as a member of the Lodge. He will thank you for that with his famous look. And I’ll be looking at your quivering lips and trembling hands, I will listen to your lame apologies and excuses. And you know what, Triss? I will faint with delight.”

“I knew,” Triss grunted. “That you would not forget, that you would take your revenge. I agreed to this, because I was actually at fault. But one thing I must tell you, Yennefer. Do not count too much on fainting. He knows how to forgive.

“He knows what was done to him, of course,” Yennefer narrowed her eyes. “But he will never forgive you for what was done to Ciri. And me.”

“It is possible,” Triss swallowed. “He may not forgive. Especially if you insist. But he won’t fly into a rage. He won’t lower himself like that.”

“Yennefer flicked her horse with her whip in anger. The animal whinnied and leapt and the sorceress swayed in her saddle.

“Enough talk,” she snapped. “More humility, you smug viper! He is my man, mine and only mine! Do you understand? You have to stop talking about him, to stop thinking about him, you have to stop admiring his noble character… As of right now, right now! Oh I want to grab you by your matted red hair…

“Try it!” Screamed Triss. “Just try it, you vindictive bitch and I’ll scratch out your eyes! I…”

The both fell silent when they saw the cloud of dust as Ciri galloped back towards them.

That fight was particularly ugly and it’s built out of a lot of repressed feelings and betrayal over the course of the story that these two refused to properly address. However, the two of them put this aside in order to work together and fight together in the end of Lady of the Lake, but this post is not for analyzing Yennefer and Triss’ relationship so I won’t link the quote. 

TLDR: At the end of the day, Triss and Geralt have a clearly described mutual attraction to each other through all the books. However, Geralt’s attraction to Triss does not compare to his love for Yennefer and as such, despite Triss and Geralt sleeping together once, they set boundaries and relegate each other to friends. Geralt never fully stops being slightly drawn to and sympathetic towards Triss and Triss never fully falls out of love with Geralt.  

#holy shit this post turned out ridiculously long #so kudos to anyone who makes it through the end #also now I want to do analyses for all the characters' various relationships like Yennefer and Triss #the witcher #meta #triss Merigold #geralt #triss #the witcher books #Andrzej Sapkowski #the time of contempt #the tower of swallows #baptism of fire #blood of elves #the lady of the lake #myposts #wtf series

[forevercloudnine]

pre-new 52 scarebat ship meme

 (I actually have no idea what to call this period of comics. The dc wiki calls this the “New Earth” universe... it’s like, everything after Jason Todd was retconned out of being a circus acrobat up to Flashpoint. Anyway like a month ago I asked @heroes-etc​ to send me questions for this version of scarebat from this ship meme but then forgot that I did it because I got distracted by other ships. Sorry Jonathan...)

4. Who can’t keep their hands to themselves?

Bruce does DO physical affection — I mean, how many comic panels do we even have of him making out with Catwoman on rooftops — but he’s not especially forthcoming with it. I don’t think it’s an exaggeration to say that his love interests are more likely to instigate contact than he is, especially when that love interest is a villain like Selina or Talia (can you even IMAGINE him trying to take them off guard in a fight by grabbing their face for a kiss? Because I cannot).

He does occasionally instigate affection with his children/proteges, though usually it’s in instances where they obviously need comfort. Bruce isn’t always great at handling complicated emotional situations, but grief and trauma is something he understands very intimately, and he never hesitates to physically reassure people who are in that kind of pain.

In situations where someone isn’t in the active process of being traumatized, he’s less forward with physical affection. That doesn’t necessarily mean he’ll reject it if it’s instigated — depending on who you are, of course. I’m guessing he wouldn’t put up with hugs from random members of the Justice League. Superman is his best friend and he would probably try to wiggle out of 90% of Kal hugs if doing so was physically possible. Most of his loved ones don’t really spring physical affection on him unless they need it or it’s an especially emotional moment, however. It’s not really Bruce’s primary love language. 

Jonathan seems even less physically affectionate than Bruce, though obviously doesn’t have a lot of opportunity to demonstrate how he feels either way. Master of Fear offers the only example of him expressing explicitly romantic affection that I know of (unless you count his terrorizing Becky Albright in New Year’s Evil as physical affection, which... might be how he’s thinking of it...?), and it’s entirely instigated by Sherry Squire. He does ask her to the Halloween party, but she’s the one who takes him down to the furnace room for some “one-on-one” time and tells him to kiss her. 

He also notably does not actually get a chance to kiss her, mainly because the whole thing was a prank meant to humiliate him. This might be why he doesn’t try to instigate anything similar with his next crush, Dr. Linda Friitawa (again, unless you count Becky Albright, but I can’t find New Year’s Evil to read anywhere so my only knowledge of his interaction with her comes from Tumblr. I’m like 80% sure he was supposed to be interested in her romantically, but asking someone to do supervillainy with you isn’t the most direct way to express attraction, so I’m taking that as more obliqueness from Jonathan).

He never expresses any direct romantic interest in Linda, but at the very least he clearly cares about her more than he cares for most people, since he, like. Defends her in conversation and apologizes to her for things that aren’t even his fault. Which means a lot, coming from a sociopath with no regard for human life. They do hold hands at one point, but Linda reaches out to him first, and he waits to see if she’s going to back away from his reciprocated touch before he reaches for her other hand. 

He never instigates anything further with her, possibly out of fear of rejection. Unfortunately, it turns out that this was a good call, because Linda was only pretending to be nice to him while Penguin was paying her to experiment on Jonathan without his knowledge. When Batman figures out what they’re doing, she immediately fucks off and starts dating Black Mask.

Even more unfortunately, his 45 seconds of hand holding with Backstabby McMad Scientist is probably the only mutual physical affection Jonathan has ever experienced in his entire life, so honestly I have no idea if he would be more into it as a concept if it was offered to him more often. He’s clearly willing to return physical contact when it’s initiated by someone else, so maybe it is something he would seek out in an actual relationship? He DOES get handsy with Bruce when he has Batman tied up sometimes. 

9. What is the most embarrassing thing they have done in front of each other?

Trip out on fear toxin, both of them, hands down. There are few things more embarrassing than, as Jonathan aptly describes it, being “reduced to whimpering quivers” in front of your enemy. Especially an enemy who’s presumably jotting down notes on your worst fears, since Batman/Scarecrow fights tend to just be competitions in who’s more frightening.

11. What do they hide from one another?

I mean, obligatory mention of the fact that Bruce hides things from absolutely everyone (with the possible exception of Alfred, because Bruce trusts him as completely as he is capable of trusting anyone, and also because it’s really hard to hide things from a parent whose involved in every aspect of your life and already knew you before you developed your pathological need to obfuscate your feelings and intentions).

As Wonder Woman pretty aptly describes during the Tower of Babel arc, even Bruce’s closest allies are never going to hear the full story from him. So it’s deeply unlikely he’d ever be 100% truthful with a supervillain, even if they got close AND Jonathan reformed. 

But it’s notable that Jonathan’s fear toxin has actually given him a more honest look into Bruce’s psyche than he would ever purposefully give to people who aren’t close family members. And by “close family members” I again pretty much just mean Alfred. Unfortunately for Bruce, nothing forces emotional transparency like mind altering drugs. Fortunately for Jonathan, nothing forces emotional transparency like mind altering drugs! Not that I’m recommending that anyone drug a romantic partner into being honest with them. But Jonathan is a trained psychiatrist, so I assume his psychological know-how combined with insights gleaned from the dozens of “sessions” he’s had with Batman in the past would leave him more prepared than most to decipher the mystery that is Bruce Wayne. (@heroes-etc: riddler is SEETHING.)

Jonathan meanwhile is more than capable of putting together a clandestine scheme, but in respect to himself he’s actually pretty straightforward. Though his driving motivation in this continuity gets more and more complicated over time, from the early 90’s “I just like fear” to the early 2000’s “my Granny tortured me with birds when I was a child and now I’m obsessed with inspiring the same fear and submission she forced on me onto others,” what doesn’t change is his willingness to monologue about it to anyone who’s listening.

Also, anything that Jonathan is unable or unwilling to go into detail on, Bruce is more than capable of puzzling out himself. In Scarecrow: Year One he successfully tracks down Jonathan’s old home to recover and read through Granny Keeney’s diary, and after Scarecrow’s Master of Fear origin was published, it’s clear that Bruce has done his research on Jonathan’s childhood. There’s even a (presumably unintentionally) hilarious scene where Bruce pauses mid-rescue of a man that Jonathan has kidnapped and traumatized with fear toxin to lecture him on having bullied Jon in high school.

Is this really the time, Bruce???

(@heroes-etc: oh 100% he nailed that timing.)

13. When do they realise they should get together?

Well, circling back to Tower of Babel, it’s revealed when Ra’s al Ghul has Talia steal Bruce’s contingency plans for defeating the Justice League that Bruce has “borrowed” Scarecrow’s fear toxin in case he has to take down Aquaman.

This was back when Scarecrow had a number of different toxins that induced different phobias, or made people hallucinate hyper-specific nightmare scenarios (such as “being eaten alive by roaches from the inside,” for some terrible reason). Batman notes in his contingency files that Scarecrow has already done the work for him; presumably Jonathan had already designed a formula to induce hydrophobia, so all Bruce had to do was steal a vial of it from a crime scene.

(The sentence “Why not make him incapacitate himself... perhaps through fear?” alone is like 90% of why I think these men would get along like burlap on fire if they ever actually cooperated on something. Also, unrelated, but the polaroid of Jonathan he has in the Aquaman file is weirdly adorable.)

Bruce’s plan for Arthur is incredibly effective, and notably also Bruce’s only contingency that isn’t either inherently lethal or a ruthlessly sociopathic betrayal of emotional vulnerabilities that had been revealed to him in trust and friendship (RIP Kyle Rayner).

(Notably, Bruce’s plans for Kyle and several other leaguers directly involve using their worst fears against them, even without a fear toxin conveniently tailored for this purpose. Bruce just really likes using fear as a weapon against people.)

After Tower of Babel, Bruce obviously needed to create new contingencies, since the whole point is that they were secret plans that no one could see coming. In canon, Bruce goes on to create the A.I. satellite Brother Eye for this purpose (which backfires even worse than his first set of contingency plans, because of course it does). But I think an interesting alternative could have been Bruce tapping Jonathan for more toxin strands tailored to taking down the Justice League. If Bruce Wayne offered to pay Scarecrow’s way out of Arkham in order to develop formulas that could neutralize the world’s most powerful superheroes, is there any way that Jonathan would turn him down? I mean, obviously he would plan on betraying Wayne at some point, and Bruce would similarly be working against Jonathan’s best interests. But maybe if they set aside their “who’s scarier” dick measuring contest to work together for once, they could come to recognize their shared passion: scaring the shit of people.

Also, the Jonathan in this continuity really likes books. And you know what’s a reliably sustainable source of books that can’t be confiscated by the authorities? Dating Bruce Wayne. The manor alone probably has an insane amount of rare books that have been hoarded by his family over the years. It’s like a weird reversal of the Beauty and the Beast, where the rude rich guy who gives a library to the love interest he may or may not have technically kidnapped is the pretty one.

21. Where do they get nervous about going with one another?

If they were dating, I’m guessing Jonathan wouldn’t want to go anywhere in public with Bruce at all. Bruce Wayne is a celebrity bachelor, and celebrity bachelors get a lot of attention, and people who take celebrity bachelors off the market get a lot of NEGATIVE attention. The public reaction to Bruce settling into a committed relationship with anyone would be the kind of weirdly resentful gossipy judgement that the girlfriends of famous princes or actors or musicians always get from tabloids and entertainment television, but in Jonathan’s case it would be a million times worse. Not just because he’s a supervillain, because if there’s any town that would expect its most eligible bachelor to eventually date a supervillain, it’s Gotham. But more specifically because “ugly social outcast” is one of Scarecrow’s most enduring character traits. Not exactly the traditional trophy wife. And though Jonathan’s Scarecrow identity seems to distance him from a lot of the shame he suffered growing up, I’m guessing that the kind of spiteful vitriol that would follow him anywhere he accompanied Bruce would at the least bring back some very unwanted memories.

Bruce probably doesn’t have the same discomfort Jonathan would with being seen together in public. He doesn’t care if people think Bruce Wayne is insane or lacking in judgement as long as they don’t think he’s Batman, and I’m sure he’d find a way to spin “dating a man who prefers to dress exclusively in burlap” into something appropriately characteristic of playboy idiocy. But while he'd definitely respect Jonathan's wishes to stay out of the public sphere, he would probably enjoy any opportunity to bring Scarecrow into Gotham high society, since his presence would definitely shake up a party, and Bruce is generally extremely bored at any social event where he doesn’t have anyone to snark with. And with Jonathan’s scathing wit as entertainment, Bruce might one day fulfill Alfred’s wish and actually make it through an intermission sometime.

I’d say that Bruce would be nervous about taking Jonathan out for “field research,” but I’m sure it would be one of Scarecrow’s requirements for any long term collaboration, so it’s something that he would have to get used to pretty quickly. He would probably endeavor to keep Jonathan away from anything that could retrigger his less healthy behaviors. On the other hand, it’s not like Bruce does that for himself, so it stands to reason that he probably wouldn’t be able to successfully control Jonathan in that regard either. 

It doesn’t help that one of Jonathan’s primary motivations in villainy is his childhood, which is... exactly the same thing that Bruce is fixated on. A significant portion of Scarecrow: Year One is the two of them waxing poetic about how similar they are in this regard. 

Relating to this, even though it might be a terrible idea, I don’t think Bruce would be able to resist encouraging Jonathan to reconnect with his mom. Bruce would never recommend for someone like Cassandra to seek out a relationship with her father, but if someone he cares about has a LIVING parent who WASN’T abusive to them? It seems unlikely that Bruce wouldn’t advocate for reconciliation. Jonathan’s dad obviously never cared about the teenage girl he knocked up or their bastard child, but Karen Keeney is a different story. DC Holiday Special ‘09 makes it clear that Jonathan was taken away from her against her will, and she’s spent a significant portion of her life wracked by guilt imagining what the woman who abused her was doing to her son.  

Ultimately she attempts to commit suicide because she feels personally responsible for every terrible thing her son has ever done, which is tragic because really she’s the only member of the Keeney family completely blameless in the creation of the Scarecrow. In Scarecrow: Year One Jonathan clearly resents her for leaving him and moving on to have another baby that she actually did keep, which I would call a really paranoid case of jumping to conclusions if it didn’t seem extremely likely that Granny Keeney told him his mother didn’t want him and left him to be tortured on purpose.

(Side note, it is REALLY weird how young Karen Keeney is depicted in Scarecrow: Year One. At times her son looks older than she is, and it doesn’t help that her second born child is an infant for some reason. Even if Jonathan is only thirty years old here, then unless she had him at younger than fourteen, she should already be in her mid-forties. Why did she only have a second child so late in life? The implication with her abusive husband is that she ended up getting trapped in a bad relationship for survival when her family kicked her out as a teenager for disgracing the family by having Jonathan. It would make way more sense for her child with him to be at least in elementary school. Also the scene would have been way more interesting if Scarecrow’s sister was old enough to talk.)

Thankfully Deadman manages to convince Karen to hold on to life long enough for someone to call 911, and she ends up surviving the suicide attempt. But were Jonathan ever to reform, it seems like reconciliation would be really healthy for both of them, since miraculously Karen still seems to care about Jonathan despite everything he’s put her through, and they’re both clearly still suffering from the after effects of Mary Keeney’s abuse. 

Bruce would be enthusiastic about this prospect for obvious reasons, although he would presumably still be nervous about the possibility of everything going terribly wrong. And even if everything went perfectly right, he would STILL be nervous, because everytime Jonathan goes to see his mother there’s a chance that she will mention the time that she kissed Batman full on the mouth. And that is not information you would ever want your psychologist boyfriend to know, unless you want to be mocked with Freudian buzzwords for the rest of your natural life. 

(...This would also count as a thing that Bruce hides from Jonathan.)

#scarebat #jonathan crane #scarecrow #bruce wayne #batman #i just they're neat #it's all about those shared interests #and by shared interests i mean subjugating your enemies through fear #ship meme

[floralcalaveraa]

HEADCANON: The unhealthy feelings towards Lusamine. This headcanon will be based upon observations from the game's dialogue and my own interpretations. If you roleplay any of the mentioned characters, this can be altered, but this is his default canon. The following contains emotional dependency.

                    There is no doubt that Guzma is nothing but loyal towards Lusamine, addressing her as ‘Madam Prez’ throughout the entirety of the game, following her every command, even if it meant going to space. Until he was stranded in Ultra Space with nothing but her insanity, is where his title for her and his loyalty takes pause. In this dark, infinite part of the world, he finds clarity in his emotions; it is an untamable blend of fear and hysteria.

In Ultra Space, Guzma’s English dialogue relies on pauses in the form of ellipsis ( ... ) and commas ( , ) on multiple parts. Usually, these portray either deep thought or caution when speaking. Minus the moment he emphasizes on Lusamine’s lost sanity, which is where we can see how panicked his concern arrives before it resumes its defeated pace, most of his speech ends in trailed silences. 

"I may be the Team Skull boss, and I've never been scared of nothing or nobody, but ..."

"that lady … she's on another level! She's way far gone! She lost her mind over these Ultra Beasts. There's no talking to her, no reasoning with her ... She's just gone..."

In here, Guzma admits how somebody like him, fearless, can come down to see how intimidating Lusamine’s lunacy is. When he confides to Lillie and the player about it being impossible to hold a conversation with the woman, “There's no talking to her, no reasoning with her... She's just gone...", it is clear that he made attempts to derail her from her obsession of this paradise, but his words were powerless against her mentality. Guzma demonstrates compliance to the fact that Lusamine is insane, and seeing her descend to the level she is in makes it one of the scariest exhibitions he has seen in his entire life.

However, Guzma’s Spanish dialogue in the same exact scene carries an entirely different tone and energy. It is the opposite from its English counterpart where he spends a small amount of time being pensive and dedicates more energy into yelling as shown by how often exclamation marks ( ! ) appear. 

Translated from Spanish: “The great Guzma, protagonist of the worst nightmares in the world … has problems sleeping at night because of that lady! I lost my bearings!”

“The only thing that matters to her are the Ultra Beasts … No matter what you say to her, she's not going to listen to you! That woman can't feel anything anymore!”

He is more open about himself to Lillie and the player as he unravels how difficult sleep becomes because of Lusamine, alluding that he has nightmares about her, and how lost and confused he feels at this point in time when he uses the idiom ‘lost my bearings’. Guzma is more loose in his dialogue, that he is opinionated about the one he fears, being able to say that she is emotionless. What remains the same, is how he made efforts to talk to her despite her deranged state. Guzma, at some point, had the strength and courage to speak to Lusamine, if only to make her climb down from her high when he tells them, “No matter what you say to her, she's not going to listen to you!” He wanted to reel back her humanity because her insanity became intolerable and frightful.

Ultra Space, to him, is a place that was imagined from a nightmare.  It is the last place where he follows her, where he last sees and hears from her, where she was tangible for a moment, until she was no more.

In Ultra Sun and Moon, the period where he is stuck in Ultra Space with Lusamine, does not exist. Instead, it is in the Episode Rainbow Rocket where Guzma and Lusamine are last seen interacting, more specifically, Guzma reacting upon the kidnapping of Lusamine. And it is in this chapter where we can see emotional attachment. One of his first dialogues in this phase of the game is him saying how insignificant his worth is without the people that mattered the most around him, specifically Team Skull and Lusamine. This thought is conveyed by an emotional reaction; an angry yell towards two Rocket Grunts who threatened LIllie and the player. His speech is a mixture of shouts and pauses:

"Heh... I gotta admit... You got me all figured out!"

"I got nothin'... Not even my team anymore. I'm just another regular nobody..."

"But! I still got some things I can't let go... Things ain't nobody gonna mess with! And guess what? You punks just messed with one of those things! I can't let that slide..."

Saying that he is worthless because of the absence of those he cares about --in his mind, sources that give him purpose-- shows that he relies on others to build himself, a sign of emotional dependency. Another detail is his volatile reaction upon having the things he cares about threatened, in this case, ‘one of those things’ being Lusamine held hostage by Team Rocket. This quote, alongside the rest of Guzma’s dialogue in this chapter --quotes that center around worrying about the whereabouts of ‘Madam Prez’, continuing on the usage of this title even when the Aether Foundation and Team Skull are no longer associated-- hints at unresolved feelings towards his former authoritative figure, feelings of unable to move forward.

Neither universes give Guzma closure. He is left afraid and emotionally dependent on Lusamine. When she dissociates from her consciousness, Guzma shows fear. When she is absent, Guzma can’t find his purpose.

                    ♡  art by fresias

#‘ THERE'S BEAUTY IN THE BREAKDOWN ( HEADCANONS ) #PHEW! i finally made the post for my lusamine rpers #’but what about pokemon masters where we see guzma talking to lusamine so casually?’ #I had this headcanon in my head for the longest. Even before guzma was in masters #i also don’t want to undermine something so meticulously delivered from the original core game #btw my portrayal takes elements from Both games! If that's okay- #and I do eventually plan on evaluating guzma and lusamines dialogue in masters! #since this headcanon is going to come in two parts: the unhealthy feelings (sun/moon/ultra) and the healthy feelings (masters) towards lusa #because at the core of this blog. Guzma is basically afraid of her but wants her to heal. for them to heal together #even if its scary for him to start somewhere with her #long post #why spanish? its another language i know asides from english-

[lais-a-ramos]

On Lovecraft Country and the way the narrative presents queerness

"No masters or kings when the ritual begins

There is no sweeter innocence than our gentle sin

In the madness and soil of that sad earthly scene

Only then I am human

Only then I am clean"

Hozier, Take Me to Church

oh, boy...

i knew some of these deaths could happen in the finale, but i definetely wasn't prepared for any of this, wow.

i guess that, with the events of the finale, including atticus' death, there really is no point in getting the show renewed for a season 2, as as i hoped and wished before, because all of the conflicts that were set up were resolved. i mean, there's always the possibility of using time-travel to do a retcon and bring all the dead characters back, or, at least, two of the protagonists and the villain, but, maybe it would take too many alterations in the narrative, because it seems like the whole thing was planned for a mini-series.

so, now, all we have left is to do a breakdown of what worked and what didn't in lovecraft country's limited series run.

i think that, overall, the message of black ppl taking back the power of ancestry that was stripped from them by white supremacy and structural racism was well-done, and the symbolism was very well-crafted in the final takedown of the season's main villain, which was a representation of how the racism based on indifference born out of white privilege is almost as bad as the racism based on pure hate and despise, which is a valid message, considering the former is a bystander to the abuses and rise to power of the latter.

although i still find the timing was poorly chosen because, well, as of now, all over the world, it's not white ppl who dub themselves "liberal" or "progressive" and claim themselves to not be racist but refuse to act anti-racist that present an actual threat to our human rights, but literal, actual fascists and neo nazis...there are bigger fish to fry now...

but i digress...

on the final score, i guess that when it comes to queer/LGBTQ+ representation, the show fell actually felt real short for a product that crafted so well the race issues, proving that there is still a lot to go before we get to see intersecting identities being portrayed in media the same compex way they exist in the real world.

no, lovecraft country is not guilty of queerbaiting, unlike some of the same ppl in fandom that are the firsts to either erase the half of a couple that is a BIPOC or to deny a canon cis het biracial ship to hype up a fanon white wlw ship and other problematic stuff plenty of times in LGBTQ+ fandom spaces might say.

but that doesn't mean that the treatment of LGBTQ+ issues was satisfying or can be considered good rep, and it actually repeats some of the same tired tropes about queerness and blackness.

while we can say that the show did a relatively good job with montrose as an individual, the same can't be said of the other characters and the final messages.

like, for example, introducing a trans/non-binary indigenous, the Arawak two-spirt Yahima, only to kill them on the next episode was insensitive, to say the least.

while it's true that misha green apologized for the mistake, and said she and the writers tried to make a point that even oppressed groups are capable of oppression, the final score was that a trans/non-binary character was introduced as a plot-device and brutally murdered before having even a chance to properly develop.

in other words, used as a prop.

in a world in which trans ppl are brutally murdered at alarming rates, and most of the victims are BIPOC trans ppl, that is something that we can't let it slide just because the general message of the show was good for cis het black ppl.

the same can be said on the treatment of sammy in the narrative.

while it's true that montrose being aggressive and acting the way he did, pushing ppl he cared about away and shunning every chance of vulnerability due to internalized homophobia, toxic masculinity and misogyny, as this very interesting critique by amani marie hamed of nerdist pointed out, his characterization nonetheless falls into the same old stereotype in american culture of accusing black ppl of falling behind when it comes to queer acceptance and associating black masculinity with homophobia.

also, the author of the article says it better, but, overall, sammy's existence ends up being just another plot device, serving to say to the audience that the producers and writers know that queer ppl existed in the 50's, but, at the same time, repeating some of the same tropes as usual, like associating being queer with being clandestine and deviant instead of showing it as a natural thing that was perceived as deviant at the time, as we can see by that scene of sammy having a sexual encounter in the alley behind his bar.

the author even mentions that queer ppl overall had houses, and most of the encounters actually happened there, and that scene reinforces the idea that queerness is inherently animalistic.

the article also points out how sammy is mostly there just to be shutted out, first by montrose and latter even atticus, and, ends up being another prop to lift montrose to deuteragonist status, being rejected and abused by montrose solely to highlight tic's father journey with his personal issues that apparently he simply wrapped up in a span of 2 episodes.

the fact that sammy was a also a more feminine gay man, even participating in ball culture as a drag queen, and yet most of his appearences involved him being degraded or shut out or overall mistreated by montrose, even tic, and that scene in which atticus forgives montrose after he revealed he never acted on his homosexuality and cheated on tic's mom, even though it's implied she did cheat on him with his brother george, just reinforces the idea it's ok for black and brown men to be gay, as long as they are not THAT GAY™️.

the introduction of thomas in episode 1x09 only to be murdered in the riots is another example of how queerness seem to come with a price in this show if you act on it.

once again, a gay character was introduced in the narrative to further montrose's pain and trauma.

and his introduction was absolutely not necessary, because being a survivor of a massacre like the tulsa riots and a survivor of parental physical abuse is already was already enough for making tic and the audience begin to emphatize with montrose's pain, there was no need to kill another queer character just for that.

not to say we should agree with everything the nerdist article says, of course.

at times, it felt like the author was saying that addressing these issues in the black community is a problem on itself, and that is definetely not the solution.

but, when we consider the setting of a limited series with a plot-driven approach to the scripts, the way the topic is addressed ends up being superficial and rushed, and what could have been a delicate approach to a complicated man discovering his sexuality if the show was an on-going series, ends up being just a narrative built to put montrose in the spotlight in an attempt of getting a few emmy nominations for outstanding performances, and that's about it.

now, what really serves to cement the LGBTQ+/queer representation in lovecrat country as a disservice is the treatment of ruby, christina and their relationship.

i did a few metas explaining christina's and ruby's characterizations, including one i posted before the finale started explaining why ruby was so important to queer black and feminine-aligned nbs being a dark-skinned fat black queer woman discovering her sexuality and figuring out there was more to life than the social roles that were pushed into her, and how the parallels between her and christina, two different women separated by race and class but with the common feeling of being interrupted by social restraints that binded them, were a way for a character like ruby to be treated by the narrative the same way white women get to be treated in fantasy stories, as someone worthy of being courted and romanced as a light-skinned and thin black woman like her sister leti.

but with that finale, and the way the whole thing played out, with not only christina and ruby dead, but also with christina killing ruby, felt, ironically, like the very same trope that's been the norm for queer characters for a long time.

if we consider the tropes of the genre the show and the source material draw inspiration from, pulp fiction magazines, a medium that was very popular until the rise of the cinema and TV in the 50's and 60's that also served as an inspiration for them, then we know that in this medium some of the harmful tropes about queerness that exist until this day were particularly prevalent, including that of the queercoded villains.

to talk about this, i'm going to refer to this amazing article by tricia ennis on the history of queercoding for syfy wire.

first, a definition:

"queer coding, much as the name suggests, refers to a process by which characters in a piece of fictional media seem — or code — queer. this is usually determined by a series of characteristics that are traditionally associated with queerness, such as more effeminate presentations by male characters or more masculine ones from female characters. these characters seem somehow less than straight, and so we associate those characters with queerness — even if their sexual orientation is never a part of their story."

between the hays code in cinema going from 1934 to 1968, the comics code authority in the comics industry from 1954 to the early 21st century (with dc comics and archie comics being the last to break with it in 2011, mind you), the code of practices for television broadcasting from 1952 to 1983 and its predecessor for radio NAB code of ethics, the authors all over mass media couldn't approach the topic of queerness and portray openly and proud queer characters under the risk of being persecuted by the censors, and so, begin to hide queer chracters under the disguise of subtext.

and given the content creators couldn't show any form of positive queer/LGBTQ+ representation under the risk of being punished by the censors, the alternative they found was to portray the queer characters as the villains or antagonists or degenerates, and punish them with death.

the syfy wire article says it better than i ever could:

"even dangerous LGBTQ tropes rose out of this time period, as the depictions of pulp noir femme fatales and other deadly women rose in popularity. these women were usually written as promiscuous and sexually devious, both with men and sometimes with women. they were also evil and usually met their end as a result of their sins. While depictions of LGBTQ characters were frowned upon, depictions of them in this specifically negative light were not. you were not endorsing an “alternative lifestyle” if your gay characters always met an untimely demise. Instead, they were merely paying for their poor choices. this trope would eventually give way to what we now refer to as 'Bury Your Gays.' "

and the thing is, all those censorship laws are over by now, but the tropes/clichés that arised on that era are still prevalent in pop culture 'till this day, consumed by the audiences and reproduced by content creators, in the industry or in fan spaces, whether they are aware of said trope/clichés or not.

now, that is where ruby, christina and their affair on the show enter.

to explain how problematic and harmful the way these characters have been portrayed is, and what kind of message it sends about black queerness, i first have to explain christina's function on the story.

christina, as a character, was basically the texbook pulp noir femme-fatale, checking most of the boxes of the tv tropes description of the trope, from the "red equals evil and sin" imagery to being a wild card, that character who changes sides according to their own desires and individualistic goals.

in her specific case, helping the white supremacists and the black heroes alike in her pursue for unlimited power to protect herself from the oppression that comes with being a white woman, particularly a wealthy one, in which the very same presumption of innocence that gives them privilege over BIPOC is used to infantilize them and strip them from their agency, putting their bodies and choices under the tutelage of cis het white men.

so, her function on the show was basically to manipulate the characters on the two sides alike.

and that is where the problems in queer representation come in, because, to manipulate them, she acts as a sensual seductress.

and what does the script uses to highlight that this is a character willing to go to the most immoral places to achieve her goals? it makes christina a sexually fluid and gender fluid character.

that is basically playing a move straight from the hays code era.

not only does the show plays christina's sexual and gender fluidity as her being "freaky" and a proof of her deviant nature, but it makes her seduction of ruby as a central part of the scheme that positions her as the main villain of the show.

this portrayal of christina as a textbook femme-fatale with a touch of white feminism is already very problematic on its own, especially when we consider her death and how brutal it was, because, yes, while it's true she is privileged because she is white and wealthy, she is still a woman and a queer one at that, and giving her the same traditional treatment for femme-fatales in pulp fiction ends up reinforcing harmful stereotypes about gender and sexuality.

but, when we consider what it means for ruby as a character, it gets WAY worse.

ruby is a character that's been shown to feel very frustrated about the ways in which societal structures of power interfere in her life, not only on a professional level, but even on a personal level as well, making her feel "interrupted".

dealing with the same issues that all black women and feminine-aligned nbs who don't fit into the eurocentric standards of femininity and of beauty do, and not matching the criteria for being hypersexualized by society as the black women considered conventionally pretty -- with thin bodies like the white women or hourglass body frames, being light-skinned and so on --, ruby has her humanity stripped from her because everyone expects her to be stronger than it's humanly possible.

everyone seems to expect something of her at home, her younger sister took advantage of her money for years, and not only all of her goals in the professional realm seem to be frustrated by social structures of oppression, but even her relationship goals as well, given that most of the men that she gets involved with, whether they are black or white, seem to believe they have the right to abandon her and treat her like trash because she doesn't feel a thing and is "strong" enough.

ruby feels frustrated and tired, and she has every single right to do so, because, as what happens to most black women and feminine-aligned nbs, she is disrespected and disregarded by everyone, white and black alike.

so, when christina comes in with an offer of improving ruby's life with magic, of course she takes the opportunity.

and it seemed like the show was willing to deal with the moral complexities of christina's shapeshifting potion and validating ruby's feelings, or at least, sort of validating.

but, by killing her at the end, it just played out as if ruby's feelings meant she was merely a traitor to the race, and not a woman who was tired of feeling frustrated with all of these impossible obstacles society sets for black women and feminine-aligned nbs, especially dark-skinned and fat ones like her, and justified in her anger and frustration.

she did everything right and accomplished nothing, and, when she finally decided to rebel and focus on herself for a change, she met her demise.

but that is just the tip of iceberg, really.

what makes this situation with ruby so frustrating is the fact that, when the show presented christina's queerness as another sign she was "on the wrong side of the tracks" and a villian that should be defeated by the black heroes, which consist in a family, the narrative is implying that a person has to choose between their queerness, on one side, and their blackness and community on the other.

of course, one might argue that the fact montrose was turned into a gay man himself in the adaptation prevents this from happening. but, when we consider montrose was forgiven by tic only after reinforcing he never did cheated on dora and acted on his queerness and lived his gayness, when he really had every single right to do so, especially because it's implied dora slept with his brother george and the three of them knew she was just montrose's beard, then we have the message that it's ok to be queer as long as you don't act on your queerness at all.

there is a part in the review for nerdist that i mentioned above, in which the author says that one of the book's best qualities was that "the source material also illustrates the importance of family and community ties between Black protagonists", and that the TV show ruins it when it "introduces abuse, alcoholism, and family dysfunction, and strips Black characters of their own magic."

that is a part of the article, published in october 14 2020, that now no longer makes sense after the finale, because that message is there.

but, the actual problem is that the ideas of family and community shouldn't be taken for granted bc they are always under political dispute, and are oftenly used to reinforce backward messages when it comes to gender and sexuality, serving as a tool for the control of the bodies and authonomy of ppl of various marginalized groups and intersecctions, including women, BIPOC and queer ppl alike.

while these things are not inherently good or bad, and they are also part of the culture and identity for plenty of BIPOC ethnical identities, the concepts of family and community are usually weaponized by conservatives and used to justify things like queerphobia and the restrictions over reproductive rights.

queer ppl in all walks of life and skin colors all over the world have to deal with plenty of conflicts about coming out because, by deciding to live their own truth, they can never know for sure whether coming out will put them at odds with their families and community until they dare to do so.

so, ruby's dillemma for not knowing what to choose, her family or a life with christina, plays out as the type of experience queer ppl have to deal on a daily basis, and when we consider the intersection with race/ethnicity, it gets even more cruel because our gender identities and sexual/romantic/aesthetic orientations, that are natural parts of us, make us being invisibilized and silenced in our own cultures and feel like we have to give up on our own communities in order to be able to live our queerness.

there are few things more gut-wrenching than that feeling of fear that you might be disowned by your family and relatives and your community -- whether is it a neighbourhood, a village, a small town etc -- because a part of yourself is considered at odds with your heritage.

and when we consider all the christian imagery in the show, the final result is a really troubling one.

while it's true that being christian and believing in god doesn't authomatically makes anyone a bigot (i actually still retain some of the beliefs i was raised into as a catholic latin-american), it's also true that now, more than ever, we can't ignore science, including history.

the entire way in which they referred to magic as a devil's work was very troubling and evocates the same discriminative rethoric that white european colonizers used to justify the destruction of the ancient old religions and beliefs of BIPOC in their own homeland, the ancient culture of our ancestors, and also the oppression of peasant women in europe.

while we can't generalize, given each culture had its own particularities, there's an agreement in the scientific community that, overall, the cultures of the first nations and indigenous folks from the american continent, the african continent, the asian continent and oceania/pacific islands were far more accepting of different manifestations of queerness.

that means that queerphobia was part of the colonial project, once the traditional family values of christianity were used as a tool for the white colonizers to regulate the bodies and sexuality of the colonized and keep them under control.

and that is why the association of these ideals of family and community as inherent to blackness ends up being problematic, because we can't discuss racism without discussing colonization, and we can't discuss colonization without considering the ways in which queerphobia and religion were used as tools of colonial oppression.

the worst part is that, when it comes to ruby, the producers and writers really didn't need to do kill her at all.

and while the show did right in not showing how christina killed ruby, sparing the audience from watching another black body being brutalized, it's also true they didn't have to kill the character to get her out of the way from the final confrontation between christina and tic's family.

they literally went and changed her background from her book counterpart and made the woman a musician, and a blueswoman at that.

all they needed was to have her share a goodbye scene with christina the same way she had with leti, saying that she wanted to be with christina but couldn't fight her family and friends like that, grab a copy from the safe travel negro guide and set off in a bus to travel all over the U.S., singing very sad blues songs about falling in love with a white devil once.

that's all the producers and writers needed, to use the "sent in a bus" trope.

but the choice was to portray ruby as a character facing the consequences of following her desires , which ends up feeling like a punishment for a dark-skinned and fat queer black woman for daring to question the position society has placed her because of who she is.

this is in no way an attempt to "cancel" the producers or the writers, because a) their work is still important as a team of mostly black creators and b) canceling doesn't seem to have significant consequences, and seems to lead only to more social media wars than anything else.

but now that it finally seems diversity is getting more space in media, this type of discussion gets more important.

there is a slow increase on more representation of queer/LGBTQ+ characters in media and more productions involving queer/LGBTQ+ creatives, but, most of the time, the characters and are white, or, when there are biracial couples, the characters of color are just token minorities, and the same happens with the creatives involved in the production.

there is a slow increase in BIPOC characters representation in media and more productions involving BIPOC as creatives, but, most of the time, the characters are cis heterosexual, and the same happens with the creatives involved in the production.

but, for pop culture and media to be truly diverse, there has to be more space for the narratives of ppl that exist and belong to the two groups to raise our voices and be heard, whether is it in the entertainment industry, society at large or even in fandom spaces.

because she shouldn't be forced to pick between one identity over the other.

our existences shouldn't be interrupted just because society doesn't know how to deal with them.

and if that make us sinners, then so be it.

#lovecraft country #ruby baptiste #christina braithwhite #ruby x christina #rubtina #rutina #montrose freeman #lgbtqiap+ #lgbtq representation #queer representation #poc representation #woc representation #moc representation #black women representation #representation in media #representation in fiction #tv representation #it's ok for non-BIPOC queer folks to reblog #and it's ok for non-queer BIPOC folks to reblog