But how can you avoid that? Does forgetting means forgiving? And it’s not only the flashbacks but it’s the anxiety and the stress that these bring. They aren’t real anymore and they don’t happen but deep down you are so scarred by them that you can’t help it but feel that way.
hahaha i’m so damn shy and i can’t look strangers in the eyes when they are obviously looking for eye contact and now i pretend i’m laughing but actually i would like to reciprocate eye contact, only at the moment it feels as if that is connected with the greatest fear, i don’t even know what exactly, but at the moment i feel pure fear and that’s why people have always said i come across as aloof or even rude when i’m just afraid of social interaction ya feel me
omg today i went to a nutritionist for the first time ever and she asked me if thought i had depression or anxiety and i just COULDN’T explain why i think so. she also said i’m almost underwheight so byeee
No soporto el pasar del tiempo, solo despierto para esperar la noche.
— De los errores se aprende.
— Equivocarse esta bien.
Parecen ser mis frases 2021.
Fıck .. I wanna be like them.. damn it hurts..
this hit hard
this morning i woke up feeling super anxious. i’m not even sure why, but i think it had something to do with the dreams i had (which sounds a little silly). regardless, i forced myself to get up. i got ready and listened to my anti-anxiety playlist (it’s mostly ariana grande).
then i did a guided meditation and tarot reading, which is where things really turned around! i meditated with my peach selenite egg (she’s a beauty) and my tarot reading was actually wonderful. i’ve been struggling a lot with anxiety (my whole life, but especially now lol) and i think i’m due for another spiritual awakening. i did some self-love journaling and almost cried from how happy i felt.
i’m immensely grateful to have turned my day around so quickly. i’m bursting with gratitude and joy. i truly feel like a new spiritual journey is beginning and i’m so excited to see how things go.
thank you for reading this. i’m sending you all love and light 💗✨
I wasn’t sure about posting this but I have been wanting to talk about Adachi and him having social anxiety for months now so this is my trying.
Ever since the first episode I felt a strong affection and comprehension towards Adachi, firstly because of him being relatable but also because he is such a sweet loving guy that gives me hope to become braver.
His story is such a heartwarming story that I am sure makes a lot of us happy but that also might remind some of us of our own fears.
Which is why I wanted to talk about how much Adachi’s story means to me, firstly I wanted to say that even thought there is a not comfirmation about Adachi having social anxiety, there is a lot of points of why I believe he does have it.
Sypmtons of having social anxiety include:
•Fear of speaking in public
• Avoiding making eye contact
• Avoiding starting conversations
• A constant fear of social situations due to fear of humiliation or embarrassment
•Feeling anxious or panicky before a social interaction
• Anxiety that disrupts daily living
Apart from this he also has a low-self steem and struggles with self deprecation just like many others that have social anxiety.
Self deprecation is a theme that Cherry Magic has honestly handle so well, is not a common subjet that you see in media and when you do see it is never taken seriously but in Cherry Magic this is not the case at all.
Cherry Magic shows how horrible self deprecation can be for someone and the auto-destructive path that can follow if we never deal with it.
Being able to see Adachi’s thoughts give us a more internal view of how the character feels that make us understand why he acts the way he does, because we can see that is something he has been dealing with and repressing ever since the first episode.
We saw how his anxiety, fear, insecurity and self-hatred took control over him and make him explote and hurt the person he loved the most.
This could happen to everyone but for the ones with social anxiety, this feels more like a never ending situation, something that we cannot avoid even if we wanted to.
Cherry Magic shows this, shows how terrible really that can be because even thought Adachi could recognize at the end how loved he was by so many and how worthy he was of love, it also shows the other side of what happens if we are not brave enough to see it and take action about it.
Is not easy, is definitly not easy, is not something that happens overnight, is something that takes time, something that we need to work on stronger than anyone else.
Having confidence, security, trust and love in ourselves after so man years of being unable to have it, is something that would take time but at the end would be totally worthy.
Hope for things getting better, for us feeling better, hope I think is what could connect so many of us to cherry magic, that show give us a total feeling of hope and stability that sometimes we cannot get from anything else.
Is a good feeling show, with sweet characters that can make us feel instantly good even in our worst days.
Cherry Magic might even feel like therapy some days but in some way it kind is therapy.
Despite Cherry Magic having a happy ending, it doesn’t tell us that now everything is right or perfect because Adachi is still who he used to be shy and insecure, the difference is that he is less shy and insecure, he has become more bold and confident, he now believes in himself and is more in touch with his feelings but all the other aspects are still there.
Because that is how life is in reality, a palete of color with different shades, some days are more colorful than others and that is totally fine as long as we stay true to who we really are.
This doesn’t mean that Adachi would always feel insecure, it means that he would always be him in some way or another because all our defaults are part of who we are and being able to recognize this is the first step we need to do to start accepting ourselves.
That is what Adachi did at the end, he accepted himself and that gave him the strenght he needed to be brave and follow his heart.
But that didn’t erase his anxiety, he was just able to not let it take control over his life anymore, which makes me so proud of him and gives me hope for being able to that one day too.
In conclusion I just wanted to say that this is why his story is so important for so many of us and why need more stories like this, hope you all understood what I tried to say and if anyone want to add something to this post, please feel free to do it!!
Wish that you all are doing great, thanks!!
not really sure what the fuck I’m doing with my life
I saw a scorpion
Under the moon I sat
With thoughts making explosions in my head
And just as I was about to pour it out, I saw a scorpion.
I got scared, very scared.
But just when I flashed light on it, it began to run.
As if it was expecting a sudden death.
But little did it know that it was me who was scared to death.
Even though it was making its way away from me I felt what if it might just turn around all of a sudden, jump on me, bite me and I die.
Well, again as usual I knew I was overthinking.
Overthinking of things that might never happen to me at all.
I realise how the ‘what ifs’ were keeping me away from getting me things that I do want in my life.
How awful it was to think less of myself when I was supposed to give me strength every time I doubted myself and my worth.
How awful it was for me to think I would never cross the bridge of fear that I have built in front of me.
How awful it was to doubt myself in the first place.
love, love, love. what is it good for? absolutely nothing.
i want for you to not care. i want you to hurt me. tell me you hate me, that you never cared to begin with. i just want to know it won’t hurt you when i kill myself.
my interpretation of “i’m not gonna force you to tell me what going on but i’m always here to talk if you need me” is basically people telling me they’re gonna ask what’s wrong bc it’s polite and they feel bad but they don’t really care about what’s wrong and don’t want to hear me talk abt my problems but at their own convenience will let me talk about myself so theh can interject their problems while i talk about mine and look for pity
you’ll never know me.
I’m downing in tears
Can’t stand just shaking
Can’t face my fears
All faults are mine
No choice but to taken in
The words they say to me
The false promises they keep
Their judgmental eyes
I can’t hide from Oh No 😔
I’m just a person
Trying to be who I can be
But they put me down
I shut them off
My tears i wasted on
Please forgive me
The mistakes I never made
But I beg your pardon
For the faults I never made
But let me be who I want to be
They wont stop cursing
I can’t stop shaking
And here it goes again
I’m drowning in tears
People keep asking wear I get a this fake blood for my clothes. Bitch who said it’s fake