#anyway drew this for myself because I Am Still Broken <3

[insertdisc5]

Devlog #3 - Musings About Text Speed

Hello everyone! Welcome to this month’s devlog! This one will be about what I did this month, and also text speed in video games.

Anyway, if you just stumbled upon this, I am Adrienne, also known as insertdisc5! I’m the developer, writer, artist, main programmer, etc of the game. The game being In Stars and Time, which is the next and final game in the START AGAIN series, following START AGAIN: a prologue (available here!).  You can find out more about In Stars and Time here!!! 

ALRIGHT LET’S GET TO IT

I've had quite the productive month, mostly because I took a one week break from my day job to chill and rest and work on the game. Which means…

Act 3-4 is more or less complete and implemented and tested!!! I say "more or less" because I'm still missing a few illustrations, and a few sidequests I'd like to add. BUT!!! The main story for those acts is complete!!! YAHOO!!!

I've also been drawing a bunch, which hasn't happened for a little bit. After months of not drawing, I hung out with a friend and we drew together, which helped me unblock myself art-wise! THANKS, FRIEND!!!!! Anyway here’s one cryptic illustration, just for you guys.

(Siffrin goes ^u^)

I’ve also been playtesting the game from beginning to (temporary) end! I haven’t done that in a while, so it was interesting to play it in its entirety and see what works, what doesn’t (and needs to be fixed), and also the parts that are broken code-wise and I need to jump into and figure out. There’s less of those than I anticipated though, so: YAHOO

I do want it on the record that while playing through I knew what was going to happen (of course I did, I wrote the damn thing), but I did get some very fun moments that made me go “oh god!!!! That’s really good!!!!!! Who wrote this!!!!” I wrote this. It’s always fun to feel surprised by your own work, and it happened a bunch, so I’m very happy!!!

And now it’s on to scripting the few things for Act 3-4 I have left, and then finally jump into scripting for the final acts, Act 5 and 6. I’ve had the base for the events written down for a very long time, as well as countless notes on “ok we GOTTA MAKE SURE that this thing happens”, so it’ll be a matter of sitting down and making sure all those notes become a cool thing. Which it will, because, come on guys (I strike a pose) it’s me.

What else, what else… Oh! Somehow I found myself wondering about text speed this month.

I’ve asked my followers on twitter what text speed they preferred in their games, (buzzfeed voice) AND THE ANSWERS WERE SURPRISING (not really)

A few random ramblings about text and dialogue in video games:

-I found it very interesting that most people set text speed to fast-but-not-instant (FBNI speed!), and that people using instant speed were relatively low. It almost made me wonder if I should just force the player to play the game at FBNI speed (kinda like how Ace Attorney forces you to use one speed), but hey. If I can add options, might as well add them. 

-I did leave instant speed in in ISAT, but it IS kind of sad to see the text appear all at once when I already made sure the text appearing would pause slightly at every comma or end of sentence (see above!) One of my gripes with instant speed is that it sometimes kills the pacing. Can you really feel the WEIGHT of a sentence if it appears all at once?!?! Thankfully, I did find out how to add very slight pauses with the instant speed! Heck yeah! Even at instant speed, you will go at MY pace, player!!!!

-Many people also love when, if your text speed isn’t instant, you can press A while the text is still appearing to make the text appear all at once! Thank god this is already a thing in RPGmaker and I don’t have to figure it out myself. What I DID figure out is how to make this NOT happen, for important moments! Again, you will go at MY pace, player!!! It’s a fun, subtle way to catch the player off guard, so I’m glad I figured it out, teehee.

-One of the reasons I was wondering about text speed is that I’m a very fast reader, and I didn’t really take that into account when I made START AGAIN: a prologue! I had a few dialogues where the text would advance to the next box on its own, without player input, mostly when a character would interrupt another or something like that. Because it’s fun and cool! Haha they interrupted this character so the text box advanced on its own! How realistic! What a good use of video game code powers!

    But here’s the thing: some players (especially streamers, who read everything aloud) did not have time to read what was on screen before it went away! And if they had the text speed on instant, the code made it so that they would get literally one frame of text before it went away! AND THAT’S NOT GOOD!!! So for ISAT, I made sure I would add text that advances automatically VERY rarely, and when I did (because, again, it’s fun and cool), I made sure the text speed would slow down significantly, and the text would stay on screen for as long as it took me to say aloud a few times. So you are welcome, slow readers everywhere. Sorry it took me so long!!!!

That’s it, that’s all for today! Let me know if you have any questions, or if there’s any aspect of the game development struggle you’d like me to talk about! See you next time!!!

AND DON’T FORGET TO WISHLIST THE GAME ON STEAM ALSO IT REALLY HELPS BECAUSE STEAM’S ALGORITHM IS MORE LIKELY TO SHOW OFF GAMES WITH A HIGH AMOUNT OF WISHLISTS THAT'S THE REASON WHY GAME DEVS ALWAYS ASK TO WISHLIST!!! OKAY BYE!!!! 

#start again start again start again #in stars and time #devlog #isat devlog #game development #and also??? #reference

[hospitalterrorizer]

diary195

3/28-29/24

thursday - friday

named yesterday's entry wrong... whoops.

anyway, tomorrow i work for like 8 hours basically, and then the next day too. it sucks a lot, and whatever. i don't think one of the closing people i usually work w/ is gonna be able to come in, i mean, obv not, her hand is broken which is pretty horrifying.

i hope she recovers as necessary. it is weird to me when co-workers would wish for speedy recoveries, i almost did, but it seems like a way of thinking which foregrounds the fact that they need to be able bodied to do tasks and things, to help me or others. it's distantly self interested. i know the broader idea/supposed/assumed thing you communicate is that really you just hope the pain stops soon, i just feel like there's other stuff implicit in that. i hope it stops hurting though. it's awful that it hurts.

it feels awful also, to now talk about how i'm going to work on a song, to get it ready to release like, tonight maybe. that will be fun. i finished the cover and drew some stuff for fun as well. the stuff i drew is basically bad because i was too zoomed out and that made the pen movements translate weird, however maybe that kind of incompetence is cute.

and then there's this other doodle i did while messing w/ something for cover art i screencapped. she's kind of super obscenely ugly in a way but also cute. idk. they're giving 'alien' and 'in pain' which i feel i think. i relate, to the drawing, that i made.

these are my #bad #drawings

here is my human body in photos i took of myself because i am vain and felt good yesterday.

notice ... i cleaned the mirror. wow.

i am feeling cuter lately i think, which makes me happy, or like, on my days off where i go out, i feel really cute, and like i need to be, because i am working now there's this wider variance between ways i might be seen and stuff. so it's this really pathetic need to be cute/pretty/sexy, that emerges, when i'm not working. but at least i am feeling that way.

i also like how bad i am at posing. it's funny to post photos of me trying to do...whatever it is i am doing. i'd rather expose myself like that, it's sort of like i'm living for the failure of affecting something, which is maybe cuter than actually being effortlessly anything. the evident effort and the failure. it's at least kind of 'kawaii'.

the reading today was not much, but interesting nonetheless. he gets to an example of an early quarantine, and the methods of observation/surveillance, delivery, and keeping count, an early expression of the relation between medicine and discipline/surveillance.

one thing he also mentions, and this is an interesting theme in the book, is the writing of discipline, and power, the writing, legal code and observation, which create life for power and discipline, and the way discipline observes individuality/individuates first by a process that homogenizes people. this seems counterintuitive but he's just getting at the categories created and the ways we for instance are put into the categories. here is one place i have always felt foucault/implicated him, in particular with my gender and the impossibility of placing myself, i do not like the idea of making myself visible in the writing of power, or visible to power by writing myself in its tongue. however in many ways i sort of do. i try to look girly and stuff, i post pictures of myself. i am visible. but i am still trying to be noncompliant. i want to be noncompliant. but one noncompliance is easily absorbed into another category, take for instance a diagnosis like 'oppositional defiant disorder', or simply 'noncompliant,' or even 'truant'. i would like to be truant but really i am some other kind of issue, much smaller than even a single truant child. sad.

he also points to the early developments of examinations, medical or otherwise, mechanisms for discipline, things he looks at in his book, as ignoble sciences which, undervalued / unexamined, have enabled the uncritical birth of the sciences of the man/human.

another thing he gets at that i feel is very very very important is how the good subject is individualized:

"and when one wishes to individualize the healthy, normal and law abiding citizen, it is always by asking him how much of the child he has in him, what secret madness lies within him, what fundamental crime he has dreamt of committing" ( pp. 193, discipline and punish, michel foucault (when i do quote should i do pages/authors and stuff? if i am pulling from a real book yes probably. (real as in, in my hands, for reference later perhaps, for myself)))

this point here gets to something very interesting that i think about at times, perhaps controversial but the propensity (i am not above this) to self diagnose, seek out some kind of medicalization, this sort of thing in people, is very interesting. i don't blame anyone because being an individual is constructed as a desirable thing, and this is not the individuality where one's being and life day to day is left alone, not looked at/written, but instead the lives we lead are subject to observation, from inside ourselves and especially from the outside, appraisal, and so one. we do not know who watches but we are watched, and so this means, needing to be individual, but many of the individuations we see are related to things which, in the past, were treated as issues, they are now things that might be 'rewarded' as in with attention/sympathy, which is now part of the disciplinary reward system, or i suppose it always was, to have some portion of the sovereign will of crime or that which is a difficulty in some way, some portion of you which might become special and useful in another way. it can always be turned to use.

however this isn't what i was thinking, the use stuff, it is just true, just that it's interesting that this is something one might be able to see going farther back, and that it would blossom into what we see now.

and it's uploaded!!!

i'll put it on tumblr in a regular way tomorrow or ssomething, with tags and stuff

there's like a weird popping sound. maybe i can like, fix that, or something, before anyone even gets to hear it. let me see, #lol.

omg... ableton is being so annoyingggg.

okey:

and here's a hi res version of the cover art, that i have slaved over, and is only okay:

the photos of the mascara/eyeliner running onto tissues are from me, i did makeup and poured water on my face to make it run like i had been crying, and that picture at the top is me attacking a broken imac. and then there's the little drawings and then a photo i found of a woman's lace collection.

anyway, i need to sleep now, so

byebye!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

#SoundCloud

[takaraphoenix]

If you really meant it... *blinking up from under her eyelashes* May I get a nice little Drew/Percy/Nico and something with snow, or cold outside, warm inside - something cozy and wintery? 🥺 Thank you, my dear 💙

I hope this brightens your day some, dear <3

--

Percy wasn't even entirely sure how he had ended up in this whole situation. There'd been activity in the mountains, they'd sent a regular quest of kids and the kids had gotten home, nearly frozen solid and hurt. Which was the point where Percy insisted on sending in veterans.

Because Percy was now working as a counselor at camp and he wanted to make sure that the young kids wouldn't get traumatized too much. However, most other adult demigods were either at home or at college; enjoying the perks of New Rome and the more normal life that offered.

So there hadn't been many others to pick from. First to volunteer had been Nico, which was a bit of a surprise. The even bigger surprise was his other volunteer though.Drew Tanaka, who really wasn't a fan of going on quests. At all. But after Nico had volunteered to go, she had too. And then there had been a whole lot of glaring between the two alphas. And Percy meant a lot.

And that wasn't even the worse yet. What they had encountered was some kind of shadow-eater – name still pending. That was why the other demigods had been so drained, because leeching off their shadows affected their lie-force. The problem was that Nico had a much stronger connection to shadows, so this affected him even more than Drew and Percy and Percy had been too busy trying to battle the elements. Sure, he controlled water and snow was technically frozen water, but snow was also snow. It's own thing. So harder to control for Percy. The only logical next step was a tactical retreat and regroup. They were in the mountains and it was deep winter, snow everywhere. So they needed shelter too. Shelter had come in the form of a cabin they'd broken into. The snow storm had only picked up ever since. And, worse of all – for Percy, anyway – was the fact that he was stuck here with two alphas he really, really liked.

“Percy, why are you pacing like that?” Drew asked, frustrated. “This won't help.”

“Well, it helps me,” Percy glared at her, baring his fangs just a little bit. “I don't like being cooped up. I don't like sitting still. And I especially don't like not knowing what we're battling.”

“Once I'm recharged enough, I'll shadow-travel us back to camp and we can tell Chiron all we know so he can help us figure out how to fight this. We'll just have to wait out here.”

Grumbling to himself, Percy turned to face the two alphas. He'd had a crush on Drew for years, he used to spend so much time at Aphrodite Cabin because of Silena. And Nico. Maybe because or when Nico had confessed having a crush on him? It had kicked something loose that made Percy reconsider every single interaction they'd like ever had. So. Here Percy was, with his two crushes.

“Percy. Will you stop fidgeting too?” Nico asked this time, watching him closely.

“I will not,” Percy glowered at him and continued fidgeting with the pillows and blankets.

“What...” Drew trailed off, her eyes widening in realization. “Wait, are you building a nest?”

“Don't judge me,” Percy glared and pouted at the same time. “I'm in a foreign territory that I don't know, so I'm trying to comfort myself. You two aren't helping.”

That gave both Nico and Drew pause, making them look at each other. “What?”

“You and your... your... hostility! The constant glaring and I don't even know why! This is just making me feel even more cage-y and frustrated, you know.”

And again, Nico and Drew looked at each other, with doubt and confusion. The looks changed. Like they were holding a whole conversation without speaking. Which only irritated Percy further and made him build his nest a little more aggressively. Nico growled and Drew made a snarling sound.

“Enough with that,” Percy put as much authority into it as he could. “I am ordering you two to a cease fire while we're stuck in here. Don't look at me like that, yes, order. I am the Omega of camp, and the leader of this mission so you two will damn well be civil and listen to me.”

Well, now he had both alphas' attention and they were both staring at him with... something. Percy couldn't pinpoint it, but it definitely made him a bit uncomfortable. Not really in a bad way though.

“We're not at war, we don't need a cease fire,” Drew heaved a sigh and crossed her arms. “We are... in a healthy competition. Completely normal for two alphas. Who like the same omega.”

“...Huh?” Percy paused in his nesting to stare at them both in confused. “This is about a guy?”

“This is about you,” Drew offered a dramatic sigh. “You're the omega we like. How are you this pretty and yet this dense about it? You're usually very bright, but when it comes to people being romantically or sexually interested in you it's like you wear earplugs and a blindfold.” Drew paused for a moment. “Well, that'd actually look very good on you.”

Still in the middle of trying to process this all, Percy stared at her. And blushed horribly. What?

“I had a crush on you. I just... didn't stop,” Nico looked as flustered as Percy felt. “I tried getting over you, but it proved impossible. And then there was Drew... also liking you.”

“Huh...” Percy blinked repeatedly, looking from one to the other. “I didn't think either of you liked me. I mean. Like that. And now you're telling me both of you like me? What... do I do with that?”

At least now Nico and Drew looked as lost as he felt. “We kind of assumed... choose one.”

“I don't like choosing,” Percy wiggled his nose cutely. “And... I like you both.”

“Well then,” Drew looked incredibly pleased as she walked over to Percy. “Don't choose. I don't mind. As long as you're mine, I wouldn't mind you being his too. What? Polyamory isn't a new concept. Especially not for a daughter of Aphrodite, hello?”

Oh. That was an option? Huh. Percy stared doe-eyed from Drew to Nico, trying to see what he thought. Nico also walked over to Percy, until the alphas came to sit on either side of him.

“Can... we help with this?” Nico's voice was soft, his hand resting on the pillow that was still in Percy's lap. “With this nesting? Or your irritation? Or anything?”

“I mean. I would accept kisses and also cuddling. It soothes me, I'm a physical person.”

The nest moment, he could feel kisses being pressed to both his cheeks and then they all settled in together. The nest he had built was nice and comfortable, since the little cabin had provided much warm bedding that he ended up using. The bed itself was comfortable and large enough. Well, a bit of a tight fit for three, but then that made it perfect, in Percy's opportunity. Because it meant more cuddling. With Drew on one side and Nico (though he looked more begrudging than Drew) on the other side. That wasn't something Percy had even considered as an option, to have both.

“You smell content,” Nico whispered pleased, nosing Percy's neck.

Didn't get much more comfortable than in a big bed, with his two alphas holding him. Snow days were nice, he'd always liked the fluff of snow, watching it dance. And that view was even prettier when he got to enjoy it from the warm safety of a bed and two hugs. Purring softly, he rested his head against Drew's chest and let Nico spoon him from behind. Yes. This was definitely nice.

~*~ The End ~*~

#ABOverse #Nicercy #Percy x Drew #PJOverse #Fanfiction #Fluff #Phoe's Tumblr Drabbles

[thepolyamorouspolymath]

You know, I've avoided talking about my brother. Because I still, after years, don't know what to feel.

I want to hate him. Because he abandoned me. Even more because he broke his word in doing so and WE DIDNT DO THAT. We didn't make promises often and we kept them when we did because we'd had so many broken to us, and it broke our hearts just a little more each time -- mine for the world to see, his hidden even from himself. (Some magical powers of denial that one's got, it's beyond human...)

I want to hate him for letting himself fall so far from what I understand. Because he was the Titan of my childhood, the one thing I could count on in a world where nothing, including myself made sense -- even when it was just counting on him to be an ass about who picked the TV show. (Incidentally, our lone agreement on X-Men:The Animated Series in the mid 90s was my bisexuality awakening... I'm sure he'd be thrilled.)

I want to hate him because in that fall he let himself become the worst parts of Dad -- he drank too much, was verbally and emotionally abusive to his wife, and did it in front of his daughter, who can be sensitive, as if having her in therapy would negate that. And after knowing what that toxicity around me, a sensitive kid, had done to break me forever.

I want to hate him.

But I don't.

Because took every hit so I never would. He drew the criticism so I wouldn't. Yeah, he missed a lot of stuff but he was like 10 -- and brave as hell for that. Because he tried so hard to teach me to survive, even though he only knew his way and not mine. Because the last night under the same roof, when he was home from college and he and Dad went at it, and I broke... he's the one that pulled me into the hall, that hugged me, that calmed me down because neither of my parents could be bothered, and reassured me that him not coming back there wouldn't mean losing him, he find a way to still see me on visits home.

Because I remember him crying when selecting flowers for my Dad's funeral despite their history. And pulling it together for the funeral anyway enough to still protect me, keeping my Dad's family away from me so I didn't lose it on them.

Because he took on making sure I got treatment when I had my breakdown.

Because I've heard him have so many mini breakdowns of his own and seen how much hurt he carries and hides.

Because when my lung collapsed he drove for hours during midterms despite needing to study to check on me even though literally everyone told him I was fine.

Because when I was in my first school play in high school he couldn't come because midterms and I was crushed. And on opening night the cast reception was going on, and I was alone, and there appeared his 3 best friends (who were around my house way too much lol) because he'd sent them so I wouldn't be alone.

Because even though he called me "Chubby" as a nickname most of my growing years, when his friend slipped and called me that in public and I went home raging mad and hurt and embarrassed, he never did it again, not even slipped (having a kid who changed their name, it is HARD to never slip up) because he could see it had hurt me badly.

Because he told me I was stronger than him because I could bend and I could hurt and it didn't mean I was weak because I couldn't do his stoic act, because I've always been afraid/hated being weak.

Because he always believed I could be more and better than I am or he is, even if he rarely admitted it.

Because he was still trying to keep guys not good enough away from me when I was 30.

Because every time he makes me cry -- which he sometimes has a knack for -- he always follows me, and hugs me and tries to make it better. And because he's so awkward at it I can't stay mad.

Because he lets me be mad and hold grudges and hate who I hate, even if he doesn't agree.

Because he was always the one I looked up to, and always the one I wanted to make proud.

Because I know why he fell so deep probably better than he does, and I can't be mad at his pain.

Because our brains interface better than anyone on earth -- it's been commented on by more than one person how we get each other's points instinctively, to the extent we don't even need to hear it and how no one else can keep up when we get debating or talking.

I want to hate him. And I want to rail at him for days. And mostly... I just want my brother back. Even the messy fucked up parts. Not because I need saving or a hero, but because I miss him.

The earth is just a degree off its axis without him, and I'm the only one who notices.

#my brother #family issues #its a crying kinda night

[deadgodwriting]

I don’t think I’ve ever really felt love before. I know I told you I had, but I don’t think that’s true. I think that in all honesty I didn’t even know what love really was until feeling it with you. And, I think part of that is that I’ve never felt my love returned until now. I had loved but it never really grew into what it could ultimately become. Love feeling unconditional is so so foreign to me. I’m still having to get over the idea that if I criticize you you’ll lash out at me. It’s part of why I almost never argue back very hard, or if I really want to make a point I like doing it when you’re asleep or after you leave and I can send it in a message. Because in all honesty I am a very broken person at this point lmao. Like there’s no hiding it. I try tip toeing about the fact I’ve been abused a lot but I think at this point it’s just obvious. I’ve been in 5 relationships before you. Each lasting: 1-2 months, almost 2 months, 1 1/2 years, 2-5 months (2 dating, 3 fwb but mixed together), and over 5 years. And that’s only counting ones lasting at least a month. There’s 3 other people I had asked out and agreed but we broke up either after a day, 2 days, or a week. And I started dating at 13. My first kiss on the lips was actually after the first time I had been kissed on the neck to my memory. Part of the reason I don’t like kissing with tongue is it’s just a bad sensory thing and also because I had someone force their tongue in my mouth, like multiple times. That same person was my first kiss. And first groped me. And first kinda *tried* to rape me, but gave up because I looked too terrified. There was two police reports but my parents prevented me from doing anything about it and gaslighted me about it. The second person was violent. One of the first things he did was when I was telling him to stop getting into fights, and not be friends with a guy who stabbed him, etc, he said that i was lucky he loved me or liked me so much (just don’t remember) because if he didn’t he would break my nose for asking all those things of him. He started pressuring me for sex. And then after I still wasn’t willing fast enough he told me he would cheat on me if I didn’t and I think even made me cry about it. So we had sex in a park bathroom like, somewhat shortly after I had turned 14. He also knew about the fact I had just been molested by the other person. So..... that was interesting lol. I also got to have my first pregnancy scare at 14. I had to walk to the local grocery store and buy my own pregnancy tests, and on the way there I was debating whether I would keep it if I was pregnant. I had to use what little cash I had too since I didn’t have an allowance most of my life, just holiday money. My parents found out I was sexually active and put me on birth control shortly after. So. Anyways uhh. He was the same guy that hit me, and like mentally tortured me for fun. To the point I would have full blown panic attacks that then led to shutting down and like rocking in the corner of my closet sometimes without the light even on because I had no more crying left in my body. But the time he hit me uh, basically I was scared of him being violent. And it was his 15th birthday and I was over at his house and he insisted that I go look at his knife collection that I really didn’t want to see because again, scared. But I had to go look and while showing me knives he poked me under the nail with one and I jumped and got scared because it hurt. Not a lot, or drew blood, but I got scared. And he started laughing at me. Which then sent me into a meltdowm/shutdown. I startedd being very quiet and reserved and just scratching at myself like I told you I used to do. Hoping he would notice and try and stop me and comfort me about scaring me but he really didn’t care. And then his parents dropped us off at the movies cause again it was hi sbirthday. And so we sat and I kept being quiet and scratching at myself. And he finally noticed and started telling me to stop and I didn’t because I was panicking. So he stormed out, which then made me panic more because any time he was mad it would be horrible, so I followed. And when we were outside he said he was going to call his dad which I super didn’t want because he made his parents hate me and I knew they wouldn’t let me talk to him for who knows how long, so I took his phone and tucked it in my bra and kept asking him to just go back and watch the movie. But he refused, and started destroying some plants that were planted outside the movie theater. I really didn’t like seeing him hurting the plants so I started telling him to stop, and he didn’t, so I started slapping his arm/hand away when he would try. And then I guess I did it harder at some point and he got pissed and I was sobbing and apologizing and I said he could hit me back, so he slapped me across the face. Which I think made me freeze because I didn’t expect him to actually do it. And then if I remember correctly I think we argued a little more, he got more pissed, shoved his hand down my bra and grabbed his phone, called his dad, and then his dad basically yelled at me while I cried as he drove me home. And then yeah I wasn’t allowed to talk to him for a few days for “ruining his birthday”. Uh, lots of other things wrong with him. That relationship messed me up probably the worst out of any of them. The last time I saw him in person I had such a bad panic attack I literally ran away and had to lock myself somewhere to hide because I was terrified and was shaking violently. Luckily I seem to be doing a lot better because I can like see an old photo of him and not start shaking lol. But when I was talking about like being 14 and drinking gatorade mixed with extract it was because I was with him. I uh also used to self harm a decent amount. I never cut but I would like get a pencil or pen and would just draw a straight line into my skin over and over until I got through the top or more layers of skin. I have some very mild scars on my chest from it. I probably did it a total of like 30 times? Last time being like, last year or maybe earlier this year because it became a coping skill from handling abuse. Which like, my ex wife also was abusive. There were points I genuinely broke down and told her that I felt like I was being held hostage and was in the relationship against my will only because I didn’t have money if I wasn’t with her and I didn’t want to have to get rid of all my animals because I couldn’t pay to feed them. And like sobbed and begged for her to just treat me better or to help me get away from her. And I even told her that sometimes us having sex felt like I was a prostitute or was being raped cause again, I didn’t want to be in the relationship I was only there because I literally had no ability to have money otherwise because I tried holding a very part time (5 hours a week) job and just couldn’t with how sick I am, or can get during a flare up. And also like.... I may have been molested or raped before the age of 2? Complete unknown, because I have no memories, but I had weird behaviors as a kid that looking back like my mom and 1-2 of my therapists have agreed like it’s a possibility for sure? So. Anyways uh. I also wrote my first suicide note when I was like a small kid. Maybe before i entered middle school. It was on purple construction paper and had a little stick figure hanging themselves like if you failed hangman from school lol. I was a very not mentally healthy kid and started therapy and medication at either 13 or 12? And then kept getting worse because even more abuse. And there for a while I was basically just mentally Gone. Like I hallucinated, was delusional, just like mentally Not There. They even thought I had DiD at one point. Because on top of all the abuse was also the like, forced isolation from my parents. So I barely interacted with anyone and if I did it was like one of my significant others who almost always abused me. Or my parents who also abused me. So like my brain started inventing shit To Cope lol. I’m 98% better from all that shit though. Really the main thing is I still sometimes will like feel a bug on my skin that isn’t there or something. Or like I’ve mentioned a couple times I can get really scared at night trying to fall asleep because my brain will come up with images of monsters and give me really bad anxiety about it. And unfortunately the only way I ever found to cope with that is sleeping with someone because idk why but that really calms me down. I still also get like anxiety/ptsd and will easily panic from things or have a hard time trying to speak up about things sometimes. That whole Fear of Abandonment thing which I feel like you also easily get. At least from the times you completely panicked at the thought of me wanting to leave you over something. I get that really easily and also worry like “I’m being annoying, I’m talking too much, I ask for too much, I take up too much space, it’s okay if laying like this is hurting me because it’s annoying to ask to move” like my brain just insists I should make myself as small and as quiet as possible so I’m less of a burden to deal with. And I have a hard time voicing my thoughts sometimes because I worry if I do it will upset you and you’ll either break up with me which would break my heart or you’d snap at me and be angry or yell or ignore me or otherwise like hurt me and that also scares me because like? I might just let you if that were to happen. And find a way to rationalize why I deserved it. So anyways moral of the story: surprise you fell in love with someone who’s basically the equivalent of a kicked puppy who would probably start literally shaking if you yelled at me in anger. Or would shut down and immediately do literally anything you asked me including sexual things out of this ingrained fear and need to please whoever is angry to get them to stop as quickly as possible.

[tenshindon]

i’m fine i promise i’m ok

#dragon ball #dragon ball z #yamcha #yamucha #tien #tenshinhan #snap sketches #I'M FINE I'M FINE I PROMISE I'M OK #i just finished rewatching the saiyan saga and the rest of season one #so i'ma continue season two tomorrow #BUT YEAH :''''))))) #girl..... girl i just need them to hug each other.... #please toei.... let them just have a hug.... #just one.... #anyway drew this for myself because I Am Still Broken <3 #also uhhhh hoping to send energy to my breadslice so she can finish her fic :)) i believe in you homie <3 #with that ima hit the hay :) nighty night everyone

[slashingdisneypasta]

Ram Sweeney x Reader || Headcanons

Topic: Dating HC's

Notes:

*Sigh*... I write regularly write for creeps like Freddy Krueger and Offenderman... and am one of the few tumblrs that write for Sheriff Hoyt romantically... and yet Kurt and Ram are my real guilty pleasure characters.

Anyway I hope someone other then me wanted this XDD I'm gonna do a Kurt one too.

Warnings: Some NSFW but not explicit.

Your song: The Way I Loved You (Taylor Swift)

He respects my space and never makes me wait

And he calls exactly when he says he will

He's close to my mother, talks business with my father

He's charming and endearing and I'm comfortable

...

But I miss screaming and fighting and kissing in the rain

And it's 2:00 a.m. and I'm cursing your name

So in love that you act insane

And that's the way I loved you

Breakin' down and coming undone

It's a roller coaster kinda rush

And I never knew I could feel that much

And that's the way I loved you

You two as a TV/Movie/Book couple: Bianca Piper and Wesley Rush (The DUFF)

Having the kind of relationship that no one else understands at all. Like, you have nothing in commen except commen history and your feelings for each other (Which are, on the other hand, totally clear to everyone) but when you're together you're always laughing and being affectionate.

Being in an on and off relationship throughout middle school and highschool- but never and I repeat; Never, is anyone permitted to mess with you at all. Because Ram always considers you his, even when you arent together.

So yeah, you always have 2 (Ram, and Kurt) large football star bodyguards at your disposal.

Being very playful together.

SOOOOoooooo much PDA. Including: Making out in the hallways and at school events like football games (You dont care who sees), sitting in his lap or at least squished close to his side at lunch, him throwing you over his shoulder to carry you places, him giving you piggy back rides, him picking you up and twirling you around, him just standing behind you with his arms around your waist and his chin rested on your shoulder when he's bored (With everything but you), his arm being over your shoulders as you walk together, you wiping peanut butter on his nose to get a rise out of him and then running away so he'll chase you, you peppering his face with kisses to make him laugh, etc.

Having a turbulent relationship. Because while, when all is well you two are like peanut butter and jelly and seem like the perfect highschool sweethearts, when you arent it's because Ram has gotten really jealous over something and called you a terrible name (Skank, whore, slut, bitch- any of those) or you understandably got irritated by his bullying and/or being a perverted, sexist asshole and you have huge, blow out fights in the middle of school and by the end of the period the whole student body knows about it.

You give him the silent treatment and the cold shoulder after those (If you didnt break up, that is) and he sends Kurt to give you messages.

When you make up its because he sincerely apologises although he doesn't 100% understand what he did wrong which becomes part of the next fight.

As you've been together so very long, he is basically part of your fucking family. He's so familiar and casual with your parent/s and/or sibling/s. They love him so much that, whether you're with him at the time or not, they allow him into the house and your bedroom with a cup of tea and snacks. (Its the 'American dream' popular-boy / football-star thing.)

So yeah, sometimes when you're mad at him or he wants to get back together (Which generally you want to do, to. You honestly have the same biological timer. Its like, 3 weeks pass by of being broken up and then ding ding ding! You both get the feelings its time to get back together and start sharing grins in the hallway and talking to your friends about eachother) you'll just find him waiting for you in your room when you come home.

Hanging out a looooooot with Kurt. Movie nights at your place, hanging out at the mall together on weekends sneaking out to see them at the football field at night time, etc. When you're sad, they'll both turn up wherever you are to cheer you up, too! Goofballs.

This does not mean there arent times where Ram shoo's Kurt off, though, when you two want some alone time together (*Eyebrow wiggles*) because of course. I'm just saying, you're a close-knit group.

When you are alone together, not much changes from when you're around others honestly XD You're still just as playful and affectionate. You just, you know, also have sex.

When he's down, you rusk your graceful image and climb through his bedroom window to be there with him. You dont fuck, you dont even really kiss. You just climb into bed with him and he'll tuck you under his chin and close his eyes. Legit old married couple. And you two sleep- by morning, he usually feels better and refuses to let you get out of bed with him.

"Five more minutessssss, babe!" He whines, holding you against him and pressing kisses to your head. You know he'll just say that again in 5 minutes time- and over, and over, and over again.

"Oh- no. I've been caught in this trap before Ram. We have school, so we have to get up. Come on!" You push firmly at his stomach (or abs) with your fists; not that that does much as he just just groans or gathers your little wrists in one big fist to stop you (Either way he certainly doesn't even flinch). His eyes are still closed. You sigh.

Now you have two choices, you can either give in and snuggle back into him for the rest of the morning, or threaten to send an attack towards his groin and he'll literally fling himself outta bed. Like "OH LOOK AT THE TIME- Kurt's gonna be waiting for us outside. Lets go!"

There are also mornings that you wake up with him (No sad Ram the night before necessary) and are all too happy to stay there with him. You just adorably nod into his chest, eyes still closed and making the cutest half-asleep morning sound when he asks if you wanna stay here a bit longer and he happily pulls the blanket over both your heads; shielding you both from the real world for a while.

OKAY MOVING ON FROM THAT FLUFFINESS.

You are also the only person who has any sort of control over him and Kurt. Like you can take them down a few pegs with just a look.

You two do date other people when you're broken up but its clear to anyone watching that these are just nice place holders for eachother. Neither of you are ever as happy with others as you are with eachother. You're ridiculously in love, actually.

Ypu were the first one to say I Love You, and he immediately called Kurt for guidance XD

Places you've had sex (Because it is always the full monty with Ram): Both your bedrooms so so so many times, the school bathrooms, his car, Kurts car (Kurt was NOT pleased.), the back of the football field, under the bleachers during a game or pep rally (he was benched for being too violent) + under the bleachers during practise + under the bleachers when the football field is deserted, the back of the school, the faculty parking lot at school, Kurts and Heather Chandler's houses (Parties. Basically a Westerburg High party is not complete without Y/N L/N and Ram Sweeney breaking in someones bed), his parent's car, the woods, cow pasture (a picnic blanket was used), and finally some mall changing rooms.

You leave him messages on his answering machine. He listens to every one of them (Which means something because he doesnt listen to anyone elses, unless he's gotta get through them to get to yours).

Him being SUCH a jealous asshole (With everyone except Kurt).

HIM STANDING UP TO THE HEATHERS FOR YOU.

#PromKingAndQueen

Having Kurt "Smartest guy on the football team," Kelly be your (Occasionally, live in- yes, he has slept over with the two of you on the floor so he could break up fights) couples councellor. Often his advice is 'fuck it out' but he also comes up with oddly wise shit sometimes. Mostly he's just very exasperated though. Like, its obvious you two are gonna end up together- stop bothering me with this shit. Let me get some pussy for myself guys please-

You two getting a bit frisky on movie nights with Kurt and he throws stuff at you. He just starts bringing a pool noodle (That he drew an angry face onto) along with him and hitting y'all with it whenever he feels its necessary. Cuz I mean, on one hand, of course he's happy for his bro Ram that he's getting his dick wet, but on the other- ITS FUCKIN MOVIE NIGHT, PULL YOURSELVES TOGETHER FOR T W O S E C O N D S (Oh the irony- it does indeed escape him). He'll park his ass right in the middle of you two if you keep it up.

If he had survived, you and Ram would have broken up after graduation and spent college apart, before bumping into each other again back home as new (Improved. Especially him) people that fit together better now and ended up getting back together for good.

#Ram Sweeney x Reader Headcanons #Ram Sweeney #Ram Sweeney x Reader #Heathers #Kurt and Ram #Kurt Kelly #Headcanons #Heathers Headcanons #Heathers x Reader

[what-i-call-men]

Summoned

James Patrick March x GN reader

(I tried to go as gender neutral as possible with this)

Warnings: murder mention, not much otherwise just a bit of fighting then fluff with Mr. murder :)

Requested: by me for my fic thoughts “Another free fic thought for tonight! (Wow two in one night isn’t that much of a surprise) anyways the reader and James are dating, but have an agreement that on Halloween they get to go out and have a party/clubbing or just in general where James wouldn’t go. He summons them in the middle of devils night and they shows up wearing like a club outfit, in the middle of dancing too. They get in a fight over their agreement. Could be angst or smut or whatever”

(Pic is not mine)

You had come into the hotel purely on a whim. You had been searching out a place to stay because your relative you’d come to visit had kicked you out over some stupid disagreement. You’d come to the hotel in hopes of a cheap room with whatever money you had. Luckily enough you were able to get a room for a good enough price. Sadly though, you had been chosen that night by one of the monsters that lived in that hotel to be their victim of the night. Luckily though you were barely awake long enough to retain who it was.

For a few days after, you had walked down to the bar to talk to Liz and another woman you met named Sally, obviously there had been some others in there you’d met but Liz and Sally were the main ones usually at the bar. Although on a few nights you’d see a man come down from the elevator and sit further down the bar. Sometimes he’d be writing or reading something, sometimes he had a blonde woman with him and they’d talk quietly. He never really chose to interact with you so you would shrug it off and talk to Sally about her Instagram instead.

It wasn’t until one night that Sally couldn’t make it that you had instead spent the night with James, quickly hitting it off and soon going back to his room to talk pretty much all night. It wasn’t much long after that you two spent a lot of time together, slowly becoming infatuated with one another. You were murdered during the late 2010s and he was from the 1920s so you obviously had a lot of different outlooks on things.

After a few months of spending most of your time around James, you two became official and months turned into years of being together. About a year into your relationship you’d begun to go to devils night, which was not your choice, you only went for James. But it was the worst night of your life. Now you were fine with James murdering and whatever but his friends were the part you didn’t like. Aileen was really the only okay one in your book.

So you and James settled a deal after you throwing up for about an hour after Jeffery “had his fun”. The deal was that you’d spend the day of his birthday with him, doing whatever he’d like because the two of you could leave the hotel, but at night when he had his dinner party you could go out and celebrate Halloween with Sally and a few others that were more involved in the modern works. It was perfect for the both of you. You were not to disturb him and vice versa.

After a long day of spending James’ birthday walking around town, showing a few different places, but mostly doing some shopping for the two of you, you had gotten ready for your night out. James already had given a few disapproving comments and stares to your skantly clad body. Really you just chalked it up to his jealousy and lack of knowledge of the club scene. “Why don’t you just stay home and drink in the lounge dear? I want to be able to keep an eye on you.” He said as you adjusted your top that left little to the imagination.

“James, dearest, you could always come with us but I think the club scene would kill you again if you weren’t already dead. This outfit is tame compared to other people on Halloween.” You muttered and glanced at yourself in the mirror again. You turned to him, seeing him in his extra formal suit. “I’m going to meet Sally, Tristan and Elizabeth in the lobby.” You said and walked over to his frowning face, giving a quick peck to his cheek as you passed.

“Wait Elizabeth is going? I’m really not sure I’d like you to go out with her.” James walked after you as you made your way out the door. He followed after you and grabbed one of his suit coats, slinging it over your shoulders, a bit to “keep you warm” but also to cover you a bit more than the outfit you wore.

“We settled things James, remember? She’s coming with Will and she is your eyes and ears.” You muttered and pushed the down button for the elevator, turning to give him a longer kiss on the lips as the doors opened. You turned back to the elevator as Aileen walked out of them, flipping her hair back. She made a quick comment and whistle about your look as you got in the machine and closed the doors. “Love you my dear. I’ll see you later. I’ll be home before 3.” You called as the door finally closed.

You hadn’t been gone long into the night, you and Sally really splitting off and hitting the drinks hard as the others stayed reserved. What you hadn’t noticed when you left the hotel was that a witch had checked in for the night to do her spells in a haunted hotel. This was unfortunate for you but very fortunate for James who couldn’t get his mind off you not being in the hotel. His friends had even asked about you and were surprised you were allowed out, considering how possessive and controlling James was.

After enough comments from his friends and the time getting closer to your curfew, James beckoned Miss Evers to get the witch to him. She surprised down the hallways with the witch in tow only to be met with James at the doorway to the gathering. “You need to summon a ghost for me.” He said and there wasn’t much fight from the woman after his commanding tone scared the crap out of her.

You were having the time of your “life”, currently dancing against Sally as the loud music pounded through your chest, she was riding the wave of whatever her drug of choice was for the night. Being a ghost from the 2010s meant at least you knew most of the music and blended in well with the others in the club. Tristian had also come to dance with you and Sally for a bit before finding some other people to dance with.

This was the only downside of dating a man from almost a century ago, you knew he was too molded in his ways to ever join you for something like this. You knew if he even knew what twerking was he’d disapprove of you even thinking about doing it. But you currently were, right against Sally who was also learning to do it, but instead rather enjoying the attention you two drew from those around you.

At the hotel, the witch currently sat in the hallway outside the murderous dinner party, her alter around her and one of your rings that James had gifted you sat right on top of the alter. As she began her spell, you were dancing along with Sally, getting a weird feeling in your chest. You chose to ignore it because you’d already felt a bit guilty leaving James today so you assumed it was just the alcohol and guilt weight heavy on your chest.

As Sally wrapped her scarf around you and danced with it around your shoulders, suddenly the scarf hung loose around the air, and when you opened your eyes, you didn’t see your hypodermic friend, instead a very angry James, and his murder friends behind him, sat at the table. You realized the coat he had given you on your way out was very obviously not on you, instead it sat at the club with Elizabeth where all of your things were left.

You opened your mouth to ask how the hell you got here, glancing to the clock to see that it wasn’t even past 2 am, and it wasn’t the time which had pulled you because because all of James’ friend were still sat at the table. James grabbed your arm to pull you out of the room, but you ripped it from his grasp, a sudden surge of anger coming out. “James, why the hell am I here?” You asked and glared at him.

“You told me you’d be home before 3. And you-“ James began to lecture you and you cut him off. “And you promised i would come home to just you and that i could enjoy myself tonight, but obviously both of those were broken.” You raised your voice back to him and crossed your arms. His face became somehow more angry as you brought him down in front of his dinner party. Aileen let out a small whistle to you fighting against him with a quiet “get em” which was met with a glare from James.

“Y/n lets take this outside.” He said lowly and you huffed. “Oh I’ll take it outside. All the way back to the club with my friends.” You said and walked towards the door, letting yourself out, and stumbling over the alter outside the door. “You fucking summoned me, you asshole. Can’t even trust that I’d be home on time. I’m leaving and I will be home as late as i want.” You yelled back at James and he grabbed your arm properly this time, stopping you in your tracks.

He began to pull you back towards your shared room and when he threw you inside, he slammed the door behind the two of you, guests and friends long forgotten as you two stared at each other. You definitely were a change from the silent obedient women he was used to, and him a change from the lenient and careless men from your life. “Why are you so controlling? You get 364 and a half days with me every year for eternity and i can get that one half of a day in peace doing what I want to do?” You shot at him, but he didn’t respond, just pulled his tie off and his suit coat.

“You don’t just get to dress like that and go dance on other people when you belong to me.” James spat back as he grabbed your upper arm again, pushing you back towards your shared bed. “News flash James, we’re in the 21st century and you don’t ‘own’ me. Because I am forced to spend eternity here I wanted to make the best of it and spend it with someone who I enjoy, but until you decide to make a legal commitment to me I am free to be whoever I want.” You shoved yourself away from him as he stood above you, pinching the bridge of his nose.

Letting out a long sigh, James watched you turn to grab a cigarette from his bedside table. “Who said I didn’t want to commit with you, y/n?” He asked in an exasperated sigh. You rummaged around the drawer to search for his matches and looked back to him. “Well for starters, how about your wife? Hmm? How about you on multiple occasions? How about the 2 years of dating and endless arguments how to treat our arrangement with your wife and her boy toys?” You muttered as you couldn’t find a matchbook, now looking back to the drawer.

You paused and gently picked up a small box you hadn’t seen in the drawer before. “James-“ he cut you off and walked to the drawer, catching your attention. “I wanted to ask you earlier while we were out but the ring itself wasn’t ready until after you left for the night.” He muttered and grabbed it from your hands. “I would’ve been more comfortable if people out in the world knew who’s you were. And the arrangement with Elizabeth is over, she can live her life separate from us.” He said and you could barely comprehend his words through your head spinning.

You dropped the unlit cigarette to the ground, instead opting to grab him in a big hug, pulling him down to you. Your makeup definitely was smudged as he pulled away to open the box. “May I at least ask the question? I’ve been planning this.” He unwrapped himself from your arms, using his hand to help you stand up, and lowered himself to kneel before you. His speech was full of plenty of reassuring words, also euphemisms about how death was the thing to bring you two together and bring new life to each other. Your own thought were drowning in love for the ring and the man before you. It was dainty yet plenty jeweled with his own initials being engraved on the sides. It now sat on your finger, you pulling his own lips to yours.

Your solid kiss was soon interrupted by a knock on the door and an exasperated Sally at the door, holding your things in her arms. She paused as you stayed in James’ arms. “Oh thank god we’re not in deep shit.” She muttered and James tapped your back gently. “Go back out but be home soon.” He said lowly. You smiled and looked to the ring on your finger. “I love you.” You whispered and he kissed you before you ran back out after Sally.

#james march #james patrick march #james march x reader #james Patrick march fluff #ahs hotel #fic thoughts fulfilled

[secretaryunpaid]

Sweet Surrender ...

Word Count: 2,455 approx.

Rating: Mature

Warning(s): Anxiety

~~~~~~~~~~ Home visit with Dr. Savannah Beaumont ~~~~~~~~~~

Savannah: Tell me Dahlia… What is it that first drew you to Sam? I know that drinking was involved, but what about him brought your interest to a peak in a drunken moment?

Dahlia: You know I have tried to come to that answer many times … to reassure myself that I am not just staying with Sam out of need. Not a financial need… I have my own money… It could be a physical need… One that satisfies on levels beyond my understanding … It’s not easy explaining what I mean when I don’t fully know…

I guess it could be that I’M broken in a sense … So was Sam… Our broken pieces fit perfectly, completing our puzzle… It’s eerie how it made me feel “whole”.

Savannah:  When you say “whole”, are you saying that you weren’t “whole” alone?

Dahlia:  That word… “Alone” … It once defined me… Who knows, it probably still does if I’m honest with myself… I didn’t see myself as alone, because I have Riley when I have no one else. I’m not sure why my parents left me to my Grandma Addie… 

I remember always being with her… I never thought anything strange of it. She loved me and she, other than Riley, is the only one I felt that from… Until my first night with Sam.

It may sound naive, or just plain dumb, but the way he made me feel … The sensation running through my mind… not even my body, really… Well not at first anyway. (She laughs at the afterthought.) 

It was like watching a lightning storm inside my head. The way the strikes would dance about… two separate ones until colliding and a tree of light branching out from their connection point. I’d feel it in my mind, then get pulled into the physical feeling… It was like drowning in ecstasy … Not the drug, though… I’ve never tried that in my life, lol… But it’s like he was filling my veins with his essence … We became “fused” so to speak…

Hearing it… I sound rather crazy … (Her head falls into her palms, and sniffles begin to fill the silence.)

Savannah:  Dahlia, please look at me. First thing … You don’t sound crazy .. okay! Just a woman deeply in tune with herself … in some ways over others. What I heard from you, when you described intimacy with Sam, is that you were void before and he filled that void. 

The tears aren’t from confusion, but from hating the fact that you fell in love at first contact. But this isn’t something bad or to be ashamed of .... (At those words, Dahlia’s tears stop, her breathing steadies, and she fully focuses on Savannah’s face and words.)

We are human, Dahlia. We don’t always understand ourselves or our actions, but that doesn’t classify one as “crazy”. (air quotes the word “crazy”) The word “crazy” doesn’t necessarily imply that one is incapable of forming rational thoughts … It just says that things are uncontrollably out of order in a sense. That could be a temporary or permanent state. Let’s examine the definition of crazy.

 Crazy

 1 : having a severe mental illness : insane · 2 : not sensible or logical a crazy idea · 3 : very excited or pleased …

very strange or foolish

So, Dahlia, tell me which of those you relate to and why…

This session continued on until Dahlia could see that she was the one that first imposed the “crazy” stigmata to her personality. They made a bit more progress towards self forgiveness. For many years, she had blamed Sam for all of this turmoil she’d caused. But now, for the first step in her healing, she’d finally realized and acknowledged that if she hadn’t allowed her curiosity to get the best of her, Sam could never have had the opportunity to put her in the positions he did.

Now to visit with her sister before going back to her husband. As she was not innocent of infidelity, it wouldn’t be right to condemn him. But she and Jenny are most definitely going to have their “one”.

She arrives at their Valtoria Estate, anxious over all of her self discoveries, and going back to face Sam. She sees the boys, who are footing around a soccer ball as Liam chases them, feigning missed attempts to steal the ball away. 

He fumbles to the ground softly, pretending Mickey tripped him when assisting Mason to make the goal. “Score!,” he yells to Mason as he goes over, plopping down on Liam. “Ah! That's cheating. How are you gonna hold a fallen player down?” He starts a tickle fight as Mason rushes over to help Mickey. He tackles Liam from behind, and he gently falls with both boys, all laughing wildly.

She gets an odd feeling, and suddenly catches sight of Riley on the balcony above, watching with a forlorn look as she gently rubs her belly. Dahlia waves, and she finally sees her, waving her inside. Riley meets Dahlia in the foyer. Hugging her tightly, she asks Riley if she wanted to talk about what has her so bothered.

Tears instantly forming, although she bites them back, she says, “I’d rather hear about what’s up with you baby Sis.” “Riley, I’m not a baby… I’s married now… Remember? I’ll say it for memory this time… I’s married now!” She does give Dahlia a smirk, and nods her head, “No you are not quoting Color Purple lines to me right now…”

“I know it, silly, twice now! We were there for the last one! Come on into the parlor, but leave the jokes.” Once inside, Riley makes them both a drink. “Seeing Liam with the twins… just reminds me of what I won’t be able to give him. It kills me inside to watch the joy he has with them.  I’m trying not to fall into those old feelings again…”

~~~~~~~

“How long were you planning to stay?” Her tone comes off as being annoyed, but not intentionally so. “Wow, sis, tired of us already? Way to make me feel like a desert flower!” Dahlia really took offense to her sister’s words, but responded jovially, “No, seriously though, Riley… Just a couple of more days if you don’t mind. I checked out of the Astoria Beaumont before I came here. I hope that we won’t be an imposition. Liam seems okay with the idea, or am I misjudging. And please let me apologize for running here with barely any notice. You know I can’t talk to mom or dad… “

“Dahlia, Liam’s already in love with your boys, and I can see why. They’ve already touched my heart as well… I think that it’s just too soon for me still. Does it make you mi- …?” Her question is cut short, as Dahlia quickly changes the subject that she knows her sister is about to broach… One too sensitive for her to handle right now…

“Riley, Sam and I aren’t in a good way right now… I don’t know my husband like I thought. Can we just keep… this…” Panic rising in Dahlia’s eyes, she changes the subject yet again. “So, I have good news actually!” Riley takes her cue immediately. “Well, why didn’t you lead with that !!! Give up the goods already !!!”’ She laughs for the first time in days. She can’t believe Dahlia is the one soothing her right now. It’s usually the other way around. 

“I finally finished my special “Queen Phoenix” project. “Queen Phoenix project,” Riley questions. “Just let me tell you the details, and then say yes… But first, do you think Liam can handle the boys for a full day and night? I need you for that long.” Riley gives her a strange look… “This isn’t some after marriage “Wifelorette Party” is it? Cause I have to tell you, I’m not up for that.” “Oooh, that’s for sure going to happen… but, no! So far off ! We’re going to get you pregnant !! Give Liam a couple of little fro babies ...Eeeeeek !!!!”

“I’m…”

“Is this some sort of sick joke!!!” … Standing angrily, she storms out to the balcony to peer at Liam and the boys. Chasing after her, Dahlia regrets her choice of words. “Let me explain! Riley, please !! I assure you… your little sister didn’t just marry a biotech genius, she is one…” She places a gentle hand on Riley’s shoulder, looking empathetically in her tear filled eyes. As Riley’s temperament softens, Dahlia continues… “Trust me !!! Please… I know how sensitive this has been. I wouldn’t mention this otherwise…”

Riley’s tears are streaming as she turns, watching Liam stroll off towards the newly installed interactive Laser Maze with the boys. (Recent upgrades for the visiting Lythikos, local and neighboring kids.) As the top covers the maze, reducing visibility, the boys yell out, “Cool, Uncle Liam !!!,” as he replies, “You boys are going down !!! I may be “old” as you say, but I am fast… Run !“

Turning back to face Dahlia, who’s handing her the drink they never started, sipping her own, she asks, “What’s this about, and the name… What’s it from?” “Okay so the name is symbolic of both your house sigil and you, sis. You will rise from the ashes ! I can guarantee that you WILL give Liam as many Cordonian heirs as you both desire… Now… get me to a secure computer and I’ll tell you everything !!!,” she says, looping her arm with Riley’s and heading inside. 

~~~~~~~~ After Dinner ~~~~~~~~

Later, after dinner, Dahlia takes the boys to their room that has been set up for them. The ceiling is a simulated planetarium. The sky roof is closed with the mock shudders, as if opening to look at an actual night sky. But Queen Amalas has upgraded the software to allow full room display… The boys are actually standing mid galaxy, watching shooting stars zoom past them, and satellites float just over their heads. As they reach up to touch them, they float off in the opposite direction … “Wow ! How does that happen, Dahlia?” “So, I guess bedtime stories are out for the remainder of our stay, huh?” With that, she gives them a quick physics lesson and discussion of Newton’s Laws of Motion while they marvel at it all.  

Meanwhile, Liam is giving Riley a much needed shoulder massage as they soak in the bath together. “You’re awfully quiet tonight my Queen, talk to me. I know when you have something that’s bothering you.” She leans into his touch, as he kisses her neckline.

“Dahlia wants me to take an overnight with her… a whole day actually. What do you feel about that? I don’t like to be away from you…” He kisses her ear, before speaking softly. “She came all of this way to spend time with you right? I think you should go. I’ll be fine… I can show you just how much I missed you when you get back,” nudging her neck with his nose.

“There’s a catch, though.” 

“Am I not going to like this catch?”

“We need you to watch the boys,” she says with a cringe on her face. Pulling her closer to him, he asks, “Is that all? I thought it was going to be something like needing the private jet to Morocco or Paris.” 

“So… You seem comfortable enough with them… You really don’t mind?”

“Riley, I’d do anything for you… You know this.” Kissing the side of her head, he asks, “Can we have a much needed talk when you get back, though?”

“That’s not ominous at all ... “ She leans to get his true feelings by staring into his gentle eyes. “Have I done something to upset you, love? If their being here causes a problem, Dahlia assured me they’d be leaving in a couple of days...”

“That soon, huh? No, love. It’s not your family. They are always welcome here. But… It can wait, right now, I want to finish giving you this body massage. And… I’d be (kiss) happy to watch the boys (kiss). They are fascinating and so full of life. They remind me so much of myself in my younger years.”

She turns to him smiling at his joyous and animated tone. “You know, you are great with them. It makes me …” He tilts her head back to him as she tries to look away. “Don’t do that love. I am not lacking anything with you. And if by some miracle we happen to be blessed with our own, it will only cause me to treasure you more … If not, it won’t change a thing.”

“I really don’t know what I did to come across you, and to have you love me this way, but I wouldn’t trade anything in this universe.”

“Oh, the universe, you say… You mean I’m not worth a galaxy or two to you?,” teasing her as they splash water around.

“Liam! My ha-ir !”

“Don’t worry love, I will wash and brush it, you know how much I love to play in your hair… Although, it might get tangled a bit by the time I am through with you.”

He brings her to sit in his lap, cupping her face as he kisses her tenderly. “This talk… It has to do with my past… Something that I thought I’d never need to share, or think about again. I … I just hope that it doesn’t change your love for me.”

“Liam, look at me… Look me in my eyes, love… Nothing! Do you hear me… Nothing will change my love for you… Ever !! We aren’t perfect, Liam. I don’t expect that… Only honesty. I do know how troubling it can be to have things you can’t share, or it isn’t the proper time to share… I promise you… I WILL understand. And if I need a bit of time to accept whatever this is, just know that I will come to accept it.”

She kisses his lips before continuing. “You chose me for your wife and Queen. I know that I am not of royal blood Liam. But I do know loyalty. I also know that sometimes loyalty will take you past normal boundaries to protect loved ones or accomplish what’s necessary.”

“Whoa there, love… I appreciate your willingness to forgive, but I will understand any apprehension that comes of this. Now… no more serious talk… That comes later… Right now, though, this King’s only duty is to please his Queen… So… What would you have me do for you? Your desire is my fantasy… Let me fulfill them both, my love.”

From her words, all tension is forgotten, both minds only focused on each other as he serves her every need.

~~~~~~~~~

Thank you for reading, commenting and/or sharing.

Chapter that should have followed, “It’s ok not to be ok”…

#@TNA-TRR CROSSOVER #@Becoming Mrs. Dalton #@secretaryunpaid #The Nanny Affair #the royal romance #Mrs Dahlia Dalton #@King Liam Rhys #@Queen Riley Rhys #self reblog #Youtube

[anika-ann]

The 5 Times Steve Felt Betrayed - bonus

and the 1 Time He Felt Like He Was Betraying You

Type: mini-series to a series (part 1 & part 2 & part 3),  Avenger!reader AU.

Pairing: Steve Rogers x reader       Word count: 3400

Summary: Steve might have abandoned you and his friends in Germany, but Steve Rogers does not give up on people. Do you?

Set shortly after the rescue from the Raft.

Warnings: mentions of violence and fights, mentions of the Raft, language...fluff

A/N: This part of Melting Hearts’ verse follows the events of CA: Civil War, sometimes only referencing them and kinda expecting the readers to know what’s up ;)

Posted in double chapters (1st & 2nd time, 3th & 4th, 5th+1... and the bonus, because my brain clearly doesn’t understand the concept of 5+1)

Previous part

────── ·❆· ──────  

Seeking Shelter, Finding Home

Clint had been kind enough to replace Steve in the pilot seat – with a significant look sent your direction. You were sitting away from the others, watching your hands as if you couldn’t quite believe they belonged to you. Steve’s lips automatically press a thin line at the sight – you still looked so small as you had when he had found you in the cell.

Just the memory of The Raft made his stomach turn over. The prison was just inhumane – the way a power-restricting collar had been pinned around your neck, your hands trapped in a straitjacket just in case you would somehow manage to remove the collar. And then there had been the tiny thing in the straightjacket, ready to deliver an electric discharge if you would have left your cell despite all the barriers.

Sure, Wanda had been in the same… outfit, and it was sickening, but seeing you crumbled in the corner of the cell, tied and broken like that – it had made him unable to breathe in or out, his chest just too constricted. And knowing you had gone through all this because of him made it even worse.

Now, you were at least free of your cuffs, in a comfortable hoodie that was two sizes big for you, and yet you seemed absolutely lost.

He approached you hesitantly, his heart jumping to his throat and making it almost impossible for him to speak.

“Uhm… hey,” he greeted you softly and you immediately raised your head to him, a faint unsure smile appearing on your lips. Your absent eyes found his, missing its usual spark. He beckoned to the seat next to you. “May I?”

“Of course,” you whispered, apparently a bit baffled. Steve sure as hell didn’t like the resignation in your voice. “This is your jet.”

He shrugged, seating himself by your side. Your shoulder almost brushed his and it was as pleasant for him as unnerving. So close and yet too far.

“You helped me steal it.”

You eyed him timidly, fumbling with your fingers nervously. Heavy silence fell and for several moments; he just stared into your eyes, drinking in the feeling of being able to do that again. To look into your soul and see all the emotions playing in your head; until you lowered your gaze again, hiding from him.

He sighed, not knowing how to even start, not knowing how to talk to you; you had barely exchanged few words about Bucky’s whereabouts since the rescue from the prison and it had been… awkward, to put it mildly.

God, where should he start? He wanted to apologize. He wanted to ask million questions and most of all he just wanted to wrap his arms around you and hold you close, not saying a single word, because words only made things messy.

That was if someone bothered with forming them – or receiving them.

He gulped and pulled out the folded envelope. He would swear he could hear your heart skip a beat as you drew in a sharp breath.

“Uhm… I didn’t read it. I’m sorry. I… I was angry with you, disappointed. I thought… I thought you left me in a lurch and then you were just… trying to make it better with few words. And after, I didn’t want to… to waste any time. I wanted to find you, all of you, because I left you behind and I knew you suffered for it. And…” he took a deep breath, setting the letter aside, taking your restless fingers in his hands. You looked up at his face, your eyes wide and glassy. It made his throat even tighter. “And I was hoping you could just tell me what you wrote. That you could tell me everything.”

You pressed your lips together, blinking your tears away as you avoided his gaze once more. It was driving him insane, but he couldn’t say he blamed you.

“There’s not much to tell, Steve. I… I agreed with the Accords. With someone watching over us, maybe to be held responsible for--- but all I wanted was someone watching over me. Because I can do so much damage-“

He grimaced, a cold hand squeezing his guts as you stumbled over your words. Forever and always guilty. He underestimated sometimes how deeply your guilt ran.

“That’s not-“

“-and… I hated we couldn’t agree on that. But I never got myself to sign it. Didn’t really have the time and after what they did to Wanda – I couldn’t, it was just wrong. So wrong to hold her prisoner, throwing her under the bus. She made a mistake, yes, but we all did-- and… it wasn’t right. It was when I decided I couldn’t do it.”

“Why didn’t you come with Clint then?” he asked, confused. He was recognizing you now, the motivations you had had suddenly feeling much more like you than he would expect.

You smiled wryly.

“I couldn’t. It was… I figured that maybe at least I could make myself useful. I knew where that was heading. I had to stay with Tony to know their plan.”

Steve closed his eyes, exhaling shakily, your hands in his weighting a ton all of sudden. You had really been playing double agent. That had been such a stupid and reckless move. And kinda brilliant, but that was implied.

“God, Snowflake…”

You freed one of your hands to wipe the tears from your cheeks; Steve gripped your other hand tighter, so you wouldn’t get the idea of stopping touching him for a goddamn second.

“I’m sorry. I’m sorry about the arrest too, but I saw what kind of a task force they sent after you, Steve. You would stand no chance, there was no way you could escape. The heavy guns, Rhodey, snipers, helicopters. It was-“

Steve’s eyes snapped open at the realization.

“You were trying to protect us,” he whispered incredulously.

Oh god. Had you gone completely insane? Had you lost your mind? Had you lost the last pieces of self-preservation somewhere along the way?

“I’m sorry. I know it wasn’t my call and I swear I was waiting until the last moment, I waited until I was sure that they would get you anyway. And I am— I’m so, so sorry for--- for-”

You hand was shaking in his, your voice cracked and you were now wiping the tears uselessly, because new ones were coming constantly. You weren’t able to finish the sentence, but Steve knew exactly what you were trying to say.

And it made him snap.

He threw away stupid ideas like approaching you carefully and wrapped his arms around your trembling form, cradling your face to his chest to hush you. He was taken aback when your weak fingers grabbed the edges of his leather jacket and you melted into him. He tightened his embrace.

“Hey, I know. It’s okay, it’s okay. I’m sorry you had to use your powers against me. I’m sorry,” he mumbled into your hair and you stiffened, you breath hitching.

“What?”

He caressed your back, his previous certainty wavering. “You hated it, didn’t you? You hated it so much, but you did it anyway, because you thought it was the only way to keep us from getting shot.”

You didn’t speak up, unable to find your voice, but Steve could feel your furious nods. He inhaled deeply through his nose, wishing he could just take the feeling tearing you apart away.

“You did the right thing.”

“Right things suck.”

Steve huffed out a surprised laugh and pressed a shameless kiss into your hair. “Yeah. Sometimes they do. But you did it anyway, which makes you the bravest person I’ve ever met.”  

You stopped shaking by then, and you fumbled with his jacket this time. Your face was hidden in the crook of his neck, but Steve would swear your face felt hotter even when he couldn’t see your cheeks. It was a little piece of happiness for him in this huge mess and he couldn’t be more grateful for you being here with him – finally in his arms.

“Can I ask you something?”

He wanted to slap himself the moment you tensed in his arms again. You nodded stiffly anyway.

“After… after Nigeria. Why— why did you start going to Matt? What happened? Were you… were you disappointed in me?”

You retreated, escaping his embrace, and Steve scolded himself for being so stupid. Why had he poked you again? Words always made things messy…

It was only a little comfort that you were still holding onto his jacket. Your baffled face confused the hell out of him – but at least you didn’t seem angry.

“Why would I be disappointed? What… what?”

“Uhm… well… because I froze. I didn’t handle the situation-“

“Jesus, Steve,” you choked out, shaking your head, your eyes finally finding his willingly. The look in them warmed Steve’s heart even when he wasn’t sure what exactly it was supposed to mean. “Is that what you think? That I was… disappointed that you didn’t perfectly keep your cool when Rumlow mentioned Bucky? Did you think I was… thinking any less of you? Judging you? Oh god, Steve. How could I?”

The sincerity of your voice struck him straight in his gut and he was honestly feeling like an idiot in an instant. Of course you hadn’t judged him. You weren’t one to judge people – you hadn’t said a word against Wanda after she had messed up. The only person you ever had been hard on was yourself. How could he have believed anything else even for a second?

Jealously, whispered the intrusive voice in the back of his mind and he shushed it angrily – mostly because it spoke the truth.

“But… why did you go to— uhm, to Matt then?”

You arched an eyebrow inconspicuously and Steve felt a blush creeping up his neck. Yeah, he had been jealous and wounded at the time and it was stupid, okay?

“Because I needed a lawyer,” you explained hesitantly and it was Steve’s turn to be perfectly shocked. Again. What? “A good one. A smart one. An outsider too, at least to certain extent. I wanted to ask him about the possible consequences of the Avengers messing up. I wanted to know his opinion and I didn’t want to ask him over a phone. He predicted the Accords with scary precision, by the way. And he said hi on several occasions, but I never got the nerve to actually deliver the greetings, because I was afraid you would pry why I was going out.”

Steve’s jaw went slack, his eyes widening in awe. That— that was pretty much the only thing he hadn’t seen coming. Shit. You-- you were incredible. You had been thinking ahead. So much. You had been afraid of the consequences so you had gone to a lawyer to be prepared.

Yes, you had sought out the one friend, who had happened to find too much liking in you, but… while he and Wanda had been figuring out their guilt – and Steve was still sure you had taken some of the blame too in your head – you had sprung into action. And his ego had been too wounded to see it.

He tilted his head back, pleading heavens to give him strength.

“Oh god, I am such an idiot…”

“No, you’re not,” you protested immediately, finding his hand to cover it with yours. Oh, how quickly your roles reversed, you soothing him now.

He looked at you, still not quite believing you had done all that. His eyes scanned your form, your face still damp from the tears you had shed, your eyes red-rimmed from crying, dark bruising under. But regaining at least a little of your confidence, you had grown right in front of his eyes. You were incredible. How had he ever doubted that? How had he ever deserved you?

“Really? Because I was being jealous instead of asking what was the visit about, my ego was hurting and I was hurting, and I was too blinded by my petty feeling of betrayal to see what you were doing. And then I honestly thought you just left me – that all we had meant nothing to you all of sudden. I thought the worst of you and I was too damn proud to comply with the single wish you had. I didn’t even read your letter. Which part of that does not make me a complete idiot?”

You bit your lip, lowering your gaze to your joined your hands, caressing it softly. It made Steve’s heart grow in size – but it still didn’t make him less of a jackass, it actually made him feel worse at the same time, because it wasn’t your place to offer comfort to him, it was supposed to be the other way around.

“The part in which feelings aren’t petty and make us human,” you whispered hoarsely, a tiny spark appearing in your eyes, disappearing all too fast. “I wanted to drop it all – the moment you looked at me when I-- when I froze you and the… the look in your eyes at the airport. It was the worst part of it all. You thinking… thinking that I’m a scum.”

Steve had never shaken his head so abruptly as the moment you called yourself a scum. His hand slipped from under yours, only to frame your face with his palms, making you look into his eyes. He was the one feeling like a scum at the moment, because… you hadn’t been that far from the truth and he didn’t think he had ever felt so ashamed for his previous thoughts like at this very moment.

“No. Hey, look at me. You— I was-- I wasn’t thinking straight. I was hurt and felt betrayed and I was disappointed, yes, but never ever-” he emphasized, staring into your eyes as if there was nothing more important in this world. And it wasn’t. “-have I thought you were--- that. And I’m sorry that I doubted you for even a moment.”

Your eyes turned glassy again under his intense stare, so many emotions written in it. You couldn’t bear it, you wanted to look away, but he wouldn’t let you, holding your gaze.

“I’m sorry,” he repeated firmly and you finally managed to close your eyes to escape.

It was when he did one of the boldest moves ever. Without a single hint of permission, after your relationship had suffered an enormous hit and with him not having a clue how you felt about him now, he pressed his lips firmly to yours, stealing your breath away.

He didn’t know what he had expected, but the hesitant response turning into an eager one within few seconds was not it. Your hands flew to his hair, interlacing in them and pulling him closer, your mouth opening for him almost immediately. He sighed at the unexpected sensation, a shiver of excitement running through his body. Your mouth was hot and wanting against his, one of your hands trailing down his chest; when it stopped above his navel, he found himself silently groaning in disappointment.

It was also when he realized where the hell you were and how much audience you had. His fingers twisted in your hair – god, he missed that – and he withdrew just slightly, setting a slower pace and putting some distance between you two. You seemed to get the memo, because you gently caressed his abdomen over the fabric of his t-shirt, separated from his lips and rested your forehead against his. You were both out of breath, panting.

Steve opened his eyes first, only to see your lips kiss-swollen and parted as you fought for a little air, your eyes still closed as if you were trying to regain some composure. His lizard brain whispered more and he listened, kissing you one more time; but at least wary of keeping the kiss socially acceptable this time. It was next to impossible to part again.

“I’m sorry,” you breathed out and Steve looked at you, once again confused.

“For?”

You licked your lips, the movement utterly and unfairly distracting. He retreated and your eyes snapped opened as you cleared your throat.

“I honestly don’t know where we go from here – and now I mean… like… the two of us, but… I’m sorry. They took all of our personal belongings,” you whispered, embarrassed and pissed off a bit.

Steve tilted his head to side, not following. Yeah, he knew that. Why were you pointing it out?

“…okay?”

“All of it. Including… including jewellery.”

“Oh,” he let out intelligently, his heart expanding in his chest with hope.

Really? Was it possible that-… really? Sure, the kiss you just shared was nothing sort of loving, you had cleared things out and maybe it should hint him, but…

“I mean... I know you're probably angry with me-“

“Would you still want it?” he breathed out, astonished. He was trying to fight the euphoria creeping into his voice, no doubt showing on his face, but he couldn’t help it. “After what happened? After I... thought you turned your back to me, after I left you behind even when knowing you actually didn't? After I became a criminal?”

“I am a criminal too, Steve. And… I told you to go. You didn’t want to, because you're not leaving people behind. And you came back. I… I love you. Of course I’d still want it.”

He felt his lips curl up in a smile that mirrored only a fraction of the surge of joy in his veins. You didn’t seem to follow why. The declaration alone would be enough to make him feel like this, but… well. At least the little delay in the rescue had been worth it.

“Why are you smiling like that?” you asked him warily, hesitant raise of the corners of your lips lighting up your face as well.

Steve reached into his pocket, drawing a thin chain with a ring out, holding it out between the two of you. You gasped in awe, watching the chain you had bought to protect your ring while fighting wide-eyed.

“How-?”

“When I asked the guard about it, he looked at me as if I was crazy. Maybe I am,” he explained with a shrug and you chuckled incredulously, biting your lip.

“May I... may I wear it?”

Steve had honestly no clue how you could be asking such a stupid question. He observed your features that seemed to come alive, finally back to your usual self – the sunshine in even the darkest place.

And that thought gave him a stop; he was in a pretty dark place at the moment and he didn’t think it would get any better any time soon.

“I… I’m in a terrible mess, Snowflake. I’m probably the most wanted criminal in the world now. Are you sure?”

You cleared your throat significantly. “Steve, allow me to remind you that I am a fugitive too. That’s the first thing. The second thing… you’ve done nothing wrong – the whole criminal thing is just a word, a label someone gave you. And the third thing… I know what I’m signing up for. I knew you were trouble – for a good cause – when I said yes the first time. I knew you were trouble long before I fell in love with you. So yeah, I’m pretty sure.”

“God, I love you so much,” Steve murmured before he could even think of anything else.

As he freed the ring so he could slip it back on your ring finger, you held out your trembling left hand for him. It wasn’t fear – it was excitement all over again. Too many emotions to contain. Steve felt the same. He was stunned, moved, and felt so incredibly loved and strong with you by his side that there weren’t any better words to say anyway.

He enclosed your hand in his when the ring was on place, bringing them to his lips only to plant a kiss over the thin metal. It made you smile like a madwoman.

From the corner of your eyes, you saw Sam Wilson fist-bump with Scott Lang. You hid your face in Steve’s chest with silent laugh.

You had no idea what the future held for you now – you could only guess that it wouldn’t be exactly pretty. But as long you were not about to face it alone, you were ready and determined to fight all the battles coming your way.

────── ·❆· ──────  

S.R. masterlist

Hell Froze Over (next in the series)

────── ·❆· ──────  

Thank you for reading!

Someone once told me that fluff is my default setting. They weren’t wrong. I know mini-series was a bit different and with shorter chapters, but hopeflly, you enjoyed nevertheless.

Sequel ahead, this one a longer one! Title’s Hell Froze Over... I can promise you a new enhanced on the scene, some fluff, some angst... the usual :-*

#fanfiction #steve rogers x reader #steve rogers x you #captain america x reader #captain america x you #steve rogers imagine #captain america x imagine #steve rogers #captain america #mcu #marvel #avenger reader #melting hearts #5 times steve felt betrayed #anika ann

[cinnonym]

christmas magic's brought this tale (to a very happy ending)

Written for Day 10 - Game Night / Movie Night of 12 Days of Christmas @supercorpbb

Read on AO3

***

r/relationship_advice – posted by u/anonymous1000 – 13 hours ago

My (25f) crush and best friend (27f) chose a lesbian classic for movie night, how do I react?

Disclaimer ahead: I haven’t used reddit before and am thus not very fluent in etiquette and formatting, but please bear with me because I am seriously overwhelmed by the current situation and would appreciate all forms of help. I’m also typing this in a hurry, because I’m supposed to be in the bathroom, so please excuse typos or inaccuracies. I’ll try my best. But now, without further ado, here goes:

I (25f) have been crushing on my best friend (27f) pretty much since the day we met. For context, that was two years ago, and while we started out on a business relationship, it evolved into a close friendship almost right away. This is mostly due to her, I must admit. She’s the most open-minded person I know and simply couldn’t be “scared away” by my bad reputation (which I inherited). Needless to say, I’m very grateful for her. She’s not only my best, but has also been my only friend for quite a while, before she introduced me to her inner circle. I unironically owe her my happiness (and my life, several times over, but that’s unrelated to this story).

I’d fallen in love before I realised what was happening. Usually, trust and affection come slowly to me, but her I loved almost right away. That’s simply who she is, a person one cannot help loving. Also, she’s very attractive, side note. I used to flirt with her sometimes, in the beginning, before I became aware of the depth of my feelings (this is awkward to talk about, btw, thank goodness for anonymity online), and back then, it seemed like she wasn’t all unresponsive to my advances. Then again, she isn’t very good at saying no to anyone, because of who she is as a person, so maybe she was only being polite? I’m not sure.

Anyway, she had a boyfriend then, and I had to come to terms with my feelings, so I sort of drew back a little. I’d been with women before, so that was never an issue, but I’m uncertain whether she has ever considered women. Her sister is gay, and she is very supportive of her, but we’ve never talked about how she feels. As far as I know, she’s only ever been with men though. Either way, I’m not in the business of making moves on taken people, so I mostly focused on fostering our friendship.

The thing is, as long as I can be close with her, I am sort of okay with being “just friends”. I mean, isn’t close friendship like a romantic relationship, just minus the romance? And minus the physical advantages (although she is a very cuddly person, so that’s nice). And, like, of course, I’d like to mean more to her. Of course I’d like to take care of her every day when she comes home, cook her dinner, listen to her worries, massage her neck, kiss her goodnight. Of course I’d like to be The One to her, just like she is The One to me. But considering that she’s probably straight and not interested in me in that way, I’m mostly okay with just being her best friend.

Or, I was mostly okay with it. But recently she’s… been acting differently towards me. She’s giving me these long glances when she thinks I don’t notice (I do). She’s going out of her way to make sure I’m fine and don’t work too much (it’s a tendency I have, especially pre-Christmas). She’s told me she’s been working on my Christmas gift almost all month (and I can’t for the hell of it guess what it could be). She’s even invited me for Christmas with her family (since I don’t celebrate with mine).

And now today, she chose the film Carol for movie night (movie night is a weekly thing we do, I should have mentioned that earlier, maybe), which is, as you might know, about a lesbian relationship. And I don’t know what to do.

She claims to have chosen the film because it was on a list of Christmas films (and I suppose it does have christmassy vibes), and because it “sounded fitting”. Sounded fitting?? What is that even supposed to mean? She doesn’t know I’m gay, so it can’t be that, unless she somehow figured out. Is she gay and this is her way of telling me? And if so, how do I react? Is this her letting me know she’s interested in me, or am I reading too much into this? Did she even realise this was a lesbian film??

Anyway, she’s calling from the living room, so I need to go. I’ll try to take another bathroom break halfway into the movie, and I’d appreciate it A Lot if I had some reactions in by then, because I’m panicking a little here. Thank you all!

Tl;dr: my supposedly straight friend chose a lesbian film for movie night, and I don’t understand her intentions behind that.

(P.S. She and her boyfriend have broken up months ago. She’s currently single.)

***

r/relationship_advice – posted by u/anonymous1000 – 11 hours ago

UPDATE to this post

First of all, thank you all so much for your quick replies, they’re really helpful. As you might have guessed, I managed to negotiate another bathroom break mid-film (though my friend is currently sulking on the couch, she didn’t want to let me go? :) ?) and am, once again, typing as fast as my fingers will allow. Much has happened.

I’ve mentioned that my friend is a very cuddly person. Today was no difference – as soon as she’d pressed play on the film, she’d already enveloped me in one of her bone-crushing hugs (she’s very strong). Normally, I let myself sink into these embraces, because she really is a phenomenal hugger, but today my speculations were so prevalent in my mind that I could hardly breathe when our bodies touched.

(She noticed my reaction right away, and immediately asked if I’d rather not hug (to which I replied a vehement no), and this really isn’t very important to the story, but I wanted to let you know.)

As the film progressed (largely unregarded by me, I must admit), I noticed several things about her behaviour that seemed odd, though:

One, her heartbeat became considerably faster as soon as Carol and Therese had met on-screen and it became clear that their relationship would be the focus of the film.

Two, she’s been side-eyeing me a lot more frequently than usual (she tends to watch me watch films if she knows the plot already, but considering she probably hasn’t seen Carol before, this seems out of character for her).

Three, and this is… I don’t even know how to feel about this, but… how do I formulate this best…  When the sex scene was playing, I swear she looked at my cleavage and blushed.

I’m sort of ecstatic (because those are hints, right? I can’t be the only one to think that those are hints?) but also very very VERY worried that I’ve totally misinterpreted the entire situation. Then again, all of your comments sound incredibly hopeful and affirming, so I guess I’m not entirely wrong in my assumptions?

I need to go back now (I’ve been here way too long already), but I will definitely keep you updated. It’s so heart-warming to see how invested all of you are!

@everyone who told me to kiss her already: if she keeps this up, I just might :)

***

r/relationship_advice – posted by u/anonymous1000 – 1 hour ago

UPDATE! All’s well that ends well!

Hey everyone, I am so sorry for the late update. I ended up being… somewhat busy last night.

:) :) :)

So, long story short, we’re dating now. And yes, I did kiss her (or she kissed me, I can’t remember exactly. We somehow kissed each other simultaneously).

Long story slightly less short, because I see you hungering for details in the comments (and my now-girlfriend said you deserved to know), here is how it went down:

We didn’t even finish the film. We didn’t even resume the film, after I returned from the bathroom. Because when I did, giddy and ready to Do This, she wasn’t even looking at me. No, she was looking at her phone.

Now, I’ve never seen a person look at their phone with an expression quite as shocked as hers. She was, I’m not kidding, completely frozen (and if you knew her, you’d know that doesn’t happen often).

So naturally I rush over to her, worried as can be, thinking something bad happened, a catastrophe or maybe an accident in her family. And as I kneel by her side, and she still hasn’t moved, I happen to see what she’s been reading on her phone screen.

And it’s reddit.

I’m not gonna lie, for a second I thought it was all over. I mean, she’d obviously recognised us in my post (so much for anonymity everyone, the internet is treacherous), and judging by her expression, well… I assumed the worst.

But then she turns around and she fixes me with this incredibly cute stern stare she has, and she goes: “[My full name]. Have you browsed the relationship tag even once?”

And I shake my head, completely dumbfounded of course, because what does that have to do with anything. But apparently it plays a crucial role, because apparently you all know my girlfriend.

Her username is @supergirlssupercurls and she’s been posting the entire journey of our friendship/romance on this platform. Turns out she loves me too.

:)

She’s also told me to end this with: and they lived happily ever after.

(Let’s hope we do).

#supercorp #supercorp fanfiction #sc fanfic #sc #supergirl #christmas #christmas fic #mini fic #my writing #movie night

[swtorramblings]

The Many in the One

For Day 3 of Mace Windu Appreciation Week.

Crossover: There are plenty of interesting works of fiction and fictional characters out there, let’s see Mace interacting with one, or more! Is it someone from another sci-fi series? Or another Samuel L. Jackson character? The sky’s the limit for who he might meet.

Sorry, but romance? Ships? I’d need a much longer run up for anything like that, if I could make it work at all. I should have started earlier in the month, I guess. Well, unless it was set to Disney music. Hmm… So, I went with the alternative. As such, it is quite a bit more far-fetched than the previous stories. Hopefully still all right, though. It’s also longer.

“Unlimited power!” As the last words Mace was ever going to hear, those were especially stupid. And horribly frustrating. He’d protected the Republic all his life. Dying now to this tyrant that had installed himself as its ruler, with the approval of so many, crushed his hopes long before it was going to crush his body. It was almost a relief when he was flung out the broken window. He fell, his final thoughts devoted to trying to find a solution, something that could have been done differently, tormenting him with answers that no one could have known until it was much too late. Then, he had a vision. Wolves, racing in a circle. A way to make another chance, a portal opened in the past, but reaching out to him now, and echoing into the future and the past. He reached for it with his remaining hand, closed his eyes, and pulled. He landed on a path, floating strangely in space. He had expected to be crushed by the fall, still, but looking around, his survival in this strange place was probably the least surprising thing about it. He could sense them out there, all of those that had ever been able to access this place, this world between worlds. In this place, there was only this one moment, so they were all here. Thousands of them, perhaps. Along with several other Mace Windus. He tended to his injury first. The wrist was cauterized, so he was in no danger of bleeding to death, but he wanted to be sure it wouldn’t cause him any further issues, other than having to adjust his fighting techniques. Then he remembered that he had lost his lightsaber along with the hand. He realized also that he was still in shock, from the fight, from the failure. No point in dwelling on it. He set off, exploring this strange place. He found several portals back to the galaxy, but recognized them for the past. He was tempted, to go through one, to warn them, perhaps even to warn himself. As he explored, though, he realized that he would unravel reality if he did so. What had happened was tragic, but he couldn’t risk making it even worse. Then, strangely, he found himself, but not as he had ever been. It wasn’t his past, and he had no future, so who was this? He was certain that it wasn’t just a random resemblance, but truly himself, and yet not. This portal, he could feel, was safe. More, it was necessary. He stepped through. The other him was startled, of coursed, but calmed himself quickly and echoed Mace’s own thoughts from earlier. “Well, you’re not the strangest thing I’ve seen lately.” “No, neither are you. Where am I? Who are you?” “It’s hard to explain. We’re inside a vessel from the far future, where a horrible accident flung it here. I’m Dr. Harry Adams.” “Ah, that does make sense. Mace Windu.” “That’s an odd name.” “I could say the same. Anyway, I’m dealing with time travel right now myself.” “Because of course you are. The problem is, this machine is twisting our own thoughts against us. I’m trying to be dispassionate, but my own fears will add to the others eventually if we can’t get them under control.” He felt it, pulling at him as well. Power to make his thoughts real, if he let it, if he could remain focused, but horribly destructive if he lost control. He smiled at his latest apprentice. “That, at least, I think I can help you with.”

The training took some time, but their unique situation made it possible, still. He didn’t have to train Harry in all the nuances of the Force, or lightsaber combat, strategy, or any of the myriad things a Jedi might need. Only the technique of self-control, awareness, and letting go. Still, it probably took years. Harry was normally too old to have accepted this teaching, but they had the time. Eventually, he shook hands with his teacher, and left the sphere. Mace knew he would eventually have to return to the path. He also realized that he had already done what he was about to do. He was beginning to hate time travel. He returned to the world between worlds, allowing himself to be drawn back. He looked at his new hand, a robotic one similar to the one Skywalker sported, created with the Sphere’s power. It made him uncomfortable, but something had told him that he would need it soon. The other item he’d created while in the Sphere he drew from his belt. As he pressed the switch, the purple light made him smile.

He came to another portal, seeing himself once again, an older man who had endured a great deal, and was using that experience to save others, to force them to act together to save themselves. Moments later, he died, horribly. Mace waited for the scene to start over again. He could appreciate irony, and knew he probably shouldn’t interfere, but this went too far. He was speaking his last words now. “But first, we’re going to seal off this…” Mace jumped through the portal and struck just as the massive aquatic beast emerged from the water, slashing through it with his lightsaber, driving it, badly wounded, back into the water. Then he raised his hand, strained for a moment, and brought down the heavy steel door slamming down to seal this entryway. His counterpart backed away, gaping at him in fear. He tried to smile reassuringly for a moment, but it wasn’t working, so he turned to the others. “All of you, are you going to listen to this man?” They just stared. “I said…” Uncharacteristically, he raised his voice. He preferred calm persuasion, but it seemed like what they would respond to. “ARE YOU GOING TO LISTEN TO THIS MAN?” They all started nodding vigorously. One of them said, “Yes, anything he says.” “Good. Maybe you’ll get out of here alive.” Two journeys, both underwater. He wondered if Master Fisto should have been on this journey, but the job had fallen to him. Still, he liked the idea that he was honoring his old friend here. He hoped he would approve, even if he had to hurt the sea creature. He nodded to himself, who nodded back, and stepped back onto the path.

He saved a brutal man, a version of himself that was a paid killer, with a simple telekinetic trick to divert the projectiles that would have killed him. This also saved this version’s friend, but only for the moment. The other him, though, decided to do better. As a small reward, Mace got a glimpse of something in a case his other self carried, and was comforted for a moment by its golden light. Really, the snakes were no trouble at all. His fragile but brilliant self Mace attempted to persuade from his path, but he was too enamored of his own theories about the way the world worked to be changed. A shame. The leader, the manipulator, the organizer, he also couldn’t save, gunned down in his apartment. Mace eventually replaced him, knowing that his work wasn’t done, learning enough of this strange world to be able to explain how he had lived through the attack that his allies found plausible. It was a good life for a time, though the eyepatch sometimes itched. Eventually, though, after having seen himself in many lives and many circumstances, his own hair grown and gray, he knew his time was nearly over. Through one last portal, before he returned to that moment on Coruscant, he heard his own voice, impossibly helping a young woman, a young Jedi, long after his own death. He knew he had to return to be there when she would need them all, so he went back to that first portal, finally, and fulfilled his fate and his duty with no regrets. Mace Windu became one with the Force, like all before and after him, but had touched the multiverse. How could he have regrets?

#mace windu appreciation week #In order: #Revenge of the Sith #Sphere #Deep Blue Sea #Pulp Fiction #Unbreakable #MCU #Rise of Skywalker #Subtitle could be Forest Mace #oops forgot Snakes on a Plane it was really short

[nikibogwater]

A Shot in the Dark: a Tales of Arcadia Fanfiction (Chapter 1)

"...The Arcane Order doesn’t actually care whether you live or die. They have given me permission to do to you whatever I deem necessary. So...” Douxie swallowed and grit his teeth as Rivan’s hand began to glow with an ugly, pulsing red light. “...I will ask politely one more time before I resort to more extreme measures. Where is the forest-child Nari?”

When Douxie is stripped of his magic and captured by a new enemy, Nari and Archie risk everything to come to his rescue.

(Chapter 2)

(Chapter 3)

Here we are, dears, the first chapter. Don’t forget to check out the author’s commentary after you’ve finished (if that’s the kind of thing you’re interested in) and I will be back with the next chapter on Nov. 13. Thank you all for waiting, and I hope you enjoy. 💕

Read on Ao3

Or under the cut:

Most of Douxie’s mornings began with the harsh, clattering sound of his phone vibrating and whistling next to his ear. Necessary as his morning alarm was, he still hated it with every fiber of his being. So he had been borderline ecstatic when he slipped into bed the night before and left his phone alarm off, envisioning a long, uninterrupted sleep that he hoped would end no sooner than ten am, preferably eleven. This Saturday marked his first real day off since moving to this blasted city, and he intended to relish in it with all his might.

So he was just a tad miffed when, at approximately eight-fifteen, a strange, nervous sensation rising in his chest slowly pulled him from slumber. He attempted to ignore it, simply burrowing down deeper into his pillow, but the feeling did not abate. He could not shake the peculiar awareness that he was being watched. In the end, centuries of experience forced him to heed his instincts, and he pried one eyelid open and glanced over his shoulder.

Two pairs of luminous golden eyes were hovering uncomfortably close to his head and staring at him fixedly. Douxie yelped and threw off his covers, scrambling upright and fumbling for his magic vambrace nearby. A small green hand held it out to him politely, and after a bit of confused blinking, Douxie finally registered the faces of his companions. Nari and Archie were sitting on the floor next to his mattress, looking at him eagerly. He felt himself deflate as he gave a long sigh of relief.

“Fuzzbuckets, you two, don’t creep on me like that,” he admonished lightly, fastening his vambrace around his left wrist. Nari gave him a sheepish smile while Archie stepped up onto his mattress and rubbed against Douxie’s side.

“Next time, don’t oversleep,” the Familiar replied. “You do remember what day it is?”

“Yeah, it’s Saturday. My day off. Hence the reason I was sleeping,” Douxie said with a yawn, stretching his arms above his head.

“It’s also the day you promised to bring Nari to Central Park,” Archie informed him.

“...It is?” the wizard mumbled groggily, looking at the wood nymph crouched nearby. She gave him a somewhat apologetic nod.“...It is. Ah, fuzzbuckets, I’m sorry, I completely forgot.” He tumbled out of his bed, snatching up his day clothes from a heap on the floor. “I’ll be ready in two shakes,” he promised, ruffling Nari’s hair before pushing himself to his feet. He staggered to the bathroom, running his fingers through his sleep-mussed hair, very nearly smacking his head on the doorframe.

“Perhaps we should not have woken him,” Nari fretted as the door closed behind the wizard.

“You know Douxie always acts like a plague victim first thing in the morning, regardless of how much he slept.” Archie reminded her, following Nari into the kitchen area and pulling the box of English Breakfast tea out of the cupboard while she filled the kettle at the sink.

Mornings for Nari looked very different than they used to, she realized as she set the kettle on the stove, stepping back so Archie could light it (due to her somewhat complicated relationship with Bellroc, she was still wary about anything that involved fire). As a demigoddess who had existed for hundreds of millenia, she had never had much experience with something as human as family domesticity. Her siblings (if the Arcane Order could ever really be called such) certainly never spent mornings bustling around a kitchen making tea for one another, but even if they had, Nari was beginning to understand that there was more to being a family than the mundane routines. There was a feeling in the air around her, a sensation of companionship and contentment that felt almost otherworldly at times, yet it was inextricably linked to these small, daily, human gestures of kindness.

Douxie emerged from the bathroom a few minutes later, just as Nari was squeezing out the teabag. His damp hair was combed back into its usual neat appearance, and he was wearing his favorite hoodie. He mumbled a quiet ‘thanks’ as Nari presented the cup of tea to him, and slumped back against the island countertop as he took a sip. Archie sat down on the counter behind him, pressing against his wizard’s back and purring contentedly into the soft, warm fabric of his jacket. Nari mirrored Douxie’s position beside him, trying to quell the nervous excitement fluttering in her chest. She had heard much about Central Park, and after going two-and-a-half months without feeling any real grass beneath her feet, the thought of visiting even the smallest pocket of nature made her spirit tingle in anticipation. But she kept still and quiet, trying her best to be patient as Douxie drank his tea, slowly working his way back to full alertness.

“Right,” he sighed after he had drained the last drop from his mug. “You two already had breakfast?”

“Nari was kind enough to open a tin of sardines for me earlier,” Archie answered. “And she says the sunlight is strong enough today that she will not require any food.”

“Okay,” Douxie hummed as he set his mug in the sink and ran water in it. “Then I guess we’re ready.”

“Wait,” Nari chided, opening one of the cupboards and pulling out two granola bars. “You need sustenance as well.”

“Right. I forgot,” the wizard chuckled, slipping her offering into one of his pockets. “I’ll eat when we get there.” He grabbed his keys off of the counter and held out an arm for Archie to clamber up onto his shoulder. Nari scurried to the door eagerly, practically bouncing on her toes as Douxie reached out to undo the magical seals. Before his hand made contact with the door, he drew back suddenly and snapped his fingers.

“Fuzzbuckets, I’m forgetting all kinds of things today,” he muttered, turning to the small demigoddess. “Nari, face me and hold very still for just a second.”

“What is this for?” she asked, intrigued as Douxie knelt down to her level and placed his hands on either side of her head, his middle and index fingers pressing gently against her temples.

“I’ve been looking into some concealing spells that can be cast directly onto a person, rather than on an area. It’s a lot more complicated than the standard protective wards, but it should make your aura undetectable to other magic users for a little while.”

“Isn’t that a little excessive?” Archie remarked, climbing down from Douxie’s shoulder in order to give him some breathing room for the spell. “The entire reason we came here is because it is almost impossible to detect individual auras in a place this crowded.”

“I don’t see any harm in taking extra precautions,” Douxie replied. “Keep very still for me, Nari.” He closed his eyes and took a deep breath, his aura flowing out and wrapping around her like a warm, familiar cloak. “Celare,” he murmured, and Nari felt a sharp tug on her spirit as the spell washed over it, cool and comforting like the shade of an old tree. Douxie’s hands fell away from her head and he sat back on his knees, his breath short and a little ragged. “Wow,” he panted. “You have....a lot of magic. I almost didn’t have enough of my own to cover it all.”

“...I’m sorry,” Nari answered meekly, unsure of what else to say. Douxie laughed breathlessly and shook his head, bringing a hand up to squeeze her shoulder.

“You’re fine. I’m just impressed.” He levered himself back to his feet, bracing himself against the door for a moment, before seeming to collect his bearings. Archie hopped back up onto his shoulder and nudged his head in silent inquiry. Douxie waved him off with a soft ‘I’m fine.’ Then he disabled the protective seals and opened the door, stepping back and gesturing to Nari. “Let’s go.”

“Should your magic not also be concealed?” she asked as they emerged into the hallway, pausing while Douxie locked the door behind them (the ordinary way--he didn’t see any need for magic seals if none of them were home).

“I’m afraid I can’t cast the spell on myself,” he explained, pocketing his keys. “Anyways, I don’t think the Order had enough time to get a good feel of my aura. It’s your magic signature they’ll be looking for. Relax.” He smiled down at her as they began descending the uneven stairs (it was unknown whether there was ever a time in history when the elevator in this complex had actually functioned). “There’s nothing to worry about. Let’s just focus on having a good time today, alright?” He stopped her halfway down the flight so he could lift her over a broken step.

“Alright,” Nari promised. They made it to the lobby and burst into the sunlit street outside, the taste of freedom burning on the wood-nymph’s tongue like those carbonated drinks humans were so peculiarly fond of. The park wasn’t too far away, and Nari was still somewhat distrustful of automobiles, so they had opted to walk. She made sure to hold on to the edge of Douxie’s hoodie tightly so she wouldn’t accidentally lose him as her eyes wandered the cityscape, taking in the sights.

The first time she had walked the streets of New York City, Nari had been on the verge of tears. There were so many sensations assaulting her mind at once, the feeling of countless souls buzzing around, a crowd of spirits so thick that sometimes it felt like a wall. Even without tapping into her roots, she was drowning in a sea of tangling energies, as hundreds, even thousands of voices echoed in her soul all at once. It was more than she had ever experienced in one place before, and it had made her frantic with the desire to claw her way out of her own skin. The protective wards Douxie cast on their apartment helped filter out most of the magical noise, but it had taken several weeks of regular exposure before Nari was able to walk out in the open without clinging to Douxie’s hand so tightly that her nails left crescent marks on his fingers.

She had learned how to block out most of the noise now, and only felt the faintest twinge of anxiety as they joined the sea of bodies traversing the city. It helped that whatever spell Douxie had put on her was having a sort of swaddling effect on her aura. Her spirit felt comfortably nestled within her, not completely deaf to the world around her, but still separated from it in some way. She was even able to discern the individual life forces of the people around her, pick out who was emitting which charge. It was like a chaotic smear of colors had sharpened into a recognizable picture, one where she could finally see the finely drawn details and appreciate the contrasting shades.

Until suddenly, with a jolt in her stomach, she realized that one piece of the picture was missing entirely.

She and Douxie had stopped at a crosswalk, and were waiting for the signal, when her eyes drifted across the figure of a man, leaning against some brickwork near the turnoff into a smaller alleyway. He was fashionably dressed, (“business casual,” the humans called it), with an elegant black trench coat hanging nonchalantly off of his arm. He had dark brown hair, handsomely trimmed and styled, just a bit longer than Douxie’s, and was wearing a large pair of expensive-looking sunglasses. He looked thoroughly uninterested in the world around him, and had the appearance of someone who was waiting to meet up with a particularly tardy acquaintance. But Nari couldn’t sense that he was waiting. She couldn’t sense anything from this man. He emitted no life force, no aura or energy of any kind. He was like a standing, breathing corpse. Feeling oddly sick all of a sudden, Nari pressed closer to Douxie’s side and frantically tugged at his sleeve.

“What’s wrong?” he murmured, the sound swallowed by the noise around him, though Nari was able to feel his intent through his aura.

“I-I am not sure. I felt...Well, actually I did not feel...” she stammered, unsure of how to communicate what had just happened. Across the street, the signal changed, and the people around them surged forward. Douxie glanced at the crosswalk and then back at her, a silent request for her to make this quick. Out of ideas, Nari pointed back to the space between two buildings a few feet away from them, hoping to bring his attention to the man in question.

Except, when she looked back, he was gone.

“...What is it?” Douxie reiterated, glancing between her and the alleyway in confusion.

“There was... There was a man there, just a moment ago. Except, he was not there. I-I could see him, but I could not feel him. He had no aura or life force.”

“Perhaps he was a spirit?” Archie suggested, speaking as quietly as he could so as not to draw attention to himself.

“No, I have seen spirits before. He was definitely a living human,” Nari objected. “But he....It was like he had no soul.”

Across the street, the crosswalk signal changed again. Beside her, Douxie’s aura was rippling with unease. But a moment later, his spirit stilled, and he put an arm around her to turn her away from the alley.

“...Whatever it was, we don’t know for sure that it was a threat. It was strange, yes, but I don’t think we need to worry about it just now. It might not have anything to do with us. Heck, it might’ve just been a trick of the light, or--”

“Douxie, I know what I saw,” Nari interrupted, putting as much force into her small voice as she could.

“--or it might have been something real,” Douxie amended, giving her an apologetic look. “But whatever it was, we don’t have any reason to be anxious about it. Not yet, and maybe not ever. Let’s just get to the park and have a good time, alright?”

Nari fell silent, and gave a reluctant nod. A minute later, the crosswalk signal changed once more, and they continued on their way. Though Douxie’s spirit was radiating a placid energy, Nari couldn’t help noticing that he kept his arm around her for the rest of the journey.

To be continued. ✨

#tales of arcadia #toa #wizards: tales of arcadia #wizards: toa #fanfiction #douxie #nari #toa archie #the magical siblings #and their therapy cat #the adventure begins <3 #a shot in the dark

[thedaughterofkings]

feels like...

For my very best @ohfuckthisshit!!! I hope you like your almost 2k of eighth year Birthday Drarry fluff <3<3<3

Harry stumbles across him in one of the Potions practice rooms. They’ve gone largely unused the last couple of years, at least as far as Harry is aware. Snape was never fond of students brewing potions unsupervised, but that is no longer an issue, is it?

Still, Harry doesn’t expect to see Draco Malfoy down here, at 3 am in the morning, brewing god knows what. Harry can’t complain about the time of day, or night rather - after all, he’s still awake, too, and wandering through the castle. Turns out that the nightmares don’t stop just because the bad guy has been defeated. 

They are just nightmares now, no longer visions. Sometimes Harry thinks he preferred the visions, as horrible as they were - at least with them, there was a chance he’d learn something helpful. The nightmares are just horrible period. 

So when all he sees when he closes his eyes is blood and bones and broken stones, he gives up on sleep entirely and walks the castle, drawing comfort from the mended staircases and trusty walls. 

Hogwarts is still standing, and she’s still breathing with life, and that brings Harry immeasurable comfort. Her halls are quiet and calm at night - well, usually. Malfoy’s muttering and cursing is what draws Harry into the Potions practice room in the first place. 

He is wearing the invisibility cloak, so he doesn’t worry about being seen when he steps closer to take a look at what Malfoy’s brewing. The cloak is distorting his view a little like always, so Harry isn’t sure whether the pearlescent sheen is the potion itself or the cloak. He’s more distracted by the scent anyways, because there’s something really familiar about it. He’s so busy sniffing that he doesn’t even see the hand coming at him until it has ripped the cloak off him.

Draco is looking particularly smug, keeping the cloak out of reach, and raising a single eyebrow in silent judgement.

“Spying on innocent classmates, Potter? Whatever would your adoring fans think?”

Harry glares at him and crosses his arms in front of his chest defensively. He’s only wearing his pyjamas, and next to Malfoy, who is impeccably dressed even in the middle of the night, that makes him feel almost naked. 

“And what about you?” he returns. “What are you cooking up here in the middle in the night?” He takes another sniff and starts laughing. He suddenly remembered why that scent was familiar. 

Malfoy has raised an eyebrow and looks decidedly unimpressed.

“Are you quite finished?” he asks when Harry has calmed down again somewhat. “Care to share with the class what is so funny?”

“You are brewing up your own perfume!” Harry honestly is delighted by that revelation, and resolutely ignores the voice piping up with the question why he knows Draco’s perfume so well.

Draco’s face has become unreadable - not hostile and not quite blank either, but Harry still can’t tell anymore what he’s thinking.

“What exactly are you smelling, Potter? Harry?” he asks, correcting himself. They’ve mostly stopped calling each other by their last names. Like with Hermione and the troll in first year, there simply are some things that forge a connection between you, and surviving fiendfyre together is definitely one of them. It felt wrong to keep up a petty school rivalry in the face of that - and everything else. 

So in the name of newly forged connections and truces, Harry answers truthfully:

“Your perfume - or aftershave? Are you experimenting with the composition, though? Because there’s something sweet - treacle tart? - here that I don’t remember smelling before. And to be honest, I love Quidditch at least as much as you, but that grassy element is definitely too strong for a perfume.”

If only his first year self could see him now - discussing Draco Malfoy’s perfume with the man himself in the middle of the night. 

Draco Malfoy who has stepped around his cauldron and closer to Harry now, a hint of a smile playing around his mouth and crinkling the corners of his eyes.

“Want to know what I’m smelling, Harry?” he asks and Harry shrugs, looking up at him questioningly - because Draco has stepped close enough that their height difference becomes noticeable. Up close, his perfume is even stronger and Harry barely resists the urge to scrunch or worse, scratch his nose.

“I also smell the Quidditch pitch,” he starts, and Harry nods, because yes, why wouldn’t he. But then Draco continues: “Then I smell cake, carrot cake to be precise, and chocolate frogs, and a hint of mint.” Harry does scrunch up his nose at that and takes another deep breath. But he still smells treacle tart, not any of the things that Draco has mentioned. They do remind him of something though … oh, the care packages Narcissa still sends Draco, though only weekly instead of daily nowadays. 

He opens his mouth but whatever question he was going to ask slips from his mind immediately when Draco puts a finger to his lips, smile more obvious on his own right now.

“Then I smell fire, not fiendfyre-,” here he shudders almost unnoticeably, due to their proximity Harry feels more than sees it- “but hearthfire, big logs and glowing embers. Did you know Gryffindor tower is the only dormitory to still have an open fire?” he asks conversationally, as if they are just talking about the weather. Harry doesn’t know what they are talking about, it’s certainly no longer about Draco’s perfume, but it’s also not the weather. Or hearthfires.

“The other houses have of course long switched to more modern warming charms,” Draco adds, and Harry rolls his eyes. 

“Of course,” he mockingly agrees, trying not to feel charmed by Draco’s ability to sound wistful when talking about Gryffindor’s fire in one sentence and then immediately subtly insult it with the next one. He wonders whether that alone counts as character growth - subtlety certainly didn’t use to be one of Draco’s strengths.

It is apparently now, though, because without Harry noticing, Draco has pressed in even closer and his finger has moved from Harry’s lips to his chin, gently coaxing his face upwards, until he’s looking Draco in the eye. Draco’s face is no longer blank, his eyes in particular are shining brightly, their grey almost silver, like the potion brewing in the cauldron next to them, and Harry suddenly finds himself breathless.

“More than anything else, though,” Draco starts again, voice even, but insistent, begging Harry to listen, to listen and understand, “more than anything else, I smell you, Harry.”

And without giving Harry a chance to wrap his head around that, to make any sense of that statement, he ducks down and presses a gentle kiss to Harry’s lips. Harry blinks dazedly when it’s over, realising he’d closed his eyes without intending to, and licks his lips instinctively. He almost thinks he can taste Draco on them.

“You’re not making your own perfume,” he states matter of factly.

“Ten points to Gryffindor,” Draco mockingly praises and Harry pinches his arm in retaliation. At some points his arms have wrapped around Draco’s shoulders. Harry considers removing them, but Draco hasn’t stepped back yet, so Harry doesn’t feel obliged either.

“You are brewing Amortentia,” he says next. It’s the easiest of the thoughts that are running wild in his head to put into words. “Why are you brewing Amortentia in the middle of the night?”

“Extra practice.” Draco shrugs. “Extra credit.” His voice is perfectly even, but Harry can tell how much it rankles him to have to admit to needing extra credit in Potions of all subjects. It doesn’t seem fair to Harry either, Draco’s potions skills are second only to Hermione’s in their class, if that. He’s certainly better than her at anything that requires even the smallest bit of intuition beyond precise measurements. Harry makes a mental note to keep an eye on that. Their current potions teacher is less obviously partisan than Snape and Slughorn were, but that doesn’t necessarily mean she’s fair. 

But they were talking about Amortentia.

“So you smell - me?” Harry asks, still not quite able to believe it.

“And you smell my perfume,” Draco answers, which isn’t really an answer at all, and an answer and another question at the same time. “And you thought I was brewing it myself!” he adds, sounding incredulous.

“Don’t you?” Harry has to ask, because it honestly sounds like something Draco would do.

But that just gets him a scoff. 

“As if! It’s imported from France obviously.”

His nose turns up so haughtily at the obviously that Harry just has to reach up and drag him into a kiss before he says anything even more obnoxious.

Their second kiss is much better than their first, if only because Harry’s brain is actually working this time, registering how soft Draco’s lips are, and how one hand has curved around his jaw, gently moving him until their mouths fit together just so, while the other has taken hold of Harry’s hip, and how its grip tightens when Harry’s tongue teases at the seam of Draco’s lips.

The kiss is also better somehow because Harry was the one that initiated it this time. He doesn’t even really know why, but perhaps because it made him feel more like an active participant? He was a Gryffindor after all. 

Draco nipping at his lower lip derailed his train of thought rather effectively and drew his attention back to the kiss and all the sensations that were almost threatening to overwhelm him, like Draco’s nose tickling his cheek, Draco’s hand slipping into his hair, Harry’s hand doing the same, wondering how soft Draco’s hair feels, slippery, silky, very luxurious in any case, which is only fitting of course. 

And then a horrible, horrid thought cuts through the blissful fog that has clouded Harry’s mind and he breaks away from the kiss with a gasp.

“You were brewing Amortentia!” he accuses, not even yet fully able to verbalise what exactly he’s accusing Draco of, but mind full of memories of chocolate cauldrons, mead, and bezoars. 

Draco’s annoyed groan drags him out of the dark spiral he was going down.

“For goodness sake, Potter, stop thinking, it’s obviously not working very well, and keep kissing me instead,” he demands and it’s so obviously, horribly, wonderfully heartfelt and obnoxious, and nothing like Ron’s poisoned ramblings, that Harry shoves aside any lingering suspicions and throws himself into another kiss, not without giving Draco’s hair a quick tug in punishment for the insult first. 

This, their third kiss is definitely the best of the lot so far, and Harry wonders whether it’ll continue like that, if he’ll keep counting every kiss, and if every kiss will be better than the one before. 

It’s a nice thought, and with that he pulls Draco yet that little bit closer and decides to turn off his brain for now. 

Perhaps this is what Amortentia feels like.

But perhaps it’s just what love feels like.

#happy birthdayyyyyyyyyy Larissa!!!!! #ohfuckthisshit #Drarry #Harry Potter #my fic #my Drarry fic #happy reading! #links to other fics in the first reblog because that's how we have to do things nowadays isn't it

[maybe-itll-be-someday]

13/ I’m in awe and in love with what you’ve created in this AU and don't quite know how to articulate all of my love for it. Anyways I think that’s the end of my rambles (for now at least). sorry it had to be broken up into so many parts to send through. Take care of yourself and take all the time you need to finish the last chapter and make sure that it makes you happy. Whatever you write is more than worth waiting for. I eagerly await the last chapter whenever it's ready 💖

Okay. So, this is the only ask I think I'm going to answer out of all the ones you sent me because I WANT TO KEEP THE ASKS IN MY INBOX SO I CAN READ IT WHEN I'M FEELING DOWN. That is how much I love everything you wrote to me, and you caught so many parallels that I built into the story that I had no idea if anyone would see, but you did and I'm so happy that you did.

You have no idea what kind of effect this has on a writer. You single-handedly added 3,000 words to the last chapter since I saw your messages yesterday. Knowing I have readers like you who appreciate all the small things I've built into this universe keeps me going.

Now I'm going to answer all the asks individually under this cut, because I'm not going to answer them on my page but you definitely deserve responses to EVERY SINGLE ONE!

1/ I love that you're rereading the later chapters. I'm not going to lie, as much as I loved building their relationship, it's truly the last few chapters that I'm super proud of.

2/ Yes! That's exactly what I was going for - the transition from friends to something more is always tricky because there is a great foundation to build a relationship on, but there's also a risk of losing all of that if you're not sure of the other person's intentions. I'm glad that it came across!

3/ The cafe is kind of where they transformed from being just friends to something so much more. It definitely holds a special place in their heart (it might come back in the last chapter, who knows? me. I know. it's already written. LOL)

4/ THANK YOU FOR YOUR KIND WORDS. I also really like that line because it shows how separated they have to keep who they are at work vs who they want to be when they're together. It's a fine, delicate line that they toed.

5/ Literally smiling so wide as I read this. It was one of my favorite lines to write but also the most nervewracking if that makes sense? I was truly worried about how I was going to write their first date, because it had to be them but it also had to fall in-line with S7 canon. It's also such a big thing, to finally go all in on a relationship for our king and queen of emotional unavailability. I wanted to make sure the poignancy of them saying "fuck it" and going for what they want was clear.

6/ Good God. I wasn't sure if anyone was ever going to catch that. I'm a huge fan of parallels, if that's not obvious in my writing by now, and that's exactly what I wanted to achieve. He felt like he was getting put back together while she was falling apart.

And you can't be whole together when the other person is broken.

7/ I actually drew inspiration from watching the finale of season 7! I wanted to retain the anxiety you would get from watching time tick by and the scene where Emily is watching the clock intently as she was thinking through the flag colors is what inspired me. I wanted it to read like you were watching the finale.

Also, I just want to thank ACA for its service in keeping all readers on edge in this fandom.

8/ I've been getting a lot of good feedback from the way I wrote the post-breakup and I love writing Emily/Jack scenes. Them dancing at JJ's wedding I think was one of my favorite bits to write because it's just Emily being a Mom to Jack and her not realizing it.

9/ I'm glad that it made you teary - that was kind of the point. They still love each other, so much that they'd celebrate their anniversary even if they're not together, but sometimes, love isn't enough now is it?

10/ Fun fact: Mark's profession isn't mentioned in canon! But I always imagine Emily with someone who really challenges her, so I thought that lawyer would be best. I decided to go with corporate because I'm entirely unfamiliar with how the criminal justice system in the UK works LOL

11/ Hehe yes I am quite proud of myself for thinking of the box HAHA

12/ Home is wherever your heart is, and I don't think her heart was ever in London.

THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR TAKING THE TIME TO WRITE AND SEND ME 13 INDIVIDUAL ASKS. My week was made by you sending that, and like I said above, this means everything to writers. It means everything to me.

#asks #anon #HOW DO I SEND YOU ALL MY LOVE AND AFFECTION BECAUSE I WOULD LIKE TO SMOTHER YOU IN IT RIGHT ABOUT NOW

[falseroar]

Dog Days Part 3: Slow Recovery

((Jameson and Marvin are relieved when their friend finally wakes up, but it’s clear Y/N still has a lot of recovering left to do, and not just physically.

Link to Part 2, and to the series as a whole here.))

When the wolf woke, Jameson felt the paw shift slightly beneath his hand, the brief tension before they relaxed again. He looked at the barely opened silver eyes and tried to snap his fingers to get the attention of the man seated in the other chair in the exam room before resorting to kicking him in the shin.

“Hhh-I’m awake,” Marvin muttered as he straightened up, his voice husky with sleep. “What is it, JJ?”

At Jameson’s gesture, the magician was quickly up and standing next to him beside the wolf that nearly covered the entire padded exam table.

“Y/N?” Marvin asked, only to be answered by a weak whine from the wolf. “Shh, it’s okay. It’s me, it’s Marvin, and Jameson, we—”

He hesitated and looked at Jameson, who only stared down at the wolf with sadness everywhere from his eyes to the droop of his shoulders as he gently rubbed the wolf’s bandaged paw.

“You’re going to be okay,” Marvin tried again. “This clinic belongs to Dr. Schneeplestein, we wrote about him to you, remember? He’s the one who—he took the bullet out of your…”

Marvin trailed off. It had been hard enough, standing there in the operating room and using his magic to keep you asleep while the doctor worked. Even the doctor wasn’t sure if anesthetic would have any effect on a werewolf, and he seemed just as surprised as Marvin when he retrieved the misshapen bullet from your chest, only for the wound to immediately close and leave nothing but a scar behind.

He still remembered the clink of metal as the doctor dropped the bullet on the tray beside him before his eyes met Marvin’s, the doctor’s voice muffled behind his mask as he said only one word.

“Silver.”

As if he heard his name, or probably because he had heard it, there was a knock at the door before the click of the lock and Schneeplestein poked his head into the room.

“The patient is awake, yes? May I come in?”

He started to walk in without waiting for an answer, only to pause when the wolf on the table sat up so quickly that Jameson startled back while Marvin quickly reached for the line leading to the wolf’s other leg.

“Careful, Y/N, your IV!”

“Ah.” The doctor nodded as if he had been expecting this and carefully closed the door behind him before he said, “Perhaps I should address zhe elephant in zhe air first.”

Jameson and Marvin paused at that before Jameson signed, “I think you mean ‘elephant in the room.’”

“Close enough,” Schneeplestein said, dismissing the matter with a wave of his hand. “Please allow me to introduce myself, Y/N. I am Dr. Henrik von Schneeplestein, a very good doctor if I say so myself, who also happens to be a vampire. You have my vord that I have no intention of hurting anyone in zhis room.”

The wolf on the table stared in the doctor’s direction with those silver eyes, ears twitching as though gauging the reactions of the other two men before they eased back into lying down.

“Ah, very good,” Schneeplestein said, and the wolf’s ear twitched again when the doctor let go of the breath he had been holding in, the tension easing out of his shoulders. “It is a pleasure to meet zhe Y/N Marvin and JJ speak so highly of.”

He stepped as close to the table as he dared and held out his hand, quietly noting how long it took for the wolf to react before they awkwardly raised a paw and moved it in his general direction if nowhere actually near his hand. He caught the paw and gave it a gentle shake before letting go and asking, “May I take a closer look at zhe patient?”

There was another, different kind of pause before the wolf’s head dipped once in a nod, and the doctor’s face lit into a smile.

“Fantastic! First I am checking zhe chest area from zhe surgery,” he said, gently raising the wolf’s leg as he spoke so that he could get a clear look at their chest, where only a white, livid scar in the shaved area marked where the wound had been only hours beforehand. “And now I will check again for any broken bones or other issues, okay? Let me know if zhere is any pain, preferably without any biting zhe doctor.”

He meant it as a joke, but the second he placed his hands on either side of the wolf’s head and began moving down their spine the wolf’s lips rolled back to reveal a set of very healthy teeth. Knowing that the wolf was trying very hard to restrain their reaction somehow did not make the examination any easier, but the doctor continued to gently check the area. There was no sign of anything out of line until he pushed back the tangled mess of fur and saw the skin underneath.

He hissed to himself and began to check the rest of the wolf’s back and chest. He had noticed the inflammation during the surgery, but had assumed at the time that it was just around the wound. Now he could see that it was so widespread that it seemed to cover the wolf from head to tail.

“Like burns,” he murmured to himself. “Zhere must be something to help with zhat, but it will be difficult with all zhis fur.”

“Would it help if they changed back?” Jameson signed before looking at the wolf. “Don’t you think it would be more comfortable, Y/N?”

“Jameson,” Dr. Schneeplestein said, as gently as he could.

“Or are you afraid it will hurt? Maybe if the doc can take out the IV first—”

“Zhey cannot see you, Jameson,” Dr. Schneeplestein interrupted. He drew a penlight from his pocket and shined it in the wolf’s eyes without any reaction from them, confirming his suspicions. The light illuminated the cloud of silver that completely covered their eyes, hiding any sign of movement or recognition underneath. “Another side effect from long exposure to zhe silver mirror, I think.”

Silence greeted his words, and Jameson’s hands dropped mid sign as he looked from the doctor to the wolf in disbelief.

“It’s not permanent, is it?” Marvin asked, and the wolf’s ears fell.

“It is too soon to tell,” Schneeplestein answered with a sigh. “We can hope, yes, but I do not know for certain.”

“I mean, their chest healed as soon as the bullet was out, so why can’t…” Marvin reached under his mask to rub at his own eyes. “Maybe we missed something? Jameson is right, Y/N if you could just change back it would make this so much easier.”

The wolf did not respond, and when Jameson reached for their paw again they pulled away, shifting until their back was against the wall, their body curled in on itself except for the leg with the IV attached which remained sticking out.

Jameson and Marvin shared a glance, and Marvin gave a tentative “Y/N?”

The wolf just closed their eyes, and when Marvin started to try again Dr. Schneeplestein cleared his throat and said, “Perhaps ve could speak outside? Y/N is still needing rest, after all.”

Outside the room, in the short hallway that connected the three examination rooms to the front of the small clinic, a young man slouched in a chair looked up from his phone and sat up at the sight of the other two.

Before he could ask about the patient, JJ’s hands moved quickly, signing so fast that it was all the other three could do to keep up.

“What’s wrong? Can they not change back? Maybe whatever fiend locked them away in that mirror performed some kind of magic—”

“I think I would have sensed it, as long as I’ve been with them,” Marvin interrupted. “But if there’s a physical reason…”

He looked meaningfully at the doctor, who could only shrug. “I cannot rule it out. Zhey have been through so much, yes, but perhaps zhat is all zhe more reason not to change back?”

He waited, and when the other three still seemed confused, Schneeplestein said, “What would you do, if zhey changed back now?”

Jameson mimed a hug, but Marvin’s immediate answer was, “Find out who did this to them.”

His tone did more to suggest what would happen once he got a name, and the young man with the phone looked from the magician to the other two with visible unease before he said, “That’s what the doctor means, right?”

“What?” Marvin asked, realizing too late that came out harsher than he meant it to. “What’s wrong with that?”

“Well, I just know that when I’d been through some…bad stuff, the last thing I wanted to do was immediately relive it by telling someone, you know?” He rubbed the back of his neck, his red-rimmed eyes meeting Marvin’s before quickly looking away.

Schneeplestein nodded. “Exactly, Chase. I can do what I can, but Y/N is needing time, and understanding, not question, question, question.”

Marvin clenched his fists but nodded to show he understood, while Jameson ran his hand up and down his arm before signing, “I should go back in there. I don’t want to leave them alone, again.”

“Yeah, I’ll—" Marvin cut himself off with a jaw-cracking yawn and the doctor shook his head.

“You both should be going home and getting some sleep. It is too late in zhe morning for me to leave, so I will be staying here anyways.”

“No offense, Doc, but it’s not the same,” Jameson signed. “Y/N will feel better with someone they know around!”

“Somehow, I still feel offended,” Schneeplestein muttered, but he added a smile to show that he was joking. “JJ, zhey vill be fine, but zhere is zhe cot in zhe supply closet if you insist on staying. But Marvin, you have used up so much magic, you need real sleep.”

“We can trade off staying with them,” Marvin suggested, if only because his swimming head combined with the way every little noise felt like an attack on his senses to leave him little will to argue. “Chase, you coming?”

“I actually just told Schneep I’d swing by the store for him and pick up a few things once they open,” Chase answered before looking down at his phone. “I can text Jackie, he’ll probably want to walk you home.”

“Pass,” Marvin muttered under his breath, but the younger man didn’t seem to notice. “Jameson, Henrik, you two let me know immediately if anything happens.”

“Will do,” Jameson signed while the doctor nodded with a gesture to shoo the magician on his way out.

Chase waved and followed Marvin out the hallway’s door to the empty waiting room of the closed clinic, and both had barely stepped outside and locked the door behind them before a man in a red hoodie stepped up to them, seemingly coming out of nowhere.

“Don’t do that,” Marvin said, too tired to jump despite Jackie’s sudden arrival.

“No one’s around,” Jackie answered, gesturing at the empty street. Dawn wasn’t that long ago, and even the early morning joggers hadn’t strayed this way yet. “Chase said your friend woke up. Have they told you what happened?”

“No,” Marvin said, immediately regretting the decision to shake his head. “We won’t know anything until they’re ready to change back and talk to us.”

“Hm.”

Marvin’s eyes snapped up to meet Jackie’s. “What?”

Jackie seemed to consider playing it off before going straight for honesty. “I told you, something about all of this feels off.”

Chase looked from the magician to his friend before asking, “What do you mean?”

“These guys have been looking for their friend for years, and suddenly Marvin just ‘senses’ them out of nowhere? Marvin, you told me yourself you’d been to that house before, multiple times, but there was no sign of anything except…the thing that used to be there. Why would they show up now?”

“We went over this last night,” Marvin said, his jaw tense as he tried to keep what few shreds of his patience was left, “There are a hundred reasons why. Maybe my magic got stronger, maybe that particular entity has grown weaker, maybe Y/N had enough strength to try and reach out through the mirror for help, or maybe, just maybe, I just screwed up before. Maybe I just missed something so incredibly obvious that it took this long for me to notice, okay?”

Jackie seemed visibly surprised when the magician’s shoulders sank and he was quick to say, “I didn’t mean—Marvin, you know that’s not what I meant, I just—”

Marvin cut him off with a raised hand, his other reaching up underneath his mask to rub at his eyes again. “Look, I just need to go home and get some sleep, okay?”

“I’ll go with you,” Jackie said, possibly more than a little eager to make up for what just happened.

“Don’t worry, I don’t need a bodyguard,” Marvin said, his words slurring together now. “Keep an eye on Chase or JJ or…whatever, I don’t care.”

He was already walking away, and Jackie looked helplessly from him to Chase.

Chase rolled his eyes and said, “If you want to keep an eye on him, do it. The rest of us can take care of ourselves for a little while.”

“Call or text if you need anything,” Jackie said, hesitating briefly before he added, “And just…keep an eye on the wolf, okay? Something about all of this just feels off.”

“…Yeah, I will.”

Chase and Jackie shared a look before Jackie went jogging after the magician to catch up with him before he could jaywalk across the street.

For a moment, just a moment, Chase felt the cold chill of being watched. He made a show of looking down at his phone, while underneath the brim of his hat he scanned the street, but there was no one else to be seen except for the pair lightly squabbling as they walked away.

The feeling passed and he tried to shake it off, but he double checked that the front door to Schneeplestein’s clinic was locked before he walked away, glancing over his shoulder as he did so.

With as much care as he took, Chase still missed the shadow on the other side of the street that was there one second and gone the next.

((Thanks for reading part 3! I actually titled this part after writing the rest of this note, but: I guess if it isn’t clear already, the District Attorney is going to be recovering from a lot in this story. The physical issues at least are temporary, but they’re not going to have a full bounce back after coming out of the mirror. That’s why the first few parts with them are going to be on the slower side, but they are building up to something, I promise.

Link to Part 4: Information Exchange.

Tagging: @silver-owl413 @skyewardlight @withjust-a-bite @blackaquokat @catgirlwarrior @neverisadork @luna1350 @oh-so-creepy @weirdfoxalley @95fangirl @lilalovesinternet-l @thepoolofthedead @a-bit-dapper @randomartdudette @geekymushroom @cactipresident @hotcocoachia @purple-anxiety-blog @shyinspiredartist @avispate @missksketch ))

#markiplier #jacksepticeye #fanfiction #werewolf au #monster hunter au #wkm au #wkm district attorney #jameson jackson #marvin the magnificent #dr schneeplestein #chase brody #jackieboy man