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[ENG sub/translation] Bojan Cvjetićanin: "Slovenia is too small for Tinder" (podcast)

Bojan Cvjetićanin on Cosmopolitan podcast, originally published on the 15th of September 2020 here. Podcast host: Anamarija Lukovec. Translation by @varianestoroff, native English proofreading by TWT @/klámstrákur.

This is an audio-only podcast, but you can listen and read the subtitles along with it here:

youtube

or you can read the full transcript in this post!

Teaser:

Bojan: I don't want to be available... available with a click. I want to be available in that if I am sitting in a bar, anyone can come up to me, that any girl can come up to me and ask me, I don't know, “Would you like to have a drink with me?”, “Can I have your number?”, whatever. Which doesn't happen anymore anyway, but...

Full transcript under the cut!

Host: Hi, believe it or not, the Cosmo Podcast is back. And it's back for a new, changed second season. Some things will stay the same, some things will change a little. And the very first thing that remains the same is that ... it remains the same that I will still be in front of the microphone. My name is Anamarija Lukovec and I'm the executive editor of Cosmopolitan.

In fact, I was thinking that we don't even know each other. We don't even know each other, actually. Even if you've heard all the episodes from last season, you probably don't know anything about me. I don't know anything about you. So I will introduce myself with one piece of information, which has somehow defined the new season. I notice in myself that I have many opinions that are not widely held. And also that, [while we] as a society are promoting ourselves as increasingly open-minded, free-thinking, accepting, we often act very hypocritically and are even Hostile to opinions that are not in line with ours, or with some opinions that are accepted by the majority.

So I want every guest of mine who comes to the new season of the podcast to present their unpopular opinion as a starting point for our discussion. To break taboos, to talk about things that may often go unheard to educate ourselves, and perhaps to anger or soothe our souls. Okay. Yes, and I'd really like to get to know you too, I'd like to know who you are, who's basically a Cosmo Podcast listener, so I'm inviting you, to send me your ideas, your secrets, your compliments, your complaints. Or you can just write, "Hi". I suggest Instagram for that. You can DM me at lunaticpoetry. It's L-U-N-A-T-I-C-P-O-E-T-R-Y. And yes, I don't use my real name, more on that another time.

So yeah, if you're up for it, we can get started and kick off a new season of the podcast. My first guest, yes, it's a male guest, not a female guest, I can't believe it, a round of applause... he's a musician, singer, frontman of the band Joker Out, Bojan Cvjetićanin. I'm sure you know him. I am sure you have a very good reason for knowing him. Bojan came to talk to me about relationships, dating, girls...

Before that, before we did the podcast, he also made a video. We invited him for a blind date in front of the camera because Bojan is single, wink wink. So yeah, I invite you, after you're done listening to the podcast, to click over to youtube.com/cosmopolitanslovenija where you can watch the blind date with Bojan¹.

And yes, let's start, right. Hi Bojan.

Bojan: Hi.

Host: How was your first blind date on camera?

Bojan: I was a bit nervous because I hadn't been on any blind dates before, and then the first time it was in front of the camera, oh my gosh. The camera catches everything, you can't hide anything. But I think I did a great job. The girl was great too.

Host: Do you think maybe you two have a future together?

Bojan: I don't know. I don't know. I must take a look at the crystal ball at home.

Host: Ah ok. In fact, our topic for today, your unpopular opinion, is also a little bit about love, dating, and so on. Can you just reveal your thoughts?

Bojan: My unpopular opinion, I don't know how unpopular it really is, but it is that Slovenia is too small for Tinder.

Host: Okay. And why do you think so?

Bojan: I feel that way because it seems to me that we all know someone who knows someone, and in Slovenia, this kind of social network very quickly turns into something where in the end everybody knows everybody and Tinder, at least in my experience, is quite, how should I say... funny, because you very quickly come across people you know.

Host: But maybe Slovenia is too small for dating in general? Because sooner or later you find, meet, date someone who someone you know has dated or been in contact with.

Bojan: I think it is. In fact, it is... We have this concept of dating, which I think is very different from the American one. In America, it's normal to go out with someone a couple of times a week and then, if you like them, you go to another one and maybe something develops. I don't think that exists here. Here, if you like someone a lot, you write to them on Instagram and then, if you're lucky, they say you can go out and two days later everyone knows.

Host: Yes, pretty much.

Bojan: Then you are off the list for all her friends.

Host: You close the door.

Bojan: Yes

Host: Do you think that makes us slower to go public with our relationships?

Bojan: Shoot, I don't know. Maybe we are a bit more secretive about it then, because of that, because we want to keep that certain feeling that the whole city doesn't know exactly who you're with but then all your friends are thinking about whether they know someone who was with your girlfriend or for girls if one of them was with her boyfriend.

Host: But perhaps the biggest problem here is that we are somehow closing our options, when we decide too quickly whether to be with someone

Bojan: To close our options with others?

Host: Yeah, let's say, because you know that if you're with a girl, then you probably won't go out with her friends or acquaintances. Well...

Bojan: In fact, that's probably pretty true, yes. Because I already feel that since we tend to introduce our friends to our online followers, and you're usually with them on stories and in photos, it would be a bit strange if one of your acquaintances dated the same person two months later, when you [and that person] were previously in the same pictures.

Host: And everyone would know. And suddenly you have a soap opera in front of the whole world.

Bojan: Right.

Host: Since you said Tinder is too small for Slovenia, you probably have your own experience with Tinder. You mentioned something earlier when we were filming. Would you tell us a little bit about your encounter with this app?

Bojan: I have a rather funny experience with Tinder. I was very interested to see what it was like. And of course I had to download it. And I made a profile, I put like three photos up and so on. And then I started getting screenshots of my Tinder profile in Instagram messages from some followers, “Oh my god, is that you?”, “Hey, is that you?”, and so I was like, “No, it's not me, no. It's a fake profile. It's a fake profile.” And it felt really awkward so I deleted it immediately.

Host: But why did you feel awkward?

Bojan: I actually made one because I was curious...

Host: In what it is like?

Bojan: In what it is like. This user experience. You actually see people and you just swipe them and there are no consequences. Nothing happens if you swipe someone left or if you swipe someone right. And I found that very interesting. But then I realised, yes, okay, but now it can be public opinion that I need to look for a girlfriend through an online service.

Host: Girlfriend. Or a one night stand.

Bojan: Right.

Host: Do you think public opinion is generally negative towards online dating? Because it seems to me there it is a kind of stigma, or something people are hesitant about when going online to look for love or a partner, because it's, I don't know...

Bojan: I think that this ‘Frendi in Flirt’ (‘Friends and Flirting’)² started when I was little and then the whole story was that these are services for people who are desperate. Both Tinder and these apps have normalised things a lot, I think, because it's virtually at everyone's fingertips. You sign in with that one click to connect with Facebook or you make a password and that's it. It used to be a process of making a profile and a photo and put the age and blah blah blah. And it was a bit more official, I think, when you decided to take that step. Now it's not a step anymore, now it's just, I download it in my room at home and in three minutes I have Tinder. So I don't think there is that much stigma about online dating anymore, I also know a lot of people who are in some kind of relationship through this, so I'd say there's still a bit of that, okay, LOL, you met on Tinder, there is no stigma of being a sad loner, someone desperate.

Host: By going on Tinder, you are basically admitting to the whole world or to all people who will see you there, that you are looking for something. And that's a bit awkward for us to admit. Yes, I am looking for something.

Bojan: Yes, in fact it is. I also... that was one of the reasons I deleted it. I mean, what is there for me to find now, you know?

Host: I'm cool on my own.

Bojan: Yeah, I mean, no, I'm cool on my own, but that, well, not everyone needs to know, that I am now looking for something, and that I am very available. Do you know what the cool thing is? That... I don't want to be available... available with a click. I want to be available in that if I am sitting in a bar, anyone can come up to me, that any girl can come up to me and ask me, I don't know, “Would you like to have a drink with me?”, “Can I have your number?”, whatever. Which doesn't happen anymore anyway, but... I would like to be available like that. But I don't want to be available for someone who can just swipe on me.

Host: Yes, yes, okay. Now, you said that a couple of girls screenshotted your Tinder and then sent it to you on Instagram. Did those same girls, for example, message you directly on Instagram?

Bojan: You mean directly on Tinder?

Host: Yes. No. Yes. Or directly on Instagram. Let's say, okay, on Tinder, if you didn't swipe them, they couldn't get to you...

Bojan: Yeah, probably then they wouldn't be able to.

Host: But then they wrote to you on Instagram, probably in some, I don't know, wishful thinking to get in touch with you. Why do you think they don't go directly to Instagram? Why... Seeing you on Tinder gave them a green light: "Oh, in fact, he is free, I can write to him."

Bojan: Maybe. But I also think it is a much easier way to just communicate something that already exists, than to start a conversation yourself. That's the same as, I don't know, I think most of the time, if we're sliding into someone's DMs, we're sliding through some story first or something you can reply to. It's much easier to reply back to something they've posted, than starting a conversation from scratch, where you let the person know you've come with the purpose that you want to get to know them and initiate a relationship. Like that looks so innocent: I'm just replying to what you posted.

Host: Can you explain to me this game of sliding in the DMs, because I'm a bit out of the loop?

Bojan: Okay. Honestly, I don't know what can I tell you, because I don't practice it at such a level either. I have two ways to slide into the DMs, I think. One is that if I see something on a story that I actually find interesting or funny, I slide into the DMs and I don't really mean to initiate anything else. And I just comment on what went on there, and sometimes a really interesting conversation starts afterwards. But sometimes you really do just reply, because why not?

Host: Okay. You've camouflaged it so well now that no girl will be able to tell exactly what you want the next time you slide.

Bojan: Yes.

Host: Good. But what do you think happened to the actual old school approach towards a girl or towards a guy in person?

Bojan: I mean, it has changed completely, but now, basically, now that I think about it, I wouldn't dare say which way. I definitely think it is much easier if you see someone outside and you like them, wait until you get home and text them on Instagram, "Hey, saw you in town." Or whatever. "Would you like to go for a coffee with me?" Asking someone out for coffee rather than actually approaching them.

On the other hand, it seems to me that since we are all so exposed on these social networks, giving our followers the impression that they are somehow present in our lives, letting them into all kinds of situations, so that I could say that people feel as if they're already your friends somehow, before they even know you. So maybe in a way... basically, I will say, I think it's much easier for people to get to you at parties now, because they feel that they are somehow already connected, or that they already know something about you and can initiate a conversation based on something you do or post and share on your social networks. In the city, when you see someone, it's easier to wait until you get home and then write to them on Instagram.

But the last time I went out for ice cream with a friend, a dude actually came along and he was like, "Hi, can I just grab you for a second?" and I thought that some Jehovah's Witness was going to start selling some books there. And the guy actually came and told my friend that he couldn't resist, because he liked her so much that he just came to ask for her contact, to take her out for a drink and I was like "Wow, what a gentleman."

Host: Plus you were there.

Bojan: I was there. The first thing he asked, he was very polite, the first thing he asked was if we were a couple. I said no, go ahead. And he was, indeed, extremely kind. A very polite guy.

Host: And did she give it to him?

Bojan: Hey, she gave him her Facebook, I think. I don't know if they went out after that, I have no idea. But it was pretty impressive for me, he got respect points from me.

Host: Cool. How do you act if you see one girl somewhere and you like her?

Bojan: I usually try to find out who the girl is as quickly as possible, then sneak into some of the places where she's hanging around, you know?

Host: Aha, oh, but that's...

Bojan: I mean, ok, that sounded a little bit creepy now.

Host: No, no, it's fine.

Bojan: I watched two episodes of that show, 'She'...

Host: ‘She'?

Bojan: Isn't 'She' the series?

Host: ‘You'?

Bojan: ‘You'. That, yes, sorry. Yeah, I've just realised that I've been that dude, very creepy.

Host: They're probably people you have something in common with, you don't just...

Bojan: Yes, I didn't mean like sneaking in, just going out somewhere, but I meant more along the lines of, ok, now I see she's going to Kino Šiška for an event and then I will go there on purpose, even if I wasn't planning to otherwise. For example, you just invite a friend for a beer and watch out for where she is.

Host: How would you describe your love life or the current situation?

Bojan: I am extremely single. I don't know what you call it. Single and ready to mingle.

Host: To mingle.

Bojan: But actually, I don't know, I'm not looking for anything. I'm in a period now in which I'm like, trying to devote myself as much as possible to music and all that. So I try to be as creative as possible and not let any unnecessary thoughts distract me from being creative. But if anything ever happens, I'm always open to socialising.

Host: Since we were just talking about Tinder earlier. Tinder is also often associated with certain modern relationships, which often have some negative connotations. Undefined relationships and indecisiveness. Blablabla. Fuckboys, etc. But do you think this is really a new culture?

Bojan: From what I hear from acquaintances who live in slightly bigger countries, Tinder is actually just there as a means to get to non-committal sex very quickly. In Slovenia... given that I've never actually used it properly, I don't know exactly. But I suppose, knowing people who are in serious relationships, that people here take it a bit more as... actually seeing someone, they might like each other and go out and get to know each other. But there are almost certainly a lot of people who are only there for the sex. I mean...

Host: Which is not necessarily a bad thing.

Bojan: No, I mean, I don't think it's bad at all, really, because if two people are physically attracted to each other and if they are actually safe in their physical relationship, which is to say, approaching the matter safely, I see absolutely no problem with that, honestly.

Host: Do you have any personal objections, like what you wouldn't do in a relationship or romance? Given that so many things are so okay and acceptable nowadays and things are...

Bojan: What do you mean?

Host: I don't know.

Bojan: Be more specific.

Host: Let's say open relationships, cheating...

Bojan: Aha. Okay, I've practically only been in a serious relationship once and when I was in the serious relationship I would never have thought of an open relationship and I never cheated. It honestly seems to me that if two people date in an open relationship and it works for them or rather, it suits them, then I have no problem. But if two people are in a monogamous relationship, cheating is one thing that's very, very wrong to me, I do not support it at all. So, I have nothing against open unions, I would not practice them myself. At least not for now. I have a very negative attitude towards cheating.

Host: Personally, I think Slovenia is totally too small for cheating in general, we don't approve of it.

Bojan: Absolutely.

Host: But how do you think this even works? People still do it.

Bojan: Hey, in fact, people do it full on. I mean, I have a big circle of people around me and I hear many stories and I, personally, with this anxiety that I have inside, I couldn't even manage these master plans and combine multiple hidden lives. I don't know. But some people actually enjoy it very much.

Host: You really have to have a lot of time to do that. It must be a hobby for you.

Bojan: It must be, I guess, a hobby for you, but you must really not feel sorry for your partner. Because you always find out in the end, undoubtedly always. Never...

Host: I think you find out before you even cheat. For example, when we were looking for a girl to go on a blind date with you the other day, a colleague contacted a girl. Before she even heard back from her, that girl's brother told her that he already knew she'd been looking for his sister. So within fifteen minutes it got around. So, let's say, one example of how quickly information gets around Slovenia.

Bojan: Well, here we go. Pretty awkward.

Host: Considering you're a young musician and I kind of feel like you musicians have a reputation for certain qualities when it comes to women and relationships. Would you say that you are the usual, stereotypical womaniser, someone who breaks women's hearts? Because I'm sure someone would believe that you are.

Bojan: Yes, I know that too, they are convinced that I am. I think, that at least here, some Casanova style Mick Jagger rock'n'roll version is impossible, because it's one thing to be in Los Angeles one day and New York the next. I would absolutely not call myself a womaniser. I choose the relationships I have very carefully. But I am very flirtatious. I do very much enjoy flirting, actually, not at all because I would have expected any starting point from this, we know what I mean by that. But just for that, because it's actually a lot of fun to give someone some playful signals and receive them back. I think it's a bit like, it gets your adrenaline flowing a bit, it's not harmful at all, I'm sure it releases hormones of happiness and joy along with it, so I think that it's only healthy and that people should be more flirtatious in general.

Host: How do you make yourself more flirtatious? Let's say, it seems to me that it really depends on someone's nature.

Bojan: It's in our natures, but I think people just need to relax and open up a bit. I think most people have feelings inside them, but they don't dare to express them. I mean, if I like... if I like a girl, I have no problem with that, if we look at each other, catch each other's eyes, I'll smile nicely, I don't know, if it's appropriate at the moment, I don't know, I'll wink. Or something. You know what I mean? Not winking like this, "What's up babygirl?", but in a way that is playfully flirtatious. Whatever. I think people need to realise that these things are not a crime and that someone won't hold a grudge against you if you smile at them beautifully, [or] if you initiate a small conversation, because that is just a small part of our lives and [we are just] creating some bonds, so I think showing emotion is a very important thing.

Host: But what if I linked it to, let's say, cheating? How would you feel if your partner or you flirted with others while you were in a relationship? Would you consider that cheating?

Bojan: I wouldn't consider it cheating, but it would probably bother me, so I'd want to talk about it.

Host: How would you defend your generation, to which perhaps the older generations ascribe many prejudices, looking at the way we... what kind of relationships we have, how we socialise?

Bojan: I think it is very easy for each generation to look at the younger generation and... to look down on the younger generation and judge them, because maybe things were a little different in their time. All these things are very much linked to the whole lifestyle we have. It's not just the way young people are in relationships today, or the kind of life as a couple they have, because it's all connected to our whole lifestyle and living on the internet, travelling the world at every moment and blablabla. I find that very hypocritical of them, given that they are a generation, or okay, maybe they're a bit younger than this generation, but they were nevertheless this certain generation of this free love, psychedelia, who used sex and drugs to push back on the war. So it seems to me that this particular delinquency was far from being invented by us but it dates back to ancient times. So I think for all people, who think that young people today have invented some perversions, open relationships, gayness, and so on should read a book from ancient Greece or Rome and see, that Caligula³ lived all this two thousand years ago.

Host: Just a little less hidden, I guess.

Bojan: Yes, maybe.

Host: Would you be up for a challenge? Since you said you're not a womaniser.

Bojan: Yes.

Host: I have a BuzzFeed test here.

Bojan: BuzzFeed test?

Host: Are you a fuckboy? Do you want to take it?

Bojan: Okay, let's go.

Host: Have you ever sent a "You up?" text? "Are you sleeping?"

Yes, once. I promise.

No, never.

Yeah, that's my go-to move.

Bojan: No. I don't think so, really.

Host: Have you ever cheated on someone?

Bojan: No.

Host: You said it. "Have you ever sent an unwanted picture of your "little friend"?

Bojan: No.

Host: Have you ever sexted more than one person at the same time?

Bojan: Yes.

Host: Have you slept with two people in the same week?

Bojan: No.

Host: Have you ever made up an excuse to leave immediately after sex?

Bojan: I think, yes.

Host: Have you ever convinced someone that you didn't need to use a condom?

Bojan: No.

Host: I would never. Okay. Have you ever posted a picture without your shirt on?

Bojan: Yes, indeed. In fact, I must have been shirtless a couple of times in the stories now, but I posted one shirtless photo two years ago.

Host: Ok.

Bojan: At sea.

Host: Yes, yes. Do you think all of your exes are "crazy bitches"?

Bojan: No.

Host: Have you ever asked a girl to send nudes?

Bojan: Yes.

Host: Have you ever bragged about girls you've been with?

Bojan: Like openly?

Host: Yes.

Bojan: No.

Host: Have you complained about being "friendzoned"?

Bojan: Almost certainly.

Host: Ok. Have you ever sent that emoji of a monkey covering its eyes?

Bojan: No.

Host: Do you have any...

Bojan: What is this monkey's thing?

Host: I don't know, maybe... it's some fuckboy hallmark, I don't know.

Do you have any V-neck tees?

Bojan: Mhm.

Host: Do you wear them?

Bojan: My mum bought them for me, so I guess it's not really fuckboyish.

Host: Yes. Do you have any tattoos that are only visible while wearing a V-neck?

Bojan: No.

Host: Do you have any tattoos?

Bojan: No, I don't.

Host: Have you ever slid into a girl's Twitter DMs?

Bojan: I don't have Twitter.

Host: What about Instagram? We said yes.

Bojan: Yes.

Host: Are you in a band? Yees.

Bojan: Yes.

Host: You see, the hallmark of fuckboys. Are you a DJ?

Bojan: No. I mean, if she wants, I can be a DJ.

Host: Could be: "No, but my friend is this like super poppin' DJ".

Bojan: Yes, it could, it's true.

Host: Oh, it doesn't work.

Bojan: Can't fix it anymore?

Host: No. What are Top-Sider⁴?

Bojan: I don't know.

Host: We'll put... oh, it's some shoes.

Bojan: Then I'm sure not, because I only wear one pair of trainers, and that's these.

Host: I don't think that's it. Have you ever introduced a girl you've been dating as your "friend"?

Bojan: No.

Host: Have you ever randomly texted a girl you booty called more than a year ago?

Bojan: Booty called? Wait, what if I what?

Host: If you've been with a girl then, after a long time, you write her a random message.

Bojan: Almost certainly, yes.

Host: But were you genuinely interested in how her life was going or just a little bit because you saw her on Instagram?

Bojan: I think only because I saw her on Instagram.

Host: Have you ever travelled to Southeast Asia?

Bojan: No.

Host: Have you ever explained craft beer to a woman?

Bojan: Let's say yes, I think, but...

Host: Yes, but she was genuinely interested.

Bojan: Let's put down "She was genuinely interested", yes.

Host: Ok.

Bojan: Because I don't really know what craft beer is myself. But I mean... I think one of them asked me once why I was drinking it, because she found it very disgusting.

Host: Have you ever based an outfit on one of Kanye West's outfits?

Bojan: Oh, no, unfortunately.

Host: Do you own a hoodie that costs more than some people's rent?

Bojan: No. If you add up all the hoodies, they don't cost like a tenth of the rent.

Host: Have you ever ghosted someone?

Bojan: This means...

Host: That you suddenly stopped replying to them. The girls. Did you have a legitimate reason or did your phone die?

Bojan: Sure... yeah I did, but not like that, ghosting is probably for a very long time, no? To disappear completely?

Host: I don't know.

Bojan: Or just that, I don't know. To disappear completely?

Host: You disappear completely.

Bojan: No, this not.

Host: No.

Bojan: Just for a day or so, I took a creative break.

Host: Oh, good. It's not ghosting. Have you ever gone to a party with one girl and left with another?

Bojan: No. I go practically alone to parties almost always.

Host: And then home.

Bojan: Yes.

Host: Have you ever hit on a girlfriend's... one of your girlfriend's friends?

Bojan: No. Maybe after, when she was already... Not when we were together.

Host: Ok. What about one of your close friend's exes?

Bojan: That... no, homeboys, no, no, a homeboy is a true friend, I'd never do that in my life.

Host: Did you ever say you didn't have an STD and you did?

Bojan: God, no.

Host: And... You are probably a decent human being. Here's the proof. Live. Now no one can accuse you of being one... if anyone says anything to you.

Bojan: It's official! I'm not a fuckboy.

Host: Alright, that's it. Now, to finish, we have a couple of other unpopular opinions which I have chosen, and you will comment whether you agree or disagree, if you find it very stupid, or if there is any truth in it. First: people drink gin because it is fashionable.

Bojan: I think some people do enjoy gin. [But] I think it's disgusting, honestly. But I think some people find gin good.

Host: Ok, I agree too, because I find it good myself.

Bojan: Aha, ok.

Host: Star Wars is not really good.

Bojan: I'm not the right one to answer that, because I actually never watched it. I watched the old one a hundred years ago, they were pretty good.

Host: For those times. I mean, I'm not really interested, but maybe I'm...

Bojan: I've honestly never been drawn to Star Wars at all.

Host: Yes, I can understand why someone would think that. Pineapple on pizza?

Bojan: I haven't tried. But it looks and sounds disgusting to me.

Host: I've tried it, but it's not so bad. Although it's true that I ate it in America, where everything else was so bad that it wasn't so disgusting in comparison.

Bojan: Okay, fair. I think, if so many people eat it, it probably doesn't.

Host: Yes. Give it a try.

Bojan: I mean, there must be something to it.

Host: It's a bit sweet. Like in a Chinese restaurant, that sweet and sour...

Bojan: Yeah, I'm not exactly very... yeah, I don't think it would be good for me, but look, maybe, I mean, I'll give it a try sometime. I'll tell you.

Host: Please do. Here. Tinder themed. LinkedIn is a better choice for dating than Tinder.

Bojan: LinkedIn? Isn't that for business?

Host: Yes. Here someone thinks it's a better way to do things.

Bojan: I have no idea. No, I don't think so.

Host: Maybe you can find someone in your...

Bojan: Business. Yes, maybe.

Host: And the Foo Fighters are better than Nirvana.

Bojan: Never in life. They are sick, but not...

Host: They are not better.

Bojan: No.

Host: Ok. Do you have any more shoutouts to say?

Bojan: Shoutout?

Host: What would you like to highlight at the end of the podcast?

Bojan: Well, let people be aware. Maybe now really isn't the time to be very flirtatious and go into close spaces with strangers. Nothing, be healthy, love each other, and be flirtatious but with a mask, and listen to Joker Out.

Host: Smile with your eyes.

Bojan: Yes. Smile with your eyes.

Host: Bye.

Bojan: Bye bye.

¹You can watch the 'Bojan Cvjetićanin Cosmopolitan blind date' video with subtitles in English, as well as in several other languages, on our YouTube channel here.

²'Frendi in Flirt' ('Friends and Flirting') is a Slovenian website dedicated to people looking for dating and adventure who are over 18 years old, who want to meet new people to socialize and chat or find the love of their life.

³Caligula was the third Roman emperor. Known ancient historical sources have handed down an image of Caligula as a despot, emphasising his extravagance, eccentricity and depravity.

⁴Sperry or Sperry Top-Sider is an American boat shoe company.

#bojan cvjetićanin #bojan cvjeticanin #joker out #Youtube

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dragongirltongue · 5 months

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New Pinned post <3

Hi there, the name is Zelda, or one of like, 20 other names that may or may not be listed somewhere around here. If you know a name I go by that isn't findable here don't use it. <3

I'm bigender which is made up of girl and fem6oy, as such I use she/her and sometimes he/him pronouns when I'm feeling fem6oy enough <3

I'm in my 30s, not getting more specific than that until I decide it's not true enough to change it, don't try to find my exact age as I don't like sharing that information publicly, I don't even update it on my birthday <3

I'm a polyamorous bisexual voraphile freak and if you're over 18 you're welcome to talk to me about how much of a freak I am. I love to flirt and encourage it. Also happy to share my Other Blog with anyone interested, again as long as you're of age. <3

I'm a film graduate and currently working on doing something with that experience as well as working on a superhero comic and a 2D zelda style game. Feel free to bug me about any of those I love to discuss writing and media and want to encourage media literacy. <3

I'm also an ex-jehovahs witness and as a result I'm hugely into the holiday season in a very against my old god kinda way. Also big into sinning <3

Also I'm like, a dragon in probably an otherkin/thetadelta kinda way, like, it's core to who I am and how I understand myself so yeah. Despite this my fursona is a fox, the dragon in my icon is literally me <3

I also draw sometimes and when I do it'll be posted to @dragongirldrawings but always reblogged here too.

Also I'm a member of a plural system, feel free to check out the rest of the system over here @haven-sys <3

Further on the identity weirdness I'm an imaginary friend for the person who used to inhabit this body, they've been gone for like, over 20 years so it's not really relevant but I have started embracing my nature as a fictional creation, it's comforting.

So yeah that's me, hiii I love you all <3

this post is specifically a6out tum6lr user Zelda dragongirltongue

DNI list under the read more.

lmao imagine if I actually made one of those finally, that's how you'd know I've been replaced with an evil clone or something.

That being said if you're looking at my blog to send me an ask or dm about what someone gets off to please understand unless they're actively hurting someone I rly don't care. I have a lot of ignored and blocked anons about this.

This goes double if the person you're trying to alert me to is trans femme, we don't play that game here, especially given that I know I've been targetted for things as simple as engaging in vore the wrong way for some people or whatever.

Like, I just want to make it clear I rly don't give a fuck what another adult does in the bedroom, I rly don't care if the bedroom happens to include their blog and I rly don't care if they like to flirt about it with other adults on this website.

Also if your pinned post is a callout for anyone about anything it's likely to set off my paranoia around you, which is to say I will not be able to trust you if this is the case even if it's for someone who's actually a danger to a community, like, actively.

Like, this ain't a moral stance or anything, it's a mental health thing. I see that you want to make your first point of contact into a crosshair on someone else I'm gonna be scared you're gonna aim at me next even if it's completely reasonable that you'd never find anything objectionable with me. It scares me and I'm gonna spend every interaction walking on egg shells around you cos what if you're digging for dirt, like, I got no way of knowing.

Anyway as the opening joke implies I don't see any worth in having a list of things to not interact with me over cos the lived experience on this planet is so full of nuance and I've formed deem friendships with people who'd probably have avoided me if I had a DNI and they cared about it.

I think DNIs are dumb but this feels like a space to talk about some general limits on what I'm gonna put up with on this website. I'm just here for a good time with other freaks, anything else is optional. If you want to drag me into your discourse at this point then I guess this is whre I ask you to Do Not Interact. To anyone else, I love yall <3

If you've been directed here after sending an ask my way please apologize for wasting my time [here]

tl;dr DNIs are dumb but don't drag me into your personal grievances with others.

this post is still specifically a6out tum6lr user Zelda dragongirltongue

#6aaah #last updated dec 16

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obsolescent · 3 months

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THE WAY I AGREE W YOU !!! also i think you previously mentioned something about leon desiring a softer, thicker partner and !!! imagining leon seeing a woman (bc im a woman and self indulgent) and seeing her hips and thinking about how she has child-bearing hips and he’s soooo down bad. especially older! leon !! bc at that point in his life he’s ready to settle down with someone.

also also also i was gonna say that he like clvlv requires a family too but then i got scared bc of conflicting opinions but im so glad that you feel that way too. i imagine that since leon lost his parents and has lost so so much in his life, he wants to give the world to his kids. he’d be such a good dad. girl dad leon brainrot rnnnnnn

and also !! vkvkv i love your take on leon sooooo much.

YEAH YEAH I think he would just…him loving physical touch and he would just see the indentation of his fingers/his hold on his partner and just. Yeah.

18+ due to discussions of sexual activities!

Me being a they/them with child bearing hips !,?,!/(/$.? Like hiiii Leon (I know he’s got a breeding kink like I just KNOW it)

He wouldn’t be able to even stop those thoughts either, he’d see someone he finds attractive and the thought would just be like oh. Fuck. !,?!/(/$/(!.$:) the thoughts would definitely ramp up as he got older as his need for a family grew!

I know many would say he wouldn’t want to bring a kid into the world knowing what he knows, but he also knows he would protect his family with every fiber of his being and he knows he could do if after all he’s been through, all he’s survived.

He would be a terrific parent and I can see him like. Teaching his daughter how to protect herself when he isn’t around, teaching her fighting techniques and probably even getting her a gun for her 18th birthday or something 😭 once again he knows how fucked up the world is and he won’t always be around, but he also knows that her being a woman also puts her in danger and he’ll be damned if anyone crosses his child!!!

Anyways. Yep. So much brainrot like, I gotta write a story out about him settling down and raising a family and and. &:(,!.(/)/)!:

But okay I love your takes too!!! Like we’re definitely on the same wavelength 😌🤝😌 fjgsjssfshsg I’ve loved your asks and discussing this with you :) if you ever wanna DM just send a message!! Or honestly if you got any requests for any stories I’d love to hear them too!!

#o asks #o talking #o text #leon kennedy #leon s kennedy #resident evil #leon kennedy x reader

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frosty-sneasel · 11 days

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Intro, I guess?

Hello! I'm Lumi.- Or Frosty. The Sneasel's Camellia. You might know me as @battle-subway-ghost's friend lol, I still have his account password and everything! 😉

Accidentally deleted my account, decided to remake it now though. You can't keep me away forever.

Used to be a Pokemon trainer, I've retired from that though. Still sometimes battle if someone asks, but I'm just trying to live a calm life now! ♥

Nowadays I'm a freelance artist/graphic designer (sometimes!) I have my own professional accounts, this rotumblr is just for me to have fun. (If you do want to contact me for commissions though... 👀 [email protected])

Anyways, here's my trainer card!

My pokemon:

Camellia the Sneasel (♀), Aspen the Glaceon (♂), Cookies & Cream the Vanilluxe (⚧) and Zena the Beheeyem (♀)

Hello! This is the OOC part of the introduction >:) I follow from @act11as! Muse is an adult, mod is a minor, don't be weird, etc.

Please note the blanket unreality warning in the description, I do not tag #unreality to avoid flooding the tag, but I do try to tag all non-out of character posts with #pkmn irl in case you need to block things from your dashboard at times! On that same note, OOC posts will be tagged as such, and I will mark them with green text (though often not past the first line, because it can be grating to look at after a while)

All trigger warnings will be tagged as "[word] tw" for the sake of consistency. And if I forget to tag something, please shoot me a dm or an ask!

Additionally: Please note that I am autistic and very chronically ill. I may have to end things earlier than they were planned to be because I just suddenly had a flare-up, and I often misinterpret/forget things, o7 please feel free to remind/correct me if I do!

Guidelines? I guess?

Literally any kind of pokemon irl blog can interact! Sentient pokemon, eebydeebies, evil teams, whatever. I'm chill with anyone, though the muse may not be, keep this in mind. If you want to do something, send me a dm! I'm more than happy to discuss things ^^

IN CHARACTER anon hate, be it just being an ass, homophobia, etc. etc. are perfectly fine. Note that I probably wont respond to all, especially if it seems to go a bit too far.

There'll probably be more to add later- but for now, here's the copy and pasted version :3

#pkmn irl #pokemon irl #rotumblr #rotomblr #pokeblogging #blog intro #// SHEEESS BACKKKK :3

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trans-axolotl · 1 year

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for anon asking about NPD/ASPD resources

For context, anon sent in an ask searching for nonstigmatizing resources for support with PD diagnoses and other stigmatized diagnoses.

And this is such a good ask--it is so fucking frustrating and dehumanizing to try to search for support when half the stuff that pops up is using really cruel language or just directed towards family and friends. The community definitely deserves better, both when it comes to the way psych professionals perpetuate stigma and in regards to the prejudice and sanism that shows up in other communities in our lives. Unfortunately, I don't have a ton of resources on hand, although I do know one good support group. The rest of the resources I know of are kind of mediocre or not PD specific, so if other people could add on I would really, really appreciate it!

Neuromancers runs a discord and a Cluster B peer support group that I've heard really good things about. I haven't been myself, so I can't 100 % vouch, but they're a group with abolitionist and mad pride values.

This might not be exactly what you're looking for, but it's an article exploring cultural bias in PD diagnosis that links to a lot of sources that talk about how psychiatry contributes to stigma around personality disorders. I clicked through some of the studies that it links to and it does use a lot of medicalized language, but I thought I would link the article anyway in case it's ever helpful to have academic sources to show to other people.

Also not exactly what you're looking for, but another article debunking some of the common talking points about NPD in pop psychology (Content warning that it is discussing some very ableist myths in the context of challenging them)

Last sort of general resources for peer support that I have some trust that they are PD friendly are the Wildflower Alliance and Hearing Voices Network Groups. Wildflower alliance groups offer a lot of different general peer support and I have one friend with NPD who has spoken positively of those spaces. Hearing Voices Network groups can vary a lot depending on location, so defintely plan to email ahead, but I've been to a few groups that welcome people who generally identify as psych survivors/mad/ex patients who want to share community spaces around those values. Also want to share is the neurodivergent friendly workbook of DBT skills (the link is to buy it directly from the creator but if anyone who is interested can't afford it rn, dm me and I'll send you a pdf.) Again, I know this is really not super relevant to what you asked for but is one of the less stigmatizing, less medicalizing workbooks I can find for accessing info about coping skills and this is one of my general favorite support resources.

Overall I'm really sorry that I don't have better resources to offer you, and I think that really should be a sign to the mad pride/psych abolition/peer support community that we need to do a lot better job in making sure that our spaces are explicitly welcome to people with stigmatized PD diagnoses. The work shouldn't have to be on you to try to navigate these spaces and figure out whether or not you're welcome, and any spaces that offer peer support, are aligned with mad pride and psych abolition, really should be doing the work to make sure lateral violence and sanism aren't being perpetuated.

followers, esp followers with lived experience, please add on!

#antipsych #psych abolition #mad studies #mad pride #cluster b #npd #aspd #spent a bit of time looking through my clinical databases as well but could not easily find any articles #that weren't fucking awful #also to clarify: i have lived experience being diagnosed with a cluster b personality disorder #but don't currently identify with that diagnosis or really interact in a lot of pd specific spaces or know #tons about what community preferences and community consensus on things r #so this is def something where i would love input from people with relevant lived experience!

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moonlitkilljoy · 1 year

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Lo and behold! i’ve finally finished making it, the promised list of Pacific Rim fic recs for anon :-) everyone thank @ihavenomoralsss for proofreading this for me!

There’s a good chance most people who've read any amount of newmann fanfiction will have read the first two on this list, as they’re found on the first and fifth pages of the newmann ship tag on ao3 when its sorted by most kudos descending– however i’ve included them anyway because they’re there for a very good reason (which is that they’re FANTASTIC). also, i've grouped all of the "pov outsider" fics together at the end of this post, as they pretty much make up one third of the list– which feels like it warrants it's own section. feel free to dm me or send me an ask to let me know of your thoughts about any of these (or just pacific rim in general!!)! without further ado, may i present to thou, 10 fantastic newmann fics

It’s All in the Hands of a Lazy Projector by patster223

“Hermann is cursed as a child so that he may never remember anyone he meets. Theoretically, this should make falling in love impossible, but then he meets (and meets and meets and meets) Newton Geiszler.”

~10k words, 1 chapter, rated T; exactly what the summary says, it’s an au in which hermann is cursed to forget everyone he meets, it centers around newt and hermanns interactions and how they manage to grow close despite this

if i had to choose a single favorite pacific rim fanfic it’d probably have to be this one. it’s gorgeously written and tackles some themes that hit very close to home for me, personally. i’ve struggled with memory loss for a very long time now, and this fic manages to encapsulate that experience through the lens of magical-realism in a way i’ve never seen captured in any context. i left a comment to that effect (under a pseudonym because i rarely log into ao3 on my phone) and the author’s response is something that still makes me emotional pretty much every time i look at it, “I wanted to imagine a world where memory still mattered, even if it wasn’t remembered. And now, years later, I think that it does. You and I and Hermann hold memory in our bodies and our minds, even if what’s being held isn’t an exact picture or description, but rather an emotion or a question. Memory still has to matter to those with memory loss, even if we end up experiencing it differently.” so, this is not only a recommendation for quality, but also from a very personal place— it’s a fic that addresses the concept of memory loss through a lens of comfort and hope, which it is so rarely seen through, and does it phenomenally. if anyone looking at this post were to read one fic and only one fic from this list i’d want it to be this one. it also characterizes newt and hermann very well and i love their dynamic in it, it’s PHENOMENAL

Letters From Berlin by spenshi

“Newton keeps in touch with his family when he's shipped off to the Shatterdome. Jacob and Illia send care packages to the K-Science Lab.”

~12k words, 1 chapter, rated T; once more, exactly what the summary says– newt sends letters to his family and they send him packages. eventually hermann starts sending them letters (+ emails) as well :]

i read this one most recently out of all the others so it’s the freshest in my memory :-) it’s extremely homely and heartwarming!! additionally, it includes some really fun and sweet interactions between newt’s family and hermann. OH! and, of course, some very fun characterization of newt’s family

Plausible Possibility by cissues / @cacaesthesia

“Newt and Hermann experience some odd post-drift effects.”

~1k words, 1 chapter, rated G; a little exploration of ghost-drift

short and sweet! absolutely fucking adorable too. plus, this contains some headcanons/a discussion of sexuality that i was delighted to find very relatable (as an aromantic person)

Red Patent by highseize

“It's been months since the ocean closed up. Nothing will take this from her now.”

~2k words, 1 chapter, rated G; a snapshot of what mako’s life looks like after the events of the movie ^^

a rare non-hermann-and-newt-centered fic on this list!! this one actually centers around mako :D it’s adorable and i love mako with my entire heart, especially this depiction of her

fool by kaijusalad

“Newton is going to die thinking no-one left on this Earth loves him. (Fool.) He can't have that.”

~6k words, 1 chapter, rated T; hermann believes that seeking out hannibal chau and drifting with a kaiju brain once more will kill newt, and acts accordingly

i LOVE the way this fic is formatted and written– the word choice and unique use of italics and parentheses is incredible and works so well. it describes every action and scene so gorgeously and it just. man. here’s a small except devoid of context that i think showcases this perfectly: “His words are hollow, anyway. They hang in the air, lies filled with helium, a new year's resolution, an 'I'll quit smoking'. (God is real in belief; maybe if he believes in them hard enough they'll come true, and isn't that something for a man who works in numbers to think?)”

One day from lonely by Raehimura

“Hermann is standing outside Newton Geiszler’s private quarters, bony ankles poking out from under too-short standard-issue sweatpants, his hair a wreck and his red-ringed eye still sore, with a lifetime of stolen memories in his head. What if Newt isn’t there? What if he’s sleeping? Or, worse, what if he is waiting on the other side of the door with his own stolen memories fresh on his mind? Above all he remembers, sudden and frighteningly clear: This is not what they do.”

~2.5k words, 1 chapter, rated G; another very interesting exploration of newt and hermann post-drift

i disagree a little bit with some of the characterization in this fic (particular, newt thinking hermann hates him. i think newt very well knows that hermann’s very fond of him) but it’s a great read nonetheless! the best word to describe it would probably be “cozy”

This is a Totally Normal Thing for Friends to Do by SolarMorrigan / @solarmorrigan

“Hermann and Newt don't talk about it (until they do)”

~21k words, 4 chapters, rated T; a fake dating au in which hermann’s dad nags him about not having found a partner yet and hermann panics, telling him that he actually does have a partner just to get him to asking about it, but it backfires when lars expresses interest in meeting him. newt offers to play the part of partner, hijinks and relationship progression ensue. this fic also has an explicit sequel, if that’s your kind of thing

THIS FIC IS SO FUCKING GOOD. there were multiple times where i reacted out loud to things that happened in the fic– most notably a series of “holy fucking shit”s while eating lunch with some friends. it’s adorable and includes some transmasc newt content :3 this fic also includes hermann snapping and standing up to his shithead dad and its GREAT. one of my absolute favorite pacrim fics ever, i can’t recommend it enough

POV OUTSIDER FICS:

HR Complaints by IDoNotBitMyThumbAtYou / @idonotbitemythumbatyou

“Manny Flores has been with the PPDC for nearly a decade by the time he’s transferred to Hong Kong. He just wants to do his job. And he’s good at it. But when he receives the 15th complaint from one Dr. Hermann Gottlieb in only three days, he finds his patience running thin. He wonders which of the two scientists would be more of a nightmare to cohabitate a working space with: Dr. Gottlieb - sender of endless petty complaints, or Dr. Geiszler, their hapless subject. (...)”

~3k words, 1 chapter, unrated (probably G or T); hermann and newt’s relationship through the eyes of someone reading the (non-serious) complaints that hermann sends to hr

i spent three uninterrupted hours looking for this fic to link it here and it was ABSOLUTELY worth it. this fic is so fun, and it uses my favorite trope of all time!! i’m an absolute sucker for “pov outsider” type fics <3 the characterization is phenomenal, i love the oc from whose pov we view the story, and some of the lines made me actually audibly laugh. definitely another one of my absolute favorites. i think i sent a screenshot of the first sentence from the following lines to virtually everyone i know: “After another few weeks of complaints (“Dr. Geiszler asked me if I have any tattoos.” “Dr. Geiszler made an offensive tweet alluding to my personal style. I have attached a link.” “Dr. Geiszler has named his invention ‘the milking machine.’”) And continued insistence that no disciplinary action be taken, Manny was starting to suspect that the latter was closer to the truth: these were the missives of someone deeply, inconveniently in love. Christ, Manny was half in love with the guy himself at this point.” this fic rocks, do yourself a solid and please read it

On The Outside by combeferrer

“Petra Gottlieb, Hermann's mother, watches the first PPDC press conference after the world is saved and notices her son, particularly his relationship with his fellow scientist.”

~1k words, 1 chapter, rated G; for the third and final time, exactly what the description says! newt and hermanns relationship through the eyes of hermann’s mother, who watches a press conference with her son– who she hasn’t really interacted with lately– in it

ANOTHER GREAT FIC!! I love this characterization of newt and hermann’s relationship, and i find the premise and extremely enticing in and of itself so i won’t be saying anything more here <3

Disconnect, Connect Again by cypress_tree / @cypress-tree

“Raising Newt Geiszler has never been easy. Seeing him fall in love can be harder. The development of Newt and Hermann's relationship, from Jacob Geiszler's point-of-view.”

~13.5k words, 4 chapters, rated T; newt and hermann’s relationship through the eyes of newt’s father, over the course of 12 years

LOVE LOVE LOVE this author’s take on newt’s family. it works so well and is very enjoyable to read about. i wish i could articulate how much and why exactly i love this fic in a better manner, but i can’t quite find the right word’s ^^; i’m just going to leave it at “i love it dearly and i adore it’s depiction/interpretation of newt and hermann’s history (and present + future!)”

thank you for reading!! have a lovely day/night ^^ <3

#benny beeps #fic recs #pacific rim #pacrim #newt geiszler #hermann gottlieb #newmann #newton geiszler #kaiju bros #this is my first time making a post like this so PLEASE let me know if the way i've formatted this has rendered it unreadable

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diehardpizzer · 3 months

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Hello Everyone! I'm Bad Batter, you can also call me Natty! I am 21+, a part of the Fortress System, and we identify as Positively Plural. I'm a streamer, an artist, and just a silly guy on the internet struggling to stay out of online drama!!! Infamous for many a reasons, mostly a certain YouTube video.... This Tumblr is for friends not fools! (clowns welcome)

My Youtube My Twitter My Toyhouse My Pronoun Page My Kofi Want to sent me asks but can't? Try my CuriousCat!

Some content warnings! (NOT A DNI LIST) -I am very openly pro mspec queers, bi les/gay people and endo systems. I am VERY against label policing, and I will post pro-x positivity posts from time to time so be warned if you disagree. I am okay with people interacting with me, but I am NOT here to educate you or fight. I am trying to stay away from online drama and debates.

-I am an adult and will sometimes interact with and reblog adult topics but I will ALWAYS tag them ! #suggestive #drug use or #kinda sussy for work are my main tags ! I will also tag #flashing lights and #medical ! If you need anything tagged please ask or DM me ! <3

-If I've done something wrong, or you've seen something said about me, please feel free to DM me, or send an ask! I will give as much context as I can and I am open to explaining! Friend, moot, or not. My one hard do not follow boundary: -I am anti-anti, this is not up for discussion. If you believe in harassing people and you think its okay to tell anyone to sh, commit sui, send ppl gore, or intentionally trigger people, please do not follow me. Anyway, that's all folks! Thanks for stopping by my blog

#diehardpizzer #intro post #sysblr #streamer

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salthien · 2 months

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do u have any favorite hollow knight ships or headcanons? :)

yes have you heard about quirrelhol- [cartoonishly large anvil drops directly onto my skull]

(discussion below the cut - I've censored character names/keywords with periods so this (hopefully) doesn't show up in tags as it's entirely just me rambling.)

The requisite #1 Gay Bugs In My Heart aside, there are a handful of others I do care about! I really am fond of She.o and the Nailsm.ith. what if two big round bugs fell in love over a shared calling to Create and the finding of purpose beyond achieving 'perfection' in their respective crafts. I've a mind to go through their fic tag at some point. I'm curious about Lacen.et but it's hard for me to get into it with zero story context, so my interest in that will probably be very passive until The Day Of Reckoning (SS release date).

I honestly don't have much else romantically I'm very into - most other ships I'm either of the "it's cute/fine/funny, I can see it" or "not my thing, but live your life" camp, since I'm not generally a multishipper and Quir.rel and Holl.ow seem like the most popular people to throw other characters at. Generally not a big 'dead dove'/'problematic' ship fan, and I won't touch that pressurized can of worms any further than that. I'm not here to evangelize or condemn, just to do my thing like everyone else! If anyone really really needs to know my opinions on a specific ship, send me an ask/DM me and I can give my honest answer (I just don't want to kick up any drama, even accidentally.)

That being said, I am incredibly interested in explorations of quite a few of the nonromantic relationships in HK - I love anything to do with the Dreamers (Her.rah <3333) and postgame stuff with the siblings. I've got a long list of fics bookmarked in a Need To Read folder (includes stuff like sbab.l, Worldse.nse, Los.t Kin, etc.) and will likely have more properly-formed thoughts then, but I'm a sucker for narratives about healing and growth and general bittersweet angst-with-hope stuff so postgame fix-it stuff is probably always going to appeal to me the most.

As for headcanons, I am notoriously terrible at coming up with them myself oops. You'll notice I tend to gather what I like from fanon and mess with it in my own little sandbox (with all due credit) so common things like eight-limbed Horne.t, the Child of Three Queens lore (which I think is more cut-canon than fanon??), Quir.rel's antennae (and general elaboration on buggy qualities in general, for everyone), etc. As a personal headcanon for the Knight/Ghost of Hallown.est/whatever you wanna call our funky little player character, they are like. Absolute peak autism to me (in the absolute most loving way possible). Fully a sentient adult, but nonverbal/generally noncommunicative and not really a former-of-solid-relationships. They come and they go as they please and everyone finds them charming, even those who might not admit it right away.

I'm much better at "here is this idea, expand it" than "come up with something new from a vacuum". I will take a headcanon and run wild with it, but generating those on my own? That requires brain cells that I usually do not have a proper hold on.

Wow this got long. Anyways! them's my thoughts there's a billion of them

#sal.txt

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bravewolfvesperia · 3 months

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GETTING TO KNOW YOU.

respond to the following prompts out of character. then, tag others that you'd like to get to know a little bit better!

tagged by: @altosk tagging: @mistralxsoul, @ourvoids, @ervaurem if you haven't done this, @pclitesse if you do these!

ROLEPLAYER NAME: Shi (ShiShi is fine but I tend to go with Shi. if you're thinking Shinon from a ninth and tenth entry in a particular franchise, your brain is in the right place. namesakes and beloveds, friends)

ROLEPLAYER PRONOUNS: she/her

MUSE NAME: Yuri Lowell (and assorted others on my Tales multimuse)

PREFERRED COMMUNICATION: depends how often we talk. Tumblr DMs is easiest if we have brief conversation/plotting. Discord is preferred if we're starting to have regular conversations/lengthy conversations. I'm open to talking to people more though if they're interested, so if you do want to talk or gush about our muses or games, feel free to ask for my Discord! we don't have to already be talking a whole lot if you do want to move to Discord.

EXPERIENCE: I've been RPing for like, idk, as long as I can remember, but I started on Tumblr specifically around 2012. Before that it was things like ye wee old forums, messengers, etc. Tales experience is the same thing because I used to RP Tales on forums LOL.

PREFERRED ROLEPLAY TYPE: a mix of everything more or less. I like fluff and happy things mixed into angst, and if there's no room for happiness in a specific thread/situation, I like to have gentle/soft/emotional aspects littered around. I also try to just follow my muse's whims, so if anything suddenly spikes his rage meter, that's what we're goin' with folks.

PET PEEVES & DEALBREAKERS:

(this isn't as scary as it looks I'm sorry LOL)

ignoring my rules and asking to ship with me when your character's name is not in my ship list (yes, this includes OCs. if OCs aren't mentioned it's very likely because my muse has a very specific romantic inclination and chemistry won't trump that the muse is already leaning toward someone/other people by default. should be obvious but I literally recently on another blog had someone completely ignore that muse's ship list and still send me an anon to ask to ship with me (and the whole thing was indicative that they only wanted to write with me to ship and didn't really see my muse as their own muse but just as another tool in the shed). my ship list tends to be very tiny for any muse and I prefer it that way anyway because it wards off the idea that people are only writing with me to ship. I love shipping with certain pairs, but I don't write explicitly for that and am much more comfortable with the idea that people aren't following me to ship with me/going into things assuming they will be able to convince me into it when they would have presumably read my rules and know their character is not on that list. again, as in my rules, one-sided your-muse-likes-mine is totally fine - just don't get mad when it remains one-sided because you were warned. if your muse is on the list (for any of my muses), yes, it means I'm open to discussing it/writing it./being receptive of it.

disrespecting other writers plain for everyone to see on their dashboards. this includes saying vague shit like "there are no good (character name) muses out there". that is very much not the same as "there are no writers for this character/I can't find any of this character". that's a very intentional dig at certain character writers and implies they're not good enough for you because nobody writes that character the way you want them to (versus simply expressing a desire to write with a certain character but not finding anyone who writes them).

using my muse as a blank slate who is just a base directly off the game you probably played if you're here. if any of you have paid attention to my threads with a specific Flynn (hi Natty!), you are probably aware my muse is heavily influenced by canon side material. that stuff is a core part of my muse. my muse is not just a rip taken right out of game-only canon. the more I write, the more formed he becomes as his own individual muse. if you cannot respect that and will consider it "ooc" for my muse not to be a blank slate direct rip from canon every time I write with a new muse, that's a hard dealbreaker. (on that above note, for any Flynn writers who are unfamiliar with the canon side material that Flynn is a primary part of (i.e. very directly relative to things that affect my muse), I do not hold that against you and am completely willing to work things out with you! that shit is hard to find and is JP media only. there's a slew of side content for Vesperia that the west never got so I know many if not most people won't even know a lot of it exists)

PLOTS OR MEMES: I do both, but I'm more likely to be able to work out plots with characters either in my muse's canon(s) or muses from other Tales games ("canons" is things such as canon side material, Tales gachas Yuri is in, etc). if I don't know your character well (canon or OC), memes tend to work better. I find it difficult to plot specific things out when I don't know a particular series well or at all. that said, I'll write with people who know my character and are okay with using one of his verses even if I don't know your character/series. I love memes for writing, but I will definitely struggle to actually plot if I don't know the franchise. I also love randomly sent memes just for the sake of writing things!

LONG REPLIES OR SHORT REPLIES: long. short for me is like three paragraphs and I just physically can't find myself doing less. things like one-liners might pop up in dash commentary and such, but for actual threads, I write long replies because that's what comes to me. sometimes motivation really hits me with muses my muse feels close to and you might end up with a ten+ paragraph reply, so uhhh... sorry about that in advance (and my paragraphs can get bulky so doubly sorry in advance!). typically this stuff happens in more emotion-driven threads though.

BEST TIME TO WRITE: NIGHT! NIGHT! NIGHT! I'm a night owl in general, but my writing energy tends to go yeehaw on me at night.

ARE YOU LIKE YOUR MUSES: uhhhh uh uh for legal reasons i probably should not answer that. :)

#{ mun stuff }

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