#anyways. tried for minimalism. idk if i like it | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

bruh-changbin · 1 year

Text

sweet tooth

pairing: park jay x waitress!afab reader

genre: smut, minimal fluff (minors dni)

warnings: oral (f receiving), unprotected sex (be safe), public sex, creampie, finger sucking, minimal food play, lots of mentions of food, brief mention of male masturbation, jongseong is kind of a big desperate loser, lmk if i’m missing anything

word count: 6.7k

a/n: writing this killed me idk why it took fucking forever dawg. but hey, i’m finally giving you all an enha fic without a depressing ending!!! here’s a fun drinking game to play while you read this: take a shot every time jay says a variation of ‘uhhh’ (you will die) ALSOOOO this is for my bae’s @k-ingzo @lix-ables thank you guys for hyping me up to write this bc if you didn’t I’m 90% sure I would’ve scrapped it 😻 LOVE YAAAAA

waiting.

the most painful game one can be subjected to.

seconds stretch into minutes stretch into hours and soon enough the whole concept of time is but a mere social construct that holds no real value.

surely his coffee’s gone cold by now.

the view from the window to his right has progressed from one filled with gold, yellow and orange to one filled with blue, black, and indigo. one by one the neon signs of nearby businesses have flickered on to attract the nighttime crowd.

he tries to ignore the way his heart is sinking in his chest, much like the way he himself is sinking deeper and deeper into the red vinyl cushion of the booth he’s seated in. the overhead speakers have been blaring elvis for the past half hour and he wants to scream and smash a plate on the floor in frustration. if they play hound dog one more time i swear i’m gonna-

jennifer. 20. single. 2.3 km away. her bio read: only swipe right if you like puppies!!!!!

he does like puppies and found her to be quite pretty, so he did as he was instructed. his heart did a small flip in his chest when his phone screen lit up reading ‘it’s a match!’. he got to talking to her and things were going smoothly. well, at least he thought they were. now he’s alone in a booth constantly refreshing their online chat with some sliver of hope that she may still be coming. the same three messages stare back at him:

[5:17 pm] jay : hey! I got here a bit early so i’m just waiting in the car. let me know when you get here and we’ll go in together.

[6:03 pm] jay: it started getting busy so i snagged us a booth, i hope that’s ok… anyways, i’ll see you soon.

[6:49 pm] jay: hello?

whatever, her loss. fuck dating apps.

and fuck jake sim for making him sign up for one.

maybe tinder just isn’t for him. maybe he needs to find love the old fashion way: bumping into someone on the street; locking eyes across a crowded room; both of you reaching for the last bottle of wine at the grocery store and then just insisting that the other takes it. you know, the kind of shit you see in movies.

the only thing is he’s tried the old fashion way for years to no avail, with tinder being his last resort. things like these take time, he tries to remind himself. you can’t rush love, that’s the magic of it!

but now, seated in a booth at an obnoxiously retro themed diner with his head hung low, he has lost all faith in love. he picks up the porcelain mug to his right and downs the dark liquid; cold, just like his heart.

he should just leave. i mean it’s obvious at this point that he’s been stood up so he should just head home where the teasing and nagging from jake that will bruise his ego even more is iminent. there comes a time in life where one must accept defeat and move on with-

“would you like a top up, sir?”

a sudden interjection from a saccharine voice to his left is what pulls him out of his trance of self pity. woah, hello you.

it’s been a long time since he’s been rendered speechless, but you do that to him. you, looking like someone who should be on the cover of a magazine as opposed to serving coffee in a diner. a white button down hugs your torso in all the right ways and he’s envious of the red apron that’s tightly wrapped around your waist because that should be him. the blue ballpoint pen tucked behind your ear somehow makes you 10x more attractive and he can feel his throat close up at the sight of you.

your skin looks smooth and your lips look plump and thank fuck jessica bailed on him because now all he can think about is bending you over this very table and fucking you raw. top up? more like top me, please!

the glint of the gold name tag pinned onto your shirt catches his eye and he reads it: y/n. pretty.

he notices your eyes shifting around anxiously and reality comes crashing down on him. stop drooling over her tits and answer the question you perv. focus!

“i u-uhhh yes, uh yes please that’d be great,” he stutters out embarrassingly, prompting you to bend over and refill his mug with steaming hot coffee from a pot that you hold with a perfectly manicured hand.

“can i get you anything else while you…” your eyes dart to the empty seat across from where he’s seated, “wait?”

god this is so embarrassing. now the cute waitress thinks he’s a fucking loser who got stood up (that is exactly what happened). could this day get any worse? he was just about to leave, spare himself from more agony when you waltzed into his life and made his brain a complicated, frazzled mess.

“uhmm no that’s ok,” he’s trying very hard not to trip over the simplest of words, “just the bill would be great.”

you nod, about to turn around and head over to the register when jay speaks up again in an attempt to preserve his image.

“it was supposed to be a-a work meeting,” he starts while motioning to the still empty spot across from him, “but my uh….. business partner… couldn’t make it, so..”

he’s lying. you know he’s lying. someone waiting for their ‘business partner’ to show up wouldn’t be checking their phone every 1-3 minutes while intermittently wiping their clammy palms on their slacks every time the doorbell jingles and a new customer enters.

but he doesn’t need to know that, so you paint on an understanding smile before heading over to the diner counter, sparing him one final glance over your shoulder.

it’s a sad sight to see; a handsome boy patiently waiting for someone who’s clearly not going to show up. so you bring him a slice of red velvet cake dolled up with cream cheese icing and waive the two cups of coffee that were tacked onto his bill for the evening.

“it’s on the house,” you practically whisper into his ear while placing a comforting hand on his sturdy shoulder.

“oh!” his voice cracks, “t-thank you so much i-” he calls, but you’re already walking away to assist another table.

his hand instinctively reaches to where yours was placed on his shoulder only moments ago. he could sense the warmth radiating from your palm, feel the stray hairs of your bangs tickle his ear, smell the artificial strawberry scent of your lip gloss.

either someone decided to crank the heat up in the diner or he’s becoming extremely flustered (it’s the second one). he scoffs down the cake you left him with flushed cheeks and tight pants, visions of himself prying your legs open and indulging in something sweeter plaguing his mind.

with a hefty sigh he throws on his coat before making his way out of the diner and into his car that’s parked right out front. from behind his windshield he watches as you greet a group of other customers before turning his keys in the ignition and peeling out of the parking lot.

he doesn’t even make it home before he’s pulling into an empty parking lot and jerking himself to the thought of you and your work uniform and your glossed lips.

covet. desire. yearn for. crave.

all very real tertiary emotions that park jay would use to describe his current feelings towards you - a server who he spoke to for two minutes max and now can’t seem to move on from.

unsurprisingly, jake teased the fuck out of him for getting stood up in the way that friends do. but he doesn’t know that jay views his failed date as a complete success.

albeit he is still mildly salty over the fact that he got stood up, all negativity is washed from his brain the moment he pulls into the familiar parking lot in front of the familiar diner and he feels the familiar pitter patter of his heart quickening its pace from behind his ribcage.

he tried to hold off on returning the literal day after he was just there, he really did, but he simply couldn’t bear it. the urge to see you, to observe you interacting with other patrons to know if you’re nice to everyone or if he got special treatment is too strong to ignore. it’s for science! he assures himself.

the dulcet jingle of the bell as he opens the door to the diner rings in his ears, and he waits to be seated. the hostess that shows him to a booth similar to the one he was in yesterday is pretty, but she’s not you. only then does jay realize that the possibility of you not having been scheduled to work today is very real. this is only worsened by the fact that he decided to come in the late morning today as opposed to the evening like yesterday. stupid, stupid, stupid!!!

while feeling like a complete and utter idiot he decides to get to work, whipping out his journal, writing utensils and laptop for the sake of not looking like a weirdo. what kind of person goes to a diner and just…. sits there. he’s gotta keep up a facade.

things are starting to look grim for jay as he sits and works and waits for the object of his desire to appear in front of him. while the retro cat clock on the wall continues its relentless ticking he attempts to swallow down his dismay.

alas, the universe must be on his side after all for soon enough he catches a glimpse of you through his peripherals. yes! you seem to be a little frazzled, gnawing on the inside of your cheek before grabbing a mop to clean up the chocolate milk that a toddler has decided to decorate the floor with; your shift must have just started.

he keeps his head hung low while intermittently scribbling in his journal or scrolling on his laptop, opting to steal an occasional glance as you assist a plethora of other patrons. the coffee he was served upon his arrival is starting to go tepid, much like yesterday, and he’s practically praying you’ll soon stride over and ask if he needs a top up.

“more coffee…” you pause briefly, “jay?”

hold up, how’d you learn his name?

his brow quirks upwards in confusion and with your hand - the one that’s not holding a boiling pot of coffee - you point to his leather bound journal that’s splayed across the table, opened to the first page. property of park jay is scrawled across the top in his sloppy handwriting akin to that of a first graders. he’s surprised you can even distinguish what it says to be completely honest.

“ahhh,” he remarks in understanding, smiling ever so slightly because hey, now you know each others names. that’s a step in the right direction.

“were you looking to order something? you know, other than black coffee.”

as if on cue his stomach growls (luckily quietly enough for you to not pick up on it) and he fumbles for the plastic covered menu to his right that slips and slides in his sweaty grasp.

“i would love to but uhh, i’m not sure what i’m in the mood for… what do you recommend?”

you roll his question around in your head for a moment, “were you thinking sweet or savoury? or if you want both, we make a pretty mean monte cristo.”

at this point if you told jay to walk off a cliff he would do it, so he orders your recommendation without hesitation.

“good call,” you purr before waltzing away from his booth and into the kitchen, leaving jay to erupt in a fit of goosebumps on his own.

while he waits he busies himself with reading an article on his laptop, getting halfway through before realizing he hasn’t actually been taking any information in the entire time. but can you blame him? his brain is… preoccupied with other thoughts.

soon enough you’re striding back over to where he’s seated, placing a steaming monte cristo with so much confectioner's sugar on top it looks as if there’s been a mini avalanche in front of him. he thanks you and is about to dig in before he realizes you aren’t leaving.

“is your business partner coming today?”

…what?

“my business partner? i don’t- OH! fuck, uh y-yes my business partner right! uh no, no he’s not coming today. i usually come here to work on my own though.”

for a moment he forgot about the blatant lie he spilled to you the last time he was here to save face, but he thinks he saved himself with that last bit.

a playful yet triumphant smirk makes its way onto your face, “that’s funny, i’ve never seen you here before yesterday.”

his eyes widen and his palms become impossibly sweaty. caught in a lie, great.

before he can come up with a witty response you just shoot him a knowing look as you walk away from the booth he’s seated in, your strawberry body spray wafting behind you and infiltrating his senses, rendering him immobile.

ugh how you make his teeth ache! he longs to douse you in syrup and powdered sugar, drag his hot tongue across your skin as you squirm and twist in pleasure underneath him. he’s sure you’d be sweet enough to give him a cavity. he finishes his monte cristo with gusto and attempts to do more work on his laptop but finds his brain to be far too frazzled to do so.

when he decides to call it quits, he leaves you a hefty tip before driving home with the taste of sugar coating his lips and the inside of his mouth.

over the span of a few weeks the two of you become accustomed to a game similar to the likes of cat and mouse.

he shows up to the diner in the late morning/early afternoon and prays that you’re scheduled for a shift; you usually are. through the course of a few hours jay manages to get minimal amounts of work done while you check on him occasionally, offering your opinions on different menu items and then placing a hand on his shoulder with a laugh when he trips over his words.

he’s sure you can sense the tension as well, but in case you can’t he keeps his thoughts to himself. you could just be doing your job for all he knows.

nevertheless, it feels as if all aspects of jay’s life now revolve around you. when he falls asleep at night you’re the last thing on his mind and when he wakes up you’re the first. when he gets himself off he has to think of you or else he won’t feel satisfied, and he can only hope and pray that one day he’ll be able to feel your body against his, the warmth radiating from your body making him feel like a cake in an oven.

sure he’d love to take you out, shower you with gifts and spoil you by taking you to expensive places that would surely break the bank, but he just can’t seem to push away all of the hardly appropriate thoughts and feelings he harbours towards you. it’s becoming quite an issue, honestly.

he thinks of popping the buttons on your blouse open one by one before diving in, scattering bite marks and bruises across your tits and neck and collarbones as you writhe and plead underneath him. i need more jay, please give it to me…

god you would sound so perfect.

his fantasies don’t stop there though; they never do. he can’t help himself from imagining what it'd be like to reach up your skirt and peel your panties down your legs as if they’re strands of red licorice. he’d go so slow, taunting and teasing you before slipping himself inside of you and feeling your cunt suck him in as if you crave him like oxygen.

you smell of strawberries and he’s sure you taste like them too. the stripper red polish on your nails would pair so well with the scratches he’s sure you’d leave across the expanse of his back and shoulders. he longs to dig his teeth into your plush thighs like they’re mochi, snapping a picture of his bite mark embedded in your perfect skin to save for later use.

down bad is an understatement when it comes to jay’s desire for you. infatuation is more like it.

today starts off like every other day. the smell of burnt coffee is what pulls him from his slumbers, and the clock on his bedside table tells him he managed to sleep in until one in the afternoon. when he trudges into the kitchen he sees his roommate and friend jake, who likely also just woke up and still doesn’t understand how to properly operate a coffee machine, staring at his phone.

it’s then that jake reminds him of the plans they made to spend the afternoon at their friends house playing video games before grabbing takeout for dinner. jay curses his past self for agreeing to these dumb plans with his dumb friends since he was planning on heading to the diner today to marvel at his favourite waitress! oh well, he can still head over for an hour and a half at most before he has to return and uphold the prior promise he made.

he turns down jake’s offer of a cup of coffee and, after a quick shower, he’s flying out the door.

when he finally makes it to the place where he spends most of his days now he doesn’t even wait to be seated, just slips into the same booth as always and waits for you. the little ritual the two of you have fallen into now so ingrained into his brain he can’t imagine straying from it. alas, it’s decently busy today so he busies himself by scrolling through his instagram feed while waiting for you to grace him with your presence.

when you finally appear in front of him you don’t say anything, just shoot him your usual friendly smile while precariously placing a napkin and mug of black coffee in front of him before leaving as quickly as you came. this sends jay into an emotional spiral. oh god, did i do something wrong? he ponders to himself, brows furrowed as he tries to remember everything he said to you during your last interaction that could have potentially been misconstrued.

only then does he notice the blue ink poking out from the napkin tucked underneath his steaming mug of coffee. with shaky hands he pulls it out and reads the short message written in your refined penmanship:

my shift is done at 10:00 pm.

wait for me? :)

y/n

and just below your neat scrawl he can make out a sticky lip gloss print, a faint hint of the fake strawberry scent that plagues his mind day and night still lingering.

in this moment he should be happy, ecstatic, victorious even! his constant and obsequious devotion to you has not gone unnoticed, and at long last he’ll be alone with you in a place that doesn’t have checkered tile floors and posters of pin ups on every square inch of the teal coloured walls. but no, all he feels is embarrassment.

embarrassment because he was too much of a wiener to actually do something so you felt the need to take matters into your own hands. and embarrassment because your little napkin love letter signed off with your glossy kiss is making him excruciatingly horny. it’s like he’s in highschool all over again - yikes.

he glances at the face of the silver watch that he scarcely takes off, the leather wrist strap now feeling uncomfortably tight considering his recent spike in blood pressure. with some reluctance he decides to leave early, tucking your napkin note into his pocket before driving home while barely focusing on the road and cars in front of him.

the hangout with jake and the rest of his friends is excruciating as expected. time seems to both fly by and drag on simultaneously, and he watches the hands on his watch tick down the hours, minutes, seconds until he can finally be with you - alone. when jake finally throws the towel in jay all but runs out of the door, speeding down the now far emptier city streets before pulling into the dining parking lot and waiting (he’s 23 minutes early).

with every passing minute his heart rate quickens and, when the time reads 10:06 pm, he thinks he’s going to faint when he sees you exit your place of work and scan the parking lot briefly before making your way over to his car. the sound of his passenger side door opening feels far off as he tries to make sense of the fact that you are about to be in his car, right beside him. what the fuck.

“hi.”

“i like your car.”

“oh, you do?”

“yep. it suits you.”

“really?”

you only nod at this, flashing him a subtle grin before flipping down the sun visor in front of you to tidy up your appearance after a long and tiring shift (he still thinks you look pretty). it feels as if his fingers aren’t his own as he fiddles with the radio while gazing at you through his peripherals, watching as you rub the smudged mascara from underneath your eyes before applying a final coat of the lip gloss that he loves oh so much. how on earth is he going to last longer than 5 minutes without falling at your feet?

“sooo what do you wanna do?” jay questions, unsure if his eagerness to hear your response is because he’s genuinely curious or because he just likes the sound of your voice.

“you choose, take me anywhere,” you offer with a smile, “surprise me!”

“okay!” he responds, narrowly escaping a voice crack as he shifts his car into reverse.. he has just the place in mind.

the drive is somewhat of a lengthy one, although you don’t seem to mind. it’s warm enough to have the windows down, and jay greedily gulps down deep breaths of the fresh night air. from your spot in the passenger seat you ramble about your day at the diner, complaining about an old man who held the ketchup bottle the wrong way and promptly squirted it all over you when you came to ask how he was doing. despite all, you still manage to have a positive attitude.

soon enough he’s pulling off of the main road into an opening surrounded by woods, killing the engine and the car lights and opting to bask in the natural glow of the night sky.

“wow jay, way to be subtle.”

“what!!?”

“what do you mean what? you bring me to the city’s unofficial official makeout spot and expect me to not be skeptical?”

fuck. for the entirety of the drive over he was hoping that you wouldn’t know about the promiscuous reputation this spot has garnered over the years. he can’t give up this quickly though, he must play innocent!

“i- woahh, is that what this place is? i genuinely had no idea i just-”

“shut it jay, the first thing i noticed about you was that you’re a terrible liar.”

you’ve got him there, deception is not his strong suit. he’s about to explain himself when he notices you unbuckling your seatbelt and stepping out of his car, prompting him to do the same.

“i just thought it would be a nice, secluded space where we could talk and hang out… nothing more.”

silence settles over the two of you and, upon noting jay’s queasy expression, you decide to indulge yourself and tease him (just a little bit).

“what are you trying to say?” you bat your eyelashes and fake being in thought, “that you don’t wanna fuck me on the hood of your car?”

he chokes on his saliva.

“w-what i’m trying to say is that i’m a uhhhh gentleman. i’m a gentleman.”

yeah right, you think to yourself. a gentleman and a major fucking hypocrite.

“okay jay, if you’re such a gentleman then why do you have a raging hard-on from literally just talking to me?”

in the pale moonlight you see his eyes widen before he scrambles to cover his crotch, not doing much to conceal his erection that’s straining against his slacks.

“oh god i’m so sorry i can explain uhh-”

“i’m just fucking with you,” you taunt before petting his hair affectionately, attempting to quieten your giggles while jay plasters on a fake smile even though he looks like he’s about to puke. in an attempt to garner the little composure he has left he turns away from you, the cool night air soothing his heated cheeks.

from where he’s standing he’s granted an overarching view of the city he calls home. against the nighttime sky he can decipher the suburbs, the downtown area, the cafe district. upon each building there’s a small rectangle filled with yellow or white light, windows in which individual people are carrying out their individual lives; it makes everything seem so… miniscule. i mean, aside from you, nobody even knows he’s up here - and he’s still trying to decipher if that’s a good thing or not, seeing as tonight all he’s done is embarrass himself.

when he looks back you’re leaning against the hood of his car, your arms folded across your chest which sequentially shoves your tits together in a way that makes him wanna plunge his face in between them and give you a good old fashioned motorboat.

his thoughts are cut off when you speak up.

“i brought you something,” you announce before turning and opening the passenger side door of jay’s car, trifling around in your before before pulling something out and heading back to where you were standing before, leaning against the hood of his car. in your hands is a toppled over piece of red velvet cake protected by a clear plastic takeout container coupled with two disposable forks.

“sorry it’s kinda smushed…. i forgot about it.”

“no, that’s ok!” jay thinks you shouldn’t have to apologize for anything ever, “thank you.”

with a crisp pop you open up the container, moving it to sit in between the two of you before passing jay one of the flimsy plastic forks. he lets you take the first bite, stating that after a long shift you need to get your blood sugar back up. you laugh before complying, watching as jay takes a bite right after you do, his eyes rolling back as all of the sweet, rich flavours dance across his taste buds. despite the piece of cake not being in the best condition, it still tastes like heaven.

jay’s caught off guard when your hand suddenly swoops in just as he’s about to spear another piece of cake with his fork, collecting a dollop of icing on one of your nails. he should’ve seen it coming when you reach up and wipe it on the tip of his nose with a playful laugh.

“wow y/n, so original,” he sneers while wiping the cream cheese icing on his nose onto the back of his hand.

he attempts to do the same to you, dipping his finger in the thick frosting before moving to wipe it on the tip of your nose, but you suddenly latch onto his wrist. he watches with hungry eyes and an erratic pulse as your tongue comes in contact with his knuckle, licking all the way up to his icing-coated fingertip before taking his digit inside your mouth. the thick muscle of your tongue wraps around his finger, sucking away the sweetness before you pull yourself off of him. a faint pink ring of lip gloss on the base of his knuckle now present.

fuck me.

not a single word is exchanged before jay pushes himself onto you, prompting you to lean back against the hood of his car that’s still slightly warm. with your body weight resting on your elbows and your legs spreading to accommodate jay’s torso, you finally let him taste you.

your lips are soft and warm like a pastry fresh out of the oven, and when he pulls away he heaves a heavenly sigh filled with pleasure and contentment and thank fuck this is finally happening. it’s not long before you’re pressing your lips to jay’s again, one of your hands moving up to caress the shell of his ear before resting against his face.

you can feel his jaw move against your palm when he opens his mouth and drags his tongue across your sugar coated lips, inducing you to do the same. when his tongue pushes past your teeth and brushes against yours you groan in pleasure, the fingers previously gracing his face dipping down to undo several buttons of your work shirt. with his lips against yours and his tongue down your throat you can feel him giving into you, as if you’re a delectable piece of his favourite candy and he has a raging sweet tooth.

when jay pulls himself off of you you think you might just cry. luckily you don’t go without his touch for long, for when you open your eyes you watch him dip two fingers into the frosting on top of the forgotten slice of cake before smearing it across the exposed flesh of your tits and down your sternum. he promptly shoves the two frosting coating fingers into your gaping mouth, gazing at you with heart eyes as you suck them clean.

only then does he dip his head down, the tip of his tongue teasing the sensitive skin of your right breast before licking the stripe of icing off with one broad swipe of his tongue. he gives your other breast the same treatment before giving it teasing nips and kisses, using his tongue to soothe the pinch of his canines.

once he licks the rest of the frosting from your sternum he continues his descent, not stopping until the insides of your thighs are brushing against his pierced ears. in one swift movement he flips your skirt upwards, your pretty panties with a subtle wet patch now on display for him and only him.

not being able to resist seeing your bare cunt in all of its glory, jay eagerly digs two fingers into the waistband before dragging the fabric down your legs. your lacy pink thong gets all twisted and tangled around your ankles as jay struggles to pull it off, eventually managing to get it around your sneakers before tucking it into his pocket for safe keeping.

he feels his pants grow impossibly tights as he stares at you on the hood of your car with your legs spread, quite literally something that could’ve been torn right out of a playboy. without missing a beat jay dives into you, flattening his thick tongue and licking you like he would a dripping ice cream cone. it catches you by surprise and you instinctively tangle your fingers in his ebony tresses, a needy moan making its way past your lips and into the air. jay uses the tip of his tongue to explore your needy pussy, lapping up your juices and revelling in the taste on his tongue. i could die like this he thinks, and he digs his blunt nails into your thighs while shoving his head impossibly deeper.

it’s somewhat sloppy, but what he lacks in technique he makes up for in enthusiasm. it feels like he’s practically making out with your cunt and you can’t help yourself from tugging on his hair in approval. the groans he emits in response have you shuddering, the vibrations causing your legs to shake and tremble as you struggle to keep them pried open. in your lower abdomen you can feel the pressure of an impending orgasm begin to brew.

this sensation only doubles when jay shifts his focus to your clit, sucking on and toying with it like it’s a sugar-covered gumdrop. his actions have you arching your back off of the hood of his car, eyes squeezing shut as you cry and plead, “p-please don’t stop jay… never stop.”

your pleas boost jay’s ego to the max and he eats you out with unrestrained passion, alternating between sucking your clit and tonguing your hole until you finish all over his mouth with a canorous cry that reverberates between his ears. he hopes to never forget that sound.

with reluctance he pulls himself off of your sweet pussy, having to push your legs apart slightly to free himself from the way they were clenching around his head. he stares at you in awe as you bask in the post-orgasm sensation, mouth agape and chest heaving faintly. your eyes, when you finally pry them open, are slightly glassy and it looks like it takes you a second to come back to earth.

your grip on jay’s hair loosened but you never fully let go, and soon enough he feels you tugging at his roots in an attempt to get him to hover over you once again. without hesitation you press your lips to his once again, tasting yourself in and on his mouth as you kiss him until you can’t breathe.

his curious hands never stay resting in one spot on your body for longer than a second before he’s exploring somewhere else, his mouth making a path from your lips down to your jaw and neck. the tips of his fingers finally stop when they reach your hips, gripping onto your and flipping you over so your chest is against jay’s car and your ass is up in the air.

he can’t help himself from ogling at your perfect form all splayed out for him. the curve of your ass is to die for and jay starts subconsciously unbuckling his belt, easing the strain of his pants against his painfully hard dick.

from your spot on top of the car you begin to grow impatient. your tits are smushed and your neck is craned and even though you just came you’re already ready for another one if it means you get to feel jay filling you up like a cream puff. luckily, you soon feel the tip of jay’s cock dragging through your folds, your still-sensitive clit throbbing slightly when he bumps into it. the sound of jay spitting into his palm joins that of the crickets and your erratic breathing, soon replaced by his sighs of delight as he strokes his cock with his spit covered hand to help lube it up.

you let out a breath you didn’t know you were holding in when you finally feel him prod your entrance with his tip, although you can sense some hesitancy. it’s not surprising when the silence is broken by jay asking: “...are you ready?”

he feels his chest tighten when you make a noise of approval followed by a meek nod, your starry eyes glancing back at him as much as you can in this particular position. with a hefty exhale he nods back before slowly starting to sink into you, a low groan making its way out of his chest as he pushes deeper and deeper until his hips are flush with your ass.

once fully inside of you he remains stagnant for a moment, needing to adjust to how incredibly warm and tight you feel if he wants to last longer than three seconds. soon enough he feels he’s garnered enough collectedness to start moving, so he does.

his movements are small, almost timid at first. like he’s testing the waters, garnering enough confidence to go harder, faster. your hushed whimpers of pleasure ring in his ears and he teasingly rolls his hips in an attempt to have you feel him impossibly deeper inside of you.

“j-jay!” you cry when he seemingly bumps your g-spot with the tip of his cock, the muscles of your waist tensing up when he does. wanting to provide you as much pleasure as possible he continues his ministrations, not altering them in any way out of fear of doing something wrong.

jay feels his stomach start to seize up as a pleasurable burn takes hold in his lower stomach, his vision blurring slightly at the edges as he shifts between groaning aloud and biting his lip so hard he’s worried he’ll break the skin and draw blood. with exercised caution he picks up the pace, ensuring that in this moment you’re still feeling as good as he is.

his cock slips in and out of your desperate, dripping hole with ease, your hips banging against the unyielding metal hood of his car with each and every thrust. it’s hardly comfortable, but at this moment in time you think you’d rather die than have jay stop - so you persevere.

“god you’re so good jay, so fucking big,” you praise as you feel your second orgasm of the night approaching steadily. most of your limbs have started to go numb from the position you’re in yet you can feel each and every nerve end slowly begin to burn up, to bring you closer and closer to release. when jay reaches down to toy with your aching clit, you’re done for.

the slight ache from the way your cunt is stretched around his cock adds to the jolting sensations that come every time he bumps your clit has you so close, so close you can taste the sweet promise of an orgasm dancing on the tip of your tongue. jay feels it too, for he throws all inhibitions to the wind and fucks you from behind with no restraint.

he can feel his release creep up his spine and spread through all of his limbs until it’s all he can see, taste, and feel. groans continue to spill past his lips as white hot light floods his senses and a blinding orgasm washes over him, which is only strengthened by the sensation of your pussy clenching around his cock as you finish underneath him. he cums inside of your wanting cunt, filling it up to the brim before collapsing on top of you with a grunt.

seconds turn into minutes and the two of you remain in place, breaths and pulses struggling to return to normal as you come down from an intense high. jay can feel his shirt clinging to his sweaty back, and he scrambles off of you when he realizes he was quite literally resting all of his weight on you.

with a helping hand he helps you sit up, chuckling slightly when your knees turn to jello when you try to stand up. so, you opt to stay seated on the hood of jay’s car for just a few more moments, patting the spot beside you to get him to sit down. you’re sure you look like a mess, but jay gazes at you with something that can only be described as awe.

smitten. captivated. enraptured. allured.

the pale light of the moon casts a heavenly glow across your face, and he kisses your lips like they’re covered in strawberry syrup.

a/n: tumblr’s editing system is the biggest piece of garbage i am so sorry if there are any weird glitches or anything but i am literally seconds away from whipping my laptop at the wall out of frustration as i edit this so pls lmk if anything looks weird when this posts lawl thank you

#enhypen smut #park jay smut #park jongseong smut #enhypen imagines #enhypen fanfiction #enhypen blurbs #enhypen x reader #park jongseong x reader #park jay x reader #jay park x reader #park jongseong fanfiction #park jay fanfiction #park jongseong blurbs #park jay blurbs

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daddyslilchickenfingers2 · 5 months

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Kinktober (reuploaded)

Forced Orgasms (Matt)

Request: handcuffing & blindfolding matt on his birthday. his gift is reader herself. she goes down on him & whispers filthy things in his ear. putting her boobs in his face. riding him. but he can't see or touch the entire time. so he gets so overwhelmed out of pleasure & all that?

Warnings: smut, use of handcuffs/vibrator/blindfold, minimal squirting, daddy kink, idk what else to put lol

Matt’s pov

Today was our 20th birthday, it was Sunday morning and I woke up to the smell of vanilla and coconut. It was Y/n, our hometown best friend who now lives near us in LA, I’d know her smell anywhere. See, I may or may not have a huge crush on her, so I was pleasantly surprised to be woken up by her. “Good morning Matthew, happy birthday!” she said excitedly as I rolled over in bed, “Don’t call me Matthew” I groaned into my pillow. “C’mon get up! Me, Madi, and Laura have a surprise for you guys, go brush your teeth” she tried pulling me up but failed, “Okay fine” I agreed, getting up and going to brush my teeth.

She covered my eyes as we walked downstairs to the living room, I heard Nick complaining to Madi when we got there and assumed we were just waiting on Chris. I was right as a couple of minutes later we heard Chris come upstairs and all of our eyes were uncovered “Surprise!” we heard a bunch of people say. It was our parents, Justin, and Nate, that was a really good surprise. We walked over and hugged everyone, thanking Laura, Y/n, and Madi afterwards because they knew we missed everyone. We had a pretty chill day, going out for a late lunch around 4pm because our parents and Justin were jet lagged as fuck. Nate was staying with us and he wasn’t really that tired anyways.

We got home around 6:30pm, Madi, Y/n, and obviously, Nate came back with us. I felt like everyone knew something that I didn’t because Chris and Nate kept smirking at me while Y/n, Nick, and Madi kept whispering shit to each other. I was confused but I just ignored it, chilling for an hour and a half before I went upstairs to change, for some reason, Y/n followed me. “What are you doing?” I questioned her, she grabbed one of my hands, making me nervous as she played with the couple of rings I had on. She looked at me with an adorable shy smile, “I have another gift but it’s only for you, pack some clothes and stuff, it’s a surprise” she said shyly, letting my hand go as she sat on my bed. I was still confused but I packed a bag anyways, we headed downstairs and Y/n said bye to everyone.

I was literally so confused, where are we going, what are we doing? I thought to myself as I too said bye to everyone. “Bye Bernard, have fun, and don’t get mad at me for exposing you!” Chris shouted as we left. “What is he talking about?” I asked Y/n, “Don’t worry about it, but you can’t get mad at me if you don’t like it. It was Chris’ idea, I just agreed that I liked it” she once again said nervously as we got into her car. We arrived at her apartment but before going inside she put a blindfold on me, dragging me inside “Wait here for two seconds I’ll be right back” she said, running up the stairs.

Coming back down after a few minutes, she grabbed my hand again and helped me up the stairs, we made it to her bedroom. I could smell her favorite vanilla candle burning which was calming but I got nervous again when she started speaking, holding one of my hands again. “Promise me that you won’t beat Chris’ ass for telling me this and don’t yell at Nate and Nick for telling me something else” she pleaded, now I was concerned because what the fuck did they tell her?

“I promise to try not to beat his ass” I nervously laughed, still not able to see anything, “And you have to promise not to get mad at me because I’ve almost backed out so many times because I don’t want to lose you as a friend” she said kinda fast. That’s something she does when she’s really anxious so I pulled her in for a hug, she had definitely changed shirts since I could now feel her shoulders but I just ignored it “I could never get mad at you” I honestly told her. “You have to promise me Matt” she mumbled, “I promise Y/n/n” I said as she pulled away, standing off to the side of me.

“Okay then take your blindfold off” I did as she said, blinking a few times before realizing what was laid out on her bed. There was a black silky blindfold, two sets of fuzzy black handcuffs, and a vibrator on her bed. Confused I turned to Y/n to ask, “What is all that f-“ but I quickly cut myself off, when I saw what she was wearing, “Woah…” I said as I felt my cock start to get hard. There she was, wearing an all black, lace lingerie set and she looked fucking phenomenal. “Do ya like it Matty?” said asked while biting her lip, my eyes raked over her body, “Love it” was all I could manage to say.

Y/n stood in front of me, “So Nick and Nate have been saying you have a little crush on me…” she teased, “And Chris really did you a solid” she continued. I blushed because it’s true but I was also confused as to what Chris told her. “What did he do?” I asked, Y/n stepped forward and wrapped her arms around my neck, making my breath hitch. “He told me that you wanted me to blindfold you and handcuff you to the bed. And that you wanted me to ride you and tease you all night” she said in a seductive voice. Moving closer to my ear, she whispered, “Is that something you really want Matty?” she asked before stepping back.

I couldn’t believe what she just said, I was only able to let out a breathless, “Please” which made her smile. “Yeah? Then strip down to your boxers and sit on the bed for me pretty boy” she said. Placing her hand over my cock and giving it a quick squeeze before she sat on the corner of the bed. I stood there processing everything until she snapped me out of it, “I’m waiting Matty” she spoke in a condescending tone. With that I quickly got undressed and sat on the bed, Y/n came and sat on my lap “You really wanna do this Matt?” she asked sweetly.

Y/n’s pov

Matt put his hands on my waist and looked at me with his bright blue eyes, “More than anything, please I want this so bad” he said before moving one hand to my cheek and pulling me in for a kiss. I started grinding down on him as the kiss got heated, I grabbed one set of handcuffs and cuffed his right arm to the bed frame. Matt bucked his hips up and whined as I did the same with his left hand and he pulled away. “Holy fuck this is already so much hotter than I could have ever imagined” he panted, already looking so fucked out.

Before I could say anything, Matt spoke in a low voice, “Chris left one thing out, I want you to force me to cum until I physically can’t anymore. Don’t stop unless I say the color red. No matter what, do not stop” “That’s fucking hot” I smirked at him. I placed my lips back onto Matt’s while rubbing my hands up his sides, biting his lip as I pulled away. “Are you ready for the blindfold daddy?” I asked, remembering Matt once said he had a daddy kink. He let out a deep groan “Wanna see you get naked first” considering he’d be blindfolded for most of this, I decided to be nice.

I got off the bed and turned around, teasingly taking my panties off so Matt could see my ass before I went back to straddling his lap. I unhooked my bra and dropped it off the side of the bed while Matt’s eyes stayed glued to my chest. He was also biting his lip so I gently pulled it back from his teeth, “Is this better?” I asked as I grabbed the blindfold. “So much better” he replied, “It’s a shame you won’t be able to see it” I smirked as I slipped the blindfold over his head and got up, remembering I forgot to pull out my lube. “What are you doing?” he questioned but I just ignored him, throwing the lube on the bed and sliding his boxers down.

I knew Matt was going to be big, but I wasn’t expecting him to be this big, “You never told me you had such a big dick before” I teased him, watching his cock ooze with precum. “You never asked” he replied back, trying to be a smart ass but quickly humbled himself as I grabbed onto his cock. “Don’t be smart mouth with me, Matthew” I replied, moving down to tease his cock, licking a bold stripe from his balls all the way up to his tip. His breath hitched as I moved back to sitting on his lap, grinding my wet pussy against his cock. “Don’t tease me Y/n/n” Matt groaned, thrusting his hips up in hopes of sliding into me but failed.

I kissed my way down Matt’s body, fully taking all of his hard cock into my mouth at once causing Matt to let out a surprised moan. I licked all across his shaft, digging my tongue into the slit which caused Matt to buck his hips up and make me gag. I continued sucking him off until, without a warning, Matt came down my throat. I moaned around his cock before pulling off and swallowing, “That was- wow that was amazing” Matt panted out. “Want me to ride your cock daddy?” I asked while kissing his neck and rubbing his thigh, causing him to get hard again. “Please do. I want your wet little pussy around my cock so bad baby” he groaned, desperate to fully live out his fantasy. I moved to straddle his lap, lining up my hole with his dick and slowly sinking down, whimpering at the big stretch.

“You’re so big Matt! Making me feel so full” I whined. Slowly, I started to move on his cock, “Goddamn babe, you’re so fucking tight” Matt groaned, bucking his hips up slightly. I started moving at a pretty decent pace, loving Matt’s moans and grunts from beneath me. I removed my hands from his shoulders and started playing with my tits, making sure to let out loud whines and moans to tease him. “I bet you wish you were the one touching my tits right now huh?” I teased, shoving my boobs in his face. “So badly Y/n/n, fuck- I want you to cum around my cock so bad” he said, I moaned as he started thrusting his hips up, causing me to get closer to the edge.

“S-So close daddy” I cried out, “Be a good girl and rub your clit for me” Matt ordered, I started bouncing faster and rubbing my clit. “Fuck Matt, I’m gonna cum! Need you to cum inside of me” I told him as started to cum around his cock, moaning loudly. Matt let out a grunt before filling me up with his cum, I slowly got off his cock and ran my fingers through my folds to collect all the cum. Once my fingers were coated with a mixture of our cum, I brought them up to Matt’s mouth. “Suck my fingers for me Matty” I asked nicely, rubbing the tips of my fingers across his lips, Matt obliged and sucked all three of my fingers clean. He wasn’t hard again yet, but I still started cleaning the cum off his cock with my tongue, slightly overstimulating him. Slowly Matt got hard again, whimpering as I started to kitten lick the tip, making him involuntarily thrust his hips up.

“Too much Matt?” I questioned in a teasing tone, “No! Feels so good, I can definitely cum more for you!” he whimpered out desperately. I started to give him head again, deep throating him the best I could while massaging his balls. I ran my other hand up and down his stomach, lightly scratching the skin and making him shudder at the feeling. “You’re doing so good Y/n/n, making me feel amazing! I always knew you were a slut for my cock” Matt groaned, both praising and degrading me. I moaned around his cock which caused him to thrust his hips up and let out a guttural groan as he came down my throat with minimal warning. All I got was a whiny, “I’m g-gonna—” before he was shooting his load into my mouth.

I obviously swallowed and then pressed my lips against Matt’s, smiling into the quick kiss. I licked up the side of Matt’s neck, nibbling on his earlobe before asking, “How’s the birthday boy enjoying his surprise gift?” resulting in him whimpering. “He’s enjoying it more than he should be…” he moaned, “That’s good, is it too much yet baby?” I asked, wanting to make sure I wasn’t making him cum too much in such a short amount of time. “No, I want more… Actually, I need more. Please! Remember what I said?” He squirmed as I ran my hand across his inner thighs “You want me to force you to cum until you can’t anymore and say the color red” I replied with a giggle.

“That’s correct and I don’t remember saying red yet, so get back to work” he ordered me, “Matt you’re really not in any position to tell me what to do, you know? If I wanted to I could just leave you like this, hard and needy” I teased him. “You wouldn’t dare” he growled, moving his legs to wrap around my thigh and pulling me closer so he could grind himself up against my thigh. Honestly, I wasn’t expecting him to do that but it was really fucking hot. “Wow, I didn’t know you were so needy for me daddy” I said as I pulled my thigh away from his dick, “Take off the fucking blindfold” he tried to sound authoritative, but he honestly just sounded like he was begging.

Instead of giving him what he wanted, I grabbed the lube and opened it, squirting some directly onto Matt’s hard cock. “Fuck, that’s cold” Matt whined before I started jerking him off, spreading around both the lube and the precum on his cock. I was moving my hand at a fast pace and since Matt was already extremely oversensitive so I wasn’t too shocked when he started cumming a bit, but I didn’t stop this time, I kept going. I was enjoying how much Matt was squirming and whimpering under me and I knew it was starting to become too much for him.

Matt surprisingly came a lot for this being his 5th orgasm in such a short amount of time, shooting out cum onto his stomach and my hand. “Have you ever used a vibrator before Matt?” I asked while he was panting from his orgasm, “Yeah, I have one. They feel good, are you gonna use yours on me?” he asked out of breath. “Can I?” I asked, not wanting to push it, “You can, IF you take the blindfold off and let me eat you in the morning” he explained. “Okay fine, only because I wanna see those pretty blue eyes” I agreed.

I slipped the blindfold off, letting Matt’s eyes adjust to the light, watching as they scanned the room before looking at me and staring to get hard again. “Look at that, all I have to do is look at you to get hard” he chuckled before adding, “Make out with me for a minute, yeah?” I giggled at his cuteness but complied, cupping one side of his face and pressing our lips together. We had a heated makeout for a few minutes before I pulled away, Matt bit my lip as I did so, making me whine. “If you want me to cum a lot, you’re going to have to use the vibrator on my tip mostly” he said quietly, blush spreading across his face.

I kissed his neck, mumbling a quick “Got it” before sucking a few hickies onto his collarbone. “This is definitely going to be the last time I’ll be able to cum so I want you to ride my thigh and use that vibrator on me. I need to mark you up too, it’s not fair” he told me. I grabbed the small vibrator and sat on his thigh, slowly rocking back and forth before I turned it on and enclosed my fist with the vibrator around the tip of his cock. Almost instantaneously, Matt started whining as his thigh flexed under me, causing me to moan in return.

“Feel good Matty?” I asked, already knowing the answer, “Mhmm, please uncuff my right hand, wanna rub your clit and make you cum!” he begged and who was I deny that? As soon as he was uncuffed, his two fingers were inside my mouth, having me get them nice and wet so he could rub my clit, noticing we were both getting close. Matt pulled his fingers out of my mouth and immediately started rubbing my clit while sucking hickies into the skin of my neck and breasts. “Fuck daddy, ‘m so close already!” I whimpered and Matt just hummed in agreement, speeding up his movements.

Not even a minute later, I was squirting all over his thigh due to the stimulation on my clit, which led to his orgasm and it was indeed bigger than the last two. I was out of it and didn’t realize I was still holding the vibrator against him until his hand came up to lightly slap my face. Not hard enough to hurt, more like a tap to get my attention back, “R-Red” he said hoarsely, not being able to reach the vibrator himself. “S-Sorry Matty” I said turning it off and tossing it somewhere on the bed behind me “S’okay” he said softly.

Without getting up, I unlocked the other handcuff, Matt’s left arm came down to wrap around my waist like his right one. Matt started leaving kisses up my neck, sucking a few more hickies across the otherwise clear skin. “Best. Birthday. Ever.” he said between kisses, that were slowly moving up towards my lips until we finally shared a lazy but passionate kiss. “Can we go to sleep Matty, ‘m tired” I yawned, even though he should be the tired one.

Matt nodded, helping me lay down before grabbing his shirt off the floor to wipe the cum off both of us. He threw his shirt back onto the floor, moving the vibrator to my nightstand, and handing me my phone to turn the lights off. When I unlocked my phone I laughed, “Chris wants to know if you enjoyed your surprise” “Send him a picture of me kissing your neck right now, it’ll teach him not to be so nosey” Matt mumbled back before kissing my neck.

I snapped a quick picture, not really capturing my face, and sent it with the caption of: ‘Matt said stop being nosey’ and waited for his reply. I turned the lights off as Matt pulled my back against his chest, resting his head on my shoulder as we cuddled up together, only opening our eyes again when we got a response. From Chris: ‘I just threw up’ Matt just kissed my neck again as I turned my phone off, “Well then he shouldn’t have fucking asked” he said tiredly.

I hummed in agreement, grabbing his hand that was around my waist and holding it. “Goodnight Matty, I know it’s technically Monday now but happy birthday handsome” I told him. “Goodnight my beautiful girl, I hope you know you’re mine after tonight and that I love you” he whispered into my ear, “Don’t forget Imma wake you up tomorrow by eating you out” he added. I giggled before replying with an “I know and I love you too” before we both drifted off to sleep. I guess you could say I made a pretty good birthday present.

#matt sturniolo #matthew sturniolo #matt sturniolo smut #matthew sturniolo smut #matt sturniolo x reader #sturniolo triplets smut #sturniolo triplets #sturniolo #matt sturniolo imagine #matt sturniolo x you #matthew sturniolo x reader #matthew sturniolo x you #sturniolo fanfic #sturniolo triplet smut #sturniolo x reader #smut

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444takeomi · 5 months

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PIERCING HCS

: ̗̀➛ summary: waka with dick piercings

character(s): wakasa imaushi

warnings: female reader, nsfw, dick piercings (obvs), oral, mutual masturbation, overstimulation, sending nudes, brief mentions of alcohol

wc: 0.5k

a/n: idk what compelled me to write this but anyway, i hope you enjoy and happy birthday waka

- okay so first of all i think that waka’s first piercing (aside from his signature earring, of course) was purely the result of him losing a bet whilst he was drunk, and while that alone doesn't sound so bad, it turns out it was his dick that he had to get pierced

- even if at first he didn't see the appeal, he still decided to go through with it because he's petty like that ahaha

- after doing a little research he decided on a frenum piercing — minimal pain, it looks cool, it increases both his and his partner's pleasure, what's not to love?

- his overall experience wasn't as bad as he thought it was going to be, of course it was still painful, but the aching subsided fairly quickly and the healing process was rather straightforward

- as often happens when it comes to getting pierced, waka found himself going back for another, and another again, and eventually he ended up with a full jacob's ladder

- he didn't stop there either, he also got a few others like an industrial, helix, and he definitely got his tongue pierced as well

- he absolutely hated healing his tongue purely because he couldn't drink any alcohol while it healed💀

- the first time you saw his dick you were in complete shock, your eyes glued to the metal bars adorning his shaft — waka certainly enjoyed your reaction, unable to stop himself from smirking in amusement at the look on your face

- if the sight alone wasn't enough to leave you at a loss for words, the way he fucked you had left you unable to even think straight let alone speak

- the feeling of the numerous metal balls dragging along your walls made your head spin, your eyes rolling into the back of your head as he pounded your g-spot with every thrust, sending you towards an orgasm that had your toes curling as you gasped and creamed around his cock

- waka’s piercings definitely make him a lot more sensitive since he has so many of them, and it didn't take you long to figure that out — all it took was for you to run your tongue over his frenum piercing and he was putty in your hands

- he loves overstimulating himself, and if you're lucky you'll catch him whining desperately in your ear as he fucks you, he tries to hold back but it just feels so good </3

- waka is already so good at eating pussy but his tongue piercing just enhances everything, also he definitely owns one of those vibrating tongue bars and always asks if he can use it on you

- he loves to randomly send you nudes, to be honest it's mainly so that he has an excuse to show off his piercings💀

- but he genuinely takes the best dick pics, they always have great lighting and perfect angles, and not to mention his dick is ridiculously pretty too <3

- also enjoys mutual masturbation — likes to put on a show for you, stroking his dick tantalisingly slow all while gasping and throwing his head back as he fucks his own fist, and he will definitely tease you if he catches you staring

- probably asks to get matching piercings with you, and if you have any others already he loves playing with them when the two of you cuddle (providing they're fully healed ofc)

- overall waka’s piercings are a lot of fun for both him and you, and they certainly keep things interesting ahaha

please do not translate, repost, or share my writing on any other platforms eg. tiktok

#tokyo revengers #tokyo revengers x reader #wakasa imaushi #wakasa x reader #wakasa x you #✩444.writings #✩444.headcanons

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sundrop-writes · 4 months

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Your First Kiss With Dick Grayson

Dick Grayson x Gender Neutral Reader

Summary:

The Titans have faced a lot together, but never something quite as troubling as the possible return of an inter-dimensional demon that shreds apart worlds and leaves nothing standing in its wake.

You hate to admit it, but even standing with your team - you're afraid. Dick tries his best to comfort you, but for once during his career as noble, selfless team leader - he takes a moment to be selfish, and does something that he has been avoiding doing for years.

Dick Grayson x Gender Neutral Reader. Childhood Friends to Lovers. Angst and Fluff. Set during Season 4, Episode 6.

Word Count: 2,900

DC Titans Masterlist | AO3 Link

Detailed warnings and author's notes below the cut.

Warnings: this one is a bit more on the angsty side; this fic features major spoilers for season 4 (and for the majority of the show) - so if you're watching it for the first time or you haven't seen it yet and you want to watch it spoiler free, then avoid this fic for now; the reader character is completely gender neutral - the only pronouns used for the reader are you/yours; the reader is one of the original Titans; the reader and Dick are childhood friends through the Justice League - the reader is the adoptive child of Oliver Queen/Green Arrow (the reader is a talented marksman and trained in combat); the reader is mentioned to be an orphan (again, aren't all good superheroes); major pining from Dick - he has had a crush on the reader since they were kids (most of this is from his POV, so it's not specified if the reader has returned his feelings for just as long); mentions of canon character deaths; a lot of this is from Dick's POV so - warnings for Dick being emotionally constipated and referring to romantic feelings as a 'disease'; this is an AU where Dickkory never happened; mentions of canon violence - not described in graphic detail; mentions of the apocalypse/the world ending (and the anxiety this can cause); the reader is feeling extreme fear/anxiety due to the possible end of the world; technically - unresolved pining. I believe that's it.

A/N: The second part of the First Kiss series! I had a lot of fun with this one. This is the first really romantic fic I have written for Dick, and I enjoyed it so much omg. I was so tempted to write an enemies to lovers version with him, because he annoys me so much in the canon, and I feel like 'kissing in the middle of a heated argument' would work so well with his character - but maybe we'll save that one for Jason (or Hank, idk). instead, I went with emotionally constipated Dick Grayson, because that is sooo canon. he would not admit his feelings for someone if he had a gun to his head. and I had a lot of fun writing this mostly from his POV. I feel like he is such an interesting POV character to work with, so I might do more from him in the future. anyway, please enjoy!!

...

Stress.

There were few other words to describe the horrible feeling that was dense in the air around them.

Everyone was looking to Dick for answers, and unfortunately, he had none. Sebastian was missing, likely kidnapped by Mother Mayhem in order to complete a ritual that would likely mean the end of the world. Rachel had lost her powers and the Titans needed her unique form of magic now more than ever. Tim was impatient, annoyed because Dick wasn’t letting him use the minimal training that he had. But of course, Dick was hesitant to let the next would-be Robin off the bench after what had happened to Jason.

(Dick could barely bring himself to think about Jason these days.)

Kory was having difficulty controlling her newfound powers, and so was Gar. Which left the team weakened on all sides. Jinx was helpful on the magic front, but she was far from easy to control when it came to executing plans and corralling her rather wild personality.

And Dick didn’t even want to think about what was happening with Conner. He just had to pray that this whole shaved-head, Lex Luthor impression was part of his mourning for his would-be father, and hopefully - it would be temporary.

All of the chaos among the team left Dick leaning on you. As usual, you were likely the only person on the team who wasn’t experiencing any extreme drama. You were the only Titan with some true stability.

And you were the person on the team with the most experience. Even more than Dick himself. Beyond being part of the original Titans team that had helped to found The Tower, you had been trained under Oliver Queen, who was part of the Justice League as Green Arrow. Ollie had taken you on as his own child when your parents died and left him as your carer in their will. Naturally, early into your childhood, he had started training you in the art of combat and marksmanship - so you grew up with intense skill.

You and Dick met soon after he was adopted by Bruce. And much like Donna, you were a kind face and a wise voice that kept him mentally grounded well into adulthood. But you were also someone mischievous that made him smile; someone he could always turn to for a well timed laugh.

You always kept him sane.

And very much unlike Donna - soon after he met you, Dick started to develop feelings for you.

Of course, back then, it was just a silly crush. When he told Donna about it at the time, she laughed. And when he had hidden his face in embarrassment, she then told him that it was ‘cute’. She told him that you two would be good together when you got older. So naturally, Dick took her words as biblically concrete advice.

He decided that he should wait for you. That the two of you would be good together when you got older.

So he waited.

And he waited. And eventually - life got in the way.

He had a huge falling out with Bruce, things at the Tower went south. It was never the right time to tell you. How the hell could he tell his best friend that he had those big, terrifying feelings mounting inside of him, worsening each year like a disease?

It was never the right time to tell you because he was dodging disasters left and right and he needed you more as a friend than as a lover. He needed you as a brick wall to lean on. He needed you as that voice of common sense in his ear - the leader’s loyal first mate, giving him advice behind the curtain and keeping his head on straight.

He didn’t need to tell you about his awful, festering feelings and have you gone from his life too.

When Garth died, and then Jericho died and the Tower shuddered, it still didn't feel like the right time. Wounds were tender and even if you were never downright angry at him like everyone else was - you needed your space. Dick respected that.

That day, you stood at the mouth of the elevator, about to leave for Star City to go and lick your emotional wounds at Ollie’s for a while, and you looked at Dick with tears in your eyes - looked at him like you were waiting for him to say it. But it wasn’t the right time.

He still thought about you every single day when he was in Detroit. And then - he showed up at your door with a scared little girl, needing more advice, needing that brick wall again. It was only natural that when chaos found him, he needed your help.

He hated that your advice was to call in Dawn and Hank. He relied on you, and you relied on family. And he hated that they were waiting at your apartment, called against his will once he had left to do some more sleuthing.

But he found that you were right when he saw how Dawn bonded with Rachel, when Hank put up a vicious fight against those strangers who came to collect her in the name of her father.

Watching you get thrown off that roof sent Dick’s heart through his stomach. As he clung onto the rooftop with his fingers and the muscles of his arm burned, all he could think about was you. As you sputtered out blood and he cradled your head, unsure of how to help you, terror gripped him in a way that it never had before in his life, because he realized that he might actually lose the most important person in his life.

As you lay in the hospital, a set of machines barely keeping you alive, with Dawn loyally holding your hand in comfort and Hank seething to get revenge on the people who had hurt you - Dick ached with regret and not having told you.

Still, when you showed up at that house in Ohio, somehow magically awakened from your near death by Rachel's powers - Dick felt that it just wasn't the right time. He swallowed his regrets like ash in his mouth when he reunited with you, hugged you tight. He didn’t even consider telling you about his feelings to be on the radar of possibility.

When you came back to the Tower to help bring in Doctor Light - it just wasn't the right time. When you showed up in Gotham to help bring down Red Hood - it just wasn't the right time.

Even when Dick died and was brought back to life by some strange magical pit, a pool of waters that brought him dreams of a far off life with you - it still wasn’t the right time.

You were there to Dick's call, loyal and waiting, every single time. You looked at him with as much love and longing in your eyes as he needed (at least, according to Dawn and Donna you did) - but still, it never felt like the right time.

It never felt like the right time to destabilize his entire life by uprooting the one good friendship he had. It never felt like the right time to truly fuck things up with you.

Now, because of some cult that Dick believed to be long gone and a stupid blood ritual, the world was ending, and it still didn't feel like the right time.

He wasn't the son of a demon from another dimension, but he still felt cursed.

When Dick saw you slip out of the room, clearly trying to sneak away from the group, his stomach twisted with nerves. It was rare that you of all people cracked under the pressure. It was rare that you needed to escape from the madness for a breath. He mumbled an excuse to Kory and then chased after you, knowing that it wouldn't be hard to tell where he was truly going - but truthfully, he didn’t care.

He easily caught you in one of the late night deserted halls of STAR Labs.

The many glass walls overlooked the city - a collection of bright lights that made up Metropolis. Thousands of people that you never knew, that you had never met before. People that all seemed too important now as you contemplated their lives; thought about the fact that you might not be able to save them.

Dick saw the sickly look on your face, the glassy sheen of guilt in your eyes even from far off as you leaned on the polished titanium railing that separated the upper floors from the atrium. His footsteps echoed in the empty hall and you heard him approaching from far off. He made no effort to sneak up on you or conceal himself, not wanting to startle you when you were already in such a distressed state.

The minute you looked over your shoulder and saw him, your face broke from that dark, doomed frown into a haste smile, and you reached up to wipe away your tears, attempting to be subtle with that motion. You were trying to hide yourself from him.

Dick came to stand beside you, resisting the urge to pull you into his arms. He desperately wanted to shelter you away from any fear you might be feeling. Maybe it was selfish; wanting to hold you, wanting to protect you from anything in the world that could possibly harm you. Maybe it was downright idiotic - because realistically, he knew that couldn't protect you from this kind of harm. He couldn’t protect you from the world ending.

“Y/N-” Dick murmured your name gently, clutching a fist tightly by his side to resist the urge to reach out and soothe a hand over the trembling muscles of your jaw.

You were holding in a sob, and it came out as a harsh, sarcastic laugh instead.

“I know.” You said. “I know. You're doing that Team Leader Guy Thing.”

You tried to make it sound playful and joking, but with your voice wet and soaked with worry and fear, it came off as a pathetic bid to deflect.

Dick wasn’t sure how to reply. Because yes, he was doing that ‘Team Leader Guy Thing’. He was trying his best to, anyway.

“You're gonna ask ‘are you okay?’ and I'm gonna lie and say ‘I'm fine, boss. All good.’” You continued.

At least you were being straightforward about it being a lie.

Dick wished that he had something genuinely helpful to say, but his throat stalled with dryness and his chest ached at seeing you so distraught. It really wasn’t something that he was used to.

“I mean, it's not like it's the end of the world.” You let out another dry, sarcastic laugh.

Then, there was a moment of silence - a beat of realization as your chin quivered and more thick tears rimmed your eyes.

“It's - it's only the end of the world.” You spoke these words heavier, dropping any false laughter in your tone - it truly hit you. Any further jokes you could make left you.

Dick choked on his own tears when he heard the aborted sob in your chest - something that came out as a whimper when you reached up to clutch at your heart.

You were genuinely terrified. Terrified that the Titans wouldn’t be able to find a solution in time. Terrified that everyone was going to die. Not just the people you loved, but - everyone.

“Hey, come on.” Dick said, his leader instincts, his natural caring for you kicking in. “We've been through worse.”

Working with the Titans, you had been through a lot. Drug busts, battling against costumed psychopaths, the loss of a dear friend to a dangerous assassin. But you weren’t sure that you had been through something worse than this. Everything the Titans had been through had never affected the world on such a large scale.

“Have we?” You argued gently.

Perhaps not. Maybe the only time the team had been in such dire straits was the first time Trigon attempted to come to earth. But that had been when Rachel had been armed with her powers and had been prepared to take him down. But Dick wasn't going to voice those thoughts to you.

You waited in agony for him to say something, and your tears finally breached - rolling down your face in hot tracks, laying marks of the true fear you were feeling, laying it all bare for the first time. Dick knew that his own eyes reflected that same glossy hurt now, if only for the pain he felt in seeing you cry - something that was so incredibly rare over the time he had known you.

Dick reached out and gently cupped the side of your cheek, running his thumb across your face and wiping some of those tears away. You were so startled by the tenderness of the touch that you couldn't help but to let out a whimper, and you felt frozen as Dick spoke his next words.

“It's gonna be okay.” He told you, trying his hardest to sound confident in the words. “We're gonna get through this. I know we will.”

This time, unlike many before, you couldn't be inspired by his confidence.

“Have you - have you considered what happens if we don't?” Your voice barely reached above a whisper, barely daring to tempt fate with this possibility.

Honestly, Dick had not. In these kinds of situations, he didn't allow himself to focus too much on the negative. As the team leader, he did have to take all the possibilities into account. It was something he had to do in order to keep everyone safe. But if he focused too much on death and darkness, much like Bruce did, then he knew that paranoia would overtake him and his team would get caught in the crossfire.

He had to spend his time coming up with solutions to fix the problem rather than spending his time caught up in knots, worrying about what would happen if he fumbled and didn't actually fix things after all.

The literal end of the world? It just wasn't a possibility in this mind.

But right now, standing there, staring into your big eyes, glossed over with fear as you looked to him for answers - there was only one thing that Dick could think of.

And it was so incredibly selfish. It didn’t have anything to do with the team or being a good leader. It didn’t have anything to do with helping the others.

Dick brushed his thumb over your cheek again, an incredibly tentative touch that had your skin tingling. You let out a small sigh, and the world froze around you when he leaned in - slowly, moving toward you at a pace that more than gave you time to escape if you wanted to. But you found that you didn’t want to. You found his closeness to be an incredible comfort in these moments of mental chaos.

And so, he gently planted his lips on yours.

It should have come as a shock - your childhood best friend kissing you. But in that moment, it just felt right. All you could do was shut your eyes and lean into the kiss, reaching up to grip his wrist, keeping him close to you as you leaned into his smothering heat. His lips were surprisingly soft, and he tasted like coffee - using caffeine to keep himself awake for days, trying to marathon a solution against the impending doom.

His kiss was firm but so giving - a touch that easily swallowed you up with heat from the top of your head all the way down to your toes. It was a sensation that pushed out the rest of the world, smothered any worries about who or what might bring an end to it.

It was the most tender, but most wonderfully passionate kiss that you had ever experienced in your life.

When he pulled away, you sucked in a sharp breath, suddenly feeling incomplete without his lips on yours. The shock then began to set in, like pulling the knife from a stab wound and feeling the blood rush out of you freely. It created a dizzying mixture with the heat that was now boiling under your skin.

Why? Your brain screamed out as you stared at him. When? How long had he wanted to kiss you? How long had you been missing out on Dick Grayson?

Dick could see all those questions bubbling beneath your surface as the fear in your eyes shifted to confusion, and he finally decided to speak.

“I'm sorry.” He said quietly. “But if the world does end, I couldn't die without knowing what kissing you is like.”

“Dick-” You sighed, about to go on a long rant about how he could have done that years ago, about how he should have - and the end of the world was a shitty excuse.

But you abruptly cut off your own words when more footsteps squeaked down the hall - the rubber soles of sneakers scuffing against the polished floor.

Dick jumped away from you as though he had been burned, clearly wanting to keep the interaction private. Both of you tuned to see Gar approaching.

“Dick?” He posed. Gar had a look of confusion, clearly wondering if he should question what was going on between the two of you but swallowing it.

“Yeah?” Dick replied.

“Um - Conner's missing.” He announced this in a nervous, meek tone, not wanting to bring the team leader any more bad news.

“What?” Dick gaped.

There was no time to further discuss what Dick had said to you. With the end of the world in your hands, it easily fell to the back of your mind.

...

If you enjoyed this fic, check out my DC Titans Masterlist for more of my other fics!! And please consider reblogging and commenting on this fic to tell me what you liked about it.

#sundrop writes #dc titans #titans x reader #titans fanfiction #dick grayson #dick grayson x reader #dick grayson x gender neutral reader #dick grayson x gn reader #dick grayson imagine #dick grayson x you #titans hbo #dc titans fanfiction

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mellowwillowy · 3 months

Text

OOC content, angst(?) and fluff(?) idk, you get your warnings.

You were the mage General Lilia cherished after working together for years. How ironic seeing the fae who had once tried to slaughter the village you protected to become the General you stalked beneath the shadow of faes.

In exchange for your great fortitude in facing the General head-on in protecting the village you resided.

It was a routine. To be hidden somewhere away from prying eyes and to tend all the wounded faes the moment they returned from yet another departure. To wrap the bandages around the opened flesh wounds, to chant magic to quicken the healing pace, to ensure that there were no faes threatened by death and to cradle the fearsome General by his face.

“… it seemed like you got yourself into quite the trouble. The previous wound had not even healed completely and it’s torn open again...” Feeling the bloodied flesh, you winced at the sensation of feeling it. “You should have brought me along, that way I can minimize the damage inflicted-”

“No.” He quickly silenced you with a scowl, “Not only are you going to render the humans surprised, but even the faes that are not familiar with you might end up assuming that you should be killed off.”

Unable to retort any further, you showed him one of your rare dejected face, rendering him surprised for you had always been a rather emotionless… human.

“… humans shouldn’t be fighting alongside fae anyway.” Lilia nuzzled himself closer to you, his head shifted on your lap to find a more comfortable position for him to rest, “how about you chant spell on the wound instead of sulking?”

General Lilia most cherished mage, the mage that was hidden beyond prying eyes along with the mage’s flock. The only time he allowed himself to fool himself that it was merely a beneficial relationship and nothing sentimental.

So why was he bawling in tears as he came back to you laying on the bed, edged to death? He had lost enough, he had lost Meleanor in a devastating battle and he had to lose yet another cherished subject?

On the bed was you, lying cold as usual while you were pristine free from wounds. Your attendant could only cry as the humans you had once protected wept along.

Upon meeting the burgundy red slit eyes, you raised your hands to cradle his face as usual, but what erupted from your throat was not an expected farewell.

It was a curse.

“For what Meleanor had caused to me this day, I will return it to her descendant twicefold.”

You tried. You really tried to bring him along to your demise and he posed no struggle. Was it because he knew you couldn’t have done anything or was it because he had long lost his sanity? Stripped from those whom he held dear, he’d be happier if he followed them along no?

General Lilia’s most cherished mage, the Apple to his heart passed away on the same day his Lord did.

He could feel the squeeze of your hands to his throat yet it was only momentarily, abruptly stopped by your whole body falling limp to the curse of a sweet death.

General Lilia’s most cherished mage…

Enrolled into the Academy as a magicless student.

“Like I said!” Lilia halted his step, rendered surprised by the rather familiar voice and smell, “I am a mage, how could you assign me as a magic-less human? Aah~ should I give you a punch first-”

“Woah woah woah, hold your horse you brute!” Crowley immediately held you back by your arms before you could give the Dark Mirror a taste of your fist.

General Lilia’s most cherished mage… appeared right in front of Lilia's eyes. Nothing had changed from the way you looked aside from your behavior.

It took a moment before you noticed him in the room, busying yourself by chatting with the other housewardens.

“Ah?!” you pointed at the old fae, causing him to raise his eyebrows and tilted his head.

General Lilia’s most cherished mage…

An impostor?

He readied himself to strangle you once he proved himself right of you being an impostor. He’d make sure to not be caught doing so and let your body rot on the academy’s front gate.

“Lilia~! Long time no see!” you hopped onto him, arms snaked around his neck, his eyes widened in surprise. Perhaps this impostor tried to trick him? If so, he’d be happier to test the water before he cursed you to death.

“Heh, long time no see, whippersnapper.”

Lilia Vanrouge's most cherished doll.

#Lilia Vanrouge #Meleanor Draconia #TWST #Twisted Wonderland x Reader #Yandere Lilia Vanrouge x reader

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sturnmad · 5 months

Text

nick sturniolo x ftm!reader

um i wrote this for @hbpr1nce . it was meant to be a short little fluffy drabble but spiraled into a 2.6k+ friends-to-lovers monstrosity. idk

be aware my writing style is very different than most sturniolo x reader authors on this app. i use second person & generally avoid the use of y/n (I'd rather use an oc name if absolutely necessary). it's also really like... plot-y? reader-centric? i didn't even mean for that to happen. honestly this feels like a prequel, i might write a sequel.

also i forgor the exact timeline of Nick's coming out so i just winged it lmao

summary: you're nick sturniolo's childhood friend, basically follows you realizing you're a trans man w nick supporting you the whole time, + ur eventual getting together. angst+fluff, no smut.

warnings: romantic nick x ftm!reader, transphobia, body image/self-esteem issues, I'm posting w minimal editing so beware, uhhh thats it i think?

Nick's always been your biggest supporter.

He's one of your first friends, because in 3rd grade he's the only one who stands up to the teacher when she tries to send you to the office for something you didn't do. You remember it distinctly: Nick literally red in the face from all the yelling, Matt trying to calm him down.

Nick doesn't remember it at all, but you do, and you've been his friend ever since.

He's the first to understand you, back when you thought you just hated everything about yourself. You hated your hair, so you cut it off. You hated your body, so you covered it up.

You hated your name, too, but there was no real solution to that.

It’s just so flowery, you'd complain with a wrinkled nose. So common. It didn't fit your face. Maybe that was why you avoided mirrors (it wasn't, but you didn't know that at the time either).

On what must be the thousandth time you complain of it, Nick rolls his eyes and says, “Just change it.”

“What?”

He waves a hand. “Just go by a nickname or something. Change it legally when you're older, if you want.”

Huh. For some reason that never occurred to you.

You cycle through a few nicknames, mostly just shortenings of your first and middle names, but none of those feel right either. Again, it's Nick that solves the issue, suggesting a few names until he lands on one that just… fits.

When you ask your other friends to call you by it, one of them asks, “Isn't that a boy’s name?”

He doesn't say it rudely or anything. You freeze anyway, because again, you didn't think about that, and again, Nick comes to your rescue. “It's gender neutral, dumbass,” he says good-naturedly. Your friend laughs and the moment passes by.

(You don’t notice, but Nick watches you closely from the corner of his eye. He looks like a theory was just confirmed.)

A few months after you change your name, you hear some kids talking in the hall about a trans student, saying—well. Nothing good.

Your hands go numb. Your stomach churns violently, and for the life of you, you can't figure out why. Obviously it’s shitty of them to say that, but high school is awful and you've overheard worse without freaking out over it.

You dismiss it as a freak coincidence.

Your anxiety gets worse, and quarantine doesn't help. Your parents are especially paranoid about the virus, so you barely leave your house.

There are up-sides, though. You talk with Nick almost every day now. Apparently his entire house burned down, so he's stuck in a tiny apartment with his parents and three brothers. He's fairing well, though, and he's one of your only friends who keeps in touch with you.

When he calls, he always uses the name you chose for yourself (or did he choose it?). These days, he’s the only one who does.

Nick comes out to you on a warm August afternoon.

“Holy shit,” you say. “I mean, that's great, man.” You wince. ‘Great’ doesn't seem like the right word to use there, but what else are you supposed to say? “Does anyone else know?”

“Yeah.” You hear a sigh of relief, and your heart clenches at the thought that Nick would hold even a sliver of fear of your reaction. “Nate, Max—a few others… Matt and Chris don't know, yet.”

Your jaw drops. “What? You haven't told them?” Nick and his triplet brothers told each other almost everything. You figured they'd be first on the list.

You remembered, vaguely, a conversation where you asked Nick if he had any secrets from Matt and Chris. He'd hesitated before shaking his head.

Huh, you thought. ‘No secrets’, my ass.

“Yeah,” Nick said like he’d had this conversation before. “I don't know why. I know they'd be fine with it, obviously, but it's just… a lot of work, y’know? They might be weird about it. No, they definitely will be. That's almost worse.”

You frowned. Granted, you weren't as close with Matt and Chris as you were with Nick, but they'd never struck you as homophobic. And they'd always been close with Nick, closer than most siblings. You couldn't imagine them reacting negatively.

Still, you understood Nick’s nervousness. That was big news to drop. One way or another, everything would change.

“They might be a little weird about it,” you admitted. “But they'll get over it. Probably. Either way, you've gotta do it eventually so may as well get it over with, right?”

“Yeah.” The word was tinged with frustration. “I know. I'll do it soon. Probably.”

It's not a surprise when, on their next call, he announces he's done it. You congratulate him, and the two of you talk about life in general, though there aren't many updates. Your mind is elsewhere, and you think Nick senses it because you say your goodbyes a few minutes later.

In your mind, you turn it over and over again in your head. Nick is gay and he came out and everything is fine. Everyone is cool with it. And even though at this point you haven’t admitted anything to yourself—

Something inside you untenses.

***

When you see Nick in person for the first time in over a year, you almost double over in envy.

It comes from nowhere. It completely blindsides you. He steps into the cafeteria with Matt and Chris by his side and you're suddenly so jealous you could puke.

He just looks really good, actually smiling and happy and tall. That's the only reason you're jealous, you decide, as Chris nearly shoves Nick into a table. Nick had a glow-up but quarantine only made you uglier, inside and out. Of course you'd be jealous.

To your surprise, Nick singles you out first out of all his friends. “Hey.” He smiles. It's a gentle smile, and he looks so happy and good and—did you mention he’s tall? At least taller than you, though that's not saying much. You're short enough that you almost never get mistaken for a boy, and when you do, it’s usually because of your short hair.

But you and Nick have the same hair length.

Huh. Same hair, similar style (yours perhaps even more ‘masculine’ than his), but no one ever mistakes you for a man after they see your face or hear your voice. Your stomach twists in envy again at the thought, this time with a distinct undercurrent of self-loathing.

If I looked like you…

(I probably wouldn't hate myself so much.)

It's just because Nick looks so good, though.

***

It's a snowball effect after that.

It's like Nick coming out put the concept on transness on your radar. You find yourself reading articles about it late at night. Just out of curiosity, you tell yourself.

But being trans would explain a lot about you. Almost everything, really.

One night you stare at yourself in the bathroom mirror. That's something you don't usually do. You don't like your body. You don't like your face. And for the first time, you're thinking:

Why? What don't I like about it?

The fat on your stomach. The fat around your waist. Your mom always says you have “child-bearing” hips, a comment that never fails to disgust you.

Your chest. You hate when people comment on it or acknowledged its existence at all. Bra shopping is a nightmare and necessary evil. Do most women feel like that?

Maybe. You doubt it.

You go by a man's name.

You wear men's clothes.

You look like a man…almost. From certain angles.

You want to look like a man.

That’s true. You do.

In here, at least, you can finally admit something. Only to yourself, and only for now, and only partially.

But you're maybe, kind of, at least 80% sure you're trans.

Fuck, you think. I'm screwed.

***

You come out to Nick in a McDonald's parking lot. It's oddly fitting.

Usually, you wouldn't do it all in one go. You'd test the waters first. Mention trans people in passing and see how the other person reacts. Maybe say a few things like ‘sometimes I just wish I was a guy, y'know?’

With most of your other friends, you could get away with that. They may be confused, they may side-eye you, but they wouldn't understand and they wouldn't confront you about it.

Nick isn't like that. He'd know, even if he didn't say anything. Better to just rip the bandaid off.

You wait until the others leave the car to pick up their orders. You and Nick stay behind like you always do.

You suck in a breath. Talking to Nick has always been easy. He's loud, you're loud—you accommodate, build off of each other. The silence feels unnatural in comparison to your usual easy banter.

“I think, um—” Your voice cracks and you cough. A strong start. You had a script but you're forgetting it. “I think I'm… probably not a woman.”

That's it. That's the closest you've gotten—that's all you know. ‘Probably not a woman’. Probably a man, but hey, there were other possibilities, and you just figured this out a few weeks ago so give yourself a break.

Nick is silent a second too long. You start to panic. “Like, I think I'm trans.” Your voice goes up at the end like it's a question.

It's not. You're certain. You made sure you were certain long before you came out.

“Thank you for telling me,” Nick says awkwardly. You nearly laugh; his floundering is oddly soothing. “Do the others—”

“No.” You shake your head. “No one else knows.”

“Oh, wow. Um… how long have you known?”

You think for a moment. “I guess I always have, even if I didn't have the words for it. But I didn't know for sure until a few weeks ago.”

“So… do you have a name picked out?”

You stare at him, confused. You can see the others exiting McDonald’s in the background. “What?”

“I mean,” Nick backpedals, puts up his hands like he's offended you, “Most trans people change their name, and no offense, but you don't don't really have a guy’s name, so I was just wondering—”

“I do, though,” you say. “The nickname you gave me.”

Nick says nothing, just sort of stares at you, and for some reason your face grows hot.

(He really does look good, you think, and wow this is such an inappropriate time to be having that thought.)

Then the others bang on the windows and demand to be let in, and the moment is ruined.

***

It gets worse before it gets better.

You decide not to come out to your parents until you absolutely have to. You do, however, come out to the rest of the friend group, and they're mostly accepting.

But it's not like you press a button and become a man overnight. Word gets around, and though no one says anything to your face, you hear them laugh behind your back. Some of your teachers who had been fine calling you by your nickname beforehand refuse to use it anymore.

You don't let it get to you. You give as good as you get. Still, as always, Nick is your biggest supporter. You don't know what you'd do without him.

***

You stay friends, but you fall out of touch.

It happens. You still text on birthdays, still congratulate him on his channel, still send each other memes on Instagram, but one day you blink and realize you haven't actually seen him in almost a year.

You've been busy. You have your own life, your own friends, but Nick is your best and oldest one. Always has been, and you're hoping always will be. So of course you text “hey, next time you're in Boston we should hang out or smth” and of course he agrees.

You suggest McDonald's, just for old time's sake, but Nick insists you go to an actual restaurant. He picks a more expensive one, and as you're trying to work out a polite way to say “thanks, but I'm way too poor for that”, he texts:

NICK: my treat btw

YOU: nah man you don't have to

YOU: but we might have to go somewhere cheaper sorry

NICK: it’s fine. i'll pay. i probs owe u hundreds from hs still lmao

YOU: true true

YOU: if you're sure

Nick never answers, which you assume means ‘yes’.

You show up almost half an hour early. You brought your wallet and you're prepared to put up a valiant fight for your fair share of the bill, bank account be damned.

You’re also anxious like you havent been since high school, probably. You don't know why. Nick's your friend, after all, even if you've drifted apart a bit. There's nothing to be anxious about.

Nick shows up ten minutes early.

Huh, you think, and then stop thinking.

At least you weren't completely blindsided this time. You knew what Nick looked like from his channel and his Insta, but he’s… different in person.

He’s even better. You don't think you're ugly (not anymore, at least), but you're no supermodel. Nick is, or he could be, definitely.

He hugs you, and when he leans back he looks you up and down and frowns. “You grew.”

You shrug. “Side effect of testosterone.”

“That makes you grow?”

“It can if you start it before twenty.” Your face grows hot. Here Nick is, some airbrushed God, and you're going through second puberty. You have acne. You have the little shitty mustache you used to mock boys for.

You have gained a few inches, though. Now you're about level with Nick’s chin instead of his chest. Makes hugs a bit more awkward.

Nick is still frowning at you. “Are these a side effect, too?” He squeezes your bicep before stepping back.

Your face burns even hotter. “Sort of. I work out.” You flex on instinct, and you swear Nick’s eyes follow the movement with just a little too much heat.

You must be hallucinating.

You expect the dinner to be awkward. And it is, at first, until Nick clears his throat and says, “I have a confession to make.”

You eye him warily. He seems serious. “What is it?”

Nick fidgets, avoiding your eyes. “You know the name I gave you?”

“Yeah?”

“The one that's now your legal name?”

“What about it?”

Nick covers his mouth with his hand. His shoulders shake with silent laughter. “It—” He wheezes. “It was my cousin’s pet turtle’s name!”

You gape.

And just like that, it's like nothing ever changed.

You burst into laughter. “I can't believe it,” you hiss. “And you never told me?”

“I was just listing off names I knew,” he says apologetically. “It could've been worse. You could've been named after my cousin.”

“Oh my god.” You cover your face with your hands. “Is that why Matt and Chris looked at me so weird when I told them?”

Nick starts laughing again. “Yeah. I'm sorry, man.”

You uncover your face and sigh, shaking your head. “Where are they, anyways?” You ask. “I thought they'd come with you.” Though now that you thought about it, Nick never said ‘we’ in his texts, only ‘I’. Huh.

“They wanted to say hi,” Nick says apologetically. “I made them stay home.”

“Why?”

To your surprise, Nick goes red.

It all clicks into place. The fancy restaurant. Nick’s insistence on paying. The fucking bicep squeeze.

You smile and lean forward. “Nick Sturniolo,” you say. “Is this a date?”

Nick, to his credit, recovers quickly. “If you want it to be,” he says softly. He actually meets your eyes and everything.

You meet his, too.

“I do.”

#nick sturniolo #nick sturniolo x male!reader #nick sturniolo x reader #sturniolo #sturniolo triplets #nick sturniolo x ftm!reader

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nnnyxie · 6 months

Note

More Fan!Izuku because it’s sO good-

Imagine Fan!izu x Streamer!Reader..basing this off of myself shamelessly🤭 basically reader is like a singer or something…like does choir(me🤭)and sings in bands(also me🤞) and musical theater(surprise, me‼️)..also plays an instrument…but something fancy like harp yk?(I Play the harp💅) And they do like cosy lil streams of just singing and playing their instrument and Izu as the busy lil hero he is just likes their voice it somehow enchants him??? Helps him relax and calm down and he just loves hearing it and rewinding to it after a long day and reader ofcourse a loyal Deku fan but because reader is ✨shy✨ they don’t show their face while streaming (I just love any kind of reveals of identity idk) and they also keep their background minimal to not give away anything about them but one das they just have a little fangirling moment showing off their new favorite Deku Figurine and hearing praise from them drives Izu insane(in a good way) and yeah idk hope that gives you a good baseeee

#𖢥 izuku anon

omg choir twinsies !!

(also i love the harp??? i have NO CLUE how to play but it’s just so!!!! ahhh!!!! it’s so pretty look and sound wise)

so yk that one artist that does the omnichord songs?? so like— that’s what you do EXCEPT!!

it’s not the omnichord!! it’s the harp!!!

rn i’m a teensy bit obsessed with lana del ray and mitski so!!! you mainly perform their songs <3

i wholeheartedly believe izuku is ‘i bet on losing dogs’ by mitski and ‘dark paradise’ by lana del ray personified!!! (lowkey projecting?)

our dear boy loves when you perform their songs. he’s tried listening to the original artists but— your covers just hit different yk?? your covers are just so pretty!!

he found you thanks to ochako and mina!! one day they were talking about streamers and youtubers they watch (because mina games obvi) and ochako talked about your streams and your channel!! she talked about how your musical talent was amazing and how soft your voice was!! izuku loves trying out things his friends like so he decided to give you a shot!!!

and he just fell in love— the moment you said ‘hi’, he felt like fainting.

from then on, he started falling asleep to your videos, and tuning into your streams when he had the free time.

from time to time you’ll do asmr streams. like whispering and talking about your day!! talking about some of the new things you’ve gotten or some of your favorite heroes!!

when you do these asmr streams they always somehow lead to you ranting about pro hero deku!!

izuku usually isn’t around when you do these asmr streams but today??? this night??? right now??? he can!! and he most definitely will!! he was lucky enough to have today off and spent the majority of the day binging your videos while catching up on sleep.

anyways

he was cooking dinner (i like to think that he cooks dinner for his mom when he visits) when he heard a ‘ting’ (he keeps his sound notifs on for work!!)

he went to check it andddd it was a twitch notif from your channel!! the title being:

asmr chat pt.15 ; p.o. box

he’s quick to open the app, immediately pressing on your streaming clip.

“hello everyone!” you whispered. only your desk showed. it had various bags and wrapped boxes on top. “i was sent gifts through my p.o. box and i’ve decided to open them on stream.” you ran your hands over a box. “we’ll open this one first!”

as you sifted through each gift, you grew increasingly excited. your fans knew you well— as they all had gotten you some form of pro hero deku merch!!

when it came to your last box, it was a sweatshirt. the fabric was soft and the perfect texture. the design— the design was your favorite. it was black with small, thin green writing of his hero name on the forearms. the upper left front of the jacket had a green outline of his hero helmet. the sweatshirt also had green accents— his signature green on all of this, of course.

“i really appreciate all of these! you all know me so well! ah! i’m seriously in awe of all of these!!” you smiled behind the camera. “i love deku, he’s my favorite hero. ever since he started out, i knew he’d be the best. he’s always saving everyone with a smile, and god— it’s amazing! he’s amazing! i don’t know him personally but i’m sure that he’s just as kind on tv as he is in real life.” you ran your hand over the outline on the sweatshirt. “i bet he’s just as cute too,” you laughed along with the chat. they knew about your big crush on the pro hero and would tease you about it during small talks like this. izuku’s face flushed and it grew hotter as he read through the comments.

oilspill.in.a.cup : manifesting the love of ur life for you bae!!!

veianna.sausagezzz : ur in love w/ him atp just find him nd kiss him

nylie.kei : VEIANNA THATS ASSAULT??

pinky✔︎ : wiggles eyebrows

you laughed as you read through these. “i’ll have to agree with nylie, here. no matter how pretty his lips are, i wouldn’t do that.”

izuku typed out a comment— not sure whether to send it or not. you two have developed a sort of parasocial relationship with one another, a one-sided admiration. though, now it isn’t exactly one-sided.

he decides to send it though. ignoring the absolute anxiety he’s feeling as he waits for your reaction.

midoriya.izuku✔︎ : i dunno, i wouldn’t mind one!

carpool.toenail : AYO!?

vieanna.sausagezzz : SEEEEEEE SEEEEE @/nylie.kei

oilspill.in.a.cup : MANIFESTED 😩🤌

nylie.kei : OHMYGODBSLEVSLDB

pinky✔︎ : IZUKU??????

“oh— uhm. oh.” you were flustered. honestly, you couldn’t speak. you were both extremely embarrassed and very flattered. and very happy that he watches your streams. “uhm i gotta go clean up— see you all later!”

edit;

omg i forgot to add an end note????

ANYWAYS!! had fun writing this heheheh

#mha x reader #bnha x reader #my hero academia x reader #boku no hero x reader #izuku x reader #midoriya x reader #deku x reader #izuku midoria x reader #/ᐠ - ˕ -マ works — ♡︎#♡︎ — izuku anon

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wen-kexing-apologist · 6 months

Text

The Left Hand of God

OKAY! SO!

I know I said like, literally two days ago that I was as of yet unable to write meta for this show. Because there is so much mystery and we don’t have the answers yet.

BUT!

There are benefits to talking about this show with friends, especially friends who are not watching Shadow, and are only seeing patterns based on what I tell him. Because my dear friend @so-much-yet-to-learn heard about the gay boy (Nai), the boy who was fighting the system (Trin), and the boy who has completely rejected filial piety (Dan) and immediately came up with the theory that the Shadow or, rather, the ghosts that all these boys can see are visible because they are breaking from tradition.

And in conversation with @slayerkitty earlier about the preview for the second half and the trailer for the show, and arms and hands (are we surprised this is where I am going?) I realized a pattern that I hadn’t quite picked up on.

Left Hands.

Now, depending on your level of involvement in religion, you may be more or less aware of where I am going with this. I was not raised religious, I had minimal knowledge of the significance of left hands in religion. But boy oh boy do I now. (If you are better versed in religion than I am, I invite you to please read me for filth and make and let me know what mistakes I made in writing this).

ANYWAY. To sit at the right hand of God is an honor, and there are a few references to sitting at God’s right hand in the Bible. According to Vexen Crabtree, there is a right hand path in religion that is associated with goodness, while the left hand path is considered evil. In certain cultures the left hand is considered to be unclean.

Essentially, the left hand is considered to be Satanic and can be associated with the occult. Why is this important?

How accurate is all of this? Idk, but I’m rolling with it for the sake of the argument!

Because in Shadow almost all of the Shadow and ghost shit happens on the left. In fact, every single injury that occurs in the show (so far) occurs on the left-hand side. @so-much-yet-to-learn’s theory about the Shadow is that Dan, Nai, and Trin can see ghosts/are being pursued by ghosts and shadows because they are breaking societal norms. Therefore they are evil, they are deviant, and they must be saved from continuing down The Left Hand Path.

Anyway, shall we look at some instances of left hands in Shadow? Of course we should!

Episode 1

Episode 1 starts out immediately with the first left-arm related injury of the series. It is hard to see, I completely missed it the first time I watched (and to show it clearly, I had to up the brightness in this image), but Trin’s left arm is bandaged. We do not yet know what the injury is, or how he got it. But, he is wounded nonetheless.

Things we know about Trin that could tie him to the “deviant” left-handed path: 1) Trin is queer, 2) Trin was fighting for institutional change at his school, 3) Trin was (apparently) using narcotics to treat his (extremely stigmatized) mental illness.

Left Hand Injury Count: 1

When Dan enters the pool for the first time, the Shadow, a Shadow? grabs a hold of him and he drowns. Where was Dan grabbed? His left ankle.

After Dan nearly dies in the pool, and Nai sees the Shadow that tried to drown Dan, Nai pulls Dan aside for a conversation about ghosts. Nai confesses to Dan that when he was a child, he listened to a voice in his head that asked him to play with it, and he wound up with a scar. It is an old wound, we can assume how he got it, but when he shows Dan the scar, it is a cut on his wrist. Which wrist? The left.

What do we know about Nai that could tie him to the “deviant” Left Hand Path? 1) he’s queer.

Left Hand Injury Count: 2

Episode 2

There are no left hand injuries in Episode 2, but there is still a lot of left-sided imagery

When Dan is telling Nai some of his backstory after they finish cleaning the chapel, Nai puts a comforting hand on Dan’s left shoulder. Dan tells Nai “You’re making an excuse to wipe your hand on my shirt as well. You got it all dirty” (not necessarily the strongest argument, but I wanted to note it because the left hand is considered unclean. Nai may be using his right hand, but he is adding dirt to Dan’s left side).

Dan gets in to his first fight with Anan and winds up having his wounds treated by Nai. Again, it’s not a left hand, but when Dan gets punched by Anan, he is injured on the left side of his face. (again, I understand this makes sense because Anan is right handed, but this is part of a trend, okay? hush.)

Left Side Injury Count: 1

We see Nai’s old injury in the flashback where he tells Dan his backstory and Anan ends up falling asleep on Nai’s left side.

When the Shadow appears at the piano, it appears on Dan’s left.

Episode 3

Dan sits on the left side of the monk when he is getting help navigating his lucid dreams and his connection to the Shadow.

When Dan first starts using that Lucid Dreaming Stone, he wears it on his left hand.

Episode 4

When Dan first arrives at the hospital to visit his father during the day, with Brother Anurak, Dan is standing on his father’s right side. Dan has spent a not insignificant amount of time this episode being told by Brother Anurak that he should visit his father, being told by Brother Anurak that he should forgive his father, and with the right side being associated with goodness, it makes some sort of sense, to me at least, that when he is under the supervision of the Brother, Dan would maintain appearances. But, in the evening, as he is waiting for his father to die, Dan sits on his father’s left.

In the evening, when Brother Anurak is not around, Dan slips in to a memory and winds up at a table with his father. His father asks for forgiveness and Dan does not give it to him. Dan confronts his father, makes his disdain for his father and his actions abundantly clear, calls his father by his first name, and beats the ever living fuck out of him. At this his father laughs, makes a comment about how Dan is just like him, and then dies. Interestingly, when Dan is grappling with engaging with his anger and beating up his father, it is his right hand that is bloody. (Again, this is not surprising because Dan is right-handed so naturally he’s going to throw punches with his dominant hand).

Dan wakes up, still on his fathers left just in time to watch him flatline. Coming out of this scene, what do we know about Dan that could tie him to the “deviant” Left Hand Path: 1) he does not engage in filial piety. Dan does not do what the adults, what his society expects him to do. Dan does not forgive his father. Dan disrespects his father. Dan denounces him. Dan does not honor his father’s dying wish. That is a huge deviation in my eyes from other shows I have watched with complicated, harmful family dynamics.

Episode 5

In the theater, Nai sees Trin following behind their teacher. Nai and Dan follow their theater teacher back to his office, where Nai promptly makes direct eye contact with Trin. Nai’s reaction is to grab Dan’s left hand, until Dan covers Nai’s eyes.

Nai is knocked over and he falls. This time it is Dan’s turn to tend to Nai’s wounds, and lo and behold, what do we have here? Another left sided injury, this time the knee. This one is notable to me only in the sense that left sided facial injuries can easily be justified by the fact that the person doing the punching is right handed. But Nai falls, so he didn’t have to skin his left knee. But he did.

Left Sided Injury Count: 2

Also, something that I did notice, (and I have not been keeping track of positionality of the living breathing characters and where they stand cause then I’d be here for a million years) is that in the flashback where Trin meets up with Nai at the lake and Trin reveals himself as Nai’s chat friend he is sitting on Nai’s left.

Episode 6

IT’S MONSTERFUCKER TIME!!!!!!!!!!! *air horn noises*

Dan smokes some weed and then falls asleep, only to be confronted by the Shadow. He sits his ass down, spreads his legs open, and has a lovely little wet dream. But when we see the Shadow engaging in some incorporeal sex stuff, the camera is focused on Dan’s left side. And hey, while we’re at it, let me just point out that every single time the Shadow appears to Dan at night, when he is sleeping? The frame we get where the Shadow looms over Dan and slowly sinks down to meet him? Always shot from Dan’s left side.

Now, we don’t know what Dan’s past experience with sex is like, but you can bet your ass that getting fucked by a Shadow would put Dan solidly in to the Sexual Deviancy category in the eyes of society. (I feel the need to state that only because this is the monsterfucker website, so I know our reaction to Dan and the Shadow doing some foolin’ around would not necessarily be the same).

When Dan wakes up in the morning, he notices some scratches on his arm and shoulder.

Which arm and shoulder? You got it! His left!

And it doesn’t have to be his left arm, right? Like, just because the scene before he wakes up showed us Dan’s left side, does not mean the Shadow, which is incorporeal, and has on more than one occasion wrapped two arms around Dan (left and right), has to have scratched up only his left arm. We can potentially add two more types of deviancy to Dan’s roster by the time he wakes up: 1) drug use, 2) sexual relationship to the occult

Left Hand Injury Count: 3

The story continues, and Dan at one point uses the restroom. He wipes his face with a cloth, it comes back stained black, and he looks up to see, who? Trin! Standing on which side of him? Left!

Episode 7

We open with Dan in the Funhouse, staring at a three-paned mirror. We know that when he looks in this mirror he will see two different people on either side of him in the mirror. But he is only shown in close up looking in one direction…his left.

Dan gets beaten up by Anan and sent to the infirmary where he is once again sexed up by the Shadow while being shot from his left side. Under SMYTL’s theory about the people who can see ghosts and shadows being those that are deviating from societal expectations, we have Dan going deeper in to a potential sexual awakening here.

Because of his fight with Anan, Dan once again ends up with wounds on the left side of his face.

Left Sided Injury Count: 3

Flashback to a similar scene with Trin, where Anan is being forced to apologize for fighting. I am assuming at this point I don’t need to say it…

Left Sided Injury Count: 4

(Side Note: Anan has a lot of fucking anger in his heart, idk fully what his problem is but I’m guessing abuse from his parent [I mean we do see him get slapped] and/or the #tired approach of internalized homophobia being externalized as violent homophobia against Known Gays).

Dan sees the Shadow again during rehearsals for Hamlet, and once again, the Shadow appears on Dan’s left, and I have to believe by this point that it is intentional that we see so much of the Shadow and Dan’s reaction to it from the left side, because Dan is standing on a stage right now. The film crew could have easily had the Shadow appear on the right. But they didn’t.

Dan has lost his lucid dreaming stone, and then gets shunted in to some sort of dream, vision, or other form of communication with a Shadow that is the most corporeal and condensed it has ever been, looking far more human than smoke. There he finds some drawings, and sees a man locked in a dungeon, handcuffed to a table.

He wakes up, goes about his day, and he ends up in the village listening to interviews of villagers talking about the wild ghosts that haunt the town. Where he learns about…

The One Armed Man. (you know where this is going).

The One Armed Man lost his left arm (I’ll use an image of the drawing, rather than the image of his bloody stump for people who are more blood averse).

We learn from the villager that the One Armed Man was a boxer, he joined the Navy, and one day when he was aboard the ship, the chain from the anchor…

“Tore his left arm right off.”

Left Hand Injury Count: 4

What do we come to learn about the One Armed Man that may tie him to the “deviant” Left Hand Path? 1) he sells himself to homosexual millionaires, 2) he starts working on a party boat and giving people narcotics 3) he maintains contact with “sexual deviants” after he is jailed [potentially 4) he uses narcotics himself, I say potentially here because the villager only says he gave others narcotics, but the vision flashbacks we get from Dan show O.A.M. cooking opioids over candle flame]

Promo for Episodes 8-14

According to the promo for the second half of this show, Dan will get yet another left arm injury bringing the (future) Left Hand Injury Count to (at least) 5.

Original Show Trailer

Now, based on the clip that follows, I am like 99% confident that this is Trin, so I think we find out how he ends up with an injured arm at the beginning of Episode One.

All of this to say that I think @so-much-yet-to-learn is on to something with the shadows and ghosts being seen by societal deviants and that the show is trying to indicate that with it’s strong use of left handed/left path imagery.

Alright, I’m off to watch all of Brother Anurak’s scenes again, because for some reason this visual of the One Armed Man looks like Brother Anurak to me, and I want to see if he actually uses his left arm.

#shadow the series #singto prachaya #fluke natouch #utt uttsada #fiat patchata

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td-yuri-takes · 29 days

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i want to organise some kind of total drama femslash/wlw prompts week for artists and writers, maybe with certain days allocated for popular ships, other days allocated for rarepairs, etc. only i am so worried it will end up being ignored? i remember last year when someone tried to organise a gwourtney week and there was only like 3-4 writers posting fics every day and a few of the same artists posting on both twitter and tumblr.

idk this is kind of a ramble but it’s just upsetting seeing wlw ships and content being consistently overlooked by this fandom. i don’t blame the writers or artists who participated or even the organisers of the event at all, it’s just clear to me that this fandom has no space for wlw to make content that gets popular and is properly appreciated. the only people actively caring about these things are wlw. i feel like i see people say “why dont wlw just make content themselves if they want it so much.” WE DO. WE DO!!!! it’s just upsetting and a little disheartening to continue making content that you actively put a lot of effort into only for it to be disregarded by everyone else. things like hits and kudos and comments DO matter, those things encourage me to write so much because i love knowing i have actually made an impact on people, but when you get minimal responses from the fandom in comparison to m/m pairings or f/m pairings it just kinda sucks. anyway. thats me out

I actually made this blog for this exact reason!!!

#td yuri takes #total drama #tdi #total drama island #td

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makeitastrength · 2 months

Note

Since you asked me, I'd love to see your takes on your top vulnerable Tim moments!

Oh gosh, I feel like we're gonna have identical lists again. But just think… soon we might have brand new vulnerable Tim scenes to add to our lists!! Ahhh happy season 6 premiere day!!!

But anyway, here goes:

1x01

To see him go from punishing Lucy to a trembling jaw and tears in his eyes in a matter of minutes… ugh. Gets me every time. The man is in so much pain. And especially now looking back on this and knowing what we know about Tim and how hard he tries to suppress his emotions, it really drives home just how vulnerable he was in that moment.

DOD

There are so many moments throughout this storyline. When he tells Angela he needs her. In the gym with Lucy in 2x12. When he admits in 2x17 that he’s been blaming himself for her kidnapping. In no way am I minimizing Lucy’s trauma, but DOD was traumatic for Tim as well and really served as a vessel for him to begin opening himself up to Lucy more and more.

4x09

Really, the entire episode. You can see how much pain he's in and how deeply this trauma runs.

But especially that scene in the hallway. Ugh. I cry every time. This is the most vulnerable we’ve ever seen him. He’s in so much pain and that pain runs so deep, and not only is he letting it show, but he’s trusting Lucy to hold him together while it tears him apart.

5x08

I will forever be so proud of Tim for how he put himself out there in this moment. He really risked it all because he knew it was worth it, and it's amazing to think this is the same man whose heart had been shredded to pieces by love when we first met him.

5x21

Do these two still need to have an honest an in depth conversation about UC? Very much so. But here, we see Tim being more vulnerable about it than he's ever been with her and that's a start. And idk what it is, exactly, but there's just something about the way he cradles her neck as he hugs her that speaks to how visceral his fear is and how utterly terrified he is of losing her.

Honorable Mentions

I’m just now realizing you didn’t specify “top 5” but my brain assumed that’s what I was doing so I’m just gonna go with it and throw in these final two as honorable mentions:

1x20

The man was scared, and this is one of the only times I think we’ve ever actually seen Tim Bradford allow his fear to show.

5x02

Because you know he knew that conversation was gonna hurt.

#asked and answered #queseraone #chenford #tim bradford #lucy chen

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vixendoesstuff · 2 months

Text

Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3

ALRIGHT, SO-

World Tour, where (please excuse my language) shit hits the fan, for real. My notes on this saga is hectic and convoluted, so I'll try to make some sense of it for this post. If you have any questions, feel free to ask in the askbox or my DM's, whichever you prefer.

I wanted to do bullet points for this, but maybe most Tumblr users prefer to read long paragraphs than bullet points, since my posts not having bullet points do better? IDK, I've only been on Tumblr for like, a year at best so forgive this soul for her cluelessness lol.

And also, depending on how much I've typed, I might have to split this saga into three parts, 'cause I know y'all don't actually want to read a really long post that took up three scrolls wide lol.

Anyway--let's start this crazy train.

So, the story begins the same way as it is in the movie--opening shot with Cloud Guy giving a quick recap about the first movie, and then the next shot panning towards the Techno Trolls (ay, Branch's tribe, let's go!). Unfortunately, the amount of screentime (or appearance in this case) they got here minimal, since we're focusing on Branch and co.

But anyway, same thing happened, King Trollex hosting the rave, Barb barges in demanding his string and destroyed Techno Reef to get him to comply, same old. Poor guy, honestly, he just wanted to vibe.

Next shot pans to Pop Village, same thing there. Everyone is smiling and singing and dancing (with Techno!Branch joining in, look at that! Since he can't extend his hair like everyone else, he relies on acrobatics and just generally hang onto someone ((mostly Poppy)) whenever they swing on the trees with their hair). Branch tries to confess his love to Poppy, but got friendzoned unintentionally by her (ouch). Then Barb's bat pet thing comes in, and King Peppy's history lesson.

They're not the only ones here in this world. There are other trolls out there; Pop, Hard Rock, Classical, Country, Funk, and Techno.

This is where it gets interesting. At this point in time, Branch has all but accepted that he's possibly the only Troll in the village that looks the way he does. That he's the only one that ever existed in the world. It's why he and Cooper has a sort of closer bond with eachother in this AU : different Troll (tribe, but not that they knew this yet) solidarity. Sure, he was curious once, like how come is egg was in the Troll Tree, why does he look different, ect. But now he's more than content with his current predicament. He has friends now, something to look foward to; he was happy, after so long.

But now with the news that there are other Trolls out there, different from the rest, his past yearning came back to life. And while King Peppy hadn't said it outright, his lack of words all but confirmed Branch's suspicions. That he's not the only one out there. And from what he saw in the scrapbook, he can pinpoint which one of the tribes he supposedly belongs to; Techno.

Then we cut to when Poppy packs up to leave and got caught by Branch. The same argument happens, with the addition of Poppy saying that because there are different Trolls out there, then shouldn't Branch be curious about them? Who knows, maybe there's a tribe that looks exactly like him! Branch refuted by saying that, even if there was a tribe just for him, how would he connect to them? He's been living as a "Pop Troll" his whole life, what connection can he form with these hypothetical Trolls (identity issues go brrr)? What if they found out that he's gone Grey for almost all his life? If the Pop Trolls, who has known him since he was born, didn't react well to his whole Grey-ness; what are the chances his own kind would react badly to the news? Or worse, reject him outright.

Before he could go on, boom! Cooper appears from the shadows and said something like, "That's not how you really think, ain't it Branch?". They were surprised he's there, and then they exchange some more dialouge sort of expressing Branch's concern about not fitting in with his hypothetical tribe out there, and shed some light on Coopers concern as well about wanting to find you who you really, and even if you don't fit in atleast you know the truth now, that sort of stuff. IDK, I'm not great at writing angst, lol.

Anyway, after some convincing from Poppy, Branch relented and decides to accompany her (even if he denies it, he wants to know if his people is out there). Cooper also wants to come along, and while Branch refuses for his own safety, Poppy allows it in the condition that he sticks with them at all times. So, the three sets of to explore the entire Troll Kingdom, to "reunite" all the tribes and make one big party at Queen Barb's World Tour.

Little did they know just what kinds of trouble they'll encounter on their journey.

Woah, plot twist, Cooper actually comes along instead of going on a solo journey this time around! He replaces Biggie in this! What a shocker! Shocked emoji!

Admitedly, while it's funny the first time, Cooper's solo adventure is... I don't wanna be too rude about it, but it's sort of unnecessary in the big run? I mean, not entirely unnecessary, but like, if you remove that and just have him go along with Poppy and co., nothing major would change. He'd still be reunited with his family in Vibe City, except this time he'll have a first time reaction to the history of the Strings and see the truth of it, y'know what I mean?

But anyway, Poppy, Branch and Cooper's gonna explore the world of other genres. I don't think much will change with his inclusion, but the reactions will be far more varied, me thinks. Stay tuned for the next part, 'cause wow did not expect this part of the series to be so convoluted lol.

Also I had wanted to include some scene redraws from the movie with new implemented elements for this AU, but artblock is gripping me tight and college is starting soon, so I won't have much time to draw than I do write. So, yeah, hope y'all don't mind lol. I'll definitely do some artwork for this AU in the future though, believe it!

Until next time!

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hyolks · 1 month

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GREETINGS!!! I just read through the wasteland doc and hough. . . it's really really awesome. Do you mind if I share some ideas? (rhetorical. you don't have much of a choice)

Okay, so about some of the toxic sludge stuff; what if it and the alchemist stone are related somehow/derived of the same stuff? Maybe the sludge is like. really temperamental to being handled but if handled PROPERLY it has some. WILD effect. and maybe that's one of the reasons they were testing it on the ishvalen people; to test out what lengths they could go with it? Perhaps through this experimentation they figured out. Wait. What the fuck? This stone thing that we just derived from this sludge and like. these people(idk. maybe it reacts with a blood/sludge ration that is like. super high in human blood but still need s a lot of sludge and thats why they need so many people to make it(or, another idea. maybe using some of the sludge in like. a single humans blood or something and it'll react with a human being as its environment. and make a minimal amount of like. basically the philosophers stone and they need to harvest a LOT but humans don't make much and get killed through it. idk)) but like.using these people and this sludge will make these stones that are SOOO powerful? Also maybe. The reason they raided ishval is because they historically were the main people who had the sludge and had like. writings and stuff making use of the sludge(in minimal amounts. maybe it's also like a religious piece?) and like. idk. And maybe also!! The way the sludge is mass processed/produced/whatever makes it toxic if not done correctly and needs like. special treatment in small batches to make it OK. anyways. Also IDK if you have stuff on Hohenheim yet . . .But I think it would be cool if he was like. One of the people to discover the sludge? Maybe you can keep him super old because he was the group to discover the sludge + with the properties the sludge can have, it kept him from aging or something(IDK if this would really fit the vibe all that well so. shrugs). maybe hohenheim had a twin brother(or childhood bestfriend even. they would probably have to be close) that acts as the homonculus/father? and they found the sludge together. but what hohenheim had regretted his brother indulged and basically did the whole. capitalize indutrial whatever thing to it. And hohenheim wants to stop that. The homonculus works from the shadows and maybe had like the sins working under him as a shadow thing for. whatever evil capitalism reasons. yeah. OH WAIT OTHER IDEA I HAD FOR HOHENHEIM that MIGHT be able to fit into the same thing with the sludge. Maybe he was a former outlaw that wanted to settle down? But he found it too risky to put Ed and Trish and Al in the way so he left. Maybe he became an outlaw because of the Homonculus wanting to et him out of the picture because they didn't share views(or maybe he tried to take him down spesifically and failed which turned him into an outlaw and the homonuculus decided he was to dangerous to be kept around and started to hunt him)? So he turned him into an outlaw. And kept an ear out for him and when Hohenheim knew they were close and there were chances of him being caught. He left. IDK. ALSO. I know you mentioned in the Doc that Al being in so much pain all the time from the sludge stuff eating away at him and how it's a major source of angst/guilt for Ed. But because I am a sucker for Al not being able to feel anything what if he like. Got his nerves to be 'paralyzed' or something? To the point where be can't really like. feel anything. It's a trade off; he either feels so much pain or nothing at all. Maybe it eats away at Ed because like. He put him into a position where he either feels a shit ton of pain all the time or he feels nothing and that's not fair. Anyways. I'm pretty sure I had more to write but I can't remember. So I might come back later if you'll allow it. these are all just suggestions btw. you don't have to listen to anything I say and tweak anything that you see fit. also ssorry if this is like. a jumble of nonsense. articulating can be hard BTW I absolutely ADORE your art. It's literally so swag. like the way you color and do clothes. . . SO scrummy. I hope your day is nice :))

OUUUUUUUHHHHHHHHHHHHHH OUUUH I LOVE THIS I SUPER SUPER LOVE THE HOHENHEIM BEING AN OUTLAW THAT WANTS TO SETTLE BUT ULTIMATELY LEAVES TO KEEP TRISHA ED AND AL SAFE... shakes my fist at hoheinheim. if he knew/helped with all of the research before hand and then went rouge.... everyone and their mom in the government body would be hunting down his ass

you actually got pretty close from the shite i was thinkin for the sludge too?? like the uhhhh its super temperamental but is an incredible material when handled correctly??? like the reason the train cart full of it is on their property when theyre young is bc it was being transported cross country to central... for "science"... and it derails for some reason. explosion. and the longer it sits out in the country side the more it like... drains the environment. hence it being an Awful substance unless in a controlled environment and used properly. it being native to ishval would also lend to why it would literally be so invasive to resembool but hmmmmm... evil substances...

I was also thinking. ohhh what would the homunculus be. they. they could BE made out of it. or are just humans that are infected/injected with it like how king bradley is with the philosophers stone but instead of it just being bradley its all of them. also bc i like thinking of what their backstories could be. thinkin about lust in a saloon dress has me weak in the knees

BUT THIS KINDA BRINGS UP WHAT I hinted at somewhere in some tags but like. i was thinkin about . uhhhmm . the mold from re7/8. which after looking briefly through a google search bc ive got some silly idea of it in my head is described as a superorganism that is also literally just mold. it has some kind of consciousness to it, like memory. idk if it has empathy or emotions though.... either way it was used to create eveline, who does have some kind of empathy and emotions, and she can both control it and use its consciousness network ??? sorry i literally cannot think of any proper way to describe this atm but. i was like. oh THIS could be what the homunculus are. they could be like eveline to the mold network.

and ethan gets infected with the mold and bc of that he's able to stick his limbs back on with some goddamn peroxide and literally survive fatal wounds... i was like... ohhhhh what if..... what if at some point.................... ed gets infected by the sludge (perhaps unknowingly).... and sees the homunculus regrow their limbs (idk if mold would do that in resident evil games but this is now in my hands).... and hes like..... oh my god. Oh my god. We. We can get it back. We can get our bodies back.

BUT IF. IF the sludge has the same consciousness network bullshit that the mold does in RE... alongside the hallucinations n stuff... it could literally eating away at ed's sanity and al is like uhm the fuck not we are not fucking doing that . we're getting goddamn vaccinated. but the allure of having a body back...

I KNOW I SO AGREE al not being able to perceive feelings while being in the armor is soooo chefs kiss and RELEARNING how to be human again is even LARGER CHEFS KISS. but youre so right. it was 100% like that so it can be angst for ed. you mentioning this reminded me of a fic i read where ed smokes opium for pain relief and i was like oh what if al did that? since he's essentially a giant walking open wound? but idk... it would wean into drug abuse bc how could it NOT with the sheer amount of pain he would be in. i might think on it a little more but substance abuse is a topic I'm not super familiar with yet so.....

I HADNT EVEN THOUGHT ABOUT FATHER,, ohhhh you are one helluva thing to tackle my good friend. this is going on the back burner.

you are always welcome to say more!! i love listening. I'm literally kickin my feet and giggling reading messages like these. u have brilliant things to say love

#SORRY I TOOK SO LONG TO RESPOND I WANTED TO GIVE THIS MY FULL ATTENTION AND-- I --- I FORGOT IT WAS SITTING IN MY INBOX (IS HIT BY CAR)#long post #askbox #shakes your hand. articulation is so hard.#anyways this was an absolute blast to see in my inbox i am kissing you all over your face #wastelands au

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