#ap got me mad stressed

[xxxdegenerate]

You're in need of something to write?!

I HAVE SOMETHING (if you want, that is)

Luffy. Ok? Luffy with an female reader who is nothing but kind, funny, gentle and an absolute sweetheart, like, she shares her food with him, joins in on play, is there for everyone, helping stuff-you get the Deal.

Everyone believes she can't get mad. Like they never seen her mad. That is until the Marines makes fun of her weak friends or laugh at them she can AND WILL take down an entire fleet of Marines, no matter how strong 🤣

HOLY SHIT okay bet 🥴 this will be interesting

Luffy X Reader

❥note ;; its late! but i really wanted to do this!

❥tw ;; reader will go ape shit, fighting, cursing. // not proofread

You were the nicest out of the straw hats. The kindest soul, never did anything to piss off anyone. You didn’t necessarily like to fight, but if it was needed it was needed.

You took care of everyone. Nami always joked about how you’re the ‘mother’ of the group. You were there to help in the kitchen with Sanji, or even Chopper on the clinic. You watered Nami’s tangerines whenever she was stressed about the other straw hats. Or running around with Usopp and his weird inventions. You get gist.

Although, particularly with Luffy. You were extra soft and patient. He was crazy in your eyes, but that didn’t stop him from melting your heart. You shared food with him, just to see his eyes light up and the corner of his mouth to turn upwards. Even when Sanji told him to stop sneaking food, you would secretly take some and give it to him later that day.

No one wanted to ever harm you, knowing if Luffy was pissed it would be the end for them. You went along with his shenanigans, being there for him whenever you could. Even though he didn’t show it often, he could get stressed. But a nice nap on the side of the boat in the sun together always fixed it!

Now, being BEYOND nice had its perks. But what if you snapped?

It was a warm day on the sunny. Everyone sat around in peaceful silence; despite Usopp, chopper, and Luffy running around. And Nami yelling at them to be quiet. It was peaceful.

Before a marine ship decided to pop up and ruin that.

You were in the middle of it all. Having a heated yelling battle with the marine captain was not fun. You were started to get heated at all of the insults that were said. And you don’t know why.

“You need to calm down lady! All of your friends are pirates! And so are you! Just a bunch of lowlifes.” The captain yelled over at you.

“Why don’t you shut your mouth!” You were attempting to cross over towards the other ship. Not having any devil fruit or any particular qualities, it was rather difficult.

“Your captain is a loser! A fake! He won’t get anywhere!” Luffy, occupied with another member did not hear this. You fumed. The rest of the crew were struggling. Usopp was running out of ideas, and Chopper was hiding behind Zoro.

“My captain happens to be the best out there!” Using your hands to cup over your mouth and shout back. Tears welting up in your eyes. You were frustrated.

“Wahh wahh little girl! That’s why he can’t even beat my strongest member! The whole crew is. nothing but weak!“ Noticing Luffy, who was just laughing and having fun, had no affect to this. So why did you care so damn much?

“What’s it to you? You don’t know any of us!” You glared at the man across from you, you wanted to just wipe that smug smirk off of his lips.

“Why don’t you come over here and do something about it?” Your heart was pumping. You climbed the ropes and landed on the opposite ship. “Y/n! Watch out!”

Luffy had called out to you. You whip your head around and see him toppled over by a marine guard. Oof that’s got to hurt.

You knew he was capable of taking care of himself so you turn back. You had someone to deal with.

You begin to trek towards the captain who held up his hands in a fighting position. Suddenly another marine came over and interrupted your fight. You bellowed. “Get off of me prick!” You punched the guy and he went skidding across the ship.

“So feisty. Are you mad I’m bullying your crew? Your weak weak friends.” You turned towards the guy. He was laughing. Oh how you wanted to slam his face into the floorboards. You run at him with all of your might. He dodged. “Ooiii! Y/n!” You heard from above.

You look up and see Luffy fly past you and into a wall. “See he can’t even do anything right.” The marine captain laughed in your face.

You snapped.

Something inside of you broke. Maybe it was from being nice all of the time, but you had so much hate in you. Your chest burned with rage. You ran at the captain, throwing the various marines that ran at you, overboard.

The other crew members watched in awe. They have never seen you this angry. Nor have they seen you ever really fight this hard. You caused explosions! Throwing whatever was in your way.

“Don’t. Say. That. About. Luffy.” You punched the captain repeatedly in the face. “Y/n!” A giggly voice said, pulling you out of the rage that consumed you.

“Luffy?” He smiled and waved at you. Distracting you.

The captain had picked you up and threw you overboard. You closed your eyes and braced for impact when you were suddenly pulled the opposite way.

“AHHH!”

You opened your eyes and noticed you were pulled against Luffys chest. He smiled widely at you as the two of you swung back towards your own ship. You wrapped your arms around him. “Luffy! I’m not finished!” You huffed. Trying to get out of his grip, not caring if you fall again.

He said nothing as you held on. He knew you were mad, he heard what was said, but didn’t think much of it, or why you even got so mad. “Luffy! Let me at that bitch of a man!!” Despite your protests he held on tight before setting you down next to Zoro, and going back to beat the rest up.

After the fight, you were still mad. You sat in the clinic in silence. Chopper took notice of this and decided to question. “You were very reckless out there today Y/n.” He started wrapping a bandage around your arm.

“Yeah.” You said coldly before softening after seeing Choppers face. “I just don’t want you guys to get hurt..or for people to say mean things..” Chopper hugged you tightly.

The door creaks open and Luffy walked in. Chopper excuses himself out seeing Luffys serious expression. Sitting next to you on the bed the two of you sat in silence before he suddenly embraced you. “Luffy?” Your face lit up with shock. “Are you okay? Are you hurt?” You tried to look at him to inspect.

He grabs your shoulders, holding you still and looks into your eyes. You were scared, he never was this serious. He looked worried..?

“Luffy..?”

“Don’t. Don’t ever do that again. Don’t ever get hurt again.” Luffy didn’t know the feeling in his chest he felt earlier on. When he brought you towards Zoro. His whole chest pounded in a anxious fear. After speaking to Nami about it, he came to you right away.

“Please.”

You hugged him once again, wrapping your arms around his waist and shoving your face in his chest. “You need to be careful too. You may be super strong, but but you can still get hurt!” You scolded. “You can’t just make me worry! Everyone calls you weak and i don’t like that because you aren’t!”

He laughs, breaking you out of your rant. His smile is back. “I promise!” You knew he meant it. But you also knew that he wouldn’t be at the same time. He was reckless. That’s who he was. He would protect everyone. Including you.

#luffy #luffy x reader #straw hats #one piece #one piece fluff #one piece scenario #one piece headcanons

[whitemonsterenjoyer]

Stupid stupid rant about my friend

TLDR: Friends are disappointing! I should just isolate myself and focus on ⭐ving instead!!!

honestly kind of fucking hate my friend right now. he gets pissed off over the smallest fucking shif and he never fucking says anything. he like hates communication. its gotten to a point where i dont want to play games with him and our other friends because he just gets annoyed and yells at us. i always feel like im doing something wrong! im so uncomfortable all the time! and then they get confused and upset when i dont feel like playing again. buddy, how can i fucking enjoy anything when youre making me feel uncomfortable at best the whole time????

he reminds me of my ex so much its awful. i cant stand him sometimes. if you dont respond the right way or at all hes say some shit like "i should just die" or "you guys hate me" and i just! hate it! and he refuses to communicate ANYTHING. hed rather give you the silent treatment IN THE FUCKING VOICE CHAT. you ask him a question qnd youll have to keep repeating it for like ten minutes before hell answer because he got mildly upset. he got snippy with us because we didnt have the game open the moment he joined the call. he got fucking mad at us for mentioning school while were on break. like???? im fucking sorry that we briefly mentioned something thats been a part of our daily lives for the last like 12 years? and we barely even actually talked about school. i just got upset that ill have to sit with the annoying kids in my first period, and our other friend said that her voicemail was full of colleges doing college shit. not only that, its just really fucking dumb that hes upset over talking about school during break. its literally fucking ending, you cant not think about it. and does he think that hes the only one stressed over school?? one friend doesnt even have freetime during the week a majority of the time because shes doing so much school shit. i almost committed in freshman year! and even now, i need hours after school every day to decompress because im so fucking overstimulated and overwhelmed all day! and the third other person is taking FIVE AP CLASSES. their ass is swamped with work too!!! meanwhile, he can get home and have the time and energy to draw and play video games and record and edit videos all in the same day. if snything he doesn't get to say anything about not wanting to think about school while relaxing bc hes the most relaxed!

i asked him why he didnt tell us smtg would upsst him before we did it and he just responded with "i assumed you guys were cool." ok.

i mentioned that i had stolen sone of my parents alc while i was doing online school. yknow that period of time where i was struggling with dissociation and thoughts of committing? and nobody was fucking talking to me? he said that made me a bad person.

our friend has a girlfriend and naturally they spend a lot of time together. he gets upset seeing that theyre playing the same game or knowing that theyre hanging out without us. i dobt mind, i just wished shed let us know that she had plans rather than leaving out of nowhere. but he genuinely like despises her for spending time with her significant other.

ive stopped making plans with him because he kept flaking. he was always so indecisive and he would cancel plans the night before so often. sometimes even the MORNING OF. he would want to save money even if he wouldve spent a total of 10 dollars, or hed be too tired bc he refused to stop playing games the night before. i always go to bed earlier if im doing something the next day. i dont know why im not worth the same energy. honestly im not sure he actually likes hanging out with me, im just the only one willing to do the same things as him. the only plans that worked out were things he was absolutely going to do regardless of anyone going with him.

i dont wven know how to breach the subject with him because, again, hes so much like my ex. i know that if i make him feel bad, hell either get defensive or just freak out and cry about it. i listened to my ex say id be better off if he was gone in response to me venting way too many times to want to express my feelings about people ever again.

and it really sucks bc other times hes really nice and fun to be around. i just wonder if he dies actually like me at all. i feel like he sees me as less than sometimes.

idk i stopped being mad and got sad.

but i mean hes implied it before. he wants more friends to play cod and fortnite with and go to the park at night with. he never asks me to do thise things. im willing to play fortnite. i want to play cod. i want to do literally anything at night especially go to the park. he especially wanted more guy friends to do things with.

hed be happier being friends with the kids at school who hate me

idk. this is dumb. its 3am.

[captainsjack]

📓 I haven’t gotten to your most recently posted fics yet, but I can’t wait to have the time!! Always get excited when you post!

ahh tysm!! lowkey i wrote those new ones an entire year ago and never posted them until now😳

i'm currently fixated on other stuff rn (if u couldnt tell lol) so idk when/if i'll write for shawngus again!? that said i have SO MANY wips for them that i never got around to dfkjfdjkfdkj i was looking through all of them to see which one to tell you about and?? lowkey i found the first fic i ever came up with for them and it kinda still slaps! i literally remember writing it during my ap psych class senior year of high school lmaooo

anyways so basically gus is about to get married to rachel and shawn's helping him get ready and it's like 5 mins before the wedding when shawn's like "gus don't get married." and gus is all "wtf shawn" and then shawn ends up telling gus he's in love with him and should be marrying him. and gus gets mad bc this is so stressful and why is shawn telling him now of all things, he has a wedding to get to goddamnit! and then its the wedding via gus pov and his reflection on his relationship with shawn and stuff. and he doesn't know whether or not he's in love with shawn.

then it's the reception and shawn gives his best man speech except they're really just vows aren't they? and they're all about timing and how timing sucks n shawn can barely keep it together. and when he finishes he just like. leaves. and gus follows him and shawn's kinda having a breakdown in the bathroom and then they talk more about what shawn said and then gus kisses him. n then thoughts n feelings n shit u know? and then gus tells shawn he isn't not in love with him but also he doesn't know if he is, and it's all just too confusing. then shawn leave bc he can't stomach being at the wedding any longer but at least now he and gus are on good terms.

gus goes back to the wedding reception n u know is conflicted and all that good shit.

then shawn's at the office and he gets shot. then henry's there bc he had followed him when he saw gus go back inside alone (he kinda knew what was going on before the wedding)

so he calls vick and she tells gus & crew shawn's shot and on the way to the hospital.

so then gus feelings and realizations of love while waiting for shawn to come out of surgery, of course bc they deserve this trope ok?

and then when shawn's awake gus tells him he loves him and they kiss!! and gus stays in the hospital with him and takes care of him. and then he goes and talks to rachel and explains everything and they get divorced and shawn and gus live happily ever after the end

-

ask me about my wips!

#dsjdjfh lowkey i forgot how much of it i wrote back then and?? its kinda good? different style than i have now but literally not bad #i kinda like this one #thank u for asking!!! #psych #shus #shawngus #shawn x gus #shawn/gus #my writing #sort of #answered

[auxilioooo]

ok i just watched episode seven of moon girl season two and i started crying CUZ GOD DAMN YOU DIDNT HAVE TO ATTACK ME LIKE THAT

SPOILERS AHEAD

I’ve suffered from bad anxiety since i was a kid. i’ve always been scared to talk to kids my age and i’ve always felt i needed to be perfect in school. I’m the kid who if they get a B they start freaking out. Then in 7th grade when i was already struggling with 7th Accelerated Math COVID hit and I had to do everything online. My middle school didn’t handle it well and i was so scared of failing and the fact that i couldn’t talk to my teacher about not understanding the work that I just didn’t do any of it (counter productive i know). I ended up with a ton of zeros and my mom got mad. I ended up fixing it but that didn’t help my anxiety at all.

In high school (grades 9-12 for non-americans) all the pressure got worse and everything was a lot more stressful. 9th grade I was the only freshman in my math class and I had a horrible english teacher, 10th I was in my yearbook class (that’s an entire shit show of its own that, to summarize, made me super depressed and the reason i’m in therapy) and now Im in AP Physics. The test are super hard and stressful especially when i don’t understand most of it. I also was taking 3 other AP classes and i had to drop one. Because of that my anxiety got so bad that i started taking medication which has been super helpful and made school a lot more bearable.

Anyways when Lunella started talking about how she needs to be perfect and have all this pressure put on her by Dr. Ojo, I really related to all of that. Plus the visuals of representing it is exactly what i think and how it feels when i get those waves of anxiety. The part that made me start crying is when Mimi and Casey check on Lunella and Casey ask what’s happening and Mimi just goes “she’s having a panic attack”. Just hearing those words come out of the screen just meant so much to me. Just thinking of all the little girls, even then the little kids, who have felt the same and watching this showing that even some of the most powerful people have felt the same way. To show people what goes on to the “smart kids” when the expectations finally catch up with them and are told “you’re not good enough you need to be better”. To show that it’s normal to feel these feelings and also to show how to handle it. Making sure you have a good support group and even listening to music that calms you down (Here Comes a Thought from Steven Universe helps me). I’m just so happy to watch a show and just think “i’m not the only one. it’s ok that i feel this way”.

Anyways sorry for my ramble and GO WATCH MOON GIRL AND DEVIL DINOSAUR SEASON TWO BABY!!!!

#marvel #anxiety #panic attack #disney tva #moon girl and devil dinosaur #moon girl #lunella lafayette #moon girl magic #moongirl lunella #casey calderon #mimi #mimi moongirl #devil #devil dinosaur #moon girl stop personally attacking me #sorry for my rant

[fairygodpiggy]

As winter's wilds send us fleeing for shelter,

My thoughts turn toward the kiss of Costa's sun.

I think of Westerly winds and sandy shores,

And I know that, soon, the dawn will come.

Ride again, early June.

Q: What is this??

A: Well, this is the first time I've been back on tumblr while this event has been held!

This is a teaser promo for Ride the Tide 2024!

Q: What is Ride the Tide?

A: RTT is a virtual summer/beach festival that is put on in XIV in Costa del Sol. It's planned, sponsored, and held by a XIV discord community I helped to found, The Aetheryte Plaza.

We gather RP venues from all over the NA data centers and together, we run various booths for games, refreshments, and hangouts - including a main stage where well known bards will play to get you into the festival mood!

We try to hold it well out of range of the game's official Moonfire Faire, but before Pride events really start kicking off so we don't detract from them.

This will be Aetheryte Plaza's 5th year hosting the festival, and my 4th year helping with its planning!

Q: What caused AP to start hosting a summer festival?

A: The festival was first conceived by a couple of good friends of mine in 2020, just after shutdowns really started happening. And since vacation plans were out the window for a lot of people, they decided to create a virtual festival...and it was a WILD success.

I was only attending as a venue worker for one of the booths, but I got to see it all at the forefront:

We hit the zone cap!

We got the S rank to spawn in the middle of it!

We had mentors mad at us because they couldn't get their little sprouts through Titan, meanwhile said sprouts were running around with stars in their eyes because it was a FESTIVAL and this was the most players they'd seen outside of the main cities!!

People were posting all their screenshots of their WoLs hanging out together!

It was so cool to see how many people came because...in the middle of the pandemic when we couldn't physically leave, we all needed this.

Q: Is this strictly an RP event?

A: Well...the short answer is no, it's RP-lite.

The long answer is: originally it was going to be during its 1st year, but because of its nature, we got a mixed bag of RPers, casual players, streamers, and people who were just there to vibe...so RP kinda got tossed to the side unless we encountered fellow RPers.

If you're an RPer and you want to RP with the people working the booths, go for it!! They'll happily RP with those who want to.

Q: What's your role in planning?

A: If you've come this far, dear reader, I thank you because if you came here because of the image at the top of this post...then you have half of your answer!

I'm in charge of the media aspect - making teasers and posters, etc ❤️

I'm also in charge of the RTT website and the festival's interactive map. That was my addition when I joined the planning team in 2021. No more need to guess where booths are and what they offer!

However, this...is going to be my last year being on the planning team only because I stress myself way out in the late phases of the event planning, and my best friends are putting their feet down 😅

Thank you again if you read through all of this. If this has piqued anyone's interest, then keep up with me! I'll be including tumblr this year as I share RTT posters in a few months!

#eyri #ffxiv #ride the tide #rtt #I'll be helping to judge the glamour contests as well this year! #roegadame #femroe #ffxiv screenshots #gposers #ff14 gpose #ffxiv gpose #roegadyn #my wol

[non-binary-laurie-strode]

Reflections on my Universal Horror marathon

It is November 1st, 2023. As anyone can tell after being around me for, I don't know, five minutes, I am a huge horror queen. For my birthday this year, I got a big book on Universal horror, filled with production photos, background, trivia, actor bios, etc. I decided to use this book as a sort of guided reading list, where I would marathon all of the movies discussed in the book and read along. When I was first seriously doing a deep dive into horror in 2018, the classic 30s horror franchises were some of the first that I chose to get into, and so it had been five years or so since I had seen some of my old monster friends. (And many of the movies on this list I had not seen before!) I was excited for this project and decided to start it at 99 days until Halloween; I had found a Sam (1) "Countdown to Halloween" clock that counted from 99 days to 0 days last year, at the Spirit Halloween clearence sale. (2) So, 99 days to do a book's worth of movies—how hard could it be?

(1) from Trick r Treat, 2007

(2) He's currently sitting on my bedside table, at 0 days left!

Turns out, it was rather difficult! I hadn't expected the book to have so many entries in it.

The entire list of films that I did is as follows, broken down by chapter:

Silent Era (5 films): The Hunchback of Notre Dame 1923, The Phantom of the Opera 1925, The Phantom of the Opera 1943, The Cat and the Canary 1927, The Man Who Laughs 1928

Dracula (5 films): Dracula 1931, Drácula 1931, Dracula's Daughter 1936, Son of Dracula 1943, House of Dracula 1945

Frankenstein (4): Frankenstein 1931, Bride of Frankenstein 1935, Son of Frankenstein 1939, Ghost of Frankenstein 1942

The Wolf Man (5): Werewolf of London 1935, The Wolf Man 1941, Frankenstein Meets The Wolf Man 1943, House of Frankenstein 1944, She-Wolf of London 1946

The Mummy (5): The Mummy, The Mummy's Hand, The Mummy's Tomb, The Mummy's Ghost, The Mummy's Curse

The Invisible Man (5): The Invisible Man 1933, The Invisible Man Returns 1940, The Invisible Woman 1941, Invisible Agent 1942, The Invisible Man's Revenge 1944

The Gill Man (3): Creature From the Black Lagoon 1954, Revenge of the Creature 1955, The Creature Walks Among Us 1955

"Universal's Lesser Known Monsters" (3+3+6): Paula the Ape Woman—Captive Wild Woman 1943, Jungle Woman 1944, The Jungle Captive 1945; The Creeper—Pearl of Death 1944, House of Horrors 1946, The Brute Man 1946; The Inner Sanctum Mystery Series—Calling Dr Death 1943, Weird Woman 1944, Dead Man's Eyes 1944, The Frozen Ghost 1944, Strange Confession 1945, Pillow of Death 1945

Non-serial horror (14): The Old Dark House 1932, Murders in the Rue Morgue 1932, The Black Cat 1934, The Raven 1935, Black Friday 1940, Man-Made Monster 1941, Horror Island 1941, Night Monster 1942, The Mad Ghoul 1943, The Strange Door 1951, The Black Castle 1952, Tarantula 1955, The Mole People 1956, Monster on the Campus 1958

That's 68 movies in 99 days by my reckoning. I also only did these on the nights that Mack worked or was dancing, which further tightened the number of days that I had. Good thing they were each about 60 minutes. I could never do this in the modern era where everyone bloats their movies to an absurd degree.

See, I thought it would be something small, with like... 30 movies in 99 days. I didn't expect all of this! Maybe I should have checked how many movies that would be before solidly deciding to do this challenge, eh? And it's not even allll of the Universal horror movies—Lugosi and Karloff did like six "duet" movies like The Raven and The Black Cat, but the book only focused on two and briefly name-dropped the others. By the mid-October, when I was in the final chapter, I was doing two or three movies per night, and it was quite a stressful thing, not knowing how I'd get it all to line up before Mack took his Halloweek vacation!

But I did it. I'm extremely proud that I stuck to it. And also, I will absolutely not do it again! Perhaps in another five years I'll have a craving for the Universal horror movies again, and I'll do my favourite 30 or so, but this insanity will not be repeated, or at least not with this time scale.

Anyway. Here are some things I wish to talk about:

Appreciating Silent Film

The silent era has always been one that I've wanted to get into, but I've never known how exactly to break into it. I've done a few silent movies before—if you're looking for a rec, Häxan from 1923 is a very disturbing and deeply effective look at medieval witchcraft—but I never felt like I had a sure footing in it.

And, well, the book starts at 1923 with Hunchback, no easing into it. And, turns out, it was mostly fine!

The 1925 Phantom was stunning. I love the tinted vibes of the silent era, and this film had a rare Technicolor sequence during the Masquerade bit where all the costumes were in colour, and it was amazing to see. There's a 19...29, I think?, scored version, which is what I watched, and the score pops off.

The 1927 Cat and the Canary ended up as one of my favourites of the whole marathon—there's no scoring option for this, but it's so fun I didn't care. The story revolves around a will reading on a dark and stormy night, a will reading, and a sudden heiress who has to prove her sanity as a condition of the will, all while an antagonistic family and a killer are loose in the mansion. It's a horror-comedy, and it is such a good time. I had rated it 5/5 on letterboxd years ago, but I had forgotten why, and I quickly rediscovered the reason!

So yeah, I got a couple silents to add to my résumé, next to stuff like Häxan and the typical Dr Caligari.

2. The Evolution of What Horror Is

One of my favourite things to think about and consider is what society's horror fixation is in a given era and how it all ties together in a sort of greater historiography.

This marathon covers the 20s through the late 50s, with most of it happening in the 30s and 40s. There's a pretty clear chain of where the focus goes in these—in the 20s, it's a lot of classic adaptations that have a gruesome element but which may not be yknow categorical Genre Horror as we recognise it and label it on a dvd box. The 30s explore the more typical folk myths and superstitions, such as vampires and werewolves; if there is science, it is either rather crude or primitive (Frankenstein using lightning bolts and sewing pieces of body together) or even has a mystical connection (Werewolf of London's Tibetan miracle flower—often this mysticism can unfortunately veer into Orientalist tropes :/). The 40s, and particularly around 1945 with the atomic bomb, the old superstitions lose steam and modern science begins to catch up, to the point that the 50s horror movies are, essentially, all a world away in terms of science—I mean, they try behavioural therapy on the Creature from the Black Lagoon in Revenge of the Creature! The later "Monster Mash" movies where all of the classic monsters join up have them turning to modern science to solve their problems—I believe it's in House of Dracula where the Wolf Man is legitimately ""cured"" by a cranial surgery based on some science, and Dracula gets cured by looking at the particulates in his blood and stuff. Anyway, continuing in the 50s, There's all this talk of atoms and radiation and such, and it's such a strong blend of science fiction and horror, such that the two genres are practically constant bedmates for this era. (Contrary to a popular tumblr post comparing Godzilla to 50s superhero comics, radiation actually did inspire a lot of monsters in America too; you just needed to know where to look, and it's here, in the giant Creature Features, where Godzilla would fit right in.)

I remember shortly after House of Dracula, I was talking to Mack, and I essentially launched into a ten minute lecture about this stuff, how it all ties into what was happening in society and whatnot. I have so much to say, but I won't word vomit it here.

3. These Movies Said, Continuity WHO?

One of the recurrent jokes I had while watching these movies is that the writers were clearly not interested in keeping continuity between films. There are two instances that I internally screamed at because of how insane they were—(1) In House of Frankenstein, Dracula is destroyed in the sunlight, The Wolf Man is shot by a silver bullet and dies, and the Frankenstein creature sinks into quicksand and disappears. Most of the plot of House of Frankenstein is quickly retold by the mad scientist character of House of Dracula; he leaves out the Wolf Man's death, probably because it would upset the Wolf Man, to whom he is speaking. Dracula is also back without explanation. (2) The Mummy's Ghost is set in Connecticut; they are very emphatic that they are in Connecticut. It is said over and over. At the end, the Mummy is chased into the swamp of Connecticut (yknow, the famous swamps of Connecticut) —at the very beginning of The Mummy's Curse, they point to a stretch of swampland, say that THIS is where Kharis sank all those years ago (it was 6 months in real time btw), and that he should still be there. This movie is set in the bayou of Louisiana, with a cheerful barkeep woman singing in French to evoke the whole "Cajun French" world. How Kharis went from Connecticut to "this is the exact spot where he fell" in Louisiana? Never mentioned.

Additionally, in one of the later Frankensteins, Ygor has his brain transplanted into the Frankenstein Monster in a scheme; Ygor-Frankenstein Monster triumphantly turns to the assembled characters and speaks to them, telling them how he tricked them and won. In the next movie, which I believe is Meets The Wolf Man, the Frankenstein Monster is a mute brute once more, and Ygor does not exist anymore. Now, the wildest thing is that this is not the writers cherrypicking what is canon and what is not—no, in the script the Frankenstein Monster-Ygor was to have deep conversations with the Wolf Man, and this was recorded. It was only in post-production that all of this was struck; all those scenes were either tossed or edited down. Apparently there are visuals of those scenes in the movie where you can watch the FM's mouth move, but the audio has been replaced with music or sound effects. Wild stuff.

There's more, plenty more, but you get the picture. I suppose in a world without home video, where your audience may not have seen the previous films or may not remember them well, you can convince them of anything and continuity matters less.

4. Some of these movies destroyed my will to go on (with the marathon)

Overall, I greatly enjoyed my time with this marathon. I found most of these movies to be very interesting and illuminating.

But there are two series in this that just crushed my spirit—The Mummy and Paula the Ape Woman. They were so awful that it made me not want to keep going.

The Mummy is just such a confused mess; the worst time I had was with The Mummy's Tomb. Tomb is the third movie in the series, so of course there's some catch-up that has to be done to get the audience up to speed. (They all do it, it's normal.) Now, this is a 60 minute movie. Tomb begins with a TWELVE MINUTE "recap" of the first two movies, using a flashback to show scenes from the old movies—all the while narrating them to construct a new story of what supposedly happened and wildly making up new stuff that directly contradicts what is visible on screen. TWELVE MINUTES out of SIXTY, one fifth of the movie, is just incredibly out of context scenes to do whatever the writers want.

And that's not even getting into the cultural sensitivity discussions around these movies, because girl........... girl. It's rough on that front, to say the least. (They reuse an Incan temple, if I remember right, as an Egyptian tomb in the last one, I think it was, and you can clearly see Mesoamerican imagery all over the walls, but they're yelling about pharoahs and stuff. And that's the tip of the iceberg.)

Paula the Ape Woman is about an ape who gets a brain and blood transplant and becomes a real woman, or at least temporarily. Now, audience, given that this an early 40s movie... do you think this uncontrollable, animalistic beast of a woman is going to be white or no? :////

The Paula movies just need to be forgotten. Not every Universal horror movie is a lost gem in the sands of time. Let's just say that.

5. James Whale, Lon Chaney Jr, and thoughts on recurring names and faces

With the studio system firmly in place for most of this marathon's concerned eras, there are many repeating names throughout the movies. It became something of a scavenger hunt to find "Gowns by Vera West" in the title credits of most movies—according to letterboxd, I think I hit 37 movies with her credited on wardrobe.

Some of these repeating names I grew to really like. James Whale really is among the greats, isn't he? Bride of Frankenstein is nothing short of a masterpiece, and his other work (especially The Old Dark House) is great. I would love to do a deeper dive just into his other works. He seems so fascinating! And he was gay, and apparently very very open about it.

A name I came to dislike, unexpectedly really, was Lon Chaney Jr, most known for The Wolf Man. I went in with a higher opinion of him, only knowing him from The Wolf Man; he eventually became a bit of a golden boy on the Universal horror sets, and so he got into a ton of different projects. And boy, did he ever only play one character across everything! He's extremely good at it, but he only ever played a sad, pathetic little man who is overwhelmed by the weight of the world! We get it, dude. Play a different character!

6. Conclusions

This is getting away from me, so I'll wrap this up. Thank you if you even skimmed this far!

I really did enjoy this marathon. It was stressful, a little, but a fun stress, all things considered.

Rapidshot overall favs: The Bride of Frankenstein, the Cat and the Canary, Revenge of the Creature, Dracula, The Old Dark House, Tarantula, 1925's Phantom of the Opera, the Raven.

Rapid boots: The Mummy franchise, Paula the Ape Woman series, She-Wolf of London, the Black Cat, Ghost of Frankenstein.

I love this era of horror: It's almost a cosy horror to me, with giant fog machines, goofy big analog science contraptions, and painted backdrops (you can see the painted backdrops and their flatness during the early 30s ones especially). I like that there are fewer cuts compared to the modern day: They hold the camera on the actors, and often the camera is not on a close-up, giving plenty of time for interesting physicality. It almost feels staged or traditionally theatrical in a way that modern movies do not. (Which makes sense, as the earlier writers and directors and actors all came from and routinely did theatre. Lugosi got Dracula after he did the stage version of it.) Many of them are very comfortable feeling, and they're short too!

I don't think I could do another grand tour like this again for years, at mininum,—and I won't revisit Paula and probably not The Mummy—but I do want to revisit it more than I have in the last few years. These monsters are my FRIENDS!

Anyway. Stan Boris Karloff, James Whale, and especially Elsa Lanchester

#my universal horror marathon #thank you to anyone who reads #i mostly just wanted to write this up for me

[minisculecosmos]

It’s never just wind, sunshine- sometimes it’s the lessons we learned along the way

A close meta analysis of episode 6 of KinnPorsche, as compared to nature, its symbols, and what it means for the future of the show.

We all know KinnPorsche the Series is far from your regular BL. No hate on any other shows, we all adore them I’m sure, but the effort put into the cinematography, staging, editing, symbolism, and more, has made this story one of actual substance, for people like us crazy meta people on tumblr to meta-post about.

I read this book back in my AP Literature class in high school, which at the time I vehemently disliked. However, I will be using a couple facets of the book to analyze episode 6 of KinnPorsche, namely– “It’s More Than Just Rain or Snow”, and a couple other chapters I, with many groans of my senior year self, would be yelling at me now for using in an affirmative matter. Sorry, me. But with an episode entirely in the wild, I have to talk about common nature symbols, and what they mean in the context of the show.

First off, I realize not everything is intentional and that some of this is just correlation. But that’s the joy of analysis– pointing out what the creators don’t realize they’re saying. And in that, finding meaning between the lines– or rather, scenes.

So the guards are looking for the wayward couple. Enter stage right, we see our darling main couple, emotions flared high, stuck together, and so far? Hating it. 

Whether it was simply due to the time of filming or on purpose, the environment around these two matches their emotions perfectly. Their emotions are turbulent. These two were forced together after a week of lack of real communication, on completely uneven footing. Any former balance of power they had no longer matters here– it is the wild, after all. The wind blowing powerfully through the trees is a representation of literal turbulence, their resentment and undiscussed feelings for each other gone unmentioned given a literal image. I thought it was quite fitting.

So they’re fighting, and eventually bam, they fall into water. An oasis, a source of renewal in the middle of their anger. Not that it’s not undeserved– I got so much joy from seeing Porsche finally get to rant to Kinn. He got to finally be mad. He needed that, absolutely. He, and the audience as an extension of Porsche, needed that catharsis, relief after an act of stress and so little relief. This episode is catharsis.

Still, they fall into the water. And instead of more yelling, they emerge from their little fall with smiles, in an embrace. It’s after they fall in that we see them hold hands for the first time this episode. 

Pulling another chapter title from the book here– “If She Comes Up, It’s Baptism”. The water they literally fall into is a mini baptism, a little breath of life into these two. They go in furious and upset, and come out restored and joyful. Yes, the water is something they desperately needed anyway from a purely physical standpoint, but looking at the scene from this viewpoint almost gives it a feeling of  holiness. And it’s deserved, after their pain, separation and consequent reunion. They’re starting to go under, but this time, together. 

Of course, their struggles are far from over. They’re fighting an uphill battle, getting better yet there’s still a giant chasm between them that demands to be crossed, but it’ll take effort to get there. And all this is set against a landscape of literal dust and heat, another embodiment of the characters’ own feelings and thoughts. 

Night falls. Things are put back into the dark, Porsche and Kinn are not yet together as they fall asleep for the first time. 

But the interrupting factor here? There’s a fire. A fire that symbolizes life, light, a lamp for them to be guided by. And it’s no random fire; they started the fire together. It’s no coincidence that with this fire, they wake up together, co-reliant, but content.

Then comes our beloved waterfall scene. The water is cold, unrelenting, powerful– and what happens while they’re standing against the current of the waterfall, the summation of all the forces against them? They kiss. 

Yes, it’s brief, but the attraction is there. Look at how Kinn places his hand on Porsche’s neck not once, but twice. Yes, Kinn pulled away, but they kissed, and it was consensual, a choice, and it means oh-so-much.

It’s a second little baptism, further reuniting these two. The first, they walked away holding hands. The second, they share their first sober kiss. And instead of this happening in a small pond, a calm puddle, their first oasis– it happens in a storm of water, frigid, unpleasant, but for the first time they choose each other. They choose to fight against whatever may come their way, together.

It’s a leap of faith for these two. A freefall, if you will. Oh– what’s that? They do free fall in this episode? Hang on, I gotta write about this.

“Now I’m ready to freefall” is a lyric that I’m sure is familiar to all of us. And I honestly believe it’s meant to represent this scene. Pulled together, hand in unlovable hand, they try to escape. Having heard the first sounds of what sounds like help, they try to run toward safety, yet away from freedom. And they fall, into what could literally be described as, between a rock and a hard place, but they do it together. 

Here, they face the heart-wrenching rock paper scissors issue. All humor and idiocy aside, this scene matters so much. It shows sacrifice from Porsche, something that has been built up since episode 1– a willingness to bend to Kinn. In a move the Porsche of episode 2 would never forgive himself for, Porsche volunteers to cut off his own hand in an immense display of humility, sacrifice, and most importantly, love. 

Their rock and hard place is this final decision, and this great forgiveness, an acknowledgment of their mistakes, and the willingness to move forward. They resolve this issue, and the handcuffs are unlocked. They are freed from the terrible bond symbolized by the handcuffs that held them together for the last few days, an imprisonment no longer true to them. They are freed. Instead, they are now bound by real, emotional, and true ties that will carry them out of the cave, out of the dark night into their new day. 

Or so we all wished.

Night falls once more, this time noticeably lacking any fire. There is no light, no life. This scene is designed to look sad, and it did its job. The shot is dark, bleak, there are sharp edges everywhere, even the scenery is unforgiving, a representation of their inescapable circumstance. The night here does not represent renewal, not in any good sense. 

Night now represents death, a conclusion, old age, a final season. To Kinn, that night was the end for him. In telling Porsche to leave, giving him a way out no matter the cost to himself. Making this decision broke him. It killed Kinn more than any bullet would– because to Kinn, Porsche was his ticket out, and in sacrificing his ability to be with Porsche, he thought he was surrendering any right he had left to any romantic love in the future. When Porsche left, both before and after the kiss, Kinn was likely thinking that he would be single forever; alone, hardened, jaded, and without his Porsche. 

It’s why when the bullet comes for Kinn, he is so ready to sacrifice himself for Porsche. I don’t think the move was so much love oriented, to protect his current lover, because while the two are now somewhat at that stage, Kinn here is only thinking of all that Porsche is. Porsche, who still has a chance at being good, that Kinn believes he could never have or be, ever. Kinn goes down, still protecting Porsche with his body, having surrendered to the other, just as the other had surrendered to him. 

This episode embodies the spirit of any classical writing, in my opinion. There’s lessons here, symbolism, and it marks the end of the first true arc in KinnPorsche.

I think after this, we’ll see Porsche having truly accepted his role as bodyguard, and his standing with Kinn officially altered. Yes, there will be resentment because he too sacrificed his freedom, with choosing Kinn in the end, but he knows more now. Yes, it won’t be sunshine and daisies from here on out; they aren’t perfect yet. There’s still so much they have to learn and understand about each other before they can be the best mafia murder husbands. But still– they agreed on no more doubts. Not between them, anymore. 

I have this feeling it’ll come later in the series, but analytically, that trailer scene of Porsche meditating underwater (i.e. becoming the baddest-ass bodyguard out there), would fit so poetically perfectly in episode seven. But I guess we’ll see.

Anyway...

If you got this far, thank you so much for reading. I hope we can all feel just that much more emotionally deranged after this episode. For all the hurt and pain it gave us, it’s also incredibly comforting to watch play out.

While we wait for next week, please check out some similar posts from my dearest IMM friends:

Check out @LuckyDragon10 Nemi’s Lines of Power Series, and some KP fanfic. Or @antique-forvalaka with wonderful Color Theory Posts, and a fic here and various memes to keep us all entertained. @moerusai, our resident gif extraordinaire, and @fractured-ice, also with some incredible fic. Of course, shoutout to the other best mutuals ever, @chaoselmo with incredible costume analysis, and @biochemjess. 

Check out my blog @minisculecosmos for more posts like this: A Bit on Pete, and When Things Blur, and my own fic self-promo, of course.

Until the next. 

Go stream Jeff Satur.

#kinnporsche #my IMM mates #mini's meta #sorry this is a literal monster of a post #I had a lot to say okay #really putting those ap english scores of 5 to use here #pulling all the chops #no symbol left behind #kinnporsche meta #kinnporsche la forte #kinnporsche episode 6

[otomelavenderhaze]

All my thoughts on the honeymoon episode (17) of mclll with Rayan.

Get 👏 yourself 👏 a 👏 fictional 👏 man 👏 who 👏 would 👏 face 👏 a 👏 tiger 👏 for 👏 you 👏 then 👏 ruin 👏 his 👏 plans 👏 and 👏 save 👏 his 👏 ass 👏 instead 👏

That's it. That's the review. Y'all welcome. I know I know very insightful, you don't need to thank me for it.

But no, while the episode was fun, chaotic, full of replayability, some cute and hot moments, I have good and bad things to talk about it and I have a lot of thoughts about certain scenes that I cannot simply move on with my life without talking about them at least once.

So let's do this, maybe my last review ever about any mcl related episode.

I will always welcome an episode that makes me remember why I fell in love for the set up, for the story and for the character (Li) in the first place and that honeymoon episode was that. It was the most fun I ever had since, buff, I don't know, I think University Life? Because I wouldn't have called Love Life a funny haha ride all the way through and I cannot remember the last time was giddy with the game like I was today.

The episode was short, very much what I was expecting... and very much gave me a misplaced vibe, it didn't feel like the last episode the big farewell that the wedding episode felt like. It actually felt like a spin-off half cooked, it very much felt like just a travel, not really a honeymoon (not that I had much of those in real life but well) and it felt goofy which y'know, mcl is known for.

And I am talking about the cave conversation.

I would say that the episode would be fun for replayability if you have NO ISSUE in spending around 4.000 aps for it, if not then you go ahead and have a good ride like I did, but I will not pretend it's very rewarding or even mandatory. It's not.

You gonna take some giggles and get ONE moment in the episode that's really worth it.

For Rayan depending in which alternative you picked you could've: learnt more about Chloé's and Rayan's relationship and how he feels about her death now that he married Candy, about Rayan's father that he never EVER talked about before or a very cute moment when he talks about how he felt when he first met Candy and how he struggled with his feelings.

I am a sucker for any piece of new information I get about him, so I had a blast with it.

It was a JOY finding out that every alternative would give me a new whole dialogue to explore and read, it felt like a bonus and it was the best thing about the episode, besides the tiger moment.

Which was wild, see Rayan telling Candy in a firm voice that "she never heard before him using" to not move and help with all yelling at the tiger to scare it off was WILD, my nerd bookworm man went alpha mode on that tiger and it was HOT. Hot damn. It was hotter than any sex scene. Yes, Daddy, protect us, you go off king, you can punch a tiger for sure, BIG DICK ENERGY IF EVER SAW ONE.

But I will tell you, make Candy actually take away the tiger's attention towards Rayan and try to attract it alone was hella cool too, Candy was BRAVE, even though when he got mad at her after she cried of stress and fear and then he comforts her and calls her his hero, IT WAS A SUCH NICE MOMENT. One of the beauties of having a lot of aps, free time and grief towards a route that is gonna be replaced in the next months.

So good.

Let's talk about what I didn't like then.

I don't like how the ilus can only be obtain if you get all the right answers but the game gives you too little of information about which answers are right and which are wrongs, it was very punishing, I don't get it.

I don't like how the ilus was locked away behind a sex scene at the end of the episode, there was no special moment of their first night as a married couple, it was no different from any other generic sex scene - I will admit, it's a pretty ilus, but at this point, feels like the same of all the ones I already got, there was no sexy lighting, no extra gloss over it no care for what it would be THE LAST ILUS OF THE GAME.

Felt lazy, there I said it. The episode being so out of place from the whole trio of Proposal Episode, Getting married Episode and then the Honeymoon Episode is ODD and off putting, it feels wrong, it feels like they didn't plan that shit properly and if that's the case it doesn't surprise me cuz I have been getting this for MONTHS now.

THEY GAVE UP. The new game is more important now. Screw us I guess.

And screw them too honestly. I hope the new game gets a better treatment from the bottom of my heart, but I doubt it strongly after so many years and GAMES of this and of this lazy shit they do, so probably it won't be any better...... I wouldn't know, cuz I am not gonna play it.

Nice episode, despite it faults and everything else, I liked it.

#my candy love #amor doce #corazon de melon #amour sucre #Rayan my sweet king #thank you for everything #thank you the writers for giving me this amazing character to love and play his route #despite all the flaws I loved him deeply #and it hurts my heart greatly see his route being thanos snapped out of existence #but I guess all good things must to end

[igotmyionyou32]

\\Some highlights and a recap of my first day back for my junior year in american public school (Midwest) for my 2 mutuals. For timing reference my first period starts at 7:50 am. 

Driving to school: A grown ass woman honked at me for trying to pull into the school parking lot. Not even a parent just a mean ass lady. Hoping she has a terrible day.

Homeroom: Was in wrong homeroom class and then was extremely anxious. Group of straight cis football men who for some reason think that we are friends kept saying hi to me.(I only refer to to their sexuality in this way because they are verbally homophobic and say faggot as members of society who have been explained to MULTIPLE times (by me) that the use of this kind of language by someone who is at the top of the food chain is gross and unnecessary). They do not care but will keep saying it over and over idc.

1st Period (Computer Science A): Sat in the wrong seat and had to move. Almost had a meltdown over ice breakers.

2nd Period (AP Environmental Science): I think I’m really going to enjoy this class. I have good amount of people I know/newish friends so I wasn’t too anxious and the get to know you form asked for my pronouns which always feels nice. Teacher already knew who I was because apparently my Earth/Space teacher had said good things about me. I also once showed her the pictures I took of the moon with my telescope (I do this often and always email them to my favorite female science teachers cause they are amazing).

3rd Period (Dual Credit Ivy Tech Solar System Astronomy) I am the ONLY one in my whole school taking this. So excited but it doesn't start until the 22nd cause its through a college. I just sat in the library and went and picked up parking permit from the office.

3rd Period/Junior class meeting: Sat with two of my best friends and goofed tf around just like last year and listened to why keeping the doors locked at all times is a better solution to school shootings than just not allowing guns??? Also no hats cause if you try to bomb the school they cant recognize you ofc. Love America so much.

4th Period. (Physics) Was very excited but the teacher is very sexist and a bit creepy. Just leaving it at that I’m not getting into it yet I’m still mad.

5th Period (AP Chemistry): Very excited for this course. Struggled a bit in honors last year but that’s cause I did not study lol. Fav teacher and its a small class. Very comforting to see my school mom after being stressed out.

Lunch???: Took like 12 mins to get my food (we get 30 mins to eat) takes me 8 mins to get there so  I get to sit for like 10 mins in an extremely overcrowded room because they took away C lunch. (They were out of a vast majority of the food too).

6th (Pre-calculus/Trig Honors): Least fav class probably. I love math but I struggle with it and i was extremely anxious cause the friend I had in there was very loud (not her fault she can act however she wants) but it kept drawing attention to us and I felt dumb. Also I forgot my fav calculators so I was upset. Very nervous for this course in general. If anyone knows resources to help rebuild bad math foundations and teach yourself algebra 2 then i beg of you.

7. (AP Language): Very excited for this class. Teacher is hot and two of my best friends are in there. Goofed around. Half of the boys that were in my homeroom are in front of us but I feel better that my girls are with me. Very small class too and me and my friend can just walk to our cars cause we park next to each other this year and we can hang and just leave. Although not much hanging today because it was extremely hot and I had to work from 4-8. So since i got out at 2:40 and wait till traffic lightens up around 2:55 I had to book it home if I wanted to drop my shit off and grab a snack.

Overall Id say its not too bad but I’m really just focusing on mt grades this year and trying to actually learn since I’m taking courses in stuff I have actual interest in. I already have some notes and a lab tomorrow in ap chem so I’m gonna read and probably try to sleep. Hope everyone is having an amazing day and thanks for reading lol.

[captainhowlreportingforduty]

Chapter 24: Family ties

((AN: yes i am introducing another oc of mine. can’t stop won’t stop baby))

Everything went according to plan.

Ben presented them the Snake fang and powdered Griffin claw within the first week.

“I have never felt this amount of stress and panic before in my entire life. Save for when I had to do confession at church, maybe.” He breathed heavily.

“Professor Snape asked me to stay behind after class and I thought I was fine for, but he just wanted me to organise some ingredients. I was so nervous the entire time, once he let me go I just booked it all the way from the Dungeons to here.”

This explained the thin coat of sweat on his forehead.

Snake fang and Griffin claw got crossed from the list. The Fanged Geranium and the Standard Ingredient took more time to acquire.

They only ever dared to take about a pinch of dried herbs per lesson, painfully aware of Snape’s watchful eyes. It took them three weeks to collect the proper amount, just as long as it took Penny to get the Fanged Geranium.

Penny had signed up for Greenhouse duty the day after their little congregation and had been enthusiastically accepted by Professor Sprout.

“You know, she signed me up for the entire school year. I’ll have to continued even after we get the Geranium.” She told Thena and Rowan during a Herbology lesson.

“But I’m not even mad, it’s actually quite fun!” Leave it to Penny to be able to get excited about anything.

And at lunch on the Monday two days before Halloween, the only missing ingredient the Fanged Geranium, Penny Haywood, covered in dirt and with a gleeful expression on her face, appeared in the Great Hall and made a beeline for the Ravenclaw table.

“We didn’t forget to tell her to be subtle, did we?” Rowan whispered.

Thena had just enough time to amusedly think about what Merula might make of Penny’s appearance before said Hufflepuff hit the table.

“I got it! I got the plant!” She whisper-yelled.

Neither Thena nor Rowan got to be the first to answer.

“You got a plant? Oh Merlin, Thena, What are you up to now? Who do you want to poison? And who is the Hufflepuff? Wait, do I even want to know?” Chester turned to Theseus.

“Theseus, do I want to know what’s going on?”

“Nah, it’s fine. They are doing that under my supervision.”

“Is that supposed to reassure me?”

Theseus gracefully ignored him, instead facing Penny with a smile.

“I think some introductions are due. This miserable boy here next to me is Chester Davies, Ravenclaw Prefect. I myself am Theseus ap Helyg.”

Penny’s eyes widened as she heard Theseus’ surname.

“Nice to meet you, I’m Penny, Penny Haywood.” Her gaze flicked to Chester.

“Can I borrow Thena and Rowan for a minute?”

Chester just sighed.

“Yeah yeah, go off my chaos children. Don’t get killed, don’t kill anyone, and if you do, make sure there’s no evidence.”

Once Rowan and Thena got Chester’s okay, nothing held them at the table anymore. 

“It’s great you have the plant, but what are we going to do now?” Rowan whispered.

“We haven’t found further information regarding the arm bone nor would we know where to acquire one, as with the salamander blood!”

Penny just shook her head at them.

“You two are unbelievable. Get Ben and make sure you aren’t followed, there’s something we need to talk about.”

“Ben is already waiting at the entrance.” Thena pointed out

And truly, the Gryffindor was already waiting for them.

“What? You weren’t exactly subtle, I had plenty of time to wait for you here.” He threw a last look over his shoulders as they entered the Artefact Room, to make sure no one was following them.

“A quick summary of the status quo.” Penny started as soon as the door closed behind them.

“The only two ingredients missing are an arm bone of unspecified origin and the salamander blood. I can’t start brewing the potion without the arm bone, the salamander blood can wait a bit longer, since the potion has to mature for several days.”

Rowan frowned. “But we knew all that already! Why did you so suddenly want to talk with us if it’s just about something we already know?”

Penny looked at Rowan, dumbfounded.

“You really didn’t notice?” Rowan and Thena exchanged a confused look, both shaking their heads.

“Oh, you two morons! It’s because you came to me for the potion and you ask me all the questions regarding it while you are literally friends with Theseus. Ap. Helyg.”

She paused to let the information sicker into their brains for a minute. Realisation didn’t take long to come.

“Oh cach... we are so stupid....” Rowan just nodded in agreement, apparently speechless at her own incompetence.

Ben was just extremely confused.

“Hi! I’m also here and I do not know what this is about. Is Theseus a genius potioneer?”

“Oh, you’re right, Ben. It’s a wizarding thing, you couldn’t know.” Thena collected her thoughts for a moment before starting to explain.

“Theseus per se is no genius potioneer, at least as far as I know. But his family, the Helyg’s, they have like this giant potions imperium, WillowPotions. It has been a family business for centuries-“

“-since 1300, to be exact.” Rowan continued.

“WillowPotions has created many potions that are commonly used today and they keep updating them as well. A lot of the potions in our schoolbooks weire either invented by them or potions by WillowPotions built the foundation for other potions.”

“Their biggest expertise lies within the medical field.” Thena decided it was her turn again.

“St Mungo’s - basically the magical hospital here in Britain - gets nearly its entire stock of potions from WillowPotions!”

Now it was Ben’s turn to look at Thena and Rowan, dumbfounded.

“And that just never occurred to just one of you? Not any of the times you were talking to Theseus?”

“In my defense, I never quite caught his surname!” Rowan protested. Ben fixed his eyes on Thena, who raised her hands as if in surrender.

“Okay, I have no real excuse. But I kind of grew up with that family, you get used to the fact that they own a potion industry pretty fast, especially when you’re a child and the only thing that matters to you is the lake behind their house!”

Maybe Thena got a bit louder than she had to. She didn’t even know why talking about this affected her that much.

Rowan frowned.

“Hold on a Minute. Didn’t you tell us you hadn’t seen Theseus in ages?”

Thena chuckled bitterly. 

“I used to see him like at least once a week. We’d play together, hide and seek, catch, he sometimes through me into the lake. My- my brother was there with us some times as well...” Thena furrowed her brows.

“I don’t remember what he was doing when he wasn’t with us. Maybe talking to Aunt Cassie? Doesn’t matter. Well, once Jakob pissed off and left me alone, my mam decided that self isolation would somehow bring him back or I don’t know what she was telling herself. Or rather, she always got to go to Aunt Cassie’s. Whenever Theseus came home for the holidays, mam didn’t want me to ‘interrupt their family time'. I don’t know what’s up with that, maybe she just doesn’t like him. She didn’t even attend family galas anymore, and she used to be all about this exclusive glamour stuff.”

Her friends remained silent for a while, Thena’s bitter words hanging heavy in the air.

Penny finally cleared her throat, trying to break the uncomfortable silence.

“Why would she even be allowed at a family gala? I hear the Helyg’s are pretty exclusive. Yeah okay, I keep up with them, I love gossip, alright?” She defended herself when Rowan sideyed her.

Thena just shrugged.

“Oh yeah, right. We’re related on my mam’s side.”

“YOU ARE?” Penny squealed, making Ben jump.

“Rowan, did you know that? Did you know that?”

Rowan adjusted her glasses and answered in a matter-of-fact tone.

“Honestly, no. But like, I meet the sister of infamous Jakob Smith. I join her mission and find out she hasn’t read a newspaper in ages, but can read Runes, play the guitar, speak at least three languages and has learned Ancient Greek and Latin. She also managed to get a potion to explode on her face, a plant to attack her and to win a duel in her first week here and she managed to stay in Chester’s good graces. Her relation to the Helyg family isn’t the wildest thing she has pulled. Nothing surprises me anymore.”

Thena high fived her. “Hell yeah, that’s my best friend!”

She turned her focus back to the group.

“Now let’s go attack Theseus with questions once again!”

Ben was the last to stumble out of the Artefact Room.

“Wizarding relations are weird.” He mumbled to no one in particular.

***

Since Theseus had lessons that Monday afternoon and they didn’t want to jump him early in the morning with Chester around, it was lunchtime the next day when Rowan and Thena were waiting for him at the entrance of the Great Hall, trying not to drown in the flood of students entering the Hall.

“And who might you two be waiting for?” Chester said instead of a hello. 

He was, surprisingly, alone. Usually he and Theseus were attached by the hip, regardless of them being in different years. Thena wondered if Theseus ever accidentally attended Chester’s lessons instead of his own.

“We’re waiting for Theseus!” The Girls answered in unison.

“We need to talk about something important with him. Alone.” Thena added, before Chester could get the idea to wait for him with them.

But apparently she had said the wrong thing, seeing as worry crept into Chester’s expression. Thena groaned mentally.

“Oh would you just let it go, Chester?” She said with an edge. He looked at her all confused.

“Oh please, it’s practically written on your bloody forehead. Yeah, I won’t tell him, for Merlin’s sake, but could you just stop making a- a- you don’t say making an elephant out of a mosquito in english, do you? Nevermind, just stop making such a big deal out of such a small thing! Tell him or let it go, Jesus!”

“Alright, alright!” Chester put his hands up as if surrendering to the enemy.

“Calm down, Thena. I’ll let it go.” He walked off into the Hall.

Thena took a deep breath.

“Maybe you should just blackmail him to get the backstory to this.” Rowan proposed.

“There has to be a past event behind all of this.”

“Or Chester’s just his overcautious self, as Theseus put it. I am not yet desperate enough to threaten him, but it does suck that I can’t  ask Theseus about it.”

“Speaking of the devil...”

Rosen nodded to where Theseus came walking towards them, deep in conversation with... wow. A gorgeous Gryffindor girl. 

She had short, but fluffy ginger hair, her circular blue earrings matched her blue and brown eyes that gleamed when she laughed at something Theseus had said and her lips were delicately painted in a soft red.

Theseus must have noticed the two girls staring at them, since he turned to the redhead.

“Sorry Mary, we’ll have to catch up later, I think my assistance is needed...”

Mary, as the Gryffindor was apparently called, followed his gaze to the two young Ravenclaws.

“Ah yes, I see your children are in need of parental guidance!” She softly touched his arm with her perfectly manicured hand and gave him and equally soft smile.

Even her voice was angelic. But there was a lot else to unpack in this sentence. 

Once Theseus was close enough, Thena and Rowan blurted out the really important questions.

“Children? Parental guidance?” and “Who is she?” was asked in unison. Theseus chuckled.

“I’m just going to ignore that, Thena, and move straight to Rowan’s question. That is Mary Brown, a friend of mine and obviously a Gryffindor.”

“I always thought Chester was your only friend.” Thena mumbled before she could stop herself. Theseus just snorted.

“Thanks for the vote of confidence. But no, I actually developed a social life in all the years I’ve been at Hogwarts, and it’s not limited to just Chester, thank you.”

He ran a hand through his honey brown curls, his signature dangling earring, always on the right side, glistening in the light, reminding Thena of Mary’s eyes.

“Did you two Pipsqueaks just wait here to pester me about my social life or do you actually want something? Do I have to send Myfanwy another letter?”

“Kind of, actually.” Rowan replied.

“We are having problems with a potion-“

“Dear Lord, you always manage to get the complicated stuff.” 

At their confused glances, he elaborated.

“Myfanwy doesn’t do potion instructions via letter. She doesn’t like not being able to keep an eye on the potion she is instructing or something like that.”

“We actually only need the ingredients!” Thena tried.

“It’s for a Strengthening Solution. We don’t know what the instructions mean by an 'arm bone' and we can’t seem to get our hands on some salamander blood!”

“Okay, okay. I can actually help you with that. Just use any kind of arm bone. Actually hold on, maybe don’t use a human one. I don’t want you digging around in a graveyard or whatever you crazy children are capable of.”

He worked a hand through his curls again. He probably didn’t even notice that he did it.

“Unfortunately, you caught the first year I’m actually staying at Hogwarts for the Halloween feast instead of returning home for Samhain, I promised Chester to help with the chaos. Otherwise, I could have brought the salamander blood back with me. I guess you’ll just have to wait until Yule then.”

Rowan and Thena exchanged a glance.

“Thats alright, we’re just glad we’re even getting it! Thank you, Theseus!”

“You’re welcome, chaos children. You can repay me by not making me regret not asking you why you’re illegally brewing a potion.”

As she followed Theseus into the hall, Thena wondered why he was so ready to help them. Was it just in his nature?

He did help Chester with basically everything he asked of him as well. But he had had constant contact with Chester for the past years, in contrast to with Thena.

And it was different to help someone manage some wild children and to help someone with something that had already made another person go missing.

Then was it because he had known Jakob? Or maybe because he pitied Thena? He had siblings as well, didn’t he. A younger sister, Miele, and an... older one, right? He had mentioned her name before.

Still, Thena just couldn’t recall it, not for the life of her. Hm. Weird.

#thena aeronwyn smith #rowan khanna #ben copper #penny haywood #chester davies #theseus ap helyg #mary brown #thena smith and the lost cause #thena smith and the legend of the vaults #hphm #hphm mc #my writing

[literary-mafuyu]

School teacher ratings PART TWOOOKQIJEI!?? ;?! 'NNVNNDJNFNNX !!!!!!!! 👹👹👹 not naming anyone so if any of people I know sees this they can sue me because I technically didn't say the names

Filipino Teacher: oh my god my worst subject yet holy shitttyhhj THE LOWEST GRADES I HAVE and BRUH THE PROJECTS OH THE PROJECTS SPECIALLY THE ACTING IT'S CRYFULL she's vvvvvery kind thooo I like her over the course of quarters her exam got easier so 8/10 I'm fine with lower grades YIPPIEEEE 😁😁😁😇😇😇🥳🥳🥳🥳🥳 she even teached class even though she has a growing womb on her PROPS TO TGAT, doesn't change the fact that Filipino class is so boring but I'm rating the teacher not the subject sooo

AP Teacher: YES YES YEAGHHHRHHHHHRHJD she's vvvvvery nice tooo her exams is possible and passable yeahhhdhh SHE EVEN CUTS A SHIT TON PARTS OF THE BOOK THE BORING ONES LETS GOOOOOOOOOOOO 9/10 I'm feeling generous I'm not gonna rate 10 unless the teacher is VERY VERY VERY TOO TOOOOO GOOD. YIPPIEEEEEE 🥳🥳 Ap is also fucking boring as fuck I don't even listen for the most times

Tle teacher: still the same though he got stricter ever since there was a college student trainee nothing much to say but he has a more feeling of professional not like I heard him say "do you have a problem passing the test?" He said it in such a concerned voice when the student answered barely to NOTHING on the test paper. Exams are still easy but it wasn't made by him soo... 8.5/10, decent and lowkey absent, nothing much to say.

Mapeh teacher: boi if the tle teacher was absent this man is NOT ON EARTH yeah he supervises the trainees. Gets mad for no fricking reason LIKE CHILL FOR A MOMENT, I KNOW BEING A TEACHER IS STRESSFUL BUT BIOLOGICALLY THEY ARE NOT YOUR CHILDREN. I'd say he's kind of verbally abusive. The basketball team for him was really good I don't know how he fucked shit up BECAUSE THEY LOST and he was PRESSURING THEM. like they were good CAN YOU PLEASE JUST BE A LITTLE SUPPORTIVE. THEY ARE STUDENTS THEY CAN'T BE A TROPHY BRO. OH AND NOT TO MENTION THE FAVORITISM, LIKE WHY AM I 99 I'M NOT EVEN THAT GOOD AND I'M LAZY WITH THE ACADEMICS MY CLASSMATE WORKED HARD FOR SHIT AND HIS GRADES DIDN'T EVEN LIFT ONCE. A WHOOPING 5/10 next pls.

Tle substitute college student teacher: She deserves a section here because BRO SHOOK THE WHOLE FUCKING SECTION. GETTING WRONG BECAUSE YOU DID PUT S ON YOUR ANSWER IS CRAZYYYY DAWG 😭😭😭😭 ABOVE HALF FAILED EVEN ME AT THE QUIZ AND SHE STILL THINKS WE HAVE A PROBLEM BECAUSE WE DIDN'T HAVE A GOOD GRADE 😭😭😭😭 she knows how to teach with real confidence but she also goes with the strict vibe like "pls don't be friendly with me because I'm a teacher and it's my rules." Personally I think this is queen shit right here but GURL THE S WRONG IS JUST UNJUSTIFIED. The tle teacher even asked to rate her 10 to 0 I didn't raise my hand but THEY ALL RAISED AT 10 BOI I KNOW YOU LYING— the boys in the back just holding themselves to raise their hand at five. I think the strict vibe is okay but there's just one time at the exam we were taking the test papers and girl was just sitting there. Using her phone. WITH VOLUME I CAN HEAR YOUR "DADDY'S HOME AUDIO" MISS (not sure if it's daddy's home but it was something like a tiktok audio not sure) that was just no, just no. Personally I'd rate her like uhhh... 8.9/10 it'd be 9.5/10 if she corrects the strict checking I'm sure when she becomes a teacher she'll get taught not to do that soon enough. (Monday is her test I'm sure she'll become a teacher then I'm 180% sure)

Math teacher: unprofessional. She's lazy, forgets to remind important stuff, messed up the test paper bad multiple time but she teachers the math nice so we can understand yeah! She's a very good vibe even though that 9.3/10 YIPPIE next

English teacher: I like the subject! The projects have so much potential for creativeness I even drew a manga on a whole karton for one project. I LIKE LIKE LIKE LIKE THE PROJECT WE EVEN HAVE TO MAKE A POSTERS COOL COOL VERY COOL I CAN SHOW OFF MY GRAPHIC DESIGN SKILLS AND WRITING TOO YIPPIEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE I LOVE THE TEACHER THE PROJECTS HAVE A BROAD CHANCE FOR CREATIVITY EVEN THOUGH SOMETIMES I GET LAZY FOR IT BUT I PASS AN ASSIGNMENT BAD OR GOOD UNFINISHED OR FINISHED LIKE HECK YEAH THE LESSONS ARE NEVER BORING TOO THE TEACHER IS KIND HE ISN'T THAT HARSH AT THE COLLEGE TRAINEES EVEN THOUGH THEY MESS UP ALOT HE PROBABLY EVEN HELPED THEM TO MAKE THE LESSON MORE FUN THE LESSON ALWAYS STARTS WITH SOME SORT OF GAME ALSO I DON'T THINK HE'S GOOD AT ONLINE CLASSES BUT F2F CLASSES ARE THE BEST 10.2/10 YAHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

Science teacher: oh god, I saved the best(worst) one for last, half of the students HATES HER HELL EVEN I DO LIKE WHAT THE FUCK DO YOU MEAN WHEN WE HAVE HAVE TO MEMORIZE THE FLIPPING PERIODIC TABLE WHEN YOU MAKE US BE WARY OF THE FUCKING ENUMERATIONS SURE YOUR EXAMS ARE EASY BUT YOU BARELY EXPLAIN STUFF IN THE CLASS, YOU BERATE A STUDENT PUBLICLY WHEN THEY DON'T DO GOOD. YOU MESS UP ALOT OF THE ANSWERS but yeah.... I guess we should give people a chance...... Some people ain't perfect..... But fucking hell are you serious. You give like a shit ton of homework you demand for it and then you don't check it in the end....? Come on man.... I think she's too old to be a teacher but she's trying her best. The exams aren't completely bad either now but I hold grudges in the past so 5/10 maybe I can forgive her

#rant #teachers #filipino teachers #rating my teachers for no reason #rating my teachers for no reason part 2 #part 2

[ragamourne]

tw ed vent and whatnot, BLOCK, do not report!! this is my safe space :')

binged today, i sort of feel bad about it but theres a point where i feel like im so aware of ana that i just might want to make her (and myself in a way) just mad in a sense i guess. i had a good 1300+ cal over binge but for some reason it didn't make me feel so disgusted with myself like i usually am. probably cause i was too stressed to care from AP classes and math.

i also told my cousin my struggles finally, saying that i could have it but i wasn't sure (i feel like im paranoid about it like I'm a w4nn4r3xyc) but told her i had been cutting calories consistently for the whole month of march, i nap a lot too--i said it was the stress but she said the calories.

i also feel a little lonely considering everyone on 3d tumblr with ana (the meanspo-esque and vent posts) are so, so much deep into than i am which sort of fuels the fire of me being so paranoid im faking. I don't hate myself for who i AM, just for what i look like honestly. maybe I'm crazy.

anywho i got a pewdiepie limited gfuel energy drink for tomorrow's fast!!! very excited!!! 🫂🫂🫂

#tw disordered thoughts #ed not ed sheeran #🌟ving #tw 3d vent #tw #vent #eating disoder trigger warning #disordered eating mention #tw eating issues #i wanna lose weight #wannarexic #ana #ana vent #anarex14

[thelengthyposts]

Senior Year Madness

It all begins in the last month of your JUNIOR year in June...

they make you ALL excited because it was "going to be sooooo much easier than junior year" ..right?

WRONG.

but. u didn't know that then. so... u enter Senior year in Aug/Sept in that mindset.

then you're doing ok... that is until senioritis strikes BECAUSE of the "senior year is easy mentality"

....then your grades go down.

on top of that.. guess what. it's OCTOBER-NOVEMBER season.

....college applications abound!!!

..it all ends in November 30th...if all you apply to are public universities....

if private... that ends somewhere in january. if community college? u don't even have to worry about it till after graduation...i think.

anyhow. so i applied to public universities. and got done with all my applications on the last day of november.

cool right?

kinda. for me, anyhow.

some people.. who need higher SAT scores need to take the December SATs.... and sometimes the January ones too.

but I was lazy so.. I didn't. ..now I know I should have. but. oh well. that's life.

so... life continues. your 1st semester ends in DEATH. ..lol...well, close to it. at least mine did.

and u go on to 2nd semester.

then february comes and CSUs start giving their admission results.

..it seems EVERYONE got their SJSU admissions, but i still have no reply... guess that's how it is if you're financially disabled..yes. disabled. LOL.... [i finally got it in April..geesh, seriously? 2 months late? anyhow.]

so. end of february.... u get admission from one csu... but they request your 1st sem grade... of death.

..scared and confused.... u only send them your transcript without the 1st sem senior grade. and u complete your admission.

...but now u worry WHAT IF in July, when they see that grade of death they withdraw your "conditional admission" ?

...hmmm..oh well. that's life. so...you go and forget it for a while.

then March comes. and UC decisions are about. applied in 3? got in in 1... got in in the one that TOLD YOU they were gonna accept u EITHERWAY when u apply.

so. you're all happy and cool. right?

not really. because then your ENGLISH senior project kicks you in the chin and buries you alive for the next 30 days... until the 17th of April..when it's due.

yay. boo.

so. anyhow. back to the UC. you're happy and cool.

april ROLLS fast. with you digging your grave deeper and deeper EVERYDAY with all the tests [both high school and college].. and essays.. and projects.. and to top it all off... college pressure.

so. anyhow. you FINALLY manage to gather yourself and check your college things because the stress of senior project is done. right?

well. 'tis not done. college stress takes over.

so. u find out u need to update your grade in the UC website. the 1st sem grade. so u do... and u explain why you have the grade of death. and promise you'll do better.

so. FINALLY. cool, right? .....NOT.

coz then you have to decide on which college to say yes or no from...by May 1.

what's bad is you don't know what will happen if you say yes to the one that would reject you.

yet, u know u should start taking care of everything because u need to find the housing and stuff for the university.

TO TOP IT ALL OF.

April 21 -- English writing of some sort. Extra credit really. but you need it BECAUSE you want to cushion your grade JUST IN CASE your senior project will become the death of you in June at the day of the finals. oh. and math tutorial. yeah. takes time out of your sched too.

April 22 -- AP Bio test on ch. 43 AKA the test that would MAINTAIN your grade to a C....or doom it forever to a D... thus getting you rejected in the college. [cross your fingers now and PRAY i maintain the grade of get a higher grade or else....I WILL BREAK YOUR FINGER]

ahem.

anyhow.

April 23 -- Book report. Great.

April 24.. should just DIE. Why? hm..let's see. here are the following reasons: a) Trig/Precal test... aka the test that you should get an A or B on... or you get rejected in all colleges u apply to. end of story. great. how to get an A or B when you've never gotten a C? ...miracles happen i suppose? yes. they will. u will make sure of it. [again. cross your fingers... u know the drill]

b) AP Government Research Paper...that nobody wants to write ANYWAY. you and your classmates simply do not see the point. anyhow. it's supposed to be 6 pages long.. blah blah blah

c) AP Biology PRACTICE AP TEST ...not really a hassle. since it will only be for you and your benefit alone. but the fact remains IT WILL TAKE 5 hours of your time away from doing other work.

...April 25 then: 1) part 1 of your SUPER ASS LONG AP Gov test. it's ok..... won't kill u much.... won't make u bleed either.. but IT WILL TIRE YOUR BRAIN. and from all that activity the previous day? you're already dead anyway. 2) LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOONG trip to LA for a WEDDING. 6-7 hours. car trip. looooooooong. uncomfortable. looooooooong. 3) ...you'll probably sleep late because it's the 1st time in AGES u and your cousins spoke to each other

April 26... 1) u wake up early. as part of the wedding entourage.. u need to prepare. oh. and the wedding is at lunch time. great. the fact your hair is STRAIGHT and LONG.. and you need to CURL it. great. 2) after the wedding = party. most likely till night when u can no longer lift any part of your body due to your extreme fatigue. or when everyone around u starts puking coz they're drunk. yay. [well... maybe the latter was a BIT exagerated. anyhow]

April 27....sunday 1) u get back to your car in that looooooooooooong trip back to north cali. great. again. 2) u have a gov test the next day. oh great. yay.

..and it seems your suffering is over? ..yeah. to yourknowledge at the moment it seems.

well. until May 1st..anyway. or at least April 30th. wow. 3 days break only? you won't be able to revive yourself in time. and u know it.

so. April 30: you stress all day. thinking which college to say yes or no about. in the meantime, in school. ..panoramic pictures. yay. reminds u more of the impending college decision u have to do by midnight that same night.

May 1: u say yes. and say no. then u pray to god and all the saints to HEAR u. oh. and u get the cap and gown. yay. oh. and u need to sign up for that UC test.. if u said yes to the UC one.

so.

May 6th comes. = AP Gov test. the real one. cool. easy. but stressful nonetheless.

then May 10... 1) u WAKE UP EARLY. drag yourself to Los Altos and take the English writing test for the UC. just in case that it the one u said yes to. 2) the test will be over around 11:45. you'll be home by 12:3ish. 3) at some point. u call your friends. and u make plans. IF YOU DIDN'T ALREADY MAKE THEM. u better have though. so if your friends are reading this, they BETTER NOT PROCRASTINATE and help u more with your impending death. 4) prom. at 8. yay. another reason to make yourself a zombie. tired? very? well. who cares. it's a paaaaaaaaaaaaar-taaaaay. 5) oh. and u go home tired. and prolly late too.

...May 11. mother's day. u don't do anything coz you're a zombie in your deathbed remember?

May 12. AP BIO test. great. hopefully. u slept well last night. or your dead. your future depends on this test too. u better get a fucking five. oh. that rhymes.

then all is over....right? well. no. because u won't get your peace of mind because of the fact that it's international week. and the school will be loud all week. oh. and you're president of the french club. meaning u need to manage those crepes you guys will be selling. wow. good luck on that. just don't die..k? you're a bit young in my opinion.

ok. so. after that.. all stresses are gone. just anticipation really. and....lotsa sleep. u need it. u've been going at it for 3 weeks straight. surprise u haven't died yet.

hn.

so. last week of May. u go to your teachers. ask if you won't get the grade of death-- D-- in the end. if no.. then you're back in CSF. if not. well. fuck that shit. [coz that means you've ruined your future... at least till u think of a solution]

so.

if all went well. you're cool and happy and all. if not... well. u get snappy. then eventually u forget about it..right? well. we hope so. u can get pretty mean.....

anyhow.

1st week of June = finals. GAMBATTE!! <-- do your best

2nd week of June = rehearsals + beach day. ah. beach day. takes your mind off of things. yay. oh. and u graduate.

and pretty much. your stress returns. u fear for the college u said yes to. will they accept u? hopefully. they better. or you'll start packing and cross the ocean.

so. July 15 comes along. your grades are given top the college.

then if it's all good. u have more stress coz everything's changing and u need to arrange stuff. move out. all that.

if no. well. who knows. maybe a plane ticket. yeah.

and so....

if you're still alive by august. good job. you've survived senior year. you'll need the survival skills for college too.

if you've already died...well......... hopefully u come back to life at some point. but then naturally u do..u get over things rather easily after all.

so. the end?

meh.

transmission terminated.

i don't care if you're religious or not. pray to your God and help me.

· • —– ٠ ✤ ٠ —– • ·  · • —– ٠ ✤ ٠ —– • ·  · • —– ٠ ✤ ٠ —– • · 

This is a backdated post.

The original post my 17-year-old self wrote is on deviantart.

#backdated post #blogging #high school #senior year #life #deviantart

[imanonymous110]

May 9th, 2022

I know this coming out a day late, don't judge me. So sorry for the long break anyways, between basketball practice and studying for AP tests and finals I've been SUPER busy.

So I still have my crush on Bee but I still can't figure out whether she even likes girls or not. Like it would make sense with her personality, but I don't wanna just wear judge too quickly and then her be like super homophobic or something. Max (my former crush) is super supportive of me having a crush on her and we are like besties now. Which is a relief. I didn't wanna have him crushing on me super hard while I'm falling for a woman.

TW Emotional Abuse

I had to put a trigger warning for this next section. If you feel this would trigger you, skip this part. I'll put a marker where it ends. Stay safe.

Trigger Warning starts here

Ok so yesterday my mom got super mad about my sister not doing her shoulder stretches (she has hyper mobility in her shoulder) exactly when my mom wanted and exactly how my mom wanted. So what does she do, naturally, she only yells at me on the car ride to my basketball practice. How do I know she's only yelling at me you may ask, Im the only other one in the car, my sister stayed home. She starts yelling at me saying I'll never be successful and I will never be able to live on my own and how I should be grateful that's she "rides on me as hard as she does", because if she didn't I would be just like her and FAIL OUT OF COLLEGE. She also tells me how I'm always going to end up like 500 pounds and I can't come crawling to her for weight loss surgery when I'm older. (Mind you I am 6'0 and in pretty decent shape, when she is 5'6 on a good day and probably can run like 2 feet without collapsing.) Lady is just making up scenarios at this point. She is just displacing her trauma on to me and I hate it, but I keep telling myself, "Only two more years." Then im in college and my dad said I can visit as often or as rare as I want. I can't wait to move out.

Trigger Warning End

I took my math and chem finals today and MY CHEM TEACHER SAID WE CANT GET OUR SCORES UNTIL NEXT WEEK. I think I did okay but like I don't know if did. I have no finals tomorrow surprisingly and I have my english final thursday and my history final aswell.

That's all I have for today. Can't wait to see bee at basketball practice today :)

With all love,

Your favorite (stressed) anonymous blogger

#personal blog #stressed #finals week #basketball #bisexaul #Spotify

[onlyhereforduckmemes]

#ap classes #apush me off a cliff #apush notes #apush #ap got me mad stressed #i have so much homework to do for apush #apush memes

[is-the-primate-vid-cute]

I love your blog, and I love apes and monkeys! And I have to say that, beyond just the ethical issues (which are a dealbreaker entirely on their own), I think primates acting funny in a natural environment is just, like, inherently funnier? It’s just a lot more fun to see primates acting like primates, than the humour being that they are acting like humans, or interacting with humans (unless they are humans I guess gsggshdhd).

Do you have any more funny ape stories? I love those so much they are so funny with their WANTS and WILLS

Agreed! They are so funny in their own right!

Ape wants and wills.. hm. As far as first hand experience I can only speak about chimpanzees and whoo boy are they a particular bunch of kiddos.

We regularly gave the chimps blankets for nest building and one chimp made his nest every night in the drain of the enclosure, where the water runs off when we hose the indoor. So his blankets got wet every day and we had to replace them everyday.

And I've mentioned trading before so with a dry blanket, I can point at it and show my reward and the chimps would usually slide the blanket over to me. Sometimes one of the females would suddenly decide she wanted that blanket that was sitting in the dirt so she sometimes refused trades and that's her right. But I could never, ever get them to touch a wet blanket. They hated it even for 2 whole bananas they wouldn't do it. They would play dumb as if they didn't see what I pointed at and would bring me anything else around in an effort to get the reward. Wet blankies are icky!!

One of the female chimps would "dance" to music, she really liked a distinct bass and would rock side to side to the beat. The first few times I saw this I was worried about it being a stress behavior but she stopped whenever I would stop the music.

I've mentioned it elsewhere but every morning when I did first checks, the chimps all wanted to play chase. If I didn't do this, they would get very upset with me.

The matriarch of one of the troupes I worked with was older (59!!) And she she was slowing down and not as mobile as the youngsters so I had to be sneaky and get her extra treats and supplements because she sometimes would get her produce stolen from her. It was fun to sneak around with her bc we would make eye contact, look around to see if any of the other chimps are paying attention, I would flash what I had to give her and we had a spot we would meet where it was easy for me to shove the sandwich or whatever it was through the mesh at a spot where she could easily reach it.

The alpha male of that group was very fast and dare I say, selfish. It's not unusual for the alpha to want all the good stuff to himself but this guy would straight up steal from the elderly lady mentioned above. I always had to bring 2 extras of anything good because if his hands weren't full, he was charging to steal from the matriarch.

Occasionally, though, she would get mad at him for stealing something good and she would cryyyy so loud you could hear it a half mile away at produce storage. She'd swipe at him and yell and get mad and huff away and he would usually approach her later for grooms or other bonding.

A different female chimp had kinda bad hand eye coordination. To feed these guys, the paneling on the roof was wide enough for them to stick an arm out and we would toss up produce or enrichment and they could grab it from the air. Well, she wasn't good at catching and I'm not the best arm so sometimes I would have to toss the same apple or whatever a handful of times before she caught it and when she finally did, she would shake her fist at me and try to fake me out as if she was going to hurl the apple right at my head.

My groups absolutely loved vidoes. I even brought my own tablet from home so they could watch on a bigger screen. Anything with people or animals and especially other chimps were a huge hit and my go-to rainy day enrichment.

One of my groups was extremely difficult to get locked inside to clean the yard. They were super suspicious and wouldn't hang out inside if I was there, regardless of the treats I brought. But, like most chimps, they hated rain. So any day there was a big storm that group would be easily locked in and I had to do all my cleaning and maintenance in that habit in pouring rain. Thanks, guys.

#not primate vid #inquiring minds want to know #chimpanzees #mod E