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#apparently i forgot how to colour sO THESE ARE AWFUL YAY
rosamndpike · 4 years
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TREENA’S 10 YEARS TO 10K! Top ten Scarlett movies | (as voted for by my followers) → FOUR: Avengers: Infinity War (2018) dir. Anthony & Joe Russo
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okaywitheverything · 3 years
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hi! can i request minato fall for naruto kindergarten teacher please? thank you 😁
Ma'am: A Possible New Mom? Minato x KindergartenTeacher!Reader
My actual first request! Hope I did it justice! Thank you honey for the request. I wrote some sort of mixed AU so I hope you don't mind.
 A/N: This took a lot of time because I have a lot of tests every month. Also i threw up a week ago and was somewhat sick. Then I lost the two drafts and was so irritated with ms word but somehow I managed to write again. So a lot of blood, sweat and tears went into this. Please shower it with love if you even read this awful Author’s note.
Positive A/N: I did like how it turned out tho, the ending is too cute and you won't know what to expect as I didn't either. I genuinely hope you have fun reading this piece.
Word count: 3K
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 Your POV
 “It must be fun to play with the kids all day."
People who think that are the biggest fools on the planet in the universe.
You were picking up the various toys scattered throughout the main classroom, sorting them category wise while the kids took a nap. Most of them anyways.
A few babies had insane amount of energies that they refused to sleep whatsoever. But it wasn't as big a problem as people think it is. All kids have different strengths, a variety of ways to function and unique physiology. You knew if a kid was not tired, forcing him or her to doze off isn't healthy.
Just let the kids be.
So that explains why Naruto was alongside you helping you to collect the sponge shurikens scattered around while you put away the stuffed ninkens on the high shelf. Usually Kiba and Rock Lee would be awake as well, and this trio would play in the hall until their limbs gave out but today even they slept after tiring poor Akamaru out for weird challenges.
“Ma’am, I almost forgot! I want to show you something! Come with me!” Naruto suddenly grabbed your hand leaving his task in the midst and urging you to leave yours too. You looked at him puzzled but giggled at his enthusiasm nonetheless, sometimes kids were too darn cute. You loved the ways kids’ eyes lit up, so optimistic and happy and hopeful until the world snatched it all away. You wanted to preserve this for as long as could.
He took you to the room where the kids kept their small backpacks filled with their favourite articles that they thought were absolutely necessary to take everywhere.
No Neji, you don’t need to have three combs for the care of your luscious hair every possible instant.
Naruto generally brought a lot of snacks which you had to retain sometimes so that he would eat healthy but it became even harder to do so when all he wanted was for Sasuke to taste the tomatoey flavour ‘these’ chips had and gift Rock Lee the curry flavour. That boy had a heart of gold.
 He pulled the zipper of his orange backpack open, and took out a stuffed fox.
“Ma’am meet Kurama! I told him all about you and he wanted to meet you!” He held Kurama up while you were gently petting the plushie’s head, he was so excited to see your happiness to meet his esteemed companion.
These kids and their imaginations! You loved every ounce of it!
“Hello Mr. Kurama!” You didn’t feign excitement, you actually were. You loved kids and their creativity and wouldn’t trade it for anything.
“He’s my best friend! Don’t tell anyone else though! Others might get sad.”
You did an action of zipping your lips, “Your secret is safe with me, sweetie.”
“Look! I also drew something!” He hastily handed you Kurama and proceeded to take out his yellow sketchbook. He kept turning pages filled with rainbows of colours morphing into one another that made some sense in his cute, little head and finally reached his desired page. He pulled your dress with his little chubby hands, an action he often did when he wanted you to sit beside him. You kneeled down, his plushie settled in your lap now as you waited for him to go ahead.
He handed you his open sketchbook where there were three figures, two adults and one kid judging by the height, all wearing triangular outfits. One kid and an adult had striking yellow hair and blue eyes while the other adult wore an orange dress with a large circle in their hands. On closer inspection, you saw your own hair colour and eye colour being illustrated to the best of the toddler’s ability, as far as the crayons allowed him to portray it. You had a circle in your hands, almost the size of your drawn head with black spots in between while the child in the photo held an orange squishy ball. To save you from your confusion, Naruto came to the rescue and started explaining.
“That’s me and Dada over here. And I’m playing with Kurama! And that’s you Ma’am! Bringing me and dada cookies for being good boys like you do in class!”
Your heart melted right there and then. For some reason, your face heated up too.
“Oh my God, honey, that’s amazing!” You pecked his cheek as Naruto blushed slightly and rubbed his head, “You liked it?”
“I Loved it! What did Dada say about it?”
“He got so red like Sasuke’s tomatoes haha. But he put it on our fridge like my other drawings and he said it was the best one yet.”
Before you could reply, crying was heard from the nap room and you sighed. Looks like someone woke up.
“Yay, someone is up! We can now play!” Naruto began running but you stopped him.
“Let’s be sure to pack this all up before, Ma’am Anko will see to your friend okay?”
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Minato was waiting alongside other parents, it was 10 minutes till the kindergarten was over. His mind wandered afar, thinking about his journey to this town.
Minato was very afraid when he moved to Konoha, about Naruto settling in and making friends. Of course, back in his previous town he had already got Naruto a place in the best Kindergarten there, pulling all the needed strings but his promotion caught him off guard. Being a single parent was hard enough as it is, and with the worry of adjusting to new surroundings for his growing son, he was almost going to decline the offer. Only after much conviction from his friends that he deserved this, he took the offer, albeit hesitantly.
He was happy with his new workspace and colleagues as well, and was over the moon when he one of his erudite associates had a son the same age as his own, and recommended the city’s best kindergarten where his son was set to go. He went blindly on his associate’s word, because he knew him to be a wise dad.
For the first two months, he had to work relentlessly to prove his position as the new leader in the branch, and so he had his assistant pick Naruto up while he prepared lunch at home for his precious boy, barely making it home fifteen minutes before they did. But when the company celebrated their first real accomplishment, only then did Minato feel he could take a step back and indulge with his son more as he used to do.
When he began picking him up himself, he realised what he had been missing on: small quirky tales, new words his toddler learned, new friends’ names, his favourite teacher’s cookies apparently. Minato quickly noticed, being the perceptive man he was, that Naruto could go hours and hours talking about his Ma’am. He would have thought of it as a crush, had Naruto been older.
But when he first saw you, he could relate to his son if Naruto did have a crush. He knew he was being superficial, being attracted to your appearance at first sight but he couldn’t help himself that you were almost ethereal, too gorgeous to be true. It seemed as if you were glowing when you laughed alongside the kids or held one of them on your shoulders while searching for the parents.
However, your personality was even more so captivating when he finally talked to you at the parents-teachers conference. You were such a quality teacher, he deduced when he noticed how apt you were at describing each kid individually and how dedicated to their growth you were. He loved the bond you had with Naruto, the boy couldn’t stop grinning upon meeting you on his day off.
The bell rung, breaking him out of his reverie, and he waited as the kids ran to the parents, waving goodbyes here and there, ready for their weekend. He could hear your faint shouting over the buzz, “Make sure you have taken all your belongings, kiddos! Have a good weekend!”    
He knew if you had a special place in his son’s heart, he could let you stay in his heart as well.
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It was 8 PM, one hour past the Uzumaki kid’s bedtime, but the blatantly crying kid was nowhere near sleeping. A distressed Minato held him on his hip, as he searched the entire house for his favourite plushie, Kurama, without whom Naruto had never slept.
“We’ll find him, Naru. Do you remember where you last saw it?” Minato asked, pausing and sitting in the comfy sofa, looking at Naruto, hoping he’d have an answer.
Naruto’s wails quietened down, fortunately there were no tears, as he pondered and spoke, “I last showed it to Ma’am!”
Minato sighed, he grasped that Naruto would have left it at the playschool because no inch of his house was unsearched. He settled Naruto down on the couch as he deliberated calling you over a toy. He had your number for emergencies, but was this one? The real objection, the actual reluctance he had for calling was totally different though. He hated to admit it, but talking to Naruto’s daydream of a teacher always left him stuttering like a teenager. He could barely listen and respond when he met her at the kindergarten, but talking to that Goddess one on one was more terrifying and nerve-wracking than moving to a new town.
But he knew there was no way Naruto would sleep without Kurama and it was only Friday, nights to wait if he doesn’t ask you about the plushie today. He couldn’t imagine how disheveled will Naruto be without Kurama by then. He would surely award himself with wine if he managed to finish the call without fainting.
With clammy hands and a vigorously pounding heart, he dialed the number.
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You were finishing up the last batch of forms and cleaning up, when you saw something abruptly put in the otherwise shipshape playroom. Before you could further inspect, your phone rang, Mr. Uzumaki flashing on top of the screen. Your heart hammered as you wondered what he could be calling about.
You were not going to lie, Mr. Uzumaki was easy on the eyes, always in class A condition with his well-tailored suits as he came to pick Naruto up. Even the married housewives ogled him not-so-subtly. He was such an excellent father, really devoted in his son’s life while simultaneously conquering the business world. An eye candy, with all the best qualities that existed, an immensely put together God’s creation. He was dream partner to have, yet somehow he was single.
Your phone’s ring broke you out of your musing, as your sweaty palms grabbed the phone and received the cal.
“Good Evening, Mr. Uzumaki.” You managed out, your neck suddenly heating up.
“Good Evening, Miss. I hope I didn’t disturb you.”
��Not at all, I was about to head home. How may I help you?”
“If you are still there at the playschool, could you please…… If you don’t mind….. I’m sorry again I called-”
“I assure you, it’s fine. You don’t need to worry about it. Although you do need to tell me the problem if you want me to help.” You giggled lightly, amused at that man stuttering.
“Thank you. Umm Naruto left his night time plushie there I suppose and he doesn’t sleep without it. Could you please, please check if it’s there?”
“Of course.” You held the phone and as you hummed and went to the Kid’s playroom you found Naruto’s sketchbook with the drawing laying on it, and the Kurama toy beside it. You swore you promised Naruto pack it earlier in the day.
“Looks like he did leave it here.”
“Can you keep the school open a bit late, I’ll come and collect it right aw-”
“Its pretty windy right now outside, and you’ll have to bring Naruto too at this hour. I’ll drop it at your home on my way back, I was planning in leaving in five anyways.” Your mouth spoke before you could process what you said, offering to go to his house? Nice going there, you desperate weirdo.
His choked out “Okay” almost surprised you as you ended the call.
This will be a nice, little detour.
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About twenty minutes later, the doorbell to the Uzumaki household rang and Minato sprinted to the door, opening it immediately.
There you stood, with tousled hair from the wind, in your long red pea coat and black heels. Your cheeks lightly tinted, no doubt because of the unruly weather outside. Somehow you still looked absolutely perfect in Minato’s eyes as he traced your form, unable to initiate the conversation.
You, on the other hand, had halted completely when the door opened revealing a ripped Minato, his muscles bulging underneath his black shirt while grey sweatpants hung loosely on his hips. His biceps were so thick, you wondered how he managed to exercise on top of all the responsibilities he had.
You handed it over to Minato whose eyes widened at the piece of paper and stood there awkwardly, processing what to say.
Somehow stopping yourself from all the gawking, you cleared your throat as you dug in your black purse and took out Naruto’s best friend and his masterpiece.
“Guess he left this as well.” He gave a forced laugh, trying to make things less uncomfortable after he stood silent for two minutes.
You chuckled lightly in agreement when suddenly thunder boomed behind you, causing you to shriek and slip, only to be caught by Minato, his hands holding you around your middle tightly in a protective manner. You coughed as you stepped back again and he cleared his throat this time when suddenly it started pouring like hell’s rage on Earth.
“You should stay for a while, at least until the rain lightens.”
You were going to decline, but when you saw how bad it was raining, you knew you would have to accept. “Looks, like I’ll have to. Sorry to impose.”
“It’s no imposition at all. I’m inviting you, don’t fret.”
You stepped inside, shrugging your pea-coat off, revealing your black dress underneath. Minato reddened visibly, taking your pea-coat from you and hanging it. He cursed himself as he thought of conversation starters, wanting to say something, anything to not stand like a fool.
“Would you like wine? I have this blush flavoured bottle reading to drink.”
“I would love that, Thank you. What are you celebrating though, if I may ask?” You agreed, maybe the alcohol would calm your buzzing nerves. Besides you were a sucker for wine.
“Nothing much, a simple personal achievement of sorts.” He said with a grin as he led you inside, hopeful of where the night might lead. Maybe the liquid courage would help him finally ask you out.
Behind the wall, Naruto grinned with a pacifier in his mouth. Mission successful.
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So that was that. Until next time, cookies.
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A Summer Breeze Through Winter: Act 1
Chapter 2: Neighbourhood
Gean
Miracles had to be real, because how else would you explain this? It was almost pure luck that he moved into the house just across the street.
I had prayed one day I’d see Otoro again, and I guess my prayers were heard.
I heard news around the block that someone or some people would be moving in the house. The details weren’t clear and there was definitely some controversy about the situation.
At first it was owned by a sweet old man who would always pick fresh vegetables from his garden to share with the street residents. When he was too old to live on his own, one of his grandchildren apparently moved him to a retirement home. Ever since then no one had lived across the street. Every one missed him and his tomatoes. I never knew him very well and didn’t really care to.
My little sis Rachel kept making up stories about it being haunted and that was the real reason the old man left. But that isn’t as important. What is is that he was the one who moved in.
I saw a car pull up to the structure one day, maybe a week after the news. It was silver and shined brightly in the afternoon sunlight. At the time I was in my room on the top floor. I had been waiting there for a few days to see when the family would arrive.
A man stepped out first. I stared at him, excited. Who was he? How did he look? Unconsciously, I began studying him.
He had short borderline white hair that stuck to his head. He was medium toned and short, just taller than the window.
I was captivated in the moment. I don’t know why, but I had just then realized that was the family.
I opened my window and let the summer breeze in and closed my blinds slightly. I didn’t want to seem so obviously staring at them.
The man yelled something in a foreign language at the inside of his car, probably to another person.
It became apparent there was indeed someone else in there.
This was the first time I saw Otoro. My heart jumped in my chest. I clutched my chest as a warm heat filled up my body, and a lump formed in my throat.
It was like he was a new person. When I found him last year after I got lost he had long, brown hair that was held together in a fragile side ponytail by a weak hair tie. Now his hair was down and only reached his shoulders. It curled at the end and bounced whenever he walked. Before, he had bangs that would cover his eyes. Now you could clearly see his light blue irises, glowing no matter the time of day.
I had to catch my breath as to not make any sound. I needed to be silent so I could hear everything.
My heart jumped when I heard him speak in the same foreign language as who I could only assume his dad was. It slipped off his tongue so perfectly, I was jealous and in awe.
They exchanged a few words as they studied the house, backs facing me.
The dad then opened the trunk of the car. Mounds of boxes and luggage sat inside. The boxes were labeled in what looked like Chinese.
If that was indeed Chinese, then Otoro knew how to speak Chinese. The lump in my throat grew bigger at this thought.
A half an hour passed and another car drove up. This one was a solid white colour, with more volume than the other.
Out stepped a woman who looked nothing like the dad. Probably the mother. She had solid brown hair with greying roots, a pale skin tone, and antique-looking glasses.
After her came another girl. She looked about Otoro’s age, very young, and bitchy. A resting bitch face and constantly crossed arms signified she was a troublemaker. She looked more like the father with shoulder long black hair and fair skin. That must have been Otoro’s sister he always talked about. I forgot her name, but it most definitely started with an A.
Otoro was the tallest. The sister came in a close second place, then the mother and father. I studied them and their posture, making a hypothesis about each family member as they made their way around the plot.
A only spoke English. Whenever anyone else talked, A would always jump in and mention how she couldn’t understand them. Otoro would need to translate most everything as the parents would persist in talking in Chinese. I could only assume she didn’t know Chinese because she didn’t care enough to.
The mom was optimistic. She wore a constant smile, even when Otoro and A would be tearing each other's heads off.
The father seemed too tired to healthily function. He would seem to fall unconscious for periods of time and when he would start yelling at A or Otoro his voice appeared to trail off.
I didn’t need to study Otoro, but still I did. He didn’t change at all. He was ever so childish, happy, and teasing. His upbeat personality always lifted everyone’s spirits. Even if he was loud and everyone else got easily annoyed by it, I loved it.
I watched everyday as he and his family worked. Eventually I learned they were speaking Japanese and not Chinese. Also that A’s name was Akasai. And she was indeed a cunt.
One day I was looking at Otoro through his window. He was relaxing on his bed, his back facing me. Everything was calm and for once no one was screaming. I was resting my gaze on his reflection in the big mirror set up on his opposing wall. He looked so beautiful, even in a low quality resolution.
It caught me off guard when he suddenly turned and looked directly at me. It took me a second to realize, but once I did, I panicked. When I closed my blinds I almost ripped them and nearly fell off the barstool I had set up by the window. I collected myself and sat on the ground underneath the windowsill, biting my nails.
‘He saw me. Holy shit.’ My heart was pounding and my mind began playing the entire scene on repeat. It kept speeding up each time.
Finally, after a while I stood up. The sun had gone down. For a while I stood in the middle of my room, then made my way to my bed.
I needed sleep.
Rachel barged into my room suddenly.
“GG!”
I jumped and bumped my head on my bed frame. “Ah! Rara-”
“Wanna go say hi to the neighbours? Mommy said we could go and see them now!”
She had startled me awake so quickly I lost any grip on reality. “God, what time is it?”
“3 pm. You missed breakfast and lunch.”
I had slept in, damn. It was already noon.
“Yeah, yeah, sure. Just get out of my room so I can change.”
“Yay! I’ll do the same, I want to make a good first impression. Don’t take long, too.” She whispered, “Mommy’s gonna beat your ass if you do.”
I waved her off. “Okay. Now leave.”
She skipped away, beaming.
It took a minute for me to sit up, but just a few seconds to remember what happened yesterday. My face heated up quickly. My heart sped up again.
‘No, wait. Don’t think about that. Just change and if he asks, explain everything.’ I thought to myself.
I rushed to get ready. A solid t-shirt, jeans, shoes. That was all. I snatched a small handful of cereal from a box and shoved it down my throat so I wasn’t starving. I didn’t have time to grab my phone, but then again I didn’t really need it.
Before I knew it, I was standing with my mom and Rachel on their front doorstep, anxious and nervous. I was bouncing and chewing my knuckles. Mom rang the doorbell and waited calmly.
Otoro’s mother opened the door.
In English, she greeted us. “Hi!”
My mom waved politely. “Hi there! We’re your neighbours and wanted to say hi.”
She nodded and grinned brighter than before. “You must be from across the street. I saw you mowing your lawn the other day.” Her hand stuck out. “My name’s Katherine, but you can just call me Kathy.”
My mom took Kathy’s hand and shook. “My name’s Irene. These are my kids, Gean and Rachel.”
Rachel waved and grinned “Hi!”
Kathy took her hand back as my mom did. “Wait, did you say Gean?” At the same time she greeted Rara.
My head perked up.
“Yeah, what about him?”
“I think my son may know him. Has he ever gone missing?”
“Uhm… yeah, he has. Why, exactly?”
“I knew the name sounded familiar. My son’s name is Otoro, Gean may know him.” Cathy paused. “Ah! How rude of me! Please, come in!”
“No, it’s alright!” My mom laughed and stepped in. Rachel followed.
The mothers continued talking. Rachel turned and grabbed my hand.
“Are you coming or what?”
I jumped. “Yeah, I am.” I stuttered, not realizing I was still outside.
Then I saw him.
My heart pounded again.
All I could wave as he stood dumbfounded on the steps.
It took him a minute to come down.
He began talking after Kathy said we were neighbours.
“Uh, hi? My name’s Otoro. Nice to meet you. What’s your name?”
I stopped biting my knuckle and fiddled with my shirt. “Er- Gean. We’ve met before.”
“We have?” He thought for a second. “Oh! Izmael?”
“Yeah…”
“We have! God, it’s been so long! I’m so sorry I forgot!” He seemed less awkward now and much happier.
“It’s all right.”
We talked for a while there in the foyer, catching up little by little.
“Hey,” Kathy jumped in. “Otoro, why don’t you go show Gean your room and hang out while I talk with Irene?”
“Sure! C’mon, Izzy. Let’s go, I’ll show you my room.”
I nodded and followed him upstairs.
I didn’t leave his side since that day.
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akingdomtheorist · 5 years
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KH Catch Up: KH2FM Part Incredibly Sassy
So apparently I forgot about posting this before we played a bunch so here’s a long post about commentary! All the revisits, dubbed PART WHATEVER are short since that story section was quite short.
"What were we doing again? Right we were looking for the swirlies."
HOLLOW BASTION
"Oh hello wiggly bois."
"Oh, it's Advent Children Cloud. Oh god this is him in his edgy bastard game."
"Sephiroth? Sora, we got bodied by him."
"Aerith, you aren't dead in this timeline."
We detract to go visit our very good friend Pooh. He still does not remember the Sora.
"What is that? Who are you? Hmm, I wonder who they could have been talking about." "You really don't remember who those are?" "I genuinely don't. Gimme a name." "You gotta promise not to be made at me." "Okay."
And then I found out he's NEVER PLAYED FINAL FANTASY X OR X-2.
"Remember how KH1 was press X to win?" "Yeah?" "Well KH2 is press X AND Triangle to win." "Gotcha."
-suddenly Leon- "WHERE DID YOU COME FROM?"
"Why are we now in Aperture Science? Oh of course Ansem runs Aperture Science, of course he's Cave Johnson."
"Uh, hi Stitch? WAIT IS STITCH IN THIS GAME?"
"Hi GlaDOS." -at Master Control-
SPACE PARANOIDS
"This is Megaman!" "No it's not!" "It's Megaman Battle Network."
"Who the fuck are you?" I AM COMMANDER SARK.
"Oh this is I have No Mouth but I Must Scream. No wait this is like Ready Player One!"
"Tron." "FINALLY!"
"Sora.EXE. Donald.EXE. Goofy.EXE"
"No we're Digimon."
"THIS IS REBOOT!"
"Good thing we have a giant key. Wait do we still have our giant key? WE DO STILL HAVE OUR GIANT KEY!"
Finding out Tron's user was Ansem the Wise "He's out best friend! -cough-"
BACK TO HOLLOW BASTION
"But, if we go by my theory that Ansem the Wise is different from the Ans-hole we killed, we have hope."
"Door to Darkness?"
"Mickey!"
"Yeah like Ansem is super dead!"
BACK TO SPACE PARANOIDS
"I've played Deadline in GTA. I can do this."
"Yeah we'll be fine once we access the Door to Darkness, that's never gone wrong."
-at the mini boss- "You know you could have froze him, and then used your Set Up limit?" "Yeah well I didn't think of that so uhhhhhh..."
HOLLOW BASTION AGAIN AGAIN
Through various self pats on the back of being the best plot detective, he is very smug with himself.
"Sephiroth- wha, what are you compensating for?!"
"Uh bitch? Step away from my computer? Uh no- no..."
"Oh my god, have you heard of an elevator? That's a ramp, you could slide down that thing!"
I need to make an excuse me count for the amount of times he's said it about the plot.
"HOW MANY ANSEMS ARE THERE?!"
Demyx appears "Oh do we gotta kill a bitch?" He has no idea.
It only took him too tries.
"Good thing Goofy took that hit, he's got plot armor!"
"Oh nevermind, he's super fucking dead!"
"THEY KILLED GOOFY! BUT HE'S IN THREE, I KNOW THEY DIDN'T KILL HIM!"
"Goofy your husband is mad at you."
"Are we about to Dynasty Warriors this?" Thus the battle for 1000 Heartless began. He very much enjoyed himself.
"Mickey would rather jump through a door to darkness than answer the fucking question."
REVISITS
PORT ROYAL
"I like how they waited for us to have that little exchange before the fight."
"This really ruins the mood when you can see Donald, Goofy, and Anime-Sword-Boi in the background."
Gains a summon "Yay Peter Pan! He'll shank a bitch!"
LAND OF DRAGONS PT WHATEVER
"Oh no not this again."
"Wait, I know that sword. Riku how could you?"
"How many times do i gotta teach you this lesson old man?"
He does not approve of Xigbar running away.
"Man Shang's gonna kick our asses if Mulan dies."
"I know the city's in danger but there are chests here can you guys handle a little burning for five minutes?"
That must be Riku! "Only he's that much of an asshole to us!"
BEASTS CASTLE PART WHATEVER
"I just realized Belle is a furry."
"This room gives me PTSD. I just remembered bitch face."
"Hello bitch. We never learn when to quit!"
He then tried the Marluxia fight.
"WHAT IS THAT? WHY DO I HAVE A TIMER? WHY IS THERE A HIT COUNTER! WHAT AM I SUPPOSED TO DO? HEAL IS POINTLESS IN THIS WHY DID I HEAR I DIDN'T MEAN TO HEAL- NONONONONO STAY AWAY YOU JUST STAY OVER THERE- NO NO NO FUCK GOD DAMN- WHY IS MY MAGIC TAKING SO DAMN LONG TO RECOVER NOOOO!!"
He died.
"We are coming back when we are much higher level."
"Now where has the asshole gone?"
"Worry not! I've defeated the monters-OH NO MORE MONSTERS."
"Mr.Steal-Yo-Girl, literally!"
"Technically he is out of your castle."
"Alright, let's fuckin' do this you Noctis wannabe."
"Wow this guys sucks."
He had to be saved by Mickey. The silence of concentration is strong with this one.
"Aww, nothing like a little murder to start a romance."
OLYMPUS COLISEUM AGAIN
"Have we tried this one yet? Was he a bitch? He's not gonna be as bad as Marluxia right? Right?" "I'm not saying anything." "Oh, he doesn't have that many health bar, comparatively."
He got meteored in the nerd realm, had to play guess who with the colours. Some commentary consisted of:
"What the fuck?"
"Shitshitshitshit."
"What is that?!"
"I'M TRYING TO HEAL."
"You think Hades would learn to stop hiring anime swordsmen by now."
"Hades, I kicked your ass before and I'll do it again."
"You're gonna fall into your well of souls and die, or get a powerup. Okay it's the later."
"Hey Auron we need protection, we do. -raises hand-  We need protection."
"Did we get a constellation. BITCH WE GOT CONSTELLATIONS! FUCK YEAH! We're the best!"
HALLOWEEN TOWN PART WHATEVER
"What, have you had Lock, Shock and Barrel be your assistaants?" "Yes, actually." "You IDIOT."
"Why do you still have that costume?"
"There it is, theres Goth Santa."
"These three are everything awful about children."
"THEY GET EACH OTHER OUT?! Oh I fffff..."
"Wait, we can beat up the children?"
"We're being invaded by hell monsters, I thought you should know."
"No, Jack it's what's inside- oh Santa's gonna be mad at you..."
"Did the Organization really konk Dr. Finklestien on the head and steal his thing?"
"Why is there a face on his crotch?"
"That ending was tooth-rottingly sweet."
AGRABAH PART WHATEVER
"Didn't we buy Jafar from that shady merchant?"
"He learned Misty Step- no, Dimension Door."
"WE WENT THOUGH SO MUCH EFFORT TO PUT HIM IN THE LAMP!"
Vexen Absent Silhouette
"Are you ready for Panic Episode 12?"
"Who dis bitch? I recognize him but I don't remember his name."
"Does he make clones of me?"
"He's doable."
To Jafar. "Maybe adjust your tactic? You've tried the same thing twice now and it hasn't worked."
"Did Organization XIII steal the lamp?"
PRIDE LANDS PART WHATEVER
"We're going back to the Pride Lands?" "Yeah." "You know what that means?"
"Yeah....."
"I really want a member of the Organization to show up just to be the only human in this world."
"Simba has literally no training on how to be a king. He doesn't know what people need! Do you think when he was out there for like ten years he was learning resource management? Macro economics?"
Deja Vu joke count has broken the number counter, and he moves exclusively by drifting now.
"Simba that's not a very kingly answer. Yes, you say yes, not 'I don't think so."
He then put the entire Hyena fight on hold to get that one hovering puzzle piece. It was only through a final act of self depreciation he finally jumped to it.
"Boss fight! He's very large."
HOLLOW BASTION PART WHATEVER
"Yuffie were you hiding? You're a ninja, you're supposed to hide to win!"
NOW IT TIME FOR POOHBEAR
The medicine is now whiskey and everyone is underage to drink it. How dare he.
"Is-Pooh's Astral Projecting!"
"That's me! Younger me! Past me! Previous me! Me in a past tense!"
"YAY AWW I like it. We're holding his hand. WE GOT A KEYBLADE!"
He got a Cosmic Ring. He then proceeded to act as if someone had given him a thousand dollars and hugged me.
"THIS IS SO WHOLESOME!"
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