#are her intentions pure

[axolotlclown]

We need to remember that Shubble stated that Wilbur would manipulate and gaslight friends and family. With this, we must be patient with streamers that were close to Wilbur. This was likely surprising and shocking for them. They may need time to come to terms with what has happened.

I have been vocal about how important it is for men to be critical about abusive behaviors. However, Wilbur had many close friends—some would even consider him family—and now they may feel they hardly knew him at all.

There is a deep stress felt by viewers. It is difficult to think we have given any amount of time or money to an abuser. Could you imagine a close friend right now? The pain and betrayal must sear. They need time to understand what has happened and come to terms with it. Many of them may not be live in the coming days (weeks even).

That being said, as time passes, criticism may be necessary. Complacency is not an option. Men that are willing to ignore abuse to protect an abuser are just as pathetic as the abusers themselves.

Let's give this situation time to breathe. I ask that we give patience and courtesy to those close to Wilbur at this time. But please do not forget that this happened. There may be a few streamers hoping to lay low and then drop a collab in a few months. Do not let them. This is too important.

#for now #the best thing we can do is spread awareness about abuse and offer support to domestic violence victims #i also want to add #that any previous art made about him was made with pure intentions #obviously its up to each individual to decide where the line is #but maybe lets not support him monetarily moving forward #that seems to be the move #anyway #please be kind to each other and give each other space #especially domestic violence survivors that may be here with us #and those who may have realized they were/are abused from shubbles story #i want to offer her and everyone around as much support as i can #if any domestic violence survivers have any stories they want to share #my dms and askbox are open #if anyone suspects that someone in their life may be abusing someone #this offer is open to you too #we need to talk about this #thoughts of dante #wilbur soot #shubble #im tagging this under shubble even though the post isnt really about her but i want the tags of this post to reach #whoever needs to read them

[shroudkeeper]

09. prompt / fair

An evening such as this makes me ponder if the heavens could hear the very pounding of my heart as it rejoices that I am chanced with another meeting with you, m'lady. Under starlight, and the tapestry of the night that offers us shelter, I come to you as I have mentioned in my last missive, for I will take leave soon and wish to see you.. one last time.

I know, I said I didn't want to say goodbye anymore, but this will be the last time, a temporary departure in order to fulfill a promise I made to you.

❝ She is not here.❞

Any elation I felt was depleted by the voice that echoed across from underneath the sway of the trees we admire in our solitude. There, among the statues where we once stood, under the sway of whispering willows, I found no evidence of you.

Instead, moonlight graced the scowl upon your father's features, and at his side, the hound we saved, one that was said to deliver my messages to you. Words suddenly failed me, turning to ash as I opened my mouth to speak, but before I could gather courage to say a word, his voice pierced into the space between us. I could not help but let my eyes wander to where his hand was resting.

He was armed.

❝ You must think me a fool, Mister Fitzgerald, and here I believed you would respect my wishes. Kami forfend that I believed you would listen. ❞

I could hear each breath escape me, ragged and shallow, as my eyes fell to the blade he wore. I knew well what he was capable of, what he may do to me, yet he did not brandish steel, rather made sure with his posture that I knew well of my place.

And I did not mean to question it.

My approach is a careful one, taken with languid steps forward and arms extended in his direction so he may see that I was unarmed and bore no ill intent.

"I have not done anything to sully her good name, I just --"

I couldn't finish my sentence, this ongoing, quiet rage within him, had grown and spread not an inferno, and from him came the flames of his rancor as the thunderous sound of his voice cemented my feet to the gravel path leading to him.

❝ Silence!

I told you to proceed with caution. You chose to disregard these words, throw caution to the winds and continue to defy me. I am aware of what takes place under my roof, and trust me when I say this: I humored this long enough, your fantasy of being with her ends here. ❞

His hand finally left the weapon at his hip to motion towards the dog at his side, the small courier who carried my confessions, my haiku, all of my planning, to you. It had been a well-crafted secret, but secrets had ways of being discovered.

How much had her father known? How long had he been aware?

"For that deceit, I will forever apologize profusely if you ask this of me. But, I won't apologize for what I feel for her, what I would do for her. That is something I will refuse to do." I couldn't stop myself as the emotions were roused within me.

Something inside me became undone, the seams that held these emotions back were ripped free. I had never spoken these words to another soul, but you know what I hold in my heart for you is true, and now, everyone else will know of it.

I am tired of denying myself. Of lying. Of hiding.

❝ Then do so in silence and leave her be. This is no request I make like before, a betrothed woman should be respected. For once, be an honorable person. ❞

And then something else broke inside me.

My own heart was delivered a severe blow, he may as well assailed me with his katana.

"..What? What do you mean.. --"

I am not sure what possessed me, what drove my legs to move forward when all I desired was the gravel to give out underneath me, but I marched to him and fell to my knees. The flurry of emotions crashed around me within an instant; suddenly, the beautiful hydrangeas lost their radiance and perfume, and the stars that I loved to share with you were extinguished one by one.

I wanted to call him a liar, but this was no deceit, those smoky greys gave an intense glare that spoke volumes of this truth. He nearly defeated me with this look, and perhaps this was his purpose, to shock me with this revelation. And he almost did, but I couldn't, I wouldn't simply let you go.

I have come this far. I have loved you this long in the shadows. I told you I would bear this with you.

And I will. I will earn a chance to walk side by side with you, under the sun.

❝ Go. Leave and forget her, so she could begin to forget you.❞

He shook me out of my reverie, but I needed an answer out of him, and when I spoke it, I saw something within his gaze shift into something morose even if his jaw had tightened and formed a severe contour.

"Does she know?"

❝ The personal ongoings of our clan is no concern to a foreigner, we have a business relationship, you are just the contact we have with the East Aldenard Trading Company, nothing more. ❞

And the truth was there, sewn between his words.

"How is that even fair to her!" I couldn't contain my resentment and felt my body tremble; I was not exclusively angry at the position I am in, but for you.

You ..who were unaware of it all.

❝ You want to speak of fairness, Mister Fitzgerald? You, who has manipulated her already for personal gain, who considered putting profit before her feelings? You whom she would risk all for and has to protect? Yet you could not muster the courage to do the same. ❞

I assumed there would be backlash to my question, that I was to be met with more waves of his ire. Yet the tone he used carries something far more somber than what one would expect.

❝ Assuming you never had children, then you would not know the overwhelming pain of seeing one pass, it is devastating. No parent should bury their child, they should be kept safe. I have failed at this before. I shall not repeat the same mistake again.

What is fair.. is giving someone I love dearly a chance to live. I am old now, and though I am proficient in swordsmanship, my body will eventually betray me. I need to have someone who will protect the one who protects others. But most importantly, to protect the other half of my heart from meeting an untimely demise.

How could I trust that task unto you, who has not shown me --❞

"I love her!" The words stumbled out of me that my head spun and my heart became naught but a deafening sound in my head. His lips gave part, and he may have spoken something, but I couldn't hear it. All I wanted was my bleeding heart to be seen, for once.

I love you. I love you.

I want to say these words to you without fear.

"I love her more than I could conceivably put into those letters you've read, more than I can proclaim to you right now! I know what she means to you, but understand that I would never wish to be a burden to her. What I feel is authentic, and for the months we have spent together, it has only made these feelings grow.

We both love her.."

His face softened then. He is your father after all, and despite how selfish we are as mortals, even I could understand what he must be feeling. He wants to protect you, to keep the flower of his clan from wilting, he wants to see you bloom in this cultivated garden.

❝ Mister Fitzgerald, I have made my choice.❞ I could hear the gravel shift underneath his footsteps, he meant to depart, but this was not to end this way, I will not allow it.

"..Give me a chance, just one I ask." He paused and I watched him take a deep breath before motioning for me to continue with a nod.

"I am willing to find a rare treasure, said to be in the Ruby Sea, that will grant her a voice, even if it is for a sun or a few bells. I want to give her an opportunity to tell you how much she loves you."

Perhaps me, too.

He did not disagree, and I took it as a positive sign that he would allow me this one chance to be a proper suitor.

And I do not mean to fail him, or you.

#ffxiv #ffxivwrite2023 #ffxivwrite #ffxiv writing #ffxiv screenshot #fusanosuke takahashi #hancock fitzgerald #also they are wearing blue for a reason: #Blue symbolizes all that is pure and transparent #in this case they are both being transparent about their intentions #and their hearts #and the love they have for her is pure

[chibishortdeath]

Ok weird opinion of mine I guess idk how to start posts aaaa

I think Simon’s “barbarian” design really works story and character wise.

Yeah, it’s silly and absolutely not historically accurate whatsoever, but it kinda makes sense in a certain weird way.

We know from Lament of Innocence and Dracula’s Curse that the Belmont family is generally on rough terms with the public. Leon gets his title taken away and, even though he gets his sword back at the end of the whole Walter situation as confirmed by how Belmonts onward have that sword, he’s still generally kinda shunned for going against the church’s wishes and the tail end of the crusades happening at the time. And Trevor is straight up banished from the country for fear of his strength. He’s much isolated from other people off in the house in the woods until he’s called to help fight against Dracula and gets some friends on the way.

And this kinda sets up the situation that the family was living in during Christopher’s time. The Belmonts are social outcasts; their existence is acknowledged, but they’re not really associated with or thought of very highly at this point. So, it wouldn’t be unlikely that they just wouldn’t really care for or be caught up with social expectations like fashion. When people are going to be wary of you regardless of what you do, why not dress however you want? Especially if you know no one’s going to do anything about it! Especially if it’s practical; the longer, looser sleeves and pant legs of the time would be restrictive in a combat/acrobatic context. So Christopher probably just wore whatever he wanted, and to be fair he doesn’t really seem to interact with anyone besides family very much.

First I wanna mention that I am completely aware that Simon was designed way before any of these other characters. But these characters are chronologically before him and can explain where he gets these design choices from in universe.

So, what about Simon then? Well, Simon has a lot of themes of wanting to be like his ancestors. Christopher is directly mentioned as someone he wonders he’ll ever compare to. Judgment shows him looking up to Trevor as well, and even though that game is of interesting canon status lol, it’s an example of that character element being used again. And this is reflected in his barbarian designs! The cape he wears in the manual drawings resembles the cape Trevor throws off in the opening of CV3. The general light armor and skimpy clothing is reflective of both some of Christopher and Trevor’s designs. The metal armor in Simon’s Quest being reminiscent in shape to Trevor’s on the CV3 box art. It just makes sense that Simon would be trying his damnedest to emulate the guys he’s been looking up and comparing himself to his whole life.

And the sudden transition from the barbarian look the family had for years to the more with the times fashion that Juste has makes a lot of sense considering Juste grew up in a time when the family was highly respected and in the middle of town, somewhere where keeping social expectations and appearances would be expected of him.

Idk if any of this makes sense, but aaaaaa random stream of an idea I guess. I like Simon getting to being weird and out of place for his time period and country lol. Also I’m not saying that other designs are bad!!! I like all of Simon’s game designs tbh, Ayami’s is really cool too and works for some of these points cause it’s also kinda barbarian esque but just in black and red, I’ve cosplayed it before lol. Yeah idk that’s it and I am sleepy goodnight—

#castlevania #castlevania games #text post #simon belmont #speculation post #analysis post #theory posting #I think???? #that’s the closest tags to what it is idk #I feel like Simon would’ve been genuinely unnerving in the 1600s lmao #Simon is really weird guy #shout out to Selena or whatever her name is in canon for being into that #I really genuinely don’t what to tag this #this is like purely me ranting about details of an NES game that might not even be intentional lol #but yippie!!! making ideas fit together with each other!!! #aaaaa I feel like the whole looking up to ancestors thing gets glazed over a lot #but it’s a neat character detail!!! #a personality trait!!! #a story significant thing!!! #asdgfkkdshfhkdhakslfhwja #okie byeeeeee

[fantasmagoriam]

Offers you some younger, angrier Nigen

#ffxiv #final fantasy xiv #wol #au ra #xaela #I got this hairstyle purely with an intention of making this younger nigen look #but ngl it's growing on me #I love these two little beady braids on the side especially it is very *her* #potential hairstyles change for dawntrail maybe?? #oc: nigen avagnar

[cuppajj]

Apparently my ideas for Starbright come at 1 am. I have an idea that her “healing powers” aren’t exactly just healing powers, but the power to either increase or reverse the regeneration of someone’s frame. So she can either give someone incredibly fast regenerative healing, or she can essentially inflict a condition where a part of them will begin to discolor and rot like her original Blight name. The latter power is incredibly dangerous because she can’t heal her own blight, and she was basically manipulated into using it a lot as her old self. Nowadays, she’s essentially lost that death touch ability and she couldn’t be happier about it, and she’s trying to do the same to the rest of her outlier ability. The more of her past self she scrubs away, the better

#tl;dr: she has regeneration and rot powers #her hypnotic ability is somewhere in between both but it purely influences the processor #wow you have so many powers Starbright. sure hope no one took advantage of you causing you to be treated like an object instead of an #actual person :) #cjj sayeth #starbright #edit; I’m running with the idea her hypnotic ability was actually acquired. but by what or whom #and was it with good intent? (no)

[forcedhesitation]

I finished act 2 again, but properly this time. and I cannot even begin to put into words how satisfying and beautiful all of that was. I loved act 2 the first time I played, but figuring out how to save the last light this time, properly completing halsin's quest, storming moonrise towers with jaheira and her harpers, seeing aylin reunite with isobel...all of it. I love it even more. and the beginning of act 3 feels all the more rewarding, having fixed my past errors.

#bg3 #bg3 spoilers #thoughts about media #that was. incredible. I can't believe I missed so much the first time I played. #but at least having messed up the first time gives me a greater appreciation for the full story. #I did the “lift the shadowcurse” quest SO assbackwards last time I missed like. 90% of halsin's act 2 dialogue. #he IS cute. I am just STUPID. and learned nothing from dunking on gale before- when that was ALSO my own colossal mistake. #jaheira also gets such a badass moment of glory if her harpers as still alive. if you lose last light like I did before... #...god the assault on moonrise feels so...depressing. I felt so fucking bad for her the first time I played. #but I thought that you couldn't save isobel! and that's just what was supposed to happen! fool was I! #oh and if your tav fails the perception check on mizora when she first sends wyll to rescue zariel's asset- HE renegotiates his contract! #which I like better? I like when the companions get to choose their own fate! I like wyll taking a stand for himself! it was awesome! #and well. if corydalis used his outrageous charisma stat to push mizora into giving wyll a funky new sword? that's just friendship <3 #the relationship between aylin and isobel is beautiful. I'm so happy that I replayed to save isobel. I much prefer seeing aylin happy :) #barcus. barcus. barcus. I want to criticise you but I'm in love with astarion so. can I really talk??? #well maybe /I/ can't. but corydalis is Aware and playing mental manipulation chess with astarion. out of pure intent. but still. #join our polycule barcus. please. we will treat you better. I promise <3333 #anyways. not ready for the buggiest part of the game again. but at least I know what's going on this time.

[faeriebabee]

something about how taryn was the one who knelt down by eva's deady body and begged her to wake up after madoc killed her and then when madoc stabbed jude a decade later, taryn was the one to kneel down by jude and tried to comfort her while stitching the wound close

#the way taryn goes from helpless bystander to an active but purely self-motivated character #to someone who recognizes her wrongs and tries help/protect ppl in her own way #and #the way that if jude didn’t have magic healing powers this trilogy could've started and ended with taryn crying over the body of loved one #who had been murdered by madoc #holly black was this intentional or am i just insane #taryn duarte #jude duarte #tfota #tqon

[annoying-shits-i-think-of]

Alex, at the Purgatory Hall for a sleepover : *watches as Luke go to cook something since it's his turn to cook* "Simeon, Raphael, can I ask you two something ?"

Simeon : "Of course !"

Solomon : *putting his cup down because he senses chaos*

Alex : *serious face on* "Why are most of the angels dressing like strippers ?"

Raphael : *choking on his tea*

Solomon :"Pffff-"

Simeon : "... It's for our wings."

Alex : "Bullshit ! I saw Lucifer in his angel form and he's the only one who doesn't have a sinful outfit ! So answer me ! Why do you dress more sinfully than a succubus ?"

Raphael : *about to end Alex's life*

Simeon : *sighing with closed eyes*

Solomon : *on the floor, laughing*

Luke : *enters the room to ask for help but senses Raphael's killing intent toward Alex* *to Simeon* "Is Alex in trouble ?"

Simeon : "Yes."

#obey me #obey me incorrect quotes #obey me mc #obey me simeon #obey me raphael #obey me solodeus #obey me luke #Alex's intention was pure #too bad her question wasn't #Diavolo has to deal with two death #Alex's and Solomon's #Thirteen doesn't know if she should be happy that Solomon is finally dead or not

[mmikmmik2]

I'm emo about Spiders Jeramie's mom... this woman gave everything she had for the sake of peace and love, and even when her poor undead brain was rotting into sludge she wouldn't let herself be turned into a weapon... she knocked out the combatants on the scene before stopping to talk to Jeramie but she didn't seriously hurt any of them, she only did any damage in Shugoddam because she was a disoriented giant stumbling into things, she fought back against God King-Ohger at first and snapped at Jeramie for one (1) sentence but then apologized and just stood there and let the final attack take her out... she kept begging Jeramie for help... she barely understood what was happening! but she knew she didn't want to hurt anyone! she hated to do that to her son but she needed his help to stop herself! What a woman. Even Karras of the stoic self-sacrifice kingdom didn't have as strong of a grip. Rest in peace, noble spider lady.

#some of her decisions were maybe not the greatest but she clearly had pure intentions and tried her best #you gotta respect that #kingohger spoilers

[hylianane]

hey OPLA if you want to pick another random supporting woman to give sudden romantic tension with Nami, like you did with Kaya, I’m just saying that Tashigi is right there. and that it would mean a lot to my heart

#namitash nation isnt so much a nation as a small village but i am happy to be here #giving Smoker and Tash more connections to the SHs is always good yknow could really help move their narrative forward if you catch my drif #and Nami. Deserves the fun cat and mouse dynamic with a hot marine lady with beautiful eyes #I also wanna see if the LA will touch on one of my favorite glossed over bits in Alabasta #that is that despite the Strawhats coming to love and care for Vivi- they only ever agreed to help her because Nami wanted cash #They did a GOOD and WONDERFUL THING with purely selfish intentions the entire way through. First to get money and then to help their friend #I wanna see that morality explored!!! Do they dwell on that kind of thing at all???? #fuck okay I’m done with the tags rant ummm #my post #one piece

[zoennes]

GELUKKIGE VERJAARDAG, ZOË LOOCKX 𒀭 15 FEBRUARI, 2003

#wtFOCK #Skam #Zoë Loockx #Veerle Dejaeger #Skam Daily #SkamverseDaily #I've made this in one afternoon that's why it looks so... #not good enough for Zoë's 20th birthday #I had so many quotes I wanted to use and scenes I needed to blend together and some didn't look the way I expected and ugh #however... here we have Zoë quotes x what people thought of her x what she thought of herself #when I see the despicable girls mocking her wanting to be 'perfect' x what she was always doing I actually laugh #it's ironic and I love it #mock awayyyyyyy #I'm gonna do like the poet when he had to define love: I'm not going to even try #Zoë is so important to me no writer making her do or say the most ooc thing would ever erase the amount of love I have for her #I love how pure she is #like... her intentions #she's not trying to look cool or do 'the right' thing because she's supposed to do it #she just genuinely cares about people and tries her best to not betray herself #she follows her fucking heart and she pays for it a lot of times but DAMN SHE TRIES #she's so fierce and so passionate and so unaware of how wonderful she is #I miss her like I'd miss a best friend I can't talk to anymore but I do talk to her you know #that's why I keep on writing fics because I hear them so clearly #they just have a lot to say #she's happy #she's not being written by a mad man anymore so things are going well now #and I really need to stop writing here and go to sleep #Zoë Loockx you're no accident #you're inspiring and loving and so so loved by yours truly #happy 20 to the babiest sweetest bestest blorbo I'll ever have

[fellhellion]

This part of the editorial from 2099 (pic sourced from this post) is so interesting to me because i don’t even think the idea of Miguel having these kinds of flaws is uninteresting or impossible, but I just personally would never have come to this conclusion just based on the text.

Like, when I personally look at how Miguel and Dana interact, I don’t see any indication that he emotionally condescends to having a relationship with her, when you’d think this strain of elitism should shine through in some part of their relationship at least initially in his arc.

I don’t look at Xina and Miguel’s interactions and interpret any sense him feeling threatened by her intelligence (even if we're just talking purely pre-spidermanning), when you’d think an element of that would be present, even in a flashback. He was a callous dickhead about the cheating explanation, but that alone without some corresponding behaviour to how he speaks to/treats Dana, even just as a flashback, just doesn’t offer the bridging piece to displaying what the authorial intent apparently was, at least for me.

Also, and by god we always come back to Dana’s writing being so damn lazy, but if Miguel - even if only at first - sought Dana out due to the emotional convenience she provided, what has prompted enough change that he is willing to bear and forgive actions like her seeking out the company of the man who drugged him when she wants to needle Miguel.

ALSO. PETER DAVID I AM SPEAKING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EAR RN. ITS VERY SILLY TO ME TO POINT OUT THE MISOGYNISTIC STREAK INTENDED IN MIGUEL’S ACTIONS HERE BUT THEN LITERALLY JUST NOT BOTHER TO MAKE THE WOMAN THIS IS ABOUT MAKE LIKE. SENSE WHEN YOU WROTE HER. OFFER NO EXPLORATION INTO WHAT HER ACTIONS SPEAK TO IN HER PERSON AND DELVE INTO WHAT CONTRADICTORY ACTS MIGHT TELL US ABOUT HER.

#'a component to miguel's cheating is misogynistic thinking' AND IS THE MISOGYNISTIC THINKING IN THE ROOM WITH US NOW #idk idk...i genuinely have no issue with grappling w this as a character flaw of his i just would never have come to this conclusion on my #own PURELY from how he treated dana and xina. absolute asshole move w how he spoke of the cheating intially to xina #but that alone just makes him an asshole. not someone who felt threatened by her intelligence and THATS the piece that i dont personally se #in the text. #not to mention. the way dana and miguel's relationship is tonally depicted just. speaks of some lvl of sincerity to me. miguel isn't an #overly physically affectionate person and the times he does display that are really interesting (holding Gabriel when the abuse was going o #holding Xina when she blamed herself for Dana's death etc etc) #and then you have the way he holds Dana when he accidentally hits her while hallucinating from the rapture. he calls her lover and honey. #they cuddle in the bath that one time together. he recognises he hasnt been spending enough time w her and went to invite her out because o #it. and yeah. some of these we can absolutely chalk up to the character development hes having at the same time due to spidermanning but #even BEFORE that its like. it feels tonally dissonant to even try read Dana's actions at face value because the narrative doesnt CARE #about them making sense as part of a coherent whole person who thinks and rationalises actions to achieve a certain outcome or satisfy a #desire. it doesnt CARE enough to give her that sadly and so youre just left like. what does this relationship mean to these two characters? #for one party in particular i genuinely have no idea. and i dont know what to infer is the reason for a change from the mentality outlined #as authorial intent. because i didnt get that impression in the first place. #tunes talks 2099 #tunes talks critical #long post

[tariah23]

They’ve finally arrested that woman for allowing her child to wax adult’s private areas/ working an 8hr shift + overtime.

#I’ve mentioned this before but I can understand the pure intentions behind the mother wanting to teach her daughter some life skills at #an #early age but the vagina waxing could’ve waited ☠️…. #until she was off age #you can just tell that these people do not think #regardless this whole incident was entirely inappropriate #to expose your very own child like this is :( #idk how old the ladies daughter even was but some people are saying 5 😭….. god #I feel like the 24 women who let this baby wax their private areas need to be found too because no way… #why would you as an adult feel comfortable allowing a baby to do that to you #like did no one question anything at all…….. #I don’t care if her mother was in the room with her this is still gross #rambling #she could easily have her daughter taken away from her #her license suspended #be slapped with some child sex crimes #it’s… #and child labor crimes as well #why even post that online in the first place #it wouldn’t have been that bad if she was just allowing her daughter to wax eyebrows or lips and armpits or whatever #and let her work with the mother for like an hr or 2 #not an entire 8+ hr shift what the hell

[wraith-caller]

vaguing

#sth really lazy and almost insulting about 'you ship 2 guys bc you hate women' #esp when the woman in question straight up murders one of the 2 characters i enjoy writing lol #and esp also when im not allowed to write said woman as anything other than a perfectly matronly receptacle for male sadness #or else that is also somehow misogyny #am i allowed to like women enough to make them interesting characters rather than the mommy the gamer bros never got #am i allowed to puke up my own trauma and neuroses through male characters so as to not see them inflicted on a woman ie me #so that i can see those things at a safe distance so that they become cathartic rather than another depressing rumination #what if you just said you dont like something instead of trying to make everything a value judgment about a persons moral integrity #what if ppl write the things they do for their own personal reasons and not bc they hate some marginalized group #i dont even hate fia but im not going to write her as anything other than cunning and manipulative and driven #every character in this game is some flavor of fucked up #and almost none of them have pure intentions #thats uh kind of the point in some ways #meh

[chronal-anomaly]

Thinking about this again and how adversive doctors are to Lena, truly. Some of the greatest scientists in the world are the ones willing to ignore boundaries and push ethics, and like any real world power, Overwatch too snapped them up. These are the same people that would be crowded around Lena, picking and prodding at the only know time traveller, at the girl who loved, at the golden child, each obsessed with how her discoveries could impact their field, their name. This wasn't limited to people like quantum physicists and surgeons, but also historians, anthropologists, psychologists. Lena could have - and did - have conversations with the greats of the past, and has pieces to finish the puzzle. They just need to get to them.

Consent was a fuzzy thing with wings, given under the distant buzz of sedatives and lacking complete understanding. It would help her, you see, help her improve, help her recover. Of course, major overwatch players like Jack and Angela wouldn't stand for it, but they couldn't be on guard all the time. And Oxton was under too many drugs to recognize what was happening.

One day, she broke, ripping IVs from her arms and pushing herself to her feet, before immediately falling to the ground, shouting unintelligibly about the beasts there to steal her blood again. Her already fragile mental state, decimated by being the their next project. After all, it wasn't until after this she was announced to be a part of the strike teams, and not simply locked away in an underground prison like the SCP she is. Their intentions were pure: get the information Lena held before it was lost forever in some containment cell.

What this has led to, though, is a deep rooted fear of doctors and anything medical that perseverates today. White coats, the smell of antiseptic, even being around the infirmary makes her hackles raise. If she's seeking medical help, she's on this side of dying because the panic attack it can trigger is not worth the bandaid - or life saving IV - she needs to get there. Given the choice, she'll prefer to find a field medic, or have her or a friend clean up the injury if possible. Field medics are less, well, sterile, and that soothes a lot of her stress.

#( ooc. ) #( headcanon. ) #sorry for the weird silence yall #blah blah life blah #but i habe a lot of muse and i have a lot of time rn where my brain is just occupied by her and my dnd character rn #anyway this is so spicy and i want a thread abt it so bad #( wishlist. ) #tosses something self indulgent in there ( like usual ) #also they were not acting with pure intentions but they believed they were #sacrifices eggs omlettes and all that #lena is not a person to them shes a Project #lil unreliable narrator moment ( my favorite thing )