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#as Louis would say. ‘It’s all part of the process.’
greedandenby · 9 months
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Jacob Anderson, Sam Reid, and others talking about Jam Reiderson.
Since promo might be scarce for season 2 (and also because i'm bored), I had fun compiling bits and pieces from interviews about these two men's beautiful friendship.
(Long post, so keep reading!
- there's SO MUCH good stuff)
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Pride.com
Q: You guys have incredible chemistry. It hinges on that. Can you talk a little bit about how you built that kind of connection?
JA: I find it so difficult to talk about chemistry. Because me and Sam… like each other.
SR: Yeah. I think we’re very similar in a lot of ways, and that was a big relief. It’s a very bizarre job to do when you’re doing it, cause you’re shooting entirely at night, you have amazing costumes and contact lenses and accents and teeth and blood. The scenes, while they feel like they have a flow to them, there’s a lot of splitting up while we do it because we’ve got to have special effects come in or the blood come in, or we’re on a rig of some kind. So it’s a weird experience, and we also had these extraordinary lines of dialogue to say as well. And so to have somebody who’s similar, can process these things the same way as you and bounce off of and decompress with is vital.
JA: Yeah, and the first step is you just have a common language that you find, and sometimes it clicks and sometimes it doesn’t. And we were just lucky that we, you know…
SR: Yeah. Yup.
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Amc.com
Q: The relationship between Louis and Lestat is rife with complications, but at its core there's obviously a real connection there. What was it like crafting this tumultuous relationship on screen with Sam Reid? You two are quite good friends having come out the other end of Season 1.
JA: Yeah, we were good friends when we were doing it and I think that's part of why it worked out for us! We didn't put too much emphasis on trying to figure everything out. The scripts are so beautiful, the writing is so dense and so full of life and detail that you don't need to discuss it too much. Obviously, we talked to the directors, and they'd have ideas and we'd have ideas, but I think, in terms of me and Sam finding it, I think we just paid attention to each other. We just trusted the writing, trusted each other, and it meant that we’d already be prepared for whatever was going to come up. We felt comfortable with each other, so we could try things and it felt safe. It felt like we could play around with body language and with eye contact and all these things. But it was unspoken, I think. It wasn't something that we spent a lot of time discussing. Everything's intentional to a certain extent, but there's this other thing that is just about instinct and listening really.
Q: And having the right scene partner where that happens.
JA: Yeah, I felt really lucky! Sam gives you so much. There's so much to play off and I hope that I did the same for him. Our first day of shooting we did the opera house stuff, and I was so excited. It's the scene where he talks about loneliness, and I remember thinking even though I'd got to know him a little bit and we'd done a bit of rehearsal and we'd become friends by that point, I was like, "Oh wow, this is going to be really special! I'm going to get to do this every day. I'm going to get to watch this character come to life and respond to it." That's a gift. Sam Reid is a gift!
Q: The relationship between Louis and Lestat is rife with complications, but at its core there’s a real connection there. What was it like crafting this tumultuous relationship on screen with Jacob Anderson? You two are quite good friends having come out the other side of Season 1 so if anything, I’m sure the experience brought you closer together? 
SR: Yeah, definitely. It definitely brought us closer together. It was really crazy this stuff that we were doing together. We'd have these massive scenes, and it would be just him and I in the middle of the night playing opposite each other, not really being able to see each other all the time with the contact lenses. You just rely so heavily on one another. You also rely on each other because you're like, "Have we pushed it too far? Is it too much? Is it enough? Like, do we believe each other?" Because it's this very intense relationship but we’re also supernatural beings. So, you're constantly having to reframe the way that you look at a relationship and say, "Well, hang on, my character has all this power." Like in Episode 4, I remember saying, when all the police are coming over to the house, I was like, "Why are we even worried about this? I don't understand why I would be even concerned about this at all." But you're negotiating with someone who's going, "Yeah, but my desire to have a connection to humanity makes this important," and so you're like, "Oh, okay." We managed to balance off each other in that way, because my character's way past any connection to humanity and Jacob's character is holding onto those last threads of his humanity. When we'd both be examining a scene, we'd both be coming at it from different angles. Because of the love between the two characters, there's always that negotiation and blunting of the other's real intention. I couldn't really imagine doing it with anybody else! We did all of it, everything, together, really.
Gold Derby Daniel Hart Interview
Q: In what ways does the show’s really rich visual palette and then of course Sam and Jacob’s lightning-in-a-bottle chemistry on screen influence some of the choices that you made on the score throughout your process?
DH: There’s a theme that I would call their love theme, and it’s sprinkled throughout the first episode but it played in full over the end credits in a piece called “In Throes of Increasing Wonder”. And that theme appears in almost every episode, I think, in some form or another. I don’t think that theme was possible before I had seen some of that interaction between Jacob and Sam as Lestat and Louis. It’s born of their emotional reactions to each other.
IWTV Podcast
Ep2
Q: You and Jacob did your chemistry tests over Zoom? Which, I mean, does anyone have chemistry over Zoom?
SR: Yeah, I don’t really know what they were looking for or how you’re supposed to gauge chemistry from that, because it was really glitchy and we were all speaking on top of each other and trying really hard to act into the camera, which just wasn’t working. But look, I really… Jacob is such a lovely person, such a really fantastic actor and so easy to be around. And I could see that he was going to be a very easy person to fall in love with. So it was fun. In fact I just came from having ice cream with Jacob and he says hello.
Q: Oh my God, I’m obsessed. I want these moments. Give me that footage, okay? I want ice cream footage, I want strolling the streets of downtown New Orleans footage.
SR (laughs): Yeah, I mean we hang out all the time and we’ve become very, very good friends. Cause it is a crazy journey that we’re on and it was a crazy job, so it’s really lovely to have such a good friend.
Ep3
Q: Talking about Sam, how much time did y’all get before you started actually shooting? It’s like “Okay, we’re in love now and it’s going to be very tortured and complicated” – Rolling!
JA: Yeah. I don’t know if I completely believe in luck, but I think there’s like a weird cosmic luck in this whole thing. It is a huge roll of the dice. The first day we met each other, obviously we both had our masks on, and we had a hug and we were like “Oh hi”. And then we just spent the next day walking around New Orleans and getting to know each other. And I truly love that man, so much. Like, we connected so quickly and just found like… And I think part of that as well is that there’s a level of trust that we had to have, otherwise we weren’t going to be able to do this at those hours, and those scenes, and the intimacy of their relationship, and also the toxicity and the fire in it. We had to really hold each other and be like “All right, have we got each other’s back?” And we did, we were just like “We’re in this together. Let’s listen to each other and try and have fun.” And we did, we had a lot of fun. I thought that taking on this role would be quite triggering for me in lots of different ways. I thought it was going to force me to have to reconcile with lots of feelings that I had. I thought it was going to be just a guilt and shame and despair fest for six months. And actually I just found it really, really cathartic being Louis, and Louis has helped me a lot. I think there’s something about acceptance in Louis and acceptance of self, and like “This is who I am, this is who I’ve been, and I’m enduring, I’m choosing to keep going. I’m choosing to accept who I am.” And that was really helpful for me. So rather than feeling tortured, I think I ended up just feeling very… held, very comforted by the whole thing, in a weird sort of way.
Ep7
Q: I’m wondering what you guys would do or how you would hang out on set. Is there hanging out or are you more like “Okay, they’re setting up a light, I gotta go lay down, I can’t with you right now.”
JA: No, we were pretty inseparable, to be fair. There wasn’t really any hanging out. We just were. At a certain point, we just were. We didn’t share a trailer, but it was like, a wall separating us. And we’d just end up sitting on the stairs or texting each other through the wall.
SR (laughs): Through the wall, just texting all the time.
JA: We became a hive mind.
SR: We did, yeah.
Q: Were you still a hive mind once you wrapped? Would you still text and stuff?
JA: Yeah.
SR: Yeah.
JA: We’re going to the theatre tonight. We’ve seen each other every day for the last week. We’re still choosing to spend time together. It’s probably not very healthy. Very co-dependent (laughs).
Ep8
Q: Obviously viewers are in love with Jacob and Sam. People are tweeting me photos of them eating ice cream. We call ourselves #icecreamhive. The fandom is strong. Can you tell me about how you found Jacob and Sam, and the process of deciding they were Louis and Lestat?
Rolin Jones: Well, obviously 9 billion people auditioned. You kind of get down to ten actors that you like on both sides. The simple math of it is the second those two got into their Zoom rooms together, it was very clear something very dynamic was happening. On Jacob’s side, there’s this sort of genuine warmth, kindness, humanity. You’re like “Okay, for a character who’s going to make a number of questionable choices, how do you make them want to love him?” And on Sam: I saw his face and I said “No fucking way! No fucking way that guy, this chiselled, stupid chiselled, with his locks and his dreamy eyes. I was like no, no, no, no. And then I pressed play, and he really knew how big we were going to go. He was wildly specific and subtle. It was in his voice. There was something a little Jeff Bridges/Starman about it, and I was like “Oh, this guy feels like an alien and he feels other than us”. They both won the audition, that’s basically what happened. Although I’ll tell you, here’s a dirty secret: ready for this? Sam bought this piece of technology, that you can do a push-in close-up right when the scene is getting a little juicy. And I just started laughing my ass off. I was like “Oh my God, this guy wants this so hard.”
Mark Johnson: You called me the first time you had seen Sam, and you were just so excited about the potential of this guy and you basically said: “He’s going to be next to impossible to beat.” And sure enough, nobody could really touch him. But from the very first time you saw his audition you were pretty convinced that we had our Lestat.
Keep It Podcast
JA: Sam is just like my… partner-in-crime, and I feel so lucky that I got to spend every day with him. We had to do a lot of stuff in this show and when I say a lot of stuff I mean, those nights are no joke. Knowing those scenes and working on those scenes together at that hour – you can only do that with somebody that you like, even if the scene calls for tension. I think you would just kill each other if you didn’t like each other.
PaleyFest
Q: Jacob and Sam, I feel like the show wouldn’t work unless the chemistry’s there between Louis and Lestat. There’s a lot riding on that. So how did you two form this immortal bond, if you will, during filming, knowing how important it was?
JA: We just spent a lot of time together even when we didn’t need to (laughs). I don’t know, like, how do you put that kind of thing into words? It’s just, like… I really love Sam. I like spending time with him. I like working with him. I find the way that we talk about what we’re doing… Well, we’re not talking about what we’re doing all the time but I think we have a similar language. I dunno, it’s ki(smet?)… It’s, like, how do you describe a vibe? (laughs)
Q: Sam, how do you describe the vibe?
SR: I think the work, the world and the characters are so extreme and it’s a very intense thing to do. And I think we leant on each other a lot throughout the process and we were very grateful for the friendship that we had built to be able to get through six months of night and some pretty intense scenes. And to have someone that you can look across the room and have a private giggle with and get on with the job and debrief with at the end of the day is invaluable. Chemistry with actors is a complicated beast because it is our job to manufacture it, but when you don’t have to and it just comes naturally it makes everything so much more easy and enjoyable, particularly when you’re nude and bleeding (laughs). You’re really happy you have a buddy (unintelligible).
Q: I was in the Entertainment Weekly suite when all you guys came through for Comic Con at the Hard Rock Hotel and, I mean, I was watching you all interact. Bailey, break it down for me: these two, do they have like a super-bromance going on? Like, what is happening?
Bailey Bass: They’re best friends! They really are, it’s really precious. (Delighted grin from Jacob) Look at Jacob’s face! (laughs)
JA: Are we best friends, Sam?
SR: Yeah, you’re my best friend.
Eric Bogosian: I have to say, I have to throw in: I have two sons who are roughly the age of these guys, and we all went over to Comic Con, us three. And walking around was like being with my kids. The two of them are just like together (clasps hands together) getting into everything and I’m following them around, like “Wait a second, wait a second! Let me catch up with you there!” I didn’t really get it when I first got to set, I didn’t understand what was going on with these two guys, because they were so happy and they were so tired and they were so bonded and I was like “What dimension have I entered here?”
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Rotten Tomatoes
About the casting process:
JA: I asked (Alan Taylor): “How did you guys decide that it was the right thing?” And he was like: “To be honest, by that point” – cause we did like eight rounds of auditions – “it was more about the way that you interacted when you weren’t doing the scenes. It was about how you listened to each other.” It’s just that we got on, we were pretty comfortable between the things.
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Schön magazine
Q: Tell me more about the dynamic between Jacob and you who plays Louis, your love interest?
SR: Jacob and I get on well, we have a close friendship. We bonded strongly throughout the making of this show. He’s one of my favourite scene partners I’ve ever had because it’s just such an easy working relationship. There’s a lot of trust between the two of us. You know, it’s a fucked up toxic relationship. It’s messed up. But at the core of it is like this intense, inescapable love. So, we have to play out a very morbid, obsessive, passionate relationship. I think it would be really hard to do if you hated the person opposite. I’m so grateful that we get on.
ScreenRant at SDCC 2022
Q: Louis and Lestat have an iconic relationship: epic, spanning years and continents, lives ruined, bloodshed. What is it like bringing that to the screen and working together to really establish that immortal bond?
JA: It’s been the greatest partnership – creative partnership – in my life.
SR: Awww.
JA: No, I’m not joking, it really has!
SR: I’d agree, actually. It’s very hard, it’s a very intense relationship that they have, and you have to believe in that relationship. The things they do to each other are so extreme and painful and hurtful. And it’s been fun to have a real buddy to go through that and debrief with at the end of the day.
JA: I’m not sure how we could’ve done everything that we’ve done if we didn’t really trust each other.
SR: Yeah, it would’ve been awful if we hated each other.
JA: And it’s one of the great… you know, in the books, when they join together again – even when you know how awful they’ve been to each other – it’s just like you’re home, and I think that’s something that we always subconsciously tried to make sure was in there. They are kind of like home to each other, particularly after Louis’ human attachments start to fall away.
Eric Bogosian: I just want to say, these two guys (pointing to Jacob and Sam), it’s great watching them, their bonding and everything. The only difference between them and the guys in the fictional world: I’ve never seen them fight.
Bailey Bass: They were walking together alongside the San Diego beach. (To Jacob and Sam) You were! I mean, how adorable is that?
JA: We’re quite co-dependent. I don’t know if that’s a problem (laughs).
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SDCC 2022 Panel
SR: It’s the greatest gift that I’ve ever been given, really. And then of course (pointing to Jacob) this guy.
JA: Awww!
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SDCC 2022 Press Conference
Eric Bogosian: As a witness to what was going on, watching the way these guys (pointing to JA & SR) interacted was amazing. They had a chemistry that I’ve actually never seen before, and it continues even as we’ve been here for Comic Con. It’s wonderful to watch. I won’t get into it too much, I don’t want to characterise what goes on between them, but there was a great feeling on our set.
TV Insider at SDCC
Q: The level of intimacy that you two have to establish early on is really impressive. Did you know each other? Did you get to spend time hanging out before you got to be these immortal entwined characters?
JA (to SR): What did we do? We had like one Facetime call…
SR: Yeah, we had a Facetime call and then we were texting. We texted a lot, so we go to know each other via text.
JA: Me and Sam talk to each other every day, by the way. We couldn’t cut the cord.
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TV Insider’s Trivia Night
SR & JA: Hi, we’re Jam Reiderson and we’re from Anne Rice’s Interview with the Vampire!
Holding up boards that say:
SR: [I won!]
JA: [But I won (really) at life]
SR: Bastard!
JA: Because I get to be with you, Sam, all the time! That’s the twist.
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TV I Say Podcast
JA: Me and Sam spent 40 minutes yesterday in a sticker shop. Like, just looking at stickers and buying stickers. That’s not a thing that you ever really talk about. You don’t go like “Are you into stickers?”, you know? (…) I feel like Sam and I end up mentioning things in passing like “Do you wanna go do this or do you wanna do this?” and the other person’s like “Yeah!” But then, we have… There are so many crossovers. You wouldn’t expect it because we grew up in very different ways in very different countries. But we have crossovers of weird things or very niche things that we’d never discussed, really, right up until the point of promoting this show and doing press, that we’re like, “Great!” Like we’re going to go to Universal today. And I thought “Oh, is it a bit of a weird thing to ask?” Like, I don’t know if it’s awkward to… Normally, I wouldn’t ask a friend if they just wanted to go to Universal. But with Sam, I’ll be like “Should we go to Universal Studios?”, and he’s like “Yeah! Let’s do it!” Do you know what I mean? It’s just, I dunno, we just have similarities that we couldn’t have really… We couldn’t have known that we were so similar, but it really helped us when we were working, even if we didn’t know it at the time.
Young Hollywood
JA: I don’t know, we just liked each other straight away. We just had similar thoughts about what this was, about what we were doing. He’s one of my favourite people I’ve ever met in my life, let alone worked with. We just work well together. I can’t even really pinpoint exactly why. We’re going to hang out now, like after this we’re going to go to the Grove…
Q: Oh he’s in LA?
JA: Yeah!
Q: Oh my God, that’s perfect! I was going to say when was the last time you talked to him?
JA: Like half an hour ago.
Q: What’s the best thing that came from IWTV for you?
JA: That’s hard to… Sam Reid. Let’s say Sam Reid.
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I'll add to this or do a part two if i find more and will be doing another for season 2 promo (if we get any).
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charliedawn · 22 days
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Hey this is some stupid fear I have but how would some slasher ( whoever you want. ) React to a nurse who is young like in 20s and isn't scared at dying at a young age or isn't scared of dying like any time, but it's scared to grow up? It's really a stupid fear I have personal.
P.S you don't need to do it tho.
( sorry for the bad Grammer, English is my second language. )
Pennywise:
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"Yeah. Growing up is scary, kid. I won’t lie to you. But, guess what ? It is part of the process." Pennywise hesitated before patting your head. "Cheer up. Being mortal isn’t all that bad. Living forever is a bore honestly."
Pennywise’s throat tightened as he realised that you would grow up. He knew it was a process and that in the blink of an eye…You would be gone. He waited a few seconds before surprising you by pulling you into a hug. Your eyes widened as you realised that he was shaking.
"Pennywise…" You uttered in a whisper before sighing and hugging him back.
He didn’t say anything. Truth was ? He was scared too. But, he didn’t want to tell you with words. So, he hugged you and hoped you’d understand that he was scared too…but that he was happy that whatever little life you had left, he’d be right next to you until the end.
Penny:
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Penny lost so many people in his life that he asked Pennywise to erase his memories of the people he used to love. When you shared your fears with him however, he tilted his head and seemed to ponder on it for a moment before shrugging.
"I could make you live forever. Would you be happier if I did ? Make you immortal ?"
You started thinking about it.
Living forever ? You smiled sadly and shook your head negatively.
"Thank you, Penny. But…I don’t think I would like to live forever. Life is meant to be precious…It is not meant to go on forever."
Penny tilted his head and looked puzzled, but he didn’t say anything. It was odd. He had never seen his life as precious when he was alive. But yours ? His jaw twitched slightly. Yours. He valued.
Vincent Sinclair:
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Vincent is an artist. He sees beauty in everything.
When he heard that you were scared of growing up, he just started taking as many pictures as he could of you and showed them to you. He then told you in sign language that you’d live forever—in his camera.
And that if you were scared ? Well, you just had to look at the photos and remember that that was how he would remember you forever. He then started stroking your hair and pressed his forehead against yours to calm you down.
Vincent knew he would eventually have to say goodbye.
But, to him ?
You would always remain a masterpiece.
Five Hargreeves:
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"Growing up is scary. But, being stuck as a child is even worse. Children never get heard. I would know. I was a child. Twice."
He said and looked down. So many years spent in solitude. So many years wasted. He lived for decades and yet, Five never thought that he was truly alive. He was feeling better with his siblings, but he never actually had any moment in his life that he could say that he felt like he was enough or enough. Sometimes, he even wondered if the world would have been better without him.
It was only when he was admitted in St Louis that he realised he wanted to be something more and make his life a good one. It wasn’t until he met…you.
He looked at you and smiled.
"You gave me a life. And even when you get older and start forgetting about how you changed everything for me, I’ll be there to remind you. Every single day."
Jason Voorhees:
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Jason never had a real childhood. He was bullied as a kid and his overprotective mother never allowed him to get out of her sight. When she died, he had no one to look after him and felt lost and lonely. He tried to reach out to people, but he could never create attachment with anyone.
So, he just kept killing and making sure people stayed away, because it was better than to get hurt.
And then, he met you.
He started caring for you more than he’d care to admit and soon enough, he wasn’t feeling as lonely anymore.
Jason *hugs you tightly*
Jason started looking up to you and even though he was also afraid of what will happen when you get too old to keep him company, he still wanted to keep you close to him—no matter how sad he would be once he would have to say goodbye.
Brahms Heelshire:
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Brahms looked at you and shook his head—as if he didn’t believe you.
"Y/N…Never going to grow old. Will stay young forever. Young forever with Brahms."
He hugged you and closed his eyes.
Deep down, he knew that you’d eventually grow old and disappear. But, in his mind ? You’d always be perfect. No matter how old you get or how afraid you get.
Brahms : "Don’t worry, Y/N. Brahms is here. Brahms will stay with you…"
He held back tears and just hugged you tighter.
Norman Bates:
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Norman: "…Darling. Listen to me. I am the oldest slasher to have ever existed. I was born in 1932. I am old. Very old. But…I would give up a whole eternity just to be with you. So, it is not about having a long life, but a good one. A worthy life. And just meeting you made mine worth it. And if I was to die tomorrow ? I can say…I lived a good life." He smiled and stroked your cheek affectionately with his forefinger. "You should do the same. Stop worrying about when your time is gonna run out or because of the few wrinkles on your face. Just remember to have fun and enjoy your life. Take the advice of a man who’s seen it all."
He then put down a tray on the table.
"Now, tea ?"
Jack Torrance:
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"Old ? Ah. Don’t you worry, sweetheart. You’ll be one hell of a cute old lady, if you get there." Jack never got the chance to grow old. He secretly misses being alive. He would have loved to grow old with his family and be a father to Danny. But, he never got there. He died—frozen and alone. He then came back as some sort of ghost who feeds on fear. So, no. Growing old isn’t something he would find scary, or losing you. Because he knows that when you do grow old and eventually leave this world, you will go to a nice place—unlike him. And if you don’t ? Well, you’d be trapped with him. Either way, he knows you’ll be alright. So, he isn’t worried.
"You’ll be fine. I know it. Now, stop worrying and come have a drink with me."
Hannibal Jr.:
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"You will always be a Hannibal in my eyes. No matter how old or wrinkled you get…You will always be my beloved daughter." Hannibal Jr. told you when you shared your fears with him. He stroked your cheeks and smiled. "Always."
You smiled at him and hugged him tightly. He returned your hug and whispered in your ear.
"You will always be part of this family." He then kissed your forehead. "No matter what."
Ghostface (Eddie Munson):
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"…Don’t worry. We will grow old together. It will be less lonely." Ghostface told you and smiled at you. Unlike the other slashers, Ghostface can grow old. He is not exactly a slasher. It is more of a multitude of people taking the role with time. Eddie won’t be Ghostface forever. Once his mission over, he will start growing old as well until he just gives his mask to someone new.
Ghostface *scoots closer to you and wraps an arm around your shoulders* : "I bet we will be the coolest old people ever…" *smiles*
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verysium · 3 months
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some hcs abt the bllk boys doing modeling shoots as pro-players? (like what they’d model for and the ways they captivate their audiences and stuff)? ty and love ur works btw 💞💞🫡
idk why but this ask made my brain freeze up and refuse to write anything for 3 days, so apologies if this is late anon:
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sae would be so done. i mean....he walked out on a literal interview, so what makes you think he won't walk out on a photoshoot? he probably hates the very idea of plastering his face all over billboards and magazines. but his manager said that he was in desperate need of good publicity, especially after that stunt he pulled with the last commercial endorsement. if sae was forced to model though, he'd definitely be as stiff as a board. no facial expressions whatsoever and always sticks to one pose. oftentimes, this involves him facing the wall and only showing half his face. if the photographer wants a full frontal, he's going to have to deal with sae's "i don't want to be here and i'm being held hostage" face. even if sae does try smiling, it looks more like a grimace. the only redeeming quality here is that he is good-looking. if you look at the official art, he doesn't even have to try to get all of you drooling over him. that face card does not decline. like ever. so the shoots usually wrap up pretty quickly because out of the 100 images taken, at least half are going to be usable. he's photogenic from any angle.
kaiser would strike a pose for everything, even his own mugshot. i picture him as that one johnny depp advertisement for dior sauvage. blue lighting. a silk blouse with the top button open to show off a sliver of his sculpted chest. his hair is slicked back with gel, and his knuckles are decorated with silver rings. the tattoo just pulls everything together. if not a perfume commercial, then i think he'd model for adidas or some other german brand (maybe even a beer company if he's old enough). i don't think he has any trouble with the actual modeling part of process. he knows how to flaunt himself. the only issue is that kaiser is a lazy perfectionist. he would show up late to the shoots and then stays even later just looking through the shots and choosing which ones to include. puts a lot of time and effort into things like this. after all, his image and his brand are important to him.
shidou would be sponsored by an energy drink brand. like red bull or monster. if not that, then axe body spray lol. as for modeling, i feel like he wouldn't be able to sit still. probably pulls out crazy poses that piss the photographers off on purpose. it always cracks me up how one of his first appearances in the manga is him being muzzled and restrained in a straitjacket inside blue lock's time-out zone. he's so chaotic. you would have to hold him down and shove the camera into his face to actually get a good shot. i also picture him wearing lots of black leather, maybe even silver jewelry (eg. studs, piercings). and of course, you can't forget the hot pink accents.
isagi would model for family-friendly brands. if not that, then just japanese brands in general. i imagine him doing skincare commercials for shiseido or maybe even participating in a campaign for UNIQLO. as for modeling, he would be awkward at first but then gradually get the hang of it. always thanks the team afterwards and is very mindful of the photographer's suggestions. everyone says he is a pleasure to work with.
rin would model for luxury watch brands like TAG heuer or IWC. maybe when he grows older and further develops his career, he might even become an ambassador for louis vuitton or bulgari. overall, his advertisements are very elegant and professional. only endorses high quality products. never looks at the shots afterwards because he hates looking at his own face. gets somewhat embarrassed when his mama points out his billboards and makes clippings of his magazine covers. he absolutely flipped when a brand suggested that he do a collaboration with his brother. so when this collaboration actually did take place, it was like a repeat of the whole messi-ronaldo photoshoot. they didn't actually meet on set. they were just photoshopped together into the same frame.
barou models for calvin klein. lots of denim and shirtless photos. all of the staff got nosebleeds, and his fanbase went wild when the issue was finally released. there's this one image his fans worship religiously where he's posing in his boxers and there's a clear shot of his abs and happy trail. (he's so hot wtf) there's also another shot that wasn't used cus a million people would've been deceased. he's standing there with his thumbs in the belt loops of his jeans and wearing nothing underneath his denim jacket. his hair is also down, and his skin is all sun-kissed and golden.
reo models streetwear, and this is canon because he has the drip. honestly, his duality needs to be studied because he can go from high class gentleman to bad boy who wears chains and knuckle rings. he'd try all different sorts of styles, and he'd look good doing it. out of all the bllk boys, i feel like reo gets the most sponsorship deals because of his versatility. he does the styling, hair, makeup, posing, editing, etc. honestly, they need to hire him as a creative director already. nagi would tag along behind the scenes, but he'd end up scrolling on his phone the entire day.
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stereax · 6 months
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Waivers: The Basics
Having noticed that many of my mutuals, as well as hockeyblr at large, are unsure of what exactly the NHL's waiver system means and how it works, I've endeavored to write up a little bit of a primer on waivers to make it easier to understand. Meet me under the cut to learn more!
What are waivers?
Put most simply, waivers are a process that occurs when a team says to a player, "We don't want you in the NHL anymore, we're sending you to the AHL". Because of the CBA's (Collective Bargaining Agreement) Article 13, before they can do this, they have to put the player on the waiver wire, which is essentially a 24-hour-long period where any other team that wants that player to play for them in the NHL can claim them. The purpose of the waiver wire is to ensure that teams don't unfairly stash NHL-caliber players in the AHL, thereby paying them lesser salaries (this is the most important part - AHL salaries are generally about a tenth of NHL salaries) and not allowing them to play NHL games. Players that may not be getting a fair shot on one team can move to another, where they can be used more effectively - for instance, Eeli Tolvanen was waived by Nashville, picked up by Seattle, and now plays a key role on Seattle's third line. In fact, he scored Seattle's first-ever goal in the playoffs!
What happens once a player is put on the waiver wire?
If another team claims the player, they are claimed on waivers and are transferred to the other team. Notably, the other team must have the appropriate cap and roster space necessary to claim the player. An example here is Kasperi Kapanen, who was placed on waivers by Pittsburgh and was claimed by St Louis. His cap hit of $3.2m may have been prohibitive for other teams who could have wanted to claim him.
If multiple teams try to claim the player, the player goes to the team that submitted a claim which is the worst in the standings - if it's before November 1st of a new season year, it goes to the team that finished worst in the standings the year before, but if it's after November 1st, it goes to the team that is currently worst in the standings. Take Lassi Thomson, who was placed on waivers by Ottawa and claimed by Anaheim. If, for example, Toronto also submitted a claim, they would not have been awarded Thomson, as Anaheim has the worse standing.
If no other team claims the player, they clear waivers. When they do so, they can be reassigned to the NHL team's affiliate AHL team. Notably, not everyone who clears waivers is immediately reassigned - a player who clears waivers can stay with the NHL team instead (for example, if another player just got injured). They can be sent down to the AHL at a later time - they do not have to go through the waivers process again if they have played less than 10 NHL games (cumulative) or been on the roster for less than 30 days (cumulative) from the last time they cleared waivers. This can be used to a savvy GM's advantage to avoid putting players on the waiver wire.
Why is everyone getting waived right now?
At the beginning of the preseason, every player with an NHL contract, whether it be one-way (NHL only) or two-way (NHL and AHL), is invited to that team's training camp. This places them on the NHL preseason roster for that team. As training camp goes on and players get cut, they then must pass through waivers to go to the AHL. Unless, of course, they're waiver exempt.
What is waiver exemption and why is it important?
So you might already have noticed an issue with the waiver system - it's terrible for younger players. If solely the waiver rules we've discussed above existed, every player being sent to the AHL would have to go through waivers. This would include prospects who are signed to an NHL ELC (entry-level contract) but didn't make the cut for the season. Obviously, this is bad for teams - imagine drafting players who you know will be good for you in 2 or 3 years and then losing them all to the waiver wire. This is why waiver exemption exists.
Waiver exemption, to keep it simple, is a protection that certain players have that means they do not have to go through the waivers process to be reassigned to the AHL. The specific details of waiver exemption are a little complicated - let's take a look at the table to make it make more sense.
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This table is either/or and is defined by the age when their NHL ELC was signed. A skater who signed their ELC as an 18-year-old is waiver exempt for either 5 years or 160 games played (including playoff games) at the NHL level. A skater who signed at 21 is exempt for either 3 years or 80 NHL games. Goalies have different requirements than skaters because they generally take longer to develop and don't play as many games.
There is a fairly common misconception that all players on their ELCs are automatically waiver exempt. This is false. The second a player hits the amount of games played for their age, they are immediately no longer waiver exempt. Usually, this doesn't occur until after the ELC is over, as most ELC players deal with injuries and healthy scratches, as well as not generally being given the reins to play on the NHL roster for the entire season. One notable example that disproves the "ELC means waiver exempt" conception is Dawson Mercer from New Jersey. Mercer signed his ELC as a 19-year-old in December of 2020. He has played all 82 games in the past 2 seasons (2021-22 & 2022-23) plus 12 playoff games for a total of 176 NHL games played. Under the games requirements, he is now no longer exempt from waivers, despite having one whole year left on his ELC.
For the 25+ category, upon playing a single NHL game, the player is waiver exempt for that entire season and that entire season only. Andrei Kuzmenko from Vancouver is a good example of that - last season, he signed his one-year ELC with Vancouver as a 27-year-old and could have been sent to the AHL at any time without going through waivers. (He was not, needless to say.)
There is one very important exception to the table: if an 18- or 19-year-old player plays 11 or more games with an NHL team in a single season, their waiver exemption is automatically cropped. For that season, and the next two, the player is waiver exempt, but after that, they are no longer exempt. This extends to the next three if the player in question is a goalie and not a skater. (To make it easier to understand, it's as if they jumped into the 20-year-old category.) However, 18- and 19-year-old prospects generally only play 9 games maximum at the NHL level in order to allow for the entry-level slide, allowing the contract to "slide" forward a year, letting teams keep the player on the ELC for an extra year and thus save money.
Are there any other ways a player can play in the AHL without going through waivers or being waiver exempt?
Yes, actually! There are two main exceptions - they're for conditioning loans.
First, what is a conditioning loan? A conditioning loan is a short-term reassignment to the AHL. There are two types of conditioning loans: the standard conditioning loan and the LTIR conditioning loan.
A standard conditioning loan, specified under the CBA 13.8, occurs when a player agrees to head down to the AHL for a few games to "wipe off the dust" on their game, so to speak. They're often used by players who have ended up as perennial healthy scratches on their NHL teams, so that they're able to jump in if there's an injury or other issue. Standard conditioning loans can last up to 14 days. One example of a standard conditioning loan is Shane Wright, who was sent to the AHL by Seattle very early in the season for conditioning, partially to bypass the requirement that the NHL has with the major junior CHL that would have required him to go back to the CHL were he officially reassigned from Seattle. Another is Nathan Beaulieu, who was sent to the AHL by Anaheim in January for a four-game stint.
An LTIR conditioning loan, specified under the CBA 13.9, occurs when a player coming off of LTIR agrees to head down to the AHL for a few games to "wipe off the dust" on their game, so to speak. These loans can only last 6 days or 3 games, whichever comes later, and the idea is to be able to figure out whether a player is able to return to form or requires more time to heal properly. For example, Travis Dermott was sent to the AHL by Vancouver in December to evaluate whether he was back to form after a concussion sustained in the preseason. He played one game in the AHL, then drew back into Vancouver's lineup for eleven games before going back on IR for the rest of the season due to the concussion repercussions. Notably, a team can only use one LTIR conditioning loan for each time a player is on LTIR.
What is emergency recall and why does it make a player waiver exempt?
Emergency recall occurs when a player on a team's NHL lineup is injured and the team can no longer ice a full squad because of it. (As a reminder, each team must carry 12 forwards, 6 defensemen, and 2 goalies. Usually, teams keep an extra forward and defenseman around as a healthy scratch in case of injuries, but some teams are pressed against the cap and cannot carry extra players.) In this case, they can call an AHL player (or multiple, at times) up on an "emergency" basis to fill in during the time that the NHL player is out. Once the NHL player is healthy again, the AHL player can either be transferred to a regular recall or gets sent down to their AHL team again. One example here is Akira Schmid, who was bouncing back and forth between Utica and New Jersey on emergency recalls every few weeks because Mackenzie Blackwood, one of New Jersey's two goaltenders, was constantly getting hurt.
It makes sense, then, why emergency recall would grant a player temporary waiver exemption status - it would be awful to have to recall a player from the AHL, have them in the NHL for a little bit, and then have to send them through waivers and get claimed when your roster player is healthy. However, if an emergency recall player plays in at least 10 NHL games, he loses his waiver exempt status under emergency recall (other forms of waiver exemption still apply).
What are unconditional waivers?
Unconditional waivers are different from regular waivers in what they do. Passing through unconditional waivers does not send you to the AHL. Instead, they are used by teams that want to buy out or terminate players' contracts, completely giving up their rights to the players. Players placed on unconditional waivers are almost never claimed because of this - only two players have ever been claimed off unconditional waivers.
Okay, hold on - what's the difference between a buyout and a termination?
A termination occurs when a player's contract is terminated. The player severs all ties to a team and does not continue to be paid by the team. The team does not incur any cap penalties from termination. There are two main types of termination.
The first type of termination is mutually-agreed-upon termination. In the case of Filip Zadina, who was recently terminated by Detroit, he made it clear that he would refuse to report to the AHL after being sent down on regular waivers. The team and Zadina then proceeded to terminate the contract so that Zadina would be free to negotiate a contract with another NHL team instead of playing for Detroit's AHL team, and so that Detroit would not incur any cap penalties from buying out Zadina. Another example is Lukas Sedlak, whose contract was terminated by Philadelphia when he made it clear to the team that he wanted to return to Europe to play. Philadelphia put Sedlak on unconditional waivers, terminated the contract, and Sedlak soon returned to his native Czechia to play for Pardubice.
The other, rarer type of termination is for material breach. Material breach termination is exemplified by Alex Galchenyuk, whose contract was terminated by Arizona after they became aware of the intoxicated driving incident involving Galchenyuk. Essentially, material breach is used when players are acting illegally, either against the law of the United States/Canada, or against the terms of their contract. The reason these terminations are so rare is twofold: Not only are hockey players generally going to try to avoid breaking the law, when they do, the player's association is usually going to investigate and file appeals and the like to try to secure their players the highest possible settlement despite the termination (and set a precedent so other teams are not encouraged to terminate contracts for material breach).
On the other hand, a buyout occurs when a player is released by a team, but the player continues to be paid by the team as per their contract. The team incurs cap penalties from buyouts - 1/3 of the contract value if the player is younger than 26 at the time of the buy-out, 2/3 of the value if the player is 26 or order. This penalty is spread across double the years left on the contract.
An aside - this is also where the idea of a "buyout-proof" contract comes in. A buyout-proof contract contains most of the salary being paid in the form of signing bonuses, which are paid in full even if the contract is bought out. (These contracts are also considered "lockout-proof", as, again, the signing bonus must be paid even if there is a lockout and no hockey is being played.) As an example of this, take a look at Auston Matthews's extension:
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If the Leafs try to buy this contract out, they'd have to pay Matthews the entirety of the signing bonuses as well as 2/3 of the base salary, making the cap savings incredibly marginal and just not worth it to buy out. Thus, it's buyout-proof.
Is that everything I need to know about waivers?
I think so! If you have any other questions, please drop me a line in my inbox or via DMs - I'll be happy to explain more to you! :D
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Hi! This is a fic rec of my favorite Exes to Lovers fics. These fics are organized by word count from longest to shortest. You can view my other fic recs here. Enjoy!
Given A Chance by fabby / @fabby1d (173k)
Five years after One Direction took their last tour, the last thing Louis Tomlinson ever expected to happen while on a tea run at the local Piggly Wiggly was to run into his ex-boyfriend and ex-bandmate Harry Styles.
The odds of them ever running into each other again had to be super slim, right?
Wrong.
What happens when you mix ex-boyfriends with a large serving of Small Town America? Will Louis and Harry be able to set aside their differences, or will Louis be able to stay breezy as fuck in the wake of Harry’s arrival?
(or, the one where Louis and Harry run into each other five years after One Direction ends and learn how to love each other again. Featuring: Reggie as the overweight labrador, Niall as Louis’ last grip on reality, and Nowheresville, North Carolina as the setting for Louis’ worst nightmare to come true.)
Empty Skies  by green_feelings / @greenfeelings (134k)
For three years, Harry has been running from his past. Now, he is moving to London and pledges to fulfil his only dream – making it big in the music industry. Not everyone has a place, though, and the competition is tough. As is his past catching up on him.Louis is part of the biggest boy band of the world, and getting there had meant a lot of hard work, as well as sacrificing parts of his heart and soul. He’s still happy. Maybe not as happy as he could be, but who is he to complain?
After All These Yearsby LifeInAColorWheel (127k)
It’s been seven years since One Direction went on hiatus and it’s been eight years since Louis and Harry broke up. They’ve been strangers to one another since then.
But, over the course of a weeklong boys’ trip, history between Harry and Louis resurfaces.
Or,
The one when Louis and Harry don’t talk, connect again years later, and reflect on why their love collapsed.
Bitter Tangerine by purpledaisy / @daisyharry (119k)
Maybe it’s Niall, he reasons to calm his storming heart. Maybe he’s not actually gone for the holidays yet, maybe Harry got the dates confused. Slowly, he holds his breath and pushes the kitchen door open. The first thing he sees make him jump, a wooden spoon held out like a sword. Once his brain processes the sight in front of him, it’s less the sword that gets him than who is attached to the wooden spoon.
“Harry,” the swordsmen speaks before Harry can, his voice low and steady though confusion laces each word.
Harry’s breath catches. Every string around his heart, all the protection he spent nine months building, rips out and tears open all at once as he says, “Hi Louis.”
-
AU: Nine months after they break up, a twist of fate brings Harry and Louis back together at Christmas.
Burn to Ash by bethaboo (116k)
Harry is sitting there, so fucking casual, and Louis realizes in a split second he was not ready. When Harry walked out in Detroit and never looked back, he was a boy verging on a man, still only twenty years old, but there's a man in his place now. Hard and resolute, yes, but still, for the first time in a long time, Louis can kind of see the old Harry in him. The soft, directness of his gaze, the hesitant smile he gives to Lou, the way he wrings his ridiculously large hands in his lap.
He's a little bit the eager sixteen year old puppy dog again, his innocence and sweetness resurrected miraculously, and Louis freezes in place. He was prepared to face the asshole Harry. He was prepared to meet a whole new Harry.
Louis is not prepared to meet one of the old incarnations of Harry, and it absolutely tears him up.
Or the fic where Harry spirals out of control, the band breaks up, and then he shows back up, five years later.
Mine Would Be You by crinkle-eyed-boo / @crinkle-eyed-boo (114k)
Louis blinks his eyes open, his eyelids fluttering as the room swims around him. He takes several gulps of beer once he confirms that he’s definitely not hallucinating, that the very first portrait Harry Styles ever painted of him is hanging on that wall.
Louis stares at the wall, his heart jackrabbiting in his chest as he realizes that there’s not just one painting of him, there’s five, the portraits lined up like they’re some sort of storyboard depicting the rise and fall of his deepest love. His greatest heartache. A pain that cut him so deep that he left the fucking country, severing all ties with his life in New York, now suddenly surrounding him as if he’d never left.
Fucking shit motherfucker fuck.
Louis returns to New York City five years after he left it – and the love of his life – behind. He didn’t intend to see Harry again, but fate has a funny way of pulling them together, whether they like it or not. After making a begrudging truce, they both start to wonder: Would it be so bad if history repeated itself?
Emperor's New Clothes by sunsetmog / @magicalrocketships (92K)
The fact that Louis’s most precious belonging was a cat with a face like thunder and an uncanny ability to cover every single inch of Louis’s clothing with cat hair was something that Louis chose not to think about too much.
or: Harry’s a pop star and Louis isn’t, and there’s a non-disclosure agreement where there used to be a relationship.
Perfect Storm by cherrystreet / @cherrystreet (80k)
What do you do when your best friend asks you and your (now) ex to be the best men at his destination wedding? You can either tell him the truth, tell him you’re not together anymore, and deal with the consequences, or you can pretend you’re still together and roll with it, just pray you don’t spiral. Fake it ‘til you make it. You know, for the sake of the wedding.
Harry and Louis choose the latter.
The Stars Are Guiding Me Back by coffeelouis / @coffeelouis (80k)
Directing the first ever season of The Bachelor with a bisexual star is a huge career move for Louis. After throwing himself into his career, he finally has the opportunity to prove himself as a director with a unique vision.
For Harry, being cast as the first ever Bi Bachelor means finally putting his ex-boyfriend behind him and starting anew. He's taking a chance on finding love and determined to do it right this time.
They didn't exactly think this through.
[or, the BACHELOR AU where Louis directs his ex-boyfriend Harry in his season as America's first bi bachelor.]
Consequences by allwaswell16 / @allwaswell16 (78k)
Two years ago Harry let his powerful family come between him and the love of his life, something he deeply regrets. Louis has tried to move on from their devastating break up. Sometimes, he even thinks he has. It only takes one moment to freeze them back in time.
An amnesia au
To the Ends of the Earth by stylinsoncity / @aliensingucci (68k)
During a yearlong hiatus, Louis visits Harry at his cabin in Idaho, where long-buried feelings ignite like the fire keeping them warm.
Your Memory Over Me by shimmeringevil / @shimmeringevil (64k)
Three years have passed since Louis last saw him, but all it took was a few minutes in Harry’s presence for him to be relegated to the desperate twenty-one year old that was practically begging his boyfriend for an ounce of reassurance that he still cared about him.
Harry shouldn’t be here. He’s brought too many unresolved feelings with him, that Louis thought he’d never have to face.
It’s Harry’s apparent apathy that’s the most difficult to come to terms with. Anger, he could handle. Regret, he would welcome. But Harry’s amiability, and carefree demeanor can only be born from indifference.
He’s moved on. He doesn’t care. And that is something Louis doesn’t think he’ll ever be strong enough to face.
-
OR - The worst heartbreak of Louis’ life walks right back into it when his parents invite their family friends on an all-expenses-paid trip for their twenty-fifth wedding anniversary. Facing a past that he tried to bury long ago, Louis learns that some people have a way of sticking with you even when they’re gone.
Far Away. by dimpled_halo (57k)
Harry swallows hard, clearing his throat. “Hi Lou,” he says, looking at Louis reluctantly. He’s even more gorgeous than he remembers, so much, he feels uneasy looking directly at him, he’s so beautiful.Louis looks at Harry, does a quick once-over and smiles, eyes so bright and blue—just how Harry remembers. “Harold!” He gets up out of his seat and embraces him into a warm hug. It’s a friendly platonic hug; one that ends way too soon. Harry wishes it would last longer so that he can breathe Louis in and memorize his new but somehow still familiar scent. It instantly leaves his body aching for more.
 **** Harry returns to London after five years. Stuck in the past with "what ifs" and "what might have beens", he sees that his friends and ex (and possible love of his life) Louis have all moved on with their lives while he finds himself questioning his own life choices, past and present.
I Was Yours (I Wish You Were Mine) by staybeautiful / @harruandlou 56k)
“Harry Styles!”
His name rang out clear through the city streets. He turned quickly back to the bar, startled by his own name and startled by the voice that called him.
Standing in the doorway to the bar, back lit and glowing slightly was Louis.
Not an eighteen year old apparition dressed in the same low slung blue jeans and t-shirt with swooping bangs that was always the image in his mind. No, he was Louis now.
or Ten years ago Harry dropped his best friend and high school boyfriend off at the train station and never saw him again. Now, he's twenty seven, living in NYC, and dreadfully unlucky in love. He can't stop wistfully thinking of Louis promising that they'd see each other again in ten years time. A chance meeting outside a bar has them tumbling head first into a summer of music, milkshakes, and maybe each other.
You Taught Me How To Love (You Taught Me How To Stop) by devilinmybrain / @thedevilinmybrain (50k)
“I was always better at hand to hand than you,” Harry growls, even as he leans his weight into the blade. It’s small, sharp, has a handle of gold roses.
“I don’t know about that.” Louis moves his arm forward, makes the presence of the barrel of the gun fit snugly to Harry’s hip. “I think we just play differently.”
“You going to shoot me?” Harry asks, those wild eyes tracking over Louis’ face. “Do it.”
“I think I’ve put enough scars on you,” Louis answers, means it about the stretch marks still lining the sides of Harry’s stomach, but it lands a little too raw. There are other scars on Harry’s body that Louis blames himself for, scars inside too.
No One Does It Better by nodibs (49k)
Harry’s an alcoholic and Louis is a bartender. The first time they meet isn’t the first time they’ve met.
Drifting, Weightless by dinosaursmate / @dinosaursmate (45k)
“We’ve been asked to do a gig,” Niall said slowly. “Harry and Liam are completely up for it, I am too.” “Alright. What’s the catch?” Louis asked with suspicion. “It’s, um…” Niall cleared his throat. “So, Juliana was contacted by this themed cruise company, and they want us to do a four-day One Direction cruise.” The words hung in the air as Louis’ right eyebrow slowly crept up and he fixed Niall with a stare. “Absolutely not.” Louis rolled his eyes. “You’re essentially asking me to go on a working holiday with my ex. Stranded on a boat in the ocean for four days.” “Cruise ships are huge! You don’t have to see him in your down time.” --- Harry and Louis are exes with benefits until they're not, and the Mediterranean Sea might just be the perfect place to work through some unresolved issues.
Bloodsport by tofiveohfive / @tofiveohfive (40k)
“You know how our next game is against the Cardinals, right? You remember how vicious those guys can get. I wanted us to come up with some plays, maybe work on a block from the left—”
Louis stops when he hears a chuckle.
He doesn’t think he’s said anything particularly funny, so he turns to Harry, waiting for an explanation.
“‘S funny, ‘s all.” Harry throws his finished bottle somewhere near the other discarded ones. “This is the first time you’re talking to me in eight months, and it’s still about football.”
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colormepurplex2 · 1 year
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Make You Mine | Purple Silk
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↳  Alpha Jungkook x Omega f.Reader ⤜ Enemies/Lovers ⤜ Rating: MA 🔞 ⤜ WC: 3,544 ⚠️  Angst, Omega presenting, mostly plot and setting the scene
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"How many times are you going to bring up the eastern territory lines? My answer is still no." Roland, your pack leader, crosses his muscle-banded arms across his chest. "We have enough trouble from the Jeons without trying to shift the claim lines again. I don't care what that musty old map shows, we keep to this side of the river and that's that."
You clamp your mouth shut, fighting the urge to argue again. Are all alpha's this ignorant or just the one leading your pack? You snuff out that thought before it can be read on your face. It's not fair that the Jeon family keeps pushing their claim further onto your family's land. Over the last five years, they've taken almost 100 acres along the river and Roland doesn't seem to give a shit. It makes you hot under the collar.
"Sir, can we move on to the import tariffs from the north? They're increasing again, the fields haven't been producing the way they should so we're relying more on those goods," your father, a well-to-do beta and Rolands second, speaks up from where he's seated across from you at the large oak conference table. It makes your stomach sour how they can move on so quickly from such an important topic. Sweat pops up along your brow, you scrub it away and sneer at the shine on the back of your hand. The leather jacket you're wearing slides quickly down your arms as you shrug out of it.
"Aye, so the reports say." Roland nods then unwinds his large arms to gesture to the man seated beside your father. "Lou, what's going on in the fields?"
Louis, beta and second to your father, shuffles some papers on the table in front of him. "It's not good, Ro. We think the soils are not turning over the way they should. Not enough water coming up through the ground well. It could take us another season, maybe two, before we can get it back to where we need it to produce for the family." By family, he means your pack. It's not really a family like some would think. It's not a set of parents and their children. It's more like several of those kinds of family units joined together. You're not all blood-related, nor even by marriage for that matter. Family, as you know it, is a choice.
You're part of Roland's family because your great-great-grandfather joined Roland's great grandfather's pack. The only reason you'd ever leave the family is if you were cast out or if by some miracle you find a soulmate. That idea makes you snort to yourself. Yeah, right. Already approaching your late twenties, you're starting to consider maybe you're just a really fucked up anomaly when it comes to designations. Most of your kind present just into their early twenties. It's unheard of for someone your age to not know where they fit in the hierarchy. Even if you were to present tomorrow, not everyone gets a soulmate, you have to be extra special for that. No, you're pretty sure that's off the table for you. Speaking of table...
"-this time next year, if we're lucky it won't be th-" Lou is speaking again, explaining to Roland the best process to roll over the vegetable fields.
The smack of your palm hitting the polished wood surface of the table cuts him off. You're not normally this hostile, but this is just an itch you can't seem to scratch. All eyes go to you, narrowing. You know you're being a bit hot-headed, but honestly, why can't they just fucking listen to you? You ask as much. "Why can't you see the obvious fix to this issue?" You lurch out of your chair, the back of your knees knocking it so hard it almost topples. "That land, the land you refuse to acknowledge as being taken from us, is fertile. We grew plenty there before the Jeon's snatched it up. It's close enough to the river that the irrigation possibilities alone would make it worth it. Stop being such a...a-...being such a..." You swallow hard, throat suddenly parched. Black spots pop up in your vision, the maps go out of focus before you on the table. "If you wo-would j-jus-st," the words slur from your mouth.
Why is it so hot in here? You tug at the collar of your shirt, willing some air past the fabric to cool your heated skin. A hand clamps hard on your shoulder, a blurred face looms before yours. You can faintly hear your name being called, sounding miles away. Words, drifting in and out like they're caught in a swirling wind, come just close enough that you can snatch a few here and there.
Okay?
Towel
Ice
Presenting
No. This can't be happening right now. You shake your head sharply from side to side to dispel the absurdity, but it only proves to worsen the ache settling behind your eyes. There isn't enough oxygen in the room, your lungs don't want to fully expand. You're hyperventilating. "Hot," you manage to croak out, staggering back from the hand on your shoulder. The last thing you want is to be touched right now. Everything burns. Somehow you've ended up on your knees, clutching your head in your hands.
"Sweetie," the voice of your mother is like aloe against the pain. "Shh," she coos softly.
"Mom," you whimper, dropping your hands and trying to lift your head to seek her out.
She's kneeling beside you, her graying hair spilling over her shoulder as she leans forward. "It's okay, sweetie, it'll pass soon." You reach out trembling hands, needing her comfort. "Not right now, we have to wait for it to pass," she murmurs brokenly. Part of her aches with you, knowing what you're experiencing. Presenting for a female is different than it is for a male. Biology, always giving someone the short end of the stick. "Just lay down, like that, good." Her constant praise and gentle words keep you grounded.
You slump down onto the cool tile floor of the conference room. Your shirt clings to you, sweat-soaked and uncomfortable. "Hurts," you whine. Everything hurts. You roll onto your side, curling in on yourself. Everything in your abdomen cramps up, a powerful force that makes you whimper low in your throat.
"Here, the ice and towel," it's the voice of your dad. He sounds so concerned, you want to go to him, tell him it's okay. Another wave of nausea steals your breath before you can even begin to form words of comfort.
A sudden coolness is pressed to your brow. The smallest bit of relief in the inferno that is consuming you. "Why is it taking so long?" The voice of your pack alpha is brisk, borderline brutish, and laced with...something, something new, something you've never heard before.
"Ro, sometimes these things take time. There's never been someone presenting as late as she is, it could just be her body working harder to adjust." Again, your mother's words soothe you. Your mother is what many would call a den mother of sorts. She takes care of everyone. Though she isn't an alpha, she sure as hell can act like it sometimes, commanding those around her with just a look. Even Roland won't challenge your mother most of the time. Usually, it's the pack omega's place to be in charge like that. However, after Roland's wife and soulmate, your family's most recent pack omega, passed away a few years ago, your mother fell into the role until another alpha, and their soulmate, take Roland's place.
"What's that smell?" Louis sniffs the air, wrinkling his nose. "It's way too sweet."
A low rumble sounds from Roland, making you flinch. The burning starts to ease, cramps dissipate slowly. Your muscles and arms continue to tremble as you stretch out onto your back. The lights overhead are bright, you have to blink several times before you can keep your eyes open and assess your situation.
"Mom?" You test your tongue against your teeth, prodding at your now slightly elongated canines. "What happened?"
Your mom's beautiful face comes into view, blocking out the blinding lights overhead. "Oh! My sweet, beautiful daughter." She places a cool palm against your cheek and thumbs away a tear you didn't know was there. "It finally happened, sweetie, you presented." There are tears glistening in her eyes, a brilliant smile forms on her lips.
"I did?" You ask hesitantly. She helps you sit up, careful that you don't move too quickly and get dizzy.
"You did, princess," your father's voice is rough, full of emotion. He hasn't called you princess since you were a kid.
There are odd smells in the air. You scrub at your nose with the end of your shirtsleeve. The smells make your nose burn, like walking into a candle shop during the holidays, it's overwhelming.
"What does...?" You trail off, not sure how to ask. Shouldn't you know? You'd think your body would be able to tell you what you are. But, right now, your body just seems confused. There is too much going on around you. The smells, the bright lights, the subtle shift in the air that makes the fine hair along your arms stand up.
Roland steps into your view. He looks so much bigger now for some reason. It must be because you're sitting on the floor at his feet. His dark eyes stare into yours and you know he's measuring your worth. For a moment you think he might hit you, his fists clench at his sides, you hear the faint creak of leather as his shoulders bunch beneath his vest. You're waiting for him to speak, maybe offer something, a crumb of explanation but all he does is glance at your father and shake his head before swiftly exiting the conference room.
You're confused even more now. You look to your mother and open your mouth to ask but she just holds up a hand to silence you. "Roland was just trying to see whether or not you could be...well, whether or not...Mari..." You blanch, eyes going wide at the mention of Roland's late soulmate. Why in the hell would he think you have anything to do with Mari? Your mother quickly continues, "It's just that, well, sweetie, you've presented as omega."
You think you might pass out.
🌘🌗🌕🌓🌒
"Mom, can we not make a big deal about this?" You grumble as she grabs another giant, fluffy ball gown from the rack on the wall.
She turns a cool eye on you. "This is a right of passage," she doesn't snap at you, but you can tell her patients with your increasing distress over everything is wearing thin. "I don't care how old you are. Even if you were fifty, I'd still be dressing you in silk and parading you around the flaming estate for all to see. Now, I don't want to hear another word of protest about it."
It's been a week since you presented as...omega. You still cringe thinking about it. It's not that you don't want to be an omega, you're just not sure why everyone keeps treating you like you're made of glass now. You know Omegas are rare, even more rare than an Alpha. But, it's bad enough you feel like every alpha in your family wrinkles their nose at you, saying you smell kind of funny. They don't smell so great themselves. You just wish they would treat you the same as before.
Your dad explained that because omegas are the only designation an alpha can be truly mated with, we're talking soulmate level bonding, all the alphas in your family have been trying to determine whether your scent matches theirs. It doesn't. The way you smell puts them on edge, their alpha knows you're an omega and they also know that either your true mate hasn't been born yet (maybe never will) or they're part of another family. That last possibility doesn't make anyone happy.
You puff out your cheeks and follow behind your mom as she grabs a few more gowns. She's reserved the entire shop for the whole day, just so you could spend several hours being poked and prodded by the seamstress, to find the perfect gown for your designation celebration.
"I'm sorry I'm being a bit of a mood-killer, mom. It's all just so much already. Everyone is treating me differently and none of my friends seem to want anything to do with me anymore."
Her eyes soften, full of knowing. "Aww, sweetie, I know it's not easy. You just have to understand, being omega means things are going to be different. Granted, I don't know from personal experience, but you know how close Mari and I were. You'd have thought we were weened on the same teet," she chuckles brightly, remembering her best friend, "she confided in me just how demanding it was to be omega. Now, I'm not trying to scare you or anything, but you need to understand that nothing is going to be the same for you moving forward. People are going to look at you differently, they might be wary of you at first, but eventually, that wariness turns into reverence and respect. You're part of the hierarchy now, but a rare part that many could go their entire lives without encountering. So, of course, they're going to treat you a little differently at first. It's lucky that our family has experience with omegas, Mari is a fresh memory for us all."
You get it, you really do, but that doesn't make it any easier. Mari always seemed happy, even after she fell ill, she was quick with a smile and comforting words for any who needed it. "Thanks, mom." You smile but it doesn't quite reach your eyes. Perhaps, all it will take is some time. Time for everyone to adjust.
"Come on, let's get you to try these gowns on. Jules said she'll need at least a week for any alterations and we don't have much more time than that before the full moon. Lots of work to do!" You can't help but smile as your mother continues to chatter about the preparations for your designation celebration. You'd endure this a thousand times over just to see her bright eyes and smile. It's not like your parents will get this experience again. You're their only child, quite uncommon, but your mom had a rough time getting pregnant and an even tougher time being pregnant. No, you can't keep being a stick in the mud over this party, your mom and dad deserve better than that.
The rest of the day passes in a blur of satins and silks. The gown you and your mother finally decide on is exquisite and you're honestly, if a bit surprisingly, looking forward to wearing it. The plunging neckline accentuates your full breast, the tapered waist gives a nice defining line to the swell of your hips. It's rich, violet silk that shifts to darker tones of indigo under the lights. It's floor length with a slit that hits you mid-thigh on one side. The back of the gown is one large panel of intricate, dainty lace with iridescent moon opal accents sewn in the shape of a giant crescent moon in the center of the back. The shiny stones match the moon opal necklace and earrings your mother passed down to you on your eighteenth birthday. They were gifted to her by her mother when she presented. The silver heels that peek out from beneath the hem complete the look perfectly. Your hair is pinned perfectly with thick curling tendrils cascading just so.
The full moon arrives before you know it, the preparations for your party continued right up until just an hour ago when your mother shooed you away upstairs to begin getting ready. Roland is hosting your party, his lavish and extensive home the apex of your pack's land. The sprawling mansion has been in the family for many generations, each new alpha adding his own flair. A man of few words and fewer niceties, Roland begrudgingly allowed your mother to redecorate the bottom floor of his home for tonight. There are beautiful strands of garland wrapping around banisters, beautiful and exotic rugs covering the white marble floors, and flickering candles blaze on every available surface. It's to be a grand affair, one your family will be known for, for years to come.
"You look beautiful," your father states softly. The tender look in his eye makes your heart ache. There is pride shining there, pride in seeing his little girl all grown up, despite being well into your twenties. That's a fact you've tried to remind him of the last few days. Each time he just waves a hand in the air, dismissively, and proclaims you'll never be too old to be his little girl.
There is a swift knock at the door that draws your attention. Before you can move to open it, the door swings open to reveal Roland. He's dressed in a smart suit, charcoal gray with subtle black pinstripes and a white collared shirt. "The Jeons. Really?"
"Now, Ro, let's not get heated over this," your dad begins, stepping around you.
The alpha huffs a low growl. "You expect me to not get heated over them being invited into my house?"
"Dad, what is he talking about? Ro," you turn to your pack leader, "what are you talking about?"
Roland's eyes drift from your father to you. "Apparently, it seems your parents have decided to invite everyone to your designation party. Everyone."
Your eyes flash, heat rises under your skin. "I'm sorry," you turn to your father, hands going onto your hips, "you did what?!"
Your father puffs up his chest, meeting both your and Roland's challenges glares. "She's presented as omega, Roland. You know as well as I do, that means everyone gets invited. Bad blood and feuds are put to bed for the night and we all grit our teeth, plaster on a smile, and celebrate."
You want nothing more than to scream. The last thing you need tonight is seeing any of those smug, land stealing assholes. Five years ago the youngest Jeon presented as alpha and took over their family. He's the one that pushed their borders, he's the one that took land from your family...and now he's going to be showing up at your party. That scream demands to be released. "I need a minute," you grate out between your clenched teeth.
Your dad at least has the graces to give you an apologetic look. "Okay, honey, but don't be too long. Guests are already arriving downstairs. I'll send your mother up in a few."
Your stomach is in knots. You knew for an omegas designation celebration that it's customary to invite all packs. It's a night for rejoicing, a night for true celebration that should put even the worst enemies into good spirits around one another. Your designation is so rare it can bridge the gap between centuries-long blood feuds. If the Jeons are coming then that surely means the Kims, Jungs, Mins, and Parks will be in attendance, too. They're not all of the same family, but they're so close they might as well merge ties. Then, on the other hand, you know the Bartons will be here, too. If there is one centuries-old blood feud that is famous above the rest, it's between the Parks and the Bartons. You're not even really sure why, something about a stolen pack omega some four hundred years ago. Longer than anyone can really remember to get the story right.
The night air is cool as you push open the double doors leading out onto the balcony of your borrowed room. Roland's house is big enough to house many guests when the need arises. This particular room is fairly secluded, overlooking the small rose garden off of the east wing. If you crane your neck and lean out over the railing you can see the lights from the large patio and pool deck. The back doors are wide open, the sound of music faintly carrying to your ears. The patio and giant pergola are draped in twinkling fairy lights. You see bodies moving around, mingling and wonder if any of the figures you see are people you've sworn as your enemy.
You can smell the rose garden below, fragrant even this late in the season. The wind picks up, pulling your hair over your shoulder, the strands tickling along the side of your neck. You take a deep breath to calm yourself. As you fill your lungs with the cool night air you freeze. On the undercurrent of the breath you just inhaled, there is something...something strange. A smell you've never smelled before. You take another large lungful of air, catching the faint scent again. You can't place it. It's heady and intoxicating. You want to stand here and pull in large breaths until you go fuzzy in the head. Whatever it is, it smells delicious.
Before you can take in another tantalizing lungful the door to your room opens. Your mom's light voice breaks through your hazy fog, "it's time, sweetie, let's present you to the world."
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◅ Back to Master List ©️       2022-02-14   ColorMePurplex2
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hourglassfish · 7 months
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A (long) Aside on 1:7 and 2:10
There are two responses to 1:7 and 2:10 that always quietly horrify me.
The first, and you know, I'm writing a multi part series on it, so it's no mystery - is that Sydney was arrogant/a brat/ couldn't hack it/ wrong to walk out, and that the situation as a whole was her fault. Nah. She was right to walk out, the biggest failure of that episode is not fucking pulling the breaks when Richie gets stabbed. The workplace has gone from dysfunctional to dangerous, she has been responsible for that danger, the perpetrator of it, and she is right to leave.
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little bit of an asshole but i love you so i don't care
Carmy sees Syd saying she's going to stab Richie (as she holds her knife to his chest!) while they're up in each other's faces (with Richie goading her) and he does... nothing. He tells them to shut the fuck up and make giardiniera. At this point they needed to be separated! One or both of them needed to cool off. We've seen Syd bodily put herself between a fighting Carmy and Richie. A little reciprocity would have gone a long way here.
It's wild to me that people think that Carmy was justified in his anger and aggression towards Marcus and Syd and ignore that he is aggressive to Richie also! Richie, typically one of the more confrontational characters in the show asks him to calm down, to cool it. That so many viewers so quickly and uncritically accept Carmy's narrative point of view, even while the show actively challenges it confirms something that has been in the culture a long time: that we are much more used to excusing and aligning ourselves with abusive behaviour, than we are at challenging and refusing it. That people - many of whom have received this kind of behaviour themselves - want to defend it, makes me so, so sad.
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It always hurts me a little that in 1:8 Tina tells Carmy that if he 'tries that shit with her, she'll fuck him up'. It's a fun line! But I'm sorry, no she won't. He screams at her too, while chucking bowls around and Sydney's words in 1:7 clearly hurt her. Tina categorically did nothing wrong. She doesn't deserve that shit. But at the end of the day, she is a middle aged Latinx woman and a mother, and so her tolerance level has to be higher. She needs that job! Shedoes not, as far as we know, have a father she can live with rent free, she does not have youth and the promise of exploitable potential to offer to employers in an ageist job market, she does not have CIA qualifications or a CV full of ‘serious heat’.
Carmy. holds. a. position. of. power. over. these. people. He is their boss, not their manager, and he owns the place, mob loan or no. He has the power to sack them all, to cut their hours, to cut their wages; thus the impact of that power extends not just to them, but also to their children and families. Louis being present in Review is not just to add an obstacle, it's also a reminder of those stakes.
Carmy has influence in the fine dining industry, regardless of whether that social and cultural capital is respected at The Beef or not. The very same oppourtunities that he provides them with in season 2 are things he could also lock them out of if he so chose. Any analysis of 1:7 that ignores this power is flawed from its root. When you are a boss, this power is ever present. One of the few things you can do to alter your boss's behaviour is to withdraw your labour. It's not the only option you have, but everything else is at their discretion, or mediated by lengthy, expensive legal processes.
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yeh, i hate this
Carmy knows this, even if you don't! It's why the apology he gives Marcus - which Marcus does not ask for - is so heartfelt. Carmy has been on the receiving end of what that power, wielded cruelly, can do. He does not want to do this to others. We see him talk to staff with respect even while he endures horrid abuse in a flashback. We see him teach and explain himself, we see him listen and invite feedback - ‘say more’. His commitment to being a good boss is sincere, that kindness is in his bones.
The second thing people say that makes me want to die a little inside is that Carmy bought getting locked in the fridge on himself, that he deserved it in some way, and that getting locked in the fridge was him abandoning Sydney.
Oh my god!
He does not have a diagnosis yet - so anything we see is an interpretation. But it feels explicit that Carmy has panic disorder, and perhaps generalised anxiety disorder and CPTSD from both his workplace experiences and his childhood. A couple of things that he says and does suggest ADHD, or some other neurodiversity. He is not very careful with himself, and does not recognise these things as treatable problems (Richie says he experiences anxiety and dread, Carmy's response is 'who doesn't' - wince, cruel to Richie, cruel to himself - vomiting everyday and crying out of nowhere are presented as something 'loads of people do' to Sugar. Tumblr loves to send people to therapy, but I just want to send this man to do a basic google search of more than fun tbh). But they are debilitating for him, especially at work.
What happens to how we read Carmy's behaviour when he is presented as someone with an untreated disability, and absolutely no support plan in place? Does he still get his just desserts at the end of the season?
The fridge thing is a bit clumsy, I think. It's silly that over the space of three months, no one at any point just takes that job off him as a priority, or at least makes it something where Tony will call the restaurant, not Carmy specifically. It is unrealistic that there would not be some kind of back up safety lock inside the fridge. But you know, they're characters in a TV show, it also does not take two people swivelling around on the floor to tighten the coat hooks on a table (LOOOOOOL) - it's realistic until its not.
But, you know, it's doing a thing, several things - it's Chekov's gun, isn't it, it's the tangible impact of the lapse of focus that Uncle Jimmy is constantly trying to warn them about.
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He wanted to cry here so bad!!! It makes me laugh every time
But umm... guys? What happens to him on that night is so, so horrible. They're a chef down, they're running out of forks, Richie's giving him shit (and Carmy is so susceptible to Richie giving him shit), Marcus and Syd are being all weird. He thinks one of his abusers (Donna) might come, or that she might not come and there will be emotional fallout from that. He thinks he sees his other abuser (Evil Joel Mc Hale) - and he's triggered. He goes in the kitchen and yells, but Syd pulls him back in. Then he goes into the fridge, partly to do chef stuff, I'm sure, but also partly to fucking get his shit together aaaaaand he gets locked in there! He has a panic attack! In a fridge! That he is locked in! And the people he loves most in the world, are the other side of that door, and for five minutes, an eternity in panic attack time, they ignore him! He has no clue what's going on! Last time shit hit the fan, two of his staff walked out (he's still not over Syd walking out cus they never talk about it properly), another one got stabbed and all these new ones are 'emerald green'. And he still thinks evil Joel Mc Hale is out there!
My loves, that shit is the stuff of nightmares! I know he tells himself that he bought this on himself but can we please! stop! uncritically! accepting! his narrative! point! of view!
I don't think anybody on screen recognises that a panic attack is what he's having. That's not their fault. None of them have seen him have a panic attack! They don’t get to see inside his head like we do (which saves them from a lot of R.E.M.) He is locked in the fridge, they just hear the bear banging on the door of his cage! It's not even in the language of the show at this point (though i am curious about how and when Richie came to get his Xanax). But that's what's happening. The team are fine. They do great. He has a terrible, terrible time.
My support worker found 2:10 deeply triggering - and her reason for this, she said, was that a lot of her job was supporting people with panic disorders who are leading teams, and seeing that moment coming, the moment where the panic crashes headlong into their role as leader. Part of her role is anticipating it, and trying to turn it around before they reach the point of no return. And as soon as Carmy thinks he sees Old Boss, he's gone. His body is in flight or fight, and he is alone with that. He can’t show up for Syd at that point, he is in his equivalent of the trenches.
This is also what is happening in 1:7. Somehow his response is often framed as a) rational or b) just an asshole - but it is so outsize to the situation, and to who we know him to be most of the time (quiet, kind, thoughtful, sensitive, BITCHY), that we know it has to be more than that.
None of this is helped by the fact that Carmy's panic attacks are... well they're kind of ugly! His meltdowns are aggressive and shouty, on the edge of physical violence, in an industry where people behave like that because they can. It is hard, parsing through that to the triggers, and fears, and panic beneath. It's scary! It asks so much of people to see that and want to help, not run away. But that is where he's at.
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I do not have language for how much I hate how physical he gets with Marcus here, it is deeply upsetting
I have an access rider, to help me work well with people, and to help them work well with me. My mental health turns up in every job I do. All the time. Has done for years. It can make me unreliable, uncommunicative and absent. It can mean that people have to step up sometimes in ways they weren't anticipating. And one of the things the rider asks for is 'Good Faith' - a belief that I have not shut down because I'm an asshole, but rather because I have some unhelpful coping mechanisms that I am trying to work my way out of, that my triggers are real, not excuses for laziness or an expression of lack of care, that i will give as much as I can when I can.
Syd and Carmy are beginning to work towards this - Carmy says over and over again that he doesn't want to be shitty. Claire fucking muddies things, because I will not meet you skiving off to see your girlfriend with good faith fam. That shit he needs to be held accountable for. Dropping that envelope was a perfect Richie job, I'm still pissed about that. But being locked in the fridge... there's way more going on there.
The idea that Carmy should, and will, leave the culinary world keeps coming up in various metas. But... the problem isn't cooking? I think Carmy loves cooking, still. I think he likes being part of a team, and wants to be good at it. I think he likes teaching, and he is good at that. I think he likes picking the right silent plates and having his CDC in Thom Browne. I also think he likes being there a lot and being absorbed by his job.
The problem is that the workplace he is in is not one that is set up to his needs right now - it's not set up so that he can rest enough, so that he can eat well, so that he can exercise, or whatever he needs to do to help him manage his brain and nervous system. It's not set up so that if he is triggered, he and his team knows how to keep going with the service *and* not abandon him to the worst of his brain.
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Ohhhh it's bad
Carmy ignoring Claire's call and not calling Tony feels bizarre stripped of the context of his panic attack that morning. But we know that anxiety and panic and executive dysfunction take simple things and make them insurmountable. It's not about Sydney in that moment, or even really about Claire*, and self sabotage feels so weighted with judgement when I think about what those frozen moments feel like from the inside. And I've had my diagnoses for 12 years! I've been doing that work, the long slog of trying to make sure my employees know enough context that my MH doesn't fuck up their day, whilst also maintaining my own dignity and right to privacy.
The disentangling of symptoms from personality traits is so hard - fuck ups from trauma responses, what was preventable, and what might have happened even if you did everything right. I never want to lose sight of compassion for Carmy, and the reality of how long it takes to break those cycles.
I also never want to stop seeing the power that he has over the people that he works with, and how, unfortunately, one of the responsibilities of leadership is that you have to be trying to get your shit together, you have to know yourself, and know how your baggage, combined with your power could be creating harm. It’s hard, but there’s not way around it. It is essential that he gets the support he needs, and puts the measures in place that means that he can also be vulnerable, not just for him, but for the team as whole. The power and the lack of framework together are so very harmful for everyone.
makes for delicious tv though 😉
I think a lot about the ticket machines in The Bear. I'm not thinking about them as a former line chef, cus I'm not that, I'm an artist and writer, that waitressed for a while (while a lot of chefs did a lot of coke out back!) and The Bear is fiction, not a documentary. Those little tickets are used for so many things. They're the sound of pressure. They're where a bunch of intrusive thoughts get flashed up on the screen. They are the presence of tech and of speed and alienation. They are the gap where two human beings, one asking for food, and one cooking that food, become consumer and producer. They are a presence of the machine in the workplace, and they stand in for Marcus's machines in McDonald's and for Evil Joel McHale and for financial failure.
One of the things that capitalism demands is that we always listen to that machine. That when we are making a choice, between the people stood around us, who we work with daily, who we live massive chunks of our life with, and the demand for production for go go go - that we choose the latter, even if it harms the former. That we open for service, even though one of our oldest friends just got stabbed. That we prioritise getting the service turned around on Friends and Family night (the easiest night of the year to go out, pour more wine, and say service is a little delayed, but we've got this), rather than maybe asking Fak or even Claire, to come and talk to Carmy through the door, as well, make sure that he's OK. That we just keep going.
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And there are so many really important reasons to do that! Keeping going is how we learn and grow, it's how we make sure that we can pay the bills, how we provide beautiful experiences for customers and guests who are more than consumers to us.
But at some point, we have to ask at what cost. When do we stop and make different? When do we try something else, make new systems, that work for us?
A moment - a small, tiny moment - of triumph for me, is when Richie and Syd turn the table around. So rather than one person, facing the tickets alone, with their back to the kitchen as they yell out orders, the person on Expo faces in. yes they can see the tickets, but they can also see the people they are working with. They can see stress, and worry and joy. They can see how hard they are working. They can see that they are not alone, not just in a promise before service, but during service, when you need that connection most.
My hope is that Season 3 will have more of them making these decisions - ones that lean into seeing each other, where their relationships keep growing, and they build a system where the love and care they have for each other is truthfully at the heart of it.
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Richie is not my bag, that's just for me, personally, but I get how much he means to others, and he's beautiful here.
*Man, I do think the romance subplot was a bit of a misstep. Pop always feels like such a waste of the audience's time, time not spent with Ebra and Tina, time spent on a presentation of romance that has been done to death and is never especially satisfying. Truncates a lot of empathy for Carmy. Boo. Hiss.
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around1302 · 1 year
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EPILOGUE: SIX YEARS LATER
SPARE PARTS: a series
LONDON
(W) strong language, oral (male receiving)
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THIRD PERSON’S POV
FOUR YEARS LATER
Cheers ring throughout the arena, thumping so loud even the floors shook. Charlie watches off stage, hands over an agape mouth as she tries to process just how proud she is – which is a pretty impossible feat. Amelia’s screams deafen her from the left, her own jumping adding to the shakes and only making her husband worry because a woman only two months from her due date definitely shouldn’t be moving like that.
(Even if she insists she knows what’s doing by the third time round).
“Oh, my God, this is going straight to his dick,” Liam laughs, whistling so loud that a few fans nearly spot them hidden behind the curtain. It was absolutely essential no one saw them – this wasn’t their night in the slightest.
“Thank you so much London!” Louis belts to the crowd one last time, trying his best to soak those emotional final few moments in before descending and joining his friends backstage.
They all scream, engulfing him in a suffocating group hug Amelia’s forced to bow out from early. Louis is clearly high on adrenaline, nearly shaking with the thrill of it all, as his former bandmates lap over each other to congratulate him.
“God, it felt so weird at first,” he pants, nodding his thanks toward the crew member who handed him a water as they all made their way to the tour buses. His tour buses, “being up there alone, but it was incredible. I just want to go out there and do it all again.”
“Good job you’ve booked a whole ass tour then,” Niall grips his shoulders, kissing the back of his sweaty head.
“Lou, you were fucking ace!” Zayn shouts over the phone Liam nearly forgot he was holding. It’s a miracle the signal and battery even held up in the 02, especially from Zayn’s hotel in Florence.
“How’s the exhibition going?” Louis responds, taking Liam’s phone to face Zayn for a minute.
The five of them climb onto the buses, each taking a minute to gasp at how different it is. Like slipping on an old cardigan, they all expected to see the red leather they were so used to and the posters they’d chosen and the always stocked mini fridge. This bus is all Louis now.
“So good,” Zayn begins to break up as the bus quickly sets off to Louis’ London apartment, “I had a buyer yesterday, meeting with him after tomorrow’s gallery opening.”
Everyone gives their congratulations, then Louis hangs up the phone before Zayn turns into nothing but a blob of pixels, handing Liam’s phone back to him.
“I’ve never seen a crowd like that,” Niall shuffles on the sofa he would never say is uncomfortable, but, well. It’s no Spare Parts tour bus. “So impressive mate.”
Amongst the pumped up conversation about Louis’ first solo show, Charlie feels her silenced phone buzzing away in her back pocket. Pulling the device out, she can’t help the small smile that makes it’s way onto her face – earning knowing groans from the others.
There’s only one person who can elicit that smile.
“Just answer it.” Louis chuckles.
“It’s just because I told him to call if there was an emergency–”
“Answer it before I do!” Amelia intercepts, throwing a cushion at Charlie. She barely catches it before it hits her face, so as she stands to take the call, she sticks her tongue out at her best friend.
And a finger.
Charlie hears a muted, “love you too!” as the door to the bunks close and she’s alone.
“Hi,” Charlie accepts the FaceTime, unable to hold back her smile as her husband comes into frame. “Everything okay?”
“Look,” he holds up a toy, specifically a 2 year old Rubik’s cube that aims to help with colour awareness. Charlie thought it was dumb, but it’s hard to argue with Harry when it comes to Reagan. “Our kid’s a genius.”
Charlie scoffs. The cube has one side completed in red, all four squares.
“Our kid’s two years old,” Charlie cocks her head, “but did she really do that?”
“Yep, we sat there for like an hour–”
“We?”
“Well her fingers aren’t the strongest.”
Charlie breathes out puffy laughter.
“Who did the cube?”
A pause. Tired eyes crinkling at the seams.
“Okay, so I physically did it, but she told me where to go!”
“Rae can say, like, five words, she did not.” Charlie loudly guffaws. Then she realises Harry’s been whispering this whole time, so she quickly clamps her mouth. “Is she asleep?”
“Yes,” Harry yawns, “took fuckin’ forever.”
“Hey! No swearing with Rae in the house.”
“She doesn’t know what they mean, Char.”
“And what happens when we send her to preschool with that in her vocabulary?”
“God, I don’t know. Do we go to jail?”
Charlie rolls her eyes, Harry cracks a lazy smile.
“How was it?”
“Oh, H, it was amazing. He was so good.”
“I’m sad to have missed it,” he yawns again, “I always knew he’d kill it solo.”
“Mm,” Charlie props her chin on her palm, “go to sleep baby.”
“Not tired.” Harry lies, his fringe tickling his lashes as he shakes his head.
“You just yawned three times in five minutes.”
“I want to stay up.” He nearly sounds like a sulking child.
“I’m not going to be back till gone midnight.”
A pause. “Really?”
“Yeah,” Charlie chuckles, “we’re nearly at Louis’ apartment and I promised I’d actually stay at this party.”
“Do you have to?”
“If ready-to-burst Amelia is, I hardly have an excuse.”
Harry softly laughs, and Charlie wants to wrap herself in that laugh. In fact, she’s wanted to go back to her husband and her daughter and their dog for hours, but she can’t hide away from yet another party.
“I’ll be back at 12:30.”
“Okay babe,” Harry yawns. Again. “Have fun. Give Louis my congratulations.”
“I will,” Charlie let’s her eyes drop over Harry for a minute. After three years of marriage, the sight of him in sweats and blankets and messy curls is no less sexy than when he’s in his silk shirts and his–
“You’re pulling that face.” Harry snaps her out of it.
“What?”
“Your eyes,” Harry shifts, Daisy’s fur visible in the corner of the screen as she clearly hogs her side of the bed, “you sure you don’t want to come back early?”
The door to the bunks open and Liam’s head peaks through, “Charlie, we’re here.”
“Okay, I’ll be one minute.” Charlie smiles, standing up.
“You alright, Harry?” Liam shouts.
“I’ll be one minute,” grits lilts, shooing Liam out with a smirk.
“I really need to go now,” Charlie’s attention reverts back to the screen, to Harry. “I love you. Stay up.”
“Always,” Harry has to have won some kind of world record for yawning at this point, “I love you.”
2 YEARS LATER
Thousands upon thousands await him, chanting and cheering for him as the final recognisable song from his (carefully curated) pre-show playlist slowly fades to a halt.
He should be jumping up and down on the spot, breathing short, sharp breaths and recounting the lyrics he always forgets (and probably will always forget). He should be hyping himself up to play his first ever stadium alone, he should be warming up or fuck, praying.
But no. He’s nowhere to be found.
He’s late.
“Fuckin’ unbelievable,” his manger, Jeff, paces over Ibrox’s backstage, about ready to quit, steam leaking from his ears - cartoon or not, his top client is always the one to make that happen.
Jeff could accept late six years ago. It was nerve wracking, opening a tour alone after a controversial departure from the band. Plus, he was well aware of his reputation, Jeff knew what he was signing on for.
But the man’s twenty-eight, for fuck’s sake. The man’s not some stupid early twenty-something who sees this whole thing as a fun little quest he gets to dictate. Over the years, and especially through the pandemic, he finally matured. He finally realised that being punctual is actually okay! And more than that, it doesn’t give your manager and crew kittens three minutes before Golden is supposed to blast to 50,000.
… except when it comes to pre-show blowjobs from his wife.
“Oh, my God, baby.”
Harry throws his head back, fingers taking turns in fisting the cushy sofa beneath him and raking through Charlie’s curls. Her tongue swirls his tip, her own insistence for punctuality urging her to make him finish as soon as possible. She looks up at him through long lashes, knowing eye contact while she mouths him like that will have him tipping over the edge in no time.
It was never even supposed to happen. She only went in his dressing room to wish him luck, see how he was doing, give him a chaste kiss if anything. And, if she was a little honest with herself, she wanted to see his outfit before the world did.
Catching him half-dressed with the hair that told her he’d been nervously messing with it for half an hour, well. Who wouldn’t drop to their knees and kiss their way to his cock in their mouth?
“Yeah, shit,” Harry pants, forcing his head to roll forward so he can watch her. “How do you just seem to get better at this?”
Charlie smiles around his prick, injecting butterflies into his stomach and–
“Harry, I’m going to ask one more time.”
“One minute!” Charlie surfaces, barely able to breathe as she shouts at Jeff this time. Jeff’s grumbles are audible from the other side of the door, as are the sound of feet shuffling away.
If there’s one person Jeff isn’t going to yell at, it’s Charlie.
Harry’s eyes widen, embarrassment heating his neck, but Charlie’s hand pumping his shaft silences him till he’s biting blood into his bottom lip and announcing,
“Baby, I’m gonna–” he doesn’t have to finish his sentence before her mouth is back on him, and he’s coming down the back of her wonderful throat.
The noises he makes as he finishes only spur her to suck him through his orgasm, all the way till he’s pulling her away and twitching with sensitivity.
“Okay, you need to go.”
Charlie stands, wiping her mouth and shanking his boxers and trousers up for him while he lays back, dazed the fuck out of his mind.
“Huh?” He barely understands a word she’s saying, let alone able to comprehend where he is and what he’s about to do.
“You have a show, H,” Charlie straddles his lap to fix his hair, styling it quickly in the way she knows he likes. Harry’s hands instinctively fly to her waist, grinning lazily as she fusses over his fucked-out appearance.
“That might’ve been your best work, sweetheart.”
“Shut up,” Charlie mumbles behind a smile. He pecks her swollen lips.
Standing up, she adjusts herself, too. Her hair that had been ragged at by a feral Harry, her lipstick that was practically cheekstick by now. Her top, that he’d messily yanked down during their initial make out session when he insisted he just had to bite at least one mark into her breasts.
“Okay, you have two minutes,” Charlie checks her phone, grabbing his white tank and jacket from his coat-rack. Coming round from the head, panic starts to set in.
“Shit,” he mutters under his breath, standing up. Charlie turns around, noticing that gone-off look in his eyes which tells her he’s either about to brush it off completely or melt into a panic attack. Neither are exactly great coping mechanisms, but Charlie really needs to prevent the latter right now.
“H, it’s nothing.”
She throws him the tank, waiting for him with the jacket. He glances at her, that postcoital glow long gone. Anxiety was starting to seep into those gaps she had managed to close just a few minutes ago, but were starting to crack at the seams.
“50,000 is not nothing.”
Charlie puts his jacket on for him, afraid he’d stand there forever if she didn’t.
“50,817.” She corrects. He scowls. “Sorry.”
“Look, of course it’s not nothing. It’s a huge deal. But I know you,” she grabs his face, forcing his eyes to still on something solid. A stray curl falls against his forehead, framing his furrowed brows. “You’re going to get on that stage, and you’re going to fucking kill it.”
Harry huffs a breath, unconvinced.
“Honey, you’ve done it before.” Charlie smiles softly, brushing away the strand.
“Yeah,” he mutters, “with you.” He nudges his nose against hers, and Charlie wants to cry at his vulnverability. It’s rare she sees a Harry like this. For as long as she’s known him, he’s remained stoic in the face of fear, and although he’s not as rigid as he used to be – he’s never one to panic so much.
Endearingly, Charlie can pinpoint when he became much more of a worrier to one day, one person.
“H,” Charlie firms up, “it’s just like that. You have your band, you have me and your friends and–”
Harry interrupts the beginning of Charlie’s pep talk by grabbing her face and kissing her, hard. As if he was pouring out all of his nerves into her mouth and something in her lips and her tongue managed to just kill them. He pulls away, pepping light kisses against her cheek and jaw, making Charlie chuckle softly as his hair tickles her face.
“Okay, okay,” she leans back, forcing him away from her skin, “round two after the show, yeah?”
Harry holds his pinkie out. Charlie rolls her eyes, and holds her pinkie out. They kiss their respective thumbs and Harry nods.
“You got this.” She scrunches her nose, and Harry swears he feels his heart drop out of his stomach, which, how? After all this time, how does she still manage to do that to him.
It needs to be studied.
As he leaves his dressing room, Charlie gives him a swift slap to the ass, laughing as he turns and playfully scowls (despite knowing full well he loves it). She says a silent prayer for her husband as she follows him toward the stage, the sound of thousands of impatient fans already deafening.
They round the corner to backstage, where the team and Jeff are minutes away from breaking down themselves. Jeff nearly drops to the floor in relief at the sight of Harry, but wastes no time in calling tech over to mic him up.
Charlie gratefully smiles at Sarah, taking a fussing Reagan from her arms. Harry turns to let the team thread his mic through his jacket, and finds his remaining anxiety instantly dissipating at the sight of his daughter wearing entirely too big headphones and fisting at Charlie’s t-shirt as she complains about said defenders.
“Hi, princess,” Harry coos, reaching out for Reagan to grab his finger with her little hand.
“Daddy, you look funny.” Reagan giggles, wiggling enough for Charlie to set her down.
“Heey,” Harry lilts, getting the go ahead from the tech man before bending to his four-year-old’s height. “You don’t think I look handsome?”
Reagan shakes her head, brown curls bouncing against her cheeks.
“You look like play-dough.”
Charlie snorts, because she kinda hit the nail on the head. Harry’s band are giggling, too, as they prepare to get on stage. Harry narrows his eyes at them all.
“Do I have to wear these?” Reagan bashes her fists against the headphones.
“Afraid so, Rae,” Harry adjusts them so they sit a little looser on her head, but she’s still unhappy. “Your ears are too little right now,” he tries to explain, but if he knows his daughter at all, he knows she’ll be upset throughout the whole show because her hairdo’s squashed.
That’s Auntie Amelia’s damning influence.
“I don’t want to interrupt, but–”
“Yeah, yeah,” Harry stands, not deaf to the chants for him outside.
He kisses Reagan’s head, then turns to his wife.
“How’s Daisy?”
“Daisy’s fine,” Charlie sighs around a smile. Of course Harry’s worried about their dog right now. “Lia and Niall texted, she’s passed out on the sofa.”
Harry nods, clearly trying to delay the inevitable. So Charlie hurries it along for him, knowing he could stand there and ask stupid questions all evening to avoid that initial opening.
“Don’t fuck it up.” She winks, pinching his chin. Harry breathes short laughter from his nose, his lips squashed as Charlie pulls him for one final good luck kiss. Reagan sticks her tongue out at the sight of her parents’ affection, to which Harry does the same back and earns a tinkling of giggles back.
Charlie lifts Raegen so she can blow a kiss to her dad, currently jumping up and down and getting a few final stretches in before the opening to Music For A Sushi Restaurant fills the stadium, the screams become deafening, and Charlie watches as her rockstar husband takes the same stage her rockstar self did last year.
@lilfreakjez @be-with-me-so-happily @sirtommyholland @tpwksm @b-reads-things @tiaamberxx @daphnesutton @mleestiles
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celticcrossanon · 2 months
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Hello Celta, you have had to be living under a rock not to have heard about Catherine and Charles. What’s curious to me is why did Charles release his prostate thingy almost the same time as KP talking about Catherine’s hospital stay? His is not until next week. Did he want to have some of her glory and sympathetic publicity? Is he still waiting to the most important royal like he was in the Diana days?
My second point is that an American psychic Linda The Comanche Psychic had a livestream yesterday, and many were frantic asking her about Catherine’s health. Linda is a retired ICU nurse and she said her guides were saying it was an intestinal diverticulitis/diverticulosis. She had a nurse friend with this condition and she had the exact operation with the same hospital stay and recovery time. Another person in the chat, a trucker also had the same operation. It’s where the surgeon removes a part of the infected intestine, and the stitches it back together. Because of the location of the surgery, they have to take special care to make sure it heals properly. I can imagine it takes some time because your gut is not a sterile area, and she can’t lift anything heavy, eg Louis. The origin of the disease is not clear, but it could be some are genetically inclined to get it. I imagine stress is definitely an added factor., as Catherine has taken good care of her health and diet for years This is all allegedly of course, as I doubt KP will ever clarify her medical issue.
This is just to shut down those who are saying it’s a hysterectomy. Nowadays hysterectomies are done in one day, overnight stay and you’re home. As a matter of fact most procedures are one or two overnight stay. For example, Charles upcoming prostate procedure is a same day job.
I’m wishing Catherine good healing vibes. Post operation the two people in the live stream had better health, and it solved their issue. Catherine will be ok.
Hi AnonymousRetired,
I saw the news about Princess Catherine yesterday and then about King Charles today. I think both of them will be fine, but I am going to read on both of them to make sure.
I think the double announcement wasn't done out of malice or attention seeking (for once) but was either a) both palaces wanting to get all the bad news over and done with b) using the King's announcement to divert attention from the announcement about Catherine, to try and shield her from the speculation, or c) the palaces not talking to each other about the timing of the announcements. I'm not getting any malicious vibes from the King's announcement nor any attention seeking vibes from it, just "the people need to be informed about this because of my position as King, even though I would rather they did not know" vibes. If anything, I think the King is rather embarrassed about his health issue and trying to put a good face on it.
With that healing time, I think the health issue is something that involves muscles or other bits being cut and sewn back together, like what the psychic you mentioned said, and not e.g. anything done using keyhole surgery, which has a shorter stay in hospital as far as I remember.
As you said, the main thing is to send them both healing energy and positive energy, or remember them in your prayers, or whatever you do to support their healing process. I wish them both a good recovery and better health after their procedures.
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thelarriefics · 6 months
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CHILDHOOD FRIENDS FIC REC, Part II: Below you will find more fics where they know each other as kids and grow up to fall in love. (Part I)
📖 Come My Love Again by @softfonds (110k)
Harry Styles is handsome, clever, and rich. At least that’s what his friends say of him. He also thinks of himself as a matchmaker in Highbury, pairing people together when he finds the time. But when the arrival of a certain gentleman flips Harry’s world on its head, he starts to question everything that was once all too familiar to him, including his relationship with his good friend, Mr. Tomlinson. An Emma AU.
📖 Sweetest Devotion by @brightgolden (61k)
After his divorce, all Harry wants in life is to provide a stable, loving environment for his three-year-old daughter, Evie. Never in his wildest dreams has he ever considered that life might come with the presence of his teenage crush — Gemma’s friend from secondary school, Louis Tomlinson. Luckily, Harry isn’t still pining over him. Or so he thought.
📖 I'm Resistant but Going Down with a Ship. by @adoremelikeasunflower19 (60k)
When Harry comes back to his hometown for the first time in a long time, he expects to almost drown in nostalgia and longing. What he does not expect, is his path crossing with his former best friend - Louis. It's been years since their goodbye and although most of the wounds have healed and the pain become dull, there is still a lot to unpack and process. They slowly find their way back to each other, talk through undiscussed emotions, and painful memories.
📖 Driftwood by @justanothershadeofblue (51k)
Harry is a lonely and depressed popstar who sailed out of his hometown on Eroda years ago to chase his dreams. He comes back to the island only to find his shining childhood best friend Louis just as cold and dreary as the island they grew up on.
📖 Under the Yellow Roof by @bluejeanlouis (42k)
Colorado, 1972: Louis is a gifted musician spending his days on the wrong side of a drive-thru window. Harry is the lead singer of a band in need of a little talent. Their big break is a thousand miles away. Colorado, 1962: First day of middle school. A lot can happen in ten years.
📖 Here You Come Again by @neondiamond (22k)
A year after taking over his family’s peach orchard, Louis thinks he has it all figured out. His routine on the farm is mundane, yet familiar, and his dog Clifford is more than enough to keep him company. It isn’t until Harry, his ex-boyfriend who broke his heart and left their small town a decade ago to pursue a bigger, brighter future in the city, comes to stay on the farm that he realises just how badly he was lying to himself.
📖 TGIF by @dinosaursmate (20k)
Louis, 13, moves in next door to Harry, eleven. They immediately hit it off and quickly become best friends, but as they get older, things get a little complicated.
📖 i got a heart (but i don't got a soul) by @tempolarriefix (19k)
Or, the one where louis sells his soul before meeting his soulmate, harry is a popstar with a heart of gold, niall is inadvertently responsible for harry's boners, liam is a meddling angel, and zayn is a demon who made a mistake
📖 given a chance by @ialwaysknewyouwerepunk (18k)
Harry and Louis were best friends in elementary school, but grew apart suddenly when they hit secondary school. When they run into each other as adults, those old feelings come flooding back. They decide to grab a drink, but will they ever be able to sort out years and years of misunderstanding?
📖 Restless Lane by @jaerie (14k)
Louis had grown used to his boring life back in Mississippi as a stand-in father figure to his siblings. He never expected his childhood friend to show up on his lawn with the heat of summer or that he would remind Louis how much of himself he'd tucked away and neglected. He also never expected to find himself caught up in a tangled web of feelings or secrets that just might break him. Maybe he had never known Harry at all.
📖 Once The Dark Divides by @zanniscaramouche (14k)
Louis finds out his childhood best friend is a Dom and somehow convinces him it's a good idea to learn about the world of kink with a hands on lesson
📖 All I Want Is You by @polaroidlouis (13k)
harry has a kid from a previous relationship. he and kit come to stay with louis for a while.
📖 Someday My Prince Will Come by @princelyharry (8k)
A handsome boy named Harry Styles, takes refuge in the woods in the little cottage of the two dwarfs with his beloved Huntsman to hide from his father’s brother, King Simon. The evil King is jealous of Harry’s youth because he wants to be known as “the fairest in the land” and Harry’s beauty surpasses his own. Or an AU based on Snow White.
📖 Not Another Lonely Christmas by @haztobegood (8k)
Harry should be more nervous that he’s bringing a literal stranger to meet his extended family, but he figures it can’t be much more awkward than Aunt Sharon’s Christmas parties usually are. Instead, he’s looking forward to having an extra person to buffer the conversation. A knock comes one minute after eleven. He lets out the breath and opens the door. “Hi there— Louis?!” Or, the one where the friend Niall sets up as Harry's fake boyfriend turns out to be Gemma's best friend Louis
📖 1967: not thinkin' 'bout you all the time by @louisandtheaquarian (8k)
It’s September 1967, the flower children have taken over the Haight, The Beatles are learning to meditate, and their American counterparts travel to an ashram on a California cliffside to do the same. Louis just didn’t expect it to be the new home of their old band member—and his ex, Harry. When he’d left home four years earlier, Harry never expected to see his childhood friends again, and even though now they’re writing songs around the campfire in earshot of Harry’s cottage, he still doesn’t have to - he can just stay inside and keep meditating. Except that Louis keeps playing the melody of his song. And one night, Harry breaks.
📖 All at once, this is enough by @lunarheslwt (7k)
Harry, overcome with burn out, wants to nest but he has never nested before, doesn’t know how to. Louis, his best friend, is only happy to help him make a nest and be there for him. Along the way, they find something more.
📖 I'm Always Free To Run Home (No Matter How Far I've Gone) by @fearlesslarrie28 (6k)
Or, the one where Harry and Louis are estranged childhood friends whose friendship would never work out... on many levels.
📖 The President and His Captain by @tommokat (5k)
Childhood best friends turn boyfriends Harry and Louis have kept their relationship quiet for almost a year now, so when Harry's basketball coach enforces a no dating rule for the season, they should have no problem sticking to that rule. Right?
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i-want-my-iwtv · 1 month
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I will be delusional as I want BUT I'll pretend that tom cruise going back to Warner Bros means we'll finally get the deleted scenes from the iwtv please please manifesting
🙏🙏🙏 Anon, embrace being delusional! I wish! If anyone's connected with Warner Bros please please tell them we want the deleted scenes!
Anyway since we're on the topic... over the years I've talked about wanting the cut scenes, and I wanted to reflect for a moment on why we want them. I think we want them because, like a delicious cake, once it's all consumed, we still look at the serving plate, hoping we can still lick the icing off the knife, or maybe the baker has some leftover cake back in the kitchen?? Or maybe they can tell us that the secret ingredient to intensifying the chocolate is ESPRESSO... We just want another taste so badly! We want to know the secret ingredients that set it apart from other cakes. And some filmmakers know that, and sometimes they're happy to share the cut scenes on a DVD release, maybe with commentary as to why the scenes were cut, like:
"Here's a scene were Louis kills a priest and ultimately we had an overall run time limit of 2 hours, but it was otherwise a perfectly good scene."
"Here's part of a set of scenes we shot early on where Lestat shows mortal Louis what killing entails, and although we loved it, we ended up improving the Lestat makeup & hair a few weeks later, and for the sake of continuity we had to cut it bc we couldn't go back to that location to reshoot, or it would have taken too much time to fix in post, etc."
Giving over the cut scenes is a little like an artist showing the scrapped versions of a painting composition, and that's fine when the creator wants to invite the viewers into their artistic process, but I think the IWTV filmmakers at the time (and for years after) really wanted the '94 movie to be serious* to the point that releasing cut scenes could have undermined their overall vision... maybe they simply didn't want to invite the audience into their creative process.
(*Serious, BUT there was certainly plenty of beauty, charm, dark humor, intimacy, desire, so much more! Maybe the filmmakers cut scenes that THEY felt didn't mesh well with the overall story they wanted to tell, like putting together an outfit and choosing accessories that go better rather than others... you know?)
WITH THAT SAID... What cut scenes would you have liked to see? That's what fanfic and fanart are for, so tell us and maybe someone will be inspired to create it for all of us 💝
IF Tom was still part of VC at all... one of my personal fantasy casting ideas was to have Tom play the Marquis in TVL, and now he's really old enough to do it! 😅 Can you imagine?? Tom playing his own horrible father! Cast younger actors to play kid!Lestat, teen!Lestat, etc.?? Tom!Marquis showing obvious preference for his two older brothers and being horrible to Gabrielle... it could be amazing.
Obviously it wouldn't be adorable like this but... I've always loved Tom Cruise characters when he interacts with kids and teens, he's always seemed very in touch with his inner child, even when that inner child is more of a 12 yo brat. Whole novels could be written on his layered performances with child and teen actors, but for now, just a few thoughts...
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^From Jerry Maguire. I can't quite articulate why this was so compelling... iirc, maybe because his character is really frustrated/demoralized in this scene, and there's something comforting about a kid naively telling you that "the human head weighs 8 pounds," as if to say, "Your problems are not really as big a deal as you think they are; live in the present moment." And Tom in this character seems to absorb that deeper meaning and it gives him some relief, it's a step towards his character's growth.
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When Tom played Ray in War of the Worlds, he had a teenage son, and there was a heartbreaking scene where Ray had to choose between protecting his son or his daughter. From That Moment In:
Desperate to keep his family together, Ray is forced to leave the terrified Rachel alone for a moment as he puts his weight on Robbie and forces him to the ground as the air around them lights up with smoke and tracer fire. Meanwhile, another couple, fleeing the madness, sees Rachel standing by herself and attempt to rescue her, not knowing that her father is nearby. Looking back, Ray sees this and becomes torn between his children, not wanting to lose either but forced to choose. Robbie assures his father that this is what he wants, “I want to see this,” and to please let him go, which Ray finally, achingly, submits to, seeing that Rachel is being whisked away. Father and son say goodbye as Robbie runs over the crest and Ray rushes down to get his daughter as a hellfire of explosion overtake the hills, giving us the impression Robbie has met his end.
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I just love the idea of Tom playing the very character that had caused so much pain for Lestat, that Lestat was always on defense from that man, looooong after he died. Despite all the torment the Marquis inflicted on Lestat, Lestat still gave him a comfortable place to live out his last few years, the roles pretty much reversed as happens with aging parents, Lestat actually nurturing this man (not always in the kindest way but still!) in his feeble old age... and couldn't bring himself to even kill him out of mercy.
Nature & Nurture, Lestat was damaged by his father genetically and emotionally in his formative years, and so much of Lestat's bravado and verbal attacks seem to be a shield for the awful feelings of growing up unloved, unwanted, and beaten for expressing his own desires. So much so that even in canon he often expresses the intensity of his desires far more eloquently and frequently in the narration than he's able to do verbally, even with the characters he cherishes the most. Because to express his love exposed himself to losing it.
Tom could for sure pull off a performance that would capture the Marquis, because he essentially played Lestat with the qualities of a victim perpetuating some of the abuse he suffered from the man who was supposed to be (and was!) his role model for becoming the man he became. 😭
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mediocrevideopodcast · 2 months
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Request: I don't really know where to request stuff, but what about Zib x Nervous Reader? Like how a slow-burn romance would go, how Zib would feel and how he would treat them, romantic gestures, and comfort.
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Unsurprisingly, it can be a little  hard to get to know Zib. Sarcastic, blunt, and usually under the influence, Zib isn't exactly the most approachable member of the Lackadaisy crew. That doesn't mean he isn't friendly, not by any means. In fact, he's one of the most level-headed, caring people in the bunch. He's just learned to hide it a bit. Tender hearts often go sour in this business. A bit of courage and effort goes  a long way with Zib. 
Although if you're part of the crew, there's a decent enough chance he'll warm up to you on his own, too. If Mitzi thinks you're good enough to add to the family, then he won't question it too much. Although he can't help but wonder what it is you do, considering your skittish demeanor. It's part of what draws him closer -- part of him likes the mystery. But truthfully, the other part of him mistakes your nervousness for naivety, and there's a quiet voice within him that doesn't want that kindness to go out. It's a shitty life they run -- you should be able to keep your light. 
When Zib cares for you, it's obvious, yet subtle to outsiders. He keeps an eye on you in the bar, stays close to you when walking down the streets. He's also more lax with his affections, leaning on you a bit more, both physically and emotionally. But you know he's invested when he really starts to speak. Not quips, not sardonic interjections or jokes, but actually talking to you. He's a deep thinker, and not just because of the booze. He's well-read, and deeply intelligent. If you can get  him to talk about his favorite books, or his music, or even philosophy… it should be taken as a point of pride. 
Actually falling in love with Zib is a gradual process, though. One of those romances where you wake up, and suddenly you realize you've been married for the past 7 years. 
He doesn't believe in hard-and-fast traditions like his parents did, but his quiet attempts to grow closer really stand out considering how well you know him at this point. He leaves little room for worry or question, and yet, it rarely feels overwhelming. He's casual, yet straightforward. And damn if it doesn't make your heart flutter. 
The brush of a hand, a pointed glance during a slow set, honeyed words spoken effortlessly yet earnestly… If he didn't have a warrant out for his arrest, he'd be the type to serenade you from your balcony. Maybe he would have, had you met when you were younger. 
(Some nights, when he's lain up in bed in a drunken stupor, he imagines that exact scenario. He'd be lying if he said it didn't make him soft.) 
Despite what some may think, Zib is a very devout romantic. If he had the funds, he'd love to treat you to a night out, like all the wild records sing of. Good food and good music were two of the things that kept Zib going for a long time, even if only one of those things are still within his means. But, as a self-proclaimed nomad, his greatest wish would be to travel the world with you. There's so much to see and experience out there, away from dreary St. Louis. But it's only half as good when you're alone -- it's so much sweeter with someone by your side. 
Funnily enough, he's one of the best possible partners of the Lackadaisy bunch for a nervous partner. He's straightforward, rarely sugarcoating things or telling white lies. As such… there's not much to worry about with him. You won't have to worry if he's telling the truth, if he thinks you're too quiet or too loud or strange. If he has a thought, he'll say it. He's honest like that. 
If he's ever too blunt with you though, he picks up on it quickly. He's a master of reading body language, and he knows how to apologize properly. He's very sweet when it comes down to it. Genuine. 
He's also not above navigating you away from anxiety-inducing situations, when need be. Again, he's fantastic with body language, and he knows how to lie his way out of an event or gathering. People generally don't question how many smoke breaks he's taken per hour. 
He can't fix everything for you -- he knows that. But you'll never have to worry about whether or not he loves you. He might not say those exact three words on the daily, but there's never a moment of doubt within you. He'll make sure of it. 
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marinareads25 · 6 months
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EVAJACKS PLAYLIST STARTER PACK
Absolutely nobody asked me for this, but here are some of the songs I consider Evajacks anthems. I tried to include songs I have not seen associated to them but then again my music taste is literally just one direction, 5SOS and taylor swift LMAOOO. I’m just basic like that🤪. (not including The Archer bc I think it’s universal knowledge that is Evajacks theme song). Also PLEASE comment songs to add to my Evajacks playlist <333
Only the Brave - Louis Tomlinson
“I’ve been close enough to touch, but I never care for love”
Do I even need to explain? Like this song is literally about love being only for those who are brave enough to be vulnerable. It’s a recognition that love is complicated and hard and is often filled with goodbyes and it hurts. And I feel like that really captures Jacks’ inner conflict with his feelings towards Evangeline. Is he brave enough to embrace his love for her and go against everything he’s convinced himself he wants more than anything?
Moving on…🤪
Angels Like You - Miley Cyrus
“I know that you’re wrong for me, gonna wish we never met on the day I leave, I brought you down to your knees, cause they say that misery loves company. It’s not your fault I ruin everything and it’s not your fault I can’t be what you need. Baby, angels like you can’t fly down here with me.”
Not explaining this bc it physically hurts to even think about it. Sorry.
Halley’s Comet - Billie Eillish
“I’ve been loved before, but right now in this moment, I feel more and more like I was made for you.”
Awwwww such cute lil silly romantic song. This is literally Evangeline, bc there is an undeniable difference about the love she experiences with Jacks than the one she does with Luc.
Invisible String - Taylor Swift
“And isn’t it just so pretty to think, all along there was some invisible string, tying you to me?”
COME ONNN?!? Like this is LITERALLY EVAJACKS in every way possible. He is the archer and she is a fox!!!! Like their paths were MEANT TO CROSS.
Lover of Mine - 5 Seconds of Summer
“I’ll never give you away, cause, I’ve already made that mistake... when I take a look at my life and all of my crimes, you’re the only thing that I think I got right.”
Basically this is Jacks realizing that he is DONE with pushing Evangeline away, and finally realizing she is a blessing in his life. That despite all the shit he’s done, he is still worthy of her love, and that all of his complicated past and fuck-ups led to her. And Evangeline is something he could NEVER regret, bc he loves her. Awwwww.
Once in a lifetime - One Direction
“When I close my eyes, all the stars align, and you are by my side, you are by my side… Once in a lifetime, you were mine.”
This is basically about both of them wishing that they could be with each other in this lifetime. Them desperately wishing that they could love each other in this dimension/universe. And kind of looking back at the scenes in the Hollow, and realizing that even thought everything is stacked against them, ONCE and for a few seconds, they belonged to each other. If you listen closely, you can hear me screaming.
Kiss Me - Ed Sheeran
“And I’ve been feeling everything. From hate to love, from love to lust, from lust to truth, I guess that’s how I know you.”
I feel like this perfectly captures all the FEELS that both Jacks and Evangeline are experiencing. It refers to the rollercoaster of emotions that they’ve been through. Going from enemies, to reluctant partners, to almost lovers. Experiencing betrayal but also longing. And most importantly, realizing that all of that was part of the process of getting to know each other and falling in love.
Ghost of you - 5 Seconds of Summer
“So I drown it out, like I always do. Dancing through our house, with the ghost of you. And I chase it down, with a shot of truth. That my feet don’t dance, like they did with you”
OKOK LISTEN, this is what I feel would be playing when Jacks goes into the shadows of Evangeline’s room. Like him realizing that she is not in his life anymore, she doesn’t remember him. But her ghost is still always with him and he sees her everywhere. And then he realizes that having her in his life was a source of light and happiness and love.
Heart like yours - Wiliammete Stone
“How could a heart like yours, ever love a heart like mine? How could I live before? How could I have been so blind?”
This is literally JACKS and his conflict of trying to process how Evangeline feels about him. He doesn’t understand how could a person like Evangeline ever love someone like him. (Specifically, since we’ve established he feels unworthy and incapable of love).
THE END
Here’s a lil waffle 🧇. COMMENT SONGS PLS.
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cbrownjc · 9 months
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Could you explain why you are ok with ep 5? I hated seeing, yet again, the battered body of a black character beaten to a pulp by his white partner, especially since such violence never happened between Louis and Lestat in the books. While I know white people can't understand and probably couldn't care less, I'm genuinely curious about your take on this.
Hi Anon!
Okay, first I'm sorry this reply back took the long time it did for me to answer it but, aside from wanting to think on it, RL things got in the way too. And then I also got caught up with some other writing I'm doing. And, as I said, I wanted to think this out before I wrote on it.
Now, first of all, it's actually not true wrt the books that Lestat and Louis never fought before. Someone other than myself has taken screenshots of passages in the book ITWV where such fights have happened. So I do not believe that it was out of character at all for them to have even had a fight in such a way, as such things did happen in the books. (And honestly, I didn't think it was OOC for Lestat at the time it happened before people started posting screenshots of the passages in the book that showed them fighting).
What has upset people is how visceral and beaten Louis looked by the end of that fight. (And no one is wrong for feeling that way if they do/did). It is disturbing to see a black man beaten in such a way by his white partner. And I actually don't think the writers were completely unaware of that imagery when they did this either. Not when you take into account the other pointed underlying racial dynamics the show did and highlighted throughout the season, before and after that episode. (From basically all of EP3, to Claudia mocking Louis telepathically with the "massa" talk in EP6.) So no, I do not think they were at all ignorant of the loaded racial imagery in EP5 after that fight.
And whether some views can forgive Lestat for it will be an individual thing, at the end of it all IMO. Some views may never forgive it, and I think that is completely okay. However, for me - and why I not only wasn't that shocked by the fight itself but feel I understand what is going on with it is - is 1.) as said, they did have knock-down fights in the first book, 2.) knowing Lestat does have that level of violence-ability in him as I noted when the episode first aired and 3.) and this is the main point - that there, strategically, some clear missing context going on here wrt that fight.
Because the entirety of that fight never once was told from Louis' POV. Until that moment when Lestat took Louis out into the courtyard and then up into the air, the actual fight itself was all told from Claudia's POV.
And that was clearly a deliberate choice. Not just to highlight what it must have been like for Claudia to witness this but because there is clearly something about that fight that Louis is holding back about. And no, not because he's lying about the fight having happened at all, and him being beaten in such a way. The fight did happen, and Louis did get beaten in the way we saw at the end. Because, again, what we saw of the actual fight was all from Claudia's POV, and Claudia would have no reason to lie about such a thing in her diary, where the account of the fight was clearly taken from.
No, it's because I strongly feel that something was going on during it that I don't think Louis can - even now - really process. And I have a huge suspicion about what it is.
We're now headed into book spoiler territory and I don't know how much you might want those, so I'm going to stop with that here. All I will say is that the pauses in the fight when we heard Lestat's voice talking are very, very important, particularly when it comes to what he's saying.
Part of this, and that fight, has to do with the very nature of what Lestat and Louis, and Claudia all are as vampires. Again, I'm really trying not to spoil anything here, because I suspect the show might reveal some of this in Season 2, particularly wrt Paris and the Theater Coven.
Though I don't think the majority of it will be talked about until Season 3 when we finally get Lestat's POV. And it might even be something that carries on over into multiple seasons.
I understand the POV of people who will never be okay with the fight and the imagery it left wrt Louis. But I really do feel the writers didn't do it without one, knowing how it would look, and two, that there is a larger, overall, story arc point going on here which ties into the fact that we are not dealing with human beings here.
This isn't a story about vampires seeking redemption or a way back to humanity. With Rice's vampires, the longer they live, the more apart from humanity they become. That is, overall, one of the things the VC explores here. And they are all going to continue to do some really inhuman things, at least during these earlier parts of the story, towards people they love.
Over time, even as many of them, especially Lestat, learn better how to deal with that nature, particularly towards those they care about and love, those inhuman things about their nature will still be there.
So I think also having that view, understanding that about these characters, as well as everything else I talked about, (including something I strongly feel they are setting up as to why Lestat acted the way he did), goes into my few of that fight and why, when it happened, I honestly wasn't either surprised by it and am okay and want to see where they go from here with it. This is just all, personally, where I'm coming from it with it of course.
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acesofspadess · 2 months
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Write It Out
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January 2011
The start of the album making process wasn't easy. The six of you didn't really know where to start when it came to really writing a song. You had some stuff, but nothing that suited the band, so it was like you started over.
There were so many people Simon/Sony had gotten to write for you, when you went off on the X-factor tour but now that you were back it was time for you guys to start getting into it
April 2011
Majority of the album had already been written while you were away but they still wanted some songs by you guys…
Taken-
“No harry we can’t say you only want me because im naked.” Toby, another writer, shut down with a laugh. Harry giggled into your side as you shook your head at him. “What about ‘taken’?” you offered up and they all looked you. “It would change some of the lyrics around but it sounds similar to naked.” you eyed the green eyed boy who had moved his head to your lap. “Sing it Bear.”
Niall handed you a guitar and you held it away from Harry’s head.
‘Who do you think you are
who do you think i am
you only love to see me breaking
you only want me cause i’m taken’
You and Niall were still working on the tune but they got it for the most part. “I like that, Bow.” Liam applauded writing it down. 
Everything About You-
This one came from H….
“H got something to tell us?” Louis teased looking at you then back to Harry.
“Leave him alone Lou. It’s a great song, Haz.” You whispered the last part to him so he wouldn’t be too embarrassed. 
“I think with some tunes up we can get to recording it.”
and that’s exactly what you did. 
You and Harry had a lot of overlap in this song so they boothed you together and Harry was looking at you everytime sang. You internally wondered if this song was about you.
Same Mistakes-
This one was more, here's the premise, write a verse or two. “I don’t know what I'm doing!”  you groaned slamming your notebook down and throwing your head back. They didnt give you a lot of time to write and when they did it was song after song, and reject after reject. “Hey Petal, come here.” you slumped over to Niall and he opened his arms for you. 
You curled into his lap and took a shaky breath that immediately got Harrys attention. He picked your head up from his position next to Niall and saw the tears building in your waterline. “Guys, operation 4B1P.” You had no idea what was happening but before you knew it Liam, Louis, and Zayn were also surrounding you. “Why the tears Bunny?” Louis asked from practically behind you. “They keep having me write all these songs with nothing to go off of and my brain is dead.” you let the tears start to fall as you ranted. “It's like they give us this false time and then I'm running behind, and then I have to make up my mind on what to give them, and then it's like a game of tag. This is good- this isn't good. And then i wait and then they like something and im like yay, but then they tell me to write ten more songs and i make the same mistakes when only one comes out good and then-” you cut yourself off scrambling out of Nialls lap. 
“There it is.” Liam muttered to the boys as you turned on the recording before stepping into the booth.
‘Think that we got more time
When were falling behind
Gotta make up our minds
Or else we play, play, play all the same old games 
And we wait, wait, wait, for the end to change 
and we take, take, take, it for granted that we’ll be the same,
But were making all the same mistakes’
It was time for you decide what song you wanted for you single and after listening to all the songs you knew exactly which one it was.
“What Makes You Beautiful.”
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
tags:
@youcan-nolonger-run @ravenclawdirectioner
@luxiorchive  @superlegend216
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savage-garden-nights · 10 months
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Can we, as an audience, trust anything Louis says? I've been reading your meta and I started thinking about where everything went wrong with Louis' relationship with his family: when Paul died. Suddenly, their mother is really good towards Louis, Louis blames himself for Paul's death. This makes me wonder, perhaps very uncharitably, *did* Louis sat something that prompted Paul to kill himself?
Except, Paul didn't seem to have suicidal ideation. He had hallucinations, but he didn't seem depressed (I'm aware people often don't seem so, but bear with me). Perhaps Paul didn't jump? Louis was depressed, to the point of suicide and he had a history of threatening Paul. Moreover, he asked Lestat if Lestat had anything to do with Paul's death (something Lestat denied). I wonder if Louis didn't push Paul and if he didn't blot the memory out?
I do adore Louis, but I wonder and he does have a habit of externalising guilt and dissociation.
Well this is why Jacob Anderson eventually had to say something like: I have to be able to believe that something is real. The show/story is so close to completely falling apart that it's ridiculous. You absolutely can't trust anything 2022 Louis is saying, and this isn't an interpretation or an accusation about Louis, it's just text. It's the premise of the show, incorporated into marketing materials, part of the show's own commentary about itself.
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Above: AMC marketing materials (there is actually a much nicer rendition of "evil is a point of view" from marketing but I can't find it right now).
The Rue Royale story has a relationship to reality but it isn't reality; it's about Louis' internal world, his unique way of processing, his state of mind then and now. It is much more about how things felt than what happened*.
And this is something that Louis knows. He's quite aware that this is a constructed, heightened, theatrical, and somewhat compressed version of the story. He also knows it's in some kind of dialogue with what is going on in 2022. He says this directly. He also jokes about it, he checks in with Daniel, and basically tells the audience to suspend our skepticism and fact-checking more than once.
To be fair, this isn't much different from what happens with real memories (which are reconstructed and recontextualized every time we remember them). Living forever can't change your past but it can change the way you see your past self. Even more interestingly--this is also the way stories like Interview With the Vampire are constantly rewritten and recontextualized for new audiences, making their characters truly immortal through adaptation.
To your other question though: I don't think (show) Louis had any role in Paul's death**. His guilt and grief come from not being able to stop it and the trauma of witnessing it. He still talks about Paul's death affecting him deeply decades later.
I see Louis as someone who connects and disconnects from emotions easily, sometimes involuntarily, sometimes profoundly. So in some ways, to him, everything means nothing and it's all boring and meaningless and empty forever. And in some ways it's like everything literally just happened and he can't get over it or even get to the next stage of processing.
*With this said, I break with a lot of the fandom on the idea that events are going to be changed significantly in future seasons--e.g. such-and-such event "didn't really happen" (theories of the "Louis didn't kill Lestat" or "Louis killed Paul" variety). I think that would be a very cheap way to solve the problems presented in the story.
So one of my assumptions is the events in Louis' story occurred in this sequence. The problems are problems of perspective, emotions, weighting the wrong things, not paying close attention to what we actually see happening in Louis' flashbacks. I think there are pieces of information that were left out that will transform the context of some events, not change the events themselves. BUT,
**Obviously it's possible for this kind of twist to be coming in S2, and what happened to Paul in the book is a lot more ambiguous. But, like Jacob, I have to believe that this story is basically true or there is nothing to interpret because anything could be anything.
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