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#as we grow
loveforpreserumsteve · 2 hours ago
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As We Grow: "ALN" Story (Pre-Serum Omega!Steve and Alpha!Bucky Domestic AU)
One Hundred and Eight:
Steve was so proud that he almost forgot that he and Bucky were meant to give their own speeches. Hands shaking, Steve sat Bitsy in his seat and held Bucky's hand on the way up to the platform. Accepting the soothing squeezes all the way down the aisle until they reached the podium.
Still holding hands, Bucky kissed Oliver's forehead and said into his ear, "I love you. You did good, squirt."
Blushing, Oliver muttered, "Thanks."
Giving Oliver's shoulder a squeeze, Bucky moved to the microphone. As Steve slung his arm around Oliver's shoulders, Bucky joked, "I don't know how I'm going to follow that."
The audience laughed at that and Bucky smoothed out his paper. Giving their guests a classic smirk as he started, "Today, mine and Stevie's son, Oliver, is a young man.
"Which I guess makes my mate right," Bucky glanced over his shoulder to wink at Steve before finishing, "I'm old. I guess I can retire now, huh? Maybe even let Oliver take my place down at the shop."
Teasing, Bucky ruffled Oliver's hair and looked over to Winnie and George, "How does that sound mom and dad?"
Steve rolled his eyes and Winnie joked, "He can take my job!"
"Well, then," Bucky chuckled and asked, "How does that sound, Ollie?"
Unamused, Oliver shook his head and hid his face. Chuckling, Bucky said, "Alright, alright. I guess I can wait a couple more years."
As the audience stopped chuckling, Bucky started again, "Over the past thirteen years, I've had the honor of, not only watching Oliver grow, but growing with him."
Pulling another tissue from his pocket, Steve sniffled. Holding Oliver closer while tears fell down his cheeks. He was probably embarrassing the boy, but Steve couldn't help it.
"Guiding him the way that my parents had guided me and my sisters. Lucky enough to view the world through new eyes and experience all the firsts with him." Bucky sniffled and Steve passed him a tissue, earning an affectionate grin in return. "First smile, first steps, first fight. And while I probably could've done without that, I can't help but be proud of Oliver. He stands for what's right. He fights for what's right."
Wiping his tears, Bucky continued, "You're probably all thinking that, of course, I think that Oliver's great, I'm his dad. And while I do think that Ollie's just about the greatest kid, I'm not the only one.
"He's the best big brother that any kid could ask for -- just ask his siblings," from their seats, the little kids cheered and while Steve wished that they weren't standing on the bench, he couldn't help but adore how they celebrated their older brother.
"But he's also a good friend who has their backs no matter what," and on cue, the young teens cheered, thankfully, while sitting. Leaning closer to the microphone, Bucky pointedly gave an example, "Even covering for them when they break a picture frame because they were playing soccer in the house even though they know better than that."
Knowing exactly who he was talking about, Steve glanced over to see Tony seemingly trying to disappear in his seat. Howard beside him, gave his son a look.
"So, it's only natural for him to be a good son." Bucky's voice cracked and he cleared his throat, "And just like his papa, he'll be a good man, too."
Steve's breath hitched as he held back a sob and hugged Oliver to himself, kissing his forehead. All the while, Bucky finished, "We love you, Oliver. And we can't wait to see how you continue to grow."
Letting go of him, Steve encouraged Oliver to hug Bucky. Not that it took much convincing either way considering Oliver was already halfway to his dad anyway. Steve smiled as he watched the pair and wiped at his face.
Then, it was his turn.
Taking his place at the podium, Steve pulled out his notecards. Still feeling the emotion thick in his throat, he took a moment to try and clear it. Bucky must've felt something through the bond because he rubbed Steve's back in soothing circles. Only then was Steve able to start.
"I just want to start by reminding Oliver that your dad and I are so proud of you," fondly smiling at the thirteen year old, "Not just today, but every day."
Facing the front, Steve redirected his attention to his messy handwriting and the tearstained notecard. "Thirteen years ago, my life changed in ways I could never imagine. You made me a father. But more than that, you opened my heart.
"Because --" voice cracking, Steve took a moment to just breathe "-- because of you, I stopped self-sabotaging myself enough to, not only accept love, but to give it too. I guess that's just the effect that you have on people.
"You're smart and funny, and so caring that anyone would be lucky to know you," Steve honestly complimented. "Not just a great teammate, but an inspiring leader. Empowering everyone around you and being the best big brother that any kid could ask for."
Oliver clenched his jaw as though he was trying to stop himself from crying, and Steve reached out to affectionately caress along his jaw. Allowing himself this sweet moment before getting back to his speech.
"I remember back when it was just you and Finn, you would go to his nursery when he would cry in the middle of the night and assure him that there were no, 'monsers,' around and that he was safe." The older members awed at the story and Steve fondly remembered, "Then, you would sit in the rocker with me as I fed him and mark over his foot or kiss his forehead. Just letting him know that you were there. That you would protect him. Just as you would protect all of your siblings."
Knowing what came next, tears already prickled at the corner of his eyes, "And when we lost Flora, you weren't even old enough to fully understand, but you suggested that we bury her with her blanky so she wouldn't get scared. So she wouldn't be alone.
"Not just with your siblings though," Steve sniffled. "You protect anyone and everyone that needs it. The way you stand up for what's right makes me so unbelievably proud." Turning so he was facing Oliver instead of the crowd, but still speaking into the microphone, "You're a good boy, Ollie. A good man. And I'm so glad that I get to be your papa."
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loveforpreserumsteve · 5 hours ago
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As We Grow: "ALN" Story (Pre-Serum Omega!Steve and Alpha!Bucky Domestic AU)
One Hundred and Seven:
"Mr. Barnes," Rabbi Isaiah Bradley greeted Bucky first since he entered first. As the older man smiled down at the kids, he noticed Steve and greeted, "Mr. Barnes."
"Rabbi," Steve acknowledged, his voice still rough from the emotion.
Empathetically, Rabbi Bradley smiled at Steve before greeting more people. Steve exhaled deeply and followed Bucky for their seats. Thankfully, the other Barneses were there. George crying already along with Winnie. Of course, that was how they had been at each of their grandchildren's Torah readings.
But it did make Steve feel a little better to know that he wasn't the only emotional one.
Sitting down beside Tibby, Steve accepted a tissue from her and reached out for Bucky's hand when the alpha took a seat on his other side. Instantly, tears prickled at the corners of his eyes. Especially once the congregation started. Steve couldn't focus on a damn thing. All he could think about was how any minute now, Oliver would be called up to the bimah where he would then read the portion of the Torah he had been practicing for the past year. And then Oliver would be considered a man.
Rabbi Bradley looked over to their aisle where Oliver was standing from his seat, and so was Bucky. Sniffling, Bucky removed the prayer shawl from its bag. Unfolding the lightweight wool garment, Bucky draped it over Oliver's broadening shoulders. Making sure that it hung correcting with the metallic green and silver stripes facing outward, Bucky leaned in and kissed Oliver's forehead.
Steve pressed his lips together to keep them from quivering and to keep the sob contained as he watched Oliver head for the podium. He looked so grown up in his tan suit and green tie. Handsome just like his daddy and as tall as his papa already.
Returning to his seat, Bucky sniffled again and reached out for Steve's hand. Steve's breath caught as he tried to keep his sob from escaping. All he could do was squeeze his husband's hand and feel the pride, affection, and hope through the bond. And while Steve had picked up some Hebrew over the last thirteen years, he couldn't concentrate on any of it. All he could focus on was how confident Oliver was up there on the bimah as he melodically read the Torah.
"'Veshamarte et-hamitsvah ve'et-hachukim ve'et-hamishpatim asher anochi metsavecha hayom la'asotam,'" Oliver finished. Steve only knew that he was done because the thirteen year old glanced up Rabbi Bradley.
The older man nodded at Oliver before finishing with the haftarah, himself. While Rabbi Bradley did so, Oliver noticed his friends in the crowd and waved at them. Rolling his eyes, Steve sighed and hoped their older relatives understood that Oliver was still so much a boy. Beside him, however, Bucky disguised his chuckling with a cough, because he was still so much a boy, too; even in his mid-forties.
Climbing onto Steve's lap, Bitsy buried her face in his neck and complained, "Is it over, yet?"
"Shh," Steve quieted and sniffled before rubbing her back and reassured, "Almost, honey."
"I'm hungry," Kit declared while Oliver stepped down from the bimah holding the Torah.
"We'll eat soon," Bucky promised as he stood along with everyone else.
As was tradition, Oliver carried the Torah around as people touched it. Even Bucky reached out to touch it. However, Steve was afraid that Oliver would drop the Torah since it was so large. Thankfully, Oliver didn't, and he handed it back to Rabbi Bradley with nothing happening to it.
Returning to the podium, Oliver pulled a piece of folded notebook paper from his suit jacket pocket. Keeping his gaze on the paper as he smoothed it out instead of on the audience who were sitting once more.
Clearing his throat, Oliver started, "Thank you, everyone, for coming here to join my family and myself this morning to witness me becoming a man."
Steve gripped Bucky's hand tighter and exhaled in relief when Bucky brought their hands up to kiss the back of Steve's. Steve eased and when Oliver made eye contact with him, Steve made sure to smile. Silently reassuring their son that he could do this.
"For two years, I've been practicing and preparing myself for this day. Molding myself and carving out my place in our community. A community filled with the children and children's children of those who Moses led to the promised land.
"And while Moses never got to enter the promised land, he gave advice to those who would." Fidgeting, Oliver pushed his tousled brown hair away from his face, "Leaving them with a verse that had me mulling over it ever since I read it. Essentially, he told them, 'You shall do that which is right and good in the eyes of God.'"
Sniffling, Steve kissed Bitsy's head. Steve had been there every day of Oliver's life and was always fascinated with what was going on inside his head. But this was different. Although he was only thirteen, the way Oliver carried himself up there at the podium, was so mature that he seemed older.
"My whole life, my pops has been telling me that I'm a good boy and showing me how to stand up for what's right." Oliver's freckled cheeks reddened and he smiled over at Steve and Bucky. Looking back at his speech, he continued, "So, when I read that, I couldn't help but think over all the times where I tried to do just that. To do right and to be good.
"And I think that's what it means to be a man," Oliver stood a little taller. Completely sure of himself in that moment and, damn, Steve was so proud of him. Considering the pride flowing through the bond, he knew that he wasn't the only one.
Bucky squeezed Steve's hand while Oliver finished, "Even if everyone is telling you that something wrong is something right. Even if the whole world is telling you to move. It's your duty to plant yourself like a tree, look them in the eye and say, 'No, you move.'"
With that, Rhodey and Tony stood to give him a standing ovation. Which, admittedly, was well deserved as Steve and Bucky stood too. And soon, everyone was standing, applauding Oliver. And Steve was so damn proud.
TAG LIST: @t3a-bag
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loveforpreserumsteve · 13 hours ago
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As We Grow: "ALN" Story (Pre-Serum Omega!Steve and Alpha!Bucky Domestic AU)
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One Hundred and Six:
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"Papa, look!" Cori called out while Steve zipped Bitsy's pastel pink floral satin dress. When Steve didn't immediately look over at the four year old, she repeated, louder, "Papa!"
"What, baby?" Steve finally looked over at her. With a large toothy grin stretching her lips, she twirled around. Amused with how the skirt of her mint green floral satin dress puffed up. Steve couldn't help but smile and humor her, "Oh my goodness, you're so silly!"
Giggling, Cori plopped down on the floor to play with Princess Butterfly while Steve moved on to help Nevie put on her lilac purple dress shoes that matched her floral satin dress. Buckling them for her even though she whined and complained that she was a big girl and could do it herself. However, Steve was in no mood to deal with attitude and one quirk of his eyebrow had her quieting.
From the living room, Bucky called out, "Are we ready to go?"
Since Bucky was in charge of the boys, Steve looked over the girls. They had gotten their hair cut and styled, so with Steve finishing with putting Bitsy's shoes on the correct feet, he confirmed, "We're ready!"
"Alright!" Bucky clapped and instructed, "Let's go!"
"Be good, PB," Nevie instructed the orange kitten who was trying to get the shoelace the girls were holding above her little body.
Standing, Steve's heart raced and his stomach twisted into knots. The girls were on their way out of the room, but Steve paused. Needing a minute as he tried to keep it together. Of course, not that his body cooperated considering the tears started building in the rim of his eyes.
"Papa?" Bitsy questioned, pausing in the hallway and glancing back at him with those precious steel-blue eyes.
Sniffling, Steve waved her on and said, "I just need to use the potty real quick." Then, remembering that he had three four year olds, he asked, "Do you have to go potty?"
Bitsy shook her head, and Steve nodded, assuring her, "I'll be there in just a minute."
"Okay," Bitsy accepted and raced through the house for the garage with PB chasing after them.
Meanwhile, Steve's breath hitched and his chest clenched, and the tears escaped the corners of his eyes. He had been holding them in for the better part of the morning. But he couldn't help it. His baby was about to be celebrated and considered a man. And that made Steve more than just a little emotional.
Sure, Oliver was only thirteen and he had plenty of time to still be a kid. But those years were going to fly by just like the first thirteen had. And Steve was woefully unprepared for that.
Taking a tissue from his pocket, Steve wiped his face and blew his nose. As he turned to throw it away, Bucky called out, "Stevie?"
"In here," Steve croaked and mentally face-palmed because not even his voice was cooperating today.
Leaning against the doorway, Bucky shared a small, knowing smile. Extending his arm towards Steve, Bucky held his hand out invitingly. It didn't take a lot of convincing as Steve laced his fingers with his mate's and walked hand-in-hand with him as they left for the garage.
Of course, when they entered the garage, Steve snapped out of his emotional state and went into his papa mode. Especially since at least one kid was crying, three were arguing, and Kit all the while was singing the wrong lyrics to a song that wasn't even playing on the radio.
"Well," Bucky wrapped his arm around Steve's shoulders. Teasing, "You were the one who wanted kids."
Playfully, Steve rolled his eyes and elbowed his ribs. While Bucky feigned pain, Steve mocked, "Didn't hear you complainin'."
"Hey," Bucky chuckled, "Anyone who did would be a stupid, stupid man."
Shaking his head, Steve walked around to the passenger side and climbed into the van. Bucky followed suit as he climbed in behind the steering wheel. Steve turned back to look at the kids and gained their attention by clapping his hands.
"This is what we're not going to do," Steve started. Nevie sniffled and wiped her eyes while Kit handed her blanky back to herself. Nodding, Steve continued, "We're going to be on our best behavior. We're not going to poke each other, or argue, or be loud. We're going to sit and listen because today is Oliver's big day and we want to respect him."
When none of the kids argued with him, Steve nodded to himself, said, "Good," then turned around to face the front. Giving Bucky the go ahead so the brunet could pull out of the garage.
Once on the street, Bucky held his hand palm-up for Steve. Predictably, Steve laced his fingers with Bucky's. Giving his alpha's hand a comforting squeeze, knowing that Bucky needed the comforter just as much as he did. And in return, Bucky squeezed Steve's hand right back.
Sooner than Steve wanted, they were pulling into Temple B'nai Jacob. Their older family members were there already and Steve plastered a smile on his face as he waved at some of the extended family members who waved at him.
Glancing over his shoulder, he told Oliver, "I don't want to see you give any attitude, understood?"
"Understood," Oliver sighed.
As Bucky put the van in park, Steve informed, "That includes sighing. And rolling your eyes."
Smiling back at the kids, Bucky added, "And you should probably be extra nice to the older relatives since they definitely gave you some real expensive gifts."
"Really?" Oliver perked, "How do you know?"
"Call it a hunch," Bucky smirked. When he caught Steve's eye, he winked, causing Steve to playfully roll his eyes.
"Now," Steve unbuckled and reminded, "I want everyone on their best behavior."
"Yup, the absolute best," Oliver mocked, sounding way too similar to Bucky in the moment as he climbed out of the van.
And, yup, I'm gonna cry, Steve internally mused, again.
As Steve pulled a tissue from his pocket, the rest of his family climbed out of the van. The older relatives of the extended family fawned over Oliver and Steve could see that he was trying his best to be the polite boy that he -- mostly -- was.
Sniffling, Steve climbed out of the passenger seat and accepted the hugs from the older women. Getting compliments for having such good looking and well-behaved kids. Steve just thanked them, but Bucky preened while letting the girls hold onto his fingers and twirl.
Losing track of time as more extended family members congratulated Oliver and Steve and Bucky. Only once more people arrived and most of the parking lot started filling up did they decide to head inside of the synagogue. Being cautious of the cars and their guests as Steve and Bucky held their children's hands as they headed for the entrance.
TAG LIST: @t3a-bag
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isthismyblogname · 14 hours ago
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one day, i might write a worm essay that's not another praise-filled review comparing it to other franchises, but alas today is not that day
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thewhizzyhead · 2 days ago
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here's a fun story from 9th grade that's probably gonna be one of my most treasured memories from my high school years ever: so me and like half of my class were brought to a STEM research showcase held by one of our neighbor schools and as science high school students, we were expected to be um well behaved student-researchers that were REALLY interested in research and for the most part yea we were legitimately really interested in the research projects heck we had a shit ton of questions prepared for many of the presenters and we took pictures of everything (the sci high school i went to somehow made us all interested in STEM research (probably through brainwashing ngl /hj) and it's a blessing and a curse) BUT what really caught our attention was the school's playground soooo like the Model Student Researchers that we are, once the seminar was done and once our teachers were out of sight, we did what any normal Model Student Researcher would do: RACE EACH OTHER TO THE GRADE SCHOOL KIDS' PLAYGROUND AND GO BATSHIT OVER THE SWINGS, MONKEY BARS, SLIDES AND SEESAWS.
once again, we were student researchers from a very reputable science high school and we basically um stole the grade school kids' playground from the grade schoolers. i believe it was the grade schoolers' recess at the time but since THEIR playground was already occupied ummmm some just sat there with their very confused and intrigued teachers and watched curiously as 9th grade student-researchers from a different school suddenly turned into motherfucking preschoolers while playing with the swing sets and the seesaws and the monkey bars and um yea kids THAT'S how you properly ruin a science high school's reputation gjdjd
All jokes aside, to this day I still find the story very heartwarming because dudes the sci high school's workload, especially when it came to STEM research, is so fucking insane to the point that most of us would have to pull off an allnighter at least twice a week. We were 14-15 year olds already hard focused on becoming the next i dunno Albert fucking Einstein simply because that's what the school wanted us to be. So I dunno, maybe us racing each other to the playground as soon as the seminar ended and us loudly laughing and squealing over the grade schoolers' playground was us allowing ourselves to put our guards down, forget whatever research bullshit that we'd have to submit by the end of the day, and just be normal kids for once. We probably made ourselves look like obnoxious childish idiots but hey, at least we felt young again.
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loveforpreserumsteve · 3 days ago
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As We Grow: "ALN" Story (Pre-Serum Omega!Steve and Alpha!Bucky Domestic AU)
One Hundred and Five:
Steve smelled it first. The tangy hint of pre-heat. And through his sleep-addled mind, Steve thought that it was himself. Sure, he was on suppressants, but those didn't always work the way they were supposed to. Hell, if they had, Steve probably wouldn't have become a father or married Bucky.
But that was beside the point.
Mouth dry, Steve noisily licked over his lips and reached for his glasses. However, when he had them on, he found Oliver. Hugging himself, Oliver shifted from one foot to the other. Immediately, Steve sat up and put in his hearing aids.
"What is it, honey?" Steve asked, reaching out and rubbing over Oliver's arms.
Sniffling, Oliver explained, "I feel sick, papa."
"Okay," Steve pushed Oliver's hair away from his sweaty forehead. He was burning up. Only then did Steve realize that he wasn't in pre-heat, Oliver was. His baby was presenting. "Is it your stomach?"
Another sniffle, Oliver nodded and cried, "It hurts real bad."
"I know, honey," Steve assured, marking his upper arms. Of course, that only made Oliver cry more. So, Steve brought the twelve year old closer and let him scent at Steve's neck.
From the other side of the bed, Bucky started to wake and he drowsily asked, "Stevie?"
"Everything's fine," Steve calmly told his husband, "I've got it covered, just go back to sleep."
Tiredly, Bucky didn't argue and rolled over so he could go back to sleep. Meanwhile, Steve climbed out of bed and tucked Oliver under his arm as he led the way out of the master bedroom. Heading for the kitchen, he kissed Oliver's forehead and marked his back.
Knowing how difficult the first heat was, Steve got Oliver some Tylenol and a glass of cold water. Making sure that he drank the whole glass before refilling it and carrying it upstairs. Oliver went willingly; no arguments whatsoever. It was the easiest the pre-teen had been in a while. Steve just hated that it was because he was in pain and feverish.
Once they made it to Oliver's room, Steve brought him over to the bathroom. Closing the door leading to Finn and Kit's room, Steve went over to the tub and started getting a bath ready. Using some of the soothing lavender bubble bath while he was at it.
As it filled, Steve decided to ask, "Do you know what's going on?"
Aggressively wiping the tears free from his freckled cheeks, Oliver mocked, "Yeah, dad had The Talk with me."
"Okay," Steve nodded glad that his husband had talked with him and that the school he went to actually had some decent, mandatory, reproductive health education criteria. Still, Steve figured that from one omega to another, he should talk with his son, too.
"So, you know that you're presenting," Steve continued, "And you're presenting as an omega. That's what this is."
"Yeah, I figured," Oliver sniffled, almost doubling over as he stood there from the pain.
"And I know that it hurts right now, but it gets easier," Steve reassured. "The first heat is always the roughest."
"And I have to go through this forever?" Oliver asked, eyes big and glassy with unshed tears. He was scared and in pain, and just vulnerable.
Pushing Oliver's sweat-dampened hair off his forehead, Steve said, "Not forever. There's suppressants that can stop them. And then there's omegapause, where they stop completely."
When the tub was filled and bubbly, Steve turned the faucet off and stood from the side of the tub. Instructing, "You get in the bath, and I'll get some comfy clothes, alright?"
Nodding, Oliver started to pull off his sleep shirt. Only, he listed to the side unsteadily and Steve caught him before he could fall over and hurt himself completely. Mildly concerned, Steve steadied him and securely kept his hands on Oliver's waist so the pre-teen wouldn't fall.
Next, Steve helped Oliver ease into the tub and cooed empathetically when the boy shivered. Having been there before, Steve knew what it felt like. Heats were never fun in the beginning, but especially not the first one. Thankfully, the first one was the shortest one.
"I'll be right back," Steve told Oliver. While the brunet reclined back in the tub, Steve left for the boy's room. Getting some soft, lightweight clothes, Steve re-entered the bathroom. Setting them on the closed toilet, Steve grabbed a washcloth and a fluffy towel.
"Papa, it hurts," Oliver cried. No, not cry. Sobbed. And that struck Steve and hurt his heart.
"I know, honey," Steve soothed. Wetting the washcloth and using it to wet his forehead. Trying to comfort the twelve year old as much as he could, even though he knew that there wasn't much he could do.
As the bubbles disappeared and the water went from hot to lukewarm, the door leading to Kit and Finn's room opened. Steve looked over to find Finn rubbing at his eyes. When the nine year old noticed the scene, he asked, "What's wrong with Ollie?"
"He's just presenting, baby," Steve assured, still sponging at Oliver's sweating forehead. The heat officially hitting him and causing him to shiver. "He'll be fine."
"Oh," Finn said, not knowing what that was. Then, he asked, "Can I still use the potty?"
"Of course you can," Steve answered.
"Papa, I'm cold," Oliver weakly commented, teeth chattering.
"Alright," Steve nodded, reaching for the fluffy towel and the clothes. Shaking the towel out, he held it up and then helped Oliver climb out of the tub. Drying him off the same way he did when he was little.
Done with his business, Finn said, "Feel better, Ollie."
"Aww, thank you," Steve told the nine year old as he helped Oliver dress.
Oliver answered exhaustedly, "Thanks."
Pulling the drain, Steve helped Oliver back to his room. Setting him on the full-size bottom bunk, Steve asked, "Do you want to make a nest? That might help."
"Okay," Oliver sniffled, wiping his tears.
Nodding, Steve left the room and opened the closet where the sleeping bags and extra boys' bedding was stored. Carrying them back to Oliver's room, he set them down beside the bunk bed and helped Oliver build his first nest. Letting Oliver build it the way that he wanted to, and following the boy's instructions to help him out. After all, one omega's comfort was different than the next.
Tucking a thick, dark blanket under the top bunk's mattress, Steve created a fort. Having experience in the area from all the sleepovers, Steve expertly made sure that it was secure before peeking into the dark hideaway to see how Oliver was holding up.
Luckily, Oliver's eyes were closed. Unfortunately, he was still sweating and his breathing was labored. Occasionally, he shuddered and shivered. To help him sweat it out, Steve draped a comforter over his athletic frame.
"Papa," Oliver whimpered, his brows knitted together and his hair matted to his forehead.
Steve marked over his chest and explained, "I'm going to get my phone, okay? I'll be right back."
Sniffling, Oliver nodded and closed his eyes again. Quickly, Steve left the bedroom and made his way back downstairs. Walking through the house, the faint, first light before sunrise was peeking through the sheer curtains on the windows at the front door. Yawning, Steve wondered when he'd be able to go back to sleep. Considering the kids would be up in a few hours, he figured not any time soon.
Quietly entering the master bedroom, Steve found Bucky still snoring in bed, but he also found Finn cuddled up to him. Chest clenching when he realized that Finn seeing his older brother so out of character was upsetting for him. Not that Steve could blame him.
Briefly marking over Finn's side, Steve grabbed his phone and headed for the bathroom so he could peek in on Alpine and the kittens in Bucky's closet. Seeing that they were okay, Steve made his way back upstairs.
Hoping that Oliver was resting -- the best he could -- Steve peeked in on him too. When he found the boy curled in on himself, crying, Steve climbed into the nest and held him. Kissing his forehead, pushing his damp hair from his face, and marking him, Steve tried to soothe him the best he could.
"Can you si--" Oliver hiccupped "-- sing for me? Please?"
"Of course, bub," Steve appeased. Taking Oliver's hand in his, he went to his go-to song, "'I got you to hold my hand. I got you to understand. I got you to walk with me. I got you to talk with me. I got you to kiss goodnight. I got you to hold me tight. I got you, I won't let go. I got you to love me so.
"'I got you, babe,'" Steve promised, holding him a little tighter. "'I got you, babe.'"
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loveforpreserumsteve · 4 days ago
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As We Grow: "ALN" Story (Pre-Serum Omega!Steve and Alpha!Bucky Domestic AU)
One Hundred and Four:
"I just thought she was fat," Bucky shrugged, petting Alpine as she laid in the box while the kittens nursed.
Shaking his head, Steve deadpanned, "You sure know how to pick 'em, Barnes."
Smiling, Bucky wrapped his arm around Steve's slender shoulders. Pulling him close, he pressed a kiss to Steve's temple and confirmed, "Yeah, I do."
While his cheeks heated, Steve rolled his eyes and brought up, "Now how are we going to name them?"
"I mean, we did a pretty good job with the kids," Bucky reminded.
"Yeah, but we usually had some time to decide," Steve tenderly pet the kitten closest to him -- the calico -- with his index finger. "These little guys are already here."
"Should we let the kids?"
"Are you kidding?" Steve good-naturedly scoffed, turning to look at his husband. Reminding his husband, "Kit named a frog, 'Booger,' the other day. We can't let them name them. Besides, there's only four and I want to name one."
"Well," Bucky suggested, "What if you name one and then we pair the kids up. Or we vote for the names. Then, they'll have to come up with names together and learn about team work."
"God, how have you not decided to coach a kids team, yet?" Steve teased, earning a sarcastic laugh from Bucky. Still looking up at his husband, he was glad when Bucky looked down at him and pressed a sweet kiss to his lips. Appeased, Steve confirmed, "Go team."
"Go team," Bucky cheered, enthusiastically punching the air.
Standing, Bucky extended his hand for Steve and wiggled his fingers invitingly. Another shake of his head, Steve took his mate's hand and allowed the alpha to pull him up. As the pair exited Bucky's closet, the brunet called out, "Who wants to name some kittens?"
A sea of, 'me,' replied back from the living room, and Steve shoved at Bucky in a look-what-you-started way. Before they could exit their bedroom though, Steve stopped Bucky and said, "I want to name the white kitten, 'Duchess.'"
Dopey grin stretching his lips, Bucky leaned down and kissed Steve as he assured, "Anything you want."
"Thank you," Steve smiled, kissing him again.
Pulling away when the kids started calling for them, Steve led the way out of the master bedroom. Oliver -- still upset about his bloodstained clothes -- crossed his arms and huffed, "So, who gets to name the kittens?"
"Well," Bucky gave him a pointed look before explaining, "Papa named the white kitten, 'Duchess.' But that leaves the gray one, orange one, and the calico --"
"What's cow-co?" Bitsy softly questioned, her little brows furrowed.
Exasperated, Oliver face-palmed and shook his head. Meanwhile, Bucky explained, "Calico is where they have all the colors."
"Oh, okay," Bitsy smiled, hugging her blanky closer.
Smiling, Steve joined her on the chaise, and was filled with love when the other little kids joined him. Kissing the top of their heads and marking over them. Even Finn lounged against Nevie. Oliver, on the other hand, remained curled in on himself. Sure, Steve knew that he was upset about the kittens being born on some of his clothes, and Oliver had been even more upset when Steve lectured him about placing his clothes in the hamper. But Steve had assumed that the mention of naming kittens would lift his spirits.
"So, we're going to come up with the names together," Bucky finished with a toothy grin. Looking over the kids' faces expectantly, Bucky asked, "How does that sound?"
When the kids didn't answer, Steve cheered, "Sounds awesome!"
"Princess Butterfly!" Cori suggested, standing on the couch and jumping into Bucky's arms.
Scenting her, Bucky chuckled, "Princess Butterfly?" As she nodded, Bucky kissed her baby-chubby cheek and asked the other kids, "Who else wants Princess Butterfly?"
Finn laughed and the girls giggled while Kit proclaimed, "I like it!"
"Alright," Bucky smiled while shifting Cori so she was better settled on his hip.
Steve asked, "Which kitten should be Princess Butterfly?"
"Hmm," Cori thought, tapping her little finger on her chin as she thought. The same way that Oliver used to do. It made Steve's chest clench and caused him to reach over Nevie and Finn so he could ruffle Oliver's hair. However, the moody pre-teen jerked away and shook his short hair out of his eyes. Steve tried to ignore how that stung and wished that it didn't remind him of his own moody actions growing up.
"I wanna name the calico one," Finn decided.
"What do you wanna name her, sweetie?" Steve asked, smoothing his hand over his dark auburn curls.
Face scrunching as he thought, Finn finally answered, "Autumn."
Steve smiled and Bucky encouraged, "I think that's a great name."
Finn preened and Steve decided, "So, Princess Butterfly will be the orange kitten."
"Little PB, her highness," Bucky smiled, blowing a raspberry against Cori's cheek. Pulling away from the giggling girl so she could rest her head on his broad shoulder, Bucky asked Oliver, "What about you, squirt? You wanna name the gray one?"
Sighing, Oliver shrugged, "Bruce."
"Bruce?" Steve good-humoredly scoffed, "Why Bruce?"
"Like," Oliver rolled his eyes, "Batman. You know? Bruce Wayne?"
Exchanging a look with his husband, Bucky confirmed, "Bruce, it is. It's a good name."
"Bruce," Steve nodded, glad to see Oliver's lips tug up at the corners. Maybe he wasn't that mad about the kittens after all.
TAG LIST: @t3a-bag
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traumacure · 4 days ago
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i wish she wouldn't try to be nice to me it's no good it's no good now it's too late she can't start trying to be a good mother now there's no way to bridge this gap between us because i can't tell her anything i can't tell her anything she'll deny my trauma she'll deny everything i went through she acts like she wants us to be close but we'll never be because she'll never acknowledge how deeply i've been hurt or how much of a part she's played in it. stop it stop trying to get close to me there's no way to salvage this just stay away i'm sick of getting hurt by you
#i'm not having a good time everything in my vision keeps stretching and there's a pressure in my skull and i can't stop crying#i wish she wouldn't try to talk to me i wish she wouldn't try to get close i pushed her away for a reason#it's because i kept getting hurt she kept hurting me she doesn't understand she never will#i'm an adult now but it still hurts like when i was a kid i'm still crying just like when i was a child and she didn't listen#it doesn't matter how many years pass it still hurts just as much it still hurts just like it did then she won't ever understand#there's a part of me that will never grow up it will always be crying just like when i was a kid my body grows but my mind can't move on#i was gonna shower and brush my hair but i can't now i can't stop crying i can't it's going to get more tangled i can't do anything#why can't she understand why can't she accept she wasn't what i needed her to be why can't she acknowledge my pain#we can't be close now it's too late it's too late stop trying it just makes me miserable because of everything i can't tell you#i can't go back to pretending you never hurt me i can't go back to relying on you again i can't i can't#just let me be don't lie that you want me around don't try to trick me again please please stop it just let me be#your actions and your words say completely different things and i'm sick of it i'm sick of getting hurt by you#please leave me alone please haven't you done enough i can't take it i can't take much more of this#i want to forgive you but i can't i can't i can't it still hurts it still hurts you don't even remember but i do#i wish we could be close but every time i let you in you just hurt me more i don't wanna get hurt again just leave me alone#please i can't tell you the truth so don't ask please it hurts to lie just don't ask please it hurts to pretend#vent#🩹#🚬#💙.txt
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smallandknowingdyke · 4 days ago
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thinkin abt college aged jon and georgie starting to realize that maybe they are both just. a little too traumatized to be in a relationship w/ each other but neither of them want to admit that to each other or themselves and are trying to convince themselves that they can ride this out. there's this hopelessly naive part of both of them that still thinks love can Fix Them, but like. that's just not how it works and sooner or later they crash and burn and like tldr:
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flvwerinq · 4 days ago
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Grow As We Go // Ben Platt
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bamf-jaskier · 4 days ago
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Okay so I’m going to try and do a comparison of some of the major scenes between Geralt and Yennefer in Bottled Appetites vs The Last Wish. 
Warning: this is a very long post and I tried to keep it as short as possible but Geralt and Yennefer is the relationship that is mainly focused on in both the short story and the show so there’s..a lot of content here. 
Now, before I really jump in it’s important to note that the show is basically the spark notes version of the book, there’s a lot of missing content in the show mostly because the book just has so much more complexity so for a brief timeline:
Jaskier is injured
Talks to Chireadan 
Meets Yennefer
Take Bath Together 
Yennefer mind-controls Geralt and send him off to go fight some council members
THEN this is where the show and book differ 
In the books, Yennefer’s mind-control has more obvious consequences and Geralt gets into legal trouble and there’s a whole scene with some town leaders threatening Geralt and Jaskier. (Although it is important to note Yennefer in the books has a back-up plan to save Geralt)
As well when Geralt goes to stop Yennefer in the books from capturing the Djinn  she portals away with Geralt and they hate-crash a Noble’s party before having a conversation and fighting the Djinn again, Geralt makes his third wish and then they have sex 
So basically the townspeople sub-plot is removed in the show and the Djinn fight is streamlined into one-scene instead of multiple. Now understanding that, let’s get into the scene comparisons. 
Geralt Meeting Yennefer:
The Last Wish:
“You parried my spell,” she finally said. “You're not a sorcerer; that's obvious. But you reacted exceptionally fast. Tell me who you are, stranger who has come in peace. And I advise you to speak quickly.”
“I’m Geralt of Rivia. A witcher.”
Yennefer leaned out of the bed, grasping a faun—engraved on the pole—by a piece of anatomy well adapted to being grasped. Without taking her eyes off Geralt, she picked a coat with a fur collar up off the floor and wrapped herself up in it tightly before getting up. She poured herself another mug of juice without hurrying, drank it in one go, coughed and came closer. Geralt discreetly rubbed his lower back which, a moment ago, had collided painfully with the wall.
“Geralt of Rivia,” repeated the sorceress, looking at him from behind black lashes. “How did you get in here? And for what reason? You didn't hurt Berrant, I hope?”
“No. I didn't. Lady Yennefer, I need your help.”
“A witcher,” she muttered, coming up even closer and wrapping the coat around her more tightly. “Not only is it the first one I’ve seen up close but it's none other than the famous White Wolf. I’ve heard about you.”
“I can imagine.”
“I don't know what you can imagine.” 
She yawned, then came even closer. “May I?” She touched his cheek and looked him in the eyes. He clenched his jaw. “Do your pupils automatically adapt to light or can you narrow and dilate them according to your will?”
“Yennefer,” he said calmly, “I rode nonstop all day from Rinde. I waited all night for the gates to open. I gave your doorman, who didn't want to let me in, a blow to the head. I disturbed your sleep and peace, discourteously and importunately. All because my friend needs help which only you can give him. Give it to him, please, and then, if you like, we can talk about mutations and aberrations.”
She took a step back and contorted her lips unpleasantly. “What sort of help do you mean?”
“The regeneration of organs injured through magic. The throat, larynx and vocal cords. An injury caused by a scarlet mist. Or something very much like it.”
The Show:
Yennefer: And quite a bit more. You’re immune.
Geralt: You must be the mage.
Yennefer: Yennefer of Vengerberg. 
Geralt: Hm. Chireadan didn’t mention that, uh…
Yennefer: What did he fail to mention?
Geralt: We need your help.
Yennefer: “We”? [Geralt looks to Jaskier who gives a feeble wave.] Just a friend, I hope? [Geralt looks back at her.] Your heartbeat, it’s extraordinarily slow. You’re… a mutant.
Geralt: A witcher. Geralt of Rivia.
Yennefer: The famous White Wolf! [Standing up she steps close to Geralt.] I thought you’d have fangs or horns or something.
Geralt: I had them filed down.
Yennefer: [chuckles] First time I’ve seen a witcher up close. [She circles him, looks him over.] What little spells can you cast with your hands? Call it professional curiosity.
Geralt: Please, Jaskier here needs immediate attention. And then, if you’d like, I’ll indulge your curiosity all night long.
Yennefer: It won’t take all night. But I’m sure we can find a way to fill the time.
Geralt: [holding up the small sack with the pot’s shards] He was attacked by a djinn.
Yennefer: A djinn?
Geralt: Whatever’s wrong with him, it’s spreading. [Yennefer takes the sack and inspects the contents.] Fix it and I’ll pay you. Whatever the price.
Yennefer: You’ll have to do better than juice. [to the undulating figures] "Ragamuffin"!
In the books there is no orgy sequence, instead Yennefer has been mainly just been fucking with the merchant Beau Berrant, who in the show is the Mayor of Rinde. The apple juice sequence occurs in both adaptations and Geralt goes to Yennefer. In the books, Yennefer is alone in Berrant’s bedchambers, in the show she is in the orgy sequence. If you read the passages, they share the same bare bones. Yennefer tries to bespell Geralt, he is immune, she comments on his mutation, Geralt asks for help. 
Yennefer and Geralt have the same flirtatious overtones in both adaptations. Honestly I don’t have much to say here because it parallels relatively well as far as characterization goes. I will say I prefer the book’s prose but I also understand that the show has more simplistic writing and wording. 
Anya Chalotra has fantastic energy in playing Yennefer and the tension between the actors in this scene are quite apparent. 
Bathing Together:
The Last Wish:
She entered the bath-chamber just as Geralt, sitting naked on a tiny stool, was pouring water over himself from a bucket. He cleared his throat and modestly turned his back to her.
“Don't be embarrassed,” she said, throwing an armful of clothing on the hook. “I don't faint at the sight of a naked man. Triss Merigold, a friend, says if you've seen one, you've seen them all.”
He got up, wrapping a towel round his hips.
“Beautiful scar.” She smiled, looking at his chest. “What was it? Did you fall under the blade in a sawmill?”
He didn't answer. The sorceress continued to observe him, tilting her head coquettishly.
“The first witcher I can look at from close up, and completely naked at that. Aha!” She leaned over, listening. “I can hear your heart beat. It's very slow. Can you control how much adrenalin you secrete? Oh, forgive me my professional curiosity. Apparently, you're touchy about the qualities of your own body. You're wont to describe these qualities using words which I greatly dislike, lapsing into pompous sarcasm with it, something I dislike even more.”
He didn't answer.“Well, enough of that. My bath is getting cold.” Yennefer moved as if she wanted to discard her coat, then hesitated. “I’ll take my bath while you talk, to save time. But I don't want to embarrass you and, besides, we hardly know each other. So then, taking decency into account—”
“I’ll turn around,” he proposed hesitantly.“No. I have to see the eyes of the person I’m talking to. I’ve got a better idea.”
He heard an incantation being recited, felt his medallion quiver and saw the black coat softly slip to the floor. Then he heard the water splashing.
“Now I can't see your eyes, Yennefer,” he said. “And that's a pity.”
The invisible sorceress snorted and splashed in the tub. “Go on.”
The Show:
[Later, in the bathroom, Geralt takes a bath while Yennefer keeps him company]
Yennefer: Fishing for a djinn seems an extreme measure to remedy sleeplessness.
Geralt: When extreme measures seem reasonable, yes, I’m desperate.
Yennefer: And yet you didn’t ask me to help with that.
Geralt: Looming death kind of jumped the queue. Now I’m wondering if I can afford you. Have I accidentally agreed to indentured servitude? [Yennefer notices his scars.] Go ahead, ask about them. Everyone does.
Yennefer: Everyone else is boring. [She undresses and steps into the tub.] Turn around.
Geralt: [Tries to look at her in a mirror, but Yennefer moves it with magic so he can’t see] That’s cheating.
Yennefer: Nobody smart plays fair. Tell me, are all witchers similarly blessed? [She sits down so they’re back to back.] Come now, you promised.
Geralt: Hm. I haven’t conducted a survey, but I’d hardly say we’re blessed.
Okay!! Now I can get more into the characterization differences because oh boy are there some here. First, Yennefer mentions Triss in the books which I would have loved to see in the show but the main thing here is how they objectify each other. In both adaptations, Yennefer notices Geralt’s scars when they begin to bathe together but in the books, Yennefer uses it as a way to pry more into the biological functions of Witchers whereas in the show she uses it as a way to talk about their shitty childhoods. 
This ties into how the show, instead of focusing on the more biological aspects of Witchers, focuses on the tragic backstory of the characters. Of course, Lauren is of the mindset (like much of fandom) that Witchers are more animalistic while Sapko really pushes the idea that Witchers are creations of science so it makes sense the show wouldn’t want to talk about Witcher science as much. 
As well, in the books, Geralt is rather respectful to Yennefer, promising to avert his gaze and she ends up turning invisible so she can objectify him but he can’t objectify her. It places Yennefer in charge and the obviously more powerful force in the room. 
In the show, Geralt tries to take a peak at Yennefer and they sit back to back, establishing them as equals. And this is no mistake. In the books, Yennefer is quite a bit older than Geralt, she is powerful mage and Geralt is just a guy. Yennefer is the one in power in their relationship and that is obvious in every aspect of their relationship. 
The show made Geralt 32 years older than Yennefer. They push a narrative of Yennefer and Geralt being on more equal footing (or even at times go as far as to make Geralt seem the more mature and older one which we will see later with Yennefer not being aware of the Wish). 
This reverses a lot of the show/book dynamic where instead of Yennefer being the dominant one she is on equal footing with Geralt. Of course, this is likely due to Henry Cavill being around 37 and Anya Chalotra being around 23. Hollywood is allergic to the older woman/younger man dynamic that is seen in the books so making Yennefer seem younger is not a problem specific to The Witcher but with Hollywood at large.  (Not to say it isn’t still bad to see this perpetuated in the show because it is)
Yennefer mind-controlling Geralt:
The Last Wish:
“He's asleep,” said Yennefer. “And dreaming.”
Geralt examined the patterns traced on the floor. The magic hidden within them was palpable, but he knew it was a dormant magic. It brought to mind the purr of a sleeping lion, without suggesting how the roar might sound.
“What is this, Yennefer?”
“A trap.”
“For what?”
“For you, for the time being.” The sorceress turned the key in the lock, then turned it over in her hand. The key disappeared.
“And thus I’m trapped,” he said coldly. “What now? Are you going to assault my virtue?”
“Don't flatter yourself.” Yennefer sat on the edge of the bed. Dandilion, still smiling like a moron, groaned quietly. It was, without a doubt, a groan of bliss.
“I already knew what you were like,” she continued, “after exchanging a few words with you in Beau's bedroom. And I knew what form of payment I’d demand from you. My accounts in Rinde could be settled by anyone, including Chireadan. But you're the one who's going to do it because you have to pay me. For your insolence, for the cold way you look at me, for the eyes which fish for every detail, for your stony face and sarcastic tone of voice. For thinking that you could stand face-to-face with Yennefer of Vergerberg and believe her to be full of self-admiration and arrogance, a calculating witch, while staring at her soapy tits. Pay up, Geralt of Rivia!”
She grabbed his hair with both hands and kissed him violently on the lips, sinking her teeth into them like a vampire. The medallion on his neck quivered and it felt to Geralt as if the chain was shrinking and strangling him. Something blazed in his head while a terrible humming filled his ears. He stopped seeing the sorceress's violet eyes and fell into darkness.He was kneeling. Yennefer was talking to him in a gentle, soft voice.“You remember?”
“Yes, my lady.” It was his own voice.
“So go and carry out my instructions.”
“At your command, my lady.”
“You may kiss my hand.”
“Thank you, my lady.”He felt himself approach her on his knees. 
Ten thousand bees buzzed in his head. Her hand smelt of lilac and gooseberries. Lilac and gooseberries…Lilac and gooseberries…A flash. Darkness.
The Show:
Yennefer: If you wake him before he’s healed, the spell won’t take. That’s no way to treat a friend, Geralt.
Geralt: You want the djinn, but the amphora’s broken. The djinn’s already long gone. [Suddenly the candles around the sign flare up.]
Yennefer: [rubbing perfume onto her wrists] Do go on. Tell me how stuff works. The djinn is tied to this plane and its master. How many wishes did the bard express before he lost his voice?
Geralt: You need Jaskier to make his last wish so you can capture it.
Yennefer: So that’s… two then.
Geralt: The djinn will fight you. If you try and bend it- [He breaks off, clears his throat then inhales.] Ah… That scent… Lilac and…
Yennefer: Gooseberries. [Geralt exhales sharply.] Tough to get in your head. You have a strong will, but you can’t contend with me. Sorry I couldn’t be direct, I knew you’d fight it. [She leans up to kiss him, bites on his bottom lip until it bleeds.] And I do love a good old-fashioned trap.
Geralt: [slurring] A good old-fashioned… nap. [His eyes flutter shut.]
I mentioned how the show is a spark notes? Well, in the books Yennefer finds out through interrogating Geralt in the bath how many wishes are left. As well, in the books Yennefer is much more physically violent, again asserting the idea that she is the dominant one in the relationship and that she is in charge. 
Honestly, the show softens Yennefer quite a bit in this scene. While she does bite his lip, it’s slowly and not particularly violent. In the books, she is compared to a vampire, grabbing his hair, pulling him down. 
It all ties into the softer, younger version of Yennefer we see in the show vs the books. She is not as aggressive in the show and also not as dominant. Again, this could be due to the actor’s age difference but I also think it ties into Hollywood’s avoidance of placing women in a position that is above a male character. (Especially with Henry Cavill as Geralt, he would be unlikely to play a more subservient role to a woman purposefully considering some of his past statements about Me Too). However, having Yennefer as less aggressive also might make her more relatable to the audience and have her be more likable. At least, that could be what the writers were going for but I’m not psychic and I couldn’t tell you for sure. 
Geralt trying to save Yennefer from the Djinn:
The Last Wish:
“Yennefer saw him, jumped up and raised her hand.
“No!” he shouted, “don't do this! I want to help you!”
“Help?” She snorted. “You?”
“Me.”
“In spite of what I did to you?”
“In spite of it.”
“Interesting. But not important. I don't need your help. Get out of here.”
“No.”
“Get out of here!” she yelled, grimacing ominously. “It's getting dangerous! The whole thing's getting out of control; do you understand? I can't master him. I don't get it, but the scoundrel isn't weakening at all! I caught him once he'd fulfilled the troubadour's third wish and I should have him in the sphere by now. But he's not getting any weaker! Dammit, it looks as if he's getting stronger! But I’m still going to get the better of him. I’ll break—”
“You won't break him, Yennefer. He'll kill you.”
“It's not so easy to kill me—”
She broke off. The whole roof of the tavern suddenly flared up. The vision projected by the sphere dissolved in the brightness. A huge fiery rectangle appeared on the ceiling. The sorceress cursed as she lifted her hands, and sparks gushed from her fingers. 
“Run, Geralt!”
“What's happening, Yennefer?”
“He's located me…” She groaned, flushing red with effort. “He wants to get at me. He's creating his own portal to get in. He can't break loose but he'll get in by the portal. I can't—I can't stop him!”
“Yennefer—”
“Don't distract me! I’ve got to concentrate…Geralt, you've got to get out of here. I’ll open my portal, a way for you to escape. Be careful; it'll be a random portal. I haven't got time or strength for any other…I don't know where you'll end up…but you'll be safe…Get ready—.” 
... (description paragraph skip)
“This way!” shouted Yennefer, indicating the portal which she had conjured up oh the wall by the stairs. In comparison to the one created by the genie, the sorceress's portal looked feeble, extremely inferior. “This way, Geralt! Run for it!”
“Only with you!”
Yennefer, sweeping the air with her hands, was shouting incantations and the many-colored fetters showered sparks and creaked. The djinn whirled like the bumble-bee, pulling the bonds tight, then loosening them. Slowly but surely he was drawing closer to the sorceress. Yennefer did not back away.
The witcher leapt to her, deftly tripped her up, grabbed her by the waist with one hand and dug the other into her hair at the nape. Yennefer cursed nastily  and thumped him in the neck with her elbow. He didn't let go of her. The penetrating smell of ozone, created by the curses, didn't kill the smell of lilac and gooseberries. Geralt stilled the sorceress's kicking legs and jumped, raising her straight up to the opalescently flickering nothingness of the lesser portal.
 The Show:
[In the bedroom]
Yennefer: [still chanting in Elder]
Geralt: [as he enters, Yennefer lifts a hand in his direction.] Don’t! I’m here to help you.
Yennefer: [lowers her hand] I don’t need your help. You’re free. No longer under my spell.
Geralt: And yet here I am.
Yennefer: You seem to want to meet your end.
Geralt: As do you.
Yennefer: [groans] The djinn isn’t weakening. The bard expressed his last wish, but it’s- [screams] it’s getting stronger! Go!
Geralt: That’s because I’m the one with the wishes.
Yennefer: You? You’re the djinn’s master?
Geralt: Yeah.
Yennefer: Well, what are you waiting for? [She screams as her bones crack.] Make your wishes!
Geralt: Becoming the vessel for the djinn will have you lose control, not gain it! Can’t you see what this is doing to you?
Yennefer: True transformation is painful.
Geralt: Release the djinn! I’ll give you my last wish!
Yennefer: You heroic protector… noble dog, permitting my success so long as you command it yourself. Fuck off! I’ll do this myself!
Geralt: Damn it, Yennefer! Tell me what you want!
Yennefer: I want everything!
[In the bedroom, Yennefer’s eyes have gone red, her voice distorted]
Djinn: [speaking through Yennefer] Make your wish! You can have anything you want! You could choose not to be a witcher. What do you desire? Immortality? Riches? Fame? Power?
Geralt: I wish… [The rest of his words are drowned out by the wind. Yennefer falls forward and the wind calms down. Geralt pulls up his sleeve to reveal the third cut.]
Yennefer: The djinn… Wh- Where did it go? [The house groans and creaks, and the two look to the ceiling as it crashes down.]
Yennefer still craves power and wants for everything in the show. In the books, she is more established and wants to try and control the Djinn. This is why when Geralt comes back for Yennefer, both versions express surprise at why Geralt would come back to help after they cast a spell on him but Netflix!Yennefer tells Geralt to fuck off on the basis she doesn’t want a man controlling her life (tying into the Strong Female Character Trope) while Book!Yennefer wants Geralt out of danger first and foremost.
Of course, much of this in the show is likely a response to try and subvert the “damsel in distress” stereotype and while the books have Yennefer as the dominant one and in control, showing that she in not in distress, the show has her explicitly point this out because she is not established as the dominant one as much as in the books. 
The show constantly is more overt with its themes that the books which are far more subtle. 
Yennefer is mad at Geralt and then they have sex:
The Last Wish (Warning this is rather long and I even tried to shorten it without removing content!!):
“You moron!” Yennefer yelled, trying to scratch out his eyes. “You bloody idiot! You stopped me! I nearly had him!”
“You had shit-all!” he shouted back, furious. “I saved your life, you stupid witch!”
She hissed like a furious cat; her palms showered sparks.
Geralt, turning his face away, caught her by both wrists and they rolled among the oysters, seaweed and crushed ice.
“Do you have an invitation?” A portly man with the golden chain of a chamberlain on his chest was looking at them with a haughty expression.
“Screw yourself!” screamed Yennefer, still trying to scratch Geralt's eyes out.
“The wish, Geralt! Hurry up! What do you desire? Immortality? Riches? Fame? Power? Might? Privileges? Hurry, we haven't any time!” He was silent
“Humanity,” she said suddenly, smiling nastily. “I’ve guessed, haven't I? That's what you want; that's what you dream of! Of release, of the freedom to be who you want, not who you have to be. The djinn will fulfill that wish, Geralt. Just say it.”
He stayed silent.
She stood over him in the flickering radiance of the wizard's sphere, in the glow of magic, amidst the flashes of rays restraining the djinn, streaming hair and eyes blazing violet, erect, slender, dark, terrible…
And beautiful.
All of a sudden she leaned over and looked him in the eyes. He caught the scent of lilac and gooseberries.
“You're not saying anything,” she hissed. “So what is it you desire, witcher? What is your most hidden dream? Is it that you don't know or you can't decide? Look for it within yourself, look deeply and carefully because, I swear by the Force, you won't get another chance like this!”
But he suddenly knew the truth. He knew it. He knew what she used to be. What she remembered, what she couldn't forget, what she lived with. Who she really was before she had become a sorceress.
Her cold, penetrating, angry and wise eyes were those of a hunchback. He was horrified. No, not of the truth. He was horrified that she would read his thoughts, find out what he had guessed. That she would never forgive him for it. He deadened that thought within himself, killed it, threw it from his memory forever, without trace, feeling, as he did so, enormous relief. Feeling that—
The ceiling cracked open. The djinn, entangled in the net of the now fading rays, tumbled right on top of them, roaring, and in that roar were triumph and murder lust. Yennefer leapt to meet him. Light beamed from her hands. Very feeble light.
The djinn opened his mouth and stretched his paws toward her.
The witcher suddenly understood what it was he wanted.
And he made his wish.
... (time skip)
Yennefer, slightly flushed, knelt by him, resting her hands on her knees.
“Witcher.” She cleared her throat. “Are you dead?”
“No.” Geralt wiped the dust from his face and hissed.
Slowly, Yennefer touched his wrist and delicately ran her fingers along his palm. “I burnt you—”
“It's nothing. A few blisters—”
“I’m sorry. You know, the djinn's escaped. For good.”
“Do you regret it?”
“Not much.”
“Good. Help me up, please.”
“Wait,” she whispered. “That wish of yours…I heard what you wished for. I was astounded, simply astounded. I’d have expected anything but to…What made you do it, Geralt? Why…Why me?”
“Don't you know?”
She leaned over him, touched him. He felt her hair, smelling of lilac and gooseberries, brush his face and he suddenly knew that he'd never forget that scent, that soft touch, knew that he'd never be able to compare it to any other scent or touch. Yennefer kissed him and he understood that he'd never desire any lips other than hers, so soft and moist, sweet with lipstick. He knew that, from that moment, only she would exist, her neck, shoulders and breasts freed from her black dress, her delicate, cool skin, which couldn't be compared to any other he had ever touched. He gazed into her violet eyes, the most beautiful eyes in the world, eyes which he feared would become…
Everything. He knew.
“Your wish,” she whispered, her lips very near his ear. “I don't know whether such a wish can ever be fulfilled. I don't know whether there's such a Force in Nature that could fulfill such a wish. But if there is, then you've condemned yourself. Condemned yourself to me.”
He interrupted her with a kiss, an embrace, a touch, caresses and then with everything, his whole being, his every thought, his only thought, everything, everything, everything. They broke the silence with sighs and the rustle of clothing strewn on the floor. 
They broke the silence very gently, lazily, and they were considerate and very thorough. They were caring and tender and, although neither quite knew what caring and tenderness were, they succeeded because they very much wanted to. And they were in no hurry whatsoever. The whole world had ceased to exist for a brief moment, but to them, it seemed like a whole eternity.
And then the world started to exist again; but it existed very differently.
“Geralt?”
“Mmm?”
“What now?”
“I don't know.”
“Nor do I. Because, you see, I…I don't know whether it was worth condemning yourself to me. I don't know how—Wait, what are you doing…? I wanted to tell you—”
“Yennefer…Yen.”
“Yen,” she repeated, giving in to him completely. “Nobody's ever called me that. Say it again.”
“Yen.”
“Geralt.”
The Show:
[Yennefer and Geralt portal into the room inside the manor, where they first met.]
Geralt: Yennefer? [He gets to his knees and shifts the hair of her face.] Yennefer. It’s me… Geralt.
Yennefer: [She opens slowly her eyes, shoves Geralt away and rises.] I know who you are. What did you do? You stopped me, didn’t you? I nearly had it.
Geralt: You had shit all. I saved your life.
Yennefer: And I saved yours! You let the djinn escape. Who knows what havoc it’ll wreak now that it has no vessel at all?
Geralt: No more havoc than you. Djinns are only dark creatures when held captive.
Yennefer: How can you be so sure?
Geralt: When did you last feel happy when you felt trapped? And if you were going to portal us to safety, you could’ve taken us out of this shit town!
Yennefer: A fine critique if you could make a portal yourself. And it wasn’t a shit town, it was a fine town till you came along. I had a plan!
Geralt: [chuckles] And that was going swimmingly!
Yennefer: It was. Like a drowning fish. [They kiss and begin to have sex.]
I tried to keep it short here, but the show combined multiple scenes from the book here. I do love the fact that they kept the shit-all line, it’s a favorite. Of course, many people have likely noticed the HUGE difference between the show and books. In the books, Yennefer knows what the wish is and she’s aware Geralt tied their destinies together. 
The show keeps Yennefer in the dark about the wish (likely as a way to manufacture tension on the mountain and have it be dramatic tm) and this just further places her as the not-dominant one in comparison to Geralt. I will also say I love how in the books, Geralt gets a flashback through Yennefer’s past and her trauma. It would have been interesting to see that in the show. 
This final scene suffers so much in the show by being so shortened. We don’t see Yennefer and Geralt have a long conversation about the consequences of the wish or what they might do next, they just exchange a few lines about the Djinn which makes the sex scene seem more sudden than in the books. 
Of course, I will give props to the actors for the sexual tension they are able to generate in just a few lines as they move closer to each other (granted this tension is ruined as soon as the music starts playing and Jaskier shows up, making the sex scene humorous instead of impactful). 
The last lines in the book passage where Yennefer asks Geralt to call her Yen just breaks my damn heart and I would do anything to have seen it in the show. The way the books showcase two very traumatized people finally finding each other is just so lovely and I don’t understand the directing decision to have the tone of the scene switch so quickly in the show from serious and impactful to light. It takes away a lot from the characters. 
In the end, the show has Yennefer in a less dominant position in the books and also has her act younger in a sense. This could be due to the actor’s age difference or Hollywood’s allergy to dominant women but despite this, the actors bring a lot of chemistry to the screen (especially in the first meeting/bath scenes). 
I would have liked the show to give Yennefer more agency in regards to the wish, especially considering that is her character arc in the show, but I did appreciate how many scenes paralleled each other and I believe at the end of the day, the show was able to preserve enough of Yenralt to make it a believable pairing in the show and I can see them improving the dynamic they have already established throughout the first season in season 2. 
#I mean it's sure as fuck better than the bastardization of Yenralt that is the games#shit she isn't even in the first game#and appears in the second one through flashbacks#and also the games imply that the wish changed Yennefer's feelings for Geralt which is NOT TRUE IN THE BOOKS AT ALL#and also just the fact that the games make Geralt the gruff batman type when he is nothing of the sort in the books#and the show plays into so many of these macho-man stereotypes too#and the way the games have Yennefer ENCOURAGE Geralt to take Ciri to Emhyr#just everything about the Empress Ciri ending#and the games not having the ending of Lady of the Lake just ignores and spits in theface of everything the books were trying to show#like the show has its problems but at least there's hope for redemption#the games just has Yennefer and Triss fighting over Geralt for no reason#and the fact that Ciri never calls Yennefer her mother in the games#argh the show better not fuck up Ciri and Yen's relationship#honestly Yennefer in the games never strays beyond her Last Wish characterization and we NEVER see the growth that is seen in the books#which is quite annoying because Yennefer in the Last Wish is still cruel in many ways#she needs to grow and learn#and she does that through raising Ciri#which the games IGNORE#they keep Yennefer as cruel and heartless in many ways#but the whole point of Yennefer is that raising Ciri allowed her to open her heart#of course if Yennefer was kind in the games they couldn't put her against Triss as much#haha if u can't tell I have some...problems with Yen's portrayal in the games...#the witcher#Yennefer#geralt#yenralt#the Witcher netflix#the Witcher books#myposts#meta
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starlatte27 · 4 days ago
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“Stay out of this! Youre bisexual!”
“A sapphic being named vagyna is empowering! We all about da pussy lmao!”
“People NOT being defined by mere stereotypes and caricatures and letting characters be thier own person????? NAH!!!!!!! We want more stereotypes!”
“A sapphic being named vagina as a running joke is funny! Sapphics existing are funny! Sapphic women are all about that pussy! LAUGH!”
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“Ur not a lesbian so that MUST mean that none of this has to do with you! Sapphics dont exist and ur just erasing bisexuals by merely existing! Stop existing ur offending lesbians by breathing our air! You like dick so you cant POSSIBLY like vagina at the same time 😗 We’re only about the genitilia not a genuine human attraction! Stop being biphobic ur existence sucks! >:(”
“If you like dick of course you're offended by the word vagina! Haha bibitch!”
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Blow it out your ass Biphobes :D 
Also credit to: @orquidia​ as without them, I wouldn't have realized that me being attracted to girls as a bisexual is genuinely a normal and REAL thing that exist. I used to actually be scarred of even mentioning that I was attracted to women publicly before I followed them and would force myself into toxic relationships with men online at a younger age since I was scared that I wasnt “bisexual enough” if I didnt date guys. Thinking as if I had to lean towards men just for being bisexual. That it was just about “you are straight but you kinda like girls!” rather then having being able to have my own identity.This caused me to get into several grooming circles back when I was younger and it made me constantly hide the female attracted side of myself thinking as if I had somehow “pick a side” to be seen as bi. I would hide myself, hate myself for existing, I was afraid that I couldnt like girls for being bi. And this might sound ridiculous to some of you now but this is the reality that we live in. 
Either we’re accused of being “cheaters”, people assume that we “have” to mostly like men, people shit on us for merely existing. It wasn't until I learned of the word “sapphic” that I began to feel as if my attraction to girls was in reality... normal. It was NORMAL for me to have an attraction to girls, it was normal for me to have my own preferences and be myself around other people.
Orquidia’s art helped me so so so much with my identity and now ive been more comfortable with my identity and my body ever since I started following them. 
I am beautiful, I exist, I am enough. I know that thanks to Orquidia’s everlasting kindness and support and honestly wouldn't truly be able to express my identity without her art giving me the lift that I needed to truly soar. Thank you Orquidia for everything that you do! You’re great and we wouldn't have come so far as a community without you. Sapphics are real and we are valid in all shapes and colors! Thank you! 💜
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namelessrosewrites · 5 days ago
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hate when i’m researching autism to learn more about my own disability and all the results are targeted at parents about how to manage their autistic child as if the only people who are looking for information about this online are parents and autistic teens and adults don’t exist or something cheers though mate x
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loveforpreserumsteve · 5 days ago
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As We Grow: "ALN" Story (Pre-Serum Omega!Steve and Alpha!Bucky Domestic AU)
One Hundred and Three:
Finally washing the silver paint off Nevie's face, Steve reminded Cori, "It's not makeup. It doesn't go on people."
"Sorry, papa," Cori said, not going back to her painting until Steve reassured, "It's okay, sweetie."
As Kit reached for the blue paint, his sleeve dipped into the white paint. Instantly, Kit apologized, "I'm sorry."
However, before Steve can assure the little boy that it was okay, Oliver yelled from his room, "Gross! POPS, THE CAT JUST TOOK A HUGE DUMP ON MY CLOTHES!"
"Great," Steve muttered under his breath, standing from the table and grabbing some cleaning supplies.
Standing from the table too, Kit said, "I wanna see!"
"No," Steve told him, "You don't need to see cat poop, go back to painting."
Remembering the paint on his sleeve though, Steve backtracked to him. Using a paper towel to clean the six year old's clothing the best he could before racing upstairs. Already lecturing his oldest, "This is why we pick up our rooms, Oliver Thomas!"
"So the cat won't poop on my clothes?" Oliver sassed back as he stood in the hallway, looking very uncomfortable about the cat making a mess of his room.
Getting the supplies ready so he could quickly clean up, Steve entered the room and rounded the corner as though he was going to enter the bathroom. When he found Alpine, he paused. Mouth dropping open and eyes going wide. There, in a pile of clothes just to the side of the hamper, Alpine wasn't pooping, she was giving birth.
Immediately, Steve instructed, "Call your dad, now!"
"Why?" Oliver asked, concerned.
"Alpine is giving birth," Steve stated, then turned for his son's desk where his tablet was charging. Not needing to ask him again, Oliver raced downstairs while Steve googled, what to do when cat is giving birth.
Skimming through the article, Steve called out, "Hey, cookie?! Can you get me a heating pad and scissors?"
Rushing into the bathroom, himself, Steve washed his hands and got the container of dental floss. Hoping that Alpine would chew through the umbilical cord, but knowing that he'd have to cut it if she didn't. Of course, Steve hoped that it didn't come to that.
"Pops!" Oliver declared, carrying the phone over to him as Steve re-entered the room. "Dad's on the phone!"
Trying to help Alpine, Steve instructed, "Put the phone on speaker."
Doing as told, Oliver held the phone out to his father. On the other line, Bucky asked, "What's going on?"
"The one homeless cat that, 'found you,' had to be pregnant," Steve informed, trying not to intervene unless he had to.
"Are you sure she's pregnant?" Bucky questioned on the other end of the line.
"Pretty sure," Steve answered, looking over the crying, slimy dark-fur kitten with fleshy looking paws while Oliver sassed, "If she's not having kittens, she's got some crying poop."
"Here ya go, papa," Finn entered the room, carrying the heating pad and scissors.
"Thank you, baby," Steve took the items from him. Noticing the kitten, Finn's face scrunched up. Especially when Alpine started eating the placenta. Even Steve felt queasy at that. So, he said, "You don't have to stay in here."
"Thank you!" Finn sighed in relief and rushed out of the room.
On the speaker phone, Bucky asked, "How many kittens are there?"
Just as he was about to tell him, one, another kitten joined them. Briefly, Steve thought that it was hairless before realizing that they had a white coat just like their mom, but with it being wet, it matted to its tiny body while Alpine bathed it. Only once the second kitten meowed did Steve answer, "Two."
As Alpine started cleaning that kitten off too, Oliver commented, "That's so gross!"
"It's nature," Steve scoffed, rolling his eyes.
"Doesn't make it any less gross," Oliver argued, mocking a gag at the end like an exclamation point.
Sitting on the floor, Steve shook his head and chuckled as he reached for his phone. With his only task done, the twelve year old left his room while Steve told his husband, "You're giving the kids The Talk, for this one."
Chuckling, Bucky agreed, "Deal." Then, he asked, "How's she doing?"
"Fine, I think," Steve shrugged, not knowing how a cat acted in labor, "I think she's having another contraction."
Watching as Alpine started panting and how her stomach tightened before redirecting his attention to the tablet. Trying to figure out how to help her. It mentioned petting her, but having just met her this morning, Steve didn't think that would help. So, Steve just helplessly sat on the floor in front of the pile of ruined clothes and hoped the cat was doing okay.
"Okay," Bucky assured, "I'll be home soon. I'll try and get out early."
"Okay," Steve kept watching Alpine as she shifted and started pushing, "See you in a bit."
"See you in a bit," Bucky repeated, "I love you."
"Love you, too."
Hanging up, Steve watched as an orange kitten joined them. Just like with the previous two, Alpine cleaned that one too. And just like their siblings, the kitten squeaked out a tiny, shrill meow. Steve's heart couldn't help but adore the kittens already.
This morning, he had one cat, now -- as Alpine started pushing again -- he had five cats. Steve wondered how they were going to handle five cats. After all, the only pet that Steve had ever had was Greg, and she was already housebroken. And with Greg, she was old enough to know not to go around the little kids. At least, not when they were in their hair-pulling phase.
What were they going to do with --
Slimy and bloody, a calico kitten was brought into the world. While Alpine cleaned that one, all the other kittens continued to cry and tried to get at her engorged nipples. Blindly climbing over each other and stumbling about, unsteady on their feet.
Alpine gave him a look and Steve empathized, "I know the feeling."
Then, with everything seemingly under control, Steve made his way downstairs. Seeing that Oliver was helping with the little kids, Steve was grateful as he grabbed Alpine's water bowl. Figuring that she had to be absolutely parched after birthing four kittens.
As Steve returned with the water, he was glad to see that no new kittens had been born in his absence. After all, four was more than plenty if anyone asked Steve.
Setting the bowl within her reach, Steve teased, "You sure have your work cut out for yourself, huh?"
In response, Alpine continued bathing herself and the kittens. Only briefly looking at Steve as she let the kittens at her. Nudging them with her head or paws when they didn't latch. Steve couldn't help but understand that feeling too.
"From a papa to a mama," Steve scratched at her head. Glad when she started purring, "These are the easy days."
Alpine simply blinked up at him. Not that Steve could blame her. Knowing just how exhausted he had been after delivering his own kids. He couldn't even imagine doing it without the assistance of drugs and Bucky. Looking over her bloodstained white fur and the kittens latched along her exposed belly, Steve questioned himself, oy vey, what have I gotten myself into?
TAG LIST: @t3a-bag
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