#as you can see i have many thoughts about them sorry

[swannieluv]

₊⊹ Fogaréu.

✦⸼࣪⸳ Pairing: Arlecchino x GN! Childhood friend Reader

✦⸼࣪⸳ WC: 4k

✦⸼࣪⸳ Warnings: Injuries, child abuse, blood and death.

✦⸼࣪⸳ Insp. by João e Maria - Chico Buarque

✦⸼࣪⸳ A/N: Finally wrote for Arle and I really liked it! I hope you can enjoy reading this and GOOD LUCK ON YOUR PULLS!!!

✦⸼࣪⸳ likes, reblogs and comments are appreciated!! <3

If there was one thing the Knave knew about herself, it was that she was no saint. One way or another, she had to triumph over those around her to climb the ladder of power and reach the top. She watches over everyone with a sharp but zealous eye, without losing mutual respect for those under her wing.

On nights like this, with the children already in bed, The Knave would be found walking peacefully through the dark corridors, only a small lamp in her hands for company. Every now and then, the ghosts of the past seemed to walk around her in that pit of darkness.

With subtle movements, she gently opened the door to one of the rooms, checking if all children were asleep. It was an unnecessary gesture, since no child - at least not those with a love for their lives - would dare disobey such a simple rule for nothing. It wouldn't be strange to say that she had ironically acquired this maternal habit after becoming Father. Was she getting soft? No. Absolutely not.

Cautiously measuring the force with which she closed the door, preventing any of the children from waking up, Arlecchino stares at the tiny splinters made by the children to measure the height. In it, three familiar names almost washed away by the action of time. Perhaps the door should be replaced soon, in a small renovation planned with the money from a "kind donor".

Her fingers ever so gently touch the splinters. There was nothing much to it, so why... why did her mind start resurrecting the forgotten ones of the past? She finally allowed herself to be carried away by the wave of nostalgia for the first time in many years, since that was the room she had once used.

"..."

'I'm sorry, I didn't know it was your spider :('

The white-haired child stared at the note slipped under the door for a few seconds before folding it up and slipping it into her pocket. At that time, there was no 'Arlecchino' but Peruere.

It would be comical if it weren't tragic that the child on the other side of the door had crushed Peruere's pet spider with full force the other day, though it wasn't necessarily their fault if the animal was running around unnoticed on the floor. She harbored hatred and resentment towards her spider's killer, it’s just not worth the stress. But seeing her pet crushed at someone else's feet was cruel enough.

If it hadn't been for their remorse, the chances of Peruere opening the door would have been zero. So she decided to give just one more chance to her… friend, the troublemaker [Name].

"You killed Lady Belladonna."

Peruere left the room, walking aimlessly. However, her unwanted companion crossed the path all the time. Sometimes they were walking to the right, other times they were in front or diagonally. It was annoying and they stepped on Peruere's shoes all the time, almost knocking them off.

"Ms. Bella- Ah, the spider." [Name] blinked twice before their face burned with shame at the attitude towards the animal. "In my defense... I didn't know that ugly insect- err, I mean, devoid of beauty, was yours."

"Spiders are..."

"Arachnids..."

The light from the lamp had been extinguished long ago, leaving its bearer in complete darkness for who knows how long. Or rather, it returned Arlecchino to the bitter realm of reality. Standing in silence, she navigated for minutes in thoughts that are only allowed after the flames of the fireplace have ceased.

There is no clear distinction between what exactly is acceptable and what is bad, it's all a question of point of view. Many factors differentiate Arlecchino from her predecessor. But in the end, the King's cycle has always repeated itself and always will, no matter who is in control and what their policies are.

During all the years that Arlecchino exercised her role as Father within the House of Hearth, there was never a child who couldn't be "tamed", a challenge that was never overcome.

There has never been a challenge like... [Name], and Arlecchino can only be thankful for that since, without a shadow of a doubt, they had been simply the clumsiest child the House of Hearth has ever received. Stumbling around the corridors with that typical mischievous grin on their face.

Carrying drawing materials, instruments, weapons or anything else they could get their hands on, [Name] ran up and down the corridors looking for something they could make or break.

It wasn't uncommon for those around them to stop what they were doing to observe the way they carried herself around, Peruere included. [Name] was a strange child, but undeniably very charismatic. However, once they had passed, everything returned to its usual monotonous rhythm, because they were so...

"Exaggerated."

The word left her lips unconsciously, slipping out of her thoughts and taking shape. It was a slip of the tongue that surprised even its author, whose face didn't let go of its stoicism for a second.

There wasn't a single action carried out by Arlecchino that didn't carry with it a purpose. From the time they went to bed to the food they ate, everything was done to ensure that the children performed as well as possible. After all, there are no quality sheep without pasture.

Leaving that aside and the inspection completed, she turned back to the traditional home office - of course, she had completely redesigned it after taking over, but it was still classic.

Arlecchino had always been professionally organized. She didn't have a lot of paperwork because she didn't do it, but because she simply did. As a Harbinger, countless responsibilities fell on her shoulders. Just the slightest slip-up would not only jeopardize her, but also those around her.

Accompanied by the typical cherry tea - one of her few preferences - the Harbinger diligently wrote like there was no tomorrow, at a fast and precise pace. Alongside this, the sweet aroma of the tea didn't help to stop the parallel thoughts, sugary like the distant memories tormenting her thoughts today, dancing around her head and bringing to the surface what should remain guarded.

"You don't seem to understand anything about this." The x-shaped pupils reflected in the liquid served as a distraction from the constant boredom, or just a way of distancing herself from her surroundings.

Ah, yes. That's exactly what they used to do, tea parties prepared by children who had no idea how they worked. Brilliant.

"And what's there to understand? We just have to put tea in the cup and drink it then-" The rest of the words were like an incoherent buzz, proof of the vagueness surrounding these memories. "Let me show you. It's just like that-"

Splash.

"..."

Without her noticing, the tea had spilled on her white jacket, staining it a blood red. A pity, as it was such a pretty piece. Leaving that aside, her first action was to check for any burns and take it off to clean.

She would wash it with her bare hands in the laundry room, well away from the bedrooms so as not to interrupt anyone's sleep. Then she left the rings on the table and made her way through the house again, with no light to guide her. It was so chilly when the fire was extinguished. But she was used to it, and certainly so were the other residents.

"Freminet, you know that I can see you. Right?"

"P-Pardon." From the shadows emerged Freminet, face turned downwards as if he were hiding something and his usual shy attitude. He seemed to be desperately wiping away the tears flowing from his eyes; after all, Father didn't like it when children cried.

She turned around, looking away from Freminet. "You shouldn't be awake. Go back to your room and I'll let it slide this time."

"Yes, Father." Freminet fled the scene like a shadow. There was no intention of frightening him, only of warning him.

He was there before she became Father, although he was too young to possibly remember much of the events that led to her ascension. Well, he was a good kid either way.

Arlecchino didn't like tears, they were just a semblance of pain and weakness. She had already seen too much suffering in her life to hate them. They were a reminder of the suffering experienced and something she wouldn't like to see again.

But it didn't mean they couldn't cry by themselves. She only wanted them to be strong enough to defend themselves so not have to go through the horrors of the world, although she knows it's impossible.

"..."

How many times did Peruere wake up in the dead of night, in pain and agony as her curse only intensified? Inside, she wanted to let out an inhuman scream, which is a way of being heard in this fairytale-like hellhole.

The silence around her agitated her further and further, and in a numb state, she couldn't rest. At any moment, it was as if she would be eaten from the inside out by the curse inside her body.

"Hey, hey... Calm down, is everything all right?"

The pain she felt that day was real, but the comfort given to her was more markable. It hurt (and a lot), but no tears would dare to flow from her exhausted eyes, carrying a great deal of fatigue. "You're not going to tell Mother, right?”

“Not if you don't want me to.”

"Then don't.” She didn't want to be taken care of by her, so she was fine as long as the pain didn't kill her. "Although I don't think she'll stay in the dark about it for long."

“But won't Mother be mad if she sees us awake?” They sat on her bed, keeping distance enough to be able to jump quickly to their own in case the door opens.

The leather belt hanging on the side of the old clock was a threat for those who were bold enough to try to break the rules. All children should be in bed during the whole night, no exceptions. But no one could stop [Name] from doing what they wanted.

“If she gets mad, then I'll take the blame for you…”

“Then you're just gonna get hurt!” They left an incredulous whisper. There was no way she would do that, right?

“And won't you?”

“Honestly, I'd rather be beaten than grounded.”

In a way, being hit would be better because it would happen once and then they could heal for the next few days. Since they weren't doing anything too serious, the punishment wouldn't be so bad.

But being grounded was the worst thing that could happen to a child inside the House. Or they would get excruciating tasks during weeks, or have their freedom taken away as if it was nothing. And [Name] certainly didn't like being stuck in a dark room with little light for days.

“I don't think there's a better option between those two…”

"You need more rest, you know that?" Arlecchino could no longer feel the comfort of those hands. But she was sure it was a gentle touch, because she didn't feel repulsed. "I don't understand why you accept to go through all this pain alone..."

"Because only pain breeds understanding—"

Mother's motto, a phrase repeated over and over again as a justification for the punishments handed out. Painfully engraved in children's minds as a survival rule.

"No, no, no, no, no," the hurried voice tried to silence the other. "Shh, shh. It's not like that, stop thinking like that."

"If you want to talk, then talk. If you want to cry, then cry... For the archon, if you even want to kill, then kill! But don't accept things so easily! It's so frustrating!"

Their whispers were angry, but it was clear that the anger was not directed at Peruere. In any case, she felt a little guilty about making someone take care of her.

“I don't believe that's exactly how it works—” she answered, grabbing her arm as it itched from under her skin. The simplest movement of Peruere's fingers was enough to make them snap and the sound echo through the room.

“Can I see your arms? Or is it still hurting a lot?” They wouldn't do anything without Peruere's permission. Even though they hated seeing her like that, they would respect her boundaries just like she respects theirs.

“You can…”

They gently gave her a gentle massage, trying to help that overbearing pain to go away. Peruere tried to think of something she could say to thank her friend without the typical “thank you”. Her lack of expression was a bit frustrating.because she didn't want to come out as ungrateful, but couldn't think of the right thing to say.

“Hm… thank you…” She ended up saying the same overused words, and was about to apologize when she saw the droplets of water drip down their face. How weird, for it was the first time someone had cried for her, and the first time she had been hugged so tightly.

“It's really okay… I just want to see you well.”

"Come on, you know I care about your well being." The embrace that enveloped her was as warm as an ember, and helped her hide the shame on her face. "You're not going to take my advice, are you?”

"No."

"Haha... You're so stubborn." Wiping away their tears, [Name] released Peruere's cheeks.

The scene didn't last long. It was all because they were careless enough not to notice the person standing there in the doorway, watching with a neutral, expressionless face. They were taken by surprise like two rabbits in a trap.

“Peruere, [Name], go to the Hearth room. I wish to see the two by the morning.”

That tricky grin that appeared on the woman's face never failed to confuse Peruere. Mother knows best, so why… Why was Peruere starting to slowly doubt her conduct?

The two could only stare back and low their head in respect — no, fear. Whispering the same thing in unison, they silently made their way to the door.

“Yes, Mother.”

During the daily routine, the Knave set aside a part of the evening to get together with the orphans by the fireplace. A family activity that built their companionship and teamwork for future missions, certainly not an excuse for them to have the playtime they needed while growing up.

She usually sat in the furthest seat, watching them talk in their jovial, relaxed language. These young people today... she was sure that these dialects were not part of the vocabulary used during her youth.

Generation by generation, they would have to fight their way to the top. But now, she hopes that this chain is broken and plans for her method to continue for a good few years after her title passes on.

Lyney. He was the most likely to take over as King, although she still doesn't believe he's fully ready to take on the challenge. He was a kind-hearted child, but he needed to evolve so that he had what it took to abandon childlike ways and embrace a different reality forcefully.

In a way, someone had to suffer so that others could survive. Whether it was selfish for her to be the one to choose that person or not is a matter for another discussion. But just the thought that most of these children could become adults already appeased Arlecchino's heart.

As she closes her eyes and contemplates the sound of the fire crackling and the laughter of those around her, alongside the moonlight, Arlecchino's mind drifts to the past once again.

Just for a second...

“What is it exactly that you want, Peruere?”

"I wish for the same as the others." Everyone is waiting for the moment when they will compete for the position of King, aren't they? After all, that's the goal. "But what about you? What do you want?"

"All I know is that I know nothing. Stupid,. isn't it?"

Click.

The opening of the window completely dispelled those thoughts of Peruere, who was absentmindedly observing everything. Ahead, [Name] took in the cool breeze and the warmth of the sunset rays that touched their face, now clear and fresh in the Knave's mind.

Carelessly, already characteristic of them, [Name] climbed onto the windowsill. "I don't want to be King, or Mother, or Fatui or... anything."

Although the light touched every inch of the room, it was as if Peruere remained in the dark. There, hidden in the shadow cast by [Name], she looked away.

The hand outstretched to her, how could she possibly forget it? The hesitation to grasp it would forever be one of her greatest regrets, as would all the words that went unsaid. Peruere's cold, disconnected manner had often been the best weapon she could use, but also a major flaw.

"I want to be... free."

"..." Without an answer, her gaze only followed [Name]'s raised hand, pointed at the sky - more precisely, two birds hovering there.

"Tell me, Peruere..." the dramatic pause, their eyes still full of tears. Everything contributed to the melancholy of the moment "Will we ever be like them?"

"..."

Freedom. Peruere never had never truly believed in it. There is no such thing as true freedom, never has been and never will be. Does being free mean having autonomy? What nonsense, at the end of the day everyone is tied to their ideologies and beliefs. The two of them were no exception.

[Name] was like a resilient flame that lit up the frigid walls of the House of Hearth, bringing an air of change and perhaps hope wherever she went. On the other hand, Peruere was a... moth, yes, a single moth that belonged in the darkest corners of the night. Their flaw was clearly their ego. From an outside view, not in a million years could [Name] become King. However, something was burning inside those hopeful yet stubborn eyes, an even greater ambition.

Undeniably, Peruere felt slightly confused about them. They were a source of trouble, that was a fact. But then, why was she increasingly tempted to go against the rules with them?

"Don't dream too much. Freedom is too distant a utopia for us." She offered [Name] her hand in return, helping them down from the window.

"But aren't you curious? Maybe... maybe the world isn't as small as in here."

"And if it isn't? Will it make any difference? Either way, we'll still be chained up like the good dogs we are."

"Hm..."

"Look at me." The seriousness in [Name]'s gaze surprised me. There was no longer that silly smile on their face, nor did their voice carry the same casualness, just the seriousness needed.

"If you're going to be King, do it properly."

The metallic smell of blood no longer bothered her - she'd been feeling it long enough to get used to it. And the disgust at being stained with Crucabena's blood was tremendous, and the emptiness of the corridors was a stark reminder of the massacre that had taken place there, since at that moment, only Peruere's deep footsteps could be heard.

Did [Name] manage to get out? Surely those who survived had gone into hiding somewhere, so Peruere made a point of searching every room from top to bottom to make sure that none had been left behind from the first search. There was no longer a Mother to run to, one monster had just devoured another in the great food chain that shapes the structures of the House of Hearth.

The bloody marks on the wall gave Peruere an ominous feeling. But now, the goal was different: to find [Name]. With everything that was going on, she was sure that the other would fulfill the agreement they had made. If [Name] wasn't there, then they had successfully escaped. So Peruere ran from where she was to the fireplace room.

And [Name] did as said. They laid there, leaning against the fireplace as if seeking the comfort of the flames. But what she didn't expect was the large open wound in their chest, which they held in distress at the pain caused.

And of all the memories Arlecchino could have, this was undoubtedly the freshest and most agonizing. It plagued her mind like a broken record, repeating itself over and over and over again.

That was the first time she didn't feel fear, but pure dread. Hidden by the serious face, her heart was restless from the sudden rush of adrenaline until her face paled like paper and her eyes widened as if they were going to pop out, for the person standing there was about to die.

"Y-You... did you... do i-it?"

She nodded in agreement, before kneeling down next to them. Peruere couldn't hide her nervousness, unconsciously biting her lower lip to keep it all in; because [Name] didn't deserve to see Peruere in the state her mind was now in.

"Y-You got really... hurt, h-huh?"

With one hand, they stroked Peruere's cheek. This time she remembered the feeling of the fingers getting colder and colder and the weakness that made them tremble, which was why she removed the other's hand from her face.

"[Name]..."

"I wasn't quick enough... I-I-"

"Shh... spare the words."

Peruere took them in her arms, supporting their head as she tried to calm her down - they were already calm enough, it was Peruere herself who needed it. She already understood that death would tear one more person away from her as the flames warmed them, at least for now.

"T-Talk to me, please. I don't want to die in the silence… A-All this quietness is torturing me…" their voice had already become a desperate whisper while they clutched to Peruere tighter, as if they needed her — and they did.

Peruere wiped the blood dripping from [Name]'s lips, before thinking carefully about what to say. Breathing heavily, she began to sing. "Now it was fatal...That the make-believe would end up like this...

[Name]'s eyes widened one last time, before tearing up. But it wasn't out of sadness, as their smile remained and even grew. What a sight, for someone close to death to be reassured by so little.

"I thought... you didn't... like lullabies...?" They were gently interrupted by a finger over the lips.

"Beyond this yard... It's a never ending night..."

They felt their breathing slowly cease, the hand holding hers loosen, and the tears in their eyes flow. Poor [Name], they wouldn't see the end of the song, because they'd already be on the other side. "Peruere... T-Thanks... for being... my friend..."

"B-Because you disappeared into the world without telling me..." Never had Peruere's voice trembled so much. But she would keep singing, she needed to finish this melody for that one peaceful smile as if their life hadn't been taken so painfully, or she would regret it bitterly for the rest of her life.

"And now I was a foolish one asking..." she wiped away her friend's tears and closed their eyes, which reflected the starlight on the other side of the window. Now they would become just like a bird and know true freedom, while Peruere would remain a moth in the dark, without her flame to guide the way.

"What is life going to do with me…?”

#swanniesarchive <3 #genshin x reader #genshin impact #genshin platonic #fontaine #genshin x gender neutral reader #angst #arlecchino #arleccino genshin #arlecchino x reader #platonic Arlecchino x reader #platonic genshin x reader #platonic genshin impact #tw death #tw child abuse #tw blood #tw injury

[serverusslaype]

Shameless, pt. 15

Severus Snape x professor!reader fic

Shameless Masterpost

hey guys.................. dont kill me. i'm so sorry for the incredibly lengthy hiatus.... i had no motivation, each time i opened the file to type i'd type a couple words, maybe a paragraph and close it. i finally found the motivation to finish this chapter recently, i'm hoping it stays. it's been a rough couple months, so hoping this can help me feel a bit better!!

i felt really guilty for sort of abandoning the fic where it was, but i couldn't force myself to write anything, there was no creative juice, i think i sort of burnt myself out. and for the previous posts saying i was back, i thought i was, but i'd have the smallest spark of inspiration and try to write, but then nothing happened, and i felt bad so i didn't want to say something like, sorry, i lied. :(

hopefully this chapter is okay, i know most of you won't like it, but i'm so glad i finally finished it, it was one of the hardest to write because i had so many ideas on how it'd end and effect the whole story itself, so i had to make sure it made sense.

i can't believe you guys are still here after so long, it made me emotional to see all of your asks and comments and likes, i was just floored to be honest, so thank you so much for your unwavering support. i love you all so so much. honestly. holy shit. this has been a journey. <3 i hope you guys are all doing brilliantly.

warnings: lack of snape, swearing, mentions of adultery, slight domestic violence, verbal abuse at the end

You didn't know where to go. You felt... lost. You couldn't exactly go back to your quarters, not with Ben there, you didn't need more questions about why you were crying your eyes out at this time of night. It's not like you could tell him the truth.

So, you did what anyone would: go for a midnight walk. Well, at least that's what you thought anyone would do when they had nowhere to go. You'd hoped that the fresh, cold air would soothe your burning lungs, and the gentle breeze would dry your teary eyes. In an even deeper, darker part of your mind, you also hoped that Black would find you. Perhaps that would make everything... easier.

With tears still streaming freely from your eyes and heavy feet, you padded towards the large, magnificent doors that led to the outside with your arms wrapped around your body tightly; trying your best not to breakdown until you were alone. Your hands were still shaking as you pushed them against the doors, opening it a tad as the cool wind blew through the crack and into your face. You gasped a little at the sharp breeze, but nonetheless you slipped out, and made your way into the courtyard. The temperature was a little more biting than you had anticipated, and so you squeezed your arms around yourself a little tighter, walking towards the infamous wooden, crooked bridge.

As you sauntered through the courtyard, the only noises you heard were the owls hooting in the distance, the gentle breeze brushing through the burnt-amber leaved trees and the faint clack of your heels against the cobblestoned ground. In all honesty, it did feel a little eerie to the say the least, but at this very moment that was the least of your worries. All you wanted was a little time alone to cry, or grieve what could have been with ...Severus.

Gods, it hurt to even think his name, let alone speak it.

You reached the wooden bridge, and you stopped in the middle of it; leaning against the intricately carved columns to gaze out at the highlands. The moonlight casted a gorgeous glaze-like reflection upon the Black Lake, and it twinkled beautifully, almost hypnotising you like an illusion. Your eyes flicked up to the moon and glanced around it, staring at the glittering stars surrounding it like a perfect painting. Only times like this did you miss teaching Astronomy. As your mind reeled back to your first year teaching at Hogwarts, you relished in the time where you did not know the man named Severus Snape, and suddenly your heart sank in your chest like an anchor dropped at sea. You were so naive back then, unknowing of what was to come.

As the memories of you and Severus flooded your mind like a dam breaking, you let yourself cry. You could still feel his lips on yours, his fingertips gently tracing the curves and grooves of your skin, the words he'd whispered into your ear - it was all there, stained on your skin, like a tattoo - or perhaps a branding. And now you had to live with it. You weren't sure if you'd survive this time, especially not with how deeply you felt for him. You were torn between pretending he didn't exist and trying to talk to him, perhaps even telling him how you felt, but truth be told you were petrified of how he'd react. Would he even look at you again with those glittering black eyes you'd come to adore so hopelessly? Would he dare speak to you again, knowing that he'd charmed you? Maybe he'd relish in the fact that he'd done so, take pride in bewitching you, and make you hurt for it. You knew Snape could be rather cruel, your school days here with him as your teacher was enough for you to know that.

All these unanswered questions swam through your head and you felt yourself becoming suffocated from them, and it suddenly felt as if your lungs had filled with water, drowning you. You sobbed helplessly as you slid down the wooden wall behind you with your hands against your face, the rough edges scratching your back through your clothes rather uncomfortably.

"Y/N?" A voice came from beside you, and you froze. You turned your head away from them and quickly used your sleeve to wipe your eyes, drying the tears that had fallen from them. Only one person has a voice as soft as the one you had just heard.

You gave yourself a moment to gather yourself before even attempting to use your voice.

"Hello, Remus." You croaked quietly, sniffling.

"What on Earth are you doing out here so late?" He questioned gently, and you heard him take a step towards you. "Are you alright?"

"Quite dandy," you sarcastically quipped, sighing deeply, "I'm brilliant..." You turned your head to face him, and immediately, his face softened at the sight of your own. You were sat up against the side of the bridge, knees up against your chest and your arms wrapped around them; nose and eyes red, wet with tears. Remus quickly dropped down to his knees beside you, placing a soothing hand upon your forearm.

"What happened?" Remus asked, careful to keep his voice quiet and soft. With empty eyes, you stared into his worried ones, and instantly you felt terrible. The last thing you wanted was people worrying over you.

You looked away, down at the ground. "I..." you mumbled, sighing, "it's a... long... story." You spoke slowly. From the corner of your eye, you saw a small smile quirk up on Remus's lips.

"I've got time, my dear." He replied as his thumb brushed your forearm, silently encouraging you to talk. You felt at ease in Remus's presence, it was almost like he had a calm aura around him, and naturally your body relaxed beside his. You took a deep breath.

"Erm," you choked, sniffling again, "it's Se... Snape." You couldn't bring yourself to say his first name without crumbling into a million pieces.

Remus let out a gentle breath. "Snape, of course," He tutted, glancing between you and the ground. "What's he done?" The fact that Remus reacted like he had expected Snape to have hurt you, further broke your heart. Were you the only one to have seen through his icy exterior?

"Broken my heart," You laughed dryly, and you had to fight back another bout of tears. Remus's brows furrowed in confusion at you. "We... I... Look, I'm not sure how to explain this to you. But... I fell..." You trailed off, unable to finish your sentence. Your heart hurt too much. You only hoped that Remus knew what you were about to say.

Remus blinked and stared at you, shocked. Clearly, the two of you had hidden your 'relationship' well - so well that everyone was oblivious to it. "You fell...?" He frowned.

"In love... with him..." You almost whispered, avoiding Remus's eyes. You weren't sure if you'd be able to handle the look in them.

"You're in love with... Severus?" Remus repeated, and you squeezed your eyes shut at his words. They were like daggers, stabbing your bleeding heart. It was almost like you could feel it trembling inside of your chest, begging you to free it from this cycle of torment. "But... Aren't you with... Ben? And... Severus... he's..."

"I know," you sighed, noticing his confusion, "I had feelings for Severus before I met Ben. And it sort of just, like, spiralled out of control, and now, erm, here I am- Gods, I should have just listened to Minerva, I wouldn't be here right now, hurting like this." You ranted, another strangled sob leaving your throat. Remus watched you, and his eyes softened. He felt terrible for you. "She warned me, Remus, why didn't I just listen to her?!" You cried, letting your head fall into your hands.

"Y/N," Remus whispered, reaching out a cautious hand to pry your face from your hands. With a soft gasp, you looked up with teary eyes, and he wiped a stray tear from your cheek. "We don't get to choose who we do and don't fall in love with. We follow our hearts blindly, most of the time, unknowingly." He said, and moved his hand from your wet cheek to your shoulder, rubbing it soothingly. "It's beyond our control who we love."

There was a moment of silence.

"...What do I do, Remus?" You sobbed softly, sniffling, looking at your knees.

"Have you told him?"

"No."

"I think you should."

"But what about Ben? Shouldn't I... deal with... that first?" You sniffled again. "And what if Severus doesn't feel the same way about me? Then what?"

Remus paused for a moment, thinking. You looked up at him. "What if he does?" He said, a small, comforting smile tickling his lips as he stared at you.

"Well- from the way he treated me earlier... I truly doubt it, Remus." You scoffed, glancing away from his pitying brown eyes.

Remus sighed, and you clenched your jaw. "Regret is a terrible thing, Y/N," he said, "it's such a short word, yet it stretches on forever." Your eyes were glued on the ground and your body was still, but your mind was running a million miles an hour.

You sat there in silence for a short moment, thinking deeply. Remus was right. You'd regret it for the rest of your life if you didn't tell Severus how you felt. That chance of him reciprocating your feelings was small, but it was still there. If he didn't feel the same, fine, you'd move on. Eventually. And if he did?...

"...Alright," You nodded sheepishly. "I'll tell him. I just... need to, erm, work out when and more specifically, how. Like, do I just straight up blurt it out? Work my way up to it? H-how do you know it's the right time?" You rambled with tears still falling from your eyes, glancing through them at Remus who sat beside you with a soft expression upon his features.

"You'll know." Was all he said before slowly standing and holding out a hand for you to take. Graciously, you took it, and Remus pulled you to your feet. "Feel better?" He hummed, casting a glance out at the moon, then a worried look suddenly struck his eyes. You noticed and frowned slightly at his behaviour.

The moon?

"A little." You forced a smile upon your lips, and lifted up a hand to wipe the remaining stray tears upon your red cheeks. Remus looked back at you, and returned your smile. "How come you were out so late?" You asked curiously, brushing off his odd reaction to seeing a moon.

"A walk in the night does me good," Remus shrugged, and began to walk back towards the castle with you beside him. "Clears my head."

"Ah, well, I suppose I'm glad you found me, then." You chuckled awkwardly, folding your arms against your chest.

Remus smiled at you and placed an arm around your shoulders, giving you a squeeze. "Let's get you back to your quarters, Y/N, you look like an ice block." He hummed and lead you back to the castle, but not before throwing another glance over his shoulder to the almost-full-moon.

Faint, footsteps trailed down an empty corridor, and a billowing black cape followed with it. As Severus marched, his chest felt horribly heavy, almost like there was a boulder chained to it, weighing him down. He couldn't figure out why he felt like this, and it was starting to make him a little irate. He knew it was something to do with you since it had started after you'd stormed out of his office.

As Severus was about to round a corner, the sound of familiar, sweet laughter rattled through his bones, and immediately he froze. Without a doubt, he knew it was you. Only you could have laughter that sounded like the sweet songs that birds chirped in the summer mornings. The breath in his lungs suddenly vanished and he quickly swooped himself behind a bookcase, poking his head out from the side of it to see who you were with.

The moment you appeared, that boulder chained to his chest became heavier, and he felt himself lean against the bookcase he hid behind. Severus's eyes widened as they glued themselves to the man beside you - Remus Lupin. His blood boiled at the sight.

What could have Lupin have said to make you laugh like that? He'd only heard you laugh like that when you were with him, not Lupin.

From a distance, he couldn't make out what the two of you were talking about, but it was obviously hilarious. Severus's jaw clenched as he watched Lupin place a hand upon the small of your back, guiding you.

Guiding you... inside your quarters?

Snape hissed silently to himself as he stared, his sharp and hardened eyes welded to the back of Lupin's head like molten metal. As your door shut, Snape could only huff in disgust with bared teeth. What were the two of you doing in there? It was past midnight and you and Lupin seemed happy as Larry to go into your quarters. Snape couldn't bear the idea of you and Lupin alone together - let alone the fact that Lupin had had his damned, grubby paws on you. Severus clenched his jaw in a violent fashion, very clearly upset at how you'd moved on so quickly, especially with another professor at Hogwarts. Was this your thing? Bewitch every lonely professor that you laid your wretched eyes upon and then move onto the next? Did it make you feel better about yourself in some fucked up way?

An uneasy, bitter feeling twisted inside of his chest as he pictured the two of you alone and he whipped around out of spite; the swoosh of his long, black cloak filling the silent hallway. How could you move on so quickly, so... easily? 

"Never did I think I'd see the day that someone told me they fell in love with a man like Severus Snape." Remus laughed softly as he waddled to your sofa, glancing at you as if to ask if it was alright to sit. You nodded at him.

"And yet here we are." You hummed with a flat mouth, clearly not as amused as your friend was. "Sometimes I wish I was as emotionally guarded as he was, but then I remember how bloody miserable that would be." You mumbled, earning an abrupt laugh from Lupin who'd settled on the couch with a soft sigh.

Ben was nowhere to be seen, so you assumed he was asleep in the bedroom.

"Severus is an interesting character, most definitely," Lupin nodded and you turned around, walking towards him to join him on the sofa. "And I applaud you for being able to tame him. If it's any consolation, only one other woman had been able to, though I think it was... unintentional, if you will."

"Unintentional?" You questioned, your tone curious. Though almost instantly, that curiosity was killed as the thought of Severus with another woman stabbed at your fragile heart. "Actually, I'm not sure if I want to hear this right now." A dry laugh slipped from your lips and you exhaled sharply as another wave of tears prickled at your waterline.

"Alright." Lupin said softly, taking notice of your quivering voice. He stood up with a breathy groan and shuffled towards you, slinking an arm around your shoulders to pull you into his chest. It was calming, and the way he hugged you reminded you of all the times your parents would comfort you as a child. As Lupin gave you a supportive squeeze, it was as if he'd accidently pushed the button for the waterworks - hot tears began to stream down your cheeks once again, and you sobbed quietly into his wrinkled shirt.

"Hey," Lupin sighed as he watched your shoulders shake with sorrow. His hand sat on the top of your arm, squeezing it gently: a dire attempt at consoling you. "Don't cry, Y/N, it'll pass."

"Idon'twantitto-" You mumbled into his shirt, sniffling loudly. Lupin's brows furrowed together in confusion as he paused for a brief moment, silently trying to decipher what you'd just said.

"What?" He asked gently, leaning his head down so he could hear you a little better. You lifted your head from him, sighing, another heartbreaking sniffle sneaking out of your reddened nose.

"I don't want it to." You repeated yourself, lifting a hand up to wipe your wet eyes lazily.

"I know. But it will." Lupin sighed too. "Severus is... a very... damaged man," He cringed slightly at his choice of words, but he continued, "I'm not even sure that you could help him- or fix him."

At this point, you were staring soullessly at the floor, and the only thing you could feel was Lupin's chest against your shoulders. Were you and Severus really a lost case? You felt like you'd made so much progress, he'd opened up to you, he'd... he also ran away again. Perhaps your friend Remus is right.

"I think I want to be alone." You suddenly blurted out, slowly glancing up at the professor with glossy, red eyes. Lupin blinked at you, confused for a moment, though he quickly came to. He didn't blame you for saying such a thing - you'd just had your heart ripped out, to put it simply.

Remus didn't say anything, he only nodded, offering you a kind, yet pitiful smile - and that hurt you slightly. You didn't want his pity, in fact, you didn't want anyone's pity. "If you need anything, you know where to find me." He muttered, brushing a hand through your hair softly. You shut your eyes for a moment and sighed, a small gush of guilt filling your body. Here Lupin was, trying to console you, and you're kicking him out. You hoped he didn't take it personally.

"I'm sorry, I... I just need to be alone." You quickly offered. Remus shook his head and frowned at you.

"No, I understand. See you in the morning, Y/N. Feel better soon." The professor smiled at you and this time it wasn't rich with pity, but kindness. He tipped his head at you and began to shuffle his way towards the door, opening it with a quiet creak from the oak. Before he disappeared out of your chambers, Remus turned around and smiled at you once more, slipping away.

Seconds after the door shut, a drowsy-looking Ben opened your bedroom door, popping his head out. He squinted at the bright light, clearly having just woken up. That settled your nerves slightly, since you'd just spoken about Severus with Remus, only a few metres away from Ben.

"Are you crying?" Ben yawned, his bushy brows furrowed in either confusion or annoyance - at this point you couldn't tell.

"No," You coughed and turned around to pretend to do something else as you wiped at your eyes. "I'm fine, go back to bed, Ben." A curt sigh fell from your lips, and almost immediately you heard footsteps padding closer to you. "I'm fine." You repeated, listening as his feet stopped behind you.

"What happened?" Ben asked, the tiniest hint of sympathy in his voice made you shiver slightly.

"Nothing, it was just a rough day at work, honestly. I'd rather not talk about it." Your brows shot together as you tried to keep the tears at bay, but you couldn't help but think about Severus as Ben placed a hand on your waist in an attempt to pry you away from the countertop and towards him. You didn't want anyone else's hands on you but his.

"Hey," Ben said softly, though it felt heavy in your chest. "It's work. It won't matter in a day or two." You were silent. "Y/N?"

"I need a drink." You muttered and forced yourself to look at Ben, cringing slightly as you walked past him and towards a glossy wooden cabinet in the corner of your chambers. You rarely drank, and if you did, it was to either celebrate something, or forget something.

Another uncomfortable silence fell on top of the pair of you.

"Want one?" You asked with no emotion in your voice.

Ben hesitated for a moment, his groggy eyes staring at the back of your figure, silently trying to deduce you. "...Sure."

You were going to regret this.

You'd changed into comfier clothes, more specifically a pair of forest green silk shorts and a matching camisole top. Sitting on the edge of your bed, you faced Ben as he was sat on the windowsill opposite you, nursing his glass of wine. After a few strong sips, the pair of you were chatting and reminiscing like old pals. "Remember that time when I turned Peter Kipling into a weasel in McGonagall's class?" Ben giggled drunkenly, elbowing you gently as you nodded with tears in your eyes, an amused grin spread across your face.

"Oh my- I forgot about that!" You wheezed, smacking your lips together. "Didn't you get... like... at least- like a month's detention for that?" You laughed, slurring, taking another sip of your glass of Elven wine. You winced slightly at the strong aftertaste as it burned your throat. That was to be your last drink, you couldn't take much more.

"Ohh, yeah, I d-id," Ben hiccuped, his laughter dying out as he sighed; his tired eyes falling onto you. Shuffling under his gaze, you felt slightly uncomfortable. A brief yet thick silence suddenly engulfed the two of you like a slow-burning fire. Ben stood from where he'd been sat, stumbling over to where you were, stopping just in front of your knees.

"I miss talkin' to you, Y/N." He sighed, taking his hand and placing it upon your cheek; carressing the apple of it with his rough thumb. The strong scent of alcohol on his breath made you gag a tad - you were drunk as well, but the smell of it wasn't pleasant, especially from his mouth.

Your breath hitched slightly at the sudden contact.

"..Yeah." You answered quietly albeit awkwardly as you stared up at Ben. Though, all the wine you'd consumed was making him look like someone... else - the darkness wasn't helping either, in fact it was fueling your hallucinations. The dark cast of a shadow from the lit candles behind him made his nose appear larger, and his cheekbones a little more pronounced.

Slowly, he crouched down until you two were eye-level, his hands slipping to your ankles. Your body stiffened slightly at the feeling. "Ben.." You warned, sighing as the drunk buzz and pleasurable tingle from the pads of his fingers was starting to cloud your mind.

"Whaat?" He whispered, heavy-lidded eyes still glued to yours as his fingers began to trail up your calves. Ben began to stand up slightly, pushing his face dangerously close to yours, and so you leant backwards to avoid him, your back gradually making contact with the bed. He shuffled forwards slightly, pressing a knee against the edge of the bed to balance himself.

You shouldn't be doing this, you knew that, but Gods, the alcohol was truly fucking with your morals and mind.

Would it hurt?

Just a little... taste...?

You shut your eyes as you became lost in the feeling; his fingers reaching the backs of your soft thighs, a breathy sigh falling from your lips. Slowly, you opened your eyes again as Ben's smalelr nose pressed into your neck, followed by his wet lips. You gasped as his hands found your torso, his fingers pressing a little too harshly into your flesh. 

Severus.

Memories of him suddenly flooded your mind like a reservoir breaking a dam, flushing out anything that didn't embody him. All the times Severus had attacked your supple flesh beautifully; pulling gorgeous moans from those pink lips of yours. Your brows furrowed together as your body silently yearned for his touch. It hurt.

You were stuck between stopping this and just shamelessly indulging in the dark, twisted fantasy of pretending that Ben was Severus. You were being so selfish. And yet, you didn't care, all of the emotional turmoil that you'd been through tonight was pushing you to the edge - all you wanted was the man who didn't love you, who only saw you as a quick fuck, maybe some midnight company. 

You shut your eyes again and tried your best to imagine him. With a sigh, you ran your hand up Ben's neck and into his hair, though it wasn't the same. You missed the way you'd tangle your fingers in his raven-black locks, gripping on it as he'd ravish your neck and breasts like some mad professional. Sighing frustratedly, you moved your hands down to his shoulders, expecting the rough, black fabric of Severus's robes, and yet you were met with the flimsy, thin fabric of Ben's white cotton t-shirt.

You felt so fucking pathetic.

Knock, knock.

You froze, eyes snapping open as quick as lightning. Was there someone at the door?

"Did you hear that?"

"Hear what?" Ben groaned drunkenly as he continued to kiss your neck. Unfortunately for him, the feeling had worn off the second you heard those knocks.

"The knocks at the door."

"You're.. imag-ining things, baby." Ben sighed and hiccuped once more, his uncomfortably hot breath on your neck made you shiver. At this point, Ben was much more drunk than you, and so with your remaining energy, you rolled him off of you. "Whoa- heey-!" He groaned as you slipped from underneath him, padding to the door. You didn't bother to check if he was alright, the only thing on your mind was who was at your door at this time of night.

Was it him? Did you want it to be him?

Reluctantly, you reached out your hand to open the door.

Nobody was there.

You frowned and leaned forwards, poking your head out to glance around. The corridor was empty, completely empty. That was incredibly weird, did you imagine those knocks? You sighed softly - perhaps you were a little disapppointed. Turning around, you shut the door, only to be faced with Ben sat sloppily in a chair with a face like thunder.

"Waitin' for someone?" He asked with a flat tone, his head lazily cocked to one side, still clearly drunk.

"What?"

"You know what I'm talkin' abou', Y/N." Ben said with the same tone, standing up, albeit unsteadily. You swallowed as he inched closer towards you, dragging his feet, your toes burying themselves against the hard wooden floor beneath your feet. "I know about the notes you kept. From him." He spat, pointing his finger at your face. Your heart instantly began to gallop; the pounding of its beats echoed in your ears like a harrowing scream in the night.

The notes...

"Excuse me?" You choked out, brows furrowing together in complete shock.

This was not how you wanted this to go down.

"I went through yer little drawers. In yer greenhouse," Ben scowled, his nose turning upwards in what you could only describe as disgust. "All of his little notes were perfectly preserved, and mine? Well-" Your mind was running so quickly that you could barely even listen to what he was saying - the fact that he went behind your back and invaded your privacy was the only thing sticking out to you as of right now. Your skin felt like it was on fire as the anger began to flood your veins.

"You went through my drawers, Ben?!" You yelled, shoving a finger in his face.

"That's the only thing you care abou'?! Not the fact that you secretly- obviously, have some sort of fucked up... thing for a man who treats people like they're the tiniest bit of shit on 'is shoe?!" Ben screamed back drunkenly as he bared his teeth, stomping towards you and smacking your finger away. "The fuck is wrong withya?"

You knew this could get ugly quite quickly, especially as Ben was drunk - a lot drunker than you. But at this moment, your anger was far too hot to even think about cooling things down.

You scoffed at him, your lips twitching upwards into a disgusted sneer. "What the fuck is wrong with you?! Going through my stuff?!" You shouted at him, taking a step backwards as he began to get a little too close for comfort. "That's not okay, Ben!"

"How long has it been going on?" Ben asked, his tone suddenly calm. That put you on edge.

You paused for a moment, pondering on his question. It was probably best that you didn't answer that. "We're done here, Ben." You clenched your jaw, silently readying yourself for some sort of explosion.

"How long, Y/N?!" Ben yelled. The way the whites of his eyes were basically screaming at you made you feel terrified. In this current moment, there was only one pair of arms that you wish you were being held in. The man in front of you backed you up to the door, and you could only stare at him, for your wand was foolishly placed inside the pockets of your robes hung in your bedroom. Tears burned in your eyes as the guilt you'd tucked away was finally waking up and holding your body hostage with it's incredibly heavy weight. "Did you fuck 'im? Is that why ya never slept wit'me for months? Because you were too ...busy being his fucktoy?" Ben slurred, his face red and lips wet with saliva from how he'd been shouting.

"Shut up!" You cried at Ben as the tears began to break free from you and run down your cheeks like melting diamonds. This was so not the way you wanted this to go. "Please, just stop!" You were sobbing at this point as his words pierced your heart, quickly reminding you of what Severus truly thought of you.

"Oh, fuck sake, stop with the cryin'," Ben growled, drunkenly shoving a hand into your shoulder, sending you barreling backwards and into the door. You winced slightly as the bone of your shoulder blade made contact with the metal bar on your door. "Whiny bitch, yer the one in the wrong, not me!" He grumbled with a heavy sigh, turning away from you.

"Shit, Ben-" You gasped as you leaned forwards and pushed yourself off of the door, however, a sharp and excruciating pain shot across your shoulder as you tried to move it. "What the hell were you thinking?!" You whined, stumbling to the countertops of your kitchenette to lean on it. Your shoulder was fucking killing you.

"Me? What was I fuckin' thinkin'?!" A sarcastic, manic laugh fell from his lips and immediately you regretted your choice of words. The man spun on his heel, and suddenly he donned a wand in his hand. Now, you were scared for your life. "You're one to talk... you know what... I'm going to have you fired... yeah... blacklisted. From every job in this fuckin' area! That'll teach you to be a whore!" Ben screamed the last word so loudly that you were sure every sleeping student and teacher heard it. Your jaw ticked, and you had to look away, your face painted an embarrassed shade of scarlet.

Your heart dropped at his words. No way was this happening.

"You can't do that." You whispered, tears still streaming from your eyes as you stared at the ground.

"I work at the Ministry, darlin', anything is possible."

"Fuck you."

"What did you just say t'me?"

"Fuck you!" You cried out hoarsely with one hand on your shoulder and the other gripping the countertop. An animalistic like growl fell from your ex-boyfriend as he stormed towards you, fury burning bright in his eyes. He raised his wand, and you squeezed your eyes shut, bracing yourself for some sort of spell to hit you.

"Stupefy!" A familiar voice commanded, the swish of a spell following it suit. Then, a loud thud.

Reluctantly, you opened your eyes to see Ben laying on the floor, unconscious in a pool of his own saliva. Your chest heaved with fear, and you were incredibly scared to look up to see who had come to your rescue. Frozen, you stood still in your place, though you could feel your knees beginning to buckle. Within seconds you were on the floor, sobbing uncontrollably, your lungs on fire from how harshly you were breathing. Merlin, you could've just died.

uh oh.. who saved her?

i'm sorry if you weren't tagged, i went through the majority of my notes and tried to find you all!! pls forgive me :( there was a lot due to my absence <3

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[stellariah]

comforting you when you have a bad day — headcanons

⊹ word count: 100 words (ish)/character ⊹ content: sfw, reader/MC is referred to as you/your, fluffy comfort. ⊹ warnings: none. ⊹ a/n: I hope you enjoy these very self-indulgent headcanons. Sorry - no Mephisto, Raph, or Thirteen. I don't feel I know them enough to write them well!

LUCIFER He'll do whatever he can to make the rest of your day easier. If anyone knows how upsetting it is to have more things piling up on your to-do list when you're already having a rough day, it's Lucifer – so all of those little things that pop up, he'll take care of before you even notice. Solomon set the kitchen on fire? Dealt with before you even got a whiff of smoke. Leviathan summoned Lotan in the bathroom again? If anything, you noticed the bathtub was absolutely spotless when you went to wash up at the end of the day. It's almost unsettling how smoothly the rest of the day goes. And just before you go to sleep, your D.D.D. pings.

Luci: Goodnight, my love. Get some rest so tomorrow can get off to a better start.

MAMMON

He knows something is up immediately. You could be the most stoic person in the universe, but Mammon would feel the change in your mood. He's not the best at talking through feelings, so he does what he does best: he'll stay close. Expect lots of little loving touches, if you're into it – resting his hand on the small of your back when you're walking, tangling your fingers with his when you're sitting together, a random back hug, a little peck on your cheek. He'll be blushing for the rest of the day. And if you're not into it, he'll just physically stay close to you. He'll also be extra protective - so help anyone that sours your mood further.

LEVIATHAN

Leviathan will distract you. He'll invite you to his room as soon as he's able to for an anime night or a gaming session or a manga reading party. He won't let you out of his sight (if he can!). He's very sensitive to shifts in your mood and behaviour, so he'll be sneaking little glances at you constantly so he can get a read on how you're feeling. If what you're doing together doesn't seem to help you feel better, he'll shift to something else. And if all of his usual tactics fail, he'll just ask you what would help. Levi isn't straightforward often, but when you're hurting, he'll work through his anxiety so he can do whatever helps you most.

SATAN

He'll be your shoulder to cry on, your listening ear, and your personal counselor, if you want and need all three. Satan knows how relieving it can be to just let it out, so if you need some comfort while you cry or scream or throw things around, he's your guy. He's also the best listener of the brothers, so if you're someone who needs to talk it out, he's there for that, too. And if you want some advice on whatever if troubling you, expect him to give you some very rational, carefully thought-out ideas on what to do. Like Levi, Satan would just ask you what you need and be that for you to the best of his ability.

ASMODEUS

Asmodeus has an emergency care kit prepared for you for days like this. Whatever you're usually up for along the lines of “self-care”, he'll have them pre-packed in a cute little box for you. Face masks, bath bombs, some good books or journals, your favourite songs or movies, a mani/pedi set – whatever you need to unwind, he's got it. If you want him around to relax together, he's got two fluffy bathrobes and sets of cosy pajamas ready to go. If you'd rather relax on your own, he'll drop off your care package at your door with a loving note tucked under the ribbon on the lid. It breaks his heart to see you sad and he hopes this little gesture of love helps you feel better.

BEELZEBUB

Like Lucifer, Beel just wants to make your day easier, but he'll be more upfront about it. He wants to make it obvious that he cares about you. With your permission, he'll carry your books and bag between classes or on the way home for you. He'll offer to take on your chores for the day. He'll run those pesky errands for you. He'll even help you with your homework if that would be helpful! Of course, you can also expect lots of snacks offered to you and meals brought to you. Would he peel an orange for you? Without a doubt. Beelzebub doesn't want your health taking a hit because of a really tough day, so he'll offer to help you take care of yourself.

BELPHEGOR

Belphegor knows that sometimes the best way to feel better after an exceptionally tough day is to have a really good sleep. He'll set up the most luxurious, plush nap nook you've ever seen just for you (and maybe him, too, if you're okay with having a nap together). All his favourite pillows and blankets and plushies are carefully arranged for maximum comfort. If you want, he'll cuddle you until you fall asleep, softly stroking your back to help you along. And if sleep continues to evade you, he'll make you a soothing tea or read you a book or even give you a gentle massage to encourage your body to rest.

DIAVOLO

You have had a huge impact on the Seven Lords, and on the Devildom as a whole, so it both hurts and concerns Diavolo to see you feeling low. Though he has an exceptionally busy schedule, Diavolo would make time so you can spend time together. While you're together, Dia will do whatever he can to make you smile or laugh, using his bright, jovial personality to its fullest. You can also expect a ton of reassurance and praise – he'll offer you little affirmations about how amazing you are and how much you mean to all of them (to him, especially).

BARBATOS

Barbatos is an expert in care by nature of his work, so he is the most equipped to care for you on your toughest days. He'll have whatever you need in less than the time it takes to exhale. He'll be extra attentive to you around routines, like getting ready for school or work or winding down for the day. Need help tidying your hair before you leave? Barbatos is an expert in hair care, step into his home salon. Don't have the energy to make a lunch? No worries, he's already packed one for you and dinner will be waiting for you when you get home. He may be the best masseuse in the universe, too, so if you're up for it, he'll give you a full body massage before you go to sleep.

SIMEON

Out of everyone, Simeon will be the most distressed by you having a hard day, but (other than maybe Satan) he'll be the most calm when trying to help you feel better. His presence is naturally soothing, so just having him around is enough to lift your mood a little. He'll stay close for as long as you want. Simeon is an ask, don't assume kind of person – he doesn't want to do things he thinks you'll find helpful and overstep. Instead, he waits for you to directly ask for help and watches you closely for non-verbal indicators of things he can do that he knows you'll appreciate.

SOLOMON

Solomon has a hard time sorting out his own emotions and recognizes he may not be the best to help you sort out yours, but he wants to help somehow. So, he drops little gifts for you. That pastry you were eyeing the other day at the bakery is waiting for you on your desk with a cute doodle on a sticky note beside it. A paper airplane lands on your desk and it unfolds into a sweet love note (bonus laugh when you watch Sol getting scolded by your professor). The newest book from your favourite Human World author is wrapped up (badly) and tucked under your pillow. He just wants you to know he's always thinking of you.

©stellariah 2024 | do not copy, repost, translate, or feed my work to AI

#obey me #obey me shall we date #obey me headcanons #obey me fluff #obey me lucifer #obey me mammon #obey me leviathan #obey me satan #obey me asmodeus #obey me beelzebub #obey me belphegor #obey me diavolo #obey me barbatos #obey me simeon #obey me solomon #om lucifer #om mammon #om leviathan #om satan #om asmodeus #om beelzebub #om belphegor #om diavolo #om barbatos #om simeon #om solomon #beelzebub is THEE orange peel boyfriend and you can't change my mind #don't ask why i think barb is an amazing masseuse i don't have an answer #that's just my *opinion* #anyway hoping anyone out there having a tough day has a better one tomorrow <3

[yanderes-galore]

Hello can I request a yandere concept between ennard (hope I spelled it right) with a reader who finds out the truth about them that they aren’t actually Micheal? It can be platonic or romantic I’m not good picking ( I hope you have a nice day btw!)

Sure! So sorry for the long wait, I hope it was worth it :(

Read this as a supplementary concept to this one

Yandere! Ennard with Darling realizing they aren't Michael

Supplementary Concept

Pairing: Platonic/Romantic

Possible Trigger Warnings: Gender-Neutral Darling, Obsession, Manipulation, Stalking, Body horror, Disturbing descriptions, Clingy behavior, Isolation, Implied kidnapping, Blood, Vomit, Forced companionship.

Let's be honest, at a certain point you can tell when Michael isn't Michael.

As his friend, you know him.

You've known his trauma and might have even been a childhood friend.

So when he disappears for a few days... and returns acting strange... you originally think maybe he's just sick or upset.

He doesn't seem to remember much about you... and while he looks like Michael for the most part...

It all feels too uncanny.

There's various issues going on that's described in the previous concept.

Multiple personalities, twitching, odd smells, purple skin, glowing eyes, mechanical whirring....

Ennard is unable to replicate Michael completely.

There's always something off.

It doesn't help that Ennard becomes obsessed... often stalking and visiting you in their tattered disguise.

Honestly, it won't take you long before you learn the truth.

You can figure it out yourself.

At first you had just been keeping an eye on Michael to make sure he was okay after his absence.

But now... as you notice the smell and uncanny nature... there's just no hiding it.

Ennard is aware of their time limit.

They just thought they'd have more time.

However, Ennard nearly freezes when you pull them aside.

They see the concern in your eyes, along with the fear when you're met with a glowing gaze.

"Michael... what's wrong?"

Ennard struggles with a response, doing their best to replicate Michael's speech once again.

"Nothing's wrong...?"

"Don't you dare lie to me!"

Ennard pauses at your sudden... assertive tone.

If they could sweat... they would.

"What do you mean?"

"You never went to the hospital to get checked, you don't seem right... and that smell! You smell like a... corpse."

Ennard twitches, making you jump a bit.

Corpse... you poor thing, too smart for your own good.

"... we thought we could enjoy you a little bit longer..."

"Michael" murmurs, looking saddened.

"We? What do you mean 'We'?"

"We aren't Michael... but we wish we were so we could stay."

Mechanical whirring echoes in the room as you notice Michael's purple skin tear.

You back up, nausea setting in as the smell gets worse.

Sickening snaps and rips echo in the room... blood pooling down and staining the... thing.

The sight makes you lurch over and vomit, the stress and smell squeezing your stomach in an uncomfortable vice.

Like some sort of stomach churning alien... Ennard emerges from the skin of your friend.

You nearly lose your stomach again as the mechanical beast stumbles forward... an amalgamated circus clown of robotic parts.

"We don't want to say goodbye..."

The robot murmurs sadly, stepping forward as you scramble to stay back.

"Maybe we don't have to...! Maybe you can stay...."

You go to try and leave, only for the mangle of parts to pounce.

Wires dig into your skin like claws... situating you in place like a trap.

Ennard's many mechanical eyes stare down at you.

They take in your scared expression and giggle.

"You're our friend now... we're so much better than Michael."

The robot coos towards you, grip tight and unrelenting.

"We'll be your friend forever... you just have to come with us."

You struggle the best you can, but the wires dig too deep.

"Your fear is funny... but don't be scared...."

You're walked towards the backdoor of your home, the robot giggling.

"We'll take you away... so It's just us and you! If you fight us..."

The robot hisses... turning you so you stare at their bloody face plates.

"We have other ways of keeping you with us forever..."

Your mind flashes to thoughts of Michael... and you learn it's better if you cooperate.

#yandere five nights at freddys #yandere fnaf #yandere fnaf sister location #yandere ennard

[thurio-edau]

SBG GANG MENTAL ANALYSIS

sorry for the delay!

alright, gotta say... this one's a bit shorter. but the next will come like a train wreck i promise😇

Part 3: Ben Clark

oh the sweet old Ben... a kind and loving soul muted away. I'm thinking of inspecting his trauma and his general actions, and give him a diagnosis which I'm sure is canon even. I'm sure everyone who knows the disorder itself is aware that Ben is, in fact, suffering from PTSD.

let's start. first, what is PTSD?

PTSD, or Post Traumatic Stress Disorder, is a mental condition where someone feels what they have previously went through in a past traumatic experience. PTSD is frequently found with flashbacks to the moment, overwhelming feelings and sudden responses. there are two types of this disorder, PTSD and C-PTSD. but we'll look in the first one for now.

Ben has always been a really kind character. ever since the beginning. more of a 'gentle giant' type of character, though we never see him talk. he's soft, he loves to help his friends and never does anything vulgar around them, including the phantom dimension. he feels nice when he gets praised even if he doesn't show it too.

the first time we see him getting flashbacks and his anger issues being visible is when we first see Barron's behaviour towards Logan. anything that includes actual bullying gives him flashbacks and his response is his anger issues unleashing.

in his backstory, Ben is shown that he's more of a shy type of person, but he loves singing. because his tall and intimidating appereance doesn't match his softness, a group of dumbasses try to 'fix' him which he rejects. back when Shane strangled him, is what he gets flashbacks to. it was something that changed his entire life, he had a passion for singing but he never did with his damaged voice. god knows how many times he was hospitalized when he was going around to fights because of his outburst of rage.

yep, rage. I'd classify his anger issues as the 'rage' type with PTSD. PTSD rage makes more sense to me than just normal anger problems. I've seen and lived with many people with anger issues, but none of them are similar to rage. anger problems in general are usually verbal, if you don't make them mad to a point they're all bark and no bite. but of course after a point the violence behind the generic anger issues can unleash (see Tyler)

okay, back to Ben and rage. rage is an extreme condition of anger, the person gets violent and their thoughts are clouded with the rage which makes them not think before doing anything drastic. but he's not very closed off about it either, actually. the time where he accepted Aiden to do the storytelling was before the first half of season one, the gang wasn't even that close.

this means that he saw them as actual friends so early on. probably before everyone. Ashlyn took her sweet time accepting the friendship, I'm kind of sure that Aiden didn't at first (see Tyler, yet again), Tyler also definitely didn't (as said by Taylor in season two premiere) and I think Logan has attachment/trust issues but that's for later. the only other possible person that might accept the group fastly is Taylor but with Tyler's influence so close to her, there is also a chance she didn't at first.

Ben was fine with his friends knowing his past. he put his earphones on because he didn't want to hear about it, or else he knew he'd get flashbacks yet again. I'm thinking that it could be diagnosed too. Aiden knows that it's not just a memory, it's flashbacks to Ben and he covers for him whenever he sees something that might trigger Ben. after learning the situation, Taylor also does the same. they learn the severity of his problems and are all fine with helping him.

another thing I'm sure of is that he's extremely attached to his friends. we know that everyone is close-knit, but Ben specifically. he might not speak but that doesn't mean that he doesn't enjoy their time. he does, fully. which is I think why he/his room was... like that in the facility, without any spoilers.

to say, the gang is more than just friends to him; they're his found family, where he feels like he belongs. they don't judge him for his silence there. they understand his past. they're not scared of him just because of the way he was built and they're not going to be either.

but what about his family?

families are one of the most important part of a character and their backstory. the family is what decides how they will live, act and even feel sometimes. then what about Ben's? where were they during his backstory?

yeah. Ben's rage causes something terrible to happen.

but it ends better for everyone. Ben gets the therapy he needed, starts to live with Aiden, makes the gang his friends and it actually goes well.

his parents?

we meet Naomi and William during Lily's birthday.

yes, Mike, Lily is goshdarn adorable.

first, I think Naomi and William aren't to blame. I think they did the best they could; they tried to help Ben, tried to help him get therapy, sent him to Aiden's place to help himself. then why didn't Ben's story stop?

Ben couldn't control his rage until their house got destroyed and he realized just how far it got. he sneaked out of the house, a lot of people seem to not see that detail. and they seem to be very caring, too.

they're amazing as a whole family, to be honest. even the little Lily doesn't care about her birthday getting wrecked, because she wants to help Ben and his friends. she indirectly helped Tyler extremely well, since the sedative idea came from her in the first place.

Naomi was the first person who brought up the whole 'we-are-seeing-phantoms' discussion and William didn't hesitate to talk about it. Naomi was also the first person to notice the phantoms when the worlds collided for a mere second.

and Ben himself has shown completely zero negative behaviour towards them. and Lily gets treated like a princess -even if she accidentally neutered Ben-

side note here, that Lily also really loves the family too. the way she cuddled Aiden when he died and came back was so cute to be honest.

so I don't think the family is anywhere to blame either. it was Ben who was strangled, Ben who fought, and Ben who saw therapy. the reason why I'm talking about this is because a lot of people suddenly blame a character's family when there's a problem with them.

guys. people with caring, loving families can be traumatized too. just because someone has a happy family doesn't mean they're suddenly over any trauma they live. doesn't mean everything is suddenly okay. it means that they have an accepting place to go to, a safe space. and Ben's family? I think they're just like that. they desperately try to help. help their son, their nephew and their friends. hell, Lily trying to help also speaks volumes in my opinion. their father -dilf no.2 after Mike right here- William was the one who offered the idea to get the kids saved from the centipede phantom. and to be honest? it was pretty smart.

she also tried to prevent Emma from going mad because come on, Emma would absolutely wreck anyone if they dared blame Ashlyn for this. (still I think Jessica has to apologize for being to insensitive smh)

Naomi really seems like a sweetheart to me, I already said what to be said about William in a single very important side sentence and if there was any kind of in-family neglect Lily would also be affected. but she isn't so I think we're good? I adore the whole Ben family tho.

to wrap it all up.

Ben is suffering from Post Traumatic Stress Disorder which makes him see flashbacks and turn into a rage mode each time he is triggered due to his backstory, being bullied because he's too soft. his rage causes a gang to destroy his home (HELLO?? ARE THERE NO FUNCTIONING COPS IN THIS STOR-- oh wait it's america yea there ain't nvm) and his parents try their best. move, get Ben to therapy and let Daniel's side help him by doing stuff he loves. Ben is still trying to recover, but his flashbacks are strong due to impacting his entire life from his voice and make it difficult.

(vocal chords repair by time actually, but he hasn't been speaking for like 4 years so maybe it'd need some voice exercises until it returns to normal?? if it's just vocal chords he'd be alright. imagine if he could talk and sing normally all this time but he just didn't know. it's something between "aww poor guy :((" and "lmao"

but I don't know about voice box, can someone enlighten me on vocal chord damage vs. voice box damage? thamks)

and Lily. Lily is a cinnamon roll. no other opinions allowed.

-i wanted to make a part for Ben and Taylor but i decided wasn't fit here :P-

#sbgblr #sbg (webtoon) #school bus graveyard #school bus graveyard webtoon #schoolbus graveyard #sbg #sbg ben #ben clark

[spicyclover]

No one can hurt you

Summary : A dinner of revelation and tragedy.

Hope you’ll enjoy it. Let me know in the comment section.

Thank you! :)

Lots of love, xxx Spicy Clover

DISCLAIMER : Rewrite and final version of "All the things you said" | Netflix show: One Day at the Time | Elena’s Story part | Season 3, ep 2.  WARNING: mention of physical and verbal aggression! Su*c*de WARNING !R@PE! WARNING: mention of SU*C*DE WARNING TOUGH CONTENT, BE AWARE

DISCLAIMER:  This story is fiction and has no correlation with reality. All site names making acts, violence or any other type of aggression are used for artistic purposes, and they did not commit those acts

If you need help. Please get help. You are loved, and your life is valued. Even if you don’t see it, you are loved.

The Monaco Grand Prix is in a few days and you will be slowly preparing for tonight’s dinner. Charles decided to organize a small evening for the pilots and their respective companions. It is in a magnificent hotel overlooking the sea that Charles booked the room and privatized the chef of the restaurant. The luxurious life of Monaco in its greatest fullness, you are always amazed by all the secrets that this small principality shelters.

You were third-wheeling your best friend Heidi to that party. She and Daniel invited you after running into you in the afternoon at the marina. Since you were little you know most of the pilots. So you are happy to have been invited to celebrate this new year of racing in Monaco with them. The evening was going well until the subject of the conversation crumbled into something darker.

“I gotta admit, I’m getting kind of confused.” Ends up saying, Checo rubbing his nose with his glass. 

“Oh, my god, me too. What if someone says, “I am not sleeping with you tonight?” And then... an hour later, they’re like, “Eh, fine.” What’s that?” Ask Lando, completely confused. 

“Unsurprising,” Pierre whispers under his breath, laughing. You laugh at with him, ignoring Lando's thunder.

“How many women have said, “Eh, fine”?” Questions Heidi sarcastically. 

“Yeah, I got to make some calls.”

“Now I’m perplexed.” Says Max trying to make sense of everything he heard. 

“I know. It’s confusing. I hate to admit it, but I feel sorry for men. This consent thing is tricky.” Kelly responded and gets up to pour herself more wine. 

“No.” You exclaim annoyed by her comment. “Women always blame themselves, and then the man never has to take responsibility. During rape prevention week at the university, all the signs are aimed at women. “Girls, don’t dress provocatively. Girls, don’t walk alone.” How about, “Hey, guys, don’t rape.”" You look up at Pierre knowing perfectly it will trigger him.

“Oh, my god, why are we talking about that? I took a couple pictures as a joke, and Cece thought it was funny.” Pierre exclaims as he gets up from his chair to get himself another beer at the bar. 

“Did she? Or did she feel like she had to laugh ‘cause she doesn’t know what else to do with your hand on her boob?” Everyone around the table falls silent and waits. You get up from your chair and walk you way to Pierre.

“Ok, sweetie, take it easy.” Adds Sebastian taking your arm and tries to calm the conversation.

“No. He thinks what he did is cute. You are basically a predator.” You accuse, pointing your finger at him. 

“You’re basically a psycho.” Pierre replies, knowing full well it will trigger you.

“Good, call me crazy for defending a woman’s right not to be groped!”

“You’re mad ‘cause the internet told you to be. You don’t know my life or even leave this apartment!” Pierre screams as he approaches you.

“Because of guys like you!” You answer with the same intonation. 

“What are you talking about?” Charles asks, taking your hand for you to sit down.

You and Charles are special. You’ve been like ass and shirt since childhood. You’ve known him since you were six. For as long as you can remember, Charles has always been one of your dearest childhood friends. You have shared so much together. No one has ever made you vibrate like he does. Usually his simple touch makes you calmer and reassuring. But you are no longer able to appreciate this contact that you cherish so much.

“You want to know?” You said, scoffing. “Okay. A couple of weeks ago, Heidi and I were coming home from the movies, and we were holding hands. And we noticed these guys staring at us, and then we changed the sidewalks , and they followed us.” You speak with tears in your eyes. 

“What?” Sebastian says concerned in his voice. His turn your body to him.

“Yes. And they were going, “Come one, you guys, kiss. We really wanna see it. Just kiss.” They thought that was really funny, too.” You continue telling while drinking a sip of your glass.

“It was actually terrifying.” Ends up adding Heidi after Daniel stares at her intently. 

“It was terrifying. And then we finally lost them in a crowd and ran home...” You finish in a huff trying to hold back your tears. Your hand hides your eyes and you try at best to find your calm.

Charles, in his divine goodness, hastens to extinguish you warmly. At first, his touch hurts you and you have only one desire to remove his hands from your dirty body. Yet you cling to him like a lifeline. Deep down, you know it's time. Time to tell what happened that night, a year ago. Nobody dares to speak at your revelation and everyone feels guilty for not knowing sooner.

“Umm... Last year after the Monaco Grand Prix. Lance Stroll raped me. He was my friend, and he raped me in my own bedroom. And then, he threatened me not to tell anyone... but. Why did he do this?” You ask breaking down in tears. “Sorry, I don’t know what to say. I don’t know what... I feel.” 

“Why didn’t you say anything?” Sebastian asks tenderly, approaching you rubbing his hand on your back. 

“I tried, but... nobody listened to me.” You respond looking at Lando through your tears. Your eyes pierce Lando’s being. He doesn’t know where to put himself and his cheeks become red. He implores you to keep your mouth shut, but the situation no longer belongs to you. You feel the body of Charles being redeemed against yours and you notice that he followed your gaze.

“You knew.” He accuses Lando turning his attention abruptly towards him.

“I... I.” He tries to defend himself. “I didn’t know what to do.”

“Oh, you think she knew what to do either.” He yells, getting up from his chair and grabbing him by the collar. 

“Charles, let him go!” Orders Carlos. 

“You let her suffer silently when you knew what he did to her. I thought you were better than this. T’es qu’une grosse merde.” You’re a piece of shit

“Oh please, like you would have done something? We all know he’s untouchable and has done it before.” Admitted Lando, pushing Charles away. 

“What?” Sebastian speaks up. This is the first time he has heard this from his former teammate. He never thought he would ever see Lance in this light.

“Nothing.” 

“It’s nothing? He raped her, and now other girls too?” Charles advances again, preventing him from fleeing the situation.

“Don't play fouls, Charles. You were in his hotel room at the party in Abu Dhabi last year, and I quite remember your hands on some teenage girls, groping them.” He said suddenly, pushing Charles out of his way again.

“What?” You speak up, troubled by Lando's affirmation.

“It’s not what it looks like.” Charles turns to you, trying to explain himself. You get up from your chair and walk back as you see him approach.

“Don’t touch me.” You say, pushing him away. “Did you do it?”

“I... It’s not the same thing.” He justified himself.

“Yes. It actually is. Did you grope those teenage girls or worse raped them?” You ask scandalized. Charles, your best friend, your confidant, the one you most trust is capable of the same thing as the person who hurt you the most.

“Oui,” he admits in a small voice. “I didn’t want to.”

“You didn’t want to? What the fuck, Charles. What's wrong with you all?” You yell, taking your stuff and leaving as fast as possible. 

The thought of all this happening to so many more makes you sick. How could nobody speak up about this? You walk down the hotel hallway. You can hear footsteps and Charles's voice telling you to come back. When you get to the lobby, you ask for a taxi home. Tears fall down your cheeks, and you look at him as you push the door out. 

You take your taxi and give him your address. All you want right now is a shower. A warm and reassuring shower. To pull away all those memories and thoughts. You want to scream to the world. You want to smash your entire apartment down. You want to stay in bed for the rest of your life. You want to jump off the roof. You want to cut yourself so that the pain stops. You want to be set free.

You arrive at the complex. Your dark thought runs in circles in your head. Like a robot, you open the door, press the elevator, and finally unlock your apartment. You let your essentials fall on the ground with your bag and coat. Like a machine, you take your shoes off and open the lights. 

The sight of your home, which does not feel like home anymore. Since Lance pushes himself into you while you try to make him go away, this place hasn’t felt like home. You can’t even sleep in your own bed anymore. No matter how many times you clean the sheets, change the bed. This memory comes running back into your mind. Invade you like a parasite. 

You go to the bathroom and open the valve to fill the bathtub. You watch the water. You can hear your phone blowing up with notifications and calls. “Why does this world have to be this cruel?” You think, taking your clothes off. 

Your body envelops itself in the heat of the water, and you close your eyes. Your body slips in the bath. You head underwater. You hear focusing on your heart bit. You enjoy this moment of quietness and solitude. 

That’s it. You feel alone since that night he took your joy, your life, yourself. 

You can feel the water pressure you to gasp for air. Your head starts popping your blood. Your heart rises to find oxygen. You struggle. You have been struggling this long. You want to go, and you want to let go. 

You let the water go in, and suddenly, all the scary parts disappear. The explosion in your head fades away, and you’re not scared anymore. You find it relatively peaceful. Very peaceful. 

Strangely, you’re dreaming. Him with you. On a boat. Feeling the breeze in your hair. The warm sun on your skin. His light touches on your thigh. His breath on your neck. His lips are on your breast. You’re daydreaming. Are you? Is your mind trying to ease the pain in your heart? Is it even the day? 

Then. You open your eyes. You try to scream, but your head is under the water. You feel weak but strong. Sick but healthy. Chaos but at peace. You can feel your body wiggling, but your mind is different. No one can hurt you now. Quietly, your eyelids become heavy again, and what a moment ago hurt you the most now makes you feel good.

The water fills your lungs, and you sink more and more into the darkness. Nobody seems to pull you up. The seconds pass, but you no longer find the courage to go out. The bathtub disappears, and you find yourself in the sea. In a warm and welcoming sea; The Mediterranean. An infinity of blue. An infinity of sweetness. The noises are only deaf sounds, and you feel your brain more and more calm. The sun’s rays pass through the water, and you move further and further away from it. Your eyelids become more and more stretched.

Then you see beautiful blue eyes through the water. No fair. You can’t reach them but can’t stop staring at those ocean-blue eyes. Suddenly, you feel scared. Scared to leave those ocean eyes. You’re afraid, and you’re drowning under the waves of words you haven’t said to them, to you. 

You try to fight back this peaceful state, but darkness is an easier path than light. Suddenly the silence suffocates you, and you miss the sound surrounding you. 

Then comes the darkness.

When you leave the apartment, Sebastian watches Charles running after you. He can’t believe what has happened. He doesn’t want to consider it. How could he? He sees and goes to the door, and Charles is defeated on the ground. He passes by without a look and walk his way to the lobby. 

You have always been a fragile child. Even when you were a child. You were always this little fragile and precious porcelain doll. You’ve never been afraid of anything growing up. Sebastian always loved to see you grow up with him. Despite your age difference, he always considered you his little sister. The little one who needs to be protected from everything and at any cost. Knowing that you are suffering so much hurts him.

In the hallway, the walk seems long and endless, his thoughts wandering toward your shared memories. He remembers many summers spent in the countryside. At your grandparents' meadow, there was a vast field with a few horses grazing on the fresh grass. He remembers that beautiful-eyed little girl running in his direction.

You had dirt all over your clothes. Your hair was braided, and he still remembers the grass sticking in it. He remembers your laughter, which lit up the prairie thousands of miles away. Hearing you laugh has always been his favourite thing about you. Lost, it’s only when the doors block his way out that he remembers he has to go looking for you. He runs through the night towards your apartment.

Charles is devastated. Everything he tried to build with you has just broken in a moment. He feels lonely and ashamed. He wants you to know how much he loves you. How much you mean to him. How much you have become the center of his universe.

Before you, there was racing, and that was it. When you became something more his life change. It was as if you had lit the dormant fire in him. You have extinguished the flame since the death of his best companion, his father. You have given meaning to this quest. The stakes are not won but won for you.

He still remembers the first time he took you to his garage. You were with Sebastian. He was showing you around the Ferrari factory, showing you the different facilities, different parts. You were so captivated by his words, and your eyes were shining like stars in the sky. 

He remembers the moment when your eyes landed on him. The smile you had, and the dress you wore and the clip in your hair. He counts you. Unable to say anything. Captivated by your beauty.

“Hi, Charlie.” You said in your beautiful voice. 

He stuttered and blushed heavily. You laughed gently before putting your lips on each of his cheeks. He likes a kiss, and no, he likes your kisses. 

A hand falls on his shoulder, and he sees Pierre. Tears in his eyes prevent him from distinguishing himself perfectly, but he recognizes his friend.

“Don’t worry. She’ll come back.” He says softly. Taking him by the shoulders to lift him up and bring him back to the room. 

The others are still there. Confused and shaken, no one speaks. Silence reigns in the room, and no one knows what to say. Charles opens the patio door and leaves the fresh night air in the room. The city slowly began to calm down, and he heard the waves regularly hitting the harbour.

Daniel gets up and gets rid of the table. Putting this party away may make us forget the events that occurred. Heidi and Kelly help him while the others put orders in the room. No one dares to go to see Charles.

The hour passes quickly, and some decide to leave. They quickly greet the last remaining. Pierre observes his friend, who has not moved, and still looks at the sea.

It’s only when Charles' phone starts ringing that he looks away. He calmly enters the room and answers.

“Hello?”

You always liked the fields. You always loved hiding in the big wheat fields surrounding your grandparents' house when you were little. This stretch of yellow was as far as the eye could see. You liked feeling the stems between your fingers, the seeds melting to your touch, and the particular smell of wheat.

You remember a hot summer day. Lying on a tablecloth after a picnic, nature calms by this overwhelming heat, especially the calm of this yellow and green nature. You remember the farmer who held the farm. You spent days watching him working. Helping him through the mould. Watching him turn wheat powder into cereal. You remember this great man, always with a grain of wheat in his mouth that was constantly chewing.

You remember the hum that bees made at work. From wheat to wheat, pollen is harvested. You remember the nests in the hives that you created one summer. Your grandfather, with his jumpsuit, would go every morning and inspect the nests, and you loved watching him do it. You also loved to taste honey with each harvest. Honey is good. It’s sweet. It’s sweet. It’s wild.

You remember Sebastian. His blond hair, his smile, the sound of his kart engine. Many hours passed in his company at the track with his dad. You remember your big brother, following him and Sebastian all day long, like the annoying little sister you were. You remember falling from a tree after the boys thought it was a great idea to climb it. You see your brother jumping down the tree to get to you and hear Sebastian running back to the house to get help. You spent the night at the hospital. You broke your arms that summer, and you had a commotion. Your parents were furious and punished your brother for the rest of the vacation. 

You remember your first winter in the mountains. Mornings skiing, and afternoons making snowmen, eating maple syrup, drinking hot chocolate, just playing in the snow. See your happy brother’s face after he managed to get the last pancake.

You remember Sebastian’s victories. To see him move up from category to category. You remember his encounter with Hanna. You love Hanna. She is so sweet and kind. You remember your great jealousy towards her from the height of your twelve years. She who steals your Sebastian. She who steals your second brother. Oh yes, you were jealous, but she knew how to win your heart, and after all, she stayed.

You remember the Ferrari years. Everyone was in red. You saw the world with red glasses. Red like love. Red like anger. Red as the colour. Red as blood. It’s kind of at this time, when adolescence really starts that you start to change. Physically, mentally, and spiritually, you were no longer the wise little girl your parents admired and your brother despised. No, you grew up making mistakes, a lot of mistakes, until you met him.

Him. The golden boy. The one destined to be great.

You remember his perfume, his smell, his laughter, his mimics, his way of speaking, his way of being and his way of simply being. He intimidated you so much; this guy was destined for something big. Whereas you, we never expected much from you besides being pretty, lovely, not disturbing, quiet, and reserved.

Quiet. 

Reserved. 

Pretty. 

In those words, your brain falls into the dark side of your life. The darkened side of time. Painful and unhappy memories. The memories of him, the one who once was your best friend. He who once was your confidant. He who once saw fit to r*pe you.

To find you after the Grand Prix, in your apartment, in your house, in your home. To be a little too drunk, surely. To hold you firmly. To put his lips on yours. To hold your wrists. To put all his weight on your body. To force you into bed. To beg him to stop. To cry in silence. To feel it in you. To feel dirty. To feel unloved.

To feel alone, so lonely, too lonely. 

To find yourself curled up in a ball in a corner. To wait until morning for him to leave. To want to end your life. To end your nights. To seek help. To be abandoned. To be alone. To be dirty. To be silent. To be reserved. To be pretty.

To be pretty. 

To be pretty. 

To be. 

Silent is all you ask for. 

It’s been a long night. The hours have been staggering. The noises of monitors, nurses, doctors, and ambulances invade their ears. No one speaks, and no one dares speak. It is as if a white veil covers the weighing atmosphere and borrows all those present.

The wait is long, too long. They wait patiently for the outcome of this atrocious night, something that does not happen. Sebastian holds his head in his hands, tears have finished flowing, but his eyes are still red. He feels bad. He feels immense guilt. This mixture of shame, sadness, contempt and anger is eating him increasingly as the hours pass and pass before his eyes. He blames himself for not coming sooner. He blames himself for not holding you back. He blames himself for not seeing. He blames himself.

Full of life and ardour, this little girl was smothered under this icy water. Frozen in time. Only the repetitive sound of drops escaping from the pipe disrupted this freezing scene. She hides all her problems behind her smile. Never in his life has he thought of having this vision of you. This pure horror vision of an act yet so courageous. Because it takes courage to think about yourself before thinking about others. It takes courage to put yourself forward and not others. It takes courage to achieve what others have likely failed to achieve.

The roar of the machines stifled Charles. He closed his ears in the hope of silencing them. To see you with your tubes hanging around you, in you. On this hospital bed, this white bed, this room that feels the end. Eyes wet, Charles looks at your pale, serene face. The doctor’s words are dry and not encouraging. Your parents arrive a few hours later, a flight later. They cry. Your brother has tears in his eyes. Sebastian collapses in a corner. Hanna is there; a veil of sadness covers his eyes. Heidi cries in the arms of Daniel, who looks again in the eyes of Charles. Charles holds your hand, your hand. Your hands are cold, frozen by the consequences. Lando doesn’t dare to come in. He feels guilty because he refused to believe you, to reach out to you, see you, and see your distress. He preferred to become blind rather than awake. It haunts him.

Charles, sitting next to you, is watching people walk by. To say goodbye to you, goodbye, forever. He doesn’t want to. He can’t. You’re still breathing. Your heart is still beating. So why do you have to leave? Why did you choose to go?

“Why?” He mumbles one more time, his head against your ear. “Why are you not fighting?” 

“Cha... we have to go.”

“No... I-I-I can’t. I can’t leave her.” His voice breaks in a sob.

“Charles,” Pierre says, putting a comforting arm on his shoulder. “Let her go.”

“No...” Charles pushes him away, gripping your hand tighter. “She’s going to survive. She’s going to live. She has to live. You have to live.” He prays, kissing your cold skin.

Pierre sight and get out of the room. His family, her family, his friends, and her friends are here waiting for him. The visiting hours are almost over. Everyone wants to go back to their house and sleep a bit. They haven’t slept all night. Charles hasn’t slept all night. Pascale enters the room quietly. Staring at his son. 

“Charles. We need to let her rest. Will come back in the morning, d’accord mon bébé?” She says, taking him in her arm. 

He acquires at her request despite himself. Unable to fight anymore, fatigue slowly eats him away, and he knows that he is of no help if he is exhausted. He leaves the room not without a last kiss, a last look, a last goodbye.

On the following day, Charles came. Staying for hours next to you. Stroking your hair, mumbling your name, praying for you to wake up. He can't take you out of his brain. He can't take you out of him. You're haunting him. We realize how important it is in our life when we lose someone we take for granted. Charles looks at you as a friend until he realizes he loves you. Is it too late? Were you supposed to be?

Sebastian came a few times, only a few minutes. He can't unseen what he saw. He plays and plays the night in his head over and over again. Wondering what he could have done differently.

The doctors are not really optimistic about your recovery. Your body is tired. Your mind is exhausted. They did all they could do. All we have to do is wait. Wait for you to come back. Wait for you to fight for your life. How could you fight if you're not even awake? It's painful.

Strangely enough, he came. The rapist. The abomination of your life. You came late at night when everyone left. He felt bad. "It's too late to feel bad," you think when you feel his hand and you. You wanted to cry, to scream, but nothing. He left shortly after. Looking at you one last time. Looking at what he did to you. You hear from Lando a few days later that he got arrested. Other girls spoke, and there were enough accusations to start a trial. Even more strange, it did nothing to you. Well, how could you feel? When he toked everything you got and smashed it in a million pieces?

Sometimes, you can feel the warmth of the afterlife tingling your skin. You feel it right near you, calling you. Calling you to answer the call. You want to feel this feeling of peace, this quietness. You don't know how to feel. You just want to float. You forgot how to be happy. How to be. Why fight if you may never find yourself again? What were you made for? You wonder to yourself.

Time flies. A couple of weeks passed. You made some improvements for the doctors to feel optimistic for you to wake up eventually. You're stabilized by all those machines. Your parent finally arrived a few days after you were admitted. You can feel your mother's tears on your cold hands and the soft kisses of your father on your forehead. You can smell the sunflower Heidi brought you every time she comes to see you. Sometimes you want to react. To show her you listen. But you can't. Or you don't want?

The feeling of loneliness passed. You can see now how much you're loved. How they love you. You love to hear Arthur talking about your favourite series. You love to hear Sebastian remembering childhood moments whenever he found the courage to come. You love to listen to your mom singing your favourite songs. You love to hear Daniel telling dad jokes, hoping you'll smile in your sleep. You love hearing Lando talking about his latest Quadrant adventures or Twitch lives. You love to listen to Charles saying how much he loves you. How much his life is plain without you. You can't imagine somebody else cared so much about you.

That makes you cry. You can't show them you can hear. You can't show them you love them too. You can't show them how grateful you are or will be. More time passed, and the more you could slowly feel you were losing yourself. All you need to do is happen your eyes, but for some reason, it seems an impossible task to do.

"This is impossible," Alices says in disbelief at the creature rising upon her.

"Only if you believe it is." The hatter whispers, scared of the outcome of all this adventure. But wasn't this all the point of this madness?

"Sometimes, I believe as many as six impossible things before breakfast."

"That is an excellent practice." The hatters says. "However, just now, you might want to focus on the Jabberwocky."

"Six impossible things. Count them, Alice. One, there's a potion that can make you shrink. Two, and a cake that can make you grow. Three, animals can talk. Four, Alice, cats can disappear. Five, there's a place called Wonderland. Six, I can slay the Jabberwocky."

You feel yourself falling into the rabbit hole, and you have been in Wonderland all this time. That's it! You can do it. Six impossible things before breakfast.

"One, you will get a major in architecture."

"Two, you can drive an F1 car."

"Three, you can be happy again."

"Four, Y/n, there's a place for you in this universe."

"Six, I will fight for my life."

At this, though, he feels darkness rising upon you. Everything fades away slowly. You can hear the constant beep of the machines around you. You can feel Charles's hands against yours. You can smell the hospital room you're in. You can see the light shutters again you close your eyes.

Then... you breathe.

Feeling the grass on your feet. The autumn breeze cools down your spine. For the first time, you appreciate being alive. To fill your lungs with air, to hear the water crash against the rocks, to feel the sun warm up your skin, and to taste food again.

You feel a hand around your waist, and Charles brings you closer to him. He sticks you to his bare chest. He holds you firmly for fear that you will disappear again. It makes you smile to see him so loving, so gentle, and so attentive. You turn your gaze from the blue horizon to meet his emerald eyes. He smiles tenderly. His eyes sparkle with a thousand lights when you return his smile. You hold these eyes a few moments before you look wandering towards his lips.

If only it could be true.

If only you could be with him.

______________________________________________________________

Hi! Hope you enjoy this final version of the story. It took me sometimes to get back to writing but I'm getting there. I know some of you really like it and it's fill my heart with joy <3

Tag List : tyna-19 dessxoxsworld ynbutbetter alexander-hamilhoe honethatty12 janeholt3 mloyer karmabyfernando omgsuperstarg laura-naruto-fan1998

#Charles Leclerc #charles leclerc x reader #f1 x reader #f1 #charles #charles leclerc sad #charles leclerc x you

[maximoffcarter]

Your type.

Pairings: Casey Novak x Alex Cabot.

Summary: Alexandra Cabot was known as the top of her class and the good girl of Law School. Casey Novak was known as the famous softball player and the tomboy of Law School. Both meeting each other at a coffee shop, both in different stages of their lives. Would it work?

A/n: I needed to do some kind of college au for our babies. I thought it was cute, so here is my creation of it hahaha. I dunnp if it's any good or not, but I enjoyed writing this, it's been a while since I've done a college au, they used to be my favorites before haha. Hope you guys enjoy this, leave comments, hearts, whatever you like and reblog so this gets some love🫶🏻

*not my gif*

Alexandra Cabot was top of her class. Many selfish and jealous people thought that she was the best just because she was a known person because of her last name. But the truth was that Alex was dedicated to school, she had always been, since she can remember; she spent her free days with books, she loved them. It wasn’t entirely a lie that her family had influenced her in getting into law school, but she was happy with her decision, and she was going to do anything to get to her goals, meaning, she wouldn’t let anything distract her from getting what she wanted. She was probably the only person in her class that didn’t go to parties or gatherings with her classmates, she didn’t go to the games the school held, she just focused on her studies. Did she regret it? Maybe. It wasn’t that she didn’t want to have a social life, she had her friend, but she knew that university was not about parties.

For two whole years it stayed that way, nothing had changed her mind, and she was still very much focused on her studies; that was until her eyes landed on a redhead. One of her classes had gotten canceled, meaning she had 2 hrs free to do whatever she wanted; so she decided to finish homework she had. She had thought about going to the library, but she decided she’d go for a coffee near her building, and she’d spend the two hours there. This was a coffee shop that she normally visited every now and then when she wanted to be at the library, the coffee, and the food in there was really good, and the environment was actually calm, and it helped her concentrate on the things she had to do. But as she sat down in her usual spot and looked around, she noticed a redhead taking an order. She had never seen her here, clearly, because she’d remember that beautiful smile. For a moment she was too stunned by how beautiful she was, she had stared way too longer that she didn’t notice her friend sitting right in front of her.

“Alex?”

Alex snapped out of her thoughts and stared at her friend. “H-Hi! Sorry. I uh…when did you get here?”

Erin chuckled. “I’ve been here for like 3 minutes. How long have you been staring at the redhead?” She grinned as she got her notebook and book out of her bag.

“I- what do you mean?” Alex chuckled nervously. “I was not staring at anyone, just…a bit lost. Thinking what I’m ordering.”

“Uhuh…as if you never order the same, Cabot.” Erin chuckled. “But okay, I’ll believe you. What are you ordering?” She raised her brow.

Alex sighed as she grinned. “Black coffee and a chocolate croissant.”

Erin laughed. “See? Why is it wrong that I caught you staring at the redhead? She’s really pretty.”

Alex shrugged. “I have never seen her here before.”

“She hasn’t been here for long. I saw her the day I came to buy us coffee. I think I heard she’s a law student too.”

Alex raised her brow. “Law student?” She nodded. “I can actually see that.” She said almost in a whisper as she got her things out.

“Alexandra Cabot is getting interested in someone after two years.” Erin smirked.

Alex looked up and shook her head rapidly. “I- Erin no! I just- I was-“

“Hi ladies! My name is Casey, can I offer you anything to drink or eat?” Casey smiled at both of them and then her eyes landed on Alex’s.

Alex cleared her throat as she looked up at Casey, trying to talk but all of a sudden, she forgot how to do that. Erin wanted to laugh but cleared her throat too, getting Casey’s attention. “I’ll get an iced latte with sugar please. And to eat, I’ll just get a muffin.” She then looked at Alex. “Alex? What are you ordering?”

“I- uh…black coffee and a croissant, please.” Alex offered a shy smile.

Casey grinned as she nodded. “Comin’ right up.” She then walked away, but not before she turned to look at Alex again, offering a smile.

Erin laughed and threw her head back. “Oh my, I never thought I’d live to see the day of seeing Alexandra Cabot getting nervous for someone! So.” She looked back at Alex. “Is your type redheads?”

“Jesus, Erin, drop it.” Alex sighed as she covered her face, blushing. “Let’s just-“ she sighed as she looked back at Erin. “Let’s get this done, we have class, and we need to hurry.”

“Avoiding. It is true that you always learn something new from people.” Erin chuckled teasingly as she opened her book.

Alex bit her lip as she looked at Erin for a moment, and then she turned her head to look at Casey. She had come out to Erin just a year ago, admitting that she had always been attracted to girls, but she never said a thing because she didn’t think it was relevant, but when Erin asked if she wanted to go on a double date with some guys, Alex thought it would be good to let Erin know that she was not into guys. She was relieved when Erin accepted her and never judged her, it was the other way around, actually, she was pretty much trying to get a date for Alex in every possible chance, but Alex refused reminding her that she only cared about school and not some dumb romance in university. But now…she had to admit that maybe a little crush on someone wouldn’t hurt. She didn’t actually have a type, she didn’t know if she did. But until now, all she knew, is that Casey could be her type.

********************

Alex sighed as she tried to keep her mind concentrated in the book she had in front of her, she was studying for finals and Erin was supposed to meet her at the coffee shop so they could study together, but at the end plans had changed and now Alex sat at her same spot, trying to focus on her book and hoping to not get distracted with the redhead. She didn’t even know if she worked that day, but the last time she had been going to the coffee shop, Casey was right there, and even if there was someone else taking orders, Casey was always the one that took their order. What Alex had been trying to avoid had happened; she had accepted to herself that she had a crush on Casey. She had been trying to avoid it, she had been trying to not think about her, but it was impossible after learning that she was also a law student, she was in her first year, so it’s not like they’d ever have same classes, but she had caught her in the hallways every now and then.

How did she know about this? Because of course Erin was encouraging her crush. She teased her every possible chance she had. She had also found out that Casey was in the softball team of the university, and it honestly made sense with how beautiful her body was. Alex tried hard to not think about Casey and about the new information that Erin had provided her, but in the last 4 months, it was kind of impossible not to think about Casey. That smile, those eyes, that voice. Alex was now lost, and she knew it. There was no turning back from this, unless of course, she tried to get over it or she found out that Casey had a boyfriend or something, which could break her heart…break her heart was probably too much. But she would feel sad? She was confused to say the least. It was just a stupid crush. That was it. A crush.

“Alex!”

Alex looked up from her book and her heart stopped for a moment as she stared at Casey, who was smiling at her. “Casey…hi.”

“You remember my name!” Casey chuckled softly.

How could I not remember it? “Yes, I do.” Alex chuckled. “You’re not working today?”

“Oh, I worked earlier. But I have finals, so they let me leave early. I actually just finished my shift and was going to stay around to study.” Casey smiled as she looked at Alex’s book. “I take it that you’re also studying.”  

Alex looked down at her book and smiled. “Yes…I uh…I am.” She looked back at Casey. “I’m just reading again, I already studied.” She chuckled nervously.

“Well, I’ve heard that you’re top of your class, so I believe you’re more than ready for any exam.” Casey grinned.

“You’ve…heard about me.” Alex frowned as she smiled.

“A little, yes.” Casey smiled. “I’m sorry I don’t wanna take your time. I- oh! I brought you this.” Casey placed a coffee and a small bag beside it. “Some encouragement to study.” She grinned.

Alex looked at the coffee and the small bag and smiled. “Is that…”

“Black coffee and a chocolate croissant. You always order the same.” Casey smiled. “I’ll see you around?”

Alex nodded. “Hey…do you…maybe want some help with studying? You can sit with me if you want to.”

Casey smiled. “Really?”

Alex nodded again. “Sure.”

“I’d actually appreciate that.” Casey smiled as she placed her backpack on the floor and sat down in front of Alex.

Alex knew that this wouldn’t really help her crush, but at this point, who really cared about it? She was going down, bad, and she knew it. Casey had heard about her, she knew her name, she had even learned her order. And the funny thing was that the very first time she met Casey, she had brought her a plain croissant because Alex had not mentioned she wanted a chocolate one, but suddenly Casey started bringing her the right order, and now she learned it, and even if it seemed nothing, it was everything to Alex. But then her mind started playing tricks on her. Why would someone like Casey want to be with Alex? Even hang out with her? It was surprising enough that Erin was her friend, they were totally different but similar at the same time, but they were able to build a close friendship. But Casey, she was younger by two years, but why would she find any interest in Alex? She was probably just being friendly, maybe she just wanted to know people who were older to have some sort of help in school, but the reality was that Alex didn’t care. The thought of helping Casey and being able to spend time with her made her feel good. This was so wrong, but she didn’t care.

********************

“Where are we going?” Alex asked as she sighed, crossing her arms as she waited for Erin.

Erin smiled as she walked to Alex, closing her closet. “We’re going to a softball game.”

Alex frowned. “We never go to those, Erin.”

“Now we are.” Erin grinned as she handed Alex a shirt with the softball team logo.

Alex stared at it and then realized what Erin was doing. “Erin.” She looked up at her. “No.

“Alex. Yes.” Erin smirked as she threw Alex the shirt. “C’mon, we’re gonna be late.”

“You made me come all the way here so you can embarrass me and take me to a game. Casey’s game.” Alex grabbed the shirt from her shoulder, looking down at it.

“It’s just a game! You get to see Casey play. You’re gonna tell me you don’t wanna see her.” Erin smirked as she turned to grab the rest of her stuff.

Alex sighed as she took off her hoodie and put the shirt on. “You’re gonna pay for this.”

Erin laughed. “You’re gonna tell me you haven’t been spending more time at the coffee shop.” She turned to look at Alex. “Oh, wait. With Casey, actually.”

Alex frowned. “I…haven’t.”

“Oh, yes you have. I saw you two days in a row, sitting with her.”

“I was helping her study!”

“So you introduced yourself?” Erin raised her brows.

Alex cleared her throat as she looked down at her hoodie. “She heard about me and knew my name…” she whispered softly as she looked up at Erin.

Erin smirked. “Oh, someone’s got a crush on you.”

Alex rolled her eyes. “Can’t we just go? Please.”

Erin chuckled. “Fine, let’s go.”

As they got to the field, Erin tried to get them to good stands so they could get a perfect look of the game. Erin went crazy buying food and snacks, but Alex was truly nervous that she’d be seeing Casey playing. In one of their meetings, Casey had talked about her playing softball and the training she had, which meant that she barely had any time to do anything at all, between school, work and practice, her days were pretty busy. So the fact that she had stayed hours with Alex meant everything to her, even if they had been mostly studying the whole time. Alex looked around as she sat down, her eyes suddenly landing on the redhead who was stretching. Her breath hitched as she noticed the tight uniform and how it hugged her body perfectly; she wanted to give herself a slap as she was focusing on her body, which was definitely not right. Her eyes went back to Casey’s face, and to her luck, Casey was already staring at her, a smile on her face as she waved. Alex blushed slightly as she waved back, smiling back at her.

Eventually, the game finally started, everyone around them screaming and clapping for the team. She didn’t even know what was supposed to happen in the game, but she was willing to stay focused for Casey. Erin tried to instruct her what was happening, but even if she tried to listen to Erin, she really didn’t understand a thing. Finally, Casey put on her helmet and grabbed her bat, earning loud screams as she walked to her base. Alex’s eyes lit up as she looked at Casey, smiling as she positioned herself; she had seen some baseball games with her father before, and so far, she knew that Casey’s team was winning, and if she hit a…homerun? Something. They’d win the whole game. Or that’s what her mind made up. She couldn’t help but scream and stand up when Casey started running fast around all the bases, the whole crowd going insane screaming Casey’s name. Erin and Alex jumped and screamed together as Casey’s team surrounded to celebrate the win, everyone cheering for them and throwing food and water. Alex’s eyes focused on Casey for a moment, and her smile slowly faded as she noticed a girl hugging Casey and placing her hand on Casey’s cheek, leaning in to kiss her cheek. Alex cleared her throat and looked at Erin, offering a small smile as her heart sank.

Alex had asked Erin if they could already leave, not wanting to stay there anymore, even if it meant that they’d lose the celebration and the team. Erin had drunk a lot of soda and water, so Alex was waiting for her outside the restrooms, wrapping her hoodie around her waist and crossing her arms as she looked around. A bunch of people kept celebrating and screaming, running around, and jumping. Alex never understood sports, and she couldn’t believe that Erin had convinced her to come just to have her heart hurt at the sight of another girl kissing Casey. She sighed softly, rubbing her face, and groaning softly.

“Alex!”

Alex uncovered her face and her heart stopped for a second as she saw Casey running to her. “Hey.”

Casey smiled widely as she stood in front of Alex. “Hi. I’m so glad I caught you. I wanted to say hi since I saw you at the start of the game.”

Alex cleared her throat. “Oh. Uh. Well hi.” She smiled. “Congratulations, by the way. Good game.”

Casey chuckled as she looked at the ground for a moment. “Thanks.” She looked back at Alex. “I didn’t think Alex Cabot was a sports girl.”

Alex huffed a laugh. “I am not.” She shook her head. “But uh, my friend Erin, she dragged me here. I’m waiting for her so we can go.”

Casey nodded. “Oh, got it.” She smiled. “Hey, uh. So…later we’re throwing a small celebration party, since this was the last game of the season. I was wondering…if you wanted to come.”

Alex stared at Casey for a moment, thinking that maybe she had heard wrong. “Uh…a party?”

“Yes.” Casey smiled. “I mean I don’t normally go to these parties, but you know, we won, thought it could be fun for once. I don’t really have to work tomorrow so. And I was actually going to call you, you saved me a phone call.”

Alex smiled softly. “So…even if I didn’t come…you were going to invite me?”

Casey shrugged. “Why not?” She grinned.

Alex nodded. “I uh…well, I don’t normally go to any parties. I don’t…really get invited but uh-“

“We’re definitely going!” Erin said as she walked out of the restrooms, smiling at Alex and then at Casey. “That’s if I’m invited too? If not, I’ll drop of Alex.” She grinned.

“Of course! I mean, the team is inviting a lot of people so.” Casey chuckled. “So, yes?”

Alex looked back at Erin and then at Casey, smiling as she nodded. “Sure. Where?”

Casey’s smile widened. “Uh…Tina’s house. Back Bay area, there’s going to be a big sign outside the building, so you won’t miss it. I can call you later and tell you the right address.”

“Sounds good.” Alex smiled.

Casey nodded. “Alright, I’ll see you then. Bye Erin.” She smiled before she walked away.

Erin’s mouth opened in surprise as she turned to look at Alex. “Alexandra Cabot going to her very first university party! Oh my! We gotta find you a perfect dress!”

Alex rolled her eyes as she sighed, turning to look at Erin. “Don’t get too excited, Er. I think I saw a girl kissing Casey’s cheek.” She started to walk, trying to hide the excitement she felt.

Erin frowned. “Oh, c’mon, Alex.” She followed her. “That doesn’t mean anything! I kiss you on the cheek too, doesn’t mean we’re dating.”

“I know but…” Alex scoffed. “Why would Casey Novak be interested in someone like me? Like seriously. I’m older than her, I’m…literally a nerd.”

Erin raised her brow. “You do realize that it’s obvious that younger people are fascinated by people of our ages. Plus, it’s two years. And!” She jumped in front of Alex to stop her. “You’re not the only nerd. Casey is top of her class.” She grinned.

Alex frowned. “What?”

“Uhuh. Laura was telling me the other day. We go to the same hair salon, and she was talking about how Casey was the smartass in their class. So her asking you to help her study? Yeah, that was definitely just to spend time with you, Cabot.” Erin smirked.

Alex shook her head as she tried to hide her smile. “Okay…even if she wanted that. I still don’t think she’d be interested in me.” She shrugged. “So…this. The party? It’s just a party and that’s it.”

Erin rolled her eyes. “If you say so. But. We’re still gonna dress you nicely. Comfortable. But nicely. If Novak doesn’t lay eyes on you tonight, we’re getting you someone else. Maybe we can get another redhead.” She smirked.

“Fine.” Alex grinned as she rolled her eyes.

********************

“You’re not gonna leave me alone, are you?” Alex asked as they walked to the house, looking at Erin.

Erin looked back at Alex and smiled. “I believe you’ll leave me at some point. But no, and if you want to go, we can go. Promise I won’t drink much.” She chuckled.

Alex sighed as she nodded. They walked inside the house and Alex was pretty surprised to find a big crowd, the music was a bit loud and there was barely any lights. Erin took her hand so they wouldn’t get lost in the crowd, trying to get to the middle of the house or somewhere where they could actually move and hear each other. They finally got to what seemed to be the living room, people were dancing and drinking, some were playing with the cups, some were making out. So this is what a university party was like, Alex was really not missing anything, this was just a mess and they seemed horny teenagers. In every single part, there were about 2 or 3 couples just making out. She thought that she only saw this in movies but no, it was pretty much real, and she was sure more people were upstairs, and she did not want to figure out what they were doing up there.

As she looked around the room, she saw Casey’s team gathered around in a corner, laughing and with drinks in their hands, and then there was Casey right in the middle. She smiled softly but then her smile fainted again as she saw the girl from earlier right beside Casey, her arm wrapped around her shoulder. Alex knew she had no point in getting jealous, but she was. But then Casey’s eyes landed on her, and Alex swore her smile widened as she saw Alex; she didn’t know if she had imagined it or not, but Casey’s eyes traveled down her body, and she nibbled on her lip as she started walking to Alex; she was thankful that she had let Erin dress her, Alex normally liked wearing nice clothes, but the skirt and the blouse along with the long boots that Erin had picked for her, were showing a little too much, but if that was getting Casey’s attention, then she didn’t mind one bit.

Her breath hitched as Casey got closer to her, her eyes also traveling down Casey’s body; Erin had joked before about Alex being into girls that didn’t exactly dressed girly, she had now seen Casey wearing her softball uniform, she had seen her wearing a skirt with a blazer for a presentation, her work uniform, and casual Casey. Party Casey looked like those girls from movies who were the ones that ruled over people, with a leather jacket, jeans and boots, and Alex couldn’t skip the shirt she was wearing, that showed Casey’s cleavage.

“I thought I’d have to call you to make sure you were coming.” Casey grinned as she stood in front of Alex. “You look nice.” She whispered softly but enough for Alex to hear her.

Alex chuckled nervously as she blushed. “You look nice too.”

Erin cleared her throat as she smiled at both women. “I’ll see myself out for a bit.” She grinned as she walked away, going to Casey’s friends.

Casey chuckled. “Can I offer you a drink?”

“I uh…I actually don’t drink that much.” Alex bit her lip as she looked at Casey.

“Oh, such a good girl, Cabot.” She grinned. “They have nonalcoholic drinks too. We can go to the kitchen to check.” Before Alex could answer, she grabbed her hand and pulled her to the kitchen, walking through the crowd.

Alex tried to stay as calm as possible, and then thought that a drink wouldn’t hurt, it could actually help her calm her nerves. Once they got to the kitchen, she stood close to Casey and smiled. “Actually, a drink wouldn’t hurt.”

Casey turned to look at Alex and smiled. “I can mix some vodka with soda or juice so it’s not too strong.”

“Whatever you drinking.” Alex grinned.

Casey couldn’t help but stare into her eyes, grinning softly. “You look beautiful with or without glasses, you know?”

Alex’s breath hitched again as she stared into green eyes. “Your eyes are beautiful.” She smiled.

Casey bit her lip as she smiled. “Thanks.” She then cleared her throat as she grabbed the drinks she was going to mix and two cups.

Alex looked around trying not to stare too much at Casey, and noticed Erin staring at her, a smirk on her face. She shook her head, a quiet laugh leaving her lips. She returned her stare to Casey once she saw her raising the cup and handing it to her. “Thank you.”

“Of course.” Casey smiled as she grabbed her own drink and took a sip of it. “So, is this really your first party?” She leaned over the counter.

“You said it, I’m a good girl.” Alex smirked as she huffed a chuckle. “I uh…I focus a lot on school. I rather keep myself busy with studying or with books.” She shrugged. “I don’t know…I was just never an extrovert.”

Casey nodded. “I get that. I mean…these parties can get pretty crazy.” She chuckled. “I normally don’t come to these, and if I do, I literally leave early.”

Alex tilted her head. “I thought you were one of those athletic girls that liked to party and be a heartbreaker.” She grinned. “But I heard you’re also sort of a nerd.”

Casey blushed slightly as she looked at Alex. “I uh…I mean…yes, I just.” She huffed a chuckle. “Who told you?”

“Oh, a little bird.” Alex smirked. “So, you asking me for help…?” She raised her brow.

Casey shrugged. “Maybe I just…wanted to have an excuse to talk to you.” She grinned as she tilted her head, green eyes never leaving blue ones.

Alex knew she was probably blushing, but she couldn’t look away from Casey, she could stare at her for as long as she possibly could. “Nice excuse.” She simply said.

They stayed in the kitchen for a little longer than they expected, finding that it was the most quiet place in the whole house, and they just wanted to talk. They were talking about everything but nothing specific at the same time, just making each other smile and laugh. Even if Alex hated the fact that there were a lot of people surrounding them, she loved that she was with Casey, and that she was actually willing to stay with her. But then there was a moment where they literally dragged Casey away from Alex, and Casey made sure to tell her that she’d be back with her as soon as possible. Alex just watched her being dragged away and back into the living room, leaving her a bit sad but also understood that this was a party for them after all. Her eyes finally landed on Erin who was already walking to her, a smirk plastered on her face.

“I see you’re having a good conversation with Novak. Guess we won’t have to find you anyone else.” Erin smirked.

Alex rolled her eyes playfully. “We’re just talking, Er. Nothing more.”

“You’re seriously still in denial that she’s interested in you.” Erin chuckled. “You’re literally perfect, Alex. You’re top of your class, you’re beautiful, you’re nice. Damn, you’re a good girl, anyone would want to have you.”

Alex chuckled as she took a sip of her drink, trying to hide her smile behind her cup. “She did mention that.”

Erin raised her brow. “That you’re a good girl?” Alex nodded. “She does not lose time.” She chuckled softly.

“Well, I think I lost her for tonight. So, whatever was happening between us, is over.”

“Don’t lose hope, Cabot. She could come back any time soon. They’re just doing the typical winning ritual.”

Alex frowned as she looked back at Erin. “Ritual?”

“They take shots, depending on the score they made.”

Alex raised her brows. “Is that even safe?”

Erin shrugged. “Not sure, but don’t be too surprised if your little redhead comes back all drunk.” She chuckled as she took a sip of her drink.

Alex sighed. “I guess.”

“Everybody!” Tina got up on the table in the living room, getting everyone’s attention as they turned the music down. “Those who want to play the bottle, gather around! We got drinks and dares!”

Erin turned to look at Alex. “Let’s go play.”

Alex frowned. “No way. I don’t want to have the bad luck of having to kiss some drunk person.”

“And what if that drunk person turns out to be Casey?” Erin smirked as she grabbed Alex’s hand and pulled her to the living room. “Count us in!”

Alex sat beside Erin and sighed as she looked at the people that gathered around. She was sure that these people were either the ones that were way too drunk, or were somewhere in the middle, and the rest just decided to ignore it or were too into their own things. Her eyes landed on Casey for a moment who was in front of her and laughing with Tina as the people started to play. The first few rounds were stupid things like ‘take off your shirt’ ‘drink two shots’ ‘kiss this person on the cheek’, making Alex realize that these people were a bunch of teenagers and couldn’t believe that most of them -if not all- were law students. She couldn’t help but laugh the moment the bottle landed in Erin, and it so happened that the other side landed on one of Casey’s friends, who dared her to go to a room with her. Alex’s eyes widened as Erin agreed, telling her that they had to loosen up, and then followed the girl. She was too distracted as she saw in surprised how they disappeared, but her attention was brough back when she heard yelling and clapping, her eyes landing in the bottle who was pointing at her, and the other end happened to be on Casey.

“Cabot and Novak!” Alex’s lips parted as she tried to say something, but right away Tina spoke up again. “Since Alex doesn’t know what to say, I dare you two to seven minutes in heaven!” Everyone started cheering on.

“What?” Alex simply said, her eyes landing on Casey who was already standing up, chuckling, and telling Tina something. She shook her head and walked to Alex, extending her hand to help her get up.

“C’mon.” Casey offered a sweet smile.

Alex gulped but grabbed Casey’s hand, standing up and following her upstairs. She could hear everyone yelling and clapping, some of them screaming both Alex and Casey’s names as they went up the stairs. Before she knew it, she was being pulled into a room, and as she looked around, she was sure that this was Tina’s room. She cleared her throat as she turned to look at Casey who was closing and locking the door, leaning her back on it as she looked at Alex, smiling softly.

“Casey…”

“We don’t have to do anything.” Casey smiled.

“Are you- seriously?”

Casey chuckled. “Seriously. I sat down there for Tina, it’s just a stupid game.” She shook her head. “And…I hate having to force people into doing something they don’t want to.”

Alex cleared her throat. “What can you get done in seven min, anyway?” She chuckled.

Casey shrugged as she laughed. “I’ve never been in this situation. But I do know you can do something. Make out maybe.”

Alex stared at her for a moment, biting her lip softly. “And would you?”

Casey frowned. “Would I what?”

“Want to make out with me.” Alex snapped.

Casey wetted her lips, her lip lingering between her teeth as she stared at Alex. “I might be a little drunk but…definitely.” She walked to Alex slowly, stopping just in front of her. “Would you?” She whispered softly.

Alex’s breath hitched as she stared up at Casey. She knew she was tall, and probably the boots that Casey was wearing made her a little taller, and she herself was tall, but she loved the fact that she had to look up at Casey. She bit her lip for a moment as she thought about her answer; she knew she had to think fast, the seven minutes could end any time soon. She nodded softly as grinned, and suddenly Casey’s hands were on her waist, and she leaned down to close the gap between them. Alex’s hand went to Casey’s neck to pull her impossibly closer to her, their lips moving against each other’s just perfectly.

Before her mind could register what was happening, Casey was pulling her to her and turned her around to press Alex against the door, Alex moaning against Casey’s mouth which gave Casey’s tongue access to dive in. Alex’s hand got lost in Casey’s short her, pulling her impossibly closer. Casey’s hands rubbed Alex’s sides, accidentally making Alex’s blouse rise up and she took the chance to make contact with Alex’s skin. They finally broke from the kiss, both panted heavily, but as Alex opened her eyes to look at Casey, Casey’s lips landed on her jawline, throwing her head back against the door as a quiet moan left her lips. Casey trailed kisses down Alex’s jawline to her neck, kissing and nibbling softly, she then looked up again to kiss Alex again, and just as her hand traveled down Alex’s hip, a loud knock on the door made them part away from each other.

“Seven minutes are over guys! Get your clothes on!”

Alex panted heavily as she looked at the door for a moment and then her eyes returned to Casey. She couldn’t help but chuckle at herself as she figured she was now part of those horny teenagers she was judging when she got to the party. Casey ran her hand through her hair as she grinned, looking down at the floor as she tried to hide the redness on her cheeks.

“We should uh-“ Alex cleared her throat as she fixed her blouse. “We should probably…”

Casey nodded. “Yes.” She chuckled as she looked up at Alex. “We should go back.”

Alex nodded, offering a shy smile. As she turned to open the door, she felt Casey’s hand on her wrist, bringing her attention back to Casey. Casey’s hand went to Alex’s neck and pulled her close to her, kissing her lips slowly and tenderly, as if they had all the time in the world. Their lips once again met in a perfect rhythm, making Alex’s stomach turn in a good way. Casey then smiled against her lips, pecking them once more before she pulled away.

“Now we can leave.” Casey grinned.

Alex nodded. “Sure.” She breathed out as she smiled, accepting Casey’s hand in hers.

Alex felt everyone’s eyes on her as they walked down the stairs, but her eyes were only focused on Casey. Casey never let go of her hand, walking back to the kitchen, both quietly deciding that they didn’t want to be involved in the game anymore. Alex tried to find Erin for a moment before she brought her attention back to Casey, smiling softly.

“I’ll get you something to drink.” Casey smiled.

“Can I just get some water, please?” Alex smiled.

Casey nodded. “Sure. I need to sober up a little.” She chuckled as she kissed Alex’s hand before she went to find more cups.

Alex sighed happily as she watched Casey moving around the kitchen. The smile never leaving her smile as she leaned against the countertop, but her moment was interrupted as she felt a hand on her shoulder, making her turn thinking that it was maybe Erin. And then she frowned as she found the girl she had been previously jealous of right in front of her.

“Hi?” Alex offered a small smile.

“You really think you got Casey just because you got seven minutes in a room with her? You’re not Casey’s type. We know who you are, Cabot.”

Alex frowned as she shook her head. “What is that supposed to mean?”

“You’re daddy’s girl. I’m sure you’re in school just because of your last name, and if you think you’re gonna get Casey, you’re very wrong. I might’ve let Casey have her fun tonight, but she’s normally always with me. Casey belongs to me.”

“I can definitely tell. Because she’s been with you the whole party, huh?” Alex raised her brow, giving her a defying stare as she crossed her arms.

The girl laughed as she shook her head. “Just because your friend dressed you up for tonight and you got read of your glasses, doesn’t mean you can take Casey. Didn’t you hear? She was supposed to get your attention, a bet was made.”

Alex frowned. “What?”

“Oh, you really think Casey was interested in you? Please. Look at you and look at her. Gotta say that you left it pretty easy for her to win the bet. So congrats to you too. Maybe if Casey chooses, she’ll give you half of the money, but you don’t need it, do you?” The girl smirked as she walked away.

Alex suddenly felt lightheaded as the words played in her mind over and over; she had to be lying. Casey wouldn’t do that. All this time, all those meetings they had, Casey inviting her here, being so sweet and kind even if she’s not fully sober. Did she really do this for a bet? Was she just being nice to win some money? She had to be joking, this was definitely a lie. But…it also made sense at the same time. The sudden interest in Alex, wanting her help to study even if she didn’t need it, her inviting her to the party, and coincidentally the bottle landing in them while she was distracted. They had planned this. She had fallen in Casey’s game. The thought made her feel sick to her stomach.

“Alex?” Casey placed her hand on Alex’s shoulder to get her attention. “You okay?”

Alex took a deep breath as she looked back at Casey, her eyes getting teary. “How much?”

Casey frowned. “What?”

“How much…was the bet?” Alex snapped, trying to hold back her tears as she stared at Casey.

Casey shook her head as she looked at Alex, confused. “I don’t…what bet?”

Alex scoffed. “I knew it was too good to be truth.” She grinned. “You, suddenly taking interest in someone like me. You also believe I’m nothing more than my name, right? Was it fun, Casey? To drag me into your stupid high school game so you could get some money?”

Casey placed the cups on the counter and looked back at Alex. “Alex, what are you talking about? I don’t think that. I-“

“Save it, Casey. I knew this was way too good to be truth. But don’t worry, the bet ended the moment you took me to the room, right? So whatever this was, ends here. I don’t wanna see you again.” Alex gave her a cold look before she walked away from Casey.

Casey frowned as she tried to follow Alex. “Alex! Wait!”

Just as Alex was walking to the door, she ran into Erin who was just coming down from the stairs, her laugh died the moment she saw the look on Alex’s face. “Alex?”

“Let’s go. P-Please.” Alex cried out.

Erin’s heart sank as she turned and saw Casey trying to get to them. “Let’s go.” She placed her hand on Alex’s back and they both walked out of the house as fast as they could. Leaving behind a confused Casey.

The whole ride back to Alex’s apartment was quiet, Alex staring at the window as she quietly cried, her arms wrapped around herself. Erin kept checking on her but decided to save her words, she knew Alex needed a moment to process whatever had happened back there. There had only been one time that she had seen Alex this way, and she thought she would never see her like this again, so it broke her heart. As they made their way to Alex’s apartment, Alex let out a heavy sigh and opened the door, letting Erin walk in first, followed by Alex. She closed the door behind her and leaned her head against it, her whole body shaking as she cried once again. Erin dropped her bag and walked to Alex, wrapping her in a tight hug as Alex sobbed, turning to vanish in her arms.

“Lex, what happened?” Erin whispered softly.

“I-“ Alex sobbed as she shook her head. “I was an idiot.”

Erin pulled away enough to look at Alex. “Did Casey did something to you?”

Alex looked at Erin at the mention of Casey, feeling her heart breaking even more. “I was a bet.”

Erin frowned. “What?”

“That bitch…the one I saw Casey with…she told me that there was a bet, and that’s why the sudden interest in me. I knew it was too good to be truth, Erin. I just knew it.” Alex cried out, covering her face.

Erin sighed loudly. “Lex, I’m so sorry.”

“It’s not your fault. I let myself fall.” Alex sobbed as she shook her head. “Why did this happen?” She whispered softly.

“I don’t know.” Erin kissed her head softly as she wrapped her in another hug.

********************

Alex walked through the hallway to get to her classroom, feeling like everyone was staring at her and were laughing at her. She was sure that half of the school already knew what had happened back there, and it now made sense why all of them were cheering for them to go upstairs. They were cheering for Casey to win the fucking bet and she was so proud of it. She played it so well that she was so ashamed of herself for not seeing it, focusing on how sweet, kind, and beautiful she was, it never crossed her mind that she could do this to Alex. After all, her assumption of Casey wasn’t entirely wrong. She was indeed a heartbreaker. Her trance was interrupted as she ran into someone, almost losing her balance and making her books fall to the floor.

“I’m sorry!”

Alex knelt to pick them up but the person in front of her got them before her, making her look up to find Casey in front of her. “It’s fine.” She snapped as she stood up, followed by Casey.

Casey handed her the books and nibbled on her lip for a moment. “Alex…”

“Save it.” Alex snapped as she looked at Casey for a moment before she walked away.

Casey sighed loudly as she kept walking. This was truly a nightmare for her. The fact that Alex really had believed everything that Rachel had dared to say hurt her and made her a bit upset, but she understood where Alex was coming from. The moment she laid eyes on Alex, she knew she was completely fucked, not being able to take her eyes away until she realized she was being a creep. For months she just stared at Alex and tried her best to always be the one taking their order. She cursed herself once she realized that she had gotten Alex’s order wrong the first time, so she learned it for her, and was happy whenever Alex showed up at the coffee shop. Taking a chance to talk to her had been a real challenge, thinking that Alex would completely push her away and ignore her, but was happy once she realized Alex might be interested in her too. But now, that was all gone.

Erin walked into the coffee shop and looked around, trying to find Casey who was behind the counter. She walked to her and leaned over the counter. “Can I talk to you?”

Casey looked up from her notebook and nodded. “I’m taking five!” She walked to the back door and walked to Erin, sitting with her at a table in the corner. “Erin-“

“What the fuck were you thinking? Are you seriously in middle school to make a fucking bet with my best friend?” Erin snapped, not giving Casey a chance to speak.

“Let me explain.” Casey sighed. “There was no bet. There never was.”

Erin frowned. “What?”

Casey bit her lip as she tried to hold back tears. “I never had the intention of hurting Alex. Everything I did, I did it because I wanted to. Because I had been looking at Alex for so long and I took my chance.” She shook her head as she looked at Erin. “I was never involved in any bet. Rachel was jealous when she found out I was into Alex. She’s-“ She scoffed. “She was fucking childish. I’m too old to do those fucking bets. I like Alex. I never meant to hurt her, or even take advantage of her.”

Erin sighed as she leaned back in the chair. “Well, shit.” She shook her head. “I knew Rachel was no good.”

Casey scoffed. “She thinks she can get whatever she wants.” She shook her head as she looked down at her hands. “And now Alex hates me.”

“She’s hurt, Casey.” Erin shrugged. “She really believed every word Rachel told her. Alex…she overthinks. She has anxiety. She couldn’t get in her head why you would be interested in her.”

Casey sighed. “But you believe me, right?” She looked back at Erin.

Erin offered a small smile. “I don’t think I’ve ever seen anyone being so consistent with Alex. The way you two look at each other…nothing I had ever seen.” She shrugged. “I love Alex. But I believe you. And you gotta make this right, Casey.”

Casey nodded. “I know. But…she hasn’t been here in two weeks.”

“I can give you her address.” Erin shrugged. “She’ll probably kill me but…I hate seeing Alex so sad.”

Casey smiled. “I’d be forever thankful.”

Erin grinned. “And I thought this shit only happened in movies.” She got a piece of paper out of her bag along with a pen. “Our classes end at 4 pm. She should be home by 5 pm.” She handed it to Casey. “And you know better than to fuck this up, Casey.”

Casey nodded. “I know.”

********************

Alex groaned as she walked to the door. “Erin, I told you I wanted stay in today. I’m tired of you coming at this hour and trying-“ her voice died down as she opened the door and saw that it was not Erin.

“I’m…sorry. I just ended my shift, and I…couldn’t come earlier.” Casey offered a shy smile.

Alex shook her head. “What are you doing here?”

Casey sighed. “You’ve been avoiding me. And I want to talk to you.”

Alex scoffed. “Casey…seriously. We’re old enough to do this and-“

“And then you know I’m old enough to be doing some stupid things as getting involved in a high school bet.” Casey snapped.

Alex stared at her for a moment and sighed softly, stepping aside as she let Casey walk in. “Come on in.” She whispered softly.

“Thanks.” Casey said softly as she walked into the apartment. She turned to look at Alex and smiled a bit as she noticed she had never seen Alex dressing so comfortably.

Alex closed the door and turned to look at Casey, frowning. “What?”

Casey looked down at her hands as she smiled. “You uh…you look really cute.”

Alex tried to hide her smile as she crossed her arms. “Can I offer you a drink?”

“Are we switching roles now?” Casey grinned.

Alex couldn’t help but grin slightly. “Case…”

“I never meant to hurt you, Alex.” Casey said almost in a whisper. “There was never a bet.”

Alex sighed as she looked down at the floor. “Why should I believe you?” She then looked back up at Casey.

“Because I don’t lie.” Casey shook her head. “I know better than to lie. And I never once lied to you. I…” she scoffed. “Everything that Rachel said, it was all a lie. She was jealous. She hated the fact that I was falling for you, and that I was trying to get your attention, and I-“

“You’re falling for me?” Alex frowned.

Casey stared at Alex with wide eyes. “I- Alex. I uh-“ she cleared her throat. “I just-“

“Who’s nervous now?” Alex grinned.

Casey huffed a laugh. She looked at her hands for a moment and nibbled on her lip. “I really didn’t want to hurt you. I didn’t take you to the room because they were going to pay me.” She smiled shyly as she looked back at Alex. “Tina noticed you were distracted, everyone was drunk. I moved the bottle.”

Alex raised her brows, a smirk appeared on her face. “Makes sense.”

Casey laughed softly. “I was scared that you’d reject me. I didn’t want to take advantage of you. I just…really wanted to kiss you.” She smiled.

Alex tilted her head. “So no bet?”

Casey shook her head. “No bet. And yes…I am falling for you, since the first time I saw you, I knew I wanted to do anything in my power to get your attention.”

Alex smiled sadly, looking down again at the floor. “I really believed her.”

Casey walked slowly to Alex, her fingers going under her chin to make Alex look up at her, smiling softly as she fixed Alex’s glasses. “You look beautiful without glasses but…I really like to see you with them.”

Alex blushed slightly as she smiled. “You should be upset that I snapped at you, and that I didn’t believe you.”

“That’s childish. We’re both old enough for those games.” Casey grinned. “I’m sorry, Alex. I really am. But if you give me the chance…I want to make things right. I want to take you on a date.”

“You’re cheesy.” Alex smirked.

“And you like that, don’t you? It’s the type of thing you only see in movies.” Casey chuckled softly as she placed her hands on Alex’s neck.

“Yes. I want you to go on a date with you.” Alex smiled, placing her hands on Casey’s waist, and leaning in to kiss her lips softly.

Casey smiled for a moment against her lips, but brought their lips back together, the same butterflies as the first time showing up in her stomach.

…

“Cabot being the good girl and Novak being the tomboy.” Munch laughed along with Fin.

Alex rolled her eyes. “We stuck with our roles.” She smirked as she looked at Casey.

Casey shrugged. “And we made it work perfectly, even now after all these years.” She smiled as she leaned in and kissed Alex’s cheek, fixing her glasses. “Only took a date to have her wrapped around my finger.”

“Oh, says the one that was the cheesiest of the both of us. Bringing me chocolate croissants with my coffee, flowers almost every week, prepared unexpected dates.” Alex smirked.

“And you loved those. And still do.” Casey leaned in to peck her lips.

“Just get married already.” Elliot teased as he took a sip of his drink.

“This is really out of a movie, you two are too cliché.” Olivia chuckled as she looked at them.

“We wouldn’t want it any other way.” Alex grinned as she chuckled, rolling her eyes at the teasing.

#casey novak x alex cabot #casey novak #alex cabot #alexandra cabot #svu fic #law and order svu #svu #calex #casey novak fic #alex cabot fic

[hiwelcometothemonstersancturary]

so, I read the whole "House Tour (not the house we wanted, but the house we have)", and I loved it so much, and I asked a question after reading it because of the ending, so what was everyone's reaction of toys eating pizza for the first time?

Your First Ever Pizza Night

Synopsis: Angel has to teach the toys how to eat pizza. It's confusing.

---

James' eyes were so wide you thought they would pop out of his head. You nervously smiled at him, feeling the eyes of the toys staring at you from inside the house. "Thank you for your work", you tell him, money in hand. "I, uhm, am sorry for how Catnap tried to scare you away".

"I-it's okay!", he shakes his head. "No big deal, don't worry, Angel".

You eye the group from behind. Catnap tilts his head, still not very trusting of the stranger. You figured that would be the tenth human he talks to in more than a decade. "Take care, okay?"

"You too", he takes the money, counts, and then sighs. You also sigh, giving him a pat in the back. "Man, you really scared everyone out there. I thought you had... You know".

"I've been clean for years. I wouldn't do that", you reassure him. "And now I have those guys to look out for".

Your friend chuckles. "Feeling the weight of parenting on your shoulders already?"

"Urgh, don't even let me start talking about it", you smile. "Okay, I'll head inside now. I don't think half of them know what pizza is".

You tell James your goodbyes, watching him leave. You feel guilty for having him deliver so many pizzas to you, but it is what it is, the kids (your kids) must be hungry. You prepare yourself mentally before entering the house, closing the front door:

"So! Who's hungry?"

Dogday adjusts himself in the sofa as most of the mini toys yell "me!", rushing towards you, including the mini huggy that was using him as an oversized pillow. You laugh as they swarm you, and you pick up Driver and Bunzo on your arms. The little green huggy stims her hands, while Bunzo climbs on your shoulders: "Show us what that pizza thing is! Show us!"

"Bunzo, you're going to fall if you keep like this", Long Legs warns him, stretching all the way from the other corner of the living room to shoosh the crowd away. One catbee blows a raspberry at her, annoyed. "Get away from them! They're going to fall if you guys keep on like this!", the same catbee from before repeats the gesture, but now a candy cat and a bron imitate her gesture. "Angel!"

"You heard her", your warn the little ones. "C'mon, guys".

They coo away, and you watch Catnap proudly looking after the mini critters, most of whom didn't swarm you. He really is their big brother, uh...?

"Okay, guys. Are you ready?"

Driver stims again as you enter the kitchen, piles of pizza boxes distributed in the counters. Delight is counting them, muttering numbers under her breath, and stops when she notices you: "We have 26 boxes for 80 of us! They may last up to a week if we are careful".

"... What?", you chuckle. "Delight, no. The Prototype gave me enough money to feed everyone for years to come, we don't need to ration our food. You can eat as much as you want to".

You grab the first box you find. Bunzo tries to climb your head to take a look, and you laugh. "Eat as much as we want to? I'm going to explode, then!"

You bring the box to the living room, knowing well the kids are waiting for you to take the first slice. You show the box to Dogday, currently incapable of leaving the sofa thanks to his surgery stitches still being fresh. He deserves to see the first slice, you figured.

"You seeing this, pup?"

"With my two eyes!", Dogday nods. Catnap has approached you, and, with a smile, you open the box: "Behold: Pizza!"

"OOOO!", Bunzo yells. Huggy, who was following you around like a shadow, claps his hands, surprised. Kissy is still holding Poppy, who copies Huggy's clapping.

"It's been so long since I saw a real pizza!", the doll smiles. "And it smells even better!"

"This one is pepperoni pizza. There's 8 slices in every box - you guys should all take one. Eat as much as you want to!"

You take a piece, offering it to Bunzo, who grabs from your hand and shoves it on his mouth. You try your best not to accidentally drop him or Driver thanks to your chukling as he tries to deal with the cheese hanging out from his mouth. "Is elishious! Wha is disss?"

"You're going to get food on Angel's hair", Long Legs politely lifts Bunzo up from your head, using her arm to hold him. "And that's called... Cheese".

"Elishious!", he jumps.

"Please try not to choke!", you offer the next slice to Dogday. The big puppy's eyes go wide, and he shakes his head.

"Give it to the others, Angel..."

"There's enough for everyone, dummy, now eat" you take another slice, giving it to Long Legs, who stared at Bunzo in horror as he was still trying to deal with the cheese. "Theeere you go".

The pink spider stares at her slice with a strange look. She eyes Bunzo, then Dogday, who was holding his own as if it were a delicate piece of ceramic, then opens her mouth, then closes it.

"You eat pizza like this, Long Legs", you grab a slice of your own, biting it and using your teeth and fingers to free yourself from the cheese. Still chewing, you add: "Use your hands to deal with the cheese, everyone, you guys don't want to put too much into your mouths or you'll end up choking on your own food!"

You offered the next slice to Kissy, who stared at it with sparkling eyes before taking her first bite. Huggy bites his in one go, and Driver takes the last one before Delight appears, giving you a new box, still of pepperoni.

"Thank you", you give her a nod. "C'mon, take a slice! You too, Driver".

The mini wuggy jumps from your shoulder, and Delight gives a slice to her first before taking one herself. She blinks many time. "Ooh... This is very... Interesting...?"

She gives it another bite.

"Lots of different tastes... And it's so warm and soft!"

You sigh, noticing Dogday had given his slice to a catbee. "Pizzas aren't exactly soft, but I guess they look like it, considering what you guys had to eat..."

You offer a slice to Catnap.

The feline lowers his head. "Savior, please feed the others first...", he asks. "They're hungrier than me".

"You and Dogday have a lot to learn, uh?", you shake your head. "Okay, kiddos, you heard your boss. There!", you put the box in the ground, watching as the critters stare at you, hesitant. "One slice for each, don't fight each other for more, we have a lot of boxes. Speaking of which, can someone grab the other box... Oh!"

Delight chuckles, one box in each hand. She's polite in the way she gives it to everyone, despite all her isolation. Huggy, on the other hand, is less careful thanks to his lack of proper coordination, but he manages to feed all the mini huggies with some help from Kissy.

Dogday only eats after he's sure every single other toy is doing so. By that point, you're sitting on the sofa, Poppy using a plate, knife and fork to each her own slice of pizza. Catnap merely stares.

"Oh... Ooooh!", the orange dog mutters. His tail is wagging. "A-Angel, this is incredible!"

"Nah, it's just pizza. You're going to have fancier food as soon as I get more groceries".

"Fancier food? Are... Are you sure?"

"The doctors are going to kill me if I don't give you all the nutritients", Dogday stares. "Not literally! It's just a joke!"

"Ah", he sighs, forcing himself to laugh. "Even fancier food, uh...?"

"More!", Bunzo yells, jumping up and down. "I ate two slices already, but I crave more! I think I'll explode!"

"Please don't explode", you mutter. "It hurts".

The bunny mischievously laughs, running towards the kitchen. You eye Catnap, who eyes you back with a head tilt.

"Aren't you going to eat?"

"I... Ate yesterday, savior".

You hear a growl coming from his stomach. "Your 'savior' wants you to eat. Go on, you gotta get those calories. No one should starve".

For the first time since the confrontation agains the Prototype, Catnap lowers his ears and fidgets, nervously looking away from you. Around him, the small critters all eat their own slices, some trying to comfort him with a headbonk or by cuddling next to him.

"Catnap", Dogday calls. "You need to set up a good example for... Them", he points to the critters. "They aren't going to eat more if they see you aren't doing so".

"You know well how our rules work, Dogday. They eat first. Me, second".

"And now you are outside PlayCo. and playing by my own rules, kitty", you bite another slice of pizza, before offering the box to Catnap. "Go on, even Dogday and Long Legs are doing so".

"..."

Catnap's stomach once again growls. Using his hand, he takes a single slice out of the remaining three, eating it in one bite. You patiently wait for his reaction.

His eyes become brighter. His tail curls and moves left and right, and his ears go up as well. He stares at you, asking for permission, and you nod. He eats his second one almost immediately, now using both of his hands so he can take more bites and savor the taste more.

You chuckle, grabbing another box next to you and opening it for him and Dogday to share. The two bigger critters have the same sparkle in their eyes, and both go to their next slice almost at the same time.

This... Feels nice. All of this "family" stuff. Seeing them light up and talk about how this ordinary pizza is the best thing in the entire world, how they are eating so much when only at their second slice. It feels nice. They really are acting like normal kids would.

Maybe we can indeed become the parent they need...?

#poppy playtime #poppy worldwide #save everyone au #ask tag #catnap #dogday #mommy long legs #the angel #miss delight #huggy wuggy #kissy missy #ppt poppy #poppy #garca writing

[miyamizuna]

How about sweet Tadashi Yamaguchi? He's current concern is that all cute girls that come over to talk always just want to talk about Tsukki... How about some girl finally changes it?

OMG OMGOMG I LOVE HIS CURRENT CONCERN ITS SO CUTE.

this isnt exactly hcs.. i jus thought this would be such a cute mini fic

wait… YOU MEAN ME?

ft. yamaguchi tadashi w.c: 689 warnings: literally none just fluff also female reader

Yamaguchi Tadashi, many words can be used to describe him; shy, unconfident, and the boy who's always with Tsukishima. It's because of this unconfident nature that caused him to always think that every girl to come up to him does not want to talk to him, but rather Tsukishima. His theory was proved right after girls only wondered where to find Tsukishima. Perhaps he wished it was the other way around; that girls would talk to him instead of Tsuki, maybe even girls talking about himself to Tsuki.

"Um, excuse me!" a voice calls out to Yamaguchi as he stops in his tracks down the hallway. The voice was one of a girl. Taking that into consideration, he used his usual reply;

"Tsukishima is in the library," he stated as he turned around to greet the voice that called out to him.

His eyes meet one of a very pretty girl as he feels his face getting flustered. Yup, this girl is definitely looking for Tsuki he thinks as he continues to look at her.

"huh? Why would I be looking for Tsukishima?" The girl tilts her head in confusion as she looks at him with a questioning look. 

"O-Oh I'm sorry! Is there anything you need?" He replies with a stutter as his. "...Or did you even need anything?" he adds to his previous question out of clear nervousness.

The girl just simply smiled at him, she played with the hem of her skirt with her left hand; her nervousness clear as day.

“Well, I suppose you could say I needed something from you.” she then averts her eyes, from his, as a rose-tinted blush appeared amongst her cheeks. “ I would like to get to know you better.”

Yamaguchi is taken aback by her statement. What girl would want to get to know more about him? Isn’t Tsukishima the interesting one between the two of them? He knew his whole thought process surrounding girls stemmed from his self-confidence issues. Even on the volleyball team. He is the only one of the 1st years who isn’t a starting member. How can someone like him be appealing to a girl?

“Hey! Are you okay..?” The girl says now placing a hand on his cheek to feel his temperature. “Oh no! You’re burning up.” she lets out as her face softens into a worry. 

How long had he spaced out? Did he completely short-circuit? Did he say someone he wasn’t supposed to say?

“I-I’m fine!” he manages to get out after his mini panic. Just then the girl takes her hand off of his cheek and sighs in relief.

“I’m glad that you’re okay! You had me worried for a bit!” she tells him, expressing her worry in her tone of voice. “Oh! I should tell you my name! I’m (l/n) (y/n).” she with her cheeks still rose-tinted, extended her hand out to him as a gesture of a handshake. 

Yamaguchi looks at her hand and then softly smiles and accepts her handshake, relaxing his tense posture for once. “Nice to meet you (l/n), I’m Yamaguchi Tadashi.” 

As the handshake ends, it leaves the two of them steering at eachother for a time. Both seem lost in eachothers eyes. It’s almost as (y/n) can count the freckles on his face, and for yamaguchi, it’s almost like the attention of a girl is foreign to him. 

“(y/n)! Are you coming?” Another girl’s voice called out to (y/n) breaking the silence between the two of them causing (y/n) to jump. 

“O-Oh! Uh! I’m coming!” She replies as she bows to Yamaguchi as a sign of respect. “I-I have to go now. I’ll see you around!” with that, she's off in a flash. 

Yamaguchi wonders if that just happened. He’s not dreaming, is he? Did he truly just talk to a girl who wasn’t looking for Tsuki, rather she wanted to get to know him? He smiles over this mini-victory as he finally gets a cute girl to talk to him. Maybe this was the boost to his self-confidence that was greatly needed.

©miyamizuna 2024

#haikyu x reader #haikyuu #haikyu #haikyuu yamaguchi #yamaguchi tadashi #yamaguchi x reader #tadashi yamaguchi #tadashi yamaguchi x reader #haikyuu x reader #fluff #haikyuu fluff

[chimchiri]

Just read through your headcanons for spit, rd and aj and I would like to hear about yours for rarity!! Especially touching on the point that she's bi/only gay for aj which is quite different from rd's bisexuality. How did she reach that conclusion when all her life she was after stallions/men. What made her see aj in a different way and only aj? Only if you don't mind sharing tho :)

Sorry for the delay in response! I actually had to gather my thoughts.

The formation of this headcanon isn't really set in stone! Honestly there are many different scenarios I could see. I think it could also change depending on where AJ stands in all of this. Does she openly crush on Rarity? Does she have hope? Is she pining? or already over Rarity because she thinks there's no way Rarity could like her as a woman?

I definitely like a bit of angst and pining, so I like the last option a lot. I could see AJ very accidentally nudge Rarity into her enlightenment. E.g. AJ helping Rarity out in her garden, maybe building or setting up some things and (probably without realizing) going into all the sexy tropes of bulky handymanwoman sweating in the sun sun with sweat dripping all over her. I think Rarity would be very much into these masculine tropes that you see in cheap romcoms. Yes, when it comes to romance and daily business she loves a handsome, sweet and fancy man. But when it comes to sexual tension and desire, I could see her lean more into rough, burly men. And AJ checking off a lot of these tropes and desires could easily make Rarity go 'hmmm....' at the end of the day. One thing that definitely immediately turns Rarity on and blush is being lifted off the ground, which AJ could also easily do. And which AJ would do without realizing what she's doing to poor little Rarity. I could see them bicker and pout and AJ just with an annoyed huff and puff pick Rarity up and down two steps to the side so she can finally get to wherever blocked Rarity her path to. And then Rarity is just standing frozen over how easily AJ lifted her up. Gosh that farmer is strong...

Either Rarity slowly realizes that she starts to fantasize over her friend (as in the previous setting) OR she doesn't - which is just as hilarious. I could see that one more in a 'let's drink too much at your yearly family garden festival and makeout and possibly more' way. Rarity being completely oblivious to her attraction towards AJ + AJ still being so goddamn much into Rarity + alcohol + more alcohol + some minutes of alone time makes an incredible night and unforgettable, embarrassing morning. I mean, it doesn't have to be completely sexual. I could see a drunk Rarity just pulling AJ in and making out with her for the end of the night without leading up to anything more. Especially, if AJ had drinks than her friend. I think something like that would work well with Rarity wondering and trying to understand her sexuality for a long time. Probably with more shame pinned to it due to her previously unhinged behaviour.

Honestly, there are many different AUs and scenes I could see with them. Most of them involve Rarity confessing because.. well, AJ is pretty openly a lesbian and she has never seen Rarity seriously flirt with her or any other woman. And even with the possibility of Rarity liking women, AJ probably doesn't think she's Rarity's type - not the way she fawns over handsome and posh gentlemen. Lastly, AJ definitely doesn't want to risk her friendship with her by making a move that may not lead anywhere. So .. yeah. I think Rarity most often has to show interest first. At least in any AU where they're established friends and Rarity starts to realize her liking for her friend.

#excuse any mistakes it's been a long day and I didn't read through it a second time #also: that's just my fave hc #I still think some other Rarity ships are cute #mlp #headcanons #rarijack

[queenofmistresses]

adam x dom!reader where he makes a sexist, misogynistic comment about you so you have to teach him a lesson and decided to make him suck your strap and maybe he cums from it? untouched and truly pathetic

A/n thanks for the request lovely! I hope you enjoyy sorry it took a little while!

Warnings: dubious consent but only lightly - she’s quite forceful but he does agree to it. Slapping, strap sucking (obviously), adam is a dick at the start, let me know if i missed anything!!

“Look it’s just a fact, and I should know as the original dick.” He winks, “Women are naturally submissive. That’s how God made them.” I snort at his incredibly stupid logic.

“Remind me again why your first wife left you?” I sneer at him, watching as he now breaks eye contact and stutters over his words searching for a response. Ever since he came to hell he’s been acting like an entitled brat and I’ve had enough. I’ve made more entitled men than him apologise for their ignorance and Adam is not going to be an exception.

That same day Charlie treats everyone at the hotel to a night out, letting me and angel dust take the lead to take care of everyone since we know the scene a bit better than… well… all of them. Angel enlists Husks’ help in watching over Nifty and I take care of Adam. Which makes my plans a lot easier.

I have a couple shots, letting myself loosen up a little, I watch Adam do the same. I don’t drink much though, and don’t let Adam either, not wanting to be too out of it tonight. For once I let Adam flirt with me, biting my tongue and holding back the roll of my eyes as he spouts nonsense.

I start getting flirtatious back, even a little touchy, and I have to admit to myself that I am enjoying it. After a little while of back and forth I indicate towards the sex room, not waiting for an answer, and pick up my bag before walking into the room. I hear him flail behind me to keep up, almost like a puppy.

He shuts the door and before he has time to make any stupid remarks (which I can see on his even more stupid face that he’s about to) I reach into my bag and pull out my strap on, effectively stopping any movement from him. His mouth is agape for a moment but he seems to try and form some words as his mouth opens and closes periodically. “I would prefer if you’d stay silent.” I say, as calm and cooly as I can. He seems to listen because his mouth clamps shut and he nods. Maybe this would be easier than I thought. “Good.” I say.

I place my bag down, leaving just the strap on in my hands now, investigating it as if I hadn’t seen it many times before. “I’ve made a decision.” I decide to start with, barely grabbing his attention away from the silicone cock in my hand. “You need to be taught a lesson.” His head shoots up to look at me dead in the eyes, though I’m not sure whether he looks more scared or aroused. “Ever since you came here you’ve been acting like a teenage boy and treating me, and everyone else here like shit. I won’t put up with it.” I watch his throat bob and a sick pleasure courses through me. “I’ve taken it upon myself to show you how things work around here, and how things are going to work here,” I indicate towards the two of us, “from now on.”

His face looks completely flushed, and I don’t have to look for long to see how hard he is under his clothes. I scoff and walk towards him, “How does that sound whore?” I whisper cruelly up at him, watching as he nods enthusiastically without hesitation, almost as if he’s lost his own sense of self-control. “Use your words.” I say sternly.

“Please.” He breathes out pathetically, making me smirk as he shudders.

I tell him to strip himself out of all of his clothes, which he does rapidly, as I put the strap on myself. Once he stands completely naked in front of me I look at him properly. I can feel him looking at me too. “Good. Now, you are going to get onto your fucking knees and suck my strap until I decide you’ve done enough.”

I watch as he kneels down in front of me, not allowing him to break eye contact. He shuffles forwards until he’s close to me, and I see him hesitate. “Well? What are you waiting for?” His throat bobs for a moment before he moves his head forward, taking the tip into his mouth. He sucks on it gently and looks up at me, almost like he wants me approval. I roll my eyes, “You’re pathetic. Surely you know how to suck cock properly? Or should I find some other whore who knows how to actually do it?”

That seems to spur him on as his widens his mouth to take more of it, filling his mouth. Now he’s sucking my cock like he means it. Like he’s been waiting for this. Maybe he has. I smirk as he closes his eyes and brings a hand up to rub the base of the cock that he can’t fit it into his mouth. I can see that he’s rutting against the carpet as he does, “God you like this don’t you? I bet you’ve fantasised about being used as a cockwhore every day of your pathetic life.” This only makes him moan as he ruts his hips faster, chasing a release.

He tries to take my cock further down his throat but he ends up choking on it, though that doesn’t stop him. I reach my hand forward and grab by his hair, tight. “Relax your throat.” He does, staring up at me, and I slowly push his head further into my cock, watching it go further. Tears pool out of his eyes and fuck he looks amazing like this.

I reach into my pocket with my other hand and turn the camera on. As I point the camera towards him and press record, I see his hips get faster and rougher as he looks straight at the camera. “You are going to make the best fucktoy Adam sweetie. So fucking easy, just begging to be used by me.” His eyes roll back as he desperately tries to keep sucking on my cock as his hips stutter and I can see that he’s finished.

I keep recording as I slide my cock out of his throat and kneel down to be eye level with him. He’s panting but he still meets my eyes. I bring my hand up to hold his chin gently before I let go to bring my hand to slap his cheek. Hard. “Next time, you fucking ask before you cum. You’re worthless and if you can’t even control yourself then I have no use for you.” I practically growl out at him.

“Y-yes miss.” He stutters out just barely. I stroke his cheek softly and smile at him.

“See isn’t this so much better? I much prefer you like this, and I bet all our friends back at the hotel will too.” He nods at me, his mouth gaped open as I run my hands through his hair. “Good boy.”

#adam x reader #adam smut #hazbin hotel adam #sub!adam x reader #hazbin adam

[ceasarslegion]

god that other reblog is in the same vein as something ive been thinking about lately, and it's that you can't revoke people's marginalized identities just because they're shitty people or you don't like them or they have bad politics or whatever. Like no I don't like Pete Buttigieg either but he's still gay, you can't change that. His military industrial complex simpage does not revoke his gay card or whatever, someone can be gay and have positive experiences that influence their politics in an area that the majority of others in their group don't. I think Ben Carson is an idiot but he's still Black, you can't change that. Being a republican does not change the colour of his skin, someone can have positive experiences in a political party that influences their worldview that the majority of their group has been historically oppressed by. Sorry I guess, but being a marginalized person does not make you better, or immune to bad things, it just makes you that marginalized identity.

There are three things this mentality creates, I think. The first is that you are creating a bar to entry that demands that someone meet an unrelated checklist of requirements to ride. And whose standards are you setting here, exactly? Because it all seems very USAmerican to me. The second is that it kind of thought-stops you from critically engaging in what other people say based on their identity alone. They're gay, they're Black, they're xyz, so they can't possibly hold problematic worldviews or ideologies, REAL marginalized people never do that! The third is that it makes you see individuals as nothing but a homogeneous group that they belong to, rather than the individuals they are, which is not only dehumanizing, but can make you both dangerously elevate said group onto a pedestal of inherent worthiness above all others, or it can make you marginalize the group even further based on the people you personally know from them.

And btw, you can do this to yourself, too. There are too many times I have seen posts that essentially boil down to "im always right about everything because i have this many marginalized identities. If you're going to disagree with me you're anti-xyz, and if you disagree with me while being the same identity as me, you MUST have internalized bigotry." Cool, so, um, the call is coming from inside the house.

#some thoughts

[alieninvasionsarenotajoke]

Everymanhybrid headcanons you have?

Ohmygod you have just opened pandoras box my friend and I thank you so much for it Before Slendy/The EMH channel: So I'd like to think all the boys met in Highschool with Jeff and Vinny meeting first and Evan joining the friend group around sophomore year. Evan gives me the vibes of an extrovert who adopted two introverts and never left them. He was also probably the one who introduced them to their other friends (Nick, Daniel, etc) and the rest is history !

They all like skateboarding, mainly Evan. He's the one who taught the other two how to with Vinny absolutely KILLING it and Jeff.... not so much.

This is less headcanon and more canon since Vinny and Jeff have guitars lying around. But they all play some sort of instruments and have definitely thought about making a band before. Jeff would be on the guitar, Vinny maybe the bass or keyboard, and Evan would go crazy as a drummer.

Speaking of which Vinny and Jeff give me big band kid energy. Mainly Jeff.

I can also see Vinny being a theater kid.

OH! Steph was homeschooled and chronically online (in a millennial way) because of it. This lead her into so many fandoms and she wrote so much cringe fanfiction. Some she wouldn't even let Evan see.

Also Steph is really into 2000s animated MTV shows and kinned Pheobe from Downtown.

One more thing about Steph because I love her and I'm 100% not projecting onto her ;D She loves mindless self indulgence, she wants revenge, and modest mouse. I feel like Vinny and her bonded over music, especially Modest Mouse.

After slendy/emh channel: Vinny is a very big Modest Mouse fan, like listened to all the albums and probably knows the bandmembers names and lore. His favorite album is "The Moon and Antarctica" which became a comfort album during his time living with Habit. He listened to "Alone down there" over and over because it reminded him of his friendship with Evan.

Sidenote if you haven't listened to "The moon and antarctica" you really should cause most of the songs give me EMH vibes. Especially Alone Down There and Tiny Cities made of Ashes. I honestly want to make a analysis on that album and how it fits with EMH, but that's for another time. :D Back to headcanons. Habit loves frustrating boardgames like monopoly or uno. Mostly because he feeds off the emotions. When Vinny lived with Habit, he would always bug him about playing Monopoly specifically. Vinny gave in one time and played for a bit until he realized Habit was somehow cheating.

Habit also ate the pieces in front of Vinny as a power move.

He also likes how metal tastes.

Habit might have pica.

That's all for now because if I go on any longer I'd start writing a whole ass book. If you'd like more headcanons I'd be glad to post some cause I have plenty !! Sorry if anything here is confusing I'm bad at putting thoughts into words sometimes XD

if you've read this far, here have an Evan:

#emh #everymanhybrid #slenderverse #habit emh #habit everymanhybrid #mankind's bad habit #evan everymanhybrid #vinny everyman #everymanhybrid vinny #vinny everymanhybrid #vinny emh #evan emh #jeff emh #jeff koval #evan myers #vinnie everyman #steph emh #steph everymanhybrid #emh headcanons #everymanhybrid headcanon #headcanon #jeff everymanhybrid

[companyissuedbicpen]

Am I missing something with the Watcher drama? I sort of feel like people are acting like what they did was completely irredeemable and I don't really understand why?

I understand why they got backlash, but they responded and are changing how they do things, so do people really just feel betrayed enough by the way they announced it that they don't want to watch anymore?

Like their decision kind of makes sense to me, they need more money to keep making their content and YouTube money is not what it used to be yk? It was a bad way to announce it, and a bad decision to pay wall EVERYTHING but they apologized and are doing things differently so I guess I just don't get why they're still getting backlash.

/gen

(Sorry to drop this all in your inbox you just seem well-informed on the situation xo)

Hi anon! Very good question about a complex situation, so I’ll do my best to get down my thoughts in a comprehensive way.

(Remember to take my opinion with a grain of salt! Everyone has their own takeaways and I’m not attempting to change anyone’s opinions, these are just my own thoughts.)

As far as I know the situation hasn’t changed, and the continued backlash has more to do with how people individually feel about to the situation. From what I’ve seen there are three main perspectives:

1) “I think that the apology and changes make up for their actions, and I will continue to support them.”

2) “I think that the apology and changes are a good first step, but it will take a while for them to regain my trust.” (This seems to be the majority.)

3) “I think that the apology and changes do not make up for their actions, and I will no longer support them.”

None of these perspectives are right or wrong, it entirely depends on your own personal values.

That being said, most algorithms tend to amplify more critical/cynical perspectives because that’s what gets the most attention, which can make a small amount of the fanbase seem much larger than it is (not to discount those opinions, to each their own). The more negative-leaning, the more attention things usually get. Not just in fandom discourse either! Think about news headlines, and how much positive vs. negative news you usually see.

So even though the majority of the takeaways (at least that I have seen) have been relatively positive, scarcer statements like “Watcher is now an evil billion-dollar corporate scheme that is preying on its audience!!” are going to generate more controversy (and therefore more attention) than something like “This was a good first step, I hope they continue to improve in the future.” The message with more attention can lead people to see that as the majority opinion, and spread that message further, etc. etc.

This is what can cause it to look like everyone thinks that Watcher acted maliciously and is only interested in money to line their own pockets. I’m not saying that there still isn’t work to do and that the situation is completely fixed (I personally lost a lot of trust in them), but I don’t think it’s as drastic as it might seem to many people at first glance.

Hope this answers your question! Thanks for the ask, this was really interesting to think about!

#watcher #watcher streaming #watcher entertainment #ryan bergara #shane madej #steven lim