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sahpathi2016-blog · 6 years

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Tamar Diary (1) by Monalisa Debnath

My new friends in Tamar, you welcomed me with warm hugs, awaiting for my presence with affectionate smile and curious souls and I forgot to keep the doors open.

And how beautifully you made me fall for the brown entrance where you were resting your face. How beautifully you have taught me to keep that door (that I have never opened since last summer) open for the rest of my life.

Have you ever visited Tamar? Yes,J It’s close to your constructed imagination that your drawing teacher used to show you as a beginner. A village, with a belt of green hills, uneven roads and people. As I entered into the school I felt the year long wait. Kids were in search of the one year old memories, the memories that trying to rejuvenate. Old faces, habit and stories were having a quick recap. One year old ‘history’ splashed over us like fresh rain drops… and went on a journey to make a new one with new faces, new ideas, new experience.

The experience was totally different from last summer . The children remembered the lines of the songs, the games, the fashion sense of the didis who came the previous year and also their daily habits,conversations with them. At the very first day it seems quite difficult for not to compare but to accept and making a distinct place in our mind (equally for the children and me). Everyone was eager to see the old faces with that same warmth. So we started sharing memories that had begun on the stairs we were sitting for the weekly programme. Love is meant to be shared.That’s what we did. We started to talk… talk about rahee didi, sushmita didi, madhu didi, asmi didi and also about my kids in kundi and my dear team mates of last summer.And all of a sudden I came to know the kids of class xi went to summer camp organized in Jharkhand. And some of them knew some of the kids in Kundi School . :D We felt some kind of association by sharing our experiences about the common persons in our life. It took a while to be their Mona didi from “didi aapRahee didi jaise ho.”

I used to take class ii,iii , xi. One thing I felt problaematic. Everyone is so sincere about their study but seemed weak in basics. When Raginee , a team mate (who used to take English in class xi)told them to look for words starting with A, the response was spellbound. They came up with word like ‘Abuse’ , ‘Abortion’ and so on. And thus it help us to continue the discussion on Sexual abuse, rape, consent . We later talked on Safe sex and marital rape with older section. And we talked about Good touch and Bad touch;idea of beauty perceived through the advertisements (combined - class xi and x – divided in five groups depicted their favourite advertisement as a part of the session); femininity and masculinity(and how they are socially constructed) with both the younger and older sections. We also took a session on identity.

And I hereby want to tell you about the class on identity. It was the incident of just another day. Raginee, Vanshika and me were returning from our consecutive classes. As we walked on by, Girls, peeping at the door invited us to visit their class someday. As Nikita and Vanshika used to take class vii, the other two didis seemed still unfamiliar to them. And we(volunteers) started introducing ourselves in our own language and asked them to introduced themselves in their own language. We then found that many of them are ashamed to speak in their own language, i.e; Santhali, Panchpargania, Mundari. Majority of them had no knowledge about Birsa Munda. Some of them it was name of a park, one of them said it’s a name of a station. No one did actually tell who Birsa Munda is. They are ashamed to recognize their parents as farmers whereas 65% of the population in India still engaged in agriculture for their means of life. One of them addressed her brother ‘jobless’ as he is a small scale farmer. Now my question is to everyone is this how you imagined India after 71 years of its independence. Where the half of the population’s dignity is on stake? And you are in the middle of a debate on military insurgency? The kids have become the lab rat. I was ashamed, angry, disturbed to see a systematically organized consequence of education. They are getting to watch daily soaps like ‘Naagin’. Why the prime TV do not telecast something good , something that has some reality, rationality and more precisely ideas and not biased to a particular caste and class? They are being sanskritized in a way where they feel like Hindi (Debnagri) is the language that is uniformally recognized and socially accepted. They have started frowning and bowing their head in terms of their identity and have started believing what the people in power portrayed them. They have started trying to understand themselves from the gaze of the Brahmins.

The class went for really long and students were happy. People are singing in Mundari, Santhali, Bhojpuri, Asamees, Bangla. Some of the teachers greeted us saying that we were doing well. The conversation continued for few minutes. He ended with “These kids used to know anything… when they came here they could not speak in Hindi and did not know how to interact.. we make them what they are, hum in bachhoko insaan banaye. ”

But there is always another side of a coin.

4.7.17

It was the day of celebration- celebrating ourselves. Celebrating the homecoming of Rahee didi. Celebrating the essence of free spirit. All that started with theatre workshop.. reciting poems have` seemed to get new vessels. It started with heavy rain and somehow come to an end when it was raining cats and dogs. Though we (volunteers) insisted to continue it after the rain got stopped. The performers of the Nukkad Natak, named after Ulgulan( Revolution) were full on energy and wanted to perform it at that moment. We got that amazing audience watching everything with abrupt attention. But due to the time schedule and the rain all the teachers were not there. So the kids were prepared themselves to perform it again on the next day. As the performance ended with Where the mind is without fear.. the kids from younger section came to me and expressed their urge to sing a song. It began with Jodi tor daak shune keu naa aase, then that Mundari song they taught me and finally the song that they wanted to sing from the bottom of their heart disregarding the ‘social’ relevance.

Paagla Khabi ki

Janjhe more jaabi

Paagla khabi ki!

Shuru theke Shesh porjonto lode jaabi..

Paagla ki khabi! <3 :D

And the oldest teacher shouting from her place fisting the air… “Hum Bharat ke naree hein, phool nahi chingari hein.!”

There is more to say. There is more to discuss on.There is more to get amazed. But for now daamakha( good night). :)

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novaeagle · 4 years

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Casimir and Asahi

A short little story about Casimir talking to Asahi about his bonding with @meepsthemiqo

Asahi was noticeably nervous, his eyes darting every which way, and his body tense, a direct contrast to the calm and peaceful Lalafell accompanying him. Meeps had gone off to the markets, and Casimir decided to pay Asahi a visit while she was off. Even though Casimir was a Lalafell, the famed “White Demon”, as he was known in Garlemald, still gave off an aura of incredible power.

“Relax, little one, I do not want a stray butterfly to give you a heart attack.” Casimirs voice was playful, teasing, and surprisingly deep for a body so tiny. Asahi shot a nervous glare at the man but tried to do as he was told.

“Why would you bring me to the middle of nowhere then, White Demon?” Casimir chuckled as Asahi used one of his battlefield nicknames and looked around the swamp. Outer La Nocsea was indeed out of the way, but Casimir enjoyed the relative tranquility of the Hermits Hovel, and it was one spot that he knew no one would bother them.

“If I wanted to kill you little one, I would have done it already. I just wish to talk.” Asahi grimaced at Casimirs reply, and snapped,

“I already know what you’re going to say, you’re going to threaten me if I hurt Meeps.” Casimir pursed his lips, humming thoughtfully before nodding,

“No, I’m sure I’m near the bottom of a very long list of her friends and family that have said such things, so I will refrain from doing so. I wish to speak more about our relationship with each other.” Casimir turned towards Asahi, meeting his eyes, “You are aware Meeps is now one of my adopted daughters? If you two marry, or bond, you’d become my son-in-law, and even though we have had a rough past, if Meeps believes you have changed... I want to believe her.” Asahi glanced away, not able to meet Casimirs piercing eyes. He frowned, crossing his arms and closing his eyes, collecting his thoughts for a moment before taking a deep breath,

“I have... I-… I really do love her.” Casimir nodded, turning and walking to sit on the dock near the hovel, tapping the spot next to him for Asahi to sit. When he does, Casimir waited a few moments before talking,

“I want to believe that. But I have already stated I do not, and I cannot give you my trust yet. What you did, to not only your sister but the people of Doma, I cannot forget. There is nothing you can do or say to me at this moment that will convince me of your sincerity because I know what your false promises look like.” Asahi turns away, gripping the dock as his face contorts into a frown, “I say this because I want you to understand why I am speaking and acting the way that I am, Asahi.” He snapped his head up, flinching when his gaze met Casimirs.

“S-so there’s no way you’ll ever trust me.”

“I did not say that I said there is nothing you can do or say at this moment.” Casimir waits, tilting his head a little at the boy, prompting Asahi to think about what Casimir had said.

“You... You can’t trust me now.” Casimir nods slowly, prompting Asahi to continue, “but... perhaps in the future... when I’ve proven that I am sincere.”

“I am not someone who trusts too quickly...” Casimir replies after a moment, starting to sway back and forth a little as he thinks, “I cannot go off of word alone, even if I wholly trust the person who speaks for you. Loyalty is not earned in a day; it is tested and proven multiple times in a person's lifetime. You shall have my trust Asahi... when you earn it.” The pure sincerity of Casimirs words floored Asahi, it was true, he was a sneak and had used treachery and deceit to gain what he wanted before, but with Meeps, and now Casimir, there was a sincerity to them that made Asahi long for that feeling, of being able to say something and have people believe him no matter what. He knew it would indeed take time though, just as Casimir said, and he must prove himself trustworthy before anyone could effectively trust him.

“I-... I shall try-”

“No.” Asahi looks at Casimir in shock, who shakes his head, “Don’t try. Do. Prove me wrong, Asahi. Prove me a liar when I said you’d betray Meeps.” The man turns to meet Asahi’s gaze, who doesn’t know whether to feel outraged, shocked, or a mixture of both.

“Fine.” He glowers at Casimir, “I shall prove you wrong. You’ll see!” To his surprise, Casimir grins, then laughs.

“Good! That’s the spirit I want to see from you. You’re going to have a tough time with Meeps, especially because of who you are. People aren’t going to trust you, but you need to stare them in the eyes and have the willpower and the courage to prove their distrust wrong.” Casimir stands up and gets in Asahi’s face, “You need to light a fire within yourself,” Casimir pokes Asahi in the chest for emphasis, “light a fire of rebellion in yourself, just as I did in Doma and in Ala Mhigo. You’re living under the tyranny of people's mistrust, and you must rise to fight back against it. Have faith in yourself and your love for Meeps, and you’ll find soon that people will begin to trust you and your word.” Casimirs eyes were lit up with a fire, and it scared and excited Asahi at the same time. This was the man who had fought against gods and won, and Asahi was seeing why, not because he was physically strong, but because he was MENTALLY strong. His will was steadfast and iron-like in its resolve, and Asahi needed to be like that. He stood up, his eyes staring back at Casimir,

“I will! I’ll prove you wrong, and I’ll prove the world wrong. I love Meeps, and I won’t let anyone's doubt shake my resolve! I swear!” Casimir’s smile was grim, but his eyes held something that Asahi couldn’t quite make out. Casimirs reply stunned Asahi,

“I believe you.” Asahi gulped, shocked, before turning away, hiding the color rising to his cheeks as Casimir bursts into laughter behind him. Asahi felt a tap on his shoulder as Casimir leapt up to give him a reassuring pat, then gestured for the boy to follow him. “Come, little one, I’m sure Meeps is back by now, and will be missing you. Besides, you have a wedding to plan, no?” Asahi could only stand and watch Casimir in shock, before shaking himself,

“Y-yes sir!” and ran to follow the man back, back to Meeps, and back to his home.

#Asahi #meeps x asahi #casimir #Casimir Moreau #asamee #meepsthemiqo #story #ffxiv fanfiction #ffxiv rp #ffxiv oc

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