Is asexual spectrum awareness week and I was a little sad that I wasn’t going anywhere or doing anything so now I’m planning an doing one ace related thing for each day of the week.
Today I making some incredibly garlicky bread with roasted garlic, and yesterday I hand wrote a fanfic in going to finish typing up. Its going to be fun
HAPPY ACE WEEK PEOPLE
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if I see one more “straight people on the aromantic and/or asexual spectrum don’t count” I will personally light shit on fire
If you’re heterosexual and aromantic, you’re valid. If you’re asexual and heteroromantic, fuck yeah, you’re valid too. You belong here, in LGBTQIA+ spaces, and I love and accept you here. You belong at the pride parade, you belong in the LGBTQIA+ clubs at your school or university, and you belong in the LGBTQIA+ community.
We love you. You belong. anyone who says otherwise can go fuck themselves.
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not directly related to trans people but
asexual ≠ sex repulsed
hypersexual people can also be asexual
asexuality, along with aromanticism, is a spectrum
stop disrespecting microlabels
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🖤💜Happy Asexual Spectrum Awareness Week!!!!💜🖤
Some of you know that I celebrate this week every year but for anyone knew here, for the entire last week of October I celebrate ace week by posting all about asexuality and its spectrum. There will be information posts and pride posts and it's all good fun.
I know this so does not fit the theme of this blog but ace week is really important to me. When I first found asexuality this week was instrumental to me accepting it fully. Then I started this blog and discovered that there are so many of us on the ace spectrum here. It just felt right to celebrate this week here!
I have an entire tag for all things asexuality that you can find here. In it is previous ace week posts and the asks I've answered. Give it a look!
This week I shall be periodically posting/reblogging aspec related posts so come and celebrate with me!
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If someone calls ASAW "aroace week" one more time...
Aros and Aces are two separate communities. Yes, there is overlap. Yes, aroaces are of course welcome in both. Yes, not every aroace separates them. However, the two weeks are separate for a reason. Let aros and aces have separate communnities sometimes; not every ace is aro and not every aro is ace
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in honor of aromantic spectrum awareness week, i thought i'd take the time to talk about how much my personal life and feelings improved after coming to terms with the fact that i'm aromantic. before i accepted this, i found myself in several romantic relationships where i was deeply unhappy, uncomfortable, and made to feel like i wasn't a good enough partner because i just couldn't do or feel certain things.
i've never enjoyed kissing, and cuddling gets uncomfortable for me within the first few minutes of doing so. even hugs are deeply uncomfortable to me unless i really know and care about someone, and even then, hugs only come when that person asks for them. it never occurs to me to touch people this way, the most you'll get out of me is a pat on the shoulder, back or knee.
i ended up dating several people who were very much romantics, and heavily focused on that aspect of our relationship. it kind of felt like torture to me, i felt like i was being forced to live every day like it was Valentine's Day- every day had to be filled with hours of cuddling, kissing, and telling the other person how much i loved them. while not all romantic partners are like this, it wore on my psyche quickly to be paired with folks like this, because i understood how important it was to them, but i just couldn't keep up the performance.
i thought something was "wrong" with me for years and that i just wasn't in touch with my emotions, or that i was somehow embracing some toxic aspects of my masculinity without realizing. it took me ages to remember that i came out as aromantic when i was much younger, but after criticism from my friends, including a friend who was asexual, i stopped identifying with the label, because i was told that aromanticism wasn't real, and that that just made me an asshole.
nearly a decade and several uncomfortable romantic relationships later, it finally clicked that there wasn't something wrong with me, but there was something wrong with the situations i was getting myself into. sure, i love being partnered- i have a queerplatonic partner that i've known for a decade and have only gotten closer to over time. but we've never been romantic. we don't exchange romantic platitudes, and i realized; i've never been happier with someone else than i am with this person.
why is that?
oh. because they don't expect romance from me. they are also on the aspectrum and don't have a romantic partner, either.
this relationship has brought me more joy than any romantic partnership i've ever attempted to pursue. that doesn't mean there's something wrong with me- i was just looking for happiness in the wrong places. i was miserable not because i'm aromantic, but because i was getting into romantic relationships.
romance can be a source of misery. romance does not inherently make everyone happy. we are not all looking for romance as a species. in fact, chasing it makes many people miserable. too many people spend their lives looking for "the one" that they can kiss, cuddle, hold and say all of those mushy things to when they may not even want that to begin with.
i've never been more at peace with myself since finally, fully accepting that i'm aromantic. i love who i am, and i love how i love. i am not loveless, i experience platonic, queerplatonic and other forms of love. but loveless aromantics aren't miserable, either. we are all embracing ourselves in a way that's true to us. we are refusing to warp ourselves to a society that tells us that we all must have homogeneous feelings.
i am aromantic. i am here. my aromanticism is queer in a society that expects and demands romance of me, and this is true of all aromantics, cis, trans, gay, straight, bisexual, asexual, and otherwise. we are here, we are not going away any time soon, and we will not be silent because our identities make some people uncomfortable. we are happiest being who we are.
happy aro week, this goes out to every last arospectrum person out there, appreciate yourselves this week. you deserve it.
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