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babyfoxcollectionthings · 5 months

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#asianpeople #culture #ethnic #ethnology #people of the world

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brasil-e-com-s · 2 years

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#fish #fishes #aquarius #aquarium #goldfish #natureza #asianpeople

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kanikasethi · 2 years

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Quick Sketches. Some quick sketches I did of people I encountered during my travels. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . #goatravels #fishseller #seabeach #betalbatim #dailydrawing #artjournaling #artjournal #urbansketchers #sketch_daily #drawingdaily #illustratorsoninstagram #pendrawings #pendraw #asianpeople #womenofillustration #sketchaday #instarat #globalsketchers #skecthbookart #adrawingaday #illustratedjournaling #traveljournal #doodlingaway #womenwhodraw #postcardart #journalingpeople #sketchingpeople #kanika___sethi (at Goa) https://www.instagram.com/p/Ch4cUbSvFIA/?igshid=NGJjMDIxMWI=

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inklingshadows · 3 years

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Do Asian Parents Actually Care About Their Children?

The negative stereotypes about Asian lifestyle - or more specifically, Asian parenting - never failed to amaze me. I have lived in the West, interacted with so many people abroad and while not everyone are racist and xenophobic towards Asians, most of them had all sorts of myths made up in mind about Asian lives. I spent so many countless exhausting hours explaining to them how these stereotypes are so deceptive (which, by the way, is literally true about every single culture) and even then their brains would not concede. Which brings the question: how rooted are these beliefs in non-Asian (and even Asian) people? It literally prompted me to write this post where I want to break the stereotypical beliefs and explain them:

Asian parents care more about family reputation than their children.

True that Asian culture is family orientated. True that we prioritize our family duties more than we do independence and individualism. But you need to understand that this goes both ways. Most children also feel the same way the parents do. You also need to understand being family orientated does not mean we as children are submissively obedient to our elders’ desires. Being family oriented means growing up in a household always full of cousins as playmates, aunts and uncles bringing over food, celebrating meals for no reason apart from the fact everyone is together, gossiping about family drama here and there. Having a cousin come over rather than a friend to help you with your breakup dramas, your parents and other close relatives the first people to call for a place to stay or loans/gifts for money if you fell into crisis, rather than hotels and banks. Being family orientated means finding pleasure in making your family members happy rather than your childhood superhero ambitions. I chose to study architecture because my grandpa dreamed that I would be designing houses and bridges in the poor villages one day. I came back from abroad even though I had a cool and high pay because my father was dead and my mother would be all alone in the country. I study and get good grades simply because I wanna make my parents proud. As Asian children, we do these not because our parents force us to, but because we actually feel like this. And we do feel amazing when parents go around gushing on to their friends about how proud they are of us, see her? See the girl with the engineer of the year award? That’s my daughter! My son came back to the country just for me, because I wished he would be near and helping the country grow.

So the individualistic and independent Westerners look at the Asian kids doing what their parents want, and they immediately assume that the parents have oppressed us into leading this life. The truth is, we do it because we want to. And in case the kids don’t, in case they don’t study what their parents had dreamed them of doing so….ah well. Parents may be disappointed but they would rarely oppress their children into choosing their majors. They may seriously interfere and try to convince their children if they were choosing a major that did not have a high-paying job and chance at success and leading a comfortable life, such as music. Even then, this is because they care very hard about their children. Not because of honour at all.

Asian parents are never satisfied with the achievements of their children.

This is very untrue. On the contrary, they are more satisfied with your achievements. It’s just that they rarely tell you that to your face. They would give you flat tones of “Good job” and then criticise and tell you how you can do better. It’s because they believe that you can still thrive harder and do better. They never want you to stop trying. So while you keep working more on bettering your math scores or your literature subject, your parents go gush about how good you are at this and that to their relatives and friends.

But they do appreciate you and tell you they are proud of your achievements. It’s just they make those moments count. When you feel low and need to boost your confidence, they will tell you how much faith they have in you. The fact that these moments are so rare makes them more special.

Asian parents are very controlling and oppressive.

By Western standards, it does seem that Asian parents are very controlling about their children’s influences and movements. But you also need to understand that life in the West is usually very secure, less poor and you can rely on the government to protect your human rights and laws. For most of the Asian territory, this is, or was not for a long time, true. Staying in community is the way to survive here. Asian parents know this face and they want to shield their children from the harshness of life they have faced. This is why they appear very protective and controlling. But children are not oppressed. Given a certain age, definitely children have a say in their lives and they are allowed much freedom as they grow older.

Asian culture is just as flawed as any culture. It’s got its great points, as well as severe drawbacks. They can be too overprotective to the point they shelter their children and make them unprepared for real life. They can be stoic and rigid so they don’t have intimacy with children. But they also raise their children amidst a lot of laughter and family reunions. They teach their kids to be sensible and practical about life. Yes, there are extreme parents who oppress their children and only care about family reputation and force them into marriages with business partners and make them choose careers they are not enthusiastic about. But it’s not like abusive parents don’t exist in the West either. It’s not easy to understand a culture that you are not part of. We need to put ourselves in the shoes of the people and view the world as they do, to understand their actions. Learn not to judge a book by its cover. If you cannot afford to read it, try not to judge it at all.

- From the shadows.