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somegrumpynerd · 27 days

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Seeing how the Killer kitty in @ask-the-cat-cafe reacted to Nightmare I just imagine he doesn't get peace anywhere lol

#UTDR #UTMV #ask-the-cat-cafe #Nightmare Sans #Killer Sans #Everywhere he goes there is a Killer who wants his attention lol #I love this blog so much it's bringing me so much joy #I cannot wait to see who the new kitty is!!

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ask-the-cat-cafe · 1 month

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The Cat Cafe!

Decided to do a thing and make my cat designs into a little ask blog! So if you see this then go ahead and ask the cats or Ccino all and any questions!

Ccino and his au belongs to @black-nyanko ! Love this au!!

[Next]

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badlydrawnbabydirk · 1 month

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// so I crafted my own Sburb Beta Soda and im not a gatekeeper so:

1 bottle of Mountain Dew

1 bottle of Minute maid Lemonade

1 packet of Jolly Rancher Green Apple drink dust

1 pack of Gushers

a few cups

(I found all of this at Dollar General and it was only 9 usd. And I got an entire box of gushers, not just a single pack. Zamn)

Step one: pour lemonade into 1-2 cups. I used a pretty tall one and there was too much lemonade in the bottle, ended up being split maybe 3/4 to 1/4 ish in the two cups.

Step two: pour the packet of green apple flavoring into the cup with more lemonade. Stir that shit !!!

Step three: Pour the Mountain Dew into a big glass — you won’t use all of it ! Fill it a little under halfway !

Step four: Pour the green apple lemonade on top!

Step five: add the gushers !!

That’s all!! I haven’t tested stirring it, it was fine as is. Pretty strong but it’s literally great.

idk if anyone else has tried this (probably) but this is how I did it !! I hope you guys enjoy it if you try to make it !!

#badlydrawnbabydirk #baby dirk #dirk strider #homestuck #hom3stuck #bdhs #badlydrawnhomestuck #hs ask blog #mod speaks #Homestuck requiem cafe #requiem cafe

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boba-beom · 2 months

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hear me out

virgin hyuka who’s a little too excited to eat pussy for the first time and ends up cumming in his own pants

hold AWN j, you're onto something 😵‍💫

virgin!boyfriend sub!hyuka x fem!reader, reader babying kai, kai cums in his pants :p

imagine your cute virgin!boyfriend hyuka, and you invite him over after reassuring him that you have the house to yourself for the weekend.

he's a little nervous, and you can tell because you caught him fiddling with the hem of his baggy tshirt. so you replace the tshirt in his hand with your own hand, rubbing your thumb against his skin to soothe his mind.

"kai, baby? wanna see my room?" you coo as you look up at him, his cheeks flushed with a light rose pink colour.

"y-yeah, I haven't seen the rest of your room yet." he brings up the fact that you guys have been on video call so many times but he's only seen one side of your room — the one wall where your bed is. that's from when you two were sexting and masturbating through call, plenty of times.

you nod your head and give him a gentle smile, leading him up the staircase of your house while your hand is still in his, trailing after you.

you open the door to your room and you watch your cute boyfriend towering over you, breaths gentle and steady as he walks in slowly to scan each section of your room.

"get comfy, sweetcheeks." you nod your head in the direction of your bed, closing the door and walking over to him.

you have an idea in your head that could excite kai, but you wanted him to ease into the new setting. finding a comfortable spot on your bed, you lean back against your bed frame, legs slightly parted with the flimsy material of your skirt falling in the space between your thighs.

kai is still eyeing your room, how it's so pretty and full of your interests and hobbies. his eyes land on the plushies at the end of your bed, then at your ankles just centimetres away from the plushies. his eyes continue scanning up your legs, spread apart and his cheeks start burning up at the way you look at him with lust-filled eyes.

"wanna try something?" you ask him, stretching out your hand to cup his cheek and he nods in your hold. "wanna make me feel good, baby?"

"always wanna make you feel good." he croaked, chest heaving at the thought. his virgin dick throbs in his the confinements of his pants and his head starts to go hazy from the thought.

"let's put that pretty mouth of yours to good use, hm?"

the bed shifts from the way kai rushes to lie on his front and rests his cheek against your inner thigh while he looks up at you. the view was so pretty for you. your cute virgin boyfriend about to eat you out for the first time, all while him being in your house for the first time.

you give kai a gentle nod, encouraging him to go ahead with it. and he does. his large, but slender fingers lifting your skirt to see your core glistening all for him.

no panties. is all he could think about and it already has him rubbing his hard on against your mattress.

kai wastes no time and presses a kiss or two on your inner thighs before diving into your drenched cunt, flicking his tongue at your clit and already has you whining lightly.

"so– mph, pretty." he mumbles against your slick clit, then sucking harshly at your bundle of nerves.

"ah– that's my good boy, yes baby." you moan above him, propped on your elbows so you can see the way his eyes are shut as he eats you out and his hips... stuttering?

you feel kai's groans vibrating against your clit, the sensation sending you chills and feeling your clit pulse against his tongue. lacing your fingers through his blonde locks, you tug on them slightly, getting him to kneel up with ragged breaths.

you thank your sweet boyfriend for wearing khaki green cargos, attracting your eyes to the sticky dark spot spreading across the material of his crotch. but still being able to see his bulge pressing against the material had your lips twitching upwards.

"oh, my sweet baby," you coo, "got too excited and came in your pants and you haven't even fucked me yet. still got enough to fuck me, baby?"

kai lets an airy moan out from the filth slipping out your mouth, feeling his dick jump in his pants. he was ashamed, but in all honesty, he didn't mind it as much. you were his girl anyway, and he has a newfound liking for you belittling him.

"am I allowed to cum inside you?" he whimpers, desperate for you to give him permission to do so.

despite it about to be his first time fucking you, you're far from being a virgin but you knew your cutie of a boyfriend wouldn't have the ability to pull out. he didn't even have the ability to hold it while eating you out for a minute.

"because you asked so nicely, of course you can cum inside me baby."

you pull him towards you, a hand behind his neck and your lips connecting, molding together in a sweet kiss, able to taste the remnants of your slick from his tongue. as you pull away, you look him in the eyes and whisper.

"fill me up with your big load."

#j ᡣ𐭩 #enha-cafe ᡣ𐭩 #[ 🪴 ] — asks.#[ 🧸 ] — mutuals.#hueningkai smut #hueningkai drabble #hueningkai hard thoughts #hueningkai hard hours #mdni #smiles hard hours

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hotvintagepoll · 16 days

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not me, who finds no one "hot" in the traditional sense (either men or women) still voting on these polls on "which is more aesthetically pleasing" (is that ok if not ill stop sorry)

That's absolutely ok. I've said before that I want people to vote on whatever feels hot to you, in whatever way that means, and I stick by that. Let your vote be guided by looks, lust, aesthetics, desire, vibes, values, politics, scrungliness—whatever helps you decide: if both these hotties came over to you in the bar, which one would you take home?

#and obviously you can tweak the above too if it doesnt fit you (ie not bar but bookstore or cafe)#(or not home for sex but just smooching and convo if you're demi. or board games if you're ace. etc etc)#but the gist. you know. whatever to you says HOT.#asks

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askchuuyanakahara · 4 months

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I’m glad you found Yoshiko! :)

Chuuya: "Please, let me treat you to something."

Atsushi: "Ah, well.."

Atsushi: "I forgot how intense this guy can get.."

Atsushi: "I haven't seen Dazai-san at all.."

Chuuya: "Of course he's ditching work, that idiot."

Chuuya: "I don't wanna think about that."

Atsushi: "Mm.. I don't really want to think about it either."

#ask #update #anonymous #suru1990 #bsd chuuya #bsd atsushi #bungo stray dogs #(cafe!!!)#(also to avoid confusion the coat is not Dazais its Chuuyas it just looks like Dazais)#(Dazais currently wearing his coat!!)

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animatedglittergraphics-n-more · 3 months

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pixel coffee/cafe dividers

source▪️f2u (please don't claim as your own)

requested by anon

#my asks #anon #coffee dividers #cafe dividers #favicon dividers #page dividers #line dividers #dividers #separators #divider #transparent #decome #webcore #f2u

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chrollohearttags · 1 year

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Y/n pranks Eren with a fake divorce paper?😭

LMAOOOO!! please. Honestly, I feel like at first, it wouldn’t really stick 😭 like you’d walk up to him with a piece of paper, saying you wanted a divorce and he’d just laugh!! He’d turn around, look at it and then go back to what he was doing. “Quit playing, (y/n). You ain’t getting rid of me.” Because as far as he’s concerned, you’re stuck with him forever. Y’all locked in! But when he sees you’re not budging and your face is completely stoic, he spins around one more time and his smile fades. “Wait…you for real? You serious, (y/n)?” And you don’t say anything (hell, you might even throw in a tear to make it plausible) that’s when he gets up and starts acting all serious. “What’d I do? You really gone leave me?!” He gets SO upset and almost starts crying. Sliding to the floor and grabbing your hips, begging. “I can fix whatever it is. We don’t have to do this.” You can’t take it! Seeing him so sad almost breaks your heart and you just gotta start laughing, pulling him close to you in a hug. “Awwww, baby! I’m not leaving you. I was just kidding, it’s a prank.” By this time, his face is red and his voice is shaky. “What the fuck, (y/n)?! Don’t do that!” And you gotta spend the next ten minutes calming him down. “I’m sorry, sweetheart. I was just joking. You know I love you.” He’s so pathetic it’s actually cute.

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southernfoodtournament · 1 year

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HOW DID MAC N CHEESE WIN AGAINST BEIGNETS THIS IS A CRIME

Beignets... in the arms of the angels......

#ask #luveuly #will someone please take my gay ass to cafe du monde

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cuubism · 10 months

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I have been absolutely loving Bookstore Cryptid Dream! Offline life got rough for a bit there, but this little universe never failed to make my heart happy. Thank you - and I hope you're planning on more!

i've indeed had one in my drafts so i finished it up for you :)

Hob has been waiting with equal parts anticipation and trepidation to find out exactly what ideas Dream will pull from his romance novels. He still hasn't figured out why he picked romance novels as his manuals. Maybe he needs his sex positions to have narratives. Maybe he's into roleplay. God.

But Hob doesn't get to find out.

He's been busy for a few days--new term at the local uni starting up means the cafe's suddenly gotten busier--and while Dream's popped in and out a few times, they haven't had the chance to spend much time together. It's probably good, Hob tries to convince himself. Puts the brakes on things, just a little.

But when he finally gets a break, hands the reins over to his staff for an evening, he heads to The Library. Even if Dream is busy with his own tasks, Hob's content to just sit in his space. Listen to his stories. It's not something the busy cafe environment usually allows, but The Library is like an alternate world, cool, quiet, and timeless.

Hob strides up the steps and opens The Library door.

And there's nothing inside.

It takes several moments for his tired brain to comprehend what he's looking at, and several more for him to decide that no, he's not dreaming. He steps through the doorway into a dim, empty room, old wood-paneled walls and dust gathering in the corners, and no infinite winding paths of shelves like in Dream's bookshop. Just a shell.

Hob presses his palm to the wall. It's cool, and smooth, and very much real. Not some mad hallucination of his, this empty room.

Blinking hard, Hob steps back outside, closes the door again, as if that might change things. Opens it again. Same room. Does it again. Same room. He calls out into the empty bowels of the once-Library: "Dream!"

No answer, of course.

Hob had known that The Library had a sort of magic to it. But just vanishing into thin air...

And Dream wouldn't...

...would he?

Hob spins in place on the stoop, looking out on the darkened street which suddenly feels so much more eerie. He steps down to the road in a daze, looking around as if The Library might suddenly appear in another doorway. Resists the urge to yell Dream's name into the darkness.

And then, well, fuck it. "Dream!" he calls. All that echoes back to him is his own voice.

Hob sits down on the stoop, defeated. If he hadn't seen Dream just yesterday, kissed him on his way out of the cafe not twenty-four hours ago, he really might have started to think he'd hallucinated all of this. Invented someone he'd wanted to know.

But he didn't invent Dream, he swears he didn't--so then where is he?

Hob doesn't sleep much that night. He doesn't do much of anything else, either--it's not like Dream left a note to track him down, or any evidence of his existence. It's not like Hob can put up missing person posters: have you seen this bookshop? Or force it to reappear.

He's having a very sleep-deprived, very over-caffeinated morning shift in the cafe, contemplating how long one's not-quite-human not-quite-boyfriend needs to be not-quite-missing before it's reasonable to start finding out which parts of London harbor demons and sorcerers--when a man he's never seen before stops at the counter, hands folded before him, and says, "Excuse me, but do you know if there's a bookshop around here?"

Hob has never seen anyone else ever go into The Library or even acknowledge its existence, and Hob's anxiety is so high that he almost leaps over the counter to grab this man by the collar and demand, what do you know about Dream?! Fortunately he belays that impulse. This stranger really does look almost laughably harmless and definitely not like a demon or sorcerer, not that Hob's seen one--and getting arrested for assault is not going to help anything.

"I tried the door," continues the stranger, as Hob just keeps staring at him, conflicted, "only, well. It seems to have vanished."

Well, at least Hob's not hallucinating. Not that a disappearing bookstore is helpful to his sanity.

After what was surely a conspicuously long silence, though his visitor just waits patiently, Hob says, "Have... you been there before?" He feels weirdly defensive of The Library, even if it's currently AWOL. He doesn't know if he wants random people to be able to find Dream.

Or maybe that's just jealousy.

"Oh, no, this is my first time coming this way," says the man, apologetically. "I'm just looking for a certain book."

Damn odd timing for it.

Hob comes out from behind the counter and waves him over to a table. He should probably get some tea. Proper hospitality and all. But he's too worked up and way too sleep-deprived.

His guest sits down primly at the table as Hob slouches against the back of his own seat. "Sorry," Hob finally says, "if I'm--" he waves a vague hand. "Dream's had trouble before, that's all." He holds out his hand to his guest. "Hob."

The man shakes his hand. "Hm. A pleasure. I am Aziraphale. To any associate of--" he tastes the name, "Dream's, that is."

It's interesting that The Library's reputation carries further than knowledge of Dream himself, despite how deeply Dream seems to be tied to the shop.

"Is it meant to be there, then?" asks Aziraphale hopefully. "I wouldn't blame him for moving around to protect the collection; I certainly wouldn't want all and sundry picking through the shelves!" He shudders. "Though I was hoping to find that book."

Hob doesn't bother asking what book. Whatever it is, Dream will certainly have it. What's more important is--

"'Moving around?' Do you know how?" And then, realizing if he wants a chance at info he's going to need to offer some of his own, adds, "You just missed him, it's only today that The Library's been... gone."

"Oh, dear," says Aziraphale, now looking troubled.

"Not sure what pointed you towards this place, but if you've heard anything..." Hob continues, "Dream is my--" what is Dream, anyway? They haven't established it, "...friend."

Looking contemplative, Aziraphale says, "Well it is odd timing, now that you mention it, because--"

That's when the door to The Library flies open.

A lanky man comes hurtling down the steps, limbs akimbo, yelling something over his shoulder that Hob can't hear from within the cafe. "Oh dear," says Aziraphale again, with a mix of concern and consternation. "Crowley!"

Dream storms out of the doorway next, expression thunderous, his hair sticking up in all directions like he'd been struck by lightning. That has Hob lurching to his feet, which Aziraphale does as well, and they both rush outside, just in time to hear--

"Look, it's just one silly book, okay?" The unfamiliar man--Crowley, presumably--says, stopping in the middle of the road and turning towards Dream. "Don't overreact."

Dream is, in fact, clutching a singular heavy book, and looks like he's just about to hurl it, except that Dream would never do something so undignified as that, Hob thinks.

Dream hurls the book at Crowley.

Or not.

Crowley catches it against his chest, stumbling back with the weight. "I do not accept," spits Dream, each word the strike of a nail, "surreptitious rummaging in my library."

"Oh come on," says Crowley, tossing the book to Aziraphale, who's just caught up to him and who catches it with a surprised little umph! sound. Crowley makes a shooing sort of go on, run gesture to Aziraphale, which he doesn't heed. "It's not like I was going to burn the place down. You're just prejudiced against demons."

"I am prejudiced against thieves," hisses Dream. Hob finally reaches his side before he can throw another book or something, lays a hand on Dream's arm. Though all he's really thinking is, demons?!

"Crowley," Aziraphale admonishes. "Please tell me you did not." He finally looks at the cover of the book, and gasps. "Crowley."

Crowley shrugs. "You wanted it, he had it."

Hob frowns, confused. "You don't need to steal from The Library. It's not a museum. Just go in and buy it." Not that Hob's ever actually paid for any of Dream's books.

Both Crowley and Aziraphale turn to him. "One could not simply give away such an artifact," says Aziraphale, caressing the book's leatherbound cover.

"Least not for a steep price," says Crowley, which evidently justifies his trying to swipe it. "I won't be beholden to the likes of you." He points at Dream.

Dream looks affronted. "Now who is prejudiced?"

"Let's back up," Hob says, unsure how he became the voice of reason here. He still has a hand wrapped around Dream's arm, it's grounding after the way Dream had just vanished on him. "What happened? Dream-- I tried to come over and you were just gone." The empty room past The Library doorway is going to continue to be nightmare fuel.

Dream makes an apologetic little sound. "I apologize. I closed all access to The Library for its protection. As it turned out, my assessment of the threat was overstated." He glares at Crowley and adds, darkly, "I thought you were from the school board. Breaking in in the dead of night like so."

Hob momentarily gets stuck on the fact that Dream considers the local school board a greater threat than an actual demon from hell.

"Which," Dream continues, "was utterly unnecessary. You could have simply come to The Library as a visitor and sought out what you were looking for. It would have been granted."

"Oh, so I was just supposed to know you actually sell your books?"

"The books will find their rightful recipients," Dream says stiffly.

"Crowley, you have been very rude," says Aziraphale, though he hasn't given up the book, "I think you should apologize."

"Eh," says Crowley, waving this off. Hob supposes it wouldn't really be given to demons to apologize for things. "You apologize if you really want to."

Aziraphale turns to Dream with a sigh. "I am sorry for my companion's behavior. And... grateful for the book."

Dream nods solemnly at him. It seems his ire does not extend to Aziraphale.

Crowley leans back on his heels, closer to Aziraphale. "Mayyybee we should go now."

Aziraphale nods. "Quite." He tips his head at Dream, and then at Hob. "Thank you for your hospitality, Hob."

Then he turns and hurries away, Crowley slinking along beside him. As they leave, Hob hears Aziraphale admonish, "Do you know how few booksellers there are with truly rare volumes? We cannot afford to make such enemies."

"Yeah, you're welcome, angel."

"...Thank you."

Hob shakes his head in bemusement and turns back to Dream. He takes both of Dream's arms in his hands now, holding onto him, looking him over. Unable to fully vanish the lingering panic of The Library just being gone. "Are you alright? I was... worried. When you disappeared."

"I am annoyed," Dream huffs, like it's a greater point of suffering than any actual injury. Then he leans in close to Hob, pressing a hand to his chest. "I apologize. I did not intend to cause you distress. I had to shut the doors rather quickly, but I hoped to resolve the issue before you had cause to visit The Library."

"It's alright, love. I'm just glad you're okay." He kisses Dream, tentative for how new this all still is. Tastes lightning on his lips. Dream hums with pleasure.

When they pull apart, Hob wraps an arm around Dream's back, starts leading him back towards the cafe, or perhaps just to Hob's flat above. Tea solves everything. "So. The school board, eh?"

Dream sighs with the weight of the world on his shoulders. "They are enthusiastic about banning books."

Hob pulls him against his side, kisses his temple. "Dream against the world."

Dream grumbles, but leans his head on Hob's shoulder, and despite the many strange things of today Hob is going to have to internalize, he feels all soft inside at the gesture.

"Don't worry," he says, "next time your many enemies come calling, just yell and I'll create a diversion."

"And be waiting with tea after I've dealt with them?"

"Got it in one."

As they reach the door to the cafe, Dream turns his head to kiss Hob's shoulder. "You are good to me, Hob Gadling."

And Hob will keep being so. Even when the next strange thing happens.

#hob: yep. same shit as always #idk in what type school boards do or don't exist in the uk maybe that's just an american thing #also realized i never named Hob's cafe lol. i guess now it's just called The Cafe. like The Library #fitting for a man who named his tavern The New Inn #bookstore cryptid dream #my writing #dreamling #dream of the endless #hob gadling #ask #lunaris1013 #good omens #crowley #aziraphale

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